Stealing Home (1988) - full transcript

Billy Wyatt is a washed-up baseball player who is called back home to handle the ashes of his childhood sweetheart/first love who had committed suicide. As he searches for what to do with them, he remembers the past and the relationship they had. In doing so he finds himself again.

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---
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
WARNER BROS., INC.

* OH! SAY CAN YOU SEE *

* BY THE DAWN'S EARLY LIGHT *

* WHAT SO PROUDLY WE HAILED *

* THROUGH THE TWILIGHT'S
LAST GLEAMING! *

* WHOSE BROAD STRIPES
AND BRIGHT STARS *

* THRO' THE PERILOUS FIGHT *

* O'ER THE RAMPARTS
WE WATCHED *

* WERE SO GALLANTLY STREAMING *

* AND THE ROCKETS' RED GLARE *

* THE BOMBS BURSTING IN AIR *



* GAVE PROOF
THRO' THE NIGHT... **

I WISH KATIE WERE HERE.

SHE'S THE ONE
WHO GOT ME TO PLAY AGAIN.

IF EVERYBODY NEEDS SOMEBODY
TO REMIND THEM WHO THEY ARE,

KATIE CHANDLER
WAS THAT FOR ME.

SIX MONTHS AGO,
I WAS AS FAR AWAY FROM BASEBALL

AS I COULD GET.

THINGS WEREN'T EXACTLY
HAPPENING FOR ME.

I WAS LIVING IN A MOTEL
WITH SOME COCKTAIL WAITRESS.

I WAS AS LOST
AS LOST COULD BE.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

BILLY, WE HAVE TO
HAVE A TALK.

LISTEN TO ME!

[FLY BUZZES]



WHAT?

HI, DANNY.

BILLY, YOU HAVE
A PHONE CALL.
IT'S YOUR MOM.

LOOK, DANNY, TELL HER I'M
AT WORK, OK? I'LL CALL HER BACK.

BILLY, IT'S
YOUR MOTHER.

HI.

BILL...

I HAVE SOME
TERRIBLE NEWS.

KATIE CHANDLER
DIED YESTERDAY.

HOW?

SHE SHOT HERSELF
AT SEASMOKE.

OH, MY GOD.

SHE LEFT A WILL.

YOU'RE RESPONSIBLE
FOR HER ASHES.

WHAT?

YOU'RE RESPONSIBLE
FOR HER ASHES.

SHE SAID THAT YOU
WERE THE ONLY PERSON

WHO WOULD KNOW WHAT
TO DO WITH THEM.

COME HOME, BILLY.

I'LL LEAVE TONIGHT.

KATIE WAS SO WILD,

AND SHE HATED RULES.

THAT'S WHY SHE WAS
THE GREATEST BABYSITTER

OF ALL TIME.

KATIE!

KATIE!

I'LL PUT THE BLANKET
UP FRONT.

KATIE, WE SHOULD
BE BACK EARLY.

IF WE'RE NOT,
THERE'S SOME LEFTOVERS
IN THE FRIDGE.

OH, BILLY CAN STAY UP
AND WATCH GUNSMOKE,

THEN HE SHOULD
GO TO BED.

BYE. HAVE FUN.

SAM!

[THE STAR-SPANGLED BANNER
PLAYING]

[CROWD CHEERING]

PLAY BALL!

SAM, WE'RE
ALL WAITING!

HANG ON!
I'LL BE RIGHT THERE!

TRYING TO FIND
MY WALLET.

TONY TAYLOR
STEPS UP TO THE PLATE.
HERE'S THE PITCH.

ALL RIGHT, BILLY.

TAYLOR SWINGS.
IT'S GONE!

CUBS LEAD, 1-0.

WE'RE IN TROUBLE.

I HATE THEM.

SAM!

YOU GOT TO
HAVE FAITH.

THEY'LL BOUNCE BACK.
IT'S ONLY THE FIRST INNING.

EVEN IF THEY DO LOSE,

TOMORROW I'LL TAKE YOU
TO THAT DOUBLE-HEADER.

COOL!

ALL RIGHT?
HERE. SEE YA.

ALVIN DARK SWINGS.
IT'S HIT. IT'S GONE!

CUBS LEAD, 2-0.

KATIE, STOP IT!

RELAX, MOM.
CAN I DRIVE
DADDY'S CADDY, HMM?

NO, YOU CAN'T.

LET'S GO.

UH-HUH.

SAM, DID YOU
FIND YOUR WALLET?

OH, YEAH.
IT WAS BEHIND
MY DRESSER.

OH...
WHAT HAVE WE HERE?

SAM, YOU ARE NOT
GETTING OUT OF THIS.

WE'RE DOWN 2-0,
BUT WE'RE COMING BACK!

[CAR HORN HONKS]

BYE-BYE.

BYE!

HEY, WHAT'S THE SCORE?

8-0, CUBS,
TOP OF THE THIRD.

MAYBE THEY'LL RALLY.

NO, THEY WON'T.
THEY NEVER RALLY.
THEY STINK.

I HATE THE PHILLIES.

YOU KNOW, I FORGOT
YOUR BIRTHDAY. SORRY.

I BOUGHT YOU A PRESENT.

* DA DA DA DA! **

IT'S A BASEBALL.

NOW, WHEN THINGS
GET CONFUSING--
AND THEY WILL--

THIS WILL REMIND
YOU THAT YOU'RE
A BALL PLAYER.

THANKS. IS IT TOO HOMO
TO WEAR AROUND MY NECK?

NO. DRIVE
THE GIRLS CRAZY,

ALL OF THEM.
TRUST ME.

THERE YOU GO.
LOOKIN' SHARP!

COOL.

I'M BORED. LET'S BLOW
THIS POP STAND, HUH?

WHERE?

GET YOUR SWIM SUIT.
MEET ME IN FIVE
MINUTES.

* YOU SHAKE MY NERVES,
AND YOU RATTLE MY BRAINS... *

WHERE ARE WE GOING?

TO THE SHORE!

THAT'S SO FAR.

WHAT ARE YOU? 80?
GET IN THE CAR.

WE'LL GET IN TROUBLE.

NO, WE WON'T.

YOU ALWAYS SAY THAT,
AND WE ALWAYS DO.

I'M IN CHARGE.

YOU HAVE TO
DO WHAT I SAY.

YEAH.

GET IN THE CAR.

* KISS ME, BABY,
OOOOH! *

WAIT A MINUTE.
DO YOU HAVE YOUR LICENSE?

NO!

HAVE YOU
DRIVEN A CAR?

YEAH, ONCE.
IN MY PARENTS'
DRIVEWAY.

OH, GOD!

RELAX.

* GOT TO TELL THIS WORLD *

* THAT YOU'RE MINE,
MINE, MINE, MINE *

* I CHEW MY NAILS, AND
THEN I TWIDDLE MY THUMBS... *

THANK YOU, DADDY!

AHA!

* COME ON, BABY,
YOU DRIVE ME CRAZY *

* GOODNESS GRACIOUS,
GREAT BALLS OF FIRE **

WE'RE GOING TO
TALK ABOUT GIRLS

BECAUSE
IN A COUPLE YEARS,

THAT'S ALL
YOU'LL BE ABLE
TO THINK ABOUT.

I'LL TELL YOU
WHAT GIRLS LIKE.

GIRLS LIKE GUYS
WHO MAKE THEM LAUGH.
RIGHT?

AND GIRLS LIKE GUYS
WHO TALK ABOUT
SOMETHING

OTHER
THAN THEMSELVES.

AND GIRLS LIKE GUYS
WHO DON'T BREAK
THEIR HEART.

OH, AND YOU KNOW
WHAT ELSE?

GIRLS LIKE GUYS
WHO SMOKE.

LET'S SMOKE.

HOLD THE WHEEL.

ME?

NOW!

THESE CIGARETTES
ARE WEIRD.

YEAH, I KNOW.
THEY'RE GRACE'S.

THEY'RE MENTHOLS.
HEE HEE!

THEY'RE STILL WEIRD.

I TELL YOU WHAT.
ON THE WAY HOME,

WE'LL PICK UP
SOME REAL COOL
CIGARETTES.

REMEMBER THAT GUY
I WAS TELLING YOU ABOUT?

I BROKE UP WITH HIM.
HE HAD BAD BREATH.

THERE'S THIS LIFEGUARD
I LIKE DOWN HERE.

I'M GOING OUT WITH HIM
THIS SUMMER.

HE'S GOT PERFECT BREATH.

HOW'S YOUR BREATH?
LET'S SEE.

GOOD.
KEEP IT THAT WAY.

