Stand-In (1937) - full transcript

Well.

Hasn't anybody got anything to say?

We were waiting to hear
what you had to say, father.

Stop mumbling.
- I said ..

What do you think of Atterbury's survey?

You said nothing of the sort.

If you want my opinion,
I think it's fiddle-faddle.

What do you think, Junior?

I concur with you, grandfather.

You are always right.

No-one is always right.



Will that boy ever grow up?

Wire Ivor Nassau in
Hollywood immediately.

That the house of Pettypacker accepts
his offer of five million dollars ..

For The Colossal Film Company.

Before he recovers consciousness.

And thank Atterbury for his survey.

And tell him of our decision.

I am honored by your invitation
to address my alma mater.

In the past however I've encountered
difficulty in persuading my heroes ..

That the science of mathematics is not
of mere figures and geometrical design.

3 o'clock, Mr Dodd.

One minute past. You are late.

But science is more important
to life than food and drink.

Science ..



That account should have
been out last night.

Without which there could
be no music, no poetry, no art.

This balance, Mr Dodd.

There is an error in the addition.

The total should be 1 million 2 hundred
and 96 thousand, 3 hundred and 21.

The flight of the bird ..
Have the adding machine fixed.

The leap of the salmon.
The rhythm of the dance ..

All are mathematical. Good afternoon.
- Atterbury.

Grandpa.

All of us wish to thank
you for your survey.

It proves my point. It would be
ridiculous to sell Colossal.

But ..

But what?

We .. we have decided
to take Mr Nassau's offer.

Is your grandfather still
in the boardroom?

Yes.

But Atterbury, don't you see ..?

I see a stubborn disregard for my
conclusions, Mr Pettypacker.

But I see more than that.

I see 30,202 stockholders ..

Who don't get the protection
to which they're entitled.

And just how would you
go about helping them?

I'd go to Hollywood.

I'd examine the company's records,
discover the error and correct it.

It sounds simple, Atterbury.

But here we are dealing
with human factors.

In matters of business one is
forced to ignore human factors.

You are smart. But you are young.

I'm old but I'm still pretty smart.

Atterbury.

Do you realize those are real folks you
see acting things out on the screen?

Yeah. It's like this.

One fellow writes a story.

Another fellow directs it.

A lot of different temperaments.

That's the way motion
pictures are made, Atterbury.

I know. I've looked into it.

Two and two make four, Mr Pettypacker.

Whether they be fish,
apples or human beings.

You are a pig-headed
young man, Atterbury.

You mistake confidence with
stubbornness Mr Pettypacker.

Confidence based on mathematics.

A science which has never failed.

And never will fail.

I'll stake my future on it.

Good day, sir.
- Wait.

You stake your future.

We're staking five million dollars.

I beg your pardon, Mr Pettypacker.
You're staking nothing of the sort.

You're selling a 10 million
dollar property for 5 million.

Because it suffers problems.

You are deliberately giving away five
millions of your stockholders' money.

Atterbury, how dare you ..
- Shut up!

Shut up.

In 72 years of banking, Atterbury.

No-one has ever said a
thing like that to me before.

It's your judgement against mine now.

So, you go to Hollywood.

You will be in full charge.

With unlimited authority.

But if you fail.

Don't come back.

I'll go to Hollywood.

Have that vulcanised, Junior.

Yes, grandfather.

Hello spectators. This is Rush Hughes,
your Hollywood photographer.

Hello, hello and hello.

Atterbury Dodd. New York
financial wizard is due in today.

"To doctor the ailing
Colossal Studio but .."

"And this is the low-down.
Colossal is not sick."

"It is dying from slow poison."

"My guess is, it's an inside job
engineered by an outside chiseller."

"With the aid of which fading,
feminine super sexed star?"

"And what cheese director with
a phony foreign accent?"

Phooey.

"Picture. A strange Hollywood .."

I don't like it. Too much talk.

Don't give it a thought, Mr Nasser.
I'll take care of Mr Atterbury Dodd.

And what's the first thing I do?

I break his glasses so he
can't read the books.

Then during the days I put
him on a merry-go-round.

And of an evening Cheri here
can give him the neon treatment.

That is unless the old grey mare
ain't what she used to be.

Potts.

You should play Gone With The Wind.

But for good you should be gone.

Ah, save them cracks for your pictures.

So, you see Mr Nassau by the time
I put Atterbury Dodd through ..

Just a minute, Potts. Do you
know who you are dealing with?

Dodd is the most
brilliant financial brain.

That has been developed in Wall Street
in the last ten years. Why, he is ..

Hey.

The third race is on.

"And here they come down the stretch."

"Boy, what a race. Pom-Pom has
cut the lead down to half a length."

"And there it is, folks.
Almost a photographic finish."

"Lady Ethel is the winner, Pom-Pom
second and Witchcraft third."

"Now in just a moment .."

And this is the point, Potts.

And you too might listen.
I'll tell it as simply as I can.

Who knows, you might get it.

We are trying to put
over a pretty fast deal.

It's conceivable that the sheer
novelty of your drivel may daze him.

For a short time.
- He might bore him to death.

Yeah. But your job is tougher.

Dodd doesn't drink or smoke
and doesn't go with girls.

That don't have to worry Thelma none.

Even without his specs Dodd
can see she ain't no ing?nue.

The whole set up makes me sick.

You're as bad an actress
as often as you're good.

You know this deal means
a great deal to both of us.

Now I get mine the day Colossal
closes. And you get yours.

A five year contract with the
studio that absorbs colossal.

That isn't bad for a star who's
been on a down way for two years.

She will do as I shall say so.

You're the masterful type, huh?

Mr Quintain is outside, Mr Nassau.

I'm not in.

He knows that Miss Cheri
and Mr Koslofski are here.

Well, I ain't here.

Now listen both of you.
And concentrate hard.

Quintain knows more about the
picture business than any of us.

We've fooled them so far because this
is not picture business. It's hijacking.

Ah, the genius of Colossal.

Quintain, glad to see you.
- You're a liar. Nice going, Curly.

Listen, you've a picture to finish
or maybe it slipped your mind?

I cannot shoot without a mandate.
- Don't give me that.

From the start this picture
smelled to heaven.

First, it was writers. Dozens of them.

Then your cameraman.

You shoot five weeks with a guy that's
been photographing you since 1898.

And because he can't squirt the
elixir of youth from his lens ..

You start with a new boy.
- Doug, you know ..

I know you've put a million
bucks extra on the picture.

Naturally, New York got a yen
to know what's the matter.

Well get this. I'm not
taking the slap for it.

You are the producer, aren't you?

He's just your director.
- What have you got to do with this?

Or have you? Say listen, chiseller. If I
felt you had your slimy paws on this ..

Ah, cool off. Pour yourself a drink.

Doug, you don't expect me to
play a love scene I don't feel.

Love scenes the way you feel them?

Look, Camille. They've got censors
or maybe you haven't heard.

Now listen, baby.

Why don't you quit this racket?

You are poison at the box office.

Finish the picture and
give up gracefully.

Koslofski, you directed
a good picture once.

Why don't you prove it was no accident?
- I do not argue with peasants.

