Saturday Night at the Baths (1975) - full transcript

[music playing]

Hey!

Morning, Steve.

STEVE: Good mornin'.

Hey, I heard it
was a nice day, huh?

STEVE: That remains to be seen.

[dance music playing]

MAN: I hope I'm the first
one here-- [inaudible]

here on the S train.

You know, there's
no [inaudible].

Hey are you guys that are
looking for the accompaniment.



That bag upstairs told
me to come down here.

That bag upstairs is my lover.

That's just an expression.

OK, you play piano?

Play piano?

Hey, you guys can
be straight with me.

What do you mean straight?

You don't have to use any of
that fancy stuff around me.

It's cool.
-What do you mean cool?

It's cool.

I've been around.

I've been around a long time.

It looks like it.

It shows, huh?



So it does.

Wanna check out the
merchandise, right?

Merchandise.

Yeah, but I tell you right now.

I don't go down.

And I don't go for no whips, OK?

I guess [inaudible]
know right up front.

Look, Spartacus,
we really don't

have to see what you look like.

Your magnificence shows through.

Unfortunately, we've
hired a priest who's

left the cloth this morning.

And I also play
a terrific piano.

I know that.

Oh, that's a good way
to start my career.

You have to start somewhere.

Continental baths.

[inaudible].

It's very famous.

Oh yeah?

Oh, famous for what?

Decadence.

[music playing]

Hi, there.

You must be here
for the audition.

Yes, I am.

[gasps] I just knew it!

You all look so, so, so
sensitive and these hands!

I can just see scads
of lovely little notes

leaping from those long,
soft creative fingers!

[inaudible].

Do you work here?

Well, you might say that, but
when I meet someone like you,

it's pure pleasure.

And I just love artistic hands!

Can I have my-- my
hands back, please?

I need them to play!

I love to play.

The piano!

Are you here to play piano?

Yes.

Good luck, dear.

And if they don't
want you, I do.

Just rap on room 346.

But be gentle.

[piano music playing]

Is that the kind of thing you
mean, like modern popular night

clubbing?
MAN: Yeah, yeah, that's it.

Play it.

Oh good.

Play "September Song."

[music - "september song"]

WOMAN: Oh darling,
that's lovely.

Can you play "Love Story"?

Play "Love is Blue."

Bitch.

[piano music playing]

OK, what'd you
say your name was?

Uh, Micheal Lawrence.

Michael Lawrence.

Yeah.

Congratulations.

Scotti!

Scotti's my manager.

He's gonna work out the
details with you, OK?

OK.

Michael , am I
glad to meet you.

The job pays $150 for the show.

Is that OK with you?

Terrific!

That's great.

But that includes
two rehearsals.

-Fine.
-Fabulous.

Let's go over here and talk.

OK, Michael.

This is the rest of your music.

I suppose you've
worked in enough clubs

to know what to do.

By the way, where
have you played?

Uh, a couple of places.

Any place in particular?

I'm from Montana and I've only
been in New York a few months.

You should have no
trouble handling the show.

OK.

I hope so.

What time's rehearsal?

11 AM sharp.

Wait a minute.

I didn't get your
name and address.

Oh, right.

Michael Lawrence,
L-A-W-R-E-N-C-E. Uh, 989-4720.

110 South Houston Street.

Fantastic.

You live in SoHo.

Yeah.

A friend of mine is
opening up a gallery

in your neighborhood tonight.

Drop by.

Well.

You'll meet some very
interesting people

and it'll give us a chance to,
uh, get to know each other.

Well, if I can, you know.

No matter.

If you're busy, you're busy.

Say, I get off work
in a half hour.

If you can, uh, stick
around, maybe we

can grab a bite to eat.

No, listen--

There's this fantastic
Italian place--

My old lady's
expecting me home.

Your old lady?

You live with your
mother? [chuckles]

No, a woman.

Tracy.

Tracy's her name.

So you live with a girl.

Yeah.

Are you lovers
or just roommates?

No, mates.

Are you married?

MICHAEL: No.

So you're not really gay.

No, I'm not.

Could-- could I have some water?

Sure.

Michael, let me ask
you this right out.

Thank you.

Have you ever made
love with a man?

What?

Have you ever had
sex with a man?

Well, um, sure.

You know, when I was younger.

What do you mean younger?

Well, I had a-- listen,
man, I'd really rather

not talk about it right now.

OK, OK, that's cool.

Do I still have the job?

Are you kidding?

What does sex have to do
with your playing the piano?