LAST ONE IN
FRENCH KISSES MY GRANDFATHER!

IT WON'T BE ME!

WOO HOO! WOO!

* DREAM *

* DREAM, DREAM, DREAM *

* DREAM *

* DREAM, DREAM, DREAM *

* WHEN I WANT YOU *

* IN MY ARMS *

* WHEN I WANT YOU *

* AND ALL YOUR CHARMS... *

WHY ARE YOU
DOING THAT?

I DON'T KNOW.

WELL, DON'T.

* ...IS DREAM *

* DREAM, DREAM, DREAM... *

HEY...HEY!

YOU'RE 10.
I'M ALMOST 16.

IT WOULD
NEVER WORK,
BELIEVE ME.

OUR DEAL
IS TO BE BEST
FRIENDS, HUH?

* WHENEVER I WANT YOU *

* ALL I HAVE TO DO *

* IS DREAM **

WHAT'S THAT?

THAT'S THE WONDERFUL
DIVING HORSE.

THE FIRST TIME HANK BROUGHT ME
HERE WHEN I WAS LITTLE,

I WAS SO EXCITED.

I SAID, "THE HORSE
IS GOING TO FLY!"

THEY JUST DRAGGED THIS
POOR HORSE UP TO THIS PLATFORM

AND PUSHED HIM OFF
INTO A COLD TANK OF WATER.

EVERYBODY LAUGHED
AND THEY CLAPPED.

THEY THOUGHT
IT WAS REALLY FUNNY.

I CRIED.
I THOUGHT IT WAS MEAN.

LET'S GO!

* BO DIDDLEY BUY HIS BABY
A DIAMOND RING *

* IF THAT DIAMOND RING
DON'T SHINE *

YEE-HA!

* HE GONNA TAKE IT
TO A PRIVATE EYE *

* IF THAT PRIVATE EYE
CAN'T SEE *

* HE BETTER NOT TAKE
THE RING FROM ME *

* BO DIDDLEY, BO DIDDLEY,
HAVE YOU HEARD *

OH, NO!

HANK! HANK! HANK!

* MY PRETTY BABY
SAID SHE WANTS A BIRD... **

PULL OVER!

THIS ISN'T FUNNY!

WHAT'LL WE DO?

WAVE.

I COULDN'T BELIEVE
THAT KATIE LEFT ME HER ASHES.

I MEAN, WHY ME?

BOY, I WANTED TO
BAIL OUT,

BUT KATIE KEPT
PULLING ME HOME.

CARLTON!

NEXT STOP, CARLTON!

CARLTON!

NEXT STOP, CARLTON!

[VOICES]

BOTTOM OF THE NINTH,
TIE GAME.

WE'LL GO
INTO EXTRA INNINGS.

WE WON'T
MAKE THAT TRAIN.

HEY, RELAX,
APPLEBY.

WE WON'T
MAKE THAT TRAIN.

THAT MEANS
WE'RE NOT GOING HOME.

YOU WON'T
SEE ROBIN PARKS,

AND I DON'T HAVE
A PROM DATE.

I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS.

I'M TAKING CARE
OF IT, APPLEBY.

RELAX.

YEAH.

WE WON'T MAKE IT.

NEXT UP FOR CARLTON ACADEMY,
NUMBER 9, BILLY WYATT.

YAY!
YAY!

COME ON, BILLY!

COME ON, BILLY!

COME ON, BILLY!

PLAY BALL!

GO, BILLY.

COME ON, BILLY!

COME ON, BILLY!

ALL RIGHT, BILLY,
YOU GOT ONE!

GOOD GOING!

WAY TO GO, BILL!

NEXT UP, NUMBER 13,
ALAN APPLEBY.

COME ON, APPLEBY!

COME ON, WYATT!

SAFE!

AP! AP!
HEY, WAIT UP, AP!

COME ON.

WYATT!

BUD SCOTT.

NICE GAME.

THANK YOU, SIR.

WHAT ARE YOU
DOING THIS SUMMER?

I DON'T KNOW.

COME TO MY
INSTRUCTIONAL CAMP.

ARE YOU KIDDING?

I DIDN'T COME
UP FROM FLORIDA
TO WATCH YOU PLAY

JUST FOR A JOKE.

I'M MAKING YOU
AN OFFER, SON.

I GOT TO TALK
TO MY DAD.

YOU DO THAT, AND, UH...
HERE'S MY CARD.

YOU HAVE YOUR DADDY
CALL ME.

THANKS A LOT, SIR.

BUD SCOTT...
I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!

THANK YOU!

WHOA!

HEY, WHO WON?

WE DID!

BILLY BROKE UP A TIE
WHEN HE STOLE HOME!

NO!

YES!

HEY, ALAN, YOU KNOW
HOW TO WORK THESE?

OH, YEAH.

MAKE A LITTLE MOVIE
OF BILLY AND ME.

THE DINK HAS ONE.

WHO'S THAT?

IT'S APPLEBY'S
STEPFATHER.

SORRY, MR. WYATT.
HE'S A DINK.

HE WEARS SANDALS,
BERMUDA SHORTS,

SMOKES PARLIAMENTS,
AND DRIVES A LARK.

HE'S KILLING ME,
MR. WYATT.

HA HA!

APPLEBY.

GINNY...

I HAVE NEVER
LOVED YOU MORE

THAN I DO
RIGHT NOW.

APPLEBY!

THANKS FOR THE RIDE.

ALL RIGHT, ALAN.
SEE YOU SOON.
HERE YOU GO.

BILL, CAN I
TALK TO YOU FOR A SEC?

LET'S REVIEW
THE ROBIN PARKS
SITUATION.

I'M TIRED
OF TALKING
ABOUT HER.

YOU KNOW HER.
I DON'T.

I LOVE HER.
I'M A VIRGIN.
I'M DESPERATE.

NOW, BILL,
THEY ALL EQUAL,
POTENTIALLY,

THE BIG "F" FOR ME
AT THE PROM

IF YOU
COME THROUGH FOR ME.
BE MY FRIEND.

I WILL.
I PROMISE.

YOU WILL?
YOU PROMISE? BILL?

I GOT IT!

I MEAN IT.
SINCERELY.

BE...MY...FRIEND.

I GOT IT, APS.

BILL!

BE...

MY...

FRIEND!

IS SCHOOL
GOING OK?

YEAH.

YEAH? HOW'D YOU DO
ON THAT TRIG TEST?

"C".

LISTEN, BILLY.
YOUR MOTHER AND I
THINK YOU SHOULD TAKE

AN S.A.T. PREP COURSE
THIS SUMMER.

I WANT TO PLAY BALL.

YOU NEED HIGH
S.A.T.s TO GET INTO
A GOOD COLLEGE.

I JUST WANT TO PLAY
IN THE MAJORS.

COLLEGE GIVES YOU

SOMETHING TO
FALL BACK ON.

I DON'T NEED THAT.

MANY PLAYERS COME OUT OF
THE COLLEGE RANKS.

I'LL BE 22 THEN.

WELL, I'M SORRY.
THAT'S THE WAY IT IS.

BUD SCOTT WANTS ME
TO PLAY BALL FOR HIM
THIS SUMMER.

YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO
CALL HIM, I GUESS.

BUD SCOTT?
YOU'RE KIDDING.

UH-UH.

DO YOU KNOW
WHAT THIS MEANS?

NO S.A.T.s THIS SUMMER?

DAMN RIGHT!
YOU'RE GOING TO PLAY
FOR THE PHILLIES!

RELAX, DAD. HOLD IT!

GOD, YOU'LL LOOK GOOD
IN A PHILLIES UNIFORM!

YOU'RE GOING TO PLAY
CENTER FIELD FOR
THE PHILLIES!

CLEMENTE HITS
A LONG DRIVE.

WYATT!
HE'S GOING DEEP!

HE'S UP AGAINST
THE WARNING PATH!

AMAZING
OVER-THE-SHOULDER
CATCH!

HAULS IT IN,
THE CROWD GOES WILD.

YOU TIP YOUR HAT
TO MOM AND ME.

WHERE'S YOUR MOTHER?
TELL YOUR MOTHER.
GINNY!

HOLD ON, DAD!

TELL YOUR MOTHER!

DAD, RELAX!

GINNY! OH, BILLY!

DAD, RELAX, RELAX!

I'LL CALL BUD SCOTT!

NO! NO! YOU GOT TO BE
MUCH COOLER.

I KNOW!

HI. WHO WON?

WE DID!

BILLY STOLE HOME
TO WIN IT!

OH, MY GOD!
THAT'S WONDERFUL!

