The Texan Meets Calamity Jane (1950) - full transcript

Yeehaw!

Yeehaw!

Drive 'em up ahead,
Sam.

Land's sakes, must he
drive so fast?
We'll all be killed.

We've got to get to Deadwood
Crossing in time for the big

anniversary celebration,
ma'am.

You'll be a nice little
grown up once you sit still.

Hey Sam, grab them ribbons and
let'em take us into Deadwood
the best way they knows how.

-Yahoo, yeah!
-Yeah, Sam!

Yee-hoo!

I don't believe I ever saw you
'round the Gulch before,
ma'am.



This is my first trip there.
I'm going to open an
emporium for ladies.

-(LAUGHS).
-What's so funny?

Well, there ain't 50 ladies in
the whole town, ma'am.

Even the ones that are there
ain't exactly, uh, ladies.

Hey uh, what's your name,
anyhow?

Emma Stokes. Miss Emma
Stokes.

I'm glad to meet up with
ya, Miss.

My friends call me
Colorado Charlie.

You know,

you'd do better if you
was opening up a store to sell
vittles.

Hundred pounds of flour bring
60 bucks.

Eggs are four dollars
a dozen.

Don't exactly have to be
exactly too fresh, either.
(LAUGHS)

Hmm, women would rather have
calico. Food?



Hmm, be a nice girl now,
Patsy.

I reckon you're about
right, Miss.

Females do most anything to
look pretty.

That's why I went all the way
to Fort Laramie to get

-this anniversary present for
Calam.
-Calam?

-You mean Calamity Jane?
-Who else could I mean?

-Do you know her?
-Know her?

Work for her, help her run the
Prairie Queen dance hall...

I've heard so much about
Calamity Jane. They say no man
in the west can stand up to

-her in a gun fight.
-Correct, Miss.

You arriving at a good time,
too.

Big celebration going on.
But... I forgot.

You a stranger in these parts.

-Today is August the 2nd.
-So it is.

-You don't know what happened
in the Gulch one year ago.
-No.

Well, you'll find out.

First anniversary?

-No.
-Is it a wedding celebration?

No. A killing celebration.

How's that, Colorado?

-40 minutes ahead of
schedule.
-You could have made it 41.

Come on out, Emma. This is as
far as we go.

I'm lucky to be alive.

I never had such a ride.

Sorry, Ma'am. But we had to
be back in time for
the celebrations.

Celebration?

I don't see anything
happening.

Everybody's over at Calam's
place. She's throwing the
party.

Free drinks all in his memory.

Well, I never.
Hmm!

(LAUGHS)

-When you get unhitched, boys,
come on over.
-Sure thing, Colorado.

You're welcome to the free
drinks, mister.

But we don't allow no cheating
in the Prairie Queen.

Colorado, you old side-winder!
Welcome home!

Dadgum it,
don't be so glad to see me,
you'll get Calam's

anniversary gift all crushed
up. Don't do it.

-Present for Calam? Whatcha
get her?
-None of your business.

How's the celebration coming
along?

Pretty good. I broke four of
these so far.

He's always butting in on my
work.

Uh, I gotta find Calam and
give her this package.

She ain't inside.

-I got an idea of where she
at.
-You have, huh?

Yeah, you folks get on inside
and keep the celebration
going.

-I'll bring her back.
-You will, huh?

Well, I see you're back,
Colorado.

No, I'm still in Fort Laramie.

I got some important business
I'd like to talk over with
your boss.

-Yeah?
-Where is she?

That comes under the head of
her business.

But if it's anything
concerning Calam, you can talk
it over with me.

I want her to get it first
hand. Go get her.

That's what I was aiming to
do.

But not because you told me
to.

Howdy, Calam.

Hello Colorado.

I bring you a present from
Fort Laramie.

He's been dead a year today.

Such a fine gentleman he was,
Colorado.

I never loved another man.

Look at the present I brung
ya.

Here it is, Calam.

The finest that could be
bought in Fort Laramie.

Colorado...

You didn't have to go through
all that trouble.

Won't find nothing like
'em in Deadwood.

Copper riveted and
everything.

(SOBBING)

There now, little
partner.

Don't take on like that.

I know just how you
feel.

Wild Bill was one of my
closest friends, too.

But we oughta be back
downtown.