Nothing, I hope.

Here nobody forces
anybody do anything, OK?

Don't let the place
get you uptight.

Nobody's going to attack you.

It's just this place
is very strange.

Montana's my idea of a
strange place, Michael.

Yeah, OK, but it doesn't
have all of these lights

and mirrors and waterfall and--

Queers?

Yeah.

We call them fags in this city.

I guess that's kind of silly.

Hey, look.

You and I have to work together.

I'm in the show too.

I'm the MC.

Oh yeah?

You can still play the piano.

Hey, listen.

I'm always able
to play the piano.

Then I know you'll be great.

Thank you.

Don't thank me.

I needed a piano player.

Oh, listen.

In case you can make that
party, it's at 140 South Houston

Street around 10 o'clock.

Bring Tracy.

I think I'd like to meet her.

OK, maybe I will.

See you later.

Bye.

TRACY: Hi, Michael!

Mm, hey, baby!

TRACY: How'd it go?

What?

The audition!

Oh, it was interesting.

Did you get the job?

You did, didn't you?

Yeah, I did!

Oh, I knew it!

How much?

150 big ones!

Oh, terrific.

You can pay your
half of the rent.

Oh, wonderful.

That makes working with
fags kinda worth it.

Oh, Michael.
Don't be so negative.

You know, a lot of important
people go to the baths.

You [inaudible] and there.

Yeah, it's got to be
different Saturday night.

Yeah, it will be.

I'll be there.

Oh, that'll be nice.

You don't mind?

It won't [inaudible].

No, no.

It'll make me feel
better if you are there.

Why's that?

Well, I don't want to have any
more to do with those people

than I have to.

What's so bad about them?

They're fags.

What could be worse than that?

Michael!

Well, you know, they keep
looking at me, coming onto me,

and making me feel like a woman.

Oh yeah, do they grab ya?

Well, as a matter of fact,
the manager made a pass at me.

He's got great taste.

Well, that's true.

You can't blame him for trying.

You have the wavy blond hair.

Mm.

And those blue eyes.

In fact, I think I want to
get it on with you myself.

Yeah?

[chuckles] Listen, seriously.

How can I get them to
stop coming onto me?

I think it's a matter of vibes.

You might not be sending
out the right signal.

What the hell does that mean?

What's the matter?

I tell you I'm
a little nervous,

and the next thing I know you're
telling me I'm a closet queen.

TRACY: I did not say that.

OK, now let me go.

You're not getting up.

Hey, let me go!

Uh-uh.

Not letting you up.

What-- you don't
think I can break out.

What's the magic word?

I don't fuck with ladies.
That's the magic word.

[laughs]

Come on, let go.

No. [laughs] Michael, Michael!

[laughs]

(GERMAN ACCENT) I
fix the [inaudible].

[laughs]

(GERMAN ACCENT) You
are secure now, huh?

Yeah, I love it.

(GERMAN ACCENT) You--
I got myself a fraulein.

You know, I am not
really a sheik.

My name is Fritz.

I am hiding out
here in the desert.

And you know, I am going
to make you say "uncle.

No, you're not.

(GERMAN ACCENT) Yeah,
you will say "uncle."

No, I won't.

(GERMAN ACCENT) Yeah,
you will say "uncle."

[laughs]

Mmm.

-(GERMAN ACCENT) Uncle?
-No.

(GERMAN ACCENT) No?

TRACY: [laughs]

(SINGING) When you [inaudible].

Uncle?

TRACY: No!

(GERMAN ACCENT) And
are you going to run?

I'll pelt you all
over your body.

You will say uncle.

Uncle.

Uncle!

(GERMAN ACCENT) Uncle?

Cousin?
-Cousin.

(GERMAN ACCENT) Ah.

Say "yeah"?

Yeah.

[laughs] Mmm.

[inaudible]

[gasps] Allah be praised.

The great gate!

[laughter]

But I know why why they
were coming onto you.

Why's that?

They probably heard
how good you are in bed.

You've been writing on
bathroom walls again?

Nope.

Subway.

[laughs] "Michael Lawrence is a
great lay" in fluorescent pink

is roaring up Broadway
right this moment.

[laughs]

Hey.

Hmm?

Tell me about the manager
that's coming onto you.

Oh my dear [inaudible]
is four inches long

and the sequin dress and here
all the way to his waist.

[laughs]

He's really faggoty, huh?

No.

Actually he was-- he
was a nice looking guy.

Had on jeans and cowboy boots.

