Sand Sharks (2012) - full transcript

(soft music)

(engines roaring) (dramatic music)

(groaning)

- Are you kidding me?

Tim!

Come on.

Tim!

(creature roaring)

(soft music)

(dramatic music)

(engine revs)



(growling)

(man yelling)

(gentle music)

- Of course it's gonna work.

Well, the mayor and I happen to go way back.

Hey, when have I ever not come through for you, baby?

Besides...

And then too.

Look, this time it's different, Willie.

You and Erin just get the word out.

When it comes to Jimmy Green, my word is money, baby.

Trust me. (laughing)

- It's workin' fine, Mr. Mayor.

Jimmy.



John.

Oh, I mean, sheriff.

Wow.

Look at you.

Living the dream. (laughing)

- At least one of us is.

- How's your sister, Brenda?

- She carries a gun now.

I'm sure she'll be happy to see you.

- Ha. (clearing throat

(phone rings)

Mr. Mayor.

- James.

I'm a very busy man.

- I know.

You got the weight of the world on your shoulders,

or at least this town.

But have no fear, your savior is here.

- Ha, whose savior?

- Yours.

The island's.

- Oh, and what makes you think we need saving?

- I see it everywhere I look.

Businesses are closing, houses are for sale,

locals are moving to the mainland in search of work.

Poverty's up and happiness is down.

- Ugh, save me the speech, please.

- It's not a speech, it's a golden opportunity.

- Let's just cut to the chase, huh?

How much this time?

- What, money?

I don't need--

- How much?

- You know what?

Frankly, Pop, I'm insulted.

Your son, the fruit of your loins,

returns home to bring some life to the dying town

that raised him, and this--

- How much?

- Not much.

I got millions waiting on the nickel here,

which means millions for this island.

You'd be a hero.

And it is an election year, right, Pop?

Huh?

I've got a plan that will take White Sands

from the red back into the black,

just like it was before the attack.

- All right, son.

I'll bite.

- How many times have I told these guys

not to ride on the beach?

- A lot.

- And we haven't found the other body or bike?

And the other riders, they didn't hear or see anything?

- Nope.

- Because, jeez, I mean,

It looks like he was dragged in the sand

until his head finally just snapped off.

He had to have been screaming.

- But those engines are very loud.

- I know, why do you think I tell them

not to ride on the beach?

- Hey, look, don't bite my head off, okay?

I am just as upset as you are.

- No, I mean, we got to explore every angle

if we're gonna solve this murder.

- Murder?

That what you think this is?

- What else could it be?

- Well, I'll tell you what it looks like,

but you don't wanna hear it.

You don't wanna face the facts.

- Facts?

The fact is, this head and a those marks

are too far from the beach to be a shark attack.

- No, the tide could have washed it up.

Look, the line ends all the way up top there.

- No, no way.

Tim still had his helmet on.

Why would he be swimming with his helmet on?

- I don't know, maybe they were in the water.

They can do that nowadays with these dirt bikes.

They can ride them on the water.

- Did you ask the guys?

Is that what they told you?

- I asked them, but they said

that's not what they were doing.

- So how did he end up in the water

with his helmet on, okay?

Plus, look at the blood marks.

They line up with the head.

So the tide didn't do this.

He was dragged.

- Those lacerations look very similar to a bite.

Maybe we should call Dr. Powers.

- I'm not calling Dr. Powers because it wasn't a shark.

I mean, for all we know it could have been a coyote.

- A coyote?

There hasn't been a coyote on this island in 30 years.

- Look, I'm just saying if it was another animal,

what could have done it to this man?

Besides a shark.

Go look for the other dead bodies.

If you have to, comb the beaches.

- Shouldn't we comb the water?

- No.

Stay out of the water.

But the beach, they stay open.

- What? - Mayor's orders.

And speaking of sharks, Jimmy's back.

- You remember the old island festival, Pop?

- Please, son.

Is that what this is all about?

You wanna throw another party?

The community still hasn't recovered from the last one.

- I'm not just talking about a party

with a parade and some pony rides here, Pop.

Check it out.

I'm talking about an annual festival based

on radical self-expression and self-reliance.

A temporary community for spring-breakers

giving them exactly what they need: freedom

from their classes and midterms.

- And frat parties.

Oh, yeah, college is so oppressive these days.

Not that you would ever know.

Looks like one of those old kumbaya festivals.

(laughing) Yeah, I remember those days.

Bunch of hippies running around naked.

(inhaling) High on dope.

- Oh, no, no, no, no.

Listen, Pop, I'm not just talking

about a bunch of spring breakers running around taking

their tops off and drinking themselves into oblivion.

There's gonna be music too.

Huh?

Huh, think about it.

Think about it.

Daytona, Havasu, Burning Man.

All of these places survive on one week a year.

We can have our own cash cow right here.

The Sandman Festival.

Thousands of kids from all across America

will flock to this island

for some fun in the sun, and spend tons and tons

of their parents' money.

It will save the town.

You will be the mayor that saves this town.

You and me will be the family that saves this town.

- Did you practice that speech?

- A little, why, did it sound rehearsed?

- Not really.

- Ha!

- Sandman Festival, huh?

So there's a lot of gilt in this?

- Oh, big money.

Big money, from ticket sales

to camp site rentals, food, lodging.

If it can't be got, it can be bought.

We'll make a killing.

- Does this mean you're in? - Let's party, son.

I don't do that.

(speaks in foreign language)

That's my boy.

(dramatic music)

(cell phone buzzing)

- Pacific Marine Institute.

Hi, my name is Brenda Stone.

- I'm a deputy at the White Sands Island Sheriff Department.

Yeah, I'm hoping to speak to a Dr. Powers.

- This is she.

- I'm sorry, wrong person.

I'm looking for a Dr. Jacques Powers.

- He's not with us anymore.

- Did he finally retire?

He helped us with a shark attack a few years ago,

and I kind of got the feeling

he'd rather swim with the sharks than study them.

- Is there anything I can help you with?

You guys haven't had another shark attack, have you?

- Well, we're not sure.

We're hoping someone could come take a look.

- What's the name again?

(dramatic music)

- Okay.

You have successfully buried me in the sand.

Now how about you successfully un-bury me

from the sand?

- I'm sorry, I'm busy.

- No, you're not busy.

You're putting on suntan lotion.

- Oh, would you like some?

There you go.

- No!

(spitting) I don't want any.

I want you to un-bury me from the sand like I asked.

- Oh, relax.

- Relax?

Relax, you try to relax when you're buried neck-deep

in the sand.

Well, maybe next time you'll remember our anniversary.

- Oh, my...

I'm speechless.