Everybody's asking
about ya.

You know, you threw this
celebration just so folks
wouldn't be forgetting him.

I don't wanna go to any
celebration.

Well, I hate to tell you this,
Calam,

but Matt Baker and his killers
wanna have a talk with ya.

-Matt Baker?
-Yeah.

-I told him he could talk to
me but he said...
-Let's go.

I don't wanna keep Mr. Baker
waiting.

Tell Matt I'll see him in my
office.

And I can't hardly wait.

Take it easy, boys.

Mr. Baker's just here on
business.

Howdy Calam.

Your celebration is a big
success.

You didn't come here to
compliment me.

-What's on your mind?
-I heard you were serving
free drinks.

I hate to ask you to talk
business on a day like this.

-I know how you felt about
Wild Bill, but I...
-You didn't come here to talk

about that either.

I'll make you one last offer
to sell out.

We told you once before
we wasn't interested.

I made a trip to San Antone
last month.

Ran into someone there that
you oughta know.

I don't know a lot of people
in Texas.

You ever hear of Cecelia
Mullen?

-What about her?
-Had a talk with her after she
found out I knew uncle Frank.

She's on her way to Deadwood.

Glad to see her, won't we be?

Yeah, sure will.

Miss Mullen is the niece of
Frank Mullen.

His only living blood
relation.

She will claim this property.

No gunplay, Calam. I'm not
armed.

Besides you got me all wrong.

I came here to help.

You're a liar. You went to
Texas to find that gal.

And fixed it all up with her
to come here and claim this
property, didn't you?

My straight games downstairs
are knocking your crooked ones
out of business.

And you can't stand that, Matt
Baker.

So you cooked up this little
deal

to come back here and take the
Prairie Queen away from me.

Well, it won't work.

I'll stand behind Calam
and everything.

Frank Mullen told Calam she
could have this clean when he
passed on.

She saved his life when a band
of Sioux ambushed him.

You ain't got the nerve
enough to shoot it up
with me.

-You gotta cook up a scheme
like this.
-I accidentally ran into Miss

Mullen and she told me what
she intended to do.

I bet.

It's not my fault,
Calam.

-The law's the law.
-What's the law got to do
with it?

Miss Mullen hired a lawyer.

-A lawyer?
-Yes and he's on his way to
Deadwood.

I'll shoot it out with him,
too.

You can't do that, Calam.

Law and order is coming
to the Gulch.

In a week or so we'll have a
real United States judge here.

Ask Sheriff Atwood if you
don't believe me.

Great jumpin' horny
toads, what's this town coming
to, anyway?

Soon be where a man can't
settle an argument in his
own way.

Deadwood's growing up, the
town's getting prosperous.

We haven't had any trouble
with the Indians in almost a
year.

Gold is drawing in new
citizens every day.

Yeah, I can just see the
buttons on your vest

busting off with civic pride.

Now if you had some papers
to prove what you say, Calam,
you'd stand a better chance.

This lawyer I talked to is
a smart one.

Told me his client had a just
claim on the property of
her deceased uncle.

So you know the lawyer, too.

-Yes, his name is Hastings.
-Hastings?

Yes, Gordon Hastings.

How long do I have to
think this over?

-Oh, about...
-I mean, before the lawyer
gets here.

Oh, couple of days.

-You made me the last offer to
sell out, didn't you?
-Well, yes, that's right.

Suppose you own the
Prairie Queen.

Won't the niece and the lawyer
try and take it away from
you?

No they wouldn't. I'd give
them a good price for it.

So will I.

If I have to.

You couldn't buy it from her,
Calam, because she doesn't
like you and your kind.

Get out.

Alright, if that's the way
you want it.

Oh, I'm sorry Calam, but I
forgot to wish you a happy
anniversary.

(GLASS BREAKING)

They can't do this to you,
Calam.

We'll shoot it out with them.

We can't fight the whole
United States government.

If we only had some written
proof of what old Frank said.

That's simple enough.

We'll write some proof.

-You can't do that.
-Then what in tarnation are
you going to do?

Just walk out and hand the
place over to some strange
female?

We ain't licked yet.

-I knew you'd see it my way,
Calam.
-Put your gun away.

I got a better idea.

-You have?
-Meantime...

We ain't finished celebrating
Wild Bill's anniversary.

