Saving Shuli (2021) - full transcript
Very nice film , if you want to laugh go watch it/
What's your name?
My name?
Shuli.
Hoolli. -No.
Not Hoolli, Shuli.
Julie?
-No, Shuli, Shuli.
Shuli. -Shuli.
Yes Shuli. -Shuli
What's your name? -Andrea.
-Andrea.
Good name, I like Andrea.
-Yeah...
You want to do the...
The Titanic?
Yeah, yeah, let's do the
Titanic. -Okay.
You here.
-Yes.
And I like that.
You know...
Come, come, want to
drink something?
Yeah. -Yeah?
-Yeah.
Okay, let's drink.
What do you want to drink?
Okay, I know, I know,
excuse me, you have Arak?
Arak, something like that. -Beer?
Give me this, the big, the big.
Beer, Whiskey?
-Ah, Whiskey, yeah
It's 200,000
-Take it, alright.
Hi you know, I can
do like this.
Yeah, look.
-No, no, no!
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
-No, no!
Present for you.
-Thank you, for me?
Yeah, for you. For me?
For me. For you. -Wow!
Big spender!
-Yeah, Andrea, you know,
I have a very, very, famous
and rich family
in Israel. -Really?
-Yeah.
So you want to go for a walk
in my neighborhood?
For your neighbor... Si.
-Yeah, over there.
Yes of course, yes.
Come on, let's go!
United King Films Present
You live here?
-Yes, you like it?
Nice.
You like it.
-Very. Very good, yeah, very good.
Hello.
How are you, friend?
Give me the keys, now!
Keys! Wallet! -Okay.
You want me to shoot you?
The backpack! The backpack!
-Okay.
Julietta, step back.
Give me the backpack, you've
already lost it, hurry up idiot!
Okay. -Do you think
I'm joking around?
Here.
-Show me.
Here.
Shit!
Fuck.
Fuck.
Fuck.
לשחרר את שולי LeSachrer et Shuli
SAVING SHULI
You piece of shit.
Look.
He's Israeli, look,
Shuli Kahalany.
What do you want?
So your dad has money.
What?
Babe, how do you say Rich?
-Rich.
Father, your father...
He's rich?
Yes, yes, yes, very rich.
Very, very rich, yes.
Babe, we struck gold,
how about that?
My fine thing
I knew this fine ass
would make me a millionaire.
Daddy.
Twenty five shekels
for a haircut?
Damti, I don't have that kind
of money. Do I look like Omer Adam?
Twenty five shekels.
Nati, Nati...
Damti here wants 25
shekels for a haircut.
Did you lose your mind,
what do you mean 25 shekels?
Do you think he has
that kind of money?
It's just 25 shekels,
what's the big deal?
Udi, Udi, Udi...
Do me a favor,
stay out of this.
What did your dad do, some
snipping noises with the scissors?!
Isn't that so,
Betzalel?
What do you say, Tamara?
After the head massage...
Do you feel like going for
a little walk with Beztalel?
What was that good for?
Why are you like that?
Cool down a bit, this is 2020.
Here you go, dry
yourself up.
No need, you left me
hanging as it is.
Batzi, come here.
We need your negotiation skills.
Come here, Damti is
trying to trick us.
Why are you wet?
The washer pulled a "Me
douche" on me.
Put water in my ears,
I can't hear a thing.
Tell me, Avihu,
if the washer quits,
and another washer replace her,
does the old washer throw her a shower?
Did you hear what I just
told him Betzalel?
I can't hear, she put water in my ears.
Don't you get it?
Batzi, Batzi, Damti here,
wants to buy himself a penthouse
* He wants me to pay him 25 shekels
for a haircut.
75 shekels for a haircut?
Damti, did you lose you mind?
-No.
Does he look like Eyal Golan,
carrying around money like that?
From what I see here,
I think...
More or less...
-Give or take...
Twenty five shekels.
Twenty five shekels.
Nice!
I'm surrounded by morons.
Surrounded by idiots.
Hello, who here is Avihu
Kahalani?
Avihu.
If it's about the
property tax...
I know I listed my apartment
as a synagogue,
But next week, God willing,
we're bringing in a Torah.
Next year, for Yom Kipur
you're all invited!
God willing.
-No guarantees.
It's about your son, Shuli.
I'm afraid I have
some bad news.
Shuli?
Here you go, he's waking up,
Avihu?
Mr. Kahalani.
What happened?
He's waking up.
Calm down, Avihu.
-It's not a dream.
Calm down, it's not a dream.
-It's not a dream.
Look, look, look, look.
It's not as bad as it sounds.
Really?
All the kidnappers want is money.
A ransom.
Usually the sums
are quite low.
Fifty grand...
Oh boy...
I'm not feeling well.
-Oh boy...
I'm not feeling well, holy moly.
Calm down, Avihu.
-Holy moly I'm not well.
Avihu, calm down.
It's bad for your blood pressure.
You just had heart surgery.
Here, drink something, calm down.
Calm down, Shhh...
It's cold, the tooth!
You didn't fix the cavity?
Haircut and fix my tooth?
Who am I? Static and Ben-El?
Avihu, Avihu, go home,
have some rest.
Take care of your teeth, and let the Ministry of
Foreign Affairs take care of everything.
We know how to
handle these things.
Yes, I saw how you handled
Gilad Shalit.
That was The Ministry of Defense.
Five years the boy was imprisoned,
eating nothing but Hummus,
watching the world cup,
dressed him up like a sissy
and that was a white boy.
Nobody cares about a kidnapped
Yemenite boy.
That's the truth.
Nati, Betzalel...
We're going to Colombia.
Nice!
We're going to free Shuli
and nothing will stop us!
Avihu!
Avihu! -Avihu!
-Avihu! -Avihu!
Look, look, the Israeli flag!
-Calm down, calm down.
Look, the Israeli flag, tell him.
Here, stop here.
Stop right here.
What do you say Avihu,
how much will he charge?
Don't worry about it.
Batzi, what do you say,
how much will he charge?
Just hope that he won't dupe us.
We've been duped!
What are you... Pay him already.
You pay him. You...
We've been duped.
-Here, for your health.
For your health, my dear.
Fuck you. -Have a good afternoon
-Good health.
Fuck you, he tells me.
Where to?
-Hi there.
I'm here to talk with
the ambassador.
Do you have an appointment?
Do you think I need
an appointment?
My son, he's getting whipped
in the Favelas
and you want me to
make an appointment?
Avihu, relax, I'll
talk to him.
Avihu, let me talk to him.
- As if I need an appointment.
Ask nicely, what are you
getting so angry about?
Hi my man, how are you?
We came to free Shuli,
Avihu's kidnapped son.
I'm sorry, you can't come in
without an appointment.
Let me, give me a moment.
-What is he saying?
Let me have a try. You with your nonsense.
Daddy-o, listen up,
how can I score something
around here?
What are you talking about
scoring?!
I want to meet the ambassador
or I'll mess this place up.
Avihu, Avihu,
calm down.
What did this chair ever do to you?
You can't be like that.
-Code 338.
-We came to free the boy not to cause havoc.
Let them run me over.
-Avihu.
You can't do this.
If they won't bring the kid,
they can run me over.
Don't touch me.
-It won't work like this.
Come
You need to be strong. We talked about this.
Patience.
Open up please.
Hello. -G'morning.
-G'morning.
Okay, the ambassador
is currently out of town
he asked me personally.
-Fuck my life, he's not here.
-Here comes a bus
it can run me over -Avihu!
He's a bit stressed.
Excuse him, a kidnapped son after all.
Of course, I understand.
He asked me personally
to take care of you.
I'll take you now to the hotel.
I'll update you on all the
details on the way there, okay?
Okay, it's...
-Nice to me you, I'm Coral.
Nice!
Coral, did you ever think
to Hebraicize it
To... Corachel?
Did you here what I
said to her, Batzi?
To Hebraicize it
to Corachel.
Maybe Coruthy?
Guys, help me out.
Corina.
Corona.
Corenough, take your stuff.
-Let's go.
Come, the car is
here at the back.
Cute, this Corachel
girl, huh Batzi?
After you.
Betzalel, what do you think?
Do you think she knows
if there's Wi-Fi here?
What Wi-Fi, you didn't
get an internet package?
I used it all up in the plane,
binging on porn.
It's beautiful here, in real life.
Nicer than in Narcos.
Did he end up finding
his mom?
Not Marco, dummy.
"Narcos" with Pablo Escobar, the man.
Colombia isn't just about
"Narcos"
it's a country full of culture,
heritage, art, literature.
You probably remember the picturesque
descriptions of Gabriel Garcaia Maarquez
in his book "One Hundred
Years of Solitude".
Speaking of "One Hundred Years
of Solitude"
Where did Gabriel go
to blow off steam?
I'll give you one...
Relax, what's up with you.
-As if you came here to party.
God help me, what a city.
God knows where well find him.
You called my father?
He hasn't eaten in three days.
What are you planning
to do about Shuli?
The kidnappers didn't
contact us yet.
But it always takes three, four
days for them to contact.
They do it to intimidate.
He's lucky his mom isn't alive.
He brings us nothing but worries.
I'm sorry, I didn't know
you were a widower.
I wish I was that lucky.
I'll give you one!
Relax what's with you?
-You're all over my case since we landed.
Batzi's wife is Avihu's sister.
Oh, you're brothers in law?
That's nice.
-Unfortunately.
What's your wife's name, Betzalel?
Batzi's wife has two names:
Etti and Margalit.
Oh, so how do you call her?
Hitler.
Ouch! -Enough already!
-Can you just leave me be?
Get off of me already!
You're scaring Corachel, enough!
Leave her alone, she's not going
to want to help save Shuli!
You broke his fan.
Here, you broke the driver's fan.
-Me, me, me, it's all me.
You, yes, you.
-Yes, me.
What about you Nati,
you're not married?
I'm single as a butterfly,
sting like a bee.
Ay!
Betzalel, do you have any kids?
No.
What do you mean "No"?
Vardina, Zohara and Hadassah.
I thought she meant boys.
Be grateful you don't have any boys,,
they only bring trouble.
So I understand that Shuli
didn't get insurance.
No.
Problematic kid.
Okay, the Ministry will help to cover expenses.
Where are you staying?
Casa Yiftach.
Casa Hilton. -Casa Hilton.
Oh, at the Hilton?
Don't worry, Corachel,
we came to free Shuli.
We won't go overboard.
Nice!
He gives me an invoice: Due net 30.
Now I already paid VAT
on the 15th.
One...
Two...
Nice!
Nice!
Nice!
Mr. Betzalel...
We're in Colombia for 24 hours,
no sign of Shuli.
Instead of searching for him,
we're here partying.
Getting wild with an ass.
What's going on in there?
What a night, Avihu, wow!
It was a Pony.
I'll smack your head!
Relax, Avihu.
Corachel said the kidnappers
will contact us.
There's nothing we can do.
-There's lots we can do.
We need to go out,
ask people.
What do you want,
that we just roam the streets
asking people if they saw Shuli?
-Yes.
Did you see Shuli?
Napo, did you see Shuli?
Good morning. -Good morning,
Corachel, did they call?
Is there a sign of Shuli?
The kid is gone.
Stop, please, stop.
Okay? Stop.
My son also...
They say "My son", but
we don't know where he is.
That poor kid is in the Favelas
and we're partying here
with a bunch of sissies.
The kid is gone.
Avihu, relax, you're
after a heart surgery.
Stop! Okay don't touch me.
They keep touching me.
Her too, for an hour now
she's massaging my wooden leg.
There's nothing we can do, Avihu.
-There's lots to do, okay?
There's lots to do.
To go, ask people, gather around,
score something.
Score something? Sure.
Gram? Nathaniel? Gram?
Napo, gram?
Gram? Corachel, gram?
Gram?
Natalia, gram?
Gram?
Gram? Anybody wants
a gram?
Fine, fine, fine,
this idiot doesn't want to eat
I'll make him eat this.
You're going to eat this.
-No, no, no
Open your mouth, open mouth,
open up! -Please, no!
That idiot son of a bitch!
Come here, calm down.
It's all good, man.
We're going to
his dad
well collect the money,
and we'll relax, okay?
Avihu, what's wrong Daddy-O?
You look like you've been
stood up on your birthday.
Yes, Avihu, what's wrong?
We're not used to
seeing you like that.
I'm tired of partying,
I want to find Shuli.
What do you say,
Avihu...
Maybe we can treat you
with something that will relax you,
comfort you with some...
Hawaij and leg soup?
And back, -And head,
-Nail, -Lungs?
And stomach, -And udder
-And Ear, -And nose -And throat.
No, I don't feel like
eating anything.
They called.
From Telegrass?
-The kidnappers called.
The kidnappers called?
What are they saying? Is Shuli ok?
How is he?
They want to meet.
I have the address right here.
I've already told the ambassador, he called
the police and they're sending someone
No police and no nothing, honey.
Batzi, come on, we're going.
I'm good with negotiations.
-Wait, I'll come with you.
I can speak Spanish and in the
military I also served as...
Corachel, sweetheart, I don't have
time to take care of someone else there.
Okay? I don't have the
headspace forthat.
Stay here with Nati, he
has migration anxiety as it is.
Batzi. -Separation anxiety.
Tell her about your
separation anxiety.
Batzi, are you sure
this is the right place?
Relax, daddy-O, drink some
water, you seem tense.
Ouch my tooth.
-You didn't fix the cavity?
When exactly, during the flight?
-Shhh....
"Take care of the cavity"
he tells me.
Batzi, look at his tattoos.
This is Colombia, everybody has tattoos,
it's for show.
Avichu.
Avihu.
You're Hully's dad.
Batzi, ask him if
Shuli is okay.
Shiri, how are you honey?
Ask him please in Spanish,
if Shuli is OK?
If the kid is feeling nice?
The boy is a man.
He eats?
What? -What. He didn't
understand.
Shiri, what do you don't
get? Ask him if the boy is alive.
The boy is alive?
-Yes, yes, yes.
Look.
Look at the boy.
Shuli.
I want Shuli!
I want Shuli!
Please.
If you want him, it will
cost you 20 thousand dollars.
What is he saying?
Batzi what is he saying?
If you want him, it will cost
you 20 thousand dollars.
twenty thousand dollars?
Batzi, do something. I don't have
20 thousand dollars.
Relax, relax, it's the
basics of negotiation,
he's stalling.
Are you sure?
-Yes, what are you stressed about?
look at him with his
dried prune face
I'll fart on his face in a second.
He should be thankful to get a hundred
pesos and slap across the face
Relax, that's negotiating.
He's stalling.
What are you stressed about this dried
up prune -Stop it. -Batzi.
Shut it up, Batzi. -Shut up!
-In a second...
I fart on his face. -Batzi.
