The Queen of Ireland (2015) - full transcript

[music playing]

[indistinct chatter]

[crowd chanting]
Panti! Panti! Panti! Panti!

Panti! Panti! Panti! Panti!
Panti! Panti!

-[crowd cheering]
-Thanks very much.

Thank you so much.

[cheers and applause]

[woman]
Panti!

[crowd chanting]
Equal! Equal! Equal! Equal!

[knock on door]

Panti, it's showtime.



[brassy music playing]

Panti, you look
fucking amazing.

I know.

[crowd applauds]

The challenge with Panti is
probably how laid-back she is.

Yeah.

I am very laid-back,
aren't I?

-[laughs] Yes.
-And occasionally I think Philip

would prefer someone
who's more of a diva,

because I think he gets
a sad sort of, I don't know,

submissive kick out of handling
difficult people.

And I'm just not difficult.

[laughs]

Give us your bits.
What's your headlines?



My headlines?

How are youse?

I look amazing.

Let's get into
a bit of a manifesto.

Then let's get
into Pantigate.

Ah. I'm going to tell
a Madonna story.

Then let's get into
the pressures of being Panti.

Then let's get into sex
and the single drag queen.

Then let's get into
giving out about soccer.

My job as a drag queen

is to sort of commentate
from the fringes,

to stand on the outside
looking in, shouting abuse.

I'm a clown, I'm a fool,
I'm a court jester.

And like the court jester
of old,

it is my job to sometimes
say the unsayable.

And if you have a problem
with that, fucking sue me.

Which is weird, because that
actually happened.

[laughs]

So, what I'm trying
to say to you is that

if you have come along here
this evening

and you are
easily offended,

then this is not
your show.

On the other hand,
you are the kind of person

who loves a joke that begins.

"A nun with Alzheimer's forgets
to walk into a lesbian bar,"

then this is definitely
your show, and welcome.

[crowd cheers]

Hey!

Looking good.
You look gorgeous.

How are you? You good?

Good, good.

Hi, Happy Pride.

[laughs]

How are you?

You good?

-How are you?
-I'm good.

You're a big celebrity,
ain't you?

[laughs]

I feel like
I'm beside Madonna.

[air horns blowing]

[crowd cheering]

[Panti]
It's perfectly easy for,

you know, someone
from the gay community

to listen to a drag queen
make a serious point.

But, you know, to somebody
looking in from the outside,

they have trouble with that,

because they just see
a man dressed as a woman.

[Panti]
Happy Pride, gays...

and innocent bystanders.

[Rory]
If you want to separate
the gay relationships

from the straight relationships
by, "You can't have marriage,

you can have something
that's equivalent,"

or even if it were exactly the
same but had a different name,

I would still
be against that.

Happy Pride, city hall.

For soon I intend
to get married!

[Rory]
Other people are labeling

our relationships
from the outside.

You know, or judging it,
or saying the quality of it--

And unless you're in a gay
relationship, fuck off.

You have no idea
what my relationship is like.

[Panti] I think sometimes
when people look at me,

this giant cartoon woman,

they find it hard to imagine
that I came from anywhere.

Of course,
I am from somewhere.

I'm from a small town in
County Mayo called Ballinrobe.

Ballinrobe is your typical
Irish country market town.

It has a couple of streets,
a town hall,

a cattle mart,
and great excitement

when Tesco came to town.

And even though it now
does have a Tesco,

and a traffic light,

it hasn't really changed much
since I was growing up there,

a young boy called Rory
in the 1970s.

[laughter]

[Finn]
Well, I always think of Rory--

He dressed up in a tutu

belonging to one of the girls
who was doing ballet,

but wearing Wellington boots
underneath it,

and he's leaping around
the sitting room in there.

You know,
that kind of thing.

He was a lovely baby.

He won a Bonnie Baby
competition.

In that respect,
he was a very pleasant child.

But I remember
when he was about two,

he hadn't walked.

And I remember bringing in
the doctor.

And he laughed at me,

because Rory was sitting
on the floor,

surrounded by about
18 other children--

our own five or six,

plus the neighbors had seven,
somebody else had--

And he was completely
surrounded.

And he had no need to walk,
because everybody brought him

everything he wanted.

And then when he stood up,
he stood up and walked.

On the very day, he never
tottered or fell or anything.

When he was ready to walk,
he walked.

And he did
just what he wanted.

-[laughs]
-I think he still does.

Exactly, yeah.

He's his own man, really,
isn't he?

[Rory]
I think until I was 11 or 12,

it was pretty idyllic.

We had a nice house
with a big garden,

and we were at the edge
of the town.

There was a river behind.

Lots of kids on our street.

But I guess around the age
of 11 or 12,

I just started to feel
different than the other boys.

I didn't really enjoy
the same things that they did,

or in the same way.

And it made me feel a bit
like a square peg

in a Ballinrobe-shaped hole.

I went to boarding school,

and all the other boys
would be horribly homesick.

Lots of them would be crying
themselves to sleep at night.

I never was homesick
for a minute.

I was self-aware enough
to know

that I needed to be somewhere
that wasn't Ballinrobe.

[reporter]
Ireland is the only
sovereign EEC country

to still retain criminal
sanctions in law

against homosexuality,

with penalties from ten years
to life imprisonment.

David, are homosexuals
sick people?

No, indeed they're not.

We're neither
sick, ill,

pathological, neurotic
or any of these emotive terms

that are occasionally used
by people

who are not well-informed
on the subject,

to conceal their
own prejudices and to
allege that we are ill.

I don't feel ill,
I hope I don't look it,

and they've
now reached a state
in America

of regarding
homophobe people,

people who have
an irrational fear or
dislike of homosexuals,

as those
who are really ill.

[David Norris]
Well, being the first person

to come out in Ireland

was a rather strange
experience.

I mean, in the beginning,

nothing was said
about homosexuality.

The word wasn't mentioned.

There was no such thing
as gay or anything else.

There was a sort of a gay scene
in Dublin.

But nobody
was in a situation

where they could
come out publicly.

So I was the only one.

But it also led
to the Irish Times

describing me
as the Irish homosexual,

which was rather funny,

you know, because there was
a lot more than me.

But they were just invisible.

The law is clearly grossly
unconstitutional.

The constitution of this country
claims to cherish

all the children
of the nation equally,

and I can tell you
from my experience,

it did not cherish me
as I was growing up.