I don't even know what to say,

because this is the most ridiculous thing

that has ever happened to me.

And as soon as you un-bury me,

I'm breaking...

That's great.

Whatever.

I wanna break up.

(creature roaring) (screaming)

Cindy?

Cindy?

Ow.

Is that?

Ow.

Ow, ow.

Ow!

(screaming)

(soft music)

- [Announcer] Attention all passengers, now boarding

from Cedar Bay.

Please present your boarding pass to the ticker counter.

Thank you. - White Sands,

is that one word or two?

Eh, whatever.

Okay.

Just sent out the bait on Biter.

In a few minutes every college kid

in this country is gonna have a bite on Sandman.

- Got to love social networking.

- Yes Mr. Baggio, I will make sure that Mr. Green's

party lives up to your expectations.

Okay, goodbye.

- Excuse me.

You must be Jimmy's lawyer.

He told us to wait; we'd meet one sharp lady.

Actually, he said sharp-tongued devil lady.

(laughing) I'm sure he was just kidding.

So, I'm Willie.

I do all the cyber marketing for Jimmy.

And this is Erin, our intern.

- Hey, hey.

(golf cart humming) (playful music)

- Welcome to my island.

(sighing)

How was the flight?

- Fly.

Thanks for the chariot.

- My first heli-thingy ride.

It was hella cool.

- I'd like to take credit for it, but--

- He can't.

His investor paid for it.

- Nice to see you too, Amanda.

Tony D-Bag send you here to check up on me?

- Mr. Baggio just wanted to make sure you didn't

bite off more than you can chew again.

- Well, let's go see the beach and you can judge

for yourself, shall we?

Hey, where's Sparky and the boys?

- They took a boat thingy.

- Yeah, there wasn't enough room

for all this fireworks.

Said this vessel will give me the bomb.

- Yeah, I know all about his military-grade explosives.

He wanted to call this festival Sand-pocalypse Now.

- Um, Mr. Green?

- Just jump in the bed, it's safe.

- Oh, yeah.

I've heard that one before.

- [Announcer] Attention all passengers, Flight 14,

your bags are now available--

(engine revs)

- Hey!

(ominous music)

(banging)

- Jeez!

(panting)

You nearly scared me to death.

- I thought you would have caught me,

being that you're on shark watch.

- Oh.

Guess I just got lost in the water.

- Any activity? - No.

It's dead.

- Well, I guess that's a bit of a relief, isn't it?

John?

(screaming)

John, what?

(laughing)

- Stop.

- So, we'll set up the main stage right here.

We're gonna have some beer and food tents off to the side.

Nice little VIP lounge area in the back.

- Wait, we having actual stages?

- Not really.

No, I wanna all be on the ground.

You know, have the DJ spinning at eye level.

Make it feel like one giant beach blanket bingo party.

- Who were you thinking for DJs?

- The usual.

Killer Carl, Dead Horse.

Start things off with DJ Plan B.

And if any of them say they can't make it,

you tell them they owe me.

- Okay.

- That's ironic: you collecting on a debt.

- What's ironic, Amanda, is you not being a witch.

Actually, that would be a miracle. (laughing)

- Stop trying to flirt with me, James.

I'm out of your league.

- You only think you're out of my league.

And you tell Tony that Jimmy Green always pays.

My word is money, baby.

Money. - Money.

- It better be, otherwise your name

is gonna be on a tombstone.

(clearing throat)

- So, what about, like, housing?

- Yeah, housing.

There is a campground just down the beach a ways

for everybody to put their RVs,

their tents, whatever.

- You expect thousands of college kids to sleep in tents?

- I know for you, Amanda, sleeping in a three-star hotel

is roughing it.

- Try four-star. - But to a college student,

sleeping on a couch is a luxury.

Besides, it's spring break.

It's Sandman Festival.

If they're sleeping they ain't spending.

- Yup!

- Who needs beds when you have booze,

beach bodies and bands?

(laughing)

- And she is why I will never have kids.

- Spring break is off the hook! (laughing)

- No, I don't do that.

- Oh.

(playful music)

(camera shutter clicking)

- Oh-ho!

Nice hat.

Is that part of the uniform?

- Jimmy.

- Brenda.

Long time no see.

- Yeah.

Last time I saw you,

oh, that's right, I never saw you.

You just left me with an eviction notice,

two grand in bills and your stupid cat.

- At least I left you with something.

- You have some nerve coming back here, Jimmy Greenburg.

- Greenburg?

- It's Green now.

- I heard, as in envy?

- As in money.

- Right.

Isn't that ironic, considering you never have any.

- That's exactly what I said.

- I'm sorry, who are you?

- This is Amanda Gore.

She happens to be my lawyer.

- Actually, I represent James' financiers,

among other things.

- So, why has the prodigal son returned?

- Oh, I just had an idea how to help the island.

- Oh, doing what, exactly?

- Just something to help out local businesses.

- Oh, we're throwing a major rager for spring break.

It's called the Sandman Festival.

It's gonna be epic.

- Festival?

Jimmy, you're organizing another festival?

- It's not really a festival,

more like a party.

Kind of a small get-together, really.

- After what the people of this island have gone through,

you're throwing another party?

- Look, I am gonna put White Sands back on the map.

- You're the reason we're off the map, Jimmy.

15 people died the last time you threw

this island a party.

(roaring) (screaming)

- Help!

Somebody help!

Something happened to my boyfriend!

It came out of the sand.

(dramatic music)

Come on!

I saw it!

Something ate my boyfriend!

There is something, a shark swimming

in the sand.

- Miss, sharks can't swim in the sand!

- I saw it!

- She must be talking about shallow water

or somethin', right?

- John, come on.

Wake up!

- Ooh.

- That's gonna be bad for business.

(voices chattering)

- That's all, we wanna know-- - The same answers.

The same thing every year.

Blah, blah, blah! - We understand that.

We understand! - Everybody, please calm down.

- Hello!

- [Mayor] One at a time,

one at a time. (whistling)

- There's a killer in the water

and you're telling us to calm down?

- Tim Cassidy was killed the day before,

and you didn't warn anyone?

- Now, hold on, Peter.

We don't know that Tim Cassidy was attacked.

Why, what I mean to say is we still haven't

found the body.

Right, John?

- Yes, Mr. Mayor, but-- - Excuse me, John.

You of all people should be freaked.

You lost your wife and child to a shark attack.

- Hey, now, we're not saying it was a shark attack.

- What else could it have been?

- Look, we have an expert coming

from the mainland, Dr. Powers.

He helped us last time.

He'll know what to do.

- What about the bounty?

Is that true?

