Tiku Weds Sheru (2023) - full transcript

Yeah, I might not be perfect…

but please don't put out my imperfections

for the world to see.

I'll give up my world…

give up my life.

O' Cruel one…

But please don't be the orchestrator

of the Ballard of my broken dreams.

Sir!

Sorry. You can sit there.

All set, sir! All set!

Roll sound.

Roll camera.

Action!

What's the code?

This is your last chance. The code?

Very good, Mona.

Cut! Cut!

I told you to just pass them.

Why did you speak?

Sir, I think

it'll elevate their performance.

- Change him.

- Yes, sir.

Now!

Hey!

- Come on, let's go.

- No, wait...

You're losing your per Diem.

- Come here. Come on.

- I'm an artist.

I don't know who is he.

You'll stand right here.

Don't move from here.

It's our scene, after all.

You! Stand up!

Come here.

You'll stand here.

You'll walk from there, pick up the drink,

and pass by them

as you sip it, on "Action!"

Roll sound.

Camera.

Action!

What's the code?

Hey, Dilip Kumar!

- This is your last chance.

- Why do you meddle?

Just do as you're told.

- Motherfucking sensitive actor!

- Shut up!

Everything I do, I do with passion.

- Anand.

- Yeah?

The studio people are here.

Get me a meeting with the producer.

The final draft

of Single as a Pringle is ready.

They will fund it as soon as I pitch it!

Gotta hand it to you!

Your dream to make a movie

has turned you into a pimp,

but you still haven't given up, asshole!

Hey, don't call me a pimp.

Give me the watch back, man.

Oh, yes. Here.

Hurry up.

There you go.

I'm an emperor

without a sultanate, Anandji!

You wouldn't know

what it means to live each moment.

Don't get cocky.

The girls must be waiting.

Let's concentrate on it. Come on.

I have no option but to work

as a junior artist. Don't you see?

Don't you give me that bullshit!

You love these little jobs!

Why did you say "Good, Mona!"

to the heroine in the shot?

It was the punch,

the highlight of the scene.

I say that as an actor. You wouldn't know.

Everything I do, I do it with passion,

and it's a fact!

Hey, that's for me.

Hey, Prince of Etawah! Go and sleep!

You're so lovely.

I'm so lovesick.

This cruelty might just

be the death of me…

and it's a fact!

Elizabeth!

You're irritating me.

You're irritating me like a fly.

Not a butterfly.

Like a housefly.

What's it called in Hindi?

A makkhi!

There's a new draft.

I'll read them aloud as I write them.

Yes.

You fucker! Grab him!

Harder! Hit him!

- Don't let him get away.

- Hey, no! Wait!

- Not the face, man.

- Why not?

I'm an actor, brother. It's my moneymaker.

You rascal!

You borrowed money to make a film!

Now, give me my ten lakh rupees back!

Brother, there's some confusion here.

It's a misunderstanding.

Break his arms! Grab them!

- Break them!

- No!

- Break them!

- No, wait! One minute!

Brother!

I couldn't make the film!

I lost a lot of money!

I swear to the Lord,

I'll return your money tomorrow.

Please take me to Shahid Bhai!

- You wanna talk to Shahid Bhai?

- Yes!

Break his arms!

Give me my money!

- Now!

- Papers! You can take the tenement papers!

Rascal! Why do you want

to do this the hard way?

Will you wait?

I'm giving you the house's papers.

Isn't that enough?

This is the Taj Mahal.

I'm giving you the Taj Mahal's deed.

Wait, let me get a selfie.

So that posterity knows that

Shiraz Khan Afgani was beaten up here.

Thank you.

It's a little blurry,

but I can make it work.

Hurry up! Let's go!

- Come on.

- Rascal!

I'm the president

of the Swach Samaaj Dal party.

If I had lost this district election,

I would've been...

- My reputation would have been fucked!

- Hey!

I would've been deep in...

Salaam alaikum!

Hello, Mr. Bhund!

I'm Sheru!

Your assistant at the campaign in Mulund.

I got jaggery from my village

for you. Jaggery.

I like jaggery.

Sit.

Why are you making him sit near you,

Mr. Bhund?

Hey, get out!

- Go!

- Shut up.

Keep quiet.

He's more talented than you.

Right?

How's the harvest this year

in your village?

How would...

How would I know, sir?

Everything alright, sir?

Yeah, looks alright.

What?

Why didn't you put him on the team?

He seems brighter than you!

Oh, come on, Mr. Bhund!

- You, get out.

- Seriously…

- Mukhtar! Get him out of here!

- Sir!

- I need just two...

- Get out.

- Get out.

- Let's go.

- Let me talk to him.

- You can't be serious, Mr. Bhund!

- Really.

- What?

Alright, then!

You don't have media outside, do you?

Mr. Bhund, there are only

my men outside. Please come.

Come on!

Hey, move this away.

Salaam alaikum!

Why did I call you here?

I don't know... Yes!

I want to talk to you, Bhai.

Please get me out of this line of work.

I just don't feel it anymore.

Please put me in the main line.

And could you invest 50 lakh rupees?

I'll return it

in six months with interest.

Bhai, he took my money

to squander it on his so-called film.

Why, you dickhead?

You took Mukhtar's money?

Nothing's come of that film of yours.

Single as what?

Single as a Pringle. I mean…

it was shut down.

I've given him the papers of my room.

Mukhtar, at least don't lie.

First, pay up what you owe him.

Or say goodbye to your home.

And stay single!

Don't treat me like a dog! Understand?

I get 12 out of his 15 boys!

And you… you're a pimp!

Mukhtar, live up to your name!

- Hello?

- Meet me at the highway.

I have hit upon a great party.

You can peddle on the highway!

I have stopped pimping women, got it?

I have to face God someday!

No, I'm not coming to Surat.

You keep going to Dubai all the time,

but you sent me

no gifts on Xmas this time!

You're such a liar!

Is that so? Really?

Alright. I love you.

Bye, baby!

Hey, change the song!

I'm thinking about going to Dubai.

Last month, you said it was London.

London is not the same anymore.

When are you going?

I can go right now if you want.

Hear that? He can go right now!

Sheru, I got new boobs.

Sheru, take me out to dinner today.

We'll also come along.

Don't get too cheeky. Come on.

