The Amorous Adventures of Moll Flanders (1965) - full transcript

WELCOME,
YOUR LORDSHIP.

WELCOME,
YOUR WORSHIP.

GOD SAVE THE QUEEN.

MARY TWIGG--

BOTH PARENTS
DIED OF THE FEVER.

DO YOU KNOW YOUR
CATECHISM, CHILD?

YES,
MY LORD BISHOP.

GOOD. GOOD.

AND WHAT DO YOU
WANT TO BE WHEN
YOU GROW UP?

A DAIRYMAID,
SIR.

ELIZABETH WILLIAMS--



THE, UH, MOTHER
DROWNED HERSELF,

FATHER UNKNOWN.

WHO WERE THE SONS
OF NOAH, CHILD?

SHEM, HAM, AND--
[SNIFFLES]--JAPHETH.

GOOD GIRL.

MOLL FLANDERS--

FOUND ABANDONED
BY THE GYPSIES.

RECITE FOR ME,
CHILD, A PASSAGE
FROM THE SCRIPTURES.

"I AM MY BELOVED'S, AND
HIS DESIRE IS TOWARD ME.

"COME, MY BELOVED,
LET US GO FORTH

INTO THE FIELDS--"

YES, YES,
YES, YES. AHEM.

AND WHAT DO YOU
WANT TO BE WHEN
YOU GROW UP?

A GENTLEWOMAN, SIR.



A GENTLE--

HA HA HA.

HA HA HA.

A GENTLEWOMAN, INDEED.

HA HA HA!

AND WHO'S TO SAY
SHE WON'T BE...
WITH THOSE EYES?

THERE, THERE.

AND LATER ON BRING ME
THOSE FLOWERS I CHOSE.

RIGHT, SIR.

I WANT THYME, FENNEL,
SAGE, AND BLACKCURRANT.

THEY DO SHOOT UP,
SIR, DON'T THEY?

DAMN IT, THEY DO.
IT SEEMS BUT YESTERDAY

I BROUGHT HER
TO THE HOUSE AN ORPHAN,

AN INNOCENT CHILD.

THEY DON'T STAY
THAT WAY LONG.

NO, THEY DON'T--

BACK TO THE BLACKCURRANTS!
THE BLACKCURRANTS.

MY YEARS IN THIS HOUSE
WERE EXCEEDINGLY HAPPY.

ALTHOUGH ONLY A SERVANT,

I WAS TREATED AS
ONE OF THE FAMILY,

AND, LIKE
ITS OTHER MEMBERS,
I'VE BEEN ENCOURAGED

TO FOLLOW MY STUDIES

AND KEEP MYSELF
SPOTLESSLY TIDY...TOO.

IN OTHER WORDS,

MY EDUCATION WAS
IN NO WAY NEGLECTED.

OH, SIR, WHAT
A FRIGHT YOU GAVE ME.

OH, SIR.
OH, NO, SIR.

OH, SIR, WHAT
WILL YOUR FATHER SAY?

I WAS TREATED AS
ONE OF THE FAMILY,

AND I ENJOYED
ALL THE ADVANTAGES
OF A WIDE EDUCATION--

MUSIC...

MUSIC.

♪ WHEN THE COCK
BEGINS TO CROW ♪

♪ WHEN THE COCK
BEGINS TO CROW ♪

♪ WHEN THE COCK
BEGINS TO CROW ♪

♪ WHEN THE COCK
BEGINS TO CROW ♪

♪ WHEN THE COCK
BEGINS TO CROW ♪

♪ WHEN THE COCK
BEGINS TO CROW ♪

♪ COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO ♪

♪ COCK-A-DOODLE-- ♪♪

NO, NO, NO, NO!

MOLL, YOU TAKE
MY SISTER'S PART.

SHE'S VILELY
OUT OF VOICE.

I'M NOT
OUT OF VOICE!

'TIS YOU
OUT OF TUNE!

MOLL'S VOICE
OUT OF TUNE IS
SWEETER THAN YOURS IN.

AYE. AND
HER BREATH, TOO.

♪ COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO ♪

♪ COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO ♪

SAMUEL!

OH, I'M SORRY.

MASTER ROBIN,
YOU'RE COMING IN LATE,

AND, MISS LAURA,
YOUR TIME IS TOO QUICK.

♪ COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO ♪

♪ COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO ♪

♪ WHEN THE AMBER
LEAVES BLOW ♪

♪ AND THE OWL
CRIES... ♪

IN ADDITION TO MUSIC,

WE HAD LESSONS IN
DEPORTMENT, MANNERS--

♪ OHH--OH! ♪♪

MANNERS. AND
I SOON PICKED UP

THE WAYS OF LADIES
AND OF GENTLEMEN.

[HORSE NEIGHS]

SHOO! SHOO!

THE, UH...

THE SPECKLED HEN
WON'T LAY IN THE BOXES.

MOLL, YOU KNOW
I'D MARRY YOU.

MARRY ME, SIR?

TELL ME A MAN
WHO WOULDN'T.

IF THE WAY OF THE WORLD

WASN'T FIRST TO
SEEK FOR A FORTUNE--

'TIS NOT A FORTUNE
I LACK, SIR.

I'VE NOT TWO GUINEAS
TO RUB TOGETHER.

OH, MOLL.

I'LL--I'LL GIVE YOU
MORE GOLD THAN
YOU'VE EVER SEEN.

FOR WHAT, SIR?

I HAVE MY WAGES.

I'LL MARRY YOU, MOLL.

TRULY, I WILL.

IN A CHURCH.

A CHURCH?

BEFORE THE PARSON,

IN A LOVELY WHITE DRESS.

WHITE DRESS?

AND PRAYERS.

OH.

OH!

AH.

AND A RING,

AND A MARRIAGE
BED, MOLL.

MARRIAGE BED?

[HEN CLUCKS]

WHAT--WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN
DOING WITH M-M-MOLL, EH?

FOR A BOY BROUGHT UP
IN THE COUNTRY, YOU'RE
STRANGELY IGNORANT.

WHY, YOU...

AAH!

MOLL, COME HERE.

AAH!

[PIGS SQUEAL]

WHAT'S GOT INTO
THOSE PIGS?

YOUR...SONS, SIR.

HA! HA HA HA!

FIGHTING OVER SOME
WENCH, I'LL WAGER.

DO I KNOW HER?

OHH!

IN THE BARN, EH?

I WAS LOOKING
FOR EGGS, SIR.

FIND ANY?

NO, SIR.

SHALL YOU AND I GO
AND HAVE ANOTHER LOOK?

SAMUEL!

SAMUEL, WHAT
ARE YOU AFTER?

A BIRD, MY DEAR.
AFTER A BIRD.

[GUNSHOT]

AAH!

SILLY OLD COW.

OH, MY POOR DEAR.

HERE.

YOU SEE, MOLL,
I HAVEN'T FORGOTTEN.

OH, SIR.

I SPENT WHOLE HOURS
LOOKING AT THE GOLD

HE HAD GIVEN ME.

I COUNTED HIS COINS
A HUNDRED TIMES A DAY.

RUIN WAS AT MY DOOR.

BUT I THINK I
NOW RATHER WISHED
FOR THAT RUIN

THAN STUDIED
HOW TO AVOID IT.

GOODBYE, BROTHER.

GOODBYE, DEAR.

SIR.

HOW LONG
WILL YOU BE GONE?

A WEEK. OR A MONTH

IF THE PLEASURES OF TOWN
ARE DIVERTING.

OH.

AW...

THERE NOW, MOLL.

[FLUTE PLAYS]

WHAT DO YOU SEE?

SOMETHING IN THE WATER.

A CORPSE?

I'VE KNOWN GOOD PICKINGS
OFF DROWNED MEN.

A LASS,
BY HER LONG HAIR.

UNLESS IT'S
SOME FOOL GENTLEMAN
BATHING IN HIS WIG.

IS THAT A SHEEP
OR A PILE OF CLOTHES?

LET'S HOPE IT'S A MAN

AND HE'S BROUGHT
HIS WATCH AND PURSE.

COME ON.

HELP YOURSELF, SQUINT.

NO, NOT A FARTHING.

THERE'S A BIT OF LACE
HERE, THOUGH.

I SEE YOU!

VILLAINS!

OHH, I SEE YOU!

WRETCHES!

HELP!

HELP!

HELP!

OOH, YOU!

VILLAINS!

M-M-M-MISS FLANDERS.

I WANTED
FOR A LONG TIME

TO GET YOU...
ON YOUR OWN.

I'D LIKE VERY MUCH TO--

OOH!

LIKE VERY MUCH
TO TALK TO YOU,
IF I MAY, PLEASE.

M-M-M-MISS FLANDERS,

I-I-I'VE NEVER
CALLED YOU M-M-MOLL

AS THE OTHERS HAVE DONE,

BECAUSE, IN BRIEF,
I'VE, WELL,

I'VE NEVER TREATED YOU
AS A SERVANT
IN THIS HOUSEHOLD,

BECAUSE, IN SHORT,

YOU'VE ALWAYS
SEEMED TO ME TO BE
MORE OF AN EQUAL

A-A-AND, IN MANY CASES,

A...A SUP--
A SUPERIOR.

I--I--I HAVE MOVED,
AS YOU KNOW--

I HAVE MOVED, AS YOU KNOW,
IN OUR OWN LOCAL SOCIETY--

IN OUR LOCAL SOCIETY,

AND I'VE NEVER
FOUND A YOUNG WOMAN
TO COMPARE WITH YOU

FOR YOUR--YOUR LOOKS,

YOUR GOOD HUMOR,
OR YOUR WIT.

IN-N-N-N BRIEF,
M-M-MISS FLANDERS,

I'D LIKE VERY MUCH
M-M-M-MARRY YOU.

MARRY? ME?

MARRY MOLL?

NO! OHH!

AND WHAT, PRAY,
IS WRONG WITH MOLL?

SHE'S AS
GENTEEL AS ANY OF
OUR ACQUAINTANCES!

GENTEEL? SHE WAS
DRAGGED UP BY GYPSIES.

AND WHAT'S MORE,
SHE'S A BASTARD!

YES, AND SHE'S
A JUMPED-UP SERVANT GIRL!

BRED IN A POORHOUSE!

AT LEAST SOMEONE'S
ASKED FOR HER,

WHICH IS MORE THAN
ANYONE'S DONE FOR YOU!

OHH!

OHH!

QUIET DOWN! QUIET!

YOU, TOO!

AAH!

QUIET, ALL OF YOU!

HAVE SOME RESPECT

FOR YOUR OWN FLESH
AND BLOOD!

I DO, SIR!

BY FINDING A WIFE WHO'LL
PUT SOME GOOD LOOKS
INTO THIS FAMILY!

[COUGHING]

MOLL?

I MUST TALK WITH YOU.

PLEASE TELL ME--
TELL ME WHAT TO DO,

WHAT TO SAY.

SAY TO WHO?

HIM. HE. HE'S ASKED ME
TO MARRY HIM.

WHO? WHO?

HE. YOUR BROTHER.

AND HE'S TOLD
THE WHOLE FAMILY.

OH, THEY'LL
MURDER ME FOR SURE.

HA HA HA HA HA!

HE'S A GOOD ENOUGH FELLOW
AND WELL-PROVIDED.

OR DO YOU LOOK HIGHER?

HOW CAN I BE A WIFE
TO ONE BROTHER AND A...

A MISTRESS
TO THE OTHER?

MMM, IF YOU ARE ANXIOUS
ON THAT SCORE, MOLL,

I HAVE NO CLAIMS ON YOU.

NOTHING WOULD
MAKE ME HAPPIER

THAN TO REGARD YOU
AS A SISTER.

IF YOU DON'T MARRY HIM,

THEY'LL KICK YOU
OUT OF THE HOUSE.

AND WHAT WILL
YOUR PROSPECTS BE THEN,

A GIRL WHO'S
LOST HER REPUTATION?

WHO TOOK IT FROM ME?

AND...

YOU MAY BE WITH CHILD
FOR ALL WE KNOW.

YES, YOUR BEST COURSE
IS TO MARRY MY BROTHER,

JUST AS SOON AS YOU CAN
GET HIM TO THE CHURCH.

HIS WORDS HAD PUT
IDEAS INTO MY HEAD,

AND I FANCIED MYSELF
WITH CHILD.

A FEAR THAT LUCKILY
PROVED FALSE.

BUT BY THEN,

TAKING THE ADVICE OF
THE MAN WHOM I STILL LOVED,

I'D SAID...

I WILL.

WHO GIVETH THIS WOMAN

TO BE MARRIED
TO THIS MAN?

MODESTY FORBIDS ME
TO REVEAL THE...

SECRETS
OF THE MARRIAGE BED.

[SNORING]

[SNORING]

NEVER, LADIES,
NEVER MARRY A FOOL.

ANY HUSBAND RATHER
THAN A FOOL.

