Tarzan in Manhattan (1989) - full transcript

Cheetah!

Cheetah.

Next time, I'll let the
crocodiles have you for lunch.

You hear me?

You listen to me now.

Cheetah, watch your language.

Whatever he says,
I'm sure he's right!

Cheetah!

Joseph.

I scared the hell out of you,
didn't I?

Come on! Admit it!



Nothing scares Tarzan.

Listen to this one.
"Nothing scares Tarzan".

I can't stay long. I've
got to open up the store.

Just thought I'd drop
off a couple of books.

You're going to
like the Kipling.

And the St.
Vincent is very thick.

Thank you, Joseph.

Hey,
why don't you come for dinner tonight?

Plantains au gratin. Yeah?

Bring Cheetah.

I'll bring a fish.

Hey. You take these
back to the treehouse.

And stay out of trouble.

Keep your head down.



Careful, they will hear us.

This way. Follow me.

Kala!

No! Kala!

No.

Mama!

The books.

Cheetah.

Talu nala.

You like it?

He's my favorite one.

Good, good. Thank you.

Thank you.

I wait for this a long time.

Come back again soon, hear?

Come back tomorrow.

Plantains, eh?

Joseph.

You're early.

They killed Kala
and took Cheetah.

I think to New York.

What?! Who!?

I don't know. I found this.

Bete Noire.

I must find Cheetah
and punish Kala's killers.

How do I get there?!
How do I get to New York?

New York, nah. Forget it.

This must be done
with or without your help.

New York?

New York!

Passport. Ticket.

I don't know how
far it will get you,

but it was the best I could
find on such short notice.

Thank you, Joseph.

You got any money?

I've got something
better than money.

Well, like the song says,

"Give my regards to Broadway."

You can still change your mind.

No. I must go, Joseph.

Okay, but remember,

You're going to be up against
something stronger than poison toads.

More cunning than killer snakes.

And fiercer than Simba,
the Lion.

What is that?

New Yorkers.

New Yorkers.

This is as far as I can go.

I didn't want to break
this to you before,

but you can't take the knife.

Won't I need it against the New Yorkers,
Joseph?

Yes, but they won't let
you take it on the plane.

Goodbye, Joseph.

Now,
don't you go and get civilized on me.

Eastern flight 100 non-stop
service from Atlanta,

Now arriving at Gate 8.

Those passengers whose
connected from Africa

in Atlanta should proceed
to the immigration desk.

Poor Cheetah.

Next.

That means you, mister.

Passport, please.

No problem.

Problem.

Where are you taking me?

We're thinking of The Plaza.

What are we going to do?

Who is this guy?

Wow! Look at that!

You hear that yell?

Yeah, you'd yell, too,
if you fell into that crap.

Hey! Hey!

Get a job!

Even for New York,
that's a new one.

Where to?

Here.

La Bete Noire?

Hey, ya. They have a dress code.

What does that mean?

Serious?

Sometimes, but my friend,
Joseph told me I have a sense of humor.

I like a man with
a sense of humor.

So, um, so's what do you do?

Circus? Acting?

Politics?

I don't do anything,
I just... am.

Philosopher.

We're off to La Bete Noire,
Plato.

Tarzan.

What about this dress code?

They won't let you in
without a jacket and tie.

Speaking of which,
and I don't like to get personal, but, uh,

But you got a wallet in there?

No, why?

Just idle curiosity about how
you were going to pay me.

Oh, I understand.

Will this be enough?

You kidding? It's good
enough anywhere on this planet.

You want me to swing by a men's
store on the way to the restaurant?

Yes, but, must I wear trousers?

Not on my account.

He has wheels on his feet!

Oh,
this is going to be so much fun!

Follow that horse.

All my life,
I've waited for a line like this.

Hold onto your loincloth,
it's going to get breezy in here.

Slow, slow.

Bahndo, bahndo.

Easy.

Anyway,
I'm glad he was able to stop the horse.

Thank you!

My name is Jane Porter. I'm 26 years old,
single.

Closest relationship
lasted two months.

I'm always the
one that calls it off.

I have a masters in
computer science from NYU

and my dad thinks I'm
wasting my life driving a cab.

So, who in the world are you?

I'm Tarzan of The Apes.

You did tell me that,
didn't you?

