Subways (2014) - full transcript

- Thank you Jesus!
Thank you Lord!

Oh, we received justice
for these children.

Thank you Jesus,
that they convicted!

Yes, yes! Glory glory glory
glory glory glory glory glory

glory glory glory glory glory
glory glory glory glory glory!

Hallelujah! Yes, Jesus!

- There were still many
signs of grief today

and then signs of relief
and also tears of joy

as New Yorkers received
word that the Monster Mom

had been found guilty on four
counts of first degree murder.

The jurors deliberated for
only an hour today and they--



(loud vocalizing)

- No singing in the
holding room, ladies.

- Will you honor the unofficial list?

- No, non-union go home.

- [Voiceover] On everything
I love, I hate people

because they're
the fucking worst.

- [Nique] I'm so sorry.
- [Caleb] Move.

- I had to--

- [Voiceover] I mean,
I just can't take it

just how dumb and
lazy most people are.

(indistinct talking)

- I took some petty
cash to make copies.

I didn't have enough for more.

- Do you have a debit card, sweetie?
- What?



- (mocking) Do you have
a debit card, sweetie?

- I have my debit card.

- So.

- [Voicemail] It's so
awful, it's entertaining.

It's so ugly, it's beautiful.

- Morning. Do you know how
many dancers per group?

- Twenty.

- [Alan] Do you know if
they're seeing non-union today?

- [Caleb] No.
- [Alan] No they're not, or no

- NO.

[Voiceover] And it's my
belief that when we aren't

in tune with reality,
when we aren't accepting

of what's real, of the truth
of the ugly of our whole selves

that life loses all
light, loses all purpose,

loses all meaning,
loses all beauty.

For without acknowledging truth,

recognizing that ugly
exists, is inherent in all,

without establishing
that, there's no way

to determine beauty.

To prove beauty exists,

beauty is in comparison to ugly.

For there to be beauty,
there must be ugly.

It's a fact. It's ugly.

It's beautiful.

- She's an apprentice.

- What?

- There are a lot
of girls out there.

- So we have to type.
They're all union?

- Yes.

- Bring them in in groups of 20.

- Brilliant.

- What?
- Nothing.

- [Voiceover] And so therefore,
we must not make believe.

I cannot make believe that all
is equal, that all is good,

that there is no ugly,
no worse, no difference.

Things must be relative
to something else.

- Alan!

- [Voiceover] In order for good
to exist, there must be bad.

To recognize happiness,
you must experience sad.

- Go set up studio D.

- But that session is not until 4.
- Clearly, you need the extra time.

- Are you ready?

- Yes. Ladies,
follow me quickly.

- [Voiceover] It's
duality. It's beautiful.

(upbeat music)

- Before Johnson
begins I just wanted

to thank you divas
for coming out today.

- [Girl] Thank you!

- OK. Johnson.

- [Johnson] Breathe,
ladies. Breathe.

This has a very
jazzy, sexy feel.

We need length,
stretch and technique.

It's very sensual,
think sassy, OK?

Let's begin. We have one,
two, back three, four

split left, right,
left and right.

Again, we have out,
back, step to the left...

- [Voiceover] We are
blessed with certain gifts

and we are cursed with certain
misgivings that we cannot

aspire to be more
than we inherently are

and we don't all know
that, but we should.

(Johnson instructing)

- Can you get some coffee?

- [Voiceover] It's a
tragedy. It's an epiphany.

It's transcendent, its
ugly, it's...beautiful.

(hip hop music)

- [Alan] Hi guys, thank
you so much for coming.

So in five minutes
we're going to start.

I'm going to call all your names
and you're going to line up over here-

- [Caleb] Take this to the table, thank
you.

- [Alan] But--
- [Caleb] Thank you.

OK, can I have Kyley
Taylor, Kimmie....

You, Kimmie, and Cat
Davis. All right.

You three, 16 bars, strict
16, they will cut you off.

By the door please, thank you.

Everybody else, thank you.

- Thank you Kimmie D-
Kimmie...

Kimmie.

- Hi, everybody.

- Hi, Kyley. What will you
be singing for us today, hon?

- Uh, "Mean to Me".

OK, sorry, I'm a little nervous.

I'm kind of new to singing.

- Oh, you're new. How new?

Uh..

Like, I don't know
how to answer that.

Like, new new?

- [Ricardo] You'll be fine, sweetie.
- [Johnson] You'll be fine.

(piano playing)

- ♪ You're mean to me

♪ Why must you be

♪ mean to me

♪ Gee, honey

♪ It seems to me

♪ you love to see me crying

♪ I don't know why

♪ I stay home

♪ each night

♪ When you say you'll phone

♪ You don't and I'm left alone

♪ Singing the blues

♪ and sighing

♪ You treat me coldly

♪ each day of the year

♪ You always scold me

♪ Whenever somebody is near

♪ Dear

♪ It must be great fun to be

♪ mean to me

♪ You shouldn't forget you see

♪ What you mean to me ♪

- Well, you shouldn't be scared
sweetie, that was lovely.

