Sticky Fingers (1988) - full transcript

Two girls try hard to find job as musicians. One of them play the cello and the other the violin. They have very little money, even to pay the rent. One day a friend (who is a drug dealer) ask them to keep a bag for some days. When the girls discover that inside the bag there are $ 900,000 they decide to take a loan, and then another and another ...

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[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

-HATTIE: Oh.
-LOLLY: [CHUCKLES]

HATTIE: Ugh.

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

[VIOLIN AND CELLO PLAYING]

[APPLAUSE]

CROWD: Take it like that.

Take it like that.

Take it like that.

Take it like that.

So who's this one?



A shoe designer from Paris.

EVANSTON: So how much money
did you lose today?

LOLLY: $37.

They took it
right out of our hand.

EVANSTON:
Out of your hand?

Didn't I tell you not to keep
money in your hand?

I don't wear a bra.
I don't need a bra.

I wear a bra to have
a safe place to keep my money.

Not hungry today?

I can't eat donuts.

Tofu donuts.

Evanston, darling, don't forgetthe Gray Panther benefit

tomorrow night, 7:00.

EVANSTON: I never do.



Hattie,
can't you call Michael

and get us some jingles work?

Selling dishwashing detergent

is not my idea
of playing music.

We could ask him.

Lolly, I don't do jingles.

You don't do floors
and windows either.

Who's Michael?

Uh, my husband.

We're separated.

LOLLY: When did you visit
a psychic?

HATTIE: Jean-Marc took me.

She did this visualization
on my aura

and she saw money around me.
Lots of it.

She said it was clear my life
was gonna change any moment.

What else could that
mean but work?

I mean, every time
I'm down to my last $200,

I always get a job.

What job?

HATTIE: Detail.

Stella, when are we gonna
have hot water?

He went to get a pot.

Well, buzz me
when I could wash.

[VEHICLE RUMBLING]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Did you get my note?

-Hi, Stella.
-What note?

How's your leg?

Don't try to change
the subject.

Did you get my note?

Yes, I did get
your note and, um,

I wrote you a note back.
Did you get my note?

Don't you ask me
what I asked you.

I hate that.

Now, you are two months
behind in your rent.

Your check bounced.

Stella, guess
who I met last week?

Steven Eidy's
brother-in-law's niece

and she said that she can get
you that autographed picture

-that you want.
-STELLA: Oh, are you kidding?

-No.
-Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

No more promises. No.

HATTIE: Uh, Stella,
we're trying to go

in a new direction
with our music.

We're making it much more
accessible.

Yeah, all we need
is one hit song.

STELLA: I want my rent.
That's it.

Now, you two have been taking
advantage of me ever since

I've been in the hospital
and I hate that.

Now, one more week
and you're out.

-Stella.
-One week?

You got to give us
more time than that.

Stella, the restaurant
where I worked blew up.

I'm having a residual check
come in any day now.

Oh, don't give me
no more song cues.

WOMAN: Stella, can you see
the brackets?

-Is it lined up?
-Move it to the right.

More.

Move it.
To the right. More.

-I'm moving it to my right,
-STELLA: Some more, more.

Stella. This is my right.

STELLA: That's fine.
Let it go.

How does it look? [GASPS]

[POTS BREAKING]

It's perfect.
This is perfect.

Woo. I have got to get out
of this city.

You know, people
are trying to rip me off.

I mean, people
ripped off my ring.

Somebody came in my house

and ripped off my mother's ringsof 10 generations.

-That's terrible.
-Uh-hmm.

You're telling me.

You can't trust nobody.

You know, me and Joey,
we broke up.

-No.
-Yeah.

He got this temper.

Well, my psychic,
she's clairvoyant.

She told me he was psychotic.
[CHUCKLES]

Well, tell me something new.

What's wrong with him
is he was a tree

in another life
and his consciousness

is closed.

-He was a what?
-DIANE: A tree.

He needs to get in touch
with his spiritual guides.

Not to say
that any of my friends

are really in touch
with their spiritual guides.

But, you know,
I can visualize things

and I visualized that he was
gonna try to kill me.

And I thought about getting hima crystal or something,

but I thought, "No,
that's not what I need."

You see, what I need
is peace and serenity

because there is just too
much confusion in this world.

No, that is just too many
missiles and it's too easy

for somebody to push
the button,

and then the whole thing
fucking.

You mean whole fucking thing?

DIANE: That's what I said.

Here you go.

You can count it if you want.

Girl, you know I trust you.

Thanks for bringing it by.

-DIANE: Uh-hmm.
-HATTIE: Hmm, smells great.

DIANE: Yeah, and it was hard
to come by, too.

Hattie, we have a concert
to do in the park.

-You better get dressed.
-HATTIE: Oh, yeah. Right.

Listen, Di, have a safe trip.

DIANE: Uh-hmm.

Oh, shit.

HATTIE: [GIGGLES]

[PHONE RINGS]

DIANE: I'll get it.
I'll get it.

[PHONE RINGS]

DIANE: Hello?

Yeah, that's me.

What?

Hit the mattress? When?

Are you sure?

All of his fingers?

Uh-huh. Yeah.

His fingernails, too?

Uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

[INDISTINCT] Uh-huh.

Listen, put together
a few of my things.

Oh, and don't forget my creams.

Don't worry about a thing.
I'll be there

in less than an hour.

I'll take care of everything.
It's okay, sugar.

Okay. Bye.

[SIGHS]

Oh. Sorry, I had to give out
your number.

Lo, uh, could you keep
this bag for me?

The damn thing
is just so heavy.

I don't wanna throw
out my bag,

dragging it around all day.

Well, what's in it?

DIANE: Nothing.
Just a few things

I didn't wanna leave at home.

You don't mind,
do you?

-Well, I--
-I mean, if you mind,

I'll just ask Hattie.
It's no big deal.

I mean, we go way back,
she and I.

-Well, sure. Yeah.
-DIANE: Oh, great.

I'll just put it out of your wayand then I'll be on mine.

[LAUGHS] You cannot imagine

how much this is gonna just
help me out.

Oh. [LAUGHS] Oh, now,

I won't have to even go
and see my chiropractor.

And Lo,

make sure nothing
happens to it.

-See you in a few days, Lo.
-Loll.

-DIANE: Huh?
-It's Loll.

DIANE: It's Loll.

[SCOFFS] Forget it.

[SCOFFS] You know,

life is just too short. Tsk.

A friend of mine just got hit.

LOLLY: Hit?

By a car?

By a gun.

[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]

HATTIE: Did she leave?

Yeah.

God, that woman can talk.

Hattie, how can you
buy grass

when we have to pay
the rent?

It wasn't mine except
for the change.

I'm buying it for Martin,
Kim, Lisa, Steve,

Wayne, Crazy Carol,
Karen, and Carol.

That way, I can keep
a few buds for myself

and it doesn't cost me
anything.

What's her bag doing
in the closet?

Oh, she asked if she could
leave it here for a few days.

-Well, what's in it?
-I don't know.

Well, how could you
let her leave it here

without knowing
what was in it?

I asked.

HATTIE: Hey, Loll,

what do you think of this?

Uh, it's too tight.

HATTIE: Thank you for sharing.

God, I hate being poor.

I hate it.

-What?
-HATTIE: Loll,

do you have
my shoulder pads?

Uh, yeah.

Hattie, I didn't mean it.

HATTIE: It's okay, Loll.

