Spanish Judges (2000) - full transcript

The stranger Jack arrives in the studio of the crook collector of antiques Max and tells his ambitious companion and specialist in poisons Jamie that he is Jack's brother. Jamie does not buy his story, dominates Jack and ties him up to a chair. When Max arrives, Jack proposes US$ 100,000.00 for each one to protect him in a negotiation of the antiques "Spanish Judges" with a wealthy and dangerous collector. Max invites his stupid acquaintance Piece, who comes with his retarded girlfriend that believes she is from Mars, to compose the backup team. However, Jack double-crosses the collector and then he intrigues Jack, Jamie and Piece.

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Let's go.

Yeah, yeah.

What do
you say, len?

Can we just
get out of here
and go home?

Let's go home.

How you doing, Lenny?


Bobby: See,
here's the deal.

Hand over the judges
to me right now.

I'll see what I can do
about saving your life.

Who's gonna save
ass, bro?





Hi there.


I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. I just--
I'm sorry.

Who are you? How
did you get in here?
How did you get in?

The front door--
I came in. I came
through the door.

Are you a cop?

Do I look
like a cop?

Answer the question.

M-Max gave me
a key. I'm his


It's nice
to meet you.


Ok, I'm sorry.

I completely
all right?

All right?

Jeez. Ooh.

You guys have got
a great place.

It is. This place,
it's great,

really nice...

this stuff here.

Which one of you
is the collector?

Because this stuff
looks like it
could be in a museum.

Ok, I'm cooperating.

Max doesn't have
a brother, asshole.

We're not
that close,
that's all.

Shut up.

Uh! You know,
I really wish you
wouldn't do that.

Shut the fuck up.


Where is your gun?

I don't have a gun.
But you have
very soft hands.


Ok, look, now you're
starting to piss
me off, all right?

I don't want
to hurt you.

I didn't come here
to Rob from you,
steal any of your

what did you have in mind?

I'm Max's brother.

Ok, now
I'm pissed off!

Max's brother wouldn't
be carrying a little
thing like that.

I don't have
a complex about the
size of my knife.

Maybe you should.
Max has a knife.
He has a very big knife.

I remember
the size of
my brother's knife.

You're Jaime, huh?

He met you
in New Orleans,

the summer
he was doing
long hauls.

It was 5 years ago,
wasn't it?
5 years ago.

He said you
were crazy. You know
what? He was right?

Max said that?

Yeah, he did.

When did you see him last?

A long time ago.

The last time I
saw him was the day
he left home.

And that--i was 16.
That was 9 years
ago, a long time.

And when did he
give you the key?

He mailed it to me.


I understand
he's been working

the collection business
the past couple years.

Yeah. So?

I might have
a job for him.

What is it?

A job.

Quick, easy.

Make some real cash.

What's real cash?

I'll wait
until my brother
gets home.

That's a good idea.

We're gonna
get along
just fine, Jaime.

I have a good
feeling about this.

Me, too, Jack.
I have goose pimples.

Ladies and gentlemen,

the next item we have
up for bid is lot number 54,

an original 17th-century
German presentation broadsword

with highly polished
straight double-edged
34-inch blade.

I will open the bidding
at 5,000. Do I hear $5,000?

Let me hear 5. I want to
hear 5. I want to hear 5.
Let's have 5. I have 5.

Now I want to hear 6...

Max, that's your stuff.

You need that
right in your house.
Why, I'd take that woman.

Lord have mercy.

Stud in the belly
and all. Goddamn.

Ha ha.


Max, you know what I bought
here last week, man?

A moose's head,

a fucking moose's head.

damn near 300 pounds.

Ha ha! But you know

My wife loves it.

Because they stole it
from coppola's house,

and coppola is her
all-time favorite director.

Ha ha! Shit.

Love, right?

That's what it is.

95 going once, twice,
3 times.

To the gentleman right here,
number 77--front table.

Thank you.

Well, 20,000 bucks
and a moose's head,

and she loves
my ass forever.

But I haven't seen you
buy nothing yet today.

You ain't going cheap
on us or something?

You used to be
the fiercest one
in this whole place,

always down there
in the front row.

Now your ass is hanging
back here with all
these damn cheapskates.

Now, I can't remember
the last time I seen
your hand raised.

Max, you ain't going
cheap on us, man?

Work with me, Max.'re not broke,
are you, Max?

Oh, goddamn.

Ha ha!

Oh, shit.

You broke!

Hey, you need a job.

Hey, Mr. Tutu,
come over here.

Give him a size,
what? Large.

And the hat
to go with it.

That's a damn shame, Max--

a grown man ain't got
a pot to piss in or
one to throw it out of.

Jack: I'm gonna have this thing
fixed up in a jiff.


Thank you.

He's going
to kill me.

I'm telling you,
he's going to be
very happy to see me.

I haven't seen him
in a long time.

I'm talking
about the chair.

Why? This thing is
not worth anything.

Don't tell me.
You work
at sotheby's?

No, I don't. But I do know
fine things when I see them.

You want a drink?

Yes. Please.

You know, I'll have
whatever you're having.

Good choice.

Thank you.

So, what do you do?

I mean, do you
work with Max?

Yup, yup. Max and I
work together. So what?

You're so defensive.

So what?

There you go.
Look at that, huh?

Good as new.

I am good.

So this, is this
your collection?

That? No.
That's Max's stuff.

I collect
other kind of shit.

What other kind of
shit do you collect?

You know, the usual.


Barbie dolls, you know,
baseball cards.


Ingestible poisons.

That's cute.

Oh. Come on. Here.


That's much better.


Thank you.



You don't trust me, Jack.

I don't know you,

Oh, let me see it.


How does it feel?
Are your hands
getting numb?

Ok, are you feeling numb?

Here, here.
How many fingers am i--

how many fingers
am I holding?

That's all right.
Don't worry.
I'll just watch you.

