The Rounders (1965) - full transcript

Howdy, boys.

Good mornin'.

Good mornin', Mr. Love.

That's the rough string
you want broke?

Oh, they ain't so rough.

What's that fella doin'
tangled up in that fence?

Him? He's new.

He'll never be old.

See ya around, Mr. Love.

Now wait a minute, boys.

You all are hired on here
as horse tamers.



Well, we just quit.

Look, those animals ain't gonna
be no trouble at all.

Not to a couple of good
horse-handlers like you two.

Oh, there's-- There's one or two
of 'em run out kinda rank,

but most of 'em ponies I had
broke already.

Now,
you take that blaze-face roan

standin' out there
like a milk-pen calf.

Bet he's been rode
a thousand miles.

A-All it'll take is a couple
of saddlin's to gentle him down.

Next time you're in Sedona,
Mr. Love,

you better get your eyes tested.

Mmm?

There's healed-over spur marks
on that old roan's shoulders.

That means only one thing.
Trouble.



Decent outfit'd give a horse
like that away

to keep from cripplin' up
good cowboys.

I'm tellin' you that roan's got
making's of a good rope pony.

Get a little of that
tallow melted down and

I'll probably want him for the
old lady and the kids to ride.

I'm payin' more
than I did last year.

How much?

Say $5 a head?

Seven.

Say six?

Naw, you can get your new man
to do it for that.

Say six and a half?

Seven.

Say seven.

Now get those fellas
out of that corral

and let that string settle down,
huh?

Rafe! You boys pick up your rigs
and walk away.

Glad to have you fellas
back with me again this year.

I was just tellin'
Mrs. Love this mornin'.

"Here it is the day to start
tamin' spoiled horses

"and I haven't heard word one

"from my old friend Ben Jones
or Howdy Lewis

since I bailed 'em out of jail
in Sedona two weeks ago."

You got your bail back.

And we ain't your old friends.

Now how can you say
a thing like that?

Don't all these years
you been bustin' broncs

mean anything to you?

Money.

Just like I said, boys,
as gentle as a milk-pen calf.

See you around in a few days.

I wonder how come people
call him Love?

Maybe 'cause he's so clean.

Cleanest fella I ever seen.

Tailor-made suits,
$60 boots...

Yeah, he gets more work, pays
less than any man I ever saw.

Like now, for instance.

Yeah, like now.

Oh, you must've been a mean
son buck when you were young.

Ow.
This horse is a damn cannibal.

All right, let me have him.

How about that?

Got a good rein on him.

Hey, you know, maybe old Ed Love
wasn't puttin' us on.

Maybe this job'll be about
half as tough as we thought.

You all right, Ben?

Oh, I'm fine.

Just fine.

Rise and shine.
Breakfast in the swamp.

All right.
How do you feel?

Like I'd like to take an ax

and hit that roan
right between the eyes.

Ruin the axe.

Just like that damn Jim Ed
to leave us here

with a pen full
of spoiled horses.

A sharp ax.

Sometimes I get to wishing
I was back wrangling dudes.

Whatever made you quit?

A woman.

A woman?

A woman from back East,
name of Toy Smith.

Well,
that's a mighty pretty name.

A mighty pretty woman.

I was working for the Castle
Rock outfit over near Phoenix.

You know it.
It's one of them fancy spreads

that's catered to rich folks
from back East.

Got them hot springs all around.

Got 'em rocked in
like regular windmill tanks.

You mean kinda like
swimming pools?

You could say that.

Anyway, I had this job
taking the dudes out

for moonlight rides
among the cactus,

and then I'd cook up a meal
on the campfire and...

then play the guitar
and sing something or other.

You sing?

Oh, I just run a bunch of words
together, beat on the strings.

That's how it all started.
Seems this Toy Smith,

she thought I was
a great primitive singer.

Uh, what's that?

Primitive.
How the hell do I know.

Anyway, at night
when my chores were done,

there's Toy hangin' over
the corral gate

waitin' for me to go swimming
in one of them hot water tanks.

She was some swimmer.

And float.

She looked like a mountain range
laying out there on her back.

I swear she followed me every
place I went except the toilet.

Every time we'd have a dance
she'd grab me

and waltz all night.

You couldn't see around her,
and you--

No use looking up with 40 pounds
of her hanging over your head.

All I could do was hold on
and pray.

