The Seven Deadly Sins (1962) - full transcript
Seven directors each dramatize one of the seven deadly sins in a short film. In "Anger," a domestic argument over a fly in the Sunday soup escalates into nuclear war. In "Sloth," a movie star would rather pay someone to tie his shoe than bend over to do it himself, and he can't be bothered to accept a starlet's sexual favors. In "Gluttony," a peasant family on its way to the funeral of a relative who died from indigestion stops regularly to eat and drink en route, arriving in time to eat some more. In "Greed," a high-class prostitute refunds the price of a cadet's lottery ticket. In "Pride," an unfaithful wife finds reason to reform. And so on through lust and envy.
"THE SEVEN DEADLY SINS"
"GREED"
"ENVY"
"GLUTTONY"
"LECHERY"
"SLOTH"
"PRIDE"
"ANGER"
And now...
"ANGER"
- How good you look!
- Congratulations!
- I'll think about it.
- What a beautiful day.
- How wonderful!
- Thank you.
- It's very good.
- It's a very good thing.
Thank you.
May the Lord give it back
to you a hundredfold, ma'am.
I do hope so, my friend.
- My respect to your good mother.
- Thank you.
Oh, no, don't trouble yourself.
What a joy to panhandle!
- It's not hot.
- It's not cold.
- My dear, how is your poor husband?
- Well, you know, he's happy.
He's very well-adjusted
to his paralysis.
He's always successful!
So, have you found
a place to stay, my good man?
Yes, a kind soul has taken me in.
Fortunately, there's
no lack of kind souls.
And when you get bored, do
come see us at the station, huh?
I will write them into my will.
Good Sunday!
- Hello, Father.
- Hello, Mr. Teacher. Pray for me.
Oh, it's wonderful!
His mother was from Perpignan.
His father was from Mermignan.
His father was from Brest.
His mother was from Litowsk.
You see? On Sundays,
he only drinks mineral water.
- Alcohol is for weekdays.
- For him, it's the reverse.
Congratulations!
What a beautiful child.
- Oh, a beautiful child!
- He looks good!
Oh, he's very smart. He just got
accepted into superior school.
- Which superior school?
- L'Ecole Anormale.
Happy Sunday.
Happy Sunday.
- Happy Sunday.
- For your wife, with my affection.
For your husband, with my respect.
Excuse me, I'm in a hurry.
Happy Sunday.
Happy Sunday!
- Happy Sunday.
- Happy Sunday.
- Happy Sunday.
- Happy Sunday.
Happy Sunday!
- How about listening to the news?
- It'll be good, as always.
''Hello, dear friends.
I am happy to be with you again.
And I wish you a Happy Sunday.
The news is good. The son
of the chairman of the country board...
who is a great sportsman,
has successfully crossed the Channel...
while swimming the backstroke.
He's climbing the rostrum in the town
square in his brand-new uniform...
of a swimming instructor.
His father, surrounded by
the district officials...
vigorously shakes his hand
as he cries with happiness.
- My little turnip.
- Papadoff, author
of the famous novel...
Let the Little Girls Come Unto Me,
is visiting our town.
- He's also delighted to learn...
- My little turnip.
- that he has won the Prix Femina
for his new novel...
- My chicken.
- Burning Candles at Both Ends.
- My pigeon.
- My dove.
- At his side his beautiful wife Eva...
takes a swim in the pool
of the municipal gardens.
That makes Popoff dance.
- My little flea.
- My little flea!
Meanwhile, the swallows
return with spring.
- My squirrel.
- My kitty.
- My gazelle.
- My cockroach.
The celebration of this year's carnival
has been very successful.
All our schools participated
with the alumni and parents.
We are broadcasting the happiest images
of it to you, dear viewers.
Do you find them entertaining?
Opinions are mixed,
but most are favorable.
We'll do better next year.
The Carnival's master of ceremonies,
its organizer for half a century...
strove mightily for creativity.
Watch how he let his joy explode.
They made him a cake for a reward--
- Let's have lunch.
- Bon appetit.
Let's have lunch with music.''
Oh, more.
More, more.
Oh, more soup!
- More soup!
- Oh, soup!
- Ah. More soup.
- Oh, but it's a spring soup.
But you could say tranks, though.
Thanks, though.
You don't look happy.
What's with you?
It's nothing. I'm used to it.
A fly in my soup, like every Sunday.
A fly in your soup? Liar.
Isn't this a fly?
- What fly?
- This fly. Look!
For 25 years, every Sunday.
I find--
- A fly in his soup!
- A fly in his soup!
A fly, my child,
in my soup.
- Every Sunday, for 25 years--
- You play disgusted.
What a big fuss over a fly!
You're playing disgusted.
You weren't raised in a castle.
I know what your parents were.
- They were what?
- Ragmen.
There are no stupid jobs.
It's an honest career.
It's better to be a ragman
than a procurer.
Aren't you ashamed
to speak ill of my parents?
- Where would you be without my dowry?
- They paid me in counterfeit.
- It was a tidy sum anyway.
- It's no reason to deliberately...
put flies in my soup
every Sunday!
Oh, my uncle warned me you were crazy!
He was right.
Your uncle is a moron, and he's
as senile as your stupid cousin!
My cousin was a Grand Duchess!
He was a sucker.
A real sucker.
- His family--
- They're gallows birds.
Everybody knows that
your great-grandfather...
was a phony panhandler.
And your family was false nobility.
Imposters, Madam.
Your father, your mather.
All of them atheists.
Oh, my daughter!
- Bite him!
- Shit, shit, shit!
- Shit.
- There! There! There!
What?
No, no, no, no, no, no!
And boom!
Help, help, thief!
- Help! Help!
- Thief! Thief!
- Snake! You old snake!
- In the grass, mister.
Ladies and gentlemen, in a few moments,
it will be the end of the world.
Earth!
These are the dangers of Anger.
Let's hope that the other sins
will be less destructive.
"ENVY"
"Inn At The St. Antoine Vineyard"
Is it true that Miss Gerly
is at your place for the weekend?
The actress? That's incredible!
For these people,
every day is the weekend.
You'd see some weird things
there, little Rosette.
If only there weren't
all those beds to make.
Why don't you come and make mine
one of these nights?
No way! What she wants in her bed
is Mr. Jasmin-- no less!
- Or the boss--
- He's never here, so--
- Bye-bye.
- Bye-bye. See you tomorrow.
My poor Jasmin, do you think
I didn't see you playing the Romeo?
But what's with
all those girls, this year?
- What do they see in you?
- They see a handsome man.
Ah, Rosette. If only you would.
Do you know what we'd do together?
Of course, but Mr. Jasmin
mustn't learn about it.
Of course not. We could take a trip.
Do you know the bridge at Tancarville?
Oh, but that's much too far.
Or it's much, much too close.
- Your ambition will be your pitfall.
- Rosette, what are you waiting for?
Mr. Duchemin asked for his breakfast.
Don't forget, Miss Garly
likes it very hot.
"To Mr. and Mrs. Jasmin, at whose place
the rapture of the roses...
gives me rest from the intoxication
of applause: Rita Gerly."
Mr. Duchemin is very lucky
to have it off with Miss Gerly.
It's Jean René Duchemin, you know.
Arras Textiles, Pastis Stimul,
the Paris Group--
I don't know how many newspapers--
If he wanted Mrs. Jasmin,
he would have her!
You! Never at the right time,
never in the right place.
But when we're alone,
you don't do anything!
- We're alone now, Rosette.
- But anyone could come around.
- Mr. Jasmin!
- You're bugging me with Mr. Jasmin.
You're killing me!
You give me so much pleasure.
Why do I love you so much?
Always more.
Why do I find you so handsome?
There's such peace when I'm near you.
- Such happiness.
- You see?
I'd stay near you forever
without doing anything.
Without doing anything?
Tut, tut. What if Mr. Jasmin
were to show up?
No, he didn't call me.
It's too late, isn't it?
Come in.
Do you think so? That's because--
I don't know. It's an idea.
I was counting on it.
Such a lucky break.
Put that down over here, dearie.
No, not there. There!
My name on a Hollywood film,
I'm going to seize that opportunity.
What? Of course.
Put yourself in my shoes.
What are you waiting for?
Give me my bed jacket.
Get to it!
Excuse me, I was talking to the maid.
Of course. Yes.
Certainly.
Yes, of course.
No, not the curtains! The sun,
at this hour? You want to kill me.
Those girls are stupid.
With those people, it's in their blood.
No, not the producer's blood!
Yes. You really think so?
You think there's still hope?
You really think so?
What is envy?
Envy is the sadness we feel
at the happiness of others.
- What is an envious person?
- An envious person is one...
who is sad at the good
and happy at the evil...
which happens to others.
Very good, my little girls.
So, is my bed jacket coming?
Hello? No.
There's another appli--?
Appli-what?
Applicant. Don't tell me
that it's going to be--
Don't tell me.
Why did you tell me?
He told me. Why didn't
you tell me sooner?
You should have told me!
You must tell me everything.
She has no beauty, no talent,
no skill, no boobs, nothing.
The opposite of me.
You talk about an appli-- an appli--
Yes, good-bye my dear, thank you.
I'm completely reassured.
Completely reassured.
Giselle Marinelli.
The Americans should be delirious.
Not that! There, in the cupboard,
down there. I see it from here.
What a moron!
I can stand everything
except stupidity.
There! There!
What are you waiting for?
Go, go!
Mr. Jasmin?
Rosette, I was looking for you.
I have to leave for a moment,
and there's no one in the office.
Miss Gerly is waiting for
a very important call from Hollywood.
If she's not in her room
when the call comes in...
she'll be in the garden
where she'll be sunbathing.
If you want to sunbathe too,
I'll let you do it.
- Did you sleep well, Mr. Verdier?
- Yes and no. You know.
At siesta time, as usual.
Do you understand?
From Hollywood, yes.
Miss Gerly can count on me.
Mr. Verdier, please.
Be quiet!
Hello?
Yes, this is Rita Gerly.
Yes, thank you.
Let me talk to him.
Hello? No. Miss Gerly
is not here anymore.
Nor Mr. Duchemin either.
I don't know. They left this morning
without leaving an address.
Oh, for the film.
Yes, I understand.
I'm sorry. You're welcome, sir.
At your service.
Sometimes, if you weren't so nice,
I wound wonder if you weren't mean.
She's the mean one.
Not mean. Worse. Envious.
You should have heard her
talk about Giselle Marinelli.
Envy is always punished.
It's a very great fault.
Rosette, do you know
what your great fault is?
- No, teacher.
- Listen to what...
my dictionary says about envy,
for you are envious, Rosette.
"Envy: allegorical divinity, daughter
of the river Styx and the night.
Represented with
the features of an old woman.
Ugly and fleshless,
surrounded by serpents,
one of which is gnawing at her heart.
Pale complexion, sunken eyes...
gaze dubious and dark.
Envy is an eminently
concentric passion...
that is, it gathers in the blood
from your extremities...
to the internal organs.
The liver is filled
with a black blood...
the skin takes on a pale color.
The irritation of the bowels
is transmitted to the brain...
as if to make it share its suffering.
From there rise dark
and stormy thoughts...
that finally drive
the envious person...
to melancholia, madness, and death!"
What's the matter?
How funny a penguin
looks in a meadow.
- Where did you lift this from?
- I didn't lift it.
I found it in a trash can.
Look at this jacket, Mr. Jasmin.
It's so chic.
- Very pretty.
- Isn't it late for sunbathing?
- But I couldn't come earlier!
- But are you the boss, or what?
Really, Rosette, I don't
understand you anymore.
You know, I have a buckskin jacket,
if you like that.
Maybe you have a buckskin jacket,
but you'll never have what goes with it.
Who put that record on?
I don't know, Mr. Jasmin.
Change it.
Why always the same people?
Why her, and not me?
It's too unfair.
If only it could be me.
If Mr. Duchemin, with all his millions,
would take me away.
We are very happy to see you
here again, Miss.
Imagine, it was only a year ago that
you did us the honor of working here.
What changes in your life, Miss.
You must be very happy.
Yes, Jasmin. Very happy.