My father's name was John.

My mother's name was Alice,

The lord and lady Greystoke.

Lord and lady Greystoke?!

That's royalty, isn't it?

I don't know.

Yeah, with classy accents

and called each other "ship"
when they talked to them, right?

Ship?

You know, your lordship,
your ladyship, that kind of stuff.

I don't remember.

Sorry.

Come on.

Here we go.

Now, after the plane crashed,
the apes raised you?

Mainly Kala. The hunters killed
her and took my friend, Cheetah.

And then,
you learned to speak "ape"?

And also the languages of Numa,
the Lion,

Dango the Hyena and Doodle,
the hippopotumus.

Why do I believe all this?

Because I'm
telling you the truth.

I'm Tarzan of The Apes.

Mr. Tarzan. In what
might we interest you?

We accept all major credit cards,
as well as three of the more obscure ones.

Why don't you show
him your family jewels?

I beg your pardon.

Forget the jewels,
I got the plastic.

The salesman was
right. This is you.

Not your brand, sir?

Can anyone take those?

Only people who dine here.

Well,
have you seen a chimpanzee in here?

Fortunately not.

Have a nice day.

A chimpanzee?

My friend, Cheetah.

You never told me
it was a chimpanzee.

The matches I found in the jeep

belong to the same man who took
Cheetah and killed my ape mother.

Let me see those.

It means nothing.

Just look around, everyone in
New York must carry these matches.

Listen,
listen. My old man was cop.

So I picked up a lot of highly
sophisticated investigative techniques.

Like reading the inside
cover of matchbooks.

What do the numbers mean?

It's a phone number.

I dial it,
we find something out. Simple.

Let's go back to my place,
we'll phone from there.

Besides, you haven't stopped
since you left the jungle.

You must be bushed.

Bushed?

Tired. Zonked. Exhausted.

You can crash at my place.

Crash?

It isn't a palace,
but it's home sweet home.

I love you, baby.

When are you going to be mine,
huh?

You didn't tell me you were going out with,
uh,

Hulk Hogan.

No,
my name is Tarzan of The Apes.

Yeah? Well, I'm Juan Lipshitz.

Confused product of the star-crossed
marriage of two mis-matched individuals.

And these.

These are my apes.

Nice shirt.

If I give you to my dog,
Brutus, he'll rip your guts out.

Well, don't give the order.

If. I just said if.

Jeez.

Man,
let's get outta here. Vamenous.

Yeah, let's go.

You just made one big fool out
of Juan in front of his buddies.

I don't think he's
going to like that.

Eh, still busy.

Why did you stay in the jungle?

It's my home.

What about your family,
back in England.

Family?

You know,
people who could give you shelter.

Food to eat.

Shoulders to cry on.

Well, that's what the apes did.

Wait a second.

Brightmore Foundation. One moment,
please.

You can forget about the
number on your matches.

Why?

That number was The
Brightmore Foundation.

Cheetah must be there!

I doubt it.

It's the most famous philanthropic
organization in the country.

They do charitable stuff.

You know, build hospitals.

Give money to, you know, I don't know,
places that need money, that kind of thing.

Good guys. Understand?

Yes.

I'm sorry.

It probably wasn't even
a New York area code.

Is there anything that
you haven't told me?

Anything that could help?

This is from the killer's cigar.

Great. That narrows it down.

Look,
I'm going to grab a quick shower

and then we'll figure out
a way to find Cheetah.

I'm not very good at waiting,
Jane.

Then get some rest.

Couch isn't too lumpy.

Don't answer the
phone because it will do

that all by itself.

And don't get the door.

The remote for the
TV and everything else.

Remote?

Hello, this is Jane Porter.

I can't come to the
phone right now.

Dad, if it's you,
yes, I'm alright.

Jane?

I'm a grown woman. Quit
calling to see if I'm alright.

If it's someone else,
please leave a message at the tone.

Jane. It's your father.

Don't get fresh with me,
even on tape.

Where the hell are you?

Oh, excuse the "hell".

I'm across the street
and I'm comin' up.

Jane!

Jane!

I know you're in there!

Jane!

I told you not to move into
a crummy neighborhood!

Jane!

Are you alright?!

Freeze!

Freeze?

Hey! Put on some clothes,
you pervert!

What are you doing?!

