Sweetiee Weds NRI (2017) - full transcript

Sweetie's father wants her daughter to get married to an NRI from England.

Legislative Warning.

When a love affair goes on for very long,
a man's life can become a circus.

Sweety, stop!

- Sweety!
- Stop following me, Aakash!

Sweety, please! I'm sorry, Sweety!

- Sweety! Look, your mums calling you.
- Listen to me, stop!

Please, Sweetie, stop!

- Sweetie, wait for my sake.
- I love you, Sweetie.

I don't want to hear anything!

Go fast, will you!

Sweety, stop!



Catch her, someone catch her!

Stop, Sweety!

I'll hold my ears.

Stop following me!

Sweety!

Stop, Sweety!

No, Sweety! Sweety!

No, Sweety!

Go to hell! I rather kill my self
than be your wife!

Sir? Sir?

What is it?

You're getting missed calls, Sir.

Don't disturb me for missed calls.

Sir, it's a number from abroad.



- From abroad?
- Yes!

Look, DK, in life never ignore 3 things.

1. A call from abroad.

2. Things from UK.

3. Hair fall.

Otherwise you'll have to regret
like Rahul bose.

Catch.

When an average Indian was aspiring
to be an Engineer or Doctor,..

..that's when Bhulabhai wanted to be an NRI!

He reached London, illegally.

The poor guy was caught and then deported.

On his return trip, he swore, what he
couldn't do, his child will do, in the future.

And thus, he fixed the marriage of his
one and only daughter with an NRI.

Good morning, Jasubhai.
So what if it's a new number?

When I saw a number from abroad,
I understood it has to be you.

Hey, what are you doing?
The sofa will get wet.

It's Jasubhai on the phone from London.

Oh goddess, please keep showering your
blessings just like this on my family.

What?

What are you saying?

Bobby ran away with a foreigner?

How is that possible? He was supposed
to marry our Sweety...

What happened to you?

Let him go to hell, our Sweety
will get a hundred boys.

We don't need hundreds, we need just 1 NRI.

Jigna, promise me.

After I die, you will marry Sweetie
to an NRI only.

Don't say that, not now.

Madam, Sir left us.

Noooooooooo!

- *chants shloks*
- Dad!

Hey! Who are you?

Come on, dad! I'm your daughter, Sweety.

LOL!

ROFL!

LMAO...

That fatso says he's my brother in law.

And that old hag claims to be my wife.

And now you say, you're my daughter?

- Oh god!
- LOL! ROFL!

Maa...

Oh, Goddess, what's wrong with him?

Sis, he's gone into shock.

Why? What happened?

That rat, Bobby Mehta, ran away.

Wow! Bobby Mehta ran away?

What? Bobby Mehta ran away?

Aww, that's so sad.

NRI groom, come along...

Doctor, be careful, please.

It's an injection ma'am,
there will be a little pain.

Cool, Jijaji (brother in law) cool.

I was saying, when will he be okay?

In such a case, there's nothing I can say.
May be he'll be okay right away or never.

Oh God, are you saying he'll
be like Ghajni all his life?

Oh mother goddess...

Maa, dad will be okay, don't worry. Okay?

- Can I suggest something?
- Yes, tell me.

Why not try giving him a
high voltage electric shock?

Or we could also try letting mad dogs
behind him to bite him.

What kind of suggestion is this?

See child, like iron cuts iron,..

..similarly, shock will be the
cure for a shock.

No!

Will you always talk about
cutting and biting, Amit?

- Sir is okay.,
- Dad! I love you.

He's okay!

Dad, why do you take so much tension?

Jijaji, you should have told me, I'd get 10
NRI boys to stand for you in minutes.

Why 10? there will be thousands of NRI boys.

All you have to do is upload a photograph.

Where?

Jhat Patt Matrimony dot com.

Did you also get married through it?

I'm trying.

Try, try, try!

No matter how much you try to
hide the truth, Vasudev!

But me, Mathura Naresh Kans!

Will find out the truth!

Now the best is for you too tell
me the truth yourself!

Do you have?

The truth is exactly what you are scared of!

What is your problem!
You ruined the entire rehearsal.

Ruined? This one has ruined my life!

Oh God, yet again the same thing?
That's the end of our rehearsal.!

Really, man!

We could have talked about this later too!

My rehearsal. is on!

No! I want to talk right now! Immediately!

Come on, Sweetie! Why do you always
want to fight during rehearsal. time!

I mean there's hardly any time left for the
show. Why can't you corporate a little.

Corporate? You're talking as if you're
going to win the first prize.

I have seen your plays.

Last time, I was the only one
siting in the audience!

So, shut up!

Why are you fighting with him?

- I'll come.
- Then, let's go!

Come.

Kaaannnss...

No.

My pants will fall off!

Come on! Shut up and sit down.

What have you thought about?

What is there to think about?
See, how God is helping us.

Bobby Mehta ran away himself.

Everyone is not going to
be Bobby Mehta, Aakash!

I'm telling you, we'll seriously
have to do something.

You don't let me talk to my family
and nor are you doing it yourself.

How are we going to get married like this?

Relax! Don't worry.

Bullshit, don't worry!

With tension about getting married to you,
I'll have blood pressure and sugar problems.

You know, that idiotic doctor, gave
dad the idea of a matrimony site!

I'm telling you Aakash, once the profile is
online, we won't be able to do anything.

What do you think, all the NRI's
in the world are waiting,..

..for the Sweety Desai to get her profile
online, and they send a proposal?

The day I get married to someone else,
you'll realize.

How can you just get married to someone else?

I won't let it happen.

I'll hack you away from them like a hacker.

I wish that happens, Aakash.

You don't know, how much I love you.

I know.

But you don't know how much I love you.

1..2..3..4...

5..6..7..8...

1..2..3..4..5..6..7..8...

One more time.

1..2..3..4...

What?

Wedding card.

5..6..7..8...

1..2..3..4..5..6..7..8...

See this, another wedding with an NRI!
That Ankita's wedding.

Jignesh's daughter.

Yeah!

Where is Sweety?

When does she wake up so early?
She's sleeping upstairs.

SWEETY...

Oh shit!

What happened, dad?

What happened about the photo, child?

Dad! It will happen in a few days.

Just a few days.

Nice.

- Dad!
- What about the photo?

It will happen in a few days, Dad.

Sweety?

It will happen in a few days, Dad.
Promise, promise!

