To Be Someone (2020) - full transcript

♪ You can see
I've got my eye on you

♪ You caught me staring
at your every move

♪ You're just a...

Yes, that's right.
It's another show called

Funny with the Money.

Have you got what it takes...

♪ You dragged me out...

I don't see why
we should put up with it,

Because it's only
for an hour or so,

and it's not worth
falling out with him.

He's a nice lad, Danny is.



He's an immature prat,
that's what he is.

♪ That's the blood
draining from my face...

♪ When...

Right. That's it.

Turn it down please, girls.

I'll get him.

Who was at the door?

It's Albert, he wants dad.

Well, there's a surprise.

So you enjoyed
the school holidays?

Yeah. It's been great.
We've been to the zoo.

The beach a few times,
and stayed at nanny's,

and made cakes
and done lots of nice things.

You're going up into seniors
when you get back aren't you?



Yes.

Looking forward to it?

No. I had to get shit loads
of homework.

What'd you say?

Dad?

Albert wants you.

Does he? What does he want?

Dad said, what d'you want?

Tell him to turn it down a bit.

Wants you to turn it down a bit.

Does he now?

You tell him...

Daddy said "bollocks."

Hey, I was listening to that.

So was half the street.

Put on something
that we all like.

Do you want another coffee?

Yes. Yes, I do.
Thank you.

What time the boys coming round?

They are coming around...
Shit, I'm already late.

You have been getting ready
for the past three hours.

Yeah, well, I'm Danny the Face.

I gotta look good
at me own club, no?

Don't get too pissed. You know what
you're like when you've had a few... 90

I'm going to see a new band.

I might even be back early.

Well, I might wait up
for you then.

Maybe I won't go then.

Go on.

Life ain't too shabby
at the moment.

You know, when I was younger,
I always thought I was gonna be

like a footballer
or a music star

or a nightclub owner
like the old man.

Childhood dreams, eh?

Fact of the matter is, everyone in
this world wants to be a somebody.

But most of us are nobodies.

I reckon there are two types
of nobodies.

Prodders like the road sweep.

Jammy bastards
that can do no wrong.

You know, the sort that if
they fell into a bucket of shit,

they'd come out smelling
like roses.

And then the unlucky sods
like me.

I promise you, if I fell
into a bucket of tits,

I'd come out sucking me thumb.

Home now.

There is a glimmer
of hope for a nobody.

I mean, you can keep living

a life of mundane shit
if you like,

or you can fight.

You can pull yourself
out of defecation.

Grab, strike, steal,
beg, borrow.

Just get yourself up
to the top of the tree

because that's where
the somebodies are.

I hear you're getting out
tomorrow, Nick.

You lucky bastard.

What you talking about lucky?

How old are you, son?

- Eighteen.
- Fuck! You know...

You was a baby the first time
I stepped in here.

Yeah, I'm a lucky bastard,
ain't I?

Good luck, Nick,
don't get caught next time.

Fuck you.

Double 20.

- Bullseye.
- Boss.

You made me miss my shot.

Get in front of that dartboard!

Which eye do you want
to lose first?

Boss, It's Nick.
Ginger Nick's out.

Is that, right?

Well, you better take
Baldy Bollocks here

and go and get him then,
wouldn't ya?

Hey, you owe me a tenner
I won that last game.

Bollocks.

He put me off.

You go and you bring
that little muck back here.

Now piss off!

All right, bob.

Oi, you!

- Morning, Albert.
- You and your bloody music.

If that's what you call it,
might crack down my wall.

Albert, I play my music
once a week on a Friday

at eight o'clock,
I think you can waive it.

And that gang of ruffians
you hang around with on bikes,

their engine vibrations
made my ass upside.

Look, Danny, hey,
just take a look at yourself.

The way you're dressed,
your bloody bike.

You're not a teenager anymore.

Why can't you just grow up
and be more like...

What?

Well, like me.

Albert, if growing up means
being a miserable old git like you.

I think I'll stay as I am.
Thanks. Ta-da.

You, dickhead.

What's happening Ken?

- What up, boss?
- How's it going, Dan?

- All right mate.
- I ain't seen you in ages.

What brings you down here?

Scooter was running
a little bit lumpy, innit?

You're gonna have a
look it for me, would ya?

Yeah, no problem.

Do you want a cuppa?
We'll catch up.

Yeah, okay, yeah.

I'll sort it out then. It's
probably just a dirty plug.

- Cheers, Steve.
- All right.

How's Tommy and Bunny then, Ken?

Still up to their old tricks.

She pops her head in
occasionally.

Well, what I wouldn't give
to spend a night with her.

I'll show her a thing or two.

Oh, Bunny?
She'll eat you alive, mate.

They behave themselves upstairs?

I ain't saying nothing.

They are not here again today?

I'll pop me head in
and check then, shall I?

Well, if you ain't back in four
hours, I'll send the troops in.

You're about to meet Tommy.

Tommy's my dad's old best mate.

Tommy lives with Bunny.

The pair of them are your real

sex, drugs, rock and roll types.

And they...

And years ago they turned
their passion into a business.

They've never looked back.

Hello, Dan-O.

It's a bit early, innit?
I just got out of bed.

A bit early?

It's half ten in the morning,
you lazy git!

Who's that?

- Who?
- "Who?"

Her, with legs
up to her armpits.

Oh, well, well, that was Sarah.

She's... Bunny's...

She's having a bit
of boyfriend trouble.

You let me in there?

Yeah.

Oh, golden fannies,
Tommy, what's going on here?

...speaking,
how can I help you?

What... Mum,
what are you doing here?

Calm down, son.

I've just been doing a bit
part time on the phones.

And I've been doing it for ages.

Anyway, what's it got
to do to you?

Dan, it's not how it looks.
Let me explain.

Please don't tell me you're running
a knocking shop out of my gaff.

Ah, Dan, this is Daniella.

- Oh, you are now?
- Pour a drink?

No. Funny enough, Tommy,

a knocking shop contravenes
my lease agreement on this place.

I gave you a good price 'cause I
though you wanted somewhere to live.

It's no big deal, Danny.

There's nothing dodgy
going on here?

Full service, yes.

We're just using this place
as a base.

I've started this visiting
massage agency,

it's Tommy's Tickles, and, uh...

Well, the girls and the drivers

just chill out here
waiting for a job.

Tommy, Anal Arnie

wants a word with you
on the phone.

He's got a complaint about
one of the girls we sent him.

She shat on his satin sheets.

Look, give me
ten minutes, erm...

Why don't you give Daniella
a game of pool?