Stand in a line.

Mr. Gulati!

They are all world-class.

Full service!

Natasha.

Natasha.

Natasha!

Dinner?

What?

Hello, love!

In the shiny, glittery city…

settlements light up like fireflies.

They say the city

turns dreams into reality.

But I only hear gasps

of suffocating hopes.

Hello.

Who was the baba our mother used to go to?

Abbu Miyan.

Mom's prayer has been answered.

I've sent you a picture on WhatsApp.

A prospective bride for you.

You know Anwar Bhai. She is his relative.

The girl is a looker,

and she's quite young.

Her father has just retired

as a driver for the municipality.

She has three brothers who have good jobs.

Also, you will get some money too.

Elizabeth!

You came into my life

Became a muse to my poetry

This is fate, not happenstance

You were the one I was waiting for

You came into my life

Became a muse to my poetry

This is fate, not happenstance

You were the one I was waiting for

My existence was a mere farce

My life harsher than weather harsh

I was a hopeless Majnu, my Laila

Living through darkness dense

And sunshine sparse

You've brought some sunshine back

Looks like

My life's getting back on track

This is fate, not happenstance

You were the one I was waiting for

- Salaam alaikum!

- Wa alaikum Salaam!

Surprise, surprise, surprise!

Oh God, look at the sky!

Sheru has arrived!

When it was time for the wedding,

my forefather drew his sword

and handed it to the nawab.

He said, "Here's your groom.

I'm not dismounting the elephant."

So fascinating!

You live in Mumbai?

Where in Mumbai?

Cuffe Parade, a locality.

Mumbai, right now,

shining like a butterfly.

Financial outburst, stock market,

media, shawarma business,

foreigners, customers…

Not customers, exactly.

But real estate agencies, like you know.

As a fact of the matter,

can we please convert TV to CNBC?

Let's check the market.

Of course, it is time.

Let's talk about the alliance, then.

Look, sirs. We can all be frank here.

This is our daughter.

We've raised her

with a lot of love and care.

Let me tell you one more thing.

She can be a little ill-tempered.

Sheru, a daughter

is always dear to her family.

As for the alliance,

we offer you our daughter

and ten lakh rupees in dowry.

I request you to accept our girl.

For your information,

when I meet with someone,

I do so wholeheartedly or not at all!

Lovely! Wow!

Tiku, my dear, this is Shiraz.

Hi. Shiraz.

What?

Him? I can't do this.

I don't want to marry!

Not him!

- Hey!

- Apologize! Apologize to him!

Right now!

I'm not apologizing!

What do you think you are doing?

No!

- No, wait. Please listen.

- Leave my hand.

- Please move.

- Don't leave.

Mumtaz, beat her up with your shoe!

- No!

- You wretch!

No!

- You've become too brazen!

- No! Let go of me!

- How dare you say no!

- Let go of me!

- Please let Tiku go.

- Be quiet.

Tiku! Tiku!

You've become too brazen.

Don't hit me!

- I won't spare you! Don't hit me!

- You dare to dress as you please!

You think you can run away?

If you act like her,

this will happen to you too.

Dad, come here! He is hitting Tiku!

Give that to me!

You'll kill the girl.

Let her go, Mumtaz!

- Tiku!

- Keep quiet.

Dad!

- Dad!

- Tiku!

What happened, dear?

If you want to show off

your manhood, hit me! Got it?

Don't you dare touch Tiku again!

And Tiku, how could you be so rude?

- Dad, you have spoiled her.

- Tiku!

But I'll set her straight.

I'll deal with her later.

- Binni!

- Baby!

I cannot live in this hell!

I won't live here!

I want to run away from here!

You promised to make me a star.

You had me shoot that lingerie ad.

If my brothers see it,

they will bury me alive!

Doll, please don't cry.

I'm going to a shoot right now.

I'll let you know. Okay?

Binni, I swear to God,

the same voice that moved

Madhuri Dixit,

Sridevi, and Nargis Dutt moves me!

Give me a chance, Binni.

One chance!

I will be a superstar! I know it!

Doll, I know that,

but this is not the time to discuss this.

- Binni, don't hang up! Please!

- I'll call you later.

I'll slash my wrists!

A man from Mumbai was here to see me.

I managed to get rid of him somehow.

You turned down a groom from Mumbai?

Yes, I sent him away.

Are you crazy, Tiku?

Mumbai is the city of dreams.

It changes people's fortunes overnight.

Just get to Mumbai.

And then watch what Binni Arora does!

I'll make you a star!

Really, Binni?

Of course, honey. Now, smile.

I was saying…

There will be no talk about her.

Of course, there won't be.

Back in Mumbai,

we have Girgaum Chowpatty.

It's called marine life.

Marine Drive!

Don't be a fucking fool.

That's what most people get wrong!

I'll explain.

Suppose, we're standing at

the first traffic light at Nariman Point.

To its left, we have Marine Drive.

And to its right,

in its entirety, is the marine life.

What's between

Girgaum Chowpatty and Dubai?

A vast sea.

Right.

That's called marine life.

- What a life!

- Okay!

Yes, hello.

Parvez called.

The family apologized.

They say the girl was spooked

by the idea of marriage.

You see, man, girls from good families

never want to leave their father's home.

They said, "Please come back,

marry her, and take her with you."

It took a lot to hold myself back

and stay quiet back there.

Understood?

I was so close to losing my shit!

And that was good of you.

The family has apologized.

Just marry her and end this here.

Yes… but I can't say yes right away.

Great. Where are you right now?

I'm with a party,

checking out a location. Goodbye.

Sheru…

what's the plan?

This was an insult to me.

They mocked a personality

like me! Motherfuckers!

So, over an insult,

you will give up the girl

and the money?

When the elder men

of our family would come home,

their begums would bow

and salute them, saying,

"Our Lord and master is here!"

The women in our family

were that well-behaved.

How admirable!

Our family is distantly

related to Nawab Daulatullah Khan.

We get many invites from all around

the city, but we never accept them.

Why not?

It's beneath us.

Oh, my. That's something.

We apologize to you

for what happened yesterday.

Tiku has agreed to get married.

You can marry her

and take her away with you.

No, no, no! No!

I'm not buying a goat from a market, am I?

She's a girl.