Why, no!

-We're celebration bound!
Yeehoo!
-Yippee!

Yippee!

Woohoo!

-Everybody having a good time?
-What a grand way for you to
show your undying

love for Wild Bill Hickock,
Calam.

I'm so happy for ya.

He was a fine gentleman.

Thanks Mabel, he sure was.

I wish I'd known a man
like him.

Get along with ya, Mabel.

We've all got to help Calam to
celebrate.

Oh, Miss Calam. I've arranged
a little music to help you
celebrate.

-You mean Marble Halls?
-You just wait.

Henry!

(PIANO AND WHISTLE)

(APPLAUSE)

(GUNSHOTS)

Reach for the sky!

Nevermind the strong box.

I want to take a look at your
passengers.

You passengers in there.
Come on. Get out.

Which one of you is a lawyer?

I'm a lawyer, what do you
want?

What's your name, mister?

Hastings. Gordon Hastings.

Ok, mister lawyer. I reckon
you're the one we're looking
for, all right.

-Throw down that gent's bag.
-Yes sir.

The rest of you get back in
that coach and high ball it on
out of here.

(GUNSHOT)
(SCREAMING)

Pick up your bag, mister.

Now get on that horse.

Hey, you'll get hurt.

Get on this side, you dang
city dude.

Maybe we oughta make him
walk.

Alright, mister lawyer.

Head for that high peak over
yonder and just walk
that critter.

Don't be in too big a hurry.

Don't move.

-A woman?
-That don't mean I can't
shoot this, direct kinda.

You must be Calamity Jane.

We got business to talk over.

You're scheming with
that crook Baker

and Old Frank's niece to take
the Prairie Queen away from
me.

I was engaged by Miss Mullen
to represent her in this legal
matter.

As for Mr. Baker, I know
nothing of his character.

Oh, you admit that you know
him.

Why yes, he was in
San Antonio.

And you're going right back
there.

That's ridiculous.

If you keep me from
reaching Deadwood, Miss Mullen
will hire another lawyer.

-And maybe I might cause
you...
-Shut up.

Get on your horse.

Reach, mister.

I'm sorry, Colorado. He
tricked me.

Get over there by your
partner.

Now I know you're in with Matt
Baker, you city crook.

We'll see about that.
Lead the way to Deadwood.

Don't turn Colorado over
to the law.

-This is my fight.
-No it ain't. I'm seeing this
through with you.

-Let's get started.
-Hold on.

I want a little more
information about this case.

Quiet Colorado. He's looking
for something to use against
us.

We're not as loco as you think
we are, Mr. Hastings.

I heard tell that lawyers
get a lot of education,

but folks around here have a
lot of horse sense, too.

In Texas we believe in fair
play.

You and your partner must be
pretty sure of your case or

you wouldn't have tried
this kidnap game.

What are you driving at?

It's all right.
Take your shooting iron.

Well, what do you know?

I don't understand, what are
you going to do?

I'm going into Deadwood to do
a little investigating.

First I want to talk to Mr.
Baker and then to Miss Mullen
when she arrives.

If there's any truth to your
story, I'll see that a fair
compromise is made.

Say uh...

How much you getting to handle
this case?

Five hundred dollars.

I'll make it a thousand.

From here on out you're
my lawyer.

Oh, I couldn't do that.
(LAUGHS)

I'll have to handle this my
own way.

Well, I'll be a bow-legged
coyote.

Ain't this something?

From now on Mr. Lawyerman, you
do the legal thinkin' and
we'll do the legal shootin'.

Let's get going.

Better walk the rest of the
way, Hastings.

Looks like there's gonna
be trouble.

-I'm staying with you.
-Now you're talking.

-Howdy Hastings.
-Hello Baker.

Is this the gent the road
agents took off the stage?

-Yep, that's him.
-It is, huh?

What do you have to say about
this, young fella?

He doesn't have anything to
say, Sheriff. Arrest Calam and
Colorado.

It's plain as day they held up
the stage.

Do you think so, huh?

This ain't your play anymore.

-He's working for me now.
-Strikes me that you're taking
a lot of interest in affairs

-of the law.
-This matter is none of
your business.

It's my business when a lawyer
I hire sells out on me.

The gent ain't armed,
Baker.

