Tempo massimo (1934) - full transcript
A meek professor is swept over his feet by a very vivacious girl.
FULL SPEED
- Good morning, professor.
- Good morning, Antonio.
The light is still on.
You were up late again last night.
"The spirit is willing,
but the flesh is tired".
These are Petrarch's words, you know?
Antonio...
With imagination, I sometimes see
perfection in the woman... of my dreams,
the woman I write about,
the one of a time gone by.
Do such women still exist?
Certainly!
But with them,
it is difficult to write poetry.
- Giacomo, good morning.
- Am I not right, Antonio?
- Why, dear, already awake?
- Good morning, Aunt Agata.
- Why, dear, already up?
- Yes, not long since.
You must have worked late last night.
You strain yourself too much!
If I wasn't here to take care of you...
Take your good cod liver oil.
- Pardon me, ma'am, milk first.
- No, no! Oil first.
- The young master prefers milk first.
- I said oil first!
- Giacomo!
- Yes, Aunt Agata.
- Do not get too much sun!
- Don't worry, Aunt.
Don't wear yourself out
and be back by five o'clock,
no later!
You see Antonio, to be happy
all I need are my books, my flowers,
some money of my own
and never to have met dear Aunt Agata.
I understand perfectly, professor.
- Goodbye.
- Good catch.
- And I beg you, be cautious.
- Yes, goodbye.
- Good morning, professor.
- Good morning, Giuseppe.
"In vain, oh woman,
I long to find you."
"Are you on land, sea, or in heaven?"
"To meet you, alas, I wish."
Giuseppe, a fish!
This is sheer madness!
What can you say in your defence?
Only a criminal could...
- My apologies, miss.
- I didn't mean to fall on top of you.
- I'm sorry, sir... sir?
- Professor Giacomo Banti.
- Dora Sandri.
- I...
I regret having spoken
not very polite words, but...
- Shall we get out of the water?
- Gladly.
Listen,
will you help me find a dry dress?
Certainly, but I wouldn't know
where to find it.
- Is your house near?
- Yes.
- Then you'll give me one of your wife's.
- I have no wife, but...
- Perhaps, Aunt Agata's.
- Very well!
- Lady Agata...
- Yes?
- The young master... come, quick!
- Oh God, what is it?
Giacomo! Oh God, you drowned?
Dear Aunt Agata,
let me introduce you...
- Look at yourself!
- Dear Aunt Agata...
How did you get into such a state?
Antonio, hurry!
It's my fault.
It was a minor accident.
My name is Dora Sandri.
I'm sorry to disturb you so, but...
the professor insisted
so much that...
I... I thought...
I thought...
- The lady certainly needs to change.
- I'll take care of that, very gladly!
In the meantime, you go to your room,
go to bed and try to sweat.
Antonio, a cup of hot
chamomile tea, quick!
Come, master.
You, miss, come with me.
You'll choose a dress you like.
- What a character, Miss Sandri!
- Do you know her?
Everybody knows her!
Magazines keep publishing
photos of her. This week too.
Many millions. Millions, and sports.
You better keep quiet
until she stays.
- Is she staying?
- For dinner only.
Lady Agata had no choice
but to ask her.
- Antonio...
- Sir?
My black suit.
Have you gone mad?
Do you want to get sick?
- Back to your bedroom.
- But, Aunt...
Back to your bedroom, and sweat!
Here I am!
You're wearing the dress
of our poor Clara, Giacomo's mother?
- Maybe I did wrong?
- Not at all.
- How come you're up already?
- Real foolishness!
Please, miss.
Yet, you should go back
to your room and try to sweat.
I don't need to sweat, I feel great.
I can stay, can't I?
- Antonio!
- Yes, ma'am?
Lay an extra place
for the young master.
- Oh! Is there a child here?
- Why?
I recognized
the horrible bottle of cod liver oil.
It's for Giacomo!
- You will find it ridiculous...
- No, I'm just a little surprised,
but I think that, after the oil,
you'll take a good cocktail too.
Cocktail? God forbid, never!
No alcohol!
Did you see a woman
descending by parachute?
I said, did you see a woman
descending by parachute?
- And a bar descending by parachute?
- Come on, he doesn't get a thing.
- No women, no bars!
- Let's go!
I owe you an explanation.
I fell from the sky for a bet.
- For a bet?
- Yes, with my friend, Prince Huerta.
We've always made bets.
Before, just for fun,
and now, to get married.
- To get married?
- Yes.
You'll find all this terribly immoral,
but I do it so, as a sport.
- A sport?
- Yes.
A sport...
Poor Bob!
I'll marry him only if he wins a bet,
but I do all I can
to keep the danger far away.
- Did you seen a woman jump from a plane?
- No women here.
Come Bob, let's go.
I shall go.
I'm sorry I can't wait for your friends,
but it's late. I must go.
Goodnight, and thank you very much.
You're welcome, miss, and goodnight.
I can't stand it anymore.
Please give me a cigarette.
I wish I could, but I don't...
- You don't smoke?
- No.
Let's go into the garden.
What a magnificent greenhouse!
- Orchids! How beautiful!
- This is a very rare specimen.
So rare that I dare say it's unique.
- It's the flower I cherish the most.
- What a pity!
It would look so good
on this dress...
Please, no!
Thanks, but why, professor?
Because it pleased you.
What a perfect gentleman!
Professor, you don't drink,
you don't smoke...
Tell me, does this life as a hermit
make you happy, although among flowers?
Yes, I'm happy.
And have you ever thought
how nice it would be
if you had next to you a young,
pretty, affectionate woman
who'd be in love with you?
- No.
- No?
But I'm sure that
the day you find love,
you'll be happy to fall into it.
- Do you think?
No, we haven't seen anyone here.
- Shall we go to the villa down there?
- If you want...
Professor Banti's villa?
It's useless, you know? Good evening.
- Let's have a drink, I'm thirsty.
- What a great idea!
How wonderful! And tell me,
have you read all those books?
Not only have I read them,
but I've also studied them carefully.
- And do you play the piano?
- No...
Don't lie to me, Banti,
I know you compose.
I saw some notes on the piano...
Come on, let me hear something.
I'm expert enough,
and I'll be a very severe judge.
No, you see, Miss Sandri...
- I don't like the music you prefer.
- What?
- Yes, I'm sure you love jazz.
- Why, don't you like it?
- I'm sorry, but I don't.
- Really?
At least to me, jazz is not music.
True music must express
what nature tells us,
the poetry of the mountains.
- Oh, how nice!
It must harmonize the increasingly
strange melodies of the lake...
How wonderful!
- Enhance our purest feelings!
- Cute!
- And the soul needs to rise...
- What soft fur!
Oh, sorry, Mr. Giacomo.
It's Bob! What a pity.
Oh, Dora, here I am!
- Still in one piece? Nothing is missing?
- No.
- At last!
- Thank goodness we've found you!
We've been looking for you for 4 hours!
Tell us, what happened?
The wind made me fall in water,
but Mr. Banti saved me,
risking his life.
Muchas gracias.
Prince Huerta, Popi Carli...
Giacomo Scotti...
Not Giacomo, Dora!
I'm Jack, simply Jack!
- Carletto Sabatini.
- It's a pleasure.
You see? You lost the bet.
Yes, dear, but eventually I will win.
The stakes are too good.
- But Dora, what are you wearing?
- It's funny, but it's Aunt Agata's.
- Aunt Agata? So we can drink then!
- Silence, please.
Aunt Agata is sleeping,
don't make any noise. Come with me.
- Fine, in silence.
- We just want to drink.
Tell me about it!
- Please...
- I just want to drink.
- Be polite.
- As long as we drink.
- I don't think there is any liquor here.
- In a house like this? Just imagine!
- Some cognac?
- I'll find it now!
Antonio, the gentlemen would like...
but do we have some...?
Leave it, I'll deal with Tony.
Come on!
- Remember, strong stuff!
- Popi, you go to the cellar with Tony.
- Where is the dining room?
- Here.
- And what's there?
- The studio.
Let's go!
Professor, I'm dismayed.
- It's my fault, right?
- No, miss.
Maybe you didn't expect such a fuss.
Yes, it's not very usual for me.
Our life here is so quiet.
- And what do you think of Bob?
- Bob?
Very elegant ... and...
Do you love him?
What are you saying? Love!
It's he who is set to marry me.
Cherries...
This and this...
Cognac! Bueno!
You don't love him
and you let him marry you?
They are two distinct things.
Moreover, I haven't decided anything yet.
Perhaps, on a day of disappointment,
if I don't have anything better...