So it's like that, eh? Okay.

Get it up off there and
shoot your love scene.

Smell up the joint good
but close the picture.

That's it.

You forget that my contract gives me
a pool of cast, direction, cutting ..

You're telling me about your contract?
I'm the cluck that gave it to you.

Sure. Everybody in Hollywood knows it.

To a dame I was in love with.

And so help me, I'm still in love with.

Doug, please.

Oh Doug. No, you're not
going to start that again.

One drink and you're a lush.
- So what?

You're washed up.

Just a guy who jumped into a gin bottle
and pulled the cork in after him. - Ha!

Alright, go ahead!
Ruin your life. My life.

But this time you bail yourself out.

A charming domestic scene.

Mr Quintain.

You will please do me the courtesy
of not making love to my fianc?e.

In my presence.

Listen, Slug.

I loved your fianc?e long before they
turned over a stone and you crawled out.

Come on, Mac.

May I get your autograph please?
- Yes, my chickadee.

Mickey. Hey, Mickey!

You're a life saver.

Take the body home before
it collapses, will you.

Oh, my feet are killing me.

You don't mind, do you?
You are going my way.

You don't have to stand this, mister.

Oh, Mickey.

Drive on please.

Well, you don't know how grateful I am.

Coming or going?

Arriving.

Are you an actress?

I'm a stand-in for Thelma Cheri.

Pardon my enquiring but
would you mind telling me ..

Who is Thelma Cheri?
And what is a stand-in?

I'd go without pie for a week if
Thelma could hear you say that.

But you do know what
a star is don't you?

Well, vaguely yes.

Why, how you must get around.

Well, Thelma Cheri is a star, and like
most stars she's a pretty fragile type.

She mustn't be fatigued or mussed.

And above all she must never
be so vulgar as to perspire.

Hence the stand-in does
the sweating for her.

I see.

Sorry, but I haven't the faintest
idea what you're talking about.

Look, you wouldn't expect a star
to endure the heat of the lights ..

While they're setting up the
cameras and microphones.

No, I suppose not.
- No.

So they dig up a girl, me, to stand in
for her while all this torture goes on.

Oh, yes?

Then when everything is set
the star, cool and immaculate ..

Puts her dainty little feet
in the chalk marks.

And the stand-in worn and wilted,
fades out of the picture ..

And business goes on as usual.

I see.

Yes.

Hey sonny-boy, who are you
anyway to rate this car?

My name is Dodd. Atterbury Dodd.

Oh, I'm Lester Plum. How do you do.
- How do you do.

Are you in the picture business?

As a matter of fact I'm a kind
of stand-in too, for my bank.

You see I'm out here to take temporary
charge of Colossal Studios.

Mister, with your encyclopaedic
knowledge of the picture business ..

You ought to be terrific.

That certainly rounds out my existence.

Life can hold but one
more moment for me.

Indeed?
- Yeah.

I'm going to make Shirley Temple
president of a bank.

So you're the new boss of Colossal, huh?

Tell me, are you a doer or a don't-er?
- I beg your pardon?

The don't-ers are the
guys that got Hollywood.

They have beaucoup fun
but they don't do much.

It's the doers that wreck the works.
They barge in and fire everybody.

My dear young woman, I am a businessman.

Naturally there are some
aspects peculiar to this business.

It's my plan to find out about them.

Ah, a finder-outer.
Now we're getting someplace.

An orderly mind Miss Plum, does
not attempt to arrive at a total ..

Until it has assimilated a complete
list of the items involved.

Yeah, but most finder-outers get their
lists of items from the screwer-uppers.

The .. screwer-uppers?

Hey Mickey, here is the homestead.

You're a lamb sonny-boy.

But .. don't let them lead
you to the slaughter.

So long.

Hey sonny-boy, wait a minute!

Hey!

We are very proud
of this suite, Mr Dodd.

Two bedrooms. One in orchid,
and the other in pale fudge.

And the bath, a dramatic jungle red.

Tell me, how much does
all this bad taste cost?

Two hundred dollars a day.

But I shouldn't worry.
It is charged to Colossal.

Well Doddsy old son,
sorry I lost you at the station.

Get a load of the space. You can't grab
more if you were a trunk murder victim.

Hey, some hideaway
you got here, you dog.

Make it snappy.
My tongue is hanging out.

Here you are. Charge it to Colossal.

That's the picture
business for you, Doddsy.

Doddsy, the girls here are
up for some sport tonight.

Girls, meet Mr Dodd.
- How do you do.

Hi.

Doddsy here is the first guy I ever met
that never made a crack about my name.

What is your name?
- Potts. And I got a window.

Now look Doddsy, here
is the menu for tonight.

First we attack the Trocadero. Get your
autograph book filled just like that.

Mr Potts.

I appreciate your friends breaking
numerous engagements for me but ..

I'm here on business.

Mr Dodd.

You are Mr Dodd, ain't you?
- Yes.

I read you were coming
here to run Colossal.

And I made up my mind
I was going to see you.

I've been here six months.

And I haven't been able
to get in to a studio.

Elvira, this is Mr Dodd who
can give you a contract.

There's not a child in Hollywood who
can do the things that my Elvira can do.

Now swing it, child.

"Is it true what they say .."

"About Dixie?"

"Does the sun really
shine all the time?"

Elvira sure can go to town, can't she.

Elvira, do that Mae West number.

Don't you think Elvira has done enough?

That's up to you, Mr Dodd.

Now tell me honestly, what do you think?

I will tell you quite honestly, madam.

I think this little girl should be out
in the sunshine playing with her dolls.

Instead of being forced to give
a revolting exhibition like this.

No wonder you can't get in to any of the
studios. Do you know what you're doing?

You are robbing your
daughter of her childhood.

So will you please leave. Or will I have
to send for the juvenile authorities?

Attaboy, Atterbury.

Get it? "Attaboy Atterbury"?

Will you excuse me.
I'm not feeling very well.

Ah .. a shot of bicarb will fix that.

How do you do.
- How do you do, sir.

Could I speak to
Miss Lester Plum please?

Step right in my son and I'll tell her.

Thank you.

Won't you be seated.

Oh, they've decided on somebody else?

Extra work?

But I starred in that
picture in the silent days.

There must be some little part.

Lester is making herself decent.

I see.

Well thanks anyway.

What news from the battlefront, Naomi?

They offered me Extra work.
- Don't take it, Naomi.

Fight it out on this line if it takes
all summer. That's what I'm doing.

And with the battle of Gettysburg
scheduled for a remake ..

They will have to come to me.

And I'm ready for them.

Four score and seven years ago.

Our fathers brought forth
upon this continent.

A new nation.

Conceived in liberty.

And dedicated to the ..

Uh .. to the .. to the ..

Proposition that all men
are created equal.

And now we're engages.

In a great war.

A great civil war.

For seven years I have
waited for this part.

I would have sworn that I was ready.

But now I ..

Four score and seven years
ago, our fathers brought forth ..

Sonny-boy.

Miss Plum.

You forgot this.
- Oh, thank you.

I could have stopped
at the hotel for it.

You would not have found me there.

Come on over and sit down, huh?