BUD SCOTT,
THE PHILLIES' TOP SCOUT,

WANTS BILLY TO PLAY
FOR HIM THIS SUMMER!

NO! OH, MY--OH!

HEY, MOM,
WHAT'S FOR DINNER?

ROAST BEEF,
MASHED POTATOES,
AND PEAS.

COME ON.
ONE MORE.

THERE WE GO.

NICE.

ALL RIGHT. THAT'S
GOOD TO CENTER.
ONE TO THE LEFT.

DAD,
YOU SURE YOU'RE OK?

ONE TO LEFT!

ALL RIGHT.

YEAH!

WOO!

YEAH! NICE!

ONE MORE.

YEAH! ALL RIGHT!
YEAH!

UP AGAINST THE WALL!

WAIT A MINUTE.
WORLD SERIES.

THE PHILLIES
AND THE YANKS.

THE PHILLIES UP BY 1.
BUNNING TAKES THE MOUND.

3-2 COUNT.

BASES LOADED.

BOTTOM OF THE NINTH!

CHECKS THIRD.
THE WIND-UP.

STRIKE 3! YES!

THE PHILLIES
WIN THE SERIES!

THE PHILLIES
WIN THE SERIES!

FIRST TIME
IN HISTORY!

GIVE DALRYMPLE
THAT GAME BALL!

WOO!

FIRST TIME EVER.

I GOT TO DRIVE
TO LONG ISLAND
TOMORROW.

YOU WANT TO COME?

I PROMISED APPLEBY
I'D PLAY GOLF WITH HIM.

CAN I COME NEXT TIME?

YEAH, SURE.

OH, HI.

NIGHT-NIGHT.

HA HA HA!

BILLY, HI.

HI, ROBIN.

COME ON IN.

CAN I GET YOU
SOMETHING TO DRINK?

UH, SURE.
PEPSI?

HELLO, BILLY!

HELLO, MRS. PARKS!

I'D COME DOWN
AND SAY HI,

BUT I LOOK
A MESS.

THAT'S OK.

THANKS.

MM-HMM.

SO HOW'S IT
GOING?

ALL RIGHT.
HOW'S SCHOOL?

IT'S OK.

YOU LOOK GREAT.

YEAH?

YEAH.

SO DO YOU.

YEAH?

YEAH.

LISTEN, UH...
YOU KNOW ALAN APPLEBY,
RIGHT?

YEAH...

HOW ABOUT A DRINK?

I GOT ONE.

I MEAN A RUM DRINK.

BILLY, HONEY,
IF YOU'RE HUNGRY,

I THINK THERE'S SOME LEFTOVER
MEAT LOAF IN THE FRIDGE.

THAT'S OK, MRS. PARKS.
I'VE ALREADY EATEN.

WELL, HOW ABOUT
SOMETHING TO DRINK?

I THINK ROBIN'S
TAKING CARE OF THAT,
THANK YOU.

WELCOME HOME.

YOU WANT TO HEAR
SOME MUSIC?

SURE, I GUESS.

I GOT TO TALK TO YOU
ABOUT ALAN APPLEBY

BECAUSE HE ASKED ME
TO COME OVER HERE

AND ASK YOU IF YOU
WANTED TO GO

TO THE CARLTON PROM
WITH HIM.

DID YOU KNOW
I'VE BEEN IN LOVE WITH YOU

SINCE THIRD GRADE?

REALLY?

YEAH.

HMM.

* SHA LA LA LA LA *

* SHA LA LA LA LA *

* IT'S NOT THE WAY YOU SMILE *

* THAT TOUCHED MY HEART *

* SHA LA LA LA LA *

* IT'S NOT THE WAY YOU KISS *

* THAT TEARS ME APART *

* OH, OH, OH,
MANY, MANY NIGHTS ROLL BY *

* I SIT ALONE AT HOME
AND CRY *

* OVER YOU *

* WHAT CAN I DO? *

* I CAN'T HELP MYSELF *

* WHEN, BABY, IT'S YOU *

COME HERE.

* SHA LA LA LA LA LA *

* BABY, IT'S YOU *

* SHA LA LA LA LA LA *

* SHA LA LA LA LA-- *

* SHA LA LA LA LA-- *

* SHA LA LA LA LA-- *

HONEY, THE RECORD
IS STUCK.

SORRY.

JESUS, YOUR MOTHER
CAN COME DOWN HERE
ANY MINUTE.

DON'T WORRY
ABOUT MY MOTHER.

BESIDES, I CAME HERE
TO GET ALAN A DATE.

I DON'T WANT TO
TALK ABOUT ALAN ANYMORE.

OK.

* SHA LA LA LA LA *

* SHA LA LA LA LA *

* IT'S NOT THE WAY YOU SMILE *

* THAT TOUCHED MY HEART *

* SHA LA LA LA LA *

* IT'S NOT THE WAY YOU KISS *

* THAT TEARS ME APART *

* OH, OH, OH *

* MANY, MANY NIGHTS ROLL BY *

* I SIT ALONE AT HOME
AND CRY *

* OVER YOU *

* WHAT CAN I DO? *

* I CAN'T HELP MYSELF *

* WHEN BABY, IT'S YOU *

* SHA LA LA LA LA LA LA *

* BABY, IT'S YOU *

* SHA LA LA LA LA LA LA *

* SHA LA LA LA LA *

* YOU SHOULD HEAR
WHAT THEY SAY... **

ROBIN? DO YOU KNOW
WHERE TODAY'S
NEWSPAPER IS?

IT'S ON
THE BREAKFAST TABLE.

I'M GOING TO
CALL THAT BOY
AND...

We got to stop.
We got to stop.

Jesus, Jesus.
We got to...

I PUT IT OUT
TO DRY,

AND I DON'T KNOW
WHERE IT IS.

I THINK
IT WAS OUT
ON THE PORCH.

WAIT A MINUTE.
HERE IT IS.

ON THE TELEPHONE TABLE.

HONESTLY.

IF MY HEAD WASN'T ATTACHED,
I'D LOSE THAT, TOO.

WELL. OK.
GOOD NIGHT,
YOU TWO.

GOOD NIGHT,
MRS. PARKS!

* SHA LA LA
LA LA LA **

IT'S A COOL PENDANT.
CAN I HAVE IT?

SURE.

AM I GOING TO
SEE YOU AGAIN?

YEAH.

I MEAN,
UH, SURE.

WHAT ARE
YOU DOING
THIS SUMMER?

NOTHING.
JUST HANGING AROUND.

HOW ABOUT YOU?

PLAYING PRO BALL
DOWN IN FLORIDA.

GREAT.

WELL, UH...

THANKS FOR
THE PEPSIS...

AND EVERYTHING.

WOO!

WOO!

[DOG BARKING]

WOOO!

HEY, BILL!

HEY, BILL.

DEAD CENTER.
PERFECT.

SORRY I'M LATE.

DIDN'T MATTER.

HOW ARE YOU DOING?

GOOD.

SEE ROBIN
LAST NIGHT?

OH, YEAH.

DID YOU MENTION
THE PROM?

UH, NO.

DID YOU MENTION ME?

ALAN,
I COULDN'T--

YOU HAD SEX
WITH MY PROM DATE.

APPLEBY, I'LL
TALK TO HER
TONIGHT.

WHY DON'T YOU
HAVE MORE SEX WITH HER?

I DIDN'T
TOUCH HER.

DON'T LIE TO ME, BILL.

YOU'RE BEING
RIDICULOUS.

I DIDN'T TOUCH HER.

I ASKED YOU TO DO ME
ONE LITTLE FAVOR,

AND NOW
YOU LIE TO ME.

YOU HAD SEX
WITH MY PROM DATE.

YOU...

HAD...

SEX...

WITH...

MY PROM DATE!

[POLICE RADIO]

[DOORBELL RINGS]

[DOOR OPENS]

OH, MY GOD.

WHAT'S WRONG?

YOUR FATHER'S BEEN
IN A CAR ACCIDENT.

HE'S DEAD,
ISN'T HE?

[CHOIR SINGING]

I REMEMBER.
IT'S LITERALLY POURING OUTSIDE,

AND SAM, IN A PANIC,
PULLS THE CAR OVER.

HE LEAPS OUT
AND SPRINTS TO THIS CHURCH.

HE'S HOLDING
THE SEAT OF HIS PANTS.

HE DISAPPEARS
BEHIND THE CHURCH,
AND THERE'S NO TOILET PAPER.

AND NOW
ALL THE PEOPLE

ARE SCREAMING AT HIM
AT THE CHURCH.