Where's my daughter!? Jane!

Jane?!

Jane! Jane!

Dad!

What's going on
here?! Are you alright!?

Dad!

That's another door you owe me,
Dad.

Don't get fresh!

Who is he?!

What's he doing here?!

Tarzan, meet my father,
Archie Porter.

Wait a minute! The
name's Archimedes to you.

And this is Tarzan,
Lord of The Apes.

Get him off the furniture,
please.

That's all you know
about this current weirdo?

He's not a current weirdo.

Ah, I see.

He's just, uh,
Tarzan of The Apes,

who escaped from
a detention center

and is looking for his lost chimp,
Chiquita.

Cheetah.

Ah, I see.

I never interfere in your personal life,
do I?

Since when?

Yeah, but I'm telling you,
this guy is a loser.

Hey, come here for a minute.

You got 24 hours to
get out of town. That's it.

Wait a minute,
Dad. You can't do that.

Why can't I do that?

I run a business;
a security business.

I could lose my license.

This guy is a
fugitive from justice.

And also a nutcase.

I gotta go. It was great coffee.

A pleasure meeting you.

Get out of my daughter's life.

And put on some clothes.

Get rid of him
and marry a doctor!

I must go find my friend.

No-no-no. Don't
go out there tonight.

It's a jungle.

Look, first thing in the morning,
we'll figure out something.

I promise to help you,
and I will.

Great perils have this beauty,

that they bring to light
the fraternity of strangers.

Wow. That was so poetic.

Oh,
I read it once in a book by Victor Hugo.

Les Miserables.

Oh, yeah? Well, I knew that.

Look, um,
we'd better call it a night.

You can... You can
sleep on the fold out bed.

Oh, I can't do that.

Oh, I understand.

I need to sleep outside on the platform
outside the edge of your building.

Well, whatever.

Hey, where's the dude?

Get outta here!

The dude is here.

Hey, that bat was autographed.

Well, now you've got two.

Give me your weapons.

The rest are yours.

You mean you're
not going to kill us?

Tarzan only kills
when he needs to.

Alright,
you're going to call the cops, right?

Wrong. Just get outta here.

Consider us gone.

Thank you.

Don't you worry. You'll be safe.

Bon apetit, girls.

Notice the big space
in-between the words?

Just big enough
for "and daughter".

Well, why isn't it there?

I can't be Daddy's
little girl all my life.

It's too easy.

Well,
I learned in the jungle that sometimes

the easy way is the best way,
Jane.

Well, this isn't the same jungle,
Tarzan.

See that mat? I
wired that for him.

Jane! That thing drives me nuts!

I know.

Hey, jungle man.

I gave you 24 hours to get out of town,
didn't I?

Ho-ho-hold it,
Dad. Wait a minute.

You'd be reading about me in
the papers if it wasn't for Tarzan.

What are you talking about?

He saved my life.

Huh?

He fought of 6, maybe 7 guys.

You've got to be kidding.

They had knives,
pop. And an attack dog.

You know, I hate this city.

I hate this office and I hate you,
jungle man!

But I appreciate what
you've done for my daughter.

It means a lot for me,
it really does.

Give me five.

Five?

Oh, please.

You've got to be kidding.

Alright, I'll tell you what.

To show you my appreciation,
I'm going to take you both out to lunch.

My treat. Good?

Great. Thanks, Harry.

Nothing tastes as
good as a hot dog.

You eat dogs in America?

That's it. Get him outta
here. He's embarrassing me.

I don't care if he
did save your life.

It's not a dog. They
just call it a "dog".

It's actually a cow.

Now that we've established the source
of the cuisine, can we move along?

I'll pay you on Saturday, Harry.

Maybe.

What's happening with Chiquita?

Cheetah.

Alright,
Cheetah. What's happening with Cheetah?

Nothing.

All we have were the matches,
the cigar band and phone number.

It's a dead end.

Why?

Come on,
Dad. The Brightmore Foundation?

Come on, give me a break.

If I've learned
anything as a cop,

you're guilty until
you're proven innocent.

I mean,
that's what basically works.

Would you tell me I'm adopted.
Please tell me I'm adopted.

In the jungle,
when you see an animal's footprint

and you smell the spore nearby,

then the animal must be there.