- Yes, I guess you talked--

- Yes, as a matter of fact, it is.

You bring us the head, you'll get the bread guaranteed.

- Listen, listen guys, we can't have you running

around town with guns chasing after some fish.

I'm sorry, sir, we don't even know where it came from.

- I heard it came from the sand.

- No, Bob.

I'm sure it was just a shark swimming

in shallow water.

But until the experts take a look at it,

the beaches, they stay closed.

- What? - You're closing the beaches?

For how long?

- Just until.

Listen, listen! - Everyone calm down.

- Just until we find out what it is and we can stop it.

- How long, exactly?

I own a business, and it's hurting.

Another bad season, I'm gonna have to move.

- Closing the beaches will kill us all.

- What the sheriff means to say

is that the beaches will be closed for 24 hours only.

- Hey, wait a minute.

I got a deadline here!

- 24 hours only, that's it!

- [Man] I'll catch your sand sharks.

- Excuse me?

- I said, I'll catch it for youse.

And it's a sand shark.

- I've never seen a sand shark that big.

- (laughing) That's because you got your eyes up your ass.

It's big 'cause it ain't a sand shark.

It's a sand shark.

It swims in the sand.

- They don't exist.

- Ha!

Says you.

I've seen 'em.

Now, you want it caught or not?

- Well, of course we do, Angus.

- Okay, I'll catch it meself.

But I ain't doing it for no thousand bucks.

I'll do it for 10 grand.

For that, I'll bring you the head, good and dead.

Yeah?

And then you get to have your fruity festival.

And your businesses will survive.

Tourists will come.

No one gets hurt.

- Well, thank you, Angus.

We'll certainly consider it.

- You know where to find me.

- Okay.

- All right, this meeting's adjourned.

Everybody out of here. - What?

No, wait minute.

- Thank you all.

- [John] Let's go, guys, come on.

Let's get out of here.

- Sheriff Stone?

(soft music)

- [John] So, how are we looking?

The bite marks on the neck match the ones on the legs.

It's the same animal.

- Is it a shark?

- I can't be sure.

I'd have to run some more tests,

see if there's any other DNA.

- I noticed you had a firearm, Dr. Powers.

- Well, you know, there's a lot of sharks

out there, sheriff.

A girl can't be too careful.

And it's Sandy, please.

- Well, Sandy, call me John.

(dramatic music)

- Hey, Earl, you sure that thing comes out at night?

- Damn sure, man.

All the attacks been at night.

But we will have to be patient.

Hey, you see that?

No!

(roaring)

(dramatic music)

It's the shark, oh.

- Oh, crap! (both screaming)

We're on land.

It can't get us now.

- Earl! - What?

- It's coming again! - Oh, God!

(screaming)

- (sighs) Well, that's Earl Jones' raft.

Hm.

Can you guys lift for me?

(flies buzzing) - Ew.

- Oh.

- Yeah. - Ugh.

All right, guys.

You can bring it down thanks.

- Seems like they would have been better off in the boat.

You know, judging by the position of the raft,

this far up the beach, they weren't attacked in the water.

- Oh.

- Hey!

Got a party to plan here!

- Oh, I got to go deal with that.

Are you okay down here?

- Yeah.

I'm gonna play in the sand and see what I can dig up.

- Okay.

Thanks, guys.

- Ooh.

I love a woman in uniform.

- Ugh, Jimmy, I'm not in the mood.

- You're not in the mood, what about me?

I have an entire festival to set up,

and your brother won't let us on the beach.

- That's because it's closed for 24 hours.

You were there.

- Well, it may be closed to the public, but not me.

I have reserved this beach for a private event.

- Regardless, you're not getting on this beach.

until John says it's safe.

- Ah.

Still can't jump until your brother says

how high, huh?

Well, according to this contract

signed by my father,

the distinguished mayor

of White Sands, I have full access to use this beach

whenever and however I choose.

- Raoul Jones and Ray Parker's arms

were just found in the sand minus their bodies.

So, I don't care if God himself signed

that paper, everyone is waiting 24 hours,

or at least until we catch whatever fish

is eating people on this beach.

Until then, your party isn't on the sand.

It's on the ice.

- Hello, doctor.

Of what, I have no idea.

- So, what's the plan?

- Well, we just go ahead as planned.

Just keep the marketing machine running.

I have a very special hands-on job for you.

- I told you I wasn't gonna do that again.

- Relax, I said hands-on job,

not hand, never mind.

- All right, but what about the beach being closed?

With a shark out there, no way are people

gonna come to the beach.

- You just leave the shark to big daddy.

Hey, it's Jimmy.

Your brother still doing those lame shark movies?

- I got the stuff you asked for.

- Thanks.

- So is there anything new?

- Actually, yes.

Take a look at this bad boy.

- [John] Wow.

Looks like a shark tooth.

It is, but I'm not sure what kind.

- This thing really puzzles me.

Take a look at this.

See the gum line?

It's really soft.

And the tooth is underdeveloped.

It looks like a baby tooth,

but it's bigger than any adult great white shark

tooth I've ever seen.

- Well, is it a great white?

It looks more like a sand tiger shark, but...

- Well, then it's a tiger shark.

- It's similar in shape and density,

but see the striations right here?

- [John] Yeah.

See how the tip has a jagged edge, like a saw?

- Mm-hmm.

- Well, I've only seen one other tooth like that.

And it was a tooth that my dad brought back

from Joshua Tree, of a prehistoric sand tiger shark.

The Striatolamia macrota.

- So are you saying this is a dino shark?

- Um, I can't be sure.

I'd have to run other tests.

You know, carbon dating, DNA, stuff like that.

So don't go getting all Roger Corman on me yet.

- Who?

- Obviously you're not a B-movie fan.

- Nope.

- [Brenda] Brenda for John?

- Yeah, Brenda.

- I need you to come down here real quick.

They caught another one.

- Caught one what? - Another shark, and it's big.

(dramatic music)

- Okay, who killed the shark?

Huh?

Was it Banlinder?

Did Mike Banlinder kill this shark?

- I think this is the shark killer over here, Pop.

- Oh, you sir, (speaks in foreign language).

So we all have you to thank for this?

- That's right.

Me and my crew snapped this little guppy up

like a bird in a disco.

- (laughing) Aces.

Just aces.

Fantastic work!

- I hate to bust up your party, boys,

but would you mind if we take a look at this fish?

- What's there to look at?

It's a shark, it's dead; let's open up the beach

and party, huh?

- I just wanna make sure it's the shark

we're looking for, Jimmy.

- This guy obviously has nothing to hide.

I mean, look at him.

- Sheriff, I am certain this has got to be the right shark.

