Stunts (1977) - full transcript

Expert stuntman Glen Wilson is called in to finish stunts for a movie plagued by production problems. It turns out that his younger brother Greg, also a stuntman, was killed in an accident during filming or so it seemed. En route to the shooting location, he picks up B.J. Parswell, an ambitious journalist who's doing a story on stuntmen. Things get hairy when his stuntmen pals are getting killed one by one during the stunts.

RADIO HOST (VOICEOVER): Good
morning, San Luis Obispo.

It's 6 AM on this fine
Wednesday morning.

And we're here at Radio--

[RADIO CLICKS OFF]

[MOTORCYCLE REVVING]

[MUSIC PLAYING]

-Glad you could make it.

ALVIN: Earl, can I
see you a minute?

EARL: Later, Blake.

How long will it take you?

-Quick as I get dressed.
EARL: All right.



Let's get going.

Help him get dressed.

-Let me give you
a hand with that.

-Hey, thanks.

-We're still waiting, gentlemen.

MAN: All cameras standby.

-Let's do it.

-Good luck.

-Thank you.

-Good luck, man.

MAN: Crazy son of a bitch.

EARL: Mark it up.

-Hey!

[INAUDIBLE]



-All right.

This is a big one [INAUDIBLE].

Let's get it right.

MAN: Come on, speed it up.

WOMAN: Hi, Judy.

MAN: Billy, we're ready to go.

-OK.

Paul, let's go over
it one more time.

You're going to [INAUDIBLE]
me at 20 and 25, right?

-All right.

Soon as I get it
lined out, I'm going

to give you the high sign.

And you go ahead
and make the move.

-OK.

Let's make it a good one, huh?

EARL (ON WALKIE TALKIE):
Greg, this is Earl.

Are you ready?

We're standing by.

-All right, Earl.

We're ready.

-OK.

Cameras ready.

-Standing by.

-Do we have speed?

CAMERAMAN: Speed.

Cameras rolling.

EARL: Action!

[INAUDIBLE]

[TIRES SQUEALING]

HELICOPTER PILOT:
The car is lined up.

EARL: It's a go.

No abort.

HELICOPTER PILOT:
[INAUDIBLE] the car.

MAN: Cancel.

HELICOPTER PILOT:
I'm closing on him.

Easy.

I got him.

-He's made the connect.

HELICOPTER PILOT:
Climbing to 1500.

He's [INAUDIBLE] the hook now.

-[INAUDIBLE].

CAMERAMAN: Camera
two, coming in.

-Hey!

HELICOPTER PILOT:
What's wrong, Greg?

GREG: The hook is jammed!

I can't close it!

Get me down!

-Bring him down.

Do you copy?

HELICOPTER PILOT:
Roger. [INAUDIBLE].

-My arm!

MAN: Take her down
faster, damn it.

-Bring him down!

Bring him down!

-Damn it!

MAN: [INAUDIBLE].

-Jack, will you listen to
me for a second, please?

I know we're a week
behind schedule.

-What is the big deal here?

We've got a simple
chase picture.

SWAT teams, car chases,
lots of violence.

-Jack, will you listen
to me for a second?

-That Daddy?

-Now, look.

Look, Blake.

Don't get me wrong.

Now, we're all still with you.

-Jack, look.

I got to get these stunts,
or I don't have a picture.

I mean, I got an action film
where a stuntman really dies.

People are going
to pay to see that.

-You know, I hope for your
sake you're right, Blake.

Don't forget.

You got those four big
scenes to shoot in five days.

-Now, listen.

Listen.

I'm going to stay as
close to budget as I can.

I'm going to keep this
thing under control

and bring it in for you.

Now, trust me.

-It's your ass, Blake.

Oh, and kiss Judy for me.

-You're beautiful.

You're beautiful.

I'll talk to you later.

-What did you mean
when you said,

without stunts you
don't have a picture?

I mean, what do I look
like, a head-on collision?

-I'm just trying to buy
time for you, honey.

I mean, a few extra scenes
aren't going to hurt you.

-Well, why didn't you
just tell Daddy that?

-Because Daddy had a room full
of executives, and executives

know from stunts.

They don't know from talent.

Understand?

MECHANIC: Damn foreign cars.

-How long is it going
to take you to fix it?

-Oh, four, five hours.

I have to go get the parts.

-OK.

Go ahead.

-All right.

-Hey, buddy.

You get a second, you want
to jump on those windshields.

-Sure.

-Excuse me.

Are you going to
San Luis Obispo?

-Yeah.

-Could I get a ride?

I'm willing to pay you?

-Pay me?

How much?

-$5, $10?

I don't know.

-I'd take $30.

-$30?

I can get a taxi for $30.

-Well, in the world I live
in, lady, if you can't fix it,

you don't drive it.

-Chauvinist.

-What do you want me
to do with the car?

-Uh, when you're
finished with it,

can you drop it off
at the Madonna Inn.

-Sure.

-You can just toss
those any place in back.

-$30 for a goddamn truck.

EARL: And cut!

-Is that a print?

MAN: [INAUDIBLE] please.

MAN: 166.

-Can you fellas
live with that gag?

MAN: Sounds OK.

-Yeah, it was fine.

-Well, I can't.

We'll do it again.

Pete, Chuck, come on back here.

MAN: First position.

MAN: [INAUDIBLE].

MAN: [INAUDIBLE] reloading.

-You dazzle me.

You fellas really dazzle me.

But it didn't work.

The damn thing didn't work.

We need a better
impact, bigger jerk.

[INAUDIBLE]

-Hey, I'll tell you whether
I need a bigger jerk or not.

-Chuck, anytime you
don't want to do a stunt,

all you've got to
do is let me know.

