See You in the Morning (1989) - full transcript

Three years after his divorce from his model-wife is the psychologist Larry Livingstone ready for a new commitment. He falls in love with the young widow Beth who has two children. But Beth and the children are still in mourning over their dead husband and father and Larry finds it a bit difficult to penetrate their reservations. Larry himself has to deal with his ex-wife and his love for his own two kids. Slowly both Beth and the children realise that they have to go on with their lives and that they have been giving a second chance.

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
WARNER BROS., INC.

♪ WHEN I FALL IN LOVE ♪

♪ IT WILL BE FOREVER ♪

♪ OR I'LL NEVER FALL IN LOVE ♪

♪ IN A RESTLESS WORLD ♪

♪ LIKE THIS IS ♪

♪ LOVE IS ENDED
BEFORE IT'S BEGUN ♪

♪ AND TOO MANY
MOONLIGHT KISSES ♪

♪ SEEM TO COOL
IN THE WARMTH OF THE SUN ♪

♪ WHEN I GIVE MY HEART ♪

♪ IT WILL BE COMPLETELY ♪



♪ OR I'LL NEVER
GIVE MY HEART ♪

♪ AND THE MOMENT ♪

♪ I CAN FEEL THAT ♪

♪ YOU FEEL THAT WAY, TOO ♪

♪ IS WHEN I FALL IN LOVE ♪

♪ WITH YOU... ♪

AND THE BIG RUNNING

OF THE LIVINGSTONE
FAMILY CUP RACE!

AND THERE THEY GO!
WOO!

WHERE'S MINE?
OH, NO!

NO, NO! LOOK,
DADDY'S IS STUCK.

OH, NO!

COME ON, PEPSI!

WHAT'S HAPPENING
TO YOU?



OH! OH! OH!

♪ AND THE MOMENT ♪

♪ I CAN FEEL THAT ♪

♪ YOU FEEL THAT WAY, TOO ♪

♪ IS WHEN I FALL IN LOVE ♪

♪ WITH YOU ♪♪

ALL RIGHT, TIME'S UP.

I WISH EVERY DAY
WAS A HOLIDAY.

THEN YOU WOULDN'T
APPRECIATE IT.

OH, MOMMY, THERE'D BE
JUST MORE TO APPRECIATE.

YOU'RE NOT SETTING
A VERY GOOD E-X-A--

M-P-L-E.

RIGHT.

YOU TAUGHT THEM
HOW TO SPELL, NEENIE.

"WE WENT TO A SECRET PLACE
BENEATH THE PIER."

WHAT DO YOU THINK
THEY FOUND?

A SUBMARINE?

A TIME MACHINE.

YOU WORRY TOO MUCH,
MOMMY.

BACK TO THE DINOSAURS.

THAT'S TOMORROW'S STORY.

GOOD NIGHT,
MY SWEET GIRL.

GOOD NIGHT,
MY BILLY BOY.

YOU STAY UP
TOO LATE, NEENIE.

I'M TELLING YOUR DOCTOR.

NIGHT.

NIGHT, BILLY BOY.

GOOD NIGHT, DADDY.

♪ SEE YOU
IN THE MORNING ♪

♪ SEE YOU IN THE EVENING ♪

♪ SEE YOU
IN THE SUMMERTIME ♪

♪ DOO DOO DOO
DOO DOO DOO ♪♪

YOU ALL RIGHT?

WE HAVE TO
HAVE A TALK.

WHAT ABOUT?

US.

US?

OK, HERE WE ARE.

GO AHEAD, PETEY.

SHOW GEORGE
HIS NEW HOME.

WHAT ROOM DO THEY
WANT THIS THING IN?

OK, TIME FOR BED.

IT'S BEEN A LONG DAY.

CAN WE PLAY
ONE HIDE-AND-GO-SEEK GAME?

TWO MINUTES.

OK.

WHO'S HIDING?

WE ARE.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5,

6, 7, 8, 9, 10.

OK, HERE I COME.

ANYONE AROUND
MY BASE IS "IT."

[LAUGHTER]

I GOT YOU!

NO FAIR!

THERE'S A SECRET PANEL
IN THIS ROOM. HERE.

HMM? HERE, HERE,
HERE, HERE,

HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE.

LOOK AT THIS.

A FAMILY JUST LIKE US

WELCOMED IN
THE NEW CENTURY

IN THIS VERY ROOM.

I BET THERE ARE GHOSTS
IN THIS HOUSE.

IF THERE ARE,
THEY'RE COZY, FRIENDLY GHOSTS

WHO WILL WATCH OVER US.

WHY?

BECAUSE WE LOVE
THEIR HOUSE.

MOM, WILL WE LIVE
IN THIS HOUSE FOREVER?

MAYBE YOUR DADDY
AND I WILL.

YOU AND PETEY WILL GO
AND GET MARRIED

AND HAVE
YOUR OWN HOUSES.

WE'LL ALWAYS COME BACK
FOR THANKSGIVING
AND CHRISTMAS.

AND YOU'LL BRING
YOUR CHILDREN.

AND WE'LL
INTRODUCE THEM

TO ALL
THE FRIENDLY GHOSTS.

AND EVERYBODY
AND EVERY SPIRIT

IN THIS HOUSE

WILL BE HAPPY.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO

IF I COULD NEVER
GIVE ANOTHER CONCERT?

THAT'S NOT
GOING TO HAPPEN.

YOUR HAND'S GETTING
BETTER ALL THE TIME.

THAT'S NOT AN ANSWER
TO MY QUESTION.

[BEEPING]

[BEEPING STOPS]

HAPPY WEDDING DAY,
MY LOVE.

[PIANO PLAYING]

[MUSIC BECOMING
DISCORDANT]

[CROWD MURMURS]

I CAN'T BELIEVE
HE DID IT.

WE SPOKE TO HIM
LAST NIGHT, YOU KNOW.

HE WAS ACTUALLY
COMFORTING US.

HE SAID HIS LEFT HAND

HAD TO BECOME PARALYZED
AGAIN DURING A CONCERT

TO SQUEEZE A DROP
OF FEELING

FROM THOSE AWFUL
LONDON CRITICS.

HE SAID HE SENT YOU HOME
TO REASSURE THE CHILDREN

AND HE WAS
STAYING A FEW DAYS.

HE'D GET HIMSELF
TOGETHER.

DO THE CHILDREN KNOW?

THEY'RE IN SCHOOL.

THEN I SAID,

YOU HAVE YOUR WHOLE LIFE
AHEAD OF YOU.

HE SAID, I CAN ALWAYS
WRITE MOVIE MUSIC.

YOU DON'T
NEED TWO HANDS

TO PICK UP
AN ACADEMY AWARD,

AND WE ALL LAUGHED.

HE ASKED ME TO LEAVE
THE SLEEPING PILLS.

IT'S MY TURN
TO WALK GEORGE.

BUT YOU FORGOT
TO FEED HIM.

DON'T DO THAT
TO YOURSELF.

YOU WANT ME
TO STAY?

HI, MOM.

HI, AUNT SIDNEY.

I'M HOME ALL DAY
IF YOU NEED ME.

HI, MOM.

PETEY, DON'T FORGET
TO CLEAN AFTER GEORGE.

YOU ALWAYS FORGET.
WE'LL GET FINED.

GEORGIE PORGIE,
COME HERE.

MOMMY?

WHAT'S WRONG?

[CRASH]

[FOOTSTEPS]

MOMMY.

I'M SORRY THAT
I WOKE YOU UP.

CAREFUL
OF YOUR HANDS.

I'LL DIVIDE THEM

BETWEEN PETEY'S ROOM
AND MINE.

YOU WANT TO
CRAWL INTO MY BED

THE WAY YOU USED TO?

I PRACTICALLY HAD TO
FORCE PETEY

TO STOP PRACTICING
LAST NIGHT.

I THINK HE'S TRYING
TO MAKE UP FOR

ALL THE PRACTICING
HE DIDN'T DO

WHEN DADDY WAS ALIVE.

MOM?

HMM?

DID YOU EVER
LOOK LIKE ME?

YOUR BODY IS JUST
LIKE YOUR GRANDMOTHER'S.

SHE WAS
SO DISAPPOINTED

WHEN I DIDN'T GET
HER ROUNDED LINES.

HOW I LONGED
TO BE FULL-BREASTED.

YOU WOULDN'T LIKE IT.

IT'S EMBARRASSING.

DADDY ALWAYS SAID

I'D GROW UP TO LOOK
JUST LIKE YOU.

OH, I'D MUCH RATHER
YOU GREW UP TO LOOK

JUST LIKE YOURSELF.

OH, MOM.

OH, CATHY.

OH, HOW WOULD I HAVE
GOTTEN BY WITHOUT YOU?

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

[RING]

[RING]

HELLO?

LARRY?

OH, JO,
WHAT IS IT?

THE KIDS
WON'T BE ON TWA.

THEY'RE ON BRITISH AIRWAYS--
THE CONCORDE.

MORTY ARRANGED IT
THROUGH THE COMPANY.

IT ARRIVES AT 9 A.M.

I'LL BE THERE.

NEENIE ASKED
WHAT SHE SHOULD SEND

FOR A WEDDING PRESENT.

I HAD TO SAY,
"I'M NOT THE BRIDE."

LARRY?

HMM?

GOOD LUCK.

BYE.

THANKS.

BYE, JO.

WELL, SHE HASN'T EXACTLY
WITHERED AWAY, HAS SHE?

I HATE TO SAY IT,

BUT IT LOOKS
LIKE SEPARATION
AGREES WITH HER.

SHE'S ONE OF
MY OLDEST FRIENDS,

BUT SHE'S HARDLY
IRREPLACEABLE.

THERE'S AN ATTRACTIVE
WOMAN. BETH!

COME AND TAKE
OUR PICTURE!

SHE'S A SAINT.

THAT'S THE ONLY
KIND OF WOMAN

WHO'LL GO OUT
WITH YOU.

BETH GOODWIN, THIS IS
LARRY LIVINGSTONE.

LARRY SHRINKS
WITH MARTIN
AT HAYS-WILLIAMSON

WHERE YOU CAN'T
TELL DOCTORS
FROM THE PATIENTS.

WE'VE MET HERE.

OH, YEAH.

BETH IS A TERRIFIC
PHOTOGRAPHER

WHO'D BE
A HOUSEHOLD WORD

IF SHE HADN'T DEVOTED
HER LIFE TO HER FAMILY.

SHE'S ALSO
A WONDERFUL WOMAN.

HE'S A SHIT,

SO I'M SURE
YOU'LL BE HAPPY.

I'M TRYING TO GUESS
WHICH ONE OF US

IS MORE EMBARRASSED.

I'D SAY ME.

YOUR ATTENTION,
PLEASE.

THE BIG SECRET
SIDNEY WANTS ME TO REVEAL

IS IT'S OUR
20th ANNIVERSARY.

[APPLAUSE]

SIDNEY WAS AFRAID
I'D SPEND IT AT THE HOSPITAL

THAT SHE INVITED YOU
TO KEEP ME HOME.

MY HUSBAND
DR. SENTIMENTAL.

WE ASKED YOU ALL HERE

BECAUSE YOU SWEATED OUT
THOSE YEARS

WE TRIED TO MAKE
A BABY,

AND YOU WERE GREAT.

YOU MADE US GODPARENTS,

THE RUNNER-UP AWARD
OF THE INFERTILE.

AS EACH MONTH, WE HELD
OUR BREATH AND WAITED

FOR THAT ONE, BRIEF,
SHINING, FERTILE MOMENT,
THERMOMETER AT HAND.

NOW, MARTIN JUST HAS TO
HOLD UP A THERMOMETER,

AND PANTING WILDLY,
I RUN INTO HIS ARMS.

