See You in the Morning (1989) Movie Script

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY

WARNER BROS., INC.

♪ WHEN I FALL IN LOVE ♪

♪ IT WILL BE FOREVER ♪

♪ OR I'LL NEVER FALL IN LOVE ♪

♪ IN A RESTLESS WORLD ♪

♪ LIKE THIS IS ♪

♪ LOVE IS ENDED

BEFORE IT'S BEGUN ♪

♪ AND TOO MANY

MOONLIGHT KISSES ♪

♪ SEEM TO COOL

IN THE WARMTH OF THE SUN ♪

♪ WHEN I GIVE MY HEART ♪

♪ IT WILL BE COMPLETELY ♪

♪ OR I'LL NEVER

GIVE MY HEART ♪

♪ AND THE MOMENT ♪

♪ I CAN FEEL THAT ♪

♪ YOU FEEL THAT WAY, TOO ♪

♪ IS WHEN I FALL IN LOVE ♪

♪ WITH YOU... ♪

AND THE BIG RUNNING

OF THE LIVINGSTONE

FAMILY CUP RACE!

AND THERE THEY GO!

WOO!

WHERE'S MINE?

OH, NO!

NO, NO! LOOK,

DADDY'S IS STUCK.

OH, NO!

COME ON, PEPSI!

WHAT'S HAPPENING

TO YOU?

OH! OH! OH!

♪ AND THE MOMENT ♪

♪ I CAN FEEL THAT ♪

♪ YOU FEEL THAT WAY, TOO ♪

♪ IS WHEN I FALL IN LOVE ♪

♪ WITH YOU ♪♪

ALL RIGHT, TIME'S UP.

I WISH EVERY DAY

WAS A HOLIDAY.

THEN YOU WOULDN'T

APPRECIATE IT.

OH, MOMMY, THERE'D BE

JUST MORE TO APPRECIATE.

YOU'RE NOT SETTING

A VERY GOOD E-X-A--

M-P-L-E.

RIGHT.

YOU TAUGHT THEM

HOW TO SPELL, NEENIE.

"WE WENT TO A SECRET PLACE

BENEATH THE PIER."

WHAT DO YOU THINK

THEY FOUND?

A SUBMARINE?

A TIME MACHINE.

YOU WORRY TOO MUCH,

MOMMY.

BACK TO THE DINOSAURS.

THAT'S TOMORROW'S STORY.

GOOD NIGHT,

MY SWEET GIRL.

GOOD NIGHT,

MY BILLY BOY.

YOU STAY UP

TOO LATE, NEENIE.

I'M TELLING YOUR DOCTOR.

NIGHT.

NIGHT, BILLY BOY.

GOOD NIGHT, DADDY.

♪ SEE YOU

IN THE MORNING ♪

♪ SEE YOU IN THE EVENING ♪

♪ SEE YOU

IN THE SUMMERTIME ♪

♪ DOO DOO DOO

DOO DOO DOO ♪♪

YOU ALL RIGHT?

WE HAVE TO

HAVE A TALK.

WHAT ABOUT?

US.

US?

OK, HERE WE ARE.

GO AHEAD, PETEY.

SHOW GEORGE

HIS NEW HOME.

WHAT ROOM DO THEY

WANT THIS THING IN?

OK, TIME FOR BED.

IT'S BEEN A LONG DAY.

CAN WE PLAY

ONE HIDE-AND-GO-SEEK GAME?

TWO MINUTES.

OK.

WHO'S HIDING?

WE ARE.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5,

6, 7, 8, 9, 10.

OK, HERE I COME.

ANYONE AROUND

MY BASE IS "IT."

[LAUGHTER]

I GOT YOU!

NO FAIR!

THERE'S A SECRET PANEL

IN THIS ROOM. HERE.

HMM? HERE, HERE,

HERE, HERE,

HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE.

LOOK AT THIS.

A FAMILY JUST LIKE US

WELCOMED IN

THE NEW CENTURY

IN THIS VERY ROOM.

I BET THERE ARE GHOSTS

IN THIS HOUSE.

IF THERE ARE,

THEY'RE COZY, FRIENDLY GHOSTS

WHO WILL WATCH OVER US.

WHY?

BECAUSE WE LOVE

THEIR HOUSE.

MOM, WILL WE LIVE

IN THIS HOUSE FOREVER?

MAYBE YOUR DADDY

AND I WILL.

YOU AND PETEY WILL GO

AND GET MARRIED

AND HAVE

YOUR OWN HOUSES.

WE'LL ALWAYS COME BACK

FOR THANKSGIVING

AND CHRISTMAS.

AND YOU'LL BRING

YOUR CHILDREN.

AND WE'LL

INTRODUCE THEM

TO ALL

THE FRIENDLY GHOSTS.

AND EVERYBODY

AND EVERY SPIRIT

IN THIS HOUSE

WILL BE HAPPY.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO

IF I COULD NEVER

GIVE ANOTHER CONCERT?

THAT'S NOT

GOING TO HAPPEN.

YOUR HAND'S GETTING

BETTER ALL THE TIME.

THAT'S NOT AN ANSWER

TO MY QUESTION.

[BEEPING]

[BEEPING STOPS]

HAPPY WEDDING DAY,

MY LOVE.

[PIANO PLAYING]

[MUSIC BECOMING

DISCORDANT]

[CROWD MURMURS]

I CAN'T BELIEVE

HE DID IT.

WE SPOKE TO HIM

LAST NIGHT, YOU KNOW.

HE WAS ACTUALLY

COMFORTING US.

HE SAID HIS LEFT HAND

HAD TO BECOME PARALYZED

AGAIN DURING A CONCERT

TO SQUEEZE A DROP

OF FEELING

FROM THOSE AWFUL

LONDON CRITICS.

HE SAID HE SENT YOU HOME

TO REASSURE THE CHILDREN

AND HE WAS

STAYING A FEW DAYS.

HE'D GET HIMSELF

TOGETHER.

DO THE CHILDREN KNOW?

THEY'RE IN SCHOOL.

THEN I SAID,

YOU HAVE YOUR WHOLE LIFE

AHEAD OF YOU.

HE SAID, I CAN ALWAYS

WRITE MOVIE MUSIC.

YOU DON'T

NEED TWO HANDS

TO PICK UP

AN ACADEMY AWARD,

AND WE ALL LAUGHED.

HE ASKED ME TO LEAVE

THE SLEEPING PILLS.

IT'S MY TURN

TO WALK GEORGE.

BUT YOU FORGOT

TO FEED HIM.

DON'T DO THAT

TO YOURSELF.

YOU WANT ME

TO STAY?

HI, MOM.

HI, AUNT SIDNEY.

I'M HOME ALL DAY

IF YOU NEED ME.

HI, MOM.

PETEY, DON'T FORGET

TO CLEAN AFTER GEORGE.

YOU ALWAYS FORGET.

WE'LL GET FINED.

GEORGIE PORGIE,

COME HERE.

MOMMY?

WHAT'S WRONG?

[CRASH]

[FOOTSTEPS]

MOMMY.

I'M SORRY THAT

I WOKE YOU UP.

CAREFUL

OF YOUR HANDS.

I'LL DIVIDE THEM

BETWEEN PETEY'S ROOM

AND MINE.

YOU WANT TO

CRAWL INTO MY BED

THE WAY YOU USED TO?

I PRACTICALLY HAD TO

FORCE PETEY

TO STOP PRACTICING

LAST NIGHT.

I THINK HE'S TRYING

TO MAKE UP FOR

ALL THE PRACTICING

HE DIDN'T DO

WHEN DADDY WAS ALIVE.

MOM?

HMM?

DID YOU EVER

LOOK LIKE ME?

YOUR BODY IS JUST

LIKE YOUR GRANDMOTHER'S.

SHE WAS

SO DISAPPOINTED

WHEN I DIDN'T GET

HER ROUNDED LINES.

HOW I LONGED

TO BE FULL-BREASTED.

YOU WOULDN'T LIKE IT.

IT'S EMBARRASSING.

DADDY ALWAYS SAID

I'D GROW UP TO LOOK

JUST LIKE YOU.

OH, I'D MUCH RATHER

YOU GREW UP TO LOOK

JUST LIKE YOURSELF.

OH, MOM.

OH, CATHY.

OH, HOW WOULD I HAVE

GOTTEN BY WITHOUT YOU?

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

[RING]

HELLO?

LARRY?

OH, JO,

WHAT IS IT?

THE KIDS

WON'T BE ON TWA.

THEY'RE ON BRITISH AIRWAYS--

THE CONCORDE.

MORTY ARRANGED IT

THROUGH THE COMPANY.

IT ARRIVES AT 9 A.M.

I'LL BE THERE.

NEENIE ASKED

WHAT SHE SHOULD SEND

FOR A WEDDING PRESENT.

I HAD TO SAY,

"I'M NOT THE BRIDE."

LARRY?

HMM?

GOOD LUCK.

BYE.

THANKS.

BYE, JO.

WELL, SHE HASN'T EXACTLY

WITHERED AWAY, HAS SHE?

I HATE TO SAY IT,

BUT IT LOOKS

LIKE SEPARATION

AGREES WITH HER.

SHE'S ONE OF

MY OLDEST FRIENDS,

BUT SHE'S HARDLY

IRREPLACEABLE.

THERE'S AN ATTRACTIVE

WOMAN. BETH!

COME AND TAKE

OUR PICTURE!

SHE'S A SAINT.

THAT'S THE ONLY

KIND OF WOMAN

WHO'LL GO OUT

WITH YOU.

BETH GOODWIN, THIS IS

LARRY LIVINGSTONE.

LARRY SHRINKS

WITH MARTIN

AT HAYS-WILLIAMSON

WHERE YOU CAN'T

TELL DOCTORS

FROM THE PATIENTS.

WE'VE MET HERE.

OH, YEAH.

BETH IS A TERRIFIC

PHOTOGRAPHER

WHO'D BE

A HOUSEHOLD WORD

IF SHE HADN'T DEVOTED

HER LIFE TO HER FAMILY.

SHE'S ALSO

A WONDERFUL WOMAN.

HE'S A SHIT,

SO I'M SURE

YOU'LL BE HAPPY.

I'M TRYING TO GUESS

WHICH ONE OF US

IS MORE EMBARRASSED.

I'D SAY ME.

YOUR ATTENTION,

PLEASE.

THE BIG SECRET

SIDNEY WANTS ME TO REVEAL

IS IT'S OUR

20th ANNIVERSARY.

[APPLAUSE]

SIDNEY WAS AFRAID

I'D SPEND IT AT THE HOSPITAL

THAT SHE INVITED YOU

TO KEEP ME HOME.

MY HUSBAND

DR. SENTIMENTAL.

WE ASKED YOU ALL HERE

BECAUSE YOU SWEATED OUT

THOSE YEARS

WE TRIED TO MAKE

A BABY,

AND YOU WERE GREAT.

YOU MADE US GODPARENTS,

THE RUNNER-UP AWARD

OF THE INFERTILE.

AS EACH MONTH, WE HELD

OUR BREATH AND WAITED

FOR THAT ONE, BRIEF,

SHINING, FERTILE MOMENT,

THERMOMETER AT HAND.

NOW, MARTIN JUST HAS TO

HOLD UP A THERMOMETER,

AND PANTING WILDLY,

I RUN INTO HIS ARMS.

SO WE THREW IN

THE TOWEL,

AND WE GOT

FIVE GREAT KIDS,

AND EAT YOUR HEARTS OUT,

THEY CAN ALL SPEAK

A FOREIGN LANGUAGE.

ANYONE INTERESTED

IN THE SOAP OPERA RIGHTS,

CONTACT MY LAWYER.

