The Last Laugh (2019) - full transcript

Shouldn't be anyone there.

- G'day. Been expecting you.
- Me?

Yeah, saw you a couple of miles back.
Got the fire going.

Thought you'd be here sooner.

I nearly didn't see it.

Only just did.

Yeah, well, it's good to see you.
Ed Mason.

I'm Greg Preston.
You Australian?

I give it away
every time I open me mouth, don't I?

Yeah, Trentham's the place.
About 58 miles northwest of Melbourne.

Long time no see.
Don't suppose I'll ever see it again.



- Well, where are your friends?
- Eh?

There are the marks of at least
three horses back there in the wood.

Proper little Indian scout, aren't you?

Mind you, you look more
like Tonto and the Lone Ranger

rolled into one with all that stuff on.
Regular one-man army.

Where's the war?

Where are your friends?

As a matter of fact, they're hiding.
Not for the reasons you're thinking.

See, you scared the living daylights
out of us.

We don't carry stuff like that.
It's too dangerous.

You gotta be careful, Greg.

All right, fellows,
you can come out now.

He ain't gonna bite you.

Hey, look, go easy, mate!
You've got the guns.



And we don't want any trouble.
You want any of our gear,

you just help yourself.
We won't try and stop you.

Go on, help yourself.

Well, there's nothing I want.
Just to be careful.

All right. Well, you hold the barrel
of that gun at my head

and we'll keep chatting on

and anything upsets you,
you pull the trigger, okay?

Yeah, well,
I don't have to be that careful.

Well, whatever you think
is a fair thing.

Whatever makes you feel at ease.

What's wrong with your saddle?

That's an old trick.

- Eh?
- I said, "That's an old trick. "

You're incredible!
You are more suspicious...

Would I be correct in thinking that
you've got a busted left stirrup?

You might.

Would I be equally correct in thinking
that you'd like it mended?

Dave, would you have a look and see
if you can fix this chappy's stirrup?

- Sure.
- Thanks.

Now, look, if these lads of ours
are upsetting you,

and I must admit
they're an ugly looking lot,

why don't you and me
just sit down here by the fire

and have a nice cup of coffee
and a chat.

Coffee?

Yeah, well, you're right
to be suspicious about that

but it's real coffee.

Found a couple of tins of it
in a deserted house.

Good to taste it again,
even if it is only instant.

Here you go.

- Great smell.
- Yeah.

How long since you've had some?

- Can't remember.
- Yeah.

Hard to imagine world
without instant coffee, isn't it?

Still, who could ever imagine...

Sheep-shearing, that's me caber.
Came over here about 10 years ago.

Work for three months of the year,
then spend nine months living it up.

Mediterranean, America, South America,
Caribbean.

You name it, I've been there.

Had a great time. Fantastic.

Then the big disaster struck
and that was the end of it.

Still plenty of sheep to shear.

Too many.
But the high life's gone.

Yeah, that's all gone for sure.

What about your friends?

Oh, we've met up
over the last six months or so.

None of us wanted to be tied down,

didn't like the idea of this permanent
settlement business.

So, we just move about the country,

offering our services
to whoever needs them.

What kind of services?

Oh, well, two of us are shearers.

Dave over there can fix
just about anything.

Real dab hand with his fingers,
if that makes sense.

Chris is an expert on roofing.
Slate, thatch or turf.

We break horses, do a bit of farming,
bit of bush-plumbing,

digging, carpentry.

You name it, we can do it.

There's always somebody who needs
a bit of help, extra pair of hands.

But you don't want to be tied down?

Nah, not if we can help it.

And what about you?

Well, I've been with about 20
settlements since this all started.

Bit of a glutton
for punishment, aren't you?

Yeah, I suppose I am.

But I just think that now, more than
ever, we gotta be organised.

We need cooperation and coordination.

Oh, strike me...

No, no, no. It doesn't have to be
as bad as it sounds.

I just got back from Norway.

- You what?
- Yeah. Norway.

How in the hell did you get there?

Oh, boat. Balloon first
from our place in...

You're that balloon fellow?

You're that bloke that's
floating all over the country?

Well, I was one of them, yeah.

Well, strike me lucky!
We found Quetzalc?atl.

Yeah, that balloon story's for real.

No, we kept hearing these rumours
about some joker

floating all over the place
in a balloon.

Sounded like a whole load of rubbish.

They said he was making notes on
people's settlements,

what they were growing,
all that sort of stuff.