She was rich and you passed up
a chance to hook onto her?

I didn't exactly
pass it up.

Things happened to alter
the course of true love.

Oh.

It seems like this Toy Smith

wasn't the only one
liked my singing.

This other gal
was about half as big

and twice as pretty.

One night I sent Toy off to bed.
I told her I'd to shoe a horse.

Oh, come on, now. Whoever heard
of shoeing a horse at night?

Toy did.

At least I thought she did
at the time.

I went for a ride and a swim
with this other little thing.

I never figured Toy'd do
what she did.

What was that?

Come at me
with a ball-peen hammer.

Me in the middle
of one of them tanks.

She catch ya?

Do you holes in my skull?

I cleared that water like a duck
with his tail on fire,

grabbed my horse, lit out for
Phoenix and never looked back.

Ah, sometimes I get to wishin',
though,

I'd stayed and faced
ole Toy instead.

If she just hadn't been
so damn fat.

You finish your breakfast while
I start workin' the horses.

What suits you just tickles me
plum to death. Ben...

Tell me why you hirin' on year
after year with Jim Ed Love?

Because one day I'm gonna save
up enough money

to buy myself a boat.

Then I'll find myself a place
where there ain't no grass,

because if there ain't no grass,
there ain't no damned horses.

You can kick the good cowboy

into bein' a crippled-up old man
long before his time.

Do you think
you'll ever make it?

I'll make it.

Ben.

That old roan.
He's thrown you six times now.

You ain't gonna try him
again today, are you?

Have to. He's gaining on me.

That tears it.

I'll take your horse.
Be right back.

I thought you said
you'd be right back?

Time flies.

Now, I hate to do this to you,
horse, but you have thrown,

you've kicked and you have
dragged me for the last time.

Howdy, start the truck.

What are you gonna do?

I'm gonna run over
this knot-head!

Run over him?

Yeah. He tried to kill me,
I'm gonna kill him.

You can't do that!

Oh, can't I?
You just watch and see.

I'm gonna go way back there

and get a good run at him.

He'll never know what hit him.

There's more than one way
to break a horse.

But, Ben!

Ben!

Watch out!

You all right, Ben?

Oh, I'm fine.

Just fine.

Well,
that's the last of 'em.

Well, four days to top out
20 head. That ain't bad.

Yeah--

That is.

Howdy, boys.
How's it coming?

I was getting ready
to bring 'em in.

I was gonna wait at the ranch,
but I couldn't.

Boys, I'm gonna give you
a chance of a lifetime.

A chance to earn more money
than you ever dreamed of.

Pay no attention to him.

I ain't.

Up at the winter camp
there's about

150 or 200 strays
that's gone wild.

I want you to go up
there and spend the winter

gathering that stock in for me.

It's high in elevation, but snow
doesn't stay on the ground.

And besides, it'll be just like
a regular vacation for you.

Suppose you just pay us our
wages, we'll be on our way.

I'd be willing to pay say
$5 a head for all you gather in.

Cows, calves, and steers.

Say $5. Think on it.

Did you ever hear
anything like it?

Well, what do you say?

Well, I say $6.

Seven.

Well, say seven.

Now here's enough money
to buy your winter grub,

and I'm gonna keep what money's
comin' to you

and you can pick it all up in
the spring.

Probably need a wheelbarrow
to haul it away.

And, uh,

by the way, you can take that
rough string along with you.

Give you a chance to work 'em
like they need to be worked.

You know,
sore backs, tender hoofs.

That's what makes gentle horses.

Be seein' ya come spring,
fellas.

Howdy, it comes to me that
we ain't exactly

the smartest cowboys
that ever lived.

You could say that.

Who's comin'?

It's Ben and Howdy.

Ben.

I bet there ain't a rabbit
within five miles of this place.

Howdy, Ben.
Howdy, Howdy.

Where's your Pa?

He went into town to get some
whiskey mash.

He ought to be back soon.

Where you boys headed?

Gonna winter
in high country.

Pick up a few strays
for Jim Ed Love.

He's starving to death.

Like a big fat hog.

Can you stay for supper?

I'll bake you an apple pie.

Whatever suits you just tickles
us plum to death.

Turn your horses loose
in the corral

and pitch 'em some hay
from the stack.

- Much obliged.
- Ben?

Mmm?

It's good to see ya again.

Good to see you too, Meg.

