The Reconquest (2016) - full transcript
Manuela and Olmo meet again in a future as they had promised fifteen years earlier as teenagers, when they lived their first love.
I put my heart into the future.
And I wait. That's all.
I would never have imagined you
on a motorbike.
Yeah, well, it's new.
I had a smaller one before.
Do you remember?
What do you mean?
You don't remember.
Go on, open it!
They are looking at us as if to say:
"What are they doing?"
We aren't doing anything strange.
It's too early for dinner
and the restaurant is open.
I didn't call you other times
because I thought it might be too strange.
Why strange?
I don't know.
It's strange, right?
It's always strange with you.
I think of you often
and I wonder
how everything is going for you
what you are doing.
In the movie I have in my head
you are quite happy.
We normally prefer to have
the sensation that stories
never end.
We prefer to imagine,
wondering what might have been.
This morning I went for a walk.
It was cold but it was nice.
The light was lovely.
And I remembered a walk
I took nine years ago,
just before I left.
I think I needed that walk
to convince myself that I was going.
I was unhappy
after what happened with Jaime and
I felt that the only way
to get better was to go.
But to go far away.
I suppose I needed to make
that effort, to demonstrate that...
I had that strength.
I suppose I needed that, it was also
a way of legitimising myself to him.
And to myself.
At the time I didn't tell myself that
was the reason but it pretty much was.
And...
he suddenly appeared one night.
He came to the theatre.
He had bought a ticket
without telling me,
he had arrived in Buenos Aires,
and had worked out where I was acting,
and waited for me there,
on the sidewalk.
And it was quite a shock.
When I saw him there,
in front of me, I think...
we both realized at the same time
that it wasn't going to be easy.
He stayed three days in Buenos Aires
and we...
walked, talked,
slept together, and...
We tried to regain what we had lost.
I think the only thing we got
was the assurance that we had
used up all our possibilities...
And there was nothing left.
It was really quite sad.
But...
now when I think of it
I think it was a good thing.
I think...
from that moment on I could build
a more real life in Buenos Aires.
I began to live
without analysing every gesture
nor thinking about myself through him,
or through the idea I had of myself.
I don't know if I am explaining it well.
Perfectly.
Ok, but I am the one speaking nonstop.
That's bad.
You say something.
Tell me something.
I don't know.
What do you want me to tell you?
-I don't know...
-Would you like to order dinner?
-No, not just yet.
-No.
I would like another beer.
-Beer?
-I'm ok, with my tea, thank you.
Are you still writing?
Yes. I write.
But I am mostly translating.
I make my living translating books.
And now you don't write your own stuff?
Yes, but I like translating.
I don't know...
Translating is also writing.
And you don't have to worry
about creating a new structure,
shaping something new...
You don't have to write
anything too personal.
You like to hide behind
the words of others.
Well...
I like...
to transmit to others
the ideas of others.
I think it's a nice form
of transmission, I like it.
I also give private English classes
to kids.
Thank you.
Well, friends of my parents' kids,
in their houses...
And are you still with...
-Clara?
-Yes.
In fact we have just moved in together.
-To a different apartment.
-How is that?
Good. Really good.
Are you going to have kids?
I think so.
You sound very sure.
Well, she is the one who has more
doubts, about having them now I mean.
I suppose you can have that doubt
when you know you are with the person
you want to have them with.
Sometimes she tells me
the world is shitty
and that we shouldn't collaborate.
That type of thing.
What does she do?
She's a psychiatrist.
Then she should have faith in humanity.
Yes.
It really depends on the day.
She finished her residency
and she started to work in a hospital.
Sometimes she has to do a night shift
and comes home
and she tells me the strangest things...
Actually she tells me less and less...
Are you with anyone at the moment?
No.
Not for quite sometime.
I've had flings and things...
But I've been single for quite sometime.
Well, you never thought couples work...
Why do you say that?
For no reason.
I have to use the bathroom.
Would you like to order dinner?
-No.
-No.
Another tea.
No, do you have... Fernet?
Internet?
No, Fernet Branca.
No, right?
Then I'll have a whisky.
Whisky?
A straight whisky, no ice.
Whatever you have is fine.
-And for you?
-For me...
I don't know.
Do you have any Chinese liquor?
-Rice liquor.
-Rice liquor, perfect.
-Thank you.
-Great.
Fernet is an Italian drink, right?
Yes, but they also drink in Argentina.
It's fashionable there now.
It used to be what old people drank.
It tastes like medicine but it's good.
But it's nothing like whisky.
I don't know why I ordered whisky.
Hey,
I have been thinking
about what you said earlier about
how I don't think the couple works...
-Ah, but you don't need to listen to me.
-No, no, no.
No, it is important,
because it's not true, not at all.
-No?
-No. It's just that...
There is a scientific explanation...
A scientific explanation?
A friends father is a neurologist
and he has always told me
that we are totally autonomous,
profoundly individual.
That there is not one scientific theory
that can defend the idea of the couple.
I think I find the idea of the couple
interesting precisely because of that:
because it is absurd,
because it goes against nature...
And I generally dislike
people who are single.
They all end up seeming egotistical,
or they are crazy,
or they try to occupy their time with
something that gives their life meaning.
It's unhealthy.
And I don't want that.
It's true I am single
and it's scary.
Because you start to like it.
And now I can be with somebody
who I like more and who I like less,
and who gives me what I need
-some nights and some days.
-Right.
-That's nice, right?
-Very nice.
Ok, I am unleashed:
I am rooting like a there's no tomorrow.
Rooting?
Root means to fuck.
Since I arrived in Madrid I have been
with someone different every night,
and tonight it's your turn...
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Shall we order some dinner?
What time is it?
Quarter to nine.
Damn.
It's just that...
You are going to laugh but...
it's just that, as I didn't know
what we were going to do...
-Do you remember my father?
-Of course.
Well he has a gig now, close by
-and I have to go.
-Of course.
It's been ages since I last saw him play
and I was with him yesterday
and I promised him I would go.
But I don't know...
if you want to come,
you are welcome.
If you want...
Is not weird...
Ok.
-Are you sure?
-Yeah, I'm sure.
Ok?
Yeah, it's just that, I have to...
Of course, you have to let Clara know.
Yes, but I can...
I don't know whether to call her or...
And, what will you tell her?
Nothing.
I am going to a gig with you.
Great.
Ok, shall we pay?
Yes, yes of course.
It's funny,
now I like this Christmassy feeling.
The cold, the lights.
The rain.
In Buenos Aires it's summer.
It's very different.
That must be very strange,
Christmas in summer...
Well, for them it's normal.
There are less lights and decorations
and then suddenly you see the typical
image of Santa Claus.
You eat turrón,
but you are swimming in a pool.
Do you fancy some chestnuts?
Chestnuts?
I haven't eaten chestnuts
since I was 11 years old.
I love them.
-Hi.
-A dozen, please.
I am afraid I have lived my life
as if it were a simulation.
And I have been a bad actor
trusting in opening night.
But what life will be prolonged
or have a second performance,
if everything in it is an
improvised and stuffed part.
I am afraid I have spent my life
gathering the courage I lack,
and declaring solemn intentions
in front of the mirror.
Leaving things for a better time
that never arrives.
I have always been distracted
with my mind so far away.
And now it is late,
quite late.
I am afraid I am badly wounded.
I am afraid I have used myself up
as if I
had the talent
to live
twice.
Twice.
I am afraid I have lived my life
as if it were a simulation.
As if I had the talent
to live two lives.
For having left the life that matters
in exchange for a future occasion,
and for having wasted in drafts
the present one.
Thank you very much.
Play This Album!
No, This Album I don't play it.
Never, he never plays it,
it sucks, never.
I am going to play...
An old song
that I composed many years ago.
A romantic song,
perhaps a little corny.
But anyway, she liked it.
It's for a little lady
that's here among us.
I dedicate this especially to her:
We are always beginners.
And now, when they are defeated,
sitting face to face,
which of the two will dare to break
the silence that envelops them?
She delves her gaze to the floor
and he in her eyes, soul inside,
with the hope of reunion.
With the hope of reunion.
Will they able to repeat
the words that lovers say,
and speak them as if
they had never been said before?
These words encompass the world and
the sky belongs to whoever speaks them.
That's why they cost you your life.
That's why they cost you your life.
We are always
beginners.
We are always beginners
and love is never-ending.
Hardships.