OHH! OH, YOU!

WHETHER A MAD FOOL
OR A SOBER FOOL,

TAKE ANYTHING
BUT A FOOL.

HA HA HA HA!

YAA-HAA!

YAA!

HYAH!

AND THIS ONE
CAME TO A FOOL'S END.

I THANK YOU, VICAR.

MY DEAR.

DON'T CRY,
MOTHER. PLEASE.

THE FAMILY, OF COURSE,

MADE SURE I GOT NOTHING
BY HIS WILL.

AND SO,
NEXT MORNING EARLY,

I LEFT THE HOUSE

TO MAKE MY WAY
IN THE WORLD.

AND NOW I WAS FACED BY
THE WORST OF DEVILS--
POVERTY.

A GIRL CAN BE
KEPT BY A MAN

OR SHE CAN
KEEP HERSELF,

BUT MAKE NO MISTAKE,

EVEN WHEN INDEPENDENT,

SHE IS STILL
LOOKING FOR A KEEPER.

AND, I CONFESS,

I WAS NOT SUITABLY
AFFECTED BY THE LOSS
OF MY HUSBAND.

THOUGH A WIDOW,

I FELT I SHOULD SOON BE
A WIDOW CONSOLED.

GOOD DAY, MA'AM.

IS THERE ANYTHING
I CAN DO TO HELP YOU?

I, UH...I'VE COME
ABOUT THE POSITION.

OH, WELL, MISS GLOWBER'S
IN THE FITTING ROOM.

BELLA, BELLISSIMA!

YOU DON'T NEED TO BE
A SEAMSTRESS, CHILD.

WITH THOSE LEGS,
YOU CAN CLIMB HIGHER
THAN NEEDLEWORK.

I HAVE NO
EXPERIENCE, SIR,

OF ANYTHING
BUT HOUSEHOLD DUTIES.

AH, QUELLE CHANCE.

MY WIFE IS LOOKING
FOR A LADY'S MAID.

LADY'S MAID, INDEED. HA!

LADY BLYSTONE
SHOULD WAIT FOR MAIDS

UNTIL SHE CAN
PAY HER BILLS.

THIS ONE, SIR,
HAS BEEN DUE TWO MONTHS!

MY WIFE WILL
SEND YOU THE MONEY

AS SOON AS
WE GET TO LONDON.

I THINK, SIR,
SHE IS NOT YOUR WIFE.

I KNOW HER FOR THE DUKE
OF ILCHESTER'S DAUGHTER,

FROM A STRONG
FAMILY RESEMBLANCE
IN NOT PAYING DEBTS.

OH, PER FAVORE,
PLEASE.

SOME PEOPLE COME TO
THE COUNTRY FOR CREDIT

WHEN THEY CAN NO LONGER
OBTAIN IT IN TOWN.

SEND IT TO MY BANKERS.

IF YOU HAVE BANKERS,

PERHAPS YOU WILL BE
GOOD ENOUGH TO SIGN IT
AND ADDRESS IT.

I UNDERSTAND,
LADY BLYSTONE,

YOU'RE IN NEED
OF A MAID.

IN NEED, MY DEAR,
I CERTAINLY AM,

BUT I'M ALSO IN
NEED OF THE FUNDS
TO PAY ONE.

I WOULD COME TO YOU
FOR NOTHING,
JUST FOR MY KEEP.

YOU'RE A WIDOW,
MY DEAR?

YES.

OH, YOU HAVE MY SYMPATHY.

THANK YOU,
BUT IT'S OUT OF PLACE.

MY HUSBAND WAS A FOOL.

I CANNOT CLAIM IT
WAS ANY GREAT LOSS.

YOU SEE,

IT'S NOT WAGES I WANT
BUT OPPORTUNITY.

AND WHAT OPPORTUNITY
DO YOU EXPECT IN LONDON?

THE CHANCE OF
ANOTHER HUSBAND.

AND HOW DO YOU THINK
OUR CITY MEN ARE DIFFERENT

FROM YOUR RUSTIC VARIETY?

I DO NOT THINK
THEY ARE DIFFERENT,

BUT THERE'S
A WIDER CHOICE, MILADY.

OF THE CLOTH AND COLOR
OF THEIR CLOTHES PERHAPS,

BUT NOT WHAT'S INSIDE.

COULD YOU
TELL THE DIFFERENCE

BETWEEN A COUNTRY CLOD
AND A COURTIER IN THE DARK?

BUT I'D SOONER
MARRY THE COURTIER,
WOULDN'T YOU?

AH, MARRIAGE,
YES, THERE I AGREE.

THE CLOTH COUNTS MORE
THAN WHAT IT CONTAINS.

YOU KNOW,
YOU PLEASE ME, CHILD.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO
GO ON BEFORE ME

AND TAKE MY BAGGAGE
TO LONDON?

OH, MILADY.

DARLING,
I HAVE GOOD NEWS.

WE HAVE A NEW MAID.

OH, BELLA,
BELLISSIMA.

I SAID MAID.

BUT, DARLING...

R-O-T-H.

H? H.

ROTHCHILD.

I WAS RESOLVED NOW
TO BE MARRIED OR NOTHING

AND TO BE WELL-MARRIED
OR NOT AT ALL.

I NOW HAD
THE FIRST ESSENTIAL

FOR A WOMAN WHO
SEEKS A HUSBAND--
A GOOD WARDROBE.

IT WASN'T MINE,
OF COURSE,

BUT I'D BORROWED
SKILLFULLY.

ALREADY IT SEEMED TO BE
HAVING AN EFFECT.

WARMER
THAN YESTERDAY.

I BEG YOUR PARDON, SIR?

I SAY IT'S WARMER
THAN YESTERDAY.

INDEED, SIR?

IN MY ESTIMATION,
'TIS SOMEWHAT COOLER.

WELL, I'LL NOT DISPUTE
THE TEMPERATURE, MA'AM,

IF YOU'LL PERMIT ME
TO OPEN THE WINDOW.

I DO HOPE
WE'LL DISPUTE
NOTHING, SIR.

WE'VE A LONG WAY
TO GO.

LONDON?

MMM.

HAVE YOU
BEEN THERE BEFORE?

NO. NEVER.

I HOPE YOU HAVE
GOOD FRIENDS THERE, MA'AM.

'TIS A CITY FULL
OF SNARES AND PITFALLS
FOR THE UNWARY.

I THINK, SIR, I SHALL
SOON MAKE FRIENDS.

ATTEND TO
THEIR QUALITY, MA'AM.

I RESPECT
YOUR ADVICE, SIR.

ARE YOU GOING
TO LONDON, SIR?

YES. I'VE BEEN ON
BUSINESS TO PLYMOUTH,

A CITY, I REGRET TO SAY,
OVERPOPULATED WITH
NONCONFORMISTS.

MAY I ASK, SIR,

THE NATURE
OF YOUR BUSINESS?

I'M A BANKER, MA'AM.

MMM.

MMM.

[CHUCKLING]

DEVILISH AMUSING,
SOME OF THESE BISHOPS.

AH...

I SEE I HAD
NO NEED TO FEAR

THAT YOU WOULD GO
UNPROTECTED IN LONDON.

YOU WEAR A RING, MA'AM.
YOU HAVE A HUSBAND.

UNFORTUNATELY, SIR...

I'M A WIDOW.

'TIS A DROLL CHANCE
THAT BRINGS US TOGETHER.

HAPPILY, MA'AM--
UH, UNHAPPILY, UH,
I AM A WIDOWER.

OH.

GIVE ME THE POT OF JAM,
WILL YOU?

AAH!

[INSECTS BUZZING]

WHOA! WHOA!

GUARD?

SIR?

WHAT'S TOWARD?

THERE'S A DEAD MAN
ON THE ROAD, SIR.

KEEP YOUR EYES ABOUT YOU.
THAT'S AN OLD TRICK.

STAND FAST!

I'LL DROP THE FIRST MAN
THAT MOVES.

A HOLDUP! MY WATCH!

OH, THANK HEAVEN!

I'VE NAUGHT ELSE
BUT A HANDFUL OF GUINEAS.

AND YOU?

I STILL
HAVE MY HEAD, SIR.

IF YOU'LL CALM YOURSELF.

HAND ME THAT CUSHION
AND THEN LISTEN A MOMENT.

NO BRANDY, NO
CONSIGNMENTS OF CLOTH,

NO LACE,
NO BULLION?

NOT A THING, SIR, BUT
THE PASSENGERS' BAGGAGE.

I SWEAR IT, SIR.

LET ME SEE THE PASSENGERS.

SQUINT,
SEARCH THE COACH.

MAY YOU BURN
IN HELL, SIR, FOR
YOUR DAMNED IMPUDENCE.

AND MAY YOU
DIE A SLOW DEATH, SIR,

OF THE TEDIUM
IN HEAVEN.

MEANWHILE, YOUR PURSE.

A RING, SIR, PERHAPS?

YOU WOULD NOT
LIE TO ME, SIR, I HOPE?

ALL RIGHT, SIR.

WOULD YOU MIND
ALIGHTING, M'LADY?

I WANT TO
SEARCH THE COACH.

THOUGH YOU
ARE A SCOUNDREL,

I SEE YOU'RE
A MAN OF MANNERS.

THIS YOUNG LADY,

WHO'S TRAVELING
UNDER MY PROTECTION,

IS, IF YOU'LL
FORGIVE ME FOR SAYING SO,

WITH CHILD.

NINE MONTHS,
TWO WEEKS,
FOUR DAYS.

AND NO MIDWIFE
'TWIXT HERE
AND SALISBURY.

I ENVY YOUR HUSBAND
HIS CHILD.

ALAS, SIR,
I'M A WIDOW.

THEN YOU'VE LOST ENOUGH.
I'LL TAKE NO MORE.

GUARD, YOU CAN
MOVE THE CART.

MA'AM.

COURTESY, YOU APE!
ASSIST THE LADY.

AND YOU, SIR.

I'LL STARVE MYSELF
BUT NOT MY HORSES,

SO I'LL HAVE YOUR WIG.

AS I THOUGHT, SIR.
A CRAVAT PIN.

DRIVE ON, COACHMAN.
BY THE LOOK OF THINGS,

YOU'D BETTER MAKE
GOOD TIME TO SALISBURY.

RIGHT. GO ON. GET UP, BOY.

[WHISTLES]

COME ON, TOBY.

THAT'S THE BOY.
GOOD LAD.

WELL, WHAT
ARE WE WAITING FOR?

ALL RIGHT. WHAT HAVE
YOU GOT THERE?

FOUND IT UNDER
THE SEAT.

'TIS HERS.
I SAID WE'D SPARE HER.

YOU SPARE TOO MANY.

THAT'LL TEACH YOU
TO DISOBEY ORDERS.

"LADY BLYSTONE."

TITLED, TOO.

A WIDOW,
CHILD ON THE WAY,

WHY SHOULD A MAN
RISK HANGING, SQUINT,

WHEN THERE ARE WOMEN LIKE THAT
NEEDING COMFORT AND CARE...

AND A MAN TO SHOW THEM
HOW TO SPEND THEIR MONEY?

LONDON!

PLAYHOUSES! PALACES!

GAY PROMENADES! MILLINERS!
DRESSMAKERS!

HATTERS! JEWELERS! HOSIERS!

HABERDASHERS! HAIRDRESSERS!
AND...HUSBANDS.

GET AWAY, YOU GOATS!

GO ON OFF!

BE OFF OVER THERE!

GO ON OFF IT!

WHOA THERE!

AH, HERE WE ARE.

A VERY AGREEABLE
JOURNEY, MA'AM.

YOU'LL WANT A PORTER, MISS?

HOW MUCH?

[SCREAMING]

ARE YOU SURE YOU WOULDN'T FEEL
SAFER IF I ACCOMPANIED YOU?

THANK YOU, SIR,
BUT I HAVE MY PORTERS.

I SHALL TAKE A CHAIR.

YOUR SERVANT, MA'AM.

CHAIR!

HERE, MADAM.

HEY, YOU.

HERE, FOLLOW THAT CHAIR.

MOVE OVER.

SIR! HOW DID YOU KNOW I--

IS HER LADYSHIP AT HOME?

BY SAINT BARTHOLOMEW,
YOU!

I CAME TO INQUIRE
AFTER MY OLD FRIEND
LADY BLYSTONE.

I'M STAYING WITH LADY BLYSTONE.

OH, I SEE.

SHE WILL NOT BE BACK
UNTIL TOMORROW.

INDEED.

THE HOUSE, I FEAR,
IS IN SOME DISORDER.

LADY BLYSTONE'S SERVANTS
SEEM TO HAVE GONE.

HER SERVANTS MAKE
A HABIT OF GOING,

AND FOR GOOD REASON.

BUT YOU ARE
NOT THEN STAYING
IN THIS HOUSE ALONE?

UH, FOR TONIGHT,
YES.