Photo.

One or two days and it will be done, Dad.

It's always switched off!

Democracy.

Democracy means,... Everybody...
Every person has the freedom of speech!

Like our Bappi Da sang the song,
' I am a disco Dancer'.

I want to speak to you now!

- Later. Wait for 5 minutes.
- Freedom of Expression...

- He taught us Disco.
- Go, man. Just go.

- No! Now!
- It's in a democracy.

- I'm in a class.
- I want to talk now!

This is called democracy!

Say whatever is in your mind.

Why are you still sitting?

There is a lady standing outside
and you're still siting!

Go! Respect the Lady.

I'll do so after class, Sir.

Why? See I have a responsibility,
I take a salary!

But you! You are free.

Democracy allows you to choose
between class and canteen!

Go! Go, Aakash, go.

Hey! Why are you always getting mad at me?

What will Banarjee sir think of me.

You don’t understand my situation, Aakash.

Dad is stuck with just one question,
morning, evening, night!

What happened about the photo, photo, photo!

What can I do about that?

You can't do anything, right?
Then just click a picture for me.

I'll go give it to dad. Problem solved!

Go to that father of yours and...

I mean, control you Dad for some more time.

Rest I shall handle.

Why do I think you won't?

Now, that's your psychological problem,
I can't help it.

It's not a psychological problem, Aakash,
whenever you say this there is no confidence.

So what should I do? Go to the
college terrace and shout?

What are you doing?

Sweetie Desai, I love you!

What are you doing! Come down.

If I say it softly, you have a problem, loud
and that's a problem! What should I do?

Okay...

Trust me, everything will be okay.

And anyway, if you take so much
tension before the wedding,..

..the wedding may or may not happen, but you
will definitely have sugar and blood pressure.

Stop.

There, Sweety has also come back.

Dad, it will happen in a day or two, okay?

Come here, come here.

It won't happen in a day or two, it's done.

What's done?

The food has walked up to the famished!
He's an international photographer.

Straight from Mumbai.
Courtesy your Amit uncle.

Dad, what is this?

Mom?

What are you doing?
At least let her get ready.

I'll handle it.

Listen! Wait and let her get dressed.

Do this.

Hold that pot.

What?

Put it on your waist.

Like this.

What is this! You don't know anything.

Location change.

A little...

Look there.

That way.

Down.

Should we search for an NRI?

What are you waiting for? Start.

- Correct, Sis?
- Yes.

This is so much fun, Sir.

Yeah. And we were uselessly looking around.

There are so many NRI's on this site.

I can't choose whom to send
Sweety's proposal to.

Kamlesh Mehta. Deepak Parekh.

Sir, do it fast, there is only...

..1 minute left for the auspicious time.

Jijaji, he took 30 secs, there's only 30 left.

2... 2 seconds, that's it.

5... 4...

Done!

It's done.

Congratulations, Sis. Congratulations.

Now see, how NRI boys come and stand in line
at our doorstep for our Sweety.

Hey...

Hey, guys! What's up! What's the plan?

What's wrong? Why that long face?

Has the Principal died?

Her profile is online.

Her profile is online, so what?
Why so much tension?

No, no, you're right. It's bad. You should
do something Aakash. Why aren't you?

Profile is hers, laptop is her dad's.
And website belongs to someone else.

What can I do?

Yeah, yeah, don't do anything at all!
Just sit on your hands.

Guys! We could do one thing.

Sweety, you know the user ID and password?

Yeah, so?

Give me your phone.

Here, put your user name and password in.

Go to settings and change the contact details.

Now, you can manually delete all the mails.
You're problem is solved.

Now, there won't be any mails nor
will your dad talk about it.

Wow! Ruma, I love you!

See it's such a simple idea
and you didn't get it!

Mails have started pouring in.

So fast?

Everyone isn't slow like you are.

Why are you always fighting.
Everything is always a problem.

What should I tell your father, ha?

Namaste, Sir. I'm Aakash Patel, I'm just
an orphan but I love your daughter.

And I want to marry her. Please, please,
please, let me get married to her.

Your father will kick me out of his house.

Go away!

And that fat uncle of yours...

God alone knows what he'll do!

- Jijaji? Jijaji, wait... I'm tired.
- I won! I won!

Wait...

Oh God, I'm tired.

Jijaji...

You lost even today!

Jijaji, you are always fast!

Oh god.

Jigna, has Sweety woken up yet?

Is it the time fro her to
wake up, yet? Correct.

Sis is on mute mode again.

Jigna, get me my laptop.

I'll get it right away.

Let's see if there are any replies.

101% Jijaji! Not one but more
replies must have come.

May you have splenda!

No. Jalebi Faafda. (Gujarati snacks).

I don't want to eat. It's here, it's here.

I hope.

Get it here, Jigna.

User name: Sweetie Desai.

Password: Goddess.

- You were saying there will be a lot of replies.
- Yeah, yeah.

There is not a single one!

Look!

What are you saying?

Oh yeah... Sis, Jijaji, this is as
blank as a blank paper.

But don't worry at all, my heart says
one day there will be a reply!

I'm serious, we'll win one day!

Sis, Hail the Goddess!

She's taken a vow to keep quiet.

It's empty!

It's empty!

What are you saying?

I don't understand.

Only child. So beautiful. Rich dad.

Still no match?

What sort of period is this?

Periods change, son!

Today, Jisbal and Shaurya have
made you violent!

Tomorrow, you will be the doom of yourself!

Mind your language, Sugreem.

Who talks like this to their older brother?
Bad monkey!

LOL! You are the same kind! LOL!

Stop it, guys!

- Oh God!
- What the hell!

- You broke the rhythm! Why?
- I can't take this anymore!

Friends and family don't have to
be around during rehearsals!

Stop sitting here!

Excuse me!

Why!

We ran in the entire city like dogs,
flattering people,..

..and collected money, for this play!

Hey, this is called creativity!

Not everyone can understand it.

It's a fusion of two eras, where
one age of mankind meets another.

You come with me.

Listen, Bro, don't be offended but this play
seems to be a little typical even to me.

At least you don't say that, man.

You are my bro.

Of course I am, that's why you are
always the Hero and I'm the villain.

But until when can we do this stuff?

Something new, let's do
something contemporary.

Where may be I can be the hero.

What happened? Why you laughing?

Sorry to say, but why do you'll do
things that you'll are not good at?