I want to talk to Tiku in private.

Yes, of course. You can talk to her.

Tiku got something for you.

I made it.

She speaks like Kareena.

Sana, could you wait inside? I…

need to talk to her privately.

I had asked you to let us talk in private.

- You have all the privacy.

- Of course, yes.

We will leave.

I want to apologize for yesterday.

I was angry and out of line.

Sorry.

Did you agree to marry me willingly?

Of course.

By the way…

you'll take me to Mumbai

after we get married, right?

I mean I want to go with you.

I don't want to stay in Bhopal.

Tiku!

Spit it! Spit out the gum!

You're back again!

Dad, tell him to stop it! Periods!

Mumtaz, leave her alone!

Go inside.

It's period, not "periods."

Do you like English?

Yeah, I like it.

I have lived in Delhi.

I can spoke in Punjabi also!

It's not about machine gun

you spray over the terrorist attack.

It's love…

about two people under one sky.

And their happy marriage.

You know what I mean?

I think we're singing the same page.

Do you accept me?

You do! Dad, he's accepted me!

- He's accepted me!

- You've accepted her!

- You've accepted her! Congratulations!

- He's accepted me!

Meeting you like this

Gives me a reason to live

It's worth living

A few more moments

A few more days

Do you accept me?

You've accepted her! Congratulations!

Meeting you like this

Gives me a reason to live

I do.

It's worth living

A few more moments

A few more days

Even if we aren't together

Even if you go away someday

I will have these moments

These days to treasure

Something doesn't feel right, Mumtaz.

Did she do something, Uncle?

That's the thing.

The wretch didn't do anything.

So, what do we do now?

We have to do something.

Let's send Sana along with her.

I want 24/7 reporting on her.

You're right. We'll do that.

My father, Sahir Khan Afgani,

gave this to my mother, Sultana Begum.

If you like it…

wear it.

Okay.

It's a family heirloom.

Keep it safe.

Sure.

I'm down.

Periods.

But if…

I wonder

If I really lived all this time

Take my hand

In love we'll dwell

I cannot bring myself to say it

But it is what I wish for

Won't you let me have this

For a few moments, for a few days?

Meeting you like this

Gives me a reason to live

It's worth living

A few more moments

A few more days

Even if we aren't together

Even if you go away someday

I will have these moments

These days to treasure

Tiku, how will you live here?

What was that?

Nothing.

This is just a temporary thing.

Our flat is getting ready.

They should move on

to making the furniture in a week.

And… your room's being done up too.

TV, AC, music system, iPad, uPad…

It'll be fitted out with every facility.

Wow! So cool, brother!

Do you want anything for your room?

Can we please order in?

Tiku's cute, right?

No doubt.

Heavens have been merciful!

Have you won the lottery?

I had mortgaged my Taj Mahal.

I had to take it back.

I'm going to London next week.

They're a big party.

Or I would've taken you along.

So… how's the bangle shop, man?

It's all here.

Put it there.

Big risk, big life!

No risk, no life. By Anjum Miyan.

Commitment is commitment, brother.

Shiraz Khan Afgani

never goes back on his word,

and it's a fact!

- Salaam alaikum, Shahid.

- Wa alaikum Salaam, Mr. Rizvi!

You've become a stranger.

- I was down with COVID.

- Is it?

Let's go inside.

Shahid Bhai is incredible.

Ahmed Rizvi and Chandresh Bhund

are after each other's blood.

They're villains!

But how daring is Shahid Bhai!

He keeps them both on a short leash!

Learn something from him.

What a personality!

- Hit the road!

- I'm leaving.

Crazy bastard!

Give me some more chutney, Khurshid.

Hey!

How's my kid?

I got food.

I'm famished.

Tiku ran away.

- What?

- Tiku ran away.

Ran away? What do you mean she ran away?

She ran away!

She took her bag along!

Hello!

Hello, Doll!

You asshole, what have you done?

- What happened?

- I'm pregnant.

Pregnant?

What nonsense!

What do you mean?

Asshole! I had told you!

I asked you so many times to use a condom.

- I did use one.

- No, you didn't!

I did!

This has to be

someone else's kid, not mine!

Sorry, Tiku!

- I had a word with sir…

- Tomorrow's an auspicious day.

My wife's gone missing.

Go over there to Inspector Kadam.

He will take down the report.

Mr. Sawant, namaste. How have you been?

Sir…

Mr. Sawant, I'll call you back.

- What?

- Sir, my wife Tiku is missing.

Did you hit her?

Why would I hit her, sir?

I haven't even looked at her properly yet.

We just got married.

She must have gone out for some air.

Maybe to Juhu Chowpatty.

She'll be back.

My sister ran away. She took her bag.

Your sister ran away?

Sir, please do something.

She could be anywhere.

The girl says her sister ran away.

Alright, fine. I'll take your complaint.

If we find her, we'll call you.

Give me the details.

I came all the way here for you.

I… I ruined my future!

I cannot even be a heroine now!

I need to talk to you.

I lied to you about something.

About what, Binni?

Actually, I… I'm married.

That's my kid.

That's my wife.

If they find out… it will kill them!

As if I care!

You can hit me one more time.

I messed up, man.

Binni!

Binni!

Binni!

Binni!

Don't get used to it.

Don't get used

to getting fucked in the ass!

Or it will happen over and again!

You cannot be quiet.

You are Sheru!

Roar like a lion, motherfucker!

All this food isn't only for me.

It was for husband and wife, but the

wife turned out to be a real bitch!

She fucked me over!

- Hello?

- We found your wife Tasleem Khan.

She tried to commit suicide.

- What?

- She's admitted to a hospital.

Seva Hospital. Get there quickly.

Take me to Seva Hospital!

Please step on it!

Madam, I'm Shiraz.

My wife's here. Tiku, I mean, Tasleem.

Go to ward number three.

What's going on? What happened?

Why did you leave me? What did I do?

Tell me.

Why did you try to kill yourself?

What on earth happened?

Tell me. Did I do something wrong?

The baby's safe.

Baby? Whose?

Her baby is safe.

Tiku!

Have you gone mad?

This is madness!

Hey, what the fuck are you doing?

- What are you doing?

- You're in the middle of the street!

Until your father takes you back home,

you're my responsibility.