SO WE THREW IN
THE TOWEL,

AND WE GOT
FIVE GREAT KIDS,

AND EAT YOUR HEARTS OUT,

THEY CAN ALL SPEAK
A FOREIGN LANGUAGE.

ANYONE INTERESTED
IN THE SOAP OPERA RIGHTS,

CONTACT MY LAWYER.

MEANWHILE, EAT, DRINK,
AND CELEBRATE WITH US.

[APPLAUSE]

[MUSIC PLAYING]

AND SO, MADAME,
WE MEET AGAIN.

TIME HAS NOT BEEN
UNKIND TO YOU, MY DEAR.

THIS IS JACK BARLOW.
THIS IS LARRY.

HI.

I RECOGNIZE YOU
FROM YOUR PICTURES.

HOW YOU BEEN?

GOOD.

I'M TAKING THE KIDS
SKIING THIS WEEKEND.

I WANTED TO TAKE THEM
TO SEE NEENIE.

IF THAT'S ALL RIGHT
WITH YOU.

THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

I'LL TAKE THEM SKIING
NEXT WEEKEND.

THANK YOU.

GOOD TO SEE YOU.

YES.

TA-TA.

BYE.

HEY, HOW ABOUT SOME DIN-DIN
ONE NIGHT THIS WEEK?

I CAN'T. I'M SO BUSY.

I'M GOING TO LEAVE
FOR EUROPE NEXT WEEK.

YOU KNOW, NEW ADS,
SAME OLD THING.

IT'S ON TO EUROPE.

ARE YOU GETTING ONE
OF YOUR HEADACHES?

NO.

ALL RIGHT, WELL,
BON VOYAGE.

LISTEN, EVERYBODY!

YOU CAN'T EAT
TILL WE DANCE.

OK, COME ON, GET UP.

HOW ABOUT
A LITTLE DIN-DIN?

OH, BUSTER.

DR. BUSTER.

DON'T YOU KNOW THERE IS
NOTHING MORE UNLOVABLE

THAN A MAN
WHO'S LOST HIS PRIDE?

SORRY.

YOU OK?

A LITTLE MIGRAINE.

A LITTLE ONE--
THERE'S NO SUCH THING.

ARE YOU HERE
WITH ANYONE?

NO.

IF YOU LIKE,
I'LL TAKE YOU HOME.

IT'S POSSIBLE
WE'RE RELATED.

[HORN HONKS]

WANT TO WALK
FOR A WHILE?

WELL, YOU'VE UNFURROWED.

YOU'VE STOPPED
PERSPIRING.

THANK YOU.

FOR WHAT?
YOU SAVED MY ASS.

YOU HAD A MORE EXTENSIVE
HEADACHE THAN I THOUGHT.

SORRY FOR THE VULGARITY.

I WAS THANKING YOU
FOR SAVING MINE.

GOOD NIGHT.

GOOD NIGHT.

I COULD USE
A LITTLE NIGHTCAP.

WOULD YOU LIKE
A LITTLE NIGHTCAP?

HOW'D YOU KNOW?

MOM?

[DOG BARKING]

DARLING,
I'M HOME.

THIS IS GEORGE,

THE LOUDEST DOG
PER SQUARE INCH.

PETEY!
CALL GEORGE!

GEORGE, COME HERE!

GEORGE, COME HERE!

HI, SWEETHEART.

OH, GREAT, MOM,
YOU'RE HOME.

THIS IS
LARRY LIVINGSTONE.

MY DAUGHTER CATHY.

HI.

HI, I'M PETEY.

HELLO.

WE AGREED YOU WOULDN'T PRACTICE
THE CELLO AFTER 10:00.

WANT SOME ICE?

I WANT YOU
TO GO TO BED.

WHAT DO YOU DO, LARRY?

PETEY.

I'M A PSYCHIATRIST,
I'M AFRAID.

MOM SENT ME
TO ONE ONCE,

BUT I DIDN'T LIKE IT.

YOU REFUSED TO GO.

YOU DIDN'T GO
TO ANDOVER, DID YOU?

NO.

GOOD NIGHT, CATHY.

I'M GOING THERE
NEXT YEAR.

OK, SEE YOU
AROUND, MAYBE.

GOOD NIGHT.

GOOD NIGHT.

WHAT ABOUT
THAT NIGHTCAP?

WE HAVE VODKA,
SCOTCH, GIN, COGNAC.

OH, I NEVER DRINK
AFTER A MIGRAINE.

COFFEE?

THOSE KIDS SEEM RELIEVED
TO GET YOU BACK HOME.

WHEN YOU LOSE
ONE PARENT,

YOU KEEP WAITING

FOR THE OTHER ONE
TO FALL.

[CELLO PLAYING]

PETEY, WE AGREED!

WELL, THAT'S A NEW ONE.

A KID WHO PRACTICES
TOO MUCH.

YOU MIND IF
I SEE YOUR WORK?

MY WORK?

YOUR, UH,
PHOTOGRAPHS.

I DO BAR MITZVAHS,
WEDDINGS,

FRIENDS' ANNIVERSARIES.

BREAD AND BUTTER STUFF.

WHY'D YOU WANT
TO SEE MY PHOTGRAPHS?

WHY ARE
YOU SURPRISED?

FIRST MAN
WHO'S EVER ASKED.

WOULD YOU RATHER
I REQUESTED

A SAMPLE
OF YOUR BAKING?

HA HA HA.

WHOA!

HA HA HA.

THIS IS A PORTFOLIO
OF MY HUSBAND.

FOR THE LAST TWO YEARS
OF HIS LIFE,

HE SUFFERED FROM
CHRONIC PARALYSIS

OF HIS LEFT HAND.

THAT WAS GOING TO BE

A PHOTOGRAPHIC ESSAY

OF HIS RECOVERY
AND COMEBACK,

BUT THE PARALYSIS
RETURNED.

THESE ARE WONDERFUL
PHOTOGRAPHS.

HE WAS A WONDERFUL SUBJECT.

WHAT?

I'M THINKING
OF SIDNEY'S REACTION

WHEN I TELL HER

WE SPENT THE EVENING
LOOKING AT PHOTOGRAPHS

OF MY LATE HUSBAND.

THAT'S NO WAY
TO ATTRACT A MAN.

EXACTLY.

WELL, YOU CARED

ABOUT YOUR HUSBAND.

THAT'S UH...THAT'S
HARDLY UNATTRACTIVE.

DON'T ROMANTICIZE ME
BECAUSE MY HUSBAND DIED.

[CHILDREN LAUGHING]

ALL RIGHT, LARRY.
TIME TO GO.

WELL, IF IT ISN'T

THE WORLD'S CHAMPION
SON-IN-LAW.

I WOULD HAVE CALLED,

BUT I DIDN'T WANT
YOU TO SAY NO.

I CAN'T REMEMBER

THE LAST TIME
I SAID NO

OR THE LAST TIME
SOMEONE ASKED.

MISSING YOUR
NIGHTLY NEWS.

OH, WHAT WOULD HAPPEN
TO THE WORLD

IF I MISSED
MY NIGHTLY NEWS?

IT'S JO!
IT'S JO!

[MUSIC PLAYING]

SANTIR.

TO FEEL ALIVE.

HA HA HA!

[TURNS OFF TELEVISION]

I'VE ASKED JO
FOR A DIVORCE.

WHAT WAS HER REACTION?

HMM, SHE CRIED ADORABLY,

INSISTED I TAKE
HER OUT TO DINNER.

SHE REMINISCED
ABOUT THE GOOD TIMES.

WHEN I TOOK HER HOME,
SHE CRIED ADORABLY AGAIN.

ONE OF THE MOST
SENTIMENTAL EVENINGS

OF OUR MARRIAGE.

NEXT MORNING SHE
CALLED ME TO COME OVER

SO WE COULD BREAK IT
TO THE KIDS.

HOW DID THEY REACT?

I FELT
LIKE A TRAPPER

IN THE ARCTIC
SMASHING BABY SEALS.

IF ONLY YOU'D
GIVEN HER MORE TIME.

FOR WHAT? MORE
COMPARISON TESTS

WITH THE COMPETING
PRODUCTS?

YOU HAVE ONE GREAT FLAW--
YOUR JEALOUSY.

WELL, IT'S ALL
THIS JEALOUSY

THAT'S TURNED
OUT TO BE

A PRECISE EVALUATION
OF THE TRUTH.

DISTRUST CAN BE

A SELF-FULFILLING
PROPHECY.

DID I STOP HER
FROM BECOMING
MISS SANTIR, HUH?

DID I MENTION

TRAVELING
HALF THE TIME?

ONE MINUTE
YOU TELL HER

HOW PROUD OF HER
YOU WERE,

AND THE NEXT

THAT SHE'D SOLD
HER BIRTHRIGHT

FOR A MESS
OF POWDER.

THAT'S NOT
A BAD LINE,

IF YOU LIKE IRONY.

YOUR BEST LINES
SENT DAGGERS

THROUGH YOUR WIFE.

I RESORT TO IRONY
WHEN I'M INSECURE.

OUT OF ALL THE MEN
WHO WANTED HER,

SHE CHOSE YOU.

WHY WERE YOU
SO INSECURE?

I HAD MISS ALL-AMERICA
SLEEPING IN MY BED.

I JUST COULD NOT
BELIEVE MY LUCK.

CALL ME AN OLD WITCH,

BUT I STILL THINK
YOU'LL GET BACK TOGETHER.

[BELL RINGS]

BETH.

HI THERE.

WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE?

I HELP OUT
ONE AFTERNOON A WEEK,

BRINGING BOOKS
TO THE PATIENTS.

SIDNEY CALLS IT
CONSCIENCE WORK.

HOW COME I'VE
NEVER SEEN YOU
HERE BEFORE?

PERHAPS
YOU WEREN'T LOOKING.

YOU'RE IN LINE
FOR THE PHONE?

I NEED TO LET MY KIDS
KNOW I'LL BE LATE

BECAUSE OF THE STORM.

USE THE PHONE
IN MY OFFICE.

I REALLY HAVE
BEEN MEANING
TO CALL YOU.

NOT THAT I THINK
YOU'RE WAITING
BY THE PHONE...

OH, NO.
NOT FOR A YEAR.

A YEAR?

SIDNEY AND MARTIN ARE
HAVING ANOTHER ANNIVERSARY

NEXT MONTH.

WHAT DO YOU KNOW?

I'M FINE.

JUST SITTING OUT THE STORM
AT THE HOSPITAL.

DON'T WAIT FOR ME
FOR DINNER.

BYE.

YOU MUST UNDERSTAND
IT WAS THE ILLNESS
SPEAKING,

NOT YOUR WIFE.

IF YOU'D LIKE ME
TO SPEAK TO
YOUR CHILDREN,

JUST TELL ME.

I KNOW
HOW TRAUMATIC

THIS MUST BE
FOR THEM.

BRING THEM IN
TO SEE ME TOMORROW.

YOU HAVE
MY HOME NUMBER.

ANYTIME YOU FEEL
YOU WANT TO TALK,
DON'T HESITATE.

I WISH I COULD HAVE
SPARED YOU THIS.

GOOD-BYE, NOW.

YOU'RE A NICE MAN.

HA!

DURING OFFICE HOURS.

11 MONTHS.
CAN'T BELIEVE IT.

THE LAST TIME
I TOLD A WOMAN

I WAS GOING TO CALL
AND DIDN'T
FOR THAT LONG,

I WOUND UP...

YOU'RE A FUNNY MAN.

MMM. FUNNY WEIRD.

THAT'S WHY I BECAME
A PSYCHIATRIST.

I WANTED
THE COMPANY.

EXCUSE ME
FOR A MOMENT.

PAGING MRS. BETH GOODWIN.

TELEPHONE CALL
FOR MRS. GOODWIN.