No matter what you think,
even if it's not supposed to be.

Alright, well there's a lot of spore
in this city, you can be sure of that.

So you think the Brightmore
Foundation is involved?

I think Archie is right.

Archimedes.

Archimedes is right.

You know,
I'm getting to like jungle man here.

He thinks the way I do.

You know,
I'll tell you something.

When this is all over with, why don't you
and I take in a ball game or something?

That's male bonding.

It's very touching,
but can we get back to the problem?

How can we check out
the Brightmore Foundation?

Easy, Brightmore,
or "B.B." as his friends call him,

has a beautiful little
pad up the Hudson.

I say we go up and sniff it out.

By the time we get there,
everyone will be asleep.

I guess they have insomnia.

Why is that man
dressed like a banana?

Rich people can dress
any way they want.

It's a costume party.

Classy. Even the
caterers are dressed up.

Maybe if we had costumes,
we could get in and look around.

Bingo. We're
purchasing costumes.

Ah, my darling. What a
lovely evening for a soiree.

Oh, excuse me, sir.

But, uh, B.B. was a darling,
but he forgot to send us the invitation.

Muffy's going to be here,
but Buffy isn't here.

But what I thought
we could possibly do is

a simple thing like a,

Let me give you this little gratuity,
okay?

And hopefully, heh-heh-heh.

Take your clothes off.

Robin Leech, eat your heart out.

Who's that man?

That's Brightmore.
Brightmore Foundation.

I-I smell something.

Don't look at me. I
think you smell money.

Come on.

I don't think she knows
how to work undercover.

If by some unfortunate circumstance
you've come with someone,

tell him goodbye.

So, uh, so you come here often?

Actually, I live here.

Nice.

Modestly adequate.

Later I'll take you for
a walk on the grounds.

I have plants that I've
collected from all over the world.

It looks like Jane is going
to be tied up for awhile.

Let me look around. Come on.

The big apple.

You have the most
sensuous mouth.

So do you.

At midnight,

there are fireworks.

Ooh! I love fireworks.

What is it?

Haven't you ever seen
high society in action before?

What's wrong? Afraid of heights?

I was just remembering.

When I was little,
people dressed up.

Dancing, and music.

In the jungle?

Before the jungle.

Animals.

What?

I can smell them.

Smell what? Animals?

In there. In there.

What?

It's locked.

Jane! Psst!

That was good, honey.

The jungle man says
there are animals in there.

Animals.

I smell death.

A minute ago,
he smelled animals.

Here's the alarm.

Now give me a second,
I can bypass it.

You know, all that money I spent on
her education was certainly worth it.

Do you know what you're doing?

Yes.

An alarm is nothing
but a closed system,

and I can violate that as long as it
doesn't know it isn't being violated.

It has to feed the
infomation to itself.

I beg your pardon,
what are you saying?

I think she is saying...

I know what she is saying.

That the machine is
now talking to itself.

I understand everything
she told me about the

Violating.

Everything. You ready?

Yes.

The door's still locked.

The door.

It's locked.

The door.

Yeah, now what do we do?

Wa-wa-wait. Where are you going?

You know, he's a little weird.

Where is he going? What is it?

You know, I gotta admit.

This guy's a notch above
your other boyfriends.

Gross.

Animals.

Live animals!

There!

Can't he walk through a
door just like everybody else?

Come on.

Eh, I may be crazy,
but I think I'm gonna use the drainpipe.

I'm going, too.

No, you stay here.

Before,
we were just looking around.

Now, it's breaking and entering.

And the idea is
not to get caught.

And the way we don't get caught
is we have them look the other way.

That's your job. You make
them look the other way.

We'll meet at the entrance at,
uh, 23:00 sharp.

Take care.

Inside this wall.

But there's no door.

Wait, wait.

Let my fingers do the walking.

Okay, which way?

I don't know.

What do you mean? You
could smell it from the house.

It seems to be coming from
everywhere. It's too strong.

You go that way.

Rohaunu?

Cheetah!

Cheetah, I found you!

Archie, this is Cheetah!

Archimedes.

Cheetah, this is Archimedes.

Chiquita.

Come on.

There they are! Get 'em!

Nice work, jungle man.

You dropped something.

That's my ID.

Nice picture.

Jeez!

Let's go!

Check it out.