-He should be thankful
if he gets a hundred pesos
and a slap across the face.
So can we Venmo you?
It's already night time,
how are they not back yet?
Relax, Corachel,
I know Batzi,
they probably already
got the kid
And went to blow off steam
all together.
You're not worried?
The only thing I'm
worried about
is that I'm not with
them blowing off steam.
Although I rather stay
here with you.
How come you never
got married, Nati?
I don't know.
I never managed to score.
And don't you want a family?
You don't want to have a kid?
A kid, no.
But lately I've been
feeling ready for a grandchild.
Did you hearthat?
I said "ready for a grandchild"
I'm looking for a
surrogate grandma.
Wow!
You're like a fountain.
They should put you in
the middle of a piazza.
You crack me up.
As long as you're
not an egg that cracks.
What about you, Corachel?
Not ready for a child,
grandchild, great grandchild?
I actually really want kids.
-Oh yeah?
But maybe now just
isn't the right time.
It's difficult to have a
career and to raise a kid on my own.
What are you talking
about, Corachel?
A girl like you opens
up Tinder,
They're going to line up
like at a dispensary
Did you hearthat?
Like at the dispensary.
A girl like you opens
up Tinder,
You won't sleep at night
from all the notification bells.
What is she saying?
Alone? Who's alone?
What is she saying? What
is she saying?
I don't know, whenever
I wanted someone
something always got in
the way in the last minute.
What can get in the way?
All you frustrations...
-Mommy!
All of your frustrations
you take them out on me!
What did I do?
What's that? What happened?
Did you get robbed?
Avihu, how did it go?
The kid is gone.
The kid is gone.
We had some disagreements
with the kidnappers.
We proposed one thing
and they proposed to take
all of our money and clothes.
Why? Because of Batzi.
Batzi had to push it
and show off.
And that's why the
kid is gone.
That's it, gone,
he's done.
Avihu, relax, nobody is done,
let's keep things in perspective.
I too lost something precious.
I lost my Rolex.
You lost your Rolex.
-Yes!
He lost his Rolex.
It's a very precious thing.
Ouch!
Avihu, let go!
Avihu, not with this!
You piece of crap, lost his Rolex.
-Avihu calm down.
Avihu I'm allergic to melons!
Ouch, the head, Avihu!
Stop it, Avihu, the girls,
it's embarrassing!
Come here!
-Ouch, stop it, Nati!
Maybe you can separate them?
You're right.
Nati, help me, Nati!
Nati, I don't... Nati!
-Come on, let him go!
Are we here to fight?
What's the matter with you?
Nati.
Stop it! Stop it!
Ouch, stop it!
Ouch! Ouch!
-More! More!
I'll tear you apart....
-Move! Just a second...
Move him over I tell you.
Avihu, not the TV!
Let go of the TV!
Avihu!
They'll charge us!
Did they pay?
These cheapskates
aren't going to pay.
That's all I got you.
Ricardo, never mind,
Look, next time we'll
get someone with more money.
But let's let this dumbass go.
Free him? Will you
listen to that...
Look what's going to
happen with this dumbass!
No, no!
-No, no...
I can't let him go,
he saw my face
He saw our faces.
-No, no.
Goodbye, my man.
-No, no, no!
Ricardo, please, no.
-Stop it, stop it!
No, please!
He already saw our faces! What?
-Look, look, look.
Look.
"Shuli served in the Israeli
army, he was a sergeant"
"In the unit for..."
-Oh man...
Is that you bro?
Is that you?
You... You.. Soldier?
You, you soldier.
-Yes.
Yes, very, very soldier.
Kill. Kill.
Yes, yes.
Amazing! Why didn't you
say that before, dummy?
Now we're really going
to get rich, my pretty thing!
This is so good!
My love, listen, I have a friend
that hangs with a group in Santa Marta
They just got some weapons
from Israel.
Maybe they need some idiot
to do their training?
Ricardo, the Israeli army will
come after us. -Shut up, come on!
Chucho!
-Chucho?
Ricardo,
Listen, I have something
amazing for you.
I heard the Revive Project
is doing a duet with Haim Revivo?
The kid is gone.
The kid is gone.
-He's not going anywhere.
He's not going anywhere, Avihu.
It's part of the negotiation process.
They're trying to have the upper hand.
It's legitimate.
They'll come to their sense,
calm down, name their price,
well pay them,
free Shuli.
The kidnappers severed
all communications.
The kid is gone. Come
Nati, we're leaving.
Shit.
It's Eti, my military reserve kit
is in the room, what do I do?
Don't answer it.
If I don't answer her,
she'll call the war room.
What do I do now?
What do I do?
I have an idea, Batzi.
Stand in the sun, it's going to be
so bright, she won't see where you are.
Nati, you're a genius.
Nice.
The sun is here, I need it
to shine right on the phone.
Nice.
Hi, Eti, what's up?
Betzalel where are you
you useless piece of shit!
I'm in the field. It's so
hot, 40 degrees and sunny, so sunny.
What are you talking about, it's 10pm?!
10pm...
There's a time difference...
Stupid, who stands in the sun
when it's 10pm at home.
Where are you,
you Yemenite bastard?
Betzalel where are you?
-Eti it's not what you're thinking.
I can explain.
You're in Colombia?!
Listen up, Eti.
Shuli has been kidnapped.
Your nephew has been kidnapped
and I came here to help out
because I'm good at negotiating.
And second of all...
Wait, how do you know
I'm in Colombia?
How do I know, from your watch.
I can see you're in Colombia,
that's how I know.
From the watch?
You should be ashamed of yourself.
You put a tracker in my watch?
You're following me?
You don't trust me?
I don't trust you?
Who's playing rescue captain
while actually partying in South America?
Wait, there's a tracker
in your watch?
Tell the slut to stay our of it.
She's no slut it's Rachel
from the embassy.
Corachel, now isn't a good time now.
There's a family crisis
with Hitler.
This is a crisis of trust.
Apparently, Betzalel is married
to the head of the FBI.
Agent A from the Mossad.
Avihu, be careful when
'you're eating your Jachnun
make sure she didn't put cameras
in the sauce.
You've been my
wife for 20 years
And you get me a watch
to track me.
Betzalel there's a tracker
in your stollen watch
And now Shuli's
kidnappers have it.
Corachel, stay out of it.
Asking me questions like
we're on jeopardy.
Put me up on "Wheel of Fortune".
Move over, stupid,
Batzi you're a genius!
Give it to me.
Eti, where is the watch located at the moment?
Avihu, what are you
doing there?
Opening a TGI Friday's
in Colombia.
What do you think I'm doing? I'm Freeing Shuli.
-Freeing his kid!
Where do see the
watch on the map?
Selencio... Selento!
Selento, what's Selento?
What did she say? -What's Selento?
-Yes, yes, yes -What did she say?
What did she say? -What is she saying?
-Shhh! Let her talk!
It's a village in the
Cocora valley,
It's a few hours drive
from here, it's the coffee region.
Eti, God bless you, I'm hanging up.
Listen, Corachel,
Batzi, go get the computer.
-The computer!
Come on Corachel, make it snappy.
Nati, let go of Napo.
-What do you mean "Let go"
I have to return him,
he's on my card.
Okay, put him back in the
minibar and come back.
Shuli...
Daddy's on his way.
Shuli...
At the bridge, drive straight.
Batzi, such a radiophonic voice,
you can replace Eliko
Nice.
Help.
Keep right at the roundabout,
and make a hard swerve to the left.
He's a pro!
Avihu, can I ask how come
you have a wooden leg?
Sad story.
-Very sad story.
I lost it on Yom Kippur.
During the war?
During the fast.
He went rollerblading on
the hills of Nes Ziona,
and tripped on a rock,
because he was too stubborn.
Okay. Bye, stay well.
-Bye honey.
Thank you very much.
Look who came
from the big city?
And where's Ricardo?
We're over.
-Over?
You came back with your tail
between your legs.
Thanks for the support, dad.
Did you make some
money at least?
You brought a watch?
"Made by Marmorek"?
It's a knock-off.
It's worth nothing.
You want me to wear
something like that?
What's that? The signal is out.
What do you mean the signal is out?
-I can't believe it. -Show it to me.
Maybe they went into
an elevator?
What elevator, these are all
cabins with two floors.
"Elevator" he tells me.
Maybe they went to
do an MRI?
What do we do now,
Corachel?
Maybe it will come back,
wait a minute.
How about we find a place to stay the night,
wait for it to come back?
We can keep it down to earth,
nothing fancy.
As long as the rooms are clean.
And air conditioned. -And with
a pool. -And a spa.
And shut up!
Good morning to
all of my followers,
And today we are at the
"most amazing hostel in Cocora,
which is the coffee
region of Colombia
And why is it so amazing?
Because I'm here, and you're here/
let's see who else is here “
Anything?
Nothing, nada.
Wow backpacking mid-life-crisis old men.
This is something
I have to see.
What can I do for you?
-Hi there.
Coffee from the
coffee region?
I only drink black,
from the Turkish valley.
Hilarious, old people jokes,
I'm dying here!
G'morning -G'morning -Good morning
-G'morning -G'morning
G'morning.
How did you sleep, Nati?
Like a bear cub.
Want some coffee
from the coffee region?
Couldn't you bring a croissant
from the pastry region too?
Did you hear what
I just said?
Amazing hit me with another
one gramps, let's hear another.
What is she saying?
-What are you saying?
What does she want?jWhat,..^
is she saying?^
Wait a second, honey, what
do you want? -What is she saying?
Wait a second who are
you? -Me? I'm Coral?
Coral, which is like "Airnog"
in English, and I'm Almog.
So what do you want to tell
all the viewers at Almog's Blog?
Hi.
Never steal my
spotlight like that again.
Excuse me?
I can't sit here anymore.
The pain in my tooth.
I'm... this tooth is killing me.
How do we
find the kid?
What do we do?
What do we do?
Ayahuasca.
What?
Ayahuasca. It's this ceremony
some native guy does
and he gives you this tea
and then you can
make some wishes
and then in the end,
there's like a revelation.
What do you say, )
Avihu?
Shall we do an Ayahuasca?
I want to hear... Really,
I want to hear once and for all:
What did we come here for?
I want to hear what did we come
here for? -To free the kid.
I can't hear you Nati,
can't hear you.
Free the kid.
I can't hear you.
-Free Shuli.
Good, so what's this
Kawasaki now?
What's this Kawasaka for?
Huh? -Avihu...
Avihu, daddy-O, open
up your mind.
There are mysterious
things we can't understand.
What if we go to that Ayahuasca
and Shuli will appear in your revelation
and you'll know where he is?
There are things in this world
that are beyond our comprehension.
To this day, I don't
understand why one man is rich
and another is poor.
Why is there hunger?
-Why are there wars?
Why is Avihu mad
all the time?
Free your mind,
daddy-O.
Wait a minute.
Requests for dental care,
is that included in
the Ayahuasca?
Included.
We're doing an Ayahuasca.
7-Nice!
I'm going to change to something nice.
Let's go. -Corachel, we're going to
Alaska with Noa Kirel's daughter!
No, no, I'm not...
Come on, what do you mean no?
Noa Kirel's daughter.
Avner.
Nice to meet you, Avihu.
I don't know what
to ask for.
Health an longevity for
my old and sick mother
yes.
Or to learn how to whistle?
I can't do that crap.
I want my kidnapped
son back, Shuli.
Sixty years, let go
of that already.
The kidnapped Yemenites -
enough of that.
I heard you, I heard you.
What are you kissing his hand
for, he's not a Rabbi.
Batzi, free Shuli, ask
to free Shuli.
Sure.
I want to quit smoking.
You know what? To cut down
to five cigarettes a day.
You know what?
Actually to quit masturbating.
Cut that also to five a day.
Corachel, what are you
going to ask for?
I can't drink that, I'm an official representative,
of the Foreign Ministry.
But if you could,
what would you ask for?
I don't know.
True love, I guess.
It's the ambassador,
one second.
Batzi.
Just a sec.
Take your hands off,
let me drink.
He has lots of requests
that friend of yours.
Just a second, I need a second,
wait a minute.
I need... they're calling me...
That cracker chewed
How long I waited for
this moment.
I haven't eaten
in three days.
Were you too excited?
No, because you're
not supposed to.
Why, did you eat?
I'm such an idiot for
listening to you again,
instead of going to look
for Shuli.
You're going to blame
me again?
Why? Is it my fault
that the he went to Colombia?
You only think of yourself.
You only think of Betzalel.
Makes me want to vomit.
I'm thinking only of myself?
Your irresponsibility
makes me want to vomit!
Ouch. -Please, guys,
enough with the word "vomit"
it makes me actually vomit.
I'm done with you,
I don't want to see your face.
I'm done with you!
I don't want to see you
or hear you.
Another one...
I'm done with myself!
Don't want to see m
or hear myself!
Avihu!
Do an Ayahuasca they said...
What Ayahuasca?!
Go, you'll have a revelation,
you'll get dental work,
The kid is gone for.
Holy jeepers
I hope their not too expensive,
going to tear a hole in my pocket.
You idiot what
did you do to my teeth?
How should I know?
You're the one asking
me to take out the...
It's been so long since
you bought me a gift you cheapo.
You're calling me cheap?!
-Son of a bitch...
Now you're just making stuff up.
Where did you find these swear
words that nobody's ever heard of?
I can't understand you.
Hi. -Hola.
Hello Mister.
I have a... My tooth hurts.
Hole-o, I have a hole-o.
Ay ay ay?
Ay ay ay, hole-o
Yes, yes, yes.
-Yes?
Yes, yes, come here.
Please.
Please, sit?
-Siente?
Yes.
Good.
Hole-o, hole-o.
-Jodido, jodido (Fucked up)
Hurts like hell.
Yes.
Good, very good.
-How much?
Money, money.
-50 thousand pesitos.
Huh cinci cinco?
Fifty thousand pesos.
Fifty thousand pesos?
Yes. -Fifty thousand pesos.
-pesos.
Fifty thousand pesos, how
much is that?
Fifty... That's sixty
shekels.
Sixty shekels, I'll bring over
the entire family from Marmorek
Well get a new set
a-la Eyal Golan!
Okay.
-Okay, okay.
Okay.
-Okay.
You're all set?
Put it out.
Out.
-Out, good.
You ass.
The wrench...
Jeez Louise,
This is a Holy place.
One-two, one-two-one...
Check out this echo,
Avihu.
Nice.
The body of Christ.
The body of Christ.
The body of Christ.
-Corpo Christo.
Nice.
I'm starving.
Body of Christ.
Body of Christ.
Go with it.
Body of Christ.
-Nice.
I thought this was a cracker,
but it's much more...Papery.
Body of Christ.
Allow me a moment.