I hope that we will be
rectifying that.

[Tonie Walsh] Being
an out gay man in the '80s

felt like being
a sexual outlaw.

The same law that sent
Oscar Wilde to prison,

the same law
that was responsible

for countless thousands
of lesbians and gay men

leaving the country
throughout the 20th century

to find a life
in more socially liberal

and accepting
environments,

that same law had the effect
of creating

such a level of offensive taboo
around homosexuality.

And that in itself
was enormously oppressive.

[reporter] In the early hours
of September the 10th last

in Fairview Park in Dublin,

Declan Flynn was set upon
by five men,

including a 15-year-old youth.

He was savagely
beaten unconscious

and left mortally wounded,

adding a new sordid
and vicious phrase

to our contemporary
urban language:

queer-bashing.

[Tonie] What made Declan Flynn's
murder so transformative

was the aftermath,
where his five assailants

were let off with suspended
manslaughter sentences.

And, of course, the public
outrage that erupted in protest

at the judge effectively saying
that a gay man's life

had no value.

[Rory] I didn't know what
I wanted to do with my life,

but I did know
I was interested in art.

I mean, I was always
drawing and doodling.

So I thought,
well, I'll go to art college.

And I thought,
I'll find queers there.

I mean, that's where you find
queers, right? Art college.

[Rory, Sr.]
Because he was always so good
at drawing and cartoons,

I kind of felt that
somewhere in there

he'd be obviously something to
do with the arts, or something.

He'd no inclination to be
a veterinary surgeon, anyhow.

[laughs]

[Rory]
Art college is where I met

my first proper gay,
Niall Sweeney.

And I was lucky, I think,

because we've remained
best friends ever since.

I thought that Niall
had the whole gay thing,
like, down, you know.

First of all, he had
an older boyfriend.

His boyfriend managed
a gay nightclub.

Niall was doing
all the graphics and stuff

for this gay nightclub.

Niall was always, like,
totally turned out
with his purple hair

and, you know,
whatever it was.

So Niall and I
became friends in college.

And through Niall,
I ended up going to things

like nightclubs and Andy Warhol
obituary parties, and whatever.

I loved every second of it.

I was having sex
for the first time,

and there was all that,
you know,

great young nervous energy
around all of that stuff.

It wasn't just, you know,
casually underground.

It was properly underground.

These things were hidden,

and you sort of felt like
you had entered this underworld,

this sort of
parallel universe.

And while you're in there,
you know,

dancing to whatever,
the Pointer Sisters,

and then upstairs
or on the pavement,

just feet away,
there's, like, regular,

ordinary folk, going about
their ordinary, everyday world,

having no idea
that beneath their feet

there were
these illegal homosexuals,

you know,
drinking bloody Campari

and then going home
and fellating each other.

You know, it just seemed
so exciting to me.

Half of my life has been trying
to recapture that excitement.

[music playing]

First time I really remember
doing a proper drag performance

is in college.

I spent my last year in college
designing a drag show.

I had been three years
in art college when I realized,

God, I didn't want
to be a graphic designer.

What was I doing there at all?

My last summer,
I went to London,

and I sort of got involved
in going out

and clubbing and drag queens
and all that stuff.

And that just seemed
like so much more fun to me

than being
a graphic designer.

I had no thoughts
about becoming a drag queen.

I mean, it's funny now you see
all these young drag queens,

and they think
that's a career choice.

It never entered my head

that anybody could make
a living out of drag.

I mean, I didn't know
that anybody could.

And if you'd
said to me then

that I was still going
to be dressing up as a woman,

I would've thought
you were nuts.

[dance music playing]

[Panti]
Gray, depressed 1980s Dublin

was a difficult place
to be fabulous,

so I escaped to
the bright lights of Tokyo.

[dance music playing]

What I remember most
are the freaks and the drags,

the nuts, the gays,
the noise,

the smoke in the clubs
where I made my name.

[Rory]
I had never had any intentions

of doing drag in Tokyo.

I mean, it just never really
entered my mind, really.

And one of the first people
I meet and become mates with,

you know,
was also a drag queen.

Very quickly,
we were partners in crime.

[Angelo]
My drag name was Lurleen.

Rory had used
the name Leticia,

both of which
are impossible

for Japanese people
to pronounce.

So we'd be running around
in clubs dressed in drag,

and no one knew what the hell
we were saying

when we said our names.

So we said,
"Well, we need new names."

And then we came up
with the idea

that we should have
sort of a group name.

[Rory]
The group name was CandiPanti.

But immediately they started
calling us Candi and Panti,

like separate names,

So that just stuck.

[camera shutters click]

Let me tell you
about my second husband.

He used to chew gum
all the time.

So one evening we're sitting
down watching TV,

and he's chewing gum,

and he's smacking
and smacking that gum.

And it's driving me crazy.

So eventually I take the shotgun
off the wall,

and I fire
two warning shots...

into his head.

[dance music playing]

[Angelo]
Literally,

when we went on stage

to the strains
of some ABBA number,

they rushed the stage
and screamed.

It was
like a Beatles concert.

It was really like the Beatles
at Shea Stadium.

It was hilarious.

You couldn't hear the songs
to lip-sync

for the screaming
of the crowd.

And then afterwards,
there were all these cute

19-ish-year-old boys

lined up to kiss us
for photos.

That was sort of a typical night
out in Japan for us.

So we meet again.

[man]
Yes.

Darling, did you
enjoy the show?

[man]
Oh, it was wonderful.

[Rory]
I learned loads from Angelo

about how to pull off
a drag look.

[Angelo]
What I was really doing

was channeling
my own influences

from the drag that I'd come up
with in Atlanta.

The Lady Bunny and RuPaul,

which was really taking
a very old-school,

kind of traditional
glamour-puss drag

and sort of twisting it a bit
and making it fun and fresh

and ironic.

And that was certainly
something Rory took to

like a fish to water,
I would say.

[Rory]
I always think of my life

as these, like, two parts:

before that experience
and after that experience.

That's when the Rory
I am now started.

[camera shutter clicks]

[Niall]
Rory is, as his mother said,

an exotic bird
that landed on the town one day.

[photographer]
Yeah, there.

And Tippi Hedren.
Tippi Hedren.

Very good.

[Niall] I guess
my understanding of Panti

is definitely
like something

from old-school cinema.