Well,
that takes care of one hot limo.

Now, let's get a doctor.

Are you kidding?

We've broken into Brightmore's,
we vandalized his place,

we shoot a couple of guards,
we steal his limo,

and muscleman
here is an illegal alien.

Alright, so what do we do?!

We take out the bullet.

Very smart.

I think the knife is ready.

I'll tell you when
the knife is ready.

Do you have any Harisha
from the Forest of The Skree,

to smear on the wound?

We ran out. But I've got a
little iodine and a little spit.

I've taken out hundreds of
bullets in my life. Not to worry.

Ready?

It's alright.

We're going to crash.

Mama.

We're going to crash.

Everything's going to be fine,
Johnny.

Be a brave lad.

You have to be, little man.

Jane?

Oh, you're awake.

I'm,
I'm sorry. I touched the pearls.

I just... wanted to try them on.

They were my mother's.

All the pearls were on
the ground after the crash.

I put them back together again.

They looked beautiful on you.

Thank you.

Chiquita.

Good morning.

Come here. Join me.

Sit down.

Here. Here's the machine.

Enjoy yourself.

Anything you want to watch.

Go ahead.

Some popcorn?

How about some raisins?

There you go. Save me some.

There.

This, uh, this sure is cozy.

Bizarre, but cozy.

Uh, I deserve this.

I taught her to cook.

Eat up. It's delicious.

Hey, jungle man,
don't breathe too deep. You're gonna choke.

What have the done
with the air here?

Hey, uh, Chiquita,
would you like some eggs and bacon, huh?

Come on,
have some. You'll love it.

But don't report
me to the ASPCA.

I'm only kidding.

What a cute little guy.

Look at him.

Why would anyone
want to lock him up?

What did you see in the lab?

I saw a dead chimp.

With the top of his head cut
off and his brains removed.

That's terrible.

It was horrible.

I have a feeling
we're onto something.

I don't know what,
but I'm going to find out.

Well,
we've got Cheetah. That's what we're after.

Archimedes is right.

We must go back and
save the other animals.

Who said anything
about going back?

Well, they cut the top of one chimp's head,
they'll do it to the others.

I'm going.

You can't. You're hurt.

Look,
we did enough damage for them

to not to mess with any
other animals for awhile.

Think I got an idea.

You know that skyscraper that
belongs to Brightmore downtown?

Yeah.

I have a feeling there may be
some interesting papers there.

That's where I'm going.

Well, how can I help?

Get your clothes on.

Pick up your pot.

Here's the footage right here.

Stop.

Zoom in.

Tighter.

Tighter!

Give me a closeup!

We got it.

Hey, Tarzan!

Relative of yours?

I forgot to tell Brutus that I,
we had a truce.

Now he knows.

You gotta teach me that.

Just think like the animal.

Be with it in mind and spirit
and then don't command.

Just desire.

Make friends with him.

Talk to him in dog language.

Get serious, Tarzan.

I found a building
with a jungle inside.

That's called a florist
shop. They're beautiful.

Oh, you shouldn't have.

Lunch.

I have something for you, too.

Cheetah and I went a second-hand
bookstore on the way home.

"Greystoke - The hereditary
title of the Clayton line,

"going back to the 13th century
and the reign of Henry the Third."

And there's a picture.

Weird. Weird. That's
what I love about it.

Porter's just come out of
the Brightmore Building.

I think it's time he
had an accident.

And make it creative.

Sorry, no one's allowed past...

My father, he's up there.

Here, take him.

Hey, come back here!

Hey,
buddy! You can't go up there!

Ah, gee, Tarzan.

Look after Jane,
will you promise me?

I promise.

And another thing.

You'll be fine, Archimedes.

Keep your clothes on.

Dad. Oh, my God. Dad.

So, is he going to be alright?

It's too early for any definite prognosis,
Miss Porter.

Your father has sustained
a severe head injury.

Is he going to die?

I'm sorry, but in cases where coma is
involved, the outcome is impossible to predict.

If I were you, Miss Porter,
I'd get some rest.

Cheetah, get down.

Listen, now you wait here.

I'm going up to Archie's office,
okay?

Wake up, New York,
it's 6 AM. Time for news.

Hey, remember that bulletin
about a guy in a loincloth?

Yeah.