That's what I'd call
real neighborly girls.

And I'd say that
if their Pa didn't make

the best moonshine
in Colfax County.

Coffee, Ben?
Yes, please.

Your daughters are sure
growing up, Vince.

Ha! Should've had boys. Women
are no help at all around here.

They been tryin' to fix
that windmill for a month now.

We used to have two windmills
at our place back home.

Had to tear one of them down.

Wasn't enough wind
to turn 'em both.

You're pullin' my leg,
Howdy.

How's old Jim Ed?

Oh, he's fine.

How much did his calves
weigh out?

Averaged about
400 pounds each.

Man, that's good.
Mmm.

I didn't have no calves to ship
this year.

Business has just been
plum bad.

Gettin' so nobody drinks
anymore.

We do.

You boys, uh,
care for a little snort?

Whatever suits you
just tickles us plum to death.

Yeah.
Excuse me.

Keep your eye out,
old Blue.

Now, down, down.
Watch the steps.

Ah. Get out of there!

Get!

Some fellas know how to make
store-bought clothes.

Some can make lots of money,
like Jim Ed Love,

but there ain't nobody makes
better whiskey than you, Vince.

More?

I don't mind if I do.

Next.

Howdy?

Can I talk to you
man to man?

Shoot.

How come you to have the name
Howdy?

I made it up.

You did?

Why?

Marion.

Marion?

That was my given name.
Marion Lewis.

Man can't ride buckin' horses
for a livin'

with a handle like that,
so I changed it.

Even had it drawn up
and sworn at to make it legal.

Now no matter where I go
or who I meet,

first thing they see me
they say "Howdy." Mmm.

Makes me feel
right off they know me.

Always said you had a friendly
streak in you, Howdy.

Speaking-- Uh,
speaking of being friendly.

Did you see that little old--

Little old blaze-face roan in
that bunch we brought in today?

First thing I noticed
when I drove in.

Did you ever see a running walk
like that?

Did seem he kinda moved easy.

Well, sir, I'd say that that
horse has the best rein of--

Of any horse
that I've ever rode.

- That, if nothin' else.
- Right.

What do you mean,
if nothin' else?

That horse is a--

runs faster than
a thin jackrabbit

and stop before you get
that rein pulled up half tight.

Can I have a little bit more
of that wonderful stuff, Vince?

You know,

a horse like--
Like that would be just fine

for a little outfit like this.

You could work cattle with him,

and you could also just ride him
for p-p-pure pleasure.

Somethin' else too.

When one of those
old hound dogs of yours

takes off after a coyote--

Why, you wanna be there for that
kill so-- Oh, so bad.

Y-You-- Isn't that right?

Sure is.
Right.

I'd kill him with my hands.
Yeah, you--

Well, you wouldn't have to worry
about being there

with that old roan.

But he ain't my horse.

Well, now,
j-just a minute.

That's where you're wrong,
Vince. Because for a--

Ahem. --A slight consideration,

I'm, uh,

I'm gonna give him to you.

I told you I ain't got
a dime to my name.

Ah, sure you didn't think I was
askin' for money, now, did you?

Didn't I?

No, all I want is just--

Just eight jugs of
that wonderful stuff of yours.

Well, I don't know.

It's gonna be a long winter.

And a dry one.

Shh. Listen to that.

Oh, Vince, y-y-you--

You could catch that yappin'
son of a buck

one hour before sunrise

and be there when the dogs
put the bite on him.

What do you say?

I'll do it.

I'll drink to that.

So will I.

Bye, Howdy.

Bye, Ben.

Home.

That high country's where we'll
find most of the strays.

All straight up and down

and covered with buckthorn.

We'll have to dig some ditches
in case it rains.

Water tower's probably got
a hole in it.

We'll have to fix that corral
fence before we bring 'em in.

And cut wood
all winter to keep warm.

Yeah.

If we turn around, we'll be
in Sedona in two days.

Well, let's just keep thinkin'
about all those

back wages we're gonna draw
in the spring, huh?

Sometimes I wished I wasn't
so damn greedy.

Well, at least we got 10
that won't get away.

We got more than that.

Look.

Oh, hi, Vince.

Good to see ya so soon.

Uh, well, you fix your windmill?

How's your girls?
How's business?

You got any new customers for
that wonderful stuff of yours?

How's your girls?
How's your hounds?

