Same Boat (2019) - full transcript

A time traveling assassin inadvertently falls in love with his target aboard a cruise ship.

How about a little
sunscreen action here?

There we go.

All right, so tell me your name?

David.

Boule.

Do something fun.

Something like sexy.

Uh huh and what would you
say if I were to tell you

that I slept with another man
last night?

Come on, drama.

Don't do that on our
honeymoon.



Come on.

I didn't.

It's our honeymoon.

But I did.

While we're on
our honeymoon, please.

But I didn't.

I don't wanna work on
the realism television

while we're on
our honeymoon please.

It's called reality TV.

Okay, whatever it
is I just like,

I wanna be intimate
and like together

and like come on.

- Just give me a hug.
- Oh my God no.

Get away from me.



What are you doing?

Ew.

Oh my God.

Happy honeymoon.

Happy honeymoon.

Beautiful day, huh?

Yeah.

Leah, right?

Leah Boule.

Yeah.

Sorry I don't think I know you.

Hey babe, Roman David
sculptor?

Not Michelangelo though.

Doesn't fit.

Bernini.

Oh.

Yeah, it fits.

Ah, what the?

Now?

Yes, Mot, now.

What are you doing?

Help, get off me.

You got this, Mot?

Who are you?

Get off me.

Hey, that's my fruit.

You're living in the
golden age of fruit, man.

Leah.

Baby, help.

She died peacefully.

What?

We work in television.

We just put in a in ground pool.

Beautiful.

Let me up.

Sorry for the delay.

I was gonna swim.

Goddamn.

I messed up, huh?

No, it's all right.

Mission complete.

I'd love to redo this mission.

He would die.

Yeah but if I didn't?

Yeah, but I just want
you to be sure you know

that if you redo a mission,
you die.

I just rather not humiliate
these people

even if they are bad.

I think all the trouble
started from your hesitation.

I just wanted
to be sure.

I know but in general,
once you get started,

it's best for everybody
if you just go for it.

What?

These two would've created
reality television,

warping people's ideas
of what is real

and accelerating the corrosive
effects of capitalism

leading to personal and
political cataclysm.

Yeah, they're bad for
humanity.

They're not bad people.

There's a difference.

You're gonna write that down?

Yeah.

I'm sorry if I messed up today.

Chin up, Mot.

There's always more
people to kill.

Come on.

Oh my gosh.

I've taken 900,000
steps this month.

Isn't that crazy?

Like, how do I do the extra
steps?

You know what I mean?

What was I doing?

Maybe I was at the mall or
something.

I don't even remember.

I would've thought
maybe like 800,000.

Rob.

But 900,000 steps crazy.

Rob.

Yeah, buddy.

Don't.

Not supposed
to call you buddy.

I think this was a mistake.

I'm breaking up with you.

But.

We just hit sail.

I got you some ice.

What am I supposed
to do with that?

I don't know.

Okay.

Do you get seasick often?

I'm so sorry.

It's okay.

It's okay.

It's okay.

How you feeling?

Sometimes after I vomit,
I feel rejuvenated.

Just take care of it.

I prefer to have
you come along.

You know, for learning.

What do you think?

Think I wanna be alone.

Oh okay.

Sure.

Turn off the lights.

And leave a bucket for my vomit.

Mot.

Mot.

Hey, Mot.

Mot.

Mot.

Oh, excuse me.

Say I wanted one of those.

I wanted one of those.

Sorry.

Idiomatic joke.

Ah, that's really good.

Thank you.

How do I get one?

Oh, you just go over there.

You get a cone.

You pull a lever.

Who do I pay?

No one.

Come on, buddy.

Time to wake up.

Get up, shit head.

Hey. Easy, Katja.

Come on.

Let's get you back to your room.

What time is it?

It's 7:00 a.m.

Oh no.

If you're worried about
missing church,

there's another
service at 4:00 p.m.

Okay, look at this guy.

He's not worried
about missing church.

He is an atheist.

Who's to say?

Who's to say?

No, she's right.

She's right.

I'm an atheist.

Although, I'm interested
in Buddhist thought.

Who fucking isn't?

You know, Richard Gere's
a Buddhist.

Richard Gere?

Richard Gere?

Anyone?

Maybe he's a Taoist.

I don't know.

I gotta go.

Yeah, no shit
Sherlock.

That is what we've
been saying to you.

Katja,
please just watch.

Okay.

Oh, sorry.

It's okay.

Have to clean these now.

Sh, sh, sh, sh, sh, sh, sh.

This could be you
but you playing.

My papers blew away.

I got locked out and I
had to sleep outside,

so it was a rough night.

Oh, you smell.

Yeah, I think I had a
pepperoni.

Here.

Well, I feel worse than
yesterday.

I threw up like seven times.