This is what it gives us.
Because nobody knows anything
about their own love.
Lo and behold the prisoners
of the eternal ceremony.
How incomprehensible their laws seem,
how faded it remains in memory.
In fact, once I too bore that fire,
and I visited those same quarters
where I loved and sometimes was loved,
where I loved and sometimes was loved.
But time flies
and the sad hour when they drift apart
will soon come.
Maybe time will give them
the wont of a same bed,
the tranquil gardens of boredom
or the hell of weariness.
The river doesn't bring anything else.
The river doesn't bring anything else.
We are always
beginners.
We are always beginners
and love is never-ending.
Hardships.
This is what it gives us.
Because nobody knows anything
about their own love.
No. Nobody knows anything
about their own love.
No. No. Nobody knows anything
about their own love.
Thank you very much.
You are very kind.
I would like to play a new song I have.
Whatever you want!
A new song I wrote not long ago,
-in a hermitage.
-We love you!
-Truckloads!
-Thank you.
It's called
-Arcadia must be blooming.
-The hermitage thing, is it true?
The Joy of Life...
Play! The Joy of Life!
Fragments of a heart,
ashes in the wind,
the diminished piece of,
an old emotion.
Things that are not,
final dry leaves
falling in slow spirals,
soap bubbles.
And you don't even feel sorry...
-Look at them over there.
-...only the sorrow of not feeling pain.
-Who?
-That couple over there.
And, however,
Arcadia must be blooming,
Arcadia must be blooming,
beyond the bronze gates of time...
-How are you?
-Fine.
-Everything ok?
-Yes, great.
-What did you think?
-Great! You were great!
-You didn't like it?
-It was a little tacky.
-No way! It was great!
-I need a drink, but something strong!
Pardon me, excuse me.
Excuse me, please?
-Dad...
-Yes.
Daniela, please, that bottle of Oporto
that's mine, that I have reserved...
Please, that Oporto that's so good.
Dad, I have come with Olmo,
I don't know if you remember him.
-Hi. Nice to meet you.
-Olmo. Nice to meet you, a pleasure.
Congratulations
I really enjoyed the gig.
-Truly congratulations.
-Thanks.
I'm not sure if you remember him,
from high school.
Olmo!
-It's been a long time.
-It has.
Olmo! "Novecento"?
That's me.
What names we used to give back then!
I wanted to call Manuela, Barbara
and her mother insisted on Manuela only
because she was born on the 18th of June.
-The 28th, dad.
-Right, the 28th...
Barbara!
Like the French singer,
my favourite singer.
Barbara, amazing.
I don't know if you like her.
-Yes.
-Would you like an Oporto?
-I'm going to have one.
-No thanks.
-You don't want one?
-No.
I'll have one.
The same bottle please, and in a
wine glass please, never in a tumbler.
I need some air,
I only want the air
that you breathe
and from far away you send me...
This message arrived,
arrived a little late
to see the sun
that is not seen anymore.
Send me a little of your Buenos Aires.
Show me a little of your Buenos Aires.
Tell me a little of your Buenos Aires.
Bring me a little...
air.
What day do you leave?
On the 9th.
After the three wise kings.
But are you ok there?
Yes, I can't complain.
And if I came to Madrid,
I don't really know what I would do.
I don't want to live at my mother's.
I think if I went anywhere,
I would go to Japan.
A totally different culture, a language
that you don't understand at all.
Because you haven't been abroad much,
have you?
No, not really.
Look at that red balloon in the storm,
so pretty.
It's like a sunrise, right?
-What's wrong?
-Nothing...
It's just that I have been thinking
this whole time that...
-What?
-Since you gave me the letter...
it's just, sorry...
I didn't know how to react.
I felt stunned, I didn't know...
I felt like...
I recognized what I read but no...
Don't worry about not remembering.
I don't really remember anything either.
But these days in my mother's house,
going through stuff,
I found loads of our things.
And there are more,
but I found this letter in particular
really funny.
Let's see, give it to me.
-Do you need to reread it?
-Yes, give it to me.
Look: "But we know something that
older people aren't able to know,
not even us when we are older".
-This is great.
-It is.
Yes, yes.
I wish I knew what I meant...
That's just what you meant
that then we were more...
"We could imagine this future
when we are 30", 30 for instance.
"twice our age now,
we will be different,
-as we'll have been through many things".
-If you read it like that,
with that indifference,
with that shitty tone,
-naturally it won't have any charm.
-What tone?
-That's the tone in which I wrote.
-No, that is not the tone!
No, no, no, forget it.
-You wrote it from another place.
-I don't know.
-Read it properly.
-"We could...".
Ok, you read it, let's see...
you know what the tone is, so let's see.
Ok: "The important thing...".
"The important thing
-is to believe in us now..."
-Come on man!
"...because that will
give us strength in the future".
-This seems made up.
-"I think what you see as dark
is life that hasn't happened yet,
like a tunnel..."
"like a tunnel you have to cross but
once across, light will surely return".
-Here you lost it.
-Don't laugh, this is good.
"It's a little scary".
-That metaphor is fine.
-It's a clichéd metaphor.
-I like that part, give it to me,
-No, no, no, it's mine.
-And this is better. No way man.
-No, no.
"...almost two months ago...."
"I don't think we met too early.
I think we met at the best moment
in our lives".
Man, I think you should take that letter
and destroy it so there is no proof.
The strange thing is that you kept it.
Didn't you keep my letters or what?
Well, yes.
I would have to find them.
-You don't know where they are?
-Yes, I would have to find them.
How can you be so faint-hearted
and such an ass?
You know what we should do?
You should go to your house now
and copy out all the letters
from our time together
and you should give them to me tomorrow.
I'm sure they are the only fucking letters
that are worth anything,
as clearly one of us is lame and a dick.
I think that's the perfect excuse
to see each other again,
but let's go and drink something, ok?
-No.
-The night is young.
No, man, I don't want to
drink anything with you.
Yes, come on, let's go to a bar.
-Hi.
-Hi. What would you want to drink?
-Do you have Fernet here?
-Do you have Fernet?
-Yes.
-Yes.
-One.
-Two.
-With Coca Cola?
-Yes.
Sure?
Do you really think that best moment
of your life has already happened?
I don't know.
Yes, it's possible.
12 euros, guys.
-No. I'll pay.
-You'll pay? Thanks!
Thank you.
Half an hour!
I have never told you this,
but when we broke up for good
and you went out with Carlos
I was in such a bad way
-that my mother took me to the doctor.
-No...
They didn't know what to do with me
because I was really depressed
and my mother didn't understand me,
because I didn't tell her anything.
And I remember the doctor.
I was in his office alone
with him and suddenly
he asked me: "What's wrong?".
And I told him: "I am depressed".
And it was the first time I had told
the truth about what was going on.
I told him I was depressed
because I was in love
and it was unrequited
and that was why I was sad.
But it was you who told me
to go out with him.
You were ahead of me,
don't you remember?
I couldn't fight against that.
I didn't cause anything
perhaps I just sped it up.
The only thing you didn't do was to
marry us and be the priest. Fuck off!
Do you see what you are like?
I think that in part I am
who I am thanks to you.
-What?
-In part I am who I am thanks to you.
Or because of you...
In fact I thought I could change
you much more than what I really did.
I wanted to change you that much
but I only changed you this much.
Really?
I followed you and did what I could
but you were, as always,
ahead of everything.
The music you listened to,
your clothes...
The strange thing is
that someone like you would choose me.
You had to be avant-garde in that too.
But what are you saying?
I had no idea about anything.
I knew two things
that I tried to apply as best I could.
But I was really
self-conscious back then.
Excuse me, let me remind you that I was
so timid that when I started school
the teachers called my mother at home.
And said:
"Sorry, but your son can't stay here.
He needs to go
to a special education centre".
They thought I couldn't speak.
I never opened my mouth.
I don't believe you.
-Oh my goodness!
-Oh my goodness!
What are you doing here?
Hey! Cris says we should go somewhere
else. This place is closing now.
Cris is great and it's been ages
since I've seen her.
We are going to a place where
they are going to dance
and if we don't go with them,
they won't let us in.
I don't dance.
I don't like it.
Ok, man, it doesn't matter,
I don't either.
Where would we go?
Why don't you and I
have a drink in another place?
Or buy some beers and drink them
over there in the square?
Yeah, but it's cold...
No, man.