No, really. Um,

I never would've. I mean,

I swear I didn't know.

HATTIE: Loll, it's okay.
Honest.

Just ask me next time.

I know you're gonna be mad
at me. I know you.

HATTIE: Will you stop?
I'm not mad.

Hit by a gun. Hit by a gun.

I gained weight well, huh?

Tell me the truth.

Do I look fat to you?

Hattie, it's awful.

Yeah, I know. I've been
anxious lately, but, I mean,

it's kind of rubenesque,
isn't it?

It's not so bad.

It's bad. [SOBS]

Well, just stop beating.

Well, you don't have to be
so ÷|agreeable about it.

No, not--[SOBS]
see what the--no,

it's--no, she--

HATTIE: What is the matter
with you?

Well--[SOBS] uh, what--

Hattie, Hattie. Hattie,

look.

What's this?

It's Diane's.

Holy shit. Is this real?

I think so.

Oh, no. No.
I don't believe this.

How could you let her
leave anything here?

What's the matter with you?

-Well, she's your friend. I--
-She's not my friend.

She's my dope dealer.

I thought she was a lawyer.

No, she used to be.She wasn't making enough money.

[SOBS] What do we got to do?

How could you let her
leave anything here?

We don't have any doorman,
there's no security.

We're gonna have to get it
back to her.

[DOORBELL BUZZING]

HATTIE: Where is she?

Come on, Diane.

What kind of name
is Jankowitz?

Polish.

Polish people aren't black.

Maybe she married
a Polish man

-and that's her married name.
-She's not married.

Well, maybe she just hated
the name she was born

with and decided
to change her name.

Lolly, focus, focus.

We got to get inside.

Or maybe she's just,
you know, being different

and thought it was really
cool to have it here

-just to kind of...
-Well, maybe if you just try

-and let me handle this, okay?
-Can you hold this?

I'm going in.
I'll be right back.

Oh. Oh my Goddess.

Oh my Goddess. Oh, oh.

Oh my Goddess.

Oh, please. Oh, please.
Oh, please.

Oh, please. Oh, please.

[SCREAMS]

-Miss.
-It's not my fault, officer.

Take it. Keep it.
I don't want it.

-It's not even mine.
-Well, thanks.

But I don't think
it'll match my outfit.

Debbie. Debbie.

Debbie, Debbie, why aren't you
answering me?

What seems to be
the problem, officer?

It seems your friend
here is...

HATTIE: Oh, Debbie
and I aren't friends.

Our kids play together.

And where have you been,
Lisa?

Taking care of the kids,
Debbie.

Oh.

POLICEMAN: What you got
in there, Debbie?

Machine gun?

HATTIE: No, just a case
full of money.

[THUNDER RUMBLES]

HATTIE: What are you doing?

LOLLY: I'm making sure each
pack is $2,000 in it.

Okay. Look. I put $450,000
here and with this,

that's $450,000 here.

$900,000

cash.

$900,000.

It's a little under a million.

HATTIE: Yeah.

LOLLY: Where the hell
did you get all this?

Selling pot. It's the second
largest cash crop

in the country.

LOLLY: And so we can't
take it to the police.

What are we gonna do?

-[THUNDER RUMBLES]
-[DOORBELL BUZZES]

-Who is it?-DIANE: Who do you think it is?

-Hide.
-DIANE: We have a rehearsal,

remember?

HATTIE: Well, yeah.
We forgot.

Be right there.

Okay, Loll. I put it
under the couch.

DIANE: What are you doing
in there?

Just a little redecorating.

Hi.

We thought you were Stella.

-Stella?
-Yeah, you know,
from downstairs.

-The super--
-Yeah, I know Stella.

She gave me a message for you.

It's an eviction notice.

She thought it might bea little easier coming from me.

Hey. Don't worry
about this whole money thing.

HATTIE: Money thing?
What money thing?

I'm not worried about money.
You, Loll?

Money? Me? No. I mean,I'm worried but not about money.

Well, my friend Geraldine
has a brother who works

at Brooklyn Academy
in the box office

and he heard about this
audition for live musicians.

For who? Tanya Blue.

And he has a friend that's
a friend of the producers

and he said he might be able
to get us an audition.

Thanks for the dress.
It was a big hit.

It's a little wrinkled.

I'll hang it in the closet.

[SIREN WAILING]

SAM: I don't have
the apartment anymore.

LOLLY: What do you mean?

SAM: The guy that's living hereis coming back.

LOLLY: You just moved in.

SAM: I even had a copy
of the key made for you today.

I was gonna give it to you
but what's the point?

LOLLY: Well, that's okay.
I'll take the key.

I don't know where
I'm gonna move to or anything.

Everything seems to be
happening at the same time.

Well, let me have the key.

Oh, honey, I got to be out
of here in two weeks.

What's the point?

I want the key, Sam.
Give me the key.

SAM: Wow. You wanna just
drop it?

I mean, do you want some
chocolate or something?

I want the key.

-Why?
-Well, what if something

should happen to me?

-Are you okay?
-LOLLY: Give me the key, Sam.

I've never not had your key.
You have to give it to me.

Look. Here are all
your other ones.

Those are my keys.

LOLLY: Yeah, to every cell
that you've ever had.

You kept my keys?

LOLLY: They're all here.
Count them, eight.

It means that much to you?

It means that much to me.

Now you have a complete
collection.

I love this collection.

I love you.

[KNOCKING]

-What?
-Did you hear something?

No.

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

It's knocking.
Do you hear knocking?

Who would be knocking
at 1:30 in the morning?

Just a minute, all right?

Marcie.

Loll, it's Marcie.

-Marcie, what are you doing?
-I know it's late

but I'm very upset.
I'm in a lot of pain.

Do you care?

Yeah, I care.
Just a second. Okay?

-Are you sure?
-Yeah, I'm pretty sure.

Just a second.

Loll, it's Marcie.

She said she wants
to talk to me.

What do you think?
I mean, you know,

I mean I know it's late.

I'm very upset.

Well, yeah.

Sure.

Excuse me.

I'll just be back
in a minute.

LOLLY: Marcie came over
last night.

HATTIE: Again?

LOLLY: Yeah, she's obsessed.

She dumped him but she thinks

she can have him back
just like that.

HATTIE: What is with her?
You've been together

for two years.

HATTIE: You know I saw her
huddled up hiding

on the exit stairs across
the hall from his apartment?

And the other night,
she was sleeping on the roof.

LOLLY: I can't take it anymore.

HATTIE: What did Sam say?

LOLLY: Nothing.

HATTIE: Have you said
anything to him?

Well,

-I mean I should.
-Uh-hmm.

I know I should, okay?

I'm not an idiot.

No, I haven't said anything.

It's like the words
get stuck in my throat.

My voice changes.
It gets higher.

Your problem
is you're too nice.

You got to learn to say no.

If you said no to Diane,
we wouldn't be

in this mess
in the first place.

I know.

Loll, you got to stand up
for yourself.

Hold your head straight.

-I know.
-My dad, he was showing me

this picture of the whole
family.

I mean, everyone.
Brothers, cousins, aunts,

uncles, everybody.
And all the men standing

in the picture are holding
their heads straight.

Real confident. Real direct.

And all the women
were standing

holding our heads tilted

to the side like this.

Like, we don't know how
to hold our heads straight.

You're right.
I'm gonna talk to him.

[CLINKING]

Someone's here.

In the bathroom.