A glamorous aunt is always
a good description somehow,

mixed with a bit
of Jessica Rabbit, I guess.

[laughs]

[camera shutter clicks]

you know, you created Panti
visually as much as I did.

Even people who see
Panti regularly,

when they close their eyes
and think of Panti,

what they think of
is the perfect one
that Niall created,

rather than the flesh-and-blood
sweating one

that they might see
at a show.

[Panti]
When I came back to Dublin
in the mid-'90s,

I found a city bursting
with energy and possibilities.

It was creative and fun.

Homosexuality had
only just been decriminalized,

and the gays,
full of a newfound confidence,

were at the forefront of all
of this explosive energy.

And Niall and I became
kind of ringleaders.

We started nightclubs
without a thought

as to whether they were
commercially viable or not.

But we weren't interested
in consumers.

We were interested
in participants.

This was nightclubbing
as performance art.

[dance music playing]

I would never have thought,
"Oh, let's do a fetish club,

-with rubber and"--
-[Niall laughs]

That's not where I was
at the time.

But Niall, you know,
was a more experienced
homosexual, you know,

and so I think at the time,
this was his--

"Yeah, we'll do it."
And I was like, "Okay, then."

[Niall] We
thought,
"Well, we could insert
15 foot of pearls

up Panti's ass.

And I remember
the first time--

Going to Flamingo's Display,
trying to find--

"Would you have, like...?"

You know, and then checking
that they wouldn't come apart.

That was-- I remember
that, actually, being,

"What
if the thread snaps,

and I just
pull a thread out?"

And you're like
a Pez dispenser?

[Panti] We're a traditional
couple in many ways,

but in many ways
a more modern couple,

And so we decided
not just to exchange rings,

we decided
to exchange pearls.

[host]
Exchanged pearls, eh?

Exactly, so Mr. Sphincter
gave me the pearls

before the ceremony,
and I secreted them away

within my person,
and he pulled them from me.

[host] In full view of
the entire congregation?

[Panti]
Yes, that's right, Gerry.

[host]
Hmm. Right, well,

one has to admit,

it's a little different,
isn't it?

[electronic music playing]

[Rory]
The idea of Pantibar was that
it would have elements

of a throwback to an
old-school community gay bar.

Because I'm old enough
to remember,

pre-decriminalization
and all that,

when every gay bar
had frosted windows

or windows with blinds
and, you know,

a door down the side
to get into.

What I liked about Pantibar,
it's on a corner,

it has huge giant plate-glass
windows, it's on full view.

It's a statement in the street,

and that's what a gay bar
should be now.

[woman's voice]
I don't think I can help you.

[lip-syncing dialogue]
You can't help me?

I'm the one
that's helping you.

You want me
to wash my hands
of the whole thing?

Call the sheriff?
Is that what you want?

Well, all right, then.

[sound of engine starting]

[Chris]
There's nothing like
working with somebody

who's thinking faster
than anyone else in the room

to learn how
to do something well.

Because, you know,
when you're on stage

with somebody like that,
you have to--

You have to keep up.

[lip-syncing dialogue]
You'll do as I tell you.

And if I tell you to lie,
you'll do that, too.

I'm never going to suffer
for you again.

Not ever.

Do you understand?

[Rory] Women are still seen
as the weaker sex and all that,

and in some ways,
a woman dressing as a man,

people somehow see that
the woman has,

in a weird way,
sort of empowered herself,

you know, by taking
on this masculine form.

But, you know,
a man dressed as a woman

is seen to have sort of
weakened or demeaned himself.

[dance music playing]

[Mark]
You know, when you're a gay boy

growing up
in the countryside,

it was being called out
as effeminate

that was frightening,

because we were always told
that effeminacy was weakness.

I actually saw great drag queens
and I saw Panti perform.

And, you know, I was--
I don't know what age I was.

But you see that what they do
is they take all the fears

of effeminacy you have,

and they turn it back on you

in a performative sense
as strength.

And you go,

"Yes!"

Yes, that is correct.

Effeminacy is not weakness,
it's actually strength.

And it's the thing inside you
that you have got to celebrate.

And so sissy power.

[laughs]

[applause]

[Panti laughs]

Wow!

Calm down.

In many ways,
I would argue,

that the drag queen
is the ultimate expression

of the theatrical arts.

She is the director,
the scriptwriter,

the makeup artist,
the costume designer,

the producer, and the actress
in the leading role

of the production
of her own life.

You know, when an actor
steps off the stage,

well, he's just a waiter.

But a drag queen
is never off the stage.

She carries the stage
with her,

and it amplifies her
every gesture.

I had worked as an actor
for many years,

and I just started to write
and direct for theater.

And I had made one show.

And I said, you know,

"Panti, will you make a show
with me in the theater?"

And, you know, the abridged
version of what she said

is, "Who the fuck are you?"

But there was something
in that moment

where she thought,
"I'll take a chance."

So in that first show,
we played to 60 people a night

for five shows.

That was 2007.

And then over those years,

I think we made
about four or five shows.

We've toured the shows
to Australia,

we've been to the UK,
America.

[Rory] Philly knows my voice
better than anybody else.

In a way he's like
an objective me.

I'm always worried that,
you know,

he's going to write
the world's greatest musical

or whatever it is,
and he'll be gone for two years,

and I'll just be sitting here
doing nothing.

[laughs]

In 1995, myself and Niall
and our friend Trish Brennan

were approached
by the Dublin AIDS Alliance

and asked if we would produce
the Alternative Miss Ireland

as a fundraiser
for HIV charities.

And we did, and we've been
doing it ever since.

Yes.

Well, these are
detachable cuffs and collars,

which I'm going to make
a decision on

when I'm
all painted up and all.

And this is
for practical purposes.

[laughs]

I'll get to wear it
afterwards,

because that actually
comes with...

you know, a huge,
flowing skirt...

for evening wear.

But sometimes for
Alternative Miss Ireland,

I get these huge, big gowns, and
I never get to wear them again,

because when do I ever
get to wear these things?

Maybe at Pride or something.

This stupid gag
makes me laugh every time.

"Falsies, for that
glamour look."

[laughs]

So stupid.

It's the last one this year,
for no big drama.

But 80 years is a long time
to do anything, isn't it?

We laugh and say that,
"Oh, she's all grown up.

She's a woman now."

Something feels right
about finishing now.