HMM. ONE CAN SEE THAT
YOU ARE NEW TO LONDON.

WHY?

ARE YOU NOT AWARE
OF THE DANGERS,

A WOMAN ALONE
IN THIS PART OF TOWN?

DANGERS?

HAVEN'T YOU HEARD
OF THE MOHOCKS,

GANGS OF YOUNG MEN WHO
TERRORIZE THE STREETS?

YOU SAW THEM
AT THE COACHING STATION.

THEY STOP AT NOTHING--
ROBBERY, ARSON, RAPE.

WHY, ONLY LAST WEEK,
IN THIS VERY STREET,

A GIRL OPENED HER DOOR
TO LET IN HER CAT,

AND YOU KNOW
WHAT THEY DID?

THEY SLIT OFF
HER NOSE WITH A RAZOR!

WHAT...WHAT
SHOULD I DO, SIR?

ALLOW ME
TO BE OF SERVICE.

I HAVE NO ENGAGEMENTS
THIS EVENING.

PERMIT ME TO STAY
AND KEEP YOU COMPANY.

WELL, I HARDLY THINK, SIR,
THAT WOULD BE SEEMLY.

WHAT DO YOU
TAKE ME FOR?

I AM AN ALDERMAN
OF THE CITY OF LONDON,

A PARISH COUNSELOR,
A MEMBER OF THE SOCIETY

FOR THE REFORMATION
OF MORALS.

DO YOU THINK
I CANNOT BE TRUSTED

TO SPEND THE NIGHT
WITH A WOMAN WITHOUT
OFFERING OFFENSE?

I TAKE THIS ILL

THAT YOU SHOULD
SO MISJUDGE
MY CHARACTER.

NAY. I DID NOT MEAN
TO OFFEND YOU,

BUT I'VE SCARCE
SEEN THE HOUSE.

I KNOW NOT WHAT
ACCOMMODATION THERE IS.

THEN LET US
RECONNOITER.

SHALL WE?

A BED BUT NO LINEN.

A SMELL OF MICE,
BUT NO BED. AH!

DEAR, DEAR.

A BED...

AND LINEN!

ENOUGH FOR
A WARM NIGHT.

WE'VE NOT LOOKED
AT THE ATTICS YET.

THEY LEAK.
LADY BLYSTONE TOLD ME SO.

YOU ARE NOT
PROPOSING, SIR, THAT--

YOU'VE KNOWN ME
LONG ENOUGH TO KNOW
MY CHARACTER.

DO YOU SUPPOSE
I CAN'T SLEEP

IN THE SAME BED
WITH A WOMAN

WITHOUT ACTING LIKE
A BEAST IN THE FIELD?

WE'RE BOTH
PEOPLE OF PRINCIPLE

AND FAR REMOVED
FROM LEWDNESS.

HOWEVER, IF YOU STILL
HAVE SCRUPLES, HERE.

THE RAMPARTS
OF CHASTITY.

NOW THEN...

A PILLOW.

WHAT'S THIS?

"GIN."

A VULGAR BEVERAGE,
BUT EFFICACIOUS.

[LAUGHING]

[GLASSES TINKLING]

YOU KNOW,
ON GIN AND WATER

A WORKING MAN
CAN GET DEAD DRUNK
FOR TUPPENCE.

THEY SHOULD
IMPOSE A TAX, MA'AM,

TO KEEP SUCH
PERNICIOUS LIQUORS

FROM ALL BUT
THE, UH, THE MORE
RESPONSIBLE CLASSES.

OH, LORD.

I MUST
GET OUT OF HERE!

PSST!

THE COAST IS CLEAR.

DUNS, BAILIFFS,
DEBT COLLECTORS,

THEY ALWAYS
SMOKE PIPES.

WHY DON'T YOU PAY
SOME OF YOUR DEBTS?

THEN WE COULD
WALK DOWN THE STREET

WITHOUT FEARING
A BAILIFF ON EVERY CORNER.

THEY'RE HERE!
THE BUMS!

WHY, WILLIAM!

A NOCTURNAL VISIT?

I CAME TO PAY YOU
A CALL, MY DEAR,

TO SEE
IF YOU WERE BACK.

AT DAWN?

YOU NEVER WERE
AN EARLY RISER, WILLIAM,

SO FAR
AS I REMEMBER,

EXCEPT, OF COURSE,
FOR ONE PURPOSE.

BUT I'D HEARD YOU
BECAME A CHURCH WARDEN
AT ST. BRIDES.

THE SPIRIT WAS WILLING,
BUT THE FLESH WAS WEAK.

THE SPIRIT SMELLS
UNCOMMONLY LIKE GIN.

OH, THE FLESH GROWS
WEAKER WITH THE YEARS

AND LESS ABLE
TO SUSTAIN THE EXERTIONS.

YOU'RE SO RIGHT,
MY DEAREST ONE.

POOR DEAR.

YOUR SERVANT, MA'AM.

YOUR SERVANT.

TO LIE WITH A BANKER

ON HER FIRST NIGHT IN TOWN
IS A GOOD BEGINNING.

IT SHOWS PROMISE.

[DOOR SLAMS]

WHY, MIGGY,

YOU'RE VERY PEEVISH.

HA. PAY SOME
OF MY DEBTS.

IF YOU WANTED
A RICH MAN,

YOU SHOULD
HAVE MARRIED HIM.

TWAS NOT FOR WANT
OF HIS ASKING.

I KNOW HIM TOO WELL.

HE'S A SAINT IN THE DAYLIGHT
AND A DEVIL IN THE DARK.

"SIR, WHAT HAPPENED
LAST NIGHT

"WAS MOSTLY MY FAULT.

"IT IS I, NOT YOU,
WHO SHOULD MAKE AMENDS.

"I HESITATE TO ENTRUST
YOUR RING TO A SERVANT.

WHEN CAN
WE MEET AGAIN

SO I MAY RETURN IT?"

SIR? WHAT...?

WE PUT DOWN STRAW TO QUIET
THE NOISE OF THE WHEELS.

THERE'S A MAN
IN THERE DYING.

MADAM.

MAKE HASTE
WITH THOSE LEECHES.

HE'S AS BLUE
AS A BUTCHER'S APRON.

MY HAT? WHAT SHALL I DO
WITH MY HAT?

HERE.

OH, THANK YOU.

ARE YOU THE NURSE?

WHO NEEDS A NURSE?

MY MASTER WAS OUT
ALL NIGHT IN THE RAIN.

HE'S PROMISED
1,000 POUNDS
TO THE CHURCH

IF THEIR PRAYERS
PULL HIM THROUGH.

HE RECOVERS! HE RECOVERS!

HE'S SPOKEN AGAIN.

HALLELUJAH!

AND ORDERED
TOAST AND TEA!

TOAST AND TEA!
TOAST AND TEA!

THAT'S A CHANGE
FROM WINE AND WENCHES.

HE'S REPENTED ALL RIGHT.

COULD YOU...
GIVE HIM THIS?

BUT THE CAUSE, DOCTOR,
THE CAUSE?

A MORBID FLUX
OF VISCOUS FLUID

CONGESTED THE PASSAGES
TO THE VITAL ORGANS.

I WAS NEAR DEATH?

CLOSER THAN
I AM TO YOU, SIR.

AND THIS CONGESTION OF FLUIDS--

SHH!

HERE WE ARE.
IN HERE.

AH!

THESE LEECHES, SIR,

WILL DIMINISH
THE PLETHORIC HUMORS,

AND BY REMOVING

THE UNHEALTHY EFFUSION,
REPLETION, AND EXCESS,

RESTORE YOU TO NORMAL,
IF DIMINISHED, HEALTH.

I SHALL RECOVER?

ONLY BY ADOPTING
A WAY OF LIFE

LESS ROUSING TO
THE SANGUINARY CHOLERIC

AND MELANCHOLY HUMORS.

GIVE IT BACK TO HER

AND ADMIT
NO MORE WOMEN.

BY THE BACK DOOR
OR THE FRONT.

BY NIGHT OR BY DAY,
NO MORE WOMEN.

♪ BUY A VERY FINE BRUSH ♪

♪ WILL YE BUY
A VERY FINE BRUSH? ♪

GRUNT! GRUNT!

WHERE'S BREAKFAST?

I AIN'T GOT
TWO PAIRS OF HANDS.

STIR YOURSELF, BROTHER.

HE'S HAD A LONG RIDE
AND A BUSY NIGHT.

IN HERE.

HUH?

THERE.

BREAKFAST.

BREAKFAST!

[DUTCHY]
EAT YOUR BREAKFAST

AND STOP DREAMING
OF YOUR FINE LADY.

A WIDOW.

IF ALL WENT WELL,
SHE'S A MOTHER BY NOW.

HMM. POOR,
FATHERLESS CHILD.

WHAT'S THIS?
A CONVERSION?

THE FATHERLESS
CHILDREN YOU'VE FATHERED

WOULD FILL
AN ORPHANAGE.

DUTCHY, I'VE
BEEN THINKING.

HIGHWAY ROBBERY'S
NOT WHAT IT WAS.

'TIS TIME I FOUND
A SETTLED WAY OF LIFE.

LADY BLYSTONE.

NOW, IF I HOOKED HER...

YOU? LIVE OFF A WOMAN?

MMM. WHY NOT?

IT'S QUITE RESPECTABLE,
DONE IN THE BEST SOCIETY,

AS LONG AS
YOU MARRY THEM FIRST.

MARRY?

IT'D MAKE NO DIFFERENCE
TO YOU AND ME,

JUST A KIND OF INSURANCE
AGAINST BAD TIMES.

I COULD RETIRE.

MAKE AN HONEST MAN
OF MYSELF.

TO WED A LADY OF TITLE,

YOU'D HAVE TO HAVE
SOME STATION IN LIFE.

I THOUGHT OF BEING
AN OFFICER OF DRAGOONS.

HER FRIENDS WOULD
SPOT YOU FOR A FRAUD
IN FIVE MINUTES.

NAY, BUT A SHIP'S OFFICER,
THAT COULD SUIT US.

YOU'D HAVE TO GO OFF
ON LONG VOYAGES.

MONTHS AT A TIME.

WE'D BE AS SNUG
AS A BUG IN A RUG.

NOT AN OFFICER.
A SHIP'S CAPTAIN.

AH, WITH RICH ESTATES.

ABROAD WHERE
SHE CAN'T INSPECT THEM.

I'LL NEED
A NEW OUTFIT,

SOME FINERY ABOUT ME.

SQUINT!

HALLO.

FETCH US THAT
SUIT OF CLOTHES

TWISTY STRIPPED
OFF THE ADMIRAL
ON THE PORTSMOUTH ROAD.

YES.

AND YOU, JEMMY,

YOU'LL NEED
A GOOD POWDERED WIG

AND A COACH.

HE'LL NEED SOME LIVERY.

WE'LL ALL
NEED SOME MONEY.

WHERE'S IT
COMING FROM?

I'LL ADVANCE IT.

FOR A 1/5 SHARE
OF HER INCOME
FOR SEVEN YEARS.

1/10 FOR THREE YEARS.

SIX.

FOUR.

FIVE.

DONE.

ALL AROUND IT'D BE
A GOOD STROKE OF BUSINESS.

MIXING IN SOCIETY,
YOU'D GET INFORMATION

I COULD PASS
TO OUR LIGHT-FINGERED
FRIENDS.

A RESPECTABLE
MARRIED MAN I'LL BE,

WHO KEEPS A MISTRESS
AND BUYS HER TRINKETS.

THINK OF
THE PICKINGS, DUTCHY.

AND WITH ME
A GENTLEMAN OF LEISURE,

THINK OF THE TIME
FOR LOVING.

IS THIS REAL?

UH-HUH.
AND THE LAST.

IT WILL HAVE TO GO.

OH, MY LAST DIAMOND.

WE COULD TRY
YOUR FATHER AGAIN.

HE'S AS POOR
AS WE ARE.

HE'S A DUKE.
HE CAN GET CREDIT.

YOU'RE A COUNT.
HOW MUCH CREDIT CAN YOU GET?

HE'S A REAL DUKE.

YOU MEAN YOU...

OH, MY TITLE...

THERE ARE
FAMILY DISPUTES.

UNFORTUNATELY,
MY FATHER THE COUNT
DID NOT MARRY MY MOTHER.

HOW COULD SHE
HAVE BEEN THE COUNTESS?

AH, SHE WASN'T.

SHE WAS THE COOK.

THE COOK.

AS LONG AS
SHE WAS A GOOD ONE.

COME, MY LOVE.

THERE ARE FOUR
MONEYLENDERS
WE HAVE NOT YET TRIED.

OH.

THESE MAY BE FALSE,

BUT A TRUE HEART
BEATS BENEATH THEM.

OH, MIGGY.

WAY UP. WHOA.

TWO HOUSES FURTHER ON.

RIGHT. GO ON.

GO ON.

WHOA. WHOA.