HELLO?

HELLO, MRS. GOODWIN?
THIS IS DR. LIVINGSTONE HERE.

I THOUGHT IT MIGHT BE
A GOOD TIME TO CALL.

I WAS WONDERING
IF YOU'D LIKE TO TAKE
A WALK IN THE RAIN.

COULD YOU WAIT
WHILE I CHECK MY CALENDAR?

OF COURSE.

HA HA!

DR. LIVINGSTONE.

MAYBE WE
SHOULD, UH...

TRUST THOSE
FIRST INSTINCTS

THAT TOLD YOU
NOT TO CALL.

WHY?

YOU'RE
IN BETTER SHAPE

THAN YOU WERE
11 MONTHS AGO,

AND SO, I THINK, AM I.

WELL, WE DON'T
NEED ANYTHING

THAT WILL INTERFERE
WITH OUR RECUPERATIONS.

I'LL JUST WALK YOU HOME
AND SAY GOOD NIGHT.

I MEAN IT.

TAXI!

SON OF A BITCH!

I'D ASK YOU IN--

OH, NO.
WE PROMISED.

GOOD NIGHT.

GOOD NIGHT.

DO YOU, UH...

DO YOU LIKE
SPAGHETTI PRIMAVERA?

SPAGHETTI PRIMAVERA?

YEAH. I MAKE A DYNAMITE
SPAGHETTI PRIMAVERA.

FRIDAY NIGHT,

MY PLACE, DINNER?

BRITISH AIRWAYS CONCORDE
PASSENGERS ARRIVING FROM LONDON

WITH CONNECTING FLIGHTS
IN NEW YORK,

PLEASE CHECK IN

AT THE BRITISH AIRWAYS
INFORMATION COUNTER.

BRITISH AIRWAYS CONCORDE
PASSENGERS ARRIVING FROM LONDON

WITH CONNECTING FLIGHTS
IN NEW YORK,

PLEASE CHECK IN...

YOU MADE IT, HUH?

THERE THEY ARE.

HELLO.

HELLO.

OK. I WANT EVERYBODY
TO MEET EVERYBODY.

ROBIN AND BILLY,

THIS IS CATHY
AND PETEY.

BETH, THE BIG ONE,
IS MY BRIDE-TO-BE.

ARE WE GLAD
TO SEE YOU.

Robin.

SO TELL THEM

I'M NOT SUCH A MONSTER
TO LIVE WITH.

HE'S NOT
SUCH A MONSTER.

THAT WASN'T EXACTLY
WHAT I HAD IN MIND.

HE HARDLY
EVER BEATS US.
RIGHT, BILLY?

HARDLY.

TRUCE.

BILLY, WHAT
DO YOU LIKE TO DO?

PLAY SOCCER
AND BASEBALL.

THAT'S GREAT.

MAYBE SOMEDAY
WE COULD PLAY CATCH
IN THE PARK.

ME AND YOUR DAD
ALWAYS PLAY CATCH.

IN A COUPLE OF HOURS,
WE'LL BE BROTHERS.

[APPLAUSE]

...WINS, 6-2, 6-1.

SENTIR.

TO FEEL ALIVE.

I DON'T SEE
WHY YOU'RE UPSET.

ALL I SAID WAS
JO HAPPENED TO BE
IN TOWN--

WE HAD DINNER--
TO GO OVER THE DIVORCE.

SOME COLUMNIST CONCLUDED
THERE'D BE A RECONCILIATION.

IT WASN'T
LIKE A DATE, EXACTLY.

AND WHAT
IF IT HAD BEEN A DATE?

I NEVER TOLD YOU TO
STOP SEEING OTHER MEN.

I STILL DON'T MEAN
THAT MUCH TO YOU.

OH, COME ON.

I KNOW
YOU NEEDED TIME.

EVERYONE SAID
JO DID A JOB ON YOU.

DON'T BLAME JO.

HER ONE GREAT TALENT
WAS SEDUCING MEN.

MARRIAGE INTERFERED
WITH HER VOCATION.

IT'S ALWAYS JO.

WOULD YOU GET OUT?

I REALLY--

I SAID GET OUT!

[PLAYING MOZART]

I PROPOSED TO YOU
IN WRITING.

SHOULD I
SAY THANK YOU?

THANK YOU.

IT WAS NOTHING.

IT JUST MEANT
OVERCOMING TERROR,
PANIC, FEAR.

YOU CALL THAT
A PROPOSAL?

I CALL THIS
A CONFESSION,

BUT I CALL THAT
A PROPOSAL.

AND YOUR ANSWER,
A REJECTION.

THAT IS WHAT THIS IS
REALLY ALL ABOUT.

YOU WILL
DO ANYTHING TO AVOID
ONE MORE REJECTION,

EVEN MARRY ME.

ON SECOND THOUGHT,
I TAKE THE "THANK YOU" BACK.

I REALIZE
I SHOULD SHUT MY MOUTH,

BUT I THINK YOU'RE NUTS
TO TURN HIM DOWN.

I KNOW THAT YOU THINK

THAT MARTIN IS
AN IDEAL HUSBAND.

HE IS.

WELL, HE ALMOST
LEFT ME

BECAUSE HE THOUGHT
HE WAS A ROTTEN ONE.

HE THOUGHT
AN IDEAL HUSBAND

SHOULD GIVE
HIS WIFE A CHILD.

YOU SAID THE PROBLEM
WAS WITH YOU.

IT TURNS OUT
HIS SPERM COUNT
WASN'T UP TO SNUFF.

HE TOLD ME
TO HAVE ARTIFICIAL
INSEMINATION.

I SAID I WASN'T
ANY HALFWAY GIRL.

THEY GAVE HIM
SOME DISGUSTING,
AWFUL FISH EXTRACT

TO INCREASE HIS COUNT.

HE FELT DEGRADED
BECAUSE HE REEKED OF FISH.

I SAID IT WAS
JUST HIS IMAGINATION,

BUT, IN TRUTH,
IT WAS LIKE SLEEPING
WITH A MACKEREL.

THE NEXT THING I KNEW,

I WAS FINDING WOMEN'S
NAMES AND PHONE NUMBERS

IN HIS TROUSERS.

AND HE WAS SMELLING
OF THE PERFUME

I'D GIVEN THE NURSES
FOR CHRISTMAS AT THE HOSPITAL.

HE WAS SCREWING
EVERYTHING IN SIGHT

AND MAKING SURE
I KNEW ABOUT IT.

WE WENT THROUGH
A LONELY HELL,

BUT WE STUCK IT OUT,
THANK GOD.

LARRY RESPONDED
TO JO DUMPING ON HIM

THE SAME WAY MARTIN DID

TO HIS INABILITY
TO MAKE A KID.

EVERY NIGHT HE BROUGHT
A DIFFERENT BIMBO

TO OUR HOUSE
FOR DINNER,

WHO LOOKED AT HIM
WITH GAGA EYES.

YOU KNOW,

SOMETIMES I THINK ALL
THAT TERRIFIC MALE EQUIPMENT

JUST HANGS THERE
BY A THREAD.

[PRACTICING CELLO]

HEY, MOM.

HI, HONEY.

COULD I HAVE
A GLASS OF MILK?

AND A COOKIE?

OR TWO?

I HAD A FEW
MORE THINGS TO SAY.

HOW DID YOU
GET IN?

I RANG THE DOORBELL.
PETEY LET ME IN.

YOU ARE A SHIT...

INVOLVING HIM
IN OUR AFFAIRS.

BETH.

BETH...

I'M A SHIT,

BUT SOMEHOW I'VE
GOT TO PROVE TO YOU

THAT I AM A SHIT
IN LOVE WITH YOU.

HEAR ME OUT.

IF YOU STILL DON'T
WANT TO SEE ME,

I PROMISE I'LL NEVER
BOTHER YOU AGAIN.

I REALIZE
I'VE BEEN IMPOSSIBLE...

EVEN TELLING YOU IN BED
THAT I WASN'T IN LOVE.

THAT'S UNFORGIVABLE.

WATCH OUT.
YOU'RE LOSING GROUND.

BUT DON'T YOU SEE?

SWEETHEART,
NO MATTER WHAT I SAID,

I ACTED
LIKE A MAN IN LOVE.

OTHERWISE,
YOU WOULDN'T HAVE
CONTINUED THE AFFAIR.

PETEY,
KNOCK IT OFF!

PEOPLE ARE
TRYING TO SLEEP.

NOW THE TOUGH PART.

ALL I BRING TO YOU
ARE ROTTEN ODDS,

A LACK OF CONFIDENCE,

BASED ON A ROTTEN
BATTING AVERAGE
AS A HUSBAND.

AND WITH THESE GIFTS...

I'M ASKING FOR
YOUR HAND IN MARRIAGE.

THAT'S THE DAMNEDEST PROPOSAL
ANY WOMAN EVER HAD.

LAWRENCE LIVINGSTONE,
DO YOU TAKE BETH GOODWIN

TO BE YOUR LAWFUL WEDDED WIFE,
TO HAVE AND TO HOLD,

TO CHERISH
TILL DEATH DO YOU PART?

I DO.

HYAAH!

THAT'S NICE.

SO YOU DECIDED
TO HAVE NOTHING MORE
TO DO WITH MUSICIANS?

I'M ON BETH'S
SIDE OF THE FAMILY.

I'M HER AUNT MATILDA.

WELL, NOT EXACTLY.

LISTEN, EVERYBODY.
WE HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT TO MAKE.

TEAR UP THE MARRIAGE PAPER.
BETH HAS CHANGED HER MIND.

SHE WILL MARRY ME.

WHAT'S A WOMAN'S LIFE
WITHOUT A GREAT CONDUCTOR?

SHRINKS YOU CAN
RENT BY THE HOUR.

I'M A FRIEND.
I INTRODUCED THEM.

YOU ARE LARRY'S
BROTHER'S WIFE?

DANA.

YOU'RE THE NURSE.

IT'S SO GREAT TO SEE
YOU TWO GUYS TOGETHER.

I CAN'T TELL YOU.

SOMETIMES I WANTED
TO BASH YOUR HEADS TOGETHER.

YES?

UH-OH. I'M SUPPOSED
TO MINGLE.

COME ON!

[ARF! ARF!]

YOU'LL BE HAPPY THIS TIME.
I FEEL IT IN MY BONES.

I SHOULD HAVE CONSULTED
THOSE BONES THE FIRST TIME.

BETH'S GOT HER TWO FEET
ON THE GROUND.

WHERE DO YOU EXPECT
TO FIND THEM?

YOU ALWAYS MAKE A JOKE.

I WAS BETH'S AUNT
BY MARRIAGE--

THAT IS,
THE FIRST MARRIAGE.

HOW DID YOU
AND FRED MEET?

WE MET IN ENGLAND.

YOUR MOTHER IS DOING
HER BEST OUT THERE
IN ARIZONA.

IT'S JUST THAT
SHE FINDS IT DIFFICULT

TO MAKE NEW FRIENDS.

SHE'S TOO PROUD.

HE WAS TEACHING HISTORY AT
THE AMERICAN SCHOOL THERE.

I THOUGHT HE'D
BECOME A PROFESSOR

AT A MAJOR UNIVERSITY,

BUT LIFE NEVER TURNS OUT
THE WAY YOU EXPECT.

I THINK I SHOULD HAVE
PROTECTED YOU MORE.

WHEN YOU GET MY AGE,

YOU THINK ABOUT
THINGS LIKE THAT.

YOU SEE, I WAS, UM...
PETER'S--

PETER WAS
BETH'S FIRST HUSBAND.

UH...

I WAS PETER'S
MOTHER'S SISTER.

SO THAT MAKES ME, UH...

WHAT DOES THAT MAKE ME?