I got this.

Ugh, this is just what I need.

Hey, I think my abs got
strong from all the puking.

Here, check it out.

Nice.

Hit me.

I'm not gonna hit you.

Try it.

Ugh.

Wait a minute.

James.

Hey man.

Hi, do you know?

Hey, yeah.

Last night we met.

You were pretty drunk.

Oh yeah?

I stopped you from eating
some calamari that you found.

Oh thanks.

Well, you actually
ate it anyway.

Oh.

And then you gave
me some great advice

about my broken heart.

Oh yeah?

What I say?

You said live it up.

You're in a golden age.

You're a single man on a cruise
in the twilight of America.

Yeah, it sounds like
something I'd say.

You just saved my life.

What do you mean?

Yeah, I was gonna
jump off the boat.

Classic vacation suicide.

How is that classic?

Oh you don't know?

In the past 13 years,
over 200 people

have gone missing
from cruise ships.

Anyway, I'm thinking
of giving up.

What?

What about my advice?

I just keep thinking all the
things she's doing right now

and it kills me.

You know, camping with some guy.

Dancing.

She drops her umbrella and
he helps her pick it up.

Reading together.

They go to a slumber
party and she puts...

Listen.

Hey, listen.

She can't be doing all
of these things at once.

Feels like she is.

The person that you
love can only

be doing one thing
at any given time

and it's probably not even
the thing you're afraid of.

Sorry.

Your arm's a little heavy
on my shoulder.

Yeah okay.

Hey, you excited for pie?

What?

Key West tomorrow.

Key lime pie.

I'll buy you a slice.

Oh, I don't think I'm
gonna be here actually.

Damn, I love it.

You're a mysterious dude.

You got that right.

You ever fucked a felon?

Excuse me?

Have you ever fucked a felon?

I don't think that's
appropriate.

I came to sea to avoid
appropriate.

You know what they
said that the sea

is the last bastion of
truth and lewdness.

Quite the opposite actually.

Maritime law is far more severe

than any land based
law I'm aware of.

It's a bit part of the
reason why I came out here.

Have you?

Been with a felon?

No.

Shocker.

My college boyfriend.

He burnt down his preschool.

As an adult?

No, he was four.

Still turned me on.

I like you, Katja.

Kiss me.

It's wrong.

I'm your boss.

There's rules.

Rules are for fools.

I'm afraid you'll hurt me.

I'm counting on it.

Oh.

What's this?

Oh, it's like a...

Wait, I know you.

Who do I pay for soft serve?

Yeah.

Yeah?

- Yeah, that's right.
- No shoes.

See, the carpet is
really soft so.

This carpet?

Yeah.

I'm just trying to.

Eh.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

Oh, are you enjoying
your cruise?

Trying to.

Yeah.

Actually, do you know if
there's a good quiet bar

on this deck because
I really need a drink.

I don't drink.

Okay.

Okay.

See you around.

Yup.

Do.

I stopped using toilet paper
because it chafed my asshole.

You're a mess, Mot.

I know.

Can we leave?

Soon.

Tomorrow.

Okay.

Hey.

Thought I told you to
get off my ship.

Just kidding.

You should see the
look on your face.

It's not my ship.

Actually, a bunch of Greek dudes

own all of the cruise
ships in the world.

You mind if I join you?

Sure.

What are you doing all
by yourself in the library?

I just wanted to find a
quiet place to have a drink.

Oh, I'm Gary.

James.

James, nice to meet you.

Yeah.

James, let me ask you a
question.

Do you like magic?

'Cause you look like
a man who likes magic.

Can I do a trick for
you real quick?

Sure.

Yeah, okay.

So I have to shake
your hand again.

I totally screwed that up.

I should've shaked in your
hand in the first place,

but bear with me.

James, pleasure to meet you.

You look like you have the
silver touch.

Oh, oh, oh, okay.

But I have the golden touch.

Oh crap, sorry.

Oh, it's right there.

You got it?

Yeah, I got it.

Sacagawea.

Nice.

Eh, it was okay.

Ah, I always get like
you know nervous

at the point of completion,
you know.

So you're the cruise magician?

Funny story, no.

I actually I'm just in charge

of polishing the
rails and stuff.

General cleaning.

I kind of just throw
the magic in for free.

Awesome.

Well you know, I believe in
getting the job you don't want

and then turning it into
the job you do want.

Hey.

Heads up.

Well, well, well.

Oh hello.

Hi.

What's happening here?

Well this guy told me he
doesn't drink.

Oh, he drinks.

He's drinking right now.

I know.

International waters, guys.

Spill 'em.

What?

It's a tradition.

When you first hit international
waters,

you tell all your secrets.

I'll go first.

This is really generous and
nice.