Howdy.

I want my whiskey back.

Oh, come on now. You must be
kiddin', Vince.

I am like hell!

Why?

First place, I went huntin'.

I jumped a coyote less than a
half mile from the house,

lined out on him right behind
the hounds.

Well, that's good.

That ain't good at all.

That knot-head ran right past

where the hounds
had that coyote down.

Just kept goin'. I didn't have a
chance to glance at the fight!

Took me three miles
to get him turned.

When I finally got back,
it was all over.

Nothin' left of that coyote but
a little patch of gray.

Next morning I saddled him up
in the corral.

Walked him around,
pretty as you please.

And just when I got to thinkin'
that maybe yesterday

was an accident, it happened!

What happened?
He bucked me off!

Broke down the barn door, and
went to eatin' my whiskey mash!

Well, a spirited horse like that
gets kinda hungry sometimes.

I figured if I couldn't ride
him, I could plow with him.

How'd he work?
Work?

He ran off with the plow,
hung it up on the fence!

Tore out two hundred yards
of good posts and barbed-wire.

Busted up all my harness!

I've been two days and nights
tryin' to put it back together.

And I want my whiskey back!

I can't understand it. He never
gave me any trouble.

No?
Nope.

Then let's see you
get on him and ride him.

Now?

Now.

Why not?

Now, please, just this one time,
don't buck, huh?

See?

Circle him, Ben!

Where you been?

I've-- I've been out there
in the bog.

The only place
I could buck him out.

Where's Vince?

He took his wonderful stuff
and left.

He still mad?

He said he hoped that old roan
kicked your eyeballs out.

Oh.

It's gonna be a long,
dry winter.

All right. Out!

What the hell are you
doin' here, anyway?

There ain't a hen
within forty miles.

You can say that again.

Ben.

Yeah?

How many more head do you
wonder's still up in them hills?

Well, by the tracks,
I'd say at least a hundred.

Do you realize we're just barely
gonna get of here

in time to make the rodeo
in Sedona?

Yeah. I've thought about that.

You sure you're gonna make it
to Tahiti,

or one of them sandy places?

I'll make it.

You still gonna open up
that saloon

with gals in grass skirts
waiting on tables?

I'm gonna drink all day
and hula all night.

I don't see how they can quiver
all over like that

without somethin' comin' off.

Goodnight.

Howdy?

Mm?

The way that old roan
keeps throwin' me...

You think maybe
I'm losin' my touch?

Howdy?

Ben?

Yeah?

You ain't losin' your touch.

Sixty-seven, 68, 69, 70.

All mother cows
and fat calves.

What's wrong with that?

Nothing.

Except that mountain there
is gonna get harder to climb.

There's nothing
in that timber up there now

but long-legged steers
and thin bulls.

And we ain't got any horses
around here fast enough

to get within rope range of 'em.

We got one that can.

Forget it.

Ben, there's probably 50 strays
still up there.

Mmm.
At $7 a head that's--

Howdy! You can talk until
you're blue in the face,

but I'm not throwing my leg
over that no-good roan again.

Not now or ever.
And that is final!

Just look at him, would you?

Walkin' out calm and easy
as you please.

I swear, sometimes he don't seem
like the same animal.

Yeah, you could say that.

You still sore?

Yeah, all over.

You'll feel better when you line
up behind one of them strays.

That one's wilder
than mountain scenery.

You stay here. I'll get him.

Whatever suits you
just tickles me plum to death.

Oh, I'm fine. I'm just--

Oh, boy.

You all right?

How'd I get back here?

I slung you
over the black.

You know, that roan ran me
between those trees on purpose.

It looked that way to me.

Where is he?

He followed us in.
I turned him out in the corral.

You still got that gun
in your bag?

Yeah.
Get it.

But, Ben--
Get it!

You kill that animal, Jim Ed
would make us pay for him.

Yeah.
Probably twice what he's worth.

Maybe even more.

Will it shoot?

Never tried it.

It's Bull.

Compadres!

You all right, Bull?

Oh, I'm all right.
I'm all right.

Come in and join us for a drink?

Huh, friend?
Well, thank you, Ben.

Howdy.

Here we are. Sit
down, huh?

Here we are.
Uh, thank you, Ben.

What brings you
out this way?

Been ridin' bulls in Hi-Lo.

How'd you do?
Fourteenth place.