You won't win, but, er,

I think you might
enjoy yourself.

Arnie, how are ya?

Now, don't worry
just send me the laundry bill.

We each break,
or shall I toss for it?

No, no, you can play.

You know what? I concede.

- What?
- Let's, um, do something else.

Do you do anything else
other than pool?

I sing a bit.

Go on then.

If you're any good, I'll
give you a slot at the club.

♪ Come and put your hands
in the feelybooth

♪ Feelybooth

♪ Feelybooth

♪ Come and put your hands
in the feelybooth

♪ The mysteries will unfold

♪ There are people
who move rockets

♪ With the money
in their pockets

♪ And the people who
make rockets and they begat

♪ The children of the few who

♪ Who were born
with silver spoons

♪ Who tell me count balloons

♪ Hermit of rockets

♪ La, la, la, la

♪ La, la, la, la

♪ Come and put your hands
in the feelybooth

♪ Feelybooth

♪ Feelybooth

♪ Come and put your hands
in the feelybooth

♪ The mysteries will unfold

♪ There are people
who make rockets

♪ With the money
in their pockets

♪ And the people who
make rockets and they begat

♪ The children of the few who

♪ Who were born
with silver spoons

♪ Who would tell me
count balloons

♪ Hermit of rockets ♪

You day dreaming again?

I told you she wasn't bad.

I'm starving. Come on,
let me buy you breakfast.

All right.

Get my number off Tommy,
You're bang on.

Okay, there you go, lads.

- Cheers, love.
- Thanks.

That place still works.
Look I mean it.

Hmm.

How about you?
Is there any money in that

traveling masseuse business?

'Course there is. We were making
a fortune until Mike got involved.

Not Mad Mike.

How on Earth did you
get involved with him?

Well, he found out
we were doing well.

Then he forced us to move coke

through the girls
to their clients.

Oh. For God's sake.

I didn't have a choice.
Mike sucked us in. Oh, yeah.

He was all nice at the start.

He offered protection
to the girls,

and he even gave his credit
on the first few batches.

Oh, yeah?
And then what?

Quantities got
bigger and bigger.

He forced the gear on us, and...

I got into debt when a
deal went wrong and...

- Now he's a partner.
- A partner?

Oh, my days, Tom! you really
are stupid, you know that?

I am lucky to be alive.

And I don't think
you can sit there

and lecture me
with your history.

- My history?
- You work with his son.

Oh leave off. Vinny's nothing
like him, you know that.

They're chalk and cheese,
they don't even get on.

Right. Here we go.

One of the UK's
most feared crime families,

go by name of the Warrens.

They're headed up
by three brothers.

The good: Old Jack.

A very odd, but fair bloke.

When it came to a business
deal, he was ruthless.

But he always
looked after his own.

Loyalty means everything to him.

Then there's the bad:
Mad Mike.

Mad Mike, he starts chucking.

I've seen him beat
the shit out of someone,

then for good measure, pull
their arms out of their socket.

He's one nasty bastard.

He's got a son, Vinny,

who helps me manage
the Punch Bowl, my night club.

He's a stand-up bloke,
and he wants nothing to do

with his old man's
gangster shit.

Eh? Piss off!

And then
there's the ugly: Stan.

Do another blow.

He was one party animal.

New pills on the market.

They are like blues with a buzz.

They're called buzz bombs.

Help yourself, girls.
Mm-mm.

Buzz bombs
were the latest craze then.

Sort of like what
ecstasy is today.

But back then,
it was new territory.

Some of the batch were taint.

Stan died that day
along with the girls.

Old Jack was devastated
at his brother's death.

Mad Mike didn't seem
to give a toss.

Just said, at least
he died happy.

Old Jack and Young Vinny never
forgave Mike for that comment.

In fact, they both despised him.

Why?

Mad Mike was the dealer.

Back in the day,
my old man spent

most of his time behind bars.

It all started with a three-year
stretch for drug dealing.

Truth be told,
all my dad was doing

was flogging his own
personal stash.

So he could get rid of it,
and make a clean start.

The bloke he's talking to
is Jack Warren.

Remember the good?

He was the daddy of the prison.

Dad was lucky they both
come from the same manner,

and Jack took him
under his wing.

So...

So, Dan, hear you'll be
leaving us soon.

A couple of weeks
I'll be out of here.

No more dealing, eh, Dan?

I've never dealt gear
in my life, Jack.

Wrong place wrong time
was a stitch up.

Good.

Glad to hear it.

Jack!

Remember the nobodies?

- Sarko ends up dead.
- Fuck!

Old Jack spends
a few days in hospital,

and dad gets another
five years for manslaughter.

Ladies and gentlemen,
all the way from Wharton

for you tonight.
It's the K's.

♪ Sarajevo

♪ Sarajevo

♪ And these all-out wars
War, war, war I feel it coming

♪ Sarajevo

♪ Sarajevo

♪ And these all-out wars
War, war, war I feel it coming

♪ I'm wrapped in your gaze,
and it's pretty scary...

My dad eventually
got out of prison.

Old Jack shows his appreciation
by helping him buy

into the Punch Bowl nightclub.

Now, dad tragically passed away.

But I took over,

and for the first time
in my life,

I finally felt like someone.

And nothing's going
to take that feeling away.

♪ Sarajevo

♪ Sarajevo

♪ And these all out wars
War, war, war I feel it coming

♪ Sarajevo

♪ Sarajevo

♪ And these all out wars
War, war, war I feel it coming

Look at him, he loves it.

Young Danny's doing well.

- Yeah.
- Maybe too well.

What do you mean?

I don't know.
I can't put my finger on it.

Your old man is taking
a lot of interest

in young Danny lately,
and you know what he's like.

Something wicked this way
comes, you mark my words.

No, no, we'll deal with that.

Our Roger is a fixer.

To you, that means,
he could pretty much

take a piece of shit and
turn into gold if he wanted to.

Big night tonight Dan.

- Happy?
- Yeah.

This was a shitty little boozer

when your old man bought it.

- Look at it now.
- Yeah.

Thanks to the great fire
of London, eh?

Cheers.

Cheers. To the great fire
of London.

Good day, fellas.

Roger hired dad as a partner
back in the day.

Roger then convinced the old man
that he needed to...

expand, refurbish the place.

Bring it up to speed,
if you will,

Now what dad didn't realize was,

in order to expand the place,

Roger was gonna
burn it down first.

Well, what's the insurance
for, Danny?

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

Cheers, boys.

Well, up in the North
of the country,

in Scotland...

Oh, God.

Hello, Nick.
It's been a while.

Somebody wants
a little chat with you.