FINE SERVANTS SHE KEEPS.

YOU'D TAKE 'EM
FOR QUALITY.

NOW DON'T BE TOO LONG.

THESE FALLALS COST US
10 SHILLINGS AN HOUR.

SUIT YOUR STYLE
TO YOUR CLOTHES.

OTHERWISE SHE'LL
SEE THROUGH THEM.

ANYBODY HOME?

PSST. I'LL TURN
THE COACH AROUND.

ANYBODY IN?

AHOY THERE!

[SCRUBBING]

AAH!

YOU'LL OBLIGE ME
BY INFORMING MILADY BLYSTONE

THAT CAPTAIN MEREDITH,
ASHORE FROM HIS SHIP
THE SEA HORSE,

DESIRES A WORD WITH HER.

AND YOU'LL OBLIGE ME
BY KEEPING YOUR HOOKS
TO YOURSELF.

WHERE DID YOU GET THAT?

IT WAS STOLEN.

I AM HERE
TO RETURN IT.

AND HOW DID YOU
GET HOLD OF IT?

FROM TWO SCOUNDRELS
WHO WAYLAID ME LAST NIGHT.

I REFORMED THEM
WITH MY FISTS,

AND THEY JOINED
THE SEA LION'S CREW
RATHER THAN HANG.

ANOTHER OF YOUR SHIPS?

THE SEA LION
IS A SISTER SHIP
TO THE SEA HORSE?

AYE, AYE.
SISTER SHIPS THEY ARE,

AND NO PRETTIER
SISTERS AFLOAT.

AND THE HAT?

PART OF THE BOOTY
THE SCOUNDRELS
BROUGHT ON BOARD.

NOW CONDUCT ME
TO LADY BLYSTONE.

I'LL TAKE IT.
SHE'S NOT--

I WISH TO SEE HER
IN PERSON.

I'M NOT ACCUSTOMED
TO WAITING
IN KITCHENS.

YOU'VE WAITED
IN KITCHENS BEFORE NOW,

AYE, AND TUMBLED
THE KITCHEN MAIDS, TOO.

I DOUBT LADY BLYSTONE
WILL RECEIVE A MAN
OF YOUR MANNERS.

DON'T MISJUDGE ME,
YOUNG WOMAN.

A LIFE AT SEA
LEAVES A MAN
WITH ROUGH EDGES.

WHY, ON MY ESTATES,
I'VE RECEIVED
GREATER LADIES THAN HER.

COUNTESSES, DUCHESSES.

YOUR ESTATES?

AYE. IN VIRGINIA
AND THE INDIES.

AND YOU HAVE
TWO SHIPS AS WELL?

MM-HMM. THE SEA HORSE
LYING AT WAPPING

AND THE SEA,
UH, SERPENT

ON PASSAGE BACK
FROM JAMAICA.

MY. THAT MAKES THREE.

THE SEA LION,
THE SEA HORSE,

AND NOW
THE SEA SERPENT.

THAT'S...

A FLEET.

GOD BLESS YOU.

I'M SURE, CAPTAIN,
I MEANT NO OFFENSE TO YOU.

I'M SURE
YOU GAVE NONE.

FOR 'TIS PLAIN
YOU WERE MADE ONLY
TO GIVE PLEASURE.

I THANK YOU, CAPTAIN.

I'LL WAGER YOU GOT
SOMETHING WORTH
LOOKING AT

UNDER THAT DRESS.

I'D WAGER YOU'D SAY SO
EVEN IF I HADN'T.

I'D WAGER
YOU'D THINK YOU HAD
EVEN IF YOU HADN'T.

HMM.

I THINK, CAPTAIN,

I CAN PERSUADE
LADY BLYSTONE
TO RECEIVE YOU.

FLAWED, I FEAR,
MA'AM, AND NOT OF
THE HIGHEST QUALITY.

IT CAME FROM THE CROWN
OF THE EMPRESS OF RUSSIA.

AND YOU BOUGHT IT
FROM THE EMPRESS
HERSELF, NO DOUBT.

HOW MUCH?

50 GUINEAS.

50!

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

75?

I CAN LIVE ON
TWO MEALS A DAY,
I CAN LIVE ON ONE,

BUT I CANNOT LIVE
ANOTHER DAY ON
NO MEALS A DAY.

MIGGY.

60?

YOU WISH
TO SEE ME, CAPTAIN?

AYE, AND INSTANTLY
REGRET I HAVE,

FOR NOW
ME EYES ARE SPOILED
FOR ALL OTHERS.

THE GIRL TOLD ME
YOU HAD RETURNED MY HAT,

NOT TO MAKE MY HEAD
TOO LARGE FOR IT.

FORGIVE ME.
I CANNOT HELP WONDERING.

YES?

WAS IT A BOY
OR A GIRL?

THE MAN WHO ROBBED
YOUR COACH TOLD ME

HE SPARED YOU
BECAUSE YOU WERE--

THE BIBLICAL PHRASE
COMES EASIEST TO ME TONGUE--

GREAT WITH CHILD.

GREAT INDEED, SIR.

TWAS NEITHER
BOY NOR GIRL.

TWAS A CUSHION, SIR.

THE DOLT
WAS EASILY DECEIVED.

HE WAS SO PUFFED UP

WITH HIS PISTOLS
AND HIS ROGUE'S VANITY

HE NEVER THOUGHT
MY PADDED BELLY HELD NAUGHT

BUT A GOLD WATCH.

I UNDERSTAND, SIR,

YOU HAVE ESTATES ABROAD.

OH, YES.
A FEW COUNTIES
IN IRELAND.

IRELAND?

AND VIRGINIA AND
A PARCEL OF LAND
IN THE INDIES.

YOU INTEND TO SETTLE THERE

WHEN YOU RETIRE
FROM THE SEA

WITH YOUR WIFE
AND FAMILY?

ALAS, MA'AM,
I HAVE NEITHER WIFE
NOR FAMILY,

THOUGH I HAVE
A MIND TO BOTH,

AND FIND LIFE
AT SEA INCREASING
WEARISOME.

I WOULD, UH, OFFER YOU,
UH, REFRESHMENTS,

BUT THE SERVANTS
ARE OUT.

DON'T CONCERN
YOURSELF, MA'AM.

HANG IT, MA'AM,

A LIFE AT SEA
MAKES A MAN
DIRECT OF SPEECH.

I UNDERSTAND
YOU'RE A WIDOW.

MMM.

WIDOWHOOD, LIKE THE SEA,
GROWS TEDIOUS.

MMM.

HERE WE ARE,

BOTH ADRIFT
AND SENDING OUT
SIGNALS FOR A TOW.

WHY DON'T
WE LIE ALONGSIDE?

A NAUTICAL FIGURE
OF SPEECH, MA'AM.

I'M SUGGESTING
WE LASH TOGETHER

AND DROP ANCHOR
TONIGHT IN SOME
PLACE OF ENTERTAINMENT

WHERE I MAY
OFFER YOU REFRESHMENT.

FORGIVE ME BOLDNESS,
MA'AM.

I'M USED
TO CHARTING A COURSE
AND SEEING IT STEERED.

AND WHERE WILL YOU
STEER ME, CAPTAIN?

IN FAITH, MA'AM,

I'D STEER YOU
THROUGH HELL

FOR THE HEAVEN
YOU PROMISE
WITH THOSE...

EYES.

[CARRIAGE APPROACHES]

AND NOW YOU MUST GO.

GO?

GO. HA HA.

MA'AM, I FEAR--

FORGIVE ME.

I SAY,
I MEAN WE--

THOUGH 'TIS HOURS
TILL WE MEET...

YOU MUST GO.

I GO WITH FEELINGS
BEYOND BEARING.

AYE, BUT GO! GO!

MA'AM, THIS HEART
OF MINE IS FULL
OF SENTIMENTS

THAT ARE FULL OF...

SENTIMENT.

SQUINT! WAKE UP,
YOU LAZY LANDLUBBER.

HE SEEMS GRANDLY
DRESSED FOR A BAILIFF.

A LAWYER PERHAPS.

COME TO FORECLOSE
THE MORTGAGE.

OH! OH!

THAT GENTLEMAN CALLED?

I, UH, SENT HIM AWAY.

OH, YES,
YOU SENT HIM AWAY.

GOOD GIRL.

MIGGY.

TRY IT HERE.

UM...

I FORGOT, UH...
MY, UH, COACHMAN.

SQUINT.

HALLO.

I'M 2 GUINEAS SHORT.

IF I TOLD YOU ONCE,
I TOLD YOU A HUNDRED TIMES,

YOU'RE SPENDING
MONEY LIKE WATER.

THAT'S NO GOOD.

SLIT A PURSE
AND BRING ME THE MONEY

AND MAKE IT QUICK.

QUICK, HE SAYS.

QUICK.

I'LL THANK YOU
FOR MY SEAT, SIR.

I'LL THANK YOU
FOR THIS, SIR.

GO FUMBLE
YOUR TROLLOPS,

BUT KNOW A LADY
WHEN YOU SEE ONE.

STRAY CATTLE
MUST BE CLAIMED.

FOUND ABANDONED,
ONE PRIZE HEIFER.

SHE'S NOT
IN CALF YET.

[LAUGHTER]

HE'S NOT
MAN ENOUGH.

CHAIR TO CORNHILL,
PLEASE.

CHAIR.

[DOG BARKS]

OH!

AAH!

IF YOU WANT A WOMAN,
GO FIND A WHORE!

AAH!

IT'S ME!

I'LL KILL THE PUP! TAKE THAT!

AAH!

WHAT HAVE THEY DONE
TO YOU?

GOD BLESS YOU,
ME BOY, AND KEEP YOU
FROM HARM.

AAH!

THANKS FOR THE LOAN
OF THIS!

TOO LATE.
THE BILL'S PAID.

WHAT'S THE WEATHER
LIKE?

LOVELY.
MOON AND STARS.

'TIS TIME
WE ENJOYED THEM.

NOW PERHAPS
YOU'LL BELIEVE

I'M A BAD MAN
TO CROSS.

LET'S GET HIM!

YES. DON'T LET HIM GET AWAY!

[CARRIAGE APPROACHES]

[SQUINT]
WHOA, WHOA.

TOMORROW.

WHEN?

AS SOON AS YOU WAKE.

I HAVE APPOINTMENTS
TILL EVENING.

WILL YOU KILL ME
WITH WAITING?

IT IS I WHO SHOULD DIE
OF IMPATIENCE.

IF WE BOTH SURVIVE,
I'LL CALL FOR YOU.

WHERE SHALL WE GO?

SOMEWHERE QUIETER THAN TONIGHT.

YOUR SHIP. WE COULD DINE IN
YOUR CABIN...ALONE.

AYE, BUT--

WHICH SHIP LIES AT WAPPING?

THE SEA LION,
THE SEA HORSE,
OR THE SEA SERPENT?

'TIS THE SERPENT.
SO FAR AS I REMEMBER.

I'VE NEVER SEEN
HOW A CAPTAIN
LIVES ON A SHIP.

I'VE NEVER BEEN
ON A SHIP.

I DOUBT THE CREW...

UNTIL TOMORROW.

AYE.

AND THEN ON BOARD.

AM I WRONG, OR HAVE I
SEEN THAT DRESS BEFORE?

LADY BLYSTONE ALLOWS ME
TO WEAR HER DRESSES...

ON MY NIGHTS OFF.

HA HA! AMUSING.

I MASQUERADE
AS A SERVANT,

YOU AS A LADY.

AMUSING...SO LONG AS
I'M NOT INDISCREET

AND TELL YOUR HANDSOME
GENTLEMAN WHAT YOU ARE.

I SUPPOSE YOUR SILENCE
HAS A PRICE.

OF COURSE.

YOUR PART
IS EASIER TO PLAY,

FOR YOU HAVE BY NATURE
A FOOTMAN'S LEWDNESS.

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

AH.

[SINGING IN ITALIAN]

A SHIP!
LAD, YOU MUST BE JOKING!

I SAID I HAD SHIPS.
SHE'S A FANCY TO DINE ON BOARD.

10 SHILLINGS.

15.

AN EXPENSIVE COURTSHIP. 12.

SOLD.

I'VE GOT HER RIGHT
ON THE HOOK.

WE'VE SPENT
10 GUINEAS ON
THE COACH ALREADY.

IF SHE'S WORTH
10,000 A YEAR...FOR LIFE.

A CAPTAIN'S CABIN
HAS A CAPTAIN'S
BEDROOM ADJOINING,

AND I'VE NEVER KNOWN
MY JEMMY TO FAIL

WHEN HE'S GOT
THE RIGHT FURNISHINGS.

MM-HMM.

GRUNT!

HELLO?

HIRE US A SHIP.

A SHIP?

ONE SHIP.

WHOA. WHOA.

WHOA, BOY. WHOA THERE.

GOODNESS! FIVE?

FIVE?