Saw your truck from the ridge.
What are you doin' here?

We're chasin' strays
for Jim Ed Love.

At $7 a head.
Yeah.

Calves and all?
Calves and all.

It's gonna be an old time
in the hot town come spring.

Ah. How's the wife and kids?

Fine.
How many you got now?

Wives?
Kids.

Ten.
But I ain't been home in a week.

Which reminds me,
I'd better be gettin' on.

Oh, uh-- Uh, sit down, Bull,
I mean, uh...

Well, I see you're still wearing
those, uh, those spike spurs.

Oh, sure.

Yeah.
All the time.

Well, now, how about that?

That really tears an animal up,
doesn't it?

It shows him who's boss too.

Uh, we've been good friends
for quite some time,

uh, isn't that a fact?
Oh, that's a fact, Ben.

Well, now, after all,
we have played poker together

and we've, uh, fist fought,

run women together,

and remember the time in
Hi-Lo when we got thrown in jail

for breaking up that stud poker
game with those Morrison boys?

Yeah, and what we did
in the fountain

in front of the jail
when they let us out?

Oh, boy, that was a real
jellyroll, that was.

Uh, yes, well, now because
of what we've been through,

you know, I'm gonna do
somethin' for you, Bull.

Yes, sir, I'm gonna give you
the greatest gift

that one man
could give another.

You're gonna kill yourself
for me.

No, no,
better than that.

Uh, we have a horse
out there.

It's a roan.

Yeah. Oh, I'd say he's probably
the best piece of horseflesh

in the whole state of Arizona.
Wouldn't you say so, Howdy?

That's a fact.

I'm gonna give him to you.

You're gonna gi--
Right.

I don't know how to thank you,
Ben.

Don't you try. Just
sit and make yourself at home,

Howdy and I'll go,
catch that horse,

load him in your truck and bring
him home to your family. Mm?

I ain't gonna forget this, Ben.

You figure Bull can handle
that old roan?

If he can't ride him,
with as many kids as he's got,

he'll kill him and eat him.

Howdy, Ben.

Howdy, Howdy.

Dad-burnit, that's the second
time I missed today.

What the hell do you think
you're doin'?

You remember me?
I'm Harley Williams.

I push cows for old man Simpson.

Ben asked you what the hell
you think you're doing!

Well, uh, uh,
just gatherin' strays.

Same as you!

With a gun?

Oh, well, I-I just crease 'em,
knock 'em down.

Gives me chance
to get a rope on 'em.

Sure beats wearing out
good horses, don't it?

You saw us comin' at that steer
with a rope, right?

Well, as a matter of truth,
I did, Ben. Uh...

And you let go anyway.

Well, I figured
I'd beat you to him.

Well, I would've
if I hadn't have missed.

Guess I'm shootin' low again.

That's a mighty good-lookin' gun
you got there.

Mind if I take a look at it?
No.

How about that, now.

You say you just crease 'em,
huh?

Across the back of the neck.
Stuns 'em. They snap out of it.

Like huntin' wild horses.

Well, same thing.

You good at huntin' horses,
Harley?

Well, I--
I'd say there's none better.

Well,
I'm glad about that.

All right,
now go hunt your horses.

Hey! Uh--

Y-You ain't gonna go off

and leave us out here
afoot now, are you?

Uh, i-it's 10 miles back--

Hey, hey, it's 10 miles
back to camp!

Turn 'em loose.

If we had a good horse we could
get this brandin' done sooner.

Like that old roan,
for instance?
Hm.

Kind of quiet since
he been gone, ain't it?

Yeah. I can stand it.

Will you look at that?
That iron's cold already.

This is the worst
winter I ever saw.

And the longest.

All them other hands stop
the south roundup

for Jim Ed Love.

Riding easy,
gentle-workin' horses.

Pushin' dry cows and fat bulls.

I bet those boys
been down to Sedona

three or four times
since we been up here.

Yeah.

If I get back to civilization
I'm gonna quit this outfit,

take a job in a fillin' station.

I thought you said you couldn't
stand workin' inside?

Oh, I can't.

It's that damn Apache in me.

Apache?

I ever tell you
I was part Indian?

Oh, everybody I talk to tells
me they're part Indian.

Them redskins get around.

It's my grandpappy
is full-blood.

How much does that make you?

Enough to see a horse coming
from a mile away.