I've actually been
cultivating this fantasy

of taking over the entire ship.

A mutineer.

Exactly.

So, I go down into the
corridor past the engineers

and like past luggage and
stowage

and then finally I get
into the captain's room.

And I say I'm taking
command of this ship.

Then I strangle him
and I shower.

I put on his jacket.

You know the ones
with like the golden.

Epaulets.

With epaulets, yeah.

Then I walk up to the
deck and take the helm.

And then what happens?

Where do you go?

I don't know.

I don't know how to ride a
boat, so I'm not gonna do it.

I'll see you guys.

Hey.

Well that was nice.

Yeah.

To international waters.

No rules.

For someone who doesn't drink,
you drink extremely fast.

Tonight has been very nice
and I'm gonna go to bed.

Guys, sorry.

There was a credit card minimum,

so I had to get two more drinks.

Some day.

I love being
on this boat.

It's growing on me.

I mean, it should be
disgusting.

It's all this waste and
consumption.

It isn't.

It's like.

Like I saw this grown woman
screaming at her mother

and it was like that is
you as a 12 year old.

It was very sweet.

It's like life.

We're all just squished
in here together.

We're trying to have fun.

Yeah.

What's your international
waters secret?

Well.

No secrets.

Bullshit.

Okay.

My secret is I don't
think I'm as good

at my job as everyone else does.

What do you do?

It's hard to explain.

Okay.

Well what's your percentage?

What's my what?

Your percent.

The percentage of
your job that you like

and that fills you up versus
the part that doesn't.

Like 18 or 20%.

That's the good part?

Yeah.

That's tough.

Oh yeah?

Yeah.

My percentage in the 70s.

Maybe even 80s.

Wow, that's very good.

I'm very good at my job.

I'm extremely good.

It's like I was born to do it,

but there was a time though
when it was really bad

and I figured out a
way to make it work.

What'd you do?

I just committed more
of myself to the job.

I figured being half in,
half out, that's a cop out.

So I just pushed through.

Yeah, that's smart.

Do you want another?

♪ There is a house
in New Orleans ♪

♪ They call the rising sun ♪

♪ And it's been the ruin
of many a poor boy ♪

♪ And God I know I'm one ♪

I was gonna say
don't start too high.

Oh.

Was that too high?

Yeah, yeah.

All right.

You got this?

♪ My mother was a tailor ♪

♪ She sewed my new blue jeans ♪

♪ My father was a gambling man ♪

♪ Down in New ♪

Ooh, it's chilly out
here in the waters.

Here.

No, I'm gonna stretch it out.

Whatever.

I make money.

Buy a new one.

Who cares?

Oh.

You are living in a
golden age of detergent.

Really?

Yeah.

I don't know.

Kind of think I over
wash my pants.

It's like I wash them
every time I wear them.

Yeah, you should.

- No.
- You should.

It's a golden age like I said.

What is with you
and golden age?

Do I say that a lot?

Yeah, you really say it a lot.

Well, I read it
once and I liked it.

I like how it sounds.

Golden age.

It's nice.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I got that way with
it's a live show, folks.

You know that one?

No.

What does that mean?

Like when I'm at work
if like I do something

and I make a mistake.

It's like it's a live show,
okay folks.

Give me a break.

Hey.

Doing my best.

I'm a human.

- Hey.
- Come on.

I like that.

I like it's a live show, too.

Hey, you wanna go up
and see if there's stars?

I guess.

There are no stars tonight.

I'm drunk.

I mean, my eyes are
as wide as they go.

There are no stars tonight.

I already said that.

Oh, I thought of that.

I didn't know if I had
said that or thought it.

Or you had said it.

Lilly, I have another
international waters

secret to tell you.

I've been sent from
the future to kill you.

Lilly.

Sorry, you seem so nice.

Golden age of not
seeing stars.

Ugh.

I don't eat chocolate that's
like any less

than 75% kakow okay
'cause it's low class.

That chocolate is
not for the crew.

It's for the guests.

They're not gonna miss
what they never had.

So I heard you
having sex last night.

Who'd you hear me
having sex with?

Rupert.

Oh yes.

Yes.

Mhm yeah.

That was, that was.

He's been looking good and
I like the way he smells.

I'm seeing tunnel
vision right now.

Okay, come on.

No, the only thing I can hear

is blood running
through my ear veins.

Katja.

Okay.

Okay.

You're okay.

Yeah.

I thought we were something.

We are something.

We're animals.

I'm sweating so
much right now.

Hell yeah 'cause
you're an animal, too.

You can stop your
body from passing out.

It's like you couldn't
stop having sex with Rupert.

Well he did beg me
to stop several times.

Hey Rob.

Rob.

Rob.

It's too tender, Lilly.

Listen, you know things
weren't great.