WHY...WHY, 'TIS
AN ARMADA YOU OWN.

OH, YES.

WHOA.

27 HOURS. THAT'S
ANOTHER GUINEA.

MONEY, MONEY, MONEY.

THAT'S ALL I EVER
HEAR...MONEY.

GET UP!

HERE ARE
YOUR THINGS,
BROTHER.

WHAT A HANDSOME SHIP.

AYE. SHE'S A KETCH
SLOOPED GAFF-RIGGED,

SQUARE-BOTTOMED
THREE-MASTER.

WHAT IS YOUR CARGO?

GOLD FROM THE INDIES,
SPICES FROM THE EAST.

CAN'T YOU
SMELL THE ODORS
OF THE ORIENT--

CINNAMON, CLOVES,
NUTMEG, VANILLA?

[SNIFFING]

HUH?

JUST HERE,
IT'S MOSTLY THE ODOR
OF THE SHIP'S CAT.

HOW I'D LOVE TO SAIL
THE SALT SEAS

AND SEE
STRANGE PEOPLE'S LANDS.

HOW EXCITING
IT MUST BE.

I'M LEARNING
THAT LIFE ASHORE
HAS EXCITEMENTS, TOO.

YOU WOULDN'T
GROW WEARY...

OF THE DAILY ROUND
AND YOUR OWN FIRESIDE?

NOT IF
THERE WERE SOMEONE
TO SHARE IT WITH.

[BELL RINGS]

SIX BELLS, CAPTAIN.

18 MINUTES PAST 9
AND VICTUALS ON THE TABLE.

ALL FAST
AND TIDE ON THE TURN.

THANK YOU.
BEFORE THE CREW ARE FED,

MAKE SURE
ALL TOP GALLANTS
ARE BATTENED DOWN,

ALL CAPSTANS, UH...

SPLICED.

SHALL WE GO BELOW,
MA'AM?

ALL CREW ON DECK!

OUT OF YOUR HAMMOCKS,
YOU SCURVY LOT OF CARRION!

[BLOWS WHISTLE]

MUSTER ALOFT
TO YOUR VICTUALS!

SHOW A LEG! SHOW A LEG!

TO YOUR LEFT.

[SQUINT]
AH, MUSTER!

GET OVER ON
THE STARBOARD SIDE!

MUSTER ALOFT THERE,
SKIVVIES!

GET OVER THE STARBOARD
SIDE THERE!

AYE, AYE.

[STOMPING AND YELLING]

PUDDING.

HA HA!

HOT PUDDING.

AH! THANK YOU, CAPTAIN.

ME EYESIGHT
AIN'T WHAT IT WAS

SINCE I LOST AN EYE
IN A SEA FIGHT.

THE CAPTAIN HIMSELF
WERE NEAR SHOT IN HALF

WITH A BROADSIDE
OF CHAIN SHOT.

HE PULLED ME
AND FOUR SHIPMATES

FROM THE MOUTH
OF THE DUTCH CANNON

DESPITE HIS BOOTS
WERE FULL
OF BOILING OIL,

AND THE SHARKS
WERE SNAPPING UP
ARMS AND LEGS

LIKE TIDBITS FROM
DAVY JONES' LOCKER.

THANK YOU, COOK.
WE ARE SERVED NOW.

♪ I KNEW A GIRL WHO LIKED
SAILORS FOR SPORT ♪

SQUI...COOK!

♪ AND A SAILOR'S LIFE-- ♪♪

COOK!

PARDON, CAP'N. ME LEGS
AIN'T WHAT THEY WERE NEITHER...

AND THAT'S THE TRUTH.

LOYAL FELLOW, THAT.

I SEE YOU'RE MUCH ADMIRED
BY YOUR CREW.

AYE, A GOOD LOT
OF LADS.

ROUGH,
BUT SOUND IN HEART,

IF NOT IN WIND
AND LIMB.

IS THAT YOUR CABIN?

AYE.

MAY I LOOK?

PLEASE DO.

THAT'S
ME BACHELOR BUNK,

WHERE I'VE SPENT
MANY AN HOUR

DREAMING OF THINGS
NOT POSSIBLE.

NOT POSSIBLE?

I THOUGHT THEM
NOT POSSIBLE...TILL NOW.

WELL...

'TIS ELEGANT...
FOR A MAN.

A MAN ON HIS OWN

NEEDS SOME SOFTNESS
ABOUT HIM.

WHAT... WHAT
STRANGE SIGHTS YOU...

YOU MUST HAVE SEEN
LOOKING THROUGH
THIS WINDOW.

I'VE SEEN
STRANGE SIGHTS ENOUGH.

ONE GROWS SICK OF THEM.

ALL ONE WANTS IS
THE SAME SIGHT, EVERY DAY.

WAKING.
GOING TO SLEEP...

EVERY DAY.

EVERY NIGHT.

[BUGLE PLAYS OFF-KEY]

OW!

[SKYLIGHT OPENS]

ENSIGN LOWERED, CAPTAIN.
ALL FAST ASTERN.

UH, THANK YOU,
BOATSWAIN.

CREW FED,
TIDE MAKING FOUR KNOTS,
ALL FAST FORWARD.

I WISH YOU'D GO
FORWARD...AND FAST.

AYE, AYE, CAPTAIN.

[WHISTLES]

BOATSWAIN GOING
OFF DUTY, CAPTAIN.

THEN FOR GOD'S SAKE,
GO, MAN!

MY COMPLIMENTS,
SIR!

AND MY COMPLIMENTS TO YOU!

GOD SAVE THE KING.

GOD SAVE THE KING,
AND TO HELL WITH THE REST!

OH.

WHAT WERE WE SAYING?

UH, I FORGET THE WORDS.

IT WAS WHAT
YOUR EYES SAID.

THERE WAS NO MISTAKING
THE MEANING THERE.

AND WHAT
DID MY EYES SAY?

TRANSLATE FOR ME,
MY DEAR.

WE HAVE NO NEED
OF A TRANSLATOR.

WE SPEAK THE SAME TONGUE
IN ALL THINGS
AND HAVE THE SAME--

[WHISTLE BLOWS]

NINE BELLS.
WIND'S BLOWING
FROM THE NORTH!

OW! OOH! OW! OOH!
OW! OOH! OOH! OW!

OW!

POURING WITH RAIN.

STINKING RAIN.
I CAN'T SEE A BLA--

OH!

AAH!

[SPLASH]

OH!

BEGGING YOUR PARDON,
CAPTAIN.

WHAT DO YOU WANT?

I WAS SURVEYING THE BILGE
FOR BARNACLES...

YOU BUNGLING CESSPIT
OF INCOMPETENCE!

OH! OH!

GO AND PUT YOURSELF
IN IRONS!

KEEL...

KEELHAUL YOURSELF!

BEGGING YOUR PARDON,
CAPTAIN, AND THE LADY'S--

GO AND THROW YOURSELF
IN A RIVER!

I JUST HAVE DONE.

WELL, DO IT AGAIN!

BUT IT'S RAINING.

OH, UGH!

[WHISTLE DOESN'T SOUND]

[WHISTLES]

[GIGGLING]

[CRASH]

[YELLING]

OH, DEAR! OH, DEAR.

I THINK WE'RE SINKING.

NO, NO. IT'S, UH...

IT'S JUST COME ADRIFT.

[WHISTLE]

WE ARE SINKING.

[YELLING]

ALL HANDS ON DECK
AT THE DOUBLE!

[BLOWS WHISTLE]

CAN'T YOU DO ANYTHING
BUT BLOW THAT
BLASTED WHISTLE?

NO!

LET'S RUN.

MAKE FAST AND SHOW
THESE FRESHWATER
MUD PICKERS

THE KIND OF SEAMANSHIP
THAT WE EXPECT
ON THE, UH...

THE, UH...

SEA ANEMONE.

THANK YOU.

[WHISTLE]

AAH!

CHAIR!
CHAIR!

I'M NOT SURE
I HAVE THE FARE.

MY PURSE...ON THE SHIP.

I HAVE IT.

SHAME ON ME NOT TO
TAKE YOU HOME IN STYLE.

LOVE.

9:00 IN THE EVENING.

NO.

NAY, I'LL GO ON
NO LONGER.

IT SICKENS ME,
THIS DECEIT.

SHE'S NOT A FOWL
FOR THE PLUCKING.

MAKE THIS ONE MATCH,

AND YOU'LL NEVER
HAVE TO STEAL AGAIN.

WHERE ARE YOU
TAKING HER TONIGHT?

TO THE GARDENS
AT RANELAGH.

DON'T SPARE THE WINE.
OYSTERS ARE IN SEASON.

WARM HER WITH DANCING,
THEN PUT THE QUESTION.

EXPENSES!

NAY, LAD, I CAN
READ YOU LIKE
THE FACE OF A CLOCK.

YOU THINK
THE QUESTION'S
BEST PUT

WHEN YOU'RE SNUG
BETWEEN THE SHEETS.

YOU DRAW AWAY
FROM THAT

OUT OF FAITHFULNESS
TO ME.

DO I GUESS RIGHT?

OH, AND I LOVE YOU
FOR IT!

BUT I'M A WOMAN
OF THE WORLD,

AND TO SHOW I BEAR
NO GRUDGE,

I'LL PREPARE
MY OWN ROOM FOR YOU.

THERE YOU CAN
ENJOY YOURSELVES

AS WELL AS
MAN AND WOMAN CAN

WHO COME TOGETHER
FOR CONVENIENCE.

WELL, JEMMY, WOULD YOU RATHER
SLEEP UNDER HAYSTACKS?

WINTER IS COMING.

A RICH WIDOW WILL
KEEP OUT THE DRAFTS.

COME ON, SQUINT.

RIGHT.

BACK TO WORK.

[FIREWORKS EXPLODE]

I THINK THEY'RE EXPECTING US
TO JOIN THE DANCE, MILADY.

WHAT IS IT?

I WAS AFRAID.

OF A KISS?

OF A SECRET.

YOURS?

I HAVE A SECRET, TOO.

YOU HAVE?

IF I TELL MINE,
WILL YOU TELL YOURS?

TELL ME YOURS FIRST.

WELL...

I'M NOT WHAT
YOU TAKE ME FOR.

WHAT?

I'M NOT LADY BLYSTONE.

WHO ARE YOU, THEN?

I AM...

LADY BLYSTONE'S,
UH, COMPANION.

WHAT'S IN A TITLE?

I'M JUST AS READY
TO TAKE YOU
AS PLAIN MISS.

MRS. I'M A WIDOW.
THAT PART WAS TRUE.

SO LONG AS A MAN
AND WOMAN CAN LIVE
COMFORTABLY TOGETHER,

WHAT DO NAMES MATTER?

YES, BUT COMFORTABLY IS
A WORD OF TWO MEANINGS.

I MEAN, BY FIRST
THEY SHOULD NOT QUARREL,

AND SECONDLY,
THEY SHOULD HAVE ENOUGH
TO LIVE ON.

WE'LL HAVE THAT,
WON'T WE?

WITH YOUR WEALTH,
OF COURSE WE WILL.

OH, BUT I...

I HOPE YOU DON'T
TAKE ME FOR
A PERSON OF FORTUNE.

YOU'RE JOKING
OR TESTING MY INTENTIONS.

I WISH I WERE.

BUT YOU LIVE IN A HOUSE
WITH PEOPLE IN SOCIETY.

YOU--YOU DRESS LIKE...

I'VE SEEN A FOOTMAN
OPEN THE DOOR TO YOU

AND BOW AS IF--

I'VE NAUGHT
BUT 15 GUINEAS
LEFT IN THE WORLD.

ODDS WOUNDS.
YOU JADE.

YOU'VE GULLED ME.

OUT OF MY WAY!

NO!

ANYTHING I CAN DO?

NO!

PLEASE,
LET ME THROUGH.

CAPTAIN.

CAPTAIN.

CAPTAIN. CAPTAIN, PLEASE.

CAPTAIN, I KNOW
THAT I'M TO BLAME,

BUT TWAS DONE
IN THE WAY OF A JOKE.

I NEVER TOLD YOU
I WAS OTHER THAN I AM.

YOU LET ME BELIEVE...

THAT WAS
YOUR OWN FANCY.

DID YOU DISABUSE ME?
YOU TRICKED ME.

NO. YOU TRICKED
YOURSELF.

RUINED. I'VE LAID OUT
EVERY PENNY I OWN.

I BORROWED, SO I'LL BE
IN DEBT FOR YEARS.

YOU...RUINED?

HIRING A CARRIAGE?
DRESSING LIKE A LORD?

LIVERY, WINE,
STABLES, OATS--

HIRING A WHOLE SHIP.

THE CARRIAGE
WASN'T YOURS?

NO.

THE SHIP?

NO.

YOU'RE NOT A SEA CAPTAIN?

NO!

BUT YOUR ESTATES...
IN VIRGINIA?