Understand?

Come along.

Let's go, come on!

Get inside.

Come on.

Salaam alaikum!

Tiku is returning to Bhopal tomorrow.

We have a problem.

I don't know how to say it on a call…

- Give me that!

- What...

- Give me the phone.

- What...

Give me that!

Dad, salaam alaikum.

Yes, Dad.

Problem? No, there's no problem.

The problem is,

he fancies himself a comedian!

Whenever I talk about Bhopal,

he asks me to go back.

Let that be. Tell me, what's for dinner?

Yes? Nice!

We made chicken changezi.

Dad, someone else is calling him.

I'll call you later. See you.

What are you doing?

Why did you call Dad?

Why did you marry me? Why?

It was my way out!

What else could I do? I have a boyfriend.

I mean, had.

I came to Mumbai to meet him.

But he betrayed me.

I'm pregnant with his child.

Oh, Lord! Have mercy!

Get out of here.

Get out!

I'm not leaving.

Sana, come here.

I won't go back to that hell!

Should I book you a ticket?

Brother…

Tiku is right about our home being hell.

I won't go back to Bhopal either.

Then I'll fucking leave.

Give me my phone.

Give me my phone.

I won't.

- Give me my phone!

- I won't.

- Give me my phone.

- I won't.

I won't give it back!

You must be born

under the influence of Mercury.

Were you born

around 3:00 in the afternoon?

No wonder!

Mars rules heavy.

I mean, it's strong.

That's why you found such a comely wife.

Wives like that are rare these days.

Hey, hero!

I'm talking to you.

Max, isn't that right?

Hundred and one percent!

Our Sheru is lucky.

Decent wives are so hard to come by.

And people like us can never find them!

Everyone in this line gets sucked in!

Even he was really

hung up on that Russian.

- Julia!

- Yes.

That Jumbo Circus

went on for quite some time!

You wrote a lot of poems for her, right?

- Really?

- Of course.

Our brother here wrote many poems,

ghazals, and whatnot.

Won't you share one?

- Come on.

- I don't know.

Please, just one. For me.

Go on.

"Memories of you are jagged shards…

on which my heart roams barefooted."

Brother, here's breakfast.

Tiku made chole bhature.

I'm not in the mood.

Please. Please, brother. Come here.

Sana.

Ask him what time he'll be home tonight.

Tell her I'm not her responsibility.

Tell him that

he said I was his responsibility.

Stop acting like a wife!

You told me yesterday it was all a sham!

To change the course of life,

we need to change ourselves too, Seema.

Cut it!

- The background isn't happening.

- Okay.

Jazz it up!

Listen, give him the baby.

Okay.

This is your child.

And you're a happy family. Okay?

- Alright.

- Okay, sir! Ready, sir!

Roll camera!

Sound!

Action!

To change the course of life,

we need to change ourselves too, Seema.

Cut!

Good job!

Break for lunch! Disperse!

Anand…

I don't want to work as a broker anymore.

It doesn't suit me.

I will focus on my acting career.

I want to be a family man.

Salaam.

Where's Biya?

Tiku? She's not here.

She ran away again?

No. She's on the roof.

Honorable ladies and gentlemen,

Shiraz Khan Afgani,

son of Feroz Khan Afgani, declares

that he is completely in love with you…

and accepts this illegitimate

part-Punjabi child of yours as his own.

You are a good man.

I was really unfair to you.

But I don't need any favors.

I wanted to be a superstar.

But life betrayed me.

But I'll handle it.

I will find something to do.

I can at least raise my child.

You might have to put up

with me for a few more days.

I'll find some work.

Regardless,

however things may be, you're my wife.

I accept you as you are.

I am in love with you, Biya.

Could you ever love me back?

At least try.

Dinner's served. Please join us.

I'm not a breakfast person,

but you're a good cook.

CAN WE GO OUT TONIGHT?

Cut it!

Yes.

Payment?

You'll get it by 5:00 p.m. tomorrow.

Oh, wow!

You look nice.

Biya…

I have a girlfriend,

Angelina Chaubey, back in Saudi.

I had ordered this dress for her

from Italy. Could you take a look?

What?

It was a joke.

Sense of humor?

I shopped for it from abroad only for you.

Iftakhar is one of my friends.

He's from Indore. A cousin of Salman's.

When he was leaving for Italy,

I asked him to get something for my wife.

He made a hefty bill of 150,000 rupees!

150,000 rupees?

Oh my God!

Sana!

It's okay. It's not a big deal.

You know what I mean?

He bought me a dress worth 150,000!

Amazing!

It's alright.

Let's go out, then. Wear it.

- Where are we going?

- Just come along.

You still don't know me yet.

This is just the beginning.

Slowly and eventually, I'll open up.

Go on, Tiku.

I wanna see you.

Brother, you never got me anything.

What will I wear when I have to go out?

Who's your favorite star?

- Sunny Shroff.

- Sunny Shroff.

Sunny Shroff's stylist is Swati Yogi.

I'll have Swati Yogi make a dress for you.

So cool, brother.

Could you introduce me to Sunny Shroff?

No, maybe after the 22nd.

I am not sure

where he would be coming back from.

Yes, he'll be back from South Africa.

I'll take you then.

Wow, Tiku!

You look like a heroine!

Chat later.

Whose car is it?

It's mine.

I had lent it to a friend.

This place is amazing.

Thank you so much.

You spent so much.

I mean, you're already having

a hard time making ends meet.

And now, I've come along, like a burden.

You shouldn't have spent so much.

No, no, no. You're mistaken.

That room of mine is a temporary hideout.

The flat is still under construction.

Yes.

Well… tell me a little about yourself.

What do you do?

Because my aunt said

you had a footwear shop.

Footwear?

I don't have a footwear shop.

I work in films.

You work in films?

Oh God, I...

I'm crazy about movies! I love acting!

Forty-four. I've worked in 44 films.

As a financier.

Wow!

Wait, let me show you.

Look.

It's me with Salman.

On the sets of Teer. I had financed it.

And this…

Aamir Khan.

During the premiere of Mangal Pandey.

There's a lot like this.

Keep swiping to see them all.

Okay.

- Right?

- Wow!

Very nice.

Can I tell you something?

You won't judge me, will you?

