Roman Holiday (1953) - full transcript

Paramount News
brings you a special coverage...

of Princess Ann's
visit to London...

the first stop on her much-publicized
goodwill tour of European capitals.

She gets a royal welcome
from the British...

as thousands cheer
the gracious young member...

of one of Europe's
oldest ruling families.

After three days
of continuous activity...

and a visit
to Buckingham Palace...

Ann flew to Amsterdam...

where Her Royal Highness dedicated
the new international aid building...

and christened an ocean liner...



then went to Paris...

where she attended
many official functions...

designed to cement trade relations
between her country...

and the Western European nations.

And so, to Rome,
the eternal city...

where the princess's visit was marked
by a spectacular military parade...

highlighted by the band
of the crack Bersagliere Regiment.

The smiling young princess
showed no sign...

of the strain of the week's
continuous public appearances.

And at her country's embassy
that evening...

a formal reception and ball
in her honor...

was given by her country's
ambassador to Italy.

Her Royal Highness.

His Excellency,
the Papal Nuncio...



Monsignor Altomonte.

Sir Hugo Macey de Farmington.

- Good evening, Sir Hugo.
- Good evening, Your Royal Highness.

His Highness,
the Maharajah of Khanipur...

and the Rajkumari.

- I'm so glad that you could come.
- Thank you.

Thank you, madame.

Prince Istvar Barlossy Nagayavaros.

How do you do?

Sir Hari Singh...

and Karak Singh.

The Count and Countess
von Marstrand.

Good evening, Countess.

Good evening.

Good evening.

How do you do?

I hate this nightgown.

I hate all my nightgowns.

And I hate all my underwear too.

My dear,
you have lovely things.

But I'm not 200 years old.

- Why can't I sleep in pajamas?
- Pajamas?

Just the top part.

Did you know there are people who sleep
with absolutely nothing on at all?

I rejoice to say that I did not.

Listen.

Oh, and your slippers.

Please put on your slippers
and come away from the window.

Your milk and crackers.

Everything we do
is so wholesome.

They'll help you to sleep.

I'm too tired to sleep.
I shan't sleep a wink.

Now, my dear, if you don't mind,
tomorrow's schedule.

Or schedule. Whichever you prefer.
Both are correct.

8:30, breakfast here
with the embassy staff.

9:00, we leave for
the Polinari Automotive Works...

where you'll be presented
with a small car.

Thank you.

- Which you will not accept.
- No, thank you.

10:35, inspection of food
and agricultural organization...

which will present you
with an olive tree.

- No, thank you.
- Which you will accept.

Thank you.

10:55, the new
Foundling Home for Orphans.

You will preside over the laying of the
cornerstone. Same speech as last Monday.

- Trade relations.
- Yes.

For the orphans?

No, no, the other one.

- Youth and progress.
- Precisely.

11:45, back here to rest.

No, that's wrong.
11:45, conference here with the press.

Sweetness and decency.

1:00 sharp, lunch with
the foreign ministry.

You will wear your white lace
and carry a bouquet of...

Very small pink roses.

3:05, presentation of a plaque.

Thank you.

4:10, review special guard
of Carabiniere Police.

No, thank you.
How do you do?

Charmed.
So happy.

Stop!

Stop, stop, stop!

It's all right, dear.
It didn't spill.

I don't care if it spilled or not.
I don't care if I drowned in it!

My dear, you're ill.

I'll send for Dr. Bonnachoven.

I don't want Dr. Bonnachoven!

- Please let me die in peace.
- You're not dying.

Leave me!

- Leave me!
- It's nerves.

Control yourself, Ann.

I don't want to!

Your Highness.

I'll get Dr. Bonnachoven.

It's no use.

I'll be dead
before he gets here.

- She is asleep.
- She was in hysterics three minutes ago.

- Are you asleep, ma'am?
- No!

I'll only disturb
Your Royal Highness for a moment.

I'm very ashamed.

Suddenly I was crying.

To cry is a perfectly normal
thing to do.

It's most important she be calm
and relaxed for the press conference.

Don't worry, Doctor.

I'll be calm and relaxed.

I'll bow and I'll smile and...

I'll improve trade relations and...

There she goes again, Doctor.
Give her something, please.

Uncover her arm, please.

What's that?

Sleep and calm.

This will relax you and make
Your Highness feel a little happy.

It's a new drug.
Quite harmless.

There.

I don't feel any different.

You will.

It may take a little time
to take hold.

Just lie back.

Can I keep just one light on?

Of course.