He was supposed to come back,
but he never did.

Well, it sounded to me like
that Aztec legend, you know?

So, you are Quetzalc?atl.

Now, that's marvellous, eh?

Hi, what happened? Where's Greg?

Something must have cropped up.

It doesn't have to be bad.

It's not like Greg.
He's made every rendezvous in the past.

Well, you can try again tomorrow.

Or better still, wait here.
He knows at least where to come.

Yes, I suppose so.

- You see, Carlsson had made a list...
- Who?

The Norwegian.

He'd made a list of all the places
that he'd flown over.

People, what they had, crops,
their professions and so on.

And he had a plan of how
we should organise ourselves,

for our own benefit,
and of course for his.

So, I went to Norway just to see
how feasible it all was.

- And how feasible was it?
- It'll work okay.

But we gotta get ourselves
organised here first.

Do you reckon
there's anything in it for us?

Not in Norway, no.

But you could be more than useful
here in England.

Doing what?

Well, the same sort of thing
you're doing now

but on a more organised scale.

Don't like
that organised bit.

What do you reckon, fellows?
Any bright ideas?

What's the woman situation like
in Norway?

That's Chris for you. Straight in
with a deep philosophical question.

Oh, Chris, you're better off here.

Look, I can give you a list
of about 20 places

where your skills
would be really appreciated.

I promise you,
you won't be tied down completely.

I don't suppose one of you could drive
a steam train, hmm?

You must be joking.

So, what are you doing now?

I'm supposed to be getting in touch
with a doctor, a couple of days away.

- A real one?
- He's real enough, yeah.

- How do you know about this doctor?
- Carlsson's lists.

- You got these lists with you?
- They're in my saddlebag.

Well, if we're going to help out...

Listen, I got a map in my gear.

Bring us over
another cup of coffee, Dave.

Do you want another cup, Greg?

No, I'd better not.
Might want to steal the tin.

Just the one, Dave, and this time,
whack a spoon in it.

Well, now, we're about here.

You say this doctor of yours
is two days away.

Yeah.

- Oh. You sure, Greg?
- No, I won't.

Whereabouts...

Well, Quetzalc?atl,
you were careful.

But you weren't careful enough.

Let's carry him here.

We'll see how he floats.
Right there, Tilley.

Well, get him in, lads.

One, two!

Come on, lads.
Let's go see Ed, tell him he's gone.

Hey!
Hey!

Damn. Damn. Damn.

What's the matter?

These books, that's what's the matter.
They're all written in Norwegian.

Oh.

Does that mean we're not gonna be
very rich and contented?

Well, I don't know the flaming lingo,
do I? Do you?

The Captain's not going
to be pleased with you.

You killed the goose
that lays the golden egg.

Well, how was I to know he hadn't
translated the rotten things?

Perhaps he did it on purpose,
just in case.

Yeah, perhaps he was cleverer
than I thought.

Hasn't done him
much good though, has it?

- Nor us.
- Still, there's always the girl.

What girl?

That Norwegian's daughter. Agnes.

She might still be there
at that bloke's place. What was it?

Yeah, um...

Slot... Sloton Spencer.

Stuff written all over this too.

But it's in Norwegian.

All right. Now, get mounted up.

Hey, listen, what about this doctor?

First things first.
We'll pick him up on the way back.

And put that fire out too.

I rather fancy a Norwegian bird.

So where do you think
you're going?

That guy. Getting a watch.

Come on! You come back here,
you son of a...

Now, how many times
do I have to tell you jokers

the Captain doesn't want any bickering?

We've lost two men already
fighting amongst ourselves.

He's got a watch!

You know the rules.
Dave did it, he gets first choice.

Now, you be nice to him
and he might let you have the old one.

Off you go, Dave, and don't ruin
those new boots in that river.

Catch us up later.

Chris, you get back here.

Bastard.

- Shall I go back and get Dave?
- Yeah.

No, no. What the hell.

We can't afford to waste time
waiting for him.

Leave a sign on that tree.
He'll just have to catch us up. Come on.

- Get up. Come on.
- I'll put this on.

- Of course he does.
- Does he?

Guess what?

Who's that with Greg?

You don't need to say it.

"Why is he wearing Greg's coat?
Why is he riding Greg's horse?

"Who the hell is he
and who are his mates?" Am I right?

Something like that.

I know we're living in strange times

but your mate Greg would have to be
the most suspicious bloke

I've ever come across.

And I have a suspicion meself
that you're gonna be just as bad.