[CLINKS GLASS]

I'D LIKE TO TOAST
THE HAPPY COUPLE.

HA HA!

WHEN I LOOK
AT THAT BIG LUMMOX,

I'M STILL AMAZED
THAT THAT'S MY LARRY,

THE FAMILY RUNT.

REMEMBER, MAMA?

UH-HUH.

LARRY, ON HIS 14th
BIRTHDAY, WAS SMALL

AND, UH...

BEARDLESS,

WITH A VOICE
HIGHER THAN HIS MOTHER'S.
REMEMBER, MAMA?

RIGHT. BUT WHAT
HE REALLY WANTS TO SAY

IS HERE'S TO THE BRIDE
AND GROOM.

MY VERY WORDS.

THANKS, DAD.

KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS
IN LONDON,

WHERE YOU GUYS
CAME FROM?

WHAT?

11:30.

It's five hours
past your bedtime.

That's why
you're so tired.

SARAH WROTE OUT SOME THINGS
FOR ME TO SAY.

I STUDIED THEM,
BUT I FORGOT.

HA HA!

HA HA!

HOW WONDERFUL IT IS

TO SEE HAPPINESS
IN THIS HOUSE.

WELL, IT'S TIME
FOR THE COMIC RELIEF.

EVERYONE KNOWS THAT
I'M CRAZY ABOUT FAMILIES.

I DON'T KNOW WHY.

MAYBE BECAUSE
I NEVER HAD ONE.

ALL THE FAMILIES
IN THE ORPHANAGE
WERE ON TELEVISION.

THIS IS
COMIC RELIEF?

THIS IS A WARM-UP.

MARTIN, PLEASE.

YOU'RE NOT ACCEPTING
AN AWARD.

I'M TRYING TO MAKE
A TOAST TO MARRIAGE.

AFTER 20 YEARS
OF BEING MARRIED,

SIDNEY FINALLY GIVES
IT HER APPROVAL.

DON'T WORRY. I WON'T GIVE IT
AN ALL-OUT RAVE.

MARTIN AND I HAVE BEEN SLEEPING
IN THE SAME BED SO LONG

THAT WE DON'T REMEMBER
THE NEXT MORNING

WHAT WE DID
THE NIGHT BEFORE...OR IF.

IT'S LIKE DRIVING
THE SAME PLACE EVERY DAY.

YOU GET THERE,
BUT YOU DON'T REMEMBER DRIVING.

BUT AFTERWARDS,
WHEN WE CURL UP...

I WOULDN'T TRADE THAT KNEE
INSIDE THE CURVE OF MINE

FOR ANYONE'S.

WHAT CAN I WISH YOU,
MY DEAR OLD FRIENDS?

HALF THE HAPPINESS
THEIR MARRIAGE
HAS GIVEN YOU.

YES. THAT'S GOOD.

THAT'S TRUE.

♪ SHOULD AULD ACQUAINTANCE
BE FORGOT ♪

♪ AND NEVER BROUGHT-- ♪

IT'S NOT
NEW YEAR'S EVE.

MARTIN, SHUT UP.
SING. IT DOESN'T MATTER.

EVERYBODY SING.

♪ SHOULD AULD ACQUAINTANCE
BE FORGOT ♪

♪ FOR THE SAKE
OF AULD LANG SYNE ♪♪

WHAT CAN I SAY
AT THIS HISTORIC MOMENT,

AS THE FIRST RECIPIENT
OF A WEDDING BAGEL

IN THE LONG ROMANTIC
CHRONICLE OF MAN?

NOW THAT YOU'RE MARRIED,

YOU'RE KISSING ME--
THE STORY OF MY LIFE.

IF IT DOESN'T WORK OUT,

YOU KNOW WHERE
TO FIND ME.

EH?

THE BRIDE AND GROOM
SEPARATED BY A HOLE

THEY'RE ABOUT
TO FALL THROUGH.

TALK ABOUT
YOUR AVERAGE SYMBOL.

I JUST LEFT ONE
VERY HAPPY HUSBAND

IN THE CAFETERIA.

ONLY TONIGHT HE GETS HIT
BY HIS NEW FAMILY.

ARE YOU REFERRING
TO MY FAVORITE GODCHILDREN?

THE DIFFERENCE
BETWEEN THE FIRST
AND SECOND HONEYMOON

IS ON
THE SECOND ONE,

YOU THINK A LOT
ABOUT YOUR KIDS.

THINK...

OR WORRY?

WHO WORRIES YOU
THE MOST?

CATHY, I SUPPOSE.

WHEN PETER WAS ALIVE,

SHE PRAYED
EVERY NIGHT TO GOD.

I GUESS IT WAS MORE
OF A NEGOTIATION.

SHE WOULD BE
THE BEST LITTLE GIRL
IN THE WORLD...

IF HE WOULD FIX
HER DADDY'S HAND
AND MAKE HIM HAPPY.

THEN HE LET HER DADDY
KILL HIMSELF.

ONE DADDY GONE

AND ONE PERFECT
LITTLE GIRL WHO TAKES IT

AS HER FAILURE.

NOT THAT PETEY'S
ANY DIFFERENT.

I SUSPECT HE THINKS

THAT IF HE'D ONLY
PRACTICED MORE,

HIS FATHER WOULD
NEVER HAVE DIED.

AND YOU?

ME?

I AM THE ONE
WHO FAILED.

FROM THE TIME YOU WERE 20,

YOU GAVE HIM
ALMOST EVERY WAKING MOMENT
OF YOUR LIFE.

WHAT COULD YOU HAVE DONE
THAT YOU DIDN'T DO?

HMM?

YOU WOULDN'T BE THIS HAPPY
IF PETER WERE ALIVE.

IT'S ALL RIGHT.
IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT.

HOW DOES LARRY FEEL
ABOUT THE KIDS?

THEY'RE NOT HIS PROBLEM.

AND IS THAT
WHY YOU CAME HERE
TO TALK TO ME?

TO PROTECT LARRY
FROM YOUR KIDS?

THE WAY YOU
PROTECTED PETER.

THAT'S MY JOB.

I ONLY WISH
I'D DONE IT BETTER.

I WISH YOU COULD BE
MORE FORGIVING OF YOURSELF.

MIGHT SET A GOOD EXAMPLE
FOR THE KIDS.

TOUGH WORK
BEING HAPPY, HUH?

LARRY, YOUR SOCKS
ARE IN THE TOP LEFT DRAWER.

YOUR UNDERSHIRTS AND
UNDERPANTS ARE IN THE TOP--

SLOW DOWN, GIRL.
NOW, WHERE ARE MY SOCKS?

TOP RIGHT.

TOP RIGHT. YES?

YOUR SWEATERS
ARE ON THE TOP SHELF.

TOP SHELF,
SWEATERS.

I PUT YOUR TOOTHBRUSH
ON THE RIGHT.

MINE IS ON THE LEFT.

OH! I WANT THE LEFT!

BUT THAT'S MINE!
THAT'S MY SIDE!

YOU KNOW THAT.
YOU'RE DOING THIS ON PURPOSE.

SO SOCKS ON THE LEFT--

OH!

PETER SAID THIS TIE RACK
WAS DESIGNED BY SOMEONE

WHO'D NEVER WORN A TIE.

I'LL GET A NEW ONE.

DOES IT BOTHER YOU
LIVING HERE?

IF IT DOES, WE'LL MOVE.

IT'S JUST THAT--

NO. IT REPRESENTS
SECURITY TO THE KIDS.

IT BOTHERS ME A BIT.

I'LL START LOOKING.

SWEETHEART.

WE HAVE BEEN MARRIED
BARELY TWO WEEKS,

AND YOU'RE ALREADY STUCK
BETWEEN YOUR HUSBAND
AND YOUR KIDS.

LARRY, DONNIE
WANTS TO SAY GOOD-BYE.

I'LL BE DOWN
IN A SEC.

HE WANTS TO
SHOW YOU OFF.

HE'S SO PROUD
TO HAVE A FATHER.

AND ABOUT MOVING.
LET'S GIVE IT
A LITTLE TIME.

WHERE'D YOU GET
THOSE JEANS? MMM!

[TELEPHONE
RINGING]

GEORGE,
STOP BEING OBNOXIOUS.

THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

I JUST SMELL ALL WRONG
TO HIS LOYAL CANINE NOSE.

NIGHT, DONNIE.

NIGHT.

NIGHT, JACKIE O.

I LOVE YOU FOR
BELIEVING IN ME.

I HAVE TO GO. BYE.

WHY IS IT EVERY TIME
JACKIE LOOKS AT ME

I FEEL MY FLY'S OPEN?

IT'S THE GIGGLES.

SHE'S STARTED
DOING IT WITH ME.

I KNOW WHAT IT IS.

WE JUST GOT MARRIED.

SO?

WE'RE DOING IT.

DOING WHAT?

A MAN AND A WOMAN
HER PARENTS' AGE

ARE DOING IT.

I CAN'T BELIEVE
THAT'S WHAT IT IS.

OH.

WHAT A COZY LITTLE PLACE
TO HIDE OUT FROM THE WORLD.

OH.

OH!

UH! UH!

HMM?
A LITTLE QUICKIE?

HERE?

YEAH.

ONLY IF YOU DO IT.

YES.

OH, GOD.

OH.

NOT WHILE THE CHILDREN
ARE STILL AWAKE.

AND SO
FAMILY LIFE BEGINS.

EEYAH.

NO MORE GETTING UP
AT 2:30 IN THE MORNING.

WHO WAS THAT
ON THE PHONE?

IT WAS BRONIE.

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

[RING]

IT'S THE OPPORTUNITY
OF A LIFETIME.

YOU'RE BEHAVING
LIKE A HOUSEWIFE
WITH A HOBBY.

THIS IS LARRY.
WHAT'S GOING ON?

LET ME HAVE IT.

LIFE WANTS
TO HIRE HER

TO PHOTOGRAPH
MY TOUR OF RUSSIA.

LOOK, BRONIE, I DON'T KNOW
WHAT'S GOING ON,

BUT WHATEVER IT IS,

WE'LL CALL YOU BACK
IN THE MORNING.

THIS IS
MY FIRST TIME
BACK IN RUSSIA.

I NEED
ALL THE SECURITY
I CAN GET.

DON'T WE ALL?

YOU CERTAINLY
HAVE STRANGE IDEAS

ABOUT WHAT'S
NOT IMPORTANT.

ONLY THE OPPORTUNITY
OF YOUR LIFE.

I THOUGHT THAT'S
WHAT OUR MARRIAGE WAS.

WHY SHOULD ONE
PREVENT THE OTHER?

LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING...

AS A PSYCHIATRIST.

UH-OH.

A WOMAN TELLS YOU
THAT HER BRAND-NEW HUSBAND

WAS SO BURNED
BY HIS FIRST WIFE

THAT HE SWORE
HE'D NEVER TAKE ANOTHER.

NOW THE WEDDING BAND
BARELY ON HER FINGER,

SHE PLANS
TO DITCH HIM FOR A MONTH.

HOW WOULD YOU
ADVISE HER?

WATCH OUT FOR ME.

LOVE ME, AND I'LL BE
A NEEDY, GREEDY BASTARD

WHO'LL GOBBLE UP
YOUR LIFE.

I CAN HANDLE THAT.

I KNOW. YOU DID IT
ONCE BEFORE.

DON'T BLAME PETER.

HE CAN'T TALK BACK.

[PLAYING SCALES]

HE'LL PRACTICE ALL NIGHT
IF I DON'T STOP HIM.

LET ME
TAKE CARE OF THIS, OK?

HEY. YOU REALLY
NEEDED THIS.

YOU DON'T KNOW
HOW MUCH.

OK. PUT YOUR HEAD
DOWN NOW.

[GRR!]

