Torch Song Trilogy (1988) Movie Script

'Arnold!'

Arnold!

Arnold.

Arnold, lunch is on the table!

Arnold!

Where is that kid?

Aah!

Oh, Arnold, what are

you doing in..

I think my biggest problem

is being young and beautiful.

It's because I've never

been young and beautiful.

Well, I've been beautiful.

God knows I've been young.

But never the twain have met.

Not so as anyone

would notice anyway.

You know, a shrink acquaintance

of mine believes this

to be the root of my attraction

to a class of men

most subtly described

as old and ugly.

I think he's underestimating

my wheedles.

See, a ugly person

who goes after a pretty person

gets nothing, but trouble.

But a pretty person

who goes after a ugly person

gets at least cab fare.

Now, I ain't sayin' I never

fell for a pretty face.

When les jeux sont faitsgive me

a toad with a pot of gold

I'll give you three meals a day

Ain't no toad when

the lights go down.

It's either feast or famine.

It's the daylight you got

to watch out for.

Well, face it.

A thing of beauty

is a joy till sunrise.

Mm, mm.

There's another group you gotta

watch your foot stamps around.

The hopeless.

They break down

into three major categories.

Married.

Just in for the weekend.

Terminally straight.

Those affairs are the worst.

You go into them

with your eyes open

knowing all the limitations,

accepting them maturely.

Then wham bam, you're writing

letters to dear Abby

and you're burning black candles

at midnight.

And you ask yourself,

"what happened?"

I'm gonna tell you

what happened.

You got just what you wanted.

The person who thinks

they're mature enough

to handle an affair that's

hopeless from the beginning

is the very same person

that keeps the publishers

of gothic romances up to their

tragic endings in mink.

What do you think?

Gorgeous, huh?

Give me a break.

It's still under construction.

For those of youse

what ain't yet guessed.

I am an entertainer.

Or what's left of one.

I go by the name, Virginia Hamm.

Ain't that a kick

in the rubber parts?

You should hear some

of my former handles.

Anita Mann.

Fonda Boys.

Claire Voyant.

Fay Ways.

Bang-bang-la-desh.

Yeah.

I'm among the last

of a dying breed.

Once the E.R.A. and gay civil

rights bills have been passed

me and mine will find ourselves

swept under the carpets.

Like the blacks done

to Amos, Andy, and Aunt Jemima.

But that's alright.

With voice and face like this

I got nothing to worry about.

I can always drive a cab.

There are easier things in this

life than being a drag queen.

Tsk. But I ain't got no choice.

See, umm..

Try as I may..

...I just can't walk in flats.

Ha ha ha.

You know, there was one guy once

his name was Charlie.

He was everything you could want

in an affair and more.

Oh, he was tall.

Handsome.

Rich.

Deaf.

The deafness was the more.

Well, he had never yelled at me.

Never complained if I snored.

All his friends

was nice and quiet.

I-I even learned some

of that deaf sign language.

Oh, I-I remember some.

It's cockroach.

Means fuck.

Oh, this here's my favorite.

Means I love you.

And I did too.

But um..

Not

enough.

You know... in my life

I've slept with more men

than are named or numbered

in the bible.

Old and new testaments

put together.

But not once has someone said,

"Arnold... I love you."

That I could believe.

And I ask myself,

"do you really care?"

You know, the only honest answer

I can give myself is

"yes... I care"

I care a great deal.

Tsk, but

not

enough.

Ladies and gentlemen,

please welcome to our stage

Bertha Venation! Yay!

And now, the Queen of

Delicatessen, Virginia Hamm!

And now, senores and senoritas

please welcome, Marina del Rey!

And now, bigger than Broadway,

Marcia Dimes!

Ladies and gentlemen

in order to be a real dame

you've got to kneel

before a queen.

Oh, Miss Dimes, you're flawless.

But ladies and gentlemen,

wait until you see my act

Bertha Venation and her dance

of the virgin.

Which she does

completely from memory.

Bitch.

Brrr!

Kiss her quick. She's Carmen.

More!

- Roz, honey, you need a lift?

- Oh, that'd be great, thanks.

- Hey, you going straight home?

- No. Let's get a beer.

- So, what's the dish?

- Men.

My life's work.

What's the gripe?

- I ain't got one.

- Who wants one?

- I've got three.

- 'Find me out.'

Good night, ladies.

- Goodnight.

- Night, night dear.

I swear that queen gives me gas.

Oh. Ha ha ha.

Come on, let's go to the Stud,

I can use a nightcap.

And a quickie with some stranger

in the backroom.

- Count me out.

- It's very relaxing.

You'll find this hard

to comprehend

but I want more out of life

than meeting a pretty face.

- And sitting down on it.

- Graphically put.

Personally, I never enjoy sex

with someone I know.

- A lady of high standards.

- Cab! Night, girls!

- Night, Bertha!

Come with me. I know what to do.

- Oh, my God!

- Fucking faggots!

Piss off!

I'm tired and I want to go home.

- One drink, one look.

- I'm not goin' to the backroom.

Who asked you to?

I think I feel

the call of the wild.

Oh, don't leave me out here.

Oh, Murray, Murray, Murray!

Thank you.

Oh, God. I'm sorry.

Are you okay?

Fine.

No permanent damage,

I hope... to your foot.

No. It's fine.

Good.

Excuse me. Do you have a li..

Great.

Look, um, my name is Ed Reese.

My friends call me Ed.

I'm a Sagittarius.

What's so funny?

Some people like

to know that stuff.

I don't believe any

of it myself.

You have a great smile.

What's your name?

- Uh... Arnold.

- Arnold?

What do your friends call you?

Arnie or Arn?

Arnold.

Arnold. Yeah.

Well, nice to meet you, Arnold.

- Can I buy you a drink?

- I just..

Oh.

- So what are you? Italian?

- Uh, no.

Spanish?

Jewish.

Geez, uh, I mean I never

would have guessed.

No, I mean, not with those

dark, romantic eyes.

- You wearing makeup?

- No.

No, I mean, uh,

no, I didn't think so.

You, um, you here alone?

No. I'm with a friend.

He's in the back.

Oh.

Is he your-your..

Oh, no, no, no, just a friend.

Just a friend.

Oh.

Well..

How lucky for me.

Well, I've got a car.

If you're going to laugh

at everything I say

we're never gonna get to bed.

You really do

have beautiful eyes.

And you've got some routine.

Anyone ever tell you

you've got a very sexy voice?

No, really. You do.

Is that natural,

or do you have a cold?

'I'd have asked you to my place,

but my roommate is straight

'and he's not all that

comfortable with gays.'

'So where does that leave you?'

'Oh, well, I date women too.'

'I teach in Brooklyn,

I keep an apartment in the city

'but I-I really live upstate.'

'I've got a farm where I spend

weekends, summers.'

'I grow all my own vegetables.'

'You'd love the house, it's

a classic American saltbox.'

'Lots of wood detail,

Franklin stove.'

'I'm restoring it myself.'

'Sounds beautiful.'

- So what do you do?

- I'm a female impersonator.

No, you know,

I meant for a living.

I'm a female impersonator.

Does that bother you?

Not yet.

- Oh, wait. I'll get a light.

- No, just..