[HAMMERING]

[SCREAMS]

[SCREAMS]

You wanna scream, too?

No, thank you.

HATTIE: What are you doing?

Well, what does it look
like we're doing?

You left your faucets on
when the water was shut off.

Yeah, and it leaked right
through the ceiling in 4A.

-Didn't it, honey?
-Yes, it did.

Oh, I'm sorry.

-We didn't know.
-I mean, you couldn't have

known because the water
was off. Am I not right?

-Uh-hmm.
-Oh, I love that crystal.

Don't. Please don't

touch my crystal.

You know, I've been thinking
about maybe doing

some remodeling here,
you know, some linoleum

maybe and some vinyl in.

Yeah, you know, you could
take the moldings off,

help update the lines.

Make it more modern.
That would be nice.

It would give it a more
Mediterranean feel

of the place.

NANCY: Hello. Hello. Hello.

-Hello.
-And now what about stucco?

It's so Santa Fe.
I mean the space

really lends itself
to that desert feel,

don't you think?

Well, now, wait a minute,

don't I have
the right apartment?

Isn't this 5A,

the two-bedroom with
the skylight in the bathroom?

Yes. Oh my God.

It's fantastic.

Oh, skylights
really work wonders,

don't you think?

Oh, wait. Who are you?

Well, I'm Nancy. I talked
to you on the phone

this morning.
You're Stella, right?

-Not quite.
-STELLA: I'm Stella.

Oh. Well, my husband said
if I love it, take it.

Well, I love it.
So I'm gonna take it.

Will you excuse us?

LOLLY: Be right back.

NANCY: This place
has so much potential.

LOLLY: Hattie,
what are you doing?

You can't do that.

She took an ad out in the paper,

she's renting it out
from under us.

We can't touch it, Hattie.
It's not ours.

We have to figure out
something else.

-Can't you ask your parents?
-They don't have anything

and you don't have any parents
to ask. We have no choice.

-But it's stealing.
-It is not.

We are not thieves.
We are simply borrowing it.

Diane would want us
to take some of it

so that we have an apartment
to keep the bag.

We will pay back
every single cent.

I promise. Move.

Stella, say hello
to March and April.

You know how it is.
You have to tempt fate

every once in a while,
throw caution to the wind,

rob from Peter to pay Paul
and hope that Diane

will understand.

[WHISTLES]

HATTIE: "Who Makes The Coffee?"First novel by Sam Goodman.

Lolly, whose idea
was this cake?

-LOLLY: Sam's.
-WOMAN: I hope no one

from Ms. Magazineis here.

SAM: I'm substituting
pastry for red meat.

I'm gonna try that, Diane.

Sam, who makes the coffee?

She does.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

Hattie, I can't stop thinking
about the thing.

-What thing?
-The thing, the new thing.

Do you think we should've left
the thing at home alone?

Hey, love, relax.
It's fine, okay?

Just don't worry about it.
Enjoy the party.

Yeah, but do you think
we did the right thing

-by taking part of it?
-Well, I told you

we're gonna pay backevery single cent with interest.

Now relax.
Go dance with Sam.

Let's have a good time, okay?

Look, try
and have a good time.

-Okay.
-Oh, this cake sucks.

I'm Jake. Who are you?

Sally.

Oh, where are you from?

Beverly Hills.

Oh, nice to meet you, Bev.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

MAN: Don't forget, poker
game. Same time, my place,

-tomorrow night.
-Okay.

-You bet.
-Hey, Ev, you want a hit?

No thanks. I don't need
the input.

[LAUGHING]

What's she doing here?

SAM: I guess she knows
somebody or something.

I don't know.

You. She knows you.

I didn't know
how to tell you.

She called a couple
of nights ago.

I mean, it's like
a coincidence and it seems

that she got a job
in the PR office

that's handling the book.

I mean, it just happened
a couple of days ago.

It's a coincidence that Marcie'syour press agent?

She's not my press agent yet.

She's not my press agent now.

She just got a job

at the office there.

That cake is violence
against women.

Have a piece of misogyny.

Leslie, have you made
your 90 meetings in 90 days?

-This is my 89th day.
-Oh.

I've got to make
32 meetings by tomorrow.

Evanston,

wanna dance?

No. I'm not ready yet,
Leslie.

Yeah, too bad.

See?

Your two exes are here.

So you're in everything, huh?

Well, but I don't do
drugs. Hey.

And you don't have a chance.

-Hello, Hatts.
-Michael!

I called you last week,
didn't you get my message?

Yeah, I did, I just--I've
been so busy, I'm working,

-I haven't had time to see you.-You look beautiful as usual.

Thank you. So do you.

I guess work's all you ever
needed to make you happy.

Yeah, I guess.

So, what are you doing here?

Oh, Moura's a friend
of Jerry's.

The artist?

Yeah, they went
to college together.

Oh, I didn't know she made
it through high school.

Listen, maybe we could get
together sometime.

I mean, it's been 16 months.

I mean, who's counting?

I know a great new cappuccino
place down south...

How you doin', Hatts?

Don't call me Hatts.

Well, did Michael tell you?

-No.
-Oh, I'm pregnant!

Ain't that wonderful?

Now you call can get
that divorce

you've been talking about.

Well, congratulations.

That was fast.

Terrible party.

I feel sick.

The answering machine,
did you move it?

Move what?

The answering machine?

Why would I move
the answering machine?

Where's the television?

I don't know.

You sure you didn't move
the answering machine?

Why would I move
the answering machine?

I don't know.

Come on, what did you do
to the answering machine?

Will you stop asking me

about the answering machine?

[THUDS]

Somebody's here!

Go, look in your bedroom.

-No, you go look in yours...
-No you...

Well, I'm not going
if you're not going.

Yeah.
We'll both go!

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

[FOOTSTEPS]

[SCREAMS]

What are you doing?

[SIRENS BLARING]

The stereo is gone!

The window's open.

The stick's on the floor.

[DOG BARKING]

We've been robbed.

We've been robbed?

Oh, God, please,
no! Goodness.

Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness.

Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness.

They took the thing.
Oh, Diane, oh, God,

tell me this isn't happening.

Hattie? Hattie? It's here.

-It's here. It's okay!
-HATTIE: I can't find it.

Did you find--okay. Okay.
It's okay! It's okay!

-I don't know where it is!
-Look, I just forgot

-to put it back.
-I don't know where it is.

-I don't see it anywhere.
-Hattie! Look! Look, Hattie!

-Here!
-Where was it?

I couldn't sleep!

Oh, it's safe
and it's in my arms,

and that's all I care about.

My cello, where is it?

It's next to my violin.

What violin?

What are you talking about?

They've stolen it,
it was priceless,

it belonged to my grandmother!

Where is it?
Where did it go?

Maybe it's somewhere else?

Somewhere else? Why would it
be somewhere else?

It's never somewhere else.
It's always there.

HATTIE: It's got to be here.

LOLLY: Yeah? Where?

HATTIE: My violin
is worth over $80,000,

it's all I have!

-We've been robbed!
-We've been robbed!

They stole our instruments!

Why would they steal
our instruments?

Because they're expensive.

Wait a minute.
There's no problem.

We're insured.
There's no problem.

There is no problem.

There's a problem?

You did make the last payment,
didn't you?

[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]

With the new cases embossed,

that comes to $91,475.

Now, how will you pay for it?

HATTIE: Uh, cash.