-I just don't want Pete here
trying to kill me, is all.

EARL: Listen, if it'll make
the stunt work, I'm interested.

-You're the director.

What the hell is this thing?

-Nitrogen wrench.

-Oh yeah?

Has anybody tested it yet?

-I heard about that.

Yeah.

It's safe as a cradle.

Don't worry.

-Yeah.

But it's not as soft, so it's
going to cost you another $50.

Because I'm in this for
the money, not the pain.

-How come you're in such a
hurry to get to San Luis?

-They're shooting
a movie up there--

doing some big action sequences.

I'm a writer.

I'm doing an
article on stuntmen.

-For who?

-Oh, something called
"Action Magazine."

-Say something you wrote
that I might have read.

-Well, most of the time I
write for literary quarterlies

and psychology magazines--
New York stuff.

I doubt if you'd have read it.

-How'd you get this job?

-Well, the idea
is that stuntmen,

basically they're very boring
people apart from their work.

I'd like to really get into
the psychological attitude

behind the work.

-I don't get you.

-Well, for instance,
on this movie,

there was a stuntman,
a guy called

Greg Wilson, who got
killed a few days ago.

Well, that's good maybe
for a few paragraphs.

But why he did it-- you
know, the recklessness

behind doing a stunt like
that-- that's a good story.

-That's a real interesting
slant you got on things, lady.

-You really think so?

-No, I don't look.

But then, I'm a stuntman.

And that vain, reckless boor
you described as having gotten

killed-- that was my brother.

MAN: Get him hooked up.

MAN: Couldn't pay me to do this.

MAN: Lace him up tight, there.

Moving back to one.

MAN: Watch your back, please.

MAN: That ought
to hold anything.

MAN: Easy, easy.

MAN: Wait'll you feel 500
pounds tugging at you.

-Action!

[POLICE SIREN]

[GUNSHOTS]

EARL: Pete, stand by!

And-- [INAUDIBLE].

-Jesus christ!

Are you out of
your goddamn mind?

EARL: And cut!

-[INAUDIBLE].

-It was worth at
least $100 in pain.

-Brilliant, Pete.
Brilliant.

Spectacular, Paul.

Spectacular.

Thank you very much.

-Spectacular, huh?

Yes.

-Spectacular.

MAN: Hey, come on!

Hey!

-What's the matter with you?

Are you crazy or something?

-He's the one who's crazy.

He doesn't give a
goddamn about any of us.

All he gives a damn about is
his goddamn special defects.

-You all right?

You look good.

Don't worry about it.

The girls are going to love you.

-Whoa!

Hey, you stupid son
of a bitch, man.

Where'd you get your
license at, McDonald's?

[LAUGHING]

-Wally.

-Hey.

Hey, look who's here.

It's Mr. Cool!

-Take it easy, writer lady.

-Hey, Glen.

How are you?

-Hello, Red.

How you doing?

-Fussing and fighting.

-Glad you're here, Glen.

-What happened?

-What can we say?

He was one of us.

A brother.

-Nobody can do that stunt, Glen.

It's too tough.

-Bullshit, baby.

That's just a
difference of opinion.

-Hey, buddy.

I was driving the car.

And he couldn't do
the stunt because he

couldn't make the hookup.

-If he couldn't have
done the stunt, Paul,

he wouldn't have tried it.

The dicey part's not the hookup,
anyway-- it's the connect.

PAUL: What are you saying?

-What he's saying is
he's going to go for it.

-That's right, Jack.

I'm going to check
things out here and then

go talk to the
producer about that.

See you in a bit.

-So long, Glen.

-Hey, Glen.

Wait a minute.

Hey, uh-- who's the
new pit tootsie?

-You noticed her.

-She's got great lips.

-She's a writer from the East.

She's doing a story about us.

-Ah.

So I wouldn't be
horning in if I--

-No.

No, go ahead.

She's too fast for me.

PAUL: Yeah?

She don't look the type.

-She's hot.

You better watch out.

She'll cover you like mold.

-Yeah.

-Hey, Pauly.

-Yeah?

-You know what they call her?

-What?

-BJ.

-Hey, uh.

Want to take a picture
of a real hot stuntman?

-Sure.

-All right.

Anytime you're ready.

-OK.

-Wait a minute.

-OK.

-You know, uh-- I'm
better in the flesh

than I am in photographs.

-Really?

-I'm Italian.

Italians are the best
lovers in the world.

Did you know that?

-Well, I tell you what.

Why don't you get a
couple of other Italians,

come to my room, and
we'll have a little party.

-What do you mean, a couple?

What do you mean a couple more?

-Two more guys.

Isn't that a real party?

-What, do you think I'm a sicko?

-What's the matter?

You've never been
with two girls before?

-Hey, two girls is fun.

Two guys is queer.

-In the movie business?

-You're warped, you know that?

You're real sick.

[LAUGHS]

-Honey?

Glen!

Good to see you.

Welcome aboard.

-Thank you, Alvin.

-My wife, Judy, the
star of this epic.

Glen Wilson, our new
stunt coordinator.

-Hi, Glen.

Nice to meet you.

-Sit down.

JUDY: It was awful
about your brother.

I'm so sorry.

-Honey, I'm sure Glen knows
how we feel about his brother.

Listen, why don't you go to your
room and memorize your lines.

-What?

-I know you know them.

We just want to talk
some business here.

-OK, fine.

I'm sure I'll be
seeing you again, Glen.

-See you later.

How about a drink?

-Let's talk business.

-Good.

Did you come up with a
blockbuster gag for me?

-Alvin, there
ain't nothing wrong

with the stunt you've got.

-Everything is wrong with
a gag that kills people.

-That stunt was in my
brother's mind for years.