-Besides, he ain't a
gunslinger.
-Now look here, Baker...

Oh, let 'em fight it out,
Sheriff.

-Duke it out, huh?
-Sure. Tell ya what to do,
Sheriff,

go on over to the office
and rest.

I'll call ya if things get
rough.

-You will, huh?
-Oh yeah.

(CHEERING)

Atta boy, go!

(GUNSHOT)

Reckon he's had enough,
Gordon.

-Come to my place.
-You can't get away with this,
Calam.

You better drop that gun while
you got a chance.

Come inside and get it.

Hold it Baker.

Get back to your own place.
Fun's about over.

I'll settle this with
Calam later.

-You will, huh?
-All right boys, pick him up.

Have Dr. Keeper
look at that arm.

Don't you think one of
us should go with him?

Nah.

Anybody that's stupid enough
to get on a porch to ambush a
man

oughta die of
lead poisoning.

Shut up, Dave. Go on and
beat it.

Well, what are we gonna do?

Your smart lawyer from
Texas walked out on you.

Get inside.

And don't act like a school
boy, Dave. You'll get your
chance to even up with that

Texan but not until I
tell ya. Go on now and
beat it.

In a fight like this you
either need good gunmen or

good legal representation.

Are you doing
the thinking now?

I was just trying to help.

You forgot there's one other
person interested in this
case and she'll do exactly

-as I say.
-Mmmhmm.

-Welcome to Deadwood Gulch,
Miss Mullen.
-Nice to see you again,

-Mr. Baker.
-Boys, this is Cecelia.
Frank Mullen's niece.

Mr. Carter, Mr. Dade, and
Carlos.

Did you have a nice trip from
San Antone?

Quite comfortable. And fast.
Only took 28 days.

Where's Gordon?

-Why, there's been a slight
change in our plans.
-What is it?

Surely you want to freshen
up after your long trip?

We'll talk about him later.

-Has anything happened to
Gordon?
-We better not discuss that

here. Come on, I'll take you
over to your hotel.

Oh, let me take that Miss
Mullen.

-Stage just came in.
-It did, huh?

Yes and I bet that pretty
young lady who got off is Miss
Mullen.

It was, huh?

Yes, and she's gonna try to
take the Prairie Queen
from Calamity Jane.

-She is, huh?
-Yes, if you ask me...

I don't know which one of them
is right.

Land's sakes, seems a body
could keep something that was
given to her.

And on the other hand,

I suppose a blood relation has
a right to take
what's rightfully hers.

-I would if it was me!
-You would, huh?

(GUNSHOT)

(GUNSHOT)

(GUNSHOT)

(GUNSHOT)

Howdy Sheriff.

-Nice morning.
-It is, huh?

What don't you stop
bothering with that cap and
ball gun?

Get you one of them new
Colts.

It was good enough for Wild
Bill, it's good enough for me.

Somehow when I hold
this gun I can

still feel the warmth of
his fingers on the grip.

You can, huh?

I reckon had Bill had a chance
to use it in that last poker
game he'd uh...

Hey Sheriff, why'd you
come out here anyhow?

Uh?

Oh, I wanna talk with Mr.
Hastings.

Why don't you try to settle
your differences with Matt
Baker before that new United

States judge gets in town.

I don't think we can decide
anything until Miss
Cecelia arrives.

You mean the niece.

She's here.

Just seen her get off the
stage.

Well, that's fine. We'll have
a meeting today after I talk
to her.

You will, huh?

See you in about an hour.

Why do you wanna talk
to her for?

You're my lawyer, ain't ya?

Of course I am, but
I must talk to Cecelia.

Can't you wait 'til you see
her at the meeting?

-Why not now?
-When you

see her you'll have to talk to
Matt Baker, too.

Better have some more
shooting lessons.

(GUNSHOTS)

Nice shootin', Gordon.

Couldn't have done better
myself.

Do you think I'll be safe
talking to Mr. Baker?

I reckon.

You won't have to be worrying
none about him, Calam.

He can take care of himself
with all of Matt Baker's
gunslingers.

I wasn't worrying about the
gunslingers getting him.

Well then what in tarnation
are you worried about?

Women are sure funny.

Hello Cecelia.

-How do you do, Mr. Hastings?
-I must talk to you.

Really? There's nothing to
discuss.