Just go and tell your girlfriend
to Google John Travolta!

- Hollywood casting agents said the same to him.
- He's started again.

But see, see where he is today and
where I will be tomorrow.

- Agreed! You will be a big big star...
- Okay, okay, okay!

Okay, bye. I'm leaving, it's late.
Mom, must have started getting tensed.

Let's go.

Where are you'll going with these tails?

- Bye!
- Bye.

Come on, let's go.

Where have you been? We've been
trying to call for since so long!

I didn't get any call?

Your phone is switched off,
how will you get calls?

Oh shit! When did this die?

Leave that, I have a good news for you.

You know, thanks to goddess, we have
a match for you on the internet.

What?

Yeah! And your dad spoke to them too,
they are coming tomorrow to see you.

Shit!

- What now?
- Huh? nothing.

I'll go change.

This girl, god knows which
world she lives in.

Let her be, I have a lot of work to do.

Urgh! This stupid phone had
to get spoiled today!

Oh god.

All the contacts went with this.

Oh shit! How do I inform Aakash.

- Sweety?
- Coming, maa.

Come to my room, quickly.

Maa?

Yes, child? See this, this one is nice.

It will look very pretty on you,
wear this tomorrow. Final.

Maa, I wanted to tell you something.

- Tell me, what is it?
- Maa, Aakash...

Wow, it's great. Is everything done?

I'm very happy today. Very happy.

I had always thought that my daughter will
get married to the world's best NRI.

Today, God has answered my prayers.

- I'm so happy, so happy.
- Thank you Goddess.

- Dad, dad, I wanted to tell you something.
- Tell me...

Wow, father daughter are talking alone.

Your Uncle did all the hard work
and you forgot him?

No, no, Amit.

Be happy, be happy, my Sweetu.

All I hope is tomorrow everything goes well.

Yeah!

- come, please come.
- Come, come.

I was saying it, no. Come, please come.

Namaste, namaste.

Come, Come.
- Namaste.

- Namaste.
- Come, come.

Come, son, come.

Good, good, sit, sit.

Sit.

Hi, I'm Abhishek Mehta, my dad Ajay Mehta,
my mum, Saloni Mehta.

What.. London you do is?

He means, what do you do in London.

I'm a software engineer.

- Oh okay.
- Good, good, nice.

What payment?

Salary?

London you is get?

You please don't talk in English,
the boy will run away.

Sorry.

Do you also live in London, with him?

No, in the beginning I had gone
along with him.

But I'll tell you something,
Our Gujarat is the best.

Yeah.

My Jijaji, he had also gone to London,
A long time back.

Yeah.

Why? Did you also not like the place?

No, no, I liked the place, I enjoyed a lot.

- But...
- But what?

But...

I'll tell you, the thing is, what happened is..

..Jijaji, had gone to London.

He asked a foreigner where 'Aasha Hall' is.

So his bad luck was that the
man was a police officer.

So he thought that Jijaji was abusing
him in English, Ass...

Understood. They understood.

And my Visa had also expired,
so I came back.

That's when Jijaji decided that his
son in law will definitely be an NRI!

Whatever happened, happened for the best.

But I'll tell you something,
Our Gujarat is the best.

Oh God! Is the mother mute?

No, no.

She has taken a vow to stay quite today.

The doctor has said that for my health
she needs to keep quite once a week.

She was asking why Sweetie hasn't come,
I said, she's coming.

There she is.

Wow, your daughter is very beautiful.

But I'll tell you something,
Our Gujarat is the best.

Okay, so you saw the boy and we saw the girl.

I feel, the boy and girl should
talk to each other.

Yeah, that's right.

Now, when you're going to spend your
lives together, you need to talk.

Go, go, children, go talk.

Go is.

- But I'll tell you something,...
- Our Gujarat is the best.

He's coming on my nerves.

Feeling nervous, isn't it?

No, I'm not nervous.

I wanted to say something to you.

Tell me.

You will have to say no for this wedding.

What?

Actually, I have an affair with someone else.

So why didn't you tell your
parents this earlier?

I know, I tried a lot but I just couldn't.

So, you refuse it.

Say, say that you didn't like the girl.

Why should I say no?

Because we, my boyfriend and
I have done everything.

Everything?

Everything, as in everything.

What's the big deal in that?

All this is justified in love.

And I'm not going to refuse
because of such petty things.

So, you won't refuse?

No.

Please, please, please.

Please, refuse the wedding.
Please, I love him too much.

And I love myself a lot.

Shit.

I requested that ass a lot,
but let's see now what happens.

That dog was just not ready to listen, idiot.

Don't worry, it'll be okay.

What will be okay?

All you do is blabber about
things being okay.

How is it going to be okay? To make things
okay, you're supposed do things!

So what do you want me to do?

You and your family are always
creating new problems.

I told you, I'll speak to them in 2 months,
after the exams, but you don't listen!

You want me to get a time machine?

Even with a time machine,
you won't be able to do anything.

Because for this you don't need
a machine, you need guts.

Which unfortunately you don't have.

Enough, Sweety Desai!

Just because I'm not saying anything
doesn't mean, I don't know how to.

Right. Good.

That's exactly what I expected from you.

Good that I got to know your
true colors in time.

Let's do one thing Aakash Patel,
let's officially break up.

No affair, no love nor any tension!

Seriously man, you guys are fighting like dogs.

That's why I believe in being single because of this.

Me too.

And, by the way!

Keep your rotten 18 carat cheap ring!

Sell it and buy Bourvita for yourself.

Because may be once you drink that
you might just get some guts!

Hello?

Yes, mum?

What?

No, no, I'm not stressed.

Yes, yes, okay mumma, I promise.

I'll try to come soon. Okay?

Okay, bye.

Guys? There's a sad news.

What now?

The guy said no!

Oh my God! That's amazing!

Sweety?

Where are you coming from?

How did you get so late?

I actually went out with my friends.

I told mom.

Oh, no problem.

Go, go, these are your days to have fun.

And what are you doing so late at night?

Just...

Just or are you looking for another guy?

Dad, tell me this, why do you
want to get rid of me?

I don't want to get rid of you, child.

But like every father of the world,
it's my wish..

..to see my daughter married to the best man.

It will happen, dad.
What's all the hurry about?

My course isn't complete as yet.

The course will get over.

But, you know...

You were just a baby and since then,
I have been dreaming about your wedding.