Yes, Jasmin. Very happy.
There's nothing else to wish for.
Nothing at all.
Such is envy...
which carries in itself
its punishment and its poison.
If one has the bellboy,
one wants the billionaire.
If one has the billionaire,
one wants the bellboy.
It's hell.
"GLUTTONY"
Valentin, Jeanne, Nénesse.
A telegram.
- A telegram?
- Alphonse, you old devil.
- My God, it's not for us, I hope.
- Why, couldn't we get a telegram?
- Oh, I'm all shook up.
- Pick up your plate.
- Have a drink.
- I won't say no.
- Cheers, Alphonse.
- To your health, Valentin.
- To our health.
- To yours, Jeanne.
I could use a little drop myself.
- Oh, I'm all shook up.
- All the better!
- I'm all shook up!
- Have a bite.
- My heart's not in it.
- Don't worry, those are kidneys.
Say what you want, no matter how
little you eat, it still picks you up.
Oh, by the way...
Telegram.
- Read it.
- Well, I already read it.
- What, are you reading my mail?
- Well, always the telegrams.
- That's for smoothing things out.
- What things?
- Rough edges.
- Alphonse you old devil.
Quiet, Nénesse! Listen a little.
That's odd, your mother.
We should get her ears unplugged.
Alphonse, we are listening.
"Granddad, indigestion.
Burial Tuesday."
- My jacket.
- You're leaving right away?
- Right away.
- But listen, it's for tomorrow.
- You have the whole day.
- One day, maybe...
but it's 20 miles away!
Women, put on your hats.
Take the car out.
Jeanne! Hitch up the horse.
Nenesse! Pick three chickens.
Bring up the bottles.
Take down the andouilles.
Don't forget the pate!
- Come on. Whoa!
- We don't amount to much, do we?
- Hey, Jeanne! The ham, too!
- Sure, twenty miles.
Giddap. Come on.
Turn your ass, Bijou.
Twenty miles.
I'm thirsty just thinking about it.
Come on, move it, damn it.
- Maybe we could have a drink?
- We mustn't forget the ceremony.
- You're right. Hurry up.
- Maybe a quick one.
Imagine, we have to leave all this.
We're gonna eat cold food!
- Don't tell me about going away.
- Your father's really gone away.
Oh, him. He couldn't stand still.
No, he always had to be different.
- No, he had to--
- Be brave, Valentin.
- Well, well, well.
- You think so, too?
We're going on a beautiful journey
We're going on...
a beautiful journey
Will you have enough?
Oh, well.
We'll have to make do.
Anyway, I'm sure granddad
ate hot food till the end.
Oh, we don't amount to much.
One for the road.
All right.
Let's get going, women.
- It always turns over.
- Don't be reckless, okay?
Fear not, Alphonse.
I put the straps on.
- Good-bye, Valentin.
- Good-bye.
Valentin, good-bye.
Good-bye! Good-bye!
- Good-bye, Alphonse.
- Good-bye, Jeanne, Good-bye, Nénesse.
We're on our way!
Ah, yes. Your father's
now in his grave.
Ah, yes. In his grave.
Makes you hungry. It's noon.
Stop, we have to have a bite.
We just left!
We don't need to stop.
- But where are we?
- Far.
- So you don't want to stop?
- I don't want to louse up my diet.
All right, as you like.
Then you won't complain if I pass out?
- Who, Valentin?
- Watch your mother. She's out of it.
It's always the best ones who go.
- I'm dying of hunger.
- She's dying, she says!
I don't even have time
for a peaceful bite...
and then I have to share it!
You won't deny her
a piece of bread?
At her age, she's eating
other people's bread.
If your father hadn't stuffed himself,
we wouldn't have this foolishness.
Quite right.
Not even the time to get organized.
Forced to hit the road like this!
You don't fit
in your own century, Valentin.
In our days, it's the speed!
Speed and sandwiches.
Can one live with cold food?
No, Valentin.
No, what? Always no!
She's always saying no, your mother.
She's always a contrarian.
And usually, Nénesse, you're
not happy with sandwiches, huh?
Okay, we'll make a fire.
Hello, Valentin!
Ah, Nénesse, I still like you.
I wouldn't say no
Maybe we should tell her
where we're going.
Don't worry her, Jeanne.
We may be sad, but we can have feelings.
The sensations...
the smells!
Oh, that smells good.
There are times when I envy spaniels.
They smell it all.
They don't waste a thing.
All these rich odors!
No, no, I won't go any further.
At least not tonight.
Pass me the pepper. Imagine,
if granddad hadn't died...
I might never have known
what it is to travel.
That's right.
Why don't you say he did well to die?
Absolutely.
Granddad's never been so much with us.
Ah, what a man!
I've never known a man more expert...
in cooking a vol-au-vent,
cutting poultry, or rolling a feuilleté.
Let me tell you, Jeannette...
at this moment, the saints must be
stuffing themselves in paradise.
Let's hit the road, women!
I can't see anymore.
Dump your pipe.
Did you ever see me
dump a pipe in the middle of it?
I don't see a thing.
- Am I driving on the right?
- Stop. I'll take a look.
You're on the left.
Like in England.
Oh, what a trip!
Unload the baskets!
My goodness, it's Alphonse!
Alphonse!
Himself.
My goodness! Valentin!
Are you lost?
- How would I know?
- It's very simple. You follow the road.
- Yes, and I end up in England.
- You think so?
- Do you want a map?
- You're a savior, Alphonse.
It's my job-- letters,
telegrams, maps and calendars--
- So, where are we?
- Let's see, let's see--
We are...
in France.
Paris, where is Paris?
Ah, Alphonse. Paris, huh?
40,000 restaurants.
60,000 bars.
- What do you think of that?
- To go to them all, it would take--
- Oh, it would take--
- No, wait, wait!
- It would take 365 days.
- Right.
That means 52 weeks--
You said 60,000?
- But where the hell are we?
- Well, we must be there.
No, that's Montelimar.
The nougat.
You can go anywhere, Alphonse.
Anywhere. Do you want a madeleine?
- Yes.
- Commercy.
- Andouillettes?
- Troyes.
- Sausages? - Toulouse.
- Jambon de Parme. - Bayonne.
- Cheese?
- Camembert! Port-Salut! Livarot!
- Roquefort.
- Reischoffen! Gravelotte! Verdun!
- Sugared almonds!
- Yes.
Listen, I'm not getting bored,
but I have to deliver a telegram.
- Again?
- Don't worry. It's not the same.
I'll read it to you.
Oh, this one is really--
"Hello, Marcel. Raymonde's Baptism.
Killed the pig. Counting on you."
- Some people are lucky.
- Each to his own fate.
- It's too sad. Let's have a drink.
- No, I have to finish my rounds.
No, it's my round!
- To your health. To yours. To his.
- To ours. To theirs.
To yours!
You're not ashamed? And you,
Nénesse, should be the example.
Let's hit the road.
There's 3 hours left, and 7 miles to go.
- No time to lose.
- What's the time?
Noon. Noon?
- Let's eat.
- It's not noon!
It's always noon by my watch.
Once and for all. Let's eat.
Let's get going.
Well, I'm rushing.
We don't want to miss the ceremony.
No. No way.
Don't want to miss
granddad's burial, huh?
I'll try to drop by later on.
Jeanne, wait for me.
Don't go so fast.
Look! Pears!
The last pears!
We couldn't let them go to waste.
You see, Jeanne,
it's hardest on the ones that stay.
Raspberries, strawberries
The good wine we drank
All together!
Raspberries, strawberries
The good wine we drank
Oh, the pretty village girls
We'll never see again
Oh, granddad.
We won't see him again either!
You crying? Good timing.
We're there.
Oh, how quickly we are gone.
I believe so. Everybody is gone.
How could we be late?
We started in good time.
More than that, we cut corners!
Let's hurry.
We're going to miss everything.
It's over.
Oh, granddad.
Always the same.
- Always in a hurry.
- We still have a chance.
- To the cemetery!
- To the cemetery!
Valentin, it's here.
Coming.
Hey! Look what I found.
Some petit gris escargots.
Not bad, huh?
- You have two bourguignons, too.
- That's right. Put that aside.
So, this is the grave.
I only regret that granddad wasn't here
to eat them with us.
Because with escargots,
granddad was--
- You can't eat snails when you're dead.
- Oh, yeah.
Oh, that's good.
They found a wreath.
No, I'm the one who got it.
- Fortunately, I'm here.
- Oh, Jeanne.
Nénesse!
My little ones!
- What's wrong with him?
- I'll tell you.
What are we doing here?
I'm hungry.
Black is the color
that shows the least dirt.
Huh? Oh, yes.
You can't always do what you want.
Tell me, Mr Swiss Guard,
have you seen the relatives?
That's right. Where's the relatives?
They can't have all died the same day.
Unless there's an epidemic.
- Where did they go?
- Follow me. I'll show you the way.
Oh, that's so kind. In our homeland,
depending on foreigners.
Thank you, Mr. Swiss Guard.
Let's go!
And the family?
What state will they be in?
- Any duck left?
- Yes. Over there.
- Don't get up.
- No trouble. Let me stretch my legs.
Don't worry about them.
You, eat.
You, don't put jam on your paté.
- Here's the duck.
- I'm getting worried.
- Here they are.
- Jeanne, Valentin, Nénesse!
This is the first time
we see you late for lunch!
- How long have you been here?
- Six hours. We were worried stiff.
They've started the appetizers
without me, the bastards.
Come on,
let's start from scratch again.
- I saved you a seat.
- Let's have a shot! Bottoms up!
- May I sit down?
- Have a seat, Mr. Swiss Guard.
- Where are you going, Alphonse?
- Make some room.
Here's to the bride!
- No, granny, it's not a--
- Anthony!
- Yes?
- We didn't tell her. We're sparing her.
It's sad enough as it is.
The chicken's from Angele's.
They're giants.
We have some too,
but they're not as big.
Emile, Ernest, Anthony, cousins.
Granddad, as you well know,
had principles.
Rare beef and tender woodcock.
- Your white wine is excellent.
- It's a Muscadet.
Always at the breach!
He woke at the crack of dawn
to unhook the andouilles.
Always at the breach!
Always with the knife ready to cut.
In 1870, before the Prussians.
In the Great War, before the same.
In '36, before the red peril.
In '40, before the Germans,
and recently, before the yellow peril...
the Algerians, our own generals
and the commies.
He was--
What was I saying?
Oh, yes. He was always full.
Always...
until the day before yesterday.
Never forget his motto:
"You can eat anything."
Bravo! To granddad!
I only regret we don't
see each other more often.
Yes, but you need an occasion.
We won't miss any.
Nénesse, behave yourself
and wait on your neighbors.
Don't you think we have enough misery?
For you, eating is a misery.
To stuff yourself
up to here is a misery?
Look how it ends.
Look, instead, at how it starts.
"LECHERY"
"Censored"
How pretty they are.
- Oh, Bernard. How are you?
- Jacques. How are you?
- Boy, are you messy.
- And, you're ugly.
We look how we look,
but you could get a shave.
- That's life.
- What are you doing?
I'm wandering.
Looking for inspiration.
Oh, inspiration.
Here it is, your inspiration.
Yes, it's her!
Caroline, my cousin.
Imagine meeting you in this street.
My ideal, my sweetheart, my sister.
Let's commit the incest I've dreamt of
since the maternal breast.
- We're made for each other.
- What a naughty boy.
- Want to walk?
- Yeah.
- Are you painting?
- Oh, I'm in pain.
- What about your talents?
- Flown away.
- You should drink.
- I can't. My liver's shot.
- Look at that cruddy painting.
- And it sells.
- By the way, I saw René.
- How is he?
- Same old, same old.
- Still in abstract?
- More than ever.
- It's up to him. How does he look?
He looks more and more
like a Brueghel.
- Bosch.
- What?
Hieronymus Bosch.
Wow, it's expensive.
What should I do?
Take it, or not?
- Tails, I take it.
- You debauch yourself, pal.
- Why?
- You "de-Bosch" yourself. It's a pun.
Yeah, if you like.