You're shaking.

Am I? Sorry.

Better?

Mm-hmm.

We're having an intimate dinner.

He's bringing the wine.

Why didn't you tell me you were

going out? I'd have come.

I better steal steaks from the

kitchen. Who has time to shop?

Have you registered

a pattern at Tiffany's?

'Bertha Venetian!'

I wonder which

apartment we'll keep.

We hardly need two with all the

time we'd spend at the farm.

The farm?

Well, you can't bring

up children in the city.

'Queen of the Delicatessen,

Virginia Hamm!'

Mm!

Oh-h!

Mm.

Happy two-week anniversary.

Oh, Ed, you remembered!

Thanks, Roz.

You oughta slap that girl

for stealing your material.

- You're the torch singer.

- Who cares?

I ain't singing anything bluer

than zip-a-dee-doo-dah.

- When do I get to meet him?

- Soon.

Have you met any of his

friends yet? Are they nice?

We don't get it out much,

if you know what I mean.

Shut up!

Come on. Oh, watch

your head in there.

And this first step

is a little broken.

Um, we got to work on that.

Good morning.

Alright. Alright.

Argh!

Whoosh!

I'll drop you off at your place.

I'm seeing Tom

and Janet for dinner.

You didn't tell me they called.

I forgot. Anyway,

I got to see them.

I've given them

every excuse in the book.

And you're seeing Lisa

and Michael tomorrow night?

They wanted to play bridge. Got

a friend in from out of town.

I'll go as your friend

from out of town.

- Arnold.

- Only joking.

So I guess I'm not gonna see

you again until the weekend.

My parents have the farm.

I told you that.

So hide out at my place.

I've got to see

my folks, Arnold.

Ed, why didn't you call first?

I was worried.

'Oh! Hi, mom.'

'Happy Birthday, shayna tateleh.

Happy Birthday, shayna punim'

'I can only stay a minute.

The girls are in the car.'

Charlotte got tickets to some

off-off Broadway theater.

It's experimental.

They keep their clothes on.

Your father will call

after his mason's meeting.

Your brother,

he'll call when he calls.

I ask him a question, he yells.

So I don't ask.

Are you redecorating?

It's easier than cleaning.

Don't be so funny.

You don't get much light here.

I get what you call

indirect semi shade.

Yeah, it's good for the plants.

So is manure.

Don't shake. It's cookies.

Ooh! Fancy, fancy.

New tablecloth.

I made it myself. Took a class.

I'm tellin' you.

I'm going to make napkins

to match. You like it?

- Nice.

- It's a pretty pattern.

Very nice.

- Mama, the ladies!

- Are you making potato soup?

Ma, don't. You'll burn yourself!

But not like the potato soup

I make for your father.

For him, I boil the potato,

throw in salt and pepper.

- That's potato soup.

- Ma, what are you doing?

I'm coming already!

Why don't you come with us?

Leave a note for your friend.

We'll come back here for cake.

You just go, have a good time.

And give my love to the ladies.

Many happy returns, tateleh.

Thanks, Ma.

While you're redecorating,

how about this wallpaper?

Yeah, I'll be right there.

Yeah, one minute.

Just a second, um..

Hi!

Oh, hi.

Was that you

on the phone before?

My phone was ringing

and I picked it up

just in time to hear

whoever it was hang up.

So I was gonna call you back.

But I figured why call

when I can come over?

- It wasn't me.

- Oh.

Look Arnold, this isn't

a great time to talk.

I shouldn't count on that wine

being my birthday surprise, huh?

- Your birthday!

- You remembered.

Oh, God! Arnold, I'm sorry.

What's the difference?

We're together now, right?

Well..

I've got somebody

coming over for dinner.

That's alright, I just want

to see you for a minute.

- I understand.

- What do you understand?

You never give me a chance

to make the first move.

Every time I'm about to call

you, there you are calling me.

ESP maybe.

So who you got coming over?

Do I know him?

No.

How do you know? Maybe I do.

I know lots of hims.

Battle Hymn of the republic,

Rock of Ages...

You're impossible,

you know that?

What's wrong with us, Ed?

- Not now, Arnold.

- Yes, now.

You can't expect me

to wait until you call.

I never asked you to, I told you

to meet other people.

I can't. I'm not built that way.

I'm just not ready

to make that commitment.

I'm not asking you to, but if

I've to accept you going out

then you have

to accept that I'm not.

You really are crazy.

I miss you.

I think about you all the time.

I'm so damn horny.

You've no right

to make me feel guilty.

I'm in love with you,

that must give me some rights.

If I can't see you,

I can bitch about it

Arnold.

Please.

Hello.

Hi, Laurel.

This is Arnold.

Of course! Ed's talked about

you. Glad to finally meet you.

He's told me all about you too.

I'm sorry, I've got to run now.

Allergies. I-I ought

to have my head examined.

Um, just..

Arnold, Arnold, Arnold.

Don't pretend I never told about

my relationships with women.

I thought you meant like

sisters and aunts and nieces.

- That's not funny.

- I think it's hysterical.

'You're really dragging me

over the coals.'

Why should I be the only one

here with a barbecued ass?

Arnold.

Arnold, look, I'm not like you.

Being gay is what you are,

it's what you like.

It's what you're

comfortable with.

I want more, I can't be happy

living in a ghetto of gay bars.

- We've never done that.

- I need to be proud of who I'm.

How can sleeping

with a woman make you proud

if you know you'd rather

be with a man?

How will you get any respect

if you're not yourself?

'There's no you to respect!'

Where is your self-respect?

I don't see any here.

You want to see my self-respect?

Here, here's my self-respect.

Hi.

Can I buy you a drink?

Oh, fuck off!

Oh, I'm sorry.

Excuse Me. Pardon Me.

Sorry.

Hi, my name's Arnold.

It's my fault, I'm sure.

Oh, my God.

What am I gonna do

with the beer can?

Well, at least I don't have

to cook him breakfast.

'With all the promotions,

mine can't be far.'

'Promotions are fine,

but how about a nice girl?'

Leave the boy alone. He'll find

one when he's ready.

- They don't come every day.

- You tell 'em.

You boys gotta admit, I picked

a beautiful girl as your mother.

You tell 'em.

- You want some rice pudding?

- No.

I made Jell-O, but if you want

nice pudding..

- No, Ma.

- Nothing for me, Ma.

- Piece of cake?

- I'm full.

So what's with you, Arnold?

Not much. I'm not

seeing Ed anymore.

- I meant work.

- You call that work?

Betty, the boy has

to find himself.

So let him find himself,

I'm not saying anything.

- I'd love some cheesecake.

- Go to Junior's.

So you can use

a couple of bucks, Arnold?

'I'm fine, Dad.'

Take it, a loan.

Until you're on your feet.

- I'm on my feet, Daddy.

- Yeah, in six-inch heels.

- Some big shot.

- Excuse me.

They don't mean

anything, you know?

Then, why embarrass me

like that?

I make more than daddy does.

They have trouble

understanding, that's all.

There isn't anything

they wouldn't do for you.

Don't be mad at them.

I'm not mad. I'm jealous.

You realize in all the years

that they've been married

the only time they

were ever separated

was when ma went into the

hospital for that operation.

