The Barkleys of Broadway (1949) - full transcript

Josh and Dinah Barkley are a successful (though argumentative) musical-comedy team, yet Dinah chafes as Galatea to her husband's Pygmalion. When serious playwright Jacques Barredout envisions her as a great dramatic actress, Dinah is not hard to persuade. - stop by if you're interested in the nutritional composition of food
♪ You'll adore the step ♪
♪ that everyone's been waiting for. ♪

♪ You'll find a crowd on
every dancing floor. ♪

♪ Because of something called ♪
♪ the Swing Trot, remember Swing Trot. ♪

♪ It's a deal, ♪
♪ it's very simple with terrif appeal. ♪

♪ You grab a partner when you hear a band ♪
♪ and you're the greatest dancer in the land. ♪

♪ It's bill and coo-y ♪ ♪ Tea for two-y. ♪

♪ Just watch your partner's eyes grow dewy. ♪

♪ Entre nous-y, you're slightly screwy. ♪

♪ But irresistible. ♪

♪ On and on. ♪
♪ Oh, what a natural they hit upon. ♪

♪ It gets you going till you're really gone ♪
♪ and you will never rue the day. ♪

♪ The day you realize ♪
♪ the Swing Trot is here to stay. ♪

Thank you again, ladies and gentlemen.

We're overjoyed
at this wonderful reception of...

our third show together...

and I think I speak
for my two lifelong partners...

my charming wife
and Ezra Millar, the composer...

when I say that none of us
could have done it without the other two.

I don't know.
I done it before without you two.

Four shows, four flops.

Ezra, the score to this is just wonderful.
I feel you should get all the credit.

I do too.

Incidentally, while we're patting
each other on the back...

what about your little woman?

She contributed something to the occasion.

Thank you, ladies and gentlemen.
But what would my performance be...

without my husband
Josh Barkley's clever lyrics...

and brilliant direction?

Ladies and gentlemen,
I'm sure that my lyrics and direction...

would mean absolutely nothing...

without my clever and brilliant wife
to perform them.

But, ladies and gentlemen,
I merely perform the material...

the way my husband taught and directed me.

But, ladies and gentlemen,
in the hands of a talent...

such as my lovely wife Dinah's...

any material would look
pretty darned wonderful.

- But, ladies and gentlemen...
- Ladies and gentlemen...

this meeting
of the mutual admiration society...

is now adjourned. Thank you, and good night.

- Sign my book.
- Just one more. Please sign.

Just one more.

There you are.
All right. That's the last one now.

- We got to go.
- I'm going.

- Where are you going?
- Have a good time.

- Goodbye.
- Have a nice time.

- Allow me, madam.
- Thank you sir.

Must we go to old lady Belney's party?
It's so nice here.

But we have to. Opening night party
at Mrs. Livingston Belney's.

My dear, it's a state law.

Opening night.
It was wonderful, though, wasn't it?

- Everything went so smoothly.
- It just goes to show...

all those little troubles along the way
just don't matter now.

Like those silly little rows we had
in rehearsal and on the road.

Darling, did you really mean
all those things you said about me...

in your curtain speech?

Honey, of course I did.

It was your show tonight. I could feel it.

Then you mean it was really all right?

All right? Why, you were terrific.

You got all your laughs, your timing,
every gesture, perfect.

Oh, thank you darling.

Of course, if I wanted to be a...
Well, it didn't amount to anything.

There was one place in the subway scene...

that maybe you could gotten
a little more out of.

But, well...


No, it was nothing. It was just a...

No, what was wrong? I want to know.

It was just a detail.

Probably opening night nerves.
We'll talk about it later.

I want to talk about it now.
I won't sleep a wink tonight...

- worrying about it.
- Nothing to worry about, drop it.

You brought it up.
You think you can sit here, criticizing me...

I don't want to go into it.
It's just a detail.

It's always just a detail.

A detail here, a detail there,
and then it starts to grow.

Pick, pick, pick on everything I do.
It's just...

What was it?

Well, if you must know...

I just thought you could
put a little more drama in there.

A little more emotion.
The audience wants to cry there.

You didn't let them. You owe it to them.

- Good evening.
- Good evening.

- Did it ever occur to you that you...
- The doorman.


There they are. Welcome, my darlings.

- Josh. Dinah.
- What?

- I got something important to tell you.
- I got to talk to you.

- Hurry up.
- What's the secret?

What are you doing? Stop it.

Well, what?

- What is the matter?
- Nothing.

I thought I rescue you from the squares.

- Thanks, pal.
- I wondered.

In the nick of time Ezra, that's my name.

- Come on. Have some coffee.
- No, thanks.

Like during those curtain speeches.
If I hadn't stopped you...

you have been at each others' throats
in another second.

What do you mean at each others throats?

- We meant every word we said. Didn't we?
- Of course.

Ezra, you exaggerate this thing
about our fighting much too much.

- Sure.
- After all, we haven't had a fight in weeks.

- In weeks.
- Of course not.

I apologize for what happened
in the car, Dinah.

I'm sorry. I apologize to you.

And I apologize to both of you
for having let you out of my sight.

It's my fault.

Hey, Cleo. Where have you been?

I beg your pardon, Mr. Millar.
This lady happens to be my wife.

Congratulations. Are you happy in your work?

- Cleo?
- Looking for me, baby?

Why don't you wear an X
on your forehead? Come on, follow me.

There's Mrs. Belney.
She's going to ask us to perform.

Let's duck. Mrs. Belney.

- Excuse us. I'm sorry.
- Thank you very much.

- Excuse us, please.
- I know what let's do.

- What?
- We'll fill these plates...

- smuggle them under our coats, go home.
- We can't.

- This whole thing is for us.
- There must be a place we can be alone.

- Well, I know, but...
- Let's go out on the terrace.

Honey, there's snow out there.

I'll get your wrap. We'll have a picnic.

- Wonderful.
- Fine. Now you pile up your plate...

and follow me out there.
Bring a knife and fork.

I'll probably freeze to death.

May I be of some assistance, Mrs. Barkley?

Thank you, yes.

- Would you mind holding that?
- Not at all.

We haven't met. I'm Jacques Barredout.

How do you do? Of course.

I should've recognized you
from your pictures.

I'm glad you didn't. They're frightful.

The only good one I have
is rather indecent, I'm afraid.

Taken on a bearskin rug
at the age of three months.

I have one of those too.

- You do?
- Yes.

I'm quite an admirer of your plays.

I understand you're just finishing a new one.

It's just about finishing me.
My most serious effort. I plan to direct it.

How nice.

I only hope it will be half as successful...

as your little musical extravaganza.
I was there tonight.

- Well, the audience seemed to like it.
- Unfortunately, I did not.

- Well, at least you're honest.
- Now, don't be angry, please.

I don't care for musical comedy in general.

- But this one for a special reason.
- And what was that?


You're wasted in musical comedy.
You could be a great tragic actress.

Monsieur Barredout,
you really don't mean that.

I do.

There was one moment in particular
I was moved to tears, the subway scene.

Shall we?

The subway scene.

And who knows?
Sarah Bernhardt, Eleonora Duse...

in this crass, modern, commercial theater
might have ended up in musical comedy...

just as you have done. Don't you see?

Oh, but it's so utterly silly of you
to compare me...

with those inspired immortals.

After all...

But you really did think
in the subway scene I had some of their...

Their quality. Mais out.

How extraordinary.

Only a few minutes ago
I was talking to someone...

who didn't think
I had the emotional gift at all.