Seems they weren't too keen
on his ideas.

Didn't fancy losing their doctor for
a start-off and who could blame them?

So they set on him and beat him up.

He copped a couple of stab wounds
but he managed to get away.

Where did he meet up with you?

Oh, we found him on the roadside
a couple of days ago. Shocking state.

Well, where is he now?

We sent him back to our place
with a couple of the lads.

Seemed the right thing to do.

Now don't you worry, kids,
he's going to be all right.

I'd have thought
he would have wanted...

Yeah, he wanted to come here but,
well, to be quite honest with you,

I didn't think he was
in any condition to make it.

So he lent me his coat and his horse

and asked us to help out
in any way we could.

Oh, by the way,

he passed me to pass these
on to you, too, whatever they are.

Said they were too valuable
to fall into the wrong hands.

How you feeling?

You're a lucky lad.
That knife just missed the lung.

Yeah, well, I feel as if it hit
just about everything else.

Who did it?

Someone called Mason.
One of his friends.

You know him?
Ed Mason, he's an Australian.

No, never heard of him.

My name is John Powell
and this is Jim Irvine.

I'm Greg Preston.

Why?

Oh, they wanted some stuff
I was carrying.

They took it anyway.

What sort of stuff?

Oh, maps, lists of settlements.
This place, amongst others.

I was talking about this place
when they knifed me.

This place?

Yeah, I was showing them where you were,
why I was coming.

Suppose the temptation was too much.

Temptation?

Well, a list of all
the flourishing settlements.

All they had, crops,
people, professions.

What's so flourishing
about this place?

Well, you know that better than I do.

Who fixed me up? Dr Adams?

Who?

Dr Adams? Steven Adams.

Never heard of him.
I strapped you up.

Well, where's the doctor, then?

What doctor?
- Steven Adams.

- This is Cawston Farm?
- Yeah.

Yeah, well, there are 43 of you here.

Steven Adams is the leading line
of your group, your spokesman.

It's just him and me here.

Well, where are all the others?

What others?
- The other 40-odd people!

And Steven Adams.

- How long have you two been here?
- Since just after the Death.

Look, I know that
this is the right settlement.

I may make some mistakes
but I know I'm not wrong about this.

Cawston Farm,
43 people and Steven Adams.

You must have had a bump
on the head as well.

We're the only two people here.

We're the only two people
who have ever been here.

There's no Steven Adams.
Never has been.

You get some rest.
You sound as if you need it.

They were scattered round the area
where he crashed.

Fortunately, there was a dictionary.
Norwegian-English.

Otherwise we'd have been no better off.

Don't suppose they'd be much
good if you couldn't translate them.

Well, then we didn't need them,
because we'd found Agnes.

I wish we could. Where is she?

She was here, put the kettle on
and then she...

Well, she's around somewhere.

Chris has always wanted to meet
a Norwegian Sheila.

Bit game meself, actually.

Why'd you lock the door?

Did I? Must have been force of habit.

Why? You don't want to leave us already?

It's a nice view, isn't it?

You're very sick.

I shall have to tie you up.
Or down.

- Where's the other guy?
- Working.

- And where's Adams?
- He...

He's a figment of your imagination.

I'd forget all about him,
if I were you.

Might stop your recovery.

How did you know that the knife
just missed the lung?

A medical book.

There isn't a medical book there.
I've looked.

It's not the sort of thing that a layman
would know, so how did you?

You ask too many questions.

Yes, well, you don't give me
the answers I want.

What we want and what we get
are often two very different things!

Are you Adams?

You've really got a bee in your bonnet
about him, haven't you?

- There is no Adams!
- Well, there was!

Not here!
Your Norwegian friend got it wrong!

I never said he was Norwegian.

Yes, you did.

I never gave you his nationality.

I just said that he came here
by balloon.

Do you miss Jenny?

What?

I asked you if you missed your wife.

And if you ever wanted to see her again?

And what's that supposed to mean?

More questions.

I asked you if you missed your wife?

And the kids?

What are they called?
John? Lizzie?

You talk in your sleep! Nonstop!

About your wife, your family,
your friends.

And your Norwegian friend.

Why should she hide from us?

Who says she's hiding?

Look, ask her, not me.

- Is Agnes the only Norwegian?
- Yeah.

Anyone else who speaks
or reads Norwegian?

Just Agnes and Greg.

Hmm.

Well, she'd better turn up pretty soon.

Otherwise somebody could be
as indisposed as your mate Greg.