- So pretty. So pretty.

- Thank you.
- [Kim] No, thank you Kyley.

- [Ricardo]
(whispering) So pretty.

(sighing)
So pretty.

- [Caleb] Shut up.
- [Ricardo] Fuck you.

- Thank you, Kyley.

- Thank you!
- [Kyley] Thank you!

(affirmative murmuring)

- Caleb, you can tell them
that we're done for the day.

Thank you.

- All right, ladies, ladies.

You, wonderful. Everybody
else, thank you.

- Do you know when
they'll be making calls?

- No. You shouldn't
worry about it.

- [Elliott] Yoohoo,
Caleb. Caleb!

Hey, stop acting like that.

- (mocking) "Stop
acting like that."

You're such a fucking faggot, I swear.
- You're a faggot, stop.

- You should go home,
we're not going to see

any non-union today, plus
they don't want any negros.

They cut us all.

- I'm only half negro.

- They don't want you either, Paki.
- Shut up.

- Did you make the
copies of those scripts

I asked you about yesterday?

- No, the machine is down.

- People are waiting on
these scripts, Caleb.

They have to be delivered.

- OK, I can have an
intern go and do it-

- Or you can go. Thoughts?

- Ow, bitch.

- "Ow, bitch." You
should go home.

We're having appointments pretty
soon, I'll get you one, OK?

- But can you get me in today?

- (mocking) No, I will
get you an appointment

when we set them up.

And stop flirting with these
boys, you look desperate.

Doesn't he look desperate?

You look desperate, pitiful.

- Hey.

Uh, that's my brother.

Yeah, yeah. He-

he's my brother.

I'm a-going.

- What are you doing?

- [Nique] Finish setting up--
- [Caleb] Come.

I'm sorry that today
was a bit messy but I--

- A bit messy?

- But I literally
got there and--

- I don't care!

OK, nobody cares. You
are the apprentice.

I made you the apprentice
from an intern for a reason.

Apprentices have answers.
Interns have excuses.

- But I need to--

- It's not just about today, OK?

You were gone for
those two weeks.

You're all messy and
moody and shit now.

I mean, buck up bitch! Ain't
nobody got time for that!

- My mother died

and when she died I went
home as late as I could

and came back the next
day from California

because I wanted
to be committed.

I am so committed! I'm not
even getting paid, really.

- Oh! You're not getting paid?

- That's not what I meant--

- I guess $50 a day is just
too much for some bitches I guess, huh?

I guess some bitches are
real grandiose, right?

- Please don't call me a bitch.
- See, I feel differently.

I feel like $50 a day is much
too much for a bitch who can't

remember to bring water for
our fucking casting session.

I've never been so embarrassed in my entire life.
- I'm sorry.

- I swear, you know what?

I don't think we'll need
your $50 services ever again.

You're dismissed.

- Caleb, don't.
- Good day.

(hip hop music)

(indistinct talking)

- [Voiceover] When I was a
boy, I peed the bed at night.

Either two things would happen:
sometimes I knew immediately

I would suddenly feel a
warm, wet sensation on my leg

and then I knew I
wasn't dreaming.

I would open my eyes and try
to quietly and quickly hide

my sheets before my mother found out.

My step-mother found out.

If she found out, she would
no doubt berate my existence,

my inability to function
as a human being,

to measure up to a civilized
standard, that I was too smart

to be so dumb and
worse, that I was nasty.

Dirty, like swine
wallowing in its own filth.

I was filthy and she would
say those things, upset,

as she stripped my bed
of the gold-tinted sheets

having me scrub the
mattress with a concoction

of vinegar, soap and hot water,

trying to dilute the
stain, clear my piss,

my brother Elliott quietly
laughing from his bed

and though hurt and
embarrassed, I wouldn't cry.

I was just enraged, mad,
angry, not at my mom

but at myself for
being 'less than'.

Still other times, in
the other scenario,

when I pissed myself,
I wouldn't know.

I would wake up the
next day, cold liquid,

causing my pajamas to stick to my body

and only then would I realize

what had happened and
then my mom still yelled,

I'd still clean,
Elliott still laughed.

The only difference is
that I still dreamed,

I finished my dream.

It was not cut off abruptly
be an unpleasant reality

and who knows if the
dream was happy or sad

or scary but,

it at least happened

and that happening

would forever be
a moment of peace.

Even wallowing in piss,

laying, sleeping in filth.

- Oh really, Tracy?

You really think I'm the
fucking problem here?

Really?

I am NOT the fucking problem!

It's your problem.

I am, done. With you.

- In myself, I know you
just to be an eater of dust.