Body of Christ.
Body of Christ.
Let us pray that
all mighty God
will bestow this child with new life, born
from this water and the Holy Spirit
You know that God, through
the baptisim... -Nice!
Wow, wow, wow.
-Excuse me, Sir.
Sir!
-Quiet, quiet, I'm outtie.
Such a strange Turkish Hammam.
The Turkish lost it since Erdoegan.
What will be with you, Nati,
What?
It's time you have a kid.
Look at Avihu, he'll
do anything for Shull.
Almost anything for Shuli.
Maybe that train
has left the station.
Maybe I can't have kids
anymore?
What do I need to do now?
Do I need to do a sperm count?
How much is a sperm count?
Is it part of my insurance?
Do I need to masturbate now
for my family physician?
Maybe I can count my
sperm myself.
You heard that?
I can't believe it.
If this isn't a sign from God, I
don't know what is!
What's up handsome?
Flipping hell.
Heck, you look
like Napo!
I have a friend,
exactly your size, tiny!
Not your age, he's 50 years
old, but he's your size.
You don't understand
a word I'm saying, huh?
Funny.
Who would have thought,
I'll randomly think of a kid,
and all of a sudden -
I see a kid!
Weird.
Want some?
May I?
Generous heart.
Three "Our father"
and three "Hail Mary".
-Yes.
In the name of the Father,
the Son, and the Holy Spirit.
Where's the bathroom
in this place?
Carpe Christo!
What a weird bathroom, man,
this is a third world country
even in India you have
a hole in the floor.
Someone peeking here?
Country of pervs.
Forgive me father,
for I have sinned.
Continue, please.
I sinned, father.
I helped to kidnap a good
guy for money.
He did nothing wrong, he only came to
travel in Colombia from Israel.
Shuli...
Shuli?
Father, is that you?
Yes, yes, yes.
I'm Poco.
You need to say ten times
"Ave maria"
or twenty times
"Avihu Medina"
Now...
Where's Shuli?
Hello?
Hello?
Sorry, daddy-O
either light up a match,
or wait five minutes.
Where is she? Hello?
Where are you?
Chiquitita!
Just a second,
give me a minute!
Wait...
Gotcha.
Surprising.
Here we go.
Oh yeah...
Batzi?
Wow, wow, wow...
Where did she go?
No!
Disguising.
I can't hear!
I have a surprise for you,
you're going to love it!
I'm giving you the souvenir
Napo left me.
Napo, the little guy
I was telling you about.
Huh? Handsome.
No, no, no! Did you lose
your mind?
You don't eat from the floor,
what's up with you?
Doesn't taste good.
You're hungry?
I have some Jachnun, have some buddy
you can take it all.
You'll love it,
You haven't tried something
like this Jachnun.
Did anybody ever give
you Jachnun in Colombia?
Look where we are
in the mountains
jungles, we can get
eaten by animals.
I wouldn't give it to
anyone but you.
I'm very possessive of
my Jachnuns.
So what do you say?
What do you say? How come,
you don't like it?
Oh, I didn't give you from
the sauce, wait a minute.
I know why you didn't like it.
Look at this sauce I'm going to give
you know, your head will explode.
Come here.
It's spicy! It's spicy, mom!
-What's the matter, too hot?
It's spicy!
-Too spicy?
It's not hot!
It's spicy!
-What's wrong?
Who are you?
Calm down, calm
down, what's the matter?
He wanted me to eat his black
sausage. -What are you saying?
Julio! -Miss, I gave
him some Jachnun.
Julio! -Maybe it
was too hot for him
How are you talking
to a child?
Why are you talking to him about...
-What's up bro?
I gave him some Jachnun,
I guess he didn't like it.
What the hell is the
matter with you?
What are you crazy?
-Spit it out, spit it out.
Spit it out, son.
Spit it out. -Calm down,
Sir, Sir.
I gave him.. -You're in
trouble with me now!
Amazing.
I don't feel a thing.
I don't feel a thing.
"Roca-a-bye on the
tree top"
"When the wind blows... the cradle
will rock" -I can't feel my tongue.
I can't swallow
my spit.
I can't swallow my spit...
I can't swallow the...
I can't feel my glands...
Can't feel...
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
My kidney... What
are you doing?
What are you taking?
This man is nothing
but fat.
He keeps waking up
because of you, cheap bastard.
What are you doing?
He's getting out
of it.
Give him another hit.
What are you doing?
Sorry, poor you.
-What are you doing?
Give him a little bit more.
-G'morning.
Wait -It's not fair.
-Rock-a-bye-baby...
Open your mouth so I can
give it to you -That poor bastard.
I would whip his ass up.
What ass what are
you talking about!
Granny, that's a wooden leg.
Nati!
Avihu!
Nati... -Here he
is, Nati!
Nati...
Avihu...
Nati...
I can't hear...
Nati... -Batzi...
-I can't hear...
Avihu! -Nati...
-Batzi...
Batzi... -Nati..
Avihu...
Avihu, I can't see a thing, Avihu!
Nati...
Batzi...
Dad, are you coming?
Dad?
G'morning! -G'morning Avihu!
-G'morning
Such weird dreams, all
night long I dreamt of Shuli.
So cold here in the mornings
in Colombia, goddam these Colombians.
Here you go Avihu.
What's this smell where
did you get this soup?
What's that? -That's an OG Yemenite leg soup
Here, have a proper wake up
with something warm.
Oh wow!
Batzi, that's some soup,
God bless you.
You're the best!
Wow!
Listen, Batzi, I'm sorry
I yelled at you.
Don't sweat about it.
-This soup is amazing.
Thank you very much.
Where did you
get the Chilbeh?
It's not Chilbeh.
I whipped up some coke
with lemon and ice.
It's cheaper.
Practically addictive.
Did you hear that Avihu?
I said to him "Addictive"
The meat is so tender!
Where did you
get that meat?
It was here in this cooler.
Let go of me! -What's the matter it's
just some soup! -You broke my nose!
What's the matter with you?
-You broke my nose!
My nose, you broke it!
-Enough! Calm down!
What's wrong with you?!
Look what you did to his nose,
look what you did to his nose.
He fed me my own
kidney, Nati.
What more are we going
to go through here?
It's just a kideny, you
want it you can have mine!
What are you
whining about?
I'll take yours now.
-Move over, move!
We'll get back home, I'll give
you whatever you want.
Kidney, pancreas,
liver.
"I made you soup" he tells me.
-You broke my nose, you're crazy!
I broke your nose?! You fed me my own
kidney what are you talking about?
You know that's
not Kosher?!
You know I have to go
and ask the Rabbi now?
Okay, Avihu, relax.
We'll go back home, well get
you some new balls from a bull.
I have to ask the Rabbi
now, I have to ask the Rabbi.
You guys are like family,
what are you fighting about?!
Give me that...
What, just the broth.
Here you are! Where did you disappear
to since the Ayahuasca?
Corachel?
How did you find us like
that in the middle of nowhere?
Why nowhere, the
hostel is right there.
Oh wow is that soup?
Wow, that's some
great soup.
The meat is tasty!
Thanks.
-Thanks.
So, any news of Shuli?
Did you get the watch back?
Not yet.
The kid is gone.
I remember now, listen
for a second!
Nice.
-Batzi, is it this one?
What?
No, no, no.
So where did you say, you saw a girl talking
about Shuli, about kidnapping Shuli?
You know what,
it's my fault.
'You know why it's my fault?
Because I'm sitting here with you
instead of looking for Shuli.
Avihu. -Don't "Avihu" me, I should
know better than listening to you
Avihu I swear do you,
I swear on the bible
that I sat there in the
church's bathroom
and a girl came, she said Shuli's
name and that she kidnapped him.
It was in your imagination daddy-O,
you were high from the Kawasaki.
I wasn't high
and I wasn't imagining it.
Forget about it, let's
say you didn't imagine it,
okay, this is a 200 million
people country,
this isn't Marmorek where you bump
into her and say: Here she is.
Excuse me.
Here she is, Avihu!
Here she is!
Avihu, here's the girl
that kidnapped Shuli!
Here she is!
Run, you're the fastest Nati!
Excuse me, lady.
Run, Nati, run!
You're the fastest!
Quick, let's go, Avihu!
Avihu, she's getting away!
-Stop I'm telling you!
Careful, lady.
-Here she is!
Stop, stop!
-Stop!
Corachel, hop in already!
Go!
Drive already!
Drive faster!
-Hurry up, hurry up!
Here she is! Here she is
over there!
Go, go, faster,
faster!
Here's the kid, go, go! -She turned,
right, she turned right!
Tell him to stop, Nati. -She's going
to run away, hit the gas!
Go!
Here she is! -Here
she is!
Here she is, bless your heart!
Stop! -How much
for the ride, daddy-O?
I'll Venmo you.
Stop!
Let's see you now!
Stop right there!
I'll shoot you, sons
of bitches!
Let's see you know, what's
the matter?
Wait, wait, this is Avihu,
Shuli's dad. -Yes, yes.
He came from Israel
to look for his son.
You know something
about that?
Shuli? -Yes, yes.
-Yes.
I didn't want anything to happen
to Shuli. -Okay.
He's a good guy. A bit spoiled,
picky eater.
But all I wanted was
to make some money.
To help my dad
with the farm.
I didn't want anything
to happen to Shuli.
What did she say? -What
is she saying? -What did she say?
She knows about Shuli.
Knows about Shuli!
We only want information.
-Information.
Information,
Information.
-Yes.
Thank you.
Where is Shuli?
Shuli... Shuli...
Shuli is... in...
Nati!
That was close, huh,
Avihu?
Poor thing, poor girl!
-Stupid!
Come here, come, come.
Come, come to me, come.
I just hope you didn't
overwhelm her -Drink water.
Drink water, drink water.
Drink water.
What's your name Chiquitita?
Andrea Maria Silva Posada
Del Mar Rodriguez Nerjano
That's not a name, that's a full
guest list at a wedding.
Nice to meet you, Betzalel Batzi
Ben Zion Benziahu.
I didn't want to
kidnap Shuli.
Ricardo made me do it.
Everything's alright.
Betzalel is here now.
It's okay.
I'm sorry I attacked you in
the forest. -That's okay.
Here's the watch. -Everything's alright,
everything's alright.
Where's Shuli?
-Avihu!
Tell us where's Shuli! -Avihu, relax!
You're after a kidney surgery!
He's in Santa Marta.
Corachel, go get the car,
we're going to Santa Shmarta.
Santa Marta.
Who cares?
Hi Chucho!
Ricardo, how's it going?
Good, bro. -Brother.
-Let's go.
Julio?
-What?
Meet Ricardo, he's
a friend of mine.
What's up? -Pleased to
meet you my brother.
He brought us an
Israeli solider.
Ah, nice!
Imported goods.
Look what God brought me.
Ciao, Shuli!
Shabbat Shalom!
Corachel, can you tell
the driver to drive faster?
What does he think, that
we're on a family trip?
We have to get to Ricardo
before he sells Shuli to some Cartel
Santa Marta is so beautiful!
Avihu, maybe we go to
a club and blow off some steam?
Ouch! What are you doing?
Andrea said he likes to
go to one of the clubs here,
Maybe we can find him
there and free Shuli.
Sure, for Shuli, sure thing.
Here he is.
He's there.
We got him.
We have to lure him,
take him to some alley,
lure him in there with some
pretty girl and then gang up on him.
So let's send in Andrea.
Andrea? He knows here,
you dummy.
Andrea, we need beautiful
and sexy girls,
but Ricardo knows you.
We need to find one
that you can't resist,
that you go crazy when
you see her.
You need a girl that you
want to eat up all night long,
a girl you would crawl for
in the sewers,
a girl you would forget
Nafis for her
A girl that when she tells you, you
should stop and ask for directions,
you stop...
And ask someone.
Nice.
Someone you would chemically
straighten your hair for.
Someone that when she tells you
seeing you in heels turns her on,
you put those heels.
A girl, that if she tells you she's vegan,
you won't eat meat near her.
Someone that when she tells
you leave that goatee,
you leave that goatee.
A girl that you love so much
that you would drive all the way
to Yeruham to pick up her mom
for Friday night dinner.
Hi guys.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Also wow.
Wait for me in the alley.
Stop him!
You dog!
Careful.
By God be careful.
-Where's Shuli?
Tell them what you
did with Shuli.
I sold him. I sold him
you bitch!
How did you give me up
to these sons of bitches?
Calm down with all
the bitches!
Joselito, relax, I eat
guys like you for breakfast.
She's with me now.
Quiet.
Batzi, let me.
So you don't want to
tell us where is Shuli, huh?
You don't know us.
We're crazy.
Crazy. -Yes!
We're big motherfuckers.
-Crazy.
Crazy motherfuckers.
-Crazy.
Quiet!
Nati, careful with the knife.
Avihu...
Avihu's crazy.
He feels no pain.
Nothing.
I feel no pain.
Nati.
-Huh, daddy-0?
It's the other leg.
Avihu. -Avihu.
Tell them I'll talk. Tell them I'll
tell them everything!
I'll tell them everything.
Relax.
Where is Shuli,
you motherfucker?
I'll talk-He... -I know,
he doesn't want to say.
He doesn't know who's
Betzalel, where is Shuli?
Where's Shuli?
-I'll talk!
Now he told you!
You think he's good?
-I'll talk.
Yes.
Let's go, let's see the city,
come on.
After that, we'll
free Shuli.
We got him!
You're an Israeli soldier?
Yes.
Yes, soldier.
Put it together.
You're sure you're
a soldier?
Yes, yes.
You're not a soldier.
Yes, yes.
Yes, soldier, yes.
I'm a hairdresser.
In Tzrifm
you know, I work every other week.
I can give you a...
a haircut.
No, no, no, no!
You want some highlights?
I can give you some highlights.
I can give you...
Please no...
You have to... No, no...
I can give you... No...
Say, Nati, are you sure you
know where we're going?
That's what Ricardo said.
He said he sold Shuli
to Hernan's cartel.
And where is that?
I don't know he told me to go
into the heart of the jungle
pass Santa Shmarta
you'll find it a bit after
the lost city.
But the lost city,
how will we find it?
Hi, here's that blogger.
Jesus Christ on a cracker!
-Hi Coral and the Yemenites!
I can't believe it.
What are you guys
doing here?
I'm live with my followers
drinking some Lassi.
What? What...
What are you
drinking daddy-O?
Mango, Passion fruit,
CBD, hash, and a dash of MD.
Give me some. -No...
-Batzi...
Batzi, what are
you doing?
The mango is really
over powering.
Tell me just a second,
you strange girl
of a lost generation,
where is the lost city?
You go here down the stream.
-Yes. at the stream, right or left?
Right?
No, it's the Lassi.
This Lassi made
so horny.