It's good to finish isn't it,
when it's still really strong

and everybody's loving it
and everything.

I have the running order
that you're all
coming out in.

First person out
is going to be
Miss Madonna Lucia.

[cheers and applause]

Two is Alexandra Bhurka.

Three, Big Chief
Random Willy-girl.

[crowd laughs]

Four, Mr. Donkey...

Hi, how are you?

[indistinct chatter]

[Rory] We jokingly call it
gay Christmas,

but it does feel like that.

Lots of our gay family,
you know,

comes to Dublin
for it every year.

My biological family
gathers at Christmas,

but my logical family
gathers for gay Christmas.

There's going to be
a lot of that tonight.

[cheers]

Hi!

How y'all doing?

[audience]
Whoo!

Good evening, hello,
and welcome to this evening

of glamour
rooted in despair.

Willkommen to the HIV
of beauty pageants.

The older gays
got it years ago.

The drug addicts aren't really
sure how they got it,

but they're pretty sure
they had a good time.

The younger gays only stumbled
across it recently

when they should've
known better.

And the hemophiliacs are up
on the balcony thinking,

"What the fuck
are we doing here?"

[laughter]

But the thing that I am going
to miss most

is every year working
with this really incredible

bunch of people.

And so, I really want to say,
on my behalf,

and on behalf of the whole
Alternative Miss Ireland family,

to the rest of the
Alternative Miss Ireland family,

thanks a fucking million.

It's been an honor
and a privilege.

[cheering and applause]

Fuck.

I can't believe I haven't
had a feeling in about 15 years,

and now I'm having one
in fucking public.

And so the time has come
to raise the roof

and raise the curtain
on this,

the heel-clicking,
snake-banishing,

roller-coaster,
donkey-ride known as

the Alternative Miss Ireland
2012!

[techno music plays]

[Rory] The Alternative Miss
Ireland has very much reflected

the growth of Ireland's
gay community.

It started just after
decriminalization,

and as the gay community
and gay scene here grew,

it became more confident and
more aboveground, so to speak.

It's sort of a mirror of
the gay community in some ways.

And I think it's a mirror
of all the good things

about the gay community.

It's actually something
I'm really proud

to have been involved in.

When I got my HIV diagnosis,

it probably seems stupid,
but it was a total shock.

I was not expecting it.

I was acutely aware
of what it all meant,

because I'd been
to AIDS funerals, I knew people.

I, you know, I was of the age
where it was everywhere.

And I do remember going outside,
you know,

and it was
just a gorgeous, lovely day.

And everyone's
wandering around,

and they're going to the shops,
whatever it is they're doing,

like ordinary things.

And I was really...

I was fucking furious,
is what I was.

I was furious that everyone
was just like,

"It's an ordinary day."

And it fucking wasn't
an ordinary day.

[Niall]
I was actually with Rory

when he found out
he was HIV-positive.

I mean, it feels now like it
was just this other world,

because at that time,
that was the end.

There was no point
talking about it.

In some way, you just had
to get on with that.

And I think that's kind of
a Rory trait.

I mean, he will actually
now say, you know, well,

"I made my AIDS-y bed,
and now I have to lie in it."

[cheering]

[Panti]
Good night! Thank you so much!

Being positive for HIV
was worrying, you know.

But I had always faith
that something would turn up.

And I have great faith.

And I just--

We've a Sacred Heart picture
down there that somebody gave us

after we came into the house,

and it's down on the wall
opposite, beside the bed.

And I just said,
"I place all my trust in you.

It's over to you."

And thanks be to God, he's...

Oh, thank God that's over.

[laughs]

[camera shutter clicks]

We'd be nothing
without you.

[both laugh]

[Niall]
Rory's got two things going on.

He's got both the dressing up
as a cartoon, pixilated lady,

and the HIV at the same time.

So, what do you say
on that first date?

You know?

[Rory]
If you say, "Hey, how about
we go on a date next Friday.

Oh, and by the way,
I'm HIV-positive."

The chances are

you won't be going out
on a date next Friday.

It is literally
the only thing, really,

that bothers me about it,

is that horrible thing
about telling somebody.

And, yeah, it's been
a nightmare for my love life.

[laughs]

Yeah, when do you tell them?

And then how are they
going to react?

It's like a constant coming out,
that's what it is.

You're coming out to people.

It has that same feeling of...

you have to tell them
this big thing.

And, of course, there's a bit
of that about the drag, too.

You know, if I meet a guy
who doesn't know,

you know, who I am,
what I do for a living,

sometimes there's just
that feeling about that--

"Oh, God, I have to tell him
I'm a drag queen."

There's a bit of that
with the drag,

but, obviously, the HIV thing
is so much bigger.

And it's just that you have
that sort of that feeling

that you had long ago
about coming out to somebody.

[Declan]
I don't think that there's
any gay person in Ireland

who hasn't experienced
homophobia

in its most vague form.

It's there all the time,
you know.

The fact that we can't even
avail of equal marriage

is homophobic
in its very essence,

because what it's saying is

gay people and straight people
are different.

There are other shades of it.

There is violence.

I have been with Rory,
walking down a street,

when I've been
punched in the face.

I don't speak about it
often because, to me,

I wasn't surprised.

I was surprised
by the event.

I wasn't surprised
I live in a society

where that happens
to gay people,

because I've seen it before,
and before, and before.

The idea of public intimacy
has been robbed

from every homosexual,
I think.

And what it comes down to
in the end

is that you suddenly
might make a decision, yes,

I'm going to hold
my boyfriend's hand in public,

but I'm not doing it because
of the intimacy of the moment.

I'm doing it because I feel like
I'm going to not be afraid.

And it becomes
a statement.

And actually it becomes
the antithesis

of what you wanted it to be
in the first place.

So that is homophobia.

[man]
Tonight, we are delighted

to welcome to the stage

Ireland's most fabulous
drag queen,

and famous activist, Panti.

[applause]

Have any of you ever
been standing

at a pedestrian crossing

when a car goes by,
and in it are a bunch of lads.

And they lean out the window
as they go by and shout,

"Fag!"

And throw a milk carton at you.

Now, it doesn't
really hurt.

I mean, after all,
it's just a wet carton,

and in many ways,
they're right.

I am a fag.

So it doesn't hurt.

But it feels oppressive.

And when it really does hurt,
is afterwards.