Best thing I know is to do
exactly what you wish for a while.

Thank you, Doctor.

Oh, the general!
Doctor, quick!

I'm perfectly all right.

Good night, ma'am.

- Good night, ma'am.
- Good night, Doctor.

Bet 500.

Five hundred.
How many?

One.

I'll take one.

Three.

Foolish boy.

Two for papa.

Five hundred more.

Without looking.

Five hundred,
and I'll raise you a thousand.

Two pairs.

Oh, well, I got
three shy little sevens.

A nervous straight.

Come home, you fools.

Look at that... 6,500.

Not bad.
That's ten bucks.

One more round and I'm gonna throw
you gents right out in the snow.

- Say, what do you mean?
- I gotta get up early.

A date with Her Royal Highness who
will graciously pose for some pictures.

What do you mean "early"?
My personal invitation says 11:45.

Couldn't be anything to do
with the fact that you're ahead?

- It could.
- Well, it works out fine for me.

This is my last 5,000,
and you hyenas are not gonna get it.

Thanks a lot, Irving. See you
at Annie's little party in the morning.

- "Ciao", Joe.
- Good night, Joe.

All right,
a little seven-card stud.

Okay with me.

So happy.

How are you this evening?

Hey, wake up.

- Thank you very much. Delighted.
- Wake up.

No, thank you.

Charmed.

Charmed too.

You may sit down.

I think you'd better sit up. Much too
young to get picked up by the police.

- Police?
- Yep. Police.

2:15, and back here to change.

2:45...

You know, people who can't
handle liquor shouldn't drink it.

"If I were dead and buried
and I heard your voice...

beneath the sod
my heart of dust...

would still rejoice."

Do you know that poem?

What do you know?

You're well-read...

well-dressed...

and snoozing away
on a public street.

Would you care
to make a statement?

What the world needs...

is a return
to sweetness and decency...

in the souls
of its young men and...

Yeah, I couldn't agree
with you more, but...

Get yourself some coffee.
You'll be all right.

Look, you take the cab.

Come on, climb in the cab
and go home.

- So happy.
- Got any money?

- Never carry money.
- That's a bad habit.

All right, I'll drop you off.
Come on.

- It's a taxi.
- Well, it's not the Super Chief.

Where are we going?

Where do you live?

Coliseum.

Oh, come on.
You're not that drunk.

You're so smart.
I'm not drunk at all.

I'm just being very happy.

Don't go to sleep again.
Come on.

Where we going?

Look, where do you want to go?
Where shall I take you?

Where do you live?
Huh? Huh?

Come on. Come on.
Where do you live?

Come on.
Where do you live?

Coliseum.

She lives in the Coliseum.

Is wrong address.

Look, "signore", for me
it is very late night.

"Mia moglie"... My wife.

I have three "bambino"...
You know "bambino"?

My taxi go home.
I go home together. Excuse me...

Via Margutta 51.

Here is Via Margutta 51.
Cinquant'uno.

I am very happy.

Thousand lira.

One, two, three, four "mille".

Okay.

For me?

Now look,
take a little bit of that...

take her wherever
she wants to go.

Good night.

All right, look...

as soon as she wakes up
she'll tell you where she wants to go.

- Okay.
- Moment. Moment.

My taxi is not for sleep.

Understand?
You understand?

Look, pal,
this is not my problem, see?

I never see her before.
Huh? Okay.

Is not your problem.
Is not my problem.

What you want?
You don't want girl, yeah?

Me don't want girl.

Police.
Maybe she want girl.

Stay calm, stay calm.

So happy.

So happy.

I oughta have
my head examined.

Is this the elevator?

It's my room.

I'm terribly sorry
to mention it, but...

the dizziness is getting worse.

Can I sleep here?

Well, that's the general idea.

Can I have a silk nightgown
with rosebuds on it?

I'm afraid you'll have to
rough it tonight...

in these.

Pajamas.

Sorry, honey, but I haven't
worn a nightgown in years.

Will you help me
get undressed, please?

Okay.

There you are.
You can handle the rest.

May I have some?

No.

Now, look...

This is very unusual.

I've never been alone
with a man before...

even with my dress on.

With my dress off,
it's most unusual.

I don't seem to mind.

Do you?

I think I'll go out
for a cup of coffee.

You'd better get to sleep.

On this one.

Terribly nice.

These are pajamas.

They're to sleep in.
You're to climb into them.

- You understand?
- Thank you.

Then you do your sleeping
on the couch, not on the bed.