So you get her and quick.

I wouldn't do that, if I was you.

You've already been told
you ask too many questions.

If you're fit enough to snoop,
you're fit enough to leave.

First thing in the morning.

Now, get back inside.

Adams?

Adams?

How many times have
you been told mind your own business?

Now, get on your horse
and get out of here.

Adams?

- Adams.
Stay where you are.

- Look, Adams, I'm your friend.
Don't come in here.

I've come here to help you,
I've taken care of those two...

Go away! Go away!

Don't touch me! I have smallpox!

I thought you said
you like Norwegian Sheilas.

This one bites!

Lucky you.

So does this one.

Let her go.

What do you want with me?

Well, first of all, I want to know
why you ran off and hid.

We were very worried.

Worried about what?

Worried about what might happen
to your little friends

if you didn't show up.

You should always think of your friends.

Greater love and all that sort of stuff.

I've watched you and your friends
about the place.

I didn't see any sign of love.

Just thieves and murderers,
and liars.

I don't believe Greg is at your camp.

Then where is he?

Agnes, we've got a little problem.

Apart from being thieves,
murderers and liars.

And that is that your dad's books
are all written in Norwegian.

None of us speak or read Norwegian.

They're not available
in a translated form.

Which is most inconvenient for those
of us who'd like nothing better

than to curl up in front of a cosy fire
and read the likes of Ibsen and,

well, you know what I mean.

So, we would appreciate it...
No, no! I really mean it.

We would appreciate it if...

Now, I can see that you don't like us,
which is sad.

I can also see
that you don't intend to help us,

which is sadder.

Saddest of all...

There, there, there, there.
It's all right.

It's all right.

See, we work for this gentleman
called the Captain.

In many ways,
he's got the same ideas as your dad

but he's more rigid in his ways.

He doesn't like wasting time
and energy.

He's a great believer in discipline
and strength.

He also believes that sometimes

you have to be cruel to be kind.

And I believe that sometimes

you have to be very cruel.

Now, you sleep on it

and I want those translations
in the morning.

I called it smallpox because
I didn't know what it really was.

And some of the manifestations
were the same.

Shivering, headaches,
then the pustules.

The rate of infection
seemed to be almost immediate.

From contact to death, two weeks.

Those that died quicker
bled from the nose or mouth,

or had diarrhoea,
symptoms of typhoid.

Anyway, it's deadly.

I saw you burned the bodies.
Did they all go down with it?

All except those two outside.

You tried to do what the disease didn't.

Yes, some brave new world
I've been making.

The best laid plans...

The disease came here

because we wanted to
put the Norwegian's plans into action.

We started linking up,
exchanging personnel.

One of our own people came back
feeling unwell and there we were.

It just went on and on.

We tried quarantine,
that didn't work.

Because I thought it was smallpox,

I used two people who were vaccinated
just before the Death.

Didn't help them.

Did they all know what they were in for?

Oh, yes.
I think I can say we accepted it.

- And no deserters?
- Just one.

What happened?

We hunted him down, killed him.

Killed?

So you see?

We can all do terrible things
to each other for the best of reasons.

We tried to keep ourselves to ourselves

but we needed food, we had to trade.

No one found out.

As far as I know,
we didn't spread the disease.

We hoped it would die
with the winter coming but...

Why didn't one of those two
just tell me?

I didn't want you to know.

I didn't want any panic outside.

I wanted those two to have a chance
at making it without any taint

or suspicion they might
be carrying the disease.

You think any settlement
would've welcomed them

knowing what they've been through
and where they've come from?

How was it passed on?

Breath, touch, clothing...

I think even after we burned the bodies
there was some risk of infection.

Well, that doesn't leave me
much chance, does it?

You never know.

You do.

You'll know in the morning.

If you shiver, headaches, vomit,

then you've joined the club.

If you bleed from the mouth or nose,

you've got one week.

If you have none of those things,

saddle up your horse
and get the hell out of here.

Don't worry about us,
just think about yourself.

Promise.

Is there anything that I can do that...

I mean, anything
that's going to make any difference?

Nothing. Just wait and pray.

If I can remember the words.

- See you.
- I hope not.

I'm sorry.

- For a moment I thought...
- Only natural.

Now what?

Now you have to face up to die.

Probably seems stupid to you.

You don't feel any different
from yesterday

but you know different.

You've got two weeks, perhaps.

I've got two days,

perhaps three.

You're lucky, too.