Leave me here

and lower it year by year

as you promised till
the last be an oubliette

and my name inscribed
on the four winds.

Still, still I win!

I have been a woman and
loved as a woman loves

and lost as a woman loses.

I have born a son.

He will rule
Scotland and England.

(inaudible)

- [Kim] It's one
thing after another.

I mean, when I hired
you, you were great.

You were right here, you
were paying attention,

you were doing what
I needed you to do

and I don't know where
the hell you are now.

I talk to you, I ask you to
do stuff and you're just not

you're not present any more
and it's driving me nuts, OK?

So I'm boring you?

- Of course not. I'm sorry.

- The bottom line
is, when I or Ricardo

or another casting director
asks you to do something,

we expect you to
do it specifically.

If we wanted an intern or
an apprentice to do it,

we would have asked them.
You're an associate for a reason.

We give you associate level
work to do, appreciate that.

We could certainly give
it to somebody else.

- I'm sorry. Today was not my best--
- [Kim] It's not just today.

Anthony and Pierre told me
you were having the intern

set up the appointments?

- It was once, and I watched--

- [Kim] Come on, confirm
yes, set no. You know that.

- Of course. I'm sorry.

- I like you but
I'm not going to--

- [Caleb] I know.

- Good, now since Nique
didn't work out, I recommend

that we move Alan up to the
apprentice position, yes?

- Sure, he's great.

- [Kim] Excellent. Can you--
(cell phone buzzes)

Kim Kelly.
(chuckling)

Yes, hey, how are you?

So.... mm-hm.

(indistinct talking)

- OK, how would you like to
be the next casting apprentice

at Kim Kelly Casting?

- What about Nique?

- Again, how would you
like to be the next

casting apprentice here
at Kim Kelly Casting?

(nervous laughing)
- Yes.

- Good. Confirm these two
appointments for tomorrow.

- Confirm these appointments?
You mean set them?

- [Caleb] Tomato, tom-ah-to.

- Hi, can I get some iceberg lettuce and

cheese and bacon.

- Apples, mandarin
oranges, grapes.

- Chicken, beans, turkey, bacon.

- No, never mind, don't
put the cheese and bacon.

- Sunflower seeds, feta,
not blue cheese, feta. Feta.

- Cheddar and ranch dressing
please. Extra ranch.

- Chicken and
croutons. Thank you.

- Croutons and balsamic vinaigrette.

Thanks.

- Hi could I just get some
romaine with salmon and vinegar?

Thanks.

- I love her. LOVE her.

- Easy, hater.

- [Pierre] I don't care if
Halle Berry has a fucking Oscar.

If you're not right you're not
right and she is not right.

- Just shut up.

Don't nobody care about
your casting thoughts

on an imaginary movie, loser.

- "Don't nobody care"? You
shut up, or speak English.

- I was speaking English.
- Well speak it properly.

- I can properly tell
you to suck my dick

or wait, is that what
Anthony told you?

- No!
- Are you guys...? Oh, that was a little secret, right?

- You're such a fucking bitch.

I can't believe you told him that.
- Oh yeah, everything.

Cum shots, how big,
how small, the works.

- Fucks you!

- About how you cried because
you didn't get into film

school, about how you needed
someone to make you feel good.

- This is not savory
lunch conversation, OK?

- I agree, so can we not
pretend-cast the movie

as some crazy bitch who
killed her kids this morning?

That shit's insensitive.

- We were just
having fun, Caleb.

- Well, no.

You know, next time
you tell Kim about what

I'm doing with the interns,
I'll tell both your boyfriends

about what slut-fucking
bitches they're dating, OK?

(nervous giggling)

(urinating)

(hip hop music)

- [Voiceover] Over
5 million people use

the New York City
subway on a daily basis.

5 million people all
travelling to do something,

be something, get
something, give something,

love something, kill
something, buy something,

steal something,
all these people.

So many people going
places every day.

So many people not
going places every day.

So many just trying to sleep,
to eat, to beg, to cheat,

to rest, to see, to
survive every day.

So many people.
All these people.

5 million a day and we all
collide, our disparate journeys,

our unique motives, our
wantings and longings

we're all on the same train.

We're all breathing the same
air, sitting in the same

seats, bumping into,
annoying, using, avoiding,

dealing with each other.

We all share this, all these
people, 5 million people.

Some friends, some
families, some enemies.

Most strangers but yet
and still we're connected.

It's ironic, it's crazy,
it's maddening, it's stupid.

It's crazy, it's...beautiful.

- [Elliott] You see
the one over there?

Caleb? Caleb. Caleb? Caleb.

- Oh my god, what?
What? Who? Where?

- Over there,
everything's over there.

Over there.

- Don't point, you tacky bitch.

- [Elliott] He see you?

The one in the blue shirt?