Like that one right over there.

What do you suppose happened?

I don't know.

But I know what's gonna happen.

Come spring I am gonna buy this
no-good animal from Jim Ed Love.

Buy 'em?

Yeah. And I'm gonna load
'em in that truck

I'm gonna take
'em to town,

and I'm gonna sell 'em
to a soap factory.

And then I'm gonna buy the first
cake of soap made out of 'em,

and I'm gonna find myself one
great big manure pile

and I'm gonna wallow
in it for about a week.

And then I'm gonna take
a bath with 'em.

And from then on
every time I wash my hands,

I'm gonna laugh like hell.

That's what I'm gonna do.

I'll open the corral gate.

We go down there shootin', those
strays will never stop running.

The hell you say. Ha-ha.

Ah!

Hyah!

Hyah!

How many head did they run off?

Thirty head, maybe more.

Ask me I say string him up.

No, I have a better idea.

Whoa! Whoa!

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Merry Christmas.

Same here.

I'll bet all the other fellas
are down in Sedona

havin' a big turkey dinner,

passin' out presents,
havin' a fine time.

Most likely.

Howdy, Ben.
Howdy, Howdy.

Merry Christmas.

Who says there ain't
no Santa Claus.

Stay with it, Ben.

Come here.

Merry Christmas.

Haven't changed a bit,
have you, Ben Jones.

Think you can just up and dance
a girl right off her feet.

Kiss her whenever you like.

Are you mad?

I didn't say that.

How long you and Howdy
stayin' up here?

Till spring.

Catching any strays?

Yeah. We got a few.

Ben, how come you
two work for Jim Ed Love?

Oh, you could be top hand
on any outfit in this territory.

Be anything you wanted
to be for that matter.

I know you claim dumb
but you're not. You're smart.

Smartest fella I know.

You don't have to live out of a
pickup truck with nothin'

but a catch rope
and a high-shoulder saddle.

That isn't such
a bad way to live.

If you expect to have
anything of your own it is.

Anything to belong to,
or be proud of.

Wait a minute, now.
Here's the way I figure it.

A man has to get rid
of all that--

All that free and easy
out of his system,

when it comes time
to settle down,

he can lead a--
Well, you know, settle down.

If he don't do that he keeps
lookin' back, figuring

he rode around something better
on the other side of the fence.

Meaning someday you'll take
yourself a wife?

Yeah. Figure to do that someday.

Tsk, it might even be you, Meg.

A man could do a lot worse.

Oh, he could, could he?
Yeah.

You're a pretty good man
with a horse,

but you got a lot
to learn about women.

Ben. Ben. That old roan,

kicked his way through the side,
bit the fiddle player,

and keeled over in the middle
of the dance floor.

Vince?
Yeah.

Where'd you park your truck?

Out by the corral.

Any whiskey mash in it?

Four bags.

Is he dead, Ben?

He's drunk.

Hey, Ben. Look.

I see 'em.

Rafe, you boys cut out what
horses you're gonna use.

Morning, boys.
Did you have a good winter?

Why, it's a good thing
you come along, Mr. Love.

We had one catch-rope left,
we were to have a fight

to see who is gonna
hang.

You wouldn't wanna do that.

Not with all the back wages
you've got coming.

How many strays
did you find?

Hundred and eight.

Good. That's 108 times six.

Seven.

You're right. Times seven.
And that comes to--

Seven hundred
and 56 dollars.

I'm gonna take
your word for that.

Four, five, seven,
and 56.

And 140 for topping out
that rough string.

Well, I forgot all about that.

I suppose you boys will be
in a hurry to get to Sedona,

so I brought my boys to drive
the stock back to the ranch.

Uh, by the way, uh,

what about the calves
that was born in the spring

after the gather?

What about 'em?

You don't expect me to pay for
animals you didn't bring in

do you?

That wasn't part
of the deal, Mr. Love.

We gathered their mamas.

Well, that ain't quite
the same thing.

But, uh, how many?

Ten.

In all?
In all.

Uh-huh. Mm-hm.

That's 60.
That's, uh--

No, that's 70 even.
Mm-hm.

Yes, sir.

There you go.

That does it.

Yup, that does it.

Jim Ed Love, you are the
cheapest man I have ever met.

And if I never work your sorry
outfit again, it'll be too soon.

Same here.

Now wait a minute, boys.