Yeah, well, I'm beginning to be fed up
with people saying that I'm lucky.

Didn't you think you had died
when they stabbed you?

Not many people
have more than one death.

That hardly seems a reason
for self-congratulation.

Look, over there,
see that card on the wall behind you?

Turn it round.

Blunt, isn't it?

We put that up for the infected to see.
It worked.

We all have to go sometime.

I always thought
it was the way we went that mattered.

Great poets say it in
the greatest, simplest way.

"Nothing became his life so much

"as the leaving of it. "

You know what Gerard Manley Hopkins'
last words were?

"Happy. Oh, so happy. "

Well, they won't be mine.

They might be.

Well, didn't William Pitt ask for
a pork pie or something?

What will you ask for?

A chance to wake up
and find that I've dreamt all of this.

Yes.

Yes.

Someone once said
that if you were afraid of death,

the best thing to do was to
think of how you'd like to die

and then pray for it.

But you're not a religious man, are you?

Though I'm thinking of joining
whichever group works the most miracles.

No. I don't see you as a martyr.

A soldier's death might appeal to you.

Leading your troops, falling in battle,

posthumous VCs, brave.

- Stupid.
- Yes, that sounds like me.

Except I've not so much been
leading the troops

as chasing round the country
trying to find them.

I'd have done better just to have
stayed at home with Jenny and the kids.

Are you going to miss them?
Are they going to miss you?

Of course I'm going to miss them.
But I'm the one that's going

and there are a lot of things
that I'd have liked to have done.

Like what?

Oh, I was thinking about it last night.

I couldn't sleep.

Strangely enough.

But I...

I couldn't remember one moment of
gentle tenderness with my wife.

- Wife?
- Jenny.

The mother of my son.

I mean, there were moments,

but I just couldn't
ever remember saying,

ever telling her that I loved her.

It's stupid, I know, but...

I used to think about that
when I was in Norway

and I always said that I'd make up
for it when I saw her again.

You haven't seen her?

I don't think she needed to be told.

Perhaps not.

Oh, God, I'd have liked to.

And I don't like the idea of
just sitting around here waiting.

You don't have to.

You mean that I could go home?

No, I meant quite simply
you don't have to wait around here.

You've got two weeks to do something.

I could pay a visit to Mason
and his friends.

You don't look too happy about that.

I'm a doctor, don't expect me to.

They'll only be getting
what they deserve.

And your friends, too?

I can make sure I avoid them.

Mason will have guards out.

But they'll be expecting the man
who killed me.

I'm wearing his clothes,
I'll be riding his horse.

That barn shouldn't be difficult.

All right,
let's suppose you manage that.

Then what?

Then what I'd like to do is
to go back to their camp

and infect everyone
from the Captain downwards.

And everyone else they might
come in contact with, good or bad?

I could always bring them here...

to see you. A visit to the doctor.

They won't have our discipline.
What's to keep them here?

You and me, while we're alive.

And those two outside.

Don't you think those two have
gone through enough, done enough?

Yes, I think they have.

I think you all have.

You've made a great sacrifice.

But if Mason and his gang get going,
then there are going to be

a hell of a lot people who are
going to be dead or miserable.

And mostly innocent people.

And the sacrifice you've all made
is going to be pretty pointless.

You realise
you're sinking to their level?

Everyone has a right to die with
dignity, no matter what they've done.

There's no other way.

They are a hundred different ways, Greg.

Not for me.

Go on, ask them.

Here, take this.

It's not to threaten them with.
It's a present.

I've had it 20 years.

It's been looked after,

it's loaded, it works.

I'd like you to have it.

But if things get bad for you,
you might want to...

"Undiscovered country from whose bourn

"No traveller returns, puzzles the will

"And makes us rather bear
those ills we have

"Than to fly to others we know not of?"

I don't want to fly anywhere.

I want to travel slowly.

I want to enjoy my death.
Taste it, savour it, experience it.

Wish I'd known what it was like
to be born.

I'm going to know what it's like to die.
Looking forward to it.

Journey of discovery.

Go on.

Ask them.

Then come and tell me what they say.

Well, how are we this morning?

In a more cooperative mood, I trust?

Time's winged chariot on her own.

But your little cart worked for only
a short time. Yes or no?

No.

All right, send the kid out.

No, thanks, I've already got one.

I want those notes translated.
I'm not interested in free gifts.

Look at it.

Swiss made, anti-magnetic,
shockproof and waterproof.

Pity the man it belonged to wasn't.