MEANWHILE, EAT, DRINK,

AND CELEBRATE WITH US.

[APPLAUSE]

[MUSIC PLAYING]

AND SO, MADAME,

WE MEET AGAIN.

TIME HAS NOT BEEN

UNKIND TO YOU, MY DEAR.

THIS IS JACK BARLOW.

THIS IS LARRY.

HI.

I RECOGNIZE YOU

FROM YOUR PICTURES.

HOW YOU BEEN?

GOOD.

I'M TAKING THE KIDS

SKIING THIS WEEKEND.

I WANTED TO TAKE THEM

TO SEE NEENIE.

IF THAT'S ALL RIGHT

WITH YOU.

THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

I'LL TAKE THEM SKIING

NEXT WEEKEND.

THANK YOU.

GOOD TO SEE YOU.

YES.

TA-TA.

BYE.

HEY, HOW ABOUT SOME DIN-DIN

ONE NIGHT THIS WEEK?

I CAN'T. I'M SO BUSY.

I'M GOING TO LEAVE

FOR EUROPE NEXT WEEK.

YOU KNOW, NEW ADS,

SAME OLD THING.

IT'S ON TO EUROPE.

ARE YOU GETTING ONE

OF YOUR HEADACHES?

NO.

ALL RIGHT, WELL,

BON VOYAGE.

LISTEN, EVERYBODY!

YOU CAN'T EAT

TILL WE DANCE.

OK, COME ON, GET UP.

HOW ABOUT

A LITTLE DIN-DIN?

OH, BUSTER.

DR. BUSTER.

DON'T YOU KNOW THERE IS

NOTHING MORE UNLOVABLE

THAN A MAN

WHO'S LOST HIS PRIDE?

SORRY.

YOU OK?

A LITTLE MIGRAINE.

A LITTLE ONE--

THERE'S NO SUCH THING.

ARE YOU HERE

WITH ANYONE?

NO.

IF YOU LIKE,

I'LL TAKE YOU HOME.

IT'S POSSIBLE

WE'RE RELATED.

[HORN HONKS]

WANT TO WALK

FOR A WHILE?

WELL, YOU'VE UNFURROWED.

YOU'VE STOPPED

PERSPIRING.

THANK YOU.

FOR WHAT?

YOU SAVED MY ASS.

YOU HAD A MORE EXTENSIVE

HEADACHE THAN I THOUGHT.

SORRY FOR THE VULGARITY.

I WAS THANKING YOU

FOR SAVING MINE.

GOOD NIGHT.

I COULD USE

A LITTLE NIGHTCAP.

WOULD YOU LIKE

A LITTLE NIGHTCAP?

HOW'D YOU KNOW?

MOM?

[DOG BARKING]

DARLING,

I'M HOME.

THIS IS GEORGE,

THE LOUDEST DOG

PER SQUARE INCH.

PETEY!

CALL GEORGE!

GEORGE, COME HERE!

HI, SWEETHEART.

OH, GREAT, MOM,

YOU'RE HOME.

THIS IS

LARRY LIVINGSTONE.

MY DAUGHTER CATHY.

HI.

HI, I'M PETEY.

HELLO.

WE AGREED YOU WOULDN'T PRACTICE

THE CELLO AFTER 10:00.

WANT SOME ICE?

I WANT YOU

TO GO TO BED.

WHAT DO YOU DO, LARRY?

PETEY.

I'M A PSYCHIATRIST,

I'M AFRAID.

MOM SENT ME

TO ONE ONCE,

BUT I DIDN'T LIKE IT.

YOU REFUSED TO GO.

YOU DIDN'T GO

TO ANDOVER, DID YOU?

NO.

GOOD NIGHT, CATHY.

I'M GOING THERE

NEXT YEAR.

OK, SEE YOU

AROUND, MAYBE.

GOOD NIGHT.

WHAT ABOUT

THAT NIGHTCAP?

WE HAVE VODKA,

SCOTCH, GIN, COGNAC.

OH, I NEVER DRINK

AFTER A MIGRAINE.

COFFEE?

THOSE KIDS SEEM RELIEVED

TO GET YOU BACK HOME.

WHEN YOU LOSE

ONE PARENT,

YOU KEEP WAITING

FOR THE OTHER ONE

TO FALL.

[CELLO PLAYING]

PETEY, WE AGREED!

WELL, THAT'S A NEW ONE.

A KID WHO PRACTICES

TOO MUCH.

YOU MIND IF

I SEE YOUR WORK?

MY WORK?

YOUR, UH,

PHOTOGRAPHS.

I DO BAR MITZVAHS,

WEDDINGS,

FRIENDS' ANNIVERSARIES.

BREAD AND BUTTER STUFF.

WHY'D YOU WANT

TO SEE MY PHOTGRAPHS?

WHY ARE

YOU SURPRISED?

FIRST MAN

WHO'S EVER ASKED.

WOULD YOU RATHER

I REQUESTED

A SAMPLE

OF YOUR BAKING?

HA HA HA.

WHOA!

HA HA HA.

THIS IS A PORTFOLIO

OF MY HUSBAND.

FOR THE LAST TWO YEARS

OF HIS LIFE,

HE SUFFERED FROM

CHRONIC PARALYSIS

OF HIS LEFT HAND.

THAT WAS GOING TO BE

A PHOTOGRAPHIC ESSAY

OF HIS RECOVERY

AND COMEBACK,

BUT THE PARALYSIS

RETURNED.

THESE ARE WONDERFUL

PHOTOGRAPHS.

HE WAS A WONDERFUL SUBJECT.

WHAT?

I'M THINKING

OF SIDNEY'S REACTION

WHEN I TELL HER

WE SPENT THE EVENING

LOOKING AT PHOTOGRAPHS

OF MY LATE HUSBAND.

THAT'S NO WAY

TO ATTRACT A MAN.

EXACTLY.

WELL, YOU CARED

ABOUT YOUR HUSBAND.

THAT'S UH...THAT'S

HARDLY UNATTRACTIVE.

DON'T ROMANTICIZE ME

BECAUSE MY HUSBAND DIED.

[CHILDREN LAUGHING]

ALL RIGHT, LARRY.

TIME TO GO.

WELL, IF IT ISN'T

THE WORLD'S CHAMPION

SON-IN-LAW.

I WOULD HAVE CALLED,

BUT I DIDN'T WANT

YOU TO SAY NO.

I CAN'T REMEMBER

THE LAST TIME

I SAID NO

OR THE LAST TIME

SOMEONE ASKED.

MISSING YOUR

NIGHTLY NEWS.

OH, WHAT WOULD HAPPEN

TO THE WORLD

IF I MISSED

MY NIGHTLY NEWS?

IT'S JO!

[MUSIC PLAYING]

SANTIR.

TO FEEL ALIVE.

HA HA HA!

[TURNS OFF TELEVISION]

I'VE ASKED JO

FOR A DIVORCE.

WHAT WAS HER REACTION?

HMM, SHE CRIED ADORABLY,

INSISTED I TAKE

HER OUT TO DINNER.

SHE REMINISCED

ABOUT THE GOOD TIMES.

WHEN I TOOK HER HOME,

SHE CRIED ADORABLY AGAIN.

ONE OF THE MOST

SENTIMENTAL EVENINGS

OF OUR MARRIAGE.

NEXT MORNING SHE

CALLED ME TO COME OVER

SO WE COULD BREAK IT

TO THE KIDS.

HOW DID THEY REACT?

I FELT

LIKE A TRAPPER

IN THE ARCTIC

SMASHING BABY SEALS.

IF ONLY YOU'D

GIVEN HER MORE TIME.

FOR WHAT? MORE

COMPARISON TESTS

WITH THE COMPETING

PRODUCTS?

YOU HAVE ONE GREAT FLAW--

YOUR JEALOUSY.

WELL, IT'S ALL

THIS JEALOUSY

THAT'S TURNED

OUT TO BE

A PRECISE EVALUATION

OF THE TRUTH.

DISTRUST CAN BE

A SELF-FULFILLING

PROPHECY.

DID I STOP HER

FROM BECOMING

MISS SANTIR, HUH?

DID I MENTION

TRAVELING

HALF THE TIME?

ONE MINUTE

YOU TELL HER

HOW PROUD OF HER

YOU WERE,

AND THE NEXT

THAT SHE'D SOLD

HER BIRTHRIGHT

FOR A MESS

OF POWDER.

THAT'S NOT

A BAD LINE,

IF YOU LIKE IRONY.

YOUR BEST LINES

SENT DAGGERS

THROUGH YOUR WIFE.

I RESORT TO IRONY

WHEN I'M INSECURE.

OUT OF ALL THE MEN

WHO WANTED HER,

SHE CHOSE YOU.

WHY WERE YOU

SO INSECURE?

I HAD MISS ALL-AMERICA

SLEEPING IN MY BED.

I JUST COULD NOT

BELIEVE MY LUCK.

CALL ME AN OLD WITCH,

BUT I STILL THINK

YOU'LL GET BACK TOGETHER.

[BELL RINGS]

BETH.

HI THERE.

WHAT ARE YOU

DOING HERE?

I HELP OUT

ONE AFTERNOON A WEEK,

BRINGING BOOKS

TO THE PATIENTS.

SIDNEY CALLS IT

CONSCIENCE WORK.

HOW COME I'VE

NEVER SEEN YOU

HERE BEFORE?

PERHAPS

YOU WEREN'T LOOKING.

YOU'RE IN LINE

FOR THE PHONE?

I NEED TO LET MY KIDS

KNOW I'LL BE LATE

BECAUSE OF THE STORM.

USE THE PHONE

IN MY OFFICE.

I REALLY HAVE

BEEN MEANING

TO CALL YOU.

NOT THAT I THINK

YOU'RE WAITING

BY THE PHONE...

OH, NO.

NOT FOR A YEAR.

A YEAR?

SIDNEY AND MARTIN ARE

HAVING ANOTHER ANNIVERSARY

NEXT MONTH.

WHAT DO YOU KNOW?

I'M FINE.

JUST SITTING OUT THE STORM

AT THE HOSPITAL.

DON'T WAIT FOR ME

FOR DINNER.

BYE.

YOU MUST UNDERSTAND

IT WAS THE ILLNESS

SPEAKING,

NOT YOUR WIFE.

IF YOU'D LIKE ME

TO SPEAK TO

YOUR CHILDREN,

JUST TELL ME.

I KNOW

HOW TRAUMATIC

THIS MUST BE

FOR THEM.

BRING THEM IN

TO SEE ME TOMORROW.

YOU HAVE

MY HOME NUMBER.

ANYTIME YOU FEEL

YOU WANT TO TALK,

DON'T HESITATE.

I WISH I COULD HAVE

SPARED YOU THIS.

GOOD-BYE, NOW.

YOU'RE A NICE MAN.

HA!

DURING OFFICE HOURS.

11 MONTHS.

CAN'T BELIEVE IT.

THE LAST TIME

I TOLD A WOMAN

I WAS GOING TO CALL

AND DIDN'T

FOR THAT LONG,

I WOUND UP...

YOU'RE A FUNNY MAN.

MMM. FUNNY WEIRD.

THAT'S WHY I BECAME

A PSYCHIATRIST.

I WANTED

THE COMPANY.

EXCUSE ME

FOR A MOMENT.

PAGING MRS. BETH GOODWIN.

TELEPHONE CALL

FOR MRS. GOODWIN.

HELLO?

HELLO, MRS. GOODWIN?

THIS IS DR. LIVINGSTONE HERE.

I THOUGHT IT MIGHT BE

A GOOD TIME TO CALL.

I WAS WONDERING

IF YOU'D LIKE TO TAKE

A WALK IN THE RAIN.