- Have a drink?
- Okay.
- At the Luco?
- No, "au quai." I'm going back to work.
- "Au quai." Okay.
- Okay.
- Hello.
- A pint, Jacques. Cool, with a head.
A milk with a peel.
- A friendly appeal?
- Oh, yes. A solemn appeal.
- So it's an ample appeal.
- No, a seductive appeal.
It's contagious, isn't it?
"Blah-blah, blah-blah, blah-blah..."
- Hmm.
- What?
Lechery.
Look at that arm.
That belly. That hip. Brilliant.
Don't exaggerate, huh?
Yes, brilliant!
It hose times,
they were all geniuses.
Geniuses!
What's up with you?
Why are you laughing?
No reason. It's silly. I'm laughing
because when I was young...
I thought that "lechery" was "luxury".
- Luxury?
- Yeah, luxury.
I don't know. I was a kid.
I must have been 9 or 10...
because I was taking catechism.
A friend told me that.
A guy named Paul.
Paul something-or-other.
I forgot his name.
For next Friday,
we'll do the 19th lesson.
The Seven Deadly Sins.
Which are, as we saw...
Envy, Sloth, Pride, Anger...
Gluttony, Greed and Lechery.
"In the name of the Father..."
- Hey, Paul!
- What?
Wait for me.
Hello, ma'am.
I would like eucalyptus
cigarettes, please.
- It's not for you, I hope.
- No, it's for my mom. She has asthma.
Here you go.
Myself, I smoke Lucky's.
Tell me, a deadly sin.
Is it a mortal sin?
- Of course.
- Then it's serious.
Sure. For example,
a glutton eats too much.
He has indigestion,
his liver explodes...
he dies
and he goes to hell.
What happens in hell?
In hell? In hell,
you know, it's special.
You still eat. I saw that
in a painting in a museum.
You still eat, but only things
that make you sick, on purpose.
- Thing that are too hot?
- Of course.
And lechery, do you know what that is?
Lechery is luxury.
And it's a capital sin?
- Yeah, it's easy to understand why.
- Why?
Because luxury is money.
When you have money, you say,
"I have capital".
So lechery is a capital sin.
- But you don't die!
- Yes, my father says.
Luxury is killing us.
The fridge, the car--
the proof is car accidents.
He says that's all useless.
Like jewels, furs--
that's useless. That's lechery.
And what about hell?
In hell?
I don't know.
You must have luxury everywhere.
And yet, you must be poor.
It must be very hot.
You must suffocate in those furs.
You must choke with those jewels.
But you know, the furs are moth-eaten
and the jewels are phony.
You must be miserable.
- It's not fun.
- No, it's not fun.
- Good-bye.
- Good-bye.
- Hi, mom.
- Hi, darling.
- Hi, dad.
- Couldn't you come home sooner?
Your sister's been here
for a half an hour.
It was catechism.
The priest went on and on.
Couldn't you say Father,
like everyone else?
- We all say "the priest".
- That's enough.
Your napkin.
I hope you pass
your first communion exam.
Your sister passed the first time.
- This is a time to come home?
- It's catechism.
- The priest went on and on.
- Yes, I know.
But I hope you pass
your first communion exam.
- Yes, mom.
- Your sister passed the first time.
Yes, he knows that.
Like he knows his catechism.
At least, I hope so.
Yes, dad.
The bread.
Oh, my God!
Tell me, dad.
What?
What is lechery?
There, that'll teach you!
- What's happening?
- You didn't hear?
Excuse me. I can't be
in two places at the same time.
Of course, when you dream.
- I dream.
- You dream.
Bernard, stop kicking the table.
Repeat that.
Bernard, listen to your father.
You dream. You'd better take care
of your children's education.
They're your children too.
I dream.
It's too unfair.
- Lechery.
- What do you mean, lechery?
Lechery. Your son wants us
to tell him about lechery.
Lechery?
Bernard, go to bed immediately.
- What about my homework? Shit!
- What did you say?
Bernard. But-- Bernard!
Eve, stay here.
We're doomed not to have
a quiet meal in this house.
So, lechery--
What is it exactly?
Lechery? Well--
Don't make me say
what I don't want to know!
- Where are you going?
- So you're going to clear the table?
No, but take your time.
So you think I have time
to taky my time?
I have a lesson in 15 minutes.
- With who?
- With little Michel.
- He'll just have to wait.
- I won't make him wait.
I'd rather not have lunch
than to make him wait.
- There, that's him.
- Who?
It's Michel.
I didn't have time to get dressed.
"Leafy li-- Leand--
lea-- leath--
leatherwoo--
Dislocate: to pull a bone
out of its socket, contort--
Lechery: vice of those who give
themselves without restraint...
to the pleasures of the flesh.
Lechery is stimulated
by an overabundance of physical power."
"Without restraint
to the pleasures of the flesh."
Flesh. That's meat.
Meat. That's the butcher.
The butcher gives himself without
restraint to the pleasures of the flesh.
Lechery is stimulated by
the overabundance of physical power.
Tell me, were you an idiot,
a retard, or only a cretin?
- No, I was pure and innocent.
- I don't believe you.
Yes, yes. I'm telling you.
There's lechery as I imagine it.
It's nice, isn't it?
"The Garden of Earthly Delights.
Detail from the central panel.
The general theme is carnal love...
of lechery, which blinds mankind...
and distracts him from
the care of his soul."
- Hey, look.
- What?
The girls there.
- A Perrier.
- With lemon?
No, not that one, but that one.
- No?
- Oh, yeah.
Hey, Jacques, where are you?
Oh, nowhere.
I'm thinking.
You see, when I'm looking at things
like that, I'm impressed.
You see, that guy
invented all the rules.
Actually, the surrealists
said this before me.
You could argue that--
Hey! Are you listening,
or are you dreaming?
No, I'm listening. You're right.
You're absolutely right.
Let's make like a banana and split.
- So tell me--
- Yeah?
Now you know what lechery is.
Yes, thanks for your concern.
Hey! Let's get together, soon, huh?
Oh, sorry.
- Whenever you want.
- Caroline! My cousin!
Imagine meeting you in this commotion.
My ideal, my sweetheart, my sister.
Let's commit the incest I've dreamt of
since the maternal breast.
Let's lose ourselves
in this garden of delights--
"Lechery: vice of those who give
themselves without restraint...
to the pleasures of the flesh.
Lechery is stimulated
by an overabundance of physical power."
...Larousse Dictionary.
"SLOTH"
"He sees the explorers for
the first time and doesn't run--
Mr. Constantine!
- Hey, it's Nicole Mirel.
- Yes.
Very pretty, that Chanel dress.
Can you drop me in Paris?
Thank you, you are really swell.
Mr. Constantine.
You don't want to talk to me?
- Mr. Constantine.
- What?
You don't want to talk to me?
Sure. Why?
Oh, I don't know.
You don't say anything?
- Yeah, that's the way it is.
- What way? How?
I'm getting lazy.
Everything tires me.
The sun...
and death:
you don't stare...
directly at them.
Apart from that, what's up?
Oh, nothing special.
That gray suit's
very handsome, you know?
It comes from London.
It's for my next movie.
There's no part for me?
I'd like one very much,
Mr. Constantine.
Yeah, maybe.
- I'm not saying no.
- Me neither.
Okay.
All right.
Where do you live?
Behind the Champs-Elysées.
With your parents?
Yeah, but it's all right.
They're on vacation.
Oh, I have to get gas.
There's a snackbar here.
Mind getting me a sandwich?
Okay.
Okay.
What kind?
White bread with páté.
It's less tiring to chew.
Okay.
Five thousand francs?
Like to make 10,000 francs more?
No. I'm not interested.
What are you thinking about?
Oh. Yes.
Why didn't you turn at Alma?
You should have.
It's hard...
to say.
Everything's okay?
Yes, why?
No reason.
Oh! I have to see
if the workmen are here.
Anybody here?
Nobody?
You don't cut the pages either.
Yes, but I just started reading it.
Oh, good.
You don't cut the pages?
You don't cut the pages?
No.
"Always sleepy, little sleep--"
Don't come out of the kitchen
for twenty minutes.
Yes, Miss.
What are you waiting for,
Mr. Constantine?
Well--
So?
It's too bothersome...
to get dressed afterwards.
That's too much.
Who will dare to say that
idle hands are the devil's workshop?
We just saw, on the contrary...
a sloth so strong
that it overwhelms the other sins.
Isn't that morality?
"PRIDE"
What a successful party.
- Brilliant, absolutely.
- It was a pleasure to meet you.
- Me too, doctor.
- Is it true there are changes...
- in your chain store?
- Oh, yes, it's true.
But I have a much more
important project
I'll probably create
a new chain in Switzerland.
- Can we come and see you, Mr. Lartigue?
- My pleasure.
- Good-bye.
- Good-bye.
You're reckless.
- I hope no one saw you.
- Kiss me.
No. You had to talk to me, Héloise?
- Kiss me and I'll tell you after.
- Listen, it's not the place!
- You're scared?
- Well, Héloise, uh--
That's a name that brings trouble.
- Precisely.
- Precisely what?
I think your wife
has someone tailing me.
Don't be silly.
She has no clue.
She's so faithful
she can't imagine I'm not.
- Then it's my husband.
- Do you have evidence?
No, I have inklings.
- It's great!
- You think that's funny?
I love the risk.
Look here, I'm the one
taking the risk.
Kiss me.
Careful, here comes Catherine.
See you tommorrow.
Like we agreed.
Good-bye, my handsome knight.
I have something important to tell you.
- Did he see you yesterday?
- A glimpse of my back, on the porch.
He couldn't have recognized me.
Tomorrow at six, at the store.
I'll be waiting in my office.
- It's not possible sooner?
- No, it's closing time.
You have to be careful.
Careful.
It looks like my wife disappeared.
You'll find her again.
No one gets lost in Annecy.
- You're making me laugh.
- So laugh.
I'd need to know how.
- Good-bye. It was good to see you.
- Good-bye.
What terrible weather!
Oh, there you are.
Say, your wife and mine
seem to really get along together.
I'll end up being jealous.
It's no big deal. They talk
to each other, but they don't listen!
Let's go out to dinner.
I'm starving.
Excellent idea.
The president may be a brilliant man...
but his buffet reminds me
strangely of the war years.
Magistrates are poor.
Virtue doesn't pay.
Thank God, it's getting rare.
Two pairs of Val d'Isére.
Oh, great. The bell.
Hurry! Hurry up!
- Good-bye, madam.
- Good-bye.
No, Henri, these drawings
aren't right at all.
- I could show you the next collection.
- We'll see about that tomorrow.
- But--
- Good night, Henri.
- Good night.
- Good night, madam.
She's staying after hours.
She's crazy.
If I were the boss's wife,
I wouldn't work, trust me.
- I trust you.
- Rich woman who work...
to kill time,
I find that immoral.
That allows the husband to cheat
on them with a clear conscience.
Come.
It's so good to be alone!
Yes, indeed.
If I were a man,
I'd be a Bolshevik.
- Why?
- To make the revolution.
If I were a man,
I'd rather make love.
And if I were a woman, by the way.
I'm happy you belong to me.
And me alone.
Oh! He gets on my nerves,
watching me like that.
Who?
You were a big hit
at the president's reception.
Everybody was talking about
your summation.
- But I was sad.
- Why?
I wanted to shout out
that you were my lover.
I was so proud of you.
You make me lose my head.
I'd like to be ten minutes younger.
And me, 44 days and 8 hours.
- Why?
- Because that day, in the restaurant...
you smiled at me
for the first time.
How precise a lawyer is.
By the way, what did you have to tell me
that was so important last night?
I'm leaving Annecy tonight
on the 9:03 train.
- Where are you going?
- Where do you think? To Paris.
My boss doesn't pay me
to take vacations.
When are you coming back?
The next time a woman beats her husband
senseless with a curling iron.
- Meaning?
- Meaning never.
So you're walking out on me?
You know I love you.
If that was true, you wouldn't leave.
I'm the only one in love.
- Then leave with me.
- To Paris?
- What about my husband?
- I'll get you a divorce and marry you.