Dad.

What's happening? Oh my god, father and
daughter are having their moments, eh?

Jasubhai, from London.
Yes, Jasubhai, tell me.

Oh no, no, what's the point of saying sorry.

Let it go, forget about what's happened.

It's done now, what can we do.

What?

A match?

But Jasubhai, your son ran away so now?

Oh, your nephew!

- Name, ask his name!
- Name.. What's his name?

Rasiklal!

Rasiklal? Ewww!

What does he do?

No.

In Central London?

Sells pickles?

- Okay, okay.
- The boy is well settled?

Okay, okay, okay! What's there to ask?
Okay, okay, okay!

We found him! We found him!
We found an NRI groom! We found him!

Yayy! Congratulations!

Why don't we kidnap Rasiklal
from the airport?

Have you lost your mind?

But I'm serious, try and understand,
let's kidnap him.

What do I write here?

Wait for two minutes. One problem isn't
solved, you have come with another now!

Hey, so are you saying I'm
creating these problems?

Are you doubting that too?

- Son, come here.
- Yeah.

The situation has gone way out of hand.

We'll have to do something constructive.

Like?

Come here.

No, no, no, are you mad!
What if we get caught?

What did you say? Tell me also!

Wait until tonight, you will know yourself.

What happened? Is there a party at night?

Tell me also!

Who is messaging you so late at night?

It's a promotional mail, dad.

- These marketing people never seem to sleep.
- You're absolutely right!

- They are all mad!
- YES!

What happened?

Sale! There's a huge sale at 'Sequence'.

Okay, go for it.

I love you, Dad!

What happened to her?

- Good morning.
- Good morning, Dad.

Baba, finish your fruits.

Hey!

Yes, yes, yes!

I read the newspaper in the toilet,
not use the laptop!

Hello? Yes, Jai Shri Krishna.
(Greetings).

Huh?

What are you saying? Yes, yes, most welcome.
Please come, please come.

What happened?

Jasubhai is coming with Rasiklal. Next week.

For the engagement.

I'm so happy, I'm so happy!

Give it, give it.

Shree? Shree?

No! No!

You dog, siner! Just leave me alone.

Do not mess with Lalkeshwar!

Anyata! I will kidnap you!

Kidnap, my foot!

You don't have the guts to come home
but such big dialogues you have!

You're back?

Why? Does your father own the amphitheater
that no one else can come here?

Pack up.

What happened?

Did your dad not like the profile I sent?

You're not at all ashamed, are you?

Ashamed? Why should I be ashamed?

What has happened now?

There Jasubhai and Rasiklal have
booked flight tickets!

And you're asking what happened?

So, the matter has reached here?

We'll have to come up with something.

We'll have to think.

See this.

- No, no, this isn't good.
- No?

Hello? Who is this?

Uncle, I'm Rassu.

Rassu?

Oh oh, Rassu, Rasiklal.

Oh Rasik, my son.

Okay, okay, how are you, son?

When the heart is on fire,
nothing is okay, Uncle.

What? Do you have acidity?

Not acidity, Uncle.

There has been an acid attack on
my feelings and hearts desires.

Child, are you okay?

No, uncle. Everything is not okay!

Jassu uncle and you are being unfair to me.

But what did we do?

Uncle, you and Jassu uncle have
choked the happiness I had.

I don't want a bride, I want a groom.

One saree and a pinch of vermilion,
is enough to make me happy, forever.

- But?
- No buts, Uncle.

All you have to do is give me your blessings.

And, if you tell Jassu uncle this,..

..I'll jump into River Thames and kill myself.

Oh Goddess! What happened to you again?

Jigna, promise me, if I die, you will get
Sweety married to a NRI.

Yes, yes, I promise!

But be careful, it shouldn't be that we
are looking for him at the Salon..

..and he comes out of the beauty parlor.

Noooooooooo!

Jijaji?

Jijaji, don't take this gas problem lightly.

- It might be serious.
- Yes!

It's not a problem!

This is happening to me because of tension.

So stop taking so much tension.

DK, get the laptop and show it to him.

No! I don't want to see his damned thing.

You use it.

Give it to me.

Jijaji, what's the user name and password?

Sweety Desai and password is the Goddess.

Jijaji! There is a brilliant boy!

Show me!

Even I want to see.

The boy looks good.

Aakash Patel.

Should we talk to him?

Absolutely, Jijaji.

Why again!

What's the point of the DND if
they don't stop calling?

Give, let me handle it.

Hello?

Yes? yes. Yes, yes,...

Yes, yes, yeah yeah.

Yes, yes, yes...

They are here itself.

Should I get them?

Think it to be done.

Yeah, yeah. Yes, yes,...

Gosh! Do you know who I was talking to?

John Travolta?

Her father, Bhulabhai!

- Is it?
- Yeah!

- Are you serious? Dad saw the profile?
- Yeah!

Aakash! Our plan was successful!

Oh my God!

- Please don't get excited. Wait!
- Why?

Hey, hey! First, at least tell me
what exactly happened?

It happened in front of you.
The world heard it.

Bullshit anyone heard! Yes, yes, yeah yeah..

If you'd say anything other than that,
then we would understand!

No, no, he said two more things.

One was, "they are here itself" and
"I'll Get them".

He asked me, are your parents there?

So I said, they are here itself.

Then he asked, will you get them tomorrow?

So, I said, okay, I'll get them.

Ass! I was roaming around with a time bomb
and now you have set a timer on it.

You'll are sitting like demons on my fate!

Now, where do I get parents from?

No, no, no, no! Can't do!

Please, Sir. Please, Sir. Please, Sir..

You'll don't understand. What you are
doing is wrong. Absolutely wrong.

If we get caught the police will hit us and
make us look like monkeys.

Actually, your basics have a problem.

Why sir?

Miscasting.

- Sir,...
- You'll make a Bengali a Gujarati father?

How?

Booba?

Where there is love there is never miscasting.

So, nothing doing.

No more discussions.

I'm mummy and you are papa, that's it.

Thank you, Ma'am. Thank you so much!

One minute, come here!

Let's go.

Now, we have a family.

Tell me, when do I have to go?

Tomorrow.

Oh God.

Tomorrow?

Stop, stop.

- Jijaji, they are here!
- Yeah?

Come, come.

Come, come, please come.

I'm saying it.

- Welcome, welcome, welcome.
- Namaste.