We haven't been intimate
in a very long time.

You mean romantic.

Yeah romantic.

Sex right.

Yeah.

I'm sorry.

I know it's been awhile.

I just I thought I didn't need
it anymore.

I know but I think
maybe you do.

Do you?

I failed you.

No.

I failed you.

Or no one failed anyone.

What was the best part
about being with me?

I never had to do anything.

What was the worst part?

I was constantly debating
whether liked you or not.

What about me?

Best thing?

You listened to me.

And the worst thing.

You dumped me.

Next level enter.

Have fun on Key West, Lilly.

Don't forget your sunscreen.

I won't, Lilly.

I won't.

Jaime.

Hey, man.

Whoa, Rob.

What, the hat?

Too much?

Kara said I looked great in it.

Who's Kara?

She's the woman selling hats.

That shirt though.

I'm living 100% on impulse
right now.

I took out all this cash to
swim and snorkel with dolphins,

but you know it's like John
Lennon said.

Who knows what's gonna happen?

Hey man, I'm going to the
Hemingway house.

Do you wanna come with me?

He killed himself.

Rob, you seem pretty amped
right now.

Are you okay?

I just wanna thank you, man,

for all the care and
concern you've shown me.

You're a really good friend.

I have to run.

I don't wanna miss anything
at the Hemingway house.

He killed himself.

Yeah, you already
mentioned that.

Yeah, even after he
wrote all those stories.

Well, he couldn't
have done it before.

Hey.

Hey Rob, I'm worried about you.

I've met you twice and you've
mentioned suicide three times.

I'll tone it down.

And.

I really think you should
turn the shirt inside out.

Wherever you go there's
bound to be kids.

And I think their parents
should be the ones

that teach them about...

Pounding pussy.

Yeah.

Okay, bud.

Okay.

You kill all these fish?

Who wants to know?

Aye, aye, aye, I ask
the questions around here.

This is a goddamn bloodbath.

Go easy.

Once I started, I couldn't stop.

I came by your place this
morning.

You weren't there.

Oh, work emails.

The law doesn't sleep I guess.

How'd you know I was a lawyer?

What?

Yeah, I'm a lawyer.

How'd you know?

Oh.

I don't know.

Maybe you said
something last night.

Did I?

Shit, what else did I say?

Nothing much.

That boring?

Yeah, but it was
wonderful boring.

Oh, this place is
supposed to be excellent.

Great.

Hold on.

Wanna scope things out a bit.

I don't know when I'm
gonna be here again.

I wanna make sure I
get the best pie.

Okay.

Oh, let's check this
one out.

Oh yeah.

Okay, I've got it.

Yeah, me too.

Yeah, ready?

Yeah.

This one.

- Same one.
- Yeah.

That's it.

- Oh yeah.
- This is it.

I'll always think of
that as our favorite.

Of course you will.

Why wouldn't you?

Where's it from?

Key West, Florida.

Which store?

I don't know because all
the pies have been mixed up.

This is good.

We're still free, right.

We've had the best pie,

but we still don't
know where it's from.

It's the best of both worlds.

You're a strange person,
James.

That's why we get
along so well.

Do we?

Yeah.

This is going really
great for the both of us.

So tonight we have
fancy dinner.

Who's we?

You and I together
if you're in.

I'm in.

It's a date.

I'll date you.

Lilly.

You're gonna die, girl.

I got your Hemingway
hats on sale for a buck.

I only got a couple left.

I'd be buried here.

Seems really peaceful.

There's coconuts here.

Strangers would
come and visit your grave.

Exactly.

Seems nice.

Yeah, until the
oceans rise.

That's not really
gonna happen.

I think so.

Cool.

I'll be underwater.

Sounds great.

Lilly.

I really liked today.

Me too.

Sorry.

No, no, no.

I'm sorry.

I thought.

It was like.

You're with someone.

No, no, no, no.

I have this agreement with
myself.

I'm just trying not to get
involved with anyone right now.

Okay.

But I want to.

And you smell like key lime pie.

You smell like key lime pie.

You're an enabler.

We ate too much pie.

Way too much pie.

Hey James.

Oh Rob.

You okay?

Never better.

You got a date for fancy dinner?

Actually I do.

Do people really call it that?

Fancy dinner.

Fancy diners say fancy
dinners.

You got a suit?

I don't but I don't feel like
this is...

Hey, why don't you
borrow one of mine?

No, I couldn't.

That's too generous of you.

It's all right.

- It's good.
- Pish posh.

I lucked out.

They usually don't have
extra rooms available,

but somebody died.

Swish.

Ca-ching.

Nice.

You like my suits?

Yeah, they're great.

Which one are you gonna wear

and then I'll just use
whichever one you're not...

Oh, I shan't be attending
fancy dinner.