COULD YOU WAIT

WHILE I CHECK MY CALENDAR?

OF COURSE.

HA HA!

DR. LIVINGSTONE.

MAYBE WE

SHOULD, UH...

TRUST THOSE

FIRST INSTINCTS

THAT TOLD YOU

NOT TO CALL.

WHY?

YOU'RE

IN BETTER SHAPE

THAN YOU WERE

11 MONTHS AGO,

AND SO, I THINK, AM I.

WELL, WE DON'T

NEED ANYTHING

THAT WILL INTERFERE

WITH OUR RECUPERATIONS.

I'LL JUST WALK YOU HOME

AND SAY GOOD NIGHT.

I MEAN IT.

TAXI!

SON OF A BITCH!

I'D ASK YOU IN--

OH, NO.

WE PROMISED.

GOOD NIGHT.

DO YOU, UH...

DO YOU LIKE

SPAGHETTI PRIMAVERA?

YEAH. I MAKE A DYNAMITE

SPAGHETTI PRIMAVERA.

FRIDAY NIGHT,

MY PLACE, DINNER?

BRITISH AIRWAYS CONCORDE

PASSENGERS ARRIVING FROM LONDON

WITH CONNECTING FLIGHTS

IN NEW YORK,

PLEASE CHECK IN

AT THE BRITISH AIRWAYS

INFORMATION COUNTER.

BRITISH AIRWAYS CONCORDE

PASSENGERS ARRIVING FROM LONDON

WITH CONNECTING FLIGHTS

IN NEW YORK,

PLEASE CHECK IN...

YOU MADE IT, HUH?

THERE THEY ARE.

HELLO.

OK. I WANT EVERYBODY

TO MEET EVERYBODY.

ROBIN AND BILLY,

THIS IS CATHY

AND PETEY.

BETH, THE BIG ONE,

IS MY BRIDE-TO-BE.

ARE WE GLAD

TO SEE YOU.

Robin.

SO TELL THEM

I'M NOT SUCH A MONSTER

TO LIVE WITH.

HE'S NOT

SUCH A MONSTER.

THAT WASN'T EXACTLY

WHAT I HAD IN MIND.

HE HARDLY

EVER BEATS US.

RIGHT, BILLY?

HARDLY.

TRUCE.

BILLY, WHAT

DO YOU LIKE TO DO?

PLAY SOCCER

AND BASEBALL.

THAT'S GREAT.

MAYBE SOMEDAY

WE COULD PLAY CATCH

IN THE PARK.

ME AND YOUR DAD

ALWAYS PLAY CATCH.

IN A COUPLE OF HOURS,

WE'LL BE BROTHERS.

[APPLAUSE]

...WINS, 6-2, 6-1.

SENTIR.

TO FEEL ALIVE.

I DON'T SEE

WHY YOU'RE UPSET.

ALL I SAID WAS

JO HAPPENED TO BE

IN TOWN--

WE HAD DINNER--

TO GO OVER THE DIVORCE.

SOME COLUMNIST CONCLUDED

THERE'D BE A RECONCILIATION.

IT WASN'T

LIKE A DATE, EXACTLY.

AND WHAT

IF IT HAD BEEN A DATE?

I NEVER TOLD YOU TO

STOP SEEING OTHER MEN.

I STILL DON'T MEAN

THAT MUCH TO YOU.

OH, COME ON.

I KNOW

YOU NEEDED TIME.

EVERYONE SAID

JO DID A JOB ON YOU.

DON'T BLAME JO.

HER ONE GREAT TALENT

WAS SEDUCING MEN.

MARRIAGE INTERFERED

WITH HER VOCATION.

IT'S ALWAYS JO.

WOULD YOU GET OUT?

I REALLY--

I SAID GET OUT!

[PLAYING MOZART]

I PROPOSED TO YOU

IN WRITING.

SHOULD I

SAY THANK YOU?

THANK YOU.

IT WAS NOTHING.

IT JUST MEANT

OVERCOMING TERROR,

PANIC, FEAR.

YOU CALL THAT

A PROPOSAL?

I CALL THIS

A CONFESSION,

BUT I CALL THAT

A PROPOSAL.

AND YOUR ANSWER,

A REJECTION.

THAT IS WHAT THIS IS

REALLY ALL ABOUT.

YOU WILL

DO ANYTHING TO AVOID

ONE MORE REJECTION,

EVEN MARRY ME.

ON SECOND THOUGHT,

I TAKE THE "THANK YOU" BACK.

I REALIZE

I SHOULD SHUT MY MOUTH,

BUT I THINK YOU'RE NUTS

TO TURN HIM DOWN.

I KNOW THAT YOU THINK

THAT MARTIN IS

AN IDEAL HUSBAND.

HE IS.

WELL, HE ALMOST

LEFT ME

BECAUSE HE THOUGHT

HE WAS A ROTTEN ONE.

HE THOUGHT

AN IDEAL HUSBAND

SHOULD GIVE

HIS WIFE A CHILD.

YOU SAID THE PROBLEM

WAS WITH YOU.

IT TURNS OUT

HIS SPERM COUNT

WASN'T UP TO SNUFF.

HE TOLD ME

TO HAVE ARTIFICIAL

INSEMINATION.

I SAID I WASN'T

ANY HALFWAY GIRL.

THEY GAVE HIM

SOME DISGUSTING,

AWFUL FISH EXTRACT

TO INCREASE HIS COUNT.

HE FELT DEGRADED

BECAUSE HE REEKED OF FISH.

I SAID IT WAS

JUST HIS IMAGINATION,

BUT, IN TRUTH,

IT WAS LIKE SLEEPING

WITH A MACKEREL.

THE NEXT THING I KNEW,

I WAS FINDING WOMEN'S

NAMES AND PHONE NUMBERS

IN HIS TROUSERS.

AND HE WAS SMELLING

OF THE PERFUME

I'D GIVEN THE NURSES

FOR CHRISTMAS AT THE HOSPITAL.

HE WAS SCREWING

EVERYTHING IN SIGHT

AND MAKING SURE

I KNEW ABOUT IT.

WE WENT THROUGH

A LONELY HELL,

BUT WE STUCK IT OUT,

THANK GOD.

LARRY RESPONDED

TO JO DUMPING ON HIM

THE SAME WAY MARTIN DID

TO HIS INABILITY

TO MAKE A KID.

EVERY NIGHT HE BROUGHT

A DIFFERENT BIMBO

TO OUR HOUSE

FOR DINNER,

WHO LOOKED AT HIM

WITH GAGA EYES.

YOU KNOW,

SOMETIMES I THINK ALL

THAT TERRIFIC MALE EQUIPMENT

JUST HANGS THERE

BY A THREAD.

[PRACTICING CELLO]

HEY, MOM.

HI, HONEY.

COULD I HAVE

A GLASS OF MILK?

AND A COOKIE?

OR TWO?

I HAD A FEW

MORE THINGS TO SAY.

HOW DID YOU

GET IN?

I RANG THE DOORBELL.

PETEY LET ME IN.

YOU ARE A SHIT...

INVOLVING HIM

IN OUR AFFAIRS.

BETH.

BETH...

I'M A SHIT,

BUT SOMEHOW I'VE

GOT TO PROVE TO YOU

THAT I AM A SHIT

IN LOVE WITH YOU.

HEAR ME OUT.

IF YOU STILL DON'T

WANT TO SEE ME,

I PROMISE I'LL NEVER

BOTHER YOU AGAIN.

I REALIZE

I'VE BEEN IMPOSSIBLE...

EVEN TELLING YOU IN BED

THAT I WASN'T IN LOVE.

THAT'S UNFORGIVABLE.

WATCH OUT.

YOU'RE LOSING GROUND.

BUT DON'T YOU SEE?

SWEETHEART,

NO MATTER WHAT I SAID,

I ACTED

LIKE A MAN IN LOVE.

OTHERWISE,

YOU WOULDN'T HAVE

CONTINUED THE AFFAIR.

PETEY,

KNOCK IT OFF!

PEOPLE ARE

TRYING TO SLEEP.

NOW THE TOUGH PART.

ALL I BRING TO YOU

ARE ROTTEN ODDS,

A LACK OF CONFIDENCE,

BASED ON A ROTTEN

BATTING AVERAGE

AS A HUSBAND.

AND WITH THESE GIFTS...

I'M ASKING FOR

YOUR HAND IN MARRIAGE.

THAT'S THE DAMNEDEST PROPOSAL

ANY WOMAN EVER HAD.

LAWRENCE LIVINGSTONE,

DO YOU TAKE BETH GOODWIN

TO BE YOUR LAWFUL WEDDED WIFE,

TO HAVE AND TO HOLD,

TO CHERISH

TILL DEATH DO YOU PART?

I DO.

HYAAH!

THAT'S NICE.

SO YOU DECIDED

TO HAVE NOTHING MORE

TO DO WITH MUSICIANS?

I'M ON BETH'S

SIDE OF THE FAMILY.

I'M HER AUNT MATILDA.

WELL, NOT EXACTLY.

LISTEN, EVERYBODY.

WE HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT TO MAKE.

TEAR UP THE MARRIAGE PAPER.

BETH HAS CHANGED HER MIND.

SHE WILL MARRY ME.

WHAT'S A WOMAN'S LIFE

WITHOUT A GREAT CONDUCTOR?

SHRINKS YOU CAN

RENT BY THE HOUR.

I'M A FRIEND.

I INTRODUCED THEM.

YOU ARE LARRY'S

BROTHER'S WIFE?

DANA.

YOU'RE THE NURSE.

IT'S SO GREAT TO SEE

YOU TWO GUYS TOGETHER.

I CAN'T TELL YOU.

SOMETIMES I WANTED

TO BASH YOUR HEADS TOGETHER.

YES?

UH-OH. I'M SUPPOSED

TO MINGLE.

COME ON!

[ARF! ARF!]

YOU'LL BE HAPPY THIS TIME.

I FEEL IT IN MY BONES.

I SHOULD HAVE CONSULTED

THOSE BONES THE FIRST TIME.

BETH'S GOT HER TWO FEET

ON THE GROUND.

WHERE DO YOU EXPECT

TO FIND THEM?

YOU ALWAYS MAKE A JOKE.

I WAS BETH'S AUNT

BY MARRIAGE--

THAT IS,

THE FIRST MARRIAGE.

HOW DID YOU

AND FRED MEET?

WE MET IN ENGLAND.

YOUR MOTHER IS DOING

HER BEST OUT THERE

IN ARIZONA.

IT'S JUST THAT

SHE FINDS IT DIFFICULT

TO MAKE NEW FRIENDS.

SHE'S TOO PROUD.

HE WAS TEACHING HISTORY AT

THE AMERICAN SCHOOL THERE.

I THOUGHT HE'D

BECOME A PROFESSOR

AT A MAJOR UNIVERSITY,

BUT LIFE NEVER TURNS OUT

THE WAY YOU EXPECT.

I THINK I SHOULD HAVE

PROTECTED YOU MORE.

WHEN YOU GET MY AGE,

YOU THINK ABOUT

THINGS LIKE THAT.

YOU SEE, I WAS, UM...

PETER'S--

PETER WAS

BETH'S FIRST HUSBAND.

UH...

I WAS PETER'S

MOTHER'S SISTER.

SO THAT MAKES ME, UH...

WHAT DOES THAT MAKE ME?

[CLINKS GLASS]

I'D LIKE TO TOAST

THE HAPPY COUPLE.

HA HA!

WHEN I LOOK

AT THAT BIG LUMMOX,

I'M STILL AMAZED

THAT THAT'S MY LARRY,

THE FAMILY RUNT.

REMEMBER, MAMA?

UH-HUH.