We're doing
the right thing, right?

Diane would want us
to have our instruments.

Without them, we have no chanceof ever paying her back.

[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]

Hey, guys. Come on!

-We got the gig.
-Yes.

-Three weeks.
-Yeah.

Performers of the week
at Brooklyn Academy.

-Ooh.
-With Tanya Blue.

-Woo!
-And we get paid.

-Oh.
-Oh!

-Girls will be bad.
-Oh.

-Be bad.
-Be bad.

-Be bad.
-Be bad.

We only replaced
what was stolen.

I got all the receipts
right here.

And we just will write
some IUDs, IOUs.

Right.

MAN ON TV: For the both
of you out there,

I hope he comes up
so we can give away

some of the boss' money.

SAM: You were robbed
three days ago?

What kind of insurance
company is this?

That's a pretty good company.

Pretty good?

It's a great company.

LOLLY: I hooked it
all up myself.

Publishing company
wants me to go to Chicago.

Some kind of dinner
they're having or something.

I really don't wanna go.

But if I don't go,
they won't want the book.

I don't know.

Let me think.
Should I go or not?

And see,
this remote works the TV.

Go to what?

-The dinner.
-What dinner?

Never mind.

That sounds like I'm not going.

Well, when is it?

Next weekend.

See this works the CD player?

-You really wanna go?
-Yeah.

And the stereo.

The hardest part was
understanding all the manuals.

You really wanna go?

Yeah, it'd be fun.

Will they put us up in a hotel?

It would be fun.

Wouldn't it?

I don't wanna go.

Who hooked all this up for you?

I did.

[FOOTSTEPS]

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

[SCREAMS]

Help!

-Is your name Elcot?
-Yes--no!

-I mean, yes!
-MAN: It's Elcot.

Mrs. Hattie Elcot.

Oh, please don't shoot, please,

I will give you
whatever you want!

I have a summons
from a Mr. Michael Elcot

for your divorce.

Hi.

Where's your sister tonight?

She's not feeling very well.

I thought you might be hungry.

I'm always hungry.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

[CHUCKLES]

[WATER GUSHING]

-LOLLY: Hattie, is that you?
-HATTIE: Yeah.

LOLLY: I thought you were
gone for the night.

HATTIE: Jean-Marc's
too cheerful.

I wanna be depressed.

LOLLY: I can't believe
Moura's pregnant.

She's actually
gonna put stretch marks

on that silicon body of hers?

Michael doesn't look happy.

HATTIE: Oh, that's terrible.

But I hate his short hair.

[TOILET FLUSHING]

Where's the buzzer?

Behind the Kleenex.

And we had an arrangement,
everything was fine.

This is empty.

What, there's no more Kleenex?

I want my copper kettle back.

That was a wedding present
from my great aunt Susan.

You hate your great aunt Susan.

And those pewter mugs
I gave him

for my first
wedding anniversary.

And The Beatles' White Album.

And some goddamn toothpaste!

LOLLY: Use the baking soda.

We spent $98,000 and we don't
have any freaking toothpaste!

LOLLY: We had to have
instruments.

Look, Diane would do
the same thing if she was us!

All we need is one hit song!

Anyway, we got a job.

HATTIE: Yeah, three weeks.

You wanna hear something
even more depressing?

They don't want
musicians anymore,

they want technicians.

Forty violins
at the push of a button.

Our instruments are obsolete.

-We're obsolete.
-[SOBS]

Hand me the razor.
I'm gonna kill myself.

We ran out of blades.

HATTIE: Are you sure
we're doing the right thing?

LOLLY: We're depressed.

Very depressed.

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

Hey, Loll,
what do you think of this?

-I like it.
-Oh, good, I like it, too.

-I'm gonna get it.
-Well, I'm gonna get it, too.

Fine.

We can't--we can't both
get the same coat.

Well, I saw it first.

You did not.

I did too when we walked in.

Well, so did I.

Well, I tried it on first.

Well, I got
to dressing room first.

Yeah, that's because
I saw it first.

No.
I saw it first.

Fine.

You buy the coat.

No.
You want it?

-You buy it.
-No. I don't want it.

Well, I don't want it either.

Then I'll take it.

Well, I'm gonna take it, too.

Fine.

We'll both look stupid
with the same coat.

No, we won't.

I won't wear it
when you wear it.

Then you'll never wear it?

-I will, too.
-No, you won't.

-LOLLY: Yes, I will.
-We are always together.

-We are not.
-We are.

Forget it.
You can have the coat.

I don't want it.

Look, you're the one
that wants to be the only one

with the coat,
so you get the coat.

-I don't want it anymore.
-I don't want it either.

-Fine.
-Fine.

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

STELLA: How am I doing,
darling, huh?

[DOG BARKS]

[PANTING]

Oh.

My, my, according to this,
you're dead.

Oh, don't you wish.

[DOG BARKS]

Oh, my God.

I hope he's not pimping
for them.

What are you looking at?

-Get, get, get.
-WOMAN: I just wanna see.

I don't want them to see you.

-Shh.
-WOMAN: What's going on?

-STELLA: Get behind the...
-I wanna know what's going on.

What are you doing, Stella?

Look onto the northwest
corner of that building, huh?

Let's see.
The hot sun is over there

so that means that way
is the west.

-To the left. To the left.
-Yeah.

-Look to the left,
the guy in the phone booth.

-Yeah. What about him?-I've seen that guy here before.

-So?-So I better keep my eye on him.

We've already had
one robbery this week.

Oh, I think
he's kind of attractive

in a kind of mysterious
eastern way, don't you?

No.
He's not my type.

I rarely see my type
in this neighborhood.

-Look at him.
-Oh, God.

I like stars, you know,

like Jack Nicholson is my type.

Yes.

And he could put
his little shoes under my bed.

Him or Wallace Beery.

Stella.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

HATTIE: Loll, who's that raven
Sam's got his arm around?

Hi, Sam.

Lolly, Hattie.

You remember Marcie.

-Yeah, sure.
-MARCIE: Hi.

-Hello.
-Hi.

I thought that the lady
that ran Penny Coop

-was his girlfriend.
-I thought Ms. Greenfield

-was his girlfriend.
-What is this guy, a Mormon?

[CHUCKLES]

You're probably wondering what
I'm doing with Marcie, right?

Well, I'm not doing anything.

Look, I mean, we just--
we met and, you know,

had lunch and she's been upset,you know.

She's always upset.

Yeah.

See, what she thinks
that she can I

can't be friends anymore,
which is crazy, you know?

But that's what she thinks,
you know?

And I mean, I'm--
I told her I'm with you.

I mean, I'm with you

and that she--and we can
still be friends, you know?

And that's what
I was saying to her, you know,

when I put my arm
around her, you know,

and it was like to emphasize
a point, you know?

It was like a hug out
of friendship

and everything to show--
you know.

But I mean, Lolly,
I'm with you.

I mean, I'm--

we're still on the Chicago
this weekend, right?

I have to rehearse.

-SAM: Rehearse?
-You didn't tell me that.

LOLLY: I told you.

I forgot.

I mean, uh, did that mean
that you--

well, I mean
do you mind if I go?

It's business.

SAM: It is business.
It is business.

Uh, don't be upset.

Um, Marcie is going, too.

But I did--I just found
about it, you know,

the PR firm
is handling the dinner.

And I mean I hope
it's all right with you.

Is it--is it all right
with you?