I'm Bhulabhai Desai.

My wife, Jigna Desai.

You have already met them.

He's my brother in law, Jigna's brother.

- Namaste.
- How do you do?

I always do to you.

Shah Amitt.

Amar.

You should have checked,
that has your actual name.

Please, sit.

- Please have a seat.
- Sit, sit.

- Sit here.
- Go to Uncle, card...

Hey, nice teeth! So white.

Card.

Eat Dhokla, it's a guest server.

- Eat, eat.
- It's famous here.

Thief, thief, thief, thief!

Where is? Where is? Where is?

She is?

DK, what is this? is this how
you behave with guests?

Sir, Sir, I saw him remove money
from Amit Sir's pocket.

What? Money?

Tension not take, I put no
money in my pocket is the.

- You chill.
- Go!

You chill.

So for how long have you been abroad?

From today onwards.

No. He means to say that a long
time before today.

When the Britishers ruled here, his grandad
thought, they'll go live there and rebel.

So, he took the entire family
and went to Britain.

What are you saying?

Which means you are the 4th generation NRI.

Nice, nice.

For how long are you in India?

Just...

We'll have to wait until the exams.

Exam?

Blood. blood exam.

Blood exam?

There is a blood report to be taken, for him.

Why my report?

Poor guy, doesn't know what has happened,
so a blood test is necessary.

God, please don't give anyone a
long term memory loss.

Excuse me?

What you do? In UK... in the?

I'm a journalist.

Wow.

Yes, the boy looks well read.

He understands your English too.

There, even Sweety has come.

This is our daughter, Sweety.

- Sweetie, that's Aakash Patel.
- Namaste.

- His parents.
- Namaste.

- And the younger brother, Prakash.
- Hi.

Sweety, you look beautiful
than you do everyday.

Have you met her before?

No, no, no, no.

He means to say Sweety looks like a Rose.

- Oh, oh, rose.
- Rose.

Oh. Even your son is as good as a rose.

We like the boy.

So, can we take that as a yes?

Yes, yes, absolutely.

Hey, doesn't your wife give you money?

She does, Sir.

- Go faster then!
- Yes, Yes, Sir.

Bhulabhai?

Come, come.

The driver reached the airport
on time, didn't he?

- Yeah, yeah.
- Welcome, welcome.

What is this Bhulabhai? Is this how it is?

- Now, I...
- Welcome, welcome.

Who the is?

Him? He is my nephew.

Rasiklal.

Bhulabhai, see how he's cried and cried and
got his eyes all puffed up.

Rassu

Noooooooo...

Calm down, calm down.

What.. what happened?

No, no, nothing.

Bhulabhai, I'm very angry on you,.

You spoke to us about the match and yet
you fixed the wedding somewhere else?

If you don't accept me,
the world will taunt me..

..I'll die of sadness.

Who will accept me in the world again?

- Where will I go?
- That's it, son, you're going overboard.

This is not how it works,
I have a reputation too.

No, no, Jasubhai, I am a little
confused here now.

If this is Rasiklal, then who
was on the phone?

Phone?

Yeah! He said to me on the phone,
he doesn't want a groom, he wants a bride.

Groom?

- Who are these people now?
- I don't know.

See, Bhulabhai, our enemies don't want
Sweetie to be married in our family.

You know this whole thing is a game plan.

Don't take the tensions.

I the gamer catches.

What did he say?

He did say something.

Where is this boy?

There, he's basking in the sun.

You fool!

- Who is it? Who is it?
- Look here!

Did I spend so much money for you
to come here and relax?

Get out!

Move.

What are you doing?

Hey, you! You... You're sleeping again!

I'm not sleeping, buddy.

So?

I'm thinking.

What?

What are you thinking?

Just,.. that you're such a dog.

Why?

Man, after the wedding you'll
become a multimillionaire.

But what do I get? Rubbish?

Only 10 thousand ponds, that's all?

You should be grateful, that I'm giving a
lazy man like you 10 thousand pounds.

Buddy, you should be grateful to me.

That I'm actually pretending to
be your nephew.

Understood?

Ssshh! Shut up! Keep your voice low!

If you ever say this again, I will be your
worst nightmare! Understood?

Okay, fine, I won't say it.

Buddy, you take a lot of tension too soon.

But, set one thing even in your mind!

What?

You and I are frauds.

It's just that the situation is such that you
are my uncle right now and I the nephew.

But don't forget I'm your father
when it comes to cheating.

Rascal.

Hey, what did you say?

- What did you just call me? Rascal?
- Yes.

What a name, Rascal!

Now, that's a name that suit's
my personality. Rascal.

What was Rasiklal? Such a oldie name.

Hey, shut up!

Shut up!

I'm still tensed about who made that call.

And then your drama.

I don't understand what all we'll have to
do to get this man to agree.

Bhulabhai, I have meetings with the Queen.
I'm always in and out of Buckingham Palace.

Isn't it?

I say, agree for the wedding.

The whole problem will be solved.

I say after the wedding, you and
your wife should shit to the UK.

But he blacklisted is the.

What did he say?

I'll tell you.

- Stop.
- Shut up.

Sorry.

Bhulabhai, there's no stress, I'll tell you,
I have a lot of contacts in the immigrations.

With a snap I'll make the blacklisted
name white listed.

Really? Can that really happen?

- Yeah, yeah.
- There, Sweety has come.

- Come, come, child.
- Hi, everyone.

Child, you have already met Jasubhai.

This is his nephew, Rasiklal Mehta.

- Hello.
- Hi.

So, still studying?

Yeah, final year.

What you study is the?

Howard University.

Wow. Howard, huh?

Even Mark Zuckerberg studied there, isn't it?

Yea.. Yeah, yeah.

He was my senior, a very nice boy, uncle.

Whenever he was tensed he'd come to me.

One day he came up to me and said, Ras,..

..I'm very tensed, I don't know
what to do in the future.

Sweety, I asked him, do you have a pen drive?

He said yes.

Then nothing, Aunty, I took my project
and gave it to him.

He has a very big heart.

And Sweety, today when I see
him at this position,...

When I see the boy has settled,...
I feel so good, Uncle.

If you are responsible for someone's
bread butter, what can be better?

Perfect.

I think I should move on,
I have college tomorrow morning.

Good night.

- Good night, child.
- Sweety, don't forget to set the alarm.

Yes, Maa. Don't worry.

Bye.