- He must be a complete idiot.
- Well, it's interesting to get both...

- Oh. Darling, where have you been?
- Siberia.

Bless you.

I got into the most interesting
conversation with Monsieur Barredout.

Allow me to present Monsieur Barredout.
Mr. Husband.

- Barkley's the name.
- How do you do?

- How do you do?
- I was telling your wife...

- I seen your show tonight and I think...
- Don't tell him.

- Charming.
- Thanks.

And now, Mrs. Barkley,
I hope we meet again...

now that we have a bearskin rug in common.

- Will you excuse me?
- Certainly.

- Au revoir.
- Au revoir.

Don't you think we ought to...

Where are they? Oh, there you are.

You're not going?
Darlings, I want you to come...

do the little number you did.

Sorry, I can't sing, I have a terrible cold.

I may not be able to do
the show tomorrow night.

But, Millie, I'm in beautiful voice tonight.

Don't you think you better play?

Listen everyone, Ezra's going to play.

- Good.
- Oh, that's wonderful.

You know my favorite darling. Pale Fingers.

Did anybody here ask for the Sabre Dance?

- I like to hear Campanella.
- Rhapsody in Blue.


- Sabre Dance, anybody?
- Oh, no.

Well, if you insist.

Opening night.

Some opening night.

All right. What about opening night?

Big sentimental occasion.

Our moment of triumph.
And what do I find you doing?

Flirting with a stuffed dinner jacket.

- Flirting?
- Flirting.

- Oh darling, how perfectly ridiculous.
- Yeah.

I was just sitting there...

- talking to the man, that's all.
- Sure, naturally.

- And I couldn't get away.
- You couldn't get away.

And I'm out there
on that terrace catching my death of cold.

A lot you care if I have to do
the show from an oxygen tent.

An oxygen tent. Oh, really.

I been sneezing and coughing like a Model T.

You haven't had a hint of a sneeze
for over an hour.

I'll bet you're sorry I'm not sneezing.

- Go find a nice draft, sneeze your head off.
- I will not.

Oh darling, don't be so childish.

- A lot of sympathy a fellow gets here.
- You're tired, so am I.

- I could stay in bed for a week.
- Could be in bed for a week...

and nobody would give a hang.

- What's the matter with...
- Did you say something?

For all you care,
I still be out on that terrace frozen blue...

and you still be inside
simpering at that half-stuffed...

- Oh, Josh.
- Oh, Josh.

I really don't know
what to think of Mr. Barredout.

He said some of the silliest,
most stupid things.

Let's hear some of those stupid things
you were so afraid he repeat to me.

Well, if you really must know,
he just hated the show.

Did he? I'm glad. Now I know it's good.

- He hated...
- And the funniest thing of all...

is that he thought I was at my best
in the subway scene.

Oh, no.

He says I'm a great tragic actress...

wasted in musical comedy.

You, a tragic actress?

I'm glad you told me.
Now I know he's a complete imbecile.

He's not such an imbecile as all that.

After all,
before I really went into the theater...

in high school, I played Juliet.

Romeo, Romeo.

Wherefore art thou, Romeo?

- Who played Romeo?
- Mildred Higgins. She was...

It's possible that Monsieur Barredout
could see things in me...

- that you don't appreciate.
- Don't get any silly notions in your head.

- You're a song and dance girl.
- That's all you ever allowed me to do.

- What?
- That's all you ever allowed me to do.

Allowed you? Why, you couldn't walk
across the stage without me.

There isn't a gesture you do
that I didn't teach you.

That's a lie.

It took a lot of patience
to put you where you are.

- Patience?
- I worked. I pulled things out of you.

- I think that's going...
- I molded you like...

- Oh, sure.
- Like Svengali did Trilby.

- Svengali?
- Yeah, the guy with the beard, that's me.

- Why, you cheap...
- Go ahead. Throw it.

Thank you, and good night.

- Blood.
- Blood?

- Blood? Darling, what have I done?
- Nothing. It's just concussion, that's all.

- Darling, no. What have I done?
- I don't know.

Please come in here, let me fix it.
I'll put water on it.

- Looks like a fractured skull.
- Let me fix it for you. You have a hanky?

What with walking pneumonia and concussion...

a fine performance I'll give tomorrow night.

I'm so sorry. I'm so...

- Oh, it's stopped bleeding.
- It has?

- Yes. You're going to be all right.
- I am?

Dearest, I'm horrible. I'm just horrible.

I know what let's do.

Come on. Now, hit me.

- In cold blood?
- Well, Come on. I deserve It.

You look so brave
and you didn't even ask to be blindfolded.

- I just can't.
- I insist upon being punished.

All right. You asked for it.

- Thank you darling.
- Thank you.

- I love you.
- I love you too, baby.

I know what let's do. Let's go downstairs...

- and fix some scrambled eggs and toast.
- I'm not hungry.

- But we didn't eat at the party.
- Sure. You were so busy, I was...

- Now, now...
- I'm sorry.

I'll go get your robe.

You must keep nice and warm.
We'll turn on the heat downstairs.

Hey, let's light the fire.

Here you are darling.
Oh, you shouldn't smoke.

It isn't good for your cold.

I have a confession to make.
I haven't got a cold.

I know it.

♪ All that I know. ♪

♪ Is you be hard to replace. ♪

♪ Where else in all the world. ♪

♪ Such loveliness and such grace? ♪

♪ The poet often chanted. ♪

♪ The love he found divine. ♪

♪ But never was he granted. ♪

♪ A lady-love like mine. ♪

♪ Deep down, deep down inside. ♪

♪ My secret heart knows. ♪

♪ The more that I'm with you. ♪

♪ The more and more my rapture grows. ♪

♪ Without you at ♪ ♪ my side I fear. ♪

♪ No future could I face. ♪

♪ For you be. ♪

♪ Oh, so hard to replace. ♪

Hello, Ezra.

For the producer of a hit show,
you look awful sad. What's up, Bert?

- I'm worried, Ezra. Just sit down.
- What about? The show closing in 1953?

I'm worried about Josh and Dinah.

They haven't had a fight
since the show opened.

They got a peace pact.

That's just it.
This tension is too much for me.

All this calm, all this lovey-dovey.
I don't quite trust it.

Ezra, we got to get an understudy for Dinah.

Don't look at me, I'm knock-kneed.

Come on up on the stage.

There's a cute kid from the chorus
I had my eye on for some time.

I want you to listen to her.

Dinah's never had an understudy.
She's not going to like it.

Someone will have to break it to her gently.

- I'll bet I'm elected.
- Shirlene.

- Yes?
- Ezra, this is Shirlene May.

Hello, Mr. Millar.
I'm just scared to death...

to sing for such a talented composer
as you are.

I'll let you know about that later.
What are you going to sing?

Mrs. Barkley's blues song from the show.

- Good.
- Ok, Shirlene.

Well, if you all are ready, I am.

I'm going to sing.

- Hello, everybody.
- Hi.

- Look who dropped in.
- What are you doing here?

- We like to rehearse.
- In the middle of the night, isn't it?

- See you. I better get back.
- Wait a minute.

We're caught with our understudy showing.

- Understudy?
- Understudy?

Josh, Dinah, come here a minute.
I want you to...


It's like this.
In case anything ever happened...

I mean, in case the two of you
just sometime...

What he means is,
if you two ever quarrel and you decide...

not to go on some night, Dinah.
Bert felt you should've an understudy.

- Nothing wrong with that. Wonderful idea.
- Why not?

- What?
- We don't object, do we?

Of course not. You won't need one.