I know how you feel.
Mr. Baker must have told you.

But you've got to here
Calam's side of the story.

-Oh, so it's Calam, is it?
-Oh please, can't we talk
sensibly?

I'm afraid we were misinformed
when Mr. Baker was
in San Antonio.

-Why?
-Well, he said that Calam...

Miss Jane just moved onto
the place and took possession
of it.

-Well, didn't she?
-Not exactly, Cecelia.

You see, she knew
your uncle very well.

-Go on.
-It's a well known fact that
she saved his life.

Colorado Charlie swears that
your uncle wanted Miss Jane to
have the place if anything

happened to him.

And of course you believe
every word from a character
like that.

-I'm inclined to take stock in
their story.
-Very interesting.

Before Mr. Baker came to Texas
you never gave Deadwood a
thought.

Perhaps not.
Gordon...

-I did this for you.
-For me?

-I don't understand.
-You were fresh out of law
school.

I wanted you to make
a name for yourself.

I don't need the place.

It offered the opportunity for
you to start your career with
recognition.

If I had known that I would
never have accepted your case.

Well Gordon.
Now you know.

I'll sell the saloon to Mr.
Baker.

And we'll return to
San Antonio.

I believe Calam has a just
claim.

No matter. I still went into
this to help you.

I'd rather not be helped
that way.

I know that you exchanged
letters with your uncle.

I'll ask you to
present them at the meeting.

-Of course, Gordon.
-Thank you.

-You think so, huh?
-Yes, Sheriff.

If you glance at those letters
I'm sure you'll find that the
deceased uncle,

Frank Mullen wrote to his
niece informing her of his
intentions of giving

Calamity Jane this property.

-He did, huh?
-Yes, sir.

Well, he don't say nothing
about it in any of
this writing.

Are these all the letters you
received from your uncle?

Yes Gordon.

I mean, Mr. Hastings.

Is, uh, that all, Gordon?

Oh, I'm sorry.

I keep forgetting we're
such good friends.

This case has kinda got me to
thinking.

Miss Calam and Mr. Colorado
have both sworn to oath

the deceased wanted her to
have the place.

And then we have to consider
the claim of Miss Mullen.

Her being a blood relation

gives her certain rights.

Anymore questions, Mr. Lawyer?

Yes sir, I have one more.

You have, huh?

Go ahead.

You knew that I would ask you
to present those letters as
evidence, didn't you?

Why...

Mr. Hastings are you implying
that I would hide some of the
letters?

I didn't say that Miss Cecelia
but that's exactly what I
meant.

Of all the insults...
I demand an apology.

He ain't got nothing to
apologize for.

Yeah, cause he caught you
lying.

-Oh, I'd never been treated
like this.
-Order! Order.

(SOBBING)

Well, it's getting kind of
late.

And I'm tired.

We'll continue this meeting
when that new United States
judge gets here next week.

-I'm sorry, but I'd like more
time to present new evidence.
-You would, huh?

Suits me.

Let your customers in,
Calam.

And before we reopen this
case...

I hope none of you tries any
gunplay.

Fact is...

You better not.

I wanna talk to you.

I'm sorry Calam. I didn't
do your cause much good.

You should have another
lawyer.

Oh, you did
the best you could,
Gordon.

You know...

I've been crowding in a
lot of thinking.

I got an idea that, well, if

if you weren't on my side

you and that gal would get
hitched.

You and her could be happy.

As far as the Prairie Queen,
well...

Me and Colorado can start
all over again.

We won a gold claim over on
the crick.

We could work that.

Mary Jane Canary, you're a
poor liar.

What's that?

You're barking up the wrong
tree.

I'm not in love with Cecelia
Mullen.

I admit I ain't much
at love matters, but...

Well, nobody can say
Calamity Jane ever
gave a friend a bad deal.

How about us going to the
dance together?

-Me?
-Sure.

Anything wrong with that?

Course not.

Aw, shucks.

I ain't no good at dancing.

The ladies will laugh at me.

And at you, too, for
bringing me.

No excuses. Now you get
dressed up nice and
pretty. I'll see you later.

(GUNSHOTS)

Hey!

(GUNSHOT)

-Who is it?
-I don't know.

-I'll draw him out.
-Calam, come back here!

Calam!