Because it's afterwards
that then I wonder and worry

and obsess over
what was it about me?

I mean, what did they
see in me?

What was it
that gave me away?

And I hate myself
for wondering that.

It feels oppressive.

And the next time
that I am standing

at a pedestrian crossing,

I hate myself for it,

but I check myself to see
what is it about me

that gives the gay away.

And I check myself to make sure
that I'm not doing it this time.

[cheers and applause]

[big band music plays]

Every single person
in this audience

has a cousin
or a neighbor or the guy
that you work with

who's a flaming queen.

I mean, you all know one.

And it's very hard to hold
prejudices against people

when you actually
know those people.

And Ireland, because
it's such, you know,

small communities
grouped together,

everybody knows
the local gay.

And, you know,
maybe 20 years ago,
it was okay to,

you know, be really mean
about him.

But nowadays it's
just not okay to be
really mean about him.

If you are going
to argue that gay people
need to be treated

in any way differently
than everybody else,

or should be
in any way less,

or their relationships
are in any way less,

then I'm sorry.

After what I thought was
a pretty innocuous appearance

on a television show,

all sorts of shit
has hit the fan.

I am being threatened
with legal action

by five different people,

and so is RTE.

[news anchor]
RTE's managing director
of television

has said the broadcaster paid
a total of 85,000 euro

in a financial settlement

following a recent edition
of the Saturday Night Show.

[reporter] Following
threats of legal action,

RTE apologized and a financial
settlement was made,

now known to have been
85,000 euro,

to journalist John Waters,

and to members of the
conservative Christian group,

the Iona Institute.

The apology and settlement
became the subject

of heated public debate.

2,000 people took part
in a protest

in Dublin city centre...

[John Lyons]
I thought, you know,
I was living in a society

where this stuff
isn't acceptable anymore.

But yet, when people challenge
people on these issues--

And that's what Rory O'Neill
did on the Saturday Night Show.

He called it what it is.

RTE got it wrong,

and everybody in the public
knows they got it wrong,

and RTE need to come out
and let us know

that they got it wrong.

Otherwise, there will not
be confidence

in our national broadcaster

to mediate any debate
with confidence,

particularly around issues
that effect my life,

and the people who love me,

and love all the other people
who aren't treated properly

in this society.
Thank you.

We must not allow ourselves
to be bullied and silenced,

because this is all it is.

This is bullying.

These are the people
who are always complaining

about being silenced.

When have they ever
been silenced?

-[crowd cheers]
-I don't care

if Panti wears a tutu,

if he wears
a ballet skirt.

He's a fantastically glamorous
human being,

-who also...
-[cheers and applause]

...also happens to be
intellectually brilliant

and morally courageous.

[Rory] It turns out
that all the rest
of the mainstream media

are absolutely terrified
to report on it,

because they are also
terrified

of these stupid
solicitor's letters.

I mean, it turns out
that you can cower

the whole media industry
in this country

by a simple
solicitor's letter.

[Panti]
And for the last three weeks,

I have been lectured
by heterosexual people

about what homophobia is

and about who is allowed
to identify it.

Straight people have lined up--

ministers, senators,
barristers, journalists.

--have lined up to tell me
what homophobia is

and to tell me what I am allowed
to feel oppressed by.

People who have never
experienced homophobia

in their lives,

people who have never
checked themselves

at a pedestrian crossing,

have told me that unless
I am being thrown into prison

or herded onto a cattle truck,
then it is not homophobia.

And that feels
oppressive.

I do, it is true,
believe that almost all of you

are probably homophobes.

But I'm a homophobe.

I mean, it would be incredible
if we weren't.

I mean, to grow up
in a society

that is overwhelmingly
and stiflingly homophobic

and to somehow escape unscathed
would be miraculous.

So I don't hate you
because you're homophobes.

I actually admire you.

I admire you,
because most of you

are only a bit homophobic.

And to be honest,
considering the circumstances,

that is pretty good going.

But I do sometimes
hate myself.

I hate myself,
because I fucking check myself

when standing
at pedestrian crossings.

And sometimes I hate you
for doing that to me.

But not right now.

Right now,
I like you all very much

for giving me a few moments
of your time.

And for that,
I thank you.

[cheers and applause]

What the fuck just happened?

I mean, what the fuck
just happened?

How did this happen?

It's nuts.

Nuts. Nuts.

The story was
becoming bigger

and gathering its own steam
anyway,

but I think from my personal
point of view,

the speech just changed
absolutely everything.

You know, and I don't want
people to get the impression

that being gay means that,
you know,

every day somebody's throwing
stuff at you from a car,

or that you're
constantly unhappy.

It's not that, it's just
that there are these constant

small psychic nicks,

these little psychic cuts.

You know, I wish I could
just not care.

But I can't not care,

because there's this
tiny part of me--

And look at me, I'm dressed
as a giant woman.

And yet,
somehow, even I still harbor

these little
shames about it.

And I don't want to.

We all feel that,
all gay people feel that.

We're constantly forced
to check ourselves,

and not be quite as gay
as we might want to be

in order to feel safe.

[anchor] You're not
a heterophobe, are you?

No. I love heterosexual people.

If there weren't
heterosexual people,

I wouldn't have boys
to fancy.

Okay, Panti Bliss, we'll leave
it there. Thank you very much.

Thank you so much.

Hi.

-How are you?
-I'm good. How are you?

Lovely to see you.
Welcome back.

[Rory]
One of the reasons I insisted

on doing this as Panti
and not as Rory

was just to kind of draw a line
under all of that.

I mean, it was only
a bizarre incident

that caused trouble
the last time.

So it's hardly ever
going to happen again, is it?

[laughs]

He was on his own
the last time,

so we want
to be here for him.

[laughs]
If it all goes belly-up again.

By the power
of big hair.

Is there anything else
you wanted from me?

Last time I was on here,
I was a non-smoker.

And now I'm smoking again.

I have to consider
what I say publicly

much more than I would've
in the past.

And that's actually
a little awkward

when you're a drag queen
entertainer,

because part of what I do
is being able to say things,

and sometimes in
a lighthearted way or whatever.

[cheers and applause]

[big band music plays]

Hi, Panti.

Right.

-Hi, Brendan.
-Hi, Panti.

-Hi, how are you?
-I'm good.

It feels like
it's only been five lawyers

-since I saw you last.
-[laughs]

Yes.