- Wonderful.
- Mr. Millar, excuse me. Can I sing now?

- Of course. Go right ahead.
- Fine. Thanks.

- Honey.
- Yes?

Dinah, this is Miss Shirlene.

Hello, Mrs. Barkley. Oh, hello.

- Cute.
- She's going to sing your blues number.

I hope I remember it.
I'm so frightened in front of all my bosses.

- I guess I shouldn't have said that.
- Don't be silly. We're all your friends.

- Why, sure.
- Go on, Shirley.

- Thanks. It's Shirlene.
- Shirlene, I'm sorry.

Thank you.


- Is this all right?
- Yeah, fine. Go ahead.

Joe, please.

I'm going to sing.

It's not necessary
to make Shirley audition...

- Shirlene.
- Yes, I know, dear.

She'll be perfect for the part.

Let's start our rehearsal
or we won't get it done.

- Break it up. Here we go.
- We have a long dance.

You're it.
Come on. We'll go up to the office.

- Thanks. Thanks awfully.
- All right.

You all been so wonderful to me
and I want to thank you.

And, Mrs. Barkley,
I'm going to learn your part real good.

I'll probably never get to do it,
but, well, you never can tell, can you?

Well, I guess that's show business. Bye.

Josh, what about lunch?

Can't do it. We have to rehearse this number.

It goes in the show tonight.
And then we to go...

to the gallery where that fellow's
got that portrait...

for publicity or something of us.

- The art gallery?
- Yeah.

Well, that's show business.

I didn't think she was as cute as all that.

Not quite as cute as all that, Mr. Barkley.

Your worries are over.
With that hunk of fluff in the wings...

why, Dinah would go on with two broken legs.

All right. Go.

Principle between art forms...

- and formed art. The secret...
- It's here. I'll get Ladi.

The Barkleys are here. Are you ready?


Mr. Ladislaus Ladi, the Barkleys.

Mr. Barkley, Mrs. Barkley,
this is a great pleasure.

I never met you, but now that I see you...

I realize how perfectly I captured you.

I hope you will admire my crude efforts.

I'm sorry to be so stupid...

but why am I a pancake?

As I see you, you are creative union.

You, creative frying pan...

in which the shapeless, raw batter, you...

are transformed by creative miracle...

into irresistible pancake.

It is Pygmalion breathing life on Galatea...

or like, who's that fellow...

- With the beard?
- Yeah.

- Svengali.
- Yeah.

- Yes.
- Only impression, of course.

Naturally, it's only an impression.

I am very grateful for the explanation.

If you'll forgive me, I'll go now.


What's the matter, honey?

Did you hear what he said? Svengali.

If that's what everybody thinks,
there must be something to it.

After all, these are just total strangers...

Darling. How divine.

We come all the way from the country
to see your portrait.

- Well, it's...
- You remember Monsieur Barredout?

- Hello.
- Mrs. Barkley, Mr. Barkley.

How are you? We were just leaving.

Oh, wait a moment.
I'm perishing for the sight of your portrait.

I hear it's brilliant.

- It's right up there.
- Well, come along.

I'm sure it's perfectly dreadful.

Ladi is nothing better
than a tenth-rate surrealist.

I'm so glad to hear you say that.

You know, for a minute I was just
a little afraid he might make sense.

I very much doubt
that he could possibly capture you.

I guess we better hurry.
Got to put on the old feedbag.

Wait, you impulsive children.
Always scurrying.

I can never pin you down.
I want you for next Sunday in the country.

It's for Jacques. He's finished his play.

- How nice. Congratulations.
- Thank you.

Well, we like... I think it's all...
I don't... Josh.

Josh, where are you?

You must come.
We'll all sit around an open fire...

and roast a few old chestnuts.

And then possibly later,
we can roast my play.

Please try to come.

Well, we'll see.

Oh, no. I don't believe we could, because,
you see...

we have tickets for the symphony.

Yes, I'm terribly sorry, Millie.
Josh, we really must go.

- It's nice to have seen you.
- There's no symphony...

- Why didn't you help me out?
- I didn't think you wanted me to.

You didn't want to go.

- Do you?
- No.

Then why the hesitation? All you have
to say is, I'm sorry, can't make it.

You acted as flustered
as a schoolgirl at a prom.

You flustered me.

What kind of talk is that?
Got to go put on the old feedbag.

That fellow brings out the gangster in me.
Stick to the subject.

- If you want to go, go.
- I don't want to go.

But if you want to go,
I'm not going to try to hold you back.

I wish we never gone to that exhibition,
then this wouldn't have come up.

Dinah, every time you come in contact
with that fellow Barredout...

you been affected in a very peculiar manner.

Every time? I only met the man twice.

He's got some kind of strange hold on you.

Look, let's get the cast
of characters straight.

You're Svengali, remember?
How many do I need?

- Excuse me. I should've knocked.
- Yes, you should've.

Well, now that I'm inside,
apologies and all that.

I wanted to ask you
about that makeup base you use.

- Please don't. I'm fixing my eyes.
- I'm sorry.

In case I ever do go on,
I like to look like you.

- It's Number four.
- Is it really?

Well, it looks wonderful on you.

That's funny. I tried it once, you know,
and it just looked awful on me.

I thought maybe I was allergic or something.

I took it back to the store
and the girl there said:

Well, it's all right
for a different type of skin.

Mine's much too delicate.
Now, isn't that ridiculous?

Yes, as a kid they used to call me
Old Elephant-hide.

- I didn't mean...
- Shirley.

- It's Shirlene, dear.
- Do you mind? We haven't much time.

Of course not. Pardon the intrusion.

It's just that I'm so willing to learn,
Mr. Barkley...

Well, I'll be watching you. Bye.

♪ Though we're called ♪
♪ a people of serious mind ♪

♪ 'Tis often we dance, 'tis often we sing. ♪

♪ And being as human as all humankind. ♪

♪ We aren't superior to having a fling ♪

♪ I'm taking the fling of a lifetime. ♪

♪ The fling of a husband and wife-time. ♪

♪ When I went romancing ♪

♪ I gave no thought to any wedding ring. ♪

♪ Every bonny lassie. ♪

♪ Was my highland fling. ♪

♪ No chance was I chancing ♪

♪ I'm not the man you dangle on a string ♪

♪ I was canny waiting. ♪

♪ For the real, real thing. ♪

♪ Though I danced each girl ♪
♪ in a twist and twirl. ♪

♪ Na' one would do. ♪

♪ And I went my way till the fatal day. ♪

♪ In the fling I was flung with you. ♪

♪ Oh, now. ♪

♪ My heart is prancing gay as a lark. ♪

♪ And happy as a king. ♪

♪ The years I'll weather. ♪

♪ In the hame or on the heather. ♪

♪ With my one and only highland fling. ♪

♪ I thought you were falling ♪
♪ for Andy MacPherson. ♪

♪ Nay, nay, he became an impossible person. ♪

♪ But what about you ♪
♪ and that Connie MacKenzie? ♪

♪ She talked when I putted ♪
♪ and drove me to frenzy. ♪

♪ But what of the lad ♪
♪ known as Bobby Macdougal? ♪

♪ It pays to be thrifty,
but he was too frugal. ♪

♪ And weren't you daft ♪
♪ about Megan McDermott? ♪

♪ I tasted her cooking ♪
♪ 'would make me a hermit. ♪

♪ How jealous I was ♪
♪ of McDonald McCutcheon. ♪

♪ His neck had a head on ♪
♪ but there wasn't much in. ♪

♪ And what about Sandy? ♪

♪ His hands were too handy ♪
♪ And wasn't there a Jenny? ♪

♪ I'm not wanting any ♪

♪ I'm not wanting any but you. ♪

♪ When I went a-dancing. ♪

♪ No special lad I was encouraging. ♪

♪ Every lackly laddie was. ♪

♪ My highland fling. ♪

♪ No glance I was glancing. ♪

♪ Well, nothing really worth a-mentioning. ♪

♪ Hoping, watching, waiting. ♪

♪ For the real, real thing. ♪

♪ Though they spoke me soft ♪
♪ in the moonlit oft'. ♪

♪ Na' one would do. ♪

♪ Till it came to pass to this lucky lass. ♪

♪ In a fling I was flung with you. ♪

♪ Now my heart is prancing ♪

♪ Nothing about you I be altering. ♪

♪ The years I'll weather. ♪

♪ In the hame or on the heather. ♪

♪ With me one and only highland fling. ♪

Are you all right, Mrs. Barkley?