I mean, is it gonna--

is it gonna be all right
with you?

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

WOMAN: Oh, thank you very much.

-All right.-HATTIE: Hurry up, we're late.

♪ Out of control

♪ Out of control

♪ Out of control

♪ Out of control

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

-[BEEPS]
-DIANE: Hi.

It's Di. You there?

Pick up.

Listen, I've been trying
to reach you all week

but the lines were down and,
woo, these earthquakes.

I can't wait to be on the next plane out of here.

There are mobs
at every payphone.

Could you wait a minute?

I'll be right off.

When is your home training?

Personally, things are not
going as well as they should.

I've got me a bad case
out of amoeba [INDISTINCT].

I can't go
into all of that right now.

Will you stop pushing?

Back off, lady.

Look, I'll call you next week

when I can be
more specific, okay?

Ciao.

♪ Out of control

♪ Out of control

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

♪ Out of control

♪ Out of control

♪ Out of control

♪ Out of control

[DOOR CLOSES]

LOLLY: Okay, driver.
Russian Tea Room, please.

Evanston, some caviar?

-HATTIE: A little pate?
-More champagne?

EVANSTON: A hundred and
ninety-four thousand dollars.

One hundred and ninety-four
thousand dollars.

You could be killed.

This could be mafia money.

Big men in big suits

with big guns could come here

and drag you off by the hair.

You should be scared.

They could put a bomb
in your car.

We don't have a car.

We could get one
for the new equipment.

-Maybe a van.
-EVANSTON: That's stealing.

You're stealing.
That's what it's called,

stealing.

You're right.

I've tried to stop.
I really have.

Every day, I try not to do it.

Every day I tell myself,
"Today,

I am not gonna go shopping."

And I'm out there,
and I'm surrounded by things,

and I can't help myself.

HATTIE: I had to buy a dress.

But a dress, one dress
with a nice cut, good fabric,

flattering line costs $3,000.

And with accessories, that's
another $4,500 right there.

Can I have some more champagne?

HATTIE: We need help, Evan.

LOLLY: We don't know
what else to do.

You spent a hundred and
ninety-four thousand dollars.

Do you like your outfit?

It's fabulous.

HATTIE: I knew it would fit.

This is it?

This is all I get?

You spend a hundred and
ninety-four thousand dollars,

and I get a tie-dyed outfit?

Did you get it on sale?

Oh, Ev, no.

Look what we've got you.
We got you this VCR too.

Yeah. And this
beautiful red coat.

And, look, an answering machine,and a tea for two.

-[LAUGHS]
-Wonderful Atlas

-for your apartment.
-[LAUGHS]

Have you heard
anything I've said?

You are becoming
everything you said

you never wanted to become.
You used to be musicians.

You used to practice every
single day, four hours a day.

And now what do you do?

Go out spending money
of stuff, things.

Look, give me that bag.

Give me that bag.

Don't touch me.

Get out.

Get out.

-Why?
-[SIGHS]

I'm gonna take this bag,

and I'm gonna lock it
in the closet,

and I'm gonna put the keys

somewhere where
you can't find it.

[SIGHS]

What are you doing that for?

LOLLY; What about all our stuff?

Don't worry about the stuff.

I'm trying to save your lives.

[GROANS]

We got new locks.

[SIRENS WAILING]

Who died?

Metcalf, 5-B.

Listen, I got someone
for the apartment.

My cousin Shirley needs a place.

Do you mind?

What happened?

Jeffrey Metcalf, 5-B.

He was strangled to death

by his girlfriend.

-The psychiatrist?
-The shrink.

He had a cable TV cord
around his neck.

WOMAN: Death by sex.

WOMAN: Autoerotic asphyxia.

You know, going by coming.

A hundred and ninety-four
thousand dollars

should never go very far.

Don't worry, Loll.

You're only worth
as much as you owe.

Which is the remote for the TV?

No.
That's for the big one.

I mean, this one.

-Hattie.
-What?

How could you do that?

Do what?

How could you eat that?
That's my favorite part.

What is?

The part you just ate,
the chunk of chocolate.

How could you do that?

Don't you know
this is my favorite part?

I wasn't thinking.

-[TELEPHONE RINGS]
-[SIGHS] You always do that.

I'm sorry, Loll.

Don't you have any more?

No.
That was the last one.

Hello?

Dianne.

Dianne.

Oh, gosh.
What a surprise.

How are you?

Oh, yeah.
I'm doing great.

Yeah.
Uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

[LAUGHING]

Quiet.

When are you--
when are you coming back?

This weekend?

No.
I won't be here.

I got a job.

Lolly?
She got a job too.

She won't be here.

Will you--? [INDISTINCT]

yeah, the Brooklyn Academy,

in Brooklyn.

The green bag?

Leave the bag.
You never saw the bag.

Yeah. I've seen it.

-[INDISTINCT WHISPERING]
-In the closet.

-Yeah.
-[INDISTINCT]

Sure.
I'll bring it.

-Saturday.
-What?

Uh, 2:00.

No.
We'll be on stage then.

Oh, no. We can't then.
We will be on stage then.

-1:00?
-Way too early.

-Way too early.
-You know, that's gonna be

too early, Di.
And it's--

-1:30?
-No way. No way.

That should be fine.

[INDISTINCT]

Yes.
1:30 will be great.

Um, in the ladies room
on The Mezzanine?

Yes.
Only one.

Okay.

Me too.

Oh, I can't wait too.

Oh, it's good finally
hearing from you, Diane.

[CHUCKLES] Okay.

Okay.
Bye.

Oh, shit.

Here you are, ladies.

New lock, new key.

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

HATTIE: Hey, Loll,
did you take my shoulder pads?

LOLLY: You sure
this is the right place?

HATTIE: Yeah. We were just herewith Jean-Marc.

We lost a lot of money here.

LOLLY: Then what are we
doing here?

-Taxi.
-HATTIE: Come here.

Tina's working tonight.

-She'll get us in.
-LOLLY: Tina who?

HATTIE: Tina Howell.

-LOLLY: What?
-From the Dead Tarts.

That's what we're gonna be
if we don't get out of here.

Lolly, I've been here
a couple of times.

-Trust me.
-[KNOCKS ON DOOR]

[SCREAMS]

Taxi!

Taxi!

Hey!

♪ Good luck
with your money ♪

♪ Good luck with honey

♪ Good luck with your money

♪ I hope you make it big
tonight ♪

♪ Good luck with your money

♪ You laugh when it's funny

-♪ Good luck
-LOLLY: What if we lose?

We're not gonna lose.
Tina.

TINA: Hattie.

Back already?

This is my roommate, Lolly.

Oh, I've heard so much
about you.

-Hi.
-Would you like a drink?

-Yeah. No
-Sure. I'll take...

We'd actually like to get
started right away.

Can you turn these into chips?

Sure. Come with me.
I'll set you up.

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

♪ Good luck
with your money ♪

♪ Good luck with the honey

♪ Good luck with your money

♪ I hope you make it big
tonight ♪

♪ Good luck with your money

♪ Hold tight to your honey

♪ Good luck with your money

♪ I hope you keep it
all tonight ♪

[SOBS]

Shit.

[GRUNTS]

Where is she, Ike?

Huh?
Where's Diane?

MAN: Answer the man
when he's talking to you.

I don't know, Joey.

I want that bag.

Micetti's waiting for it
in Zurich.

I'm following some chicks
that know her.