Thank you.

Miss Plum. Tell me.

There must be some place a man can live
without being tricked and tormented ..

By people who want to
do his thinking for him.

Not when you're a big-shot.

That's the picture business.

Tommy.

Hello.
- How'd it go, kid?

Oh, I didn't do it.
- Oh.

Gee Lester, it was a tough stunt.

Look, I'll show you.

You see, Blake and me are supposed to be
fencing at the top of the palace steps.

Then he gives it to me.

And they wanted me to do that
for seven and a half bucks.

Can you imagine that?

I don't blame you, Tommy. It's worth
fifteen bucks if it's worth a cent.

But he just did it for nothing.
- I got my pride haven't I?

Besides, that's the picture business.

With that, I feel like kind of a heel
owing the old lady so much back rent.

Gosh, if I was sure I'd crack a couple
of ribs or something I'd have done it.

Eighteen bucks a week in
hospital expenses isn't so bad.

But it would have been just
my luck not even to get hurt.

Miss Plum.

Goodbye.

I'm sorry to have burdened you.

Wait.

If you don't mind sharing the bathtub
with a tame seal, we've a vacancy here.

Here?
- Sure.

It's the last place in the world they
would ever expect to find you.

And if you're on the level about
that finder-outer business ..

These folks here know all the answers.
They're down and out.

But the only difference between
them and the people on top.

Is that the others have jobs now.

Miss Plum. I will send for my things.

And as for that .. trained seal.

I'm sure he can't be half as
obnoxious as a certain Mr Potts.

Precisely what I want.

Are you sure the hams
won't get you down?

Hams, failures and has-beens.

They don't seem to have got
you down, Miss Plum. - Me?

I hid the list of who's through in
Hollywood. Come here and I'll show you.

Oh.

I forget to tell you we're
neighbours. Any objections?

I see no reason why that
should affect the situation.

You're right. It wouldn't.

Here it is.

Let's sit down over here.

Would you think that's me?

No.

Oh. Such is fame.

When that picture was taken
I was getting $4,000 a week.

$4,000 a week?
- Uhuh.

I was the Shirley Temple of my day.

I've heard that name several
times today, Miss Plum.

Who is Miss Temple?

Skip it.
- Well, it's not important.

Tell me, Miss Plum.

What is your present remuneration?

Well if you mean wages, I make
forty dollars a week. When working.

That's entirely wrong, Miss Plum.
- You're telling me.

I mean the ratio of
four thousand to forty.

An inventory taken today ..

Would show that you had the same
assets that you had as a child.

Your mind is mature.

Above average, if I may say so.
- You may.

Please don't interrupt, Miss Plum.
- Okay teach.

Yes.

Physically, you are stronger.

Potentially ..

If you were worth $4,000 a week then
you should be worth $8,000 a week now.

It's simple mathematics.

There must be some element ..
- I'll say there is an element.

Hey .. do you like chocolate?

Chocolate, Miss Plum?

Yes.

Okay then. Maybe Joe
Public likes vanilla.

Vanilla?

Look.

[ Singing ]
"On the good ship lollipop."

"It's a sweet trip to a candy shop."

"When the bob-bons play."

"On the sunny beach at peppermint bay."

"Lemonade stands fill the air."

"Crackerjack bands everywhere."

"And there you are .."

"Happy landing on a chocolate .."

"Bar."

You like it?

It's horrible, Miss Plum.
- Sure.

But when I was small it was awful cute.
- But Miss Plum.

The point is sonny-boy that I now dish
raspberry and Joe Public likes vanilla.

I see.

I'm not squawking because of old age.
I still have my social security number.

Hey.

You'll be needing a secretary and
I've got the answer. Come here.

Look. My night-school diploma.
Read it and gasp.

"Maxima cum laude."

That's Greek for "with highest honors".

I'm afraid that is Latin, Miss Plum.

And as a matter of fact I've
usually had a male secretary.

Well I'll try to keep my voice and
my emotions in a low register.

Lester.

You know the rules of the house.

Mrs Mack, I was about to call you.

I am showing Mister ..

Mister Atterbury the next room.

The rent is twelve a week.

I don't allow cooking in the
rooms, drinking on the premises.

And I expect my guests to be
ladies and gentlemen all the time.

And one more thing. No pets.

Silvernose belongs to my husband.

He's the only trained seal in pictures.

He gets more fan-mail that Clark Gable.

Who ..?
- Skip it.

For the moment, Miss Plum, I thought ..

That's the Admiral.

I told Mr Atterbury about Silvernose.

Yes, I'm sure we won't get
in each other's way, Mrs ..?

Yes.

Excuse me. Could you direct
me to Mr Quintain's office?

Got a pass?
- Why no.

I don't care if you're a tax collector.
Nobody gets through here without a pass.

I see. Is that the usual procedure?

No, this is the usual procedure.

It is a pleasure to see such a
competent man in a position of trust.

Who shall I tell him is calling?
- Mr Dodd.

Mr Atterbury Dodd?
- Yes.

I am so sorry. I should have known.

Why? You've never seen me before.

Sit down, Mr Dodd.
- Mr Quintain.

Before we discuss business.

Let me say I would consider it an
impertinence if you ask me to carouse ..

Drink, or go to parties.

May I ask what prompts this?

Your Mr Potts seems under the impression
that I'm given to riotous living.

I don't want you to make that mistake.

I'm neither a libertine nor a charlatan.

I'm here for one purpose only.

To ascertain why it is that Colossal
is losing money instead of making it.

You may count on my complete
co-operation, Mr Dodd.

Yes, I expect that.
- You must check the books immediately?

Well it seems to me that if I
were to inspect the factory ..

Equip myself with a complete knowledge
of the intricacies of picture making.

I could approach the books
more intelligently tomorrow.

Mr Dodd, I've been in the business
of making pictures for 20 years ..

And there is still several intricacies
that I haven't figured out myself yet.

Look .. I'll give you a rough idea.

See, here is the
administration building.

Fire and police departments, sound
stages, commissary, recording room.

Most interesting, Mr Quintain.

Within these walls, 3,000 units.

Just to manufacture motion pictures.

Units?

Carpenters, electricians, artisans
of all sorts. Cogs in the machine.

They are not cogs and they
are not units, Mr Dodd.

They are people. Human beings.

For purposes of bookkeeping Mr Quintain,
I prefer to regard them as units.

You peddle this joint to Nassau and
your units will be on the dole.

Your logic escapes me.

Well every time an independent
studio becomes important ..

Nassau is the heel who
puts them out of business.

He's a stock juggler.

Makes his money out of closing
studios, not operating them.

That's a very startling piece
of information, Mr Quintain.

He'll buy this joint just like
he did Excelsior and National.

In fifteen minutes it
will be a ghost town.

This way, Mr Dodd.

Alright. We can go in now.

Now hit her on the back
of the head with that spot.

Make it snappy will you. I'm roasting.

Bring up that baby and break
its neck. Kill the junior.

Get in position.

Heads up.

Doddsy old socks! I'm glad to see you.

Come here, I want to get a picture
of you. For publicity, understand.

Right. Here you are, now.
Just point at the dames. Get it?