We are going to dance, you will like it.
-Have a little faith.
-Shall we go?
Yes, I am trying to convince him.
-Don't be a dick!
-I don't know how to dance.
-Don't worry.
-Me neither, I have no idea.
-I will teach you.
-He is a teacher and he will teach us.
-Adrian.
-Adrian, that's right.
It's just that I have my motorbike
a bit far away to go and get later...
-I think I'm going to go.
-It's close by.
-A couple of blocks.
-Lets go, ok?
-Yes. Come on, let's go.
-Shall we go?
-Come on.
-Come on, come!
Come on, come on.
You are going to love it, you'll see.
It's really cool!
I don't know how to dance.
I loved it.
You, totally went nuts.
It was amazing.
I didn't expect it.
Fragments of a heart,
ashes in the wind,
the diminished piece of,
an old emotion.
Things that are not,
final dry leaves
falling in slow spirals,
soap bubbles.
And you don't even feel sorry,
only the sorrow of not feeling pain.
And, however,
Arcadia must be blooming,
Arcadia must be blooming,
beyond the bronze gates of time,
Arcadia must be blooming.
But where?
Ashes in the sea
the foam of the water.
Forms of oblivion
that chance forges.
The uncaring passing
of time over things.
Blurry words
that made you cry.
And you don't even feel sorry,
only the sorrow of not feeling pain.
And however,
Arcadia must be blooming,
Arcadia must be blooming,
beyond the bronze
gates of time, my love,
Arcadia must be
blooming.
But, where
is the cherry tree in its splendour?
Where is the golden shepherd?
Where are the red fruits of summer?
Where is your laugh, my love?
Where is the tiger
sleeping next to its prey?
Where is the returning blackbird?
Where is the fountain
of your beautiful hours?
Where are the words you recall?
Where is the bride
who in the green meadow
turns with her eyes still covered?
Where is the rose?
Where is the hawthorn?
Where is the sweetness
of the fountains of flax?
Where is the free will
of all the creatures?
Where is naked innocence.
Arcadia must be blooming,
Arcadia must be blooming.
Beyond the bronze
gates of time, my love,
Arcadia must be
blooming.
But, where?
Where, my love?
You stink.
Go have a shower, ok?
-Good morning.
-Good morning.
You're not going to tell me anything?
How was last night?
Good, good...
A bit... a bit crazy.
But good.
When you texted me that you
were going to her father's gig,
-I thought it was quite surreal.
-It was really surreal.
The people that were at the concert...
It was good to see him.
Remember the book I have
of Leonard Cohen lyrics
translated into Spanish?
He gave it to me.
I found it funny
that they translated
"Givin' me head on the unmade bed"
as "Givin' me heads on the unmade bed".
Later there was
a more careful version,
which was translated well.
"Givin' me a blowjob on the unmade bed".
I think that was my first
instinct as a translator.
A blowjob... Not bad.
So, did you hook up?
No.
No.
But I danced.
-You danced?
-I danced.
With a lawyer.
-With a lawyer?
-A friendly lawyer who told me
that mornings she goes to court
and afternoons she teaches swing-dance.
-Did you dance swing at her father's gig?
-No.
We went to another place where
you have to enter by a small tunnel.
You have to make a phone call to get in.
It was a place with people dancing
and at one point everyone was
clapping and we formed a circle.
People went and danced in the centre.
And I went into the centre.
Actually it was in self defence.
I had no other choice...
I was there in the centre
and I felt a sensation of...
They applauded me!
They applauded me a lot!
Oh my goodness!
And how was it with Manuela?
Good, I don't know.
In fact,
just after we saw each other she gave me
a letter I wrote to her when I was 15.
I didn't remember that letter at all.
What did you write in the letter?
Imagine the things we wrote
when we were 15 years old...
Silly things!
Ok, but if she gave it to you
it must have been important.
No, not really.
I think she gave it to me to
see how I would react.
To provoke me.
First love is always important.
I remember my first boyfriend...
well, "boyfriend".
I had been in love with him since I was
11 and he never paid me any attention.
I'd had a crush on him for years.
We weren't together for very long.
I had idealized him.
And the last time I saw him
we would have been about 19.
And I remember
that I looked at him and thought:
"How can someone change so much
in such a short time ".
I thought he was awful. It was
as though he wasn't the same person.
I don't know.
I looked at him and now nothing...
Now nothing.
Well, from my point of view
she is the same.
Lots of things have happened
after all this time,
but she seems the same to me.
Is she staying a few days
and then going back to Buenos Aires?
She leaves on the 9th.
On the 9th she goes.
Are you going to see her again?
No.
I don't think so.
Ok, shall we go to the exhibition?
-What are you saying, you are exhausted.
-No, I want to go.
Go and get some sleep.
We will see later.
No, no I don't want to sleep.
I want to go with you to the exhibition.
I feel like it.
-Are you sure?
-Of course, we had planned it.
Ok.
-I will have a shower and we'll go.
-Ok.
Are you ready?
-Let's go.
-No. No we're not going.
Sorry.
-I will stay here...
-Go to bed.
-No, I'll stay here.
-Come on!
Do I have to take your shoes off?
What did you do last night?
Nothing.
I had a coffee with Andrea
and I came home.
I was reading The Magic Mountain.
The Magic Mountain.
Yes.
I think I told you.
I have this...
...patient who is obsessed with it.
He reads it and reads it and reads it.
It's the only thing he talks about.
I don't know.
I was curious.
It's interesting
how someone supposedly healthy
can be obsessed
with wanting to be sick,
to be looked after,
to evade the world...
That's good because there
are guys that are extremely jealous.
I am the opposite.
I am never jealous about anything.
Can you give me a drag?
After that he goes and jumps
from a bell-tower.
And then he decides to get hit by car.
-We’ll all meet up there.
-Ok.
And now finally sick of it he says
to the girl: "I think I'm God".
-Who?
-I don't know...
-Hi.
-Let's go to the lake, then you all come?
-Yeah, let's go.
-Ok?
Bye.
-Hi.
-Hi.
-How are you?
-Fine.
Ok, shall we go?
Why didn't you want to go
on the "Top Spin"?
Were you scared?
-Oh my goodness!
-Give him a kiss...
A friend of mine told me that a cousin
of hers worked there last summer
and that she got extra money collecting
the coins on the ground and the grass.
I don't know, I prefer
the ground attractions.
"The tunnel of terror" for example.
I can't stand "The tunnel".
That ride really scares me.
It's not the height,
it's the ideas I have in my head.
I like it.
I mean, I feel
like I have more control.
I go with my feet touching the ground.
Doesn't annoy you that those dicks
push you and shout in your ears?
Perhaps...
But actors that work there are funny,
they do their job well.
You are also quite funny, did you know?
You are boring but funny.
At high school whenever I look at you,
you seem a little absent.
Like in a mysterious way.
To me you only seem happy
when you are playing basketball.
That's cool. You play well.
But I don't know. I always wonder
why you don't talk to people more.
I understand that you are shy, I am shy
too although you don't believe me.
But that is the very reason
I talk nonstop.
This is my theory:
Shy people talk nonstop because
we are afraid of silence.
So if my theory is correct,
you are not strictly a shy person.
You are something else.
That's why you intrigue me.
I actually think you are
quite sure of yourself.
Although you hide it.
-Also you don't have siblings, right?
-No.
You are an only child.
Like me.
They say only children are
a bit more capricious and spoilt.
But that's not always the case.
My mum doesn't care what I do.
I get her attention when I've done
something wrong. She tells me off.
She is the same with my dad.
But my father is a disaster in general.
He's great but he's a disaster.
Sometimes I think it would be better
if they split up.
I don't know why they don't.
I think it's because of me.
Sometimes I feel like saying:
"Hey don't stay together for my sake".
-How do your parents get on?
-They are separated.
-How cool! And how is that?
-Well, I hardly ever see my father.
Right.
Shall we go?
Carlos says we look good together.
You and I?
Yes, you and I.
He told you too?
-Yes.
-Yes?
Yes, more or less.
-More or less?
-More or less.
It's been a cool day.
Yes.
I like talking to you.
And being here with you.
I like it too.
"I am writing to you during the break
because I don't feel like hanging out
and I have to hide it.
I prefer to be here
thinking about us.
I want to tell you
about a book I am reading.
It's one that my mother recommended
telling me that it's not really
appropriate for my age,
that I will have to wait awhile.