JOEY: Better find her, Ike.

[GRUNTS]

I'll see your 4,000.

Full house,

aces high.

I got two pair.
I win.

Hold it right there,
little sister.

This here ain't Candy Land,
you know, little lady?

You got to have the cards firstbefore you pick up the stash.

Full house beats two pair.

You're kidding.

Hit me.

Hit me.

Hit me.

-That's 12.
-DEALER: Five card Charlie.

That pays double.

HATTIE: I can bet
whatever I want, right?

MAN: The minimum bet's
a thousand.

I'll bet another $10,000 then.

Ten thousand, huh?

[CHUCKLES] Lady,
you're too much.

You're bluffing.

I'll call.

Tender me.

I'll fold.

Honey, I am not
gonna let y'all steal

this little kitty out
from under my perma nails.

I'll see your ten
and bump it another five.

Ooh, that's a big little kitty.

I'll see that,

and I'll raise it another 10.

That's 15 to you.

Fifteen, huh?

I'm in.

-MAN: I'll call.
-What the hell?

It's only money.
[CHUCKLES]

MAN: Full house, jacks high.

WOMAN: I got me four little
nines in rain or come shine.

I got four queens.

That's cute.

HATTIE: How much did I win?

DEALER: About 85,000.
It's your baby.

HATTIE: Oh, yeah.

LOLLY: Good.
Doing good.

Doing real good.

HATTIE: Okay.
Focus. Focus.

LOLLY: Stay with me.
Stay with me.

-HATTIE: That's it.
-LOLLY: Oh. Oh.

HATTIE: Yeah. Yeah.

I got to [INDISTINCT]

[CHEERING]

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

HATTIE: We did it.
We did it.

We did it.
We did it.

-I can't freaking believe...
-We did it.

-...we did it.
-But we did it.

It's unbelievable, Lolly.
So unbelievable.

I told you we could do it.

[INDISTINCT]

Sir, can you give us
two coffees, please?

One regular, one light.

This is unbelievable.

-Unbelievable.
-It was nice.

You notice something?
Our luck is changing, Loll.

Can't you feel it?
We are really, truly blessed.

-Blessed. Blessed.
-[CHUCKLES]

WOMAN: Excuse me?

Could you please tell me
where to take the bus

-to the airport?
-Which airport?

There's three of them.

LOLLY: She probably want
Port Authority.

That's the main bus station.

Well, Port Authority's
the main station.

That's on the west side.

Yeah. But if you're leaving
from the east side,

you can get a bus
in front of Grand Central.

-That's 70 cents.
-Oh.

-I got it.
-No. Please.

Allow me.
[CHUCKLES]

Which airport are you leaving
from, Kennedy or La Guardia?

-Um, Newark?
-Newark?

Oh, then she should leave
from the Port Authority

-'cause that's closer to Jersey.-LOLLY: Yeah.

But you don't know what part
of town she's living from.

What part of town
are you leaving from?

KITTY: I don't know.
I'm sorry.

I don't speak any English.

Here you go.

-Are you gonna tip him?
-Yes. Of course.

Keep the change.

[BOTH CHUCKLES]

It's okay.
[CHUCKLES]

Where did she go?

Where's the bag?

Two hundred thousand dollars.

-Gone.
-They were professionals.

They knew what they were doing.They took the bag.

They knew exactly
what they were doing.

Sixteen thousand dollars
was ours.

Profit.
To be split 50-50.

-Eight grand apiece.-Loll, it was a simple mistake.

It could happen to anybody.

Anybody doesn't owe somebody
$234,000 by tomorrow.

Whose fault is it we're in thismess in the first place?

Not mine.
She was your friend.

Oh. Yeah, well,
who took it?

Who's the one who took it
in the first place?

You did.
It's your fault.

My fault?

Ha!

Oh, that's right.

Walk away.

Walk away like you walk away
from everybody.

I am not walking away
from everybody.

I am walking away from you.

Bullshit, Harriett!

Piss off, Layla!

[SCREAMS]

[GRUNTING]

[SCREAMING]

[GRUNTING]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

WOMAN: Lolly, don't be late
for The Mezzanine tomorrow.

[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]

[WHISTLING]

Where were you last night?
I was expecting you.

Something came up.

Interesting choice of words.

So what did you do?

Stella and I watched TV,

but there was nothing on,

so we just got to talking.

Yeah?

About what?

About everything.

About the accident.

About her crystals.

Oh, what accident?

Well, you see,

if two 2-B hadn't left
their garbage

in the middle of hallway,

then Stella wouldn't have
tripped on it

and fallen down
and broken both her legs.

And then if Leonard
hadn't driven his Kawasaki

into the Wonderbed truck
in Indianapolis,

I wouldn't have been able
to be here

and take care of her
and meet you

and take up my painting again.

See,

how sometimes
horrible things happen

for a very good reason?

You're one of a kind,
Sweet Face.

[GASPS]

Oh.

Oh, you picked diamonds.

What a beauty!

Gems.

[GIGGLING]

[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]

[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]

MAN: Hey, come on, beautiful.

Don't look so sad.

WOMAN:
Oh, baby. I feel so good.

Oh, that's yours.

SAM: These are great.
They feel--they feel great.

LOLLY: I don't think the strap

was supposed to stick up
like that, Sam.

SAM: What do--
oh, you mean like down like...

-LOLLY: Yeah. Yeah.
-SAM: Oh.

Yeah. They're great.

-Thanks.
-LOLLY: You're welcome.

Here. I also got this for you
two weeks ago,

before Chicago.

SAM: Wow. I hope you understandmy position.

If my agents and publishers
ever found out

that I was involved
with drug money,

I mean--I mean, let's face it.

Any bad publicity right now

would get in the way
of everything I'm trying to--

I mean, like,
you know, ruin,

like, my career, you know?

[SCOFFS] A Gucci watch?

Do you like it?

SAM: You got me a Gucci watch?

LOLLY: Yeah, well, I know
it's a bit extravagant, Sam,

but there were two ones
I could have chosen from.

One had a lizard strap
and this one was stainless.

And, you know, I didn't think

you wanna wear a reptile
on your arm, you know?

And stainless
is more casual and--

I wanna move in with you, Sam.

Uh, here.
I also got this for you.

Um, it goes with the watch.

I mean, you won't believe

what it's been like here
around here, Sam.

Hattie is crazy.
She's a maniac.

I just can't live with her
anymore.

Who?

LOLLY: My roommate.

What do you mean
you wanna move in with me?

Well, you know,

I know you have to move out
of your sublet.

SAM: I don't even have a place
of my own right now.

Well, I can move in with you
at your sister's.

You mean--you mean the two of us

live at my sister's
with my sister?

I wasn't even planningon spending a lot of time there,

uh, anyway. I mean,
I thought I was gonna be--

I was gonna be here.
I was gonna be there.

I was gonna be here.
I was gonna be there.

I was gonna be mostly here.

You're never here, Sam.

You're never here
when I need you.

You missed my tonsil operation.

SAM: That was the last game
of the World Series.

LOLLY: And every seder
my aunt ever had.

Don't dangle that
seder stuff.

Don't talk seder to me,
because it's kugel.

And kugel is poop.
I hate kugel. It's poop.

Well, I agree with you.

SAM: Wow.
What are we talking about?

About us.

We are talking about us.

SAM: We're talking about us?Tonight we're talking about us?

Tonight?I'm leaving for Boston tonight.