Why do I point at these young ladies?

Hold it!

Great, because a banker finds
talent in a snow banks. Get it?

Banker. Snow bank?

Come on, kids. Let's go.

Now let's see the blizzard.

Kill it.

Have you seen enough?

Quite.

Well come along.
I'll have you meet Miss Cheri.

Thelma.
- Yeah?

Thelma, this is Mr Atterbury Dodd.
Miss Cheri.

Oh, how do you do, Mr Dodd.

And Mr Koslofski, Mr Dodd.

It's a pleasure.

Quite.

Mr Dodd, won't you sit down.

Thank you.

All lined up, chief.

Excuse me.

I'll catch you outside.

I've arranged a little surprise party in
your honor. I just know you'll love it.

Miss Cheri, I shan't.

I don't like parties. I don't know what
to say to people. I just sit in corners.

And wish I might go home.
- That's exactly how I feel.

But of course, you're in a position
to do as you please, while I ..

I am a slave really.

To the millions of people
who depend on me.

To bring cheer into their drab lives.

Well, excuse me.

Oh, forgive me.

You shouldn't be an executive.
No. No indeed.

Look in that mirror.

You have such fine chiselled features.

All set, Miss Cheri.

Better hurry or your stand-in will fry.

Well, let her fry.

I think I shall insist upon
you for my leading man.

Miss Cheri.

At times I find it hard to differentiate
between facetiousness and sincerity.

But if you are not joking.

My duties here would
prevent any such project.

Even if I could permit myself
to be exhibited in the films.

But stranger things than that
have happened in Hollywood.

Why, even I was a cigarette girl
in a nightclub in Dallas once.

Would you believe that?

Oh yes.

Excuse me.

Has he lost something?

No .. he is looking for camera angles.

What is this?
- Leave it alone.

Edelweiss, Chief.
It's what the script calls for.

Mr Dodd.

You see with your own eyes
what is up against the creator.

Is this edelweiss?

I'm not a botanist but it
looks like edelweiss.

Ah. It looks like edelweiss but
it is not edelweiss. It is paper.

Get real edelweiss.
- But chief ..

We'd have to send to Switzerland.

I'll wait.

What should I do, Mr Quintain?

Well, I think this is something for the
head of the company to decide.

In as much as there is a blizzard
raging during the scene.

Will anyone see the edelweiss?

Mr Dodd. In Russia.

When I make my great passage
from the cradle to the grave.

I had a real cradle and a real grave.

Now they want me to shoot paper flowers.

Thelma, tell him.

I think Mr Dodd is perfectly right.

How easily your trained mind cuts
through the obvious conclusion.

Alright. Let's see your trained mind ..

Cut through and bring this picture
to an obvious conclusion.

Shall we?
- Let us proceed.

Okay, Miss Cheri.

Alright. Roll 'em.

Give me the effect.

Treadmill.

Clouds.

Snow bank.

Freeze.

Hey, Mr Dodd.

Oh, how do you do, Miss Plum.

That's up to you.

Do I get a job or do I have to pin
my faith on the Townsend plan?

It's the last shot in
the picture, you know.

I'll keep you in mind.
- Yeah. I'll see to that.

Hey listen, sonny-boy. Don't let
them take you over the hard jumps.

Huh?

See the thing I was riding on?
It's like a merry-go-round.

It goes like mad and
never gets you anywhere.

I fail to understand.

So did Napoleon. Look
what happened at Waterloo.

The blizzard. Ski!

Oh Miss Plum.
- Quiet!

Paper edelweiss.

Tell me when it's over.

Cut!

Colossal Studio. Good evening.

I'm sorry Miss Cheri. Mr Dodd
is still not accepting any calls.

I will. You are welcome.

Colossal Studio. Good evening.

280,000 dollars for story
costs on Sex And Satan.

Fantastic.

Can you tell me why one story has
to be written to many times?

That's the picture business.

That's the picture business?

Hasn't anybody any answer for stupidity
except "that's the picture business"?

I'm sorry Mr Todd but ..

That's the only answer.

Hey, sonny-boy.

Why, Miss Plum.

You remember me?
The girl you mentioned a job to?

I couldn't get you by phone and you have
not been near the house .. so here I am.

Come in, Miss Plum.
- Thank you.

I'm sorry, sir.

Quite alright, Mr Glover.
Don't apologise.

You can go home now.
And thanks very much.

Thank you, sir.

Miss Plum, close both doors.

My my, you talk like a producer.

But I can scream so you can hear
through more closed doors than this.

Can you?

Oh yes. Have a seat, Miss Plum.

I wish to think aloud.

And I find that I can do so more
efficiently in the form of conversation.

I've made a cursory investigation
and frankly, I'm appalled.

Appalled? Maybe you appal easily?

Koslofski. Real edelweiss.

Thelma Cheri. Eleven writers. Potts.

Mr Dodd, before you trust me too far,
don't you think it would be safer if ..

I were your secretary instead of a
stray you found on your doorstep?

Quite true, Miss Plum.

But I warn you.

I require someone who
cannot be corrupted.

And who will be
absolutely faithful to me.

Sonny-boy, most men like women that
are faithful but who corrupt easily.

Miss Plum.

As employer and employee, I feel that ..

A certain formality in our relationship.

Oh, you mean during business
hours I'm to call you Mr Dodd?

If you will, Miss Plum.

Okay sonny-boy, uh Mr Dodd.

Thank you.

I have a confidential telegram
to get off immediately.

I warn you, accuracy and speed
will be the vital factors ..

Affecting your permanent employment.

Pettypacker and Sons, Wall Street.

New York City.

"Gentlemen."

"Am delaying report re:
financial structure Colossal."

"Until special production."

"Quote: Sex and Satan."

"Unquote."

"Can be viewed and judged."

"As to potential value."

"Stop."

Miss Plum.

Yes, Mr Dodd?

Would you mind sitting over here?
- No. Of course not.

Now, Miss Plum.

Let us assume that you are
dictating and I am the secretary.

You will observe that
I am not doing this.

Nor this.

Nor am I doing .. this.

Instead, I am doing ..

This.

Yes, Mr Dodd?

Yes, Mr Dodd.

Let us start again from
the beginning shall we.

Why should we start at the beginning?

Why don't we pick it
up where we left off?

Miss Plum, this is no time for levity.
- Isn't this what you said?

Pettypacker and Sons,
Wall Street. New York.

Gentlemen. I am delaying report
re: financial structure Colossal.

Until production. Quote:
"Sex and Satan". Unquote.

Can be viewed and judged
as to potential value. Stop.

A truly remarkable feat
of memory, Miss Plum.

Oh, you forget I was a kid star.

Shirley Temple could have memorised that
dull little speech of yours backwards.

Of course, I will take it down shorthand
if you want but you must slow down.

Yeah.

What did I say last?

"Judged as to potential value. Stop."

Exactly.

"The success or failure
of this production."

"Will vitally influence."

"My ultimate decision."

"Re: sale of Colossal to Nassau."

"Stop."

"Happy birthday to you."

"Happy birthday to you."

"Happy birthday dear Grandpa."

"Happy birthday to you."