And what did daddy do?

He slept on a chair

in the living room.

He wouldn't even get

into bed without her.

And the way they always

made us feel

like we were the two

most important

smartest, most talented,

handsomest..

And it kills me to think..

...that they look at me

and wonder what they did wrong.

All I know is in all my born

days and there've been plenty

I never met a real bisexual.

- Not in front of you-know-who?

- It's alright. Not listening.

Just once I'd like

to see a bisexual that lived

with his boyfriend and then

snuck out to see his girlfriend

on the sly.

Is Arnold Beckoff..

You wanna give 'em room?

Alright. Come on.

Bet you never thought

you'd see me again, huh?

Hi.

You look terrific.

Really.

You've lost a little weight

I see. I'm sorry.

I guess you're still

pretty angry, huh?

No, I'm not still angry.

This here's brand new.

- What are you doin' here?

- I just wanted to talk.

Five months ago you checked

out on me and the one thing

I can say is that

when you left, you left.

'No matter what I thought

of your reasons... '

I told you that I wanted us

to be friends.

'You mean a lot to me.'

Don't get cute with me, huh?

Maybe I shouldn't have come,

but as long as the harm's done

can't I just talk

to you for a while?

I mean just, no, just

until you're finished.

'It's important to me.'

Just sit down.

So how's your sex life?

It's great.

As good as with me?

Arnold, I'm, I'm not so sure

that the sex we had was always

as good for me

as it was for you.

Sometimes you got a little wild,

little too out of control.

And that's bad?

Well, it's not what I want.

It's funny.

That's what I pray for.

I thought about you

a lot this summer.

A couple of times,

I almost called you.

I even picked up the phone once.

Yeah, so what happened?

Well, I couldn't.

I love her, Arnold.

Oh, um, I had a dream last night

that I want to tell you about.

I mean, you like

that sort of stuff.

Anyway, um, I was..

I dreamt I was

at my parent's house

and I got a rag

and I soaked it in turpentine

put it inside a plastic bag

and put the bag over my head.

And um..

Anyway, the phone

woke me in the morning.

It was Laurel and I couldn't

understand what she was saying.

You know, half of me's trying

to listen to her.

The other half's trying

to figure out this dream.

I felt dizzy,

so I-I went back to bed

and there on the pillow is..

You know, the-the plastic bag

with the turpentine-soaked rag.

Um..

I couldn't tell any..

You know, anybody about it.

I'm..

...a little scared.

So what, do you got

your car with you?

Yeah, um, do you want me

to drive you home?

Um, why don't you get the car

and I'll meet you out front?

Oh.

So what now, huh?

Look, if I take him back now,

knowing all I do

maybe I can make it work

With a little understanding.

Maybe a shrink.

I could just let him

drive me home

And then I could say

something like, uh

"the next time you feel you have

to say I love you to someone"

"say it to yourself

and see if you believe it."

That would go over his head.

I think it went over mine.

I could just sneak out the back,

leave him waitin' in the cold.

'Cause if I start in again

who's to say he's not gonna

keep this shit up, right?

I don't know.

Maybe it's what I want.

Maybe he's treating me

just the way I want him to.

I mean what if it's me

using him to give me that

tragic torch singer status

I admire so in others?

Wouldn't that be a kick

in the rubber parts?

I love him.

What are you gonna do?

But do I love him enough?

What is enough?

This is enough.

Enough.

Oh, weren't they

wonderful, boys and girls?

Yeah!

Especially, the boys. Ow-w-w!

Ow ow ow, the last time

I saw a basket like that

it was around

Red Riding Hood's arm.

One more time.

Oh.

I'll see you around

and I'll see you around.

- And I'll see you around...

- Hey, where's Bette?

- Bette?

- 'Yeah.'

Darling, I don't do Bette

without a c-cigarette.

- 'Over here.'

- Oh.

You mean Bette

as Baby Jane Hudson?

Yay!

Blanche.

You didn't eat your din-din.

So someone else is gonna

eat your Christmas puddin'.

Who's gonna eat

my Christmas balls?

How rude?

You have a high voice

for a lesbian.

'And now ladies and gentlemen,

it gives me great pleasure'

to bring you the favorite

of all of us as I present

the supreme artiste

of the song...

Fuck the artiste!

Bring on the freaks!

Did your mother

have any children that lived?

Thank you, darling.

And now ladies and gentlemen

and nasty little boys

I want to present

the queen of the torch song

our very own Virginia Hamm.

These for real, huh? Huh, baby?

Looks like a boiled ham to me.

Baby, show us your dick.

'Come on. Pull it out.'

'Come on. Pull it out.

What's the matter?'

Ain't you got one,

Huh? Huh? Pull it out.

'Come on, whip it out.'

Hey, sit on this.

Won't you boys,

show some respect, huh?

Maybe you'd like me to carve

a reminder on your pretty face.

'Gregory.'

Please.

I wasn't gonna hurt him anyway.

Just wanted to teach him

a manner or two.

You alright, kid?

Roz.

Put it in my dressing room.

Peter, 1, 2..

- I see you're alright.

- I'm alright.

- Reach the door.

- Okay, careful with him.

- He's a person.

- I used to be a person.

- Alright, straight in the back.

- It figures.

Come on.

God.

- Alright?

- Yeah.

- Okay, you can dump him here.

- Alright.

Here, thanks and close

the door on your way out.

Sure.

If you have an IQ over 30,

then there is no God.

- Hi.

- Who are you?

- I've got a better one for you.

- Who are you?

- My name's Alan.

Arnold.

Do you remember anything

at all about last night?

Not too much.

I don't usually drink, but you

know how it is in the holidays.

So you and I met where?

Why don't you go sit down?

I'll give you breakfast.

We met at the club East 4th.

You seemed to be having trouble.

You were the waiter.

I were the entertainment.

Virginia Hamm.

Oh, you're kidding?

Anyway, you're in Brooklyn.

The subway's up the block.

Turn right, three blocks.

And you don't have

to worry about anything.

I was a perfect gentleman.

Thanks.

Shit, um, I have a photo shoot

today and I'm late.

Um, hello?

Listen, I've gotta run,

but I'll call you later, okay?

Hello?

Exactly what I needed..

Hi, you-you saw me

in the audience, right?

Every queen in Harlem

saw you in the audience

You were terrific.

A little weird, but different.

Thanks.

Hello? I'm another person

in the world.

Hi. You know, I hope you

don't mind me saying so

but I think that I prefer

you in men's clothes.

- Ooh, child.

- Well, thanks for dropping by.

Oh, um, I-I brought

you something.

I couldn't help but notice

that you liked them.

That was really sweet. Thanks.

Look, can I take you to dinner?

- To make up for last night?

- Free chow. You got my vote.

Oh, thanks.

Maybe another time, huh?

We've really gotta run.

You know, it's Christmas

and I never did finish

my Christmas shopping.

There's an all-night sale

at the market. Thanks though.

- What is the matter with you?

- What is wrong with you..

'...you're full

of chicken shit.'

'I came to New York to be gay.'

'I don't have to tell you

the kind of reception'

'a 15-year-old barefoot boy

with cheek of tan'

'gets in the big apple.'