It's ok. It's ok.
Relax. Enjoy.

Be careful with that
because you're going...

Well, always
next time, huh,
maxie boy?

Always next time.

Wait. I tell you what.
Hold on.

If you help me load
this stuff in this trunk,

maybe I'll give you one
of these candlesticks,

huh, help light
your way back home,
plus $2.00 or $3.00.

Because, you know,
ain't no romance in
a goddamned pot, man.

Ha ha! Motherfucker's


I'm sorry, Jack.

Maybe you are
Max's brother.

Maybe you aren't.

But I can't
afford to fuck
around, you know.

What did you do to me?


star of Bethlehem.

It's just
50 milligrams,

so it shouldn't
last too long.

Don't do that.

I feel like shit.

Don't move too much,

I would rather
you didn't do that.

You know,
I learned this

while I was doing
juvie time
at tryon...

And I can
never get enough
practice, so...

How do I look?

You know,
nothing like Max,
but not too bad.

Man: Max,
are you in there?

Don't wander off.

Max! Max!

Max! Max!

Shut up. What?
Hi, piece.

Is Max not back yet?

No, he's not
back yet.

Come on.


You not gonna do,
"piece, come in"?

Piece, come in.

What was that?

Hi, baby.

God, I hate this place.

What is it?

It gives me the creeps.

It's just--i worry
about you, and it's so--
it's all this shit.

I'm helpless.
I'm a woman.

What did you want me
to do? What is it?

What did you
come back for?

Wellings--he rooked us.

You mean,
you screwed up.

No, I didn't screw up.

I went and I did a pickup
for Max at wellings'.

But he rooked us--
2 grand short, 2 grand!

Max sent you on
a job by yourself?


What? I--

I'm doing things by
myself all the time.
What is this?

I got

Remember last week?

You remember when
I went for the
movie guy's face?

Remember that?
Whose idea
was that?

That was my idea,
taking the face
instead of the body,

because, you know,
he's a movie guy.

That was me--face--
all me--face.

And because of that,
Max gives you wellings?

I mean, how--what did
the fucker buy anyway?

He bought
v.C.R.S, tvs.

The same thing
he always buys--
v.C.R.S and tvs

could I have a--ahem--
could I have
a bucket, please?

Who are you?

No! No! Piece!

Who are you? Who are you?!

He's Max's brother.

I'm Max's brother.

Piece, hold it.

Max's brother.

I'm Max's brother.

Max's brother.

Why you got Max's brother
tied to a chair for?

Because he
probably isn't
Max's brother.

Whatever! What
is it that you
need, piece?

What is it?

Wellings, wellings.
What are we gonna do?
He rooked us.

We? This is
your screwup,

Why didn't you
count the money

when he
gave it to you?

I didn't think
I had to, all right?

I mean, we've been working
with this guy

5, 6--i don't know
how many months.

I trusted him.

you're a crook.

What are you
doing trusting

You--that's it.
That is it. That's--

I got in the mess
because I trusted

You know, that envelope
was right on the table

in front of us
the whole time
we were sitting there.

Why--i mean, you
could have counted that.

You could have counted--

why didn't you count
the money? I mean--

I couldn't do it.
It would have been
impolite, you know.

Now I look like
an idiot in front
of Max's friend.

Jaime: Brother.


God. The point is that--

I don't know
what the point is.

You stupid--you're stupid.
You're a stupid bitch.

Where are you going?

To get my money.

Yo, did I tell you
to come with me?

You stay here.

You ain't coming with me.

Jaime: You call him a cheat,
and he'll shoot you dead.

Piece: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Come here, baby.

Come here, hmm?

Oh, that's Jack, honey,

or, at least, that's what
we're calling him for now.

Who are you?

You mean, right now?

She's from
another planet, Jack.

Do you want to talk to her?

Do you want to hear stories

about meteors and comets
and little green men?

Of course, it doesn't
make her any more
full of shit than you are.

Baby, why don't you
go and get Angie?

I'll go get Angie now.

I'm from Mars.

Martians know
all your secrets.

Psst. Get in there.

What is that all about?

Ask piece.
She's his.

He picked her up
awhile ago

when we were living
in New Orleans.

She was trying
to sell

magnolia blossoms
to the people.


What are you doing?
What did I tell you?


That's ok.

Anyway, you know,
she was trying to
sell these flowers

and she had
the idea all wrong,

so she was actually
paying people

to take
the things from her.

When we're getting
ready to leave town,

piece decides
to bring her along.

I don't know.
I guess it makes him
feel important,

you know,
to have a human pet.

I hope it makes him
feel good about himself.

It ain't doing
shit for her. She was
better off on the street.

You know, being
owned is better than
starving to death.


It's a pity
you don't look
anything alike.

I always
hoped Max had
an identical twin,

with his face

and someone
else's head.

♪ Hands are small

♪ and she only has
one head ♪

♪ and some hair

Jaime, Max is crazy.

I don't know what
he's going to do

if he comes home and finds
his only brother
tied to a chair.


The shit I
get talked into.


If I don't get a cashew nut,
I'm gonna puke! Jaime!


we're moving on.

You close up
your deals.

Don't take on
any more.

We are no longer
residents of this
stinkhole city.

I have not
had a pleasant stay

in the city of Los Angeles.

I have not had
a profitable stay in
the city of Los Angeles.

But that's ok. That's ok,

I've learned something.

And when I'm learning something,

nobody can say
that I'm moving assways.

You know what I learned?

I learned you can't get back
respect once you've lost it.

Do you remember when we
first came to this city?

People would see me
and they would say,

"that man has had some success.

"That man has success
written all over him.

That is a successful man."

And they all treated me

you know, nice comments
about my shoes, my clothes,

valet parking--yay.

And now, a couple of bad--

a few weeks,
a couple of lousy bad months,

and what do I get?!

I get 10 tuxedoless freaks
with serving trays

and not one goddamned nut
in the whole place!