What?

Come on, no.

You gotta come.

No, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no.

Here, I like this tie.

Thanks.

Allow me.

Father and son style.

Okay.

I know what you're doing on
the boat.

What's that?

Lilly.

Do you have something
you wanna tell me?

No.

- Ow.
- Say it.

Say it.

Rob.

Rob, that's a little tight.

Rob.

Say it.

I saw you making out with
Lilly, you son of a bitch.

Wait what?

Yeah.

My new best friend and
my new ex girlfriend.

We weren't.

Your ex girlfriend?

Making out in the graveyard
like a couple of sexy ghosts.

I didn't know that you
and Lilly were together.

Yeah, we've been to all
the bases

if that's what you wanna know,
you sicko.

Listen, Rob.

No.

- No.
- I'm sorry.

It makes sense.

You're great.

Lilly's great.

It's just sad.

I could tell from the
graveyard kisses

that this is a good thing.

I had this stupid plan to
sabotage you

by giving you an ugly tie.

Here.

This one's nice.

It's very fancy.

It's a Kenneth Cole reaction.

Thanks.

You know, Rob, you are a nice
guy.

You're very generous.

If it makes you feel any
better, we didn't actually kiss.

Save it, Romeo Montague.

Thank you for making
me a better person.

Thank you for making me fancy.

You can't make someone
fancy if they weren't already.

I just showed you how
fancy you already are.

Hi, room service please.

Hi.

What happened?

I got slammed with work.

I'm so sorry.

How was it?

I saved you some.

What is this?

Oh no.

That's so nice of you.

It's really romantic
of you for this

if it makes you think of me.

Do you wanna get whiskies?

I was gonna say do
you wanna get ice cream?

Yes.

Ice cream and then drinks?

All right great.

Done.

So.

Dance.

I like how I
feel when I'm with you.

You give me hope.

Hope.

Yeah.

You help me believe in the
things that I wanna believe in.

Like what?

That good things can still
come.

That life can get better all of
a sudden.

Yeah.

I know what you mean.

When I'm with you I feel
like I don't know have

to divide myself against myself,
you know.

I can just completely
be the thing that I am.

This feels really good.

You know?

Gotta go.

What?

I gotta go do something
then I'll come right back.

This is so weird.

I know but I'll be right back.

I'll be quick.

Are you gonna go jerk off or
something?

No, masturbate?

No, no.

Why would you think that I
would?

I mean, look at me.

No, I'm not gonna.

I mean, I know that the
more that I talk about it,

seems like I might do it
but I'm not gonna do it.

I know a masturbator when I
see one.

What can I say to you to prove

that I'm gonna jerk off right
now?

You just said it.

No, no, no, not jerk off.

Too late.

No jerking off.

Bye, bye, have fun.

All right, I'll be quick.

Be right back.

Okay.

Okay.

- That's the last one.
- Okay.

- I mean for now.
- Okay.

There'll be many more.

There'll be a lifetime
of kisses after this.

Wow.

Well one casual evening of
kisses

and then we'll take it from
there.

Did I give you the gift?

Shark mouth?

Yeah, I did.

- Yeah.
- Good.

I like you.

I like you.

Oh Mot, you're feeling better.

Yeah, thank God.

We ready to go?

That's the thing.

I wanted to do something,

but I wanted to talk to you
first about it

because I wanna be honest.

That sounds like
something someone

who hasn't been honest says.

No.

I think I'm in love.

With her?

Ow.

You let me stay here
sick while you lied to me?

Mot, uncle, uncle.

Ow.

Yeah.

I was enjoying the cruise.

They have great fruit
and endless ice cream.

Anyway, my papers blew away
and I got a drink with Lilly

and then today we almost
kissed in a graveyard.

Well, that sounds romantic.

Yeah, it was.

Okay, well I'll do it then.

No, Mot, you don't understand.

I don't want you to do it.

You're on a cruise.

I'm sick.

The cat was away so the mouse
did play.

You're not the cat.

I'm the cat.

The mouse got sick and
the cat had free time

for the first time in awhile,

so he took care of himself for a
change.

Our work is lonely but
it is an honor to be...

Okay.

- I get it.
- Not finished.

Chosen to travel through time.

The future trusts us to help
them.

When I get gloomy, I
just think of that trust.

Don't throw my own
words back in my face.

Do you think it fulfills me

to hold the hands of little
brats?

To cover their fuck
ups again and again

as they continue to
maim and traumatize

and drive men to emotional
breakdowns

where they kneel on their backs.

James, I didn't
mean to do that.

You didn't wanna get
sick all over yourself?

Make me have to
clean up after you.

Wait on you hand and foot.

Goddammit, Mot.

You think I'm a stupid brat?

No.

I'm sorry.