He looked Chris from Montana.

He doesn't sound so bad.

No, he wasn't.

He was the straightest
looking dude there.

Matter of fact,
I'd never known he

was gay except
there was something

in the way he kissed me.

-What was his name?
-Deborah.

[laughter]

No, Scotti.

Oh, by the way.

He told me there's a party
right down the street tonight.

-Oh yeah, party?
-Mhm.

Let's go.

OK.

Can I go?

Oh sure.

He said he'd to meet you.

Well, I'd like to meet him too.

OK, I'll take you
under one condition.

What's that?

We've got to
behave like adults.

Of course.

Ready?

Sure.

Hop on.

MAN: First he takes
off his leather

boots, plastic, Naugahyde.

MAN: Yeah.

MAN: Then he doubles his price.

MAN: Yeah.

Well?

MAN: Well, what?

Then he sanded it down and
painted it henkeek yellow.

MAN: How'd it look?

MAN: Beautiful, and old.

Yeah, they're weird, but I
think I know what he's after.

I know what he's after.

What's that?

A quick buck. [laughs]
Good Lord, look at that.

How could anybody do
that to their bodies?

Oh, here comes the
manager [inaudible].

Hey, Michael.

Really glad you could make it.

This must be Tracy.
-Hi.

Don't say a word
about the pictures.

This is the photographer, Bruce.
-Hello.

It's Michael.
Hi, Bruce.

Hi, Michael.

Hi, Bruce.

Tracy, how are you?

Love your photographs.

Thank you very much.

It's a real hassle, putting
a show like this together.

I know.
I've been through it myself.

I barely make the punch myself.

Oh, it's delicious.

-Hey, you like it?
-Yeah.

-Why don't you have some more?
-[inaudible]?

-Yes, love it.
-Bruce, let me get you a drink.

OK.

A really good thing did
come out of it, though.

What's that?

My agent found
a publisher who's

willing to put a book together.

That's great.

My agent hasn't done
anything for me in ages.

Hi, Scotti.

Hiya, kids.

Well, he was 200
pounds of dynamite.

[inaudible].

You like that, huh?

Mm.

Very nice.

Tracy's lovely.

Oh, thank you.

They're not even sexual.

I don't think sexuality
is their objective.

How do you like Bruce's work.

It's all right.

Do you like it?

With reservations.

I think I know what you mean.

Hey, Scotti, can
I speak to you?

It's kind of important.
-Sure.

I'm sorry, Michael.
Excuse us.

No problem.

WOMAN: Do you honestly
think arms go with punch?

Anybody that spends that much
time developing their body

can't be productive.

WOMAN: Productivity is
socially subjective.

MAN: Any [inaudible] like
that can [inaudible].

WOMAN: Can't the word
"sexuality" [inaudible].

Did you look at him? [laughs]

What's wrong with him?

It's kind of obvious, isn't it?

Well, it's not obvious to me.

Hey, baby, I want to go home.
Hmm?

Oh, don't you want to
stay for a few minutes?

No, I've got a lot of practice
I need to do [inaudible].

Would you mind if I do?

No.

OK.

I'll see you there.

I'll say goodbye
to Scotti for you.

OK.

So long, Michael.

You're not a Virgo.

Right.

And you're not a Capricorn?

Uh-uh.

Taurus?

There's a guy over here
wants to write you a check.

[laughter]

Oh, thank you.

I'll get right over there.

Did you study
photography at Oberlin?

Well, I did-- I
started out as a hobby,

but, um, how'd you
know I went to Oberlin?

Michael told me.

Oh.

By the way, you two
make a beautiful couple.

Oh, thanks, the Bobbsey twins.

Is, uh, marriage in the cards?

--[laughs] Only if my
mother [inaudible].

SCOTTI: [laughs] How
about another drink?

TRACY: No thanks.

I forgot to eat dinner.

SCOTTI: How could you
forget to eat dinner?

TRACY: Because Michael
and I were celebrating

because he got the job.

Oh you were celebrating.

[laughter]

I'm the one that
should be celebrating.

I needed a piano player.

Oh, well, he
won't let you down.

I see.

They were Michael's
favorites too.

He'll be here in a second.

-He's got great taste.
-Mhm.

Hi, Scotti.

Haven't seen you in a while.

It's been a long time, Eva.

Tracy, this is Judith and Eva.

Hi.

What do you do, Tracy?

I'm a photographer.

Oh, Judith and I are models.

We could use some new material.

Would you like to take us?

Sure.

I'd love to.