Here, baby.




Don't you give me any lip
about moving again either.

We're gonna have
a fresh start...

Maybe Chicago or Detroit,
somewhere new,

that I can be treated

like a...
Like a successful man.

You want to be
a successful man, Max?

Where did you come from?

I've been sitting
right here the whole time.

New boyfriend,
sister Mary Agnes?

He says he's
your brother--Jack.

My brother.

Nice to see you
again, bro...

Particularly since
we've never seen
each other before,

particularly since
I don't have a brother,

and since I never
have had a brother.

I could be considered

I find it
very interesting.

Why don't you
explain it to me?

I'm not his brother,

after all.

I should
have just shot you.

Why don't you?

Was it Jack?


Is it Jack?

Jack, if that's
your real name...

It's as good as any.

So, what do we do now, Jack?

What do you want to do?

I was sent here by
a friend of yours--

Bernie Nick.
Bernie Nick!

Yeah, I know Bernie.

So, how do I know
you know him?

He's the one
that told me

the story
about New Orleans
and the long hauls.

Right? I had it
right, Jaime. Didn't
I have it right?

Max: So what?
Bernie is a dick.
I don't trust him.

I know.
And neither do I.

If I had to,
I would
have used him,

but instead,
I want to use you.

Use us for what?

I have
a proposition,

a little

a collection

It's a big take,
very minimum risk.

How big? How minimum?

It's $1 million
in cash.

What do you think?

And how much of the money
comes our way?

I was thinking
about 5%.

How about 10%--
$100,000 each,
$100,000 a head.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah what?
We don't even know
what we're doing.

You want
the long version or
the short version?

Give me the short version.

I need protection.

Give me
the long version.

All right, all right,
all right!

The long version.
8 months ago
in San Francisco,

my friends and I
were hired to obtain
some merchandise--

a set of
very rare antiques

from the court of
king Charles iv
of Spain.

They were known
as the Spanish judges.

The guy
was willing to pay
very well for them.

No questions,
all of that.

He showed us the house
the merchandise was in.

We spent nearly
2 weeks getting
our plan together.

But when we finally
moved in,

another group of
hired thieves had beaten
us to the punch.

The Spanish judges
were gone.

They disappeared
earlier that night.

Like I said, the pieces
were in demand.

My associate and I went
back to our employer
with the bad news.

He was furious.

He took it out on
my best friend's skull.

They beat him within
an inch of his life.

And once it was over,

he hired us
right back again.

He just couldn't
let go

of the idea of
having the judges
all to himself.

You follow?

Max: Sure.

Sure, sure.

He sent you and your crooks
to rub out the other crooks

for a better price.

6 months and 5 cities

until we finally
found them.

They had been holed up
in this little motel
right outside of Tucson.

We confronted them.
We didn't really know
what we were doing.

And then one of them
just started shooting,

and all hell
broke loose.

I watched all my companions
get gunned down one by one,

including my best friend.

Excuse me.

But when
I searched the car,

it almost
seemed worth it...

Because there in
all their glory were
the Spanish judges.

Well, it's a crying shame.

I mean, you got this
bright and shiny merchandise

and nobody to share it with.

Max, what i'm
telling you is I
need your help here.

See, and you
can make a really
smart choice

and make a lot of
money really quickly
and really easily,

or you can
just let go
of the damn rope

and drop me
off the edge.
But you know what?

I really wish
you'd make up
your mind, ok?

Because I'm wet
and I'm cold,

and to tell you
the truth...

I'm not too fond
of the view.

Jaime, I don't know
what you're thinking.

I don't know what the fuck
you think you're thinking.

What? Huh?

Blah, blah,

Stop whining.
We're taking
the offer.

Why? Because you said so?


You make the decisions?
No, no, no.
I make the decisions.

You need the money, Max.

Shut the fuck up!

Yes. We need
the money.

"We need the money."
"We need the money."

Well, you're sounding
like a wife.

We can't say no,
and you know it.
We can't say no.

This is not what we do.
We are not bodyguards.

We are crooks.

We don't even know if he
has a decent plan yet.

Jack, what's
your plan?

We're set to meet
tonight at midnight

at a warehouse
over on Hartford.

I got the merchandise.
I've got a rented Van.

All I need is backup in case
they try something stupid.

All I need you to do is
watch my sorry ass, Max.

His sorry ass.
We can do that.

We can watch
his sorry ass.

We can
do that.

Between you
and piece
and me,

we can




Wellings may
have shot him,

2 hours ago.


When were you
going to tell me that?

It just didn't
come up.

Is he dead or alive?

You know
I mean--

don't even try--don't
even think about doing
this without piece.

No, right?

No. I'm not
going to go deal
with wellings.

I'm not.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. No.

You're sorry

I've done
my research on both of you.

You're both
very capable people, right,

but in all due respect,
when it comes to guns,

neither one of you can hit
the broadside of a barn.

It was very nice meeting
both of you,

but I'm gonna take
my business elsewhere.

Thank you.

Sit the fuck down.
Sit the fuck down!

You know what?
I'm going to sit down.

We'll be
right back.

I'm sitting.

What do you want to do?
You want to go
to wellings'.

Are you crazy?

to go to wellings',
smart ass.



Because we need
the fucking money,

that's why.

Ok, ok, ok, ok.

What are we going
to do about him?

I don't want to
him to go around to
hire someone else.

I'm not gonna let
some stranger roam
around in my stuff.

I'm not coming with you,
risk getting my ass shot.

Jack: Aw. Come on.

Man: Come on in here.

Don't be shy. It's nice
to see the both of you.

Max: Good evening,

How you doing tonight?

I see you're cooking
up a little dinner
for yourself there.

A friend of mine
mixed this up
for me.

I don't know
what it is.

I don't know
what it does.

But I can't wait
to find out.

You should let me mix up
something for you sometime.

Oh, no.

I know everything
about you,
spider lady.