Come out with your hands
raised.

Take it easy,
Calam.

-Didn't see who it was, did
you?
-No, didn't see anybody.

-Is it bad?
-No.

I've had flea bites worse
than this.

We better get you to a
doctor.

-Oh shucks, I'm alright.
-No you're not.

Here let me get a hold of
you.

Careful of that bad arm now.

Alright, go on about your
business, folks.

Dadgum varmints.
I'll get at 'em.

No, this is my fault Colorado.
They were gunning for me.

She had to get it.

Here's your gun, Calam.

They wasn't man enough
to fight it out in the open.

-Does your arm hurt much?
-Hmm?

Oh no, not much.

This had to happen just when
we planned to go to that
party.

Well, I don't dance on my
hands, do I?

Here Colorado, you take her
upstairs and dress that wound.

Come with me, Sheriff.

Steady now, Calam.

Don't you fret. Old Colorado
will get you upstairs.

(LAUGHTER)

Well, you daughter of a four
legged squirrel! Are you
coming up here?

I'll pass.

I suppose you're all hard
of hearing.

No we're not hard of hearing.
You don't have to shout.

We don't huh?

Did none of you hear them gun
shots?

If I investigated every shot
in Deadwood I'd be running
around all day and night.

-Where's your other
gunslinger?
-Who? Dave?

He rode over to Sheraton.

Did he leave town before
the shots were fired or right
after?

Here he is now, ask him
yourself.

You been in Sheraton,
Dave?

-Yeah.
-You was, huh?

Been out of town all day.

Say, what is this? Can't a
fellow leave the Gulch for
a spell?

Mr. Carter is an expert
horseman, Sheriff.

I wish I could ride a horse
all the way from Sheraton and
keep him as dry as this one.

What are you trying to say?

That I don't believe you were
out of town at all.

Only I can't prove it.

Alright Texan, you win for
now.

Put your gun away, Mr.
Hastings.

And neither one of you go
for your guns.

Keep civil tongues in
your head.

Understand?

Dave.

What did I tell you about
acting like a school boy?

I got a score to settle with
that chap.

Well don't try to settle it in
broad daylight, you fool.

Oh, I'd have got him,
if Calam hadn't butted in.

I'll tell you when.

Give me three.

I was just thinking...

When did you start that?

Are you sure of the girl?

-Well yes, why?
-I didn't like the way she
looked at him at the hearing.

You know, Matt,
a woman in love...

Miss Cecelia...

-I just saw you talking to
Hastings.
-Yes.

-What he say?
-Told me someone tried to kill
him and Calamity Jane

was wounded.

-Do you know anything about
it?
-Of course not.

Remember Miss Mullen, we
have a bargain.

I haven't forgotten it.

The price that I'm paying you
for the place is like finding
so much money.

And I had no idea of losing
the man I love.

Don't worry about that.

I still get the Prairie Queen?

-And I get Gordon Hastings.
-Why certainly.

Then see that nothing happens
to him.

I'll guard his life with
yours.

Uh, pardon me, ma'am,

but could I have the pleasure
of the next dance with you?

I said pardon me, ma'am, but
could I have the pleasure of
the next dance with you?

What in tarnation's the
matter?
Can't you hear me?

I ain't gonna jump out of
my skin the first time you ask
me.

-I'm a lady.
-Ohhh...

Don't I already know that?

Well?

-Yeah, well...what?
-Help me up!

Oh, good evening, Mrs. Kelly.

Pretty music, ain't it?

Pardon me but Mrs.
Kelly tripped me.

(KNOCKING)
Come in.

How's the arm?

Oh fine, just a scratch.

(MUMBLING)

What's the matter with
him?

Matter? Plenty is
the matter.

Calam has gone plumb loco .

-Fancy manners and using
cologne water...
-Oh quiet, Colorado.

I'm looking for Herbert.

Miss Stokes wanted me to
remind him to get the
musicians for the dance.

Him and Elmer's having
a little pastime
out in the back.

You uh...

-Haven't changed your mind
about the dance, have you?
-Sure haven't.

-Howdy Miss Calam.
-Hello.

Thought you two weren't
supposed to roll dice
on the street?

-Dice, why Miss Calam...
-Which one of you has 'em?

I was rolling.

50 dollars a bet.

My point's eight.