He gave Mark Zukerberg the idea!

The best part is how can
someone fake so much!

But they can.

I'm scared! What if they fool dad like this
and dad changes his mind.

What do you mean?

I mean, before dad changes his mind,
we should do something.

I didn't get it.

I'll explain it.

Do you love me?

Yeah.

- Do you want to marry me?
- Of course!

- My family has agreed to us getting married?
- Yes, that they have.

What we are supposed to do later,
why not do now?

Correct! Oh, oh, are you mad?

All you talk about is marriage, marriage,
marriage! See what I have become in this.

I told you we'll get married after the exams!

Yes, marriage s all I think about.

And you know, once I think of
something, I do exactly that!

Sir, Sir, please, sir. Or else dad will get
me married to that Rasiklal!

So, what can I do?

Sir, please, sir they are genuinely in love!

- Sir, please help.
- Sir, I second Ruma.

I third Ruma.

Sir, I will kill Ruma.

Why Sir?

It was alright up to getting it fixed!

- But making a fake profile for the wedding?
- Aakash.

No, no, no, and above all this is
a non bailable offense.

Booba, how many times do I have to remind
you everything is fair in love and war! Right?

But this is not love, it's only war!

God never gave us the opportunity
to be parents.

Booba, these kids are giving us that.

Let's take the chance?

May be,.. we'll never get another chance.

Okay.

Yayyy!

Wed, thurs, fri, sat...

This seems okay...

It's great!

If one more thing would have matched, then
it would be like Ram and Sita's pair.

And what if we find that one thing too?

Wow, the other suitors are also siting here.

- Hello.
- Namaste.

Hey, Pandit, sit, sit, it's our house, sit.

Son, sit, sit!

So Pandit, tell us about the match.

Sir, I have checked both their horoscopes.

If the girl gets married to this boy, then
you can say the girl will rule the world.

Great!

What's so great about that? The girl is
ruling the world ever since she was a child.

I'm just seeing the horoscopes.

Listen...

According to the stars, 20th of this month
is the best time to get her married.

Wow!

And after that, there is not a single good
time for 5 years in Sweety's stars.

See! Your pandit is saying so, listen to him.

Listen to him, say yes, I'm telling you.

All 36 virtues match, Bhulabhai!
Don't think, say yes.

Bhulabhai, not every time do all the
virtues match. Say, yes?

Say, yes, say, yes.

Your daughter will be very happy. Say, yes!
Say, yes, yes, yes, yes.

- Yes...
- Agreed!

Congratulations. Congratulations.

Finally, we are related!

Hey, donkey, why are you standing like that.
Touch your father in laws feet.

- God bless you.
- Bend properly.

Touch your mother in laws feet.

- No! No, no, no.
- Emotions...

Stop being emotional.

I can't bear the happiness.

Finally, it's a yes.

Daddy, you should also shift to London with us.

I know you can't talk, but at least listen.

We promised those people and these
people have made papa loose it.

Now the Desai family's honor
is in your hands, Maa.

Save it, maa. Please, maa, please.

For my sake!

- Now, let's start planning everything.
- Yes, yes, as you elders say.

Stop, son!

Sis? you broke your vow?

Jigna?

If my daughter gets married,
it will be only to this boy!

Wow, wow, wow, wow!

In the last 30 years, for the first time,
first time, my wife has broken her vow!

This is not her voice!
This is the Goddess' will.

Jigna!

Jasubhai, I can't deny the Goddess herself,
I'm sorry, this wedding is called off.

Bhulabhai!

- We are going to be related now!
- Yes, yes, of course.

One minute, Uncle? What nonsense is this?

You always insult us. The other day too,...
no, no, Uncle...

That's enough! No, I don't want to hear a word.

I don't want to hear a word! Let's go.

Let's go.

Now, I feel, like that Pandit said, let's
get the wedding done on the 20th itself.

- You don't mind, do you?
- Not at all, done.

Sir, what are you doing?
The last exam paper is on 20th.

The paper is in the morning,
afternoon you're getting married! Go!

- God bless you, my son.
- Vulture boy.

Culture boy.

- Hi, oldie!
- You're relaxing, everything's over!

- Hey, Jazz...
- What hey Jazz?

What sort of cheater are you?

You gave up so soon?

Hey, stop, stop, stop!
Why are you swinging about?

My money has been spent and
you're taking advantage.

What do you know?

Jazz,...

Oldie, when there are two cheaters like us,
nothing can get over so soon.

- Didn't understand?
- No!

My devilish mind tells me,..

..there is something wrong about that groom.

How can you say that?

Listen to me very carefully.

India is a male dominated society.

And the groom here, always sits with pride.

But did you see him? He was so scared.

An NRI groom, so scared?

That is not digestible.

- Namaste, Namaste.
- Namaste.

What will you have?

- No, no, nothing, thanks.
- So, you eat.

No, I have diabetes.

- Have it, sir.
- Papa! Papa.

Have it, nothing will happen with
a piece of sweet, eat it.

- Okay.
- Yes, yes.

There you go!

Hey, Mr. Patel! Congratulations!

Thank you.

Your son is getting married.

Congratulations, child.

- Hey, son? Congratulate them.
- Yes, Uncle.

- I'm very angry with uncle.
- Is it?

I'm very very very angry, Uncle.

Why?

Why? Very bad.

Very, very, very bad.

You're getting one boy married and
didn't call the other one?

Who is the other one.

I'll tell you, no, I'll show you.

- Show them, Son.
- See, this.

Look here.

- Who lives in the hostel, calls himself an NRI.
- Stand up.

Stand, stand, look, Mr. Patel,
how does he look?

The commissioner is here.

- There, meet him.
- Congratulations, congratulations.

- I am father.
- Oh, congratulations. Very good.

- Congratulations, congratulations.
- Thank you, please eat.

How are you Shradbhai?

No, not good.

You didn't even get caught by the
police and yet not good?

Hey! Whatever it is, talk to me!

Don't drag them into this.

Hey! Listen to me.

Remove the clothes you are wearing
and get out of here.

If anyone finds out the groom has changed,
it will be bad for everyone, I'm telling you!

Now, change the groom!

Catch him!

Run, run, run!

Give me the passport, hey! give it to me.

- Run! Run!
- Catch him.

Sir?

Fight, kill, WIN!

- Catch!
- Hey, it's there!

What is this?

- It's mine, it's mine.
- Yours? Here you go.