When you and I get together,
it can be a wild,

wild night, Panti, but let's
keep it country tonight.

[indistinct chatter]

But I don't want to start
over-considering

everything I say, or--

You know, because I am
an entertainer,

and I am a drag queen,
and that is part of what I do.

So, yeah, I've had to make
a sort of conscious decision

not to think too hard about that
or to worry too much about that.

If I upset a few people
along the way,

well, that's going
to happen.

Thanks, Brendan.

Thank you, Panti.
Yeah, are you happy
with that?

Yeah, absolutely,
yeah, yeah, all good.

Yeah. Thank you
very much.

Nicely handled,
is what I would say.

[Panti] We're off to the
People of the Year Awards,

which is why I'm dressed
like a Disney villain.

[laughs]

When you even think
of the idea

of the leader of the country
going into a gay bar

for a pint with their LGBT wing
or whatever,

that's a massive change.

Just a couple of years ago,
there's absolutely no way

the leader of this country
would've,

you know, gone into a gay bar
and, you know, hung out with...

And if the new attitude
is that a picture opportunity

in a gay bar
is a way to court votes?

I'm all for it.

Like, people
were complaining,

"He's just looking
for the pink vote."

Thank God he's looking
for the pink vote.

You know? There was a time
when the only vote they wanted

was the bloody Church vote.

Oh, I see
my sisters there.

How are you, lovely?

Good. Hi, hi.

It is, yes.

[indistinct chatter]

Oh, we clean up well.

[laughter]

My fourth daughter.

...gave me away...

[Rory]
I know for my parents
it was upsetting.

Especially
in the early part.

But then I think after
this Noble Call speech

and when it sort of
turned around,

then it became something
totally different,

and I think they became
very proud about it.

They've been
really good to me.

I haven't always brought
easy things to them,

from gayness
to HIV to whatever.

And...

yeah.

It was nice to bring something
nice to them,

even though in the beginning
it wasn't.

But it turned into
something nice for them.

Fuck.

[applause]

For the simple yet beautiful
thing of being herself,

and himself,

this award goes most deservedly
to the wonderful Panti Bliss.

Do come up.

[applause]

Thank you.

Congratulations.

Congratulations. Mwah!

What does this award
mean to you--?

Sorry, can I just say
oh, my God, Stephen Fry!

[cheers and applause]

[Panti]
I would like to remind you

that anybody can get married
in this country.

Except you.

Any asshole
can get married.

Any dumb-fuck soccer hooligan
can get married.

Any gay-basher on George's St.
at 4:00 a.m. can get married.

Any fascist,
any murderer,

any sex offender
can get married.

But you cannot.

[crowd boos]

Because, oh, my God,

let the gays get married,
and the sky will fall down!

You should be angry
about that.

Get angry about that,
be angry about that.

Get your righteous anger
up about that,

because it is
a righteous anger,

and channel that anger
to do something about it.

Get behind the campaign.
Do your bit.

[crowd cheers]

[Una Mullally]
The masses of people
turned around and said,

"We want Panti."

We want Panti to go out
and be an ambassador."

And that was just magical.

I mean, I think apart
from anything else,

what that time did,

apart from start loads
of conversations

with straight people
about homophobia,

was that it gave the gays
a confidence

that all of a sudden they could
talk about these issues

at the dinner table
with their parents,

and all of a sudden, one
of their people, their Panti,

was on the front page
of newspapers

and was a talking head
on international news programs.

You know,
that means a lot.

-[man] What do we want?
-[crowd] Equal rights!

-[man] When do we want it?
-[crowd] Now!

[Rory]
The last step is full access

to equal marriage
and parenting rights.

You know, those are
the last steps,

and they are about
to be tackled now.

We're going to be having
a referendum on gay marriage.

So it's going to be unpleasant,

and this is sort of
the final fight.

-[man] What do we want?
-[crowd] Equal rights!

-[man] When do we want it?
[crowd] Now!

[Una]
May 2015.

Ireland voting
on marriage equality

to basically insert
into our constitution

a line that people can get
married regardless of their sex.

Ireland could
potentially become

the first country
in the world

to pass marriage equality
by a popular vote.

[crowd cheers]

[Tonie]
People have a sense

that we are on the cusp
of significant change

that goes way beyond just simply
giving marriage rights

to gay people.

[man] Bring them all up
again, guys!

[Una]
This could be the domino effect

that the world
has been waiting for

in terms of LGBT rights,

because if Ireland can,
by a popular vote,

bring marriage equality
into law,

then who the hell else
can do it?

[man] It's time
we ended tolerance

for gay, lesbian and bisexual
people in Ireland.

Because tolerance is what we've
had for the last 20 years.

And tolerance is about saying,

"Go and play by yourselves,
but don't bother
the rest of us."

Tolerance is about saying
that, yes,

you can be different,

but don't expect us
to recognize that
you are equal.

And, really, it is time,
in fact, that we in fact ended

that tolerance and replaced it
with something else,

which is citizenship.

[cheering, applause]

[Tonie] Symbolically, it's the
closest the country will give us

to an apology for the hurt
and suffering,

and the alienation
and the marginalization

that forced people,
friends of mine and others,

to live miserable,
shitty lives.

[Rory]
We are two weeks, roughly,

away from the marriage
equality referendum.

It feels like it's been coming
for a long time.

But it is
sort of depressing,

whether it's hanging
on a lamppost on a poster,

or whether it's on your radio
or your TV,

there's just this constant
stream of people

characterizing you
in a particular way.

And when I say "you,"
I mean just all gay people.

[man] You've got no right
to say to anyone else,

you can't do this,
you can't do that.

Oh, well,
thank you very much.

Good, thank you so much.
Thank you.

Every day I hear from somebody,

"Oh, somebody called me a queer
in the street yesterday."

And that wasn't
every day before,

whereas now because it's in the
ether, it's in the atmosphere,

there's this sort of,
you know,

bitterness which I'm finding
wearying and tiring.

And it is bizarre to think

you have to knock
on strangers' doors,

and they come to the door,

and you have to essentially
beg them

to allow you

the same respect and rights
as everybody else.

We are expected to go around
asking people to okay us.

Who else has had
to do that?

And if you had
any questions, or...

You're okay?
Would you like a leaflet?

Thank you so much.
Thank you.

If the referendum doesn't pass,
it'll be crushing,

because the people will have
spoken and they will have said,

"Actually, no.