Sometimes I think she does it
on purpose, to annoy me,
because as soon as she says that
I want to start reading it at that moment.
It's called A Suspension of Mercy,
the author is Patricia Highsmith.
My mother has a lot
of her books at home,
but this one attracted me
because of the title.
The main character is called Sydney
and he lives in a house
with his girlfriend, Alicia.
It's a detached house,
in a village in England.
At the beginning
they are happy in the house
but they don't have a lot of money
and they live on very little.
Alicia is a painter
but her paintings don't sell.
And Sydney can't manage
to finish his novel
and can't sell the scripts he writes.
And at one point,
Alicia decides to leave for a while.
It's assumed she will go back to her
parents' house till things calm down,
but later it's not so clear.
What happens is that Alicia disappears,
nobody really knows where she has gone.
Not even Sydney.
Then one night the unsettling idea
of taking a rug from the house
and burying it in a forest nearby
occurs to him.
It's quite strange because
while he is carrying the heavy rug,
Sydney starts to imagine
that rolled up in the rug
is Alicia's body.
Although I don't know
if you like this type of story".
"The verse of one
of my father's songs says:
Will they be able to repeat
the words that lovers say
and speak them as if
they had never been said before?
These words encompass the world
and the sky belongs
to whoever speaks them.
That's why they cost you your life.
That's why they cost you your life.
We are always beginners.
We are always beginners
and love is never-ending.
Hardships.
This is what it gives us.
Because nobody knows anything
about their own love".
And now, when they are defeated,
sitting face to face,
which of the two will dare to break
the silence that envelops them?
She delves her gaze to the floor
and he in her eyes, soul inside,
with the hope of reunion,
with the hope of reunion.
Lo and behold the prisoners
of the eternal ceremony.
How incomprehensible their laws seem,
how faded it remains in memory
In fact once I too bore that fire,
and I visited those same quarters
where I loved and sometimes was loved.
Where I loved and sometimes was loved.
We are always
beginners.
We are always beginners
and love is never-ending.
Hardships.
This is what it gives us.
Because nobody knows anything
about their own love.
-Yes?
-Didn't go out?
-No, we are here.
-I have to go. Your father is coming soon.
Ok, bye.
But... don't they mind that we are alone?
If you are 15
and you want to escape
that is enough and more to do it.
You could go before
these city lights
turn off forever.
You can change your name
for another that sounds better.
Finish with your lineage
for once and for all.
You will write in your journal
a new code of honour,
but always in verse, never in prose.
Who would stop you?
Who would stop you?
Who would stop you?
Nobody would stop you.
Who would stop you?
Who would stop you?
Who would stop you?
Nobody would stop you.
Nobody would stop you.
Nobody would stop you.
Yes I'm here. Hello.
How are you?
Fine and you?
-What are you doing?
-I just got back.
-Yeah I know, I timed you.
-And what have you been doing?
-Eating spaghetti.
-How is it?
Cold.
I like hearing you eat.
Please, every day is the same.
Ok, I'm coming!
Are you still there?
Yes.
Do you love me?
I love you.
I love you lots.
"You want me to shut up?
Ok, I will shut up.
but I am going to be a pain in the ass
on paper. Ok?"
"I want you to shut up,
to leave me alone,
to stop looking at me,
to stop talking to me,
although I will regret it".
"Shall we split up?
And everything?
Ok. Here ends our marvellous story.
If you are saying this as a joke
take it back now or shut up forever".
"Before that I should tell you
I have given you gonorrhoea.
And typhus.
Excusez-moi.
And if my kisses were weak,
yours were disgusting
and they made me retch.
I never told you but I closed my eyes
to force myself not to vomit on you.
Respond to that!"
"I only wanted to tell you,
I love you.
I want to spend the rest of my life
with you.
Whatever happens.
I want us to be together forever.
I can easily imagine myself at 80,
sitting on a bench, next to you,
spending the afternoon together.
I can't imagine a future without you".
What's wrong?
Nothing.
It seems to me something is wrong.
I don't know what is wrong with me.
But... has something happened?
No, truly.
It's nothing.
Is it something I've said?
Or have I done something to annoy you?
No, no honestly it isn't you.
It's me. I think...
I think...
I don't know. Sorry.
"Forgive me for everything
that happened before in the park.
I didn't want to worry you
or act like that:
so idiotic and capricious.
Actually I wanted to tell you
anything to calm you,
but the words wouldn't come.
Not like other times.
I am sorry if I made you feel bad.
I love you too much.
It's not my intention to do that to you.
It's just that I've been thinking about
something and I don't know how to stop.
It's something I feel inside,
and it's hurting me.
It's something that has to do with us,
with our love story,
with having met in this moment
of our lives,
when we supposedly have
so much ahead of us.
Laura asked me: "Do you really think
that Olmo is the man of your life?".
And I didn't doubt for a second
in answering: "Of course!".
After that I remembered
what you wrote in the notebook,
that you couldn't imagine
a future without me,
and that you could see yourself with me
when you were 80.
I have to say that made a bit
of an impression on me.
Actually, a lot.
I liked reading it,
but at the same time it scared me.
It made me think
about everything that means,
about what it means for you
to have written that,
because I know you don't write
the first thing that pops into your head.
What I want to tell you
is that I am scared of all the things
we could lose from now on.
Because if our plan is to live together
for the rest of our lives,
I think it will be difficult
not to miss out on all those other things.
And I can tell that
lots of things will happen.
Good and bad things.
Things that we can't control
and at times we won't be prepared for.
These things will come and they will
make us stronger, that's all.
It's like the feeling I had
with the story of Alicia and Sydney.
Although you see it another way,
I think Alicia left Sydney
because she had to,
because she needed something else.
At some point we all
need something more,
or simply stop needing something
for a time,
don't you think?
Most probably with the passing of time
we will have the crazy
sensation of returning here.
I think I am saying goodbye
so as not to make your life miserable,
so as not to make my life miserable,
thinking that this could've been
a beautiful love letter.
That was its intention.
Not everything is as dark as I see it,
right?"
"I read your letter
as soon as I arrived home,
just like you asked.
It was strange because in someway
I knew what I would find inside.
Although it seems like a sad letter,
I don't think it is.
Like everything you give me,
it has something of a challenge or bet
because you believe in me and in us.
You ask me if I believe in destiny
and I think I do.
Actually I believe I have never
asked myself that before,
but since you appeared in my life
I can only believe in the luck I have
and I am only worried about losing it.
I think that something similar
happened to you,
and this is what you wanted to tell me
in the letter.
But we know something
older people aren't able to know.
Not even us when we are older.
The important thing
is to believe in us now
because that will give us
strength in the future.
We could imagine this future,
when we are 30, for instance,
twice our age now,
we will be different, as we'll
have been through many things.
Maybe we will have lost our luck,
but we'll always be able to get it back
if we keep something of ourselves now.
I think what you see as dark
is life that hasn't happened yet,
like a tunnel you have to cross.
Once across
light will surely return.
It's a little scary
because you don't know what's inside.
There will be all sorts I am sure,
good things and bad like you said.
You know I like to imagine things.
I DON'T THINK WE HAVE MET
IN THE WRONG MOMENT,
I THINK WE HAVE MET
IN THE BEST MOMENT OF OUR LIVES...
I WILL NEVER FORGET YOU.
SO... I WANT YOU TO KNOW
THAT YOU WILL ALWAYS FIND ME
IN THIS MOMENT.
THE RECONQUEST
If you are 15
and you want to escape,
that is enough and more to do it.
You could go before these city lights
turn off forever.
You can change your name
for another that sounds better,
finish with your lineage
for once and for all.
You will write in your journal
a new code of honour
but always in verse, never in prose.
Who would stop you,
who would stop you,
who would stop you:
nobody would stop you.
Who would stop you,
who would stop you,
who would stop you:
nobody would stop you.
Nobody would stop you.
Nobody would stop you.
You’d take the road
that runs far from the sidewalk,
the one the unrepentant ones take.
You might see in things
things you couldn’t see before
and even awake you’d be asleep.
Seasons will pass
and you will forget to speak,
you will forget your own memory.
Inspired in the brave
with the same dignity,
like he who cuts a rose
you could melt in the ground.
But one never decides.
But one never decides.
But one never decides.
A man never decides.
However:
Who would stop you,
who would stop you,
who would stop you:
nobody would stop you.