Thank you.

Pandit! You're caught red handed!

If an auspicious occasion is this,
then what is inauspicious?

Follow them! Thief!

What is happening?

Look, there is so much trouble here
and he has fallen asleep.

There is a riot at the banquet hall,
the Commissioner,... Send help!

You rat, this is how you harass good people?

You, rat! You, rat!

Let's go!

Are you mad! It's my wedding!

It was your wedding! It can't be anymore!

There!

- I found the passport!
- My Chotu, my friend!

Let's go, let's go! Booba, Sir?

- I am not leaving!
- Sir, pick him up!

- What are you'll doing?
- Pick him up!

What will Sweety think.

Ask for forgiveness later, as long
as you have your life.

Jijaji?

The groom ran away!

Dad!

Daddy!

Daddy!

Fast! please, go faster!

Has Aakash come? Has he come here, yet?

No, Sir.

- Keep this number and call me when he comes.
- Police... Police...

Keep an eye out here.

Let's go.

- I'm going...
- No, stop feeling guilty right now.

And before the police kill us, let's go
to Bombay for a few days to Chamanbhai.

Yes? Say yes?

Hey, when the matter subsides come back and
ask Sweety to forgive you.

If she forgives you, get married too.

Stop this nonsense, dammit!

I don't know what sort of
a mess Sweety is in.

Wait, wait, wait, please!

Excuse me, please excuse me.

We have to go to Bombay, please, please.

The patient is out of danger.

I'm not scared of slaps, Sir!
I'm scared of love.

I'm not scared of slaps, Sir!
I'm scared of love!

- I'm not scared of slaps, Sir!
- I'm scared of slaps!

- I'm very scared.
- Hey! Why are you crying?

- Get him here!
- Stand up!

Oh, god. Oh, god! My head is spinning.

My head is spinning, I'm dizzy.

Can I have a green tea, please?

He stabbed the Commissioner with a fork.

Is it? Then we have to treat
him like the chief guest.

Now, tell me where have you hidden the boys?

We have chops, mince, livers, brain and
leg soup. What would you like?

1 plate liver and half a portion brain.

Hey, 1 liver and half a brain!

Tell me, what should I get you?
Chop, liver, leg?

Breathe!

- Yes, tell me.
- Let me think.

Get two chops and two pieces of leg.
Ask them what they want.

- What do you want?
- Coldrink.

He's pure vegetarian, Chamanbhai.

Get 2 teas for them not coldrink.

Yes, listen!

Chamanbhai, he said you have a
job consultancy business?

I have a business of agencies.

Where there is a job or there isn't,
Chamanbhai has everything in his hard disk.

Understood?

Chamanbhai, I need any job
related to the media.

Media related?

I'll ask and tell you.

Hey, Steve Job, tell me the
openings for media?

Tell me fast.

Your time starts now.

Yeah!

Okay, get off the phone.

My money is being wasted!

Listen, the media is houseful.

But I have a hack.

I have contacts at a British news channel.

Where in Briton?

No, Afghanistan.

Afghanistan?

Yes, a friend of mine is the HR guy.

Go there. Some War effect movie
is being made.

I'll get you a job there, what's the big deal?

Chamanbhai, he has to go Sweety
also before he dies.

- So go to Afghanistan.
- But...

Chamanbhai, Afghanistan!

Go for a trip.

May be you’ll get a ticket to
London from there.

Greetings. The boy and his brother
are not to be found.

But their fake father is in Police custody.

Amit, why are we talking about someone
we are not related to?

See, whatever happened, happened.

Wow!

What are you doing? Enough.

What? What are you doing?

Don't take any more, you have diabetes.

You and that Doctor are one team.

Sweety, see what your mother is doing!

Sweety?

What's happened to her?

- Sweety?
- Sweety...

Sweety, my child? What happened?
Why are you crying?

See, even we have made a mistake.

In our times, a match was made only
with people who were known.

That's the problem, Maa.

I thought I knew him.

What?

I never told you, but we were
in love with each other.

This... What is this you're saying?

Okay now, whatever happened was good.

What if he'd run away after the wedding?

What would we do then?

- Don't worry, just wait.
- This card is also not registering.

- Not even this one?
- No.

You do this, this watch...
This watch,...

Keep this. I'll come tomorrow
and pay your bill. Here.

- she doesn't understand Hindi.
- Rolex.

I understand. A little.

Doesn't matter. She took the watch,
didn't she? That's all.

Work should get done.

This watch is fake!

I need cash!

Duplicate?

We don't accept duplicates.

No! Original?

- Original.
- I'll take care of this.

I know how original it is.

You take this.

Thank you, Thank you.

How could he give me a duplicate?
I don't understand.

I'll sue him, he can't get away with this!

Okay. try his number first.

I'll try, I'll have to try at least once.

- I'll see if it happens.
- Yeah, try, try.

Hello?

Bhulabhai?

How are you?

Much better, feeling fit too.

That's good news. How is Sweety doing?

Sweety is okay.

The thing is my nephew Rasiklal,..

..it would be nice to consider Sweety
and him getting married.

What say?

But this time before I commit,
I'd like to ask Sweety.

Okay. I'll wait for your phone.

Hey. When did you come?

Dad, your medicines.

Dad, I want to tell you something.

Yes, tell me.

You say yes to Jasu Uncle.

Child, this is the question of your
entire life, think once more.

Yeah, dad.

Sweety, have you lost it?

You agreed to get married to that rascal?

Once, I'd thought about myself.

What happened?

You both saw.

So I'm doing exactly what Mom and
dad will be happy with.

But we can speak to them just on the phone.

- Use the technology...
- Technology is only for talks, not emotions.

You're being very emotional, eh?

Do you have a fever?

I'm okay, but once you here what I have
to say, you'll have a fever.

- Why? Got a bacteria to kill me?
- Not a bacteria!

Listen to me.

That, bride.. the bride?

- Who?
- That girl, umm... Sweety Desai.

Yeah, what about her?

Yeah... She has accepted.

What are you saying?
- Yes!

She has agreed to get married.

- She agreed?
- Yeah.

- No, no, you're lying.
- No! I'm serious.

- She agreed?
- She absolutely did.

Whatever Bhulabhai owns, everything, money,
property, we are going to feast on it!

But for such good news, why are
we in such a dry place?

Come on, let's go to a better place, drink,
live our lives to the fullest!