Bob is decorative, he loves sports...
- He loves sports?
- Yes.
- Like you?
- Like me.
Dora!
- Have you found something?
- I haven't found anything.
No wonder...
Oh, some cherries!
Tomorrow you'll go back to your life
with your flowers, your books...
...and you'll forget me.
- No, don't say that.
I hope to see you again soon.
Oh, New Year's Eve!
Where will you spend it?
I don't know. Here, I presume.
Listen, if I write to you,
will you join us?
We'll go to the mountains.
I assure you, it's such good fun!
- I bet you'll forget.
- I accept, I'm sure I'll win.
- Here. Cheers to Dora!
- Thanks.
Don't you drink?
I should be offended...
- I cannot.
- Why?
I've never drunk liquor,
I might get sick.
- No!
- Oh yes.
- This drink must be devilish.
- Devilish!
Take my advice, professor, drink!
NEW YEAR'S EVE, 1938
- That's enough.
- Are you satisfied? Did you eat well?
- Oh, sure!
- Then give me a kiss.
- No, I gotta go.
- Why?
Because, if my mistress comes,
she'll raise hell.
Don't worry, when she's out with Mr. Bob,
she always comes back home late.
Why, is that monkey
still running after her?
Monkey!
- To begin with, Bob is a handsome guy.
- What, maybe you like him?
- Alfredo...
- I bet he kissed you.
Don't start being jealous again.
Please.
I've told you so many times!
It's bad for you to be a teetotal,
and it's bad for you to be always
covered in the dust of those books.
Come in my two-seater at 140 kph,
and the dust will vanish!
Yes, the dust will vanish!
Hello?
Give me that artichoke, I'll eat it!
- Whoops!
- Bravo!
- Whoops!
- Bravo!
- Professor, you must drink.
- Don't abuse of his hospitality.
Right! Thanksgiving!
And we thank the professor...
for champagne and cognac.
And we thank the professor...
And we thank the professor...
...and goodnight to the musicians.
The light's gone?
The professor makes savings!
Now they'll stop making noise
and will go away.
Let's hope so.
Dora, dear,
be good and let's go home.
I promise that we'll go at 150 kph
and be home in half an hour.
No, Miss Sandri.
I find it unwise that
you go away with... at this time...
Sorry...
There is room for everyone
here at home. Right?
- But Lady Agata...
- There is room for everyone, right?
The gentlemen could stay
until morning.
Good idea, professor. I accept.
Approved unanimously.
Thank you, Giacomo... Mr. Giacomo.
Goodnight, dear.
See you tomorrow.
Goodnight.
Bye, Jack. You're Jack, like me!
Bye, Tony.
Goodnight, Giacomo,
and remember New Year's Eve.
But I'll see you again tomorrow,
I always get up early.
- Oh, really? See you tomorrow then.
- See you tomorrow.
I told my heart not to love...
I told my heart not to dream...
because I always thought that love...
only was but vanity.
But from the day I saw you...
now I know what love can be...
It is pure magic...
I love you so...
and I tell my heart: you gotta love.
Master...
Is the young lady up?
Miss Sandri left a few hours ago.
- But what time is it?
- 12 o'clock.
Why didn't you wake me up?
I cannot trust anyone in this house!
- Didn't she leave a message for me?
- Yes.
I must repeat these words of hers:
"Do not forget New Year's Eve".
Hello, my boy, how are you?
You're better, right?
You can be happy now, they are all gone.
The hubbub is over!
- Enough!
- What's the matter?
I don't want to be treated
like a child anymore!
- But my boy...
- I am a man!
- Who's laughing?
- Nobody's laughing!
- Antonio!
- I? I swear I'm not!
Dear Prince,
do you intend to pay, or not?
- Listen, my dear friend...
- I'm no longer your dear friend!
Pay! Or I'll make you understand
once and for all
that endorsements on bills
of exchange must be authentic.
Be reasonable.
You well know
I'm going to marry Miss Sandri.
You've said that too many times,
I no longer believe it.
- This time it's true, word of honour.
- Word of honour...
I give you two months, after which...
Fix the date?
Why, have I lost a bet, maybe?
That's not the point.
But there is much talk
about our marriage in society.
An old aristocrat good friend of mine
asked me the date. He must leave,
and he really needs to know.
Oh, the poor old Marquis!
I think he can go twice around
the world, and still be in time.
It would be really annoying, though.
- Hello, Dora.
- Popi!
Will you take a nice snapshot of me?
I really need one.
DO NOT FORGET NEW YEAR'S EVE.
MARGHERITA HUT, MONTE ROSA.
HOW TO BECOME A MAN IN 8 WEEKS
Another mysterious parcel.
What can it be?
Let's open it, ma'am.
Stop! Don't touch that parcel!
Don't touch this parcel.
I need it for the congress.
What congress?
I told you, at the end of the month
I must go to Rome.
- Just during the New Year holidays?
- Yes.
- Antonio, he wants to go to Rome!
- I'm afraid ma'am...
5th WEEK
6th WEEK
7th WEEK
8th WEEK
- Please, ma'am.
- Antonio!
Him again!
- Antonio!
- What now?
"Make a test, and no one will resist"
"the strength of your muscles."
- Has the master called?
- Yes, have you shut the door?
- Yes.
- Don't move.
Picture 35.
Here, 200 lire for you...
And forgive me, huh?
Nothing?
Obviously, the system is wrong.
Sorry again, so sorry! And please,
do not say anything to my aunt.
It's wrong.
- What did he want?
- Do not ask me, ma'am.
It's terrible. My poor professor!
- What have you got there?
- Do not ask.
I must know, I am his trustee,
I have to look after him!
- Giacomo...
- Tell me.
- Giacomo...
- What?
- Nothing?
- Nothing.
Bye, Auntie! Bye.
He smokes too now!
It's over... it's over.
It's over!
WATCH OUT, DRIVING SCHOOL
Not my fault!
I wanted to steer to the right...
Good morning!
Please, I want a first...
- A first class for the Margherita hut.
- For the Margherita hut?
Yes, in the Aosta Valley.
You must get off
at Pont-Saint-Martin.
- Pont-Saint-Martin?
- Yes.
Then give me a first for
Pont-Saint-Martin and one for Rome.
Right away, sir.
Thank you, doctor, you reassured me.
But it will be very difficult to
persuade him to go to the mountains.
- Antonio!
- It's him!
Go away! If he finds you here,
he might have a nervous breakdown!
- Giacomo, dear, I want to talk to you.
- What do you want, Aunt?
Listen...
You absolutely must not go
to that congress in Rome.
Not to go?
Don't make me laugh!
Listen carefully, Aunt Agata,
my decision is irrevocable.
"I'd rather break, than bend".
I dare say: "Rome or death"!
But you're tired!
I want what is best for you.
- In Rome, with so many people...
- I'm leaving!
- You'll fall sick! You must not...
- I'm leaving!
In short, don't forget that I'm the owner
of this house and you shan't go!
But I've trained.
I've studied for 8 weeks
for this congress! And you say...
- I must leave and I'm leaving!
- I'm saying this for your own good.
Listen, Giacomo...
Will you listen to what I'm saying?
You've mentioned your money too often!
But remember,
nothing will keep me from going!
Moreover, I have a ticket already.
You mustn't go to Rome. For your health,
you must go to the mountains.
- To the mountains?
- Yes.
Alright.
Antonio will immediately go
and buy a ticket for you.
No need, Aunt. I already have one!
- Enough, stop it!
- It's almost midnight.
- Dora...
- Give me a cigarette.
The new year starts
in a few minutes.
For the last time this year,
I'm asking you:
when do we get married?
For the last time this year,
I'm telling you I don't know yet.
You don't want me to believe
you're thinking of Professor Jack, huh?
- And what if I was?
- I would kill him.
Attention, guys!
I think there's one minute left!
They've already given
the first signal at the refuge!
How silly!
I bet he's in his mansion now,
in his slippers and dressing gown...
And celebrating the New Year
with Dante and Aunt Agata.
Drinking cherry syrup.
Attention! Another red rocket!
They're lighting the fireworks!
- He won't come, want to bet?
- Okay, let's bet.
- The usual stakes?
- Sure.
Bueno. But mind you,
this time I'll win!
It's midnight!
Hurray!
- Me too, guys!
- Me too!
I'm so happy!
Here he is!
Bravo, here he is!
We'll give you a drink now
to warm you up.
- Oh, Banti!
- As you see, I kept my promise.
- And you lost.
- Obviously.
Happy New Year, professor. I'm so happy.
But why did you come so late?
- I walked all the way here.