Hubba hubba. (mock singing)

- [Caleb] Elliott, you've
lost some of that baby fat

unless you're going for these
fat fucks, I mean really.

Have some self respect.

- Hey, some people
have a preference.

I like a little
extra meat on my men.

- [Caleb] Clearly.

- Hey, stop. Stop.

Stop. For shit's
sake Caleb, stop!

You're all over me.

- Calm down.

(teasing)

("Doing 'M Thing" by Nhojj)

- [Girl] What are you doing?

- [Mother] Janice,
get over here now!

- Hey.
(kissing)

(whispering)
You're an hour late.

- I know.

Ebony and Neil, is
there a problem?

- Oh no, we were just waiting
to eat until you got here.

I mean, we are in a
bit of a food coma.

- [Caleb] Well, you all
look like you could afford

to miss a meal or two.

(awkward laughter)

- [Neil] How rude.
- [Caleb] I'm just playing. Joking.

I'm sorry about being late
and everything, all right?

My apologies, sugar.

- Oh no worries,
no worries. Wine?

- [Caleb] Yes,
please. Thank you.

Hey, I should not look like
an asshole if I'm late.

The next time I'm late, just
go ahead and start without me.

We've been dating
for three years.

It should not be this
serious, OK? Thank you. Thank you.

(inaudible discussions)

- [Neil] So, I'm sorry,
you have to tell me.

You two are...brothers?

- [Elliott] Yeah.
- [Neil] Same parents?

- Uh, Same father.

- Oh.
(snickering)

So who's older?

- [Ebony] That's rude.
- [Neil] What?

- Who do you think is?
- I'd say Caleb.

- No tea, no shade.

- All tea, all shade.

(laughter)

- I think you guys
both look good.

- He's a month older than I am.

We're basically twins.

- [Ebony] How is that....? Oh.

Let me stay out of brown folks' business.
- Exactly

- So, you guys all work
with Nate in finance?

Wall Street,
everything, all that?

- No no no, I work with
Neil and Ebony over here,

she's just Neil's fag-hag.

- That's rude. Real rude.

- And Gus, he works
for the New York Times.

- Oh, that's cool.

- Yeah, it's OK.

- Well you know, Caleb
here, he's a writer.

- My baby is quite the writer.

He's applying for
grad school for it.

- So what do you do now?

- Close your mouth when
you're fucking chewing.

- I'm sorry.
(chuckling)

He's a casting director.

- Assistant.

- You know used to be a really good actor
you know,

with an agent and everything.
- Don't.

- [Elliott] Don't
be embarrassed.

I'll brag for you.
- I just don't like being the topic of conversation, OK?

I'm going to the little boy's room.

- I'll come with. Excuse us.

(chatter resuming)

- You think Gus was cute?

- Nigga, why are you so basic?

- I don't care.

("Spring Rain" by Nhojj)

What are you doing?

(knocking)
- [Nate] Baby, we're about to eat some cake.

(water running)

- So Nate, do you want to take
that last piece of cake home?

- Oh no, you can take it but
thank you, I appreciate it.

- [Neil] Oh child please,
I don't want that.

- [Ebony] Yes, you do.

- [Elliott] I'll take it.
- [Gus] I'll take it.

- You want to split it?

- [Elliott] That
would be nice, yeah.

- [Neil] So I've calculated
it's going to be about $75

per person, you know with
tax, for the catering.

That's OK with everyone, right?

(murmuring)

- I'm sorry Nate, I know
it's your birthday and all

but I can't pay that, I
mean, $75 is ridiculous, OK?

I can't do that.

- I'm glad you said something
because that is the worst.

(overlapping arguing)

- I can't do that, no. Sorry.

- [Gus] OK, just everyone pay
what you feel appropriate.

- [Neil] Nate is a good one.

- I know.

- [Nate] Don't act
this way Caleb.

Caleb, you're better than this!

- Oh, are you Nate?

- [Nate] What?
- Are you better than this?

- Yes, I am and so are you.

- OK Nate, well if
you're so much better

and I'm not better, then
why are you here, Nate?

- I just know that if I could
just love you long enough,

if I could love you hard
enough, you'll be better.

- I don't want to be fixed.

- Did you take your medication?

- Don't call me.

- [Nate] I'm not fucking chasing you any more!
- Don't!

(door rattling)

(slow hip hop music)

- [Voiceover] A man
walks into a bar.

He goes to the
bartender, says, "Damn,

"there's some hot motherfuckers
in this place tonight".

The bartender laughs,
pours him a drink, says,

"Are you kidding?"

The man swigs the drink,
says, "Yeah, motherfucker.

"That's a hot one over there
and a hot one over there

"and that motherfucker
is hot as dyn-o-mite.

"Oh yeah, there's
some hot motherfuckers

in this place tonight, damn."

The bartender laughs, says,
"Buddy, you're bugging."