- Say it again.
- Leave with me tonight...
on the 9:03 train,
and I will marry you.
That leaves me how much time
to think it over?
Two hours and 18 minutes.
With the drive and packing,
it's not enough. I need a week.
A week to know if you love me?
You know, I think slowly...
and even when I think,
I don't know what I think!
Listen, Catherine my darling,
I love you. You have to believe me.
I don't want any more of this hiding.
If you love me enough
to leave everything...
eight days won't make a difference.
Otherwise, I'd rather forget you.
Or try, at least.
Have you been suffering?
What about my husband?
He's going to die.
I've rarely seen someone die
because his wife was leaving him.
But he will die. He loves me so much,
the poor man.
And he's faithful.
He couldn't imagine me cheating on him.
- You're thinking?
- No, my leg's gone to sleep.
You know, I'm thinking of something.
If I stay, I make two people unhappy.
You and me.
If I leave, there's only one.
So it's more merciful to leave.
- You'll be on the train tonight?
- Yes.
What if you husband won't let go of you?
Don't worry.
He's having dinner with a salesman.
And I wasn't going
to be home until late.
- Are you happy?
- You're so beautiful.
Give me 22, please.
Hello? Yes, it's me.
You're alone, my love?
Listen, darling. I'm sorry I couldn't
come, but I was with my Swiss banker.
- Goodness.
- No, no.
No, listen.
I have good news for you.
Well, for both of us.
No, even better than that.
Oh, Héloise, you're impossible.
- Héloise.
- No, dear, that's not it.
- That's too much.
- I'm leaving for Geneva tomorrow.
About three days.
I just learned about it.
So listen. Find an excuse
to get away for three days.
Sure, I'll have the time!
You'll see.
Boating on the lake,
fondues at L'Ecu d'Or--
Geneva can be charming
for a lovers' getaway.
Oh, well, if it doesn't work out
with your Aunt Cécile...
I don't know...
just bury any cousin you like!
- Ah, Héloise.
- So, find a way...
and call me back as soon as you can.
I'm not going anywhere.
- No. Catherine's with her committee.
- You'll pay for this, Jean.
- You know her and her good works.
- Héloise.
To do that to me.
That's too much.
Talk to you soon, darling.
Hi, darling.
What about you committee?
I got bored.
And your salesman?
- It was put off.
- That's funny.
Why do you say it's funny?
- I said it was funny?
- Yes.
- That's funny.
- You're weird.
I said it was funny.
Don't make a fuss out of it.
I'm not making a fuss. I--
- You were calling somewhere?
- Yes.
- Yes?
- Yes.
- Where?
- Where?
- Yes, where?
- Where.
To Geneva.
Everyone thinks Geneva is the capital
of Switzerland, but it isn't.
- It's Berne.
- Liar.
Look in the dictionary!
- Dirty liar.
- Well. That's too much.
- Switzerland, Switzerland--
- Look under "H".
H? Oh, for Helvetia.
No. Héloise.
"Héloise: the lower of Abélard."
- Hypocrite!
- Me, a hypocrite?
Who was listening at the door?
I was. But for the first time,
by accident.
Believe me, I regret it.
It was instructive.
So?
I'm listening.
See, I don't even try to deny it.
- That's kind of you.
- It comes naturally.
What's that?
This? A letter.
Oh, okay.
I had a moment of weakness.
The first one.
All the same, I love you. Catherine.
- Yes, in three minutes, you'll propose.
- Propose?
You can't ever trust a man. Ever.
They're all the same!
You know very well
that Héloise means nothing to me.
Oh, so you sleep with her
just to make me mad?
You've got a strange way
of looking at things.
And you, a strange way of doing things.
The whole city must know about it.
- You're crazy.
- You make me ridiculous.
- But nobody knows a thing!
- Are you sure?
- If her husband were to learn, she--
- Don't worry, husbands never learn.
Well, just try it,
you'll see if I find out.
Make a choice. It's her or me.
Answer.
- Hello, Jean.
- Oh, it's you, dear.
You seem surprised to hear me.
No, I was calling to tell you
that I can't give the Thursday dinner.
I'm leaving for Nancy.
Aunt Cécile is very sick.
Oh, you poor dear.
Guess what, I was going
to call you myself.
Yes, I'm leaving for Geneva
tomorrow with Jean.
- What a coincidence!
- I don't see why.
Yes, your aunt being sick
and me leaving on the same day.
Yes, Jean just told me
that he would take me.
What a darling. After five years
od marriage, a real lover's getaway.
Boating on the lake.
And he promised me fondue
in a little inn.
- L'Ecu d'Or.
- L'Ecu d'Or. Do you know it?
How sweet.
Isn't it? Well, take good care
of your aunt.
- I hope she's not contagious.
- Not at all.
That's reassuring.
Well, see you soon, dear.
Please, sir. Get on board.
You're crying?
Please forgive me.
I didn't know you loved me so much.
Pride of a wife.
Pride of a lover.
End result: the husband wins.
It's also moral, in a way.
"GREED"
Attention! Ready, sabers.
Present sabers.
- Send the telegram to the Jacquets?
- I have to go to St. Chamond tomorrow.
- It was good, no?
- No.
Well, you laughed.
- The New Wave.
- It's not even new.
- It's a satire.
- What satyr?
- Gaston, my elastic snapped.
- Your elastic slapped!
If only there were music.
We should have gone to the movies.
Say, madam. It's not right.
I left my flannel vest, too.
I'm not playing games,
I'm working, young man.
Cheaters.
Hey, my little bridge heads.
Thanks to the shortitude of the play...
we still have a little time
to ogle the modern Babylon.
- We have 45 minutes!
- Let's go. In 45 minutes...
the average pedestrian
will cover two and a half miles.
- No!
- What do you mean, no?
- This way.
- Okay.
I went there once.
What's there?
Behinds.
- All by themselves?
- What do you mean, "by themselves"?
- Did you see the radio?
- Which radio?
- In the car. it was on.
- So what?
You're from Pontarlier.
A dame in a car with the radio on...
at this hour, it's clear
that she's a professional.
A professional looking for a john.
Question: a pro in a car,
can you still call her a streetwalker?
There's still the money.
- How much, do you think?
- With a car, 20,000.
No! 5,000 a tire?
You bet. The "rubber"
is the enemy of the good.
- Hi, Napoleon!
- That's funny, huh?
The bazaar, old chap.
It's like a bazaar.
While we're on duty.
So this is the high life, huh?
Lots of pretty creatures here.
Check this out.
- 245 francs.
- No, 240.
Oh, excuse me. 240.
Thank you.
245?
- What's she doing?
- Can't you read?
This machine dispenses mountain air.
Ah! These women of the world.
There! I knew it!
Another one.
- And I took her for a star.
- I don't believe that story.
- The radio!
- So what?
So it's well-known.
It's like a signboard.
But some women like music!
...broadcast at 8:00 P.M.
In other news,
Reims beat le Racing...
by 3 to 0.
The news was brought to you
by Denyl herb tea--
Good evening, beautiful.
Tonight I have to go back,
but another day...
- can I find you here?
- I come by every night at 11:30 sharp.
I appreciate young people,
but my prices aren't set for them.
- How much?
- Fifty.
Fifty-- uh, thousand francs?
- You'll settle for 45?
- My eye. 50, and it's worth it.
- Why are you insulting me?
- Did I insult you?
You said I was worthless.
I'm not.
Oh, I see.
The guy's a joker.
- They're yours, all those cadets?
- Yes.
If you all came...
one each Saturday...
- for the last one. I'll give a deal.
- And for the first one?
So, buddies, it's very simple.
I've never seen a woman like that.
- What was she like?
- Ah! Her eyes--
So she has eyes.
50,000. An engineer doesn't make that
at the beginning.
And you'd like to spend the night
with an engineer?
Even a beginning one?
That's what it comes down to,
supply and demand.
- All the same, 50,000.
- Is it worth it?
- You should have seen her.
- A flower among the flowers.
A Peach Melba among Peach Melbas.
If I had 50,000 francs, I'd go for it.
But look.
I've only got 2,000.
Well, it's a start.
We only have to find 25 times that.
25 of us can go all together!
- Are you all right, buddy?
- I've got an idea!
Gentlemen. This is X,
the unknown object of desire.
Then we have you and me,
or "P", the "Polytechnician"
anxious to devote himself
to this X.
We know the value of X, 50,000 francs.
50,000 francs.
We also know the value of P: zero.
Therefore, the equation P over X
equals zero over 50,000.
Zero divided by 50,000 is--
- Still zero.
- Yes. But!
Is the Polytechnician really zero?
We know, thanks to our colleague,
that P could equal 2,000 francs.
Therefore, P over X equals 2,000...
over 50,000...
equals one over 25.
Does that result, one over 25...
give us a chance
to spend the night with X?
- I see it coming!
- Bravo! To get to one, what do we need?
To multiply. I multiply.
Instead of one Polytechnician,
let's put 25.
Student Whatchamacallit,
2,000 times 25 equals--
- Equals 50,000!
- True enough.
Whatchamacallit, you'll end up
president of the republic.
I end up with 50,000...
over 50,000...
equals one.
X is ours.
- Where do you get those 25?
- There's 528 students in this school.
Seven of us are already convicted.
Six!
Not me.
Ah! We'll convince 19 more.
Each puts in 2,000,
each gets a ticket.
We draw, and the winner gets X.
Spends the night with X.
- And the rest?
- The losers?
In a great victory,
do we count the dead?
The losers will spend the night
with their little cousins.
Proceed!
"The Lottery of X"
Gentlemen, we are going
to proceed with the drawing.
Mr. Scrutineer,
perform your duty.
Who's going to draw?
- You're the one. You had the idea.
- Oh, no, no.
- The most innocent.
- Antoine!
Sixteen.
So, no one has sixteen?
It's me.
Here's our representative.
Let me see your shirt.
You must have put it in cement-mixer.
- No.
- There, take mine.
The shirt is the man.
Take my tie, too.
Watch it, it's not a gift.
Don't give it to her.
She might want a souvenir,
this woman.
You call this a crease?
I call it a rut,
a mountain path.
Too bad, but I need mine.
"The man who lends his trousers
ends up a beggar."
Oh, sublime!
Admirable.
You're swell, guys.
11:30.
There she is.
Come on, go!
And be very polite.
It's a hell of a car.
You want to drive?
Sure.
Go to the Bois de Boulogne.
We'll breathe a little chlorophyl.
Hey! Not so fast!
- You're nice.
- Yeah.
Let's go back.
- Let's go on some more.
- You're not paying for the gas.
Go on some more if you want.
Oh, you're awake. I thought
you would stay for a week.
Here, put this on.
For my modesty.
- One sugar?
- No, three.
Three? Is that the diet
at the Ecole Polytechnique?
No, exactly.
Well, that's enough.
- So, you're from Pontarlier?
- Yeah.
It's a funny coincidence.
I'm from Mont St. Michel.
- You know it?
- No.
You should. It's sweet.
What does your father do in Pontarlier?
- He's a teacher.
- In teaching, in a way.
I knew a teacher.
Physical education.
In teaching, can they afford to give
their kids 50,000 in pocket money?
No, what do you think?
- So?
- So what?
So how did you do it?
- Do you gamble?
- From time to time. Rummy.
You're not going to tell me
you won 50,000 francs at rummy?
- No, of course not.
- So how did you get it?
I'd rather not tell you.
You didn't do something bad, at least.
You didn't steal?
You can tell me.
I'm like a sister now.
- You're gonna be mad.
- I'll be more so if you don't tell.
- We had a lottery.
- You won the lottery?
No, we had one among ourselves.
You remember the other night,
when we saw you?
Oh, the cadets! Where you there?
- Yes.
- I didn't notice you, I'm sorry.
But 50,000 francs--
So, each gave 2,000.
And we drew by lots,
and I won.
A lottery?
For me?
I was the grand prize?
Wow...
that's too sweet!
You can't imagine
how that makes me feel.
Say, that makes me proud.
All those boys--
each one gave 2,000 francs?
Without even being sure of a win?
That's too nice to spoil with money.