- You walked! How brave!
- To the New Year, professor.
- Thanks.
- Happy New Year, Bob.
- Happy New Year.
Happy New Year, Popi.
- Happy New Year, Jack.
- Happy New Year, Dora.
Happy New Year everybody!
Happy New Year.
Professor, you've joined us.
Bravo!
Jack, nice guy, you drink too, huh?
Do you like it? English Mixture.
Very sweet! It's mixed with honey.
Up here in the mountains,
up here near the sky,
close to your lover,
your heart melts.
Up here in all this snow,
life is more peaceful,
youth is light,
the heart beats harder!
Bravo, professor!
END OF PART ONE
PART TWO
- Dora, vamos!
- Here I am!
Professor, what are you doing?
I'm coming... I'm coming with you
down to the valley.
Want to break your neck?
God forbid!
You come with the cable car.
Meet you at noon, at the hotel.
Bye bye!
Bye bye!
Do you really want to go
down to the valley on skis?
- Yes, they all do.
- Don't do it. It's difficult.
If I don't start, I'll never learn.
I'm interested in this sport.
It's dangerous, don't go.
Then in case of danger I'll stop.
Oh yeah?
Then use the Norwegian system.
When you see danger
close your eyes and...
Okay, when I see danger
I close my eyes and...
Thank you. Thanks a lot.
Bye bye.
Professor!
What in heaven's name have you done?
- Nothing, I wanted to ski...
- But why? I told you!
- Enough of such nonsense. Promise?
- Promise.
You see?
It's just a scratch. I'm fine.
Fine? You risked killing yourself!
Now try to get better
as soon as possible and rest.
- I'll keep you company, shall I?
- Yes.
Giacomo, remember that night
in your house?
I don't know why, but I immediately
took a great liking to you.
Master, be cautious...
I'll go now, Giacomo.
My friends are waiting.
But I'll come back soon to see you.
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
Don't move!
Ouch, ouch, I feel so bad!
I feel like my body
is in pieces, but...
...I'm so happy!
- Calm down, professor.
- I'm so happy!
- Or the fever will rise again.
- And what do I care?
And what do I care?
- Your mistress?
- In her room. She's coming.
- So we're off. Are you happy?
- No, I'm not.
Why?
The mistress won't return to Milan
for another three weeks.
So what?
So, when I arrive, my Alfredo
will be already gone for training.
- Alfredo?
- Don't you know him?
Alfredo Martinelli, a great champion.
No, no, he's my fiancé.
Here he is.
- Hello? Yes, one moment.
- Who's on the phone?
- It's Mr. Banti, he'd like to see you.
- Tell him I'll be down immediately.
My mistress
will come down immediately.
- Bob, are we going?
- Sure.
My picture!
Would you mind? That song...
I copied it.
I told my heart not to love,
I told my heart not...
I wrote it very clearly
so that you can read it easily.
Thanks.
- Allow me to accompany you.
- No, I hate goodbyes at the station
after two wonderful weeks
spent together. Thank you.
Moreover, we're not parting forever!
Get well soon, professor.
No more nonsense
and no more athletic experiments.
Got it?
I've asked Bob to look after you.
Right, Bob?
- Yes.
- Oh, well. Let's go.
See you soon, professor.
See you soon.
- See you soon, Bob.
- See you very soon, dear.
No, stop! Don't get cold.
See you soon.
- Goodbye, Dora.
- See you in Milan!
Miss Sandri! Miss Sandri!
- My song.
- Oh, thank you. Sorry.
Goodbye.
- Goodbye, Emilia.
- Goodbye.
I told my heart not to love...
Dear professor...
- You consider me a friend, do you?
- Certainly.
I care for you, very much!
Because I pity you very much.
You pity me?
You see, professor...
It's very hard to talk sometimes!
Listen... Shall we sit?
Let's sit for a moment,
so we can talk better. Do you mind?
Take a seat.
- Can I speak frankly and honestly?
- Of course.
It's certainly bad for a gentleman
to talk about certain things,
but I feel it's my duty to warn you.
- Warn me? I don't get it.
- You don't?
Then I'll tell you that Dora...
...is not worthy of us!
- What are you saying?
- I say...
Calm down, sit down.
I'll repeat: Dora loves
neither you nor me.
Do you want proof?
Look at this photograph.
I found it just now, in her room.
YOUR TIGER
What? Do you mean
that between Dora and this...
poor cyclist...
- Yes!
Yes.
Dora is the natural result of the
environment she grew up in, poor girl.
She was orphaned early,
rich and free,
and then the environment
of sports exaltation...
- I'll never believe Dora could have...
- It's the truth, professor.
My word of honour!
Perhaps you doubt my word of honour?
No.
Poor Jack!
It's painful, I know.
But could I leave you
in your illusion of love?
No, you're right, you had to warn me.
Listen to me, try to forget her.
I will do.
Unless you want to compete...
with the handsome cyclist.
But that would be absurd.
- Bye, Jack.
- Bye, Bob.
Master, let's go home.
Lady Agata is furious.
Let's go back home.
- Yes, pay the bill and pack up.
- Okay.
Excuse me, please,
can you change 50 cents?
50 cents change!
Thank you.
THE FORTUNE TELLER.
REVEALS YOUR FUTURE. CONSULT IT.
"Do not relinquish
the woman you love..."
"...but fight for her."
"In love, the winner is
the one who fights."
"Bet on 14-28-35."
All done, let's go.
Yes, but to Milan.
How strange, I don't see my friends.
They're always here.
- Antonio...
- What?
There.
- Look who's here! Buy us drinks, huh!
- Carlo, I was expecting you.
Take a seat, professor.
Read a newspaper, have an orange soda.
I'll be right back.
An orange soda
and a newspaper, please.
Guys, you've got to help me.
It's about this...
I'm not jealous, because
I attach no importance to women.
And then, my girlfriend
doesn't look at anybody else.
What do you want? Go away.
She is so sweet, so loving.
I tell you,
she's even boring at times!
What's with that guy with the beard?
He's been staring at me for an hour.
I don't know him.
You don't know her?
She's a beautiful girl.
So, I'll take care of
the registration, and you...
- It's agreed.
- Bye.
- Come master, it's all settled.
- Have you signed me up?
- Yes.
- Good.
- Emilia!
- Good morning, professor.
How is...
- How are you?
- Fine, thank you.
You no longer visit us, how come?
I am very...
- Goodbye, Emilia.
- Goodbye.
Here I am, dear.
- Who was he?
- A friend of my mistress.
- Are you jealous?
- Of that fellow there? God forbid!
- But I warn you, if I catch you...
- Catch what!
You know me, darling.
Hello? Professor Banti.
Not there?
Strange, he's always out...
Don't enter! What do you want?
- Are you in a bad mood?
- No, why?
- Have you any plans for Sunday?
- Not yet.
By chance,
I had some extraordinary news.
I want to take you
to an incredible show.
- You'll enjoy it.
- Okay.
Where is Banti? He must sign here!
Where is Banti?
So, have you got it?
- Here are the nails.
- Shut up, you idiot!
- How many?
- Five kg.
Go.
So, after the 5th kilometre,
you sprint, determined and fast...
Cycling events, in addition
to their undeniable sporting value,
present a very interesting side
in terms of folklore and tourism.
- Are you Banti?
- Yes.
Come on, they've been waiting for you
for half an hour!
- Are you Banti?
- Yes.
At last!
Martinelli, good luck!
- What are you doing? Go behind!
- Who is he?
On your marks!
Ready...!
Quick, professor, stay strong
for the first 5 km!
Come on, professor!
- You're not allowed!
- You can't follow!
Let's go, Bob.
I'm not enjoying myself at all here.
We arrived late, but be patient.
You'll enjoy yourself at the arrival.
Come on!
What a disaster! Come on!
Slow down or you'll kill yourself!
Carlo, it's your turn now!
Come on, sir! Insist!
Attention! There's been another fall
of the whole group!
Excuse me, I'd like a glass
of orange juice with a little ice...
- One for me!
- For me!
I'm so hot
and there's nothing left there.
- Are you hot?
- Yes.
Thank you.
- Here, professor, drink.
- Thanks, Antonio.
- Why do they keep falling?
- Shush!
Don't worry about it.
Just keep to the left,
on the bad side of the road.
- I hope to arrive in the leading group.
- I hope so too.
- Anyway, quick, get your check stamp.
- Yes.
Please, would you stamp me?
Come on, professor!
Keep on the bad side of the road!
Attention!
Many cyclists have punctured.
These many incidents
are really inexplicable.
- Nails!