Are you okay?

I didn't mean that stuff.

That was wrong.

It won't happen again.

I will do it.

I can do it.

Can you?

You know I can.

Would a deadline help?

Maybe.

Okay.

Sunrise tomorrow.

No, there's a 7:00 a.m. yoga
class I wanna check out,

so let's say eight, 8:30.

Okay.

Everyone thinks you're
the best.

James.

Yo, what's up, man?

Hey.

How's it going?
What are you doing?

I'm just thinking.

Nice, nice.

Ah.

Can I show you a trick real
quick?

Sure.

So, this is an ordinary
cigarette, right.

Watch this.

Ooh.

What do you think?

I kinda hate it.

I think it's great.

You liked it?

Yeah.

Yeah, I'm proud of it.

It's good.

You look sad.

I am sad.

Women?

No.

Well kinda I guess, yeah.

I knew it.

Here's my advice.

Keep your promise to
whoever got there first.

I made a promise to one woman,

but what about a promise to
myself?

Well that sounds like
you're talking about polygamy

or at least that's what I'm
getting.

Have you seen the motion
picture "The Short Bus"?

No, what's it about?

I don't really know actually

to be the more I think about it,

but there are a lot of like
really raw, explicit sex scenes

with non actors in it so.

Anyway.

I guess I just feel trapped.

Well, do you know
Harry Houdini?

Yeah.

Great.

Okay, this is perfect.

So he said and this is actually

like perfect advice for your
situation.

Kind of wish there was some
other people here to see this.

You know?

Because it's so rare that you
have

like a perfectly apt,
concise whatever, you know.

Anyways, he said
that sometimes the task

before me is very hard but
one thought fills my mind.

To get free.

To get free.

The intoxication of that
freedom that success is sublime.

Get free, huh?

Yeah, the success is sublime.

Well.

I gotta go.

Some kids have been
clogging up the shitters

and it's a fucking fiasco.

I'll tell you.

The things people do to toilets
when they're on vacation.

It's vulgar.

They don't have to clean it up.

I have to clean it up.

I'll tell you.

I mean, human beings are
complicated.

All right, goodnight, buddy.

You'll figure it out.

Hi.

Hi.

I wanna be with you.

I don't wanna get old.

You have to.

There's this Japanese phrase.

It's.

What's it mean?

Untranslatable.

Oh.

Yeah.

- Well.
- Yeah.

No, it means like

sadness of time passing.

Come back to sleep.

Lilly.

I'm very hungry.

Me too.

I'll get us breakfast.

Okay, I'll come with you.

No.

I wanna help.

Stay.

Okay.

I'll BRB.

BRB?

Be right back.

Oh yeah, BRB.

Yeah.

Those are my pants.

Are they?

Have fun.

Housekeeping.

Someone's showering.

Wait, we'll come back later.

Wait.

Let's be bad.

Hey, Lilly.

How's it going?

Hi.

Can I show you a magic
trick real quickly?

- Absolutely, yes.
- Awesome.

Okay sweet.

So here, pick a card.

Okay.

Doesn't matter which one.

There you go.

All right, now put it in
the middle of the deck.

There you go.

Now I'm gonna cut it once.

Okay.

All right.

And then I'm gonna
cut it again twice.

Okay.

Is this your card?

- No.
- No?

Oh, that's the instructions.

That's not even a card.

Okay, that's fine.

What about this one?

No, that's a joker.

That is a joker.

Dammit.

This one?

It's the joker again.

Another joker, crap.

Yeah.

It's a work in progress.

I liked the beginning.

Okay, that's something.

That's something.

I'll take it.

Yeah.

Actually, you know what?

Do me a favor.

Check your pocket.

- Yeah.
- This pocket?

That pocket.

Check it.

Okay.

- Oh.
- Right.

Tada.

What?

That's your card, yeah.

Yeah, I know.

That's really good.

Thank you.

What the hell is this?

The ace of spades.

Well the ace of clubs.

Or wow.

That's actually the best
reaction I've ever gotten.

Who are you?

Hello, madam.

Busted.

Get out.

Get out.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yes, yes, yes, yes.

Got it, got it, got it.

Got no key and can't go wrong.

Who are these people?

Oh god.

Lilly.

Whoever she is, she's
not better than you.

It's me.

Okay.

Lilly, I can explain
this.

How'd you get this?

Get the fuck out.

Lilly, please.

Will you just listen?

Take all your shit.

Get the fuck out of here.

Listen.

I can explain.

Go.

You're wearing my
pants.

Turn around.

- Don't want you looking at me.
- But we already.

Yeah, yeah.

That's before I knew
you're some kind

of creepy fucking stalker.

How'd you find
all this shit out?

Lilly.

This is a lot but just please.

Well first thing is I
think I'm in love with you.