Yes, I'm all right.

This may sound
like awful prima Donna stuff...

but I can't stand that girl.

Now, it isn't as bad as all that, is it?

Yes, it is. She gives me the heebie-jeebies.

Every time I turn around,
there she is staring at me.

Now, don't get jumpy about her, honey.

I'll rehearse her in the afternoons
and keep her out of the wings, all right?

If you don't get jumpy
whenever I see that silly Barredout man.

No, I won't. The next time I see him
I'll go out of my way to be nice to him.

That's better.

- You know something?
- What?

I think you and I could use
a little relaxation...

sort of a Sunday in the country or something.

We'll go to Millie's, and I promise you
when I see Barredout...

I'll treat him like a long-lost cousin.

- That's my baby.
- Yeah.

Ezra, get a whiff of that fresh air.

Can I go home now?

- Hello, there.
- Hello.

- Let me take those bags sir.
- Yeah.

- How far is the house from here?
- About half a mile, madam.

- Let's walk.
- No.

- Come on.
- Say, that's a great idea.

It will put the color back in those cheeks.

They're my favorite color now.
A nice healthy green.

- Go ahead, driver.
- Yes sir.

- We turn right at the fork, don't we?
- Yes sir. Then left at Pinetop Road.

Fine. Now I remember. Thank you.

With golf and tennis around you
And no cares to hound you.

♪ When Mother Nature beckons, ♪
♪ who can decline? ♪

♪ Till Mother Nature vetoes ♪
♪ The bees and mosquitoes. ♪

♪ Mother Nature is no mother of mine. ♪

♪ From Saturday night to Monday morn, ♪
♪ There's always joy ahead. ♪

♪ From Saturday night to Monday morn, ♪
♪ I wish that I were dead. ♪

♪ A weekend in the country ♪
♪ Never will let you down. ♪

♪ You'll pardon my effrontery ♪
♪ I rather spend it in town. ♪

♪ A weekend in the country ♪
♪ Healthy and full of sport. ♪

♪ And then it isn't small potatoes. ♪

♪ When you get those fresh tomatoes ♪

♪ I a list of fresh tomatoes ♪
♪ Suing me now in court. ♪

♪ Oh, give me the milk from the moo-cow. ♪

♪ Of corn right from the field, I'm fond. ♪

♪ In town I be splurging ♪
♪ On venison and sturgeon. ♪

♪ Beside a beautiful blonde. ♪

♪ A weekend gets you sunburned ♪
♪ Vitamin A you win ♪

♪ I rather get back unburned ♪
♪ With my original skin. ♪

♪ A weekend in the country ♪
♪ Glorious, there's no doubt. ♪

♪ A weekend in the country ♪
♪ What's the next train out? ♪

♪ A weekend in the country ♪
♪ Trees in the orchard call. ♪

♪ When you examined one tree ♪
♪ Then you examined them all. ♪

♪ A weekend in the country ♪
♪ Happily we endorse. ♪

♪ Come get your share of nature's bounty. ♪

♪ Ride the trail around the county ♪

♪ I am no Canadian Mountie ♪
♪ Why do I need a horse? ♪

♪ Hark, hark to the song of the bullfrog. ♪

♪ At dawn, you rise up with the lark. ♪

♪ When roosters run riot ♪
♪ I much prefer the quiet. ♪

♪ Of Forty-Second and Park. ♪

♪ Get peppy and alivey ♪
♪ Don't be a city poke ♪

♪ I once got poison ivy. ♪

♪ Will you try for poison oak? ♪

♪ A weekend in the country. ♪

♪ Dickey-bird's overhead. ♪

♪ A weekend in the country ♪
♪ I should stood in bed. ♪

Good morning, Jacques, dear genius boy.

Good morning.

I must say good morning
to all my other guests. Good morning.

- Darling, that was a wonderful shot.
- I liked it too.

It's Dinah Barkley.

And Josh Barkley.

Oh, yes, and Josh.

Hello, there, Millar. I didn't see you.

It is a bit foggy, isn't it?

Hi, Jackson. Dig you later, boy.

Qu'est-Ce Que c'est? Dig you later?

Honey, don't you think
that's overdoing it a wee bit?

I hear you just finished
tearing off your latest masterpiece.

- Who's starring in it?
- Pamela Driscoll.

Oh, yes, Pamela Driscoll.
I can just see the play.

A well-dressed, brittle affair?

Not at all. My play is a character study
of a great actress, Sarah Bernhardt.

It deals with her early years,
so I call it The Young Sarah.

It takes a great actress
to play a great actress.

You're absolutely right, Millar.

Pardon me. Gloria, this is Mr. Barredout.

How do you do?

- Jacques darling.
- Hello, Pamela.

Hello, Ezra. Hello, Gloria.

Can you imagine me playing Sarah Bernhardt?

I'm working on it.


Jacques, I memorized the first scene.
I like to do it for you.

I got such ideas about the part.

For my entrance, I'm going to wear
a sumptuous black velvet suit.

Period, of course, you understand...

Pamela, remember,
it's not clothes that will make this part.

I know darling, I know.

Young Sarah must've sincerity
and sensitivity.

And she will.

Now Come on in the library
and let me read for you.

- I'll join you in a minute.
- Good. I'll get the script.

- You know what I like about you, Gloria?
- What?

You're free of the slavery of talent.
Your play.

Hello, there.


Hello, Jacques. How are you, boy?
Glad to see you.

I hope you had enough of this good clean fun.

Why don't we all go inside
and take a sleeping pill?

- Beg your pardon.
- I beg your pardon. My fault.

Not at all.

Eh, you promised
to play a little golf with me.

I feel just dire. I was hoping you forget it.

- Honey, do you mind?
- What?

- We're going to play a little golf.
- Not at all. I'll go shower and change...

and meet you on the ninth green in an hour.

- Fine.
- Ok.

I'll be waiting. Come on.

- You can come along, Gloria.
- You going to teach me to play golf?

If you're good, you can wear a sumptuous
black gown and play the best part: Caddy.

Oh, caddy, that's cute.

Here it is. I was looking for it.

Yes, I found it right here
in the middle of the floor.

Pamela must've left it.
She was a trifle upset.

Yes, I noticed something was wrong.

Is she going to be in it?

- What part is she going to play?
- Sarah.

- Sarah?
- I know just what you're going to tell me.

She's a dreadful choice for the part.

It's unanimous.

I just finished telling her myself.

- Well, then why is she going to be in it?
- I promised it to her, unfortunately.

I can't understand
an author like you doing such a thing.