- Oh, well, if he's sure then we should

definitely have a look.

- Hey, hey, hey!

Get away from there.

- Mr. Mayor, I would like you to meet Dr. Sandy Powers.

She's from the Pacific Marine Institute on the mainland.

She'll be able to tell us if this is our shark.

- Relax, it's loaded.

- Excuse me?

- The shark.

It's loaded.

It's real.

There was an actor in Shark Attack 3D.

Died while filming.

Ate one of the other actors,

so they had to pop it.

(both laughing)

- Bites for them, good for us, huh?

- [Mike] Giddyup.

- It's not what we're looking for.

- Oh, come on.

What is this, a joke?

Hey, Pop, John is obviously trying to stop the festival.

But he caught a shark.

- Yeah, but it's not the shark.

- Miss, are you positive?

- Dead positive.

The teeth are too small on this one.

This is an adult, and I believe that the tooth

that we have is from a baby.

Besides, the shark's been dead a week.

I doubt these men even caught it.

- Beaches stay closed.

Get this fish out of here.

- Does this mean I don't get my bounty?

You just get your crew together and start setting up

for the festival.

I'll handle it.

(dramatic music)

- Hey, got plans for spring break?

Come to the Sandman Festival.

Hey, come to the Sandman Festival.

It's gonna be great.

(cell phone ringing)

Hey, Mr. Green.

- Erin, baby.

Talk to me.

How's it going out there?

- Lame-o.

Nobody's taking these fliers.

- Do they know that it's a music festival?

- Yes, but-- - And have you told them

there's gonna be tonnes of beer?

Yes, but-

- Where are you?

- The beach by the boardwalk.

- The beach?

Oh, hell no, Erin.

Baby, sweetheart, no, no, no.

People at the beach, they don't wanna party.

They don't wanna be bothered.

You need to find a bar and buy some bad decisions.

- But I'm only an intern.

I don't have any money.

- Ooh.

Uh, just...

Put it on your card.

I'll pay you back.

- Hm.

Yeah, you will.

Bloodies for everybody!

(all cheering)

(upbeat music)

- I don't know what that girl would do without me.

She'd get eaten alive in the real world.

How's promoting in cyberspace, huh?

- Oh, man, we got Tweets and creeps,

bites and bulletins all over the Web, man.

I'm telling you, we are on campus,

on your wall and on your phone.

I got space on lockdown, son.

- Right on, dawg.

- Well, actually, Erin created this program that triples

the hits on every blog and college website in the country.

So, she's your chick.

- Really?

She can do that, huh?

- Yeah, she's smarter than she looks.

- Wow.

I would have never guessed she was such a shark.

Better watch out.

She might come biting for your job.

- What?

Never happen.

I'm still the big fish in this pond.

Check it.

I'm even too big for this island's internet.

I already crashed it twice.

- Hey, hey, hey.

- See what I mean?

I'm just saying, I'm that good.

- Don't ever do that again.

- Okay, all right, all right.

I won't.

(gentle music)

(growling)

(electricity crackling)

No.

This isn't happening now.

(breathing heavily)

Tell me this did not just happen.

We did not just lose every feed!

No!

Hey.

You looking for Jimmy?

- Yeah.

You? - Yeah.

- Jimmy, I am wet and...

Hi, deputy.

- Hmm, ma'am.

- Looks like someone's Mr. Popular.

Just so you two know, I get him first.

- What's up?

Hello.

(sighing)

Hello.

Uh, is anybody else's power out?

(siren blaring)

Look, I understand why the back seat.

You don't wanna sit next to me, fine.

But are the handcuffs really necessary?

- Yup. (Jimmy sighs)

- So wanna tell me what's going on?

Where we're headed?

- Nope.

- You know, I said I was sorry.

I never meant to hurt you.

- Well, you didn't.

Happy?

- Not really.

No.

I was hoping an apology might get these off my wrists.

Ow!

- It's always about you, still.

(sighing)

So, why did you really come back here?

- Like I said, I wanna put on a festival

and help White Sands.

- That's it?

You came back here to help the home

that you couldn't wait to get away from?

- Yeah, that's about it.

That, and I'm gonna make some nice green out of it.

(laughing) But other than that,

what else is there here for me?

- Apparently nothing.

- What's going on over there?

- I recognize you.

I recognize who you are.

- You need to relax, dude-- - No, no, no.

You were there earlier.

You were there earlier with a guy named Jimmy.

You just, you just stay put.

- Those are your buddies, right?

- Sheriff. - What?

- Is that really necessary? - Yes, it is.

- Do you even know how to use that thing?

- Yes, I do.

- Thank God your mother's not here to see this.

Why is he in cuffs? (grunting)

- He is a ringleader of this crew of criminals.

- Criminals?

Buddy, if you'd just let me fix the problem--

- That's enough out of you.

- Yeah, if you would let him get the power on,

John, maybe it would shed a little light

on whatever your problem is.

- Oh, so you do know all these men?

- As a matter of fact, I do.

They work for me.

- Wait, these men all work for you?

- Yes.

- Impressive.

- Impressive?

No, not impressive, Mr. Mayor.

These are the same men that thought it'd

be funny to slip in a fake shark,

and then turn the power off of this entire island.

- Look, it's just a fuse problem.

- That's enough out of you, light bulb.

(dramatic music)

- Would you take off the cuffs, please?

Is all this true?

- As a matter of fact, Dad, it is, and, ow!

Ow!

We have an entire festival to get set up, ah,

by tomorrow, and we're already running behind.

(ominous music)

If he would just let Sparky get the power on then--

- Sparky can just stay cool, okay?

You keep breaking the law and doing

your little sneaky stuff, and the power will

not be the only thing that goes down.

- You see, Pop?

He's threatening me again.

He's been trying to stop Sandman from the very beginning.

(breathing heavily)

(creature growling)

- All right, enough of this waiting

for divine intervention garbage.

- Look, I told you to stay put.

- Look, buddy, you can't insult me

and then not let me fix the problem.

- Look, you just freeze right there.

- You wanna shoot me?

Then do it.

Otherwise, prepare for fireworks.

- I'm warning you.

I'm warning you, freeze.

You guys stay here.

- [Sparky] Lights up, baby!

(growling)

- Sandy!

Sandy!

- Dr. Powers!

- John, stay there.

It's in the sand.

It's circling.

- Did you see that?

- John, don't!

(gun fires)

- Come on, come on.

- Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

- What the hell was that?

- Did you see that thing?

It moved through the sand like it was water.

- I've never seen a fish swim in sand. (pants)

I hate to say it, but I think the old man was right.

That's an actual sand shark.