He knew it.

-So what happened?

-I don't know.

But I'm going to do that stunt.

-Look, I don't want this picture
to become a personal proving

ground for anybody,
for any reason.

You got me getting
serious, here.

Are we making a movie,
or are we making a movie?

Come on.

-You just think about it, Alvin.

I'm sure you're going like it.

-I've already thought about it.

The answer's no.

Flat out, no.

-I'm glad you agree with me.

Let me have drink.

-Miss.

EARL (VOICEOVER):
Help him get dressed.

GREG (VOICEOVER): Let's do it.

EARL (VOICEOVER): Good luck.

We're standing by.

GREG (VOICEOVER): OK,
let's make a good one, huh?

EARL (VOICEOVER): Action!

Bring him down!

Bring him down!

It's not working.

Come on, get him d--

[SCREAM]

WOMAN: Right behind you.

-Where are they going?

-Stuntman dies, he gets
a stuntman's funeral.

-Adios, my man!

-To tomorrow.

PAUL: What's so
special about tomorrow?

-Nothing, I hope.

No bruises, no broken
bones, no nothing.

-Keep making the stunts tougher,
people are going to get hurt.

-Yeah.

You guys heard about what
about happened to Bobby Rogers,

right?

Car rolls right
over him in a gag.

So he's laying up in a hospital.

He's never going
to be able to talk.

He's never going
to be able to walk.

He's a vegetable.

-In that condition, I'd
just assume push right

on through to the other side.

-Living like that's
like living dead.

-Worse.

You might wake up.

-Yeah.

But even worse, Bobby
doesn't have a choice.

-Why don't we make a deal, man?

All right?

If one of us takes
it in the shorts,

the others pull the plug.

-I'm in.

-Let's all agree, all around.

-I'm in, too.

Yeah.

-[INAUDIBLE].

-Let's wing it.

-When's this ramp
going to be ready?

-10 minutes, more or less.

Plenty of extra hammers.

Right, Pauly?

-Let's go.

Let's go.

Can we move it, please?

-Bring it over here.

MAN: [INAUDIBLE].

MAN: Yeah, he's in the truck.

MAN: Give me a hand, here.

-Howdy.

You a stuntman?

-Yeah, I been known
to wreck a few things.

-Yeah, I thought about
being a stuntman.

You ever see anybody bust a beer
can in half with their nose?

See?

I got guts.

I could be a stuntman.

How about giving
me a chance, huh?

-Hey, kid.

When we do the scene
where the guy breaks

the can over his
nose, we'll call you.

-Hey.

That's good.

That's terrific.

You got a good dentist?

-That's it, now.

Just keep them apart.

All right?

[INAUDIBLE]

-Come on.

Let's roll.

We'll give you three
whistles, and then you go.

GLEN: Got it.

-Everybody got it?

MAN: Yo.

-Three whistles.

MAN: You got it.

-Can you give me a
lift up to the camera?

-Sure.

-Thanks.

-Here.

Why don't you just put those in?

BJ: Oh, I see.

-There you go.

That's right.

Lock them in [INAUDIBLE].

OK.

[THREE WHISTLES]

-Do you have to drive so fast?

-Oh my god.

Hey, come on.

Slow down.

Please slow down!

Jeez, stop!

Please, stop!

EARL: And cut!

[APPLAUSE]

-[INAUDIBLE]

-Yeah.

-Yeah?

Super roll.

Just super.

Beautiful.

[LAUGHTER]

-Welcome to the club.

How'd you like it?

-You stupid son of a bitch.

-I thought she'd love it.

RECEPTIONIST (ON
PHONE): Front desk.

-Messages for room 131, please.

-Hi.

Nice room.

RECEPTIONIST (ON
PHONE): All clear, sir.

-Thank you.

-Nice, uh, bed.

-Hasn't failed me yet.

-Why don't you go
ahead and change?

I'm not going to go anywhere.

-Maybe you ought to go
back to your husband.

-Why?

Greg wasn't afraid of him.

-Greg had one rule.

No married women.

-We both had rules.

And we both broke them.

And let me tell you, it was
worth every minute of it.

I know what you're thinking.

But Greg and I were
very, very close.

-Then what are you doing here?

-Well, you can't
blame me for wondering

if certain traits
run in the family.

-You're not hard up, are you?

-No.

I'm not.
-What do you like?

Causing trouble?

-I told you.

I was hoping for a
copy of the original.

-Mm mm.

-OK.

Fine, Glen.

I guess the original is
always better than a fake.

-Hey, goomba.

-Hey.

-Where's the harness?

-Hey, man.

Don't torture yourself.

--[INAUDIBLE], if I'm
going to do the stunt,

I gotta see the harness.

I want to see what went wrong.

-What went wrong, man,
was that he couldn't make

the hookup under
those conditions.

-How do you know?

How do you know somebody
didn't screw around with it?

-Well, because one of
us would have noticed.

-In that case,
where's the harness?

-It's in his room with
the rest of the gear.

-No it ain't.

-Hey, wait.

Wait a minute.

Where you going?

-I got a gag to set up.

Are we making a movie,
or are we making a movie?

-OK.

Get her in there.

-She's too long, Pete.

-The chase cars'll
be heading east.

-All right, seal it up good.

We don't want the
compression from the charge

leaking out the sides.

MAN: That camera in there solid?

EARL: Get this car
into the garage

so we can load the dynamite.

-Glen's not home.

-I know that.

And stop spying on me.

-Then stop making it necessary.

Come on, get in.

We're going to the
cannon roll location.

-It's good from up here.

-What you got in there?

-All right.

You got five and a half ounces.

That'll give you three rolls
exactly at 40 miles an hour.

-What do we need for five?