Think that might be him?

Bad boy, Cheetah!

Come here. Get down.

What's this?

Brightmore?

Good work, Cheetah!

Freeze!

Well, that seems to be a very
popular expression in your city.

That means you, too!

That's a chimp, Henderson.

I read in National Geographic,
they taught them over a hundred signs.

Well, chimps know more than signs,
they speak their own language.

Oh yeah? What? Hungarian?

Well, if I said,

He'd understand me.

Sure. What's your name, buddy?

Well,
my name is Tarzan of The Apes.

Formerly John Clayton the third,
son of Lord and Lady Greystoke.

Yeah, and I'm Han Solo and
this is my sidekick, Chewbacca.

You left the window open again,
Henderson.

Well, you left the keys inside.

So what? Chimps can't drive.

Drive! Drive!

Move over! Let me try!

Jane, we're all real sorry
to hear about your old man.

How is he?

He hasn't regained
consciousness.

If there's anything we can do...

Hey, Holmes,
who taught you how to drive?

Cheetah.

Nice cruiser.

Hey, we'll park it for you.

The doctors just
told me to go home.

Said there was nothing
more that I can do.

I feel so helpless.

Well, I know that feeling.

It was the feeling I had when
I was left alone in the jungle.

So, how did you make it go away?

Time passed. I grew stronger.

So will you.

Does it ever stop hurting?

No.

Cheetah found this
in your father's car.

What is it?

It's film.

What do we do with it?

Get it developed.

Now!

Look at this.

Brightmore's been smuggling
in apes for almost a year.

It's an invoice from Ventnar
labratories for two incubators,

a thousand grams
of nutrient Agar,

and an electro-photometer.

All delivered to
Brightmore's house.

And this is a bill for computerized
homographic scanner.

$1,987,000. Wholesale.

I don't understand.

He spent almost two million
bucks on a CT scanner.

What's that?

They're called "cat scans".

They're for x-raying
cross sections of the brain.

That's what he's doing to the animals.
Something terrible with their brains.

Yeah, look at this. 200 apes are
being shipped to him on the 15th.

That's tomorrow.

He's going to cut
their heads open.

I've got to go there
tonight and stop all this.

No! You could get killed.

Jane, I found a cigar
stub in your father's office.

Just like the one I found in Africa when
Kala was killed and Cheetah was kidnapped.

The man who threw it
away works for Brightmore.

I'm going with you.

It's too dangerous!

I'm doing it for
my dad. I owe him.

In all my life, I never once said,
"I love you, Daddy."

He knows.

I'm going to get Brightmore.

No. I promised your father
I would take care of you.

Take care of me?

Don't you respect me enough to know
I can take damn good care of myself?

Let's go.

State your business.

Tell Prince Charming that
Cinderella has come for her slipper.

That will be all for now, Guido.

Very well, sir.

Good help is such a treasure.

Did you enjoy your meal?

It was delicious.

Why don't we, uh,
take in some videos and sip our drinks?

Before I forget, this is yours.

Aren't you going to
ask me to try it on?

That's only necessary when the prince
doesn't know the identity of Cinderella.

I happen to know yours,
Jane Porter.

How?

There'll be plenty of
time for questions later.

Let's watch some videos.

I've been a hunter for a long time.
Long enough to become quite bored.

What? You run out
of animals to hunt?

Until tonight.

There are two immutable
rules to hunting.

One,
if you wish to capture the lion,

never enter the lion's den.

So, what's two?

My favorite.

Watch the screen.

Number two.

If you want to
capture a wild animal,

know what bait to
use to lure him near.

With you, my dear Jane,

I believe I have
found the perfect bait.

Let's go prepare a
greeting for your friend.

Who the hell are you?

I'm a friend of
Archimedes Porter.

Why did you do it?

Because he saw too much.

Now there's only
one thing left to do.

Nice entrance.

But you just broke
rule number one.

If you hurt Jane.

Threats. Isn't
that a little silly?

I trained them myself.

Perhaps I could show you around.

It's not everyday we get
such an interesting guest.

Excuse us, Jane.

Man talk.

Do you know what I do, Tarzan?

You kill animals.

That's my hobby.

My work is buying minds.

You'd be amazed at how many bio-engineers
are available for the right price.

And the animals?
Why do you need them?