NEVER OWNED AN ACRE.

IN THE INDIES?

NOT A YARD.

IN IRELAND?

NOT AN INCH...

SAVE THE SIX FEET
OF MY MOTHER'S GRAVE.

AND YOU SAY THAT
I'VE TRICKED YOU.

YOU ROOKED ME FIRST.

I DID NOT.

YOU INTRODUCED YOURSELF
AS A CAPTAIN.

NOT TILL YOU CURTSIED
AS LADY BLYSTONE.

LIAR!

SHAM!

SWINDLER!

IMPOSTOR!

FORTUNE HUNTER!

SUCCUBUS!

VAMPIRE!

BLOODSUCKER!

COCKATRICE!

10,000 PLAGUES ON ALL WOMEN!

TURN IT OFF!

WE SHALL SEE EACH OTHER
NO MORE,

SO LET US PART
AS FRIENDS.

OW! OW!

IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT.

STEALING HER HAT BOX
AGAINST MY ORDERS.

DRAWING CONCLUSIONS
FROM A LADY'S NAME.

LADY BLYSTONE!
WHAT IS YOUR NAME ANYWAY?

MOLL FLANDERS,
CAPTAIN MEREDITH.

IS MEREDITH
YOUR NAME?

NO. IT'S JEMMY.

JEMMY.

THE OTHER'S BEST FORGOT.

I'VE BROUGHT
NO HONOR TO IT.

WILL YOU STILL BE
WANTING THE ROOM, CAPTAIN?

DON'T CALL ME CAPTAIN!

WHAT ROOM?

I HIRED A ROOM.

WHAT ROOM IS THIS?

I HIRED A ROOM
WHERE WE COULD
BE ALONE TOGETHER.

NOW THERE'S
NO PURPOSE IN IT.

I WAS RAISED

WHAT THEY CALLED
A GENTLEMAN.

I LEARNED TO LIVE HIGH,

WITHOUT THE MEANS
TO DO IT.

MMM...
AND GOT INTO DEBT.

FOUND NO WAY
TO CLEAR YOURSELF.

I FOUND A WAY.

TWAS NOT TO MY LIKING.

WHAT WAY?

NAY. TELL ME MORE
OF YOURSELF.

THEY SAY MY FATHER
WAS HANGED.

MY MOTHER TRANSPORTED.

I WAS RAISED
BY THE GYPSIES.

I SAW NOTHING BEFORE ME
BUT BEING A DRUDGE,

SO I RESOLVED TO BETTER
MYSELF BY MARRIAGE.

WE BOTH HAD
THE SAME NOTION.

A PRETTY PASS
IT'S LED US TO.

FOR NOW,
MY HEART'S IN PAWN.

I DOUBT I'LL EVER
REDEEM IT.

AND I'M £100
THE MORE IN DEBT.

I'VE NOT MUCH LEFT,

BUT...'TIS ALL YOURS,

EXCEPT THIS ONE.

IT'S MY ORPHANAGE
SHILLING.

WHAT?

HE'S...

WHY?

IT'S LOVE, DUTCHY.

LOVE.

LO--

JEMMY?

JEMMY!

JEMMY!

"MY DEAR,

"I ASK YOUR PARDON.

"I AM THE MOST MISERABLE
OF MEN.

"I HAVE BEEN SO HAPPY
TO POSSESS YOU,

"AND AM NOW SO WRETCHED

"AS TO BE FORCED
TO FLY FROM YOU.

"FORGIVE ME, MY DEAR.

ONCE MORE I SAY, FORGIVE ME."

OH, JEMMY...

COME BACK. COME BACK!

WILL YOUR LADYSHIP
REQUIRE THE ROOM
FOR ANOTHER NIGHT?

YOU CRY FOR THE LOSS
OF WHAT YOU STOLE.

I'LL NOT WIPE
YOUR TEARS FOR YOU.

NAY, BUT I'M WRONG
TO BLAME YOU.

HE'S THE SORT OF MAN

THAT MAKES
A SERVANT GIRL
FORGET HER DUSTING

AND OPEN THE WINDOWS
TO STARE

AS HE WALKS
DOWN THE STREET.

YOU KNEW HIM, TOO?

IN THE WAY OF BUSINESS.

JEMMY.

OH, JEMMY.

WHY DID YOU
GO AWAY FROM ME?

I HAD RIDDEN 15 MILES.

THE SUN WAS IN MY EYES
AND A GALE BLOWING.

TWAS THAT PERHAPS
PUT FANCIES IN MY HEAD.

WHAT FANCIES?

I THOUGHT I HEARD YOU
CALL FOR ME.

WHAT DID I SAY?

YOU CRIED ALOUD...

"JEMMY, OH, JEMMY.
COME BACK, COME BACK."

WHY, 'TIS A MARVEL
PAST BELIEF,

FOR THOSE WERE
MY WORDS.

OH, YOU SHALL
GO AWAY FROM ME
NO MORE.

I'LL GO
ALL OVER THE WORLD
WITH YOU RATHER.

THERE'S...SOMETHING
I CANNOT SPEAK OF.

ONE DAY PERHAPS
WE'LL MAKE OUR FORTUNES,

AND WE'LL MARRY
FOR MONEY

LIKE WE ALWAYS
THOUGHT WE WOULD.

I CAME BY
A POUND OR TWO.

DEBTS REPAID.

'TIS LITTLE.

JEMMY.

[BELL RINGING]

AH, THERE YOU ARE, MOLL.

THANK YOU, DEAR.

CRYING FOR YOUR CAPTAIN?

POOR GIRL,
TO LEARN SO YOUNG
THAT MEN DECEIVE.

YOU'RE BETTER OFF IN THE HOUSE
THAN GADDING ABOUT TOWN.

TOMORROW YOU CAN
SHINE THE MIRRORS

AND WASH THE LUSTERS.

NOW GO GET ME
MY GLOVES.

YES, I HAVE THEM HERE.

WILL YOU BE LATE,
MILADY?

YOU NEEDN'T WAIT UP.
I HAVE MY KEY.

GOODBYE, MIGGY.

[FOOTSTEPS]

GOODBYE, MY LOVE.

ENJOY YOUR BALL
AND GATHER ME
SOME GOSSIP.

HMM. I'M SO SORRY
TO LEAVE YOU ALONE.

COACHMAN, STOP. STOP!

WHOA!

COACHMAN?

[TAPPING]

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

A RAT! A RAT
AS BIG AS A CAT!

AH...

ONE CANDLE...

TO LIGHT
SO MUCH BEAUTY.

THE LESS
I SEE OF MYSELF
TONIGHT, SIR,

THE MORE
I'LL BE PLEASED.

I'M NO FIT SIGHT
FOR MYSELF OR ANYONE ELSE.

WHERE HAVE I BEEN
NEVER TO SET MY EYES

ON THE MOST
BEAUTIFUL WOMAN
IN THE WORLD.

PLEASE, I'M TIRED,
AND I WISH TO GO TO BED.

A RAT!

ECCO! ECCO!

AAH!

ECCO!

[CRASH]

TOUCHE.

OHH!

OHH! OHH!

OHH!

[GROANS]

WHAT IS IT, SIR?

A BOTTLE...

A GREEN BOTTLE
BESIDE MY BED.

RUN, CHILD.

RUN!

[SINGING SANTA LUCIA]

AAH!

HERE.

JUST IN TIME.

AN OLD WOUND
BENEATH MY HEART.

WERE YOU IN THE WAR?

NO. A DUEL. WOMEN.

WOMEN.

WHERE?

LOOK, LOOK.

AAH!

NAUGHTY.

YOU--!

NAUGHTY.

STAND BACK. GET BACK. GO AWAY!

NAUGHTY. NAUGHTY.

OOH, YOU BEAST!
YOU BEAST!

EN GARDE!

HA HA HA!

BRAVO! HA HA HA!

AH...AH...

AH-CHOO!

FORCE THE DOOR,
TIPSTAFF!

OPEN UP, THERE!

OH! OH, DEAR.

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

SEIZE HIM!

MILADY?

DEVIL! LUSTFUL MONSTER!

SEE WHAT SORT OF WOMEN
YOU CAN FIND--

WELL,
DON'T JUST STAND THERE.

GO AND GET HIM,
YOU IDIOT.

THERE. AND YOU,

YOU HAVE
DISAPPOINTED ME.

YOU HAVE BETRAYED
MY FRIENDSHIP

AND ABUSED MY TRUST.

OH, BE GONE, TROLLOP.

I NEVER WANT TO
SET EYES ON YOU AGAIN!

ONCE BEFORE, I HAD TRIED
TO RETURN THIS RING

TO MY FRIEND THE BANKER.

FRIEND?

IT WAS A SOMEWHAT
CLOSER RELATIONSHIP.

AND YET...

I WAS DOUBTFUL HOW
HE WOULD RECEIVE ME NOW.

MADAM.

AH, YES, OF COURSE.

YOU MUST FORGIVE ME.

I'VE COME BACK
FROM THE GRAVE.

I NEVER THOUGHT TO SEE YOU
OR THE WORLD AGAIN.

I CAME TO RETURN
YOUR RING, SIR.

I CAME ONCE BEFORE, BUT...

I HOPE
YOU'RE RECOVERED.

MMM. BUT CONDEMNED TO
AN ALTERED WAY OF LIFE.

I'M FORBIDDEN COMPANY
AND PLEASURE

AND CONDEMNED TO...
NEEDLEWORK!

WHAT'S THE RESULT?
FOUR BOTTLES OF PORT A DAY

TO MAKE MY SOLITUDE BEARABLE,
AND NOW I'VE GOT THE GOUT.

BY HEAVENS,
I'M GLAD TO SEE YOU.

I UNDERSTOOD, SIR,

YOU'VE BEEN
REPENTING YOUR SINS.

THE APOPLEXY
THREW ME INTO A FRIGHT.

BUT NOW
YOU'RE CURED, SIR.

I FIND THE REPENTANCE
IS CURED ALSO.

I THINK, SIR,

YOU'LL NEVER
MAKE YOURSELF
A SAINT.

YOU'RE PERFECTLY RIGHT.

YOU HAVE EVERY REASON
TO REPROACH ME

FOR MY WAY OF LIFE.

I'M A MONUMENT
TO THE FOLLIES OF VICE,

A MEMENTO OF
THE SNARES OF PLEASURE.

AND FROM ALL THIS,

FROM THE BURNING,
FIERY FURNACE

AND THE STINKING PIT,
ONLY YOU CAN SAVE ME.

ME? BUT HOW?

THUS!

OOH, SIR!

BOATMAN.

YES, SIR?

CAN YOU ROW THE BOAT
FACING THE OTHER WAY?

WHOA! WHOA!

AH. COUNTRY AIR
TO BRING PINK
TO THE CHEEKS.

SWALLOWS FLYING HIGH.

A GOOD OMEN
FOR OUR HONEYMOON.

IS OUR ROOM READY?

IT'S BEEN READY
SINCE NOON.

IS THE PARSON
READY?

HE'S BEEN IN THE TAPROOM
ALL DAY, SIR.

YOU MIGHT SAY
HE'S READY.

AH!

[HUMMING]

COME ON, PARSON,
YOU SWEET-SMELLING OLD FELLOW.

DOWN YOUR DRINK
AND GET TO BUSINESS.

WE HAVE THE BRIDE, GROOM,
AND YOUR WITNESS.

YOU HAVE THE RING,
SON?

ME, NOT HIM, YOU FOOL!
I'M THE GROOM.

HE'S THE WITNESS,
AND THIS IS THE RING.

LANDLORD, HAVE YOU
A BOOK OF COMMON PRAYER?

COME ON, FELLOW,

SURELY YOU KNOW
YOUR PARSON'S GABBLE
BY NOW.

AHEM. "MAN THAT IS
BORN OF WOMAN

HATH BUT
A SHORT TIME
TO LIVE--"

NOT THE BURIAL SERVICE,
YOU POXY OLD GOAT!

WE'RE GETTING MARRIED.

AH, WEDLOCK!

WEDLOCK IT IS TO BE.

COME ON NOW, REVEREND.

COME ON.

DEARLY BELOVED,
WE ARE GATHERED HERE

IN THE SIGHT OF GOD

AND IN THE FACE
OF THIS CONGREGA--
CONGREGATION...

OUT! GET ALONG.
HURRY, WILL YOU?

OH, THAT ALL YOUNG GIRLS
WHO WATCH THIS SCENE

WOULD LEARN ONE LESSON--

WEALTH AND POSITION
AND COMFORT BY DAY

WILL NOT MAKE UP
FOR INSINCERITY AT NIGHT.

HA HA!
WE'RE AT IT AGAIN!

[CHURCH BELLS RING]

OW!

WHAT THE--

NOW THEN...

HA HA HA!

I'M TICKLISH.

[HORSES APPROACH]

EVERY TIME.

IS THERE A CONSPIRACY
AGAINST CONSUMMATION
OUT THERE?