Get dressed.

Now!

Wake up.

Nick, it's been a long time.

Yeah, a fucking lifetime.
Thanks to you, Mike.

Thanks for coming up and visit.

Well, I'm a busy man.

Oh, and thanks for the monthly
checks to my family.

Well, I would have looked
after them when you were inside.

That is, if you told me
where the stash was.

But you didn't, did you?

Because, oh, no.

Nicky boy, he's got
a fucking conscience.

You know as well as I know,

if I would have said anything
to you before I got released,

you would have
had me ironed out.

And why would I do that, Nick?

Because fucking 15 years
is a long time, Mike.

And you thought I'd flip
sooner or later.

So I had to get some
life insurance.

So fuck you!

Na, na, na, na.

Don't get cheeky, because
you'll only make things worse.

Worse?

I lost my wife.

My kids.

Don't fucking laugh at me.

Half my fucking life
thanks to you.

Spare me the violin dramatics,
all right?

Now the police...

They only picked up
half that stash.

So I've got one pertinent
question for you, Nicky boy.

Where's my fucking gear?

It was bad fucking shit, Mike.

Them blues was killing people.

- Kids!
- Is that right?

Yeah. it was right,
you sick bastard.

One bad pill.

Well, if the kids
don't like them,

they shouldn't play Russian
roulette then, should they?

Like I said before,

the old blue only recovered
half of that stash.

So somewhere out there,
floating around

is five million buzz bombs
unaccounted for.

That's a lot
of fucking money, son.

You do the maths.

That's one, two,
three, four, five.

Five million buzz bombs at
five pound a ton I would say.

Don't you ever fucking listen?

It was killing people!

Where is my £25 million
of buzz bombs

you fucking shite?

Eh? Where are they?

Wake up!

Nutters, get me me saw.
I'm gonna chop his arm off.

Would say, like,
electric or manual?

What did I use the last time?

Uh, petrol chain saw.

Petrol? Ah, na, na, na. You
gotta think about environment,

greenhouse gases.
Give me the manual.

What one first, Nicky boy?

- Your wanking arm?
- Whoa, whoa! Hold up.

All right. Okay, okay, okay.

- Okay.
- Eh...

We're getting somewhere now,
aren't we?

Do you know where my gear is?

Yes.

Well, it's easy then, innit?

You go and you get me my gear

and I don't chop
your fucking arm.

I can't.

Can't means won't,
won't means can't.

I can't! Have a look
out the window.

There should be a silver Ford.

It's Old Bill, they've been
watching me like a hawk.

He's right, boss.
There's two of them in it.

They've been on me
ever since I've got out.

I'll tell you
where your shit is,

but I ain't gonna get it.

They followed you? Eh?

You've brought
the Old Bill onto me,

and I can't even kill you now.

I tell you what,
you've spoiled my night.

I'll tell you something, Mike.
If anything happens to me,

I've left a letter
that tells all, I swear.

You'll have to get
some other muck

to go and get the gear for ya.

♪ Do you ever wonder
how far you go

♪ Before your heart packs in
before you no longer know

♪ How to breathe right

♪ Keep looking at me,
we'll be alright

♪ Don't ask the question
if you don't...

I would be scared doing
what you're doing.

There are some weird punters
out there, Linda, I'm telling you.

Tell her about the burper.

Oh, God, he's a weirdo.

- Made my skin crawl.
- Who?

This geezer, right.
He pays good money.

I mean, top dollar.

Thing is, he's a right pervert.

But it's money
for our rope, really.

He gets you to drink a bottle of
Coke as fast as you can, right?

Then, all he wants you to do

is stand in front of him burping

while he tosses himself off.

Okay!

You are winding me up.

Hey, what about that bloke
from Hemel?

Bollock chops.

I couldn't believe it when
Daniella told me,

so I went with her last week
to witness it for myself.

Who's a bad boy then?

I am.

I'm a bad, bad boy.

And what happens to bad boys?

Punishment.

Thank you so much.

Jesus, and he pays for that?

I couldn't think of anything
worse than a good kick to the nuts.

Well, mind you, I felt like
doing it to Danny a few times.

Oh, I can imagine. He could
be a right little prick sometimes.

Oh, yeah? What's this then?

We were just talking about
bollock chops.

Now did Bunny tell you
what happened on Monday night?

I was short of drivers,

I asked Ken take Daniella
to an appointment.

- Oh, listen to this.
- Go on.

Daniella walks out to the car,

and says to Ken, "Do you
wanna earn an easy 200 quid?"

Ken being the pervy git
that he is says...

So what you want me to do then?

Nothing much.
All he wants

is you to watch me
give him a blowjob.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

Really?

I'll give him £200 for that.

That ain't bad for 200 quid.

The trouble was,
while Daniella was busy

blowing him off,
the dirty git wanted

Ken to tickle his nuts.

It's still not the end
of the world for me.

With his tongue.

That was so bad!

I gotta ask, did he do it?

I'm not saying.

♪ Got a feelin'
you've explained it

♪ Baby, tell me

♪ Got a feelin'
you've explained it...

Yeah.

Bring that muck Danny in,
I want a word.

And I want it now!
And bring him around the back.

Yeah, no problem I hope.

Nah, not as we speak, no.

Bring him now.

♪ By the time the sun shines

We've got a problem.

♪ And the tiny stars are like
insects are with six legs each

Two seconds.

Listen, I've got to nip out
for a minute,

but I'll be back, all right?
See you later.

Come on.

Hey, Vinny, what's your old
man want with me anyway?

I don't know, mate. But
he doesn't sound too happy.

You don't even see eye-to-eye
with your old man, do you?

Can't stand
the psychopathic bastard.

And he knows it. That's
why I let Roger deal with him.

Ah, you know, I've got
a bad feeling about this.

I've never had any dealings
with your old man.

- What's he want me now for?
- You know, mate,

I don't know, all right?

He just said he wants
a word with ya. That's it.

Okay?

Relax. You'll be all right.

Yeah, I'll just relax.

It'd be great.

We're just off to see Mad Mike
for no apparent reason.

I'll just chill out.

♪ Me and you
create a hullabaloo

♪ Until the farmer
gets his gun

Ah... Danny! Eh.

And my ungrateful offspring.

Come in, lads. Danny, take
a seat down here next to me.

Young Danny.

Who the fuck are you?

Nick Ronson.

I'm a mate of your old man's.

- Ginger Nick.
- Ah!

I'm glad you're pleased
to see each other.

Because you're all gonna be
working for me together,

Doing what?

Did your old man ever tell you

about my drug deal way back?