The man swigs, says,
"How so, my man? How so?"

Bartender says, "We just opened.

"The only people in
here are me and you."

The man swigs, says, "Really?

Bartender, "Yeah."

And there's an
uncomfortable, sad silence,

so sad, so silent.

The man says, "I'm
blind", embarrassed.

Bartender pauses, pours
him another drink, says,

"Then how did you get here?"

The man swigs his drink,
he walks out the bar.

The bartender laughs.

- [Boyfriend] What's up, bitch?

- [Nique] Baby, hold up, please.
- [Boyfriend] Yeah, you heard me you little fucking bitch.

You fire her? Huh? Huh?

(Yelling)
You fire her, huh?

You think my girl's like a little bitch, huh?
- [Nique] Baby, please!

- Pick on me, you fucking bitch!

Pick on me, bitch!

(Nique gasping)

(discordant music)

- [TV Reporter] As
jury selection begins
in the Monster Mom

trial that has rocked the city
like no other crime in recent

history, new details emerge
from the accused social

networking pages
that have many asking

could this tragedy
have been avoided?

Were there signs that
could have prevented

this mother's massacre?
(doorbell buzzing)

(door opening and closing)

(footsteps approaching)

- Caleb, Nate's here.

- How you feeling, baby?

- Nate?

- Yeah, I'm here.

- Get out.

- Caleb--
- Get. Out.

- [Nate] Caleb, come on, I'm trying.
- Get out. Get out!

- All right, all right.

- [Nettie] So she was singing
this song and she had to stop

and she was like, "Is
somebody singing with me?"

and we looked and it
was so embarrassing

because the accompanist
was humming along.

(laughing)
It was so ridiculous!

And Kim had to ask him
to leave after lunch.

I mean, look. Nice?

So anyway, Kim had to ask
him to leave after lunch

and I mean, who
does he think he is?

Does he think he's a singer in
a fucking duplex or something

like, it's not your time
to shine, Piano Man.

So anyway, unfortunately,
I had to be the one

to find a frickin' piano
player after that...

- You look good.

- Elliott, get her out of here.
- Caleb.

- I didn't come for
this today, you know I'm

still recovering from--
- Then leave, Stephanie. You should go!

- Why does he say
stuff life that?

- All right, all right.
- Why do you want to hurt me?

- All right, everyone just calm down. Relax.
- Shut up you Paki fuck!

- You see this, mom? You see how he gets?
- Get the fuck out Elliott, leave!

I don't want you here!
Get the fuck out!

- Don't talk to your
baby brother like that.

- Baby brother?

- He's taken all this time to
take care of you every day.

He's given up a lot for you!

- What, his flourishing
career? Oh fucking please.

- He has!

- What about me? What
about all I've given up?

Should we discuss that?
Do we go through that?

- Here we go. We don't discuss--

- Oh, my super mother bitch!

- I am your mother,
don't you dare.

Don't you dare speak
to me like that!

- You killed my mother, you
bitch. You fucking bitch!

- I took care of you like
you were my own child!

You were my child,

You are my child!
- I'm no part of you, you terrorist devil!

- I did everything.

Be mad at your real mother.

She left you. She
killed herself.

Be mad at her!

- You're a home wrecking
slut and you always will be.

Nothing can clean you
up. You disgust me.

- Yup, the slut that
your father wanted.

Be mad at him, not me.

- Nothing could clean you up!
(Stephanie crying out)

You're a slut. You're
a fucking slut!

You're a slut!

("Wade in the Water" by Nhojj)

- Hey.

You good? You OK?

Um, listen. I gotta run off.

I have to go to an audition, OK?

I'll talk to you later?

(delighted squealing)

- Hey!
(indistinct chattering)

- [Ricardo] Caleb, Nettie,
please. Close the door.

- Sorry, Ricardo.

- [Ricardo] Check this
out, she's adorable.

(overlapping conversation)

- [Pierre] Hey. I gotta
run out for some copies.

You know the machine.
- Yeah, I need a coffee.

- Where are you going?
- I'm running a session.

- You're running sessions?

- (softly) Yeah.

(phone ringing)

- Kim Kelly Casting.

I don't think she's
here right now.

- [Kim] Caleb!

- Caleb! Can you
schedule these, 15 minutes each

for tomorrow, start at 2.

- Hi, Kim.

(chuckling)
- Hi, Caleb.

I'm sorry, just running.
You get it, right?

- Why's Nique here?

- We were busy and
needed extra help.

I'm sorry, do you have a problem
with my staffing practices?

- Well, she's responsible
for my attack.

- You know she wasn't. I don't
have time for this, Caleb.

- And Alan's running
sessions now?

- Your tone is not
satisfactory, Caleb.

- I'm sorry. You're right.
- Listen, I don't care. Kick him out of the room.

Tell him to make calls,
I don't care what you do.