Here you take what might be
a great piece of theater and deliberately...

ruin it by giving it to someone
you know isn't right for the part at all.

I know it's none of my business,
and I'm very sorry for...

Oh, no, please.
I'm very upset about all this.

I like to discuss it more with you.

I love to.

And maybe I could, sometime,
but I got to go meet my husband...

They won't be at the ninth green
for at least a half hour.

Please come and sit down.

Go ahead, Eh.

I don't know why playing caddy
is the best part.

I never get to hit the ball.

Stop complaining. Neither do I.

- Nice try.
- All right. That's good.

Well, I'm sorry, putt it out.

Putt it out?

Why not? It's the philosophy of the game.

It's a kick away. You're not going to make
me putt that?

What's the matter? Jangled nerves?
Let's see you do it. It's simple.

I'm giving this fellow
three strokes a hole handicap...

and he's making me putt one-inch putts.
Look out, will you? Step back.

Oh, well.

Nice try. You better stick to your dancing.

- Putt it out.
- Oh, now look...

- Come on.
- All right.

Let's go back to the house.

No, Dinah's going to meet us.
She'll be here any minute.

That is the end of Act Two.

Oh, it's thrilling. Perfectly thrilling.

I'm convinced that you must wait until
you have the right actress for the part.

Yes. But who?

Well, I don't know offhand.

Certainly, you must've someone in mind.




That's the most wonderful thing
that anyone has ever said to me.

To think...

Look at the rain on the fields.

Every living thing is
lifting its thirsty face.

She said she meet me here.

Be reasonable, Josh. Love will find a way.

I'm soaking wet. It's raining.

Nonsense. Just a few million
scattered drops that got together.

Wait till I get my hands on her.

- Why wait? Let's go now.
- Let's go.

Well, it's about time.

- Ok.
- Come on.

Last one in is a rotten egg.

Dinah, I am not going to do the play
with anyone else but you.

You're mad.

But haven't you ever felt the need
to prove yourself...

to lift yourself to heights no one
ever dreamed you were capable of?

It's out of the question.
I'm perfectly contented.

And besides, I love my husband
and I love working with him...

and a step like this would mean
the breaking up of our career together.

Of course. The whole idea was stupid.

We won't speak of it again. Ever.

Do you think
I really could play Sarah Bernhardt?

I knew it.

- You do want to do this.
- Oh, no.

Dinah, I'll wait a year,
until your show closes.

Just say you'll do it.

No. I'm fine for musical comedy.

That's what I'm suited for...

but no one would believe me
in a serious part.

Of course they would.

I think you're going to have
a quick chance to prove it. Look.

That's my husband.

- And it's raining. What will I do?
- Act.

Act? No. I'll hide.
That's what I'll do. How's this?

- That's much too obvious.
- What will I do?

- Improvise.
- Improvise? I'm terribly faint.

I feel sick.

Oh, I feel terribly sick.

You look terribly healthy.

I do? That's no good.
I'll take my makeup off.

You better hurry, whatever you do.
They're coming.

Oh, no. Say, now you got to hide.

Well, good luck, Camille.


Don't you wave at me. What's the idea
of standing me up in a hurricane?

Josh. I thought you never get here.

- Never get here? What...
- Take it easy, Josh.

- I think she might really be sick.
- Sick? What's the matter darling?

Oh, it's nothing.

- It's just that I been terribly faint.
- Ezra, get something.

- What?
- Get something. Brandy.

Darling, what happened?

I don't know.
I was coming down to meet you...

and suddenly I felt very strange.

Everything started to go round and round.

I came in here to rest for a minute...

and I must've fainted.

I'll never forgive myself
for thinking what I did.

Oh, Josh, you sound so far away.

I'm right here darling. I'm right here.

I felt so cold and suddenly so hot...

and dizzy.

Josh, I never felt like this ever before.

You never felt like this before?

Sweet, honey, baby, you mean...
It's wonderful.

- What?
- Eh.

No, it's not that. Definitely.

It's just that I had too much tennis
or too much sun or...

I want to go home.

- We will go home. Just...
- Here, take a sip of this.

- No, I'm too weak.
- It's cognac.

- It's brandy.
- I'm too weak.

Maybe we better get Shirlene ready
for tomorrow night.

Oh, no. I'll be all right.

- Help me, Josh.
- You're all right now.

We'll go home and everything will be fine.

All you have to do is just leave it to me.

Sarah, flustered,
steals last look at her book and gets up.

The judges:
'What will you recite, Mademoiselle?'

Sarah, nervously:
'The potion scene from Romeo and Juliet. '

She pauses. Judge: 'Very well, begin.'

- Hello, honey.
- Hello darling.

- Miss me?
- Well, of course.

You almost been gone a half an hour.

What happened, no rehearsal with Shirlene?

I called it off. We're having
pictures taken for Look magazine today.

Oh, my dear, I forgot all about it.
I must change.

That's just the way they want to see you.
The beautiful Mrs. Barkley at home.

Come on, a little service, please?
You're slipping.

I'm terribly sorry. I have the lighter
in my pocket, but I can't...

Well, all you have to do
is take this pillow off...

- Now, Josh, now...
- Hold it. Don't move. That's perfect.

What did I tell you? Is this going
to be a picture story or isn't it?

- Hello, Larry.
- This is Mr. Perkins...

Mr. Clarke, Mr. Leggett,
and Mr. Taylor of Look magazine.

Nice to see you.
Darling, he just wanted my opinion.

Perkins, it's your show. Take over.

We like to get the whole day.
You know, maybe...

Starting with breakfast.
We have it all set up on the terrace.

Just come along. Follow me. Darling, Come on.

I got orange juice.

Good light too, I think, don't you?

Your dying scene in the country
equaled Bernhardt's in Camille.

Read Act Three. I'll be waiting.

- Darling, will you please come...
- Dying scene in the country?

Oh, I see.

Well, we have everything picked
for the pictures.

Well, my poor sick little bride.
Let me help you.

Looks like one of the best setups we had.

Well, that was a performance.

It had me fooled completely.

Josh, not now. Sit down darling.

What's going on between you two?

Please hold on before we say
something we'll be sorry for later.

- All ready for the picture?
- Yes.

Lovely couple
cooing over the breakfast table.

Shut up. He's been after you, hasn't he?

I wouldn't be surprised
if he asked you to play Sarah Bernhardt.

- Could we get the picture, please?
- By all means.

Pick up the coffee cup.
You know, like you're having breakfast?

Yes. I'm terribly...

Now, smile, kiddies, smile. That's it.

He's a pretty smooth article.
Knew just how to work on you.

What are you talking about?

You don't think he let you
play Sarah Bernhardt, do you?

- Even you couldn't be that dumb.
- Well, now...

Would you feed him a strawberry?

A strawberry. Certainly.

He says he won't even do the show
unless I play the part.

Hold it.

- He thinks I'm a great actress.
- Don't make me laugh.

That's fine.
Now can we go in the living room?

Yes. Please go ahead and help yourself,
and we'll be right in...

in just a moment.

He believes in me.

He gives me confidence in myself.

All you ever done is tear me down,
make me feel like a nobody.

Your little sidekick.

Can't even walk across the stage without you.

- Can't even make a gesture.
- Correct.

- Big fat Svengali.
- You're darn tooting.

Well, I had enough.

That goes double.

I'm sick and tired of your lies,
your deceits, your tricks.

You're nothing
but an inconsiderate, selfish...

What are you doing here?

We were waiting to rehearse,
so I brought Shirlene along.