- We are keeping these beaches closed

until that thing is killed.

- Agreed.

Sorry, son.

- Pop, you promised me.

- And I also promised that the residents

and visitors of White Sand I'd protect 'em.

(speaks in foreign language), as much as I do truly believe

that your party would help everybody

on this island, what kind of leader would

I be if I allowed this event to go on knowing

that there's some kind of monster out there.

- No.

It is our civic duty to close this beach.

I'm drawing a line in the sand.

You mark my words: I will not rest

until this beast is--

(growling)

- Mr. Mayor! - Hey, Pop!

Oh!

- Oh, my God, Jimmy.

- My dad!

- I know. - It went, it ate him!

And he's gone!

Oh! - My God.

Oh, my God.

(stammering)

- I just got to plug it in!

- Sparky! - Get off the beach!

- Sparky!

- Sparky, get off the beach!

- Come on!

I can help! (gun fires)

- No, you can't! - I can save him!

Shoot that thing!

Sparky!

- Sparky, off the beach!

- Sparky! - It's all right.

Jeez.

Relax.

- Sparky!

- Sparky, get off the beach!

- Here goes nothing. - Sparky!

- Sparky, get off the beach! - Can't have fire

without a Sparky.

(electricity crackling)

- Oh!

(car horns honking)

(gentle music)

(grunting)

- Are you checking up on me?

- Kind of.

I came to tell you the beach is open, but...

Looks like you already know that.

- Yeah, well, you know, now that the sand shark's dead,

I figure the show must go on.

- Same old Jimmy.

Always turning the page.

- Look, I know it sucks.

But it's what my dad would have wanted.

"James, put on a brave face.

"It's business as usual."

That was a little bit more of a bad Sean Connery

than my dad, but you get the point.

Besides, he always loved a good party.

I've decided I'm gonna do this in his honor.

- He would have liked that.

- Yeah.

Yeah.

(grunting)

- Hey, Jimmy, break a leg tonight.

I hope this works out for you and for the island.

- Yeah.

Oh, speaking of that, I got a guy coming

from the mainland to fix the electricity.

So let John know the power will be on soon, okay?

I will, thanks for doing that.

- Yeah, you bet.

(grunting)

(sighing) Brenda.

You know how to get down to the beach from here?

- Yeah, it's that way.

- Great.

Got it.

(grunts) Okay.

(grunting)

Hey. - Hey.

- [Jimmy] Oh, ow, ow!

- Do you need help

Are you okay? - No, no.

I got it, I got it.

- You look like you got it. - Ooh.

(exhaling)

(ominous music)

- The main power is still out.

What are you working on?

- (sighing) Okay, so, remember how I said

I wasn't sure but I thought that the tooth

might be a baby tooth?

- Yeah.

But you also said it was too big to be a baby tooth.

- Oh, it's definitely a baby tooth.

The scary part about it is just how much

of a baby this thing really is.

Our ferocious, flesh-eating fish

was just a newborn pup.

- What?

I mean, this thing's huge.

How's that possible?

- The proof is in the biology.

It's not prehistoric,

though sharks are like alligators and they've

been around for 450 million years.

This thing isn't a fossil.

It's a predator that has evolved to wear sand

like a coat and travel through it like water.

- How does it swim?

- It's all in the skin.

Its placoid scales have evolved to give them

hydrodynamic advantages in the sand,

thus reducing turbulence and friction.

Basically, it uses the tiny vortices

in its scales to suction-cup from one grain

to the next.

And it sucks out the water.

Which is why it seemingly likes to attack at night.

Because that's when the sand is colder and more moist.

- Well, lucky for us, this thing is dead.

- Um, yeah.

About that.

This baby is dead.

But keep in mind that it was a newborn.

Just spawned.

So that means that mommy is probably out there

looking for her lost pup.

- And then I looked up, and there he was, gone!

My dad was gone!

Don't you ever knock?

- Jimmy, we got a problem.

- Another one?

Oh, God.

Cancel my order.

(soft music)

- Did I do good or what? - Hells yeah!

- Dude!

- You hooked it up big time.

- And there's more coming too.

There was a thousand college kids on the dock

when we left.

- You're so paranoid, bro.

You got to have faith in the kid.

(both laughing)

- Yeah, man!

- I mean, what can I say?

It just comes to me in my sleep.

I don't know, these like--

- Ow!

Watch it, loser. - Damn, baby,

I'd pop you like a pill.

- Yeah. - As if.

Just go eat a pine cone, you crunchies.

- All right, attitude.

Whatever.

Peace. - Whatever, we're out of here.

If those are the type of guys that are here,

spring break's gonna bite.

- Whatever.

Come on. - Like I said,

you did a real good job.

Jimmy's gonna be hella impressed.

- You think he'll promote me now?

- No.

You're still the intern.

- Oh.

- Hey, you're the electrician.

Okay, cool.

We got the stage setup and everything.

Make sure you build it right.

(ominous music)

- She's out there, and if she's anything like

her offspring, she's big and she's hungry.

- I hate to sound like a broken record, Jimmy,

but these beaches stay closed.

- No way.

It's too late.

Right now there are thousands of college kids

storming the beaches of White Sands

ready to spend lots and lots of money,

which means lots and lots of money

for the people of this island.

So if you kill this festival now,

then this island could be dead with it.

- That's a risk I'm willing to take.

- Oh, you might be, but the residents

of this island aren't.

So unless you're sure that there is another

shark out there?

We think there is, but we're not positive.

- Ha!

So if you shut down this festival now,

you're just gonna seem paranoid.

And if my dad was here, he would say,

"Paranoia is not a good thing for an election year."

That was a little more Richard Nixon

than my dad, but you get the point.

I do believe you're up for reelection,

aren't you, sheriff?

- Fine.

But the first sign of a shark by your people

or mine, and this party is over.

I wasn't prepared last time,

but this time, we'll be ready.

- Ho-ho!

Looks like a sign from above.

(dramatic music)

What up, party people?

(all cheering)

- [Man] Yeah!

- Welcome to the Sandman Festival.

Woo, woo!

- [Man] Yeah, Sandman!

- I'm your host, Jimmy Green. - Yeah Jimmy!

- And this is going to be the biggest,

the baddest, the hottest beach party on the planet!

(all cheering)

Forget Daytona, forget Cancun.

There ain't no party like a Sandman party

'cause the Sandman party don't stop!

- [Man] Yeah, never stops!

Oh, yeah!

- Woo, yeah!

Yeah!

Before we get started, though,

I wanna dedicate this inaugural party

to the memory of my dad, the late,

great Mayor James Greenburg.

Yes, yes.