LARRY, ON HIS 14th

BIRTHDAY, WAS SMALL

AND, UH...

BEARDLESS,

WITH A VOICE

HIGHER THAN HIS MOTHER'S.

REMEMBER, MAMA?

RIGHT. BUT WHAT

HE REALLY WANTS TO SAY

IS HERE'S TO THE BRIDE

AND GROOM.

MY VERY WORDS.

THANKS, DAD.

KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS

IN LONDON,

WHERE YOU GUYS

CAME FROM?

WHAT?

11:30.

It's five hours

past your bedtime.

That's why

you're so tired.

SARAH WROTE OUT SOME THINGS

FOR ME TO SAY.

I STUDIED THEM,

BUT I FORGOT.

HA HA!

HOW WONDERFUL IT IS

TO SEE HAPPINESS

IN THIS HOUSE.

WELL, IT'S TIME

FOR THE COMIC RELIEF.

EVERYONE KNOWS THAT

I'M CRAZY ABOUT FAMILIES.

I DON'T KNOW WHY.

MAYBE BECAUSE

I NEVER HAD ONE.

ALL THE FAMILIES

IN THE ORPHANAGE

WERE ON TELEVISION.

THIS IS

COMIC RELIEF?

THIS IS A WARM-UP.

MARTIN, PLEASE.

YOU'RE NOT ACCEPTING

AN AWARD.

I'M TRYING TO MAKE

A TOAST TO MARRIAGE.

AFTER 20 YEARS

OF BEING MARRIED,

SIDNEY FINALLY GIVES

IT HER APPROVAL.

DON'T WORRY. I WON'T GIVE IT

AN ALL-OUT RAVE.

MARTIN AND I HAVE BEEN SLEEPING

IN THE SAME BED SO LONG

THAT WE DON'T REMEMBER

THE NEXT MORNING

WHAT WE DID

THE NIGHT BEFORE...OR IF.

IT'S LIKE DRIVING

THE SAME PLACE EVERY DAY.

YOU GET THERE,

BUT YOU DON'T REMEMBER DRIVING.

BUT AFTERWARDS,

WHEN WE CURL UP...

I WOULDN'T TRADE THAT KNEE

INSIDE THE CURVE OF MINE

FOR ANYONE'S.

WHAT CAN I WISH YOU,

MY DEAR OLD FRIENDS?

HALF THE HAPPINESS

THEIR MARRIAGE

HAS GIVEN YOU.

YES. THAT'S GOOD.

THAT'S TRUE.

♪ SHOULD AULD ACQUAINTANCE

BE FORGOT ♪

♪ AND NEVER BROUGHT-- ♪

IT'S NOT

NEW YEAR'S EVE.

MARTIN, SHUT UP.

SING. IT DOESN'T MATTER.

EVERYBODY SING.

♪ SHOULD AULD ACQUAINTANCE

BE FORGOT ♪

♪ FOR THE SAKE

OF AULD LANG SYNE ♪♪

WHAT CAN I SAY

AT THIS HISTORIC MOMENT,

AS THE FIRST RECIPIENT

OF A WEDDING BAGEL

IN THE LONG ROMANTIC

CHRONICLE OF MAN?

NOW THAT YOU'RE MARRIED,

YOU'RE KISSING ME--

THE STORY OF MY LIFE.

IF IT DOESN'T WORK OUT,

YOU KNOW WHERE

TO FIND ME.

EH?

THE BRIDE AND GROOM

SEPARATED BY A HOLE

THEY'RE ABOUT

TO FALL THROUGH.

TALK ABOUT

YOUR AVERAGE SYMBOL.

I JUST LEFT ONE

VERY HAPPY HUSBAND

IN THE CAFETERIA.

ONLY TONIGHT HE GETS HIT

BY HIS NEW FAMILY.

ARE YOU REFERRING

TO MY FAVORITE GODCHILDREN?

THE DIFFERENCE

BETWEEN THE FIRST

AND SECOND HONEYMOON

IS ON

THE SECOND ONE,

YOU THINK A LOT

ABOUT YOUR KIDS.

THINK...

OR WORRY?

WHO WORRIES YOU

THE MOST?

CATHY, I SUPPOSE.

WHEN PETER WAS ALIVE,

SHE PRAYED

EVERY NIGHT TO GOD.

I GUESS IT WAS MORE

OF A NEGOTIATION.

SHE WOULD BE

THE BEST LITTLE GIRL

IN THE WORLD...

IF HE WOULD FIX

HER DADDY'S HAND

AND MAKE HIM HAPPY.

THEN HE LET HER DADDY

KILL HIMSELF.

ONE DADDY GONE

AND ONE PERFECT

LITTLE GIRL WHO TAKES IT

AS HER FAILURE.

NOT THAT PETEY'S

ANY DIFFERENT.

I SUSPECT HE THINKS

THAT IF HE'D ONLY

PRACTICED MORE,

HIS FATHER WOULD

NEVER HAVE DIED.

AND YOU?

ME?

I AM THE ONE

WHO FAILED.

FROM THE TIME YOU WERE 20,

YOU GAVE HIM

ALMOST EVERY WAKING MOMENT

OF YOUR LIFE.

WHAT COULD YOU HAVE DONE

THAT YOU DIDN'T DO?

HMM?

YOU WOULDN'T BE THIS HAPPY

IF PETER WERE ALIVE.

IT'S ALL RIGHT.

IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT.

HOW DOES LARRY FEEL

ABOUT THE KIDS?

THEY'RE NOT HIS PROBLEM.

AND IS THAT

WHY YOU CAME HERE

TO TALK TO ME?

TO PROTECT LARRY

FROM YOUR KIDS?

THE WAY YOU

PROTECTED PETER.

THAT'S MY JOB.

I ONLY WISH

I'D DONE IT BETTER.

I WISH YOU COULD BE

MORE FORGIVING OF YOURSELF.

MIGHT SET A GOOD EXAMPLE

FOR THE KIDS.

TOUGH WORK

BEING HAPPY, HUH?

LARRY, YOUR SOCKS

ARE IN THE TOP LEFT DRAWER.

YOUR UNDERSHIRTS AND

UNDERPANTS ARE IN THE TOP--

SLOW DOWN, GIRL.

NOW, WHERE ARE MY SOCKS?

TOP RIGHT.

TOP RIGHT. YES?

YOUR SWEATERS

ARE ON THE TOP SHELF.

TOP SHELF,

SWEATERS.

I PUT YOUR TOOTHBRUSH

ON THE RIGHT.

MINE IS ON THE LEFT.

OH! I WANT THE LEFT!

BUT THAT'S MINE!

THAT'S MY SIDE!

YOU KNOW THAT.

YOU'RE DOING THIS ON PURPOSE.

SO SOCKS ON THE LEFT--

OH!

PETER SAID THIS TIE RACK

WAS DESIGNED BY SOMEONE

WHO'D NEVER WORN A TIE.

I'LL GET A NEW ONE.

DOES IT BOTHER YOU

LIVING HERE?

IF IT DOES, WE'LL MOVE.

IT'S JUST THAT--

NO. IT REPRESENTS

SECURITY TO THE KIDS.

IT BOTHERS ME A BIT.

I'LL START LOOKING.

SWEETHEART.

WE HAVE BEEN MARRIED

BARELY TWO WEEKS,

AND YOU'RE ALREADY STUCK

BETWEEN YOUR HUSBAND

AND YOUR KIDS.

LARRY, DONNIE

WANTS TO SAY GOOD-BYE.

I'LL BE DOWN

IN A SEC.

HE WANTS TO

SHOW YOU OFF.

HE'S SO PROUD

TO HAVE A FATHER.

AND ABOUT MOVING.

LET'S GIVE IT

A LITTLE TIME.

WHERE'D YOU GET

THOSE JEANS? MMM!

[TELEPHONE

RINGING]

GEORGE,

STOP BEING OBNOXIOUS.

THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

I JUST SMELL ALL WRONG

TO HIS LOYAL CANINE NOSE.

NIGHT, DONNIE.

NIGHT.

NIGHT, JACKIE O.

I LOVE YOU FOR

BELIEVING IN ME.

I HAVE TO GO. BYE.

WHY IS IT EVERY TIME

JACKIE LOOKS AT ME

I FEEL MY FLY'S OPEN?

IT'S THE GIGGLES.

SHE'S STARTED

DOING IT WITH ME.

I KNOW WHAT IT IS.

WE JUST GOT MARRIED.

SO?

WE'RE DOING IT.

DOING WHAT?

A MAN AND A WOMAN

HER PARENTS' AGE

ARE DOING IT.

I CAN'T BELIEVE

THAT'S WHAT IT IS.

OH.

WHAT A COZY LITTLE PLACE

TO HIDE OUT FROM THE WORLD.

OH.

OH!

UH! UH!

HMM?

A LITTLE QUICKIE?

HERE?

YEAH.

ONLY IF YOU DO IT.

YES.

OH, GOD.

OH.

NOT WHILE THE CHILDREN

ARE STILL AWAKE.

AND SO

FAMILY LIFE BEGINS.

EEYAH.

NO MORE GETTING UP

AT 2:30 IN THE MORNING.

WHO WAS THAT

ON THE PHONE?

IT WAS BRONIE.

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

[RING]

IT'S THE OPPORTUNITY

OF A LIFETIME.

YOU'RE BEHAVING

LIKE A HOUSEWIFE

WITH A HOBBY.

THIS IS LARRY.

WHAT'S GOING ON?

LET ME HAVE IT.

LIFE WANTS

TO HIRE HER

TO PHOTOGRAPH

MY TOUR OF RUSSIA.

LOOK, BRONIE, I DON'T KNOW

WHAT'S GOING ON,

BUT WHATEVER IT IS,

WE'LL CALL YOU BACK

IN THE MORNING.

THIS IS

MY FIRST TIME

BACK IN RUSSIA.

I NEED

ALL THE SECURITY

I CAN GET.

DON'T WE ALL?

YOU CERTAINLY

HAVE STRANGE IDEAS

ABOUT WHAT'S

NOT IMPORTANT.

ONLY THE OPPORTUNITY

OF YOUR LIFE.

I THOUGHT THAT'S

WHAT OUR MARRIAGE WAS.

WHY SHOULD ONE

PREVENT THE OTHER?

LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING...

AS A PSYCHIATRIST.

UH-OH.

A WOMAN TELLS YOU

THAT HER BRAND-NEW HUSBAND

WAS SO BURNED

BY HIS FIRST WIFE

THAT HE SWORE

HE'D NEVER TAKE ANOTHER.

NOW THE WEDDING BAND

BARELY ON HER FINGER,

SHE PLANS

TO DITCH HIM FOR A MONTH.

HOW WOULD YOU

ADVISE HER?

WATCH OUT FOR ME.

LOVE ME, AND I'LL BE

A NEEDY, GREEDY BASTARD

WHO'LL GOBBLE UP

YOUR LIFE.

I CAN HANDLE THAT.

I KNOW. YOU DID IT

ONCE BEFORE.

DON'T BLAME PETER.

HE CAN'T TALK BACK.

[PLAYING SCALES]

HE'LL PRACTICE ALL NIGHT

IF I DON'T STOP HIM.

LET ME

TAKE CARE OF THIS, OK?

HEY. YOU REALLY

NEEDED THIS.

YOU DON'T KNOW

HOW MUCH.

OK. PUT YOUR HEAD

DOWN NOW.

[GRR!]

YOU'RE THE FIRST ONE

I LIKED.

ALL THE OTHERS WOULD

SUCK UP TO ME AND CATHY.

THEY WERE JUST

TRYING TO IMPRESS MOM.

I GLAD YOU GAVE THEM

THE HEAVE-HO.

LARRY?