YOU'RE THE FIRST ONE
I LIKED.

ALL THE OTHERS WOULD
SUCK UP TO ME AND CATHY.

THEY WERE JUST
TRYING TO IMPRESS MOM.

I GLAD YOU GAVE THEM
THE HEAVE-HO.

LARRY?

HMM?

WHAT ARE YOU DOING
APRIL 23rd AT 3 P.M.?

APRIL 23rd, 3 P.M.?

IT'S FATHER-SON DAY
AT SCHOOL.

THE FATHERS PLAY BASEBALL
WITH THE SONS.

YOU PLAN AHEAD.

YOU'LL GO?

IF YOU DON'T MIND
A FUMBLER FOR A STEPDAD.

LARRY?

HMM?

I'M GLAD I'M NOT
GOING AWAY TO SCHOOL.

AH, ME, TOO, PAL.

DON'T SHUT IT
ALL THE WAY.

HOW'S THIS?

A LITTLE LESS.

A LITTLE MORE.

THAT'S RIGHT. THANKS.

OK. NIGHT-NIGHT.

I HARDLY
RECOGNIZE MYSELF.

YOU MADE ME
LOOK SO GOOD.

WHOA.

WELL...

I GOT TO
HIT THE SACK MYSELF.

NIGHT-NIGHT, NOW.

YOU, TOO.

♪ SEE YOU IN THE MORNIN',
SEE YOU IN THE EVENIN' ♪

♪ SEE YOU
IN THE SUMMERTIME ♪

♪ DA DA DA DA DA ♪♪

[SIREN]

DADDY?

FORGIVE ME.
IT'S JUST ME.

IT'S LARRY.

OH.

UM, I'M SORRY.

I DIDN'T MEAN
TO FRIGHTEN YOU.

YOU DIDN'T FRIGHTEN ME.

I COULDN'T SLEEP.

I WAS COMING IN
TO UNPACK MY BOOKS.

DON'T TELL MOM.

HEY, I BET YOU
USED TO COME IN HERE
AT NIGHT

TO BE NEAR YOUR DAD
WHILE HE WAS WORKING.

YOU'D FALL ASLEEP,

AND YOU'D WAKE UP
IN HIS ARMS.

HE'D CARRY YOU TO BED.

HOW'D YOU KNOW?

I DID THAT WITH ROBIN.

WHEN I WOKE UP
AND YOU WEREN'T THERE,

I GOT FRIGHTENED.

I WANT TO MOVE.

I THINK
IN THE LONG RUN

IT'LL BE BETTER
FOR THE KIDS.

THIS IS
THEIR FATHER'S HOUSE.

IT WILL ALWAYS BE
THEIR FATHER'S HOUSE.

AND I'M NOT
THEIR FATHER.

ONE OTHER THING.

THIS TRIP TO RUSSIA.

UM...

YOU'RE 36 YEARS OLD.

DON'T YOU THINK IT'S TIME
YOU DID SOMETHING FOR YOURSELF?

THESE ARE
SUGGESTED MENUS

FOR THE DAYS
I'LL BE AWAY.

THIS LISTS EVERYTHING
IN THE FREEZER.

CATHY'S FAVORITE FOODS
ARE STARRED.

DON'T EXPECT
THAT SHE'LL EAT THEM.

IMPORTANT NUMBERS--

DR. LIVINGSTONE'S
OFFICE,

THE DOCTOR,
THE DENTIST,
THE NEAREST HOSPITAL,

CATHY
AND PETEY'S SCHOOLS,
THE MARKET,

THE MANAGER'S OFFICE
AT THE PHILHARMONIC.

THEY'LL ALWAYS
KNOW WHERE I AM.

OLGA,
HOW CAN I THANK YOU
FOR STAYING?

THE REAL ESTATE AGENT

WILL CALL
DR. LIVINGSTONE'S
OFFICE

WHEN SHE'S SHOWING
THE HOUSE.

BE SURE THE CHILDREN
ARE IN SCHOOL THEN.

THEY'LL FIND OUT
SOMETIME,
SWEETHEART.

DARLING, IT COULD BE MONTHS
BEFORE IT SELLS.

THE CHILDREN
WILL BE MORE SETTLED.

I HADN'T COUNTED ON

CATHY'S FANTASY
ABOUT GOING WITH ME.

I SHOULDN'T HAVE
LET HER GET SO CLOSE TO ME.

YOU CAN'T
SPEND YOUR LIFE

IN BONDAGE
TO YOUR GUILT.

DO YOU WANT TO BET?

HA HA HA!

[MUSIC PLAYING]

GOOD-BYE, CATHY.

SHE'S GOTTEN
THIS CRAZY IDEA

THAT IF SHE DOESN'T EAT,
SHE'LL LOOK LIKE ME.

I WANTED BIG BREASTS
LIKE MY MOTHER,

AND SHE WANTS
SMALL BREASTS
LIKE HER MOTHER.

SOMEBODY UP THERE'S
GOT A SENSE OF HUMOR.

WHAT DID I FORGET?

DO YOU WANT
TO MISS YOUR PLANE?

BYE.

OH, SWEETHEART.

I'LL BE BACK
BEFORE YOU KNOW IT.

BYE-BYE, SWEETHEART.

♪ DA DA DA DA DA ♪

♪ GIVE MY REGARDS
TO TOLSTOY ♪

♪ REMEMBER ME
TO OLD RED SQUARE ♪♪

HEY!

MOM. MOM!

STOP!
WAIT, MOTHER.

YOU LEFT YOUR PASSPORT
AND YOUR GLASSES

ON THE TABLE.

I'LL KEEP AN EYE
ON PETEY FOR YOU.

I'LL MISS YOU.

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

[KNOCK KNOCK]

WHAT IS IT?

LARRY,
PETEY'S SICK.

[COUGHING]

HALLELUJAH.

YOU'RE DOWN
TO NORMAL.

STILL THINK
YOU OUGHT TO
STAY HOME,

JUST TO BE
ON THE SAFE SIDE.

OLGA'S
GOT THE DAY OFF.

MAYBE I CAN CANCEL
SOME APPOINTMENTS.

I DON'T MIND
BEING ALONE.

NIGHT-NIGHT, NOW.

I'M SORRY
FOR RUINING YOUR SLEEP.

THIS IS AN ADVENTURE.

I LOVE ADVENTURES.

LARRY?

HMM?

I LOVE YOU.

I LOVE YOU, TOO, PAL.

[HUMMING]

[DOOR CLOSES]

[DOG BARKS]

OH, DEAR.

OH!

THANK YOU.

YOU HOME FROM SCHOOL
WITH A COLD?

WHO ARE YOU?

I'M SHOWING THE HOUSE.

HOW DID YOU
GET IN?

YOUR DADDY'S SECRETARY
GAVE ME THE KEY.

ISN'T THIS A PERFECT
CHILD'S ROOM?

LOOK AT
THE STORAGE SPACE.

THERE MUST BE
SOME SORT OF MISTAKE.

WE'LL BE OUT
OF YOUR HAIR SOON.

THIS HOUSE
IS NOT FOR SALE!

[ARF ARF]

I LOVE YOU, TOO.

[CELLO PLAYS]

WHAT'S WRONG?

THERE WAS
A WOMAN HERE TODAY.

SHE SAID YOU WERE
GOING TO SELL THE HOUSE.

THAT'S NOT POSSIBLE.

SHE SAID YOUR SECRETARY
GAVE HER THE KEY.

OH.

IT'S NOT YOUR HOUSE.

I KNOW.

I KNOW
IT'S NOT MY HOUSE.

PETEY--

DOES MOM KNOW?

YOUR MOTHER
AND I THOUGHT--

I THOUGHT

SINCE WE'RE STARTING
A NEW LIFE AS A FAMILY,

IT WOULD BE GOOD
TO START IT IN A NEW PLACE,

A PLACE THAT BELONGED
TO ALL OF US.

YOU CAN'T LET STRANGERS
LIVE IN DADDY'S HOUSE.

IF ROBIN AND BILLY'S MOTHER
FINDS A NEW HUSBAND,

WOULD IT BE FAIR

TO MAKE HIM LIVE
IN MY OLD HOUSE FOREVER?

THAT'S DIFFERENT.

YOU'RE DIVORCED.

AYY.

THANK YOU, GOD,
FOR SPORTS.

[CELLO PLAYS]

LARRY?

PETEY SAID
WE WERE MOVING.

WELL...

WE HAVE BEEN
THINKING ABOUT IT.

NOTHING DEFINITE
YET, BUT...

WHY DIDN'T MOM TELL ME?

SHE DIDN'T WANT
TO WORRY YOU

ABOUT SOMETHING THAT
HASN'T HAPPENED.

BUT WE ALWAYS
TALK THINGS OVER.

SHE TRUSTED ME.

[CLICK]

[MUSIC PLAYS]

[THUNDER]

SORRY I'M SO LATE.

WE DON'T KNOW
WHERE PETEY IS.

I'VE CALLED HIS FRIENDS.
NOBODY'S SEEN HIM.

THIS STORM
HAS PARALYZED THE CITY.

HE ALWAYS
CHECKS IN WITH ME.

HE'S OBSESSIVELY
ON TIME.

WHAT TIME
WAS HE DUE HOME?

AT 5:00!

IT'S AFTER 9:00.

I THINK WE SHOULD
CALL THE POLICE.

[DOOR OPENS]

HE'S HOME.

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?

YOU HAD US WORRIED SICK.

[SPEAKING RUSSIAN]

I'M SORRY.

THE BUS I WAS SUPPOSED TO TAKE
STOPPED RUNNING.

THE IMPORTANT THING
IS THAT YOU'RE SAFE.

THE NEXT IMPORTANT THING

IS TO GET
INTO A HOT BATH.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S WRONG,
BUT IN 30 MINUTES

WE WOULD HAVE HAD
THE ENTIRE POLICE FORCE

AFTER YOU.

THEY HAVE BETTER THINGS
TO DO THAN LOOK FOR ME.

DON'T MOVE UNTIL
YOU TELL ME WHERE YOU'VE BEEN.

KNOCK IT OFF.

YOU'VE GOT NO RIGHT
TO TORMENT HIM
BECAUSE HE'S LATE.

HI.

IT WAS RIGHT AFTER
I MET YOU

AND STARTED UP GROUP

THAT I STARTED
GOING OUT WITH THIS GUY.

THIS SATURDAY,
HE ADMITTED TO ME

THAT HE'S BEEN
SEEING HER
FOR 1 1/2 WEEKS.

I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN
TRUST SOMEONE AGAIN.

HOW LONG HAVE YOU
BEEN SEEING HIM?

FIVE WEEKS.

HE'S TRUSTWORTHY,
LOVING, AND CARING.

YOU'VE BEEN SEEING HIM
FOR FIVE WEEKS.

YES, BUT EVERY DAY.

HONEY, WHAT ABOUT
YOUR LIFE?

WHAT?

IN HERE, I'M ALWAYS
HEARING ABOUT YOU
AND THIS MAN,

YOU AND THAT MAN,

YOU AND THE MAN
BEFORE THAT.

I MEAN,
WHAT DO YOU DO?

DO YOU HAVE A LIFE?
SERIOUSLY.

DO YOU HAVE A LIFE?

YES. I HAVE A LIFE.

IS IT
DEPENDENT UPON A MAN?

NO.

BUT IT IS!

I HAVE MY CAREER
AS A TEACHER.

I'M TALKING
ABOUT SOMEONE YOU TRUST

AND PUT YOUR FAITH IN.

WHEN DID
YOUR FATHER LEAVE?

I DON'T WANT
TO GO INTO THE PAST.

I'M TALKING ABOUT
SOMETHING NOW.

WHEN DID
YOUR FATHER LEAVE HOME?