Without his support, the Sandman Festival

would still be a dream.

So good looking out, Pop!

(all cheering)

Now, without further ado,

I want you to put your worries about class

to bed and let's wake up this beach with DJ Plan B!

Can you dig it?

(upbeat dance music)

(ominous music)

- Brenda, why are you leaving your post?

- You want me to walk through the crowd

and check things out at eye level?

- No, no.

I got it.

- You sure?

- Yeah, I'll take care of it.

(upbeat dance music)

- Ah, (chuckles).

Ha!

And you and tea bags were worried I wasn't

gonna pull it off.

(laughing) Oh, God.

Oh, my God.

Oh.

Oh, good.

Oh, Lord.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, good.

- Jimmy?

(stammering)

- It's not what it looks like.

- I hope you die.

- You don't, you do?

Hey, wait, I got--

- Don't tell me you're thinking

about Deputy Doughnuts over me.

- Bite me, Amanda.

- I already did that.

- You really are a man-eater, aren't you?

- You know why you'll always be in someone's debt, Jimmy?

You just don't have the head for business.

(screaming)

Holy (stammering).

Shark!

Just one shark.

Just one shark.

Show must go on.

Show must go on.

Oh!

- Yo! - Ah! (laughing)

- [Willie] You're missing the show.

- Hey, Mr. Green, you all right?

You look like you just saw a ghost.

- No, no, no, no.

I'm good, it's all good.

Let's par-tay!

Yeah. - Wait, wait.

I want a picture.

Will you get with Mr. Green?

- All right, okay, cool. - What, now?

Hurry up, take the pic and we'll party.

- Let's go, White Sands!

(screaming)

- Oh, my God!

Oh, my God!

Is that Amanda?

Jimmy, what did you do?

What did you do?

- Me?

I didn't do anything.

It was the sand shark.

A sand shark did it.

- Sand sharks?

I thought they were dead.

- Oh, man, I think I'm gonna be sick.

- Look, everybody just calm down.

Pull yourselves together.

- Calm down?

Jimmy, we got to call the cops.

We got to stop Sandman.

What?

- No, no, we can't.

I can't! - What do you mean you can't?

Of course you can.

- I can't, Willie.

You know what will happen to me if we close this down.

Besides, we got the greatest beach party

in history going on.

We can't blow that because some crazy

mafia witch lost her head.

- Jimmy, it's just not about Amanda, okay?

It's Sparky, it's your father,

It's all the people that died so far.

- I know, I was there, Willie.

And for your information, my father,

Sparky and Amanda would all say the show must go on.

So the show will go on.

- Are you serious right now?

- As a heart attack.

Or shark attack.

- Willie, I think what Jimbo is trying to say

is that we can't just cancel the party

because a few people got killed, okay?

That's bad business.

- Yeah, I got that, okay, Erin?

All right, now you're just an intern,

so why don't you shut up or go back to Target, okay?

- An intern who's been doing your job

since the day I started.

- Whatever.

Look, Jimmy, all right?

I put up with your games because your job pays

well and it gets me a lot of perks,

but this ain't no game, man.

This is real.

We got a lot of kids out there,

and if this gets out it's game over for all of us.

- Which is exactly why we can't say anything.

- Nah, man.

The heck with this.

I'm out.

(grunting)

- Whoa!

What are you doing?

- Sharks are bad for business,

but then again so are cowards.

I guess you have to sacrifice if you wanna get ahead

in this biz, right?

Just ask Amanda.

- I was right.

You really are a shark, aren't you?

- Who, little old me?

No, I just know what I want

and what I'm willing to do to get it.

- Oh, you mean like kill someone?

- That's a little headache when he wakes up.

Okay, I'll tell you what.

You go back to the party,

and I will clean all of this up,

and we're gonna pretend like none

of this ever happened.

- Hmm.

I guess this means you're no longer an intern.

- See, that's why I work for you.

With you, Jimbo.

You're quick.

Now go enjoy your party.

- Well, carry on, then.

(growling)

(upbeat dance music) - Woo!

Aww yeah!

(all cheering)

- [Man] Yeah!

Woo!

Aw yeah - Woo!

Yeah!

- [Man] Woo, aww yeah!

- Hey, Sandy?

Sandy, you there?

I think I see one in the sand.

Your two o'clock.

- I'm looking.

- Yeah, yeah. - Oh!

Yeah!

Woo, oh yeah.

- [Man] Oh yeah!

- All I see are bouncing co-eds.

- [Man] This is so fun, yeah!

Party, yeah. (ominous music)

- Yo! - Come on man.

- Out of the way!

Move, get out of the way, guys.

- [Man] Yo, yo, yo, man, no!

- Whoa!

- Sandy, it's just some punk kids building

a sand castle.

Stay off my beach.

- Yeah! - Oh, yeah!

(upbeat music)

Oh yeah!

- Ah!

Huh?

We did it, Pop!

Ha-ha!

You and me!

Yeah, we saved this stupid island.

No one believed in us.

I'm gonna miss you, Pop.

I love you.

Brave in paradise.

- Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa.

- Excuse me.

Which one of you guys is Rex?

- Uh, that's T-Rex to you.

And I'm a meat-eater.

I meet-- - Just stop, or I'll barf.

- Let's go, Hillary. - Wait.

We hear you guys have ex.

- Where'd you hear that from?

- Everybody's been saying you got the best stuff.

Right, Grace? - Right.

- No, drugs are bad.

- Yeah, say no to drugs.

- Spare me, okay?

So can we see some?

- I'll show you mine if you show him yours.

No way.

I am not showing that boy the girls.

- No, not him.

Sir Shark.

Sharky, sharky.

- Fine.

No peeking.

- No.

- [Man] Ow, ow, woo!

(screaming)

(cheering)

They were building a sand...

(screaming)

- [Man] There's a shark, oh my God.

- Brenda, sound the alarm!

Sound the alarm for everyone!

Everybody get out of here!

Get out of here!

Let's go, go, come on!

Let's go, let's go, let's go.

Everybody out of here.

- Off the stage now.

Get off!

Everyone off the beach now.

It's not safe, off, off now!

Get off the beach. - I smell bacon!

(laughing)

(crowd screaming)

- Oh, no, no, no, no, no.

(shark growling)

(screaming)

(growling) (gun firing)

Oh, you stupid sharks.

You're gonna ruin everything.

No, no.

No, just wait.

Just stop.

There's nothing to worry about, people.

- Jimmy! - Everything's gonna be fine.

Just ignore the chaos.

Just keep dancing.

Keep dancing!

Keep, oh, man.

No.

Stop!

Everybody, just keep dancing.