Who would stop you,
who would stop you,
who would stop you:
nobody would stop you.
FILMED IN MADRID
And I wait. That's all.
I would never have imagined you
on a motorbike.
Yeah, well, it's new.
I had a smaller one before.
Do you remember?
What do you mean?
You don't remember.
Go on, open it!
They are looking at us as if to say:
"What are they doing?"
We aren't doing anything strange.
It's too early for dinner
and the restaurant is open.
I didn't call you other times
because I thought it might be too strange.
Why strange?
I don't know.
It's strange, right?
It's always strange with you.
I think of you often
and I wonder
how everything is going for you
what you are doing.
In the movie I have in my head
you are quite happy.
We normally prefer to have
the sensation that stories
never end.
We prefer to imagine,
wondering what might have been.
This morning I went for a walk.
It was cold but it was nice.
The light was lovely.
And I remembered a walk
I took nine years ago,
just before I left.
I think I needed that walk
to convince myself that I was going.
I was unhappy
after what happened with Jaime and
I felt that the only way
to get better was to go.
But to go far away.
I suppose I needed to make
that effort, to demonstrate that...
I had that strength.
I suppose I needed that, it was also
a way of legitimising myself to him.
And to myself.
At the time I didn't tell myself that
was the reason but it pretty much was.
And...
he suddenly appeared one night.
He came to the theatre.
He had bought a ticket
without telling me,
he had arrived in Buenos Aires,
and had worked out where I was acting,
and waited for me there,
on the sidewalk.
And it was quite a shock.
When I saw him there,
in front of me, I think...
we both realized at the same time
that it wasn't going to be easy.
He stayed three days in Buenos Aires
and we...
walked, talked,
slept together, and...
We tried to regain what we had lost.
I think the only thing we got
was the assurance that we had
used up all our possibilities...
And there was nothing left.
It was really quite sad.
But...
now when I think of it
I think it was a good thing.
I think...
from that moment on I could build
a more real life in Buenos Aires.
I began to live
without analysing every gesture
nor thinking about myself through him,
or through the idea I had of myself.
I don't know if I am explaining it well.
Perfectly.
Ok, but I am the one speaking nonstop.
That's bad.
You say something.
Tell me something.
I don't know.
What do you want me to tell you?
-I don't know...
-Would you like to order dinner?
-No, not just yet.
-No.
I would like another beer.
-Beer?
-I'm ok, with my tea, thank you.
Are you still writing?
Yes. I write.
But I am mostly translating.
I make my living translating books.
And now you don't write your own stuff?
Yes, but I like translating.
I don't know...
Translating is also writing.
And you don't have to worry
about creating a new structure,
shaping something new...
You don't have to write
anything too personal.
You like to hide behind
the words of others.
Well...
I like...
to transmit to others
the ideas of others.
I think it's a nice form
of transmission, I like it.
I also give private English classes
to kids.
Thank you.
Well, friends of my parents' kids,
in their houses...
And are you still with...
-Clara?
-Yes.
In fact we have just moved in together.
-To a different apartment.
-How is that?
Good. Really good.
Are you going to have kids?
I think so.
You sound very sure.
Well, she is the one who has more
doubts, about having them now I mean.
I suppose you can have that doubt
when you know you are with the person
you want to have them with.
Sometimes she tells me
the world is shitty
and that we shouldn't collaborate.
That type of thing.
What does she do?
She's a psychiatrist.
Then she should have faith in humanity.
Yes.
It really depends on the day.
She finished her residency
and she started to work in a hospital.
Sometimes she has to do a night shift
and comes home
and she tells me the strangest things...
Actually she tells me less and less...
Are you with anyone at the moment?
No.
Not for quite sometime.
I've had flings and things...
But I've been single for quite sometime.
Well, you never thought couples work...
Why do you say that?
For no reason.
I have to use the bathroom.
Would you like to order dinner?
-No.
-No.
Another tea.
No, do you have... Fernet?
Internet?
No, Fernet Branca.
No, right?
Then I'll have a whisky.
Whisky?
A straight whisky, no ice.
Whatever you have is fine.
-And for you?
-For me...
I don't know.
Do you have any Chinese liquor?
-Rice liquor.
-Rice liquor, perfect.
-Thank you.
-Great.
Fernet is an Italian drink, right?
Yes, but they also drink in Argentina.
It's fashionable there now.
It used to be what old people drank.
It tastes like medicine but it's good.
But it's nothing like whisky.
I don't know why I ordered whisky.
Hey,
I have been thinking
about what you said earlier about
how I don't think the couple works...
-Ah, but you don't need to listen to me.
-No, no, no.
No, it is important,
because it's not true, not at all.
-No?
-No. It's just that...
There is a scientific explanation...
A scientific explanation?
A friends father is a neurologist
and he has always told me
that we are totally autonomous,
profoundly individual.
That there is not one scientific theory
that can defend the idea of the couple.
I think I find the idea of the couple
interesting precisely because of that:
because it is absurd,
because it goes against nature...
And I generally dislike
people who are single.
They all end up seeming egotistical,
or they are crazy,
or they try to occupy their time with
something that gives their life meaning.
It's unhealthy.
And I don't want that.
It's true I am single
and it's scary.
Because you start to like it.
And now I can be with somebody
who I like more and who I like less,
and who gives me what I need
-some nights and some days.
-Right.
-That's nice, right?
-Very nice.
Ok, I am unleashed:
I am rooting like a there's no tomorrow.
Rooting?
Root means to fuck.
Since I arrived in Madrid I have been
with someone different every night,
and tonight it's your turn...
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Shall we order some dinner?
What time is it?
Quarter to nine.
Damn.
It's just that...
You are going to laugh but...
it's just that, as I didn't know
what we were going to do...
-Do you remember my father?
-Of course.
Well he has a gig now, close by
-and I have to go.
-Of course.
It's been ages since I last saw him play
and I was with him yesterday
and I promised him I would go.
But I don't know...
if you want to come,
you are welcome.
If you want...
Is not weird...
Ok.
-Are you sure?
-Yeah, I'm sure.
Ok?
Yeah, it's just that, I have to...
Of course, you have to let Clara know.
Yes, but I can...
I don't know whether to call her or...
And, what will you tell her?
Nothing.
I am going to a gig with you.
Great.
Ok, shall we pay?
Yes, yes of course.
It's funny,
now I like this Christmassy feeling.
The cold, the lights.
The rain.
In Buenos Aires it's summer.
It's very different.
That must be very strange,
Christmas in summer...
Well, for them it's normal.
There are less lights and decorations
and then suddenly you see the typical
image of Santa Claus.
You eat turrón,
but you are swimming in a pool.
Do you fancy some chestnuts?
Chestnuts?
I haven't eaten chestnuts
since I was 11 years old.
I love them.
-Hi.
-A dozen, please.
I am afraid I have lived my life
as if it were a simulation.
And I have been a bad actor
trusting in opening night.
But what life will be prolonged
or have a second performance,
if everything in it is an
improvised and stuffed part.
I am afraid I have spent my life
gathering the courage I lack,
and declaring solemn intentions
in front of the mirror.
Leaving things for a better time
that never arrives.
I have always been distracted
with my mind so far away.
And now it is late,
quite late.
I am afraid I am badly wounded.
I am afraid I have used myself up
as if I
had the talent
to live
twice.
Twice.
I am afraid I have lived my life
as if it were a simulation.
As if I had the talent
to live two lives.
For having left the life that matters
in exchange for a future occasion,
and for having wasted in drafts
the present one.
Thank you very much.
Play This Album!
No, This Album I don't play it.
Never, he never plays it,
it sucks, never.
I am going to play...
An old song
that I composed many years ago.
A romantic song,
perhaps a little corny.
But anyway, she liked it.
It's for a little lady
that's here among us.
I dedicate this especially to her:
We are always beginners.
And now, when they are defeated,
sitting face to face,
which of the two will dare to break
the silence that envelops them?
She delves her gaze to the floor
and he in her eyes, soul inside,
with the hope of reunion.
With the hope of reunion.
Will they able to repeat
the words that lovers say,
and speak them as if
they had never been said before?
These words encompass the world and
the sky belongs to whoever speaks them.
That's why they cost you your life.
That's why they cost you your life.
We are always
beginners.
We are always beginners
and love is never-ending.
Hardships.
This is what it gives us.
Because nobody knows anything
about their own love.