-You don't want to do five.

-How much?

-Look, you start loading
that much powder under you,

and things get scary.

I can't guarantee
what'll happen.

You may get five, you may
get six, you may get four.

There's no telling where the
hell you're gonna end up.

-We give ourselves
plenty of room.

-There's also a
possibility of getting

your ass blown sky high.

-Give me 15.

-OK, Superman.

Runs in the family, doesn't it?

-Is he right?

-If he is, you got a hell
of a story, don't you, lady?

-Can I ask you a question?

How would you say
your work differs

from that of a
professional athlete?

-Who says it does?

-Well, I don't know.

I mean, a professional
athlete gets

all the money and the glory.

And you get the money.

But the glory goes to the actor.

-Ain't that the truth, lady?

-OK.

Should we talk about
you, specifically?

You were a college
professor, I believe.

-Who told you that?

-Well, I did a little research.

You know, picked
a few things up.

It is my job.

[BELCHES]

-All right.

We're going in ten minutes.

-Uh, excuse me.

You did the special effects on
a picture called "Red Flame."

-Yeah, that's right.

-I believe two men
got killed on that.

-Yeah. [INAUDIBLE].

-Oh, I see.

That makes it OK, does it?

-Look, darling, I
only rig the stunts.

I don't operate them.

-I hear you're having
a little trouble

with your boys on this picture.

Is that true?

-How's it look, Chuck?

All right, pull it up.

That's it.

-Yeah, good.

EARL: You set?

GLEN: Do I looks set?

-The automatic
transmission's slipping.

I have to pull out with
my foot on the break.

-Double the hero, and
they give you a Ferrari.

-Listen, Glen.

I need this one.

-You need every one
you can get, pal.

-Make me look good, will you?

MAN: Hey, Paul.

You guys ready?

-Yo.

MAN: [INAUDIBLE] my man.

EARL: Let's do it, Chuck.

MAN: Let's kick the
living stuffings

out of [INAUDIBLE] baby!

-[INAUDIBLE].

-Everybody freeze.

Keep that camera rolling.

If he's dead, we can't help him.

And if he's hurt, 15
seconds won't matter much.

[CHEERING]

EARL: And cut!

-All right!

Yeah!

That was something else.

-[INAUDIBLE], man.

-Did you see that [INAUDIBLE].

-How'd it look?

-Well, I can live with it.

But don't let it
go to your head.

-Just like my old man.

A real putz.

-Pop my knee back,
will you, son?

[SNAP]

Thank you.

-One of these days this
knee ain't going to go back.

Then they're gonna
know I ain't Superman.

-For a minute, I thought
you went past it.

But you just punched it,
right at the right moment.

-How many rolls did we get?

-Like five and a half.

But it must have
felt like about 15.

The cannon head went
way out in the field,

over the other camera crew.

-Hey, you're Glen, right?

Hey, that was really terrific.

Really.

I couldn't have
done better, myself.

My name's Dave.

-Dave.

-Watch this.

Let's say my hands are
tied behind my back.

-Yeah.

-OK, now.

Take a punch at me.

-Who put him up to this?

-No.

No, really.

Really, fake a punch at me.

-He takes a lot of damage
on his face, don't he?

-What do you think?

-I think you're crazy, buddy.

-So can I work for you.

-Not in this lifetime.

-Give him a break.

-You be willing to wash stuff?

Clean up equipment?

-Hey, you name it, I'll do it.

-Come on.

-[INAUDIBLE].

[DOOR SLAMMING]

-What are you doing here?

-What do you expect?

You've been acting very
suspiciously lately.

-I have?

-Oh, I've see you sneaking
into the stunt van,

rummaging around, sneaking
into Paul's truck.

-Lady, I don't have
to sneak any place.

-Hey, I don't blame you.

God knows, it wouldn't be very
difficult to sabotage a stunt.

Even I could do it.

-I don't believe you, lady.

You're here 24
hours, and you know

everything about
everything, don't you.

-Well, maybe I do.

-Maybe you don't.

-Personally, I suspect
your special effects

guy, Pete Lustig.

-What reason you got to
suspect anybody of anything.

-Look, you just came off a movie
where they were offering you

twice as much money as you're
getting on this picture.

-I'm crazy, lady.

I'm bedrock crazy.

Don't forget that.

-Anything you say.

-Why do you suspect Pete Lustig?

-You see?

You do believe me.

-I don't believe anything
you've got to say.

In fact, I'm sorry I asked.

-I'm ready here.

You want to start it up?

I'll double check
the other side, too.

Yeah, it seems OK.

-Come with me.

-Now?

It's, uh, lunchtime.

-Are you hungry?

-Oh, I might be talked
into a bite or two.

-Chuck.

If we make love now,
we can make that baby.

-Hey.

Thanks a lot.

When did you drop the pill?

And why didn't you tell me?

-We agreed last week
I could get pregnant.

So I stopped taking the pill.

-We agreed when we
were settled down.

You call this settled down?

We have a kid now, we're going
to have to have him on wheels.

-When the picture's over,
we'll be settled down.

Oh, I know.

You were offered
another picture, right?

-Right.

But I didn't take it.

-You called back and you said
that you'd think about it.

-Right.

What am I supposed to do when
they keep upping the money?

-You're supposed
to say that you're

a responsible,
married man, Chuck.

And then start acting like one.

-I am a responsible married man.

I'm just as
responsible as anybody.

-[INAUDIBLE].

WOMAN: Anyone got
the makeup case?

MAN: Over here.

-Any problem with
these blowers so far?

-Seems OK.

-Did you, uh, inspect every
seam like I asked you to?

-Yes, sir.

-I--I had to shake out
the vent a little bit,

but it's coming
in all right now.