- Jimmy, let's go.

- No, no, no, no.

I'm not leaving.

I'm staying and I'm fighting.

- No, now is not the time.

Let's go!

(shark roaring) - Hey, shark breath.

(laughing) First one's on me, buddy!

(glass shattering) - No, come on!

- Let's get out of here.

(gun fires)

We don't have time for this.

Hurry!

- Let's go!

Clear the beach, everybody.

Let's go, everybody!

Come on, let's go now.

Everybody, let's go, let's go.

- Hurry, Brenda.

Oh.

(shark roaring)

Brenda?

Oh!

Oh, God.

Come on.

Stay with me.

(grunting)

Hang in there.

Come on.

Stay with me.

Don't die on me.

I can...I can get this back in you.

Oh, God!

I'll just put it back in there and you'll be fine.

Oh!

Ugh!

Oh!

God, Brenda.

Hang on.

Stay with me.

That's it.

I know that it's probably isn't the best time

to tell you this, but you know how

when we used to be together I'd always tell you

that I didn't really love you and I just liked you a lot?

Well, I lied.

I actually do.

I really do love you.

I love you.

What?

- You're a jerk.

(sighing)

- Oh.

Ugh. (spits)

(dramatic music)

- Sandy, come on, come on!

- Give me your hand.

Oh, my God, that was close.

- That was a little too close.

What was in that stuff?

- Highly concentrated chum juice.

- Chum juice?

- (laughing) Yeah, it's this synthetic liquid

that I invented.

It's like crack for sharks.

- Brenda, Brenda, are you there?

Brenda?

- Uh, okay.

Hang on.

Just hang tight.

Oh, that looks terribly uncomfortable.

Here, let me get you...

Here, just wait right there

and I'm gonna. (groans)

You're a little bit, you'll be fine.

- [John] Brenda, are you there?

Brenda, come in.

- No, no, this is Jimmy.

Hello?

- Jimmy, what are you doing on my frequency?

Where Brenda?

- Uh...

Oh, she, well,

I don't really know

how to tell you this, but, your sister's...

- What?

- She was bitten in half by a shark.

Oh, my fault, it's my fault.

All of it's my fault.

The kids, my father, your sister.

All of them being dead, it's my fault, I...

- (sniffs) Jimmy, everybody thought the thing was dead.

We weren't positive that there were others out there.

- I knew.

- You knew?

When did you know?

- I saw another one just before the party started.

It ate Amanda.

- And he didn't tell anyone?

- I couldn't.

You don't understand.

If the party didn't go on, I'd be dead.

I mean, I am dead.

They're gonna kill me.

- They're not gonna have a chance to kill you,

because I'm gonna kill you.

15 people, including my sister,

died tonight because of you.

I'm placing you under arrest for criminal negligence.

- Why would you do that?

- For throwing a party, you idiot!

- But I didn't kill anyone.

Haven't I suffered enough?

- Oh, no, no, no, no.

You are gonna rot with guilt.

You may have not pulled the trigger,

but you supplied the bullet.

Or, in this case, the beach.

(whimpering)

(engine starting)

- John, I don't wanna belittle the tragedy

that's happened, but we're kind of stuck between a rock

and a shark place.

Any ideas on how to get off?

- Jimmy.

Jimmy, if you're there pick up the walkie.

- Go for Jimmy.

- Look, I...

I may have overreacted a little bit there.

You're still going jail,

I'm just not gonna kill you.

But we need,

we need your help.

- Uh John, we have a major situation at the docks.

- Jimmy, did you say that you had a situation on the rocks?

- I said docks.

At the docks.

It doesn't look very good.

There's people all over the place.

You may have a riot on your hands,

and the ferry doesn't show back up until late tomorrow.

- Jeez.

Jimmy, get those kids off the docks.

They can't handle that many people.

Can you do that?

- I got this.

- Just make sure we don't have

a repeat performance of earlier.

Now, crowds, they need to be handled with care.

And whatever you do, leave your siren off.

We don't wanna create a...

Oh, my God.

(people screaming)

Jimmy, get those people off the docks!

- I got this, I got this.

(megaphone beeping)

Oh God.

Okay, everybody, get off the pier as quickly as you can.

Run, run!

Go on, get out of here.

Scram, beat it.

Is everything okay?

Anybody need medical attention?

Anybody hurt?

Hey, you all right down there, kid?

You need help?

- He got trampled.

He can't breathe.

- Uh?

Hey, anybody here study medicine?

No?

Just hang in there, kid.

I'll get...

- (coughing) Sorry, dude, that was pretty good!

(both laughing)

- Oh, yeah, that's real funny.

You didn't realize that there's people out here

being eaten alive right now, huh?

Listen, listen to me.

I know this is gonna sound crazy,

but there are actually sharks in the sand.

No, you need to get off the beach right now.

You need to get up and you need to run and get

off of the beach, because, oh, my God.

You guys are idiots.

(growling)

Ugh.

Oh.

- Don't you got guns in there, brother?

- Uh, not that I know of, no, I think--

- Don't you got some at the station?

- Perhaps, I haven't checked.

- Tell you what, get back, get some firepower.

I'll handle things here.

- Um...

- If you're waiting for me, you're going backwards.

Run, run!

You wanna be shark bait?

Run!

Run, get out of here.

Get out of here, you hear me?

(frantic music)

- Whoa.

What are you doing here, I thought you were stuck on a rock?

- We were.

We got off.

And why aren't you at the docks helping those kids

like I told you?

- I told the kid to leave.

- Are you ever seen before you're heard?

And why'd you tell them to leave?

- Because I wasn't sure my gun would be enough.

- And? - It was.

- So the sharks are dead?

- Good lord, woman, no.

No, there's way too many of them sons of guns.

But I got everyone to safety I could.

- Well, thank you, Mr. McSorely.

We'll take it from here.

- You sure about that, son?

- It's sheriff.

And yeah, I am sure.

- 'Cause it seems to me that you folks have done

nothing but try to throw meatballs past a pack

of hungry dogs.

- I'm not sure what that means,

but we're getting ready to do something else.

- (laughing) With guns?

You think guns are gonna stop a pack

of man-eating sand terminators?

- What other choice do we have?

We got thousands of kids stuck on this island,

no way to get them off.

The ferry won't be here for another day.

- And waiting a day is too late.

By then, this island will be crawling with sand sharks.

If they've tasted blood, they'll keep coming back

for more, like a porker at a cupcake buffet.

- Yeah, well, if you're the expert, what should we do?

- I wouldn't call myself an expert,

but I have been hunting these meat-eating sand suckers

for years and years.

And the lass has got the right idea.