All any guy I met cared

about was my price tag

for the evening.

I figured I needed affection

more than they needed the money

so I took it.

'I'm 21, successful..'

...and still every guy I meet

takes one look at me

and all he wants is sex.

Every guy I meet

takes one look at me

and all he wants

is conversation.

I wouldn't say all.

- Morning.

Wh-what do you think?

Kate Smith, right?

- Yeah, Judy Canova.

- I don't do her.

- Then, put the dress back.

- Gentlemen, please..

Don't lose your beans, honey.

We got cash.

Yes.

- What do you think?

- Fabulous for Canasta.

Wouldn't you gentlemen feel more

comfortable in another store?

Worry not, my dear. We're simply

slumming until Halston opens.

- I'm gonna try this one out.

- No, no, no, Sir.

Don't look now, but pretty boy

has tracked you down again.

Oh, my God.

- Would you stop?

- 'Tis love. 'Tis love.

Him looking at you like a 3 year

old at his first ice cream cake.

And you're running from him

for your life.

Now, honey, my calculus

may not be up to snuff

but I still can put

two and two together.

And what I get is love.

- May I help you, Sir?

- No, thanks.

- Sir. Sir.

- Do you have these in a 16?

Arnold?

Yes?

Sorry.

- Arnold?

- 'Oh, my God.'

I love the way

this drapes on you.

Arnold, I can't think

about anybody else but you.

I don't want to see

anybody else but you.

I don't even want to talk

to anybody else but you.

So... you gonna

come out of there?

- Want me to break the door?

- I'm calling the police.

Oh, nonsense. Let me see

that in his size.

There are a couple of things

we better get straight first.

A, I want children.

B, if anyone asks,

I'm the pretty one.

'Alan, where the hell are you?'

I had to make a call.

Okay, I'm listening.

- Alright, number three here...

- Oh, wait. Wait.

Alright. Let's go. Come on.

Employment, husband.

Employment, wife.

I knew one day

we'll have to decide.

If we could figure that,

we could have our own kids.

- What should I put for age?

- Write 54. Let them break it.

- What aged child?

- Oh.

Old enough to dust.

That's all I care.

'You're listening to the station

dedicated to the one you love.'

'So listen up friends, here

is the stuff you really like.'

'A 3-year anniversary.'

'A special song

for a special couple.'

'For Arnold, with all the love

in my soul, from Ellen.'

- Alan, asshole, Alan.

- Was that you?

For God's sake, don't cry.

Hello, home wrecker.

Oh, hi, Ma.

Mama, what's wrong?

Arnold, tateleh,I'm sorry.

It's your father.

I'll be right there, Mama.

Amen.

Thank you so much, rabbi.

It was beautiful.

Thank you all for coming.

We'll see you back at the house.

Thank you so much

for coming so far.

Thank you. You got off

from school today, didn't you?

Thank you for coming

on such an awful day.

This is where I'll be, between

your father and grandfather.

And Phil, over here's for you

and your wife and your children.

Tateleh,over here's for you

and your wife and your children.

- Oh, Ma.

- You'll meet a girl someday.

Believe me, Ma. I know.

God doesn't know. My son knows.

Why are the mirrors covered?

So we don't see

the pain in our faces.

And why are you

sitting on boxes?

To make sure there's pain

in our faces.

You told me he was Jewish.

Out-of-town Jewish.

So, Mama, what're you gonna do?

Are you gonna keep the house?

I'll teach out the term,

put the house up for sale..

...and go live in Florida.

What are you talking? Florida?

Phil and I are here.

That's what we do.

We go to Florida.

When my father died

my mother went to Florida.

And her mother before that.

That's what we do.

We go to Florida.

I don't care what we do.

What do you want to do?

I want to die.

Until then I'll go to Florida.

Hello.

'Oh, I woke you?'

Good guess.

- 'Is this Arnold?'

- That's what they tell me.

- Who is that?

- I don't know.

'Oh, come on. Speak up. I'm a

drag queen, not a mind reader.'

Well... I don't know

if you'd remember me.

Uh, we have a mutual friend,

Ed Reese.

'We met at his place once.

My name's Laurel.'

'Uh, Ed and I live together.

We're lovers.'

Anyway, we got to talking

and thought it'd be nice

to have you up to visit

for a few days.

'Hello? Are you with me?'

I'm way ahead of you.

Sorry, I ain't into

none of that kinky stuff.

'Ed said you were funny.'

Yeah, right. Tell me,

whose idea was this?

'We'd both like you to come.'

Yeah, yeah. Whose idea was it?

What's the difference?

I know how much Ed

values your friendship

and the two of you

don't get to meet anymore..

Look, I don't think

this is such a good idea.

But thanks for the invite.

- I wanna go.

- Are you out of your mind?

- We are going.

- We are not.

Shut up. We're going.

Isn't this civilized?

Guests up to our country

home for the weekend.

We've had guests before.

We can hardly compare this

to having your sister

and her kids or your parents up.

Imagine. Hostess to your lover's

ex and his new boyfriend.

Now, that isn't civilized,

I don't know what is.

- It's down right..

- Would you stop?

- This is it.

- Hi.

Alright, you finally made it.

How you doing? Look at this.

- Hi.

You look great.

This is Laurel.

- Arnold, Hi.

- You're Alan.

Yeah.

- You need help?

- Oh, Thanks.

You got it? Good.

This is Laurel, and, uh,

come on, let's go on inside.

- Hi, Laurel.

- How are you?

Come on in.

Ha ha ha.

Yeah. Ha ha ha.

So, Arnold, Ed tells me

you're a transsexual.

- Transvestite.

- I'm sorry.

That's alright. Look, actually,

I'm just a drag queen.

Did I tell you I'm teaching

my classes computers?

- It's an experimental program.

- Really?

He's even tried teaching me

a thing or two, but I'm baffled.

You know, hardware, software

I can never remember

which is which.

Easy. Just remember computers

are the opposite of people.

With computers, the software

goes into the hardware.

And with people...

My, my! All this good food

has just done me in.

What say we hit the hay? Eh?

Did you see how he fawned

over Alan at dinner?

He practically cut

his steak for him.

No more than I fawned over you.

I did cut your steak.

I could have killed

you for that.

The two of you were lovers.

Little games and jealousies

are going to pop up.

Did you see how

he made such a point

of running off to bed early?

Oh, I'm so tired.

All that good food

has just done me in.

Hm. If I had someone as pretty

as that to go to bed with

I wouldn't have stayed

late up either.

- You think he's pretty?

- Uh-huh.

Don't you think he's

a little young?

Uh-uh. You hear the way their

bed springs were squeaking?

I think that I do pretty well

in the squeaking departments.

Oh, you do.

Yeah, making certain allowances

for wear and tear.

Oh, no. Too early in the race

to make a plea for sympathy.

Oh, you want to race?

Ok. We'll race.

May the best man win.

Jesus! Do you hear that?

Oh, baby, talk dirty to me.

Well, go outside and

listen at their door.

Give my best to the bisexuals.

Only he's bisexual.

She's straight.

Too bad mixed marriages

never work.

- So what do you think?

- About what?

Seeing Ed again with

me to compare him to.

Is that what we're doin' here?

He ain't so hot.