What's going on?

Happy birthday, father.

What's happy about it?

Now, Fowler.

I say, what's happy about it?

Looks like a forest fire.

If that fellow.

Atterbury Dodd is the cause of
my losing five million dollars.

I will ..

What's that for?

I'm going to get you a hunk of something
you haven't had for days. Fresh air.

I've got the jitters.

There is nothing the
matter with my nerves.

Sonny-boy.

Mr Dodd, I mean.

You forget I work with you daytime and
sleep in the room next to you at night.

And I haven't done much sleeping lately
as you've been doing my treadmill act.

Actually, I am disturbed.

The time for you to be
disturbed is tomorrow ..

When the picture is stuck together and
you get a first horrified look at it.

Miss Plum, this is a crisis.

The savings of 30,000 stockholders.
The integrity of my bank.

And incidentally, my own career.

All hang on the success or
failure of Sex and Satan.

Now do you wonder that ..
- Plenty.

I wonder if you have any
normal male instincts.

Do you mind if we talk
about me for a minute?

No, not at all.

Did you ever notice
anything about my hair?

Your hair, Miss Plum?
- Yes. Feel it.

It's very soft.

And the wave is as natural as
the crease in a flivver fender.

And the color is rich and
real and utterly feminine.

The implication escapes me.

Okay, One strike.

Strike?

Wait.

Look at my eyes.

Do you notice anything?

There doesn't seem to be anything
wrong with them so far as I can see.

If I can rely on the voice of the mob.

My eyes are of unusual depth and color
and they are very large and wide apart.

Many is the extra boy who's been willing
to give up his title for those eyes.

Well?

What you say is no doubt
true, Miss Plum. But ..

Okay .. two strikes.

But you got to toss me one more.

Mr Dodd.

I .. scarcely know how
to approach this but ..

Well I mean .. haven't you noticed
anything about me at all?

Why yes I have, Miss Plum.

I am intrigued by .. your mind.

And I must confess.
- Strike three. I'm out.

I must confess I've studied
your personal appearance.

Quite exhaustively.
- Oh, you've got me there.

Tell me. Did your studies reveal
any faint traces of beauty?

Well, you must be rather
beautiful, Miss Plum.

Otherwise the impulse to observe you
would never have occurred to me.

Oh, you are capable of great
restraint in your admiration.

Dear Miss Plum, this is a business day.
- Alright, so it's a business day.

That means you must stay here and worry
yourself sick? You'll be dead tomorrow.

Meanwhile, you and I will have some fun.
- Miss Plum!

Look. Maybe you're going to fire me for
saying this but I've got to because ..

Well, because I've just got to.

You know your trouble?

You've figures in your blood
instead of red corpuscles.

You're a scratch entry
in the human race.

Goodness gracious.
- I can prove it.

Ever hit a man? - No.
- Ever love a woman? - Never.

Got drunk and thrown out on your ear?
- Certainly not.

Were you ever wicked or
wanted to be wicked? - Never.

Ever had any fun at all?
- I haven't had time.

Well, we're going to
have some fun tonight!

Oh, I'm sorry.

I just couldn't help it.

Miss Plum.

Please don't go away.

Miss Plum.

You've shown me a picture of myself.

That is not pleasant to behold.

I seem to have led an
odd kind existence.

I've been unaware of life
as it went on around me.

But I was contented.

And I didn't want to be
disturbed in my contentment.

I seem to have been
left a long way behind.

Then you'd better start catching up.

I agree.

What are you going to do about it?

In the future I shall not
tether my emotions.

I shall give life an opportunity.

To make me the kind of
person I might have been.

Miss Plum .. do you dance?

Yes, of course.
- Good.

[ Dance music ]

Well, come on.

Don't you know how?
- No.

If you will just do
it by yourself first.

Do you mind if I use a stand-in?

Stop. Stay right there, Miss Plum.

On the fourth beat, your foot was ..

Here.

On the third.

Here.

Oh, you can't learn to
dance by mathematics.

It's rhythm.

Rhythm is based on mathematics,
Miss Plum. Hold it.

Hey, this is Lester.

I won't be home for dinner.

No. And Mrs Mack. Don't hold
dinner for Mr Atterbury either.

No .. goodbye.

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

I wouldn't have believed it if
I'd seen it with my own eyes.

One.

Two.

Where do you plan on going tonight?
- Four.

One.

I've decided to take
your advice, Miss Plum.

Three, four. I'm going out dancing.

One, two. With Miss Cheri.

You'd better take the rug with you.

You, you vacuum you.

Why, Miss Plum.

One, two, three, four.

You tango divinely, Mr Dodd.

Thanks very much.

If only this could go on for ever.

Instead of just a sweet glimpse.

A glimpse of what?

The kind of a glimpse
a girl like me gets ..

When her orbit crosses
the orbit of a man like you.

For one great moment.

I beg your pardon.

Excuse me.

Do you ever dream, Mr Dodd?

Not habitually.

Two, three, four.

Occasionally, when I have something
to eat which disagrees with me.

Four.

You just won't be serious
will you, Mr Dodd.

A tango?

Let's slay them, dearie. With a rumba.

Hey.

I beg your pardon, madame.
You are wanted on the telephone.

Pardon me. I will only be a moment.

And remember. The next dance is mine.

Well, Dodd. How do you like Hollywood?

I've been so busy.

That's the trouble. You big
fellows don't know how to relax.

You try to repair in a day ..

The accumulated damages
of years of bad management.

Now. Take Colossal for instance.

Yes, that is precisely what
I am trying to prevent.

Oh?

That's very good, Dodd.
Now that you mention it.

I know things about that situation
that you do not know.

Exactly.

For example, you know why Colossal
is worth five million dollars to you.

While the Pettypackers consider
it worthless to their stockholders.

You make is sound lie a conspiracy
against the stockholder.

The thought was yours, not mine.

And, Mr Nassau.

If you are contemplating
trying to intimidate ..

Cajole or otherwise ..

Swerve me from my purpose here.
- Listen Dodd, you've got lots to learn.

But you are alright.
Yes, sir. You are alright.

Thank you, Mr Nassau.

But honey, I can't leave.

It's in Dodd's honor.

Alright.

Alright. Pick me up when you're through.
But make it early, will you babe.

Honey, how does the picture look?
- I haven't seen a foot of it.

Well let's not talk about the picture.

I don't want to fight with
you tonight you beautiful ..

Say, how soon do we get
a look at this cheesecake?

I'm piecing it together
as fast as I can.

Take a look at this.
300 feet of Cheri's pan.

It stops the action dead.

But if I cut an inch of it,
she'll get me fired.

Mr Dodd, how do you occupy your leisure?

Miss Cheri, all the excitement, the
romance, the adventure that I want ..

I find in my own way.

Your own way?

Well, if you must know.

In the science of mathematics.

How fascinating.

How dull.

How deadly dull, Mr Dodd.

That's a perfectly normal
reaction, Mr Koslofski.

Because you don't know the
science of mathematics.

It is more important to
life than meat and drink.

Without it there could be no music,
no art, no music, no poetry.

The flight of the bird.

The leap of the salmon.