Honey, be with me,
focus.
Avihu, Avihu, come here for a second.
-She's not helping me.
But she's not helping me.
-It's almost nighttime.
It will be dark in a minute,
let's take a breather.
And besides, you're
missing a leg.
And a kidney.
You know, haste makes waste.
Look what we brought!
Batzi, you want
some bat?
No, daddy-O, it
isn't Kosher.
Why not? It doesn't have
cloven hooves.
But it has a cloven wing.
Did you hearthat?
I said "cloven wing"
Avihu, you want some
wings? -No.
Why not? -Try some bat,
you'll go batshit crazy for it.
I'm going to get some wood.
It took me so long to
catch this bat for us, Avihu!
Anyway, there's a big place’
in Israel called "Nafis"
Me?
Good evening.
Hi there...
Anna Maria.
Imma Avihu.
But careful, I'm
after heart surgery.
Nati, Batzi,
you won't believe what just
happened down the stream.
Batzi, Nati, you won't believe
what just happened to me.
I was with a girl,
you won't believe it.
She was such class, wow, the
things she did to me,
wow, that was something. Six months I
haven't been with a woman like that.
wow, the things she did to me,
I've never seen such a pretty girl.
Pocahontas,
mixed with Orna Datz.
Pocahondatz.
Wow, the things she did to me.
Unbelievable, unbelievable.
What a night, Avihu, What a
night, what a night.
Wow.
Look, I'm all goose bumps,
Wow, such goose bumps.
ow, I'm still feeling
those goose bumps.
It's like sparks, sparks.
Wow you don't get it. Gosh golly
jumping Jesus on a stick.
She spent four hours
licking my ear.
Wow, wow.
Batzi, Nati.
Nati.
G'morning. -G'morning.
-G'morning daddy-O.
G'morning, chiquitita.
But I don't get
why can't I come with you.
Corachel, I told you.
I'm afraid something
might happen to you.
Here, I've said it, it's out there:
I care about you.
But I served in the military
for three years.
It's too bad, I can... -Corachel,
the jungle is no place for a woman
If we need a girl
that can make some coffee for the
cartel commander, well let you know.
But I'm telling you, Batzi.
-If we need a girl,
to harmonize
some songs with us,
Well let you know.
If the cartel needs
an Au Pair, we'll call you.
Betzalel... -If they need a babysitter...
-Batzi.
She got it.
We'll call you.
Come one, guys. -Let's go.
-May God be with us.
I need to go, mi amor.
Let's go.
-Corachel.
Ay, ay.
-You're in my heart.
Watch out for yourselves.
-Come on.
Bye, Godspeed,
all the best.
Bye, Corachel.
Go faster, I farted, I don't
want them to know it was me.
We need to pass the
stream and get to the cartel.
Nati, check out what I found
here, Nati!
What's this, what did you see?
-Look at that!
If I'm not mistaken
that's a Cane toad.
What's a Cane toad?
I saw it one on the
National Geographic,
there was a movie aboirt
these frogs.
They give out some
sheer substance,
that if you lick its back
it will blow your mind.
What do you say?
Shall we give it a go, Avihu?
Such bullshit,
licking frogs.
They said in the movie that the natives
lick them, and it gives them strength.
Okay, but we're Yemenites,
not natives.
We're about to face the
most dangerous cartel in the world.
We can't come in dry
like that.
Want to hear the truth
from Nati, Avihu?
I'm scared.
There, I've said it.
I'm scared.
Give it a lick,
it will make you brave.
Here, I'm not ashamed to
admit it - I'm scared.
It will heighten your senses.
It will make us superheroes.
A Yemenite Spiderman.
Yemen-man.
Captain Hawaij.
Khat Norris.
-Jean-Claud van Khat.
come on, Avihu.
Let go of your fear.
Let's see what it does.
Let it go!
I heard you.
Let's lick the frog.
-To Shuli!
Not bad, not bad.
Maybe one lick isn't enough?
To Shuli!
I say, let's lick it again!
Maybe it hasn't woken
up yet?
To Shuli!
Maybe you need to
take it after we eat?
Maybe before?
Maybe we're holding
it upside down?
Maybe it hasn't
woken up yet?
Woken
To Shuli!
Shuli!
I licked it seven
times already.
She didn't lick
me once back.
You heard what
I just told you?
I'm going to unfollow you.
Maybe it's broken.
Yo mama's broken!
Hi!
Talk nice, I'm not
you girlfriend.
Excuse me.
You remind me
of someone.
Wow, who do you
remind me of?
Wow, you sing
so beautifully.
Wow, someone left
some macaroni here.
Damn you too...
I'm going to
take a leak, Avihu.
Wow you sing so beautifully,
I'll make a star out of you.
I'll take you on tour.
Even on my Bar-Mitzva
I was less sober.
My love...
Hi daddy, so hot...
Hi ladies,
Betzalel will show you
around the forest.
Wow.
Nati...
Say, did your frog stop
singing as well?
What frog, Avihu?
I'm having the best macaroni
I've had my entire life.
What macaroni are
you talking about, Nati?
It's...
Those are worms.
Jumping Jesus Jones!
Batzi, Look what...
B... Batzi
Nati, Avihu!
I'm going to blow off some
steam with Miss Colombia.
Nice!
-All of this daddy
Nati, Avihu, come here!
We're going to
the cartel.
We're going to kill Hernan.
Nice! -Batzi,
what are you doing?
Nice!
Ni...
Ouch, ouch, ach...
Wait a minute.
Okay, let go daddy-O.
Where are we, Avihu?
Okay. -Okay
Okay
Sir,
they played with frogs.
That one, he tried
to rape me.
They want to kill you, Sir.
I heard them talking,
they want to kill you.
So you want to kill Hernan.
No. -No.
-Who's Hernan? No.
What Hernan? -We don't
know any Hernan.
Hernan!
Let's see who kills who.
Let's play a game.
What does he want me to do?
-Don't take it, Avihu, don't take it.
Avihu, don't touch it.
No, no...
Avihu, don't touch
the gun!
Avihu.
What do you want me to do?
What do you want...
He wants to play
Russian roulette!
He wants to play
Russian roulette!
Avihu,
Batzi. -Avihu.
Avihu.
Avihu,
Avihu. -If anybody has to go,
God bless my Shuli, it's me.
Tell Shuli I love him.
Batzi, batzi, I'm sorry.
Betzalel.
Betzalel.
Batzi.
Sweet Jesus.
Sweet Jesus.
Tell Andrea...
That she touched Betzalel's
heart deeply.
Sweet Marry mother of Jesus.
Okay, Okay
You're Okay.
Shhh... Shhh...
I'm scared.
What..?
I'm sorry Nati.
Why is he doing this
to us, Nati?
Nati.
Avihu.
Yes, Nati?
Betzalel.
Tell Corachel...
That I've fallen in love with her.
-Well tell her.
I got a crush on her.
Nati.
Oh...
I'm post heart surgery.
I'm out of luck.
Nati. -Look I'm telling you
I can continue like this. Nothing.
Nati. -Nothing,
I'm just not lucky.
This guy, he's lucky.
Quiet! -Okay, asshole.
Quiet! -Okay!
-Okay, Okay!
Excuse me, excuse me. -Where
to put... -Calm down!
Okay, relax, relax,
relax!
Calm down! -What's
your deal?!
Where are we going
to run to the stream?!
Close them
I have a handicapped
permit you asshole!
Shut you, clown.
You asshole sons
of bitches!
You'll pay for this
in your next life.
Does it take one or two
incarnations for these Goys.
What? -Don't swear at him,
Batzi, Jesus is awesome.
Dad?
Shuli...
Shuli...
Shuli?
Nati?
Betzalel?
Shuli...
Dad. -Shuli.
This is the last time you run
away from home like this!
Shuli! Avihu, calm down!
-Avihu, Avihu!
If you ever set foot on an airplane
again, I don't know what I'll do!
Not even on a crop duster
you're not going to get on one!
Avihu, calm down, untie the kid!
-Shuli!
Untie the kid!
Shuli.
Shuli, daddy is here.
Daddy is here.
Give him some air,
give him some air.
Untie the kid.
Free the kid, pick him up.
-Shuli.
Free the kid. -Help me
lift the... This thing.
Help me with the rope -Wait,
wait, wait -Help with the rope!
Help me with the rope!
Avihu, calm down, Avihu,
calm down just a minute.
I can't breath, I'm post heart surgery,
I'm not well I have to sit down.
Relax, relax, relax.
Shuli, bless your soul!
Jesus Christ on a popsicle stick.
Sweetheart.
We found the kid.
The trip is over.
-Gold almighty.
How do we get out of
here now?
How do we get out of here
now? -How do we get out of here?
How do we get the kid out?
What... -How do we
sneak him out?
Wait, not now, one second.
We're getting out
of here -Wait, just a second.
One second... Now
this one too...
One second...
Anna Maria!
Anna Maria!
It's the pretty girl I told
you I met last night by the stream.
Anna Maria,
what are you doing here?
I don't want my
dad to kill you.
Let go of the kid
for a moment.
Hernan is your father?
Yes, Hernan is my father.
Hernan Antonio Rodrigez Banderas
Del Mar Londonios Pica Gomez.
Is this a name or the list of
players of Real-Madrid?
Maria, Maria.
You must take us out, please.
Not now, not now.
Not now, Anna.
Open the... Open the...
And then...
Wait a second...
She's opening,
she's opening it.
Shuli...
-She's opening it.
She's opening
Batzi -Just so you know, thanks
to you, Betzalel discovered Colombia.
The women here, Shuli,
what women!
Careful, careful.
-Come, daddy-O, come.
Come, daddy-O, come. -Careful.
-Slowly, slowly.
Come, Avihu,
Thank you, Maria.
Quick, go! -Yes!
Will I see you again?
I will find you on Facebook.
I don't have Facebook!
-She doesn't have Facebook.
I'll find you on Instagram.
I don't have Instagram.
I'll find you on Twitter.
I don't have Twitter.
I'll find you on Waze!
Wait for me.
Careful, careful,
he's still weak.
Careful.
Quiet, the guard, quiet.
The Jachnun finally picks up>
the phone! -Hello, Eti.
This train has left the station, I'm
leaving you. -Now isn't a good time, Etty.
Etty! -I met this
fitness instructor.
He's only half Yemenite. -Here, do me
a favor, you talk to her.
I've had enough of this...
Guys!
Sorry, sorry!
Don't be scared.
What will become of us,
-Don't be scared.
Don't be afraid, don't show
them you're afraid.
Don't show him you're
afraid.
They are like dogs,
they can smell fear.
Be a proud Yemenite, always.
What do you think?
We're going to get out of this?
I don't see how, you
already have one foot in the grave.
Did you hear what I just told him?
I heard you, I heard you.
Corachel?
Andrea!
Is this Corachel
or Corambo?
It's Corocky!
One, two, three!
Almog, now!
Corachel!
Corachel!
-Thank God!
I kept trying to tell you, I was in
a commando unit for three years.
Corachel!
Praise almighty God!
My sweetheart, honey.
Avihu!
Anna Maria.
Avihu. -Maria.
-My love. -Maria!
God! -I love you!
I can't believe it,
you superhero!
Wow this is my best
selfie ever.
Take the picture already,
you chewed my ear off.
Say "Shuli".
Shuli!
Headline: the biggest drug cartel
in Colombia brought down by Israelis
Licking frogs, they
took my kidney.
You won't believe it, even if
you see it in a movie, Udi.
Batzi, what did you
do to your hair?
Nice, huh?
Andrea asked me to do
When did she ask you?
Last night, a minute ago.
"Batzi, I love you"
"But I need you to be
straight with me."
What? What is she saying?
-What is she saying?
Just a second, one
second.
Shi ri, please translate what
did she say?
"Betzalel, I love you"
"But I want you to straighten
you hair"
Nice!
Betzalel is in love,
Betzalel goes straight.
Got him hard, this Andrea.
Nati...
I have something
to tell you.
Corachel...
I can't believe it.
-Yes!
Corachel!
You bought a Thermometer!
She wanted straight,
straight.
Sweet lemony Lincoln, look
at this thermometer.
I think it's digital.
Nati, it's a pregnancy
test, you pee on it.
Jumping Jesus Jones!
What? No. -What's all this excitement
about, what did I miss?
Nati...
We're pregnant.
Congrats, daddy-O, you're going
to be a daddy! -You're going to be a dad.
Dad?
That's more exciting
than a thermometer.
We're pregnant!
My God, Udi, listen up,
Go get the cheapest Arak
you've got.
To Nati! -To Nati!
To Nati and Corachel
that got a perm for Nati.
To you two. You're
going to have a kid, congratulations!
To the kid.
-To the kid.
Let's hope he won't come
out a trouble maker like Shuli.
Shuli is a good kid.
A good kid, good kid, yes.
To Shuli! -To Shuli!
-To Shuli! -Nice!
Where is Shuli, actually?
When abroad, to clear
his head a bit.
What? -Abroad?
-What is he saying?
What did he say?
-What did he say?
What did you say?
-What abroad?
What did he just say? -"Clear his head"?
We just got back.
Relax, relax.
-What is he saying?
Relax, what are the chances
something like this will happen again?
Everything's fine.
Knock on wood.
Here that must be him,
see how he's responsible.
Shuli bless your heart, how
are you? It's daddy.
Dad...
I think I got
kidnapped.
Again.
Ouch!
You need someone
that tells you now...
Turn off the game, I want
to watch a cooking show.
What's up?
You need someone...
You need a girl that for her
you'll love that stupid game^
where you throw the ball
and then you keep going like that....
We got him.
We have to jump him.
Take him to a girl...
Zion you're an idiot.
Listen, you're an idiot.
You need someone that
tells you she's out of smokes.
Ana an han
You go and get her cigarettes. «•»« i
Nothing compares to
Ofra she was the one and only.
Poor thing, died of the flu. Pro
Ofra Chaza died of AIDS.
What?
-Bad trip.
I had a thing with her
in the 80's.
With Ofra Chaza?
The other one who
was her rival, what's her name?’
Yardena Arazi?
Yael Arad.
That bread would be
Kosher for Passover.
Take 2.
To smoke a joint with Liberman.
"I'm done."
"I need some cheese puffs"
To learn how to Whistle.
I went for the whistling.
You're a very
strange Mizrahi.
Look at me I have goose
bumps, crazy goose bumps!
Wow, such goose bumps.
Sparks, sparks.
What a girl, and for free!
Didn't ask for one cent!
For half an hour...
The things she did to me.
Sweet Joseph, the things
she did.
Action!
You son of a...
What happened?
What happened? You hit me
with the gun that's what happened.
Gram? Camera man, you
want a gram?
There's nothing to be done, Avihu. '
There's lots to be done.