Went tits up.
Lost all me stash.

- Yeah.
- Well, Nicky here

is gonna tell me
where it's hidden.

What's that got to do with me?

But we have a problem.

And a problem shared
is a problem halved.

You see, Nick would gladly
go and get it for me.

But since he's got out,

he's got,
what can only be described

as a permanent fucking shadow.

Can't even have a fucking wank

without the Old Bill
knowing about it.

So you're gonna go and
get it for me instead, Danny.

At my bollocks.

Why can't you get it?

Shut your mouth.

Why can't you?

Silly bollocks, Ginger Nick had
brought the Old Bill on us that's why?

Well, that's your problem. I ain't
getting involved with drugs, Mike.

Oh, yes, you are.

You owe me.

How'd you work that out?

So you haven't told him then eh?

Told me what? Rog?

- Sorry, Danny.
- Sorry, Danny.

Sorry, Danny!
You fucking muck!

You thought you were partners
with Roger, didn't ya?

But you slipped up.

Because Roger works for me.

So I'm your partner,

And as he owns
51% controlling interest

for services rendered,

I'm the control, and he's fired.

You're winding me up.

I don't do wind ups.

Come on, Dad.

I mean, what's brought this
on all of a sudden, huh?

That's always dad, innit?
It's always dad.

Every time you want something,
you little shit.

- Yeah, but why him?
- Shut up.

That club is mine,

pure and simple.

Well, I ain't risking
ten years of my life

picking up your drugs.

All right, Mike? So, you do
what you're gonna do.

Yeah, Fuck that.
Come on, Dan, let's go.

Right. Let's all calm down.

We're getting
a little bit excited.

This is what's
gonna happen, all right?

Dan, you love
the Punch Bowl right?

- I think you know I do. Yes.
- It's gone. After tonight,

you won't even get in
there as a paying customer.

You are one evil bastard,
you know that?

I take that as a compliment.

Look, mate.

I'm not unfair.
I'll tell you what I'll do.

You go, you get me my pills.

You bring them back,

and I'll sign the club over.

Let me make it crystal clear.

You muck this up,

and I'll do you,

your wife... and your kids.

See?

You're half way there.

You and a few of your mates,
you go, you get my gear.

Wham, bam! Debt paid.

Club signed over,

no kiddies die.

And everybody's happy.
And the band plays,

and all the confetti falls.

I ain't got much choice, have I?

Nah, you haven't, son.

And do me a favor.

Take Nick out of here
because he's dripping claret

all over my brand new
laminate flooring.

♪ Hold on

♪ Hold on

♪ Hold on to what you got

I would take losing the club.

I can't lose my family, Vinny.

This is out of control, Dan.

But seriously,
he's a fucking animal.

I bet he wouldn't think twice
about doing me and all.

He got me cornered, ain't he?

I can't be putting
my family at risk.

Can we go swimming today, Mom?

I can't, baby,
I'm meeting a friend.

But ask your dad.

Can we go somewhere today,
Dad, I'm bord.

You got your new bike.
What are we buying bikes for,

if they never ride 'em?
Go on, then.

But we want to go swimming.

Go to your Nan's. Period!

So what's wrong with you?

Nothing.

Well go on.

All right.

Me and Vinny had to go
to Mad Mike's last night.

And?

And...

turns out, Roger was never
me old man's partner.

He's never been mine.

Mad Mike is.

- What?
- Yeah.

And now he's threatening me.

Now I gotta get down
the Isle of Wight

and pick up his drugs,

and bring them back,
or he takes the club.

- You serious?
- Yeah, I am serious.

Give him the fucking club.

We've got the bike shop,
think of your family.

Think of my family?
What do you think I'm doing?

Why do you think we've got the
bike shop and the club and all this?

- Are you mental?
- No, I'm not mental.

I just don't have
any control over,

it's Mad Mike, you know that.

Fuck's sake!
I'll deal with it!

I'll see you later.

Are you sure?

Yeah.

I can't be intimidated to
put my liberty on the line.

I can't let my family.

Fuck him anyways.
He's a bully.

Oh, yeah. We all know that

Yeah. Do you know
the word grass

was invented by crooks
to intimidate good people?

A stigma to stop them
asking for help.

I'll back whatever decision
you make, mate.

Yes.

Cheers, Vinny.

Hello, I think
we need a little chat.

Yeah, Tell me about it.

I read your statement.

Lucky I got to it first

before one of my colleagues
got to it.

So you'll help us then?

Do you know
who you're dealing with?

Yeah. That's why we're here.

Well, then you've got to know,
if you go through with it,

you've got to be mad.

Sorry, what?

Mike Warren happens to be
a very good friend of mine.

And, quite frankly,
I think the allegations

you're making against him
are outrageous.

Outrageous? He's threatened
my family, eh?

You should take his offer.

Hang on, I never said
he made an offer,

I said he made a threat.

Yeah, well, here's my threat.

You do as he says,
you get his gear back,

or you'll have me
on your back. You get me?

You bastards!

Yeah, That's right.

If you don't play the game,
I'll just fit you up.

I will plant so much
fucking gear on you, belle,

you'll go away forever.
You get me?

Yeah. Yeah, you're filth.

You're being cockers, period.

Real dirty ones.

I let Mike know you're gonna
call him later, shall I?

How do you sleep at night?

Oh, quite well, actually.

You bastards!

Your brother's proper
stitch me up.

I know, Dan, I heard.

If you do that job for Mike,

you could go down for a
long time. You know that?

I need your help.

The old man said if I was ever in
trouble, I could come to you, so.

There's nothing I can do
to help you, son.

You've got to help yourself.

What?

Jack knows everything, Dan.

What do you mean?

Drugs, Dan, I hate them.

You've heard the story about my
younger brother, Stan, didn't ya?

Piece of it, yeah.

Stan was my mom's favorite,

but he was mucked up in the head

with all these pills
he was popping.

Yeah, that's shit life.

And I promised my mum
on her deathbed

I'd look after him.

The way he died,

it was tragic.

I felt I'd let my old mum down.

And that hurts, Dan.

I don't like drugs,

and I don't like the maggots
that deal in 'em.

My brother Mike.

I'm only here
because Jack arranged it.

Well, you know that
fucking Mike, he used force

to get the location
of where the gear is.

This is... this is all
part of the game.

We were gonna let his crew
pick up the stash,

deliver it to him
and grass the lot of them.

Simple.

Until his eyes turned to you.

Well, he's threatened
to do my whole family.

I've been to the Old Bills, so
they're in on it. They're in his pocket.