Lo and behold the prisoners
of the eternal ceremony.
How incomprehensible their laws seem,
how faded it remains in memory.
In fact, once I too bore that fire,
and I visited those same quarters
where I loved and sometimes was loved,
where I loved and sometimes was loved.
But time flies
and the sad hour when they drift apart
will soon come.
Maybe time will give them
the wont of a same bed,
the tranquil gardens of boredom
or the hell of weariness.
The river doesn't bring anything else.
The river doesn't bring anything else.
We are always
beginners.
We are always beginners
and love is never-ending.
Hardships.
This is what it gives us.
Because nobody knows anything
about their own love.
No. Nobody knows anything
about their own love.
No. No. Nobody knows anything
about their own love.
Thank you very much.
You are very kind.
I would like to play a new song I have.
Whatever you want!
A new song I wrote not long ago,
-in a hermitage.
-We love you!
-Truckloads!
-Thank you.
It's called
-Arcadia must be blooming.
-The hermitage thing, is it true?
The Joy of Life...
Play! The Joy of Life!
Fragments of a heart,
ashes in the wind,
the diminished piece of,
an old emotion.
Things that are not,
final dry leaves
falling in slow spirals,
soap bubbles.
And you don't even feel sorry...
-Look at them over there.
-...only the sorrow of not feeling pain.
-Who?
-That couple over there.
And, however,
Arcadia must be blooming,
Arcadia must be blooming,
beyond the bronze gates of time...
-How are you?
-Fine.
-Everything ok?
-Yes, great.
-What did you think?
-Great! You were great!
-You didn't like it?
-It was a little tacky.
-No way! It was great!
-I need a drink, but something strong!
Pardon me, excuse me.
Excuse me, please?
-Dad...
-Yes.
Daniela, please, that bottle of Oporto
that's mine, that I have reserved...
Please, that Oporto that's so good.
Dad, I have come with Olmo,
I don't know if you remember him.
-Hi. Nice to meet you.
-Olmo. Nice to meet you, a pleasure.
Congratulations
I really enjoyed the gig.
-Truly congratulations.
-Thanks.
I'm not sure if you remember him,
from high school.
Olmo!
-It's been a long time.
-It has.
Olmo! "Novecento"?
That's me.
What names we used to give back then!
I wanted to call Manuela, Barbara
and her mother insisted on Manuela only
because she was born on the 18th of June.
-The 28th, dad.
-Right, the 28th...
Barbara!
Like the French singer,
my favourite singer.
Barbara, amazing.
I don't know if you like her.
-Yes.
-Would you like an Oporto?
-I'm going to have one.
-No thanks.
-You don't want one?
-No.
I'll have one.
The same bottle please, and in a
wine glass please, never in a tumbler.
I need some air,
I only want the air
that you breathe
and from far away you send me...
This message arrived,
arrived a little late
to see the sun
that is not seen anymore.
Send me a little of your Buenos Aires.
Show me a little of your Buenos Aires.
Tell me a little of your Buenos Aires.
Bring me a little...
air.
What day do you leave?
On the 9th.
After the three wise kings.
But are you ok there?
Yes, I can't complain.
And if I came to Madrid,
I don't really know what I would do.
I don't want to live at my mother's.
I think if I went anywhere,
I would go to Japan.
A totally different culture, a language
that you don't understand at all.
Because you haven't been abroad much,
have you?
No, not really.
Look at that red balloon in the storm,
so pretty.
It's like a sunrise, right?
-What's wrong?
-Nothing...
It's just that I have been thinking
this whole time that...
-What?
-Since you gave me the letter...
it's just, sorry...
I didn't know how to react.
I felt stunned, I didn't know...
I felt like...
I recognized what I read but no...
Don't worry about not remembering.
I don't really remember anything either.
But these days in my mother's house,
going through stuff,
I found loads of our things.
And there are more,
but I found this letter in particular
really funny.
Let's see, give it to me.
-Do you need to reread it?
-Yes, give it to me.
Look: "But we know something that
older people aren't able to know,
not even us when we are older".
-This is great.
-It is.
Yes, yes.
I wish I knew what I meant...
That's just what you meant
that then we were more...
"We could imagine this future
when we are 30", 30 for instance.
"twice our age now,
we will be different,
-as we'll have been through many things".
-If you read it like that,
with that indifference,
with that shitty tone,
-naturally it won't have any charm.
-What tone?
-That's the tone in which I wrote.
-No, that is not the tone!
No, no, no, forget it.
-You wrote it from another place.
-I don't know.
-Read it properly.
-"We could...".
Ok, you read it, let's see...
you know what the tone is, so let's see.
Ok: "The important thing...".
"The important thing
-is to believe in us now..."
-Come on man!
"...because that will
give us strength in the future".
-This seems made up.
-"I think what you see as dark
is life that hasn't happened yet,
like a tunnel..."
"like a tunnel you have to cross but
once across, light will surely return".
-Here you lost it.
-Don't laugh, this is good.
"It's a little scary".
-That metaphor is fine.
-It's a clichéd metaphor.
-I like that part, give it to me,
-No, no, no, it's mine.
-And this is better. No way man.
-No, no.
"...almost two months ago...."
"I don't think we met too early.
I think we met at the best moment
in our lives".
Man, I think you should take that letter
and destroy it so there is no proof.
The strange thing is that you kept it.
Didn't you keep my letters or what?
Well, yes.
I would have to find them.
-You don't know where they are?
-Yes, I would have to find them.
How can you be so faint-hearted
and such an ass?
You know what we should do?
You should go to your house now
and copy out all the letters
from our time together
and you should give them to me tomorrow.
I'm sure they are the only fucking letters
that are worth anything,
as clearly one of us is lame and a dick.
I think that's the perfect excuse
to see each other again,
but let's go and drink something, ok?
-No.
-The night is young.
No, man, I don't want to
drink anything with you.
Yes, come on, let's go to a bar.
-Hi.
-Hi. What would you want to drink?
-Do you have Fernet here?
-Do you have Fernet?
-Yes.
-Yes.
-One.
-Two.
-With Coca Cola?
-Yes.
Sure?
Do you really think that best moment
of your life has already happened?
I don't know.
Yes, it's possible.
12 euros, guys.
-No. I'll pay.
-You'll pay? Thanks!
Thank you.
Half an hour!
I have never told you this,
but when we broke up for good
and you went out with Carlos
I was in such a bad way
-that my mother took me to the doctor.
-No...
They didn't know what to do with me
because I was really depressed
and my mother didn't understand me,
because I didn't tell her anything.
And I remember the doctor.
I was in his office alone
with him and suddenly
he asked me: "What's wrong?".
And I told him: "I am depressed".
And it was the first time I had told
the truth about what was going on.
I told him I was depressed
because I was in love
and it was unrequited
and that was why I was sad.
But it was you who told me
to go out with him.
You were ahead of me,
don't you remember?
I couldn't fight against that.
I didn't cause anything
perhaps I just sped it up.
The only thing you didn't do was to
marry us and be the priest. Fuck off!
Do you see what you are like?
I think that in part I am
who I am thanks to you.
-What?
-In part I am who I am thanks to you.
Or because of you...
In fact I thought I could change
you much more than what I really did.
I wanted to change you that much
but I only changed you this much.
Really?
I followed you and did what I could
but you were, as always,
ahead of everything.
The music you listened to,
your clothes...
The strange thing is
that someone like you would choose me.
You had to be avant-garde in that too.
But what are you saying?
I had no idea about anything.
I knew two things
that I tried to apply as best I could.
But I was really
self-conscious back then.
Excuse me, let me remind you that I was
so timid that when I started school
the teachers called my mother at home.
And said:
"Sorry, but your son can't stay here.
He needs to go
to a special education centre".
They thought I couldn't speak.
I never opened my mouth.
I don't believe you.
-Oh my goodness!
-Oh my goodness!
What are you doing here?
Hey! Cris says we should go somewhere
else. This place is closing now.
Cris is great and it's been ages
since I've seen her.
We are going to a place where
they are going to dance
and if we don't go with them,
they won't let us in.
I don't dance.
I don't like it.
Ok, man, it doesn't matter,
I don't either.
Where would we go?
Why don't you and I
have a drink in another place?
Or buy some beers and drink them
over there in the square?
Yeah, but it's cold...
No, man.
We are going to dance, you will like it.
-Have a little faith.
-Shall we go?
Yes, I am trying to convince him.