HMM?

WHAT ARE YOU DOING

APRIL 23rd AT 3 P.M.?

APRIL 23rd, 3 P.M.?

IT'S FATHER-SON DAY

AT SCHOOL.

THE FATHERS PLAY BASEBALL

WITH THE SONS.

YOU PLAN AHEAD.

YOU'LL GO?

IF YOU DON'T MIND

A FUMBLER FOR A STEPDAD.

LARRY?

HMM?

I'M GLAD I'M NOT

GOING AWAY TO SCHOOL.

AH, ME, TOO, PAL.

DON'T SHUT IT

ALL THE WAY.

HOW'S THIS?

A LITTLE LESS.

A LITTLE MORE.

THAT'S RIGHT. THANKS.

OK. NIGHT-NIGHT.

I HARDLY

RECOGNIZE MYSELF.

YOU MADE ME

LOOK SO GOOD.

WHOA.

WELL...

I GOT TO

HIT THE SACK MYSELF.

NIGHT-NIGHT, NOW.

YOU, TOO.

♪ SEE YOU IN THE MORNIN',

SEE YOU IN THE EVENIN' ♪

♪ SEE YOU

IN THE SUMMERTIME ♪

♪ DA DA DA DA DA ♪♪

[SIREN]

DADDY?

FORGIVE ME.

IT'S JUST ME.

IT'S LARRY.

OH.

UM, I'M SORRY.

I DIDN'T MEAN

TO FRIGHTEN YOU.

YOU DIDN'T FRIGHTEN ME.

I COULDN'T SLEEP.

I WAS COMING IN

TO UNPACK MY BOOKS.

DON'T TELL MOM.

HEY, I BET YOU

USED TO COME IN HERE

AT NIGHT

TO BE NEAR YOUR DAD

WHILE HE WAS WORKING.

YOU'D FALL ASLEEP,

AND YOU'D WAKE UP

IN HIS ARMS.

HE'D CARRY YOU TO BED.

HOW'D YOU KNOW?

I DID THAT WITH ROBIN.

WHEN I WOKE UP

AND YOU WEREN'T THERE,

I GOT FRIGHTENED.

I WANT TO MOVE.

I THINK

IN THE LONG RUN

IT'LL BE BETTER

FOR THE KIDS.

THIS IS

THEIR FATHER'S HOUSE.

IT WILL ALWAYS BE

THEIR FATHER'S HOUSE.

AND I'M NOT

THEIR FATHER.

ONE OTHER THING.

THIS TRIP TO RUSSIA.

UM...

YOU'RE 36 YEARS OLD.

DON'T YOU THINK IT'S TIME

YOU DID SOMETHING FOR YOURSELF?

THESE ARE

SUGGESTED MENUS

FOR THE DAYS

I'LL BE AWAY.

THIS LISTS EVERYTHING

IN THE FREEZER.

CATHY'S FAVORITE FOODS

ARE STARRED.

DON'T EXPECT

THAT SHE'LL EAT THEM.

IMPORTANT NUMBERS--

DR. LIVINGSTONE'S

OFFICE,

THE DOCTOR,

THE DENTIST,

THE NEAREST HOSPITAL,

CATHY

AND PETEY'S SCHOOLS,

THE MARKET,

THE MANAGER'S OFFICE

AT THE PHILHARMONIC.

THEY'LL ALWAYS

KNOW WHERE I AM.

OLGA,

HOW CAN I THANK YOU

FOR STAYING?

THE REAL ESTATE AGENT

WILL CALL

DR. LIVINGSTONE'S

OFFICE

WHEN SHE'S SHOWING

THE HOUSE.

BE SURE THE CHILDREN

ARE IN SCHOOL THEN.

THEY'LL FIND OUT

SOMETIME,

SWEETHEART.

DARLING, IT COULD BE MONTHS

BEFORE IT SELLS.

THE CHILDREN

WILL BE MORE SETTLED.

I HADN'T COUNTED ON

CATHY'S FANTASY

ABOUT GOING WITH ME.

I SHOULDN'T HAVE

LET HER GET SO CLOSE TO ME.

YOU CAN'T

SPEND YOUR LIFE

IN BONDAGE

TO YOUR GUILT.

DO YOU WANT TO BET?

HA HA HA!

[MUSIC PLAYING]

GOOD-BYE, CATHY.

SHE'S GOTTEN

THIS CRAZY IDEA

THAT IF SHE DOESN'T EAT,

SHE'LL LOOK LIKE ME.

I WANTED BIG BREASTS

LIKE MY MOTHER,

AND SHE WANTS

SMALL BREASTS

LIKE HER MOTHER.

SOMEBODY UP THERE'S

GOT A SENSE OF HUMOR.

WHAT DID I FORGET?

DO YOU WANT

TO MISS YOUR PLANE?

BYE.

OH, SWEETHEART.

I'LL BE BACK

BEFORE YOU KNOW IT.

BYE-BYE, SWEETHEART.

♪ DA DA DA DA DA ♪

♪ GIVE MY REGARDS

TO TOLSTOY ♪

♪ REMEMBER ME

TO OLD RED SQUARE ♪♪

HEY!

MOM. MOM!

STOP!

WAIT, MOTHER.

YOU LEFT YOUR PASSPORT

AND YOUR GLASSES

ON THE TABLE.

I'LL KEEP AN EYE

ON PETEY FOR YOU.

I'LL MISS YOU.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

[KNOCK KNOCK]

WHAT IS IT?

LARRY,

PETEY'S SICK.

[COUGHING]

HALLELUJAH.

YOU'RE DOWN

TO NORMAL.

STILL THINK

YOU OUGHT TO

STAY HOME,

JUST TO BE

ON THE SAFE SIDE.

OLGA'S

GOT THE DAY OFF.

MAYBE I CAN CANCEL

SOME APPOINTMENTS.

I DON'T MIND

BEING ALONE.

NIGHT-NIGHT, NOW.

I'M SORRY

FOR RUINING YOUR SLEEP.

THIS IS AN ADVENTURE.

I LOVE ADVENTURES.

LARRY?

HMM?

I LOVE YOU.

I LOVE YOU, TOO, PAL.

[HUMMING]

[DOOR CLOSES]

[DOG BARKS]

OH, DEAR.

OH!

THANK YOU.

YOU HOME FROM SCHOOL

WITH A COLD?

WHO ARE YOU?

I'M SHOWING THE HOUSE.

HOW DID YOU

GET IN?

YOUR DADDY'S SECRETARY

GAVE ME THE KEY.

ISN'T THIS A PERFECT

CHILD'S ROOM?

LOOK AT

THE STORAGE SPACE.

THERE MUST BE

SOME SORT OF MISTAKE.

WE'LL BE OUT

OF YOUR HAIR SOON.

THIS HOUSE

IS NOT FOR SALE!

[ARF ARF]

I LOVE YOU, TOO.

[CELLO PLAYS]

WHAT'S WRONG?

THERE WAS

A WOMAN HERE TODAY.

SHE SAID YOU WERE

GOING TO SELL THE HOUSE.

THAT'S NOT POSSIBLE.

SHE SAID YOUR SECRETARY

GAVE HER THE KEY.

OH.

IT'S NOT YOUR HOUSE.

I KNOW.

I KNOW

IT'S NOT MY HOUSE.

PETEY--

DOES MOM KNOW?

YOUR MOTHER

AND I THOUGHT--

I THOUGHT

SINCE WE'RE STARTING

A NEW LIFE AS A FAMILY,

IT WOULD BE GOOD

TO START IT IN A NEW PLACE,

A PLACE THAT BELONGED

TO ALL OF US.

YOU CAN'T LET STRANGERS

LIVE IN DADDY'S HOUSE.

IF ROBIN AND BILLY'S MOTHER

FINDS A NEW HUSBAND,

WOULD IT BE FAIR

TO MAKE HIM LIVE

IN MY OLD HOUSE FOREVER?

THAT'S DIFFERENT.

YOU'RE DIVORCED.

AYY.

THANK YOU, GOD,

FOR SPORTS.

[CELLO PLAYS]

LARRY?

PETEY SAID

WE WERE MOVING.

WELL...

WE HAVE BEEN

THINKING ABOUT IT.

NOTHING DEFINITE

YET, BUT...

WHY DIDN'T MOM TELL ME?

SHE DIDN'T WANT

TO WORRY YOU

ABOUT SOMETHING THAT

HASN'T HAPPENED.

BUT WE ALWAYS

TALK THINGS OVER.

SHE TRUSTED ME.

[CLICK]

[MUSIC PLAYS]

[THUNDER]

SORRY I'M SO LATE.

WE DON'T KNOW

WHERE PETEY IS.

I'VE CALLED HIS FRIENDS.

NOBODY'S SEEN HIM.

THIS STORM

HAS PARALYZED THE CITY.

HE ALWAYS

CHECKS IN WITH ME.

HE'S OBSESSIVELY

ON TIME.

WHAT TIME

WAS HE DUE HOME?

AT 5:00!

IT'S AFTER 9:00.

I THINK WE SHOULD

CALL THE POLICE.

[DOOR OPENS]

HE'S HOME.

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?

YOU HAD US WORRIED SICK.

[SPEAKING RUSSIAN]

I'M SORRY.

THE BUS I WAS SUPPOSED TO TAKE

STOPPED RUNNING.

THE IMPORTANT THING

IS THAT YOU'RE SAFE.

THE NEXT IMPORTANT THING

IS TO GET

INTO A HOT BATH.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S WRONG,

BUT IN 30 MINUTES

WE WOULD HAVE HAD

THE ENTIRE POLICE FORCE

AFTER YOU.

THEY HAVE BETTER THINGS

TO DO THAN LOOK FOR ME.

DON'T MOVE UNTIL

YOU TELL ME WHERE YOU'VE BEEN.

KNOCK IT OFF.

YOU'VE GOT NO RIGHT

TO TORMENT HIM

BECAUSE HE'S LATE.

HI.

IT WAS RIGHT AFTER

I MET YOU

AND STARTED UP GROUP

THAT I STARTED

GOING OUT WITH THIS GUY.

THIS SATURDAY,

HE ADMITTED TO ME

THAT HE'S BEEN

SEEING HER

FOR 1 1/2 WEEKS.

I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN

TRUST SOMEONE AGAIN.

HOW LONG HAVE YOU

BEEN SEEING HIM?

FIVE WEEKS.

HE'S TRUSTWORTHY,

LOVING, AND CARING.

YOU'VE BEEN SEEING HIM

FOR FIVE WEEKS.

YES, BUT EVERY DAY.

HONEY, WHAT ABOUT

YOUR LIFE?

WHAT?

IN HERE, I'M ALWAYS

HEARING ABOUT YOU

AND THIS MAN,

YOU AND THAT MAN,

YOU AND THE MAN

BEFORE THAT.

I MEAN,

WHAT DO YOU DO?

DO YOU HAVE A LIFE?

SERIOUSLY.

DO YOU HAVE A LIFE?

YES. I HAVE A LIFE.

IS IT

DEPENDENT UPON A MAN?

NO.

BUT IT IS!

I HAVE MY CAREER

AS A TEACHER.

I'M TALKING

ABOUT SOMEONE YOU TRUST

AND PUT YOUR FAITH IN.

WHEN DID

YOUR FATHER LEAVE?

I DON'T WANT

TO GO INTO THE PAST.

I'M TALKING ABOUT

SOMETHING NOW.

WHEN DID

YOUR FATHER LEAVE HOME?

HOW OLD WERE YOU?

I WAS BORN.

THAT'S WHEN HE LEFT.

DID YOU EVER THINK

YOU'RE REPEATING

A PATTERN HERE?