It's unfortunate that you've
been pulled into the frame, kid.

But... life is just
a bowl of cherries,

but sometimes it's the pips.

Collateral damage, Young Danny,

Mike will not rest
till he has those pills.

You've got to get them, son.

I know my brother.

He don't make idle threats.

If you don't comply
with his demands,

rest assured, he'll do you.

I'm sorry, but can't you have
a word with him,

aren't you head of the family?

Family's dead, mate,

Not like the old days.

We're all split
at each other's throats

because of him.

I'm up to here with his antics.

No more deaths.

No more pain in the Warren name.

It ends... now.

♪ Don't live together

♪ Don't think together...

Yes, sir.

And thank you for your custom.

- Ken.
- What?

I just booked Daniella
with El Vino.

- Who?
- Mr. El Vino.

You know, the bloke
that likes to drink piss?

Nothing shocks me in this job.

Psst. He's a bit of a perv
that one.

- Who? El Vino?
- No, Ken.

Remember, after the club's
Christmas party...

Hope we haven't got mice.

It sounds big.

Could be rats.

It seems to be
coming from the store room.

I've been stitched up!

It's not what it looks like.

Oh, Ken!
Were you looking up her skirt?

I find it helps me relax.

I was in the shit big time.

I need to talk to someone.

Tommy was a bit
of a prat sometimes,

but he weren't stupid.

Well, I thought the legend of the
Isle of Wight blues was bollocks, mate.

I can assure you it ain't.

Nick's gonna show us
where the pills are.

Nick? What Ginger Nick,
is out?

Yeah.

You're in on this?

I've had enough
of the old man, Tommy.

He's an evil fucker.

Yeah. Look, I don't want
to drag you into anything,

but we really ain't got anywhere
else to turn if I'm honest.

Well, he has been
leeching off of me for years.

So you can count me in.

But I think we're gonna need
a bit more help with this.

So I'll call Rudi.

♪ Last bus to tricks town

♪ All aboard...

Rudi, another one of
dad's old mates from prison.

♪ My name is Rudi

♪ No one better than I...

Nice enough guy.

Used to negotiate deals between

Jamaican firm of Yardies
and the Warrens.

Bit of a nutter our Rudi,
but he's a reliable bloke

with something in common
with Tommy.

They both hate Mad Mike.

♪ People say
I'm a natural leader,

♪ Fighting my way
to the top of the tree

♪ I like to think
I'm a Julius Caesar

♪ My boys they watch
my back for me

♪ Ready or not

♪ Here I come

♪ Rudi's come to get you

♪ My name is Rudi

♪ No one better than I

♪ No one's better than I

♪ My name is Rudi

♪ No one better than I

♪ Bus terminates here, so,
come off ♪

So, you say you want me
to help you, Danny.

Why would I wanna do that?

Because if we bring
Mad Mike down,

he'll be out
of our lives forever.

- Hey, you don't scare I.
- All right.

I suppose that's why you're
never in the same place

for more than ten seconds.

He wants your head on a plate.

Let me explain that.

Back in the '80s,
Tommy and Bunny,

they run this old mansion
brothel in the country.

Very discreet.

Very successful.

Money came pouring in
and Tommy got greedy.

Coke was the big thing then,
and Tommy decided

to cut out the middleman
and do the deals himself.

As you can imagine,
business was booming.

Rudi and Tommy were mates

and totally trusted each other,

all was going well until...

Fill it up, mate.

Rudi then gone and ripped
off some nutty Irish firm

for 20 grand a week before.

So they of course
returned the favor.

Let's go.

Bad news is, Rudi got the gear
on account from, you know who.

Hardly a sensible move,

and he's meant to be
the brains of the operation.

Well, I'll chop off your arms,
and gouge out your eyes.

Do you get my toby?
Give you a toby.

And Tommy took
a cash loan from the Yardies.

Yeah, you heard me.

The Yardies.

Which meant Tommy had
no choice but to pay up.

- You're a dead man!
- Or else?

You hear, right?

You hear right?

So what does he do?

Out of desperation,
he asked Roger the Fix

to torch the mansion
for the insurance.

The thing is,
the insurance refused to pay

on the grounds of FOA.

Fucking Obvious Arson.

Tommy lost everything.

He had to go on his toes.

Now he's constantly looking
over his shoulder for the Yardies.

As is Rudi from Mad Mike.

What if I told you
there was a way

we could stitch up Mad Mike

and the Yardies,
all in the same evening?

All right.

I'm in.
Where do you want me to fiddle?

You all right?

Yeah, getting there.

When we gonna
talk about all this?

I don't know. Let me...

Let me get a bit of head space

I gonna go to the pub have
a couple of drinks and then...

we'll talk about it
properly later, yeah?

- All right?
- Okay.

Yeah?

See you later.

Danny! How's it going, Boss?

Hiya, Steve.
All good, mate.

What's up, mate, you look down.

Nah, nothing. I've just
got a lot on me mind.

Sorry, Steve.

Yeah, cheer up.

You doing the Isle of Wight
this year Dan?

The whole club's going.

Right, innit?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Of course I am.

You're a genius. Steve.
Listen, I'll see you soon.

Yeah, I was happy to see you.

So why are you so jumpy?

I'm jumpy, Tommy,
because we've got problems.

We've got Mad Mike.

We've got the Yardies,
and we got bent coppers.

And I think we have to
get rid of them.

Get 'em off our backs
for good. Agreed?

Look, I hate to say it,

but I think we need to use
the dodgy pills.

I think we need to stitch
them up to the Old Bill.

Listening.

Okay.

Obviously, the Old Bill is gonna
have eyes on the Isle of Wight.

I mean, Ginger Nick's
out, right?

- Good point.
- I think I've got a way

to get those pills off
the island.

We use the scooters.

Are you serious?

- Yes.
- With scooters?

Scooters, yes,
we need six of them.

We'll get all the pills
off the island.

- Oh, yeah?
- Yes.

Because we're gonna be
surrounded by 100 more

- that look exactly the same.
- Oh come off it!

I was trying to think who
the other four were gonna be,

now you're talking
about hundreds.

Hear him out, old man.

August bank holiday

is the Isle of Wight's
scooter rally, right?

So when that ferry docks
on the Monday morning,

about 100 scooters pull
off together on the hour.

Ya, man, that sound
good. That can work.

Okay. Okay. So we got the
pills off the island. What next?

Next, I organize a drop
for Mike and Dickson.

- Who's Dickson?
- Dickson's the bent copper.

Every policeman named Dickson.

Look, Rudi, all I need from you

is to get the Yardies
to the same drop-off point

on the same day.
Can you do that?