-This is one piece
of equipment I

don't want to have malfunction.

Had a seam blow on me last
year, and I went right through.

-What happened?

-Well, managed to walk away.

But it sure knocked
the stuffing out of me.

Don't want that to happen today.

Just keep inflating.

You can't overdo it.

-OK.

Here's what I want.

Glen, Paul, Patti.

I want you three repelling up.

Chuck, you're on the roof.

At that point, you throw
up three rounds to Paulie.

Paulie, you get
hit in the chest.

You die on the
ropes right there.

And then the ground
fire gets you.

You take your call.

-I'll have to take my own cue.

That's all right.

You're gonna be covered
with four cameras, anyway.

-Yeah, I'll swing over
and get Paul then.

-And then if you need
help, you call on Glen.

And then you both
can come on down.

Now, this is a big stunt.

And I want it done right.

Got it?
-Yeah, we got it.

Three up.

One down.

-Happy landings.

-Sensitive guy, huh?

-Sweet luck, Charlie.

-Take care of your
face, Chuckie-poo.

What are you looking at?

-I'll see you in a minute, hoss.

-Double check those
carabiner clips.

MAN: [INAUDIBLE].

PAUL: Where's my other glove?

-[INAUDIBLE], will you?

-OK.

Now, move it in.

-Get that as tight as you can.

-Let's shoot it.

-Is it all right?

-Yeah.

I think so.

GLEN: How'd the
kid do on the bag?

PAUL: Bag's OK.

So's the kid.

-You guys set?

-Check.

I'm straight.

[YELLING]

GLEN: Pauly.

Talk to that kid, will you?

-I got it.

I got it.

Hey, [SPEAKING ITALIAN]
Jesus christ.

What's the matter with you, man?

We get $1,500 a jump.

And you're giving it away.

[INTERPOSING VOICES]

-Who is he?
Who is he?

-How'd you like the fall?

Pretty good stunt, huh?

-Listen, you dumb
jaboney, I ought

to kick your ass
right off this set.

-Sorry, I--

-Sorry won't pay for the time
we'll lose resetting this bag.

Now, next time you want to do
a jump, do it without the bag.

All right, everybody.

Take ten minutes.

We're on a break.

-I thought you were on our side.

-Sorry, I-- sorry.

-I got this new honey.

She's waiting in the van for me.

Ten minutes isn't much time.

But I'm going to give it a shot.

-Watch out for the husband.

-Give me a [INAUDIBLE],
would you, Glen?

-Hey, uh, hon?

These, uh, sledgehammers,
they just aren't going away.

-How about if I get
you some aspirin, hon?

-Thanks, I appreciate that.

-OK.

See you in a minute.

-Tough break, Chuck.

-Yeah.

Hey, uh, Glen?

How about if you do
the high fall, and, uh,

I take the repel?

-You're getting
$800 for the stunt.

You got a hangover that bad?

-Well, it, uh, wasn't
just the hangover.

I, uh, had a bad
experience up there.

I looked down, and I just knew
I was going to buy the farm.

-All right.

That's not a feeling
we're going to argue with.

Change clothes.

-Thanks, pal.

EARL: Action!

[INAUDIBLE] now.

And try to stay together.

Patti, you're getting
too far ahead.

That's better!

OK.

Keep it together now.

You're good!

Together!

-I can't hold on.

I can't hold on much longer!

-Just grab me!

-I can't do it!

-[INAUDIBLE]!

[YELLING]

-Oh, Chuck!

GLEN: Get an ambulance!

-He's alive.

-How is he.

-He's on a respirator.

He has a complete fracture
of the cervical spine.

His diaphragm is paralyzed.

I'm afraid that he will
always be on a respirator.

-No.

BJ: It's OK.

-No.

-It's OK.

-Impossible.

-I'm sorry.

-I'm sorry, kid.

-Come on.

I'll take you.

-All right.

I'll flip you for it.

Heads.

-Tails.

-This ain't for us, Chuck.

Talked to the doctor.

Said you're busted
up pretty good.

Says you're alive.

That ain't much, Chuck.

I talked to Patti.

She's all right.

Ain't nobody crying and moaning.

They're all right, too.

Doc says if you ever wake
up, you ain't gonna move.

That's why I'm here, Chuck.

Deal's a deal.

If it was me, I'd expect
you to do the same thing.

There ain't nothing
in my life I've

been afraid of except being
where you are right now.

I just didn't expect
it to be this tough.

Sweet luck, baby.

Sweet luck.

[FLATLINE BEEP]

[MUSIC PLAYING]

-Give me another drink, honey.

This business.

This whole goddamn,
stinking business stinks.

-Stinks.

Stinks like dog shit.

-You and the other stuntmen.

You think it's great.

You love every minute of it.

And you and Glen are
going to get out there

tomorrow and do the same thing.

You're all alike.

You're crazy.

-Maybe, baby.

But you're going to be
right there with us.

Because you're
crazy, too, Patti.

-Give me another one, honey.

-I think you've had enough.

-Who are you to tell me
that I've had enough?

-I'm just somebody who cares.

You don't care.

You don't know how to care.

You can still walk, Paulie!

-Come here!

-Through with them
Hollywood faggots, baby?

-I hate you!

I hate all of you!

Sorry.

-Would you go after
myself, or Glen?

-No, I guess not.

-She's one of us.

Capiche?

Kitten.

Let's go dance.

[DOG HOWLING]

-Where are you?

-Who says I'm here?

-Nosy broad like you.

[INAUDIBLE]

-I haven't checked
the equipment yet.

-Why not?

-I don't really
know how it works.

-What are you doing here, then?

-Just making sure
nobody else checks it.

-How's Chuck?

-He's dead.