Look at that idiot,
massaging my wooden leg.
My name?
Shuli.
Hoolli. -No.
Not Hoolli, Shuli.
Julie?
-No, Shuli, Shuli.
Shuli. -Shuli.
Yes Shuli. -Shuli
What's your name? -Andrea.
-Andrea.
Good name, I like Andrea.
-Yeah...
You want to do the...
The Titanic?
Yeah, yeah, let's do the
Titanic. -Okay.
You here.
-Yes.
And I like that.
You know...
Come, come, want to
drink something?
Yeah. -Yeah?
-Yeah.
Okay, let's drink.
What do you want to drink?
Okay, I know, I know,
excuse me, you have Arak?
Arak, something like that. -Beer?
Give me this, the big, the big.
Beer, Whiskey?
-Ah, Whiskey, yeah
It's 200,000
-Take it, alright.
Hi you know, I can
do like this.
Yeah, look.
-No, no, no!
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
-No, no!
Present for you.
-Thank you, for me?
Yeah, for you. For me?
For me. For you. -Wow!
Big spender!
-Yeah, Andrea, you know,
I have a very, very, famous
and rich family
in Israel. -Really?
-Yeah.
So you want to go for a walk
in my neighborhood?
For your neighbor... Si.
-Yeah, over there.
Yes of course, yes.
Come on, let's go!
United King Films Present
You live here?
-Yes, you like it?
Nice.
You like it.
-Very. Very good, yeah, very good.
Hello.
How are you, friend?
Give me the keys, now!
Keys! Wallet! -Okay.
You want me to shoot you?
The backpack! The backpack!
-Okay.
Julietta, step back.
Give me the backpack, you've
already lost it, hurry up idiot!
Okay. -Do you think
I'm joking around?
Here.
-Show me.
Here.
Shit!
Fuck.
Fuck.
Fuck.
לשחרר את שולי LeSachrer et Shuli
SAVING SHULI
You piece of shit.
Look.
He's Israeli, look,
Shuli Kahalany.
What do you want?
So your dad has money.
What?
Babe, how do you say Rich?
-Rich.
Father, your father...
He's rich?
Yes, yes, yes, very rich.
Very, very rich, yes.
Babe, we struck gold,
how about that?
My fine thing
I knew this fine ass
would make me a millionaire.
Daddy.
Twenty five shekels
for a haircut?
Damti, I don't have that kind
of money. Do I look like Omer Adam?
Twenty five shekels.
Nati, Nati...
Damti here wants 25
shekels for a haircut.
Did you lose your mind,
what do you mean 25 shekels?
Do you think he has
that kind of money?
It's just 25 shekels,
what's the big deal?
Udi, Udi, Udi...
Do me a favor,
stay out of this.
What did your dad do, some
snipping noises with the scissors?!
Isn't that so,
Betzalel?
What do you say, Tamara?
After the head massage...
Do you feel like going for
a little walk with Beztalel?
What was that good for?
Why are you like that?
Cool down a bit, this is 2020.
Here you go, dry
yourself up.
No need, you left me
hanging as it is.
Batzi, come here.
We need your negotiation skills.
Come here, Damti is
trying to trick us.
Why are you wet?
The washer pulled a "Me
douche" on me.
Put water in my ears,
I can't hear a thing.
Tell me, Avihu,
if the washer quits,
and another washer replace her,
does the old washer throw her a shower?
Did you hear what I just
told him Betzalel?
I can't hear, she put water in my ears.
Don't you get it?
Batzi, Batzi, Damti here,
wants to buy himself a penthouse
* He wants me to pay him 25 shekels
for a haircut.
75 shekels for a haircut?
Damti, did you lose you mind?
-No.
Does he look like Eyal Golan,
carrying around money like that?
From what I see here,
I think...
More or less...
-Give or take...
Twenty five shekels.
Twenty five shekels.
Nice!
I'm surrounded by morons.
Surrounded by idiots.
Hello, who here is Avihu
Kahalani?
Avihu.
If it's about the
property tax...
I know I listed my apartment
as a synagogue,
But next week, God willing,
we're bringing in a Torah.
Next year, for Yom Kipur
you're all invited!
God willing.
-No guarantees.
It's about your son, Shuli.
I'm afraid I have
some bad news.
Shuli?
Here you go, he's waking up,
Avihu?
Mr. Kahalani.
What happened?
He's waking up.
Calm down, Avihu.
-It's not a dream.
Calm down, it's not a dream.
-It's not a dream.
Look, look, look, look.
It's not as bad as it sounds.
Really?
All the kidnappers want is money.
A ransom.
Usually the sums
are quite low.
Fifty grand...
Oh boy...
I'm not feeling well.
-Oh boy...
I'm not feeling well, holy moly.
Calm down, Avihu.
-Holy moly I'm not well.
Avihu, calm down.
It's bad for your blood pressure.
You just had heart surgery.
Here, drink something, calm down.
Calm down, Shhh...
It's cold, the tooth!
You didn't fix the cavity?
Haircut and fix my tooth?
Who am I? Static and Ben-El?
Avihu, Avihu, go home,
have some rest.
Take care of your teeth, and let the Ministry of
Foreign Affairs take care of everything.
We know how to
handle these things.
Yes, I saw how you handled
Gilad Shalit.
That was The Ministry of Defense.
Five years the boy was imprisoned,
eating nothing but Hummus,
watching the world cup,
dressed him up like a sissy
and that was a white boy.
Nobody cares about a kidnapped
Yemenite boy.
That's the truth.
Nati, Betzalel...
We're going to Colombia.
Nice!
We're going to free Shuli
and nothing will stop us!
Avihu!
Avihu! -Avihu!
-Avihu! -Avihu!
Look, look, the Israeli flag!
-Calm down, calm down.
Look, the Israeli flag, tell him.
Here, stop here.
Stop right here.
What do you say Avihu,
how much will he charge?
Don't worry about it.
Batzi, what do you say,
how much will he charge?
Just hope that he won't dupe us.
We've been duped!
What are you... Pay him already.
You pay him. You...
We've been duped.
-Here, for your health.
For your health, my dear.
Fuck you. -Have a good afternoon
-Good health.
Fuck you, he tells me.
Where to?
-Hi there.
I'm here to talk with
the ambassador.
Do you have an appointment?
Do you think I need
an appointment?
My son, he's getting whipped
in the Favelas
and you want me to
make an appointment?
Avihu, relax, I'll
talk to him.
Avihu, let me talk to him.
- As if I need an appointment.
Ask nicely, what are you
getting so angry about?
Hi my man, how are you?
We came to free Shuli,
Avihu's kidnapped son.
I'm sorry, you can't come in
without an appointment.
Let me, give me a moment.
-What is he saying?
Let me have a try. You with your nonsense.
Daddy-o, listen up,
how can I score something
around here?
What are you talking about
scoring?!
I want to meet the ambassador
or I'll mess this place up.
Avihu, Avihu,
calm down.
What did this chair ever do to you?
You can't be like that.
-Code 338.
-We came to free the boy not to cause havoc.
Let them run me over.
-Avihu.
You can't do this.
If they won't bring the kid,
they can run me over.
Don't touch me.
-It won't work like this.
Come
You need to be strong. We talked about this.
Patience.
Open up please.
Hello. -G'morning.
-G'morning.
Okay, the ambassador
is currently out of town
he asked me personally.
-Fuck my life, he's not here.
-Here comes a bus
it can run me over -Avihu!
He's a bit stressed.
Excuse him, a kidnapped son after all.
Of course, I understand.
He asked me personally
to take care of you.
I'll take you now to the hotel.
I'll update you on all the
details on the way there, okay?
Okay, it's...
-Nice to me you, I'm Coral.
Nice!
Coral, did you ever think
to Hebraicize it
To... Corachel?
Did you here what I
said to her, Batzi?
To Hebraicize it
to Corachel.
Maybe Coruthy?
Guys, help me out.
Corina.
Corona.
Corenough, take your stuff.
-Let's go.
Come, the car is
here at the back.
Cute, this Corachel
girl, huh Batzi?
After you.
Betzalel, what do you think?
Do you think she knows
if there's Wi-Fi here?
What Wi-Fi, you didn't
get an internet package?
I used it all up in the plane,
binging on porn.
It's beautiful here, in real life.
Nicer than in Narcos.
Did he end up finding
his mom?
Not Marco, dummy.
"Narcos" with Pablo Escobar, the man.
Colombia isn't just about
"Narcos"
it's a country full of culture,
heritage, art, literature.
You probably remember the picturesque
descriptions of Gabriel Garcaia Maarquez
in his book "One Hundred
Years of Solitude".
Speaking of "One Hundred Years
of Solitude"
Where did Gabriel go
to blow off steam?
I'll give you one...
Relax, what's up with you.
-As if you came here to party.
God help me, what a city.
God knows where well find him.
You called my father?
He hasn't eaten in three days.
What are you planning
to do about Shuli?
The kidnappers didn't
contact us yet.
But it always takes three, four
days for them to contact.
They do it to intimidate.
He's lucky his mom isn't alive.
He brings us nothing but worries.
I'm sorry, I didn't know
you were a widower.
I wish I was that lucky.
I'll give you one!
Relax what's with you?
-You're all over my case since we landed.
Batzi's wife is Avihu's sister.
Oh, you're brothers in law?
That's nice.
-Unfortunately.
What's your wife's name, Betzalel?
Batzi's wife has two names:
Etti and Margalit.
Oh, so how do you call her?
Hitler.
Ouch! -Enough already!
-Can you just leave me be?
Get off of me already!
You're scaring Corachel, enough!
Leave her alone, she's not going
to want to help save Shuli!
You broke his fan.
Here, you broke the driver's fan.
-Me, me, me, it's all me.
You, yes, you.
-Yes, me.
What about you Nati,
you're not married?
I'm single as a butterfly,
sting like a bee.
Ay!
Betzalel, do you have any kids?
No.
What do you mean "No"?
Vardina, Zohara and Hadassah.
I thought she meant boys.
Be grateful you don't have any boys,,
they only bring trouble.
So I understand that Shuli
didn't get insurance.
No.
Problematic kid.
Okay, the Ministry will help to cover expenses.
Where are you staying?
Casa Yiftach.
Casa Hilton. -Casa Hilton.
Oh, at the Hilton?
Don't worry, Corachel,
we came to free Shuli.
We won't go overboard.
Nice!
He gives me an invoice: Due net 30.
Now I already paid VAT
on the 15th.
One...
Two...
Nice!
Nice!
Nice!
Mr. Betzalel...
We're in Colombia for 24 hours,
no sign of Shuli.
Instead of searching for him,
we're here partying.
Getting wild with an ass.
What's going on in there?
What a night, Avihu, wow!
It was a Pony.
I'll smack your head!
Relax, Avihu.
Corachel said the kidnappers
will contact us.
There's nothing we can do.
-There's lots we can do.
We need to go out,
ask people.
What do you want,
that we just roam the streets
asking people if they saw Shuli?
-Yes.
Did you see Shuli?
Napo, did you see Shuli?
Good morning. -Good morning,
Corachel, did they call?
Is there a sign of Shuli?
The kid is gone.
Stop, please, stop.
Okay? Stop.
My son also...
They say "My son", but
we don't know where he is.
That poor kid is in the Favelas
and we're partying here
with a bunch of sissies.
The kid is gone.
Avihu, relax, you're
after a heart surgery.
Stop! Okay don't touch me.
They keep touching me.
Her too, for an hour now
she's massaging my wooden leg.
There's nothing we can do, Avihu.
-There's lots to do, okay?
There's lots to do.
To go, ask people, gather around,
score something.
Score something? Sure.
Gram? Nathaniel? Gram?
Napo, gram?
Gram? Corachel, gram?
Gram?
Natalia, gram?
Gram?
Gram? Anybody wants
a gram?
Fine, fine, fine,
this idiot doesn't want to eat
I'll make him eat this.
You're going to eat this.
-No, no, no
Open your mouth, open mouth,
open up! -Please, no!
That idiot son of a bitch!
Come here, calm down.
It's all good, man.
We're going to
his dad
well collect the money,
and we'll relax, okay?
Avihu, what's wrong Daddy-O?
You look like you've been
stood up on your birthday.
Yes, Avihu, what's wrong?
We're not used to
seeing you like that.
I'm tired of partying,
I want to find Shuli.
What do you say,
Avihu...
Maybe we can treat you
with something that will relax you,
comfort you with some...
Hawaij and leg soup?
And back, -And head,
-Nail, -Lungs?
And stomach, -And udder
-And Ear, -And nose -And throat.
No, I don't feel like
eating anything.
They called.
From Telegrass?
-The kidnappers called.
The kidnappers called?
What are they saying? Is Shuli ok?
How is he?
They want to meet.
I have the address right here.
I've already told the ambassador, he called
the police and they're sending someone
No police and no nothing, honey.
Batzi, come on, we're going.
I'm good with negotiations.
-Wait, I'll come with you.
I can speak Spanish and in the
military I also served as...
Corachel, sweetheart, I don't have
time to take care of someone else there.
Okay? I don't have the
headspace forthat.
Stay here with Nati, he
has migration anxiety as it is.
Batzi. -Separation anxiety.
Tell her about your
separation anxiety.
Batzi, are you sure
this is the right place?
Relax, daddy-O, drink some
water, you seem tense.
Ouch my tooth.
-You didn't fix the cavity?
When exactly, during the flight?
-Shhh....
"Take care of the cavity"
he tells me.
Batzi, look at his tattoos.
This is Colombia, everybody has tattoos,
it's for show.
Avichu.
Avihu.
You're Hully's dad.
Batzi, ask him if
Shuli is okay.
Shiri, how are you honey?
Ask him please in Spanish,
if Shuli is OK?
If the kid is feeling nice?
The boy is a man.
He eats?
What? -What. He didn't
understand.
Shiri, what do you don't
get? Ask him if the boy is alive.
The boy is alive?
-Yes, yes, yes.
Look.
Look at the boy.
Shuli.
I want Shuli!
I want Shuli!
Please.
If you want him, it will
cost you 20 thousand dollars.
What is he saying?
Batzi what is he saying?
If you want him, it will cost
you 20 thousand dollars.
twenty thousand dollars?
Batzi, do something. I don't have
20 thousand dollars.
Relax, relax, it's the
basics of negotiation,
he's stalling.
Are you sure?
-Yes, what are you stressed about?
look at him with his
dried prune face
I'll fart on his face in a second.
He should be thankful to get a hundred
pesos and slap across the face
Relax, that's negotiating.
He's stalling.
What are you stressed about this dried
up prune -Stop it. -Batzi.
Shut it up, Batzi. -Shut up!
-In a second...
I fart on his face. -Batzi.
-He should be thankful
if he gets a hundred pesos
and a slap across the face.