Tonight?

Well--

[laughs] Sorry, dears.

I'm taking her home tonight.

Oh, well good luck.

Good night, Tracy.

Good night.

Good night, ladies.

Scotti, I've got to go home.

Because if I drink any more,
you're gonna have to carry me.

You may have to carry
me home at this point.

No, no, no.

It's only a couple of blocks.

I'll crawl.

Oh, far out.

I can use the fresh air.

I haven't talked
to a woman in ages.

Oh, [inaudible].

Uh, no. [inaudible].

Uh.

Do you know what
it means to share?

[laughs]

No, but I think it's the guy.

[laughter]

You better [inaudible].

It's from Alabama.

Far out.

See this, one,
two, three, four--

425.

You know how many there are?

Uh-huh.

I live here.

Oh, oh you live here?

-Yes.
-Oh.

We're here.

Yep, you want to come up?

[piano music playing]

That was great!

Thank you.

Guess who I brought home!

I see.

Hi, Scotti.

How you doing, Michael?

Why, I-- I think I'm gonna go
see if there's anything to eat.

--[laughs] Well, how
'bout some eggs?

That sounds great.

TRACY: OK!

I just wanted to see that Tracy
got home all right, you know?

Yeah, it looks
like she needs it.

Thank you.

TRACY: How 'bout omelets?

I'll have a western!

TRACY: [laughs]

Uh, sit down, Scotti.

Thank you, Michael.

Would you like some wine?

Oh, great.

Excuse me.

Sure.

Say, where's the bathroom?

Right here.

Oh, far out.

What'd you bring him here for?

Fill 'er up.

[laughs] Who?

Scotti

Oh, Michael, he's so nice.

He's too nice, you slut.

SCOTTI: Hey, you guys
talking about me in there?

Yep.

Oh, no, just getting the wine.

SCOTTI: You need any help?

No, that's, uh, all right.

Did you really get this
piano for $50, Michael?

Yeah, I really did.

It was a bitch getting
in here, though.

I'll tell ya.

I can imagine.

You play?

I thought I did
until I heard you.

Well, I've been at it
for 15 years [inaudible].

Have you ever played
"The Gape" before?

--[chuckles] Uh, as
matter of fact, I

played it for recital one time.

Far out.

I knew nobody could
sight read that piece.

Ready on the eggs.

So [inaudible].

[chuckles]

These eggs look great.

[laughter]

Thanks I made them myself.

Hey, Scotti, how'd you
get started at the baths?

Well, I met Steve and his wife
one summer out on Fire Island.

Steve's married?

Yeah, he has two children.

Really?

Yeah, quite a few of the
guys at the baths are married.

No kidding.

Well, listen, what do their
wives feel about that?

What do you mean?

What do I mean?

Well--

[laughs]

Don't they-- don't they care?

I really don't suppose
they know, Michael.

Oh, come on, Scotti.

How could they not know?

A lot of guys have mistresses
without their wives knowing.

OK, man, that's a
different thing, you know?

Oh I suppose you're
right, Michael.

You know, as soon as you've
had a gay experience,

it's impossible to
function with women.

--[laughs] Honey,
that's ridiculous.

Have some more wine.

Sure.

You need it.

[laughs] Hey, me too!

Jesus, I've got
a lot of catching

up with you guys to do, huh?

That's OK, Michael.

I've got the ketchup.

[laughter]

Hey, let's get rid
of these plates.

Yeah, let's get
away from these eggs.

TRACY: Ketchup for-- I get it!

[laughs]

Bless her heart.

Hey, Michael?

Hmm?

You know, you should've
stayed at the gallery.

Why's that?

Because the two brunettes.

Yes.

Well, they wanted
to take me home.

Only-- only Scotti
brought me here instead.

Wait a minute, they were gay?

[laughter]

They were women.

[laughter]

How much did you
pay for that, Scotti?

[laughs] What--
what were they like?

Hey.

I don't know.

I didn't get to find out.

[laughter]

They're not to be believed.

You know 'em?

Sure I know 'em.

[laughs]

Wait.

What?

What?

You want their number?

You got it?

[laughs]

I've got it.

You gonna hold that
all day, or you--

I'm sorry.

I got it.

I meant I've got the number.

Who cares?

Scotti, how do you know them?

Huh?

Well, it's a long story.

Oh, I want to hear it!

Oh, once upon a time-- no.

[laughs] Seriously.

Not too long ago, a friend
of mine gave me a call

and invited me
over to his place.