-You know that whoever meant
to kill him meant to kill you.

-Mm hm.

-Well, then why isn't anybody
going to get the police?

-Because it's not the
way we handle things.

We take care of our own.

Want to have a drink?

-Yeah, OK.

-Say what you want.

-I'll have a Virgin
Mary, please.

-Virgin Mary?

I thought you came out
to do some drinking.

-It always has to be
a contest, doesn't it?

-Hey, goomba.

I mean, uh, we look like
a pair of aces, or what?

-You look like a
full house to me.

-I'll have a bottle of tequila,
some limes, and two glasses,

please.

-[SPEAKING ITALIAN]

Did you know that water
beds are good for your back?

Hey!

Hey!

Hey, what are you doing?

My god, it finally happened.

-Honey!

We didn't do nothing.

I promise!

I love you, honey!

-You got quite a
setup here, boy.

-Now, wait a minute.

Wait a minute!

-You want to play, eh?

PAUL: Listen!

-Well, you're going to pay.

-You really don't want
to do this, you know?

I mean, you guys got a lot of
juice in the White House now.

And you don't want to
give Jimmy a bad name.

-You better start praying, boy.

-No, wait a minute!

REDNECK: I mean now.

Wait a minute!

REDNECK: I mean now!

Now!

Come on, trash.

-Redneck!

GLEN: Can you handle
the [INAUDIBLE], baby?

BJ: Oh, sure.

GLEN: There we go.

-You know, when you're
a judge's daughter,

you have to-- you have
to drink with the boys.

Level up to the [INAUDIBLE].

-I'll buy that.

-Well, listen, it's your fault.

You know, you got
me drunk at the bar.

I mean, it's, uh--
it's your fault.

-I'm a regular little
devil about things.

-I bet you are.

-Yes.

Here we go.

Another couple of steps.

That'll do, Patti.

-[INAUDIBLE]?

-I think so.

-Oh, god.

-You all right?

-Yeah.

Find my key.

You know, it's amazing when
I--when I have a drink.

And I feel, uh--
quite wide awake.

-Well, you're a
very unusual woman.

-Oh, thank you.

-Should I do that for you?

-Oh, thank you.

Oh, I-- I'm sorry.

-It's all right.

-Thank you for a
[INAUDIBLE] evening.

BJ: What's it like?

GLEN: What's what like?

BJ: The helicopter stunt.

GLEN: Oh.

Well it's-- noisy, windy.

You know.

BJ: Tell me.

Tomorrow?

GLEN: Yep.

BJ: Why do you
automatically rule out

Paul and Patti as the killers?

I don't understand.

GLEN: They're stunt people.

BJ: Are you telling me there's
no professional jealousy

in your business?

No competition?

I mean, what century
are you living in?

GLEN: The one before women
learned how to talk, doll.

-Well, you only want me to
tell you what you want to hear.

Is that it?

-You don't know
what I want to hear.

-Well, do you want to hear that
I actually worry about you?

Hm?

That I'm afraid for you.

-You can say that
if you want to.

However, don't dwell on it.

-Would you like to
know what conclusion

I came to in my article?

-Sure.

-Well, I think that what you
do is search for the truth.

You can't bullshit a stunt.

It either works or it doesn't.

-Very heavy.

How are you at the truth?

-Pretty good, I think.

-Well, in that case,
let me say this.

I can't promise you anything.

I can't promise you this thing
isn't just a one night stand.

-OK.

But don't dwell on it.

-What happened, Pete?

-I don't know.

-The fastener was loose, right?

-No.

-What do you mean no?

We just saw this poor
bastard fall six stories!

-Now, you listen to me.

Now, you-- goddamn
it, you listen to me.

I've done a dozen
of these pictures.

I'm the best in my profession.

I've been nominated 3 times.

And I won an award.

You don't lay this thing on me.

That piton pin is still up there
in the wall where I left it.

We checked it.

Everything was fine--
including the carabiner clip.

-Until it wasn't.

-It's one big express ride back
down to the street, eh, Pete?

-Well, he should
have checked it!

-Come on, Glen.

This place is starting to smell.

MAN: 123 echo, take two.

EARL: Everybody ready?

MAN: Standing by.

EARL: Are you ready, Judy?

-Yes, yes, yes.

EARL: OK.

Camera.

MAN: Cameras rolling.

EARL: And action, Judy.

-It's not that I didn't
recognize you at first.

I did.

But it was just that
the g-- gosh, sorry.

-Keep the camera rolling.

Go on back and do
it again, dear.

MAN: 350.

EARL: The camera's
still rolling.

Are you ready, Judy?

OK.

-It's not that I didn't
recognize you at first.

It's just that I thought
that what's-- who

the hell wrote this crap?

-Keep the camera rolling.

This is it.

This is the one, Judy, dear.

Come on.

[SCREAMS]

MAN: Oh my god!

EARL: I don't believe this.

MAN: Who the hell is that?

-Woo!

Hey, did you see that?

Must've been about 100 yards.

-Look what you did
to my rig, man!

DAVE: Perfect two
wheeler, wasn't it?

PAUL: Beautiful.
Beautiful.

Notice where you wound up?

Cute.

PAUL: Very nice.

PAUL: Yeah, real nice.

That's a $600 car.

-Well, at least nobody got hurt.

GLEN: This time.

-Isn't that what it takes?

It was a good stunt.

You guys are crazy.

-Hey.

You got a wreck in the
middle of the street.

Get it out of here.

ALVIN: What the hell's going on?

I turn my back for a minute,
you got a car in the street.

Wait just a minute.

I want to talk to you.

Excuse us, will you?

The hell is this about
firing Pete Lustig?

I'm the producer around here.

I fire people.