Not hot enough to be the great

love of your life anyway.

I never said he was the

great love of my life.

He's got his good points though.

He's good-natured,

good-looking, good in bed.

Good and boring.

He's not good and boring.

He's just plain boring.

- But you loved him, right?

- I guess so.

He loved you.

I see the way he looks at you.

- Why did you two break up?

- We wanted different things.

Like what?

I wanted a husband.

He wanted a wife.

That was delicious, Laurel.

Isn't she a great cook,

besides being beautiful?

- Just delicious.

- I bet I gained five pounds.

Ed, why don't you take Arnold

and Alan out to the barn

and show them our

new canning machine?

We can all of our

vegetables, you know.

Thanks. I've seen the barn.

Ed, why don't you take

Alan out and show it to him?

He's the real can connoisseur

in the family.

I'll stay and help

Laurel with the dishes.

We're yet to have a moment alone

to compare notes on you.

Oh, just what she's

been waiting for.

- Ed!

- Mind if I steal the brandy?

Come on.

Stuck with the dishes.

It's right up there.

Tell me about you.

That's the reason we're here.

- Is it?

- Sure is.

Wasn't going to let

this opportunity

to meet my competition go by.

- I'm no competition.

- I am.

- So talk.

- Why don't you ask Arnold?

I'm sure he has lots

to say on the subject.

He says you're a boring,

self-centered

insensitive old fool

who wouldn't know love

if it wore wings, diaper and

shot heart shaped arrows

at your butt.

- Anything you'd care to add?

- No. That'll do.

What do you think?

I think I'll reserve my judgment

until I can make

a closer inspection.

Close enough?

You asked me to sit in

the hay, not roll in it.

I think you're very beautiful.

I thought you were reformed.

You want me to stop..

...just say so.

Do you?

I didn't think so.

Let's go.

I'm sorry you couldn't

stay for supper.

- Yeah, so are we, Arnold.

- Yes. It's a shame.

Laurel, Listen, I'll call you.

- And thanks.

- Drive safe, okay?

What the hell's wrong with you?

- I'm driving.

- Okay, bye.

Hey, give us a call anytime.

Maybe we'll do it

again sometime.

'Yeah. Sounds good to me.'

- 'What's wrong with you?'

- 'Take it easy.'

'Let's just get out of here.'

Oh, I'm sorry.

I thought you weren't at home

and I was working out

some frustration.

And I thank you for it.

Come on in.

- Is Alan here?

- No.

He had some early appointments.

Are you alright?

I could use some caffeine.

I can't believe how I misjudged

your relationship with Alan.

Actually, you're

so perfect together.

I'm certain you'll

work everything out.

I wasn't aware of anything

that needed working out.

- You two didn't have words?

- None we haven't used before.

You mean what happened

between Ed and Alan

'doesn't bother you at all?'

What?

You blurted it out

just like that?

Thought he knew.

It was a friendly remark.

With friends like her

who needs divorce court!

- Why'd you think I left him?

- 'Cause of something I said.

- You gonna tell Laurel?

- What I do is my own business.

Ed told me about it after

you left. He was crying.

I was dumbfounded. I didn't know

which one of us to comfort.

- All you had to do is ask.

- Ask what?

Not to fool around.

And I wouldn't.

You never asked me?

I wanted you to feel you could.

You mean you wanted me

to feel that you could.

For once I'd love

to have an affair

go on the rocks

after the passion wears off?

Your the one who that wanted

this weekend and wanted..

Just 'cause I said that's what

I wanted doesn't mean I wanted.

May be, what I wanted. Doesn't

mean I'm ready for it.

- You want me see other men?

- No.

- I want you to feel you can.

- I do and I did!

Just once, I'd like to be

standing on sure ground

when the blow hits,

instead of crawling around

on my hands and knees

like a baby.

There's something

I want to ask you.

The answer's yes.

You don't even

know the question.

I'm too tired to argue anymore,

so whatever it is

my answer's yes.

Good.

'Cause I love you too.

'That's it, Alan. Come on, yes.'

'Now, pour the man

some champagne.'

'That's it.

Don't give him a bath.'

Oh, yes, your looking

beautiful. Beautiful.

Alan, give me a smile.

Wonderful. Yes.

Hi, Arnold. Alan, take five.

Shelley, stay there.

Can somebody focus

this light here?

Shelley, come over here.

I wanna do something..

Yeah. Fix that

little spot over there.

- Bad news?

- What?

- Who's the letter from?

- Ah, Laurel.

They're getting married.

- You're kidding?

- No.

"And so we figured, two years

after that wonderful weekend

"ha ha ha, well, if we could

survive that together

"then we could make it

through anything

"and so we'll be

tying the knot."

I think we should take their

example and get married.

Yeah. Sure.

Any day now a giant stork

is gonna come

rapping on our door

with a bundle of joy.

I think the kid deserves

legitimate parents.

- What are you talking about?

- The institute called.

- We're going to have a baby.

- You..

Yeah. We gotta find

an apartment fast.

They won't give him to us until

he can have a room of his own.

- Him?

- His name is David.

He's 15, troubled, abused.

- He's also gay.

- Oye.

So will you?

- What?

- Marry me.

Excuse me. Sorry.

Welcome to the neighborhood.

Fabulous.

Really terrific neighborhood

you picked here.

It's barely dark,

and they're out in numbers.

Maybe we should get an infrared

telescope for the living room.

- Great way to bring up a child.

- 'Lift, lift.'

- Are we going to have a dog?

- Why? What for?

- For the kid.

- That's a great idea.

What kind should we get?

The kind that can

walk in the park.

You're a funny guy. Real funny.

Wait. Okay. Push. Okay.

God, I feel so butch.

Hey, should you be carrying

this in your condition?

Shouldn't you be lying down

with your feet up or something?

You're even starting

to look like a mother.

- Gray hair and all.

- I do not have gray hair.

I can see it from here.

Yeah, well you gave me

every one of 'em.

My old man.

What if he hates us?

- I'm hungry. Let's go eat.

- I'm tired. Let's go to bed.

Where?

Oops.

Well, why don't you

go get some take-out?

And I'll see what I can

do with the bedroom.

- Dinner in bed.

- By candlelight?

Buy candles.

Sorry.

You fuckin' watch

where you're goin'.

- Fuckin' faggot.

- Hey, not out here, man.

Alan!

Bring champagne.

I can't believe

he said that you.

What's going on?

Some punks are swinging

bats at everyone.

- They got some guy cornered.

- Call the cops.

They're beatin' on fags!

You think the cops give a shit?

Call the cops! Now!

Over there.

Hey!

Give me the bat.

'Let him go.'

Come on. I said, "let him go."

Oh, geez.

'Come on. Give it back.'

Move it back.

'Hey, you back there,

get back in the car.'

I don't know what happened.

You'll read about it

in the morning. Come on.

Alright, break it up.

'Stop it!'

Stop it!

Please, stop it!

Stop!

I've called your mothers

and I don't want a sound

out of either one of you

until they get here.

Your mother?

Hey, I didn't say nothing, lady.

You are going to pay

for this, young man.

How could you get into

a fight today of all days.

Believe me young man.

I won't soon forget about this.