HOW OLD WERE YOU?

I WAS BORN.
THAT'S WHEN HE LEFT.

DID YOU EVER THINK
YOU'RE REPEATING

A PATTERN HERE?

CAN YOU STOP HER FROM
BEING THE PSYCHIATRIST?

I'M NOT TRYING
TO BE THE PSYCHIATRIST,

BUT I'VE BEEN LISTENING
TO THE SAME BULLSHIT

FOR THE PAST SIX WEEKS.

THIS IS THE SAME THING
WOMEN ARE ALWAYS DOING.

WHY IS THEIR
OWN HAPPINESS

REFLECTED IN
THEIR RELATIONSHIP
WITH SOMEBODY ELSE?

IT SEEMS
THAT EVERY TIME--

NO. STOP THAT!

THEY WANT TO GRAB YOU.

HAVE YOU BEEN
LISTENING TO ME

FOR THE LAST
SIX WEEKS?

I DON'T WANT A MAN
CONTROLLING ME.

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

EXCUSE ME. YEAH?

SORRY TO BOTHER YOU.

YOUR STEPDAUGHTER
CATHY CALLED.

SHE'S BEEN PICKED UP
BY THE POLICE

FOR SHOPLIFTING
AT BLOOMINGDALE'S.

BLOOMINGDALE'S.

BLOOMINGDALE'S?

THERE'S AN EMERGENCY.
I MUST LEAVE.

YOU'VE GOT
AN EMERGENCY?

BYE.

GREAT.

YOUR FATHER'S HERE.

[ARF ARF ARF]

DON'T YOU THINK
WE SHOULD TALK?

PLEASE...

NOT RIGHT NOW.

HUMOR ME A LITTLE.

YOU'VE BEEN UNDER

A LOT OF PRESSURE
LATELY.

LIKE WHAT?

FOR ONE, YOUR MOTHER
JUST REMARRIED.

SO?

I KNOW HOW MUCH
SHE'S DEPENDED ON YOU

SINCE YOUR FATHER DIED.

NOW HERE I COME AND...

AND, YOU MIGHT SAY,

TRY TO TAKE
YOUR PLACE.

JUST WHEN YOU THINK
YOU'RE AN ADULT,

YOU'RE EXPECTED
TO TURN BACK INTO
A CHILD.

TO MAKE IT WORSE,

YOU'RE TOLD
YOU'RE VERY LUCKY.

DON'T GIVE ME EXCUSES.

I KNOW I HAVE NO RIGHT

TO ASK
FOR ANYTHING, BUT...

COULD YOU PLEASE
NOT TELL MOM

UNTIL SHE COMES BACK?

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

[RING]

IT'S MRS. LIVINGSTONE.

FROM RUSSIA?

NO. IT IS THE OTHER ONE.

JO?

LARRY, WE'RE IN MAINE.

WE ALL FLEW IN
FROM LONDON LAST NIGHT.

IT'S NEENIE,
HER HEART AGAIN.

THE DOCTOR SAID
IT'S JUST GIVING OUT.

OH.

BETH'S AWAY.

HOW MUCH TIME
HAVE I GOT?

WELL, THEY SAID
IT COULD BE WEEKS

OR IT COULD BE DAYS.

SHE SAID, "I'M NOT GOING
TILL I GET GOOD AND READY."

CAN I SPEAK TO
ROBIN AND BILLY?

MORTY TOOK THEM OUT
TO A MOVIE.

WELL, THANK MORTY FOR ME

FOR, UH, BEING NICE
TO MY KIDS.

[PLAYING PIANO]

I KNOW, GEORGE.

IT'S NOT MY ROOM.

THIS IS NOT MY HOUSE...

THESE AREN'T MY KIDS,

AND YOU...

ARE NOT MY DOG.

SO, WHAT THE HELL
AM I DOING HERE?

WELL...

THIS IS GOING TO BE HARD
FOR YOU TO UNDERSTAND, GEORGE.

YOU'RE SO MONOGAMOUS--

ONE MASTER, ONE MISTRESS,
ONE FAMILY.

NOW ME, ONE INTERLOPER.

YOU SEE, GEORGE,

HUMAN BEINGS ARE PLAYING
A LOT OF MUSICAL CHAIRS,

MUSICAL HOUSES,
MUSICAL FAMILIES--

THAT'S THE NAME
OF THE GAME.

I'M IN
YOUR MASTER'S CHAIR.

A GUY NAMED MORTY
IS IN MY CHAIR.

SOME OTHER GUY IS MOST LIKELY
IN MORTY'S CHAIR.

MORTY'S GOT A CHAIR...

AND A FAMILY...

WHICH DOESN'T MATTER
BECAUSE...

NOW HE'S GOT MY CHAIR
AND MY FAMILY.

SO WHO'S ON WHOSE CHAIR?

NO.

WHO IS ON WHAT'S CHAIR.
WHAT IS ON WHOSE CHAIR.

WE ALL HIT HOME RUNS.

WE WOUND UP
IN SOMEONE ELSE'S HOME.

WE'RE ALL OUT...

IN THE COLD.

THERE'S A MORAL
TO ALL THIS, GEORGE.

NEVER MIX YOUR FAMILIES
OR YOUR METAPHORS...

OR YOUR DRINKS.

ANY OTHER QUESTIONS?

[WHIMPERING]

SOMEBODY LOVES ME--

GEORGE.

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

HELLO?

SWEETHEART!

AH, DARLING,
WHAT A SURPRISE.

I HOPE
I'M NOT WAKING YOU.

NO. NO.

HOW'S MOTHER RUSSIA?

FINE. HOW'S
EVERYTHING THERE?

ARE THE KIDS
ALL RIGHT?

JUST FINE.

OH, GOD!
WHAT A RELIEF!

[ARF]

OH, SWEETHEART...

YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT
YOU'VE DONE FOR ME.

WHAT DID I DO?

I ADORE YOU.

OH, HERE'S BRONIE.

HE'D LIKE
TO SAY HELLO.

LARRY, YOUR WIFE
HAS NEVER LOOKED
MORE BEAUTIFUL.

ALL THE RUSSIANS
ARE MAD ABOUT HER.

IGNORE HIM.

HA HA HA!

I BETTER
PULL TOGETHER
MY EQUIPMENT.

BIG HUG
TO THE KIDS.

OH, DARLING,
IT'S GOING TO
BE SO WONDERFUL

WHEN WE'RE TOGETHER.

GOOD-BYE,
SWEETHEART.

WELL, GEORGE, YOUR MISTRESS
IS THE TOAST OF MOTHER R...

AND FATHER R
AND BROTHER R.

OH, POOR BETHIE...

SHE DOESN'T FEEL

SHE HAS THE RIGHT
TO WORK OR RECOGNITION.

BAD LARRY--MAD BECAUSE
HE CAN'T BE A PART OF IT,

AND NOBLE GEORGE...

WHO KEPT BAD LARRY GOOD,

AT LEAST WHILE
HE WAS ON THE PHONE.

WE'RE QUITE A COMBINATION.

HERE I COME.

EVERYTHING'S
ALL RIGHT, ISN'T IT?

WELL, MORE OR LESS.

OH!

JO'S MOTHER'S DYING.

I'M SORRY.

I KNOW HOW
YOU FELT ABOUT HER.

I HAVE TO GO
TO MAINE THIS AFTERNOON

AND SAY GOOD-BYE.

YOU COULD HAVE
LEFT CATHY AND
PETEY WITH OLGA.

YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO
WAIT FOR ME.

IT WASN'T A PARTICULARLY
GOOD TIME TO GO.

OOH!

YOU ALL RIGHT?

YEAH.

SOMETHING'S WRONG.

NOTHING TO GET
ALARMED ABOUT.

PETEY FOUND OUT
ABOUT THE HOUSE...

MY FUCK-UP.

HE WAS HOME,

AND I FORGOT
TO HEAD OFF THE AGENT.

THAT'S NOT THE END
OF THE WORLD.

WELL, THAT DEPENDS ON
YOUR POINT OF VIEW.

HONEY, STEP BACK
THIS WAY.

IT SEEMS THAT PETEY...

EXPECTS US TO MAINTAIN
THE HOUSE FOREVER,

AS A MEMORIAL
TO HIS FATHER.

THE NEXT NIGHT,

THERE WAS
THIS TERRIBLE THUNDERSTORM.

SORRY.

NO SIGN OF PETEY,

MUCH HYSTERIA
FROM CATHY AND OLGA,

MUCH ACTING
UNHYSTERICAL FROM ME...

BAD ACTING,
I MIGHT ADD.

BUT HE CAME HOME?

DRENCHED TO THE SKIN,
FIVE HOURS LATE,

ENTERED PETEY...

TO BE CONFRONTED
BY A FURIOUS OLDER SISTER

WHO DEMANDED TO KNOW
HIS WHEREABOUTS.

HE REFUSED TO ANSWER
UNDER THE FIFTH AMENDMENT.

SHE TORE INTO
THE LITTLE FELLA

LIKE HE WAS THE GREAT SATAN
AND SHE, THE AYATOLLAH.

ENTER INTO THE BREACH,

THE WISE, NOBLE STEPPARENT

TELLING HER TO MIND HER OWN
FUCKING ADOLESCENT BUSINESS--

OR WORDS TO THAT EFFECT--

FOLLOWED
THE NEXT DAY BY...

JUS--JUST TELL ME
WHAT HAPPENED.

LET'S LOOK
AT THE GOOD SIDE.

SHE GOT ALL As
ON HER REPORT CARD,

EXCEPT FOR
A C+ IN GYM,

AND SHE'S NOT PREGNANT.

DON'T DO THIS
TO ME.

SHE GOT CAUGHT SHOPLIFTING
AT BLOOMINGDALE'S.

SHOPLIFTING?

A $10 PAIR OF EARRINGS.

YOU SHOULD HAVE
TOLD ME.

WHAT?

YOU SHOULD HAVE
TOLD ME, LARRY.

DON'T YOU THINK
I WANTED TO?

I WANTED TO GO TO
THE NEAREST SATELLITE

AND BEAM HELP.

I WAS TRYING
NOT TO REVERT

TO MY BAD, OLD,
SELFISH WAYS.

IT WAS MY FAULT.

I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN
SOMETHING WAS WRONG.

I KNEW SOMETHING
WAS WRONG.

I JUST DIDN'T
WANT TO FACE IT.

SOMETIMES...
I THINK LIFE IS

ONE ENORMOUS PILE
OF FAULTS TO YOU,

AND YOU SPEND
YOUR LIFE

DIVIDING UP
THE PIECES.

ONE FAULT FOR YOU.
ONE FAULT FOR ME.

ONE FOR CATHY.
ONE FOR PETEY.

THREE FAULTS FOR YOU.
TWO FAULTS FOR ME.

OK!

CATHY HAS NOT
MURDERED ANYONE,

NOR, DESPITE
HIS FANTASIES,
HAS PETEY.

AND AT THE RISK
OF SOUNDING
CONTROVERSIAL,

THAT ALSO GOES
FOR THE BOTH OF US.

SO, TELL ME, HOW ARE
THINGS IN RUSSIA?

I'M SORRY.

I'M PUNISHING YOU

BECAUSE I'M ANGRY
AT MYSELF.

SO MUCH FOR
THE OLD STEPPADRE

HOLDING DOWN
THE FORT.

IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT!

LET'S START
AT THE BEGINNING.

HI, SWEETHEART!

SWEETHEART,
WELCOME HOME!

HELLO!

YOU WANT TO KNOW
HOW THE FAMILY IS?

WELL, THERE
ARE A FEW
MINOR PROBLEMS,

BUT NOTHING WE CAN'T
STRAIGHTEN OUT.

JUST KEEP HOLDING ME.

HERE WE ARE, DAD!