- Well, you know--
- No, no. Don't say no.
I'd like it if later,
when you think about me...
you can tell yourself
that it was love...
a moment of love.
And that it didn't cost you a thing!
Here. Take it back.
Take it back--
your 2,000 francs.
My 2,000 francs?
Well?
THE END
Translattion And Subtitles By
Captions, Inc. Los Angeles
"GREED"
"ENVY"
"GLUTTONY"
"LECHERY"
"SLOTH"
"PRIDE"
"ANGER"
And now...
"ANGER"
- How good you look!
- Congratulations!
- I'll think about it.
- What a beautiful day.
- How wonderful!
- Thank you.
- It's very good.
- It's a very good thing.
Thank you.
May the Lord give it back
to you a hundredfold, ma'am.
I do hope so, my friend.
- My respect to your good mother.
- Thank you.
Oh, no, don't trouble yourself.
What a joy to panhandle!
- It's not hot.
- It's not cold.
- My dear, how is your poor husband?
- Well, you know, he's happy.
He's very well-adjusted
to his paralysis.
He's always successful!
So, have you found
a place to stay, my good man?
Yes, a kind soul has taken me in.
Fortunately, there's
no lack of kind souls.
And when you get bored, do
come see us at the station, huh?
I will write them into my will.
Good Sunday!
- Hello, Father.
- Hello, Mr. Teacher. Pray for me.
Oh, it's wonderful!
His mother was from Perpignan.
His father was from Mermignan.
His father was from Brest.
His mother was from Litowsk.
You see? On Sundays,
he only drinks mineral water.
- Alcohol is for weekdays.
- For him, it's the reverse.
Congratulations!
What a beautiful child.
- Oh, a beautiful child!
- He looks good!
Oh, he's very smart. He just got
accepted into superior school.
- Which superior school?
- L'Ecole Anormale.
Happy Sunday.
Happy Sunday.
- Happy Sunday.
- For your wife, with my affection.
For your husband, with my respect.
Excuse me, I'm in a hurry.
Happy Sunday.
Happy Sunday!
- Happy Sunday.
- Happy Sunday.
- Happy Sunday.
- Happy Sunday.
Happy Sunday!
- How about listening to the news?
- It'll be good, as always.
''Hello, dear friends.
I am happy to be with you again.
And I wish you a Happy Sunday.
The news is good. The son
of the chairman of the country board...
who is a great sportsman,
has successfully crossed the Channel...
while swimming the backstroke.
He's climbing the rostrum in the town
square in his brand-new uniform...
of a swimming instructor.
His father, surrounded by
the district officials...
vigorously shakes his hand
as he cries with happiness.
- My little turnip.
- Papadoff, author
of the famous novel...
Let the Little Girls Come Unto Me,
is visiting our town.
- He's also delighted to learn...
- My little turnip.
- that he has won the Prix Femina
for his new novel...
- My chicken.
- Burning Candles at Both Ends.
- My pigeon.
- My dove.
- At his side his beautiful wife Eva...
takes a swim in the pool
of the municipal gardens.
That makes Popoff dance.
- My little flea.
- My little flea!
Meanwhile, the swallows
return with spring.
- My squirrel.
- My kitty.
- My gazelle.
- My cockroach.
The celebration of this year's carnival
has been very successful.
All our schools participated
with the alumni and parents.
We are broadcasting the happiest images
of it to you, dear viewers.
Do you find them entertaining?
Opinions are mixed,
but most are favorable.
We'll do better next year.
The Carnival's master of ceremonies,
its organizer for half a century...
strove mightily for creativity.
Watch how he let his joy explode.
They made him a cake for a reward--
- Let's have lunch.
- Bon appetit.
Let's have lunch with music.''
Oh, more.
More, more.
Oh, more soup!
- More soup!
- Oh, soup!
- Ah. More soup.
- Oh, but it's a spring soup.
But you could say tranks, though.
Thanks, though.
You don't look happy.
What's with you?
It's nothing. I'm used to it.
A fly in my soup, like every Sunday.
A fly in your soup? Liar.
Isn't this a fly?
- What fly?
- This fly. Look!
For 25 years, every Sunday.
I find--
- A fly in his soup!
- A fly in his soup!
A fly, my child,
in my soup.
- Every Sunday, for 25 years--
- You play disgusted.
What a big fuss over a fly!
You're playing disgusted.
You weren't raised in a castle.
I know what your parents were.
- They were what?
- Ragmen.
There are no stupid jobs.
It's an honest career.
It's better to be a ragman
than a procurer.
Aren't you ashamed
to speak ill of my parents?
- Where would you be without my dowry?
- They paid me in counterfeit.
- It was a tidy sum anyway.
- It's no reason to deliberately...
put flies in my soup
every Sunday!
Oh, my uncle warned me you were crazy!
He was right.
Your uncle is a moron, and he's
as senile as your stupid cousin!
My cousin was a Grand Duchess!
He was a sucker.
A real sucker.
- His family--
- They're gallows birds.
Everybody knows that
your great-grandfather...
was a phony panhandler.
And your family was false nobility.
Imposters, Madam.
Your father, your mather.
All of them atheists.
Oh, my daughter!
- Bite him!
- Shit, shit, shit!
- Shit.
- There! There! There!
What?
No, no, no, no, no, no!
And boom!
Help, help, thief!
- Help! Help!
- Thief! Thief!
- Snake! You old snake!
- In the grass, mister.
Ladies and gentlemen, in a few moments,
it will be the end of the world.
Earth!
These are the dangers of Anger.
Let's hope that the other sins
will be less destructive.
"ENVY"
"Inn At The St. Antoine Vineyard"
Is it true that Miss Gerly
is at your place for the weekend?
The actress? That's incredible!
For these people,
every day is the weekend.
You'd see some weird things
there, little Rosette.
If only there weren't
all those beds to make.
Why don't you come and make mine
one of these nights?
No way! What she wants in her bed
is Mr. Jasmin-- no less!
- Or the boss--
- He's never here, so--
- Bye-bye.
- Bye-bye. See you tomorrow.
My poor Jasmin, do you think
I didn't see you playing the Romeo?
But what's with
all those girls, this year?
- What do they see in you?
- They see a handsome man.
Ah, Rosette. If only you would.
Do you know what we'd do together?
Of course, but Mr. Jasmin
mustn't learn about it.
Of course not. We could take a trip.
Do you know the bridge at Tancarville?
Oh, but that's much too far.
Or it's much, much too close.
- Your ambition will be your pitfall.
- Rosette, what are you waiting for?
Mr. Duchemin asked for his breakfast.
Don't forget, Miss Garly
likes it very hot.
"To Mr. and Mrs. Jasmin, at whose place
the rapture of the roses...
gives me rest from the intoxication
of applause: Rita Gerly."
Mr. Duchemin is very lucky
to have it off with Miss Gerly.
It's Jean René Duchemin, you know.
Arras Textiles, Pastis Stimul,
the Paris Group--
I don't know how many newspapers--
If he wanted Mrs. Jasmin,
he would have her!
You! Never at the right time,
never in the right place.
But when we're alone,
you don't do anything!
- We're alone now, Rosette.
- But anyone could come around.
- Mr. Jasmin!
- You're bugging me with Mr. Jasmin.
You're killing me!
You give me so much pleasure.
Why do I love you so much?
Always more.
Why do I find you so handsome?
There's such peace when I'm near you.
- Such happiness.
- You see?
I'd stay near you forever
without doing anything.
Without doing anything?
Tut, tut. What if Mr. Jasmin
were to show up?
No, he didn't call me.
It's too late, isn't it?
Come in.
Do you think so? That's because--
I don't know. It's an idea.
I was counting on it.
Such a lucky break.
Put that down over here, dearie.
No, not there. There!
My name on a Hollywood film,
I'm going to seize that opportunity.
What? Of course.
Put yourself in my shoes.
What are you waiting for?
Give me my bed jacket.
Get to it!
Excuse me, I was talking to the maid.
Of course. Yes.
Certainly.
Yes, of course.
No, not the curtains! The sun,
at this hour? You want to kill me.
Those girls are stupid.
With those people, it's in their blood.
No, not the producer's blood!
Yes. You really think so?
You think there's still hope?
You really think so?
What is envy?
Envy is the sadness we feel
at the happiness of others.
- What is an envious person?
- An envious person is one...
who is sad at the good
and happy at the evil...
which happens to others.
Very good, my little girls.
So, is my bed jacket coming?
Hello? No.
There's another appli--?
Appli-what?
Applicant. Don't tell me
that it's going to be--
Don't tell me.
Why did you tell me?
He told me. Why didn't
you tell me sooner?
You should have told me!
You must tell me everything.
She has no beauty, no talent,
no skill, no boobs, nothing.
The opposite of me.
You talk about an appli-- an appli--
Yes, good-bye my dear, thank you.
I'm completely reassured.
Completely reassured.
Giselle Marinelli.
The Americans should be delirious.
Not that! There, in the cupboard,
down there. I see it from here.
What a moron!
I can stand everything
except stupidity.
There! There!
What are you waiting for?
Go, go!
Mr. Jasmin?
Rosette, I was looking for you.
I have to leave for a moment,
and there's no one in the office.
Miss Gerly is waiting for
a very important call from Hollywood.
If she's not in her room
when the call comes in...
she'll be in the garden
where she'll be sunbathing.
If you want to sunbathe too,
I'll let you do it.
- Did you sleep well, Mr. Verdier?
- Yes and no. You know.
At siesta time, as usual.
Do you understand?
From Hollywood, yes.
Miss Gerly can count on me.
Mr. Verdier, please.
Be quiet!
Hello?
Yes, this is Rita Gerly.
Yes, thank you.
Let me talk to him.
Hello? No. Miss Gerly
is not here anymore.
Nor Mr. Duchemin either.
I don't know. They left this morning
without leaving an address.
Oh, for the film.
Yes, I understand.
I'm sorry. You're welcome, sir.
At your service.
Sometimes, if you weren't so nice,
I wound wonder if you weren't mean.
She's the mean one.
Not mean. Worse. Envious.
You should have heard her
talk about Giselle Marinelli.
Envy is always punished.
It's a very great fault.
Rosette, do you know
what your great fault is?
- No, teacher.
- Listen to what...
my dictionary says about envy,
for you are envious, Rosette.
"Envy: allegorical divinity, daughter
of the river Styx and the night.
Represented with
the features of an old woman.
Ugly and fleshless,
surrounded by serpents,
one of which is gnawing at her heart.
Pale complexion, sunken eyes...
gaze dubious and dark.
Envy is an eminently
concentric passion...
that is, it gathers in the blood
from your extremities...
to the internal organs.
The liver is filled
with a black blood...
the skin takes on a pale color.
The irritation of the bowels
is transmitted to the brain...
as if to make it share its suffering.
From there rise dark
and stormy thoughts...
that finally drive
the envious person...
to melancholia, madness, and death!"
What's the matter?
How funny a penguin
looks in a meadow.
- Where did you lift this from?
- I didn't lift it.
I found it in a trash can.
Look at this jacket, Mr. Jasmin.
It's so chic.
- Very pretty.
- Isn't it late for sunbathing?
- But I couldn't come earlier!
- But are you the boss, or what?
Really, Rosette, I don't
understand you anymore.
You know, I have a buckskin jacket,
if you like that.
Maybe you have a buckskin jacket,
but you'll never have what goes with it.
Who put that record on?
I don't know, Mr. Jasmin.
Change it.
Why always the same people?
Why her, and not me?
It's too unfair.
If only it could be me.
If Mr. Duchemin, with all his millions,
would take me away.
We are very happy to see you
here again, Miss.
Imagine, it was only a year ago that
you did us the honor of working here.
What changes in your life, Miss.
You must be very happy.
Yes, Jasmin. Very happy.
Yes, Jasmin. Very happy.
There's nothing else to wish for.
Nothing at all.
Such is envy...
which carries in itself
its punishment and its poison.
If one has the bellboy,
one wants the billionaire.
If one has the billionaire,
one wants the bellboy.
It's hell.
"GLUTTONY"
Valentin, Jeanne, Nénesse.