Not quite everything.

Piece: Hey.

How you doing,

Fine. And you?

Good, thanks. Piece,
you can do things on
your own, can't you?

You can handle
things by yourself.

Max: You guys finished?




Well, I'm glad to see you
didn't rush to judgment

on our little friend

What did he say to you?

He called me
a cheat...

Piece: That's right.

Said I
rooked him.

Well, you
rook him.

So I made
a mistake.


I ain't got to hear
about it from
the likes of you.

People like you
whatever they get.

Ok, let's talk
through this, wellings.

Let's talk about money.

Saw you looking.

Look at that--
it's 9:00.

It's 9:00 on the nose.
Come on.

Well, didn't Max tell you
to untie me at 9:00?

Isn't that what he said,
"9:00, untie him"?



But he didn't say
you couldn't untie me
at 9:00, did he?

Yes, he did.

Max: So,

what are you gonna--
what are you
gonna charge us

for our friend hanging
from the ceiling there?

5 grand.

5 grand. That's fine.
That's good. 5 grand.

I'll tell you what,

Jaime and I tomorrow
will bring you

$3,000 worth
of merchandise, ok?

$3,000 of equipment,
whatever you need.

That plus the mistaken 2
comes to 5.

And we're even.

Then rude boy...

Piece: Twit!

Can just stay here
and spend the night
with me.

We'll have
some fun.

Why, you motherfucking
lucky son of a bitch...

Shut the fuck up!

I'm gonna kick your ass
in half!

I know. It's funny.

I have $3,000 here. I do.

Here's 3,000, you see?

This is a marker for you.

I'm gonna give it
to Jaime.

And Jaime, she's gonna
put it in an envelope
and seal it,

give it back to you...

You see?

You hold onto that
tonight as a marker,

and tomorrow, I'm gonna
bring the $3,000 worth
of merchandise

and give it to you

and, of course, you'll give
me back the envelope.

But he goes now.


Ok, so, I assume
there's a key.

Right, ok.

Piece, is this yours?


Bring me
some tuners...

I need
some good tuners.

I've heard
a lot about you.

About me?

Oh, yeah, sure.

Everybody's heard
about the girl from Mars.

It's in
all the newspapers,

and I can tell you

my friends are gonna
be very jealous when I
tell them that I met you.

Oh, how jealous they'll be.



Every man in America
wants to meet

a girl from Mars...

Especially one with

beautiful, beautiful eyes
like you have.

No, no.

I don't want
an American man.

I want
a man from Mars.

All right. Hey, look,
what's your name?

Come on, really.
What's your name?

I can't say.

I'm not gonna tell
Max or Jaime or anything.

Look, cross my heart
and hope to die.


Ok, I'll tell you what,
how about I call you--

I'll call you, uh,
Mars girl.

You like that, don't you?

I'll tell you what,
Mars girl,

you want to meet
Mars boys?

You got to go
way back to Mars.

And to get back to Mars,
you're gonna need
a lot of money,

so why don't you
come over here right now
and reach into my pocket?

Come here, Mars girl,
reach in my pocket.

What are you laughing at?
Come here and reach
into my pocket.



I don't need money
to get to Mars.

Someone will come
for me.

They will, huh?


Someday, a beautiful
stranger will come

and take me
back to where
I really belong,

and then I'll be
truly happy.

But maybe i'm
the beautiful stranger.


Men where I
come from...

Don't have scars.

It was a goddamn
good fight in there.

Jaime: Very slick talking
in there, brother pio.

Very slick hands,
sister Mary Agnes.

Thank you.

I knew it
was coming, and I
didn't even see it.

What did you
put in there?

Coupons from radio shack,
you know.

Here. Where did you find
$3,000 in cash?

Jack's wallet.

Who carries that kind of
money around with them
anyway, huh?

Successful people, baby.

Jaime, what we do
back there we did well.

We should stick
with what we do well.

What we did
back there is

not going to make us
$100,000 each, baby.


I don't think--


I got a bad feeling
about this guy.

Something's gonna go wrong.

Yeah, it's gonna be
too easy, ok?

Come on, piece,
let's go.

I'm gonna go
to piece's

He's gonna pick
out for me,

a nice gown
for tonight.

You go home. Get
the mannequins

We'll be there
in, you know...

What for?

A few minutes.
Come on...

What for?

Get out. Get out.

Come on.
Get in the car.

Ah, just
get going.

Why?! Why?!
Because you say so, huh?

Because you say so?

Fine, fine.

I've got
a hole in my wrist.

You're lucky it's not
around your neck.

Help me out here.

What are you doing?

Another one of
Jaime's stupid ideas--

dress the mannequins up,
put them in the car,

park it in front of
the warehouse, and when
these people see it--

then they think
that you've got
an army of backup.

It's a genius idea.

I know.

Maybe I'm talking
to the wrong person.

I mean, I just
naturally figured

that you were
in charge, but...

Oh, I'm sorry.

I am on your team.

I just don't know

why everyone else
doesn't feel that
way around here.

Are you talking
about Jaime?

the whole thing.


Well, she used to.

You know, what bothers me
about you people, Max?

I haven't seen
a single gun since
I've been here,

unless you're talking

Hey, hey, hey, hey!

First of all,
don't go snooping around
and touching my things.

Secondly, they're not guns.

They're antiques...

French flintlocks.

It's my
newest addition.


That is nice.

Old dueling pistols.

They come
in a boxed set.

Yeah? Yeah?

I don't have
all the literature
on them yet.

I've only had them
a month or so.
But eventually--

where are they from?

See the tag?
It says "laroche."

That's French--

What's it mean--

It doesn't
mean anything. It's
a town in France.


Quite grim,
aren't they?


Guns make me nervous.

Never carried one.

Us either.

If you need a gun,
you're doing
something wrong.

That's why
piece has so many.

He does
everything wrong.

Collecting is about
Patience, Jack...