The rhythm of the ..

The ..

The ..

The flight of the bird.
The leap of the salmon. The ..

The rhythm of the dance.

It's a lie!

Are you calling me maybe crook?

I'm calling you nothing.

But your possession of these articles ..

Requires some explanation.

Now please Mr Dodd, he didn't
know what he was doing.

Consider the incident closed.

Now wait, Mr Dodd. Now please don't go.

Please, for my sake, don't go.
- Doddsy, the party is in your honor.

Don't you think I've been honored
sufficiently for one evening?

Goodnight.

[ Laughter ]

Take the rhythm of the salmon
and the leap of the dance.

You take it, I can't.

Hiya, baby.

Give us some music over there.

One, two, three, four.

And a one, and a two.

What big eyes you got, Miss Cheri.

And a three and a four.

[ Crying sounds ]

[ Crying sounds ]

Miss Plum.

What's the matter, Miss Plum?

Miss Plum, open the door. I insist.

Well, what do you want?

I heard sounds of distress.
- Oh, your eye.

What happened?
- I ..

I fell.

I know. After somebody punched you.

Let's see it.

You look like a bad embalming job.

Who hit you?
- Koslofski.

Did you slug him back?
- No, I ..

What are you anyway? A mouse or a man?

Miss Plum, if a man can't control
himself, how can he control others?

Besides, I ..

Don't know much about
the art of self-defence.

Well, you could have done this.

Why Miss Plum, you're ..

You're wonderful.

I don't see anything wonderful
about it. Just plain Jujitsu.

A trick of leverage.

Leverage?

The principle of Archimedes.
The Greek mathematician.

I don't know about that.

I know it's handy when a guy driving you
home tries to shift gear with your knee.

Miss Plum. Teach me how to do that.

I taught you how to do the
tango and look what happened.

By the way.

How did you make out with
that female Casanova?

Miss Plum, I must insist that you
grant Miss Cheri the respect that ..

The respect to which
she is entitled? Is that it?

Protecting her against me, huh?

And now you want me
to teach you Jujitsu?

If you don't mind, Miss Plum.
- It will be a pleasure.

Oh, you're hurt.
- No, no. No.

Oh, you are hurt.

No, Miss Plum. It is just my eyes.

Unfortunately, without glasses
I suffer from multiple visions.

Now, let me see.

Let me do it to you.

Now let me see. First of all, I ..

I pull this down.

Then I ..

Then I do this.

Then I hold you close.

Closer.
- I beg your pardon?

Closer.

As close as you can.

Oh yes.

Now what shall I do?

Don't you know?

Of course. Now I apply the leverage.

I've mastered it.

Without striking a blow, I can
render a person helpless.

Miss Plum?

Oh, my dear Miss Plum.

You are hurt.

Let me rub it for you.

Where are you hurt?

Not where you're rubbing will
do it any good, sonny-boy.

Oh, Mr Dodd. Lester told us who you are.

About you being the
head of Colossal, that is.

You know, Silvernose's contract
with Monarch expires next week.

He's a buy at three and a half.

Goodbye.

Little.

Jungle Goddess.

Sir Jaffrey.

My beloved.

I see.

Snow.

The edelweiss.

Congo.

He's dead.

But I shall keep our tryst.

St. Moritz.

In.

October.

Miss Plum.

Would you mind telling me
how the picture left you?

Numb .. just numb.

If you want me, I'll ..

I'll be in St. Moritz.

In October.

Mr Dodd.

Since last night I am
filled with remorse.

What a strange thing.

That was social. This is business.

I accept.

Miss Cheri, are you satisfied
with the production?

Well Mr Dodd, an
artist is never satisfied.

There are always little things
that must be done over again.

Then you don't consider
the production finished?

Mr Dodd .. great pictures are not made.

They are remade.

That's the picture business, Mr Dodd.

Mr Quintain.

What would you advise?

It's a turkey.

I'd advise you not to spend another dime
on it. Better to junk it and forget it.

I told these two from the
beginning it was a dud.

You drunken pig.

Mr Dodd.

All through the production,
he was like this ..

I was what?

Thelma. Tell Mr Dodd the
truth of what I am saying.

Well, why don't you answer?

Alright, I will.

It's true.

I begged him all through the production
to stay sober and to help us.

We might have
avoided retakes if .. if ..

Have you anything to say, Mr Quintain?

You heard what the lady said.

Mr Quintain.

Your intoxication at a time
when the success of Colossal ..

Depended on this picture.

Is unpardonable.

You place me in a most
unpleasant position.

But this is so unnecessary.

There is no alternative.

Mr Dodd.

You just took sole charge of a studio.

Oh, Miss Plum.

I recall you knew a method by which we
might gauge the merits of Sex and Satan.

My first guess is, you mean a preview?

An advance showing at which cards
are passed among the spectators.

Upon which they note their reactions.

Sure. Try it on the dog.

If he doesn't bite you, you're in.

Precisely.

You hate me, don't you.

Go on, say it. I deserve it.

I deserve every rotten
thing you can say to me.

But Doug, if you only knew
what staying on top means to me.

I do now.
- I must have been crazy.

But .. seeing everything crack up.

Everything I'd hocked
my soul to get, Doug.

I was afraid.
- You hocked your soul?

Look.

I dragged you from behind a cigarette
tray and put you up on a billboard.

The chump that shoved you down
an unsuspecting public's throat.

Made you a big star in this business.

Until they got wise that your hips were
doing the acting and not your face.

When you thought you were slipping, you
got engaged to that termite Koslofski.

Because you figured he could
do more for you than I could.

Even that didn't cure me.

Koslofski was a bust, so you
came crawling back to me.

Promising me anything if
I gave you another chance.

And I fell for it.

But the whole thing is so
rotten it makes me retch.

But it's not your fault, girly.

It's mine. Yeah, mine.

I put a small-town dame in a spot where
a million fans treated her like royalty.

I made you an applause addict.

I had no right to expect you
to kick over a habit like that.

Doug, please. I can't stand it.

I know exactly how you feel, babe.

For months I've stood still for every
dirty rap you've wanted to hang on me.

Conning myself for what a guy I am.

Ducking a real, honest look at my
kisser until today you made me look.

You know they've got a name for guys who
peddle shopworn merchandise to suckers.

Oh Doug. I won't hear you
say those things about yourself.

Everybody else is saying them.
Why rule me out?

I ought to take poison but it'd give you
too much publicity. I've a better way.

No Doug, no. I'm not worth it.
I've done enough to you already.

You won't get another job
again if you start drinking.

You'll end up in a straitjacket.
- Why not? You can get better that way.

No, Doug. Doug!

What about me?
- You?

Next time, rattle before you strike.

What actor or actress
do you like the most?

The gorilla.

Did you like the story?
- What story?

215 cards and all of them liked the
gorilla more than your girlfriend.

Miss Plum.

The lady to whom you
refer as my "girlfriend".

Is merely a business associate.

When they hissed your business associate
I felt the theater was full of cobras.

Yes, it was a horrible experience.

Well, don't take it too hard, sonny-boy.

Miss Plum.

I am afraid this is the end of Colossal.