Not on the chair.
On the couch. Is that clear?

- Do you know my favorite poem?
- You already recited that for me.

"Arethusa arose
from her couch of snows...

in the Acroceraunian Mountains."

- Keats.
- Shelley.

You just keep your mind off the poetry
and on the pajamas.

Everything will be all right.

- Keats.
- Shelley. I'll be back in ten minutes.

Keats.

You have my permission...

to withdraw.

Thank you very much.

- Well?
- No trace, Your Excellency.

- Have you searched the grounds?
- From the attics to the cellar, sir.

I must put you on your honor
not to speak of this to anyone.

I must remind you that the princess
is the direct heir to the throne.

This must be classified
as top crisis secret.

Have I your pledge?

- Yes, sir.
- Very well.

Now we must notify
Their Majesties.

So happy.

The pleasure's mine.

Screwball.

Holy smoke.
The princess interview.

11:45.

Hi, Joe.

- Good morning, Joe.
- Hello, honey.

Mr. Hennessy
has been looking for you.

Uh-oh.

Thanks a lot, hon.

Come in!

- You been looking for me?
- Just coming to work?

Who, me?

We start our days at 8:30
in this office.

- We pick up our assignments...
- I picked mine up last night.

- What assignment was that?
- The princess, 11:45.

You've already been
to the interview?

Sure.
I just got back.

Well, well, well.

All my apologies.

- It's all right.
- Very interesting.

- Just routine.
- She answered the questions on the list?

Well, of course she did.

- I've got them right here somewhere.
- Don't disturb yourself.

I have a copy here.

How did Her Highness react to the idea
of a European federation?

She thought it was just fine.

She did?

Well, she thought
there would be two effects.

Two.

The direct and the indirect.

Remarkable.

Naturally, she thought that
the indirect would not be as direct...

as the direct.

At least not right away.

Later on, of course,
well, nobody knows.

Well, well, well.

That was a shrewd observation.

They fool you, these royal kids.

They've got a lot more on the ball
than we suspect.

How did she feel about
the future friendship of nations?

Youth.

She felt that
the youth of the world...

must... lead the way...

to a better...

world.

Original.

By the way,
what was she wearing?

Oh, you mean
what did she have on?

Well, that's usually
what it means.

What's the matter?
Little warm for you?

No, I just hurried over here.

Naturally, with a story
of these dimensions.

Did you say
she was wearing gray?

- No, I didn't say that.
- Well, she usually wears gray.

Oh. Well, it was
a kind of a gray.

I think I know the dress you mean.
It has a gold collar.

That's the one. I didn't know exactly
how to describe it, but that's it.

I think you described it
very well...

in view of the fact that Her Highness
was taken violently ill at 3:00 a.m...

put to bed with a high fever...

and has had all her appointments
for today cancelled in toto!

In toto?

Yes, Mr. Bradley.

In toto.

That's certainly
pretty hard to swallow.

In view of the fact
that you just left her, of course.

But here it is, all over the front page
of every newspaper in Rome.

All right, all right, I overslept.
It could happen to anybody.

If you ever got up early enough
to read a morning paper...

you might discover
little news events...

little items
of general interest...

that might prevent you in the future
from getting immersed...

in such a gold-plated, triple-decked,
star-spangled lie as you just told me.

If I were you, I'd try some other line
of business, like mattress testing.

Is this the princess?

Yes, Mr. Bradley,
that is the princess.

It isn't Annie Oakley, Dorothy Lamour
or Madame Chiang Kai-shek.

Take a good look at her. You might be
interviewing her again someday.

Am I fired?

No, you're not fired.

When I want to fire you,
you won't have to ask.

You'll know you're fired.

The man's mad.

Giovanni, it's Joe Bradley.

Now listen carefully.

I want you to hurry up to my place and
see if there's somebody there asleep.

"Sí", Mr. Joe.

I look... "subito".

You wait... "aspetta".

Mr. Joe?

Yeah... Yeah, yeah.
Tell me, tell me.

Giovanni, I love you.
Now, listen...

Yes, Mr. Joe.

A gun?

No!

Yes, a gun, a knife, anything!

But nobody goes in,
and nobody goes out.

Okay.

You still here?

How much would a real interview
with this dame be worth?

You mean Her Highness?

I don't mean Annie Oakley,
Dorothy Lamour or Madame... How much?

What do you care?
You got as much chance...

I know, but if I did,
how much would it be worth?

Oh, just a plain talk on
world conditions might be worth 250.

Her views on clothes, of course, would
be worth a lot more. Maybe a thousand.