It would be impossible
for someone like you

to understand the scientific
concept behind all this.

Perhaps I explained
in very simple terms?

The air,
the air must be dry in here.

What would happen if I took the
ground up brains of one primate

and fed them to another primate?

The other primate gets sick.

Jungle wit.

Quaint, I love it.

The primate that's fed the brains,
or what we distill from it,

would take on the
smarts of the other chimp.

And that's why you need the
expensive machines with the long names?

For your experiments.

You never fail to amaze me,
ape man.

Of course,
you do understand my predicament.

There aren't any bleeding
hearts that would allow me

to cut the top off a chimp's head and grind
up his brains without causing quite a fuss.

Is there?

We've refined the process.

The process with a little protein
manipulation and gene splicing does work.

And it's going to
be worth millions.

In fact,
billions. Why think small?

All virtually tax free.

If the process works for chimps,
it should work for people, too.

Wealthy people.

In order to do that, we'd have to
enter a whole new phase of research.

Which would mean procuring
live human brain cells.

Just think what the bleeding
hearts would have to say about that.

You would have to kill people.

Exactly.

So, imagine my delight when I discovered
that you and Cinderella were after me.

You both will have the honor
of being the first of many,

shall we say, "volunteers".

Freeze!

It works.

Nobody says...!

Jane, unlock the cages!

Go on! Go, go, go!

Come on!

Try to make footprints.

I know. I know. We're late.

Where did he get those?

From the trophy room.

Good work, Cheetah.

Go on. Go on. Go!

Why didn't he bring the grenade
launcher while he was at it?

This is a side of New
York I've never seen before.

Get on my back.

Alright.

Ape man, one.

Brightmore, nothing.

Hey, boss. Get me down.

Chopper! This is
Brightmore. Do you read me?

Chopper come in!

Chopper to
Brightmore. Affirmative.

I lost their tracks. Locate 'em.

But when you find them,
just put a light on them.

I want that long haired
primate for myself.

Mr. Brightmore. I
think I've spotted them.

Ah,
I knew it was too good to last.

Come on. Let's go!

They're swinging through the trees,
Grid 12-353-1

Quick! Through here!

Grid 13-127-2

Grid 153-1

Chopper to Brightmore.
They shot out my spotlight.

I'm finished. Heading back in.

Take the arrow with
the rock on it and light it.

Now.

Look out!

Jump!

This is for my father.

No!

I want him to have a fair fight.

You know,

best hunt I ever had.

Come on. Let's get outta here.

They told me the animals
would be returned to the jungle.

Good. It's where they belong.

I do, too.

Are you sure?

There's less
fighting in the jungle.

Things are at peace.

That's not what I asked you.

Let's go see your father.

Oh, no!

Why do we fight all the time?!

It was all my fault.

It was all my fault.

OK, no more tears.

Don't get the sheets wet.

They need it for
the next patient.

Archimedes.

Tazan. Chiquita.

Dad?!

Hi.

Dad, I thought you were dead.

No-no-no-no. I thought I was dead,
too, but even in Hell

they don't have
headaches like this.

I love you!

I'm sorry.

Please, it's okay.

Thanks for the ride.

No problem, hombre.

Send us a postcard from Africa.

Right on, man.

It's a little dated,
but you're getting there.

Now that looks great.

How are the animals?

Well, they had to fly cargo.
More of your strange rules.

Joseph is meeting them at home.

Cheetah's got our tickets.

Well, see ya around.

I have something for you, Jane.

The earth ever move while you
swingin' on your vines back home?

Not like that.

Hey.

What does a guy have to
do to get lunch around here?

Dad, I'm not your servant.

I told you after I finished
the sign I'll get you lunch.

Remember when I was dead,
how sweet you were to me?

How kind, how considerate, huh?

How come everything
is now my fault?

I'm sorry, I'm sorry. But I just
can't do everything by myself.

We're backed up on cases,
I've been blow drying the files all night.

The office is in total chaos.

Maybe I could help clean up?

No, you'll miss your plane.

Not so fast.

Uh, jungle man,
I could put a "help wanted" ad in The Post.

Or,
you could stick around for awhile.

I'll give you minimum wage and
all the peanuts Chiquita can eat.

Alright. I'll stay.

The name is Cheetah.