Do you mean you are going to sell?
To Nassau?

I see no alternative.

Atterbury, do you know
what you're saying?

Why, Miss Plum.

Your sympathetic attitude proves to me
that you are not only a loyal employee.

You are also ..

If you will permit the liberty.

A close personal friend.

The prospect of humbling myself
before the Pettypackers ..

Why, you egotistical adding machine.

What do I care how you humbled yourself?

I'm thinking of the people who go out
on their ear if you close this studio.

Pop Jones at the commissary.
Miss Cooley up in the wardrobe.

Carpenters, prop men, electricians.

Three thousand people
that you call "units".

Units who have homes and families and
kids and rent to pay and doctor's bills.

Miss Plum, please!
- Go ahead! Sell the studio.

But remember this when you sit at your
new desk in New York emptying ashtrays.

That thousands of people
you threw out of work ..

Will be walking the streets humbling
themselves to the grocer and butcher.

Hungry because of you!

Miss Plum .. you are hysterical.

Sure I am! I am one of those units.
- You are no a unit.

You are different.
- No, I am not different.

And from now on I'm not even a loyal
employee nor a close personal friend.

Miss Plum.

Under the circumstances,
what else can I do?

Nothing. You fired Quintain, the one man
who may have been able to do something.

Hello.

Get me Mr Quintain's residence.

Hello. I want to speak to Mr Quintain.

Oh.

Where can I locate him?

Well, hasn't he some favorite haunt?

Oh.

Mr Quintain.

Him haunting Trocadero for two days.

Thank you.

Oh no you don't.

You ain't getting in here again.

Aside, my friend.

I stand on my constitutional rights.

Go away or you'll be sitting on them.

You know, you are the most
consistently irritating ..

Okay, then. It's a deadlock.

Mr Quintain.

Ah, Mr Dodd.
- I've got to speak to you.

I claim the privilege of
buying you a little drink.

No, really. I've got to speak to you.
- Over a little drink, my friend.

Then I shall be forced
to render you helpless.

Drive on.

Mr Quintain.

Doesn't the fate of 3,000
people mean anything to you?

Only the fate of one people
means anything to me.

She's a little skunk.

Now look here.

Oh, leave me alone.

But Mr Quintain ..
- Sick him, baby. Sick him.

Ah, now that's the first reasonable
argument you've presented.

Feeling better?

Yeah. Lots better.

Ah, but what's the use of talking?

Even if I could fix the picture,
Cheri would have to okay the cutting.

Then I shall deprive her of that power.

Throw away your dream book.

Mr Quintain, there is a clause in
every star player's contract. Quote:

If an artist commits acts that prejudice
the public against the picture industry.

By doing anything which brings her in
to public hatred, contempt or ridicule.

The contract is then breached. Unquote.

So what?

So, I shall involve her in a scandal.

Say, that's not so funny
at that. She'll let you.

I'm sure she will. I've
always had the impression.

That Miss Cheri is
inclined to make advances.

Dodd, you've hit something.

Washing Cheri out of the picture
business is the answer for both of us.

Well .. wish me luck.

Dodd, I've got an angle from these
preview cards. I got a hunch.

I hope my endeavours won't be wasted.

You realize that this makes you a
libertine and a charlatan don't you?

Yes. I am fully aware of that.

And I am quite willing
to make the sacrifice.

Wait a minute. You are not the only
one that's making the sacrifice.

I still love that dame.

I wish I knew why.

Well.

Oh, no.

But Mr Nassau.

This is a question of good faith.

Here, I have called this
special meeting of my board.

I've fought with them.

I've persuaded them to
accept your offer for Colossal.

And now.

I don't know how I'm going to explain
your change in attitude to them.

That's regrettable, Mr Pettypacker.

But I'm in a meeting right
now with my own board.

Your Mr Dodd has destroyed
Colossal's greatest asset.

Miss Cheri.

No. Further negotiations are impossible.

I am sorry, Mr Pettypacker.

Wait, Mr Nassau.

Now suppose I told you that my
board has authorised me to fire Dodd.

Close the payroll and turn
the plant over to you.

Colossal is still a fine
property, Mr Nassau.

And I am talking immediate delivery.

Frankly Mr Pettypacker,
we've made up our minds but ..

Hang on, I'll make one last effort.

The first race.

"Down the stretch, My Oh My
and Kaftan neck and neck."

"Nammy third and
High Life closing fast."

"They are in, and its
a photographic finish."

"What a race."

You win, Mr Pettypacker.

Alright. Our attorneys in
New York can handle that.

You are a lucky man.

So long.

Signed, sealed and delivered.

Oh, I'd love to see Atterbury
Dodd's face round about now.

Me too.

[ Telephone ]

Hello?

Send me a page boy, please.

[ Telephone ]

Hello?

Dodd speaking.
- "I know it's Dodd speaking."

"We've sold out to Nassau."

"You're fired."

Come in.

You sent for me, sir?
- Yes.

Please deliver this not to
Miss Cheri's dressing-room.

Yes, sir.

So you didn't have time to
say it all to her last night?

And it won't keep until
tonight. Is that it?

Miss Plum, I have been dismissed.

Oh, you are breaking my heart.

After four years with
Pettypacker and Sons.

Look .. this is a closing check.

I've been dismissed too along with
3,000 others in case you're interested.

I should break out in a hot sweat
because you lost your job?

You sold out your stockholders and
you crossed up your employees.

I did it for the good of my company.
- What you did was shoot the works.

For what?

Hi, Dodd.

You put up a great battle.
Do you mind if I hear the results?

The office is yours now, Mr Nassau.

I admire your attitude.
And no hard feelings.

You have a lot of virtues I admire.

Have I, Mr Nassau?

Atterbury.

You are a brilliant man.

What difference does it make which
side you're on, as long as you win?

I'll give you a job right
now at $75,000 a year.

Do it with a handshake.

"Sit downers in the steel strike have
defied being ousted them for 48 hours."

"Stay tuned to this station for
further details. We now return you .."

Well, that's more than the
Pettypackers every paid you.

Much more, Mr Nassau.

An even dozen, I think.

Huh?

Oh yes. Well, think it over.

Thank. I will.

Excuse me, Mr Nassau.
- Take as much time as you want to.

I have nothing to do but wait
for the eighth race at Hialeah.

"And here we are now at Hialeah
and it's typical Florida weather."

"Great weather for a great race and that
is just what it promises to be here."

An 18 carat, full-jewelled heel.

How you doing, Rattlebury?

Hello.

A nice day.

You say it's a nice day?
Well I say it ain't.

It's a rotten day for all of us.

I'm sorry.

Dreadfully sorry about your jobs.

Alright, alright. Be the stuffed shirt.

Yeah, rattle home, Rattlebury.

It's the dirtiest double-cross
every pulled on a woman.

You think that's a double-cross?
Here, get a load of a treble cross.

So what?

You know where that
luscious close-up is going?

Right in the can.

And here is what takes its place.

You're cutting me out of the picture.

Not out, baby. Just down to a whisper.

Instead of you chasing Sir Jeffrey,
the gorilla is going to chase you.

And you'd be surprised
how much sense that makes.