Unless you've got
a lot of money--

you can put
all your collection
together at once.

See this burgonet here?

15th century.

It's part of
a complete
set of armor

made by
the missaglia family
of Milano.

I only have
the helmet
right now,

but I know a guy who
has the pauldrons.

When I get it
all together...

You know,
bit by bit,
that's ok.

I have what I have,
and what I have
makes me happy.

I have what I have,
and what I have
makes me happy.

It's beautiful.
It really is.

I know.

But so is a new caddy,

so is new furniture.

So, why do you have
a cabinet full of antiques?

Why does your guy
want the Spanish
judges, hmm?

For the beauty?

For an investment?


Antiques are not
about money, Jack.

They're not even
about the beauty.

They're about ownership.

They're about

They're about...

They're about

"I have the power
to reach back
into the past

and grab
anything I want,
make it mine."

An antique can say
that. A new caddy
can never say that.

Oh, I understand
that completely.

You think a lot
about that, though,

about being
a successful man,

about being treated
the way you deserve
to be treated.

I'll get there.

You'll see.




Or maybe...

Maybe Chicago
after that.

Here's to Texas

the year
after that, huh?

We have chosen a very
tough business, Max.

It's hard enough
to go at it alone,

and then you've got
all these dependents.
It's just--

that's my problem.

If I was an independent
operator again, you know,
I'd get it like that.

Like that.



What does she know
about being successful?

Do you know what she has
in the closet back there?

You're talking about
the poisons, right?


With a job like ours,
a hobby like that.

And don't think it
makes for comfortable
living arrangements.

Every time
we get in a fight,

I have to stay up
all night

and listen for
the closet door to open.

That ain't right.

It's selfish
is what it is.

The bitch.



Yeah. You said something.

What did you say?


My life is such a mess.

Hello, gentlemen.


Is he getting funny
with the mannequins

Are you?

I'm gonna be up
on the roof.

At 11:15,
come get me.

All right.

You know...

Yeah, this better be
on the level, right?

I mean, like,
it better be, like,

like everything you say.

Don't worry
about it, piece.


Girl, girl.


Looking for you, huh?

I missed you.

Piece, why don't you
go and get some sleep?

We've got to get going
in a couple of hours.

I want to go
over the plan

It's all right. We'll
have plenty of time
when you get back.

Come on. Wha...

Come on.

All right.
Let's go.


Plane for Tahiti. Vroom!

That looks good
on you...

The gun.

You know
how to use it?

I've used it
a couple of times.

But Max just won't
allow it in the house.


Because, uh, when
we fight, we fight.

Oh, yeah?

Did he hit you?

No. You did it.
You did that.


It doesn't hurt,

It doesn't hurt?


Is this a challenge?

Where you going?

Hey, you know, you seem
to be in a much better mood

than when I first met you.

You brought
some excitement
into my life, Jack.

Glad to hear it.


Jamie, why'd Max
go up on the roof?

Uh, he goes there
to think, you know?

Max likes
to have everything
thought out in advance.

That's why tonight
makes him so nervous.

Yeah? What, um...

What makes you


He's a very bad boy, Jack,
a very bad boy...

A very jealous boy.

You wouldn't want him,
you know, jumping
to conclusions here.

Well, Max
is on the roof.

What Max
doesn't know
won't hurt him.

All right.

Well, what else
makes you nervous?

Not much.

I like surprises.

That's why Max and I
are so unhealthy

because he's
a control freak,

and I'm just
not that kind of girl.

I can see that.

Why do you stay?
You can find better.

I'm looking
for something else.

I can see that.

But you just
don't walk away
from a man like Max.

He's very determined.

Of course,
I'm at your service.

Do you really know
what you're getting into?

Oh, yeah.

No, not really.
I don't.

Unh! Jesus Christ.

I know what you want.

Oh, you do?

Oh, no. Not again.



You're going to learn
to love it.


Jack, uh, wanted
to wash up.

How about
napping with me
for a few minutes?

It's time to go.

All right.
Go on upstairs.

Wait for us.
We'll be back soon.

No, you cannot
come with us.


She'll be quiet.

She will.
She'll be quiet.

You know, you drive
really fucking slow
for a bad guy.

Are you sure you want
to get out of the Van
by yourself?

No, but that's
what I told them I'd do.

I don't want to do
something stupid

and scare them
into something...
Really stupid.

Watch me
in the rearview mirror,
and if you see something--

I know. I signal piece,
he starts shooting.

I know.

Right. Hey, piece...

Try to miss me,
all right?

Don't worry, Jack.
I never miss.

Oh, that's great.

That's really great.

Hee hee hee!


A gun. Uh, can I borrow
a gun for this?

I told you,
I don't carry guns.

That's great. That's
great protection i'm
getting for my money.

How are you doing,

If everything's ok,
you signal, correct?

Then you come out
with the boxes.


Ok. Hold this.

Oh, shit!

Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.

You bastard! Aah!

All right, all right.

He's got a gun!



He's got a gun!

It's all right,
girl girl.

You get on over
in the corner.

Go! Come on!

All right. It's all right.
I got him. I got him.

Piece: Go into the corner.


Max: Piece!

Go, go, go, go, go!

Goddamn you, backwards!

Get the fucking money, now!

That's it, that's it,
that's it.

Max: Well,
go get it!

I'm going, going!

Jamie: What the hell
are you guys doing?!

I've almost got it!

Down, down, down, down!


Come on!

Come on!
Come on!

Come on!


You ok? You ok?



Pow! Pow!

It's ok. It's ok.
She's ok.


She's all right.
She thought
it was funny.

That's great.

Will you take
this thing off?
Take it off.

People can see you.

If we get pulled over,
it's your fucking fault.

Ah! I can't get it.

It's got, uh, those--
those code things.

Ok. Let's go.

What are you

Uh, hairs in the carpet
and stuff.

Ok. Gloves?

Everybody had
their gloves on, yes?