Shirlene, there's a girl with talent.

She knows your part
better than you do right now.

I could put her on tonight
and she be a sensation.

- Gee, thanks.
- Shut up.

Simmer down, take it easy.

That's all right. Happens all the time.

All calmed down, Dinah?
Now, why don't we get...

Why don't you take a picture of me
walking out of the house for good?

Dinah. Josh, do something. Stop her.

- This time I think she means it.
- So do I.

As for Shirlene, you have
my permission to put her on tonight...

because I won't be there.

What am I going to do?

We got this picture spread
set up for Look magazine.

What am I going to tell them?

Tell them you can fill in with eight pages
of an appendix operation in color.

♪ When I got shoes with wings on. ♪

♪ The winter's gone, the spring's on. ♪

♪ When I got shoes with wings on. ♪

♪ The town's full of rhythm ♪
♪ and the world's in rhyme. ♪

♪ The neon city glows up. ♪

♪ My pretty, pretty shows up. ♪

♪ We'll dance until they close up. ♪

♪ I got my guardian angel ♪
♪ working overtime ♪

♪ I give Aladdin the lamp, Midas the gold. ♪

♪ Who needs a wizard or magician. ♪

♪ In the old tradition? ♪

♪ That's not competition ♪

♪ I got them beat a thousand fold. ♪

♪ Why? ♪

♪ Because I got shoes with wings on. ♪

♪ And living has no strings on. ♪

♪ I put those magic things on. ♪

♪ And I go flying with them. ♪

♪ And the town is full of rhythm. ♪

♪ And the world in rhyme. ♪

We'll do the entire scene again.
Better take it from your entrance, Dinah.

From my entrance.

- Dinah darling.
- Yes?

I should think that after two weeks, you
would try to do this without the script.

Well, I know it.
It's just that I like to hold on to it.

You mustn't get to rely on it.
You won't have it with you opening night.

All right. Here we go.

Excuse me a minute, Jacques.

What do you mean by snooping around here?

Hiya, Dinah.

If you're here for news of the enemy camp,
I like to say that I'm happy.

I love the play, and I think that...
You may tell Josh in particular...

I think Jacques is the best director
I have ever worked with.

That's a beautiful suit...

If you're here to play Cupid,
you can put away your arrows.

It won't do you any good.

Listen, you and I never had a fight,

I'm sorry. You can't barge in,
in the middle of a rehearsal.

I'm trying to concentrate and...
All right. What is it?

I came to ask you about doing
that big benefit at Symphony Hall.

You know, the one we do every year
for the hospital.

No, not this year.

If you think you can get Josh and me
on the stage together, you're crazy.

- Dinah.
- I'll be right there in a second.

I like to see one of the Barkleys
represented. Josh won't be there.

He turned it down. He said he's
too busy, he has a big party that night.

Isn't that just like him?
Too busy to do a benefit.

Has to go to a party.

- You can count on me, Ezra, I'll be there.
- Dinah.

Bye. Yes, Jacques, I'm terribly sorry.

You're not superstitious
about one on a match, are you?

If you think you can get Dinah and me
to perform at that benefit together...

you're just crazy.

I like one of the Barkleys there.
Dinah can't make it.

Why not?

She's got a rehearsal that night.

Now, isn't that just like her?

All wrapped up in that big dramatic career.

Can't take a half hour off to do
one number for a worthy cause.

You can count on me, Eh, I'll be there.

Good. I'll see you at dinner.

- Wait a minute.
- Yeah, what's the matter?

You saw her today?

Yeap, I saw her.

- Where?
- At her rehearsal.

How is the great tragic actress
getting along?

Ok. She appeared a little nervous.

Seemed to flounder around, unsure of herself.

You know something?

She's going to take a header
right on her face.

And you know something else?
I'm going to let her lie there.

That's the spirit.
Who says the age of chivalry is dead?

Joshie, I'm all ready, honey.

Shirlene, you better run along.

I got some business before the show tonight.

I'm sorry.

- Well, I'll see you back here then?
- Yeah.

I'll be awful lonely.

You'll get over it.

You know,
I find that girl completely resistible.

All right, we'll take it again
from the same spot. Places, please.

All right, go.

Mother, I...

No, Dinah. I'm afraid you're forgetting
all the action we set for this.

You come in, pause for three counts
in the doorway...

look at your mother,
look at the Duke de Morny...

look at your aunt, walk to the window...

say the first half of your line,
turn and finish it.

You got it written down. You must remember.

I do remember it.
It's the scene I worked on last night.

Mother, I made up my...

No darling, you just look at your mother.

That's right. I'm sorry.

- Mother, I made up my mind...
- No. Well, all right.

Just say your first line, and we'll
work on it in more detail tomorrow.

- From here?
- From there.

Mother, I made up my mind.
I'm not going to the conservatory...

But darling, your mother is right here.

She's not in the second balcony.
Speak to her in a more natural tone.

This is not a musical comedy.
It's a legitimate play.

Mother, I made up my mind.
I'm not going to go to...

I can't hear you at all now, Dinah,
so speak louder, please.

Mother, I made up my mind. I'm not...

That's too loud, isn't it?

I'm sorry.

I don't know what's the matter with me.

I'm behaving
as if I never been in a theater before.

You mustn't be panicky, dear.
It's a new field. You'll get over it.

Well, of course I'll get it.

Well, that's all for today, anyway.
Thank you.

Wait for your calls, everyone.

10 o'clock tomorrow for Miss Elston,
Miss Gage, Miss Wilder, Mr. Henderson.


Hey, you're late. This is Genevieve.

- How do you do?
- Hello.

Well, I just looked in
on the noble experiment.

How's it coming?

Not so good. Looks as if she's going
to make a complete fool of herself.

Well, that's what you wanted, isn't it?

Sure. She deserves it.

She certainly does.
She's no dramatic actress.

No? Listen, she can do anything, that girl.

- Yeah?
- She could be great in that part.


Barredout doesn't know how to direct her.

- He's sitting in the bar.
- What do I care?

Listen, Ezra,
he doesn't understand her at all.

He keeps tearing her down, confusing her.

When she thinks she's not
getting something right, she's no good.

You got to approach her
in a different way and...

Well, I know how to help her.

- But you want her to flop.
- Sure.

Besides, she wouldn't take
any suggestions from me.

- Good evening, Mr. Barkley.
- Hello, Helen.

Funny, I thought
Barredout was supposed to be good.

Good? Did you ever see him work?


this is much different from musical comedy.

It is a play, mais out. A legitimate play.

Say, that's a great imitation you do of him.

- It is?
- Pretty good.

It is?

- Is that yours or mine?
- Mine.

Want to split it?

Excuse me a minute, will you?


Hello, Dinah? This is Jacques.

Hello, Jacques. I'm so glad it's you.

I was very anxious to know
how you feel after today's rehearsals.

it's not going along much better, is it?

I don't know, I get out there
and I feel absolutely lost.

That is all my fault.

Don't be silly.

Yes, it is.
My direction is completely to blame.

Jacques, your voice sounds so odd.

Have you been drinking?

No, it must be a bad connection.

Now listen, Dinah, I want you to know that...

I was wrong in telling you
how different this is from musical comedy.

It is not different.

It's wonderful to hear you say that.

You're still a great performer
and a wonderful actress.

In that scene with your family...

where you make your entrance,
you must walk in slowly.

You see, you must remember
that the keynote to your attitude is...

defiance toward your mother.

Walking slowly. Defiant.

I resent her.

Why, of course, Jacques. That feels right.