-Pete Lustig is beginning
to bother my ass.

-That's no excuse to fire a man.

-I got the fire gag coming up.

I don't trust him.

-Wait a minute.

Wait a minute.

In the first place, there's no
proof the man's incompetent.

In the second
place, I got no time

to get another
special effects crew.

Help me, please.

I need a safe stunt.

Help me out.

-We got a stunt.

-The chopper gag.

I don't need that gag.

-It's safe.

I tell you, I worked
the thing out.

-That's what your brother said.

-You want the gag, you do it.

Otherwise, you
hire somebody else.

-Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.

All right.

All right.

All right.

All right, do it.

And Lustig stays.

-If he screws up, I'm
coming after your ass.

-All right.

Come after my ass.

I love it.

But give me a stunt.

Give me a big stunt.

A blockbuster.

I want them to
sit there and hold

their breaths till
their faces turn blue.

I want them to fall
down in their seats.

That's what I need.

A blockbuster.

I know you can do it.

Thank you.

[YELLING]

[INAUDIBLE] street!

Are we making a movie,
or are we making a movie?

-Listen, Marie.

Why don't we take you first,
since you're older by a week.

Am I right?

-Uh, how about me?

Don't I get a ride.

-Well, uh, I didn't think
that you, uh, dug motorcycles.

-Well, they're
sexy, aren't they?

-Excuse me, honey.

I want to, you know-- she's
an old friend of mine.

I want to take her for a ride.

I'll be right back, OK?

Be right back.

How are you, honey?

I haven't seen you
in a long time.

-I'm fine.

Good.

-All right.

Be back in a couple
minutes, all right?

JACK (ON PHONE): What's
going on up there, Blake?

You working for a studio
or a funeral home?

-Jack, we've got two
dead stuntmen on film.

You know that.

It's going to make
the publicity campaign

I initiated even stronger.

-Something you're not
telling me, Blake?

I mean, because if this one
doesn't work, you're out.

-It's going to work, Jack.

I tell you, it's going to work.

Now, listen.

A disaster on the
set is every inch

as strong as a disaster on film.

I know that.

-And I know that we can't
have any more dead stuntmen.

-Jack, are we making a movie,
or are we making a movie?

JACK (ON PHONE): Just get
this damn picture finished.

You won't be the first
son-in-law I've fired.

-Right, right, right.

-Did Daddy say how I
looked in the dailies.

-He said you looked fabuloso.

-Liar.

All he cares about
is the stunts.

-Judy, baby--

-Don't Judy baby me.

He doesn't give a
damn about acting,

and you and I both know it.

-Your Daddy loves you.

And he's proud of you.

-Well, I'm not.

-What?

-Nothing.

-Where are you going?

-Out.

-What for.

-I don't know.

-A little piece of paper, eh?

-That's right.

So we got to be real
careful from here on out.

-Oh.

Look how easy it is
to jimmy this gag.

-Yeah, it makes it easy to
look like an accident, too.

What about my husband?

-Ironic.

-You mean they were
trying to get you?

Yo.

So that means whoever it
is had to have close access

to the gear, and had to
be close to the stunts.

PATTI: And that makes a lot
of people around here suspect.

PAUL: Well, why don't we
just close down set, man?

PAUL: If we close down,
we never know who or why.

-You're up.

-Let's do it.

MAN: Get those wires down.

MAN: Going as fast
as they can, buddy.

BJ: What's that
he's putting on now?

PAUL: We call it
underwear, honey.

OK.

-OK.

PAUL: There.

PATTI: Wait a minute.

You know when you start, you've
got two minutes of air, OK?

GLEN: Yeah.

-How's it feel?

All right?

-Fine.

DAVE: Tight enough?

GLEN: Yup.

OK.

PAUL: You have access to the
gauge in case you need it?

GLEN: Yeah.

PAUL: Let's stuff that in there.

Disconnect that thing.

[INAUDIBLE]

-Can we snap it up?

We're in a bit of a hurry.

-Hold the phone, willya?

The last thing we want
is another disaster.

-All right.

I'll take your cue.

Then I'll start the
cameras rolling.

-Pete?

What do you got to say?

-All right, now, Glen.

I want you people to be
aware that this structure is

bone dry.

You also have to take
into consideration

that it's full of holes and
there's a wind factor up here.

So we fire, and it's going.

Paul, you go out the trap.

-Right, I'm gonna [INAUDIBLE].

DAVE: How do you feel?

GLEN: [INAUDIBLE].

-Hey, uh-- how
dangerous is this?

I mean, has anyone
ever died from it?

-What?

-This stunt-- is it dangerous?

-No.

No, it's easy.

It's a piece of cake.

-OK.

You know the signal
for extinguish

as soon as I hit the dirt.

-Right.

Gotcha.

-We'll be there.

-OK.

We got, uh, 15 seconds
before the [INAUDIBLE]

before this shack's gonna blow.

You feel good?

-Yup.

-All right.

-OK.
I'm going on air.

Ask him if he's ready.

PATTI: Right.

You've got two minutes of air.

MAN: Quiet, please.

PAUL: You guys ready
down there, or what?

Hey, come on, you guys.

Clear it out of here, eh?

MAN: High-speed camera ready.

MAN: You ready?

PAUL: Sit him down, willya?

This is it.

Can you see?

All clear!

Get out of here.

Beat it.

All right, you ready?

Camera one, two, three,
four, five, six--

-Light the fire!

PAUL: --seven--

MAN: [INAUDIBLE].

PAUL: --nine--

EARL: Roll camera!

PAUL: --eleven, twelve,
thirteen, fourteen, fifteen.

MAN: OK. [INAUDIBLE]
she's fired!

MAN: Rolling two.

Action!