-Don't be a dick!
-I don't know how to dance.
-Don't worry.
-Me neither, I have no idea.
-I will teach you.
-He is a teacher and he will teach us.
-Adrian.
-Adrian, that's right.
It's just that I have my motorbike
a bit far away to go and get later...
-I think I'm going to go.
-It's close by.
-A couple of blocks.
-Lets go, ok?
-Yes. Come on, let's go.
-Shall we go?
-Come on.
-Come on, come!
Come on, come on.
You are going to love it, you'll see.
It's really cool!
I don't know how to dance.
I loved it.
You, totally went nuts.
It was amazing.
I didn't expect it.
Fragments of a heart,
ashes in the wind,
the diminished piece of,
an old emotion.
Things that are not,
final dry leaves
falling in slow spirals,
soap bubbles.
And you don't even feel sorry,
only the sorrow of not feeling pain.
And, however,
Arcadia must be blooming,
Arcadia must be blooming,
beyond the bronze gates of time,
Arcadia must be blooming.
But where?
Ashes in the sea
the foam of the water.
Forms of oblivion
that chance forges.
The uncaring passing
of time over things.
Blurry words
that made you cry.
And you don't even feel sorry,
only the sorrow of not feeling pain.
And however,
Arcadia must be blooming,
Arcadia must be blooming,
beyond the bronze
gates of time, my love,
Arcadia must be
blooming.
But, where
is the cherry tree in its splendour?
Where is the golden shepherd?
Where are the red fruits of summer?
Where is your laugh, my love?
Where is the tiger
sleeping next to its prey?
Where is the returning blackbird?
Where is the fountain
of your beautiful hours?
Where are the words you recall?
Where is the bride
who in the green meadow
turns with her eyes still covered?
Where is the rose?
Where is the hawthorn?
Where is the sweetness
of the fountains of flax?
Where is the free will
of all the creatures?
Where is naked innocence.
Arcadia must be blooming,
Arcadia must be blooming.
Beyond the bronze
gates of time, my love,
Arcadia must be
blooming.
But, where?
Where, my love?
You stink.
Go have a shower, ok?
-Good morning.
-Good morning.
You're not going to tell me anything?
How was last night?
Good, good...
A bit... a bit crazy.
But good.
When you texted me that you
were going to her father's gig,
-I thought it was quite surreal.
-It was really surreal.
The people that were at the concert...
It was good to see him.
Remember the book I have
of Leonard Cohen lyrics
translated into Spanish?
He gave it to me.
I found it funny
that they translated
"Givin' me head on the unmade bed"
as "Givin' me heads on the unmade bed".
Later there was
a more careful version,
which was translated well.
"Givin' me a blowjob on the unmade bed".
I think that was my first
instinct as a translator.
A blowjob... Not bad.
So, did you hook up?
No.
No.
But I danced.
-You danced?
-I danced.
With a lawyer.
-With a lawyer?
-A friendly lawyer who told me
that mornings she goes to court
and afternoons she teaches swing-dance.
-Did you dance swing at her father's gig?
-No.
We went to another place where
you have to enter by a small tunnel.
You have to make a phone call to get in.
It was a place with people dancing
and at one point everyone was
clapping and we formed a circle.
People went and danced in the centre.
And I went into the centre.
Actually it was in self defence.
I had no other choice...
I was there in the centre
and I felt a sensation of...
They applauded me!
They applauded me a lot!
Oh my goodness!
And how was it with Manuela?
Good, I don't know.
In fact,
just after we saw each other she gave me
a letter I wrote to her when I was 15.
I didn't remember that letter at all.
What did you write in the letter?
Imagine the things we wrote
when we were 15 years old...
Silly things!
Ok, but if she gave it to you
it must have been important.
No, not really.
I think she gave it to me to
see how I would react.
To provoke me.
First love is always important.
I remember my first boyfriend...
well, "boyfriend".
I had been in love with him since I was
11 and he never paid me any attention.
I'd had a crush on him for years.
We weren't together for very long.
I had idealized him.
And the last time I saw him
we would have been about 19.
And I remember
that I looked at him and thought:
"How can someone change so much
in such a short time ".
I thought he was awful. It was
as though he wasn't the same person.
I don't know.
I looked at him and now nothing...
Now nothing.
Well, from my point of view
she is the same.
Lots of things have happened
after all this time,
but she seems the same to me.
Is she staying a few days
and then going back to Buenos Aires?
She leaves on the 9th.
On the 9th she goes.
Are you going to see her again?
No.
I don't think so.
Ok, shall we go to the exhibition?
-What are you saying, you are exhausted.
-No, I want to go.
Go and get some sleep.
We will see later.
No, no I don't want to sleep.
I want to go with you to the exhibition.
I feel like it.
-Are you sure?
-Of course, we had planned it.
Ok.
-I will have a shower and we'll go.
-Ok.
Are you ready?
-Let's go.
-No. No we're not going.
Sorry.
-I will stay here...
-Go to bed.
-No, I'll stay here.
-Come on!
Do I have to take your shoes off?
What did you do last night?
Nothing.
I had a coffee with Andrea
and I came home.
I was reading The Magic Mountain.
The Magic Mountain.
Yes.
I think I told you.
I have this...
...patient who is obsessed with it.
He reads it and reads it and reads it.
It's the only thing he talks about.
I don't know.
I was curious.
It's interesting
how someone supposedly healthy
can be obsessed
with wanting to be sick,
to be looked after,
to evade the world...
That's good because there
are guys that are extremely jealous.
I am the opposite.
I am never jealous about anything.
Can you give me a drag?
After that he goes and jumps
from a bell-tower.
And then he decides to get hit by car.
-We’ll all meet up there.
-Ok.
And now finally sick of it he says
to the girl: "I think I'm God".
-Who?
-I don't know...
-Hi.
-Let's go to the lake, then you all come?
-Yeah, let's go.
-Ok?
Bye.
-Hi.
-Hi.
-How are you?
-Fine.
Ok, shall we go?
Why didn't you want to go
on the "Top Spin"?
Were you scared?
-Oh my goodness!
-Give him a kiss...
A friend of mine told me that a cousin
of hers worked there last summer
and that she got extra money collecting
the coins on the ground and the grass.
I don't know, I prefer
the ground attractions.
"The tunnel of terror" for example.
I can't stand "The tunnel".
That ride really scares me.
It's not the height,
it's the ideas I have in my head.
I like it.
I mean, I feel
like I have more control.
I go with my feet touching the ground.
Doesn't annoy you that those dicks
push you and shout in your ears?
Perhaps...
But actors that work there are funny,
they do their job well.
You are also quite funny, did you know?
You are boring but funny.
At high school whenever I look at you,
you seem a little absent.
Like in a mysterious way.
To me you only seem happy
when you are playing basketball.
That's cool. You play well.
But I don't know. I always wonder
why you don't talk to people more.
I understand that you are shy, I am shy
too although you don't believe me.
But that is the very reason
I talk nonstop.
This is my theory:
Shy people talk nonstop because
we are afraid of silence.
So if my theory is correct,
you are not strictly a shy person.
You are something else.
That's why you intrigue me.
I actually think you are
quite sure of yourself.
Although you hide it.
-Also you don't have siblings, right?
-No.
You are an only child.
Like me.
They say only children are
a bit more capricious and spoilt.
But that's not always the case.
My mum doesn't care what I do.
I get her attention when I've done
something wrong. She tells me off.
She is the same with my dad.
But my father is a disaster in general.
He's great but he's a disaster.
Sometimes I think it would be better
if they split up.
I don't know why they don't.
I think it's because of me.
Sometimes I feel like saying:
"Hey don't stay together for my sake".
-How do your parents get on?
-They are separated.
-How cool! And how is that?
-Well, I hardly ever see my father.
Right.
Shall we go?
Carlos says we look good together.
You and I?
Yes, you and I.
He told you too?
-Yes.
-Yes?
Yes, more or less.
-More or less?
-More or less.
It's been a cool day.
Yes.
I like talking to you.
And being here with you.
I like it too.
"I am writing to you during the break
because I don't feel like hanging out
and I have to hide it.
I prefer to be here
thinking about us.
I want to tell you
about a book I am reading.
It's one that my mother recommended
telling me that it's not really
appropriate for my age,
that I will have to wait awhile.
Sometimes I think she does it
on purpose, to annoy me,
because as soon as she says that
I want to start reading it at that moment.