Open up, Biya.

Speak freely.

I cannot tolerate poverty.

I mean, I would rather die than be poor.

Can I be honest?

I swear to God, I don't lie.

I have many flaws, but I'm no liar.

I like richness.

I mean, I like being rich.

A life of hardship and misery…

It's not for me. And that's that. Periods.

My aunts and my cousins

always made fun of me for it.

But I don't care.

Look at where I am.

I found you.

You're a film financier!

My life is set.

I hope you didn't take it

the wrong way. I…

No, no, no! No!

We are singing the same song!

I like your style.

Shall I show you mine?

Please.

Yo, Papaji! What's up?

Was that good?

Biya, can I say something?

You look beautiful when you smile.

Thanks.

Now… could you take me to my place? Disco?

You know…

one should have a modern mindset.

You're so right!

Can I have a drink?

Not in your condition.

No… I don't drink.

I mean, you could have it.

It's no big deal.

Thank you, Papaji!

What for?

For everything!

You're a very nice gentleman!

I love to dance.

I mean, once I start, I go crazy!

They never let me go dancing in Bhopal.

I'm nothing like those people in Bhopal!

They're making show out of physics!

- So right!

- Yeah.

Can you dance?

You're talking to me?

Ronny!

Walking down the street,

Looking at the faces

From happy people

With so much love

With smiles and beauty

I like! I like

This beautiful night

I like life

I like the melody

Of the guitar

Yes, I can dance.

And it's a fact!

Pick up the peg Pick up the peg

My friend

Pick up the peg Pick up the peg

My friend

I'm having fun!

Have fun, Biya!

Enjoy!

Sheru, can I tell you something?

I can't wait to hear it.

I can smell people's souls.

Yeah, right!

I can smell souls and tell

what kind of people they are!

With 100 percent accuracy!

What is my soul like?

Like malpua!

Raju's malpua!

My favorite!

Yo, Papaji! What's up?

Do you know what your soul is like?

Tell me.

Like a shahi tukda.

I can't do this.

What happened? Did I do something wrong?

No, I did.

This…

I'll abort this child!

- I'll abort this child!

- What? Are you in your senses?

I am in my senses!

I'll abort this child.

You're crying?

No!

No!

No! No! No! No!

You shouldn't have said that!

- You…

- It's my child!

Shiraz Khan Afgani

proudly declares

that this child is mine!

No!

Please don't cry, Sheru.

No!

Please don't cry. I feel awful.

Please! Please don't be sad!

Please forgive me!

- No!

- I didn't mean it, I swear!

You're so sentimental.

You're really sensitive.

I swear… it gave me the shivers!

I have fallen in love with you.

And Tiku wouldn't say that to even

Salman Khan if she didn't mean it!

From right now, this moment,

Tiku loves you!

And Tiku… Tiku is as deep as Titanic!

How do I believe you?

What's so special about this night?

It has freed me off my chains

You walking into my life, my love

- Is as dreamy as a starlit sky

- My performance is awesome.

With you, the misery runs dry

The heavens must have taken mercy!

Once, a desolate stranger…

You're now as precious

As the air I breathe

One day, I'll take you to America.

Every child is speaking English there.

You know what I mean?

Became a muse to my poetry

This is fate, not happenstance

You were the one I was waiting for

We bring you the biggest story right now.

Today, at 4:00 a.m.,

in Kolhapur, the NCB raided

- a factory of Swach Samaaj Dal party's

- Give me the remote.

District President Chandresh Bhund.

In this shocking raid,

- drugs worth 150 crore rupees and…

- What the...

- About 60 lakh rupees in cash were found.

- You know him?

-Another man named Shahid Ansari

- Shahid Ansari is my partner.

- Seems to be involved in this racket.

- He works for Chandresh Bhund.

Sources say Ansari was a close associate…

- of Chandresh Bhund's.

- Partner?

Remember,

I told you that I financed films.

A lot of black money is involved in it.

You have to pay the politicians

and maintain rapport with the mafia.

Making a film isn't easy.

I have heard about it.

Thank God, I wasn't exposed in this.

I always keep a low profile.

So, don't tell anyone about it.

These allegations against me are lies.

And I will prove that.

You always speak about shoots

but haven't taken me to one yet.

Take me to a shoot someday.

Sure, let's go.

Wow! So cool, brother!

Biya…

stay here. I'll be back soon.

Sure.

- Anand, I need to talk.

- One moment.

Junior, move along.

A little to the left. To the right.

Leave us alone, idiot!

Anand… could you talk to Akshay?

I want to take a picture with him.

My wife's here.

I'll call you back.

Have you gone mad?

Just because you're married,

you're acting like you're a prince!

You don't pick up my calls.

Don't you want to work?

I'm handling the business all by myself!

We don't have any new girls, and

the old ones are just itching to leave!

You're really pissing me off, Sheru!

Look, I've told you this many times.

I cannot do this work.

I have a family now.

I don't like doing this cheap work.

Your family can go to hell, motherfucker!

I'm already in a bind.

So don't you lecture me, asshole!

Sheru…

we live in a world of filth.

As long as we remain

here, we'll survive.

If you try to get out,

you'll be shot dead.

People like us can

never come up for air.

Go and tell your wife

that you're a pimp.

Stay within your limit. Okay?

Give him some lemonade.

Why are you getting so intense?

You won't tell her?

Fine, I'll go and fucking tell her!

Keep my family out of this. Okay?

Let's deal with it right here.

Alright, then, take your wife back home.

Or I'll expose your charade in no time!

I'm going. I'm leaving.

Drop her off at home and come back.

He wants to be a hero!

Stay within your fucking limit!

Hello, kid!

Hello.

You're in Sheru's group, right?

I'm his wife.

Oh, I see. Alright.

Changezi didn't tell me he got married!

You know him?

He's a buddy of mine.

What are you doing here, Raza?

- Biya, we have to...

- This is amazing, Sheru Khan!

You didn't tell me you got married!

And why would I tell you?

Are you the BMC?

Do I need your permission? Move!

Biya, come on.

Move, man.

BMC?

- Biya, listen.

- Yes?

You should…

head home.

What? But I want to meet Akshay.

Akshay Kumar's busy working out.

Sirbenia's stocks just fell.

The partners are all in a tizzy.