Chris!

Leave me alone, please.

Have a look at that.

- It's Dave's.
- Mmm-hmm.

- Where did you get it?
- From his dead body in the river.

Stripped, where Greg left him.

He went from there to Adams
and he'll me here soon with help.

I told him once before
he's a real glutton for punishment.

And don't you look so pleased
with yourself, sweetheart.

You just let the cat out of the bag
and we'll be waiting for the cat.

And thanks to you, we now know
what he's going to be wearing.

Dave's hat and Dave's horse.

- Is anyone with him?
- No.

- Lamb to the slaughter.
- Shall we tell Mason?

No. Let's do it now, then tell Ed.

Tilley? Did you get him?

Tilley!

Tilley! Tilley!

- Greg!
- Wait a minute.

Well, Quetzalc?atl
back from the dead, eh?

Well, if you want your men
back from the dead,

we'd better have a chat.

Fair enough. What about?

About me working for whoever it is
you call the Captain.

I'm serious.

- Greg!
- Shut up!

Now, don't be too hard on her.

It's come as a bit of a surprise
to all of us.

Well, it's a surprise to me
and it doesn't make it any less true.

Greg, you know what these people are.

How can you even think
of working with them?

I told you to shut up once!

I don't like him
and I don't like his friends.

And I probably
won't like the Captain, either.

But if I can get
what I want through them

then I'm prepared to put up with them.

Do you really think
they'll let you do what you want?

They only want my father's books
and the information in them.

I mean it.
Now, I'll give you what you want

if you'll just give me a chance
to make you see things another way.

But what about the people
who've helped you?

Your friends, the family, the kids?

I'm not interested in the family
or the kids!

Tell them that yourself! John!

Just stay where you are!

Go on. Tell them that you don't care.

Tell them that you're going to
go off with these people.

- Greg, he's your...
- He's my nothing!

He's a stupid, useless kid!

And I haven't got the time
to waste on him.

Then what about Paul? He's inside.

You're not going to turn his future
over to them.

They're not interested in people.

Do you know how many people
are alive at Adams'? Three.

Your father said it was
a perfect example for the future.

But you know why there are only three?

Because they were soft like you.

Because they dithered
and listened to other people's opinions.

Well, that may have been all right
before the Death but it won't work now.

Whether we like it or not,
it's going to need men

like him and the Captain
to get things straight.

- Greg, you know that isn't true...
- Now, stay where you are.

That's typical.

You don't listen.
You've got to make gestures.

You haven't got a hope in hell
by yourselves.

Well, I'm fed up carrying you.

If he'll take me, I'm going with him.

As far as I'm concerned,
you can all rot in hell.

All right, Greg, we'll get packed up
if I can have me merry men back.

Down there.

You all right?

Yeah, I'm fine. Just bored.

Bright pair you two turned out to be.

You're about as weak as his mob.

But what's the point of killing him
if he wants to join us?

I suppose you thought of that
while he was jumping you, eh?

It will save us a lot of bother.

You know I've sheared sheep
with more brains than you've got?

- Listen, I thought...
- You thought? You never thought.

- He's got no intention of helping us.
- What was all that about, then?

He just wants to con us off the place.

Oh, that guy, he shot him.

Didn't kill him, though, did he?

No, he's laying it on
as thick as he can.

- I could get him now.
- No, no, no.

We'll play him along a bit.
Find out what he's really up to.

We can always get rid of him
and come back later.

Come on.

Can I at least pass on
a message to your wife?

Or does she matter less than your son?

You can tell her that I love her.

You can say that I'm following
in the footsteps of Paul.

Oh, I'm sure that'll be
a great comfort to her.

I'm sorry about your arm, Jack.

But you gotta learn
to do as you're told.

When I say stay away, I mean stay away.

So, goodbye.

And a special Norwegian goodbye to you.

Greg!
John, stay here.

- But he's going.
- Stay here. Don't move.

Had a blinding revelation on the road
to Damascus, did you?

St Paul became a Christian,
not a bandit.

He has smallpox.

What?

Greg has smallpox.

That is what he said.
It wasn't goodbye.

He just said, "I have smallpox. "

Oh, my God.

- Is that it?
- Yep, that's Adams' place.

Okay, Greg.

The gun. Just a precaution.
You gotta be careful.

Great bit of shooting back there.

Yeah, it's a great gun.
I aimed at least 10 feet to his right.

You've got a nosebleed.

So I have.

That's nothing to laugh about.