- Dollars?
- Dollars.

I'm talking about her views
on everything.

The private and secret longings...

of a princess.

Her innermost thoughts, as revealed
to your Rome correspondent...

in a private, personal...

exclusive...

interview.

Can't use it, huh?

I didn't think you'd like it.

Come here.

Love angle too, I suppose.

Practically all love angle.

With pictures.

Could be. How much?

That particular story would be worth
five grand to any news service.

But tell me, Mr. Bradley,
if you are sober...

just how you are going to obtain
this fantastic interview.

I plan to enter her sick room
disguised as a thermometer.

You said five grand?
I want you to shake on that.

You realize Her Highness is in bed today
and leaves for Athens tomorrow.

I'd like to make
a little side bet with you.

Five hundred says
you don't come up with the story.

- What are you looking at that for?
- I just want to see what time it is.

What day it is.

- It's a deal.
- Now I'd like you to shake.

You're into me
for about 500 now.

When you lose this bet,
you'll owe me a thousand.

Why, you poor sucker.
I'll practically own you.

You have practically owned me for
a couple of years, but that's all over.

I'm gonna win that money, and I'm gonna
buy a one-way ticket back to New York.

Go on.
I love to hear you whine.

And when I'm back in a real newsroom,
I'll enjoy thinking about you...

sitting here with an empty leash in
your hands and nobody to twitch for you.

So long, pigeon.

- Everything okay, Giovanni?
- "Sí", Signore Joe.

Nobody she's come,
nobody she's go.

- Absolutely nobody.
- Swell.

Thanks a lot.

How would you like
to make some money?

That's the stuff.

I've got a sure thing.

Double your money back
in two days.

Double my money?

Well, I need a little
investment capital to swing the deal.

Now, if you'll just
lend me a little cash...

You...

owing me two months rent.

And you want me
to lend you money?

Tomorrow you'll be sorry.

Your Highness?

Your Royal Highness?

Yes? What is it?

Dear Dr. Bonnachoven.

Oh, sure, yes.

Well, you're fine.
Much better.

Is there anything you want?

So many things.

Yes?
Well, tell the doctor.

Tell the good doctor everything.

I dreamt and I dreamt.

Yes?
Well, what did you dream?

I dreamt I was asleep
in the street...

and a young man came.

He was tall and strong...

and he was so mean to me.

He was?

It was wonderful.

Good morning.

Where's Dr. Bonnachoven?

I'm afraid I don't know anybody
by that name.

- Wasn't I talking to him just now?
- Afraid not.

Have I had an accident?

Quite safe for me to sit up?

Oh, perfectly.

Thank you.

Are these yours?

Did you lose something?

Would you be so kind
as to tell me...

where I am?

Well, this is what is
laughingly known as my apartment.

Did you bring me here by force?

Quite the contrary.

Have I been here all night...

alone?

If you don't count me, yes.

So I've spent the night here...

with you.

Well, now, I don't know
that I'd use those words exactly.

But...

from a certain angle...

yes.

How do you do?

How do you do?

- And you are?
- Bradley. Joe Bradley.

Delighted.

You don't know
how delighted I am to meet you.

You may sit down.

Thank you very much.

What's your name?

You may call me...

Anya.

Thank you... Anya.

- Would you like a cup of coffee?
- What time is it?

About 1:30.

1:30?

- I must get dressed and go.
- Why?

What's your hurry?
There's lots of time.

Oh, no, there isn't. And I've been
quite enough trouble to you as it is.

Trouble?

You're not
what I would call trouble.

I'm not?

I'll run a bath for you.

There you are.

Here we go now.

There you are.
That does it.

Give me a little slack,
will ya.

Irving! Why don't you answer the phone?
Look, this is Joe.

Can you get here
in five minutes?

Oh, no, I can't come now, Joe.
I'm busy.

Joe, I'm up to my ears in work.

Get into your next outfit, honey.
The canoe.

What kind of scoop?

I can't talk over the telephone.

One word in the wrong quarter, and
this whole thing might blow sky high.

It's front page stuff.
That's all I can tell you.

It might be political, it might be a
sensational scandal. I'm not sure which.

But it's a big story.
It's gotta have pictures.

But I can't come now.
I'm busy...

I'm busy now, and I'm meeting Francesca
at Rocca's in half an hour.

Don't understand.

There you are.

I was looking at
all the people out here.

It must be fun
to live in a place like this.

It has its moments.

I can give you a running commentary
on each apartment.

I must go.