This is an invitation
that I don't turn down,

because every time
I go over there,

there's always something
different happening.

So I arrive.

Never says a word to me,
just smiles, leads me in.

I'm in the living room,
and before my eyes,

those two brunettes
are making love right

in the middle of the floor.

They were so involved, the
lovemaking was so passionate,

that he'd probably been
there and split and seen me

at the door and
gone back, and they

didn't even know he'd split.

The feeling was incredible.

The pull was so intense
that from the moment

I walked into his
place, I was involved.

I mean, I had to become
part of the situation.

There was no way out.

He just sort of left me
there, like to watch,

which was more than
I could handle.

Before I knew it, we were
all involved, a unity,

you know, four people, but
in union with one another.

It was-- I don't know
how to describe it.

It was like, uh,
those rare moments

when with strangers
passion mingles

with love and trust, Michael.

You know?

Scotti.

Yeah?

Uh.

I don't, uh, I don't think
I can handle this right now.

That's OK, Michael, really.

I understand.

I have to go anyway.

Yeah, I really do.

OK.

Good night, Tracy.

Thank you.

Yeah.

Uh, see you tomorrow.

11, right?

Yeah.

Hey, I hope everything
is all right.

Oh, it's all right.

OK.

I'll see you later.

Good night, man.

Michael?

Michael?

Time to wake up.

[sighs]

You up?

Mm.

What time is it?

9:20.

[inaudible].

[sighs]

Hey, I got a terrific idea.

Huh?

I want French toast.

Good.

Call me when they're ready.

[yawns]

[dance music playing]

Steve!

What?

Can you close it here
for a second, please?

How you doing, Michael?

Listen, please forgive me.

I'm a little caught up.

Look, there's a problem
I've got to straighten out

with-- there's a problem
I've got to straighten

out with Judy Garland.

Can you entertain Michael
for a few minutes?

Sure, why not?

Thank you, Steve.

Dennis.

Hello.

Dennis and [inaudible].

Dennis, I want you
to meet Michael.

Hi.

How are you?

I heard you yesterday.

You really play good.

Thank you.

Scotti tells me
you're straight.

I guess I am.

That sounds promising.

Dennis never met anybody
that was straight.

If he did, I think it
would destroy his ego.

Honey.

Yeah?

They were all straight
until they met me.

Isn't that true, Steve?

Oh.

Uh, the dancers are all beat.

Can we take a break?

What?

Can we take a break, Steve?

The dancers are beat.

So, go ahead.

Michael.

Michael, have you
ever seen the dance?

I guess not.

Scotti, why don't
you take him around.

Do you want to see it?

I think he should.

Love to.

I'll hold your [inaudible].

OK.

Far out.

I think you're gonna find
this very interesting.

Fascinating.

SCOTTI: What doesn't
appeal to you?

MICHAEL: Voyeuristically,
it's a terrific thing

to write home about.

[laughter]

SCOTTI: I had my whole family
here a couple of times.

MICHAEL: Are you kidding?

SCOTTI: No, it was outrageous.

It was outrageous.

MICHAEL: Do they
know you're, uh--

SCOTTI: I mean, yeah,
they're very proud that I'm

a manager, as a matter of fact.

MICHAEL: [laughs]

SCOTTI: But, uh.

MICHAEL: It must be
a relief to have,

you know, a place to come
where you don't have to worry

about your cover being blown.

You know what I mean?

SCOTTI: It is, [inaudible]
your only cover is your towel.

MICHAEL: [laughs] Are there
any air ducts you walk over

they go [inaudible]. [laughs]

SCOTTI: Yes.

[laughter]

MICHAEL: Uh, would you mind
pointing them out to me?

The air ducts?

SCOTTI: Yeah, as soon
you get into a towel,

I'll walk you across one.

[laughter]

By the way, if you see a few
people cruise you around here,

you really can't blame them.

That doesn't get you
uptight, does it?

What are you doing
for lunch today?

MICHAEL: Oh, I told
Tracy to meet me.

We thought we'd try that
place around the corner.

SCOTTI: Terrific.

That's one of my
favorite places.

Why don't you be
my guests today?

[piano music playing]

[woman singing]

That was perfect!

Really?

Think you can do
that at the show?

If you can sing it like
that, I can play it.

Ah, you're gonna be
so easy to work with.

Thank you.

That was beautiful.

Come on, let's go to lunch.

Gee, I'd like to, but I can't.

Come on, Michael, let's go.

Sure, why not?

Great.