It's called A Suspension of Mercy,
the author is Patricia Highsmith.
My mother has a lot
of her books at home,
but this one attracted me
because of the title.
The main character is called Sydney
and he lives in a house
with his girlfriend, Alicia.
It's a detached house,
in a village in England.
At the beginning
they are happy in the house
but they don't have a lot of money
and they live on very little.
Alicia is a painter
but her paintings don't sell.
And Sydney can't manage
to finish his novel
and can't sell the scripts he writes.
And at one point,
Alicia decides to leave for a while.
It's assumed she will go back to her
parents' house till things calm down,
but later it's not so clear.
What happens is that Alicia disappears,
nobody really knows where she has gone.
Not even Sydney.
Then one night the unsettling idea
of taking a rug from the house
and burying it in a forest nearby
occurs to him.
It's quite strange because
while he is carrying the heavy rug,
Sydney starts to imagine
that rolled up in the rug
is Alicia's body.
Although I don't know
if you like this type of story".
"The verse of one
of my father's songs says:
Will they be able to repeat
the words that lovers say
and speak them as if
they had never been said before?
These words encompass the world
and the sky belongs
to whoever speaks them.
That's why they cost you your life.
That's why they cost you your life.
We are always beginners.
We are always beginners
and love is never-ending.
Hardships.
This is what it gives us.
Because nobody knows anything
about their own love".
And now, when they are defeated,
sitting face to face,
which of the two will dare to break
the silence that envelops them?
She delves her gaze to the floor
and he in her eyes, soul inside,
with the hope of reunion,
with the hope of reunion.
Lo and behold the prisoners
of the eternal ceremony.
How incomprehensible their laws seem,
how faded it remains in memory
In fact once I too bore that fire,
and I visited those same quarters
where I loved and sometimes was loved.
Where I loved and sometimes was loved.
We are always
beginners.
We are always beginners
and love is never-ending.
Hardships.
This is what it gives us.
Because nobody knows anything
about their own love.
-Yes?
-Didn't go out?
-No, we are here.
-I have to go. Your father is coming soon.
Ok, bye.
But... don't they mind that we are alone?
If you are 15
and you want to escape
that is enough and more to do it.
You could go before
these city lights
turn off forever.
You can change your name
for another that sounds better.
Finish with your lineage
for once and for all.
You will write in your journal
a new code of honour,
but always in verse, never in prose.
Who would stop you?
Who would stop you?
Who would stop you?
Nobody would stop you.
Who would stop you?
Who would stop you?
Who would stop you?
Nobody would stop you.
Nobody would stop you.
Nobody would stop you.
Yes I'm here. Hello.
How are you?
Fine and you?
-What are you doing?
-I just got back.
-Yeah I know, I timed you.
-And what have you been doing?
-Eating spaghetti.
-How is it?
Cold.
I like hearing you eat.
Please, every day is the same.
Ok, I'm coming!
Are you still there?
Yes.
Do you love me?
I love you.
I love you lots.
"You want me to shut up?
Ok, I will shut up.
but I am going to be a pain in the ass
on paper. Ok?"
"I want you to shut up,
to leave me alone,
to stop looking at me,
to stop talking to me,
although I will regret it".
"Shall we split up?
And everything?
Ok. Here ends our marvellous story.
If you are saying this as a joke
take it back now or shut up forever".
"Before that I should tell you
I have given you gonorrhoea.
And typhus.
Excusez-moi.
And if my kisses were weak,
yours were disgusting
and they made me retch.
I never told you but I closed my eyes
to force myself not to vomit on you.
Respond to that!"
"I only wanted to tell you,
I love you.
I want to spend the rest of my life
with you.
Whatever happens.
I want us to be together forever.
I can easily imagine myself at 80,
sitting on a bench, next to you,
spending the afternoon together.
I can't imagine a future without you".
What's wrong?
Nothing.
It seems to me something is wrong.
I don't know what is wrong with me.
But... has something happened?
No, truly.
It's nothing.
Is it something I've said?
Or have I done something to annoy you?
No, no honestly it isn't you.
It's me. I think...
I think...
I don't know. Sorry.
"Forgive me for everything
that happened before in the park.
I didn't want to worry you
or act like that:
so idiotic and capricious.
Actually I wanted to tell you
anything to calm you,
but the words wouldn't come.
Not like other times.
I am sorry if I made you feel bad.
I love you too much.
It's not my intention to do that to you.
It's just that I've been thinking about
something and I don't know how to stop.
It's something I feel inside,
and it's hurting me.
It's something that has to do with us,
with our love story,
with having met in this moment
of our lives,
when we supposedly have
so much ahead of us.
Laura asked me: "Do you really think
that Olmo is the man of your life?".
And I didn't doubt for a second
in answering: "Of course!".
After that I remembered
what you wrote in the notebook,
that you couldn't imagine
a future without me,
and that you could see yourself with me
when you were 80.
I have to say that made a bit
of an impression on me.
Actually, a lot.
I liked reading it,
but at the same time it scared me.
It made me think
about everything that means,
about what it means for you
to have written that,
because I know you don't write
the first thing that pops into your head.
What I want to tell you
is that I am scared of all the things
we could lose from now on.
Because if our plan is to live together
for the rest of our lives,
I think it will be difficult
not to miss out on all those other things.
And I can tell that
lots of things will happen.
Good and bad things.
Things that we can't control
and at times we won't be prepared for.
These things will come and they will
make us stronger, that's all.
It's like the feeling I had
with the story of Alicia and Sydney.
Although you see it another way,
I think Alicia left Sydney
because she had to,
because she needed something else.
At some point we all
need something more,
or simply stop needing something
for a time,
don't you think?
Most probably with the passing of time
we will have the crazy
sensation of returning here.
I think I am saying goodbye
so as not to make your life miserable,
so as not to make my life miserable,
thinking that this could've been
a beautiful love letter.
That was its intention.
Not everything is as dark as I see it,
right?"
"I read your letter
as soon as I arrived home,
just like you asked.
It was strange because in someway
I knew what I would find inside.
Although it seems like a sad letter,
I don't think it is.
Like everything you give me,
it has something of a challenge or bet
because you believe in me and in us.
You ask me if I believe in destiny
and I think I do.
Actually I believe I have never
asked myself that before,
but since you appeared in my life
I can only believe in the luck I have
and I am only worried about losing it.
I think that something similar
happened to you,
and this is what you wanted to tell me
in the letter.
But we know something
older people aren't able to know.
Not even us when we are older.
The important thing
is to believe in us now
because that will give us
strength in the future.
We could imagine this future,
when we are 30, for instance,
twice our age now,
we will be different, as we'll
have been through many things.
Maybe we will have lost our luck,
but we'll always be able to get it back
if we keep something of ourselves now.
I think what you see as dark
is life that hasn't happened yet,
like a tunnel you have to cross.
Once across
light will surely return.
It's a little scary
because you don't know what's inside.
There will be all sorts I am sure,
good things and bad like you said.
You know I like to imagine things.
I DON'T THINK WE HAVE MET
IN THE WRONG MOMENT,
I THINK WE HAVE MET
IN THE BEST MOMENT OF OUR LIVES...
I WILL NEVER FORGET YOU.
SO... I WANT YOU TO KNOW
THAT YOU WILL ALWAYS FIND ME
IN THIS MOMENT.
THE RECONQUEST
If you are 15
and you want to escape,
that is enough and more to do it.
You could go before these city lights
turn off forever.
You can change your name
for another that sounds better,
finish with your lineage
for once and for all.
You will write in your journal
a new code of honour
but always in verse, never in prose.
Who would stop you,
who would stop you,
who would stop you:
nobody would stop you.
Who would stop you,
who would stop you,
who would stop you:
nobody would stop you.
Nobody would stop you.
Nobody would stop you.
You’d take the road
that runs far from the sidewalk,
the one the unrepentant ones take.
You might see in things
things you couldn’t see before
and even awake you’d be asleep.
Seasons will pass
and you will forget to speak,
you will forget your own memory.
Inspired in the brave
with the same dignity,
like he who cuts a rose
you could melt in the ground.
But one never decides.
But one never decides.
But one never decides.
A man never decides.
However:
Who would stop you,
who would stop you,
who would stop you:
nobody would stop you.
Who would stop you,
who would stop you,
who would stop you:
nobody would stop you.
FILMED IN MADRID