Nobody touched anything
without their gloves?

Is that correct?


Shit. I didn't
even think
about it.

You...are a problem.

What are we going to
do about this?

Torch the Van.

Torch the Van.


No. We're not going
to torch the Van.

You and I are going
to come back here
tomorrow morning.

We'll get rid of this.

Nobody will find it
before then.

Good. Can we go now?

Come on.
You ready?

Don't worry, Jack.
I'll protect you.

Protect me
from what?

Is anything else
going to go wrong?



You can tell me now.
What happened in there?

Look, what you saw
is what went on.

What? I didn't see
anything. I didn't
see a damn thing.

Jack said
somebody pulled
a gun on him.

He said hit him,
so I hit him.

Max, is that true?

Jack: I can't get
the case open!

I can open it
with my X-ray

Jamie: It doesn't
make any sense.

Why didn't they wait
for Jack to get away
from the Van first?

Just shut the fuck up
for a while.

You make so much noise.

What about you, Max?
You were supposed to
be the lookout.

The lookout!
You were supposed
to be watching!

Why did Jack have to
see the fucking gun?

You were supposed
to be watching.

You're really starting
to piss me off.

Ok. You know
what we need?

We need, like, a rock, ok?
Or an electric drill.

Does anyone have a drill?
Something, anything.

Oh, fine.
You know what I'll do?
I'll just go ask my super.

You know why? Because he's
probably the only one
in this goddamn city

that doesn't know
what we did yet.

Jamie: You're being
a prick, Max.

Mars girl: I can open it
with my X-ray vision.

You're always being
a prick!

You know, I'm thinking
that I think

that you're not
thinking who you're
talking to here!

Sure I do.
I'm talking to a prick.

All right.
That's it. Come on.
Come here, you!

Get back
in the fucking car!

You get out of the way!


Ok, ok, ok.

You will not hurt
Jamie again.

Max: What? What did I do?

Jack: No, no!
That's enough!
Now, listen to me.

We've got the case.

Nobody's hurt.
These are good things.

We need to focus right now
on getting the thing open.

Does anyone have an idea
on how to open the case?

I can open it
with my X-ray vision.

Oh, girl.
You shut the fuck up!

Hey, enough already.

I got an electric drill
at home.

There you go. Drill.
Drill at home. Let's go.

Max: I'll drop you off.

You'll drop me off?

Yeah. Yeah. We'll wait
at the apartment.

You can fucking walk.

You ok, baby?



Good. Yeah. That way,
we'll walk back.
There's a 7-Eleven.

Maybe we could get some
watermelon popsicles
or something.

Piece, we want to do
this tonight, ok?

You leave the girl
with us, you go,

pick up
the fucking drill,
and come back home.

Enough already.

Ok? Let's go. Come on.

No. I have
your solemn word

that you
will protect
these women...

If I leave them
over there.

Yes, you have
my word.

Yeah, yeah.
I'm "whatever" now.

Ok. Get in the car, please.
Get in the car.

Jamie: Oh, that's what
you're so upset about.

You wet your pants.
You could have said so.

Could we just all
shut up for a while
until piece comes back?

I can open it
with my X-ray vision.

Get rid of her.
Get her out of here.

I am sorely tempted
to tear her fucking
tongue out.

Come on.
Let's go
to my room, baby.

Bye, Jack.

Night, Mars girl.

What? I didn't do

I didn't do

I am going to kill her.


That white-faced,
Lily-livered, jong-loving,
hot-blooded whore

talk to me like that.

I can talk plenty.
Did you hear the stuff
that she was saying?

Were you
a witness to that?

I said yeah.
I am not some hoodlum!

I am not some lowlife scum

that hangs around
the street-corner store.


What's a guy
going to do, huh?
I run a pretty tight ship,

and that's truth
under the circumstances

of having more dependents
than god, I might add.
You'd think--


I'm trying to put
this kid to sleep!

Then try harder!

Jack, is he boring you?
Do you want a break?


No, no. There's
not going to be
any teaming up on me

in my household,
thank you!

Did she tell you
that she was
in prison?

She mentioned it, yeah.

Yeah, but did she
tell you why?

No. She told you?

Yeah, but she
made me promise
I can't tell you.

I can't tell you.

Yeah. Uh-huh, Jack.
What'd she do?

I...ok. I just
think that under
the circumstances,

this is something
you should know.

Right. What'd she do?

She killed
her parents.

Shh! All right.
Stop, stop, stop.

She told you that?

Yeah, yeah.
She said that, yeah.

She's 10 years old,
she gets taken out
of the school play

because she's not
doing her homework,

so little Jamie
steals of jar
of formaldehyde.

Next thing you know,

her parents
are drinking it.

Her own parents.

It's a wretched,
fucking thing.

The hand
that's feeding her--
chopping it the fuck off,

but that's exactly
what I thought!
That's exactly--

fuck, I was right
all along!
About what?

I mean,
that's exactly it!

She goes after
the people that
take care of her.

Right, right.
But she wants
to be taken care of.

I mean,
that's the clincher.

People that she can
rely on, like me--


You know,
she seeks us out.

And the minute
she's feeling, like,
a little fenced in

or something better
comes along--

oh, I got it.



I thought
you should know, Max.

Max: I could
wrestle her to the ground
and choke her to death!

I could tear her to bits!

Do it, Max. Do it.

Go in there and take
care of business
right now. Come on.


No. It wouldn't work.
She doesn't wrestle
to the ground easy.

You know, I'd have to
take out my gun,
shoot her...

Hmm. Yeah.

Wake up the neighbors.

I thought you told piece
you were going to
protect the women.

I lied.

I like to lie.

It makes me feel
all tingly inside.

It makes me really want
to kick your ass.

And you know what else?

You know, with all
this excitement,

I forgot I wanted
to kill you, too.


In the warehouse,

your guy did not
pull a gun, Jack.

You didn't see

You know what I did see?