You know I'm always
a reasonable man.

What do you say you get your
trading pants on

and let's make a trade?

What kind of a trade?

Well, say I keep
this $70 for the calves

and you keep that
old roan horse out there.

Huh? What do you say?

Howdy?

Whatever suits you just
tickles me plum to death.

You got yourself a deal.

What's wrong, Ben?

See that sign?
Yeah.

Do you know how many times
we've been to this crossroad?

Every year for the last five
years I can remember.

Yeah. Work all winter,
turn right at that sign,

go into town, spend all
our money in one night,

and end right back
where we started.

Going to work for Jim Ed Love.
Yeah.

Well, it ain't gonna
happen this time.

It ain't?
Nope.

I've been thinking
and I got a plan.

Now, what do suppose
would happen

if we were to go into
the Wildcat Bar,

just before rodeo, and say that
we had an old roping horse

that could throw
any bronc rider in town?

Start a fist fight?

Right.
But before we're finished

we'll have more bets
than we could cover.

We could probably double
our money on that ole roan.

And then do you know
what I'm gonna do?

Yeah, sell him
to a soap factory.

No. No, I've changed
my mind about that.

I am gonna sell him
to a dog food company.

And I'll buy
the first can of food

made out of him,
and get myself

the mangiest old hound dog
I can find.

And I'm gonna feed it to him.

That's what
I'm gonna do.

That's what
I'm gonna do.

Having trouble?

Yeah.

I think it's the carburetor.
The brakes or something.

Mind if we take a look?

- Oh, would you?
- Uh, we can't be out of gas.

We just had the tank
filled back 10 miles.

Huh. Howdy, suppose you
get in and fire up, huh?

Right.

Gee, it's awful nice
of you fellas to stop.

Oh, no trouble at all.

Hold it! Hold it, Howdy.

All right, try it again.

Nope! Nope, nope, nope.
No, afraid it is the carburetor.

Oh, is that bad?

Well, yes, I'm afraid it is.
That's too bad.

I tell you, there is a garage
about four miles down the road.

We're headed in that direction.
We'd be delighted to give you,

uh, ladies a lift.

Oh!

Well, we wouldn't want to put
you fellas to any trouble.

Oh, no trouble.
No trouble at all. Howdy?

No, it'd be just fine.
Fine.

So I says to this big ape,

"If you think my sister and I
came to Las Vegas

"clear from New York City
to be a couple of B girls

"in your crummy joint, ha,
you got another think coming."

Being exotic dancers
is one thing,

but drinking with the customers
is altogether different.

We get along on talent.

We do not
have to depend upon

pushing thin whiskey or rolling
drunks for a living.

- Not anymore
- No, sir.

We got ourselves
a regular act.

Got music written up for it.

Lights, props, everything.

Ah, the days of the plain old
bumps and grinds are gone.

You gotta have a gimmick

if you wanna
get bookings nowadays.

You gotta be exotic.

- It's all the rage.
- A stripper brought it back

from India or one of them
Far East places.

We call our act
the Snakes of Love.

We get into two baskets.

When the curtain goes up,
the clarinet player

starts blowing
this real weird music.

And then we kinda uncoil.

Instead of bumps and grinds

we hiss and strike
at each other.

And when we shed our skin
it brings the house down.

I'll bet it does.

Afraid I got bad news, ladies.
I towed your car in,

but in order to fix it I gotta
drive into Sedona for parts.

How long will that take?

Oh, better part of the day,
maybe longer.

Oh, that means we won't
get out of here till morning.

I'm sorry. Best I can do.

Well, I guess you're
just stuck with us, fellas.

What say we get a bottle or two
and go for a moonlight swim?

In the middle of the day?

Time flies.

What do you think, honey?

Whatever suits you
just tickles me plum to death.

- The game warden.
- Let's get out of here.

Well, that was a close one.
You can come out, girls.

They can't.
Why not?

Look.

And me without my clarinet.

Don't worry. We'll have you
out of there in a minute.

Just wait here.

Ben. Hey, when did you
get back in town?

Arlee, how are you?
Listen, do me a favor, will you?

Sure, right.
See that booth in the corner?

Give me four orders
of ham and eggs

and four coffees.
And you see the waitress there?

Well, I'd like two aprons
just like she's wearing.

What do you want the aprons for?
Don't ask questions.