"That there's a limit
to our acceptance of you.

"There's a limit
to our respect for you.

"And you've reached that limit,

"and, actually,
we're not okay with you,

"and actually...

"yeah, we don't actually think
you're the same as us,

and I don't think you should be
a full and equal citizen."

People are going
to take it that personally.

Because it is that personal.

[news anchor 1]
After a month of campaigning

and 15 hours of voting
yesterday,

the moment has arrived.

Ireland's made history
by putting the issue

of marriage equality
to a public vote...

[news anchor2]
Ballot boxes are being opened

around now as counting of votes
will soon begin...

[news anchor 3]
We'll know in a matter of hours

whether or not
Ireland's made history

to become the first
country in the world

to vote
for marriage equality...

[David]
I agree with Daniel O'Connell,

the Great Liberator.

When some mean-minded people

within
the Protestant Ascendancy

suggested that giving rights
to Roman Catholics

would diminish
their rights,

O'Connell made the point
that human dignity and freedom

are not finite resources,

that the more you parcel them
out, the less you have yourself.

In fact, the more
you parcel them out,

the more enhanced
your liberty and dignity are.

[indistinct chatter]

[man]
It's decades of work
you made possible.

I know,
but I only wish I was 21,
rather than 71.

[both laugh]

[news anchor 1]
Ireland appears on course

to make history
by becoming the first country

to approve same-sex marriage
by popular vote...

[news anchor 2]
But within minutes
of boxes being opened

around the country
at 9:00 this morning,

the tallies told one thing:

Ireland had given equal
marriage a resounding yes.

-Congratulations.
-Thank you.

Congratulations to you
and all your hard work.

It's an amazing day
for all of us.

Everyone's been ready
for so long.

And, like, you caused
the national debate last year

that didn't have to be had
this year because of you.

Oh, that's not really true,
but thank you.

It's totally true.

Oh, hi.

Well done.

Yes!

[laughs]

[man whistles]

[hoots]

Perfect day for...
for a yes.

For a social revolution.

Oh!

Yay!

Thank God I look
fucking amazing.

[both laugh]

[cheering, applause]

[whistling]

Thank you.

Thanks, everyone.
Thank you so much.

[cheering, applause]

[crowd]
Panti! Panti! Panti! Panti!

[Panti] I think the future
for, like, young LGBT people

is incredible now
in this country.

They'll be growing up
in a country which absolutely,

on every level,
treats its LGBT citizens

exactly the same
as everybody else.

They'll be growing up
on a level playing field,

and they've never
had that before.

We've never
had that before.

And this has
actually not been

a three-month or four-month
campaign.

It's been a 40-year campaign,

and is the absolute epitome
of a grassroots campaign.

It started 30,
40 years ago

when a tiny number
of really brave men and women

stood up and said they had
nothing to be ashamed of.

-[crowd cheers]
-And 40 years later,

the country agrees: we have
nothing to be ashamed of.

We're the same
as everybody else.

-What a day.
-Congratulations.

[cheers and applause]

[crowd cheers]

Panti!

Whoo!

[crowd]
Panti! Panti! Panti! Panti!

Panti! Panti!
Panti! Panti!

Oh!

Thank you so much.

Not at all,
thank you so much.

Thank you so-- Look at this.
This is what I like to see.

More makeup
than I'm wearing.

We've waited
39 years for this,
my partner and I.

Congratulations.
Enjoy your married life.

-Is this your partner?
-Yeah.

How long have
you been together?

39 years.

40 years
next year.

40 years?
You look amazing on it.

We saw a few things
in our time.

-Yeah, I'm sure you did.
-Thank you.

You lesbians and your good skin.
It's all the hill-walking.

Hi. Ah, chickens--

Oh!

Look at you,
making the effort today.

Oh, hi, Andrew.

How are you today?

Look at you.
You look fabulous.

[laughs]

Aodhán, oh, my God,
thank you so much.

You played a blinder.

And I met your lovely wife
in Australia, somewhere.

I know, yeah, she told me.
Well done.

-No, thank you.
-Brilliant, okay?

Let's have a picture
with Aodhán.

[laughs]

Get Joan in here.

Joan! Come on over, Joan!

[laughs]

-Hi!
-Hi. Lovely to meet you, Joan.

Get in there.

At last I met someone
taller than me.

How do you feel
about the win?

-The victory?
-What?

How do you feel about the
victory for the Yes campaign?

It feels incredible today.
It couldn't feel any better.

It's thrilling.

Have you
ever felt happier?

I have, yeah, but--
Yeah, a few times.

[all laugh]

Will you be looking
for a husband tonight?

-I found one.
-[laughs]

But it's not the husband
I'm looking for,

it's a lesbian lover.

[all laugh]

Because now
we can go any way,
you know?

It's all in the mix.

-Will you be partying all night?
-Of course I will.

I think this is
one day of the year
where I'm allowed.

What's happening
at Pantibar tonight?

We'll just be having
a fun time and
partying hard.

Look at this. John Lyons.

-Hey, Panti.
-Oh!

What's your message
to the people that voted No?

That I think-- I honestly
believe that in time,

they'll understand
that their fears were,
you know, unfounded,

and that they'll look back
eventually and think,

actually, yes,
today is a good day.

And...yeah.

Do you forgive people
for voting No?

I don't have
to forgive them.

They voted No out
of their own concerns,

out of their own
honestly-held concerns.

But I think
that those concerns
were unfounded,

and I hope that, in time,

they'll come
to agree with me on that.

[crowd cheering]

Can I just say,

before the official result
comes out,

I'd like to say thank you
to everybody for your hard work.

It's been amazing!

-[crowd cheers]
-It's been amazing!

Thank you so much!

Thank you! Mwah!

[crowd]
Panti! Panti! Panti! Panti!

[woman on TV] Votes in favor
of the proposal: 1,201,607.

[cheers]

[woman on TV continues
indistinctly]

Nice job.

[laughs]

Majority of votes
in favor of the proposal:

467,370.

[cheers]

[somber music playing]

[Rory]
The sky didn't fall in.

Everyone's okay.

And that was
an amazing day.

[car horns honk]

If No had won,

there would have been
no dancing in the streets.

There would have been
no outpourings of joy and love

and hugging and tears
and kissing and cheering.

You know, because nothing
would have changed.