COME BACK TO BED,
MY DEAR.

COME, COME, MY DEAR.

YOU'LL CATCH
YOUR DEATH OF COLD.

BY GOD, ARE WE TO HAVE
NO PEACE TONIGHT?

WHAT'S TOWARD? HAVE YOU
NO BEDS TO GO TO?

A ROBBERY
ON THE HEATH.

HAVE YOU SEEN
TWO MASKED HORSEMEN?

A YOUNG ONE
AND A STOUT ONE?

I SAW TWO HORSEMEN, SIR.

WHAT'S THAT YOU SAY,
MA'AM?

IT WAS DARK,
AND I COULDN'T
SEE VERY WELL,

BUT THEY
TOOK THAT ROAD.

THANK YOU, MA'AM.

WRONG TRACK. WE'LL TRY
THE CANTERBURY ROAD.

COME ON, COME ON!

COME ON.

JEMMY.

OH, DO COME BACK,
MOLL.

OH, COME ON, MOLL,
I'M WAITING.

AH...

THERE YOU ARE.

MOLL! MOLL!

GO BACK
THE WAY WE CAME.

JEMMY!

JEMMY!

JEMMY!

JEMMY!

STOP, JEMMY!

MOLL. MOLL.

[HORSES APPROACHING]

OFFICER...
APPREHEND THOSE MEN

AND RECOVER
THE PERSON OF MY BRIDE,

WHO WAS ENTICED AWAY,
AND IN THAT DIRECTION.

FOR YOUR WARM ASSISTANCE, SIR,
THANK YOU, SIR.

COME ON! RIDE ON!

RIDE ON! AT 'EM!

GET IN THERE BEHIND THE TREES.
I'LL TAKE 'EM AWAY.

SEE YOU IN LONDON
THEN.

THEY MUST BE
AROUND HERE SOMEWHERE.

TWO MEN--
YOU AND YOU--
UP THAT WAY.

THERE'S OUR FOX!

COME ON!

HOLD ON!

NOW WHERE'S THE DEVIL
GONE NOW?

TALLY HO!

AAH!

WELL, DAMN YOU, SIR!

AT YOUR SERVICE, SIR.

NO, CHILD, NO.

I HAVEN'T SEEN
YOUR CAPTAIN

SINCE THE NIGHT
YOU SLEPT HERE.

OH.

YES?

I CAME TO ASK IF YOU COULD
RECOMMEND ME TO ANY EMPLOYMENT.

I, RECOMMEND YOU?
YOUR FACE AND FIGURE DO THAT.

NO GENTLEMAN WOULD
REFUSE TO EMPLOY YOU.

I'M NOT A WHORE,
MA'AM.

DON'T SAY THAT
TOO SOON.

THOUGH SOMETIMES
AN APPARENT MODESTY

SELLS THE GOODS
TO A HIGHER BIDDER.

WHAT IS IT YOU WANT?

I WANT...

I NEED TO
MAKE MY FORTUNE.

MAKE YOUR FORTUNE.

IF YOU WON'T
MAKE IT IN BED,

THEN WORK
WITH YOUR FINGERS.

YOU MEAN
I SHOULD SEW?

DEAL.

DEAL IN WHAT GOODS?

SILVER.

THOUGH IF IT'S
A FORTUNE YOU WANT,

THAT'S QUICKER MADE
WITH GOLD.

MA'AM,
I UNDERSTAND YOU.

AND I DO NOT LIKE
YOUR MEANING.

SEE HOW FAR YOU GET
WITH HONEST LABOR!

MISS, YOU, UH...

THANK YOU, MA'AM.
THE KNOT MUST HAVE BROKEN.

OH, LET NONE
WATCH THIS SCENE

WITHOUT THINKING
HOW THEY WOULD GRAPPLE

WITH THE LACK OF FRIENDS
AND THE WANT OF BREAD.

LET THEM REMEMBER
THE WISE MAN'S PRAYER--

"GIVE ME NOT POVERTY,
LEST I STEAL."

THIS WAS THE BAIT,

AND THE DEVIL WHO LAID
THE SNARE PROMPTED ME.

TAKE THE BUNDLE.

NOW!

WHAT HAD I DONE?

WHAT WAS I NOW?

A CHRISTENING SET.
GRUNT!

I HOPE YOUR FRIEND
DIDN'T LOSE THE CHILD,

AS SHE'S SELLING
THESE THINGS.

TRY TO GET SILVER
WITHOUT INITIALS.

FETCHES A BETTER PRICE.

YOU'VE NOT SEEN JEMMY AGAIN
SINCE I LAST ASKED YOU?

14 SHILLINGS, SWEETHEART.
CONGRATULATIONS.

THANK YOU.

COULD YOU...
HOLD HALF THE MONEY?

I'D LIKE TO SAVE IT.

GLADLY, MY DEAR.
I'LL MARK IT DOWN
IN THE LEDGER.

GOOD DAY.

IN OUR BUSINESS, MY DEAR,
WE MUST MAKE SURE

THAT SUCCESS DOES NOT
LEAD TO FAME.

SO FOR YOUR
NEXT ADVENTURE,

NO GENTLEMAN
MUST LOOK AT YOU TWICE.

COME ALONG.

SIT DOWN.

TRY ON THAT BROWN WIG
ON THE WALL.

NOW THEN...

NOT A BAD HAUL,

CONSIDERING THE RICH
ARE OUT OF TOWN.

I WANT HALF IN MY ACCOUNT.
I'M SAVING.

WHY, JEMMY,
WHAT'S GOT--

[DOOR CLOSES]

[FOOTSTEPS]

HA HA HA!

THAT'LL BE ALL,
MRS. O'TOOLE.

THANK YOU.
THAT'LL BE ALL.

GOOD EVENING, LADIES.

HERE.

GOOD EVENING, SIR.

COACHMAN,
TO THE PARK...

SLOWLY.

YOU TANTALIZING
CREATURE, YOU.

MMM...

[COUGHS]

DARLING...

I'M VERY LATE, YOU KNOW, SIR.
COACHMAN, STOP, PLEASE.

NO, NO, NO,
SURELY, YOU--

BUENAS NOCHES, SEñOR.

AND A NOBLEMAN, TOO.

'TIS 10-TO-1 HE HAS
AN HONEST, VIRTUOUS WIFE

AND INNOCENT CHILDREN.

THIS DEED OF YOURS WILL
DO MORE TO REFORM HIM

THAN ALL THE SERMONS
AT ST. PAUL'S,

FOR IN OUR BUSINESS,
WE DO A LOT OF GOOD--

TEACHING PEOPLE
TO MIND THEIR MORALS

AND GUARD
THEIR POSSESSIONS.

YOU...
JEMMY HASN'T...

4 AND 11 IS 15.

NOW, I'VE BEEN
CONSIDERING

YOUR POSITION
IN THE TRADE, DEAR.

IT'S NOT WISE
TO STICK TO
THE SAME BUSINESS

AND AT
THE SAME PLACES
FOR TOO LONG.

BROCADE WILL
FETCH AS MUCH AS
A GENTLEMAN'S WATCH.

BROCADE?

AND A GOOD ROLL
OF LACE EVEN MORE.

GRUNT!

I'D BE AFRAID
TO WORK AT A SHOP.

THEY HAVE EYES ON YOU
WHEN YOU ENTER THE DOOR.

LOOK.

GRUNT, TO WORK.

OH, YES.

GOOD DAY, SIR.

GOOD DAY, MA'AM.

I'M LOOKING FOR
SOME FINE RED VELVET.

AH, THERE'S
A HANDSOME PIECE.

NO, I'M AFRAID TOO COARSE.
SOME OTHER TIME.

GOOD DAY, SIR.

GOOD DAY, MA'AM.

ALL RIGHT, THEN.
I'LL CATCH YOU.

NO, YOU WON'T.

POOR SOULS.
THEY'RE ON THEIR WAY
TO NEWGATE.

POOR SOULS INDEED.
IT SERVES THEM RIGHT.

I HOPE THEY HANG.
THEY'RE ONLY THIEVES ANYWAY.

THAT'S OLD
BLUE NOSE CHARLIE.

ENOUGH. ENOUGH.

THE JEWELER'S SHOP.
CAN YOU SEE THE WINDOW?

YES.

BOTTOM PANE
IN THE MIDDLE, RIGHT?

RIGHT.

YOU SEE THE CLOCK?

CLOCK?

UP THERE. ALL RIGHT.
NEVER MIND.

IN 12 1/2 MINUTES,
THE CLOCK WILL STRIKE 1:00.

YOU'LL BE HOLDING YOUR HORSE
OUTSIDE THE JEWELER'S SHOP.

WHEN THE CLOCK STRIKES 1:00,
YOU THROW THE BRICK, RIGHT?

RIGHT.

BOTTOM PANE. MIDDLE OF
THE JEWELER'S WINDOW.

RIGHT.
THE BOTTOM PANE.

I'LL DO THE SNATCH
AND RUN TO MY HORSE.

I RIDE THAT WAY,
YOU RIDE THAT WAY.

WHAT IF I DON'T
HEAR THE CLOCK?

DON'T TELL ME
YOU'RE DEAF AS WELL.

WHY DON'T WE
MAKE IT 2:00?

THEN, IF I MISS THE FIRST,
I'LL HEAR THE SECOND.

LET'S MAKE IT 3:00.

YES. THEN IF
I MISS THE FIRST
AND THE SECOND...

DEAF AS A BLOODY POST,
RIGHT? COME ON.

RIGHT.

[SPLASH]

HERE'S THE BRICK.

GOOD. COME ON.

WHILE I'M HERE,
CAN I, UH...

NO.

OH.

THANKS, LAD.

COUNT TO 100
AND THEN MOVE.

HOW FAST?

AT A WALK.

HOW FAST
DO I COUNT?

AS FAST AS
YOUR HEART BEATS.

IT'S GALLOPING.

START COUNTING NOW.

1, 2, 3, 4,
5, 6, 7, 8,

9, 10, 11...

A NICE HANGING
AT TYBURN.

BUY A DOLL FOR YOUR
LITTLE ONE, SIR?

50, 51, 52, 53,

54, 55, 56...

LET'S HAVE A DRINK.

WE'LL PICK UP THOSE
OTHER PRISONERS LATER.

NO, NO. SOMETHING
MUCH FINER.

SOMETHING MORE PRECIOUS.
SOMETHING FIT FOR A QUEEN.

A QUEEN.
OH, LET ME SEE.

[CHIMING]

99, 100.

[DOG BARKS]

WHERE IS IT?
WHERE ARE THEY?

AH.

AAH! AAH!

IS THAT YOU?
GOOD HORSE.

AAH! STOP! STOP!

GIVE ME YOUR BAG.

GIVE IT TO ME.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

STOP HER! STOP HER!

HERE, YOU!

KID!

STOP HIM!

HEY! HEY!

SQUINT, HOLD ON!

GIDDYUP! GIDDYUP!

WHOA. WHOA!

WHOA!

WHO WOULD WANT
A THING LIKE THAT

EXCEPT THE LORD
CHIEF JUSTICE?

THAT BLIND HALF-WIT.

HEY.

THERE'S
SOMETHING INSIDE
COULD BE SOLD,

AND IT WOULDN'T
BE DIFFICULT
TO FIND A BUYER.

GRUNT?

MOLL.

OH, JEMMY.

THERE'S THE RUINATION

OF THE FINEST PAIR
OF THIEVES IN TOWN.

RUN!

AAH!

SOLDIERS!
LOOK OUT!

THERE THEY ARE.
COME ON. GET 'EM.

BREAK THAT DOOR DOWN.

GET AWAY!

THERE SHE IS.
DON'T LET HER GET AWAY.

IT'S NOT HER
YOU WANT.

IT'S ME.
SHE'S NO THIEF.

GET OFF.
LET GO OF HIM.

HELP ME! HELP ME!

AAH! LET ME GO!
LET ME GO!

AAH!

WE'VE STARVED
TOGETHER,

STOLE TOGETHER,
SPENT TOGETHER.

NOW WE'LL
HANG TOGETHER.

WHEN WILL IT BE?

THEY PUT A LIST UP
ON MONDAYS.

WHY DON'T THEY
DO IT QUICK,

DO IT
STRAIGHT AWAY?

JEMMY.

HERE. TAKE THIS.

ARE YOU
COMFORTABLY LODGED?

A GENTLEMAN
OF THE ROAD

GETS USED
TO ROUGH QUARTERS.

TWO CHEATS.

FOR A NIGHT,
TWO LOVERS,

AND NOW
TWO THIEVES.

WHO DID THAT?

JEMMY!

ALL RIGHT!

GO ON.
GET IN THERE.

WHAT NEWS?

WHAT NEWS?

EVERYWHERE
THE SAME TALE.

NOTHING CAN BE DONE
WITHOUT MONEY.