AND SAM YELLS
AT THE TOP OF HIS LUNGS,

"DO YOU HAVE
ANY TOILET PAPER,

KLEENEX,
OR ANYTHING?"

GINNY YELLS BACK,

"NO, DARLING.

"WHY DON'T YOU USE SOME OF THOSE
WET NEW ENGLAND LEAVES

YOU DRAGGED US UP HERE
TO SEE?"

YOU KNOW,

SAM AND I GO TO
THE PIER EVERY YEAR.

DID YOU KNOW THAT'S
WHERE WE FIRST MET?

I WAS 18.

I WAS STAYING
WITH MY PARENTS.

OH, GOD.
HE WAS A CHARMER.

HE WAS GOOD-LOOKING
AND FUNNY.

THE BEST-DRESSED MAN
I HAD EVER SEEN.

WE HAD OUR HONEYMOON
RIGHT THERE,

AND EVERY YEAR SINCE
WE ALWAYS GO BACK.

GOING TO THE PIER
EVERY YEAR

IS JUST SOMETHING
THAT WE ALWAYS DO.

LET'S GO
FOR A RIDE.

WHEN I WAS
A LITTLE GIRL,

I USED TO LOVE
TO GO SWIMMING

IN MY
GRANDFATHER'S POOL,

BUT I WAS SCARED
OF THE DEEP END.

ONCE WHEN I WAS
ABOUT 8 OR 9,

I WENT OVER
TO THE POOL

AND DOVE ALL THE WAY
TO THE BOTTOM.

I TOUCHED
THE DRAIN.

IT WAS ALL SLIMY
AND GREEN WITH MOSS.

I FIGURED IT WOULD
JUST SUCK ME IN,

AND IT DIDN'T,
AND I SWAM

ALL THE WAY
TO THE TOP,

BROKE CLEAN
OUT OF THE WATER.

I FELT GREAT.

YEAH?

YEAH.

EVERY TIME SOMETHING
BAD WOULD HAPPEN--

LOSE A DOG OR...

I'D GET IN A FIGHT
WITH GRACE

OR I GOT KICKED
OUT OF SCHOOL--

I'D GO OVER
TO THE POOL

AND I'D TOUCH
THE DRAIN.

IT ALWAYS MADE ME
FEEL BETTER.

WANT TO TOUCH
THE DRAIN?

WHEN?

NOW.

YOU HAVE TO
KEEP IT DOWN A LITTLE BIT.

WHY?

MY GRANDFATHER
DOESN'T LIVE HERE ANYMORE.

WHOSE POOL
IS THIS?

I DON'T KNOW.

COME ON, KIDDO.

AH HA!

FEEL BETTER?

I GUESS.

MOM?

HEY, MOM.
HO.

WELL,
THERE YOU ARE.

HI.

MY BABY SISTER.

[THUNDER]

WHEN'S
THE BABY DUE?

TWO MONTHS.

WHERE WILL YOU LIVE?

HERE.
ON THE THIRD FLOOR.

YOU'RE KIDDING.

THAT'S PERFECT.

MOM, CAN I MOVE
IN HERE WITH YOU?

IF YOU MOVE IN,
I'M MOVING OUT.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

THAT MUST BE
HANK AND GRACE.

HI.

HI.

THANK YOU.

HANK.

HI.

HI, BILLY.

HANK.

IT'S BEEN
A WHILE, HUH?

WHY DON'T WE GO INTO
THE LIVING ROOM?

GRACE WASN'T UP TO
COMING OVER.

CAN I GET YOU
SOMETHING?

I'M FINE.

BILLY, UM,

KATIE LEFT A WILL.

SHE WANTED HER BODY
TO BE CREMATED,

AND SHE WANTED YOU
TO BE RESPONSIBLE

FOR HER ASHES.

DID SHE SAY

WHAT SHE WANTED ME
TO DO WITH THEM?

NO. I GUESS SHE JUST
THOUGHT YOU'D KNOW.

I DON'T.

WELL, IF IT'S
ANY HELP TO YOU,

GRACE AND I
WOULD LIKE

A MEMORIAL SERVICE
AT ST. THOMAS',

AND WE WOULD LIKE
HER ASHES
BURIED THERE.

WHEN KATIE CAME BACK
FROM EUROPE

AFTER HER SECOND MARRIAGE
HAD FAILED,

I KNEW SHE WASN'T
A HAPPY WOMAN,

BUT I DIDN'T KNOW
WHAT TO DO.

I DIDN'T KNOW
HOW TO HELP.

SHE AND GRACE
STARTED FIGHTING AGAIN,

SO SHE GOT IN
HER OLD VOLKSWAGEN,

DROVE DOWN
TO SEASMOKE,

AND DECIDED
TO LIVE THERE YEAR-ROUND.

I WANTED TO SEE
HOW SHE WAS DOING.

LAST SUNDAY
I DROVE DOWN THERE.

I WALKED IN THE HOUSE.

I CALLED HER NAME.
SHE DIDN'T ANSWER.

I THOUGHT SHE WAS OUT
TAKING A WALK.

I POURED MYSELF A DRINK,

AND THEN I WENT
INTO THE BEDROOM.

THERE SHE WAS,

LYING ON THE BED, ALL CURLED UP
LIKE A LITTLE GIRL.

I THOUGHT
SHE WAS ASLEEP.

WELL,

UH, I GOT TO
GET BACK TO GRACE.

BILLY, YOU THINK
ABOUT ST. THOMAS', OK?

YEAH.

Jesus.

[KNOCK KNOCK]

MOM.

MMM?

HEY.

WHAT?

I'M LEAVING.

BUT YOU JUST
GOT HOME.

YEAH. I KNOW,
BUT I GOT TO GO.

WHAT ABOUT KATIE?

KATIE?

YEAH. RIGHT.

THAT'S WHAT
I WANTED TO TALK
TO YOU ABOUT.

I LEFT HER URN
IN MY CLOSET,

AND I WAS WONDERING
IF YOU...

MAYBE, UH...

COULD TAKE CARE
OF IT FOR ME.

KATIE WANTED YOU
TO DO THAT.

YEAH, I KNOW,

BUT DOES IT
REALLY MATTER
WHO BURIES HER?

COME ON.

SHE'S DEAD, RIGHT?
IT'S JUST ASHES.

OF COURSE IT MATTERS.

IT'S KATIE'S ASHES.

WHAT AM I
SUPPOSED TO DO
WITH HER?

I DON'T KNOW.

I DO KNOW SHE LEFT
HER ASHES TO YOU.

NOT TO HANK,
NOT TO GRACE,
NOT TO ANYBODY ELSE.

BILL, YOU CAN'T
WALK AWAY FROM THIS.

MM-HMM.

GREAT.

WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

I DON'T KNOW.

FOR A DRIVE,
I GUESS.

AND YOU'RE COMING BACK?

YEAH.

THAT SUMMER
AFTER DAD DIED,

WE STAYED
DOWN AT SEASMOKE.

HEY, BILL.

TOMORROW'S THE 4th OF JULY.

WE NEED DATES.

IT'S A WELL-KNOWN FACT

THAT WOMEN
TEND TO PUT OUT MORE
ON THE 4th OF JULY

THAN ON ANY OTHER NIGHT
OF THE YEAR.

SPEAKING OF DATES, BILL,

I'LL ASK YOU
ONE LAST TIME.

DID YOU HAVE SEX
WITH MY PROM DATE?

SHE WAS NEVER
YOUR PROM DATE.

THAT'S BECAUSE
YOU HAD SEX WITH HER, BILL.

YOU'RE NOT
THE ONLY GUY

WITH FEELINGS
FOR ROBIN PARKS.

FEELINGS FOR?

YOU JUST ADMITTED IT.
YOU HAD SEX WITH HER.

APS, WOULD YOU
CALM DOWN?

I'M NOT ADMITTING
ANYTHING.

WHO'S THAT WOMAN?

I DON'T KNOW.

I THINK
THAT'S THE LADY

WHO'S RENTING
THE CHANDLER
COTTAGE.

NO. THAT'S THE LADY
WHO WILL BEAR MY CHILDREN.

AP, SHE'S WAY OUT
OF YOUR LEAGUE.

EAT MY DUST, PAL.

WHY RUSH IT?

I'M GOING TO
MAKE HER BEG.

I WANT A DATE
WITH ONE OF THOSE
JERSEY GIRLS, BILL.

I LOVE JERSEY GIRLS.

THEY WEAR BLACK BRAS
AND WHITE LIPSTICK.

WHEN THEY
FRENCH KISS YOU,

I BET THEY PUT
THEIR BUBBLE GUM

IN YOUR MOUTH.