And when the Duke comes toward you...

and offers you his hand...

you must pull away quickly.

You're very frightened.

Yes, Jacques, I see. I'm afraid of him.

Yes, I understand.
It's a matter of relationships.

It's not just a mechanical movement.

Jacques, let's start from the beginning
and go through the whole scene.

Now, when your mother says, Sarah...

The Duke de Morny has
secured an audition for you.

I don't want to be an actress.

You're to read for them next week.

- Well, Sarah...
- Why don't you leave the poor girl alone?

I'll wager Sarah has
never even seen an actress.

Oh, yes, I have.

It was at the convent last year.

A sick lady came there and the sisters said
she used to be beautiful...

but that she was going to die alone
and unloved because she led a bad life.

She was pale and coughing, and her
eyes were big dark holes in her face.

And you know who she was?

She was the star of the Comédie Française.

I won't be like that and you can't make me.

Dinah, that's wonderful. Wonderful.

It was? Darling, I'm so glad.

- Thank you.
- Yes.

Your timing, your inflections were
just what I wanted.

- I believed every word.
- Perfect.

The scene has come to life for the first

- You seen any of the rehearsals lately?
- Dinah's? No.

- I wonder how it's coming along.
- I don't know.

It couldn't be much worse
than it was when I saw it.

I forgot. I got to make a telephone call.

- Want another drink?
- No, thanks.

I'll have one. Would you like a drink?


Hello, Dinah, I just called you to tell you
again how wonderful you were today.

I can't believe it. It's a miracle.

Yes? In Scene Two?

But I can't sit there
through the whole speech.

Yes, Jacques. Well, you're a genius.

Thank you, my dear.
Well, that is about all for now.


while we are in rehearsal,
I wish you wouldn't be so demonstrative.

So what?

- Demonstrative.
- What do you mean?

Well, throwing your arms about my neck
and kissing me in front of the company...

is most embarrassing.

- We'll have none of that.
- Why, Jacques...

Discipline, you know.

Well, I'm sorry.

I hope it won't be too compromising if you
take me to the benefit on Sunday night.

Benefit? What benefit?

The hospital... I told you.

Yes, I'll take you.


Hey, what's the idea of telling me
Dinah's not coming to the benefit?

- Is she?
- You know darned well she is. But I'm not.

You cooked up this little plot, now eat it.

Well, what happened, Ezra?
Are they both going to be here?

Dinah's here. I saw her. But that
pigheaded mule, I don't know if he'll come.

Now presenting Ezra Millar playing...

Tchaikovsky's Piano Concerto Number One
in B Flat Minor.


What are you doing here?

What are you doing here? Ezra.

Why, the double-crosser.

Don't you think the gallant thing
would be for you to leave?

I'm not going to leave.

This is a benefit.

They're expecting a number from me out there.

Why don't you leave?
This is beneath you now, anyway.

I have never walked out
on a benefit in my life.

And I'll not walk out
on all these hospital people.

It's for them. It makes no difference
to me whether you're here or not.

I'll perform anyway.

Thank you. I'm touched.

The piano's touched
and Tchaikovsky's touched.

And now I have a surprise
which I'm sure will touch you.

In this corner,
one of the great stars of show business.

And in the same corner,
another great star of show business.

Who will brilliantly oppose each other
in one of their greatest numbers.

Josh and Dinah Barkley.

♪ The way you wear your hat. ♪

♪ The way you sip your tea. ♪

♪ The memory of all that. ♪

♪ No, no, they can't take
that away from me. ♪

♪ The way your smile just beams. ♪

♪ The way you sing off-key. ♪

♪ The way you haunt my dreams. ♪

♪ No, no ♪
♪ They can't take that away from me. ♪

♪ We may never, never meet again. ♪

♪ On the bumpy road to love. ♪

♪ Still I'll always, always keep. ♪

♪ The memory of. ♪

♪ The way you hold your knife. ♪

♪ The way we danced till three. ♪

♪ The way you changed my life. ♪

♪ No, no ♪
♪ They can't take that away from me. ♪

♪ No, they can't take that away. ♪

♪ From me. ♪


- Thank you very much, Josh and Dinah.
- Thank you.

- It was so nice seeing you together again.
- Thank you very much.

Thank you.

- Dinah, that was wonderful.
- It was fun, wasn't it?


can't we be civilized about this...

and maybe go someplace and talk things over?

There's nothing to talk over, Josh.

You're doing very well without me...

and I'm doing what I guess
I always wanted to do.

In the long run, we'll be much happier apart.

Don't you think so?

Do you?

Of course I do.

I can't believe you really mean that.

Look, Josh.

That wasn't just another squabble we had.

Our break-up wasn't
just a whim of the moment.

It's been coming for a long time.
It had to happen.

You been taking me for granted too long.

I have to stand on my own two feet,
as a person...

and as an actress.

Until I do,
I can't take time to think about...

us or anything connected with the future.

That's how it's got to be.

You really do mean it, don't you?

Yes, I do.

Thanks for the dance.

I knew this would do it.
I know how to handle those kids.

I'll bet they're in each other's arms
right now.

Good, Ezra.

Josh, where's Dinah?

She's right over there.

Well, if at first you don't succeed, give up.

- Hello, Eh.
- Hello, Josh.

- Hello, Genevieve.
- This is Henrietta.

Sorry. Helen, Scotch and plain water, please?

- Yes sir.
- Tonight's the night.

- For what?
- Dinah's show's opening.

Oh, that. Give me a cigarette.

Not interested?

- Barredout come in yet?
- What do you care?

Where have you been these past 10 days?

- I can't even get you on the phone.
- I'm taking a day course at City College.

Stop kidding, Josh. You look a wreck.

Well, I'm not. I feel fine.

- Here's to Dinah.
- To Dinah, right.

The honorable judges
of the Conservatoire Français.

Mademoiselles, you have each been coached...

in gesture and diction for this audition...

and you will all have an equal chance.

But only one will be chosen...

to join the ranks
of the Conservatoire Français.

You may each perform one selection.

When you finish, take your place over there.

Let us begin, please.

Mademoiselle Clementine Villard.

Don't be nervous, mademoiselle.
What will you recite?

Portia's speech from The Merchant of Venice.

The quality of mercy is not strained.

It droppeth, as the gentle rain from Heaven.

Upon the place beneath.

Hello, Joe. How's it going?

Terrific, so far. Looks like a hit.

And then is heard no more.

It is a tale told by an idiot,
full of sound and fury.

Signifying nothing.

Mademoiselle Sarah Bernhardt.

What will you recite, Mademoiselle?

The potion scene from Romeo and Juliet.

There's no need for you to be nervous.

I am not nervous, Monsieur Le Juge.

Very well, in that case you may begin.


God knows when we shall meet again.

I have a faint cold fear
thrills through my veins.

That almost freezes up the heat of life.

I'll call them back.

Forgive me, Monsieur.

These are words and gestures taught me
by my coach. I learned them like a parrot.

They have nothing to do with acting.

With your permission,
I like to recite something else.

Very well. Be quick about it.

I'll recite the Marseillaise.

Any child can recite that.
That's not acceptable. Let us go on.

Monsieur, you cannot deny
a loyal French citizen...

the right to stand in public...

and speak the words of our national anthem.


By unanimous consent,
this committee has chosen you...

for the Conservatoire Français.


Ladies and gentlemen,
I'm much too excited to say anything.

I can only hope
that this evening marks the beginning...

of a long association between myself...

and my beautiful, enchanting star,
whom I worship...

on and off the stage.