- I only waited to say good-bye.
- Good-bye?

But we've only just met.

- How about breakfast?
- I'm sorry. I haven't time.

Must be a pretty important date
to run off without eating.

It is.

Well, I'll go along with you
wherever you are going.

That's all right, thank you.
I can find the place.

Thank you for letting me
sleep in your bed.

Oh, that's all right.

- Think nothing of it.
- It was very considerate of you.

You must've been awfully
uncomfortable on that couch.

No. Do it all the time.

Good-bye, Mr. Bradley.

Good-bye.

Go right through there,
down all the steps.

Well... small world.

Yes. I almost forgot.

Can you lend me some money?

Oh. Yeah.

That's right.
You didn't have any last night.

How much was it
that you wanted?

Well, I don't know how much I need.
How much have you got?

Suppose we split this 50-50.
Here's a thousand lira.

A thousand?

- You can spare all that?
- It's about a dollar and a half.

Oh.

Well, I'll arrange for it
to be sent back to you.

What is your address?

Via Margutta 51.

Via Margutta 51.

Joe Bradley.

Good-bye. Thank you.

Double my money, eh?

- Tell me how I double my money that way?
- Tomorrow. Tomorrow.

Yeah, tomorrow.

What wonderful hair you have.

Just cut, thank you.

Just cut?

Well, then...

cut so?

Higher.

Higher?

- Here?
- More.

- Here?
- Even more.

Where?

There.

There.

- Are you sure, miss?
- I'm quite sure, thank you.

All off?

All off.

Off.

- Are you sure?
- Yes.

Off!

Off!

Off.

Off!

That's a nice little camera
you have there. It's nice.

You don't mind
if I just borrow it, do you?

- Miss Weber!
- Just for a couple of minutes.

Let go. It's my camera.

You musician, maybe?

You artist?

Painter?

I know! You "modella"!

- Model, huh?
- Thank you.

It's perfect.

You be nice without long hair.

Now it's cool.

Yes. It's just what I wanted.

Now, why you not come
dancing tonight with me?

You should see. It's so nice.

It's on a boat on the "Tevere"...

Tiber. The river by Sant'Angelo.

Moonlight, music.

It's very, very... Very.

- Please? You come?
- I wish I could.

But... But your friend,
I not think they recognize you.

No, I don't think they will.

- Oh, thank you very much.
- Thank you.

After 9:00, I'll be there
dancing on river.

Remember Sant'Angelo.
All my friends...

If you come, you will be
most pretty of all girl.

Thank you.

- Good-bye.
- Good-bye.

- Gelato?
- Gelato.

Thank you.

A thousand lire.

No money.

I'm sorry.
I've really no money.

Look.

I'm sorry.

Well, it's you.

- Yes, Mr. Bradley.
- Or is it?

- Do you like it?
- Yeah. Very much.

So that was your
mysterious appointment.

- I have a confession to make.
- Confession?

Yes. I ran away last night...
from school.

Oh, what was the matter,
trouble with the teacher?

No, nothing like that.

You don't just run away
from school for nothing.

I only meant it to be
for an hour or two.

They gave me something last night
to make me sleep.

Oh, I see.

Now I'd better get a taxi
and go back.

Look, before you do...

why don't you take
a little time for yourself?

Maybe another hour.

Live dangerously.
Take the whole day.

I could do some of the things
I've always wanted to.

- Like what?
- Oh, you can't imagine.

I'd like to do just whatever I like
the whole day long.

You mean things like having
your hair cut, eating gelato?

Yes. I'd like to sit at a sidewalk cafe
and look in shop windows...

walk in the rain...

have fun and
maybe some excitement.

Doesn't seem much to you, does it?

It's great.

Tell you what. Why don't we
do all those things together?

- Don't you have to work?
- Work?

No. Today's gonna be a holiday.

You don't want to do
a lot of silly things.

Don't I? First wish,
one sidewalk cafe coming right up.

I know just the place.
Rocca's.

What will the people at school say
when they see your new haircut?

They'll have a fit.

What would they say if they knew
I'd spent the night in your room?

Well, I'll tell you what. You don't
tell your folks, and I won't tell mine.

- It's a pact.
- What would you like to drink?

Champagne, please.

Champagne?

Well, champagne "per la signorina"
and cold coffee for me.

Must be quite a life you have
in that school. Champagne for lunch.

- Only on special occasions.
- For instance?

The last time
was my father's anniversary.

- Wedding?
- No. It was the 40th anniversary of...

of the day he got his job.