- Have you seen?
It was the guy with the beard!
- Hurry!
- Come on!
Come on!
- "Beardy"...
- Quick, there's a train!
"Beardy", tell me, you've had
someone throw the nails, right?
Ah, you know nothing about it?
Not even about whole groups falling?
You crook!
When we arrive
I'll tear out your beard!
I don't talk to thugs like you!
Thugs like me?!
You're the one with the stupid face!
This is too much!
An accident has forced
our champion Martinelli out of the race.
The perpetrator of the unjustified
attack has been identified.
A so-called Professor Banti has been...
Only two minutes, ma'am.
It's against the rules.
Professor... Giacomo, what does it mean?
What have you done?
Nothing. I wanted
to participate in a bicycle race.
- But why?
- Please, don't force me to speak.
Stop it with this tone,
I want you to tell me.
Do you?
Just one name...
- Alfredo.
- Alfredo?
- Yes.
- The two minutes are over, ma'am.
I'm leaving.
I want you to tell me, we must meet.
- Miss...
- Here I am.
I've taken care of everything,
you'll be released in an hour.
As soon as you're free
come to my place.
I'll wait for you this evening.
Dear professor,
how did it come into your mind?
Who's this Alfredo, a rival?
So what?
In love, woe to show yourself jealous!
A rival...
Nonsense.
Nonsense!
I've seen many, here,
who have ruined themselves for women.
Some cheated, some killed,
some ran away with the cash...
But a man who runs
in a bicycle race for a woman
and what's more with a beard...
honestly, it has never happened before.
Let me give you some fatherly advice:
be happy and carefree!
Think of your health,
don't be so sad!
And shave off that beard.
Shave off that beard!
In prison now! My nephew in prison!
This is too much, enough!
Good, Antonio, I was waiting for you.
Give me 2,000 lire,
I must do some shopping.
But I don't have a penny.
Lady Agata phoned, she's furious.
She said that if I don't
go back immediately, I'm fired.
As for you,
she won't even hear your name.
Listen to me,
let's leave immediately.
Later.
First I must have a talk
which is very important to me.
Let me go, I'll come to you tomorrow.
If he sees me, he'll raise hell.
I don't care about him!
I'm paying you well for information.
So, are they celebrating
this wretched wedding or not?
Listen, do you want the truth?
It seems to me that my mistress
isn't going to marry Mr. Bob, for now.
Tell me why you did that dirty trick
or I'll smash your face!
Who paid you?
I only know there's a woman
between you and "Beardy."
What's up?
Oh God, Alfredo, did you fall?
You ask? You're the cause of it all!
- Me?
- Don't act all innocent!
God, Alfredo,
I swear I don't understand!
- Why didn't you tell me?
- What?
That Banti was your lover.
- My lover?
- Yes, Carlo told me.
Listen, I've seen him twice in my life.
But with a woman like you...
...twice is too many!
- My God, what do I have to hear!?
I told my heart not to love...
I told my heart not to dream...
because I always thought that love
only was but vanity.
But from the day I saw you...
now I know what love can be...
It is pure magic, I love you so...
and I tell my heart: you gotta love.
Dora, let's go,
or we'll lose the 2nd act too.
No, let's wait a little longer.
He called, he'll soon be here.
You'll see.
He's not quite of our world,
he's a little shy, somewhat extravagant,
but after all, he's so nice.
- Miss!
- What is it?
Professor Banti is here.
Hello, Dora!
Good evening.
Good evening.
- Professor Banti.
- Professor Banti... No... Jack!
My pleasure.
Carletto, have you got a light?
Your English mixture is very good.
A little sweet, but delicious.
Thank you. What a guy!
The evening he came to us...
he was drunk. I was teetotal
and he was determined to make me drink.
Carletto, Carletto...
Pardon me.
- Well, well' go to the theatre, Dora.
- Good evening.
Goodbye.
Well, what happened?
Nothing! I'm happy and carefree.
- So, who's this Alfredo?
- Alfredo...
Nonsense.
But from the day I saw you,
now I know what love can be...
It is pure magic, I love you so,
and I tell my heart: you gotta love.
Ma'am, on the phone, quick.
Long distance.
Professor, did you like the trick?
What trick?
The phone call.
I made it up myself. It isn't true.
I made it up to be alone with you.
But tell me,
why do you love me so much?
- Me?
- Yes... but I love you too, you know?
When do you want us to meet?
Tomorrow? At your place?
You know it all! Rascal!
Am I disturbing you?
- Dora, please don't think that...
- It's useless!
I'd have never imagined you'd seek
the woman of your dreams in the kitchen!
- It's so poetical!
- But Dora, I...
- Bob! I'm very glad you're here now.
- Why?
- Maybe you've won the bet.
- How?
The professor wants to leave, Emilia.
Professor, be strong.
Well, shall we leave?
Listen, just go ahead,
I cannot leave this city.
I wouldn't feel good at home.
I feel I now hate flowers, books,
Aunt Agata...
...cod liver oil.
- But what will you do, master?
- You've been spoilt...
- Here.
For me? Thank you.
You've never known
the value of money.
Don't delude yourself.
Your Aunt won't send you a penny.
I will work,
I will use my intellectual patrimony.
- Here.
- Thank you.
Be careful, master,
you'll have to leave the hotel.
Believe me, you will end up badly.
Even if I have to leave the hotel now,
I'll come back here.
Don't forget I have my qualifications.
A man of my culture
will never fall to the bottom.
Don't forget I have my qualifications.
I will use my intellectual patrimony.
I will work.
- Sir, let's go back home.
- No.
My God, there's Dora!
Come on, hurry!
You've caused 3,000 lire of damage.
You are criminals and I'm firing you!
Even if I have to leave the hotel now,
I'll come back here.
A man of my culture
will never fall to the bottom.
Hey, professor!
Can you tell me why men like women?
Chef, 30 guests for tomorrow.
The Sandri-Huerta wedding.
What the hell are you doing?
Who was it?
Idiot! Can't you see
that you've ruined a set?
Who put this idiot in my way?
Nothing but disasters with
these ignorant and illiterate morons
who don't even know how to move!
- Dora, hurry up, Bob is impatient.
- Really?
Tell Bob to be very calm,
he's not my husband yet!
Oh, thank you, Anna.
- How beautiful she is!
- Lovely!
Dear Dora,
you are the image of happiness.
Psychologist!
Don't lose heart like that, professor.
But rather get paid well
for the work you do.
Why should I pay? Yesterday's
Latin translation was all wrong.
What a shame!
The teacher said
it was full of mistakes!
- Okay, I'll pay just the same.
- Master, I'll get the breakfast.
- Was it wrong?
- Yeah.
Actually, I was rather doubtful
about that ablative.
That's a nice discovery!
Vittorio, I've told you many times
not to stop and chat on the street!
Oh, Mr. Giacomo! God, how...
How strange that we meet on the day
the mistress is getting married.
At 1pm, didn't you know?
And you don't know whom
she's going to marry...
Prince Huerta.
I mean, you don't know
what kind of villain she's marrying!
I know someone who has documents
that could send him to jail right away!
- Oh, did you know Alfredo left me?
- What?
He left me.
Dear professor,
men are inconstant in love.
- But what documents?
- Some false bills of exchange...
Emilia, let's go! Dad doesn't want you
to stop and talk to men on the street!
- I'm coming, dear.
- Wait. Who has those documents?
A loan shark, Mr. Rossi.
Via San Marco, 1.
Here's the breakfast, sir.
- Via San Marco, 1.
- Yes.
But what's wrong with him?
Eh, what manners!
Apologies.
Via San Marco, 1.
- That'll be 2.10.
- I've no money!
- What?
- Wait here.
Listen to him!
"I've no money, wait here!"
All morning at the parking lot
for 2.10!
Listen!
I'm talking to you!
Hey, concierge, that flat hasn't got
another way out by any chance?
No.
- Sure?
- Yes.
Good, otherwise, those 2.10...
Listen, Mr. loan shark...
Is it you who has Prince Huerta's
false bills of exchange?
How long do I have to wait?
If he comes down, I'll show him!
He'll get a taste of my jack!
Mr Rossi, I need them.
I really need them!
I give you my word of honour
that this evening you'll be paid.
Dear sir, they are false,
but to me they're worth 600,000 lire.
If you pay me this sum now,
I have no problem in...
- Quick, to the church!
- Pay, first!
- I'll pay you later.
- No, now!
- What's going on, master?
- Good, Antonio!
Look, I leave you my butler
as hostage.
What butler, what hostage!
Don't be funny. You'd better pay!