Hey, to live your life to the fullest and
go drink you need money, and there is none.

You fakir, come I'll pay for you.
Come on, let's go drink!

We are going to get a lot of money!
Here, set your hair right.

- No. Let this be.
- We'll drink good booze.

Welcome, Jasubhai, welcome.

- Namaste.
- Namaste.

- Namsate, mummy.
- May the Goddess bless you.

- Um... Where is Sweety?
- She's probably upstairs.

- Can I go meet her?
- Yes, go.

Come.

Jijaji, nice boy is the.

Sweety? I've been looking for you and
you're watching the sunset here?

Isn't this how that Aakash would talk?

I'm sorry. I was just trying to
make you laugh so,...

Sorry.

It's okay.

It's okay? So you didn't feel bad?

So tell me this too, you're happy
with this marriage, right?

Sweety, you should think
over this once again.

What should she think about?

The wedding date has been fixed,
the cards are printed.

But her heart is not ready and obviously...
- Hey!

Are you a cardiologist?
How do you know about her heart?

I know. I know how many love stories
start every year at college and...

..and how many of them last
until college is over.

Hi.

You look very pretty.

I don't know where to start.

What's left?

How can someone do that?

You left me all alone in front of everyone!

Did you even once think about me?

About my family?

- Just a minute, at least listen to me.
- What should I listen to?

What should I listen to?

For 7 months there hasn't been a
single day that I didn't call you, Aakash!

Sweety, my phone number was blocked.

The number was blocked... Facebook? Email?

You could have at least replied.

After all this, how could I have replied?

Shit!

Why am I even talking to you?

Aakash, I'm getting married today.

You have already ruined everything once.
Please, please not today!

I haven't come here to ruin it, Sweety.

I have just come here to say,
don't marry Rasiklal.

He's a fraudster.

He's marrying you only for your money.

That's it.

Are you done? Now, get lost!

Even if Rasik is a fraud, I don't care!

Because I rather marry a fraud than a coward!

Welcome, welcome.

One minute, wait!

Here you go! Take it. It's an amazing juice.

Hey, Sir?

I think I've seen you some where,
i recognize you.

Where? Where have I seen you?

I'm very popular, I'm Dilear Mehndi's brother.

- Oh, Dilear Mehndi?
- *sings bollywood song*

Cheers!

No, no cheers. Everyone is watching,
things will get messed.

- Welcome, welcome...
- Welcome, welcome...

I'm saying it.

- Welcome, welcome.
- Come, come.

Hey, Rascal, where is this sound of
boiling water coming from?

It's from my tummy.

Is your tummy rumbling?

What happened? Is everything okay?

Oh God! At such a time?

Now, how can we go?
The girl is about to come.

Hey, wait! Brother, no! Wait.

Uncle,.. get the girl.

- Yes, yes, give it.
- Give the garlands.

Amit, hand over the garland.

Both will now put the garland
around each others neck.

Now for the last round, the groom has to
go back and the bride will lead.

And now, with this, the wedding is over.

- Congratulations.
- Congratulations.

Pandit! This, this wedding can't happen.

- No, this marriage can't happen!
- It's... It's... done.

Hey, who you?

I? I'm Rasiklal. I'm,.. I'm the real one.

Rasiklal? You? What are you doing here?

What's happening?

Whatever is happening, is right.

Who is this? Who is this fraud groom?

Show your face!

Aakash?

- What is this?
- How dare you do that?

Instead of the wife of a coward, you wanted
to marry a fraud, isn't it?

There, even I'm a fraud now.

I can't be his wife ever!

Child, he's not a fraud, these
two are the frauds!

You ungrateful idiots!

After he met you, he came to me.

He showed me a video clip, these two
wanted to loot me.

Child, this boy loves you.

He's an orphan but he's genuine.

And the best part is, he's an NRI!

If he's an NRI you can keep him for you.

It's better I die instead of being his wife!

- Sweety? Where are you going?
- where are you going?

- Sweety, stop!
- Stop!

Sweety, stop! Sweety, stop!

Sweetie, stop! Sweetie, stop!

Sweetie, stop! Stop her!

Stop the music!

- Sweety!
- Sweety!

Stop my child, stop.

Swear just stop for my sake!

Sweety!

Hey! Wake up, Sweety ran away!

Where are you going? Start the car!

Let's go! Fast.

Come soon, we still have a chance!

Let's go, let's go, Alia climb fast!

Run, run!

Hey, where are you going?

You just said, run!

Sit here!

Sit inside, sit inside!

- Who will drive?
- I can't drive.

- Even I can't drive.
- I.. I.. I will drive.

Let's go, let's go!

Sweety!

- Sweety, stop!
- Sweety, this is for me, stop!

Listen to me, stop!

Sweety!

Hey, stop!

- Stop following me!
- Sweety, stop! Please!

Sweety, please. Stop, Sweety!

Just go to hell!

Sweety! Look your mother is calling you.

Listen to me.

Sweetie!

Faster.

Sir, sir!

Stop, or else...

- I love you!
- Stop following me!

Sweetie, stop! I beg you to!

But we are behind her.

Shut up!

Sweetie, stop! I'll beg to
you from behind you.

What are you doing?

Ajay! Are you okay?

When you don't know how to ride a horse,
why did you sit on it!

You idiot, you ran away with my scooter!

Go, Aakash! Go!

Sweetie, stop! Sweetie, stop!

Stop, for me!

Please Sweetie, stop!

Go to hell! I rather kill myself
than marry you.

Mother Goddess, save me!

Sweety!

Sweety! Sweety!

My daughter!

- Sweety? Sweety? Sweety?
- Aakash? Aakash?

Aakash?

Somebody go, help them! Aakash?

There!

Sis, sis, there they are!

Aakash? Aakash?

Aakash?

Sweety, my child1

Sweety, my child!

What did you do!
- They are okay, okay...

What happened? What happened?

What happened? Come, let's get married.

Go away from here!

Sir, I don't understand?

What, DK?

Sweety, knows how to swim, then why did
she jump in the water to suicide?

How do I know? Ask her. Sweety?

Tell Sweety.

Because of this idiot!

He doesn't know how to swim.

I just wanted to check if
he really loves me.

Nor am I a coward!

Neither am I a fraud.

The situation didn't allow me
to say anything then.

But now, I'm saying.

Sweety Desai, I love you!

Now, the wedding is over!