THEY'LL LET US
SNIFF THEM ALL OVER.

APS, YOU'VE GOT
A BIG PROBLEM.

YEAH, BILL, I DO.

BILL, HER LIGHTS
ARE ON.

THERE SHE IS.

OH, GOD.

OH, MY GOD.

SHE IS SO BEAUTIFUL.

DAMN IT.

COME ON,
LET'S GO, APS.

IT'S OVER.

YEAH. YEAH, I THINK I'LL
STICK AROUND HERE FOR A BIT.

APPLEBY,
YOU'RE SO SICK.

I KNOW THAT.

DON'T LEAVE YET.

OK.

[CAR DOOR SLAMS]

WHAT'S HIS NAME?

DOOBIE EPSTEIN.

DOOBIE EPSTEIN
IS HIS NAME?

YEAH.

ARE YOU KIDDING?

I'M NOT KIDDING.

HE'S THE MOST COMPLEX MAN
I'VE EVER MET.

GRACE HATES HIM,
OF COURSE.

HE'S NOT
A LAWYER
OR BANKER

OR SOMETHING
SO PRACTICAL
AND NAUSEATING

YOU JUST WANT
TO SLASH
YOUR WRISTS.

I'M MEETING HIM
IN NEW YORK

IN A COUPLE
OF DAYS.

WE'LL ELOPE AND
MOVE TO EUROPE.

YOU'RE
GETTING
MARRIED?

YEAH.

WHY?

WHY NOT?

WHAT WILL YOU DO
AFTER THAT?

WE'LL GO EVERYWHERE.
WE'LL DO EVERYTHING.

WE'LL GO TO PAMPLONA
AND RUN WITH THE BULLS.

WE'LL GO TO PARIS,
HANG OUT AT THE LEFT BANK,

TALK ABOUT EXISTENTIALISM
AND REVOLUTION.

IT'S GOING TO BE GREAT.
I'M SO IN LOVE WITH HIM.

YOU MEAN LIKE YOU FELL
IN LOVE WITH THAT GUY

JUST BECAUSE HE LOOKED
LIKE MONTGOMERY CLIFT?

HE DIDN'T LOOK
ANYTHING LIKE
MONTGOMERY CLIFT.

OR THE PROFESSOR WHO WANTED
TO TAKE YOU TO TIBET.

I DIDN'T GO.

OR THE LIFEGUARD,
HAD REALLY GREAT BREATH.

SHUT UP.
HE'S DIFFERENT.

THIS GUY'S
DIFFERENT.

HE'S DIFFERENT.

GREAT. THAT'S GREAT.

HEY, YOU OK?

IT'S LIKE
EVERYTHING'S ALL NORMAL

EXCEPT...

I DON'T GIVE A SHIT
ABOUT ANY OF IT.

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

WELL, WELCOME TO
THE CLUB, KIDDO.

HEY, WHERE'S
YOUR PENDANT?

I GAVE IT TO SOME GIRL.

YOU GAVE IT--

WHO?

ROBIN PARKS.

WHY?

SHE ASKED ME FOR IT.

WERE YOU
DATING HER?

NO.

IS SHE
YOUR GIRLFRIEND?

NO.

SPIT IT OUT.

I WENT TO GET A DATE
FOR APPLEBY FOR THE PROM.

SHE ASKED ME FOR IT,
SO I GAVE IT TO HER.

YOU GAVE IT
TO SOME GIRL
YOU BARELY KNOW?

YOU'RE MARRYING
SOME GUY YOU BARELY KNOW.

THIS IS
DIFFERENT.

I GAVE YOU
THAT PENDANT
FOR LIFE.

THIS IS DIFFERENT, TOO.

I LOST
MY VIRGINITY TO HER.

WAY TO GO,
BILLY.

WAY TO GO.

YOU STILL
SHOULDN'T HAVE
GIVEN IT TO HER.

I KNOW.

HOW WAS IT?

IT WAS GREAT.

I DON'T KNOW.

I'D NEVER
DONE IT BEFORE, ACTUALLY.

I PROBABLY WASN'T LIKE
GOOD OLD DOOBIE.

PROBABLY NOT.

[THE GIRL FROM IPANEMA PLAYING]

OH, NO.

OH, YES.

OH, I LOVE YOU.

OH, NO.

PLEASE, GOD.

TURN THE LIGHT
BACK ON.

* HEY, MR. POSTMAN... *

THAT'S IT.

YOU KNOW WHAT
I THINK YOU NEED?

MORE MARTINIS.

RIGHT.

YES.

* OH, YEAH... *

TELL ME ONE MORE TIME.

I CAN'T GET
THE HIPS RIGHT.

SEE, YOU GOT IT.

* POISON IVY *

* POISON IVY *

* LATE AT NIGHT
WHILE YOU'RE SLEEPIN' *

* POISON IVY COME
A-CREEPIN' ALL AROUND **

* SHE'S AS PRETTY
AS A DAISY *

* BUM BA BUM BA BA *

* BUT LOOK OUT, MAN,
SHE'S CRAZY *

* BUM BA BUM BA BA *

* SHE'LL REALLY DO YOU IN *

* BUM BA BUM BA BA *

* IF YOU LET HER
GET UNDER YOUR SKIN *

* POISON IVY *

* POISON IVY **

* PLEASE, MR. POSTMAN,
LOOK AND SEE... *

AHH!

OHH!

YOU'RE HOME AGAIN!

LOOK, LOOK, LOOK.

KATIE HAS HAD
A DISASTROUS EFFECT--

NO, I HAVEN'T.

ON YOUR POOR, DEAR
INNOCENT MOTHER.

KATIE, WHO ACTUALLY,
ACTUALLY I ADORE,

HAS TAUGHT ME
THE TWIST.

YEAH.

LOOK AT THAT.

* WAIT A MINUTE,
MR. POSTMAN... **

ALAN!

I'LL TWIST.
I'LL TWIST.

ALAN APPLEBY.

I HAVE A QUESTION.

HAVE YOU EVER HAD
A MARTINI?

NEVER.

NEVER?
OH, MY BOY,

THIS IS
THE MOMENT.

CAN I HAVE--

I WANT A SMOKE.

MOM,
COME ON.

GET ME
A CIGARETTE.

[GINNY]
NOW, MY LITTLE TWISTERS,
HOME MOVIES.

[BILLY]
WHAT ARE WE GOING TO SEE?

I DON'T KNOW.
THERE WAS SOME FILM
LEFT IN THE CAMERA.

[KATIE]
THINK IT'S A TRAIN
MAYBE?

MAYBE
IT'LL STOP SOON.

I DOUBT IT.

THERE'S
A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN.

THINK
YOU'RE OBSESSED?

I KNOW
WHAT THIS IS.

BILL, THIS IS
THE DAY YOU STOLE HOME.

RIGHT. RIGHT. RIGHT.

THERE'S A COUPLE
OF STUDS FOR YOU.

AW, LOOK.

HELLO! HELLO.

I SHOT THIS!

THOSE GIRLS LOVED ME.

IN YOUR DREAMS.

OH, THANK YOU.

THEY LOOK LIKE
THEY'RE REALLY GOOD
AT TENNIS, TOO.

YOU SHOT ENOUGH
FILM OF THEM, ALAN.

[CRYING]

* SHERRY *

* SHERRY, BABY *

* SHERRY *

SHE'S A GODDESS.

GO TALK TO HER.

I CAN'T.

* SHERRY, BABY *

YOU BETTER.

TOMORROW
WE'RE LEAVING.

I KNOW.

I HAVE TO WORK
FOR THE DINK.

WHAT A NIGHTMARE.

ARE YOU GOING TO
PLAY FOR BUD SCOTT
THIS SUMMER OR WHAT?

NAH. I'M THROUGH
WITH BASEBALL.

HEY!
SHE'S LOOKING AT YOU.

SHE IS?

GO AHEAD, ALAN.
MAKE YOUR MOVE.

SHE WANTS YOU.

I'M A WOMAN.
I KNOW THESE THINGS.

* TO MY TWIST PARTY *

OH, BOY.

* WHERE THE BRIGHT
MOON SHINES *

* COME ON *

* WE'LL DANCE
THE NIGHT AWAY *

* I'M GONNA MAKE YOU
MI-I-INE *

* SHE-E-RRY... *

HI.

HI.

I'M, UH,
I'M ALAN APPLEBY.

YOU HAVE PEANUT BUTTER
ON THE CORNER OF YOUR MOUTH.

OH, GOD.

YOU'RE THE BOY
WHO WATCHES ME
EVERY NIGHT.