You have the authority,
just do it right.

- [Nique] Tracy's
on the line for you.

- Kim Kelly. Yeah?

Sure, OK. OK.

All right. Uh-huh.

(gasping)
- Oh, Caleb fucking Dwayne!

I heard you were in casting now!

- [Caleb] I am.
- Dude, how's Elliott?

- He's fine.

- Aw, man. The fucking
Dwayne brothers, fuck me!

- Fuck.

- Dude, I haven't seen you
guys since graduation, wow.

- Yeah, so do you want
to go ahead and do your--

- [Mark] Oh, was
it your accident?

- Huh?

- Your face. Is that
why you stopped acting?

- Yeah, you got it.

- Oh, man. I mean, you look
great but what happened?

- Shit.

- Oh.

Shit, yeah man.

That's why I moved
back from L.A.

Shit sucks.

- Yeah. So how about--

- When I'm finished why don't
you call up Elliott and then--

- You're going to have
to go audition now!

OK? Now leave, I'm working here.

- I'm just trying to
catch up, old friend.

- [Caleb] No.

- [Mark] I'm sorry man--
- No.

- I'll just go?
- Go.

- You seem so sad
now, Caleb, you know?

I mean, our class, everyone
I bump into these days

everyone's so fucking sad.

♪ Soon I will be done

♪ with the
troubles of this world

♪ Troubles of this world

♪ Troubles of this world ♪

(indistinct talking)

- We saw a bunch
of girls yesterday.

No, she was great, she's just not..
She was just not right for that part.

(overlapping conversations)

♪ Weepin' and wailin'

♪ no more

♪ Weepin' and wailin'

♪ no more

♪ Weepin' and wailing

♪ I'm going home to live

♪ with God ♪

(discordant ethereal music)

(no audio)

- [Elliott] But I
was good, right?

You could tell I
was nervous, right?

Caleb? Caleb. Caleb?

- [Caleb] Oh my god, what?

- How'd I do?

- Huh?
- At the audition, How'd I do?

- I don't know.

- But I was auditioning for you.

- I wasn't paying attention.

- Why wouldn't you?

- I don't know,
you fucking retard.

I don't know.

(treadmill slowing)

- Well, that was inappropriate.

- [Caleb] You're not talking?

You mad at me, hm?

You mad at me?

Mad at your big bro-bro, huh?

- Stop, I'm going to punch you.

- So we still going
to the club later

or you going to be
a bitch about it?

- Fuck. I'm sorry, I can't.

I have an audition tomorrow, so.

- On a Saturday?
- Well you know, I gotta do what I can

until you can work your magic.

Talk to you later?

- Yeah.

("I've Been Waiting
for You" by Nhojj)

- [TV Reporter] New Yorkers
react tonight, the first day

of cross examination in
the Monster Mom case.

Shelly Lee has
the story. Shelly?

- Sharon, it was a day
of heartache and tears

that led to many more questions
than there were answers

as the defense tried
desperately to present excuses

for what many New Yorkers
say they find inexcusable.

Today was a full day in
court as the Monster Mom

looked on, despondent
and very exhausted.

The prosecution went hard today.

(TV fading out)

- [Caleb] You have an audition?

You have an audition to go to, baby brother?
- Caleb, don't all right?

- Relax. Relax, Caleb.
- Really, you had an audition on a Saturday?

- You had an audition all right to go to?

- You look good, Caleb.
- [both] shut up!

- You lie for a piece of baby
dick right here, for real?

- All right, OK. Hey--
- Suck my cunt, Nate.

You told me he had a baby dick.

(overlapping arguing)

I did not tell you because
I am a good person!

Unlike you, you liar.
You fucking liar.

- [Elliott] You are
not a good person.

(arguing)

- You're ugly! Look at you.

You're so ugly.

I mean, look what you've become.

I can't even be around
you, you're so ugly.

- Yup, you got it
Elliot. I'm ugly.

- Yes.
- I'm everything you said and more, you know what

but at least, baby brother, at
least I'm something, Elliott.

At least I'm something.

You, you are no one. I
feel sorry for you.

- Oh, don't. Don't feel sorry for me.
- I feel so sorry for you, boo.

- I feel sorry for you,
don't feel sorry for me.

- You actually think that you
are working with something.

You actually think that
you have some talent.

Really, you've been in the
game for almost a decade now

and you have no receipts, OK?

No credits whatsoever.

You know what Nate? No no no.

His mom made me give up
going to writing school

so that I could go to
the conservatory with him

because they would
not take his sorry ass

unless I came too, cause
they knew he was nothing.

I gave up everything, all my
dreams, for nothing, for no one

hell, they knew he was nothing.

Hell, I knew he was nothing,
your momma know you was nothing

OK and I feel so bad.