I might have to take the next

flight to Malaysia this evening.

We're all really worried.

You should take a taxi home.

- Yeah. Just take care of yourself.

- Yes, I will. Go on.

Alright, bye.

Now, tell me.

Get lost, or you'll be in for it!

I'll leave once you settle the account.

What account? You'll get zip!

Zero! Zilch!

You haven't supplied a single

girl in the last five months.

I've done 40 shifts

of junior artist reporting.

Pay up, and let's end it here.

Really? And what about

the 60,000 rupees you owe me?

You're crossing the limit, dickhead.

And this so-called family of yours?

It's not a family.

She's a tramp!

You've been married only for five

months, and you have a baby! "Papa!"

Sorry.

You shouldn't have

said that about my family.

It's not nice, you know?

I'm really sensitive

about my family, man.

Sensitive, you fucking bastard!

- You fucking piece of shit!

- Motherfucker!

- Bastard!

- Fucking asshole!

- I'll kick your ass, you fucker!

- I'll...

What did you say about

my family, fucking asshole?

- What's happening?

- Say that again, asshole!

Give me my pistol! My pistol!

- Let go!

- You motherfucker…

I went shopping today. How do I look?

It's nice.

Listen…

what's wrong? Is there a problem?

No, it's nothing.

- The stock market?

- Yes.

That's the problem.

Let that be. Now, listen to me.

I've written something for you.

Wanna hear it?

Yes.

Dear Sheru.

My Harry Potter.

You're really special to me.

You saved a sinking Titanic.

You…

you're my knight in shining armor.

Like Rock, you rock!

I love you, and more than that, trust you.

I trust that you would

never let me drown.

And I know you love me too.

Your Titanic…

to infinity.

Like it?

"Memories of you are jagged shards…

on which my heart roams barefooted."

By the way, when are

we moving out of here?

I shopped a lot today.

There's no room here for them.

Once my deal in Qatar

is finalized, we'll see.

It's a bit tricky.

Tell me, what should I get for you?

I didn't know what to get you.

Won't you have dinner?

We have breaking news.

Chandresh Bhund has

resigned as the party president.

After the drug bust in Kolhapur,

Chandresh Bhund was under

a lot of pressure from the party.

The drug bust has made waves

in Mumbai's political scene.

On the other side, the independent

representative Ahmed Rizvi,

once a vocal opponent

of Swach Samaaj Dal,

has joined the very party now.

Chandresh Bhund…

that man!

He's a savage! Savage!

Drugs worth 150 crores and so much cash

have been recovered

from his Kolhapur factory.

My goodness!

My goodness!

- Motherfucker!

- Mr. Bhund!

You've destroyed me!

They've set up an inquiry against me!

I'll break your balls, Shahid.

You'll remember this.

Sir, give me 24 hours.

I'll find out everything.

Bhai!

I need to talk to you about

something very important. It's do or die.

I heard you quit.

I don't want to work with Anand.

I don't want to do that work.

It doesn't suit me.

I'm married now.

So, let me join your main work.

Don't annoy me. Get going.

Leave.

Bhai, if you're worried, I'm worried too.

You shouldn't have done that!

Andy!

Life's a dream, a beautiful accident

Nowadays, I only look out for number one

Like tea with rumali roti

We're quirky and romantic

Woes beg for sweet release

Puffing it up and living it big!

Because…

With a double-barreled mouth

I'm a Bhaukali to the core

Bungalow, car and servants

At our feet 24x7

Every moment feels like heaven

Pearls and gems sparkle me up

Everyone is amazed by me

Like a gorgeous face needs a beauty spot

We need music to let loose

Cut the noise and bring on the chill

You need a heart Like Sheru's

To live it up

Because…

With a double-barreled mouth

I'm a Bhaukali to the core

I'm a Bhaukali to the core

God showed me the path to paradise

And ordered me to have a ball

I own the now and tomorrow

Loudly blowing my own horns

Scaling new heights every moment

I'm the king in making

Can't you see what I'm up to?

I'm cancelling on death and fear

Like tea with rumali roti

We're quirky and romantic

Woes beg for sweet release

Puffing it up and living it big!

Because…

With a double-barreled mouth

I'm a Bhaukali to the core

With a double-barreled mouth

I'm a Bhaukali to the core

I'm a Bhaukali to the core

- Are you blind?

- Sorry.

Hey, wait!

Where are you running?

Get him!

Hey! Stop!

Stop!

Hey, he's running away!

Hey, stop right there!

Hey, open up!

Open up!

Come on!

Where the hell do you think

you're going? Stop!

Come on!

Where will you run now?

Speak up!

Speak up! Come on!

Speak up!

What do you want?

We're here to see Anand.

Anand!

Yeah.

You?

Biya, remember I told you?

Film financing is a shady business.

You have to deal with

the mafia and the police.

I had a partner in Bangkok.

He cheated me.

My account has been frozen.

I spoke with my CA.

It might take a few days,

and then I'll be out on bail.

Let's hire the best lawyer out there

who can get us out of this mess.

Lies! All lies! How can

you keep lying to me?

How long will you keep lying to me?

I just met Anand.

He told me everything!

You run quite the business, Sheru!

What did you tell me?

That you were a film financier!

You lied to me about everything!

You showed me dreams!

I wish you had let me die that day!

At least it would've spared me this day!

I killed my dreams.

I made compromises.

For Dad…

for Binni…

for you…

and for our child!

I made compromises for everyone.

But now, you'll see what Tiku is made of.

Watch me as I fulfill

each one of my dreams!

Watch me live my life on my terms!

And from here on,

don't ever try to meet me or call me.

I don't want to see you again.

Please! Biya!

Biya!

Stop there!

No one can go in.

Please let me go. I need to get in there.

Do you know who doesn't

want to get in here?

Why are you being so rude, Uncle?

Come on, get going now.

Madam is coming!

- Kangana!

- Excuse me!

- Kangana! I love you!

- Excuse me. I won't say it again.

- Kangana, you're an amazing actor!

- How many times do I have to say it?

- Kangana! I'm a big fan!

- Please, this way.

- Kangana! I'm a big fan!

- Hey, get back!

Why did you push me?

I also belong to a good family!

Stop arguing and leave.

You don't know what Tiku is!