One moment, the photograph.
Master...
...let's go back home!
THE END
- Good morning, professor.
- Good morning, Antonio.
The light is still on.
You were up late again last night.
"The spirit is willing,
but the flesh is tired".
These are Petrarch's words, you know?
Antonio...
With imagination, I sometimes see
perfection in the woman... of my dreams,
the woman I write about,
the one of a time gone by.
Do such women still exist?
Certainly!
But with them,
it is difficult to write poetry.
- Giacomo, good morning.
- Am I not right, Antonio?
- Why, dear, already awake?
- Good morning, Aunt Agata.
- Why, dear, already up?
- Yes, not long since.
You must have worked late last night.
You strain yourself too much!
If I wasn't here to take care of you...
Take your good cod liver oil.
- Pardon me, ma'am, milk first.
- No, no! Oil first.
- The young master prefers milk first.
- I said oil first!
- Giacomo!
- Yes, Aunt Agata.
- Do not get too much sun!
- Don't worry, Aunt.
Don't wear yourself out
and be back by five o'clock,
no later!
You see Antonio, to be happy
all I need are my books, my flowers,
some money of my own
and never to have met dear Aunt Agata.
I understand perfectly, professor.
- Goodbye.
- Good catch.
- And I beg you, be cautious.
- Yes, goodbye.
- Good morning, professor.
- Good morning, Giuseppe.
"In vain, oh woman,
I long to find you."
"Are you on land, sea, or in heaven?"
"To meet you, alas, I wish."
Giuseppe, a fish!
This is sheer madness!
What can you say in your defence?
Only a criminal could...
- My apologies, miss.
- I didn't mean to fall on top of you.
- I'm sorry, sir... sir?
- Professor Giacomo Banti.
- Dora Sandri.
- I...
I regret having spoken
not very polite words, but...
- Shall we get out of the water?
- Gladly.
Listen,
will you help me find a dry dress?
Certainly, but I wouldn't know
where to find it.
- Is your house near?
- Yes.
- Then you'll give me one of your wife's.
- I have no wife, but...
- Perhaps, Aunt Agata's.
- Very well!
- Lady Agata...
- Yes?
- The young master... come, quick!
- Oh God, what is it?
Giacomo! Oh God, you drowned?
Dear Aunt Agata,
let me introduce you...
- Look at yourself!
- Dear Aunt Agata...
How did you get into such a state?
Antonio, hurry!
It's my fault.
It was a minor accident.
My name is Dora Sandri.
I'm sorry to disturb you so, but...
the professor insisted
so much that...
I... I thought...
I thought...
- The lady certainly needs to change.
- I'll take care of that, very gladly!
In the meantime, you go to your room,
go to bed and try to sweat.
Antonio, a cup of hot
chamomile tea, quick!
Come, master.
You, miss, come with me.
You'll choose a dress you like.
- What a character, Miss Sandri!
- Do you know her?
Everybody knows her!
Magazines keep publishing
photos of her. This week too.
Many millions. Millions, and sports.
You better keep quiet
until she stays.
- Is she staying?
- For dinner only.
Lady Agata had no choice
but to ask her.
- Antonio...
- Sir?
My black suit.
Have you gone mad?
Do you want to get sick?
- Back to your bedroom.
- But, Aunt...
Back to your bedroom, and sweat!
Here I am!
You're wearing the dress
of our poor Clara, Giacomo's mother?
- Maybe I did wrong?
- Not at all.
- How come you're up already?
- Real foolishness!
Please, miss.
Yet, you should go back
to your room and try to sweat.
I don't need to sweat, I feel great.
I can stay, can't I?
- Antonio!
- Yes, ma'am?
Lay an extra place
for the young master.
- Oh! Is there a child here?
- Why?
I recognized
the horrible bottle of cod liver oil.
It's for Giacomo!
- You will find it ridiculous...
- No, I'm just a little surprised,
but I think that, after the oil,
you'll take a good cocktail too.
Cocktail? God forbid, never!
No alcohol!
Did you see a woman
descending by parachute?
I said, did you see a woman
descending by parachute?
- And a bar descending by parachute?
- Come on, he doesn't get a thing.
- No women, no bars!
- Let's go!
I owe you an explanation.
I fell from the sky for a bet.
- For a bet?
- Yes, with my friend, Prince Huerta.
We've always made bets.
Before, just for fun,
and now, to get married.
- To get married?
- Yes.
You'll find all this terribly immoral,
but I do it so, as a sport.
- A sport?
- Yes.
A sport...
Poor Bob!
I'll marry him only if he wins a bet,
but I do all I can
to keep the danger far away.
- Did you seen a woman jump from a plane?
- No women here.
Come Bob, let's go.
I shall go.
I'm sorry I can't wait for your friends,
but it's late. I must go.
Goodnight, and thank you very much.
You're welcome, miss, and goodnight.
I can't stand it anymore.
Please give me a cigarette.
I wish I could, but I don't...
- You don't smoke?
- No.
Let's go into the garden.
What a magnificent greenhouse!
- Orchids! How beautiful!
- This is a very rare specimen.
So rare that I dare say it's unique.
- It's the flower I cherish the most.
- What a pity!
It would look so good
on this dress...
Please, no!
Thanks, but why, professor?
Because it pleased you.
What a perfect gentleman!
Professor, you don't drink,
you don't smoke...
Tell me, does this life as a hermit
make you happy, although among flowers?
Yes, I'm happy.
And have you ever thought
how nice it would be
if you had next to you a young,
pretty, affectionate woman
who'd be in love with you?
- No.
- No?
But I'm sure that
the day you find love,
you'll be happy to fall into it.
- Do you think?
No, we haven't seen anyone here.
- Shall we go to the villa down there?
- If you want...
Professor Banti's villa?
It's useless, you know? Good evening.
- Let's have a drink, I'm thirsty.
- What a great idea!
How wonderful! And tell me,
have you read all those books?
Not only have I read them,
but I've also studied them carefully.
- And do you play the piano?
- No...
Don't lie to me, Banti,
I know you compose.
I saw some notes on the piano...
Come on, let me hear something.
I'm expert enough,
and I'll be a very severe judge.
No, you see, Miss Sandri...
- I don't like the music you prefer.
- What?
- Yes, I'm sure you love jazz.
- Why, don't you like it?
- I'm sorry, but I don't.
- Really?
At least to me, jazz is not music.
True music must express
what nature tells us,
the poetry of the mountains.
- Oh, how nice!
It must harmonize the increasingly
strange melodies of the lake...
How wonderful!
- Enhance our purest feelings!
- Cute!
- And the soul needs to rise...
- What soft fur!
Oh, sorry, Mr. Giacomo.
It's Bob! What a pity.
Oh, Dora, here I am!
- Still in one piece? Nothing is missing?
- No.
- At last!
- Thank goodness we've found you!
We've been looking for you for 4 hours!
Tell us, what happened?
The wind made me fall in water,
but Mr. Banti saved me,
risking his life.
Muchas gracias.
Prince Huerta, Popi Carli...
Giacomo Scotti...
Not Giacomo, Dora!
I'm Jack, simply Jack!
- Carletto Sabatini.
- It's a pleasure.
You see? You lost the bet.
Yes, dear, but eventually I will win.
The stakes are too good.
- But Dora, what are you wearing?
- It's funny, but it's Aunt Agata's.
- Aunt Agata? So we can drink then!
- Silence, please.
Aunt Agata is sleeping,
don't make any noise. Come with me.
- Fine, in silence.
- We just want to drink.
Tell me about it!
- Please...
- I just want to drink.
- Be polite.
- As long as we drink.
- I don't think there is any liquor here.
- In a house like this? Just imagine!
- Some cognac?
- I'll find it now!
Antonio, the gentlemen would like...
but do we have some...?
Leave it, I'll deal with Tony.
Come on!
- Remember, strong stuff!
- Popi, you go to the cellar with Tony.
- Where is the dining room?
- Here.
- And what's there?
- The studio.
Let's go!
Professor, I'm dismayed.
- It's my fault, right?
- No, miss.
Maybe you didn't expect such a fuss.
Yes, it's not very usual for me.
Our life here is so quiet.
- And what do you think of Bob?
- Bob?
Very elegant ... and...
Do you love him?
What are you saying? Love!
It's he who is set to marry me.
Cherries...
This and this...
Cognac! Bueno!
You don't love him
and you let him marry you?
They are two distinct things.
Moreover, I haven't decided anything yet.
Perhaps, on a day of disappointment,
if I don't have anything better...
Bob is decorative, he loves sports...
- He loves sports?
- Yes.