Day in and day out you come
into my office asking me for an

appointment as if I would
actually give you an appointment

as if you aren't nothing, as
if you aren't an embarrassment.

You're nothing, you are no one.

- You know what, you've
always been a great writer

and look what you've done with that.
- I've been writing something.

- At least I'm doing me, all right?
- Yes, do you boo.

- And I'm something, I know that I'm something.
- Do nothing boo.

- Yeah, keep telling yourself that.
- What are you doing? You're not even writing.

(overlapping arguing)

- [Nate] Fuck.

(soft electronic music)

(No audio)

- [Janice] What
are you looking at?

- You shouldn't sneak up
on people, little girl.

- First of all, I ain't
sneaking up on nobody

and you shouldn't be in
the middle of the street.

What are you looking at?
- Nothing.

- [Janice] Can I see?
- [Caleb] No.

- Uh, why not?

- Shut up.
- You're so mean.

- Why do you keep talking
to me, little dirty girl?

Don't you have little homeless
friends to go play with or something?

- I don't got no
friends no more.

- Because you stink.

- No, it's because my
momma said I have to leave

this school for a little while
but I got my friends Shika

and Renee, my momma said
they can come over

my house too, so there.

- You should find a police
to take you someplace nice.

- [Janice] I'm OK.

You're the one that
needs to go some place

before you get hit
by a car, dummy.

- Why do you keep talking
to me, little girl?

- My name is not
no "little girl".

My name is Janice. What's yours?

- Satan.
- [Janice] You wanna be my friend?

- No. I don't like you.

- You so silly.

- You stupid.

- You stupid, stupid-head.

- You a stupid head.
- [Janice] You stupid head.

- Stupid stupid-head.

- [Janice]
Stupid-stupid-stupid-head.

- Stupid-stupid-stupid...
(chuckling)

- See? You so silly.

- You're right, I'm
silly and stupid.

- [Janice] You need to
get out of the street

or you'll get hit by
a car and I'll be sad.

- So?

- I'll make you laugh again
if you get out of the street.

I'll make you laugh again.

There's a car coming, you
gotta get out of the street.

Please, please get up! You
gotta get out of the street.

Please, please. Please, please.

(fading)
(ethereal music)

- [Mom] Get off of my child!

What the hell are you doing?

(inaudible)

(car honking)
- Janice!

(siren wailing)

- [TV Lawyer] That's when
you discovered the bodies?

- [TV Witness] I had walked
past the door several times

going to fix stuff at the
other apartments on the floor

and even before that, the
other tenants kept complaining

of the smell and I didn't
think anything of it.

I mean, I had asked her
when I saw her coming out

of the building that there
was maybe a dead mouse

or something in the wall.

I would have never thought...

And she seemed just fine.

I never thought about it.

And then she didn't pay
her electric, I guess

and I had to get into the
apartment and shut it off.

- [Lawyer] Describe
to us the scene

as you entered the
apartment that day.

- [Witness] The smell. I'll
never forget the smell.

And I immediately knew
something was wrong.

I mean, I almost vomited.

I walked to the bedroom,
it was a one bedroom, so...

When I saw those, those bodies

of those kids just laying there

together,

tucked in like they
were going to sleep

and I couldn't even
scream, I just cried

because they looked like...

I cried because they
looked like angels

and I just couldn't
understand how someone could

I mean, to not even bury them they,

They look like angels.

And all I could think was
that she was there every night

for weeks,

sleeping in that one
bedroom apartment

next to,

decomposing angels

just living in that
smell, that stink.

Every day, living
with that stink.

And then I called the police.

- [Lawyer] No further
questions, your honor.

- You got a condom?
- No.

- Do you want me to go get it?
- No.

(soft crying)

(gentle electronic music)

(knocking)

(knocking)

(loud knocking)

(louder knocking)

(tribal music)

- [TV Reporter] We
go now to Shelly Lee

who's bringing us the
latest developments

from outside the
courthouse. Shelly?

- There were still many
signs of grief today

and then signs of relief
and also tears of joy

as New Yorkers received
word that the Monster Mom

had been found guilty on four
counts of first degree murder.

The jurors deliberated
for only an hour today--

- This mimosa is good.

- A specialty.

- Yeah.

- I see they let you keep
that suit from court.

- Yeah, I guess it was
the least they could do

since you're still
walking the streets

and I'm still living on them.

- Yeah, I guess.

- I never hated you
because of everything.

I thought I should,

but I didn't.

Not one bit.

It was like I was,

Like I was relieved, you know?

Like I was actually relieved.

I couldn't take
care of her, right?

I mean, I loved her but I...

I hated her

because when I saw
her I saw everything

that was good and bad
about me, who I was.

I saw it all there
at the same time.

Everything that was wrong,
everything that I did wrong.

It was all there in her.

So when she...

When she left me,

I feel so much better.

So much better.

So I hate myself.