So can we Venmo you?
It's already night time,
how are they not back yet?
Relax, Corachel,
I know Batzi,
they probably already
got the kid
And went to blow off steam
all together.
You're not worried?
The only thing I'm
worried about
is that I'm not with
them blowing off steam.
Although I rather stay
here with you.
How come you never
got married, Nati?
I don't know.
I never managed to score.
And don't you want a family?
You don't want to have a kid?
A kid, no.
But lately I've been
feeling ready for a grandchild.
Did you hearthat?
I said "ready for a grandchild"
I'm looking for a
surrogate grandma.
Wow!
You're like a fountain.
They should put you in
the middle of a piazza.
You crack me up.
As long as you're
not an egg that cracks.
What about you, Corachel?
Not ready for a child,
grandchild, great grandchild?
I actually really want kids.
-Oh yeah?
But maybe now just
isn't the right time.
It's difficult to have a
career and to raise a kid on my own.
What are you talking
about, Corachel?
A girl like you opens
up Tinder,
They're going to line up
like at a dispensary
Did you hearthat?
Like at the dispensary.
A girl like you opens
up Tinder,
You won't sleep at night
from all the notification bells.
What is she saying?
Alone? Who's alone?
What is she saying? What
is she saying?
I don't know, whenever
I wanted someone
something always got in
the way in the last minute.
What can get in the way?
All you frustrations...
-Mommy!
All of your frustrations
you take them out on me!
What did I do?
What's that? What happened?
Did you get robbed?
Avihu, how did it go?
The kid is gone.
The kid is gone.
We had some disagreements
with the kidnappers.
We proposed one thing
and they proposed to take
all of our money and clothes.
Why? Because of Batzi.
Batzi had to push it
and show off.
And that's why the
kid is gone.
That's it, gone,
he's done.
Avihu, relax, nobody is done,
let's keep things in perspective.
I too lost something precious.
I lost my Rolex.
You lost your Rolex.
-Yes!
He lost his Rolex.
It's a very precious thing.
Ouch!
Avihu, let go!
Avihu, not with this!
You piece of crap, lost his Rolex.
-Avihu calm down.
Avihu I'm allergic to melons!
Ouch, the head, Avihu!
Stop it, Avihu, the girls,
it's embarrassing!
Come here!
-Ouch, stop it, Nati!
Maybe you can separate them?
You're right.
Nati, help me, Nati!
Nati, I don't... Nati!
-Come on, let him go!
Are we here to fight?
What's the matter with you?
Nati.
Stop it! Stop it!
Ouch, stop it!
Ouch! Ouch!
-More! More!
I'll tear you apart....
-Move! Just a second...
Move him over I tell you.
Avihu, not the TV!
Let go of the TV!
Avihu!
They'll charge us!
Did they pay?
These cheapskates
aren't going to pay.
That's all I got you.
Ricardo, never mind,
Look, next time we'll
get someone with more money.
But let's let this dumbass go.
Free him? Will you
listen to that...
Look what's going to
happen with this dumbass!
No, no!
-No, no...
I can't let him go,
he saw my face
He saw our faces.
-No, no.
Goodbye, my man.
-No, no, no!
Ricardo, please, no.
-Stop it, stop it!
No, please!
He already saw our faces! What?
-Look, look, look.
Look.
"Shuli served in the Israeli
army, he was a sergeant"
"In the unit for..."
-Oh man...
Is that you bro?
Is that you?
You... You.. Soldier?
You, you soldier.
-Yes.
Yes, very, very soldier.
Kill. Kill.
Yes, yes.
Amazing! Why didn't you
say that before, dummy?
Now we're really going
to get rich, my pretty thing!
This is so good!
My love, listen, I have a friend
that hangs with a group in Santa Marta
They just got some weapons
from Israel.
Maybe they need some idiot
to do their training?
Ricardo, the Israeli army will
come after us. -Shut up, come on!
Chucho!
-Chucho?
Ricardo,
Listen, I have something
amazing for you.
I heard the Revive Project
is doing a duet with Haim Revivo?
The kid is gone.
The kid is gone.
-He's not going anywhere.
He's not going anywhere, Avihu.
It's part of the negotiation process.
They're trying to have the upper hand.
It's legitimate.
They'll come to their sense,
calm down, name their price,
well pay them,
free Shuli.
The kidnappers severed
all communications.
The kid is gone. Come
Nati, we're leaving.
Shit.
It's Eti, my military reserve kit
is in the room, what do I do?
Don't answer it.
If I don't answer her,
she'll call the war room.
What do I do now?
What do I do?
I have an idea, Batzi.
Stand in the sun, it's going to be
so bright, she won't see where you are.
Nati, you're a genius.
Nice.
The sun is here, I need it
to shine right on the phone.
Nice.
Hi, Eti, what's up?
Betzalel where are you
you useless piece of shit!
I'm in the field. It's so
hot, 40 degrees and sunny, so sunny.
What are you talking about, it's 10pm?!
10pm...
There's a time difference...
Stupid, who stands in the sun
when it's 10pm at home.
Where are you,
you Yemenite bastard?
Betzalel where are you?
-Eti it's not what you're thinking.
I can explain.
You're in Colombia?!
Listen up, Eti.
Shuli has been kidnapped.
Your nephew has been kidnapped
and I came here to help out
because I'm good at negotiating.
And second of all...
Wait, how do you know
I'm in Colombia?
How do I know, from your watch.
I can see you're in Colombia,
that's how I know.
From the watch?
You should be ashamed of yourself.
You put a tracker in my watch?
You're following me?
You don't trust me?
I don't trust you?
Who's playing rescue captain
while actually partying in South America?
Wait, there's a tracker
in your watch?
Tell the slut to stay our of it.
She's no slut it's Rachel
from the embassy.
Corachel, now isn't a good time now.
There's a family crisis
with Hitler.
This is a crisis of trust.
Apparently, Betzalel is married
to the head of the FBI.
Agent A from the Mossad.
Avihu, be careful when
'you're eating your Jachnun
make sure she didn't put cameras
in the sauce.
You've been my
wife for 20 years
And you get me a watch
to track me.
Betzalel there's a tracker
in your stollen watch
And now Shuli's
kidnappers have it.
Corachel, stay out of it.
Asking me questions like
we're on jeopardy.
Put me up on "Wheel of Fortune".
Move over, stupid,
Batzi you're a genius!
Give it to me.
Eti, where is the watch located at the moment?
Avihu, what are you
doing there?
Opening a TGI Friday's
in Colombia.
What do you think I'm doing? I'm Freeing Shuli.
-Freeing his kid!
Where do see the
watch on the map?
Selencio... Selento!
Selento, what's Selento?
What did she say? -What's Selento?
-Yes, yes, yes -What did she say?
What did she say? -What is she saying?
-Shhh! Let her talk!
It's a village in the
Cocora valley,
It's a few hours drive
from here, it's the coffee region.
Eti, God bless you, I'm hanging up.
Listen, Corachel,
Batzi, go get the computer.
-The computer!
Come on Corachel, make it snappy.
Nati, let go of Napo.
-What do you mean "Let go"
I have to return him,
he's on my card.
Okay, put him back in the
minibar and come back.
Shuli...
Daddy's on his way.
Shuli...
At the bridge, drive straight.
Batzi, such a radiophonic voice,
you can replace Eliko
Nice.
Help.
Keep right at the roundabout,
and make a hard swerve to the left.
He's a pro!
Avihu, can I ask how come
you have a wooden leg?
Sad story.
-Very sad story.
I lost it on Yom Kippur.
During the war?
During the fast.
He went rollerblading on
the hills of Nes Ziona,
and tripped on a rock,
because he was too stubborn.
Okay. Bye, stay well.
-Bye honey.
Thank you very much.
Look who came
from the big city?
And where's Ricardo?
We're over.
-Over?
You came back with your tail
between your legs.
Thanks for the support, dad.
Did you make some
money at least?
You brought a watch?
"Made by Marmorek"?
It's a knock-off.
It's worth nothing.
You want me to wear
something like that?
What's that? The signal is out.
What do you mean the signal is out?
-I can't believe it. -Show it to me.
Maybe they went into
an elevator?
What elevator, these are all
cabins with two floors.
"Elevator" he tells me.
Maybe they went to
do an MRI?
What do we do now,
Corachel?
Maybe it will come back,
wait a minute.
How about we find a place to stay the night,
wait for it to come back?
We can keep it down to earth,
nothing fancy.
As long as the rooms are clean.
And air conditioned. -And with
a pool. -And a spa.
And shut up!
Good morning to
all of my followers,
And today we are at the
"most amazing hostel in Cocora,
which is the coffee
region of Colombia
And why is it so amazing?
Because I'm here, and you're here/
let's see who else is here “
Anything?
Nothing, nada.
Wow backpacking mid-life-crisis old men.
This is something
I have to see.
What can I do for you?
-Hi there.
Coffee from the
coffee region?
I only drink black,
from the Turkish valley.
Hilarious, old people jokes,
I'm dying here!
G'morning -G'morning -Good morning
-G'morning -G'morning
G'morning.
How did you sleep, Nati?
Like a bear cub.
Want some coffee
from the coffee region?
Couldn't you bring a croissant
from the pastry region too?
Did you hear what
I just said?
Amazing hit me with another
one gramps, let's hear another.
What is she saying?
-What are you saying?
What does she want?jWhat,..^
is she saying?^
Wait a second, honey, what
do you want? -What is she saying?
Wait a second who are
you? -Me? I'm Coral?
Coral, which is like "Airnog"
in English, and I'm Almog.
So what do you want to tell
all the viewers at Almog's Blog?
Hi.
Never steal my
spotlight like that again.
Excuse me?
I can't sit here anymore.
The pain in my tooth.
I'm... this tooth is killing me.
How do we
find the kid?
What do we do?
What do we do?
Ayahuasca.
What?
Ayahuasca. It's this ceremony
some native guy does
and he gives you this tea
and then you can
make some wishes
and then in the end,
there's like a revelation.
What do you say, )
Avihu?
Shall we do an Ayahuasca?
I want to hear... Really,
I want to hear once and for all:
What did we come here for?
I want to hear what did we come
here for? -To free the kid.
I can't hear you Nati,
can't hear you.
Free the kid.
I can't hear you.
-Free Shuli.
Good, so what's this
Kawasaki now?
What's this Kawasaka for?
Huh? -Avihu...
Avihu, daddy-O, open
up your mind.
There are mysterious
things we can't understand.
What if we go to that Ayahuasca
and Shuli will appear in your revelation
and you'll know where he is?
There are things in this world
that are beyond our comprehension.
To this day, I don't
understand why one man is rich
and another is poor.
Why is there hunger?
-Why are there wars?
Why is Avihu mad
all the time?
Free your mind,
daddy-O.
Wait a minute.
Requests for dental care,
is that included in
the Ayahuasca?
Included.
We're doing an Ayahuasca.
7-Nice!
I'm going to change to something nice.
Let's go. -Corachel, we're going to
Alaska with Noa Kirel's daughter!
No, no, I'm not...
Come on, what do you mean no?
Noa Kirel's daughter.
Avner.
Nice to meet you, Avihu.
I don't know what
to ask for.
Health an longevity for
my old and sick mother
yes.
Or to learn how to whistle?
I can't do that crap.
I want my kidnapped
son back, Shuli.
Sixty years, let go
of that already.
The kidnapped Yemenites -
enough of that.
I heard you, I heard you.
What are you kissing his hand
for, he's not a Rabbi.
Batzi, free Shuli, ask
to free Shuli.
Sure.
I want to quit smoking.
You know what? To cut down
to five cigarettes a day.
You know what?
Actually to quit masturbating.
Cut that also to five a day.
Corachel, what are you
going to ask for?
I can't drink that, I'm an official representative,
of the Foreign Ministry.
But if you could,
what would you ask for?
I don't know.
True love, I guess.
It's the ambassador,
one second.
Batzi.
Just a sec.
Take your hands off,
let me drink.
He has lots of requests
that friend of yours.
Just a second, I need a second,
wait a minute.
I need... they're calling me...
That cracker chewed
How long I waited for
this moment.
I haven't eaten
in three days.
Were you too excited?
No, because you're
not supposed to.
Why, did you eat?
I'm such an idiot for
listening to you again,
instead of going to look
for Shuli.
You're going to blame
me again?
Why? Is it my fault
that the he went to Colombia?
You only think of yourself.
You only think of Betzalel.
Makes me want to vomit.
I'm thinking only of myself?
Your irresponsibility
makes me want to vomit!
Ouch. -Please, guys,
enough with the word "vomit"
it makes me actually vomit.
I'm done with you,
I don't want to see your face.
I'm done with you!
I don't want to see you
or hear you.
Another one...
I'm done with myself!
Don't want to see m
or hear myself!
Avihu!
Do an Ayahuasca they said...
What Ayahuasca?!
Go, you'll have a revelation,
you'll get dental work,
The kid is gone for.
Holy jeepers
I hope their not too expensive,
going to tear a hole in my pocket.
You idiot what
did you do to my teeth?
How should I know?
You're the one asking
me to take out the...
It's been so long since
you bought me a gift you cheapo.
You're calling me cheap?!
-Son of a bitch...
Now you're just making stuff up.
Where did you find these swear
words that nobody's ever heard of?
I can't understand you.
Hi. -Hola.
Hello Mister.
I have a... My tooth hurts.
Hole-o, I have a hole-o.
Ay ay ay?
Ay ay ay, hole-o
Yes, yes, yes.
-Yes?
Yes, yes, come here.
Please.
Please, sit?
-Siente?
Yes.
Good.
Hole-o, hole-o.
-Jodido, jodido (Fucked up)
Hurts like hell.
Yes.
Good, very good.
-How much?
Money, money.
-50 thousand pesitos.
Huh cinci cinco?
Fifty thousand pesos.
Fifty thousand pesos?
Yes. -Fifty thousand pesos.
-pesos.
Fifty thousand pesos, how
much is that?
Fifty... That's sixty
shekels.
Sixty shekels, I'll bring over
the entire family from Marmorek
Well get a new set
a-la Eyal Golan!
Okay.
-Okay, okay.
Okay.
-Okay.
You're all set?
Put it out.
Out.
-Out, good.
You ass.
The wrench...
Jeez Louise,
This is a Holy place.
One-two, one-two-one...
Check out this echo,
Avihu.
Nice.
The body of Christ.
The body of Christ.
The body of Christ.
-Corpo Christo.
Nice.
I'm starving.
Body of Christ.
Body of Christ.
Go with it.
Body of Christ.
-Nice.
I thought this was a cracker,
but it's much more...Papery.
Body of Christ.
Allow me a moment.
Body of Christ.
Body of Christ.