It would just have been
exactly the same

as it had been
the day before.

[siren blaring]

Because the No argument
was an intellectual argument.

It wasn't about changing lives
for the better or anything.

It was just
all intellectual arguments

about what kind of society
they wanted to see

reflected in the dry piece
of paper of the constitution.

For us, it was about
our lives.

And that's why we won.

Because people
recognized that.

Lives trump dry, intellectual
arguments every time.

[clock chiming]

You could easily have thought
during the campaign

that this was all just about
changing a law or whatever.

But, actually,
the last few days,

it's four days
after the result or something,

every time I walk
through town,

I've seen gay couples
holding hands

or, you know, canoodling outside
a restaurant

just like everybody else would.

And I wasn't expecting that,

and I don't know how long
it'll last.

But at the moment,
there is this feeling

that it really has
all changed.

And, you know,
gay people now,

certainly in Dublin
at the moment,

feel different.

And they are expressing
that they feel different

by just acting
like everybody else.

My relationship with Ballinrobe
has always been complicated.

You know, that sense
of not quite fitting in

became more pronounced
over the years.

The distance became greater
between me and the town.

[sighs]

Okay, I'm not going to
stand up in the marquee
in Ballinrobe

with Mrs. Feerick
on a plastic chair
in the front row,

and do stories
about tranny-chasers

and the usual stuff.

I'm not.

[Philly] The show should,
essentially, only be
for your mother.

You're arriving in your mother's
living room, essentially,

and doing a show
for all of her friends.

To hit them with a million
AIDS jokes is a bit..

I think, yeah.

Like, I just keep
coming back to...

you know, you're just doing
the show for your mother.

Okay. So my mother
wouldn't want it to be
all AIDS jokes.

[both laugh]

And also "Pressures
of Being Panti"

goes into, like,
anal fissures.

[laughs]

[chuckles]

I'm not telling
that story.

No.

[Philly] I just feel
like it's going to feel
like a big house party.

-Yeah.
-And they're going to want,

you know, the kind
of entertainment that

rural Ireland is used to,

is people going around
to the tables and talking.

I think that, like...

Well, you've got that.
That's part of your thing.

-Yeah.
-So...

[Rory]
No, I'm not doing--

Yes, the show is going
to be massaged

-for a local audience.
-It's for 80-year-olds.

For 80-year-olds.
[laughs]

I'm putting in a joke
about "Cock" Jennings.

[all laugh]

And he's leaving town
immediately afterwards.

I would think everybody
is looking forward

to tonight's performance.

I've met, even,
some this morning,

and they're all wishing us
good luck,

and they'll be down,
and all this kind of stuff.

And the people
in the street especially,

they're very proud
in Abbey Street,

and they're proud of Rory,
I think.

[laughs]

They're looking forward
to this, anyway.

We're all a bit nervous,
and I think he is himself.

Look how old I am.

[Panti] I am sitting
in my parents' old bedroom.

When I was a kid,
this was my parents' room.

And my mother
would get ready here.

And you'd see all the perfume,
and she'd be sitting here,

and I'd be watching her.

And now, I'm sitting at this
dressing table in this bedroom,

dressing up
as a giant cartoon woman.

I am the gayest thing
in the world.

I mean, I am the gayest thing
in the world.

And the whole reason
I felt uncomfortable,

even before I knew
it was the reason,

but it was,
because I was the gay kid.

And now, essentially,
my gayness is being celebrated

in the town that I felt weird
being the gay in.

Like, who could have
imagined that?

That the very thing
that made me feel weird

and uncomfortable

and like there wasn't
a place for me here,

is the very thing
that the whole town

is now about to celebrate
in a fucking marquee

that they've put up
in the car park

of the local tire business.

It's nuts.

Who'd have thought we'd all be
sitting around the kitchen

in Ballinrobe,
County Mayo,

two of us dressed
like giant women?

Yeah, they're not used
to kind of, uh...

queens in Ballinrobe.

[laughter]

Unless you have been
that gay boy in a small town,

I don't think you can understand
what it is.

[somber music playing]

[sighs]

[laughs]

It's kind of "awesome,"
isn't it?

There you are.

[Panti] At least we don't
have far to go.

[all laugh]

[announcer]
And now, please give it up

for your national treasure.

Here's Panti!

[cheering, applause]

[crowd cheers]

Oh, my God.

Oh!

[laughs]

Now, I'm going to be
really honest with you

before we get started.

I'm crapping it.

[laughter]

[Rory]
It's true to say that,

while I breathed life
into Panti,

she breathed more life
into me.

It was not a good week.

It was difficult
and distressing and weird,

and upsetting...like sex
with Michael Flatley.

[laughter]

I cannot believe
I'm saying this stuff

to a crowd from Ballinrobe.

[crowd cheers]

[Rory] She's colored me.

She's made me
a better person.

Sure, she's brought me
some trouble

and a few heartaches
along the way,

but all of that
pales in comparison

to what she's given me.

Friends, opportunities,
courage, adventures, fun.

And, boy, it's been fun.

And anyway, homophobe
is not the worst thing

that you can call someone.

"Cock Jennings" is.

[laughter]

And I'd like to apologize
to Cock.

For the first time in my life,
I'd like to apologize to Cock.

[Rory]
I've entertained in London,
Paris, New York, Melbourne,

and I have horrified in
Limerick, Norwich, and Hobart.

But I'm still here.

Making a show of myself.

Thank you all so much
for coming.

Thank you so much.
Thank you.

[cheers and applause]

Thank you so much.

Remember, this isn't
a rehearsal, kids.

There is no support act.

You are the main event.

Thank you all so much.
Thank you.

[Jennifer Holliday]
♪ You're the best man ♪

♪ I've ever known ♪

♪ There's no way
I can ever ever go ♪

♪ No no no no way ♪

♪ No no no no way
I'm living without you ♪

♪ Oh I'm not living
Without you ♪

♪ Not living without you ♪

♪ I don't want to be free ♪

♪ I'm staying ♪

♪ I'm staying ♪

♪ And you and you
And you ♪

♪ You're gonna love me ♪

♪ Oh hey ♪

♪ You're gonna love me ♪

♪ Yes you are ♪

♪ You will love me
You will love me ♪

♪ Love me ♪

♪ Love me love me ♪

♪ Love me ♪

♪ You're gonna love ♪

♪ Me ♪

[soft music playing]