When he got back up,
he went like this.

Now, you want to tell me
how his gun got back
in his holster? Hmm?

This whole thing would
have gone down clean

if you hadn't bent it
out of shape, Jack.

You want to explain
why it is you did that?

I have my reasons.

Yeah? They better be good.

Yeah. I have
reasons that don't
concern you--

look, I will shoot you
through the head.

Ah, ah, ah, ah.
You don't want

to wake up
the neighbors, huh?

Oh, shit!

Are you
all right?
Oh, you little shit!

Is he here for me?

Calm down, Max.

What the hell
is going on in there?!


You know, it's
like having a mother
in the house, you know?

You know, I just
want to kill
so many people.

This whole thing
is getting...

Way too complicated.

Yeah. Well,
you know what?
Just worry about Jamie.

As far as the events
in the warehouse
are concerned,

you gave
your protection.
You know what, Max?

You're going to get
what's coming to you.

Anything outside of that
is my business.

Leave it alone.

Think so, huh?
Yeah, I think so.

Let me ask you
a little question, Max.

Why didn't we wait
for piece? Why didn't we
just pick up piece?

You got a dead body
you hadn't planned for.

You got dirty prints all
over an abandoned Van.

You got 2 eyewitnesses.
The only face they see
is piece's, huh?

It wouldn't be
that you and Jamie

are planning
a little deviation
of your own, would it?

That's none
of your business.


Piece will be here
anytime now.

So are we going
to do this,
or aren't we?



I'm going to go
and get something ready.

As long as he's with you,

he's leading these guys
back to your front door.

Leave him behind,
the cops arrest him,
and he's going to talk.

It's the only thing
you can do, Max.

I know.

Plus, now you get
another share.

Of course, you could
have all 3 shares...

If you wanted.

Yes, I could. Yes.

I'm just saying...

If you think that she's
going to do to you

what she did
to her own parents...


No, she's not going
to do that to me.

Should I go get her?


Jamie, showtime.

Ok. Are you--
are you sure
you want to do this?

Someone has got to suffer.

Yeah, but piece?
He stood up for you

when Max
would have knocked
your teeth out.

What's your point, baby?

Well, are you sure
you're doing
the right guy?

Hmm? Yeah.
Come on, come on,
come on, come on.

Just think about it,
all right?

Hurry. Go.
Go, go, go, go, go.


We were just talking
about you, piece.

Jamie! Piece is here!


Got the drill.


Wonderful. Anything
strange happen
on the way here?


No. Where's
girl girl?

Jamie: Sleeping. But, uh,
anyone follow you or...


What's going on?

Max: Nothing.

Try and open
the case?

Yeah. Where do i--

right there.

Are you guys as excited
as I am? Yeah?

Jamie: Yeah.

Watch my stuff!

Watch my stuff!

Max: No! No guns!

I don't know
where you live,

but gunshots
are reported
in my neighborhood.

Guys, thanks
for the help.

Well, we did it.

All right. Let's
get this body
out of here

till we're ready
to dump it.

Dead bodies.
I don't like
looking at them.

But, uh, the girl
is sleeping
in the bedroom.

Then we'll just--
we'll throw him
in the bathtub.

All right?

Well, come on
and grab his feet.

Jack: Get the door.

Jamie: Shh.
You'll wake her.

You know, Jack?


We were talking
about that guy

that you set us up
to kill tonight
for no reason.

I remember
the conversation.

Yeah. I think
I figured out the reason.

You want to hear it?

It's probably
not what you're
thinking, Max.

I think those boxes
of yours are empty.
I think...

That there are
no Spanish judges.

I think...

This was a setup
from the beginning.

You know,
a little shooting,

and, uh, you get
paid for something
you never even had.

Oh, that's pretty--
pretty slick, Jack.

get paid, Max.

As soon as you get
that case open,
we get paid.


I'm beginning to think
I'm getting rooked again.

I mean, nothing
has gone straight
in this deal so far.

He looks comfortable.

Here. Let me do this.

There's money
in that case.

The guy trusted me

Well, then he deserves
what he got.

Come on.

Come on.

Tell her to hurry up,

Jack, will you tell him
to back off? I'm trying
to concentrate.

What, the 2 of you
can't talk to each
other? Come on.

You got something
to say to me, just
turn around and say it.

Just stop pushing me, ok?!

You're being such a baby
about opening this thing!

Maybe if you paid attention
to what's been going on,
you'd be worried, too.

Or maybe it's just you
just don't care anymore.

Maybe you just want
the whole case for yourself.

Maybe you're thinking
about formaldehyde.

I don't know what
the fuck you're
talking about now.

the 2 of you--

you know what? This
is just like you.

You get so--
I mean, you get

these paranoid
fucking delusions
about anything

that is not
under your control.

And you're jealous
of Jack

because he's
a successful man.

And he's got
a big plan,

and you've got
a little tiny plan,

and his case
is going to be
full of money,

and if you just
give me one fucking
undisturbed moment

to open it--

No. It--

open--uh, open it.

Open the case.

Ok. Um...



Don't touch it.
Let's just look at it
for a few seconds.

a million

That is
a million

How much do you think
is there?

It's a million
fucking dollars.

A lot.

How many of these
do we get? Huh? 15 each.

Thank you, piece!
Thank you.

It's all there.

Oh, my god, baby!

I can't believe it.
You stupid bitch!

We finally did something!
We finally did something!

We finally did!
We finally did!

Ha ha ha!



Jack: Oh, my god.
I can't even count this high.

Ha ha ha!


What the fuck is this?

We got a lot of work
still to do.

Max, Jamie,
come on. Get up!

Max, you should
let Jamie get on top...

Because that's how it was
when she was fucking me!

Hmm. Sorry.

Aah! Aah!



Shoot him! Oh!

I told you,
no shooting
in the apartment!

He's the one shooting!

Give me my money!

Max! Aah!

Piece: Ah, you...