NEENIE'S DYING.

OH, I KNOW,
BIG FELLA.

SHE'S JUST BEEN WAITING
FOR A LAST GLIMPSE OF YOU.

THAT'S A GIRL.

OHH!

SHE SAID
DON'T BE SCARED.

AND THEN SHE
GAVE ME ADVICE

ABOUT GROWING UP
INTO A SPECIAL MAN.

THAT'S HER REGRET.

SHE WON'T BE HERE
TO GIVE US ADVICE,

AS IF IT'S DONE US
ANY GOOD.

WHERE'S MORTY?

HE'S IN BOSTON
ON BUSINESS.

HE THOUGHT
IT WOULD BE GOOD

IF SHE SPENT
SOME TIME ALONE
WITH YOU.

YOU TOLD HIM
TO DO THAT.

OH! I DON'T THINK

YOUR SON INHERITED
YOUR DISCRETION.

HERE. I'LL DRIVE,

IF MADAM WAGON
STILL REMEMBERS ME.

IT REMEMBERS YOU, DAD.

EVERYONE REMEMBERS YOU.

MY SON AND PR AGENT
ALL IN ONE.

SHIT! IT'S GOOD
TO SEE YOU.

THE OLD AMBIVALENCE.

WHAT'S AMBIVALENCE?

HAVE YOU EVER
LIKED SOMEBODY

THAT DROVE YOU CRAZY?

ROBIN.

I CAN'T BELIEVE
YOU SAID YOU LIKE HER.

WELL, THAT'S
AMBIVALENCE.

MOMMY FEELS THAT
ABOUT YOU?

MMM...ON A GOOD DAY.

WHY?

OK, NOW, WE'RE NOT PLAYING
TRUTH OR CONSEQUENCES.

NO. WE'RE PLAYING FAMILY.

SO...HOW'S TRICKS?

I'M AFRAID I HAVEN'T
GOT MANY LEFT.

THAT'S NOT LIKE YOU

TO TAKE
A PESSIMISTIC VIEW.

YOU KNOW OUR RULE.

WE HAVE SO MANY.

WITH THE BIG THINGS,
WE DON'T KID.

SOMETHING ODD
JUST HAPPENED.

I WAS DOZING...

AND I WOKE UP
AND SAW YOU

STANDING IN THE DOOR...

AND I THOUGHT
YOU WERE JO'S FATHER.

JO IS LIKE HER FATHER.

SHE'S IN LOVE
WITH MYSTERY.

MARRIAGE ISN'T
VERY GOOD FOR THAT.

NOT THAT I FIND
MORTY VERY MYSTERIOUS.

OH, HE'S
PERFECTLY NICE...

I JUST WISH HE WOULDN'T
CALL ME NEENIE-WEENIE.

I'VE BEEN UNFAIR TO JO.

I WANTED HER TO BE ADORED
BY ALL THE WORLD...

AND I WANTED HER
TO BE THE PERFECT WIFE.

CHILDREN SHOULD BEWARE
UNHAPPY MOTHERS.

HEY, NOW.

I WON'T
LET YOU CRITICIZE

THE WOMAN
OF MY DREAMS.

WHAT'S BETH'S
MOTHER LIKE?

ISN'T THAT AWFUL?

I--I SOUND LIKE
A JEALOUS WOMAN.

I COME BEARING GIFTS.

PRINCES ALWAYS DO.

I THOUGHT YOUR OLD ONE

MIGHT BE WEARING OUT.

EVERYTHING I HAVE
IS WEARING OUT.

THERE YOU ARE,
YOU SEE.

MAGIC BILLY!

WON'T YOU TELL US
A NIBOR YLLIB STORY?

WELL, LET'S SEE.
COME ON.

HERE WE GO!

NIBOR, YLLIB,
AND THEIR DADDY

WENT ON
A TIME MACHINE.

THEIR DADDY BECAME
A WHALING CAPTAIN.

WELL, ONE DAY,

THEY CLIMBED UP
TO THE WIDOW'S WALK,

AND THEIR DADDY HAD
BEEN GONE A LONG TIME,

AND THEY SAW A SPECK
ON THE HORIZON,

AND SUDDENLY,
BILLY--

YLLIB!

YLLIB SAW
A DARK SHAPE

IN THE WAVES.

IT WAS A DOLPHIN,

AND IT SWAM UP
TO THE PIER.

IT LOOKED
AT NIBOR AND YLLIB.

IT LET OUT
A DOLPHIN SHOUT
OF RECOGNITION.

OOOWWW!

HE WAS A SPECIAL
KIND OF DOLPHIN.

HE WAS CALLED
A CARRIER DOLPHIN

BECAUSE HE HAD A POUCH
IN HIS MOUTH,

AND HE USED TO CARRY
LETTERS AND PACKAGES,

AND NOW THE DOLPHIN

WAS GOING TO BE
THE FAMILY PET,

AND THEY WOULD
SEND MESSAGES

BETWEEN THEM
AND THEIR DADDY.

♪ SEE YOU
IN THE MORNING ♪

♪ SEE YOU
IN THE EVENING ♪

♪ SEE YOU
IN THE SUMMERTIME ♪

♪ DOO DOO DOO
DOO DOO DOO ♪♪

♪ AH! SWEET MYSTERY
OF LIFE ♪

♪ AT LAST I'VE FOUND THEE ♪

♪ AH! AT LAST I KNOW ♪

♪ THE SECRET OF IT ALL ♪

♪ ALL THE LONGING, SEEKING ♪

♪ STRIVING, WAITING, YEARNING ♪

♪ THROUGH
ALL THE HOPES AND JOY ♪

♪ AND BURNING TEARS
THAT FALL ♪♪

IT'S COLD OUT HERE.

YOU SHOULD HAVE
YOUR JACKET ON, SWEETIE.

WANT TO SIT
ON DADDY'S LAP, HMM?

COME ON.

I TALKED TO YOUR MOTHER,

AND SHE SAID
THAT YOU AND BILLY

COULD SPEND
ALL EASTER WEEK

WITH BETH AND ME.

YOU ONCE SAID YOU WOULD
ALWAYS BE THERE FOR US

WHEN WE NEEDED YOU.

THAT'S RIGHT.

DADDY?

WHAT, MY LOVE?

I NEED YOU
EVERY NIGHT.

WELL, FROM NOW ON,

I'LL WRITE YOU
EVERY DAY.

YOU MEAN TO, DADDY,
BUT YOU FORGET.

MOMMY TOLD ME

HOW MUCH
MORTY LOVES YOU.

NEW PEOPLE DON'T
MAKE YOU FEEL SAFE

LIKE OLD ONES DO.

WHEN YOU AND MOMMY

TOLD US YOU WERE
GETTING A DIVORCE,

YOU DIDN'T CRY.

YOU DIDN'T EVEN
SEEM SAD.

WE...

WE THOUGHT THAT
BY HIDING OUR PAIN,

IT WOULD MAKE IT
EASIER FOR YOU.

IF IT WAS PAINFUL,

THEN WHY DID YOU
DO IT?

WE CAN TALK ABOUT THAT
WHEN YOU'RE OLDER, OK?

THAT WON'T
HELP ME NOW.

SINCE YOU AND MOMMY
DIDN'T SEEM UPSET,

I TOLD MYSELF THAT
YOU WERE JUST GOING

ON A LONG, LONG TRIP,

AND ONE DAY,
YOU'D COME HOME,

AND WE'D BE A FAMILY
LIKE WE ALWAYS WERE.

BUT, SWEETHEART,
YOU WERE THERE

WHEN BETH AND I
GOT MARRIED.

YOU AND MOMMY
GOT DIVORCED.

WHY COULDN'T
YOU AND BETH?

AND IF YOU FELL
IN LOVE WITH HER,

THEN ONE DAY,

YOU COULD FALL BACK
IN LOVE WITH MOMMY.

OH, I'M SORRY, ROBIN.

I'M SORRY
IF WE LED YOU ON.

NO, IT'S NOT
A GREAT NIGHT FOR SLEEPING.

REMEMBER WHAT YOU SAID
BEFORE WE SEPARATED?

A LOT OF THINGS
I WISH I HADN'T.

YOU SAID
IF WE SEPARATED,

WE'D EVENTUALLY
GET DIVORCED,

AND AFTER GOING THROUGH
A ROTTEN PATCH,

WE'D EACH FIND
SOMEONE ELSE

AND WIND UP HAPPY.

AND IF WE STAYED TOGETHER,

WE'D GO THROUGH
A ROTTEN PATCH,

AND EVENTUALLY
WE'D MAKE IT THROUGH...

STILL TOGETHER...

HAPPY.

BUT LOOK AT ALL THE MESS
WE WOULD HAVE SAVED.

I REMEMBER
WHAT YOU SAID

AFTER WE'D BEEN
SEPARATED FOR A WHILE.

YOU SAID
YOU WERE REASSURED

MEN STILL FOUND YOU
SO ATTRACTIVE--

SOME ROTTEN PATCH.

SOMETIMES I WISH I WOULD
HAVE FOLLOWED YOUR ADVICE.

YOU'RE JUST
FEELING VULNERABLE
BECAUSE OF NEENIE.

WHAT IF THAT'S
NOT ALL IT IS?

THERE'S A PART OF ME
THAT'S ALWAYS LOVED YOU.

YOU REMEMBER THE NIGHT
BILLY WAS CONCEIVED?

WE HAD THAT FIGHT...

AND I CAME UP HERE
TO GET AWAY FROM YOU.

I FELL ASLEEP,

AND WHEN I WOKE UP...

YOU WERE KISSING ME.

WITHOUT THAT FIGHT,

THERE WOULDN'T BE
A BILLY.

NO MORE GAMES.

HI. I MADE IT.

I'M SO SORRY
ABOUT YOUR MOM.

DID YOU GET UP THERE
BY YOURSELF?

HI, ROBIN.
HI, BILLY.

HOW ARE YOU?

LARRY,
GOOD TO SEE YOU.

DADDY!

YOU NEVER TOLD US
THE DOLPHIN'S NAME.

CARING.

YOUR DADDY NAMED
THE DOLPHIN CARING.

I HAVE GOT
A SURPRISE FOR YOU,

BUT YOU WILL
HAVE TO FIND IT

BECAUSE IT'S
IN ME POCKET.

I BROUGHT IT ALL THE WAY
FROM ENGLAND.

WHICH POCKET IS IT IN?
THIS ONE.

I'LL HOLD HIM!

HI, GEORGE.

YOU FEELING
ALL RIGHT, GEORGE?

TALK ABOUT MALE BONDING.

YOU'VE ONLY BEEN GONE
THREE DAYS,

AND GEORGE
CAN'T BREATHE.

CAN A DOG
GET EMPHYSEMA?

ONLY IF HE SMOKES.

LOOK AT THAT.

I'M SORRY.
I KNOW HOW MUCH
SHE MEANT TO YOU.

OH, THAT OLD GIRL.

SHE HUNG IN
JUST LONG ENOUGH
TO WAVE GOOD-BYE.

HOW ARE ROBIN
AND BILLY?

OH, THEY'RE ROLLING
WITH THE PUNCHES.

AND THE PUNCHES
KEEP ROLLING IN.

I'VE MADE A LIST
OF REQUIREMENTS

FOR OUR NEW APARTMENT.

YOU MAY BE THE CHAMPION
LISTMAKER OF THE WORLD.

NUMBER ONE,

WE HAVE TO HAVE
A BILLY/ROBIN ROOM.

THEY HAVE TO KNOW
THERE'S A PLACE FOR THEM

INSIDE THEIR FATHER'S HOUSE
WHERE THEY BELONG.

I GET
THIS AWFUL FEELING

I'LL START BAWLING
LIKE A KID.

IT'S ALLOWED.