Yeah, you think I'll ever forget

you showin' up in that outfit?

They called and told me you

were hurt in a fight.

What did you want me

to do, put on a tux?

Looks like he survived.

What are you doing

home from work?

Brooklyn Day.

My school's closed.

What died in here?

It's breakfast,

I cooked it myself.

- Toast for me I'm on a diet.

- Since when?

1961.

Got a steak

I could put on my eye?

Use ice cubes.

When I think of that

kid hittin' you..

And for that he gets

two days suspension.

I gotta go see his principal.

What did you fight about anyway?

He called me a douchebag.

So, I slugged him.

- How '50s.

- Have a seat. Soup's on.

Here we go. Hm.

Okay, dig in.

- This is a joke, right?

- I cooked. You'll eat.

I'm going apartment hunting this

afternoon. Care to join me?

Hey, what's the rush?

I like having you here.

Can I have the ketchup?

The couch and I

are not speaking.

It's only your 4th night.

You'll get used to it.

Can I have the mustard?

Is something wrong

with the food?

Not at all. Very tasty.

How about the mayo?

Hold the mayo.

Oh, yeah, your wife called

in the middle of the night.

I tried to wake you,

but you were out of it.

Oh, I guess I better call her.

'Help yourself to seconds.

There's plenty.'

And I was worried.

David, you finish

cleaning up your room?

'Oh, what do I gotta clean for?'

My mother, tomorrow,

coming here.

Lock the door and

tell her it's a closet.

She doesn't know about me,

why let her into my room.

- Who's on the phone?

- Ed.

Alright. Alright.

Yeah, um, yeah.

1:30 at Greenfields. Yep.

Okay. Bye-bye.

She give you a bad time, huh?

Four days of those calls

you'd think I'd start

getting used to them.

I don't know why

she always has to cry.

I mean, this separation

wasn't all my idea.

Ed! I don't want to hear

what you have to say.

'Cause believe me, you don't

want to hear what I have to say.

Well, I'd love to sit

around chewin' the fat

with you grown-up types,

but I got a life to live.

- Take a glass of milk.

- I had milk.

- Then go brush your teeth.

- Oh, ma!

Don't you "oh, ma" me. March.

And don't call me, ma

in front of my mother.

Having a good time, Leonora?

Oh, Ed, two favors.

My mother wants to go to

the cemetery tomorrow.

So have you got the number of

that car service that you use?

- Yeah, sure.

- And uh..

David's social worker

will be coming on Thursday

so could you stay

somewhere else?

Oh, I'm good enough for your

mother, but I'm not good enough

for David's social worker?

It has nothing to do

with being good enough.

It's just that Ms. Schnabel

frowns on casual cohabitation.

I've got enough to explain

without you on the couch.

Casual? We've known each

other for nine years.

Seven of which you spent

with another woman.

- But I'm sleeping on the couch.

- Ed!

Okay, maybe I should just

find a hotel room.

And leave me unprotected

at a time like this?

You know my mother isn't

exactly going to feature

the idea of my

becoming a father.

Your opinion as an American

educator will prove invaluable.

She'll say I'm prejudiced.

She'll say a lot a things,

you'll learn not to listen.

- David, I'm leaving.

- I'll miss you.

Make sure he calls somebody

for his homework.

No TV till it's done.

And bedtime 11:00 p.m. sharp.

- But I got no school tomorrow.

- It's still a school night.

We'll be fine.

David!

Get over here!

What the hell is wrong with you?

I don't get no kiss goodbye?

- I love you.

- I love you too... ma!

So the new career is a reality.

Just don't forget who

your friends are.

You know, when I started,

in this business

I looked like

a young Joan Crawford.

Ten years later, Marjorie Main.

I swear I'm aging about as well

as a beach party movie.

Mmm, I'm happy for you.

You've got it all.

Now, if that idiot Ed

would just settle down..

You must be dying for a slap.

That's the last thing I need.

That's precisely my point. Ed

is the very last thing you need.

You've got the rest.

Nice apartment, good job

money enough to keep your figure

and someone who depends on you.

Now what you need is someone

on whom you can depend.

- Ed? Get real.

- People change.

Alan died, honey, not you.

How Alice Faye can I get?

'It's 7:18 in the Big Apple.'

'This is High Tide

with a dedication'

'from Butchie to Judy.'

Think we should wake him?

What if he oversleeps?

- I'm not gonna survive!

- He's up.

David, What are you doing

in that kitchen?

I cleaned until

5:00 in the morning!

- Where am I supposed to eat?

- You ever hear of a restaurant.

They cook and clean for you

and my mother don't go there.

Well, lemme break

the good news to her.

The suit should help

soften the blow.

- It's for David's Principal.

- What, no bunny slippers?

Ed, the phone number of that

car service you promised?

- Here. When do you expect her?

- I don't know.

She said early flight.

I figure around noon.

David! Get over here.

Now, listen to me. I want you

to cleanup that kitchen.

Get your butt over to Murray's.

And don't come home

until I call you, huh?

Yeah, ma.

What?

After all this time, why have

you not told her about David?

I told my mother, but she

assumed he was my roommate.

I didn't bother to correct her.

I was crazy then.

Alan had just died.

I never told her

how he was killed.

She assumed it was

a car accident.

- I didn't correct her.

- Unbelievable.

What's unbelievable?

You still haven't told your

parents you're gay.

Bisexual. Thank you.

I told my mother when I was 13.

- You knew when you were 13?

- At 13, I knew everything.

Senility set in sometime after.

'Hello, Murray? Hi.'

Listen, I won't be

coming over today, man.

I got a temperature. And, um..

...Arnold told me

to stay here in bed.

Yeah. Oh, it's terrible.

At least 102.

I got to go, Murray.

I'm very weak. Bye.

- Is this a playground?

- Yeah.

Thank you.

Was a pleasure meeting you all.

Not one who gave me a seat.

Thanks to you, gentlemen,

I now have varicose veins.

Wait, I got it.

- Hey!

- What?

- Help! Mugger!

- What? I'm not a mugger.

You're a rapist..

Would a rapist wear

a three-piece suit? Ouch.

How do I know? Maybe

you got a wedding after.

No, listen, Arnold

had to go somewhere.

So I waited for you, incase

you got here before him.

Oh. I'm sorry I kicked you.

This is very, very nice

of you to meet me.

No sweat.

I see Arnold left you his keys.

- I got my own set.

- Oh, really?

This is probably

none of my business

and I hope you don't

mind my asking.

- Just who the hell are you?

- I'm David.

- David. The neighbor's kid?

- I live with Arnold.

- Would you like a drink?

- Maybe later.

Come on in.

We've got everything

all worked out for you

even with Ed staying here.

- Ed?

- Arnold's friend.

Friend friend or

euphemism friend?

He used to be a euphemism.

Now he's just a friend.

But with you stayin' here

they'll both be sleeping

on the couch.

Who knows?

- Have they got water here?

- Sure.

We cleaned all week for you.

What do you think?

I think we should sit down.

Eh, David, tell me,

you go to school?

Yeah.

Hey, are these oranges

from Florida?

Cuba. We were hijacked.

But I'm not one to complain.

- Funny.

- Ha ha. Thanks.

So..

- You go to college?

- High school.