LOLLY: Boston?

You didn't tell me.

SAM: I did tell you.
I did tell.

You were ordering dishes

from that home shopping show
on TV.

Go, Sam.Why don't you just go right now?

Why do I have to pretendyou're here when you never are?

[SIGHS]

I heard about a sublet.

A sublet?

SAM: Yeah.
On Riverside with a view.

I thought you were gonna get
your own place?

It's Marcie's cousin's place.

Go. Go to Boston.

Loll, come here.

Get away from me.

Wow. You're upset.

Don't worry about your friend.

You--you'll pay her back.

She's not my friend.

And neither are you.

This yellow sponge
is now the surface sponge,

and I made this new blue spongethe dish sponge.

I thought the orange sponge
was the dish sponge.

The orange sponge
used to be the dish sponge

but then I made it
the surface sponge.

Don't tell me
you've been washing the dishes

with the surface sponge.

Since when did the orange spongebecome surface sponge?

Two weeks ago
it become the surface sponge.

You mean to tell me
you've been the dishes

with the surface sponge
for two weeks?

So what's the dish sponge?

This blue sponge
is now the dish sponge.

And I made this yellow sponge

the surface sponge

because you usedthe orange sponge on the floor.

So what's the orange sponge?

You're busted, baby.

-Where is she?
-She's not here yet.

I was just checking to see
if you can hear me.

LOLLY:Evanston, what is in your pants?

Pantyhose.

I'll be at the men's room
next door.

-LOLLY: Diane.
-Hi.

Welcome back.

Hey. What time did you came?

A couple of hours ago.

Oh. You got fantastic lipstick.

What's that called?

Blood.

[CHUCKLES]
Here is your bag, Di.

-Yeah. Take this now.
-Good. Good.

Thanks a lot.

I really appreciate this.

So good to be back in the city,you know?

I didn't do nothing down there
but make myself sick.

-Oh.
-Hey, ladies,

I wanna give you something
for taking care of this bag.

Oh. That's all right.
That's fine.

-That's not necessary really.
-I mean, we have...

Pardon me.
I'll be right back.

Ladies, uh, will you excuse me?

I'll just be a minute.

No matter what,
don't say anything.

[OVERLAPPING CONVERSATIONS]

Let me get this clear.

Exactly how much did you take?

We are going to pay back
every cent.

How much?

How much?

Two hundred and thirty-four...

DIANE: [CHUCKLES]
That's okay.

I was gonna you some anyway.

...thousand dollars.

[LAUGHTER]

She's joking, right?

It wasn't intentional.

DIANE: Come on, y'all,
tell me this isn't serious.

Come on.

I'm sorry, Di.

Damn.

HATTIE: Diane, we have
all the receipts right here.

LOLLY: Every single
receipt for everything

that we everything
that we ever paid for.

You know, these receipts
don't mean shit.

I trusted you.

That was my money.

I made that money.
I want that money.

And you're gonna give it to me.

Tonight, I'll wait
until after the show,

and then we're gonna go
to your place.

HATTIE: Di, wait a minute.

[BOTH SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

If you can't get it,

then I'll just have to break
your fingers

one by one.

Got it?

[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]

What are we gonna do?

We're gonna get our fingers
cut off.

Forget that stuff
about the fingers.

I changed my mind.
You got to take this for me.

-What?
-Just for tonight. I promise.

Now you want us to take it?

-Oh.
-Forget it.

Come on, Doll.

It's Loll.

-You owe me.
-Listen, this is insane.

I'm not doing it.
We got a show.

Yeah. We really have to go.

I'll take off half
of what you owe me.

Half?

Half.

All right. Just for tonight,
but that's it.

You're a real pal.

We really have to go.

Okay.

Tomorrow, midnight,
your place.

And keep your sticky fingers
off it.

The person who this belongs to

doesn't usually make a habit

of contributing to the arts.

Damn.

[CLEARS THROAT]

[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]

[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Officer Palamo.

You're under arrest.

[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]

Let's take a walk, Ike.

Joey doesn't like people
who don't do their job.

It's in a green bag, man.

She gave it to those
broads on stage.

MAN: On stage?

Ike, the whole world's a stage.

[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]

I thought you gave that
bag back.

-We did.
-Where are you going?

-Home.
-I'll call you tomorrow.

[CAR HORN HONKING]

MAN: Huh?

MAN: What are you doing?

MAN: You wanna fight?

You wanna fight?
You wanna hit me?

MAN: Yeah. Come on.
Come on. Come on.

-Hit me. Hit me. Hit me.
-Come on.

I don't have your money.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

MAN: 127 will do. Ten minutes.

WOMAN: Thank you. 127...

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

LOLLY: [GASPS]

-[TRUCK HORN HONKS]
-[TIRES SCREECHES]

-[GASPS]
-Lady, what are you crazy?

LOLLY: Taxi.

Taxi.

Wait.

Yo. Taxi.

Taxi.

Taxi.

Taxi.

Wait.

[TIRES SCREECHES]

Taxi.

Taxi.

Hey. Hey.

Taxi.

Wait. No.

Taxi.

Wait. Wait. Wait.

No. No.

No.

[TIRES SCREECHES]

WOMAN: So a first-grade boy
throws a first-grade girl

against the wall in the coatroom

and says, "I want what I want
when I want it."

The little girl says, "You'll
get what I got when I get it."

[LAUGHTER]

WOMAN: That's a good one.

Good.

WOMAN:
Joey's son said to his father,

"Dad, I need to borrow $50."

The father says,
"Forty dollars?

What do you need
to borrow $30 for?"

[LAUGHTER]

Hey. What's that?

-What?
-That?

-What?
-That bag.

Somebody's throwing
a perfectly good bag away?

-Maybe they lost it.
-Oh, I like the color.

You know, it goes with my hair.

WOMAN: Yeah. Mine too.

WOMAN: Oh, God. It's heavy.

WOMAN: Here. Let me help you.

WOMAN:
I like it. I could use it.

WOMAN: Yeah. So could I.

WOMAN: So we'll take turns.

-WOMAN: Oh.
-WOMAN: I wonder what's in it.

WOMAN: I don't know.

[DOOR OPENS]

[DOORBELL BUZZES]

[CRIES]

[DOORBELL BUZZES]

HATTIE: Who is it?

MAN: Metcalf from 5-B?

I'm having trouble with my key.

[CRIES]

How could you put it down?

How could you put something
like that down?

My shoe was untied.

Didn't you hear him
start up the engine?

-What are you deaf?
-They were fighting.

I was listening.

It's gone.
Do you understand?

Gone. I just hate this.

What are you doing?

That's Italian.

[CLATTER]

-LOLLY: Are you crazy?
-What's going on up there?

WOMAN:
Probably they're rehearsing.

But they're musicians.
They're not actors.

Better go up there
and tell them to knock it off.

It's late.

Reba will be down hereand we'll never get rid of her.

Oh.

Oh, how thoughtful.

How lovely.

For me?

STELLA: No.
They're for carrot top in 5-A.

They're from that boyfriend ofhers doesn't have an apartment.

Are you sure, Stella?

Yeah. I read the card.

They weren't in
so I signed for it.

That's nice for her.

HATTIE: I hate your cooking.

I hate your carrot juice.

I hate your coffee.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

Who is it?

MAN: Metcalf, 5-B.

Don't answer that please.
Stay in.

-Where's the bag?
-[GASPS]

I don't know. I lost it.