WE'RE MARRIED.

I HAD THIS NUTSY MOMENT
LAST NIGHT.

I THOUGHT THE OLD GIRL
DIED DELIBERATELY

TO BRING ME BACK
INTO THE FOLD.

GOOD SON-IN-LAWS
ARE HARD TO FIND.

IT ALMOST WORKED.

I GOT INTO
THAT STATION WAGON

WITH MY KIDS AND JO,

WALKED INTO THAT HOUSE.

SOME ANCIENT VERSION
OF MYSELF SAID,

"YOU'VE COME HOME."

THEN NEENIE WENT AHEAD
AND DIED THAT NIGHT.

OF COURSE
I COULDN'T LEAVE.

I HAD TO STAY.
THEY NEEDED ME.

NEED,
THE ULTIMATE SEDUCER.

SHE WROTE THIS NOTE

REQUESTING THAT WE
SCATTER HER ASHES
OFF OUR PIER

AND INSTRUCTIONS
THAT NO ONE BE THERE

BUT JO, THE KIDS,
AND ME.

SO THAT BRINGS US
TO LAST NIGHT.

I GUESS, UH, WE...

WE, UH...

WE DID WHAT PEOPLE DO

WHEN SOMEBODY
IN THE FAMILY DIES.

WE TRIED TO
REWRITE HISTORY,

TRIED
TO MAKE EVERYTHING

THE WAY WE THOUGHT
IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE.

IT WASN'T.

YOU WENT TO BED
TOGETHER.

JO WANTED THE PROOF
SHE HADN'T LOST ME.

I WANTED TO
MAKE HER REGRET

SHE EVER
THREW ME OUT.

THREE YEARS
OF HURT MALE EGO

TRYING TO GET
ITS REVENGE,

BUT WE DID NOT
MAKE LOVE.

YOU DID NOT MAKE LOVE?

MY EQUIPMENT
WENT ON STRIKE.

WHAT CAN I SAY?
I KNOW.

EQUIPMENT FAILURE
SHOULD NOT BE

ONE'S LAST LINE
OF DEFENSE

AGAINST INFIDELITY.

[WHINING]

[WHEEZE]

HE CAN HARDLY BREATHE.

WE BETTER TAKE HIM
TO THE VET.

WE'LL HAVE TO CHANGE
THE NAME OF HIS CARD

TO GEORGE LIVINGSTONE.

OK, POOCH, IN A FEW MINUTES,
YOU'LL FEEL LIKE NEW.

THEY ALL HATE THE NEEDLE,
DON'T THEY, DOC?

NO. HE DOESN'T
LIKE THE NAME POOCH.

YES, HE DOES.

WE'LL KEEP HIM
OVERNIGHT.

HE'S NEVER
SPENT A NIGHT
AWAY FROM HOME.

SHALL WE RENT
THE ADJOINING CAGE FOR US?

I'D BETTER CLEAN
THE RUG.

GEORGE MUST HAVE
BEEN TERRIFIED.

HE NEVER PEES INSIDE.

BETH.

I'M TRYING TO SAVE
MY BEST ORIENTAL RUG.

CAN YOU MAKE SOMETHING FUNNY
OUT OF THAT?

DON'T TELL ME
IT WAS JUST A RUG.

IT WAS A WEDDING PRESENT
FROM PETER'S AUNT MATILDA.

I HAD
ANOTHER MARRIAGE, TOO.

I DIDN'T STAY WITH JO.
I CAME HOME TO YOU.

SHOULD I BE GRATEFUL
FOR YOUR SENSE OF DUTY?

OR SHALL I CALL IT
HONOR?

I'M SORRY.

WE BOTH MADE A MISTAKE.

IF WE ADMIT IT NOW,

THERE WON'T BE
ANY LASTING HARM,

JUST A LITTLE EMBARRASSMENT

WE SHOULD BOTH
BE OLD ENOUGH TO TAKE.

WE MET EACH OTHER

AT A VULNERABLE TIME
IN BOTH OUR LIVES,

AND WE HELPED EACH OTHER
THROUGH IT.

WE SHOULD HAVE BEEN GRATEFUL
JUST FOR THAT

AND NOT HAVE TRIED
TO PUSH IT INTO MARRIAGE.

WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?

WHAT WE SHOULD HAVE SAID
BEFORE.

GOOD-BYE.

MY IMPOTENT, PATHETIC
LITTLE CRIME

HAS GIVEN YOU THE GIFT

YOU'VE
BEEN LOOKING FOR--

PUNISHMENT
FOR BEING HAPPY.

ALL RIGHT, YOU HAVE IT.

I'LL LEAVE THE KEYS
ON THE HALL TABLE.

MY SECRETARY WILL CALL
AND MAKE ARRANGEMENTS

TO PICK UP
THE REST OF MY THINGS.

TAXI!

[WHISTLE]

IT WASN'T HONOR,
DAMN IT!

I CAME BACK
BECAUSE I WANTED YOU.

GOD KNOWS WHY.

I WANTED
TO MAKE LOVE TO YOU

AND YOUR DOUBTS,
YOUR GUILTS,

ALL THE TERRIBLE DEMANDS
YOU PUT UPON YOURSELF.

I WANTED TO LIE WITH YOU
IN THE NIGHT

KNOWING THAT YOU'RE WRESTLING
WITH YOUR DEMONS, TOO.

CAN'T YOU SEE THAT MY HEART,
MY GUTS, MY SOUL,

WORST OF ALL, MY HEAD...
IT'S CRYING OUT FOR YOU.

DO YOU THINK
SOMEONE'S TELLING US

THAT WE DESERVE
EACH OTHER?

[RING]

[RING]

JUST WHEN
I FOUND SOMETHING
FOR A HEADACHE

THAT BEATS ASPIRIN.

[RING]

HELLO.

HI.

HI, DARLING.

WHICH DARLING
IS IT?

IT'S ROBIN.

HI, SWEETHEART.

DADDY!

HI.

WHAT WAS THE GIFT
THAT CARING BROUGHT?

CARING?

THE DOLPHIN...

THAT BROUGHT YLLIB
AND NIBOR GIFTS.

WELL, THERE WAS CORAL
FROM THE SOUTH SEAS,

AND A BEAUTIFUL
GIANT...PEARL

THAT WAS STILL
IN THE OYSTER SHELL

FROM THE SEA OF JAPAN,

AND DRAWINGS
OF ALL THE ADVENTURES

THAT THEIR DADDY HAD HAD

SO SHE AND YLLIB
COULD SHARE IN THEM...

AND A PERFECT SHELL
FROM THE PACIFIC

SO THEY COULD ALWAYS
HEAR THE OTHER OCEAN

THAT THEIR DADDY TRAVELED.

DADDY?

MM-HMM?

YOU KNOW.

♪ SEE YOU IN THE MORNING ♪

♪ SEE YOU
IN THE EVENING ♪

♪ SEE YOU IN THE SUMMERTIME ♪

♪ DA DA DA DA DA DA ♪

♪ DA DA DA
DA DA DA ♪♪

GOOD NIGHT, DADDY.

GOOD NIGHT, SWEET GIRL.

GOOD NIGHT.

GOOD NIGHT,
MY BILLY BOY.

I LOVE YOU.

LOVE YOU, TOO.

OH, I WANT TO HIDE.

[DOOR OPENS]

LET'S SHUT OUT THE WORLD.

THE OPERATOR SAID

THE LINE WAS
OFF THE HOOK,

BUT WHY WOULD SHE LEAVE
THE PHONE OFF THE HOOK?

IT'S NOT LIKE MOM,

BUT IT'S NOTHING
TO WORRY ABOUT.

YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO LEAVE
JUST BECAUSE I DID.

I DIDN'T FEEL LIKE
SLEEPING OVER ANYWAY.

NO BARKING.

THAT'S A FIRST.

MAYBE HE'S LOCKED
IN MOM'S ROOM,

AND HE'S SLEEPING.

NO. MOM WOULD NEVER LET
GEORGE SLEEP UP THERE.

THAT'S STRANGE.

ALL THE LIGHTS ARE ON.

GREAT.

MOM YELLS AT US
TO PUT THE FOOD AWAY,

THEN SHE LEAVES IT OUT.

SHE'S NEVER
DONE THIS BEFORE.

PEW.

GEORGE MUST HAVE PEED.

THERE IT IS.

OH, IT SMELLS.

LARRY'S COAT'S OUT,
TOO.

THAT'S ODD.

OH, GOD.

THERE MUST HAVE BEEN
A STRUGGLE.

[SIREN]

STAY OUT HERE

UNTIL WE TELL YOU
IT'S ALL RIGHT.

OH, BOY.

OH!

DON'T SHOOT!

WE FOUND YOUR FOLKS--

IN TIPTOP CONDITION.

WHERE WERE THEY?

I THINK
THEY SHOULD EXPLAIN.

HA HA HA!
HA HA HA HA HA!

THOSE POOR KIDS
MUST BE CONFUSED.

AT A TIME WHEN THE WORLD
IS COMING OUT OF THE CLOSET,

THEIR MOTHER AND STEPFATHER
ARE GOING IN.

I'M SO SORRY
THAT WE SCARED YOU.

OH, MOM.

PETEY?

I DON'T KNOW
WHAT I WOULD DO

IF SOMETHING HAPPENED
TO THE TWO OF YOU.

DEAR NIBOR AND YLLIB,

ANOTHER MOVING DAY.

WE'VE HAD LOTS OF THOSE,
SEPARATELY AND TOGETHER,

AND CERTAINLY,
IN YOUR YOUNG LIVES AT LEAST,

THERE'LL BE LOTS TO COME.

BUT WHEREVER YOU ARE,
OLD PALS OF MINE,

HOWEVER TEMPEST-TOSSED
THE SEAS WE SAIL,

YOU'RE ALWAYS WITH ME.

COME ON!

[ARF! ARF!]

BETH, COME ON!
PETEY!

CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY
THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING
INSTITUTE, INC.

CAPTIONS COPYRIGHT 1989
LORIMAR

♪ IT'S VERY CLEAR ♪

♪ OUR LOVE IS HERE
TO STAY ♪

♪ NOT FOR A YEAR ♪

♪ BUT EVER AND A DAY ♪

♪ THE RADIO ♪

♪ AND THE TELEPHONE ♪

♪ AND THE MOVIES
THAT WE KNOW ♪

♪ MAY JUST BE
PASSING FANCIES ♪

♪ AND IN TIME MAY GO ♪

♪ BUT, OH, MY DEAR ♪

♪ OUR LOVE IS HERE
TO STAY ♪

♪ TOGETHER WE'RE ♪

♪ GOING A LONG, LONG WAY ♪

♪ IN TIME,
THE ROCKIES MAY CRUMBLE ♪

♪ GIBRALTAR MAY TUMBLE ♪

♪ THEY'RE ONLY
MADE OF CLAY ♪

♪ BUT OUR LOVE IS HERE ♪

♪ TO STAY ♪

♪ THE RADIO ♪

♪ AND THE TELEPHONE ♪

♪ AND THE MOVIES
THAT WE KNOW ♪

♪ MAY JUST BE
PASSING FANCIES ♪

♪ AND IN TIME MAY GO ♪

♪ BUT, OH, MY DEAR ♪

♪ OUR LOVE IS HERE
TO STAY ♪

♪ TOGETHER WE'RE ♪

♪ GOING A LONG, LONG WAY ♪

♪ IN TIME,
THE ROCKIES MAY CRUMBLE ♪

♪ GIBRALTAR MAY TUMBLE ♪

♪ THEY'RE ONLY
MADE OF CLAY ♪

♪ BUT OUR LOVE IS HERE ♪

♪ TO STAY ♪

♪ OUR LOVE IS HERE ♪

♪ TO STAY ♪♪