Let us pray that
all mighty God
will bestow this child with new life, born
from this water and the Holy Spirit
You know that God, through
the baptisim... -Nice!
Wow, wow, wow.
-Excuse me, Sir.
Sir!
-Quiet, quiet, I'm outtie.
Such a strange Turkish Hammam.
The Turkish lost it since Erdoegan.
What will be with you, Nati,
What?
It's time you have a kid.
Look at Avihu, he'll
do anything for Shull.
Almost anything for Shuli.
Maybe that train
has left the station.
Maybe I can't have kids
anymore?
What do I need to do now?
Do I need to do a sperm count?
How much is a sperm count?
Is it part of my insurance?
Do I need to masturbate now
for my family physician?
Maybe I can count my
sperm myself.
You heard that?
I can't believe it.
If this isn't a sign from God, I
don't know what is!
What's up handsome?
Flipping hell.
Heck, you look
like Napo!
I have a friend,
exactly your size, tiny!
Not your age, he's 50 years
old, but he's your size.
You don't understand
a word I'm saying, huh?
Funny.
Who would have thought,
I'll randomly think of a kid,
and all of a sudden -
I see a kid!
Weird.
Want some?
May I?
Generous heart.
Three "Our father"
and three "Hail Mary".
-Yes.
In the name of the Father,
the Son, and the Holy Spirit.
Where's the bathroom
in this place?
Carpe Christo!
What a weird bathroom, man,
this is a third world country
even in India you have
a hole in the floor.
Someone peeking here?
Country of pervs.
Forgive me father,
for I have sinned.
Continue, please.
I sinned, father.
I helped to kidnap a good
guy for money.
He did nothing wrong, he only came to
travel in Colombia from Israel.
Shuli...
Shuli?
Father, is that you?
Yes, yes, yes.
I'm Poco.
You need to say ten times
"Ave maria"
or twenty times
"Avihu Medina"
Now...
Where's Shuli?
Hello?
Hello?
Sorry, daddy-O
either light up a match,
or wait five minutes.
Where is she? Hello?
Where are you?
Chiquitita!
Just a second,
give me a minute!
Wait...
Gotcha.
Surprising.
Here we go.
Oh yeah...
Batzi?
Wow, wow, wow...
Where did she go?
No!
Disguising.
I can't hear!
I have a surprise for you,
you're going to love it!
I'm giving you the souvenir
Napo left me.
Napo, the little guy
I was telling you about.
Huh? Handsome.
No, no, no! Did you lose
your mind?
You don't eat from the floor,
what's up with you?
Doesn't taste good.
You're hungry?
I have some Jachnun, have some buddy
you can take it all.
You'll love it,
You haven't tried something
like this Jachnun.
Did anybody ever give
you Jachnun in Colombia?
Look where we are
in the mountains
jungles, we can get
eaten by animals.
I wouldn't give it to
anyone but you.
I'm very possessive of
my Jachnuns.
So what do you say?
What do you say? How come,
you don't like it?
Oh, I didn't give you from
the sauce, wait a minute.
I know why you didn't like it.
Look at this sauce I'm going to give
you know, your head will explode.
Come here.
It's spicy! It's spicy, mom!
-What's the matter, too hot?
It's spicy!
-Too spicy?
It's not hot!
It's spicy!
-What's wrong?
Who are you?
Calm down, calm
down, what's the matter?
He wanted me to eat his black
sausage. -What are you saying?
Julio! -Miss, I gave
him some Jachnun.
Julio! -Maybe it
was too hot for him
How are you talking
to a child?
Why are you talking to him about...
-What's up bro?
I gave him some Jachnun,
I guess he didn't like it.
What the hell is the
matter with you?
What are you crazy?
-Spit it out, spit it out.
Spit it out, son.
Spit it out. -Calm down,
Sir, Sir.
I gave him.. -You're in
trouble with me now!
Amazing.
I don't feel a thing.
I don't feel a thing.
"Roca-a-bye on the
tree top"
"When the wind blows... the cradle
will rock" -I can't feel my tongue.
I can't swallow
my spit.
I can't swallow my spit...
I can't swallow the...
I can't feel my glands...
Can't feel...
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
My kidney... What
are you doing?
What are you taking?
This man is nothing
but fat.
He keeps waking up
because of you, cheap bastard.
What are you doing?
He's getting out
of it.
Give him another hit.
What are you doing?
Sorry, poor you.
-What are you doing?
Give him a little bit more.
-G'morning.
Wait -It's not fair.
-Rock-a-bye-baby...
Open your mouth so I can
give it to you -That poor bastard.
I would whip his ass up.
What ass what are
you talking about!
Granny, that's a wooden leg.
Nati!
Avihu!
Nati... -Here he
is, Nati!
Nati...
Avihu...
Nati...
I can't hear...
Nati... -Batzi...
-I can't hear...
Avihu! -Nati...
-Batzi...
Batzi... -Nati..
Avihu...
Avihu, I can't see a thing, Avihu!
Nati...
Batzi...
Dad, are you coming?
Dad?
G'morning! -G'morning Avihu!
-G'morning
Such weird dreams, all
night long I dreamt of Shuli.
So cold here in the mornings
in Colombia, goddam these Colombians.
Here you go Avihu.
What's this smell where
did you get this soup?
What's that? -That's an OG Yemenite leg soup
Here, have a proper wake up
with something warm.
Oh wow!
Batzi, that's some soup,
God bless you.
You're the best!
Wow!
Listen, Batzi, I'm sorry
I yelled at you.
Don't sweat about it.
-This soup is amazing.
Thank you very much.
Where did you
get the Chilbeh?
It's not Chilbeh.
I whipped up some coke
with lemon and ice.
It's cheaper.
Practically addictive.
Did you hear that Avihu?
I said to him "Addictive"
The meat is so tender!
Where did you
get that meat?
It was here in this cooler.
Let go of me! -What's the matter it's
just some soup! -You broke my nose!
What's the matter with you?
-You broke my nose!
My nose, you broke it!
-Enough! Calm down!
What's wrong with you?!
Look what you did to his nose,
look what you did to his nose.
He fed me my own
kidney, Nati.
What more are we going
to go through here?
It's just a kideny, you
want it you can have mine!
What are you
whining about?
I'll take yours now.
-Move over, move!
We'll get back home, I'll give
you whatever you want.
Kidney, pancreas,
liver.
"I made you soup" he tells me.
-You broke my nose, you're crazy!
I broke your nose?! You fed me my own
kidney what are you talking about?
You know that's
not Kosher?!
You know I have to go
and ask the Rabbi now?
Okay, Avihu, relax.
We'll go back home, well get
you some new balls from a bull.
I have to ask the Rabbi
now, I have to ask the Rabbi.
You guys are like family,
what are you fighting about?!
Give me that...
What, just the broth.
Here you are! Where did you disappear
to since the Ayahuasca?
Corachel?
How did you find us like
that in the middle of nowhere?
Why nowhere, the
hostel is right there.
Oh wow is that soup?
Wow, that's some
great soup.
The meat is tasty!
Thanks.
-Thanks.
So, any news of Shuli?
Did you get the watch back?
Not yet.
The kid is gone.
I remember now, listen
for a second!
Nice.
-Batzi, is it this one?
What?
No, no, no.
So where did you say, you saw a girl talking
about Shuli, about kidnapping Shuli?
You know what,
it's my fault.
'You know why it's my fault?
Because I'm sitting here with you
instead of looking for Shuli.
Avihu. -Don't "Avihu" me, I should
know better than listening to you
Avihu I swear do you,
I swear on the bible
that I sat there in the
church's bathroom
and a girl came, she said Shuli's
name and that she kidnapped him.
It was in your imagination daddy-O,
you were high from the Kawasaki.
I wasn't high
and I wasn't imagining it.
Forget about it, let's
say you didn't imagine it,
okay, this is a 200 million
people country,
this isn't Marmorek where you bump
into her and say: Here she is.
Excuse me.
Here she is, Avihu!
Here she is!
Avihu, here's the girl
that kidnapped Shuli!
Here she is!
Run, you're the fastest Nati!
Excuse me, lady.
Run, Nati, run!
You're the fastest!
Quick, let's go, Avihu!
Avihu, she's getting away!
-Stop I'm telling you!
Careful, lady.
-Here she is!
Stop, stop!
-Stop!
Corachel, hop in already!
Go!
Drive already!
Drive faster!
-Hurry up, hurry up!
Here she is! Here she is
over there!
Go, go, faster,
faster!
Here's the kid, go, go! -She turned,
right, she turned right!
Tell him to stop, Nati. -She's going
to run away, hit the gas!
Go!
Here she is! -Here
she is!
Here she is, bless your heart!
Stop! -How much
for the ride, daddy-O?
I'll Venmo you.
Stop!
Let's see you now!
Stop right there!
I'll shoot you, sons
of bitches!
Let's see you know, what's
the matter?
Wait, wait, this is Avihu,
Shuli's dad. -Yes, yes.
He came from Israel
to look for his son.
You know something
about that?
Shuli? -Yes, yes.
-Yes.
I didn't want anything to happen
to Shuli. -Okay.
He's a good guy. A bit spoiled,
picky eater.
But all I wanted was
to make some money.
To help my dad
with the farm.
I didn't want anything
to happen to Shuli.
What did she say? -What
is she saying? -What did she say?
She knows about Shuli.
Knows about Shuli!
We only want information.
-Information.
Information,
Information.
-Yes.
Thank you.
Where is Shuli?
Shuli... Shuli...
Shuli is... in...
Nati!
That was close, huh,
Avihu?
Poor thing, poor girl!
-Stupid!
Come here, come, come.
Come, come to me, come.
I just hope you didn't
overwhelm her -Drink water.
Drink water, drink water.
Drink water.
What's your name Chiquitita?
Andrea Maria Silva Posada
Del Mar Rodriguez Nerjano
That's not a name, that's a full
guest list at a wedding.
Nice to meet you, Betzalel Batzi
Ben Zion Benziahu.
I didn't want to
kidnap Shuli.
Ricardo made me do it.
Everything's alright.
Betzalel is here now.
It's okay.
I'm sorry I attacked you in
the forest. -That's okay.
Here's the watch. -Everything's alright,
everything's alright.
Where's Shuli?
-Avihu!
Tell us where's Shuli! -Avihu, relax!
You're after a kidney surgery!
He's in Santa Marta.
Corachel, go get the car,
we're going to Santa Shmarta.
Santa Marta.
Who cares?
Hi Chucho!
Ricardo, how's it going?
Good, bro. -Brother.
-Let's go.
Julio?
-What?
Meet Ricardo, he's
a friend of mine.
What's up? -Pleased to
meet you my brother.
He brought us an
Israeli solider.
Ah, nice!
Imported goods.
Look what God brought me.
Ciao, Shuli!
Shabbat Shalom!
Corachel, can you tell
the driver to drive faster?
What does he think, that
we're on a family trip?
We have to get to Ricardo
before he sells Shuli to some Cartel
Santa Marta is so beautiful!
Avihu, maybe we go to
a club and blow off some steam?
Ouch! What are you doing?
Andrea said he likes to
go to one of the clubs here,
Maybe we can find him
there and free Shuli.
Sure, for Shuli, sure thing.
Here he is.
He's there.
We got him.
We have to lure him,
take him to some alley,
lure him in there with some
pretty girl and then gang up on him.
So let's send in Andrea.
Andrea? He knows here,
you dummy.
Andrea, we need beautiful
and sexy girls,
but Ricardo knows you.
We need to find one
that you can't resist,
that you go crazy when
you see her.
You need a girl that you
want to eat up all night long,
a girl you would crawl for
in the sewers,
a girl you would forget
Nafis for her
A girl that when she tells you, you
should stop and ask for directions,
you stop...
And ask someone.
Nice.
Someone you would chemically
straighten your hair for.
Someone that when she tells you
seeing you in heels turns her on,
you put those heels.
A girl, that if she tells you she's vegan,
you won't eat meat near her.
Someone that when she tells
you leave that goatee,
you leave that goatee.
A girl that you love so much
that you would drive all the way
to Yeruham to pick up her mom
for Friday night dinner.
Hi guys.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Also wow.
Wait for me in the alley.
Stop him!
You dog!
Careful.
By God be careful.
-Where's Shuli?
Tell them what you
did with Shuli.
I sold him. I sold him
you bitch!
How did you give me up
to these sons of bitches?
Calm down with all
the bitches!
Joselito, relax, I eat
guys like you for breakfast.
She's with me now.
Quiet.
Batzi, let me.
So you don't want to
tell us where is Shuli, huh?
You don't know us.
We're crazy.
Crazy. -Yes!
We're big motherfuckers.
-Crazy.
Crazy motherfuckers.
-Crazy.
Quiet!
Nati, careful with the knife.
Avihu...
Avihu's crazy.
He feels no pain.
Nothing.
I feel no pain.
Nati.
-Huh, daddy-0?
It's the other leg.
Avihu. -Avihu.
Tell them I'll talk. Tell them I'll
tell them everything!
I'll tell them everything.
Relax.
Where is Shuli,
you motherfucker?
I'll talk-He... -I know,
he doesn't want to say.
He doesn't know who's
Betzalel, where is Shuli?
Where's Shuli?
-I'll talk!
Now he told you!
You think he's good?
-I'll talk.
Yes.
Let's go, let's see the city,
come on.
After that, we'll
free Shuli.
We got him!
You're an Israeli soldier?
Yes.
Yes, soldier.
Put it together.
You're sure you're
a soldier?
Yes, yes.
You're not a soldier.
Yes, yes.
Yes, soldier, yes.
I'm a hairdresser.
In Tzrifm
you know, I work every other week.
I can give you a...
a haircut.
No, no, no, no!
You want some highlights?
I can give you some highlights.
I can give you...
Please no...
You have to... No, no...
I can give you... No...
Say, Nati, are you sure you
know where we're going?
That's what Ricardo said.
He said he sold Shuli
to Hernan's cartel.
And where is that?
I don't know he told me to go
into the heart of the jungle
pass Santa Shmarta
you'll find it a bit after
the lost city.
But the lost city,
how will we find it?
Hi, here's that blogger.
Jesus Christ on a cracker!
-Hi Coral and the Yemenites!
I can't believe it.
What are you guys
doing here?
I'm live with my followers
drinking some Lassi.
What? What...
What are you
drinking daddy-O?
Mango, Passion fruit,
CBD, hash, and a dash of MD.
Give me some. -No...
-Batzi...
Batzi, what are
you doing?
The mango is really
over powering.
Tell me just a second,
you strange girl
of a lost generation,
where is the lost city?
You go here down the stream.
-Yes. at the stream, right or left?
Right?
No, it's the Lassi.
This Lassi made
so horny.
Honey, be with me,
focus.