CAN YOU STOP HER FROM

BEING THE PSYCHIATRIST?

I'M NOT TRYING

TO BE THE PSYCHIATRIST,

BUT I'VE BEEN LISTENING

TO THE SAME BULLSHIT

FOR THE PAST SIX WEEKS.

THIS IS THE SAME THING

WOMEN ARE ALWAYS DOING.

WHY IS THEIR

OWN HAPPINESS

REFLECTED IN

THEIR RELATIONSHIP

WITH SOMEBODY ELSE?

IT SEEMS

THAT EVERY TIME--

NO. STOP THAT!

THEY WANT TO GRAB YOU.

HAVE YOU BEEN

LISTENING TO ME

FOR THE LAST

SIX WEEKS?

I DON'T WANT A MAN

CONTROLLING ME.

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

EXCUSE ME. YEAH?

SORRY TO BOTHER YOU.

YOUR STEPDAUGHTER

CATHY CALLED.

SHE'S BEEN PICKED UP

BY THE POLICE

FOR SHOPLIFTING

AT BLOOMINGDALE'S.

BLOOMINGDALE'S.

BLOOMINGDALE'S?

THERE'S AN EMERGENCY.

I MUST LEAVE.

YOU'VE GOT

AN EMERGENCY?

BYE.

GREAT.

YOUR FATHER'S HERE.

[ARF ARF ARF]

DON'T YOU THINK

WE SHOULD TALK?

PLEASE...

NOT RIGHT NOW.

HUMOR ME A LITTLE.

YOU'VE BEEN UNDER

A LOT OF PRESSURE

LATELY.

LIKE WHAT?

FOR ONE, YOUR MOTHER

JUST REMARRIED.

SO?

I KNOW HOW MUCH

SHE'S DEPENDED ON YOU

SINCE YOUR FATHER DIED.

NOW HERE I COME AND...

AND, YOU MIGHT SAY,

TRY TO TAKE

YOUR PLACE.

JUST WHEN YOU THINK

YOU'RE AN ADULT,

YOU'RE EXPECTED

TO TURN BACK INTO

A CHILD.

TO MAKE IT WORSE,

YOU'RE TOLD

YOU'RE VERY LUCKY.

DON'T GIVE ME EXCUSES.

I KNOW I HAVE NO RIGHT

TO ASK

FOR ANYTHING, BUT...

COULD YOU PLEASE

NOT TELL MOM

UNTIL SHE COMES BACK?

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

[RING]

IT'S MRS. LIVINGSTONE.

FROM RUSSIA?

NO. IT IS THE OTHER ONE.

JO?

LARRY, WE'RE IN MAINE.

WE ALL FLEW IN

FROM LONDON LAST NIGHT.

IT'S NEENIE,

HER HEART AGAIN.

THE DOCTOR SAID

IT'S JUST GIVING OUT.

OH.

BETH'S AWAY.

HOW MUCH TIME

HAVE I GOT?

WELL, THEY SAID

IT COULD BE WEEKS

OR IT COULD BE DAYS.

SHE SAID, "I'M NOT GOING

TILL I GET GOOD AND READY."

CAN I SPEAK TO

ROBIN AND BILLY?

MORTY TOOK THEM OUT

TO A MOVIE.

WELL, THANK MORTY FOR ME

FOR, UH, BEING NICE

TO MY KIDS.

[PLAYING PIANO]

I KNOW, GEORGE.

IT'S NOT MY ROOM.

THIS IS NOT MY HOUSE...

THESE AREN'T MY KIDS,

AND YOU...

ARE NOT MY DOG.

SO, WHAT THE HELL

AM I DOING HERE?

WELL...

THIS IS GOING TO BE HARD

FOR YOU TO UNDERSTAND, GEORGE.

YOU'RE SO MONOGAMOUS--

ONE MASTER, ONE MISTRESS,

ONE FAMILY.

NOW ME, ONE INTERLOPER.

YOU SEE, GEORGE,

HUMAN BEINGS ARE PLAYING

A LOT OF MUSICAL CHAIRS,

MUSICAL HOUSES,

MUSICAL FAMILIES--

THAT'S THE NAME

OF THE GAME.

I'M IN

YOUR MASTER'S CHAIR.

A GUY NAMED MORTY

IS IN MY CHAIR.

SOME OTHER GUY IS MOST LIKELY

IN MORTY'S CHAIR.

MORTY'S GOT A CHAIR...

AND A FAMILY...

WHICH DOESN'T MATTER

BECAUSE...

NOW HE'S GOT MY CHAIR

AND MY FAMILY.

SO WHO'S ON WHOSE CHAIR?

NO.

WHO IS ON WHAT'S CHAIR.

WHAT IS ON WHOSE CHAIR.

WE ALL HIT HOME RUNS.

WE WOUND UP

IN SOMEONE ELSE'S HOME.

WE'RE ALL OUT...

IN THE COLD.

THERE'S A MORAL

TO ALL THIS, GEORGE.

NEVER MIX YOUR FAMILIES

OR YOUR METAPHORS...

OR YOUR DRINKS.

ANY OTHER QUESTIONS?

[WHIMPERING]

SOMEBODY LOVES ME--

GEORGE.

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

HELLO?

SWEETHEART!

AH, DARLING,

WHAT A SURPRISE.

I HOPE

I'M NOT WAKING YOU.

NO. NO.

HOW'S MOTHER RUSSIA?

FINE. HOW'S

EVERYTHING THERE?

ARE THE KIDS

ALL RIGHT?

JUST FINE.

OH, GOD!

WHAT A RELIEF!

[ARF]

OH, SWEETHEART...

YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT

YOU'VE DONE FOR ME.

WHAT DID I DO?

I ADORE YOU.

OH, HERE'S BRONIE.

HE'D LIKE

TO SAY HELLO.

LARRY, YOUR WIFE

HAS NEVER LOOKED

MORE BEAUTIFUL.

ALL THE RUSSIANS

ARE MAD ABOUT HER.

IGNORE HIM.

HA HA HA!

I BETTER

PULL TOGETHER

MY EQUIPMENT.

BIG HUG

TO THE KIDS.

OH, DARLING,

IT'S GOING TO

BE SO WONDERFUL

WHEN WE'RE TOGETHER.

GOOD-BYE,

SWEETHEART.

WELL, GEORGE, YOUR MISTRESS

IS THE TOAST OF MOTHER R...

AND FATHER R

AND BROTHER R.

OH, POOR BETHIE...

SHE DOESN'T FEEL

SHE HAS THE RIGHT

TO WORK OR RECOGNITION.

BAD LARRY--MAD BECAUSE

HE CAN'T BE A PART OF IT,

AND NOBLE GEORGE...

WHO KEPT BAD LARRY GOOD,

AT LEAST WHILE

HE WAS ON THE PHONE.

WE'RE QUITE A COMBINATION.

HERE I COME.

EVERYTHING'S

ALL RIGHT, ISN'T IT?

WELL, MORE OR LESS.

OH!

JO'S MOTHER'S DYING.

I'M SORRY.

I KNOW HOW

YOU FELT ABOUT HER.

I HAVE TO GO

TO MAINE THIS AFTERNOON

AND SAY GOOD-BYE.

YOU COULD HAVE

LEFT CATHY AND

PETEY WITH OLGA.

YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO

WAIT FOR ME.

IT WASN'T A PARTICULARLY

GOOD TIME TO GO.

OOH!

YOU ALL RIGHT?

YEAH.

SOMETHING'S WRONG.

NOTHING TO GET

ALARMED ABOUT.

PETEY FOUND OUT

ABOUT THE HOUSE...

MY FUCK-UP.

HE WAS HOME,

AND I FORGOT

TO HEAD OFF THE AGENT.

THAT'S NOT THE END

OF THE WORLD.

WELL, THAT DEPENDS ON

YOUR POINT OF VIEW.

HONEY, STEP BACK

THIS WAY.

IT SEEMS THAT PETEY...

EXPECTS US TO MAINTAIN

THE HOUSE FOREVER,

AS A MEMORIAL

TO HIS FATHER.

THE NEXT NIGHT,

THERE WAS

THIS TERRIBLE THUNDERSTORM.

SORRY.

NO SIGN OF PETEY,

MUCH HYSTERIA

FROM CATHY AND OLGA,

MUCH ACTING

UNHYSTERICAL FROM ME...

BAD ACTING,

I MIGHT ADD.

BUT HE CAME HOME?

DRENCHED TO THE SKIN,

FIVE HOURS LATE,

ENTERED PETEY...

TO BE CONFRONTED

BY A FURIOUS OLDER SISTER

WHO DEMANDED TO KNOW

HIS WHEREABOUTS.

HE REFUSED TO ANSWER

UNDER THE FIFTH AMENDMENT.

SHE TORE INTO

THE LITTLE FELLA

LIKE HE WAS THE GREAT SATAN

AND SHE, THE AYATOLLAH.

ENTER INTO THE BREACH,

THE WISE, NOBLE STEPPARENT

TELLING HER TO MIND HER OWN

FUCKING ADOLESCENT BUSINESS--

OR WORDS TO THAT EFFECT--

FOLLOWED

THE NEXT DAY BY...

JUS--JUST TELL ME

WHAT HAPPENED.

LET'S LOOK

AT THE GOOD SIDE.

SHE GOT ALL As

ON HER REPORT CARD,

EXCEPT FOR

A C+ IN GYM,

AND SHE'S NOT PREGNANT.

DON'T DO THIS

TO ME.

SHE GOT CAUGHT SHOPLIFTING

AT BLOOMINGDALE'S.

SHOPLIFTING?

A $10 PAIR OF EARRINGS.

YOU SHOULD HAVE

TOLD ME.

WHAT?

YOU SHOULD HAVE

TOLD ME, LARRY.

DON'T YOU THINK

I WANTED TO?

I WANTED TO GO TO

THE NEAREST SATELLITE

AND BEAM HELP.

I WAS TRYING

NOT TO REVERT

TO MY BAD, OLD,

SELFISH WAYS.

IT WAS MY FAULT.

I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN

SOMETHING WAS WRONG.

I KNEW SOMETHING

WAS WRONG.

I JUST DIDN'T

WANT TO FACE IT.

SOMETIMES...

I THINK LIFE IS

ONE ENORMOUS PILE

OF FAULTS TO YOU,

AND YOU SPEND

YOUR LIFE

DIVIDING UP

THE PIECES.

ONE FAULT FOR YOU.

ONE FAULT FOR ME.

ONE FOR CATHY.

ONE FOR PETEY.

THREE FAULTS FOR YOU.

TWO FAULTS FOR ME.

OK!

CATHY HAS NOT

MURDERED ANYONE,

NOR, DESPITE

HIS FANTASIES,

HAS PETEY.

AND AT THE RISK

OF SOUNDING

CONTROVERSIAL,

THAT ALSO GOES

FOR THE BOTH OF US.

SO, TELL ME, HOW ARE

THINGS IN RUSSIA?

I'M SORRY.

I'M PUNISHING YOU

BECAUSE I'M ANGRY

AT MYSELF.

SO MUCH FOR

THE OLD STEPPADRE

HOLDING DOWN

THE FORT.

IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT!

LET'S START

AT THE BEGINNING.

HI, SWEETHEART!

SWEETHEART,

WELCOME HOME!

HELLO!

YOU WANT TO KNOW

HOW THE FAMILY IS?

WELL, THERE

ARE A FEW

MINOR PROBLEMS,

BUT NOTHING WE CAN'T

STRAIGHTEN OUT.

JUST KEEP HOLDING ME.

HERE WE ARE, DAD!

NEENIE'S DYING.

OH, I KNOW,

BIG FELLA.

SHE'S JUST BEEN WAITING

FOR A LAST GLIMPSE OF YOU.