I mean I know I'm
in love with you.

I love you.

And I'm also sent from
the future to kill you,

which I'm not gonna do.

I won't do it.

I just wanna stay
here with you forever.

We can grow old
together and be free.

Lilly.

Say something.

Put some pants on,
James.

Mot, no.

I gotta do it, James.

Mot, please don't.

Stop, put it down.

Put down the device.

No.

Please.

- No.
- Listen.

Look at your device.

Here, look at mine.

What's it supposed to say?

Pending.

What does it say?

There's three dots.

See.

Is this your wife?

Mot?

No.

Not my wife, no.

He's kind of my boss.

I think of it as more of like
a mentorship or partnership.

Anyway, he's supposed
to kill you.

What?

But he hasn't

because he thinks he's in love
with you.

But we're not in love.

We just met.

I feel it.

James usually spends a
very short amount of time

with the people that he meets
and then he has to kill them.

So this past four days have
been like a summer for James.

How did you expect to be able to
kill her?

We don't have to do like.

Just everyone if we could just.

James?

I just.

James?

Hey James.

You all right?

I have vasovagal response.

I pass out when I panic.

Hi, door was open.

I'm coming in.

Lilly, your pants.

James, your pants.

Oh, I get it.

What do you get?

Sex stuff.

Hi, I don't know you.

I'm Rob.

I used to date Lilly and
I'm new friends with James

who now dates Lilly.

I'm Mot.

Oh, and what do you do, Ot?

Mot.

Mot.

She's a time traveling
assassin.

Okay, I guess everyone's gonna
know now.

So am I.

They're gonna kill me.

What?

She discovers a legal loophole

that allows for rampant
pollution.

Really?

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

You get assassinated for that?

Rob, what are you doing here?

Oh, Lilly.

I wanted to see if you
might still love me.

Sorry James.

I understand.

Rob.

I watched the sunrise and I
thought

even though we're not together,

we still live on the earth
in the same time together.

Statistically it's so unlikely.

Even though I'm sad I can't be
with you,

we're both so close
on this boat.

I just felt purely grateful
that I can see things

as they really are even for a
moment.

We're here together and that's
incredible.

Well thanks, Rob.

So what do you think?

I'm not getting back together.

Is he a better kisser than me?

Okay, that's enough.

You know what?

I'm actually starving.

Does anybody else wanna get
breakfast?

Rob, I don't think...

Actually I could eat.

Yeah sure.

Okay.

Great.

Hi, yeah.

We're gonna order some
breakfast.

Can I get scrambled eggs and
pancakes?

Do they do oatmeal?

Do you do oatmeal?

They do.

Great, some oatmeal.

The usual.

Two eggs over easy.

Rye toast well done.

A fruit plate,
six hard boiled eggs,

and ask about the breakfast
sandwiches.

Do you guys do breakfast
sandwiches?

Oh actually that sounds really
good.

Can I cancel my order?

No scrambled eggs, no
pancakes, and do one of those.

They have something called the
cap.

It's called the ship's captain.

It's bacon, egg, and cheese
on white bread with aioli.

Sure.

Great.

All right, fantastic.

I want pancakes.

In addition to or
instead of the oatmeal?

Instead of.

You know what?

Let's 86 the oatmeal.

Go with some pancakes.

Recap.

Two ship's captain, six hard
boiled eggs, one fruit plate,

two eggs over easy, rye
toast well done, pancakes.

Just get a mess of hash
browns for everybody.

Great.

Thanks.

Screw it.

Shit, I forgot drinks.

I think you're nuts.

Makes sense to me.

These people are not
from the future, Rob.

I don't know.

Are you familiar with Moore's
law?

Every year technology doubles.

If we can land a rocket right
side up,

I don't see why we can't
send people through time.

I mean, I'm not crazy about
the whole killing people part.

It's insane.

Haven't figured it all out,

but I think we discovered a way

that we can change the future
without killing people.

Like last night when we
were talking I felt like...

Why didn't you kill me then?

Excellent question,
Lilly.

I don't wanna kill you.

I like you.

Anyway, the plan was to kill
you,

but when we were talking last
night

about your secret self just
doing nothing right before we.

What?

Nothing.

No, tell us.

We slept together.

Does that answer your
question, Lilly?

Mot, hear me out.

Our device is supposed to
say pending or complete.

Right now it says dot dot dot.

I think that means we
don't have to kill you.

Or it means it's broken and
we're trapped here forever.

Mot, we can change the
future just by being kind.

By being good to people.

By helping them feel free
to be whoever they are.

I know what you're talking
about.

I was at Madison Square Garden

and I started this let's go
Rangers chant.

And I first it was only me,
you know.

Let's go, Rangers.