NO. NO. I--

IT'S ALL RIGHT.

I LIKE IT.

I MISSED YOU
LAST NIGHT.

I WAS THERE, REALLY.

HA HA! I KNOW.
I WAS ONLY KIDDING.

HO. HO HO!

KIDDING.

CAN YOU MAKE IT
TONIGHT?

TONIGHT?

UM, LET ME SEE
WHAT MY PLANS ARE.

YEAH.
I CAN MAKE IT TONIGHT.

GREAT.
I'LL MAKE IT SPECIAL.

SPECIAL.

OH, MY GOD.

* YOU MAKE ME
LOSE MY MIND *

* SHE-E-RRY *

BYE.

BYE.

* BABY *

* SHERRY, BABY *

* SHERRY,
CAN YOU COME OUT TONIGHT? *

* COME, COME... **

[KNOCK KNOCK]

HELLO?

IT'S ME.

ALAN APPLEBY.

HELLO.

COME ON IN.

I GUESS I COULD HAVE
USED THE DOOR.

HI.

HI.

COME HERE.

RIGHT.

OH. FOR YOU.

THANK YOU.

HOW SWEET.

SIT DOWN.

WOULD YOU
DO ME A FAVOR?

YEAH.

WOULD YOU PUT
SOME OF THIS
ON MY SHOULDERS?

SURE.

I'D, UH,
LOVE TO DO THAT.

IS THAT ABOUT
WHAT YOU HAD IN MIND?

MMM.

IT'S LOVELY.

I DON'T EVEN
KNOW YOUR NAME.

LESLIE.

LESLIE.

LESLIE JORDAN.

IT'S, UH...

VERY NICE TO MEET YOU,
LESLIE JORDAN.

OH, BOY.

THIS IS--

THIS IS--OH, GOD!

YOU KNOW, I WAS TALKING
TO MY FRIEND BILL WYATT

JUST THE OTHER DAY

THAT IF I COULD DO
WHAT I'M DOING RIGHT NOW,

I'D BE HAPPY.

YEAH. THIS DEFINITELY
MAKES MY SUMMER.

THEN THIS SHOULD
MAKE YOUR WHOLE YEAR.

OH, MY GOD.

WHAT'S HOPE DOING UP?

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?

WE WENT
TO THE STORE.

WE JUST STOPPED
FOR A DRINK.

YOU'RE DRUNK.

WHO'S THIS GUY?

IT'S FRANK.

PICKING UP GUYS
IN BARS?

STOP IT NOW!

LEAVE NOW!

BILLY!

OH!

STOP IT, GUYS!

STOP IT!

[BABY CRYING]

COME ON!

NO, BILLY!

SHUT UP, BILLY!

JUST STOP IT!

BILLY.

BILLY!

BILLY,
ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

GET OUT OF HERE!
YOU MAKE ME SICK!

MY DAD'S BEEN DEAD
TWO MONTHS,

AND YOU'RE GETTING
MOM DRUNK AND
PICKING UP GUYS.

I'LL BRING HOME
ANYBODY I WANT.

YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY KID
WHO LOST HIS FATHER.

SHE LOST HER HUSBAND!

IF I CAN GIVE HER
A LAUGH, I WILL.

THEN MAKE HER
ANOTHER DRINK!

FUCK YOU, KATIE!

MOM?

I'M NOT GOING TO
GO HOME TODAY.

OH, UH, WHAT ARE
YOU GOING TO DO?

STAY WITH KATIE,
I GUESS.

OH. IS IT BECAUSE
OF LAST NIGHT?

NO.

I--I'M SO SORRY
ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED.

I HAD TOO MUCH TO DRINK.

WHAT I DID WAS WRONG,

BUT I WANT YOU
TO KNOW SOMETHING.

I WOULD NEVER HURT YOU,
NEVER HURT THIS FAMILY.

IT'S YOU AND ME
AND HOPE NOW.

THAT IS ALL WE HAVE,

BUT WE'RE GOING TO
BE OK.

OK?

I JUST KEEP THINKING
DAD'S AWAY ON A BUSINESS TRIP,

HE'S GONNA COME BACK.

HMM.

I KNOW.

WHAT CAN I SAY,
WILLIAM?

I CAME HERE A BOY,
AND I'M LEAVING A MAN.

I'M HAPPY
FOR YOU, APS.

BE PATIENT.
YOUR TIME WILL COME.

IT'S WORTH THE WAIT.
BYE, BILL.

BYE, APS.

NO, NO, NO, NO.

I'VE GOT TO MEET
WITH SAM'S LAWYER

TOMORROW MORNING.

IT'S ALL RIGHT
ABOUT BILLY STAYING?

YEAH.

BYE. BYE, BILLY.

BYE, MOM.

* CAN YOU GO BACK IN TIME *

* TO A PLACE IN YOUR MIND? *

* TO THE ONE WHO KNEW
A PART OF YOU *

* THAT YOU JUST
COULDN'T FIND *

* IF YOU ASK ME TO CHOOSE *

* BETWEEN A MEMORY OR TWO *

* WHEN IT'S SAID AND DONE *

* I'LL TAKE THE ONE *

* WHOSE LOVE I HAD TO LOSE *

* 'CAUSE WHEN *

* SHE DANCED *

* I LOST MY INNOCENCE *

* I LOVED HER THEN *

* I ALWAYS WILL *

* SHE LEFT *

* IT'S STILL *

* WITH ME *

* A BURNIN' MEMORY *

* SHE TOOK WITH HER *

* PART OF ME *

* CAN YOU GO BACK IN TIME *

* TO A PLACE IN YOUR MIND? *

* TO THE ONE WHO KNEW
A PART OF YOU *

* THAT YOU JUST
COULDN'T FIND *

* LOOKIN' BACK,
I'M NOT SURE *

* IF I WON OR LOST
THE WAR *

* WHEN SHE DANCED WITH ME *

* OUR HEARTS WERE FREE *

* AS FAR AS I COULD SEE *

* WHEN SHE DANCED WITH ME *

* OUR HEARTS WERE FREE *

* AS FAR AS I COULD SEE **

I GOT TO GO.

PROMISE ME
SOMETHING, HUH?

WHAT?

YOU'RE GOING TO
CALL UP BUD SCOTT,

AND YOU'RE GOING TO
START PLAYING AGAIN.

YOU'RE A BALL PLAYER,
THAT'S WHO YOU ARE.

WHAT'S GOING TO
HAPPEN TO YOU?

I DON'T KNOW.
DON'T WORRY ABOUT ME.

GET MY PENDANT BACK.

I WILL.

I LOVE YOU, BILLY BOY.

THAT'S THE LAST TIME
I EVER SAW HER.

APPLEBY!

BILL!

HEY, BILL.

HEY, AP.

HOW YOU DOIN'?

NYAH.

HEARD ABOUT KATIE, HUH?

YEAH.

UNBELIEVABLE.

WANT TO GET DRUNK?

SURE.

* ...COMES A-CREEPIN' AROUND *

* WELL, MEASLES
MAKE YOU JUMPY *

* THE MUMPS WILL
MAKE YOU LUMPY *

* THE CHICKEN POX WILL MAKE YOU
JUMP AND TWITCH *

* THE WHOOPING COUGH
WILL COOL YOU *

* THE COMMON COLD
WILL FOOL YOU *

* BUT POISON IVY, LORD,
WILL MAKE YOU ITCH *

* GONNA TAKE AN OCEAN *

* BUM BA BUM BA BA *

* OF CALAMINE LOTION *

* BUM BA BUM BA BA *

* YOU'LL BE SCRATCHING
LIKE A HOUND *

* BUM BA BUM BA BA *

* THE MINUTE YOU START
TO MESS AROUND *

* POISON IVY *

* POISON IVY **

DO YOU SEE THAT,
BILL?

YOU KNOW, I'M A PAN
KIND OF GUY MYSELF.

NOT THAT HAIRY
IN THE HAUNCHES,

BUT THAT COULD BE ME.

WOMEN FLAT-OUT ADORE ME.

NO, THEY DON'T.

BILL, THEY DO.
THEY DO.

GRANTED, I'M MARRIED.

I'M A FAITHFUL
KIND OF GUY.

I'VE BEEN
ALL OVER THE WORLD.

I GET WOMEN,
AND WOMEN GET ME.

THAT IS PATHETIC,
APPLEBY.

TAKE NEW YORK WOMEN,
FOR INSTANCE.

MUCH TOO TOUGH,
TOO HARD FOR YOU.

YOU'RE WAY TOO SWEET
FOR THEM. FORGET THEM.