Oh Doug, no matter
what I've done to you.

Baby, it will make a picture
out of this cellulite garbage.

And it's the only way to make a good
woman out of a very bad actress.

You've ruined my career!

Alright. I've got another career for
you when you come out of that fog.

Yeah, that will give you a rough idea.

That one is on me.

Sweetheart, I've pulled
a rabbit out of a hat.

All we need to make it a real smasheroo
are a few added shots of the gorilla.

Here. I've made a list of the sets.

You'd better okay them so the
art department can start building.

Mr Quintain.

I have just been dismissed.

You .. fired?

Everyone. The studio
has been sold to Nassau.

How do you like that.

All this work for ..

And when we were that close.

A couple of more days and
we'd have been in the bag.

Mr Quintain.

Assuming you had those 48 hours.

What else would you need?

Nothing except those guys out there.

We got the gorilla on the lot.

Ah but .. what difference does it make?

The difference in the
lives of those people.

Mr Quintain, you can
have those 48 hours.

And that manpower.

Just like that?
- Just like that.

If those gates are locked.

Then Nassau is prevented
from taking over the studio.

You can't do that. He's on the lot.

There are 3,000 other people on this lot
who might resent his presence here.

You're talking about twenty years in
the can. That's unlawful possession.

But Colossal must be
saved for those people.

Hey.

Whatever became of that Atterbury Dodd
who used to call the guys "units" and ..

Cogs in a machine.

Well .. I must admit to a certain
modification of viewpoint.

And a twenty year rap doesn't matter?

It seems to me that the only
thing that really matters.

Is that a man be true to himself.

I mean for instance.

If it's an essential part of his nature
to be clean .. then he should be.

If he dislikes chicanery he
must be straightforward.

Not for hope of reward or fear
of punishment but because ..

That's the kind of a man he is.

It's not a question of who's
right or who's wrong.

It is simply a question ..

Of what is inside a person.

Does that make any sense to you?

How much did he offer you?

$75,000.

How did you guess?

Sweetheart, I'll split that twenty
years with you. Move over.

But don't forget, that in Hollywood when
you turn the other cheek, they kick it.

Mr Quintain.

Would you mind very much ..

If I called you by your first name?

I'd like nothing better.

Thank you, Douglas.

Carry on, Joan of Arc.

Stop. We've got to stop them.

Gentlemen!

Fellow workers.

Fellow workers.

I must talk to you.

You've got to listen to me.

I must talk to you.

Stop!

Out of the way, white-collar.

I command you. Stop!

Now you've got to listen to me.

I don't mind being a target
if you'll just listen to me.

Hey, you look like a Spanish omelette!

Wait a minute, wait a minute.
Let him talk.

Make it fast and make it good.

Slip them the history of the rhythm of
the salmon and leap of the dance.

I was discharged this morning too.

Wait a minute. Pipe down.
Give him a change to talk.

Tell 'em the one about mathematics being
more important to than meat and drink.

Anyone else want to listen?

Alright, Dodd.

You regard me as your enemy, don't you.

I'm capital and you're labor.
That's the way you see it, isn't it.

Well, it isn't as simple as all that.

Let me tell you who
our stockholders are.

Don't fall for it, suckers.
It's bank night.

Is there anyone here who
owns any Colossal stock?

I have a few shares.
- Come here.

Here you are, men.
There is your capitalist.

And there is a street-car
conductor in Denver.

A bricklayer in Chicago,
a soldier's widow in Memphis.

30,000 of them.

Their savings built this plant.

And what's happening now?

A small group of financial tricksters ..

Headed by Ivor Nassau
is trying to close it.

Well the stockholders can't
afford to see it closed.

Any more than we can.

There is no trouble here that
a good picture won't cure.

Mr Quintain tells me
that we can have a ..

Smasheroo in Sex and Satan
if we only finish it.

We can expose Nassau.

We can save the studio and our jobs.

So, I'm asking you for 48 hours work.

I have no money to
pay for those 48 hours.

But I pledge you my word ..

I can't give you anything but love ..

Quiet. Quiet!

I now I am doing this very badly, but ..

Won't you please try and understand.

Because it is vitally
important to us all.

Do as I ask and I pledge you my word.

That I will convince the stockholders ..

That we are entitled to an interest in
this business that we have saved.

Let's not sit down.

Let's stand up and fight.

Yeah, but can we hold on?

Nassau will have the law on us.

Of course he will.

But there's 3,000 of us.

We won't let the law in.

Ah, skip the speeches and let's go home.

Mr Quintain needs
carpenters, electricians ..

All of us, including
the gorilla, for 48 hours.

What do you say, gentlemen?

What do you say, juicers?

Hey!

I own the gorilla. The gorilla says yes.

We'll show them a real fight.
- Fight on, fight on!

Mr Potts.

In my youth I learned an axiom.

That a straight line is the shortest
distance between two points.

I must have slipped.

Thank you. Thank you, gentlemen.

Excuse me just one moment.

[ Radio: ]

"At the half, Cream Puff and Hoola Girl
neck and neck. Boy, what a race."

"Coming down the stretch now.
Cream Puff in the lead."

"Look at that Cream Puff.
It's Cream Puff by two lengths."

"Hoola Girl second and
Sidewinder third."

"Stand by. I'll have the prices
for you in a moment."

Mr Nassau.

You offered me a position.

Sure. Dodd. I think you're intelligent.

I need intelligent men
in my organisation.

That's a deliberate falsehood,
Mr Nassau. You think I'm stupid.

Too stupid to know that this is a bribe.
- A bribe? For what?

To prevent my dissolving
this sale, Mr Nassau.

And to avoid an investigation at which I
intend to charge you with conspiracy.

Why you ..
- If you please, sir.

What's this, Dodd?

Archimedes law of leverage, Mr Nassau.

Colloquially known as Jujitsu.

Gentlemen.

I give you .. Ivor Nassau.

It was me that threw that tomato at you.

I'm awfully sorry.

Don't mention it.

Dodd, my friend.

Congratulations.

Have you another tomato?

Oh, sure.

Thank you.

A bulls-eye.

Yes, indeed.

Oh, Mr Dodd. You were wonderful.

Thank you, Miss Plum.

Miss Plum, take a telegram.

"Messrs Pettypacker and Sons.
Wall Street. New York City."

"This will advise you that for
failure to deliver to buyer."

"You still own this business."

"Have checked all items."

"Carefully."

Miss Plum.

If you please.

Miss Plum.

Will you marry me?

What, no build-up?

That's the picture business.

Well.

Where were we, Miss Plum?

Have checked all items .. carefully.

Yes .. carefully.

Stop.

Enormous profits are ..

In the bag.

For Colossal this year.

Hello? Send a truck to
Mr Koslofski's residence ..

To pick up various furnishings
belonging to the property department.

Mr Quintain, please.

Douglas?

We are now in business.

Hey honey, if you could
cook I'd marry you.

Precisely.

"Will outline plans for
future operations."

"When we meet at the .."

"Investigation which I
propose to demand."

"On behalf of the stockholders."

Why, Miss Plum.

You.

I am sure we are going to be very happy.

Miss Plum.

# s d #