See this?
You see this?
This is a dead body!

That thing before--

that wasn't dead.
This is dead.

Don't blame this on me!


Don't blame you?
You poisoned him.

Poison was
not my idea.

We couldn't have shots
in our apartment!
That was the whole idea!

Your apartment!

I no longer have
anything to do
with you,

with this place,
or any of this!

This time,
it's fuck you.

This is the end.
The end.

Jack: We have to leave
right now.

Right now, we have to go.
What do you want to do
with this, Max?

Fuck you, too. Fine.

Max, leave it.

Forget about her.
Leave it or go. What
do you want to do?


We'll let the police
take care of it. Let
them earn their money.

I'll get something.


Is he here for me?

Go back to sleep!

Why did you
tell him? Why?

What the hell
did you do?

did. I just said it.

Now, you want to spend
the rest of your life
with this guy or not?

Make up your mind.
Let's go.

He's loading
piece's body
into the car.

Are we going
to do this?

Uh, are you
going to help me?

Right? Come on.

Pour 3 martinis.

3 martinis. 3.

Jack: Mmm, mmm, mmm.

a fucking liar, Jack.

I don't know
what about, exactly,
but I know you are.

Why should I trust you?

Jamie, this whole thing
between you and Max

was set in motion way
before I ever met you.

I don't know if the part
I like about you is even
the real part.

I want you
to come with me
to San Francisco.

Why would I lie
to you about that?
What do I have to gain?

We can introduce
ourselves to each other
all over again, ok?

2 very nice,
very rich people

that never have to get
involved in crime
ever again, ok?


Then we'll see
what happens.

Ok. I'm going to go
and finish packing.

Make sure that he gets
the right one.

It's this one, ok?
This one. Ok?

What about this, Max?

Whose share is this
going to come out of?

It's her or me, right?

Never trust anything
that bleeds for 5 days
and doesn't die, right?

Jamie, come on.
We got to go. Let's go.

Let's have
our drinks,
then, huh?

All right. A toast.
To 3 very clever people.

May we--may we all get
what we deserve.

I loved you once,
sister Mary Agnes.

I loved you, too,
brother pio.

Wait. Stop.

Aah! Aah!

Jack, did you
switch glasses?

Oh, it hurts!

Well, we'd better go.

What did she mean
about switching

I don't know.

Dying people say
some pretty stupid shit.


Drink up, Max.
Let's go. We got to
get out of here.

I don't think so.

What was this?

Getting the money
is not enough?


Nothing is enough
for people like you?


Jack: Ow.


Come on. Come on,
you big fucking
piece of shit, huh?


Oh, you're garbage.

You're fucking garbage.

And you fucking smell
like garbage!

Come on.

That's ok. That's ok.

Get off my money!

You piece of shit.

I should have smelled you
a mile away.

I got played.

I got played!

I murdered sister Mary.

Jack: Why don't you get
away from her now, huh?

You're not
good enough for her.

Get off her!

Piece of shit.
You killed her.

And you're going to
walk away

with a lot of money
for it, aren't you?

Yeah. The money

But it's nothing compared
to the Spanish judges.

You have them?

No, Max.

You did.

You want
to see that, huh?

Huh? Want to see that?
Come on. Get over here.
Get over here.

You see that? Made
by Jean-Baptiste laroche

in the galleries
of the louvre.

It was going
to be a present
for king Louis xv of France

to king Charles iv of Spain.

What does this say?
Look at that.

"Les juges"...
I can't speak French.

But they sure are pretty,
aren't they? Huh?

Circa 1760.

Supposedly, Max,
these are one
of the finest sets

of dueling pistols
ever made.

Now, personally,
I don't like guns,

but I do know fine things
when I see them.

Mmm, mmm, mmm.

The little story
I told you about--

remember the gentleman
in the motel parking lot?

Well, he'd sold
the guns by the time
we met with him,

sold them
on the black market,

and then he'd
sold them again
and again and again...

For a fraction
of their worth.

One million dollars.
Oh, my god.

Hidden this entire time

in a graveyard
of a fucking apartment.

What a joke, Max.

How many
pretty sister Marys
you have to kill

for a million bucks, huh?

Max: You think
you know

who I am, Jack?

You haven't even
met me yet.



When you were
showing me
the pistols...

You only loaded
one of them.

Do you remember
which one it was?



There's only one way
to find out.


This is a 200-year-old
gun, Jack.

I wonder what this gun
would do to you.

Think it'd kill you

Or maybe it would
just wound you, hmm?

I could watch you bleed
and squirm all night,

like you've been doing
to Jamie and I.

You fuck.

You fu--
you fucking cheap whore.

Get down on your knees!

Get down
on your fucking knees!

You beg Jamie
to forgive you. Beg her!

Mars girl: Fly! Fly!


Nothing, honey.

Excuse me, Max.

Come on.

Is he here
for me?

No, he's not here.
I got to tell you
something, all right?

Listen to me, honey.
Come with me, all right?

I can't leave you here.
You know too much.

As soon as we get
outside of the city,
I'll let you go.

I'll even give you
some money, all right?

Go anywhere you want.
Come on.

No, thank you.
I have to wait here
for the man from Mars.

I'm the man from Mars.
Hey, I couldn't
tell you before,

because they would
all have gotten
very jealous,

but I'm that guy.
Come with me.
You're not, though.

because I got scars?
Everyone's got scars.

No. They know what to do
so their scars
all heal up,

but yours just keep on
getting worse.

There's no man
from Mars.

He's not coming.
The only people that
are coming are the cops,

and you can't be here.
You know too much.

So tell me
you're going to come
with me, all right?


Come on.
Give me a big hug. Yeah.

Please don't
make me do something
shitty here, ok?

So tell me
you'll come with me.


I will do this,
I swear. Please?

Tell me you'll come
with me.

Let go of me.

Open up! Police!

Open the door!

Police! Open the door now!