50 more says you can make
it, Herbert.

I don't know. What do you
think, Raven?

Yes, huh.

Well, here's 50 more says you
can't do it.

Here's my 50 says you can.

There she is. Try to break us,
Herbert, if you can.

-Five.
-You'll have to do better than
that, Herbert.

Eight.

Horse, do you belong to
him or me?

-(LAUGHTER)
-Thanks Raven.

You're going to have to learn
that horse to talk better.
(LAUGHS)

She said yes. She meant
Herbert could make it.

Oh wait a minute, Elmer.

I want to thank Raven.

Thank you.

What about it, Rollo?
Are we welcome?

Bar's closed.

Calam wants the nice folks
in town to enjoy themselves.

Thank you Rollo, we will.

Get your paws off that.
Ain't you got no manners?

What are you doing here?

-I was invited.
-You was, huh?

Yes I was huh.

Well just see that you don't
start no ruckus.

I bet you don't have
inventions like this in Texas,
Miss Cecelia.

Not quite.

I doubt we have anyone that
can make better cakes than
Miss Stokes.

Land's sakes,
it ain't nothing.

Guess it just tastes better
'cause that machine keeps the
flies off it.

No telling what they'll
think of next.

Now if someone could only
invent something to do
the cooking and

and washing and ironing
for us women folks,

what a life that would be.

Well, when that happens, Emma,

we won't need no more
females around.

Land's sakes, Colorado,
how you talk.

Hello Gordon.

I ain't seen her yet but
just you wait.

Listen folks.

Guess there's no use keeping
you waiting any longer.

Come and get 'er.

But someone's gonna have to
eat with forks. There ain't
enough knives to go around.

You're beautiful, Calam.

Thanks Gordon.

My boots are about to
kill me.

Come on outside and sit
down.

You know something,
Calam?

You should never wear men's
clothes again.

They're a darn sight easier
to get in and out of.

You'd get used to it.

Yeah, well, Bill told me the
same thing.

Dressed up for him once, too.

Looked at me just like
you did.

He said, "Calam,

"you oughta wear womenfolk's
things more often."

I just couldn't do it.

I wanted to please Wild
Bill but...

Aw shucks, I couldn't help
him in a gun fight with all
these

-frills hanging on me,
could I?
-I suppose not.

But there are lots of other
ways a woman can help a man

besides helping him
in a gun fight.

I remember Ma saying
something like that.

Pa was a preacher.

I often wondered what
a woman like her would done if
she

had teamed up with a man like
Wild Bill.

-Do what every other woman in
love would do.
-Yeah.

I reckon she would,
alright.

I've been thinking about us.

So was I. I mean...

What were ya thinking?

I haven't made much of a name
for myself yet.

-It doesn't look as though
we're gonna win your case.
-Oh hang the case.

Go on.

I could make a pretty good
living in San Antonio. I-I...

Well a young lawyer just
getting started doesn't make
much money but...

Hey Calam. Where are ya?

If I had my guns I'd plug him!

If I had mine I'd let you
use it.

I've been looking all over
for you two.

Come on inside. They're
fixing to start the music.

Hey.

What are you doing with
your shoe off?

Oh shut up.

-May I have the first dance,
Calam?
-All right.

Thanks partner.

Thanks partner?

I wonder what put them two
on edge?

(APPLAUSE)

Thanks for rescuing me.

-You're welcome. I, uh...
-What is it?

I believe in being
business-like, and

I want you to sign some papers
binding our deal.

I'll handle this my own way.

You're giving me power of
attorney and a bill of sale
for this place tomorrow.

I'll see you in the morning.

Oh Cecelia.

-Yes?
-I was lookin' for ya.

I've been thinking...

Calam can't win so I think in
all fairness you ought to
give her a chance

to pay your price for the
saloon.

Does losing this case hurt you
very much, Gordon?

Will you return
to San Antonio,
win or lose?

I told you it was impossible
to win but I'm going back to
Texas.

Maybe you won't have

too much to worry about.

(KNOCKING)

Who is it?

It's Matt Baker. I forgot
to tell you something. Open
the door.

It is tomorrow morning.

I decided not to wait.

If you're smart, you'll keep
your mouth shut.

-Uh huh, just as I thought.
-I was gonna destroy them.