Just do me a favor this time,
will you? Come on.

These are the last two I got.
Thanks a lot, Arlee.

How do you
want the eggs?

Uh, cooked.

Aprons?

Here, put these on.

Well, how do we look?

I feel a draft.

Come on.

All right, now when I say "now"
jump in the booth, quick.

Now.

We done her.
Yeah.

Oh, Arlee.

Yeah?

Listen, Arlee, will you do me
another favor, please?

Will you run over to the store
and get these ladies dresses?

What color do you want?
Uh, pink.

Uh, any color.
Just so's it's pink.

- Purple'd be just fine for me.
- Okay.

This booth's got splinters.

Will you keep our coffee warm?
We'll be right back.

Well, where you going?

We're going over
to the Wildcat Saloon.

Gotta see a couple of men
about a horse.

Hold it.
Hold it, will you?

Look, I said it once.
I'm gonna say it again.

I'm willing to bet that we have
a broken down old roping horse

there ain't a cowboy
in this town

who's cowboy enough
to ride him.

Fight!

Nineteen, 20.

Coming out of Chute Number 1,

Grady Decker on Upperhand.

Give him a big hand, folks.

That's all the pay
he's gonna get.

Here's one for you.
The S. S. Santa Rio

sails from San Francisco
every two weeks.

It's got a swimming pool,
shuffleboard,

and promenade deck.

Drops anchor at
Hawaii and Tahiti.

And now, ladies and gentlemen,
a special event.

It seems we've got
an old roan roping horse

that's been added to the string
of bucking stock.

An ole roan roping horse that'll
buck off any cowboy in Sedona.

At least,
that's what it says here.

Coming out of Chute Number 2,
on Old Fooler.

Howdy?
Yeah.

What if he don't buck?
What?

Suppose when they open
that chute gate

that damn roan walks out
like a milk-pen calf?

He wouldn't do that.

Oh, he wouldn't?
Just look.

Look at that buck!

He's hurt, Howdy.

What do you think, doc?

Got it in his head
that he's down for good.

Doesn't think he can stand
on his feet. Won't even try.

Look, Ben,

I'd have soon
throw in what money we won

if it'd help get the roan
on his feet again.

Well, we're just
right back where we started.

Always next year.

If it's a question
of money, doc,

we got a little over
400 bucks.

Well, this ole roan
ain't worth that much.

He is to us.

I'm sorry, boys.

Nothing more
can be done for him.

He'll have to be destroyed.

I, uh--

I'll see to it for you,
if you like.

No, I got him into this.
I'll get him out.

Is there anything
we can do, Ben?

No.

You still got that
.44 pistol in the truck?

Get it.

Maybe we ought to wait, Ben.
At least till tomorrow?

Animals are like people.

Feel the morning sun on 'em,
makes 'em forget the hurt.

Makes 'em wanna start over.

Get it.

Gonna be all right. The son
buck's gonna be all right!

I'll kill that knot-head.
So help me I'll kill him.

Four-hundred and 35,
455, uh, 60,

465,

470.

There's 475. That's it.

You expect me to rebuild my
stable on this amount of money?

Well, that's all we got.

That ain't enough.

The vet bill
ran out over a hundred.

I gotta have at least
200 more.

But we don't have it.

I do.

Ha-ha. Howdy, boys. Now, how
much was that again?

Uh, 200, Mr. Love.

Mm-hm. Say, one,

say 200.

Oh, thank you, Mr. Love.

Don't mention it. Phew.

That Tanner's a hard man
to do business with.

Well, you boys
ready to go?

Go where?
Back to the ranch.

Got a new string of broncs
I want you to top out for me.

Just a minute--
It's gonna give you a chance

to work off that $200.
And who knows,

you might even decide to stay
out the winter with me.

Well, see you boys later.

You know, that Jim Ed
ain't such a bad fella.

Feed's good.

Never tells a man how
to top out a rough string.

Stayed out the winter
it'd give us a chance

to go against a few jugs of
Vince Moore's wonderful stuff.

Not to mention
his daughters,

That Aggie ain't
half bad-lookin'

when cold weather sets in.

Howdy.
Huh?

Do you know what
a bronc rider is?

What?

He's a cowboy
with his brains kicked out.

Takes a hard man
to eat boiled owl.

Tsk.

Well, let's go, huh?

Whatever suits you just tickles
me plum to death.