40 years on the job.
What do you know about that?

What does he do?

Well, mostly you might call it
public relations.

Oh, well, that's hard work.

- Yes. I wouldn't care for it.
- Does he?

- I've heard him complain about it.
- Why doesn't he quit?

Well, people in that line of work
almost never do quit...

unless it's actually unhealthy
for them to continue.

Well, here's to his health, then.

You know,
that's what everybody says.

- It's all right?
- Yes, thank you.

What is your work?

Oh, I'm, uh,
in the selling game.

Really? How interesting.
What do you sell?

Fertilizer.

Chemicals. You know, chemicals.
Stuff like that.

Irving!
Well, am I glad to see you!

Why?
Did you forget your wallet?

- Pull up a chair. Sit down with us.
- So you're gonna introduce me?

Yes. This is a good friend of mine,
Irving Radovich. Anya, Irving.

Yes. This is a good friend of mine,
Irving Radovich. Anya, Irving.

- Anya...
- Smith.

- Hiya, Smitty.
- Charmed.

Hey, anybody ever tell you
you're a dead ringer for...

Well, I guess I'll be going.

Don't do anything like that, Irving.
Sit down. Join us. Join us.

Well, just till Francesca gets here.

Tell me, Mr. Radovich...

- what is a ringer?
- Waiter?

It's an American term,
and it means...

anyone who has
a great deal of charm.

Oh. Thank you.

You're welcome.

Cousins.

Mr. Bradley's just been telling me
all about his work.

- I'd like to have heard that.
- What do you do?

I'm in the same racket as Joe,
only I'm...

I'm awfully sorry, Irving.

- For the love of... What are you...
- I'm sorry, Irving.

I can take a hint.
I'll see you around.

- Your drink's here. Please sit down.
- Here's your drink. Take it easy.

I'm sorry about that.
Sit down. That's a good fellow.

That's a boy.

- You're twisting my arm, you know.
- Just be more careful not to spill.

Spill? Who's been doing
the spilling?

- You.
- Me?

Yeah.

Where did you find this loony?

You're okay.
Here's to you, huh?

Here's hoping for the best.

If it wasn't for that hair,
I'd swear that...

Thanks.

You slipped, Irving.
Slipped and almost hurt yourself.

I slipped?
I almost hurt myself?

- Joe, I didn't slip!
- You've got a bad sprain.

- Never mind I got a sprain.
- We'd better go and get it fixed up.

- Excuse us for a minute.
- Yes, of course. I'm so sorry.

Joe, now wait a minute.
What are you trying to do?

- Have you got your lighter?
- What's that got to do with it?

- Have you got it?
- Yeah, but what are you trying to do?

Listen. What would you do
for five grand?

Five grand?

She doesn't know
who I am or what I do.

Look, Irving, this is my story.
I dug it up. I gotta protect it.

She's really the...

Your tintypes are gonna make
this little epic twice as valuable.

- "The princess goes slumming."
- You're in for 25 % of the take.

- The take's five G's.
- Minimum. Hennessy shook hands on it.

- That's $1,500.
- It's 1,250.

- Okay. Now you shake.
- Okay, now lend me 30,000.

That's 50 bucks.
You gonna buy the crown jewels?

She's out there now drinking
champagne that I can't pay for.

We got to entertain her, don't we?

We can't go running around town
with a hot princess.

Do you want in on this deal
or don't you?

This I want back Saturday.

Now where's your lighter?
Let's go to work.

- Better now?
- Huh?

- Your ear.
- My ear?

Oh, yeah. Joe fixed it.

Would you care for a cigarette?

Yes, please.

You won't believe this,
but it's my very first.

Your very first?

No smoking in school, hmm?

Your first cigarette.

There. The gizmo works.

Well, what's the verdict?
Okay?

Nothing to it.

That's right. Nothing to it.

I'll stretch my legs a little here.

- I'll pick this one up, Irving.
- Yeah. You can afford it.

Well, what shall we do next?
Shall we make out a little schedule?

Oh, not that word, please.

Oh, I didn't mean a work...
school schedule.

I meant a fun schedule.

- Oh, yes. Let's just go.
- How about you, Irving? Are you ready?

- Yeah.
- Let's go.

This is...

- Smitty.
- She's a grand girl, Irving. Grand.

Five grand, Irving.

Where are you going now?

Honey, I got to work.
I'll call you tonight.

Look at those men!

They were supposed to be
inconspicuous.

You asked for plainclothes.

Stop! Come back!

- Let me take it.
- No. Let go. I can do it.