A telegram.
- A telegram?
- Alphonse, you old devil.
- My God, it's not for us, I hope.
- Why, couldn't we get a telegram?
- Oh, I'm all shook up.
- Pick up your plate.
- Have a drink.
- I won't say no.
- Cheers, Alphonse.
- To your health, Valentin.
- To our health.
- To yours, Jeanne.
I could use a little drop myself.
- Oh, I'm all shook up.
- All the better!
- I'm all shook up!
- Have a bite.
- My heart's not in it.
- Don't worry, those are kidneys.
Say what you want, no matter how
little you eat, it still picks you up.
Oh, by the way...
Telegram.
- Read it.
- Well, I already read it.
- What, are you reading my mail?
- Well, always the telegrams.
- That's for smoothing things out.
- What things?
- Rough edges.
- Alphonse you old devil.
Quiet, Nénesse! Listen a little.
That's odd, your mother.
We should get her ears unplugged.
Alphonse, we are listening.
"Granddad, indigestion.
Burial Tuesday."
- My jacket.
- You're leaving right away?
- Right away.
- But listen, it's for tomorrow.
- You have the whole day.
- One day, maybe...
but it's 20 miles away!
Women, put on your hats.
Take the car out.
Jeanne! Hitch up the horse.
Nenesse! Pick three chickens.
Bring up the bottles.
Take down the andouilles.
Don't forget the pate!
- Come on. Whoa!
- We don't amount to much, do we?
- Hey, Jeanne! The ham, too!
- Sure, twenty miles.
Giddap. Come on.
Turn your ass, Bijou.
Twenty miles.
I'm thirsty just thinking about it.
Come on, move it, damn it.
- Maybe we could have a drink?
- We mustn't forget the ceremony.
- You're right. Hurry up.
- Maybe a quick one.
Imagine, we have to leave all this.
We're gonna eat cold food!
- Don't tell me about going away.
- Your father's really gone away.
Oh, him. He couldn't stand still.
No, he always had to be different.
- No, he had to--
- Be brave, Valentin.
- Well, well, well.
- You think so, too?
We're going on a beautiful journey
We're going on...
a beautiful journey
Will you have enough?
Oh, well.
We'll have to make do.
Anyway, I'm sure granddad
ate hot food till the end.
Oh, we don't amount to much.
One for the road.
All right.
Let's get going, women.
- It always turns over.
- Don't be reckless, okay?
Fear not, Alphonse.
I put the straps on.
- Good-bye, Valentin.
- Good-bye.
Valentin, good-bye.
Good-bye! Good-bye!
- Good-bye, Alphonse.
- Good-bye, Jeanne, Good-bye, Nénesse.
We're on our way!
Ah, yes. Your father's
now in his grave.
Ah, yes. In his grave.
Makes you hungry. It's noon.
Stop, we have to have a bite.
We just left!
We don't need to stop.
- But where are we?
- Far.
- So you don't want to stop?
- I don't want to louse up my diet.
All right, as you like.
Then you won't complain if I pass out?
- Who, Valentin?
- Watch your mother. She's out of it.
It's always the best ones who go.
- I'm dying of hunger.
- She's dying, she says!
I don't even have time
for a peaceful bite...
and then I have to share it!
You won't deny her
a piece of bread?
At her age, she's eating
other people's bread.
If your father hadn't stuffed himself,
we wouldn't have this foolishness.
Quite right.
Not even the time to get organized.
Forced to hit the road like this!
You don't fit
in your own century, Valentin.
In our days, it's the speed!
Speed and sandwiches.
Can one live with cold food?
No, Valentin.
No, what? Always no!
She's always saying no, your mother.
She's always a contrarian.
And usually, Nénesse, you're
not happy with sandwiches, huh?
Okay, we'll make a fire.
Hello, Valentin!
Ah, Nénesse, I still like you.
I wouldn't say no
Maybe we should tell her
where we're going.
Don't worry her, Jeanne.
We may be sad, but we can have feelings.
The sensations...
the smells!
Oh, that smells good.
There are times when I envy spaniels.
They smell it all.
They don't waste a thing.
All these rich odors!
No, no, I won't go any further.
At least not tonight.
Pass me the pepper. Imagine,
if granddad hadn't died...
I might never have known
what it is to travel.
That's right.
Why don't you say he did well to die?
Absolutely.
Granddad's never been so much with us.
Ah, what a man!
I've never known a man more expert...
in cooking a vol-au-vent,
cutting poultry, or rolling a feuilleté.
Let me tell you, Jeannette...
at this moment, the saints must be
stuffing themselves in paradise.
Let's hit the road, women!
I can't see anymore.
Dump your pipe.
Did you ever see me
dump a pipe in the middle of it?
I don't see a thing.
- Am I driving on the right?
- Stop. I'll take a look.
You're on the left.
Like in England.
Oh, what a trip!
Unload the baskets!
My goodness, it's Alphonse!
Alphonse!
Himself.
My goodness! Valentin!
Are you lost?
- How would I know?
- It's very simple. You follow the road.
- Yes, and I end up in England.
- You think so?
- Do you want a map?
- You're a savior, Alphonse.
It's my job-- letters,
telegrams, maps and calendars--
- So, where are we?
- Let's see, let's see--
We are...
in France.
Paris, where is Paris?
Ah, Alphonse. Paris, huh?
40,000 restaurants.
60,000 bars.
- What do you think of that?
- To go to them all, it would take--
- Oh, it would take--
- No, wait, wait!
- It would take 365 days.
- Right.
That means 52 weeks--
You said 60,000?
- But where the hell are we?
- Well, we must be there.
No, that's Montelimar.
The nougat.
You can go anywhere, Alphonse.
Anywhere. Do you want a madeleine?
- Yes.
- Commercy.
- Andouillettes?
- Troyes.
- Sausages? - Toulouse.
- Jambon de Parme. - Bayonne.
- Cheese?
- Camembert! Port-Salut! Livarot!
- Roquefort.
- Reischoffen! Gravelotte! Verdun!
- Sugared almonds!
- Yes.
Listen, I'm not getting bored,
but I have to deliver a telegram.
- Again?
- Don't worry. It's not the same.
I'll read it to you.
Oh, this one is really--
"Hello, Marcel. Raymonde's Baptism.
Killed the pig. Counting on you."
- Some people are lucky.
- Each to his own fate.
- It's too sad. Let's have a drink.
- No, I have to finish my rounds.
No, it's my round!
- To your health. To yours. To his.
- To ours. To theirs.
To yours!
You're not ashamed? And you,
Nénesse, should be the example.
Let's hit the road.
There's 3 hours left, and 7 miles to go.
- No time to lose.
- What's the time?
Noon. Noon?
- Let's eat.
- It's not noon!
It's always noon by my watch.
Once and for all. Let's eat.
Let's get going.
Well, I'm rushing.
We don't want to miss the ceremony.
No. No way.
Don't want to miss
granddad's burial, huh?
I'll try to drop by later on.
Jeanne, wait for me.
Don't go so fast.
Look! Pears!
The last pears!
We couldn't let them go to waste.
You see, Jeanne,
it's hardest on the ones that stay.
Raspberries, strawberries
The good wine we drank
All together!
Raspberries, strawberries
The good wine we drank
Oh, the pretty village girls
We'll never see again
Oh, granddad.
We won't see him again either!
You crying? Good timing.
We're there.
Oh, how quickly we are gone.
I believe so. Everybody is gone.
How could we be late?
We started in good time.
More than that, we cut corners!
Let's hurry.
We're going to miss everything.
It's over.
Oh, granddad.
Always the same.
- Always in a hurry.
- We still have a chance.
- To the cemetery!
- To the cemetery!
Valentin, it's here.
Coming.
Hey! Look what I found.
Some petit gris escargots.
Not bad, huh?
- You have two bourguignons, too.
- That's right. Put that aside.
So, this is the grave.
I only regret that granddad wasn't here
to eat them with us.
Because with escargots,
granddad was--
- You can't eat snails when you're dead.
- Oh, yeah.
Oh, that's good.
They found a wreath.
No, I'm the one who got it.
- Fortunately, I'm here.
- Oh, Jeanne.
Nénesse!
My little ones!
- What's wrong with him?
- I'll tell you.
What are we doing here?
I'm hungry.
Black is the color
that shows the least dirt.
Huh? Oh, yes.
You can't always do what you want.
Tell me, Mr Swiss Guard,
have you seen the relatives?
That's right. Where's the relatives?
They can't have all died the same day.
Unless there's an epidemic.
- Where did they go?
- Follow me. I'll show you the way.
Oh, that's so kind. In our homeland,
depending on foreigners.
Thank you, Mr. Swiss Guard.
Let's go!
And the family?
What state will they be in?
- Any duck left?
- Yes. Over there.
- Don't get up.
- No trouble. Let me stretch my legs.
Don't worry about them.
You, eat.
You, don't put jam on your paté.
- Here's the duck.
- I'm getting worried.
- Here they are.
- Jeanne, Valentin, Nénesse!
This is the first time
we see you late for lunch!
- How long have you been here?
- Six hours. We were worried stiff.
They've started the appetizers
without me, the bastards.
Come on,
let's start from scratch again.
- I saved you a seat.
- Let's have a shot! Bottoms up!
- May I sit down?
- Have a seat, Mr. Swiss Guard.
- Where are you going, Alphonse?
- Make some room.
Here's to the bride!
- No, granny, it's not a--
- Anthony!
- Yes?
- We didn't tell her. We're sparing her.
It's sad enough as it is.
The chicken's from Angele's.
They're giants.
We have some too,
but they're not as big.
Emile, Ernest, Anthony, cousins.
Granddad, as you well know,
had principles.
Rare beef and tender woodcock.
- Your white wine is excellent.
- It's a Muscadet.
Always at the breach!
He woke at the crack of dawn
to unhook the andouilles.
Always at the breach!
Always with the knife ready to cut.
In 1870, before the Prussians.
In the Great War, before the same.
In '36, before the red peril.
In '40, before the Germans,
and recently, before the yellow peril...
the Algerians, our own generals
and the commies.
He was--
What was I saying?
Oh, yes. He was always full.
Always...
until the day before yesterday.
Never forget his motto:
"You can eat anything."
Bravo! To granddad!
I only regret we don't
see each other more often.
Yes, but you need an occasion.
We won't miss any.
Nénesse, behave yourself
and wait on your neighbors.
Don't you think we have enough misery?
For you, eating is a misery.
To stuff yourself
up to here is a misery?
Look how it ends.
Look, instead, at how it starts.
"LECHERY"
"Censored"
How pretty they are.
- Oh, Bernard. How are you?
- Jacques. How are you?
- Boy, are you messy.
- And, you're ugly.
We look how we look,
but you could get a shave.
- That's life.
- What are you doing?
I'm wandering.
Looking for inspiration.
Oh, inspiration.
Here it is, your inspiration.
Yes, it's her!
Caroline, my cousin.
Imagine meeting you in this street.
My ideal, my sweetheart, my sister.
Let's commit the incest I've dreamt of
since the maternal breast.
- We're made for each other.
- What a naughty boy.
- Want to walk?
- Yeah.
- Are you painting?
- Oh, I'm in pain.
- What about your talents?
- Flown away.
- You should drink.
- I can't. My liver's shot.
- Look at that cruddy painting.
- And it sells.
- By the way, I saw René.
- How is he?
- Same old, same old.
- Still in abstract?
- More than ever.
- It's up to him. How does he look?
He looks more and more
like a Brueghel.
- Bosch.
- What?
Hieronymus Bosch.
Wow, it's expensive.
What should I do?
Take it, or not?
- Tails, I take it.
- You debauch yourself, pal.
- Why?
- You "de-Bosch" yourself. It's a pun.
Yeah, if you like.
- Have a drink?
- Okay.
- At the Luco?
- No, "au quai." I'm going back to work.
- "Au quai." Okay.
- Okay.
- Hello.
- A pint, Jacques. Cool, with a head.
A milk with a peel.
- A friendly appeal?
- Oh, yes. A solemn appeal.
- So it's an ample appeal.
- No, a seductive appeal.