[dance music playing]

So why don't you guys come
out to the game tonight?

What game?

The football game.

Continental Bath is playing
the New York City Athletic Club.

Get out!

No, we really are.

Do you mean that
the Continental

Bath has a football team?

Yes.

And you're probably captain.

Who's [inaudible]?

Oh, I don't know if
you've ever heard of him,

Judy Garland, Dianna Ross.

I've heard.

Shirley [inaudible].

[inaudible]

And Michael's
playing [inaudible].

[indiscernible chatter]

They've got a shaving area.

And in the shaving area
is the water cooler,

you know, with a tank
on top, big bottle.

Filled with red mouthwash.

TRACY: [laughs]

SCOTTI: No, no,
that's not mouthwash.

MICHAEL: What?

SCOTTI: That's [inaudible].

[laughter]

MICHAEL: Disco and
jukebox, and the guys

are there all-- what
24 hours a day, right?

Hey, you guys are
coming, I hope.

You bet.

Aren't we?

I guess so.

TRACY: Hey!

SCOTTI: Do you like football?

MICHAEL: Sure.

I hate it.

It's gonna be a great game.

[indiscernible chatter]

Geez.

[band music playing]

[cheering]

[interposing voices]

MAN: Fuck you, man,
I'm going home.

MAN: Hey, you think you
can handle that, Frank?

[interposing voices]

[kissing sounds]

[cheering]

Hike!

[grunting]

MAN: Come on, come on, baby.

All right, now come on.

[clapping]

MAN: Hike!

[laughter]

(SINGING) I've got music.

I've got my man, who could
ask for anything more?

Two, three, mwah!

[cheering]

44, 36, 25, eight,
three, 45, 50!

Go, Scotti, go!

[cheering]

MAN: Get him off me!

How you doing?

We're winning, of
course. [laughs]

I saw my best friends again.

MAN: Yeah, really?

You guys have been
[inaudible] all the time.

MAN: W'ere gonna
show them this time.

Break on three.

Three, three.

MAN: Come on!

MAN: Very private, fellas.

Oh, look how [inaudible].

[laughter]

MAN: Geez.

[interposing voices]

MAN: Who's got my--
[interposing voices]

MAN: You--

[interposing voices]

MAN: Who got him?

MAN: What's wrong with Grace?

MAN: Come on, he's fakin' it.

Oh!

[laughter]

[interposing voices]

Oh, Michael, it looks
like you're gonna play.

Michael.

Hey, hey, come
on, fellas, geez.

[laughs]

[interposing voices]

Now, we're gonna go
down this way, see?

One, two, three, that's it.

That's it.

All right.

Here we go.
Come on.

Come on, come.

Here we go.

All right.

37, 45--

MAN: Oh shit!

MAN: What's that [inaudible]?

[interposing voices]

[cheering]

It was a great game.

You got lucky.

Well, we won.

[laughs]

Yeah, cheating.

That's not fair.

That is the sweetest
team in the world.

The fastest kissers
on the block.

You bet.

Ah, you know, there's a lot
of love in this park too.

You know, the first
time I ever made love

was right here in this place?

Yeah?

Yeah.

What was she like?

It was very beautiful.

What was she like?

It was a he.

Your first time was with a guy?

Uh-huh.

That's why you're not normal.

Normal.

What'd I say?

You don't know?

No, I just said that maybe--

That the most important
experience in his life

turned him into a sick pervert.

Oh, I never said that.

Geez.

Well, what did
you mean by normal?

Normal is normal.

A homosexual is not normal.

Well, he doesn't
seem so twisted to me.

And he's been nothing but
nice to you from the first day

you met him.

Look, OK.

He's been nice to me.

I like him and all of that,
but, uh-- what's the matter?

Well, a guy.

I could never get
close to a guy.

I mean, a woman
is something else.

I just think that
maybe you ought

to open your eyes to
the fact that you could

relate to somebody
like Scotti, somebody--

somebody who can love.

I mean, like you're putting
a-- a label on everything.

And you're saying
society says it's wrong,

so therefore you
go along with it.

And you won't get close to it.

And you won't even open
yourself up to the fact

that this might
be a very honest--

Look, love and friendship
is one thing, man,

but I can-- I like
Scotti, I told you that.

But that's it.

I mean, I could only
like him up to a point.

After that--
-What point?

The sexual, you know, the--
his sexual preferences would

be in the back of my mind.

It would, uh, you know, cut
a relationship off there.

I don't see anything
wrong with that.

TRACY: Look, you don't have
to feel threatened by him.