I once heard a fella say that
women are unpredictable.

Especially one that is crazy
enough to fall in love with a
man who doesn't love her.

We'll transact our legal
business right now.

(KNOCKING)

Miss Mullen?

(KNOCKING)
(GROANING)
Miss Mullen?

Miss Mullen?

(GRUNTING)

-Who did this to you?
-Uh, Matt Baker.

Thought you and he were good
friends?

I'm sorry Calam.

I got things all jumbled up.
Get me out of this, will ya?

-I wanna talk to the Sheriff.
-In due time.

-We'll talk first.
-Yes.

Maybe you're convinced now
that you're playing your
cards wrong.

Baker is a dangerous man.

Yes, yes.

I'll do anything you say.

-He threatened my life.
-Take it easy.

I was gonna make a bargain
with you.

I was gonna say you take the
Prairie Queen and

I'll take Gordon...

Funny ain't it?

I was gonna make you the same
offer,

except,

switch the ownership.

I had more letters from
my uncle.

I was gonna give them to
Gordon this morning. You...

You definitely would
get the property but

Mr. Baker...

(SOBBING)

There, there. Don't cry.

-Where's Matt Baker?
-Ain't you seen him? He went
over to your place.

-Where's Baker?
-He's upstairs in your office
with Mr. Hastings.

That's all, George.

Mr. Baker has some very
interesting papers.

Yeah, I know.

Power of attorney signed by
Miss Cecelia Mullen.

And a bill of sale for
my place at a steal of a
price.

Now look, Calam, you're late.

I'll give you a thousand
dollars to walk out
peaceably.

Maybe you'll do some walking
out of town when that gal
talks to the Sheriff.

You took some letters from
Miss Mullen and I aim to get
'em.

-What letters?
-Letters Old Frank wrote to
his niece telling her

he was going to give me
the Prairie Queen.

Hand them over, Baker.

(GUNSHOT)

Drop it!

You've got the gun. Go on
and shoot me.

You've had this coming for
a long time.

(PIANO NOTES PLAYED)

That's as clean as a musical
knock out as I ever seen.

Get the letters.

Reach.

Get Matt.

You got any last messages
before I leave?

-You alright, Calam?
-Sure, how's your
passengers?

Them? Huh.

I can't figure out which one's
ready for the coroner and
which one's ready for jail.

-Did you get
the letters Gordon?
-I got 'em.

All aboard that's going
to Laramie.

I wanted to say goodbye to
Calam.

But you can tell her for me

that I think she's the
grandest person I know.

Yes ma'am.

You see, Calam ain't
much of a hand to say goodbye
to folks she likes.

I gotta do it for her.

Aw shucks, you hadn't oughta
done that Miss Cecelia.

Give it to Calam. From me.

-She made us realize
we are in love.
-Yes ma'am.

Goodbye Mr. Hastings.

So long, Colorado. You
old gunslinger.

-It's been nice knowing ya.
-Don't you go getting all
sentimental-like.

Calam wants you to head on
back down to San Antone and

make yourself and Miss Cecelia
happy.

-She's a grand lady.
-You know something?

Calam's a grand lady, too.

I'll tell her you said that,
Mr. Hastings.

It'll make her happy.

All aboard that's getting
aboard.

Hiya!

-Howdy Colorado.
-Howdy Sheriff.

Well, I reckon everything
is settled.

Calam can keep the Prairie
Queen.

I'll see that United States
judge gives her a legal claim
as soon as he gets here.

You will, huh?

-Have they gone?
-Yup.

And left a couple
messages for you, Calam.

Hastings said you sure are a
fine lady.

-What else?
-Well...

-Uh...
-What is it?

Miss Cecelia said that uh...

Give ya this!

Doggone it, I done it.

Didn't get the messages
mixed up, did ya?

I hope not.

Well...

I reckon I ain't loved anyone
else but him, anyway.

Pard,

we'll meet again in the
happy hunting grounds.

I sure hope there's
plenty of room up above,
Calam.

'Cause when you and Wild Bill
get together again,

there's gonna be some
tall shooting.

When I die, Colorado...

I wanna be buried right here.
Beside him.

Calam's wish was granted.

Her friends buried her
beside him.

Calam died in Deadwood 27
years later.

On the same day of the month
Wild Bill was killed.

August the second.