- Josh, did you see any of it?
- Last scene.

- She was pretty good, wasn't she?
- Pretty good? Great.

She sure was terrific.

What I can't get over
is that Barredout fellow.

- He should be in the movies.
- Wish he were.

He's dreamy.
They make such a handsome couple.

Marie, this is Mr. Barkley, her husband.

I thought you two were divorced.

- You were wonderful.
- See you later, Dinah.

- You were terrific darling.
- Thank you very much.

Thanks for coming back.
See you at Millie's later.

- Dinah, I'm so proud of you.
- Thank you, Jacques.

I feel like a tongue-tied schoolboy.

I really meant what I said before.
I do worship you.

I was hoping that tonight
you would give me some word, some sign.

Well, later, Jacques.

All right. This is your night.

- I'll wait for you at Floriano's darling.
- All right.

- Don't be too long.
- All right.

- Mrs. Barkley, you were wonderful.
- Thank you, Mary.

- Mary?
- Yes, ma'am?

- Are these all the telegrams?
- That's all there are.

- Did you ask the doorman?
- Yes, I did.

You did?

There he is.

He is handsome, isn't he?
Gee, she's a lucky girl.

Marie, why don't you go powder your nose?

I just did. Everyone in the powder room
was talking about him and her.

She thinks she's proved she doesn't need me.

Thinks? She has proved it. Drink up.

- And I helped her do it.
- You what?

When he got up on stage
to make his speech, I held my breath.

I thought for sure he was
going to announce their engagement.

Why don't you get your broomstick
and fly home?

I threw Dinah right into his arms.
What a sap.

If ever a fellow dug his own grave...

What are you talking about?
You were both to blame.

So you think it's over too?

I don't know, not necessarily.

You think she doesn't love me anymore.

- You think I lost her.
- I didn't say that.

- You think she loves Barredout.
- Well, what do you think?

I don't know, but I'm going to find out.

I love her, Eh. I got to know where I stand.

This night might be the end.

She's still at the theater.
Why don't you call her up?

I couldn't do that.

You got to face it and talk to her.
Otherwise it might be too late.

- No, I can't.
- Mr. Barredout.

Sure, I'll call her.

Good luck. Ten-to-one it's still you.

Yes, I agree with you.
I think she's going to be...

one of the greatest legitimate actresses
of our time.

There's no doubt.

Mary, you did double-check
all the cards from the flowers?

Yes, I did, Mrs. Barkley.

- And there wasn't anything?
- No, not a thing.

Hello. Just a minute, please.

Hello. Yes, Jacques.
What on earth do you want?

I'll be right over.

I just wanted to ask you
something frightfully important.

I hope you realize what you mean to me.

I don't mean anything to you, do I?

Why do you ask me these questions now?

We'll talk later.

But I must know this minute.

Do you still love your husband, or is it me?

But I can't possibly answer you
over the telephone.

Why not? What better way is there
to find out things, than on the phone?

- This is absurd.
- I'm sorry, dear.

I'll be with you in just a second.
I don't see how...


Just a minute.
Will you hold on just a second?

Jacques, come here.

They gone to Millie's,
so I thought I would...

I got to ask you something very important.

Jacques, you did telephone me
at the hotel during rehearsals, didn't you?

No. Why?

You didn't telephone me during rehearsals?

No. I knew you were resting.
I didn't want to bother you.

Will you wait outside for...
I'll get dressed now.

I'll get a cab.

- What's the matter with you?
- Nothing.

- Good. I'll be waiting.
- Yes.

Hello, Jacques.

Yeah? Yes?

I just took a minute to think things over...


And I'll answer you now.

I love you.

Only you.

I did think for a while that...

I might have some feeling left for Josh...

when I was faltering in rehearsals.

But when you started calling me
and showing me the way...

I realized that, compared to you...

he's a cheap, incompetent hack.

I love you darling.

You made me very happy.

Mary. Come on, help me find the key.

I got to find the key.
You know, the one I put away.

Now, Mrs. Barkley, if you'll...


390 River Terrace, please.

♪ All that I know is you ♪
♪ be hard to replace. ♪

♪ Where else in all the world. ♪

♪ Such loveliness and such grace? ♪

♪ The poet often chanted. ♪

♪ The love he found divine. ♪

♪ But never was he granted. ♪

♪ A lady-love like mine. ♪

♪ Deep down, deep down inside. ♪

♪ My secret heart knows. ♪

♪ The more that I'm with you. ♪

♪ The more and more my rapture grows. ♪

♪ Without you at ♪ ♪ my side I fear. ♪

♪ No future could I face. ♪

♪ For you be oh, so hard to. ♪

♪ Hard to, hard to, hard to. ♪

Dinah, what are you doing here?

Hello. I came to see you.

Well, this is a rare honor.

I would've thought
that you be out celebrating.

Well, don't worry.
I'm going to make you very happy.

I won't contest it.
You can have your divorce.

Thank you.

Divorce happens to suit my plans perfectly.

As a matter of fact, I'm expecting
a young lady here any minute.

So, if you don't mind...

- Shirley?
- Shirlene.

- Then you and she are really...
- We're mad about each other.

- Congratulations.
- Congratulations to you too.

I hope you'll find your new director
easier to get along with than I was.

I doubt that.



Don't you even want to shake hands?

Perhaps you should not be
quite so demonstrative...

throwing your arms around me and
kissing me in front of all of those people.

Discipline, you know. Discipline.

- Darling, your accent was amazingly good.
- Wait a minute.

Had me completely fooled until tonight...

when Jacques walked in
while you were on the phone.

Dinah, you know.

And you tortured me like this?

Just a little torture.

Why, you know
that I almost walked into the East River?

- I almost shot myself?
- No.

- I almost jumped off that roof?
- My poor darling.

- You might have almost killed yourself.
- I know.

I love you so.

- It mustn't happen again darling.
- No.

We mean much too much to each other.

You're such a wonderful girl.
And such a talented actress.

Your performance was magnificent.

You are great.

I have an idea for a play.

- I don't want to do another play.
- No more dramas?

- No biography.
- No messages?

No worrying about the plot.

- No?
- No.

Then we'll have nothing but
fun set to music, we'll have the tempo.

You know, that good old tempo.

♪ Just give me that Manhattan downbeat. ♪

♪ That beats a tempo of its own ♪

♪ You got to shout, This is it. ♪

♪ The day you visit. ♪

♪ The jumpenest town was ever known. ♪

♪ Keep your Paree and London town beat. ♪

♪ Pop Knickerbocker stands alone. ♪

♪ Drive up any a venue, ♪
♪ swing down any street. ♪

♪ There's no beat has ♪
♪ Manhattan downbeat beat. ♪

♪ Manhattan has a beat that's all its own. ♪

♪ Manhattan has a beat to call its own. ♪

♪ So, Mr. Leader, when you give ♪
♪ the band the downbeat. ♪

♪ A one, two, three. ♪

♪ And give them that Manhattan downbeat. ♪

♪ That beats a tempo of its own ♪

♪ You got to shout, This is it. ♪

♪ The day you visit. ♪

♪ The jumpenest town was ever. ♪

♪ Was ever known. ♪

♪ Keep your Paree and London town beat. ♪

♪ Pop Knickerbocker stands alone. ♪

♪ - Drive up any a venue. ♪
♪ - Swing down any street. ♪

♪ No beat has Manhattan downbeat. ♪

♪ No beat has Manhattan downbeat. ♪

♪ No beat has Manhattan downbeat beat ♪