High school, how nice.

- Senior?

- Freshman.

Freshman.

That's very sweet.

Tell me, David,

just how old are you?

Sixteen!

In two months.

Something wrong?

Not at all.

Sixteen in two months.

That's wonderful.

You've got your life

ahead of you.

While mine is flashing

before my eyes.

- More water?

- More water.

David, darling..

Your parents, don't they

think you're a little young

to be out in the world

all alone?

No.

But juvenile court did.

So, here I am.

I need to talk to Arnold.

You could call the school, he

had to meet with my principal.

You mean real people

know you live here?

Why not? Lots of people

live with their fathers.

- Live with their what?

- Their fathers.

Hi, pop!

'So, mama tell me

all about Florida.'

Anyone special in your life?

Not particularly.

This Ed, he got married,

didn't he?

Right. So, how come

you're not seeing anyone?

Because the last thing

I need is to become nursemaid

to some alter kocker.

So how come he's

staying with you?

He and his wife are separated.

- Separated. How come?

- I don't know.

Arnold, the man is

living with you.

- He stayed on the couch.

- So are you.

- 'Cause your in my room.'

- 'You're involved.'

Ma!

You must admit it

sounds a little queer.

A man leaves his wife and

moves in with his old friend.

I don't think the people who

gave you David would approve.

You wanna just drive.

You've taken on a tremendous

responsibility with this boy.

You have to set him

a good example.

Giving a friend a place

to stay is a bad example?

I knew I should have kept

my mouth to myself.

Anyway, it's only

for a few more weeks.

What's for a few more weeks?

You said he was with you

on a one year basis.

So, it's already

more than 10 months.

So, what do you

think happens then?

- He leaves.

- No, ma. You misunderstood.

Yes, David's with me on

a one year trial basis

but after that if we agree and

Bureau Of Child Welfare allows

I'm going to legally adopt him.

Believe me, ma, if I have

anything to say about it.

- David's not leaving.

- Stop the car.

Frankly, you've

done crazy things...

Adopting David is

not a crazy thing.

It is a wonderful thing.

I happen to be very proud of.

If your so proud, how come

you're ashamed to tell me.

Everything else you tell me.

You shove your sex

life down my throat.

Every hour on the hour.

But all this time,

not a word. Why?

Your not an easy person

to talk to.

Why? Do I tell you

how to run your life?

Listen to me, my son,

I realized a long time ago

that no matter what

I thought or how I felt

you and your brother were

gonna do exactly as you felt.

You want to know why

you didn't tell me?

- Because you knew it was wrong.

- That is not true.

No? Why?

I don't know.

So what else is new?

That's it. Honestly, I've had it

up to here with you.

Your father left these plots to

you, this is what you want to do

with them, fine.

That's your business.

I will not stand here and watch

you spit on your father's grave!

- What?

- What you think you're doing?

- What do you...

- What are you doing?

I'm doing the same

thing you're doing.

No! I'm reciting Kaddish

for my husband.

You're blaspheming

your religion.

You know who this is?

This is my lover.

Wait. Wait. Wait.

You're gonna compare my

marriage to you and Alan?

Your father and I were

married for 35 years

we'd two children together, you

dare compare yourself to that?

- I'm talking about the loss.

- What loss did you have?

You fooled around with some boy.

Where do you come to compare

with a marriage of 35 years?

Come on, Arnold. This isn't one

of your pals you're talking to.

I lost someone

I loved very much.

So you felt bad. Maybe

you even cried a little.

What would you know what I felt?

35 years I lived with this man.

He got sick, I took him

to the hospital.

You know what they gave me back?

I gave them a man.

They gave me a place

to visit on holy days.

How could you possibly

know how I felt?

It took two months before I

could sleep in our bed alone.

And a year, it took me a year

before I could say,

I instead of we.

And you're gonna tell me

you are mourning.

How dare you!

You're right, ma. How dare I?

I couldn't possibly know how it

feels to take somebody's things

put it in plastic bags and watch

garbage men take 'em away.

Or how it feels when you forget

and you set him his place

at the table.

How about the food that rots

in the refrigerator

'cause you forgot how

to shop for one.

How dare I, right, ma?

How dare I?

Believe me, ma, you had it easy.

You had 35 years together, ma.

You have friends,

you have relatives.

You know who I had? I had me.

You know what my friend said?

What the fuck are you

carrying on about?

At least you had a lover.

That's right. You had it easy.

You lost your husband in

a nice, clean hospital.

You know where I lost mine?

On the street.

That's right. They killed him

on the street.

Twenty seven years old,

laying dead on the street.

Killed by a bunch of kids

with baseball bats.

That's right, ma.

Killed by children.

Children taught

by people like you

'cause everybody knows

that queers don't matter.

Queers don't love!

And those that do,

deserve what they get.

Taxi!

'Action!'

I'll get it.

You must be Ed.

How do you do? I'm the mother.

Nice to have met you.

Whoops.

Whoops?

Ed, did you say "whoops?"

No, Ed.

Whoops is when you fall down

an elevator shaft.

Whoops is when you skinny dip

in a school of piranha.

Whoops is when you accidentally

douche with Drano.

'No, Ed.'

This was no whoops.

This was an argh.

Come on, David.

We're dining out.

Good idea.

Good Luck.

Round Two.

Mama.

You can come out now. We got

the whole joint to fight in.

'Enjoy yourself.

I'm going to bed.'

Ma, I'm sorry I lost my temper.

'I'm glad you're sorry.'

Mama, we've gotta

talk about this.

You don't wanna talk,

you want to fight.

I don't fight with my children.

Did you ever hear your

father and me fight?

No. And you wanna know why?

Because all my childhood

I listened to fights.

My father fought with my mother.

Mother fought with my brother.

Brother fought with me.

When I married I said, "Jack,

I will talk, but won't fight."

Did you ever hear us fight? No!

And now you know why.

And don't holler.

People say things they don't

mean when they holler

and you've said quite enough.

I won't holler. You just

hit a wrong nerve before.

We will not discuss

Alan or daddy.

Only David.

Arnold, darling, what do you

know from raising a child?

What's to know? Whenever

there's a problem

I simply imagine how

you would solve it.

And then I do the opposite.

That's what you invited

me here for to insult me

and spit on your father's grave?

Oh, ma. God.

Arnold, you live your life

the way you want.

I put my fist in my mouth,

I don't say a word.

But think about the boy.

He sees you living like this.

'Don't you think it's

bound to affect him?'

Ma, David is gay.

He's been here less than a year.

He came that way.

Nobody comes that way.

What an opening.

Everything by you is a joke.

The world has

gone completely insane

and I'm heading

south for summer.

You make it difficult to have

an intelligent conversation.

You want an intelligent

conversation? Do what I do.

Talk to yourself.

It's the only way.

Don't you understand the whole

reason David was placed here

so that he grows with a positive

attitude of his homosexuality.

Arnold, gay gives into hate.

I don't care anymore.

You're not gonna put me in

my grave like your father.

- Now I killed my father.

- No, of course not.

He was thrilled to have

a fairy for a son.

You walk into a room and say

"Hi, dad. I'm queer."

And that's that? Is that why we

brought you into the world for?