Yeah, I can do that.

Well, then what are we
talking about here, boys?

We can get rid of Mad Mike.

We can get rid of the Yardies,

we can get rid of
the bent coppers.

The dodgy fucking pills.
In one night!

This is my family
we're talking about, eh?

Okay, sorry, it sounds
like a good plan.

But how do we get away?

Fuck... I don't know.

I don't know.

Hey, plan cool, man.

We just need to iron out
a few things, that's all.

Yes, I'd in.
The plan cool.

Rudi...

I've gotta ask you know. You've
lived in London your whole life, yeah?

Yeah.

Why are you talking in that
Jamaican accent?

Well, what do you think?

It's my persona, innit?

Alter ego.

Besides which,

them Yardies are looking
for a bald cockney.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Sweet, sweet.

All right, be lucky, son.

That was Danny on the phone.

He's going for that thing.

Yeah, you know,
he's a nice boy that Danny.

I used to know his old man.

And I know his old girl.

Do you trust him?

Yeah. If he mucks up,

I'll just kill his fucking
whole family and him.

Okay.

But we'll keep an eye on him.

Have you seen that Thunderbirds?

Thunderbirds. Thunderbirds.

You know,
"Thunderbirds are go."

See that part there?

Do you reckon that part was game
that Lady Penelope won.

I'll tell you what I'll give
her mine.

She isn't right.

Well, she's a puppet, boy.

Yeah, I know,

but I'd still stick me hand
right up the back of her.

Now... I want you all to know

that although it goes against
all my immoral fiber

to break the gangster code,

I think Vinny will
bear me out when I say

I'd rather grass him up
for his own good

than have someone kill him.

Simple as that.

Yeah, and listen.

I know it is a lot of risk,

and I know it is
a lot to ask of y'all. I do.

But I'm desperate.

And you're the only people
I can trust here, so...

Thank you.

I'll do it for a pint of lager
and the buzz, mate.

Yeah, but it's the right
thing to do, right?

I mean bad pills.

Nah, I'm in all the way

Don't need to ask me, Dan.

Besides, that rally would be
full of crumpet.

You animal.

No, but seriously though, lads,
not a word to anyone yeah?

Not even your other halves,
because if Mike finds out,

we are gone.

Listen, Vinny's right.

Mike's got ears everywhere.

So you're gonna go through
with this?

I've got to, ain't I?

No, you don't have to, Danny.

Yeah, I do.

Trust me,

I know about the threat that
Mad Mike made about the family.

- How?
- Because girls talk.

Bunny told me

- What?
- You should have told me for God's sake, Danny.

I didn't wanna worry you, did I?

I was worried.

I don't wanna be down there
getting it done

while you're up here
worrying about me.

No, I won't be,
because me and the girls

have decided that
we're coming with you.

What?

Right. For me, that was that.
There was no way

I was putting the mother
of my children in harm's way.

I had to put me foot down,
be a man about it.

We argued about it for two days.

I lost.

Right up there Ken.

Uh, yeah, yeah. They're up
in Tommy's flat right here.

Nothing like the smell
of leather eh, Ken?

It's not the leather,
Daniella's been on it.

I gave her a lift around
the block the other day.

You're a dirty bastard,
do you know that?

Phew.

Right.

We're gonna try and keep this
simple and to the point.

You got any questions,
save them to the end, ya?

Yeah. Friday morning,

we're all gonna
get on our scooters.

The plan is to head
for the Rockingham Cafe

and mingle with all
the scooter clubs

down there going to the rally.

There's gonna be
hundreds of them,

all headed for
the Isle of Wight.

Sort of natural camouflage,
if you will.

If we're being
followed by the Old Bill

or even Mad Mike's mob,

we'll be impossible to pick up.

Yeah well they might not be able
to pick you two and Sharp Steve out.

But what about the rest of us?

I mean, you're the only
Mods here,

but we don't even
look like Mods.

I mean, look at Ken here, I
mean, he looks like a pillock.

Oh, yeah...

Well, leave that to us.

♪ I'm good at getting high

♪ You, you outta reach so wide

♪ When I see your face

♪ And I see your smile

♪ You light up my world

♪ And I know I've been
cheated in my life

♪ I am lost in sound

♪ You, you got me feeling fine

♪ When I see your face

♪ And I see you smile

♪ You light up my world

♪ And I know I've been
cheated in my life

♪ I feel like getting high

It's a wild mess, this, Nick.

Yeah. Tell me about it.

When are you going?

Tomorrow morning.

Listen, you're sure you weren't
followed to here, yeah?

No.

I got out the back window.

Old Bill were in the front
freezing their bollocks off.

I'm sorry you got involved
in all this Dan.

Shit happens, eh.

Hm.

Dan, this is the map.

That's where the pills
are stashed.

It's called Oakdene House.

It's an old manor house
that's been empty for years.

"Spooky" is an understatement,

And you're sure the gear's
still gonna be there, yeah?

Yeah, still there,
all right, Dan?

When it all went tits up,

I booked it in before
I got nicked.

Right...

Where will I find the gear?

In the crypt.

Under the tunnels,
behind a tomb.

In the crypt, behind the tomb.

What is this?
Fucking Scooby-Doo?

Well,
that's all part of it, mate.

The locals won't go
anywhere near it

because of the ghost
of Father Morley.

I tell ya, whenever I was down
there, I used to shit meself.

Right.

Look, just follow the map
and it'll all be okay.

Look at it like
it's an adventure.

You'd be like the geezer

Indiana Jones.

Fuck's sake!

I'd best be off.

Be lucky, kid.

Cheers, Nick.

The ghost of Father Morley,

thought I'll keep
that one to meself.

So where are the kids?

Oh, dropped them off
at my mum's.

Yeah, she can have them.

I need to be here to
keep an eye on my Danny.

It's gonna be a long ride?

You'll be all right.
Just hold on tight.

Hold on to what?

Whatever you fancy.

The vibrations make me horny.

Oh, don't, you'll make me crash.

Judy, you okay to follow us?

No problem.

Where's Rudi?

Er, he's meeting us
at the rock in a minute.

I wish I was going
with you, son?

Listen, the most
important job of all,

make sure you get Mad Mike
at the drop off point, yeah?

He'll be there.

All right, let's get this show
on the road, shall we?

What is that?

I've got me a bit of vintage.

I told you, mate.

These old bikes
they're a pile of shit.

Fuck off! I think
I've blown a gasket here.

Then what you're gonna take now?

- Benny!
- Yeah.

Fetch me my Royal Alloy.

Sure thing, Dan.