Yes, go on now.

I don't even listen to my father!

Go from here.

This set doesn't amount

to a bucket of spit!

I was here to look for work.

You're pushing me off like I'm nothing!

Hey, what happened?

Why are you crying?

What happened? Get up! Move!

Sit here. Come on.

Sit down. Hey, go and get her some water.

What's wrong? Come on, don't cry.

Calm down. Why are you crying?

Listen! Here, have some water.

Aren't you Sheru's wife?

Recognize me?

Raza Ali Khan, model coordinator?

Where's Sheru?

He's in jail.

What the hell!

That's terrible.

You married the wrong man, ma'am.

Anyway, who can fight fate?

What about your expenses?

I need work.

Please. If you have anything

for me, please let me know.

Don't embarrass me now.

It'll be done.

Don't worry. I got you.

You know what? Come to my office tomorrow.

Let's sit and talk.

Ramesh, you still don't get it.

But I understand everything.

With the season,

attitudes will also change.

Your cruelty will come to an end.

You brute, look into my eyes!

They have the same look

they had before.

What do you see me as?

A little bird?

Don't ever doubt

this bird's capabilities.

Very soon,

you'll see the moon at its feet.

Do you think…

when you broke my heart,

you broke me too?

It is your love…

that doesn't let me fall apart.

Did you think

you would break me

with your infidelity?

It is my stupid faith in you…

that doesn't let my hopes falter.

Remember this.

I also wait for this day to end.

Because I believe…

the night that comes

will be the brightest!

In this game of love,

you put our lives at stake.

But I won against death.

Mind-blowing!

Amazing!

You're really talented!

Look here.

And you're beautiful.

Does Sheru know about this?

I don't need his permission.

Leave him.

He's a…

jackass.

Excuse me, mister!

Mind your business, okay?

Sorry.

Please let me know

if there's work for me.

There's a lot of work…

with a lot of money too.

But you can't do it.

Look there.

There's a film in the making.

I'll introduce you to them.

You'll have to make them happy.

Yes, I can do it.

I'll do anything you say.

I'm a hard worker. Really.

Once I get into it, I just blow minds!

I give it my all when I act...

I'll show you a bit from Dil Se.

Oh, my! Sit down!

You're an innocent one!

Looks like I have to show you the ropes.

You have to make a compromise.

Many big actresses have done it.

Shall I list them?

I don't understand.

I think you do.

You're just feigning innocence.

You know what? Leave for now.

Go out and come back in ten years.

I'd still boldly tell you the same.

And you'll admit

that motherfucking Raza Ali Khan doesn't

beat around the bush like the others!

He says everything openly!

Becoming a heroine isn't a cakewalk!

You heard it.

If it hurt you, I'm sorry.

I saw you back there.

I feel hurt.

That is why I said all that, man.

Just go. You can't do it.

Hey!

Next!

Sahil!

- I'll do it.

- Please leave.

No, I'll do it.

- You can't do it!

- No, I can.

I'll do it.

I just want the part…

- and money.

- Okay, it'll be done.

Now, listen.

Tonight, at seven o'clock, the client...

He's a producer too.

You'll have an appointment with him.

A car will pick you up and drop you off.

Be ready. Okay?

Alright, then. Meet me at the studio

at seven o'clock tomorrow.

See you there. Okay?

- Sure.

- Okay, go on. Good luck.

Asif.

Raja speaking.

There's a new girl.

She's ready for the client.

I'm sending you her photo.

She’s from a decent family,

she's not a whore.

If it's less than 50,

don't allow for full night.

Hang up now.

Sir?

Call me once you're done.

- I'll come to pick you up.

- The match is going really well.

- Leaving me alone and helpless

- Yeah, this one.

- It's going well.

- Without a thought or care

- Dark rises the moon tonight

- No, you fucker.

Love, they call you deceit

Leaving me alone and helpless

Without a thought or care

Tiku?

Dark rises the moon tonight

Tiku?

Love, they call you deceit

Tiku!

The number you're trying to call...

The number you're trying to call...

Sana, take care of Inu.

Where are you going?

Why do you keep asking me that?

Do you have to question everything I do?

I was only asking.

Shut up.

Shut up!

I'll call him.

Listen. Where's Raza?

Why? What do you want?

I called him so many times.

Raza! Salaam alaikum!

I called you so many times.

You didn't pick up.

Why? What's the problem? Why did you call?

I did everything you asked.

You said you'd give me work

and make me a heroine.

I lied.

Don't get emotional.

So what if you didn't get the part in

this film? You'll get it in another.

You bastard, you lied to me!

Get off me!

Try to understand.

In life, only ten percent

of people actually live.

Our misery is what fuels Mumbai!

Don't get emotional.

Have some food and get going.

Come on.

Bastard! I'll report you to the police!

Get off me, you motherfucking bitch!

Worthless shit!

Fuck you!

My name is Raza Ali Khan!

Do what you want! Go ahead and report me!

Tiku? What are you doing here?

Here comes another bastard!

Sana…

Sana, I've got some food. Serve it up.

And…

Did you call them?

You told them!

You're coming home.

Tiku!

Hey! Stop!

- Tiku!

- Tiku! Wait!

- Tiku!

- Tiku!

- Tiku, wait!

- Tiku! Stop!

Tiku, wait!

- Tiku! Tiku!

- Tiku, please stop!

Hey, what are you doing?

- Tiku!

- Tiku!

- Tiku!

- Tiku!

Mr. Rizvi and I must be

star-crossed lovers in our past life.

We fight and argue

but cannot live without each other!

Let's hear it for him!

Wonderful! Wonderful!

Congratulations, brother.

You've brought them together again.

So… Swach Samaaj Dal shall flourish,

this is the Bhund-Rizvi promise!

Swach Samaaj Dal shall flourish,

this is the Bhund-Rizvi promise!

May this bond last this life and beyond,

and that's the fact of the matter!

I request you to felicitate him with

a garland and a big round of applause.

- Wow! Now, my other friend…

- Hello?

Anand! Anand, it's Sheru!

- Look at Mr. Rizvi's graciousness!

- Sheru? What is it?

Please bail me out. I'm in a bind.

Buddy, please get me out.

- Now my friend Aniket Naik…

- So, you've come to your senses!