YOU PUT ME IN HERE.
YOU MUST GET ME OUT.

CHEESE? IT DISTURBS
MY LIVER.

I'LL NEVER
FORGIVE MYSELF.

I THOUGHT YOU'D BE
IN DEBTORS' JAIL

FOR JUST
A FEW WEEKS.

BUT YOU WERE DEALING
IN CONTRABAND.

CONTRABAND? A FEW
DOZEN BOTTLES
OF HOLLAND'S GIN.

OH, WHAT A COUNTRY.

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

HAVE YOU SEEN
MY AMBASSADOR?

YES. HE COULD
DO NOTHING.

GET ME OUT
OF THIS HOLE.

AND ONE MORE THING--
DON'T BRING CHEESE.

♪ TWAS IN THE CITY
OF LONDON ♪

"NAUGHT AWAITS
THE SINNER

"BUT THE BOTTOMLESS PIT

"AND THE BOILING
BRIMSTONE.

REPENT AND YE
SHALL BE SAVED."

SAVED FROM WHAT?

YOUR SOUL
SHALL BE SAVED.

IT'S MY NECK
I WANT SAVED.

♪ I WENT STROLLING ♪

♪ DOWN ON
MY FAVORITE STREET ♪

♪ A PRETTY LITTLE
YOUNG MAIDEN ♪

♪ I HAPPENED
BY MERE CHANCE TO MEET ♪♪

WHAT'S IT SAY?

I'LL NOT LIE TO YOU.

WHAT'S TODAY?

MONDAY.

OH. THERE IS A MISTAKE.

THEY HAVE
THE WRONG NAME.

TELL THAT
TO THE HANGMAN.

MY POOR FRIEND.

I AM
A GOOD CATHOLIC.

I SHALL WRITE
TO THE POPE.

YOU...AH.

YES.

I CAN'T READ.
ARE I ON IT?

TELL ME, SWEETHEART.
ARE I ON IT?

IS ME NAME THERE?

"MARI LA JOURE.

"SARAH MATT.

"MAGGIE MANT.

"JANE FOLLY.

"ALICE HOLLAND.

"ANNIE HUGHES.

"MOLL FLANDERS.

"BERTHA SMITH.

EMMA MARTIN..."

THOSE WHO HAVE ENJOYED

THE WICKED PART
OF MY STORY

WOULD RATHER PERHAPS
I LEFT THE GOOD PART OUT.

BUT CAN THEY BE THOUGHT TO
RELISH MY SINS AND MY CRIMES

AND FIND
MY REPENTANCE TEDIOUS?

WOULD THEY RATHER
THIS STORY WERE
A COMPLETE TRAGEDY?

I WILL HURRY OVER

THE INSTRUCTIVE DETAILS
OF MY CONVERSION

AND COME TO WHAT
I BELIEVED

WAS THE LAST DAY
OF MY LIFE.

UNDER THE AWFUL THREAT
OF THE GALLOWS,

I HAD COME
TO SINCERE REPENTANCE.

IT WOULD CERTAINLY
HAVE LASTED, I THINK,

UNTIL THE FRIDAY.

BUT...ON THURSDAY,

THE VERY DAY BEFORE I WAS
TO BE HANGED...

BUT I'VE TRIED.
I'VE TRIED EVERYTHING.

TRY, TRY HARDER.

BUT IT'S HOPELESS,
MIGGY.

THERE'S NOTHING
THAT CAN BE DONE NOW.

ONE LAST CHANCE.

[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

MAN THE CAPSTAN!

LEFT, RIGHT, LEFT, RIGHT,
LEFT, RIGHT.

LEFT, RIGHT,
LEFT, RIGHT.

HORNPIPE!

ADMIRAL
FITZHAFFEDEN,
GOVERNOR OF NEWGATE,

WELCOMES ON BEHALF
OF THE BOARD
OF GUARDIANS,

HIS WORSHIP,
THE LORD MAYOR
OF LONDON.

HOW ARE YOU,
GEORGE?

A FINE
NAUTICAL WELCOME.

I SEE YOU
STILL RUN YOUR JAIL
LIKE A MAN-O-WAR.

LIKE A FLAGSHIP,
MY LORD MAYOR.

FALL IN ASTERN.

WE LEAD THIS
FLEET OF LOST SOULS

TOWARDS THE SHORES
OF REDEMPTION.

AMEN.

SHUT UP.

THE YARD, MY LORD MAYOR,
WHERE THE PRISONERS

HAVE THE BENEFIT
OF HEALTHY EXERCISE

AND THE BLESSING
OF FRESH AIR.

THE, UH, PUMP.

THE PUMP.

WHICH DOCTOR
WILL TELL YOU

GIVES
AN AMPLE SUPPLY
OF WHOLESOME WATER.

MMM.

SPEAK UP, MAN.

RICH IN MINERAL SALTS

AND OTHER
HEALTH-GIVING ELEMENTS.

AND THE DIET OF
THE PRISONERS, DOCTOR?

OH, WE SEND THEM
TO THE SCAFFOLD
PLUMP AS PULLETS.

THAT'S ENOUGH, MAN.

TO OUR RIGHT,
THE MEN'S QUARTERS.

AND TO OUR LEFT,
THE FEMALE QUARTERS.

OH, MY LORD MAYOR.
DEAR, GOOD SIR,

I PLEAD
FOR A PRISONER
OF NOBLE BIRTH,

MOST MONSTROUSLY
SENTENCED TO BE HANGED.

NAY, MY GOOD WOMAN.
THIS IS NOT A COURT OF APPEAL.

PRAY TAKE THE COMPLAINT
TO THE PROPER QUARTER.

HERE ARE
THE COMMODIOUS PREMISES

DESIGNED FOR
THE RECEPTION
OF OUR WOMEN.

WILLIAM.
OH, WILLIAM.

SARAH.

USE YOUR INFLUENCE

FOR ONE MOST
UNJUSTLY BETRAYED
AND CONDEMNED.

I'M BUT A MEMBER
OF THE BOARD
OF GOVERNORS.

PRAY TO
THE GOOD LORD
FOR HIS DELIVERANCE

AND GET HIM
A GOOD LAWYER.

WHY, WILLIAM.

MAGGIE, HOW NICE
TO SEE YOU AGAIN.

YOU OUGHT TO
COME HERE
MORE OFTEN.

GET US
OUT OF HERE.

AND THIS, MY LORD MAYOR,
IS THE CONDEMNED HOLD.

THESE UNHAPPY
CREATURES ARE
TO HANG TOMORROW.

LET US HOPE THEY HAVE
REPENTED OF THEIR SINS.

AMEN.

QUIET!

IN ONE CASE, A MOST STRIKING
ACHIEVEMENT HAS BEEN MADE

BY WAY
OF REPENTANCE.

UH, MOLL FLANDERS.

SHE'S HAD PLENTY
TO REPENT ABOUT.

I'LL TELL YOU,
I WOULDN'T MIND
REPENTING WITH HER.

BUT, WILLIAM,
PLEASE.

MOLL. MOLL.

MY WIFE.

[GASP]

HELP!

WILLIAM.

HE'S ALL YOURS,
PARSON.

NOW, MY LORD MAYOR,
AS I WAS SAYING...

OH, YES, ADMIRAL.

THE, UH...

♪ HER EYES ♪

♪ THEY SHONE
LIKE EMERALDS ♪

♪ HER EYES ♪

♪ THEY SHONE
LIKE EMERALDS ♪

♪ THEY CALL HER
THE FAIREST
OF FAIR ♪

♪ AND THE BLACK
VELVET BAND
SHE WAS WEARING ♪

♪ WAS TIED IN HER
RED GOLDEN HAIR ♪

YEAH.

♪ HER EYES ♪

♪ THEY SHONE
LIKE EMERALDS ♪

♪ THEY CALL HER
THE FAIREST
OF FAIR ♪

♪ AND THE BLACK
VELVET BAND
SHE WAS WEARING ♪

♪ WAS TIED IN HER
RED GOLDEN HAIR ♪♪

COME ON.
WAKE UP, SWEETHEART.

NO. 'TIS NOT TIME.

MOLL!

MOLL!

GET IN THERE.

COME IN, GIRL.

OUT, GUARDS! OUT!

COME ALONG IN, DEAR.

YOU ARE KNOWN
AS MOLL FLANDERS?

SIGN THERE.

ASK NO QUESTIONS.

THERE IS LITTLE TIME.

CAN YOU SIGN
YOUR NAME, GIRL?

YES.

THEN DO SO.

BOTH NAMES
THERE AND THERE.

BOTH NAMES?

AS THE WIDOW
OF SIR WILLIAM,

TO WHOM YOU WERE
LAWFULLY MARRIED,

YOUR TRUE NAME
IS LADY GODOLPHIN.

SO KINDLY SIGN
MOLL GODOLPHIN

THERE WHERE
I'VE INDICATED.

UNDER
EXPECTATIONS

OF AN INHERITANCE
OF 50,000 POUNDS,

YOU ARE BORROWING
A THOUSAND AT INTEREST.

YOUR LATE HUSBAND
DIED WITHOUT
MAKING A WILL.

YOU ARE HIS
SOLE BENEFICIARY,
LADY GODOLPHIN.

FOR 500 POUNDS,
YOU MAY BUY A REPRIEVE.

YOUR SENTENCE
WILL BE REDUCED

TO TRANSPORTATION
TO AMERICA.

I WILL SEE THAT THE MONEY
GETS TO THE PROPER PERSON.

[GRUNTING]

♪ RULE,
BRITANNIA... ♪♪

ALL I ASK
IN RETURN

IS THAT YOU LEND ME
A LIKE AMOUNT

TO SECURE
THE REPRIEVE
OF THE COUNT.

I...

I WISH TO BORROW
5,000 POUNDS.

FOR WHAT?

TO BUY THE REPRIEVES
FOR SEVERAL OTHER PERSONS.

ANY MORE REPRIEVES
WILL COST
A THOUSAND EACH...

GUINEAS.

750.

800.

POUNDS.

DONE.

AND 500 MORE
FOR MY OWN POCKET

TO GET STARTED
IN AMERICA.

DAMNED IF I KNOW
WHY YOU WANT
TO GO THERE.

I'D RATHER
BE HANGED.

♪ RULE,
BRITANNIA ♪♪

EXCUSE ME, MADAM.
I'M NO CONVICT

AND HAVE THE PRECEDENCE
OF A VOLUNTARY PASSENGER.

STRIKE OFF
THESE IGNOBLE CHAINS

THAT ONLY INJUSTICE
COULD HAVE FORGED.

WHERE HAVE I BEEN AND
NEVER TO HAVE SET MY EYES

ON THE MOST
BEAUTIFUL WOMAN
IN THE WORLD?

ON SECOND
THOUGHT, NO.

LEAVE THE
LAST CHAIN ON.

COME ALONG,
MIGGY, DEAR.

BUT, DARLING...

"I, JAMES,
TAKE THEE, MOLL,

TO BE MY LAWFUL
WEDDED WIFE..."

I, JAMES,

TAKE THEE, MOLL,
TO BE MY LAWFUL
WEDDED WIFE...

"TO HAVE AND TO HOLD

FROM THIS
DAY FORWARD..."

TO HAVE AND TO HOLD...

FROM THIS DAY FORWARD...

"FOR BETTER,
FOR WORSE,

"FOR RICHER,
FOR POORER.

IN SICKNESS
AND IN HEALTH..."

FOR BETTER,

FOR WORSE...

FOR RICHER,

FOR POORER...

IN SICKNESS
AND IN HEALTH...

"TO LOVE
AND TO CHERISH,

TILL DEATH
DO US PART..."

TO LOVE
AND TO CHERISH...

OOPS. I'M SO SORRY.

TILL DEATH
DO US PART...

[BELL RINGS]

[RING]

"ACCORDING TO GOD'S
HOLY ORDINANCE,

AND THERETO
I PLIGHT THEE
MY TROTH."

ACCORDING TO GOD'S
HOLY ORDINANCE...

AND THERETO
I PLIGHT THEE
MY TROTH.

I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU
MAN AND WATCH--ER...

MAN--MAN AND WIFE.

'TIS USUAL
TO PAY A PARSON
FOR A WEDDING.

DOES A CAPTAIN
ACCEPT A FEE?

WELL, YOU
CAN GIVE ME
A SHILLING FOR LUCK.

I HAVE IT.

I SHAN'T
NEED THIS ANYMORE.

WHO SAID
I WAS DECEIVED

WHEN I MARRIED A GIRL
FOR HER MONEY?

I MARRIED A FORTUNE.

AND A VERY
GOOD FORTUNE, TOO.

JUST A MOMENT.

JUST A MOMENT.
JUST A MOMENT.

ARE YOU
ACCUSING ME, SIR?

I HAVE NOTHING
IN MY POCKETS.

I'VE NEVER
BEEN SO HURT
IN ALL MY LIFE.

AHEM.