PARISIAN WOMEN
ON THE OTHER HAND,
VERY SOPHISTICATED.

THEY UNDERSTAND
THE WHOLE WIFE-
MISTRESS THING,

THE NECESSITY OF IT.

I DON'T SPEAK FRENCH.
THEY DON'T SPEAK ENGLISH.

BUT WHO CARES WHAT
THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT?

WHAT ABOUT
ENGLISH WOMEN?

GOOD QUESTION.

YOU'RE PAYING ATTENTION.

ENGLISH WOMEN,
MUCH TOO COOL.

THEY DON'T HAVE LUST.

LUST IS
AN ESSENTIAL INGREDIENT
IN A RELATIONSHIP.

I KNOW THIS FROM EXPERIENCE

BECAUSE MY MARRIAGE HAS
NOT A SPECK OF LUST LEFT,

NOT A BIT.

WILL YOU LOOK AT
THE BUTT ON THIS NYMPH?

BILL, I'M SO LONELY.

BE MY FRIEND. PLEASE,
DON'T LEAVE TOWN AGAIN.

APPLEBY,
I GOT A GREAT IDEA.

LET'S GET DRUNK?

WE DID THAT ALREADY.

LET'S PLAY SOME BALL.

PLAY BALL.

BUT FIRST,

WE GOT TO
GET INTO OUR UNIFORMS.

UNIFORMS.

* ...WHEN YOU'RE SLEEPIN' *

* POISON IVY COMES
A-CREEPIN' ALL AROUND **

YOU KNOW--

WHAT'S THIS?

KATIE.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
"KATIE"?

IT'S HER ASHES.

SHE PUT IN HER WILL
THAT I'M RESPONSIBLE
FOR BURYING HER.

THIS IS WEIRD.

WE'RE RIDING AROUND
IN KATIE'S CAR,

YOU'VE GOT
HER REMAINS IN A JAR,

AND YOU'RE IN
YOUR CARLTON UNIFORM.

AND YOU'RE NOT.

IT'S 2:30 A.M.,
AND MY UNIFORM'S
AT THE DINK'S HOUSE.

[DOG BARKING]

[BANG!]

HELLO,
MRS. APPLEBY.

IT'S ME.
BILLY WYATT.

WHAT?

WHAT THE HELL
IS GOING ON?

HI, MR. APPLEBY.
BILLY WYATT.

WYATT.
WHAT TIME IS IT?

IT'S LATE, SIR.
SORRY.

IT'S 3:00
IN THE GOD DAMN MORNING,

HARDLY A STYLISH HOUR
FOR A SOCIAL VISIT.

HOW'S YOUR MOTHER?

VERY WELL, MA'AM.

YOU'RE WEARING
YOUR CARLTON UNIFORM?

YES, SIR, I AM.

THIS IS
TOTALLY INSANE.

HOW CAN WE HELP YOU?

MA'AM, DO YOU KNOW
WHERE ALAN'S CARLTON
UNIFORM IS?

I BELIEVE IT'S
IN THE HALL CLOSET.

WHAT ARE YOU,
A MANIAC?

LOOKING FOR ALAN'S
UNIFORM IN THE MIDDLE
OF THE NIGHT?

SIR, I'M AS DISGUSTED
WITH MY BEHAVIOR
AS YOU ARE.

ALAN SAID IT WAS OK.

HOW IS ALAN?

HE'S JUST FINE.

WHY DON'T I HELP YOU
FIND THAT UNIFORM?

THANK YOU, MA'AM.

STOP ACTING AS IF
WE'RE AT THE CRICKET CLUB

HAVING FROZEN DAIQUIRIS.

OH, MAN.

I DON'T BELIEVE THIS.

NICE SEEING YOU BOTH.

GOOD NIGHT, MRS. APPLEBY.

GOOD NIGHT,
BILLY.

GOOD NIGHT, DINK.

DINK?

JUST WHAT IS
THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?

OH, NATHAN,
FOR HEAVEN'S SAKES.

PEOPLE HAVE BEEN
CALLING YOU THE DINK

FOR YEARS.

THEY HAVE?

YOU FOUND MY UNIFORM.

I DON'T EVEN
WANT TO KNOW HOW.

PIECE OF CAKE.
LET'S PLAY SOME BALL.

IT'S THE MIDDLE
OF THE NIGHT.

WE NEED
A FIELD WITH LIGHTS.

BILL, BE MY FRIEND.
DON'T MAKE ME DO THIS.

APS,
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.

THIS IS BREAKING
AND ENTERING.

THIS IS
A MAJOR FELONY.

THAT MAY NOT
MATTER TO YOU

BECAUSE I KNOW
YOU'RE DOING THIS
LOST GENERATION,

JACK KEROUAC THING,

BUT IT MATTERS TO ME.

I'VE GOT KIDS.
I CANNOT AFFORD
TO GO TO JAIL.

APPLEBY,
JUST DO IT.

OK.

[CROWD CHEERING]

PLAY BALL!

NOW PITCHING,

38-YEAR-OLD ROOKIE
OUT OF CARLTON ACADEMY,

ALAN "THE HORSE" APPLEBY.

BILLY WYATT,
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

ROOKIE PHENOM FOR
THE PHILADELPHIA PHILS.

WHAT A SHOT!

HA HA HA!

YOU STILL GOT IT, BILL.

NO, I DON'T, APPLEBY.
I'M WAY OUT OF SHAPE.

YOU JUST HIT IT
OUT OF THE PARK.

LOOK WHO WAS PITCHING.

PICK UP THE PACE.
THE POLICE SHOULD
BE HERE ANY SECOND.

APPLEBY, I'M HUNGRY!

ALL RIGHT.
BREAKFAST ON ME
AT BOB'S.

I'VE WANTED TO ASK YOU
SOMETHING FOR A LONG TIME.

ONE MINUTE
YOU'RE PLAYING AA,
ON YOUR WAY UP.

THEN YOU JUST
DROP OUT OF SIGHT.

FORGET IT, APPLEBY.

I'M NOT GOING TO
FORGET IT.

I'VE BEEN WANTING
TO ASK YOU FOR 14 YEARS.

WE'RE NOT LEAVING
THIS DINER UNTIL YOU TELL ME.

WHAT IS IT?

FINE. I'M AT READING.

PHILLIES HUNG
THEIR BRASS UP

TO TAKE A GOOD LOOK
AT ME AND SCHMIDT.

ONE OF US IS
GOING TO THE BIGS.

NINTH INNING,
GUY HITS A LAZY FLY BALL
OUT TO ME IN CENTER.

I DROPPED IT.
WE LOST THE GAME.

EVERYBODY LOOKED AT ME
LIKE I WAS A LOSER,

SO I FIGURED I WAS,
AND I QUIT.

THAT'S IT.

YOU REMEMBER
THE LAST TIME

I WORE THIS UNIFORM?

NO.

THE DAY I STOLE HOME.

TO MAKE THE TRAIN.

THEN MY DAD DIED,
AND I QUIT BASEBALL.

TODAY DOWN IN SEASMOKE,

I REALIZED IT WAS KATIE
WHO GOT ME TO PLAY AGAIN.

WHEN I QUIT IN THE MINORS,

SHE WASN'T AROUND
TO BRING ME BACK.

WHEN I WAS 10, SHE
GAVE ME THIS PENDANT--

A SILVER BASEBALL
ON A CHAIN.

TOLD ME TO WEAR IT
TO REMIND ME THAT
I WAS A BALL PLAYER.

SHE KNEW BETTER
THAN ANYBODY,

ESPECIALLY ME.

WHEN I WASN'T
PLAYING THE GAME,

I WAS LOST.

LET ME TELL YOU
SOMETHING, APS.

IN THE PAST
14 YEARS,

I'VE BEEN ONE LOST
SON OF A BITCH.

THING IS,
IF THAT WERE ME,

SHE'D HAVE FOUND OUT
WHAT TO DO BY NOW

AND WOULD HAVE DONE IT.

DON'T WORRY.
YOU'LL FIGURE IT OUT.

YEAH?

YEAH.

WHERE'S THE PENDANT?

I GAVE IT
TO ROBIN PARKS.

WHY'D YOU DO THAT, BILL?

I LOST MY VIRGINITY
TO HER.

I KNEW IT 20 YEARS AGO!

YOU HAD SEX
WITH MY PROM DATE.

SHE WAS NEVER
YOUR PROM DATE.

HOW WAS SHE?

ARE YOU KIDDING?
SHE WAS HOT.

A LITTLE HOT?
MEDIUM HOT?
EXTREMELY HOT?

EXTREMELY HOT.