Avihu, Avihu, come here for a second.
-She's not helping me.
But she's not helping me.
-It's almost nighttime.
It will be dark in a minute,
let's take a breather.
And besides, you're
missing a leg.
And a kidney.
You know, haste makes waste.
Look what we brought!
Batzi, you want
some bat?
No, daddy-O, it
isn't Kosher.
Why not? It doesn't have
cloven hooves.
But it has a cloven wing.
Did you hearthat?
I said "cloven wing"
Avihu, you want some
wings? -No.
Why not? -Try some bat,
you'll go batshit crazy for it.
I'm going to get some wood.
It took me so long to
catch this bat for us, Avihu!
Anyway, there's a big place’
in Israel called "Nafis"
Me?
Good evening.
Hi there...
Anna Maria.
Imma Avihu.
But careful, I'm
after heart surgery.
Nati, Batzi,
you won't believe what just
happened down the stream.
Batzi, Nati, you won't believe
what just happened to me.
I was with a girl,
you won't believe it.
She was such class, wow, the
things she did to me,
wow, that was something. Six months I
haven't been with a woman like that.
wow, the things she did to me,
I've never seen such a pretty girl.
Pocahontas,
mixed with Orna Datz.
Pocahondatz.
Wow, the things she did to me.
Unbelievable, unbelievable.
What a night, Avihu, What a
night, what a night.
Wow.
Look, I'm all goose bumps,
Wow, such goose bumps.
ow, I'm still feeling
those goose bumps.
It's like sparks, sparks.
Wow you don't get it. Gosh golly
jumping Jesus on a stick.
She spent four hours
licking my ear.
Wow, wow.
Batzi, Nati.
Nati.
G'morning. -G'morning.
-G'morning daddy-O.
G'morning, chiquitita.
But I don't get
why can't I come with you.
Corachel, I told you.
I'm afraid something
might happen to you.
Here, I've said it, it's out there:
I care about you.
But I served in the military
for three years.
It's too bad, I can... -Corachel,
the jungle is no place for a woman
If we need a girl
that can make some coffee for the
cartel commander, well let you know.
But I'm telling you, Batzi.
-If we need a girl,
to harmonize
some songs with us,
Well let you know.
If the cartel needs
an Au Pair, we'll call you.
Betzalel... -If they need a babysitter...
-Batzi.
She got it.
We'll call you.
Come one, guys. -Let's go.
-May God be with us.
I need to go, mi amor.
Let's go.
-Corachel.
Ay, ay.
-You're in my heart.
Watch out for yourselves.
-Come on.
Bye, Godspeed,
all the best.
Bye, Corachel.
Go faster, I farted, I don't
want them to know it was me.
We need to pass the
stream and get to the cartel.
Nati, check out what I found
here, Nati!
What's this, what did you see?
-Look at that!
If I'm not mistaken
that's a Cane toad.
What's a Cane toad?
I saw it one on the
National Geographic,
there was a movie aboirt
these frogs.
They give out some
sheer substance,
that if you lick its back
it will blow your mind.
What do you say?
Shall we give it a go, Avihu?
Such bullshit,
licking frogs.
They said in the movie that the natives
lick them, and it gives them strength.
Okay, but we're Yemenites,
not natives.
We're about to face the
most dangerous cartel in the world.
We can't come in dry
like that.
Want to hear the truth
from Nati, Avihu?
I'm scared.
There, I've said it.
I'm scared.
Give it a lick,
it will make you brave.
Here, I'm not ashamed to
admit it - I'm scared.
It will heighten your senses.
It will make us superheroes.
A Yemenite Spiderman.
Yemen-man.
Captain Hawaij.
Khat Norris.
-Jean-Claud van Khat.
come on, Avihu.
Let go of your fear.
Let's see what it does.
Let it go!
I heard you.
Let's lick the frog.
-To Shuli!
Not bad, not bad.
Maybe one lick isn't enough?
To Shuli!
I say, let's lick it again!
Maybe it hasn't woken
up yet?
To Shuli!
Maybe you need to
take it after we eat?
Maybe before?
Maybe we're holding
it upside down?
Maybe it hasn't
woken up yet?
Woken
To Shuli!
Shuli!
I licked it seven
times already.
She didn't lick
me once back.
You heard what
I just told you?
I'm going to unfollow you.
Maybe it's broken.
Yo mama's broken!
Hi!
Talk nice, I'm not
you girlfriend.
Excuse me.
You remind me
of someone.
Wow, who do you
remind me of?
Wow, you sing
so beautifully.
Wow, someone left
some macaroni here.
Damn you too...
I'm going to
take a leak, Avihu.
Wow you sing so beautifully,
I'll make a star out of you.
I'll take you on tour.
Even on my Bar-Mitzva
I was less sober.
My love...
Hi daddy, so hot...
Hi ladies,
Betzalel will show you
around the forest.
Wow.
Nati...
Say, did your frog stop
singing as well?
What frog, Avihu?
I'm having the best macaroni
I've had my entire life.
What macaroni are
you talking about, Nati?
It's...
Those are worms.
Jumping Jesus Jones!
Batzi, Look what...
B... Batzi
Nati, Avihu!
I'm going to blow off some
steam with Miss Colombia.
Nice!
-All of this daddy
Nati, Avihu, come here!
We're going to
the cartel.
We're going to kill Hernan.
Nice! -Batzi,
what are you doing?
Nice!
Ni...
Ouch, ouch, ach...
Wait a minute.
Okay, let go daddy-O.
Where are we, Avihu?
Okay. -Okay
Okay
Sir,
they played with frogs.
That one, he tried
to rape me.
They want to kill you, Sir.
I heard them talking,
they want to kill you.
So you want to kill Hernan.
No. -No.
-Who's Hernan? No.
What Hernan? -We don't
know any Hernan.
Hernan!
Let's see who kills who.
Let's play a game.
What does he want me to do?
-Don't take it, Avihu, don't take it.
Avihu, don't touch it.
No, no...
Avihu, don't touch
the gun!
Avihu.
What do you want me to do?
What do you want...
He wants to play
Russian roulette!
He wants to play
Russian roulette!
Avihu,
Batzi. -Avihu.
Avihu.
Avihu,
Avihu. -If anybody has to go,
God bless my Shuli, it's me.
Tell Shuli I love him.
Batzi, batzi, I'm sorry.
Betzalel.
Betzalel.
Batzi.
Sweet Jesus.
Sweet Jesus.
Tell Andrea...
That she touched Betzalel's
heart deeply.
Sweet Marry mother of Jesus.
Okay, Okay
You're Okay.
Shhh... Shhh...
I'm scared.
What..?
I'm sorry Nati.
Why is he doing this
to us, Nati?
Nati.
Avihu.
Yes, Nati?
Betzalel.
Tell Corachel...
That I've fallen in love with her.
-Well tell her.
I got a crush on her.
Nati.
Oh...
I'm post heart surgery.
I'm out of luck.
Nati. -Look I'm telling you
I can continue like this. Nothing.
Nati. -Nothing,
I'm just not lucky.
This guy, he's lucky.
Quiet! -Okay, asshole.
Quiet! -Okay!
-Okay, Okay!
Excuse me, excuse me. -Where
to put... -Calm down!
Okay, relax, relax,
relax!
Calm down! -What's
your deal?!
Where are we going
to run to the stream?!
Close them
I have a handicapped
permit you asshole!
Shut you, clown.
You asshole sons
of bitches!
You'll pay for this
in your next life.
Does it take one or two
incarnations for these Goys.
What? -Don't swear at him,
Batzi, Jesus is awesome.
Dad?
Shuli...
Shuli...
Shuli?
Nati?
Betzalel?
Shuli...
Dad. -Shuli.
This is the last time you run
away from home like this!
Shuli! Avihu, calm down!
-Avihu, Avihu!
If you ever set foot on an airplane
again, I don't know what I'll do!
Not even on a crop duster
you're not going to get on one!
Avihu, calm down, untie the kid!
-Shuli!
Untie the kid!
Shuli.
Shuli, daddy is here.
Daddy is here.
Give him some air,
give him some air.
Untie the kid.
Free the kid, pick him up.
-Shuli.
Free the kid. -Help me
lift the... This thing.
Help me with the rope -Wait,
wait, wait -Help with the rope!
Help me with the rope!
Avihu, calm down, Avihu,
calm down just a minute.
I can't breath, I'm post heart surgery,
I'm not well I have to sit down.
Relax, relax, relax.
Shuli, bless your soul!
Jesus Christ on a popsicle stick.
Sweetheart.
We found the kid.
The trip is over.
-Gold almighty.
How do we get out of
here now?
How do we get out of here
now? -How do we get out of here?
How do we get the kid out?
What... -How do we
sneak him out?
Wait, not now, one second.
We're getting out
of here -Wait, just a second.
One second... Now
this one too...
One second...
Anna Maria!
Anna Maria!
It's the pretty girl I told
you I met last night by the stream.
Anna Maria,
what are you doing here?
I don't want my
dad to kill you.
Let go of the kid
for a moment.
Hernan is your father?
Yes, Hernan is my father.
Hernan Antonio Rodrigez Banderas
Del Mar Londonios Pica Gomez.
Is this a name or the list of
players of Real-Madrid?
Maria, Maria.
You must take us out, please.
Not now, not now.
Not now, Anna.
Open the... Open the...
And then...
Wait a second...
She's opening,
she's opening it.
Shuli...
-She's opening it.
She's opening
Batzi -Just so you know, thanks
to you, Betzalel discovered Colombia.
The women here, Shuli,
what women!
Careful, careful.
-Come, daddy-O, come.
Come, daddy-O, come. -Careful.
-Slowly, slowly.
Come, Avihu,
Thank you, Maria.
Quick, go! -Yes!
Will I see you again?
I will find you on Facebook.
I don't have Facebook!
-She doesn't have Facebook.
I'll find you on Instagram.
I don't have Instagram.
I'll find you on Twitter.
I don't have Twitter.
I'll find you on Waze!
Wait for me.
Careful, careful,
he's still weak.
Careful.
Quiet, the guard, quiet.
The Jachnun finally picks up>
the phone! -Hello, Eti.
This train has left the station, I'm
leaving you. -Now isn't a good time, Etty.
Etty! -I met this
fitness instructor.
He's only half Yemenite. -Here, do me
a favor, you talk to her.
I've had enough of this...
Guys!
Sorry, sorry!
Don't be scared.
What will become of us,
-Don't be scared.
Don't be afraid, don't show
them you're afraid.
Don't show him you're
afraid.
They are like dogs,
they can smell fear.
Be a proud Yemenite, always.
What do you think?
We're going to get out of this?
I don't see how, you
already have one foot in the grave.
Did you hear what I just told him?
I heard you, I heard you.
Corachel?
Andrea!
Is this Corachel
or Corambo?
It's Corocky!
One, two, three!
Almog, now!
Corachel!
Corachel!
-Thank God!
I kept trying to tell you, I was in
a commando unit for three years.
Corachel!
Praise almighty God!
My sweetheart, honey.
Avihu!
Anna Maria.
Avihu. -Maria.
-My love. -Maria!
God! -I love you!
I can't believe it,
you superhero!
Wow this is my best
selfie ever.
Take the picture already,
you chewed my ear off.
Say "Shuli".
Shuli!
Headline: the biggest drug cartel
in Colombia brought down by Israelis
Licking frogs, they
took my kidney.
You won't believe it, even if
you see it in a movie, Udi.
Batzi, what did you
do to your hair?
Nice, huh?
Andrea asked me to do
When did she ask you?
Last night, a minute ago.
"Batzi, I love you"
"But I need you to be
straight with me."
What? What is she saying?
-What is she saying?
Just a second, one
second.
Shi ri, please translate what
did she say?
"Betzalel, I love you"
"But I want you to straighten
you hair"
Nice!
Betzalel is in love,
Betzalel goes straight.
Got him hard, this Andrea.
Nati...
I have something
to tell you.
Corachel...
I can't believe it.
-Yes!
Corachel!
You bought a Thermometer!
She wanted straight,
straight.
Sweet lemony Lincoln, look
at this thermometer.
I think it's digital.
Nati, it's a pregnancy
test, you pee on it.
Jumping Jesus Jones!
What? No. -What's all this excitement
about, what did I miss?
Nati...
We're pregnant.
Congrats, daddy-O, you're going
to be a daddy! -You're going to be a dad.
Dad?
That's more exciting
than a thermometer.
We're pregnant!
My God, Udi, listen up,
Go get the cheapest Arak
you've got.
To Nati! -To Nati!
To Nati and Corachel
that got a perm for Nati.
To you two. You're
going to have a kid, congratulations!
To the kid.
-To the kid.
Let's hope he won't come
out a trouble maker like Shuli.
Shuli is a good kid.
A good kid, good kid, yes.
To Shuli! -To Shuli!
-To Shuli! -Nice!
Where is Shuli, actually?
When abroad, to clear
his head a bit.
What? -Abroad?
-What is he saying?
What did he say?
-What did he say?
What did you say?
-What abroad?
What did he just say? -"Clear his head"?
We just got back.
Relax, relax.
-What is he saying?
Relax, what are the chances
something like this will happen again?
Everything's fine.
Knock on wood.
Here that must be him,
see how he's responsible.
Shuli bless your heart, how
are you? It's daddy.
Dad...
I think I got
kidnapped.
Again.
Ouch!
You need someone
that tells you now...
Turn off the game, I want
to watch a cooking show.
What's up?
You need someone...
You need a girl that for her
you'll love that stupid game^
where you throw the ball
and then you keep going like that....
We got him.
We have to jump him.
Take him to a girl...
Zion you're an idiot.
Listen, you're an idiot.
You need someone that
tells you she's out of smokes.
Ana an han
You go and get her cigarettes. «•»« i
Nothing compares to
Ofra she was the one and only.
Poor thing, died of the flu. Pro
Ofra Chaza died of AIDS.
What?
-Bad trip.
I had a thing with her
in the 80's.
With Ofra Chaza?
The other one who
was her rival, what's her name?’
Yardena Arazi?
Yael Arad.
That bread would be
Kosher for Passover.
Take 2.
To smoke a joint with Liberman.
"I'm done."
"I need some cheese puffs"
To learn how to Whistle.
I went for the whistling.
You're a very
strange Mizrahi.
Look at me I have goose
bumps, crazy goose bumps!
Wow, such goose bumps.
Sparks, sparks.
What a girl, and for free!
Didn't ask for one cent!
For half an hour...
The things she did to me.
Sweet Joseph, the things
she did.
Action!
You son of a...
What happened?
What happened? You hit me
with the gun that's what happened.
Gram? Camera man, you
want a gram?
There's nothing to be done, Avihu. '
There's lots to be done.
Look at that idiot,
massaging my wooden leg.