Just because he's
gay doesn't mean

you have to go to be with him.

You've really got to
think some things over.

I'm gonna go, all right?

[knocking]

Scotti?

Hey.

Hi.

Are you busy?

Sort of, getting
ready for work.

What's up?

Oh, well, I'd like
to talk to you.

Can I come in?

Well, OK.

But I really don't think
there's very much to talk about.

Well, I think there is.

I'd like to apologize.

You really don't have
to apologize, Michael.

Excuse me while I get dressed.

Uh, look, Scotti, about
what I said in the park.

Skip it.

No, I don't want to skip it.

I want you to know that I didn't
mean it the way it sounded.

What was it that
you meant, Michael?

Well, nothing, really.

It's just conditioning.

Bullshit.

Am I really supposed
to believe that you

don't know what you're saying?

No, I know what I'm saying.

It's just it sometimes I-- what
I say isn't really what I feel.

What the fuck does that mean?

Oh, come on, Scotti.

You know what I'm talking about.

How the hell do I know
what you're talking

about when you don't know
what you're talking about--

Look, man, I came
here to apologize.

If you can't take
that, the hell with it.

OK, OK.

Look, I just wanted to
tell you that I realized

what I said was stupid.

We all say stupid things.

But you've got
to realized, man,

where I'm coming from, see.

Where I come from, what
you do with fags is

punch them in the mouth, see?

Oh, does that make
it right, Michael?

No, but-- on an Air
Force base, that's

just the way it is, you know?

Everybody's super butch.

Is that where you're from?

Yeah, yeah.

And you know, everybody
just talks like that.

So I guess I've
always been like that.

Always?

Well, maybe not always.

I remember what I
was 12 I-- I knew

a guy who was a fighter pilot.

His name was Greg,
and he was a lot more

sensitive than the
rest of them, you know.

He used to-- he kind
of befriended me.

Took me up in a
trainer a lot of times,

even let me have the
stick. [chuckles]

Oh, wow, for a
kid, 12 years old,

always wanted to be a pilot.

I mean, and that was it.

Anyway, to make a long story
short, we would play football

and went fishing.

He even taught me how to shoot.

One time we went trout
fishing and hit a flash storm,

came on us.

We got really drenched.

There was a cabin there, but
nobody put any firewood inside.

So we couldn't get a fire
going and couldn't get dry.

We took off all
our clothes though.

And there were a
couple of blankets

and we wrapped up in the
blankets and tried to get warm.

We had a couple
of cans of sterno

so we could make some soup.

And we did, and it was terrific.

But, uh, I still
couldn't get warm,

so, uh, we, uh-- he
started rubbing my hands

and my arm and my back.

It wasn't a sensual-- then
he put his arms around me.

Uh, and that embarrassed me.

Because I mean, I don't think
my father ever-- ever hugged me.

And I got into it.

I really felt terrific.

And I guess I went
to sleep like that.

The next thing I knew, man,
I was flying across the room

and lights were--
flashlights were in my eyes.

And it was my father and a
couple of non-coms with him,

and they grabbed Greg and
was pushing him around

and yelling obscene things.

You know, I mean
they'd-- he flipped out.

Anyway, lesson of the story
is that I learned, you know,

not to-- I learned not to
put hands on other men, see?

Did you love him?

Yeah, I guess I did.

You know, Michael, if it
weren't for your old man,

you'd be normal.

[chuckles]

--[chuckles] Hey, I
really better be going.

Will you walk me downstairs?

Sure.

[inaudible].

Live around here?

Where've you been?

I, uh, went over to Scotti's.

Oh?

Hey, we still friends?

Don't be silly.

You wanna go in?

Yeah.

I'm going to throw up.

--[laughs] Come on, my
dress can't be that bad.

No, it's beautiful.

Aw, thank you.

Can you put this on.

Oh, sure.

Michael!

--[laughs] Well,
you look so sexy.

Hey, I got a great idea.

Why don't we forget
about going tonight

and just stay home
and make love?

OK.

OK?

You talked me into it.

I did?

You did.

You're gonna hate me for this.

But I think I'd really prefer
if you stayed home tonight.

Oh, come on, Michael.

Can you help me put this on.

No, I'm serious.

I think I'd be more comfortable
if you weren't there.

You know what I mean?

No, I don't.

Would you mind terribly?

Yes, I would mind.

Really, why?

Michael, I've been looking
forward to it all week.

I bought a new dress.

I put on my makeup.