You can't kill these fish in conventional ways.

You gotta think outside the sandbox.

You gotta make the sand a sandbox.

and trap 'em in there like a giant shark tank.

- What the hell does that mean?

- Come with me.

I'll show youse.

(dramatic music)

- So just to be clear, you wanna lure the sharks

upstream and onto the beach,

and then melt the sand with electricity,

thus trapping them in a glass prison?

That's about right?

- Aye.

- You're gonna need a bigger beach, Angus.

- Uh-huh.

This is me sandbox.

I first saw them sharks 30 years ago diving

at the bottom of the ocean.

I knew back then it was a matter of time

before they came ashore.

- This is insane.

There's no way this is gonna work.

- What you mean, no way?

All we need's fuel hot enough to melt sand,

and the right bait to lure the sharks in here.

- Well, we still have plenty of people, human chum.

- You're an idiot, Jimmy.

What can we use for bait, Angus?

Nothing I've tried has brought enough of them together.

- What if we used the speakers from the party

and we put them in the sand?

Sharks are attracted to movement and vibration.

It'll work perfect.

- So you think you could draw enough sharks

from all over the island using record speakers?

- Record speakers.

(laughing) Now who's the idiot?

- Yes, if the vibrations were strong enough,

we could lure the sharks wherever we wanted them.

It just depends on how loud the speakers get.

- Well, if I turn mine up to 11,

it'll shake the entire island.

They're the best, I should know.

I paid for them.

- What about the fuel?

How hot does it need to be to melt the sand into glass?

- It needs to be a fuel that's gonna burn extra hot.

Over 2,000 degrees.

- I don't have anything like that.

- (clearing throat) I might.

- Really?

You have something that burns over 2,000 degrees?

- Maybe.

But I would need some type of proof that this is gonna work

before I'd be willing to break it out.

- This is a piece of the shark that ate Sparky.

(whimpering)

It's covered in glass.

from the sand and electricity.

- Well, is that proof enough for youse?

Hm?

Let's go fishing.

Come on.

(ominous music)

(horn honking) (dramatic music)

(grunting)

(engine revving)

- I love the smell of napalm in the afternoon.

- This is all you got?

- It's highly concentrated.

Trust me, a little bit goes a long way.

- (scoffing) We'll see.

- Napalm, baby.

Napalm.

- Better work.

Are you sure you got enough juice for this?

- Are you kidding?

I patched into the local grid.

- That's good to know the next time we have a power outage.

All right, everybody ready?

- Let's get this party started.

- Yeah.

("Ride of the Valkyries")

(rumbling)

- There's one.

There are two, hey!

They're starting to fill up the whole beach.

- [Together] Yeah!

- [Sandy] They think it's food.

- What?

Wait a minute.

What happened?

- The power's out.

- No, power's still on.

- That front speaker, it must have come unplugged.

- I'll go check it out.

- Are you nuts?

You can't go out there.

It's swarming with sand sharks.

You'll be fish food for sure.

- Unfortunately, she's right, John.

You wouldn't make it 10 feet with that leg.

I can't believe I'm gonna say this,

but I'll fix it.

- [Both] What?

- [John] Jimmy, you don't have to go.

- I'm going.

I got us into this mess, I'll get us out.

- Jimmy, you don't have to.

- This is something that I have to do.

For my father, your sister,

Sparky and all the rest of them.

I owe them a debt,

this is how I'm gonna repay it.

The show must go on.

- Jimmy, you know that this isn't a party

that ends at midnight.

It's your life.

- Once it's gone, party's over.

- I know.

- Jimmy.

Just in case.

- No, thanks.

I'm not planning on being out there long enough to use it.

- All right, good luck, Jimmy.

- I don't do that.

Don't worry, I got it!

Whoa!

Oh, oh!

- Come on, Jimmy.

- Oh.

- What's he waiting for?

The sharks are swarming all around him.

- It's not gonna work.

I can't fix it.

It's been ripped in half!

It's not gonna be fixable!

- There's got to be something else we can do.

They're all over him.

- Well, Pop, looks like I'll be joining you soon.

Oh.

- John, they're all over him.

We got to figure out how to help him.

♪ Row, row, row your boat

♪ Gently down the stream

♪ Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily ♪

♪ Life is but a dream

- Jimmy!

- Jimmy, no! - Stop!

♪ Gently down the stream - That's suicide, Jimmy!

Knock it off!

- Jimmy, stop! - Knock it off, Jimmy.

♪ Life is but a dream

♪ Row, row, row your boat gently ♪

- That's suicide, Jimmy, no!

♪ Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily ♪

♪ Life is but a dream

Come on, follow me.

♪ Row, row, row your boat

♪ Gently down the stream

- He's not gonna stop. - Jimmy, knock it off!

Jimmy, they're all coming towards you.

- Jimmy!

♪ Row, row, row your boat

♪ Gently down the stream

♪ Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily ♪

♪ Life is but a dream

- No!

♪ Ain't no party like a Sandman party ♪

♪ 'Cause the Sandman party don't stop ♪

- Oh!

- Jimmy. - Oh my God.

- God. - Jimmy.

- God. - Right, out the way.

Who's ready for some fried fish?

(panting)

- Jimmy.

(soft music)

Okay.

- I told you I'd bring their heads.

Hook, line and sinker.

(laughing)

- We did it.

- No. - We did it.

- Jimmy did it.

(Angus laughing)

- Yeah.

- Angus, where the hell did you get that flamethrower?

- Homemade.

Bought all the parts on eBay.

Which reminds me, now that the mayor's gone,

don't that make you acting mayor?

- Yeah, I think it does.

- So, what's the deal with the internet lately?

Huh?

It's...

It's been...

slower than death.

(roaring)

Uh-oh.

(yells)

- Jesus!

- Run. - Go inside.

(dramatic music)

(screaming)

Giant killer!

Get out!

(gun firing) Come on you mother!

The bullets aren't working!

Ah!

(roaring)

- Stop, stop!

Come on, get out of the way, jump out the window!

Out the window, it's the only way out.

Come on, let's go.

(panting)

- Eat this, you sand of a bitch!

(shark roaring)

(dramatic music)

(explosion booms)

(panting)

- Well, apparently, Dr. Powers,

sand sharks do turn into land sharks.

Ugh!

God.

(dramatic music)

- Hello?

Jimmy?

(cell phone vibrating)

Hello?

Oh, no, Mr. Green isn't here right now.

Oh, you can't reach him either?

That is actually because I am taking over his clients.

And you say you wanna throw a beach party?

Yes, yes, I can help you.

Beach parties are to die for.

(dramatic music)

(growling) (screaming)

(soft music)