Ah, Rudi has arrived.

But he won't come in.

There's no smoking.

Oh, good.
This would be swell.

I'm too stoned
for this bike shit.

So I thought I'd drive down.

If any of the girls get tired,
they can come with me.

Yeah, I'm sure.

Come here. Let's go.

♪ I'm getting off
in the early morning

♪ I'm getting off
'cause I'm getting on a train

♪ Staying up till
the early morning

♪ I'm leaving town
so that I can sleep again

♪ Because I feel you running
through my brain

♪ She don't know me that way

♪ I close my eyes
and I'm hearing sirens

♪ It's in my head
But I hear it all the same

♪ Going away from
our little glass towns

♪ I run away
'cause I can't take the pain

♪ 'Cause I feel you coursing
through my veins

♪ She don't know me that way

♪ I feel you running
through my brain ♪

Okay, honey, look after nanny.
Big kiss. Mwah!

Bye!

- Kids are all right, Linda.
- Yeah, They love it.

Yeah, 'course they do.

Your mum spoils them
bloody rotten.

- Do you want kids, love?
- I think so.

Just gotta find my Mr. Right.

I never had the urge,
to be honest.

Tommy never wanted them.
We're too busy partying.

Besides, Tommy said a whorehouse

isn't the right place
to raise kids.

- Ah! Hello, love.
- Hello, mum.

Right, I thought we'd have these
bits and go over the plan here, yeah?

So what's the crack Dan?

I think I'll take Ken, Rudi in the car,
go and look for this Oakdene house.

Oh, we're just gonna stay here
and watch a film on this.

As long as it's not
a Bond movie.

I really feel they spoil
the integrity of the story

when they use mindless
product placement.

Do you fancy a drink, Dan?

Girls?

What are you two doing here?

Crow here,
he's going undercover.

Just to keep an eye
on our interests.

Just think of me
as your Guardian Angel.

I want you to remember
something, Danny.

You don't deliver,
you're going down.

You got me?

Got it. Come on then.

Have a nice day, boys.

Enjoy.

We've got to search
this place in the dark?

No, it's not in the house.

Thank God for that.

Place gives me the shits
even in the daytime.

Yeah, well, it's in the tomb
behind the crypts.

Are you serious?

- It would be a laugh.
- A laugh?

I can't wait.

There's someone
standing on the roof.

- Oh, bollocks.
- I'm serious.

He's holding something
in his hands.

Fuck it.
I'm outta here.

He's got to lay off them
joint cigarettes, don't he?

No, I'm telling you.
Rudi said he saw

the ghost of Oakdene House.

Did you say Oakdene House?

I got a story to tell you.

About 300 years ago.

There used to be this nut house
on the island,

run by a priest
called Father Morley.

It was called Oakdene House.

This will be good.

Father Morley
and the staff there

were into black magic
and all this devil worship shit.

They say

they used to cut off
the nutters' heads

and offer them up to Satan.

He's gotta be pissed, don't he?

At the end of the ceremony,

he would hold the heads up
for all to see as a warning.

That's exactly what
Rudi said he saw.

- A man holding heads in his hands.
- Oh, come on, Steve.

This is the biggest load
of bollocks you've ever heard.

I heard he buggers you as well.

Does he?

Right, you'd better go on, mate.

See you out.
Grab a beer, go on.

Shouldn't be listening to other
people's conversations anyway,

Piss off, you monkey twat.

That was so naughty.

Well, hang on a minute.
Wait, wait, wait, wait.

Right, listen.
Have a drink, Have a laugh.

Don't get too drunk.
Seriously.

Gotta go and get the gear yet.

Er, Ken you're the
designated driver, all right?

Thanks a lot, boss.

Daniella, get me some
orange juice.

Put Worcestershire sauce in it.

He's good olives that Steve.

Yes, if he were a bowl
of chocolate, he'd eat himself.

Do you have the time, Ken?

Yeah, we should get going.

Where's Rudi?

He's waiting in the car.

All right.

♪ Bosh

♪ Bosh

♪ She went Bosh

♪ Bosh, bosh

♪ Bosh, bosh, bosh

♪ Bosh

♪ Let's go bosh

♪ Let's go bosh

♪ Bosh, bosh

♪ Bosh, bosh
Bosh, it's nonstop.

♪ Bosh

♪ Bosh

♪ Bosh, bosh

♪ Bosh, bosh, bosh

Fucking love that tune,
play it again.

Right. We're here.

- Have any of you got a crowbar?
- Yes, mate.

What's the crowbar for?

Barring crows.

We're smashing our way
into the tomb where the gear is.

Look, you know,
don't mess, right?

Look, this tomb shit, right?

It was supposed to be
in the house, wasn't it?

I don't like the sound
of all this shit, Dan man.

You ain't supposed to
disturb the dead.

There might be zombies.

Oh, shit. Crowbar.

Right.
We all fit.

- See?
- Yeah.

We're gonna go
into that graveyard,

we're gonna find
a big family tomb, okay?

And we're gonna get in there,
get the gear, get out. Done.

Tombs... Ah shit 'em!

Come on, let's have it.

- Can I come?
- Who said that?

- I did.
- Jesus.

What the fuck
is he doing here again?

Couldn't help but overhear
your conversation at the camp.

Piss off, you nosy bastard.

What you lankers
could do with a guide.

I know this place
like the back of me hand.

Sod it. I don't even care.
Let him come.

Come on, let's go.

Okay.

Let's get up to there.

Well, perfect, look,
we've got a full moon lads.

I've got a bad vibe about this.

Dan, I thought you said
this place was empty.

It is.

Then who's the geezer
on the roof I'd just seen?

See? I told you.

I swear down, he was stood
there near that chimney,

and he was
holding on to something.

It's the heads.

Look, let's forget
about the whole thing.

Let's just get out of here.

Oh, don't be so daft.

It's probably just some
old tramp who's living there.

Yeah, it's hardly gonna be
the ghost of Father Morley, is it?

Come on, lads.
I think it's over here.

This is a bit like being
in a horror film.

And what always happens?

I'll tell you what happens.

One by one,
they all get bumped off.

And that's what's gonna
happen to us.

I think I'm beginning
to sober up.

This is gotta be it, lads.

Right, watch your backs.

Wait.

Nothing there. Let's go.

No, no, no, wait a minute,
Look, there's a ladder, look.

All right, who's first?

Don't look at me.

Sharp Steve?

Bollocks. You go first.

Alright, sure.

What's wrong?

I thought I saw a bat.

It's a spider.

Tarantula.

Hold this, give us
a leg up, will you?