It's contagious, isn't it?
"Blah-blah, blah-blah, blah-blah..."
- Hmm.
- What?
Lechery.
Look at that arm.
That belly. That hip. Brilliant.
Don't exaggerate, huh?
Yes, brilliant!
It hose times,
they were all geniuses.
Geniuses!
What's up with you?
Why are you laughing?
No reason. It's silly. I'm laughing
because when I was young...
I thought that "lechery" was "luxury".
- Luxury?
- Yeah, luxury.
I don't know. I was a kid.
I must have been 9 or 10...
because I was taking catechism.
A friend told me that.
A guy named Paul.
Paul something-or-other.
I forgot his name.
For next Friday,
we'll do the 19th lesson.
The Seven Deadly Sins.
Which are, as we saw...
Envy, Sloth, Pride, Anger...
Gluttony, Greed and Lechery.
"In the name of the Father..."
- Hey, Paul!
- What?
Wait for me.
Hello, ma'am.
I would like eucalyptus
cigarettes, please.
- It's not for you, I hope.
- No, it's for my mom. She has asthma.
Here you go.
Myself, I smoke Lucky's.
Tell me, a deadly sin.
Is it a mortal sin?
- Of course.
- Then it's serious.
Sure. For example,
a glutton eats too much.
He has indigestion,
his liver explodes...
he dies
and he goes to hell.
What happens in hell?
In hell? In hell,
you know, it's special.
You still eat. I saw that
in a painting in a museum.
You still eat, but only things
that make you sick, on purpose.
- Thing that are too hot?
- Of course.
And lechery, do you know what that is?
Lechery is luxury.
And it's a capital sin?
- Yeah, it's easy to understand why.
- Why?
Because luxury is money.
When you have money, you say,
"I have capital".
So lechery is a capital sin.
- But you don't die!
- Yes, my father says.
Luxury is killing us.
The fridge, the car--
the proof is car accidents.
He says that's all useless.
Like jewels, furs--
that's useless. That's lechery.
And what about hell?
In hell?
I don't know.
You must have luxury everywhere.
And yet, you must be poor.
It must be very hot.
You must suffocate in those furs.
You must choke with those jewels.
But you know, the furs are moth-eaten
and the jewels are phony.
You must be miserable.
- It's not fun.
- No, it's not fun.
- Good-bye.
- Good-bye.
- Hi, mom.
- Hi, darling.
- Hi, dad.
- Couldn't you come home sooner?
Your sister's been here
for a half an hour.
It was catechism.
The priest went on and on.
Couldn't you say Father,
like everyone else?
- We all say "the priest".
- That's enough.
Your napkin.
I hope you pass
your first communion exam.
Your sister passed the first time.
- This is a time to come home?
- It's catechism.
- The priest went on and on.
- Yes, I know.
But I hope you pass
your first communion exam.
- Yes, mom.
- Your sister passed the first time.
Yes, he knows that.
Like he knows his catechism.
At least, I hope so.
Yes, dad.
The bread.
Oh, my God!
Tell me, dad.
What?
What is lechery?
There, that'll teach you!
- What's happening?
- You didn't hear?
Excuse me. I can't be
in two places at the same time.
Of course, when you dream.
- I dream.
- You dream.
Bernard, stop kicking the table.
Repeat that.
Bernard, listen to your father.
You dream. You'd better take care
of your children's education.
They're your children too.
I dream.
It's too unfair.
- Lechery.
- What do you mean, lechery?
Lechery. Your son wants us
to tell him about lechery.
Lechery?
Bernard, go to bed immediately.
- What about my homework? Shit!
- What did you say?
Bernard. But-- Bernard!
Eve, stay here.
We're doomed not to have
a quiet meal in this house.
So, lechery--
What is it exactly?
Lechery? Well--
Don't make me say
what I don't want to know!
- Where are you going?
- So you're going to clear the table?
No, but take your time.
So you think I have time
to taky my time?
I have a lesson in 15 minutes.
- With who?
- With little Michel.
- He'll just have to wait.
- I won't make him wait.
I'd rather not have lunch
than to make him wait.
- There, that's him.
- Who?
It's Michel.
I didn't have time to get dressed.
"Leafy li-- Leand--
lea-- leath--
leatherwoo--
Dislocate: to pull a bone
out of its socket, contort--
Lechery: vice of those who give
themselves without restraint...
to the pleasures of the flesh.
Lechery is stimulated
by an overabundance of physical power."
"Without restraint
to the pleasures of the flesh."
Flesh. That's meat.
Meat. That's the butcher.
The butcher gives himself without
restraint to the pleasures of the flesh.
Lechery is stimulated by
the overabundance of physical power.
Tell me, were you an idiot,
a retard, or only a cretin?
- No, I was pure and innocent.
- I don't believe you.
Yes, yes. I'm telling you.
There's lechery as I imagine it.
It's nice, isn't it?
"The Garden of Earthly Delights.
Detail from the central panel.
The general theme is carnal love...
of lechery, which blinds mankind...
and distracts him from
the care of his soul."
- Hey, look.
- What?
The girls there.
- A Perrier.
- With lemon?
No, not that one, but that one.
- No?
- Oh, yeah.
Hey, Jacques, where are you?
Oh, nowhere.
I'm thinking.
You see, when I'm looking at things
like that, I'm impressed.
You see, that guy
invented all the rules.
Actually, the surrealists
said this before me.
You could argue that--
Hey! Are you listening,
or are you dreaming?
No, I'm listening. You're right.
You're absolutely right.
Let's make like a banana and split.
- So tell me--
- Yeah?
Now you know what lechery is.
Yes, thanks for your concern.
Hey! Let's get together, soon, huh?
Oh, sorry.
- Whenever you want.
- Caroline! My cousin!
Imagine meeting you in this commotion.
My ideal, my sweetheart, my sister.
Let's commit the incest I've dreamt of
since the maternal breast.
Let's lose ourselves
in this garden of delights--
"Lechery: vice of those who give
themselves without restraint...
to the pleasures of the flesh.
Lechery is stimulated
by an overabundance of physical power."
...Larousse Dictionary.
"SLOTH"
"He sees the explorers for
the first time and doesn't run--
Mr. Constantine!
- Hey, it's Nicole Mirel.
- Yes.
Very pretty, that Chanel dress.
Can you drop me in Paris?
Thank you, you are really swell.
Mr. Constantine.
You don't want to talk to me?
- Mr. Constantine.
- What?
You don't want to talk to me?
Sure. Why?
Oh, I don't know.
You don't say anything?
- Yeah, that's the way it is.
- What way? How?
I'm getting lazy.
Everything tires me.
The sun...
and death:
you don't stare...
directly at them.
Apart from that, what's up?
Oh, nothing special.
That gray suit's
very handsome, you know?
It comes from London.
It's for my next movie.
There's no part for me?
I'd like one very much,
Mr. Constantine.
Yeah, maybe.
- I'm not saying no.
- Me neither.
Okay.
All right.
Where do you live?
Behind the Champs-Elysées.
With your parents?
Yeah, but it's all right.
They're on vacation.
Oh, I have to get gas.
There's a snackbar here.
Mind getting me a sandwich?
Okay.
Okay.
What kind?
White bread with páté.
It's less tiring to chew.
Okay.
Five thousand francs?
Like to make 10,000 francs more?
No. I'm not interested.
What are you thinking about?
Oh. Yes.
Why didn't you turn at Alma?
You should have.
It's hard...
to say.
Everything's okay?
Yes, why?
No reason.
Oh! I have to see
if the workmen are here.
Anybody here?
Nobody?
You don't cut the pages either.
Yes, but I just started reading it.
Oh, good.
You don't cut the pages?
You don't cut the pages?
No.
"Always sleepy, little sleep--"
Don't come out of the kitchen
for twenty minutes.
Yes, Miss.
What are you waiting for,
Mr. Constantine?
Well--
So?
It's too bothersome...
to get dressed afterwards.
That's too much.
Who will dare to say that
idle hands are the devil's workshop?
We just saw, on the contrary...
a sloth so strong
that it overwhelms the other sins.
Isn't that morality?
"PRIDE"
What a successful party.
- Brilliant, absolutely.
- It was a pleasure to meet you.
- Me too, doctor.
- Is it true there are changes...
- in your chain store?
- Oh, yes, it's true.
But I have a much more
important project
I'll probably create
a new chain in Switzerland.
- Can we come and see you, Mr. Lartigue?
- My pleasure.
- Good-bye.
- Good-bye.
You're reckless.
- I hope no one saw you.
- Kiss me.
No. You had to talk to me, Héloise?
- Kiss me and I'll tell you after.
- Listen, it's not the place!
- You're scared?
- Well, Héloise, uh--
That's a name that brings trouble.
- Precisely.
- Precisely what?
I think your wife
has someone tailing me.
Don't be silly.
She has no clue.
She's so faithful
she can't imagine I'm not.
- Then it's my husband.
- Do you have evidence?
No, I have inklings.
- It's great!
- You think that's funny?
I love the risk.
Look here, I'm the one
taking the risk.
Kiss me.
Careful, here comes Catherine.
See you tommorrow.
Like we agreed.
Good-bye, my handsome knight.
I have something important to tell you.
- Did he see you yesterday?
- A glimpse of my back, on the porch.
He couldn't have recognized me.
Tomorrow at six, at the store.
I'll be waiting in my office.
- It's not possible sooner?
- No, it's closing time.
You have to be careful.
Careful.
It looks like my wife disappeared.
You'll find her again.
No one gets lost in Annecy.
- You're making me laugh.
- So laugh.
I'd need to know how.
- Good-bye. It was good to see you.
- Good-bye.
What terrible weather!
Oh, there you are.
Say, your wife and mine
seem to really get along together.
I'll end up being jealous.
It's no big deal. They talk
to each other, but they don't listen!
Let's go out to dinner.
I'm starving.
Excellent idea.
The president may be a brilliant man...
but his buffet reminds me
strangely of the war years.
Magistrates are poor.
Virtue doesn't pay.
Thank God, it's getting rare.
Two pairs of Val d'Isére.
Oh, great. The bell.
Hurry! Hurry up!
- Good-bye, madam.
- Good-bye.
No, Henri, these drawings
aren't right at all.
- I could show you the next collection.
- We'll see about that tomorrow.
- But--
- Good night, Henri.
- Good night.
- Good night, madam.
She's staying after hours.
She's crazy.
If I were the boss's wife,
I wouldn't work, trust me.
- I trust you.
- Rich woman who work...
to kill time,
I find that immoral.
That allows the husband to cheat
on them with a clear conscience.
Come.
It's so good to be alone!
Yes, indeed.
If I were a man,
I'd be a Bolshevik.
- Why?
- To make the revolution.
If I were a man,
I'd rather make love.
And if I were a woman, by the way.
I'm happy you belong to me.
And me alone.
Oh! He gets on my nerves,
watching me like that.
Who?
You were a big hit
at the president's reception.
Everybody was talking about
your summation.
- But I was sad.
- Why?
I wanted to shout out
that you were my lover.
I was so proud of you.
You make me lose my head.
I'd like to be ten minutes younger.
And me, 44 days and 8 hours.
- Why?
- Because that day, in the restaurant...
you smiled at me
for the first time.
How precise a lawyer is.
By the way, what did you have to tell me
that was so important last night?
I'm leaving Annecy tonight
on the 9:03 train.
- Where are you going?
- Where do you think? To Paris.
My boss doesn't pay me
to take vacations.
When are you coming back?
The next time a woman beats her husband
senseless with a curling iron.
- Meaning?
- Meaning never.
So you're walking out on me?
You know I love you.
If that was true, you wouldn't leave.
I'm the only one in love.
- Then leave with me.
- To Paris?
- What about my husband?
- I'll get you a divorce and marry you.
- Say it again.
- Leave with me tonight...
on the 9:03 train,
and I will marry you.
That leaves me how much time
to think it over?
Two hours and 18 minutes.
With the drive and packing,
it's not enough. I need a week.
A week to know if you love me?
You know, I think slowly...
and even when I think,
I don't know what I think!
Listen, Catherine my darling,
I love you. You have to believe me.