I'm going straight from now on.

American news service?
What did he mean?

Well, you say you're with the press,
you can get away with anything.

Go to church to get married
on a scooter. That's a hot one.

Joe's a wonderful liar.

Congratulations. Congratulations.

You don't have to look so worried.
I won't hold you to it.

Thank you very much.

You don't have to be too grateful.

Okay, I won't.

I'm a good liar, too, aren't I?

- The best I ever met.
- Uh-huh.

Thank you very much.

Say!

Come with me.

The mouth of truth. The legend is
that if you're given to lying...

and put your hand in there,
it'll be bitten off.

- Oh, what a horrid idea.
- Let's see you do it.

Let's see you do it.

Sure.

Hello.

You beast!
It was perfectly all right!

- I'm sorry. It's just a joke.
- Oh, you never hurt your hand.

- I'm sorry. You okay?
- Yes.

All right. Let's go.
Look out!

I'll park at the corner.

What do they mean,
all these inscriptions?

Well, each one represents
a wish fulfilled.

It all started during the war when
there was an air raid right out here.

A man with his four children
was caught in the street.

They ran over against the wall
right there for shelter...

and prayed for safety.

Bombs fell very close,
but no one was hurt.

Later on, the man came back and
he put up the first of these tablets.

Since then,
it's become sort of a shrine.

People come, and whenever
their wishes are granted...

they put up another one
of these little plaques.

Lovely story.

Read some of the inscriptions.

Make a wish?

Tell the doctor?

Anyway, the chances of it
being granted are very slight.

Well, what now?

I've heard of a wonderful place
for dancing on a boat.

- The barges down by Sant'Angelo.
- Yes. Couldn't we go there tonight?

- Why not?
- Anything you wish.

Then at midnight,
I'll turn into a pumpkin...

and drive away in my glass slipper.

And that'll be
the end of the fairy tale.

- Well, I guess Irving has to go now.
- I do?

That big business development of yours
that you have to attend to.

- Oh, the development.
- Can't afford not to take care of that.

Yeah. I'll see you later, Smitty.

- Good luck with the big development.
- Thanks.

Two, please.

Hello.

Hello.

Mr. Bradley, if you
don't mind my saying so...

- I think you are a ringer.
- A what?

Oh, thanks very much.

You've spent the whole day doing things
I've always wanted to. Why?

I don't know.
It seemed the thing to do.

I never heard of anybody so kind.

It wasn't any trouble.

Or so completely unselfish.

Let's have a drink at the bar.

There you are!
I look for you a long time.

I think maybe you not come.

Off! All off!

It's nice without, isn't it?
Cool.

- Oh, very, very good.
- This is Mr. Bradley.

I Mario Delani.

- Old friends?
- Yes. He cut my hair this afternoon.

He invited me here tonight.

Well, what did you say
the name was?

Delani. Mario Delani.

I'm very glad to know you.

Me too.

Oh, may I enjoy myself
the pleasure?

- Do you mind?
- No, no. Go right ahead.

Thank you.

- Did I miss anything?
- You're just in time, pal.

- Who's Smitty dancing with?
- Her barber.

Cut her hair this afternoon,
made a date for tonight.

The princess and the barber.

What is it?

August.

Thank you!

Bye.

Your Highness.

You'll dance quietly
towards the entrance.

- There is a car waiting.
- No.

- Your Highness, please.
- You've made a mistake.

Let me go. Will you let me go?

Mr. Bradley! Let me go!
Mr. Bradley!

Hit him again, Smitty!

- Joe, here are my car keys.
- Police, police. Come on.

The other side of the bridge.

- All right?
- Fine. How are you?

Oh, fine.

Say, you know,
you were great back there.

You weren't so bad yourself.

I...

I guess we better get Irving's car
and get out of here.

This is the American hour from Rome...

continuing our program
of musical selections.

- Everything ruined?
- No. They'll be dry in a minute.

Suits you.
You should always wear my clothes.

It seems I do.

I thought a little wine might be good.

- Shall I cook something?
- No kitchen. Nothing to cook.

- I always eat out.
- Do you like that?

- I always eat out.
- Do you like that?

Well, life isn't always
what one likes, is it?

No, it isn't.

- Tired?
- A little.

- You've had quite a day.
- A wonderful day.

This is the American hour from Rome
broadcasting a special news bulletin...

in English and Italian.

Tonight there is no further word from
the bedside of Princess Ann in Rome...

where she was taken ill yesterday on the
last leg of her European goodwill tour.