What a shithole.

I found it.

Well, come on then,
grab a couple of bags, we go.

I'll second that.

Here, I'll pass them up.

- Did you hear that?
- What? Hear what?

There was like a moaning noise.

What's that?

Come on, let's go.

Look, I know I'm pissed...

...but did that really happen?

Yeah. I think it did.

Can we go on?

Dark side.

It was D-day,
time to hatch the plan.

My gut feeling was that it would
all go tits up, but I had no choice.

For the sake of all concerned,

it had to be done.

It's all the pills
in the van, mate.

You should probably
get off, yeah?

I want to come with you.

We all want to come with you.

Be safe.

Now don't get me wrong.

This plan could all still
go pear-shaped...

I'd arranged for Mike to be
at the drop-off in person.

Not the easiest task,
believe me.

Crow.

How long does it take you
to have a piss?

- I'm not having a piss.
- You what?

Ah, he's having a pony.

Where the hell is he?

What am I doing here?

My balls are numb,

and I'm gonna disembowel that
little schlag when he gets here.

You're the only one
he trusts and respects.

Really? Did he say that?

Ah! How sweet.

He's a nice boy, that Danny.

Good boy. Good boy.

Rudi has to do
the same with the Yardies.

If things don't work out,

I'm gonna chop you up to pieces.

Take him with.

Which I'm sure had
equal complications.

You need to pray
this work for you, Rudi.

Right. So the plan
is to get everyone

in the same place
at the same time,

hand over the pills
and let them fight it out.

Then the Old Bills
should turn up

and everyone should get nicked.

While Vinny and I make
our cunning escape.

Where you going,
you little piggies?

- Vinny?
- Hmm.

I'm starting to think this plan
might be well and truly flawed, mate.

Well, we've done our bit.
That's it.

Right.

Crow, go and check
the drugs are okay.

Yes, boss.

What's the scooter for then?

For going home.
What do you think?

Who said you're going home?

You promised us
a safe passage back.

Come on, Dad.
We had a deal.

Hang on a minute.

I never promised you fuck all.

In fact,

I might blow
your fucking head off!

- Hey!
- Fuck's sake!

- Hey.
- You got what you want

why don't you let them go?

Do not tell me
what to fucking do.

- D-d... did you dig the hole?
- Yes, Boss.

- Did you fucking dig it?
- Yes.

Well, say your prayers,

'cause everyone's
going in the fucking hole.

What's that?

Who the fuck's that?

I told you to stay out of it.

And I told you that
we're all in this together.

We're family.

What you gonna
do now, Mike, kill us all?

I might do.

I might do.
Yeah, dig a bigger hole,

'cause they're going
in it and all.

Who the fucking hell was that?

You gave us your word, Mike.

My word means jackshit.

Sorry, Danny, mate.

Everything screwed up.

What you on about, you muck?

Listen, Mr. Mike, all we want
is what belongs to us.

Nothing more, nothing less.

Well, you're gonna see
what I got, Mr. Bumba Claat.

My fucking pills.

Who the fucking hell
is that now?

Right, you're all nicked.

Fuck off into grass.

Who's the grass?

Fuck off coppers.

I don't get it.

Oh, it's quite simple, really.

I was undercover.

Deep undercover.

And you lot,

you're going away
for a very, very long time.

Cheer up, lads,
it's your lucky day.

♪ Well I'm caught up in
your gaze and it's pretty scary

♪ And I'm looking to expand
to Austro-Hungary

♪ But it's not in my plan
to be your next friend

♪ So I'll leave

♪ And our eyes meet
in the middle

♪ And I finally start
to doubt you

♪ And I take a step closer
and I start to doubt myself

♪ But it's not in my plans
to be your next friend

♪ So I'll leave

♪ And I'll force myself
to say no

♪ Oh I'll force myself
to say no

♪ Oh I'll force myself
to say no

♪ To save my life
save my life on the streets of

♪ Sarajevo

♪ Sarajevo

♪ It's all out War,
war, war I feel it coming

It turns out that Old Jack

found out that Dickson and Crow

was undercover agents ages ago.

I mean, luckily for us,
they had what I would call

a bit of
a symbiotic relationship.

In fact, let me explain.

Jack knew the best place
for Mad Mike was behind bars.

For his own good, of course,
so he kept it to himself.

In return for not
blowing his cover,

Dickson turned a blind eye
to Jack's criminal activities.

And that was that.

We got the club back
and I feel great.

Honestly, I've never
felt better in my life.

On top of the world.

You know, I'd say to be
someone is a wonderful thing.

It sure is.

♪ Sarajevo

♪ Sarajevo

♪ And these all out wars
War, war, war I feel it coming

♪ Sarajevo

♪ Sarajevo

♪ And these all out wars
War, war, war I feel it coming

♪ Last bus to tricks town

♪ All aboard?

♪ My name is Rudi

♪ No one better than I

♪ Are you be I

♪ My name is Rudi

♪ No one better than I

♪ Every stop

♪ People say
I'm a natural leader

♪ Fighting my way
to the top of the tree

♪ I like to think
I'm a Julius Caesar

♪ My boys they watch
my back for me

♪ My name is Rudi

♪ No one better than I

♪ No one better than I

♪ My name is Rudi

♪ No one better than I

♪ R-U-D-I

♪ Do you remember?

♪ When we ran
as a couple of kids

♪ Knights in shining armor

♪ Our shields
were the dustbin lids

♪ Do you remember?

♪ When the gang
were three feet tall?

♪ We were climbing
over mountains

♪ It was over
the backyard wall

♪ Ready or not?
Here I come

♪ Rudi's come to get ya

♪ I said ready or not
Here I come

♪ Rudi's come to get ya

♪ My name is Rudi

♪ No one's better than I

♪ R-U-D-I

♪ My name is Rudi

♪ No one better than I

Kapow!

♪ My name is Rudi

♪ No one better than I

♪ No one's better than I

♪ My name is Rudi

♪ No one better than I ♪

♪ Must terminate yourself
Come off

♪ I wanna be somebody

♪ Look at times I seem obscene

♪ I have a high dream
to much to ride

♪ And I wanna fly

♪ Slash that Gibson dream

♪ You ain't got no shame, boy

♪ You ain't got no shame

♪ You ain't got no shame, boy

♪ You ain't got no shame, boy

♪ Like a moth to the flame

♪ And daddy used to say

♪ You ain't got no shame, boy

♪ You ain't got no shame

♪ You ain't got no shame, boy

♪ Like a moth to the flame

♪ You ain't got no shame, boy

♪ You're like a moth
to the flame