WELL, EXTREMELY HOT.
WELL, THAT'S IT.

I'LL JUST KILL MYSELF.

I'M SORRY, APPLEBY.

YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.

ROBIN PARKS
STILL LIVES HERE

IN THE HOUSE
SHE GREW UP IN,

AND SHE'S DIVORCED.

I'VE BEEN BIDING MY TIME,

WAITING FOR THE RIGHT MOMENT
TO LEAVE TRIPPY AND THE KIDS.

BUT NOT ANYMORE
BECAUSE FROM THIS MOMENT ON,

ROBIN PARKS IS
A COMPLETE SLUT!

THERE, I'VE SAID IT,
I'M FREE OF HER.

SHE'S ALL YOURS, BILL.

NICE.

I GOT IT!

I KNOW WHAT TO DO
WITH HER ASHES.

DOWN HERE IS
GRANDFATHER CHANDLER'S POOL.

WHENEVER KATIE
WAS FEELING BAD,

SHE WOULD TOUCH
THE BOTTOM OF THE POOL.

IT MADE HER FEEL BETTER.

IT'S GONE.

GO HOME.
GET SOME SLEEP.

I GOT TO GO TO WORK.

YOU'LL GET IT.

WHAT ABOUT BURYING HER
IN SEASMOKE?

I ALREADY
THOUGHT OF THAT.

IT'S WRONG.

THAT'S WHERE
SHE KILLED HERSELF.

I'LL COME BY LATER.
WE'LL FIGURE IT OUT.

IT'S OK.
I KNOW WHAT TO DO.

HI, HANK.

BILLY.

CAN I TALK TO YOU?

YEAH. COME ON IN.

HANK WAS UPSTAIRS
GETTING GRACE.

I WAS ABOUT TO GIVE
KATIE'S ASHES

BACK TO HER PARENTS,

THE LAST PLACE
SHE WANTED TO GO.

[KATIE]
ALL THEY DID WAS
DRAG THIS POOR HORSE

UP TO THIS PLATFORM
AND PUSH HIM OFF

INTO A TANK OF WATER.

EVERYBODY LAUGHED
AND CLAPPED.

I CRIED.

I THOUGHT
IT WAS MEAN.

LET'S GO!

THAT'S ALL I REALLY
WANT TO DO, BILLY BOY.

I WANT TO LEAP OFF THIS PIER
AND FLY HIGH IN THE AIR

AND HANG OUT WITH THE WIND
AND DRIFT WITH THE CLOUDS.

AND AT NIGHT,
WITH THE SEA WILD,

I'D MEET MY LOVER
HIGH ON A CLIFF,

AND WE'D SWOOP DOWN
INTO THE OCEAN

AND SWIM ALL THE WAY
AND TOUCH THE BOTTOM,

UP THROUGH THE DARK WATER
AND BREAK THE SURFACE,

AND THEN WE'D FLY
TO JAMAICA

FOR PINA COLADAS.

GOD, I WISH
I COULD DO THAT.

HELLO, BILLY.

HI, GRACE.

HOW ARE YOU?

UH...

I KNOW WHAT TO DO
WITH KATIE'S ASHES.

WHAT ABOUT
ST. THOMAS'?

I'M SORRY, GRACE,
BUT ST. THOMAS'
IS WRONG.

KATIE NEVER
WENT TO CHURCH.

I'LL TAKE
CARE OF HER.

TRUST ME.

HANK, I'M LEGALLY
RESPONSIBLE FOR HER.

THANKS.

DOES ROBIN PARKS
LIVE HERE?

YOU MEAN MY MOM?

IS SHE HOME?

I THINK SHE'S UPSTAIRS.

ROBIN?

HI. IT'S ME.

BILLY WYATT.

BILLY. WHAT ARE
YOU DOING HOME?

I CAN'T TELL YOU
RIGHT NOW.

UH, DO YOU
HAVE MY PENDANT?

WHAT PENDANT?

MY BASEBALL PENDANT.

I GAVE IT TO YOU
THAT NIGHT.

REMEMBER?

OH, THAT.

I DON'T KNOW
IF I STILL HAVE IT.

UH, IF I DO,
IT WOULD BE IN HERE.

BUT I'M NOT...SURE.

THIS?

YEAH.

CAN I HAVE IT BACK?

SURE.

YOU LOOK GREAT.

YEAH?

YEAH.

SO DO YOU.

YEAH?

YEAH.

LISTEN, I'M IN SORT
OF A RUSH RIGHT NOW,

BUT CAN I...
CALL YOU SOME TIME?

SURE.

GREAT.

WYATT!

WYATT!

WYATT!

YOU'RE PINCH HITTING.

NOW!

BILLY.

ONE RUN WINS IT.

NOW PINCH HITTING
FOR COSTNER,

NUMBER 9, BILLY WYATT.

OK, BILL!

GO, BILL!

PLAY BALL!

ROBIN, LET ME
ASK YOU SOMETHING.

WHEN WE WERE 16,
DID BILL EVER MENTION

THAT I WANTED
TO TAKE YOU TO THE PROM?

NO, I DON'T THINK SO.

INTERESTING.

GO, BILL!

NICE HIT! GO, BILL!

GREAT! GO! GO! GO!

SAFE!

WAY TO GO, BILL!

ATTA BOY, WYATT.

NOW BATTING FOR THE SPIRITS,

NUMBER 8,
GARRETT FINLEY.

SAFE!

SAFE!
ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT!

ALL RIGHT, BILL!

GREAT GAME, BILL,

JUST GREAT.

I WAS TALKING TO ROBIN
BEFORE YOU STOLE HOME.

SHE SAID
YOU NEVER MENTIONED

THAT I WANTED
TO TAKE HER
TO THE PROM.

I DON'T REMEMBER.

I ASKED HER.
TRUST ME.

I DON'T TRUST YOU,
BILL.

WOO!

* SHE COMES ON LIKE A ROSE *

* DUM DA DUM DA DUM *

* BUT EVERYBODY KNOWS *

* DUM DA DUM DA DUM *

* SHE'LL GET YOU IN DUTCH *

* DUM DA DUM DA DUM *

* WELL, YOU CAN LOOK,
BUT YOU BETTER NOT TOUCH *

* POISON IVY *

* POISON IVY *

* LATE AT NIGHT
WHEN YOU'RE SLEEPIN' *

* POISON IVY COMES
A-CREEPIN' *

* ALL AROUND *

* SHE'S AS PRETTY
AS A DAISY *

* DUM DA DUM DA DUM *

* BUT LOOK OUT, MAN,
SHE'S CRAZY *

* DUM DA DUM DA DUM *

* SHE'LL REALLY DO YOU IN *

* DUM DA DUM DA DUM *

* IF YOU LET HER
GET UNDER YOUR SKIN *

* POISON IVY *

* POISON IVY *

* WELL, LATE AT NIGHT
WHEN YOU'RE SLEEPIN' *

* POISON IVY COMES
A-CREEPIN' *

* ALL AROUND *

* MEASLES MAKE YOU BUMPY *

* THE MUMPS
WILL MAKE YOU LUMPY *

* AND CHICKEN POX WILL
MAKE YOU JUMP AND TWITCH *

WOO!

* THE COMMON COLD
WILL FOOL YOU *

* AND WHOOPING COUGH
CAN COOL YOU *

* BUT POISON IVY LOVE
WILL MAKE YOU *

* POISON IVY LOVE
WILL MAKE YOU *

* POISON IVY LOVE WILL
MAKE YOU ITCH *

* YOU'RE GONNA
NEED AN OCEAN *

* DUM DA DUM DA DUM *

* OF CALAMINE LOTION *

* DUM DA DUM DA DUM *

* YOU'LL BE SCRATCHIN'
LIKE A HOUND *

* DUM DA DUM DA DUM *

* THE MINUTE
YOU START TO MESS AROUND *

* WITH POISON IVY *

* POISON IVY *

* OH, LATE AT NIGHT
WHEN YOU'RE SLEEPIN' *

* POISON IVY COMES
A-CREEPIN' *

* ALL AROUND *

* LATE AT NIGHT
WHEN YOU'RE SLEEPIN' *

* POISON IVY COMES
A-CREEPIN' *

* ALL AROUND *

WOO!

* NA NA NA NA NA *

* OH *

* NA NA NA NA NA NA *

* OH *

* NA NA NA NA NA NA *

* OH *

* NA NA NA NA NA NA *

* OH *

* NA NA NA NA NA NA *

* OH **

CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY
THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING
INSTITUTE, INC.

CAPTIONS COPYRIGHT 1988
WARNER BROS., INC.