But then a couple more people
did it and then a couple more

and all of a sudden everyone was
doing it.

Let's go, Rangers.

And I looked around and
I was like I did this.

I made all these people happy,
you know.

And it wasn't even a hockey
game.

It was a Billy Joel concert.

See?

See what?

That guy's story.

People just wanna
feel like they're okay.

Lilly.

You're okay.

Rob.

You're okay.

Mot.

You're okay.

You know inside yourself
the right thing to do.

Lilly.

What are you doing?

I'm just trying to trust my
instincts.

I was just explaining
to you what was happening.

Yeah, but you told me
that once it gets going,

it's better for everyone
to just finish it.

We didn't
have to kill her.

Yeah, but now we can leave.

Ah.

James?

Ah.

Ow.

I'm so sorry.

Sh.

Don't leave me.

I won't.

I'm here.

This is nice.

For $40 more dollars
you get the balcony.

Here.

Read this.

No, read it out loud.

No, to me.

I'm dying.

Okay, okay.

Sh, sh.

Why did it take so long
for me to get lenient?

What does it mean?

One life only?

Oh my god.

Water's perfect.

It's a little too salty though.

I don't like burning my eyes.

Ah, that's awful.

Oh, I shouldn't.

You still sad?

Yeah.

What happened?

Just killed everybody
I ever loved.

Yikes.

Now what?

I don't know.

Come on.

You need a swim.

Let's go.

Come on.

In the water, buddy.

Beautiful friendship.

I have a time traveling
question.

Yeah.

Why didn't you kill
Hitler?

We did.

We killed Hitler like 400 times.

I don't know.

There's still a Hitler.

Yeah well the person who
does whatever Hitler does,

kind of keeps coming up.

It's like at school when
the bad kid was absent,

someone else would step
up and be bad.

God, that's depressing.

Hey, why don't you
just go back in time

and save your friends?

If we redo a mission, we die.

Why?

Well, think of it like
you're on a roller coaster.

You wanna go back to the
beginning of the roller coaster.

You can but you take some
of the track with you,

so that when you get back
to that point of the track,

you fall off then you die.

Oh, you take the
track with you.

Yeah.

Yeah actually you know,

my favorite part of a roller
coaster is always the ascent

'cause that's the only
time you can talk

to the people around you.

The rest of it's just
screaming, puking, and barfing.

Hey, see how long I
can hold my breath for.

Where you going?

I gotta go talk to
other people on the ride.

There's no roller
coasters in Cozumel.

No, remember the metaphor
we were just talking about?

You're going back in time?

Yeah.

Take me with you.

Why?

I lost my wallet.

Where's the last place
you remember having it?

But now it's all wet.

You're a good person, James.

Hey.

Hey.

Great work.

Oh, thank you, sir.

This might not make sense,

but take your wallet
out of your pants

before you go swimming in
Cozumel.

Okay.

Did you get the ice?

You look different.

I got you some
Dramamine and an egg.

Mot, I'm redoing this mission.

Already, what happened?

No, I mean, I already
restarted it.

James, why?

Is this my blood?

Yeah.

Did I die?

Yes.

How did I die?

A tiny knife.

Lame.

So you came back to save me.

I came back to teach you
something.

Okay, what's the lesson?

We don't have to kill people.

We can make them change
through kindness and attention.

Wow, that sounds really weak.

I know.

I got part of the way there,

but then it went bad.

How?

It's not important.

It's good to see you.

Do you have a second to talk?

Hi.

Lilly.

Nice to meet you.

You do good work.

Had a good teacher.

Here.

This is yours, but I wrote you
something.

So what are you gonna do now?

Enjoy the cruise I guess.

They really didn't
leave any color behind.

Yeah, I'm just trying to
find a way to enjoy these.

These aren't real paintings.

These are prints that some
computer puts paint on top of

to make them seem real.

It's capitalism at work.

Well, now I can not like them

and not feel bad for the artist.

It's just computers somewhere.

It's a relief.

No, that's a leather-graft.

Guitar joke.

It's very good.

Thank you.

Well, enjoy trying
to enjoy them.

Will do.

There they are.

You see this?

You know, she was
my mentor for awhile.

She really that good?

Oh yeah.

People just instantly connected
to her.

She hates boats.

Boats?

For me, it's spiders.

Yeah?

They move so quick

and nothing should have that
many legs.

Good point.

All right, let's go meet
David and Leah Boule.

Are you really afraid of
spiders?

Yeah, they're
terrifying.

New?

Ready for pie?

What?

I said ready for pie.

You better hurry if you want
pie.

Pie?

Pie, sir.

Key lime pie.

It's holly bistro.

It's pastry stroll.

It's very real.

We just stopped ashore
at Key West

and everyone's hungrily
in search of pie.

I could get some pie.