I don't want any more of this hiding.
If you love me enough
to leave everything...
eight days won't make a difference.
Otherwise, I'd rather forget you.
Or try, at least.
Have you been suffering?
What about my husband?
He's going to die.
I've rarely seen someone die
because his wife was leaving him.
But he will die. He loves me so much,
the poor man.
And he's faithful.
He couldn't imagine me cheating on him.
- You're thinking?
- No, my leg's gone to sleep.
You know, I'm thinking of something.
If I stay, I make two people unhappy.
You and me.
If I leave, there's only one.
So it's more merciful to leave.
- You'll be on the train tonight?
- Yes.
What if you husband won't let go of you?
Don't worry.
He's having dinner with a salesman.
And I wasn't going
to be home until late.
- Are you happy?
- You're so beautiful.
Give me 22, please.
Hello? Yes, it's me.
You're alone, my love?
Listen, darling. I'm sorry I couldn't
come, but I was with my Swiss banker.
- Goodness.
- No, no.
No, listen.
I have good news for you.
Well, for both of us.
No, even better than that.
Oh, Héloise, you're impossible.
- Héloise.
- No, dear, that's not it.
- That's too much.
- I'm leaving for Geneva tomorrow.
About three days.
I just learned about it.
So listen. Find an excuse
to get away for three days.
Sure, I'll have the time!
You'll see.
Boating on the lake,
fondues at L'Ecu d'Or--
Geneva can be charming
for a lovers' getaway.
Oh, well, if it doesn't work out
with your Aunt Cécile...
I don't know...
just bury any cousin you like!
- Ah, Héloise.
- So, find a way...
and call me back as soon as you can.
I'm not going anywhere.
- No. Catherine's with her committee.
- You'll pay for this, Jean.
- You know her and her good works.
- Héloise.
To do that to me.
That's too much.
Talk to you soon, darling.
Hi, darling.
What about you committee?
I got bored.
And your salesman?
- It was put off.
- That's funny.
Why do you say it's funny?
- I said it was funny?
- Yes.
- That's funny.
- You're weird.
I said it was funny.
Don't make a fuss out of it.
I'm not making a fuss. I--
- You were calling somewhere?
- Yes.
- Yes?
- Yes.
- Where?
- Where?
- Yes, where?
- Where.
To Geneva.
Everyone thinks Geneva is the capital
of Switzerland, but it isn't.
- It's Berne.
- Liar.
Look in the dictionary!
- Dirty liar.
- Well. That's too much.
- Switzerland, Switzerland--
- Look under "H".
H? Oh, for Helvetia.
No. Héloise.
"Héloise: the lower of Abélard."
- Hypocrite!
- Me, a hypocrite?
Who was listening at the door?
I was. But for the first time,
by accident.
Believe me, I regret it.
It was instructive.
So?
I'm listening.
See, I don't even try to deny it.
- That's kind of you.
- It comes naturally.
What's that?
This? A letter.
Oh, okay.
I had a moment of weakness.
The first one.
All the same, I love you. Catherine.
- Yes, in three minutes, you'll propose.
- Propose?
You can't ever trust a man. Ever.
They're all the same!
You know very well
that Héloise means nothing to me.
Oh, so you sleep with her
just to make me mad?
You've got a strange way
of looking at things.
And you, a strange way of doing things.
The whole city must know about it.
- You're crazy.
- You make me ridiculous.
- But nobody knows a thing!
- Are you sure?
- If her husband were to learn, she--
- Don't worry, husbands never learn.
Well, just try it,
you'll see if I find out.
Make a choice. It's her or me.
Answer.
- Hello, Jean.
- Oh, it's you, dear.
You seem surprised to hear me.
No, I was calling to tell you
that I can't give the Thursday dinner.
I'm leaving for Nancy.
Aunt Cécile is very sick.
Oh, you poor dear.
Guess what, I was going
to call you myself.
Yes, I'm leaving for Geneva
tomorrow with Jean.
- What a coincidence!
- I don't see why.
Yes, your aunt being sick
and me leaving on the same day.
Yes, Jean just told me
that he would take me.
What a darling. After five years
od marriage, a real lover's getaway.
Boating on the lake.
And he promised me fondue
in a little inn.
- L'Ecu d'Or.
- L'Ecu d'Or. Do you know it?
How sweet.
Isn't it? Well, take good care
of your aunt.
- I hope she's not contagious.
- Not at all.
That's reassuring.
Well, see you soon, dear.
Please, sir. Get on board.
You're crying?
Please forgive me.
I didn't know you loved me so much.
Pride of a wife.
Pride of a lover.
End result: the husband wins.
It's also moral, in a way.
"GREED"
Attention! Ready, sabers.
Present sabers.
- Send the telegram to the Jacquets?
- I have to go to St. Chamond tomorrow.
- It was good, no?
- No.
Well, you laughed.
- The New Wave.
- It's not even new.
- It's a satire.
- What satyr?
- Gaston, my elastic snapped.
- Your elastic slapped!
If only there were music.
We should have gone to the movies.
Say, madam. It's not right.
I left my flannel vest, too.
I'm not playing games,
I'm working, young man.
Cheaters.
Hey, my little bridge heads.
Thanks to the shortitude of the play...
we still have a little time
to ogle the modern Babylon.
- We have 45 minutes!
- Let's go. In 45 minutes...
the average pedestrian
will cover two and a half miles.
- No!
- What do you mean, no?
- This way.
- Okay.
I went there once.
What's there?
Behinds.
- All by themselves?
- What do you mean, "by themselves"?
- Did you see the radio?
- Which radio?
- In the car. it was on.
- So what?
You're from Pontarlier.
A dame in a car with the radio on...
at this hour, it's clear
that she's a professional.
A professional looking for a john.
Question: a pro in a car,
can you still call her a streetwalker?
There's still the money.
- How much, do you think?
- With a car, 20,000.
No! 5,000 a tire?
You bet. The "rubber"
is the enemy of the good.
- Hi, Napoleon!
- That's funny, huh?
The bazaar, old chap.
It's like a bazaar.
While we're on duty.
So this is the high life, huh?
Lots of pretty creatures here.
Check this out.
- 245 francs.
- No, 240.
Oh, excuse me. 240.
Thank you.
245?
- What's she doing?
- Can't you read?
This machine dispenses mountain air.
Ah! These women of the world.
There! I knew it!
Another one.
- And I took her for a star.
- I don't believe that story.
- The radio!
- So what?
So it's well-known.
It's like a signboard.
But some women like music!
...broadcast at 8:00 P.M.
In other news,
Reims beat le Racing...
by 3 to 0.
The news was brought to you
by Denyl herb tea--
Good evening, beautiful.
Tonight I have to go back,
but another day...
- can I find you here?
- I come by every night at 11:30 sharp.
I appreciate young people,
but my prices aren't set for them.
- How much?
- Fifty.
Fifty-- uh, thousand francs?
- You'll settle for 45?
- My eye. 50, and it's worth it.
- Why are you insulting me?
- Did I insult you?
You said I was worthless.
I'm not.
Oh, I see.
The guy's a joker.
- They're yours, all those cadets?
- Yes.
If you all came...
one each Saturday...
- for the last one. I'll give a deal.
- And for the first one?
So, buddies, it's very simple.
I've never seen a woman like that.
- What was she like?
- Ah! Her eyes--
So she has eyes.
50,000. An engineer doesn't make that
at the beginning.
And you'd like to spend the night
with an engineer?
Even a beginning one?
That's what it comes down to,
supply and demand.
- All the same, 50,000.
- Is it worth it?
- You should have seen her.
- A flower among the flowers.
A Peach Melba among Peach Melbas.
If I had 50,000 francs, I'd go for it.
But look.
I've only got 2,000.
Well, it's a start.
We only have to find 25 times that.
25 of us can go all together!
- Are you all right, buddy?
- I've got an idea!
Gentlemen. This is X,
the unknown object of desire.
Then we have you and me,
or "P", the "Polytechnician"
anxious to devote himself
to this X.
We know the value of X, 50,000 francs.
50,000 francs.
We also know the value of P: zero.
Therefore, the equation P over X
equals zero over 50,000.
Zero divided by 50,000 is--
- Still zero.
- Yes. But!
Is the Polytechnician really zero?
We know, thanks to our colleague,
that P could equal 2,000 francs.
Therefore, P over X equals 2,000...
over 50,000...
equals one over 25.
Does that result, one over 25...
give us a chance
to spend the night with X?
- I see it coming!
- Bravo! To get to one, what do we need?
To multiply. I multiply.
Instead of one Polytechnician,
let's put 25.
Student Whatchamacallit,
2,000 times 25 equals--
- Equals 50,000!
- True enough.
Whatchamacallit, you'll end up
president of the republic.
I end up with 50,000...
over 50,000...
equals one.
X is ours.
- Where do you get those 25?
- There's 528 students in this school.
Seven of us are already convicted.
Six!
Not me.
Ah! We'll convince 19 more.
Each puts in 2,000,
each gets a ticket.
We draw, and the winner gets X.
Spends the night with X.
- And the rest?
- The losers?
In a great victory,
do we count the dead?
The losers will spend the night
with their little cousins.
Proceed!
"The Lottery of X"
Gentlemen, we are going
to proceed with the drawing.
Mr. Scrutineer,
perform your duty.
Who's going to draw?
- You're the one. You had the idea.
- Oh, no, no.
- The most innocent.
- Antoine!
Sixteen.
So, no one has sixteen?
It's me.
Here's our representative.
Let me see your shirt.
You must have put it in cement-mixer.
- No.
- There, take mine.
The shirt is the man.
Take my tie, too.
Watch it, it's not a gift.
Don't give it to her.
She might want a souvenir,
this woman.
You call this a crease?
I call it a rut,
a mountain path.
Too bad, but I need mine.
"The man who lends his trousers
ends up a beggar."
Oh, sublime!
Admirable.
You're swell, guys.
11:30.
There she is.
Come on, go!
And be very polite.
It's a hell of a car.
You want to drive?
Sure.
Go to the Bois de Boulogne.
We'll breathe a little chlorophyl.
Hey! Not so fast!
- You're nice.
- Yeah.
Let's go back.
- Let's go on some more.
- You're not paying for the gas.
Go on some more if you want.
Oh, you're awake. I thought
you would stay for a week.
Here, put this on.
For my modesty.
- One sugar?
- No, three.
Three? Is that the diet
at the Ecole Polytechnique?
No, exactly.
Well, that's enough.
- So, you're from Pontarlier?
- Yeah.
It's a funny coincidence.
I'm from Mont St. Michel.
- You know it?
- No.
You should. It's sweet.
What does your father do in Pontarlier?
- He's a teacher.
- In teaching, in a way.
I knew a teacher.
Physical education.
In teaching, can they afford to give
their kids 50,000 in pocket money?
No, what do you think?
- So?
- So what?
So how did you do it?
- Do you gamble?
- From time to time. Rummy.
You're not going to tell me
you won 50,000 francs at rummy?
- No, of course not.
- So how did you get it?
I'd rather not tell you.
You didn't do something bad, at least.
You didn't steal?
You can tell me.
I'm like a sister now.
- You're gonna be mad.
- I'll be more so if you don't tell.
- We had a lottery.
- You won the lottery?
No, we had one among ourselves.
You remember the other night,
when we saw you?
Oh, the cadets! Where you there?
- Yes.
- I didn't notice you, I'm sorry.
But 50,000 francs--
So, each gave 2,000.
And we drew by lots,
and I won.
A lottery?
For me?
I was the grand prize?
Wow...
that's too sweet!
You can't imagine
how that makes me feel.
Say, that makes me proud.
All those boys--
each one gave 2,000 francs?
Without even being sure of a win?
That's too nice to spoil with money.
- Well, you know--
- No, no. Don't say no.
I'd like it if later,
when you think about me...
you can tell yourself
that it was love...
a moment of love.
And that it didn't cost you a thing!
Here. Take it back.
Take it back--
your 2,000 francs.
My 2,000 francs?
Well?
THE END
Translattion And Subtitles By
Captions, Inc. Los Angeles