Tracy, this is-- I've never
done a gig like this before.

My stomach's doing flips.

I'd be more comfortable if you
weren't there to hear my goofs.

You can understand that, right?

Michael you're gonna be great.

You're just getting
stage fright.

Hey, come on.

You're getting yourself
all worked up over nothing.

Nothing?

Don't tell me what's in my head.

You don't know
what's in my head.

Hey, come on.
I'm all dressed up.

I'm ready to go.

I'm not staying home.

Don't stay home.

Who asked you to stay home?

So now you don't give a damn?

Oh, Tracy, come on.

Don't come on to me.

I honestly can't
believe that you don't

want me to be there tonight.

Tracy, please, not tonight.

Michael, if you need
me, I'll be in my studio.

[dance music playing]

[cheering]

Welcome to the Continental
Bath and House Club.

I'm really glad you
came out tonight

to have a good time with us.

Our middle name is steam,
and we have a really steamy

evening here for you tonight.

We have lots of surprises.

Yeah, that's right, sugar.

And the evening
will go on and on.

Ladies and gentlemen,
can I be heard?

Can everybody
[inaudible] by the pool?

[cheering]

OK.

[piano music playing]

[applause]

The incredible Janie Olivor.

(SINGING) I wanna
be a pretty girl

and have easy kind of love.

Wouldn't have to say much,
wouldn't bend to your touch.

Love would be so free and
easy like a pretty girl.

I want to go home where
there's a peaceful world,

wouldn't have to try hard.

[inaudible]

Hey, man!

Make it easy for me,
like the [inaudible].

Pretty girl.

And have the easy love.

[cheering]

SCOTTI: Ladies and gentlemen, we
have a lineup of stars for you

in tonight's
decadence that would

challenge the galaxy we're in.

Ladies and gentlemen, from
England, Shirley [inaudible].

(SINGING) Morning and
raise a little hell tonight.

I've got the urge to corral
and maybe raise a few brows,

cut lose and pull all the stops.

[clapping]

[caribbean music playing]

[singing in foreign language]

[music playing]

(SINGING) I know-- I know you
must follow the sun wherever it

leads, but remember,
if you should fall

short of your
desires, remember life

holds for you one guarantee.

You'll always have me.

[MUSIC "AIN'T NO MOUNTAIN HIGH
ENOUGH"]

[cheering]

SCOTTI: Ladies and gentlemen,
a very special treat.

The one that got
away, Judy Garland.

[cheering]

(SINGING) You'll feel blue.

You'll feel sad.

You'll miss the bestest
pal you ever had.

There'll come a time,
now don't forget it.

There'll come a time
when you'll regret it.

Oh, baby, think
what you're doing.

My love for you is
gonna drive me to ruin.

After you're gone,
after you've gone, away!

After you've gone and left
me crying, after you've gone,

there's no denying.

SCOTTI: Ladies and
gentlemen, let's

hear it for the entire
cast of [inaudible].

[cheering]

[music playing]

Wow, peace and
quiet, man, nice.

It's a good place to
get away from it all.

Yeah.

Yeah, this isn't lover's lane.

Sort of.

I didn't see Tracy tonight.

I asked her not to come.

You're kidding?

You didn't think she'd
be uptight here, do you?

[laughs] Not Tracy.

Problems?

No.

Huh-uh.

I don't know.

Opening night jitters, I guess.

SCOTTI: Nice, huh?

MICHAEL: Beautiful.

We take ourselves
much too seriously.

That's why it's
all so complicated.

Why don't you tell me
what's really on your mind?

I don't know how.

I think you do.

No, I'm not.

Sure I can't talk
you into staying?

No, thanks.

Uh, Tracy'll be expecting me.

Why don't you give her a call?

Well, the studio's
right on the way home,

so I thought I'd stop by.

You really want to see her.

Yeah, I do.

That's cool.

I can dig that.

Let me throw on a shirt.

I'll walk you
downstairs, Michael.

No, no, Scotti.

That's OK, really.

You sure?

Yeah.

I'm sure.

OK.

I'll see you tomorrow.

OK.

Goodbye.

Bye now.

I'm glad you're here.

Hi.

Is it new stuff?

Old stuff.

How was the show?

It went very well.

You gonna play there next week?

Mhm.

Was a late night.

Yeah, well, Scotti and I
got together afterwards.

Oh?

Where'd you go?

His place.

Anything happen?

Yes.

How-- how does that affect us?

I don't know.

I hope it doesn't.

Let's go home.

[music playing]