THAT'S A GIRL.

OHH!

SHE SAID

DON'T BE SCARED.

AND THEN SHE

GAVE ME ADVICE

ABOUT GROWING UP

INTO A SPECIAL MAN.

THAT'S HER REGRET.

SHE WON'T BE HERE

TO GIVE US ADVICE,

AS IF IT'S DONE US

ANY GOOD.

WHERE'S MORTY?

HE'S IN BOSTON

ON BUSINESS.

HE THOUGHT

IT WOULD BE GOOD

IF SHE SPENT

SOME TIME ALONE

WITH YOU.

YOU TOLD HIM

TO DO THAT.

OH! I DON'T THINK

YOUR SON INHERITED

YOUR DISCRETION.

HERE. I'LL DRIVE,

IF MADAM WAGON

STILL REMEMBERS ME.

IT REMEMBERS YOU, DAD.

EVERYONE REMEMBERS YOU.

MY SON AND PR AGENT

ALL IN ONE.

SHIT! IT'S GOOD

TO SEE YOU.

THE OLD AMBIVALENCE.

WHAT'S AMBIVALENCE?

HAVE YOU EVER

LIKED SOMEBODY

THAT DROVE YOU CRAZY?

ROBIN.

I CAN'T BELIEVE

YOU SAID YOU LIKE HER.

WELL, THAT'S

AMBIVALENCE.

MOMMY FEELS THAT

ABOUT YOU?

MMM...ON A GOOD DAY.

WHY?

OK, NOW, WE'RE NOT PLAYING

TRUTH OR CONSEQUENCES.

NO. WE'RE PLAYING FAMILY.

SO...HOW'S TRICKS?

I'M AFRAID I HAVEN'T

GOT MANY LEFT.

THAT'S NOT LIKE YOU

TO TAKE

A PESSIMISTIC VIEW.

YOU KNOW OUR RULE.

WE HAVE SO MANY.

WITH THE BIG THINGS,

WE DON'T KID.

SOMETHING ODD

JUST HAPPENED.

I WAS DOZING...

AND I WOKE UP

AND SAW YOU

STANDING IN THE DOOR...

AND I THOUGHT

YOU WERE JO'S FATHER.

JO IS LIKE HER FATHER.

SHE'S IN LOVE

WITH MYSTERY.

MARRIAGE ISN'T

VERY GOOD FOR THAT.

NOT THAT I FIND

MORTY VERY MYSTERIOUS.

OH, HE'S

PERFECTLY NICE...

I JUST WISH HE WOULDN'T

CALL ME NEENIE-WEENIE.

I'VE BEEN UNFAIR TO JO.

I WANTED HER TO BE ADORED

BY ALL THE WORLD...

AND I WANTED HER

TO BE THE PERFECT WIFE.

CHILDREN SHOULD BEWARE

UNHAPPY MOTHERS.

HEY, NOW.

I WON'T

LET YOU CRITICIZE

THE WOMAN

OF MY DREAMS.

WHAT'S BETH'S

MOTHER LIKE?

ISN'T THAT AWFUL?

I--I SOUND LIKE

A JEALOUS WOMAN.

I COME BEARING GIFTS.

PRINCES ALWAYS DO.

I THOUGHT YOUR OLD ONE

MIGHT BE WEARING OUT.

EVERYTHING I HAVE

IS WEARING OUT.

THERE YOU ARE,

YOU SEE.

MAGIC BILLY!

WON'T YOU TELL US

A NIBOR YLLIB STORY?

WELL, LET'S SEE.

COME ON.

HERE WE GO!

NIBOR, YLLIB,

AND THEIR DADDY

WENT ON

A TIME MACHINE.

THEIR DADDY BECAME

A WHALING CAPTAIN.

WELL, ONE DAY,

THEY CLIMBED UP

TO THE WIDOW'S WALK,

AND THEIR DADDY HAD

BEEN GONE A LONG TIME,

AND THEY SAW A SPECK

ON THE HORIZON,

AND SUDDENLY,

BILLY--

YLLIB!

YLLIB SAW

A DARK SHAPE

IN THE WAVES.

IT WAS A DOLPHIN,

AND IT SWAM UP

TO THE PIER.

IT LOOKED

AT NIBOR AND YLLIB.

IT LET OUT

A DOLPHIN SHOUT

OF RECOGNITION.

OOOWWW!

HE WAS A SPECIAL

KIND OF DOLPHIN.

HE WAS CALLED

A CARRIER DOLPHIN

BECAUSE HE HAD A POUCH

IN HIS MOUTH,

AND HE USED TO CARRY

LETTERS AND PACKAGES,

AND NOW THE DOLPHIN

WAS GOING TO BE

THE FAMILY PET,

AND THEY WOULD

SEND MESSAGES

BETWEEN THEM

AND THEIR DADDY.

♪ SEE YOU

IN THE MORNING ♪

♪ SEE YOU

IN THE EVENING ♪

♪ SEE YOU

IN THE SUMMERTIME ♪

♪ DOO DOO DOO

DOO DOO DOO ♪♪

♪ AH! SWEET MYSTERY

OF LIFE ♪

♪ AT LAST I'VE FOUND THEE ♪

♪ AH! AT LAST I KNOW ♪

♪ THE SECRET OF IT ALL ♪

♪ ALL THE LONGING, SEEKING ♪

♪ STRIVING, WAITING, YEARNING ♪

♪ THROUGH

ALL THE HOPES AND JOY ♪

♪ AND BURNING TEARS

THAT FALL ♪♪

IT'S COLD OUT HERE.

YOU SHOULD HAVE

YOUR JACKET ON, SWEETIE.

WANT TO SIT

ON DADDY'S LAP, HMM?

COME ON.

I TALKED TO YOUR MOTHER,

AND SHE SAID

THAT YOU AND BILLY

COULD SPEND

ALL EASTER WEEK

WITH BETH AND ME.

YOU ONCE SAID YOU WOULD

ALWAYS BE THERE FOR US

WHEN WE NEEDED YOU.

THAT'S RIGHT.

DADDY?

WHAT, MY LOVE?

I NEED YOU

EVERY NIGHT.

WELL, FROM NOW ON,

I'LL WRITE YOU

EVERY DAY.

YOU MEAN TO, DADDY,

BUT YOU FORGET.

MOMMY TOLD ME

HOW MUCH

MORTY LOVES YOU.

NEW PEOPLE DON'T

MAKE YOU FEEL SAFE

LIKE OLD ONES DO.

WHEN YOU AND MOMMY

TOLD US YOU WERE

GETTING A DIVORCE,

YOU DIDN'T CRY.

YOU DIDN'T EVEN

SEEM SAD.

WE...

WE THOUGHT THAT

BY HIDING OUR PAIN,

IT WOULD MAKE IT

EASIER FOR YOU.

IF IT WAS PAINFUL,

THEN WHY DID YOU

DO IT?

WE CAN TALK ABOUT THAT

WHEN YOU'RE OLDER, OK?

THAT WON'T

HELP ME NOW.

SINCE YOU AND MOMMY

DIDN'T SEEM UPSET,

I TOLD MYSELF THAT

YOU WERE JUST GOING

ON A LONG, LONG TRIP,

AND ONE DAY,

YOU'D COME HOME,

AND WE'D BE A FAMILY

LIKE WE ALWAYS WERE.

BUT, SWEETHEART,

YOU WERE THERE

WHEN BETH AND I

GOT MARRIED.

YOU AND MOMMY

GOT DIVORCED.

WHY COULDN'T

YOU AND BETH?

AND IF YOU FELL

IN LOVE WITH HER,

THEN ONE DAY,

YOU COULD FALL BACK

IN LOVE WITH MOMMY.

OH, I'M SORRY, ROBIN.

I'M SORRY

IF WE LED YOU ON.

NO, IT'S NOT

A GREAT NIGHT FOR SLEEPING.

REMEMBER WHAT YOU SAID

BEFORE WE SEPARATED?

A LOT OF THINGS

I WISH I HADN'T.

YOU SAID

IF WE SEPARATED,

WE'D EVENTUALLY

GET DIVORCED,

AND AFTER GOING THROUGH

A ROTTEN PATCH,

WE'D EACH FIND

SOMEONE ELSE

AND WIND UP HAPPY.

AND IF WE STAYED TOGETHER,

WE'D GO THROUGH

A ROTTEN PATCH,

AND EVENTUALLY

WE'D MAKE IT THROUGH...

STILL TOGETHER...

HAPPY.

BUT LOOK AT ALL THE MESS

WE WOULD HAVE SAVED.

I REMEMBER

WHAT YOU SAID

AFTER WE'D BEEN

SEPARATED FOR A WHILE.

YOU SAID

YOU WERE REASSURED

MEN STILL FOUND YOU

SO ATTRACTIVE--

SOME ROTTEN PATCH.

SOMETIMES I WISH I WOULD

HAVE FOLLOWED YOUR ADVICE.

YOU'RE JUST

FEELING VULNERABLE

BECAUSE OF NEENIE.

WHAT IF THAT'S

NOT ALL IT IS?

THERE'S A PART OF ME

THAT'S ALWAYS LOVED YOU.

YOU REMEMBER THE NIGHT

BILLY WAS CONCEIVED?

WE HAD THAT FIGHT...

AND I CAME UP HERE

TO GET AWAY FROM YOU.

I FELL ASLEEP,

AND WHEN I WOKE UP...

YOU WERE KISSING ME.

WITHOUT THAT FIGHT,

THERE WOULDN'T BE

A BILLY.

NO MORE GAMES.

HI. I MADE IT.

I'M SO SORRY

ABOUT YOUR MOM.

DID YOU GET UP THERE

BY YOURSELF?

HI, ROBIN.

HI, BILLY.

HOW ARE YOU?

LARRY,

GOOD TO SEE YOU.

DADDY!

YOU NEVER TOLD US

THE DOLPHIN'S NAME.

CARING.

YOUR DADDY NAMED

THE DOLPHIN CARING.

I HAVE GOT

A SURPRISE FOR YOU,

BUT YOU WILL

HAVE TO FIND IT

BECAUSE IT'S

IN ME POCKET.

I BROUGHT IT ALL THE WAY

FROM ENGLAND.

WHICH POCKET IS IT IN?

THIS ONE.

I'LL HOLD HIM!

HI, GEORGE.

YOU FEELING

ALL RIGHT, GEORGE?

TALK ABOUT MALE BONDING.

YOU'VE ONLY BEEN GONE

THREE DAYS,

AND GEORGE

CAN'T BREATHE.

CAN A DOG

GET EMPHYSEMA?

ONLY IF HE SMOKES.

LOOK AT THAT.

I'M SORRY.

I KNOW HOW MUCH

SHE MEANT TO YOU.

OH, THAT OLD GIRL.

SHE HUNG IN

JUST LONG ENOUGH

TO WAVE GOOD-BYE.

HOW ARE ROBIN

AND BILLY?

OH, THEY'RE ROLLING

WITH THE PUNCHES.

AND THE PUNCHES

KEEP ROLLING IN.

I'VE MADE A LIST

OF REQUIREMENTS

FOR OUR NEW APARTMENT.

YOU MAY BE THE CHAMPION

LISTMAKER OF THE WORLD.

NUMBER ONE,

WE HAVE TO HAVE

A BILLY/ROBIN ROOM.

THEY HAVE TO KNOW

THERE'S A PLACE FOR THEM

INSIDE THEIR FATHER'S HOUSE

WHERE THEY BELONG.

I GET

THIS AWFUL FEELING

I'LL START BAWLING

LIKE A KID.

IT'S ALLOWED.

WE'RE MARRIED.

I HAD THIS NUTSY MOMENT

LAST NIGHT.