(bitter chuckling)

I already hated myself, shit.

(soft crying)

I hate myself even more.

So I guess I'm like that
Monster Mom on TV, right?

You think,

you think I'm a
monster, don't you?

- Yeah

but I'm a monster too.

- No.

("Tread Softly" by Nhojj)

- [TV Woman] Thank you
Jesus, that they convicted!

Yes, yes! Glory glory glory
glory glory glory glory glory

glory glory glory glory glory
glory glory glory glory glory!

Hallelujah! Yes, Jesus!

- My brother here?

- Look, I have an
audition tomorrow, OK? So.

("I've Been Waiting
for You" by Nhojj)

- [Voiceover] From the moment
you pop out your momma's

vajayjay, you're constantly
going, constantly moving.

You're headed somewhere,
you don't know where.

You don't even always
know that you're in motion

but you're moving, you're
moving, you're growing.

You don't even know it
and you end up places,

many different places for
many different reasons,

some good and some bad.

Some places you get to on
purpose, you wanted to be there.

Some places you end up by
mistake, you took the wrong turn.

Took bad advice, but
everywhere you're at,

you're supposed to be there.

For whatever reason, you're
supposed to be there.

- [Caleb] Kim!

- What do you want, Caleb?

- I want to give you this.

I saw you put out a breakdown--

- You don't work for
me anymore, Caleb.

- I know, and I shouldn't
and you were right

and I'm wrong but just
take this, please?

Thank you.

- [Voiceover] And wherever
we're at at the moment

wherever we're supposed to
be at, it always takes us

a moment to think and
reassess and figure out why.

Why are we there?

- Caleb?

- Alan, how are you?

- Fine.

I'll need four veggie burgers,
no cheese, wrapped in lettuce

toppings on the side.

- [Voiceover] And we leave
where we're at somehow,

anyhow, and we stay in
motion and we don't stop

and we choose to steer
ourselves to more places,

different places,
and we get there.

It might take a few minutes,
it might take many years

but we get to where
we're supposed to be.

The route may not be
clear, the journey may suck

but, we get there

and that journey, our trip,

our many trips to get
to where we need to be,

where we should
be, it's our life.

Our lives. It's everything we
are, everything we want to be,

everything we will be,
everything we were.

It's a mess. It's never ending.

It's crazy. It's incoherent.

It's stupid, it's
maddening, it's awful.

It's wonderful, it's a
tragedy, it's an epiphany.

It's transcendent. It's ugly.

It's everything.
It's everything.

It's all I know.
It's all I write.

It's why I write,
it's how I feel.

I write how I feel, I write
what I know and it's beautiful.

- Come on, come to bed.

God, ain't no body
got money for that.

- I had to finish my story.

- Come on, come to bed.

- No, I have an audition and
then I have to go to work.

- Suit yourself.

(yawning)

You should come too.

You didn't move to the
city to become a super.

- No.

("The Lullaby" by Nhojj)

- [Shelly] Emotions are
running high all over New York

and particularly here
in this neighborhood

where the Monster Mom lived
with her four children

who are all now
dead by her hand.

We're here today looking
for reactions from everyone.

Excuse me, any reaction to
the Monster Mom sentencing?

Any comment?

What about your fiancé, Elliott,
how does he feel about the

sentencing, having been the
one to discover the girls?

Does he have any
sense of relief?

Any comment from Elliott?

Cut it.

- OK, may I please have
Jack McKnight, Anthony

and Spencer Wong,
line up for 16 bars.

Everyone else,
thank you so much.

- [Girl] Why'd you stop writing?

- I got stuck.

- [Girl] You told
me it was real easy.

- It is real easy,
it's easy to start.

- How do you start?

- You just write what
you feel, I guess.

Finishing is hard.

- I don't know what
you're talking about.

Why won't you let me see?

- I'll let you see
when I'm finished.

- Uh, how long will that be?

- Uh, I'm in no rush.

- Uh.
- Uh.

- You so silly.

- You're silly.

- You promise I can see--

- I promise you can
see, little girl.

- My name is not
no "little girl".

It's Janice.

- I promise you can see, Janice.

- I'm going to write and
be an actor and be like you

when I grow up and do movies
and be pretty like Halle Barry

and marry me a white man
like, my grandma says,

so my babies can have
pretty eyes and pretty hair.

- Your babies will be
cute just like you're cute

no matter who you marry, OK?

And you don't want
to be like me.

Halle Barry maybe, but not me.

- Yes, I do. You silly.

- [Mom] Janice, come and
get these groceries girl.

I hope she's not bothering you.

- Naw, she's my
little writing buddy.

- Yeah, I'm his writing buddy.

- Come on girl,
get in this house.

Come on, gal.

(door closing)

("The Lullaby" by Nhojj)

(door closing)

("Wade in the Water" by Nhojj)