Believe me, if I had known

I wouldn't have bothered.

God should tear out my tongue

I should talk to

my child like that.

Arnold, you're a good person.

A sensitive person with a heart

kinda like your father.

I try to love you and forget

this, but you won't let me.

You haven't spoken one sentence

without the word gay in it.

'Cause it's what I am.

If that's all, leave it

in there where it belongs.

But you're obsessed with it.

You're not happy unless

everybody's talking about it.

Try and imagine the world

the other way around.

Imagine that every book,

every magazine, every TV show

every movie, was telling you,

you should be homosexual.

You know you're not.

You know to you this is...

Stop already.

You're talking crazy.

You wanna know what's crazy?

After all these years,

I'm still sitting here

trying to justify my life.

This is crazy.

You call this a life?

This is a sickness.

But it's what you've

chosen for yourself.

Ma, look, I'm gay.

I don't know why.

I don't think anyone does.

That's what I am.

Far as I can remember

before I knew it was different

or even wrong...

You have not heard

one word I've said.

I know you'd rather

I was straight. I'm not.

'Would you also rather

I'd lied to you?'

My friend, Ed would never dream

of telling his parents.

Instead he cut his parents

out of his life.

And his parents wonder why.

Why is my child so distant?

- Is that what you rather?

- No.

But it doesn't have to be our

every conversation either.

You wanna be a part of my life

I'm not editing out

the things you don't like.

- Can we end this conversation?

- No!

God..

There's one more thing you

better understand.

I've taught myself to sew, cook,

fix plumbing, build furniture

I can even pat myself

on the back when necessary.

All so I don't have to ask

anyone for anything.

There's nothing I need

from anyone

except for love and respect.

And anyone who can't give me

those two things

has no place in my life.

You're my mother.

'I love you.'

I do, but..

If you can't respect me, you've

got no business being here.

- You're throwing me out?

- Ma, I'm trying to...

Throwing me out.

Isn't that nice?

Listen, mister.

You get one mother in

this world. Only one.

Wait. You just wait.

- 'Yeah, hello.'

- Ed, it's Murray.

- Is Arnold there?

- Well, isn't he at work?

'He ran outta here

after the first show'

'and he never came back.

Where would he go?'

Where you going, boys?

I just got here.

Hello, boys.

Line forms to the left.

- Arnold, come on.

- What?

Say goodnight to your friends.

- Come on, we're going home.

- I had you.

I don't want to go home.

She's there.

Spring and Thomson.

Your mother said she's leaving.

She didn't want

to stay the night

but she couldn't get

a flight out till morning.

She was gonna spend

the night at the airport

but I got her calmed down.

She'd stay, if you asked her.

Why did you get drunk?

Hello? Anybody home?

Sometimes you really

frighten me, Ed.

You care to talk about it, huh?

I am upset. I am uptight.

I am up to my nipples

in southern comfort.

And you're trying to

take advantage of me.

Fine.

I want another chance with you.

Arnold, please listen to me.

Look, Arnold. I'm 40 years old.

You know what

that means, Arnold?

It means it's time for me

to stop jerking around.

The time I've spent

with you and David

it's been... the closest thing

to whatever it is I want.

Are you listening to me?

$2.25

Thanks.

Look, I know you're upset

about your mother.

That's not it.

Then maybe it's

too soon after Alan.

- Ed, leave me alone.

- But then what?

Ed, are you forgetting why we

broke up in the first place?

You really think that you could

bring your friends here?

You think that you could

introduce me to your parents

as your lover,

and David as our son?

Ed.

Angel, I just threw my mother,

my mother, out of the house.

All she wanted was

not talk about it.

'You really think I'm going

to ask less from you?'

'We've got a dedication now'

'from Beulah to Michael.'

'Thinking of you.'

I ever tell you about the time

that Alan called in

one of these shows?

You told me.

And how they read

the dedication wrong?

You told me.

Oh, it was so romantic.

You told me.

Come on, champ.

Breakfast's on me.

Do we ever get to have

a real meal again?

Oh, let's go.

Wait up, then. I've got

to do something first.

Listen, um..

What we talked about last night.

I think it's time to find out.

I love you, Arnold.

Ahem, Um.. David are you coming?

In a minute!

It was a pleasure meeting you,

Mrs. Beckoff.

Pleasure was mine, Ed.

I hope you and your wife

come to your senses.

Couples have to learn

to live with conflict.

After all, a problem is never

as permanent as a solution.

Thank You.

David.

Well, young man,

it's been an experience.

Same here.

Sorry, I scared you yesterday.

Maybe someday I can

do the same for you.

I'll be leaving myself now.

Ma, you don't have to go.

You can stay.

What? With your brother?

No. It's better he doesn't know.

I'll call him from Miami, tell

him I couldn't come this week.

No, I'll call him and I'm gonna

tell him what happened.

You want to turn him

against me too?

What else do you wanna do? You

want me to leave? I'm leaving.

You want me to fight?

I'm too tired.

You want me to change?

I'm too old. I can't.

So, you do what you have to do.

And I'll do what I have to do.

- And I hope you're satisfied.

- Oh, God.

If I had opened a mouth to my

mother the way you did to me

you'd be talking to a woman

with a size six wedgie

sticking out of her forehead.

'I didn't raise

my children like that.'

I wanted my children to respect

me because they wanted to.

Not because I beat it into them.

We're going to start this

all over again?

Yes! Because it's not fair

to put all the blame on me.

You think I didn't know about

you? Believe me, I knew, I knew.

But I said, no. I hoped.

What's the difference?

I knew when I turned my back.

But I wasn't the only one,

you turned your back on me too.

You opened a mouth to me

about your friend, Alan.

How was I supposed to know?

All of a sudden,

you would have understood?

Maybe, you don't know. You never

trusted me enough to tell me.

- You never said a word.

- So you could have said what?

"Ah, he's better

off dead," right?

Maybe I could have comforted

you, told you what to expect.

You cheated me out of your life

and then blamed me

for not being there.

About this Ed..

...you love him?

I don't know.

Yeah, I think so.

Like you loved Alan?

No.

They're very different.

Anyway, it's easier to love

someone who's dead.

'They make so few mistakes.'

You've got an unusual way of

looking at things, Arnold.

I think it runs in the family.

Ma..

I miss him.

Give yourself time, Arnold.

It gets better.

But, Arnold, it never goes away.

You can work longer hours

adopt a son, fight with me,

whatever. It'll still be there.

But that's alright,

it becomes a part of you

like learning to wear a ring

or a pair of eye glasses.

You get used to it

and it's good.

It's good because it makes

sure you don't forget.

You don't want to

forget him, do you?

No.

So it's good.

You'd better get that.

It might be something

about that son of yours.

Hello.

Oh, hi, Dav... what?

Alright. Yes, I'm turning.

Alright. I'm turning.

It's David.

Something about the radio.

'Turn it on. Turn it on.'

'No, I just checked with my

producer who took the call'

'he has confirmed. For whatever

it's worth, here it is.'

'A dedication from David to

Arnold. With all his love.'

You hear that, ma?

Stupid kid.

Oh, God, mama,

He's such a special..

Ma, You're not even listening.

Mama.

Torch Song Trilogy (1988) - full transcript