I THOUGHT THE OLD GIRL

DIED DELIBERATELY

TO BRING ME BACK

INTO THE FOLD.

GOOD SON-IN-LAWS

ARE HARD TO FIND.

IT ALMOST WORKED.

I GOT INTO

THAT STATION WAGON

WITH MY KIDS AND JO,

WALKED INTO THAT HOUSE.

SOME ANCIENT VERSION

OF MYSELF SAID,

"YOU'VE COME HOME."

THEN NEENIE WENT AHEAD

AND DIED THAT NIGHT.

OF COURSE

I COULDN'T LEAVE.

I HAD TO STAY.

THEY NEEDED ME.

NEED,

THE ULTIMATE SEDUCER.

SHE WROTE THIS NOTE

REQUESTING THAT WE

SCATTER HER ASHES

OFF OUR PIER

AND INSTRUCTIONS

THAT NO ONE BE THERE

BUT JO, THE KIDS,

AND ME.

SO THAT BRINGS US

TO LAST NIGHT.

I GUESS, UH, WE...

WE, UH...

WE DID WHAT PEOPLE DO

WHEN SOMEBODY

IN THE FAMILY DIES.

WE TRIED TO

REWRITE HISTORY,

TRIED

TO MAKE EVERYTHING

THE WAY WE THOUGHT

IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE.

IT WASN'T.

YOU WENT TO BED

TOGETHER.

JO WANTED THE PROOF

SHE HADN'T LOST ME.

I WANTED TO

MAKE HER REGRET

SHE EVER

THREW ME OUT.

THREE YEARS

OF HURT MALE EGO

TRYING TO GET

ITS REVENGE,

BUT WE DID NOT

MAKE LOVE.

YOU DID NOT MAKE LOVE?

MY EQUIPMENT

WENT ON STRIKE.

WHAT CAN I SAY?

I KNOW.

EQUIPMENT FAILURE

SHOULD NOT BE

ONE'S LAST LINE

OF DEFENSE

AGAINST INFIDELITY.

[WHINING]

[WHEEZE]

HE CAN HARDLY BREATHE.

WE BETTER TAKE HIM

TO THE VET.

WE'LL HAVE TO CHANGE

THE NAME OF HIS CARD

TO GEORGE LIVINGSTONE.

OK, POOCH, IN A FEW MINUTES,

YOU'LL FEEL LIKE NEW.

THEY ALL HATE THE NEEDLE,

DON'T THEY, DOC?

NO. HE DOESN'T

LIKE THE NAME POOCH.

YES, HE DOES.

WE'LL KEEP HIM

OVERNIGHT.

HE'S NEVER

SPENT A NIGHT

AWAY FROM HOME.

SHALL WE RENT

THE ADJOINING CAGE FOR US?

I'D BETTER CLEAN

THE RUG.

GEORGE MUST HAVE

BEEN TERRIFIED.

HE NEVER PEES INSIDE.

BETH.

I'M TRYING TO SAVE

MY BEST ORIENTAL RUG.

CAN YOU MAKE SOMETHING FUNNY

OUT OF THAT?

DON'T TELL ME

IT WAS JUST A RUG.

IT WAS A WEDDING PRESENT

FROM PETER'S AUNT MATILDA.

I HAD

ANOTHER MARRIAGE, TOO.

I DIDN'T STAY WITH JO.

I CAME HOME TO YOU.

SHOULD I BE GRATEFUL

FOR YOUR SENSE OF DUTY?

OR SHALL I CALL IT

HONOR?

I'M SORRY.

WE BOTH MADE A MISTAKE.

IF WE ADMIT IT NOW,

THERE WON'T BE

ANY LASTING HARM,

JUST A LITTLE EMBARRASSMENT

WE SHOULD BOTH

BE OLD ENOUGH TO TAKE.

WE MET EACH OTHER

AT A VULNERABLE TIME

IN BOTH OUR LIVES,

AND WE HELPED EACH OTHER

THROUGH IT.

WE SHOULD HAVE BEEN GRATEFUL

JUST FOR THAT

AND NOT HAVE TRIED

TO PUSH IT INTO MARRIAGE.

WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?

WHAT WE SHOULD HAVE SAID

BEFORE.

GOOD-BYE.

MY IMPOTENT, PATHETIC

LITTLE CRIME

HAS GIVEN YOU THE GIFT

YOU'VE

BEEN LOOKING FOR--

PUNISHMENT

FOR BEING HAPPY.

ALL RIGHT, YOU HAVE IT.

I'LL LEAVE THE KEYS

ON THE HALL TABLE.

MY SECRETARY WILL CALL

AND MAKE ARRANGEMENTS

TO PICK UP

THE REST OF MY THINGS.

TAXI!

[WHISTLE]

IT WASN'T HONOR,

DAMN IT!

I CAME BACK

BECAUSE I WANTED YOU.

GOD KNOWS WHY.

I WANTED

TO MAKE LOVE TO YOU

AND YOUR DOUBTS,

YOUR GUILTS,

ALL THE TERRIBLE DEMANDS

YOU PUT UPON YOURSELF.

I WANTED TO LIE WITH YOU

IN THE NIGHT

KNOWING THAT YOU'RE WRESTLING

WITH YOUR DEMONS, TOO.

CAN'T YOU SEE THAT MY HEART,

MY GUTS, MY SOUL,

WORST OF ALL, MY HEAD...

IT'S CRYING OUT FOR YOU.

DO YOU THINK

SOMEONE'S TELLING US

THAT WE DESERVE

EACH OTHER?

[RING]

JUST WHEN

I FOUND SOMETHING

FOR A HEADACHE

THAT BEATS ASPIRIN.

[RING]

HELLO.

HI.

HI, DARLING.

WHICH DARLING

IS IT?

IT'S ROBIN.

HI, SWEETHEART.

DADDY!

HI.

WHAT WAS THE GIFT

THAT CARING BROUGHT?

CARING?

THE DOLPHIN...

THAT BROUGHT YLLIB

AND NIBOR GIFTS.

WELL, THERE WAS CORAL

FROM THE SOUTH SEAS,

AND A BEAUTIFUL

GIANT...PEARL

THAT WAS STILL

IN THE OYSTER SHELL

FROM THE SEA OF JAPAN,

AND DRAWINGS

OF ALL THE ADVENTURES

THAT THEIR DADDY HAD HAD

SO SHE AND YLLIB

COULD SHARE IN THEM...

AND A PERFECT SHELL

FROM THE PACIFIC

SO THEY COULD ALWAYS

HEAR THE OTHER OCEAN

THAT THEIR DADDY TRAVELED.

DADDY?

MM-HMM?

YOU KNOW.

♪ SEE YOU IN THE MORNING ♪

♪ SEE YOU

IN THE EVENING ♪

♪ SEE YOU IN THE SUMMERTIME ♪

♪ DA DA DA DA DA DA ♪

♪ DA DA DA

DA DA DA ♪♪

GOOD NIGHT, DADDY.

GOOD NIGHT, SWEET GIRL.

GOOD NIGHT.

GOOD NIGHT,

MY BILLY BOY.

I LOVE YOU.

LOVE YOU, TOO.

OH, I WANT TO HIDE.

[DOOR OPENS]

LET'S SHUT OUT THE WORLD.

THE OPERATOR SAID

THE LINE WAS

OFF THE HOOK,

BUT WHY WOULD SHE LEAVE

THE PHONE OFF THE HOOK?

IT'S NOT LIKE MOM,

BUT IT'S NOTHING

TO WORRY ABOUT.

YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO LEAVE

JUST BECAUSE I DID.

I DIDN'T FEEL LIKE

SLEEPING OVER ANYWAY.

NO BARKING.

THAT'S A FIRST.

MAYBE HE'S LOCKED

IN MOM'S ROOM,

AND HE'S SLEEPING.

NO. MOM WOULD NEVER LET

GEORGE SLEEP UP THERE.

THAT'S STRANGE.

ALL THE LIGHTS ARE ON.

GREAT.

MOM YELLS AT US

TO PUT THE FOOD AWAY,

THEN SHE LEAVES IT OUT.

SHE'S NEVER

DONE THIS BEFORE.

PEW.

GEORGE MUST HAVE PEED.

THERE IT IS.

OH, IT SMELLS.

LARRY'S COAT'S OUT,

TOO.

THAT'S ODD.

OH, GOD.

THERE MUST HAVE BEEN

A STRUGGLE.

[SIREN]

STAY OUT HERE

UNTIL WE TELL YOU

IT'S ALL RIGHT.

OH, BOY.

OH!

DON'T SHOOT!

WE FOUND YOUR FOLKS--

IN TIPTOP CONDITION.

WHERE WERE THEY?

I THINK

THEY SHOULD EXPLAIN.

HA HA HA!

HA HA HA HA HA!

THOSE POOR KIDS

MUST BE CONFUSED.

AT A TIME WHEN THE WORLD

IS COMING OUT OF THE CLOSET,

THEIR MOTHER AND STEPFATHER

ARE GOING IN.

I'M SO SORRY

THAT WE SCARED YOU.

OH, MOM.

PETEY?

I DON'T KNOW

WHAT I WOULD DO

IF SOMETHING HAPPENED

TO THE TWO OF YOU.

DEAR NIBOR AND YLLIB,

ANOTHER MOVING DAY.

WE'VE HAD LOTS OF THOSE,

SEPARATELY AND TOGETHER,

AND CERTAINLY,

IN YOUR YOUNG LIVES AT LEAST,

THERE'LL BE LOTS TO COME.

BUT WHEREVER YOU ARE,

OLD PALS OF MINE,

HOWEVER TEMPEST-TOSSED

THE SEAS WE SAIL,

YOU'RE ALWAYS WITH ME.

COME ON!

[ARF! ARF!]

BETH, COME ON!

PETEY!

CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY

THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING

INSTITUTE, INC.

LORIMAR

♪ IT'S VERY CLEAR ♪

♪ OUR LOVE IS HERE

TO STAY ♪

♪ NOT FOR A YEAR ♪

♪ BUT EVER AND A DAY ♪

♪ THE RADIO ♪

♪ AND THE TELEPHONE ♪

♪ AND THE MOVIES

THAT WE KNOW ♪

♪ MAY JUST BE

PASSING FANCIES ♪

♪ AND IN TIME MAY GO ♪

♪ BUT, OH, MY DEAR ♪

♪ OUR LOVE IS HERE

TO STAY ♪

♪ TOGETHER WE'RE ♪

♪ GOING A LONG, LONG WAY ♪

♪ IN TIME,

THE ROCKIES MAY CRUMBLE ♪

♪ GIBRALTAR MAY TUMBLE ♪

♪ THEY'RE ONLY

MADE OF CLAY ♪

♪ BUT OUR LOVE IS HERE ♪

♪ TO STAY ♪

♪ THE RADIO ♪

♪ AND THE TELEPHONE ♪

♪ AND THE MOVIES

THAT WE KNOW ♪

♪ MAY JUST BE

PASSING FANCIES ♪

♪ AND IN TIME MAY GO ♪

♪ BUT, OH, MY DEAR ♪

♪ OUR LOVE IS HERE

TO STAY ♪

♪ TOGETHER WE'RE ♪

♪ GOING A LONG, LONG WAY ♪

♪ IN TIME,

THE ROCKIES MAY CRUMBLE ♪

♪ GIBRALTAR MAY TUMBLE ♪

♪ THEY'RE ONLY

MADE OF CLAY ♪

♪ BUT OUR LOVE IS HERE ♪

♪ TO STAY ♪

♪ OUR LOVE IS HERE ♪

♪ TO STAY ♪♪

See You in the Morning (1989) - full transcript