PAUL: I'm headed
out the [INAUDIBLE].

Hey.

What's going on out there?

Hey, come on.

Let me out!

[INAUDIBLE]

Hey, I'm burning!

Help me!

I'm burning!

-Cut!

-[INAUDIBLE].

MAN: Cool it down.

-All right, all right.

Easy, easy, easy.

-Beautiful.

-You OK?

-[INAUDIBLE].

-Terrific.

-Where's Paulie?

-What do you mean,
where's Paulie?

I didn't see him come out.

-Where's Paulie?

-Jesus christ, did
Paulie get out?

-Hi.

Is there anything I can do?

-I don't think so, baby.

-Well, would you like a drink.

-I was just going
to get out of here.

-Do you want some company?

-I just gotta think
this thing through.

-OK.

Bartender.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

-See ya, doll.

-Glen?

[MOTORCYCLE REVVING]

-What the hell do
you mean, he'll

get back to me as
soon as he can?

We're doing a movie, here!

A movie!

A movie!

What do you mean, you
don't like being yelled at?

Then don't be a secretary!

-That was stupid.

-I don't need you to
tell me what's stupid.

-Wrong.

You do need me.

And don't you forget it.

-I don't need
advice from a whore.

What are you doing?

-I'm calling Daddy.

And I'll get through
to [INAUDIBLE].

-Sure.

Get through to Daddy.

And he'll find out what his
daughter is really like.

-[INAUDIBLE].

Because you don't know.

-Oh, but Greg does?

Greg knows, doesn't he?

Who else knows?

Who else?

Come on.
Come on.

Tell me.
Tell me.

Tell me. [INAUDIBLE] assistant.

The second assistant.

The third assistant.
[INAUDIBLE].

Come on, tell me.

Tell me, tell me, tell me.

Come on.

Who haven't you slept with?

Tell me.

-You.

-[INAUDIBLE] you.

You low-life rich bitch.

[SCREAM]

-Davy.

You been working with the car?

-Yeah, the mechanic and I
quickened up the steering.

-You think you can get that
up on two wheels on purpose?

-I went over 100
yards this morning.

-100 yards, eh?

You ever hear Paulie
say, "going for it?"

-Every time he did a stunt.

GLEN: Know what he meant?

-No fear.

Total concentration.

He said it was somewhere
between an art and a science.

-Tell you what to do in
case you smell trouble?

-Protect the guys whose
life depends on you.

-You got all the
answers, don't you?

-I'm going for it.

-All right.

This thing takes more
brains than balls.

You know that.

One last thing.

Never ruin the man's shot.

-I heard that.

-[INAUDIBLE].

-Hey, Glen.

You gonna wear the harness?

-I haven't figured that out yet.

[CRYING]

JUDY: I'm not a whore.

-Hey, Judy, are you OK?

What is it?

Hey, what happened?

Are you OK?

Oh my god.

Who did that?

Who was it?

-Blake.

-Why'd he do it?

-He's crazy.

-Is he crazy because you were
having an affair with Greg?

Is that why he killed Greg?

Is it?

Is it?

-Yes.

-And what about Paul and Chuck?

Did he do that too?

Did he?

-I don't know.

Glen came to the set
and acted suspicious.

Blake just kind of freaked out.

He just kind of freaked out!

-Yeah.

I guess he just freaked out.

JUDY: Oh my god.

Glen!

HELICOPTER PILOT: [INAUDIBLE].

Ready two.

Looking real good.

PATTI: Take it
slow, will you. huh?

-Hey, Glen.

[CHATTER]

WOMAN: Good luck!

EARL: Come on.

Let's get that car for him.

MAN: Here, let me
get that [INAUDIBLE].

MAN: Ready at the ramp.

MAN: Roger.

Glen's on his way.

MAN: [INAUDIBLE]
off the [INAUDIBLE].

MAN: Move that ambulance up.

PATTI: All right.

Here he comes.

Let's go.

MAN: He's at position one now.

GLEN: Check the ramp?

-It's safe.

MAN: Where's the crash truck?

-It's OK.

MAN: Crash truck's ready.

EARL: Camera two is reloading.

Are you set at one?

MAN: This is one.

He's just getting to the car.

EARL: Let me know
when he's ready.

MAN: Will do.

EARL: Get the
camera car lined up.

-All right, Davy.

You ready?

-Yes, sir.

-All right.

Nice and relaxed.

A lot of concentration.

You'll be all right.

MAN: Go for it, Glen!

GLEN: You bet, Billy.

-We're all standing by here.

Camera ready?

MAN: Camera's ready.

EARL: All right.

Roll camera.

Speed.

Action!

Let her rip!

MAN: Let's go, let's go!

Move that chopper.

HELICOPTER PILOT: Car
is lined up at 45.

[INAUDIBLE]

I got him.

Climbing to 1500.

EARL: Stay with him.

HELICOPTER PILOT:
Starting to hookup now.

-You've got to stop
the stunt. stunt.

-What are you talking about?
-Stop that stunt!

EARL: You crazy, or something?

BJ: Blake rigged all
their damn stunts.

And now Glen's
going to get killed.

Are you going to stop it?

EARL: Keep that camera rolling,
no matter what happens.

-Hello?

Tell Glen that BJ
says it's Blake.

BJ says it's Blake!

It's Blake!

BJ says it's Blake!

You son of a bitch.

-Give me that thing.

-Aren't you going
to do anything?

He killed Greg and now
he's going to kill Glen!

He's going to kill him!

Do something!

Goddamn it!

-Follow the car! [INAUDIBLE].

Bring her down there.

Give me a shot at him.

BJ: A very impressive ending.

GLEN: Just like in the movies.

[MUSIC PLAYING]