- Like you?
- Like me.
Dora!
- Have you found something?
- I haven't found anything.
No wonder...
Oh, some cherries!
Tomorrow you'll go back to your life
with your flowers, your books...
...and you'll forget me.
- No, don't say that.
I hope to see you again soon.
Oh, New Year's Eve!
Where will you spend it?
I don't know. Here, I presume.
Listen, if I write to you,
will you join us?
We'll go to the mountains.
I assure you, it's such good fun!
- I bet you'll forget.
- I accept, I'm sure I'll win.
- Here. Cheers to Dora!
- Thanks.
Don't you drink?
I should be offended...
- I cannot.
- Why?
I've never drunk liquor,
I might get sick.
- No!
- Oh yes.
- This drink must be devilish.
- Devilish!
Take my advice, professor, drink!
NEW YEAR'S EVE, 1938
- That's enough.
- Are you satisfied? Did you eat well?
- Oh, sure!
- Then give me a kiss.
- No, I gotta go.
- Why?
Because, if my mistress comes,
she'll raise hell.
Don't worry, when she's out with Mr. Bob,
she always comes back home late.
Why, is that monkey
still running after her?
Monkey!
- To begin with, Bob is a handsome guy.
- What, maybe you like him?
- Alfredo...
- I bet he kissed you.
Don't start being jealous again.
Please.
I've told you so many times!
It's bad for you to be a teetotal,
and it's bad for you to be always
covered in the dust of those books.
Come in my two-seater at 140 kph,
and the dust will vanish!
Yes, the dust will vanish!
Hello?
Give me that artichoke, I'll eat it!
- Whoops!
- Bravo!
- Whoops!
- Bravo!
- Professor, you must drink.
- Don't abuse of his hospitality.
Right! Thanksgiving!
And we thank the professor...
for champagne and cognac.
And we thank the professor...
And we thank the professor...
...and goodnight to the musicians.
The light's gone?
The professor makes savings!
Now they'll stop making noise
and will go away.
Let's hope so.
Dora, dear,
be good and let's go home.
I promise that we'll go at 150 kph
and be home in half an hour.
No, Miss Sandri.
I find it unwise that
you go away with... at this time...
Sorry...
There is room for everyone
here at home. Right?
- But Lady Agata...
- There is room for everyone, right?
The gentlemen could stay
until morning.
Good idea, professor. I accept.
Approved unanimously.
Thank you, Giacomo... Mr. Giacomo.
Goodnight, dear.
See you tomorrow.
Goodnight.
Bye, Jack. You're Jack, like me!
Bye, Tony.
Goodnight, Giacomo,
and remember New Year's Eve.
But I'll see you again tomorrow,
I always get up early.
- Oh, really? See you tomorrow then.
- See you tomorrow.
I told my heart not to love...
I told my heart not to dream...
because I always thought that love...
only was but vanity.
But from the day I saw you...
now I know what love can be...
It is pure magic...
I love you so...
and I tell my heart: you gotta love.
Master...
Is the young lady up?
Miss Sandri left a few hours ago.
- But what time is it?
- 12 o'clock.
Why didn't you wake me up?
I cannot trust anyone in this house!
- Didn't she leave a message for me?
- Yes.
I must repeat these words of hers:
"Do not forget New Year's Eve".
Hello, my boy, how are you?
You're better, right?
You can be happy now, they are all gone.
The hubbub is over!
- Enough!
- What's the matter?
I don't want to be treated
like a child anymore!
- But my boy...
- I am a man!
- Who's laughing?
- Nobody's laughing!
- Antonio!
- I? I swear I'm not!
Dear Prince,
do you intend to pay, or not?
- Listen, my dear friend...
- I'm no longer your dear friend!
Pay! Or I'll make you understand
once and for all
that endorsements on bills
of exchange must be authentic.
Be reasonable.
You well know
I'm going to marry Miss Sandri.
You've said that too many times,
I no longer believe it.
- This time it's true, word of honour.
- Word of honour...
I give you two months, after which...
Fix the date?
Why, have I lost a bet, maybe?
That's not the point.
But there is much talk
about our marriage in society.
An old aristocrat good friend of mine
asked me the date. He must leave,
and he really needs to know.
Oh, the poor old Marquis!
I think he can go twice around
the world, and still be in time.
It would be really annoying, though.
- Hello, Dora.
- Popi!
Will you take a nice snapshot of me?
I really need one.
DO NOT FORGET NEW YEAR'S EVE.
MARGHERITA HUT, MONTE ROSA.
HOW TO BECOME A MAN IN 8 WEEKS
Another mysterious parcel.
What can it be?
Let's open it, ma'am.
Stop! Don't touch that parcel!
Don't touch this parcel.
I need it for the congress.
What congress?
I told you, at the end of the month
I must go to Rome.
- Just during the New Year holidays?
- Yes.
- Antonio, he wants to go to Rome!
- I'm afraid ma'am...
5th WEEK
6th WEEK
7th WEEK
8th WEEK
- Please, ma'am.
- Antonio!
Him again!
- Antonio!
- What now?
"Make a test, and no one will resist"
"the strength of your muscles."
- Has the master called?
- Yes, have you shut the door?
- Yes.
- Don't move.
Picture 35.
Here, 200 lire for you...
And forgive me, huh?
Nothing?
Obviously, the system is wrong.
Sorry again, so sorry! And please,
do not say anything to my aunt.
It's wrong.
- What did he want?
- Do not ask me, ma'am.
It's terrible. My poor professor!
- What have you got there?
- Do not ask.
I must know, I am his trustee,
I have to look after him!
- Giacomo...
- Tell me.
- Giacomo...
- What?
- Nothing?
- Nothing.
Bye, Auntie! Bye.
He smokes too now!
It's over... it's over.
It's over!
WATCH OUT, DRIVING SCHOOL
Not my fault!
I wanted to steer to the right...
Good morning!
Please, I want a first...
- A first class for the Margherita hut.
- For the Margherita hut?
Yes, in the Aosta Valley.
You must get off
at Pont-Saint-Martin.
- Pont-Saint-Martin?
- Yes.
Then give me a first for
Pont-Saint-Martin and one for Rome.
Right away, sir.
Thank you, doctor, you reassured me.
But it will be very difficult to
persuade him to go to the mountains.
- Antonio!
- It's him!
Go away! If he finds you here,
he might have a nervous breakdown!
- Giacomo, dear, I want to talk to you.
- What do you want, Aunt?
Listen...
You absolutely must not go
to that congress in Rome.
Not to go?
Don't make me laugh!
Listen carefully, Aunt Agata,
my decision is irrevocable.
"I'd rather break, than bend".
I dare say: "Rome or death"!
But you're tired!
I want what is best for you.
- In Rome, with so many people...
- I'm leaving!
- You'll fall sick! You must not...
- I'm leaving!
In short, don't forget that I'm the owner
of this house and you shan't go!
But I've trained.
I've studied for 8 weeks
for this congress! And you say...
- I must leave and I'm leaving!
- I'm saying this for your own good.
Listen, Giacomo...
Will you listen to what I'm saying?
You've mentioned your money too often!
But remember,
nothing will keep me from going!
Moreover, I have a ticket already.
You mustn't go to Rome. For your health,
you must go to the mountains.
- To the mountains?
- Yes.
Alright.
Antonio will immediately go
and buy a ticket for you.
No need, Aunt. I already have one!
- Enough, stop it!
- It's almost midnight.
- Dora...
- Give me a cigarette.
The new year starts
in a few minutes.
For the last time this year,
I'm asking you:
when do we get married?
For the last time this year,
I'm telling you I don't know yet.
You don't want me to believe
you're thinking of Professor Jack, huh?
- And what if I was?
- I would kill him.
Attention, guys!
I think there's one minute left!
They've already given
the first signal at the refuge!
How silly!
I bet he's in his mansion now,
in his slippers and dressing gown...
And celebrating the New Year
with Dante and Aunt Agata.
Drinking cherry syrup.
Attention! Another red rocket!
They're lighting the fireworks!
- He won't come, want to bet?
- Okay, let's bet.
- The usual stakes?
- Sure.
Bueno. But mind you,
this time I'll win!
It's midnight!
Hurray!
- Me too, guys!
- Me too!
I'm so happy!
Here he is!
Bravo, here he is!
We'll give you a drink now
to warm you up.
- Oh, Banti!
- As you see, I kept my promise.
- And you lost.
- Obviously.
Happy New Year, professor. I'm so happy.
But why did you come so late?
- I walked all the way here.
- You walked! How brave!
- To the New Year, professor.