You were acting so cocky last time.

Buddy, please help me.

My family is out there.

They have no one.

Please get me out of here somehow.

Listen, Sheru.

- Don't call me again.

- We have Omkar Paregi on the stage!

Anand! A...

Come on. You're done, right?

Give me the phone.

- Yes.

- You pestered me for four days!

Hold the light over here.

What happened, sister?

Someone stole my bag on the bus.

- Is everything okay?

- Yes, everything's fine.

- That's it. Thank you.

- Shall I send some food?

- No, no thanks.

- Sure?

Yes, sure. It's alright. Thank you.

Let's go.

All the dreams come crashing

When I was ready to take flight

When I felt invincible

In vain goes my faith in you

All the dreams come crashing

When I was ready to take flight

When I felt invincible

In vain goes my faith in you

This is how you'll get it.

The room will be vacated by evening.

- So, don't worry.

- Who are you?

Hey, Sheru borrowed ten lakh from Bhai.

Shahid Bhai was played.

Now, wait and watch

what Bhai does to you!

Sir, I was saying…

- we'll finalize it for 25 lakh.

- This is my house.

- Please leave. Come on.

- Go away.

Get out of here! Get out!

- You get out of here!

- No!

Sir, listen. I was saying…

the condition is, 25 lakh in cash.

Carpet area's 300 sqft. Check it.

Yusuf, lock the house.

Sir, let's talk outside?

Lock the door and come along.

- Don't worry. The papers are in order.

- Let's go.

I want to meet Shahid Bhai.

He doesn't meet just anybody.

- I want to meet him.

- I said he won't meet you.

Don't you understand?

She's a character!

Yusuf, we're taking her along.

- Come on.

- Let's go.

Get going.

The dal gosht is delicious, Bhai.

Salaam alaikum, Bhai.

I've heard that you're an angel.

Who said that?

If you're not, please be one.

Please help me.

Faizal?

You told me something else.

She didn't say anything about sex.

Bhai, she said

that she loves talking about sex.

I don't know why she's turned on

the waterworks here.

Please, hear me out.

I need your help. Please.

I came to Mumbai to be a superstar.

I was mad about…

Bombay's glamour.

But after coming here…

I found something more valuable.

Sheru.

His love.

Our child.

And that's our little world.

But I think…

I took it for granted.

And now…

you're the only one…

who can help me get a second chance.

Please be our angel.

Will you dance?

It's Honeybee Night tonight.

A lot of bigwigs will be there.

I'll take care of Sheru.

No.

I won't do that again.

Bhai.

It's our Sheru's wife.

Shut up, bastard.

Do you think I'm running a charity?

It's a big function.

Mr. Rizvi and Mr. Bhund have patched up.

It's Honeybee Night.

It's been six months since

you've been rotating Natasha,

Rimjhim, and Shabnam at the club.

Here's a new face.

Put her on the roster.

- Yes, he's coming too.

- I'm waiting from a long time, sir.

Wait for a bit longer.

Sheru.

- Get lost!

- How are you?

When will he come?

Have you checked the time?

He's made my wife a whore.

Motherfucker!

I'll fuck him up.

Calm down. Please eat.

I won't spare them!

I'll burn those bastards alive!

Take me to my wife, please!

It's Honeybee Night tonight.

- Okay.

- At Rizvi's farmhouse in Kasara.

- That's where they're taking her.

- Take me there.

I told you, it isn't easy.

They have tight security there.

That fucker Bhund will need a boy.

Did you find one?

These eyes search

Desperately for you

So much yearning

Affection awaits you

Let go of the inhibitions

And embrace me

Afraid my soul would be bereft

Come daybreak

My love, thank heavens for these sights

Passions that rise in you are called love

My love, thank heavens for these sights

Passions that rise in you are called love

There's more of these delights to come

Young is the night, brace yourself!

My love, thank heavens for these sights

Passions that rise in you are called love

There's more of these delights to come

Young is the night, brace yourself!

What happened to the lights?

- Hey, check the mains.

- Someone, check it.

Start the generator!

Your unrelenting gaze

Makes me blush all over

My, oh my, you've staked your claim!

A bed of roses, a hit of untold sweetness

Face like a sunflower

And an electrifying touch

My love, thank heavens for these sights

Passions that rise in you are called love

There's more of these delights to come

Young is the night, brace yourself!

Look, Mr. Bhund's coming here!

Mr. Bhund's here!

Sir, please sit. What can I get you?

Some vada pav?

Some vada pav?

- Mr. Bhund's here!

- Come on, get up!

- Mr. Bhund's here!

- Get him some tea!

- Mr. Bhund's here!

- Our brother's here!

- Mr. Bhund's here!

- Would you like some misal pav?

My words alone will drive you crazy

Honey, this is your ticket to hell

Someone out there's conspiring

Someone who can get blood out of stone

My love, thank heavens for these sights

Passions that rise in you are called love

My love, don't be so vain

Mysterious you're not

Witty or attractive you're not

No, you don't entice me!

Bloody rascal!

What do you think is nature's

most beautiful creation?

Dreams.

If it weren't for dreams,

life would be drained of its colors.

Cut! Cut! Cut!

Why are those junior artists

talking over there?

We're shooting a romantic scene,

but they won't stop talking!

You're ruining the shot!

Move them. Make them sit there.

Sorry, sir.

Come on, we're switching you up.

Quickly. Sir, please come here.

You can stand here.

- Okay, sir?

- Okay.

Sound!

Camera!

Rain! And action!

Wanderers are those…

who are driven by passion.

Wanderers are those

who are driven by passion.

- I love you…

- I have decided

I'll no longer work as a junior artist.

I want to produce a movie.

I've even thought of the name…

"The Voyage of Marriage."

Nice?

The studio people are here.

We'll show them the script.

Cut! Good shot!

Rain, off!

Lunch break!

Come with me. Come on.

- Come.

- Sheru.

Come.

Shankar, turn on the rain.

Monu, please turn on the light.

Sheru! Come on, man!

It's lunchtime.

Just two minutes, man.

Wanderers are those

who are driven by passion.

Wanderers are those

who are driven by passion.

Our wings may be drenched,

but our spirits still soar.

Cut it! What a shot!

I did better than the lead, right?

It's a fact!