If you don't tell me
where it is,

I'm gonna blow this lips
right off.

-I'm gonna count till one.
-She's telling you the truth.

I swear she lost it.

My nose is running.

I was thinking more along
the lines of a Kleenex.

Oh, you ladies think
I'm fooling with you, huh?

Where's the bank notes?

[KNOCKS ON DOOR]

KITTY: Yoo-hoo.

Ladies.

Ladies,
I know you're in the there.

Oh, my. And I've been wondering

how you ladies stay
in such good shape.

And now I know. That's just
from walking five flights

of stairs every time
you wanna get anywhere.

[SIGHS] That does wonders
for one's figure.

-Not to mention...
-Shh. Get rid of her.

-...one's lungs.
-Okay.

I mean, sometimes--
I mean, if you smoke--

I knew you were home

because you were making
so much noise.

Hope everything's all right now,huh?

Well, I thought that
I should bring you these

as soon as possible

because from the looks
of things,

one of you,
if not both of you

has a gentleman caller.

Hello. [GASPS]

What the hell?

Move.

Move! Go. Move. Move.

You sit, and don't move.

WOMAN: Hey, you kids.
Hold it.

I said hold it right there.

-MAN: Louie, cover me.
-MAN: Oh, Jesus.

Just my luck.

Get up. Up. Up.

Get inside.

Move it. Inside. Let's go.

ALL: [SCREAMS]

-LOLLY: He's gonna kill us.
-KITTY: This is so exciting.

What is going on around here?

Kitty?

[SIRENS WAILING]

[HELICOPTER BLADES WHIRRING]

Oh, my violin.
Please don't hurt my violin.

Everything's gonna be fine.
It's gonna just fine.

My cello. My cello.

[CLATTER]

Freeze, mama.

All right. Put it down.

Nice and gentle.

Drop it or fall on it.

That's it.

Get your hand over here.

Be real sweet to me.

Faster. Faster. Faster.

Got it.

MAN: No, you don't.

[GUNSHOTS]

[SCREAMING]

That nearly hit you.

-Window.
-Window.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Help.

-Help. Help.
-COP: Get back inside.

Inside.

COP: You ladies up there,

I told you to get back.

Get back.
Ladies, get back inside.

COP: [INDISTINCT]

COP: Lady, please.
Out of the doorway.

I live here.

COP: I'm warning you two.

Get off the fire escape.

COP:
Around the other side.

LOLLY: he's gonna kill us.

COP: Get them in the car,
get them out of here.

He's gonna kill us.

[SCREAMING]

[GRUNTING]

STELLA: What is going on here?

Oh, God.

Where is my sister?

I don't know
where your sister is,

but this man under arrest
for murder.

-STELLA: Murder?
-I'm a cop.

Okay, punk.
Hold it right there.

COP: Freeze.

Bring him down nice and easy.

All right. I'll be there.
Stop the traffic.

[SIRENS WAILING]

WOMAN: My Stella.

My Stella.

Stella.

Kitty, get out of there.

Stella.

MAN: Get out. Quick.
This is dangerous.

Help.

[SCREAMS] Help.

Somebody's trying to kill us.

-Help.
-Don't worry. I'll...

-Are you sure?
-WOMAN: Help.

[SCREAMS]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

WOMAN: Help.

Help.

Help.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Palermo, what's going on?

What are you doing here?

MAN: I got an arrest.

Here we go, ladies.

Let's go. Let's go.
Come here. Get up.

[SCREAMS] How could you step
on my fingers?

-Take them in.
-WOMAN: I didn't see them.

WOMAN: How can you not see them?You know [INDISTINCT]

You fell right on top of me.

-You could have broken my bones.-Ladies.

-Ladies.
-Would you excuse us a moment.

I just have to talk
to these ladies.

Oh, sure. Talk. Talk.

Everybody talk.

Officer Palamo.

Where's the money?

She lost it.

Where?

Yeah. Where?

I don't know where.

I don't know where, okay?
Look, these guys are fighting.

You know,
my shoelace was untied.

I put it on
the back of this cab.

I don't know
what happened to it.

The cab left.
I tried to get it.

Let me tell you something,
ladies.

You could be in serious trouble.

You know, I could run you in.
I could book you.

I could hold you
for questioning.

Then I said to myself,

"They're pieces of fluff."

What's the point?

Your girlfriend confessed.

I caught her with a list of
Swiss bank notes a mile long.

I could put Diane
and that boyfriend of hers

away for years.

But what about the money?

Illegal gambling money
on its way to being washed.

That's what you spent.

You were just the two pigeons
she needed.

You know, my, uh--
my brother played the violin.

He was pretty good too.

Great hands.

Now, he's a dentist.

You mean--you mean
you're not gonna arrest us?

Oh, okay.
Well, goodnight, officer.

But we spent all...

What is on your face, huh?

What is that on your...

Hiya, Sweet Face.

I hope you're still coming
over tonight.

-Uh-hmm.
-Uh, so you're a cop.

God, I knew there something
familiar about you.

Are you taking them in?

Hey, what did they do?

Nothing any red-blooded Americanwouldn't have done.

Shop.

[PANTING]

[CLATTER]

My violin.

My cello.

It's okay.

[GROANS]

[LAUGHTER]

Here.

For me?

But I don't have anything
for you.

It's all right.
I bought it weeks ago.

[CHUCKLES] Shoulder pads.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry too.

[CHUCKLING]

The rent's due tomorrow.

[CELLO AND VIOLIN PLAYS]

GERTIE: Frances,
you took without telling.

FRANCES:
Gertie, you're crazy.

It's in your head.

GERTIE:
Don't tell me in my head.

I know what's in my head.

It's not what's in my head.

It's what's in your closet.

FRANCES: Oh, yeah?

What's in my closet?

GERTIE: Boxes. So many boxes.

FRANCES: Well,
they're Christmas presents.

GERTIE: Christmas presents?

In July?

[LAUGHTER]

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

♪ Out of control, control

♪ Woo

♪ Out of control, control

♪ Out of control, control

♪ Woo

♪ Out of control, control

♪ My pockets are empty

♪ My cupboards are bare

♪ The bills keep coming

♪ And the jobs are scarce

♪ I need some money

♪ I need some dough

♪ For the things I want

♪ For the things I hope

♪ I got sticky

♪ Sticky, sticky fingers

♪ I got sticky

♪ Sticky, sticky fingers

♪ Green looks pretty
with hungry eyes ♪

♪ You got the cash

♪ You get the prize

♪ I'm tired of waiting
for tomorrow to come ♪

♪ I want my time

♪ I want my prize

♪ I got sticky

♪ Sticky, sticky fingers

♪ I got sticky

♪ Sticky, sticky fingers

♪ My knees are weak,
my palms are wet ♪

♪ I got a fever
and it's making me sweat♪

♪ Can't seem to stop
to save my soul ♪

♪ I'm a fire that's burning
out of control ♪

♪ Woo

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

♪ Out of control, control

♪ Out of control, control

♪ Out of control, control

♪ Woo

♪ Out of control, control

♪ My pockets are empty

♪ My cupboards are bare

♪ The bills keep coming

♪ And the jobs are scarce

♪ I need some money

♪ I need some dough

♪ For the things I want

♪ For the things I hope

♪ I got sticky

♪ Sticky

♪ Sticky fingers

♪ I got sticky

♪ Sticky, sticky fingers

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]