- Thanks.
- Happy New Year, Bob.
- Happy New Year.
Happy New Year, Popi.
- Happy New Year, Jack.
- Happy New Year, Dora.
Happy New Year everybody!
Happy New Year.
Professor, you've joined us.
Bravo!
Jack, nice guy, you drink too, huh?
Do you like it? English Mixture.
Very sweet! It's mixed with honey.
Up here in the mountains,
up here near the sky,
close to your lover,
your heart melts.
Up here in all this snow,
life is more peaceful,
youth is light,
the heart beats harder!
Bravo, professor!
END OF PART ONE
PART TWO
- Dora, vamos!
- Here I am!
Professor, what are you doing?
I'm coming... I'm coming with you
down to the valley.
Want to break your neck?
God forbid!
You come with the cable car.
Meet you at noon, at the hotel.
Bye bye!
Bye bye!
Do you really want to go
down to the valley on skis?
- Yes, they all do.
- Don't do it. It's difficult.
If I don't start, I'll never learn.
I'm interested in this sport.
It's dangerous, don't go.
Then in case of danger I'll stop.
Oh yeah?
Then use the Norwegian system.
When you see danger
close your eyes and...
Okay, when I see danger
I close my eyes and...
Thank you. Thanks a lot.
Bye bye.
Professor!
What in heaven's name have you done?
- Nothing, I wanted to ski...
- But why? I told you!
- Enough of such nonsense. Promise?
- Promise.
You see?
It's just a scratch. I'm fine.
Fine? You risked killing yourself!
Now try to get better
as soon as possible and rest.
- I'll keep you company, shall I?
- Yes.
Giacomo, remember that night
in your house?
I don't know why, but I immediately
took a great liking to you.
Master, be cautious...
I'll go now, Giacomo.
My friends are waiting.
But I'll come back soon to see you.
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
Don't move!
Ouch, ouch, I feel so bad!
I feel like my body
is in pieces, but...
...I'm so happy!
- Calm down, professor.
- I'm so happy!
- Or the fever will rise again.
- And what do I care?
And what do I care?
- Your mistress?
- In her room. She's coming.
- So we're off. Are you happy?
- No, I'm not.
Why?
The mistress won't return to Milan
for another three weeks.
So what?
So, when I arrive, my Alfredo
will be already gone for training.
- Alfredo?
- Don't you know him?
Alfredo Martinelli, a great champion.
No, no, he's my fiancé.
Here he is.
- Hello? Yes, one moment.
- Who's on the phone?
- It's Mr. Banti, he'd like to see you.
- Tell him I'll be down immediately.
My mistress
will come down immediately.
- Bob, are we going?
- Sure.
My picture!
Would you mind? That song...
I copied it.
I told my heart not to love,
I told my heart not...
I wrote it very clearly
so that you can read it easily.
Thanks.
- Allow me to accompany you.
- No, I hate goodbyes at the station
after two wonderful weeks
spent together. Thank you.
Moreover, we're not parting forever!
Get well soon, professor.
No more nonsense
and no more athletic experiments.
Got it?
I've asked Bob to look after you.
Right, Bob?
- Yes.
- Oh, well. Let's go.
See you soon, professor.
See you soon.
- See you soon, Bob.
- See you very soon, dear.
No, stop! Don't get cold.
See you soon.
- Goodbye, Dora.
- See you in Milan!
Miss Sandri! Miss Sandri!
- My song.
- Oh, thank you. Sorry.
Goodbye.
- Goodbye, Emilia.
- Goodbye.
I told my heart not to love...
Dear professor...
- You consider me a friend, do you?
- Certainly.
I care for you, very much!
Because I pity you very much.
You pity me?
You see, professor...
It's very hard to talk sometimes!
Listen... Shall we sit?
Let's sit for a moment,
so we can talk better. Do you mind?
Take a seat.
- Can I speak frankly and honestly?
- Of course.
It's certainly bad for a gentleman
to talk about certain things,
but I feel it's my duty to warn you.
- Warn me? I don't get it.
- You don't?
Then I'll tell you that Dora...
...is not worthy of us!
- What are you saying?
- I say...
Calm down, sit down.
I'll repeat: Dora loves
neither you nor me.
Do you want proof?
Look at this photograph.
I found it just now, in her room.
YOUR TIGER
What? Do you mean
that between Dora and this...
poor cyclist...
- Yes!
Yes.
Dora is the natural result of the
environment she grew up in, poor girl.
She was orphaned early,
rich and free,
and then the environment
of sports exaltation...
- I'll never believe Dora could have...
- It's the truth, professor.
My word of honour!
Perhaps you doubt my word of honour?
No.
Poor Jack!
It's painful, I know.
But could I leave you
in your illusion of love?
No, you're right, you had to warn me.
Listen to me, try to forget her.
I will do.
Unless you want to compete...
with the handsome cyclist.
But that would be absurd.
- Bye, Jack.
- Bye, Bob.
Master, let's go home.
Lady Agata is furious.
Let's go back home.
- Yes, pay the bill and pack up.
- Okay.
Excuse me, please,
can you change 50 cents?
50 cents change!
Thank you.
THE FORTUNE TELLER.
REVEALS YOUR FUTURE. CONSULT IT.
"Do not relinquish
the woman you love..."
"...but fight for her."
"In love, the winner is
the one who fights."
"Bet on 14-28-35."
All done, let's go.
Yes, but to Milan.
How strange, I don't see my friends.
They're always here.
- Antonio...
- What?
There.
- Look who's here! Buy us drinks, huh!
- Carlo, I was expecting you.
Take a seat, professor.
Read a newspaper, have an orange soda.
I'll be right back.
An orange soda
and a newspaper, please.
Guys, you've got to help me.
It's about this...
I'm not jealous, because
I attach no importance to women.
And then, my girlfriend
doesn't look at anybody else.
What do you want? Go away.
She is so sweet, so loving.
I tell you,
she's even boring at times!
What's with that guy with the beard?
He's been staring at me for an hour.
I don't know him.
You don't know her?
She's a beautiful girl.
So, I'll take care of
the registration, and you...
- It's agreed.
- Bye.
- Come master, it's all settled.
- Have you signed me up?
- Yes.
- Good.
- Emilia!
- Good morning, professor.
How is...
- How are you?
- Fine, thank you.
You no longer visit us, how come?
I am very...
- Goodbye, Emilia.
- Goodbye.
Here I am, dear.
- Who was he?
- A friend of my mistress.
- Are you jealous?
- Of that fellow there? God forbid!
- But I warn you, if I catch you...
- Catch what!
You know me, darling.
Hello? Professor Banti.
Not there?
Strange, he's always out...
Don't enter! What do you want?
- Are you in a bad mood?
- No, why?
- Have you any plans for Sunday?
- Not yet.
By chance,
I had some extraordinary news.
I want to take you
to an incredible show.
- You'll enjoy it.
- Okay.
Where is Banti? He must sign here!
Where is Banti?
So, have you got it?
- Here are the nails.
- Shut up, you idiot!
- How many?
- Five kg.
Go.
So, after the 5th kilometre,
you sprint, determined and fast...
Cycling events, in addition
to their undeniable sporting value,
present a very interesting side
in terms of folklore and tourism.
- Are you Banti?
- Yes.
Come on, they've been waiting for you
for half an hour!
- Are you Banti?
- Yes.
At last!
Martinelli, good luck!
- What are you doing? Go behind!
- Who is he?
On your marks!
Ready...!
Quick, professor, stay strong
for the first 5 km!
Come on, professor!
- You're not allowed!
- You can't follow!
Let's go, Bob.
I'm not enjoying myself at all here.
We arrived late, but be patient.
You'll enjoy yourself at the arrival.
Come on!
What a disaster! Come on!
Slow down or you'll kill yourself!
Carlo, it's your turn now!
Come on, sir! Insist!
Attention! There's been another fall
of the whole group!
Excuse me, I'd like a glass
of orange juice with a little ice...
- One for me!
- For me!
I'm so hot
and there's nothing left there.
- Are you hot?
- Yes.
Thank you.
- Here, professor, drink.
- Thanks, Antonio.
- Why do they keep falling?
- Shush!
Don't worry about it.
Just keep to the left,
on the bad side of the road.
- I hope to arrive in the leading group.
- I hope so too.
- Anyway, quick, get your check stamp.
- Yes.
Please, would you stamp me?
Come on, professor!
Keep on the bad side of the road!
Attention!
Many cyclists have punctured.
These many incidents
are really inexplicable.
- Nails!
- Have you seen?
It was the guy with the beard!
- Hurry!
- Come on!
Come on!
- "Beardy"...
- Quick, there's a train!
"Beardy", tell me, you've had
someone throw the nails, right?
Ah, you know nothing about it?
Not even about whole groups falling?
You crook!
When we arrive
I'll tear out your beard!
I don't talk to thugs like you!
Thugs like me?!
You're the one with the stupid face!
This is too much!
An accident has forced
our champion Martinelli out of the race.
The perpetrator of the unjustified
attack has been identified.
A so-called Professor Banti has been...
Only two minutes, ma'am.
It's against the rules.
Professor... Giacomo, what does it mean?
What have you done?
Nothing. I wanted
to participate in a bicycle race.
- But why?
- Please, don't force me to speak.
Stop it with this tone,
I want you to tell me.
Do you?
Just one name...
- Alfredo.
- Alfredo?
- Yes.
- The two minutes are over, ma'am.
I'm leaving.
I want you to tell me, we must meet.
- Miss...
- Here I am.
I've taken care of everything,
you'll be released in an hour.
As soon as you're free
come to my place.
I'll wait for you this evening.
Dear professor,
how did it come into your mind?
Who's this Alfredo, a rival?
So what?
In love, woe to show yourself jealous!
A rival...
Nonsense.
Nonsense!
I've seen many, here,
who have ruined themselves for women.
Some cheated, some killed,
some ran away with the cash...
But a man who runs
in a bicycle race for a woman
and what's more with a beard...
honestly, it has never happened before.
Let me give you some fatherly advice:
be happy and carefree!
Think of your health,
don't be so sad!
And shave off that beard.
Shave off that beard!
In prison now! My nephew in prison!
This is too much, enough!
Good, Antonio, I was waiting for you.
Give me 2,000 lire,
I must do some shopping.
But I don't have a penny.
Lady Agata phoned, she's furious.
She said that if I don't
go back immediately, I'm fired.
As for you,
she won't even hear your name.
Listen to me,
let's leave immediately.
Later.
First I must have a talk
which is very important to me.
Let me go, I'll come to you tomorrow.
If he sees me, he'll raise hell.
I don't care about him!
I'm paying you well for information.
So, are they celebrating
this wretched wedding or not?
Listen, do you want the truth?
It seems to me that my mistress
isn't going to marry Mr. Bob, for now.
Tell me why you did that dirty trick
or I'll smash your face!
Who paid you?
I only know there's a woman
between you and "Beardy."
What's up?
Oh God, Alfredo, did you fall?
You ask? You're the cause of it all!
- Me?
- Don't act all innocent!
God, Alfredo,
I swear I don't understand!
- Why didn't you tell me?
- What?
That Banti was your lover.
- My lover?
- Yes, Carlo told me.
Listen, I've seen him twice in my life.
But with a woman like you...
...twice is too many!
- My God, what do I have to hear!?
I told my heart not to love...
I told my heart not to dream...
because I always thought that love
only was but vanity.
But from the day I saw you...
now I know what love can be...
It is pure magic, I love you so...
and I tell my heart: you gotta love.
Dora, let's go,
or we'll lose the 2nd act too.
No, let's wait a little longer.
He called, he'll soon be here.
You'll see.
He's not quite of our world,
he's a little shy, somewhat extravagant,
but after all, he's so nice.
- Miss!
- What is it?
Professor Banti is here.
Hello, Dora!
Good evening.
Good evening.
- Professor Banti.
- Professor Banti... No... Jack!
My pleasure.
Carletto, have you got a light?
Your English mixture is very good.
A little sweet, but delicious.
Thank you. What a guy!
The evening he came to us...
he was drunk. I was teetotal
and he was determined to make me drink.
Carletto, Carletto...
Pardon me.
- Well, well' go to the theatre, Dora.
- Good evening.
Goodbye.
Well, what happened?
Nothing! I'm happy and carefree.
- So, who's this Alfredo?
- Alfredo...
Nonsense.
But from the day I saw you,
now I know what love can be...
It is pure magic, I love you so,
and I tell my heart: you gotta love.
Ma'am, on the phone, quick.
Long distance.
Professor, did you like the trick?
What trick?
The phone call.
I made it up myself. It isn't true.
I made it up to be alone with you.
But tell me,
why do you love me so much?
- Me?
- Yes... but I love you too, you know?
When do you want us to meet?
Tomorrow? At your place?
You know it all! Rascal!
Am I disturbing you?
- Dora, please don't think that...
- It's useless!
I'd have never imagined you'd seek
the woman of your dreams in the kitchen!
- It's so poetical!
- But Dora, I...
- Bob! I'm very glad you're here now.
- Why?
- Maybe you've won the bet.
- How?
The professor wants to leave, Emilia.
Professor, be strong.
Well, shall we leave?
Listen, just go ahead,
I cannot leave this city.
I wouldn't feel good at home.
I feel I now hate flowers, books,
Aunt Agata...
...cod liver oil.
- But what will you do, master?
- You've been spoilt...
- Here.
For me? Thank you.
You've never known
the value of money.
Don't delude yourself.
Your Aunt won't send you a penny.
I will work,
I will use my intellectual patrimony.
- Here.
- Thank you.
Be careful, master,
you'll have to leave the hotel.
Believe me, you will end up badly.
Even if I have to leave the hotel now,
I'll come back here.
Don't forget I have my qualifications.
A man of my culture
will never fall to the bottom.
Don't forget I have my qualifications.
I will use my intellectual patrimony.
I will work.
- Sir, let's go back home.
- No.
My God, there's Dora!
Come on, hurry!
You've caused 3,000 lire of damage.
You are criminals and I'm firing you!
Even if I have to leave the hotel now,
I'll come back here.
A man of my culture
will never fall to the bottom.
Hey, professor!
Can you tell me why men like women?
Chef, 30 guests for tomorrow.
The Sandri-Huerta wedding.
What the hell are you doing?
Who was it?
Idiot! Can't you see
that you've ruined a set?
Who put this idiot in my way?
Nothing but disasters with
these ignorant and illiterate morons
who don't even know how to move!
- Dora, hurry up, Bob is impatient.
- Really?
Tell Bob to be very calm,
he's not my husband yet!
Oh, thank you, Anna.
- How beautiful she is!
- Lovely!
Dear Dora,
you are the image of happiness.
Psychologist!
Don't lose heart like that, professor.
But rather get paid well
for the work you do.
Why should I pay? Yesterday's
Latin translation was all wrong.
What a shame!
The teacher said
it was full of mistakes!
- Okay, I'll pay just the same.
- Master, I'll get the breakfast.
- Was it wrong?
- Yeah.
Actually, I was rather doubtful
about that ablative.
That's a nice discovery!
Vittorio, I've told you many times
not to stop and chat on the street!
Oh, Mr. Giacomo! God, how...
How strange that we meet on the day
the mistress is getting married.
At 1pm, didn't you know?
And you don't know whom
she's going to marry...
Prince Huerta.
I mean, you don't know
what kind of villain she's marrying!
I know someone who has documents
that could send him to jail right away!
- Oh, did you know Alfredo left me?
- What?
He left me.
Dear professor,
men are inconstant in love.
- But what documents?
- Some false bills of exchange...
Emilia, let's go! Dad doesn't want you
to stop and talk to men on the street!
- I'm coming, dear.
- Wait. Who has those documents?
A loan shark, Mr. Rossi.
Via San Marco, 1.
Here's the breakfast, sir.
- Via San Marco, 1.
- Yes.
But what's wrong with him?
Eh, what manners!
Apologies.
Via San Marco, 1.
- That'll be 2.10.
- I've no money!
- What?
- Wait here.
Listen to him!
"I've no money, wait here!"
All morning at the parking lot
for 2.10!
Listen!
I'm talking to you!
Hey, concierge, that flat hasn't got
another way out by any chance?
No.
- Sure?
- Yes.
Good, otherwise, those 2.10...
Listen, Mr. loan shark...
Is it you who has Prince Huerta's
false bills of exchange?
How long do I have to wait?
If he comes down, I'll show him!
He'll get a taste of my jack!
Mr Rossi, I need them.
I really need them!
I give you my word of honour
that this evening you'll be paid.
Dear sir, they are false,
but to me they're worth 600,000 lire.
If you pay me this sum now,
I have no problem in...
- Quick, to the church!
- Pay, first!
- I'll pay you later.
- No, now!
- What's going on, master?
- Good, Antonio!
Look, I leave you my butler
as hostage.
What butler, what hostage!
Don't be funny. You'd better pay!
One moment, the photograph.
Master...
...let's go back home!
THE END