This has given rise to rumors
that her condition may be serious...

which is causing alarm and anxiety
among the people in her country.

- The news can wait till tomorrow.
- Yes.

May I have a little more wine?

I'm sorry I couldn't
cook us some dinner.

Did you learn how in school?

I'm a good cook.
I could earn my living at it.

I can sew, too,
and clean a house and iron.

I learned to do all those things.
I just haven't had the chance...

to do it for anyone.

Well, looks like I'll have to move...

and get myself
a place with a kitchen.

Yes.

I shall have to go now.

There's... something
that I want to tell you.

No, please.

Nothing.

I must go and get dressed.

Stop at the next corner, please.

Here?

Yes.

I have to leave you now.

I'm going to that corner there
and turn.

You must stay in the car
and drive away.

Promise not to watch me
go beyond the corner.

Just drive away and leave me...

as I leave you.

All right.

I don't know how to say good-bye.

I can't think of any words.

Don't try.

Your Royal Highness...

Twenty-four hours...
they can't all be blank.

They are not.

But what explanation
am I to offer Their Majesties?

I was indisposed.
I am better.

Ma'am, you must appreciate
that I have my duty to perform...

just as Your Royal Highness
has her duty.

Your Excellency,
I trust you will not find it necessary...

to use that word again.

Were I not completely aware of my duty
to my family and my country...

I would not have
come back tonight...

or, indeed, ever again.

And now...

since I understand we have
a very full schedule today...

you have my permission
to withdraw.

No milk and crackers.

That will be all, thank you,
Countess.

- Is it true? Did you really get it?
- Did I get what?

The princess story, the exclusive.
Did you get it?

- No, I didn't get it.
- What? But that's impossible.

- Have a cup of coffee or something?
- Joe, you can't hold out on me.

- Who's holding out on you?
- You are. I know too much.

First, you come into my office and ask
about an exclusive on the princess.

Next, you disappear. Then I get the rumor
from my contact at the embassy...

that the princess isn't sick at all
and she's out on the town.

What kind of newspaperman are you?
You believe every two-bit rumor?

Yeah, and a lot of other rumors about
a shindig on a barge down by the river...

and the arrest
of eight secret service men...

from a country
which shall be nameless.

And then comes the news
of the lady's miraculous recovery.

It all adds up.

And don't think by playing hard-to-get
you'll raise the price of that story.

A deal's a deal.
Now, come on, come on, come on.

- Where is that story?
- I have no story.

Then what was the idea of...

Man, wait till you see these!

Hiya, Mr. Hennessy.
You got here at the right time.

Wait'll you get a look...

What's the idea?

What do you mean charging
in here and spilling things?

- Who's spilling?
- You did!

I spoke to you about that once before,
don't you remember?

- Joe, look at my pants.
- Come in here and dry 'em off.

Aw, nuts to that.
Hey, did you tell him about Smitty?

Smitty?

Mr. Hennessy, wait till...

There you go again, Irving.

All right, save that till later.
You're here early anyway.

- Why don't you go home and... shave?
- Shave?

Or else keep quiet till Mr. Hennessy
and I are finished talking.

Hey, what kind of a routine is that?

What are you two guys up to?
Who's Smitty?

He's a guy that we met.
You wouldn't care for him.

- What am I supposed to look at?
- Just a couple of Irving's dames.

You wouldn't like 'em.

Maybe you would.

Don't change the subject. When you
came back into my office yesterday...

Yesterday I thought I had
a good lead, but I was wrong.

That's all there is to it.
There is no story.

She's holding the press interview today.
Same time, same place.

Maybe that's one story
you can get.

- And you owe me 500 bucks!
- Take it out of my salary.

- Fifty bucks a week.
- Don't think I won't.

Hey, what gives?
Have we had a better offer?

Irving, I don't know
just how to tell you this, but...

Wait till I sit down.

Well, in regard to the story
that goes with these...

- there is no story.
- Why not?

- There is no story.
- Why not?

I mean, not as far
as I'm concerned.

Hey, the pictures
came out pretty well.

You want to have
a look at 'em?

How about a blowup
from a negative that size, huh?

Oh, that's her first cigarette.

Oh, yeah.
Hey, the mouth of truth.

You want to know the caption
I had in mind there?

"Barber cuts in." Huh?

Here's the one I figured would be
the key shot for the whole layout...

- "The wall where wishes come true."
- Joe, that's good.

Lead off with that,
then follow up with the wishes.

I dug that up out of the file.
"Princess inspects police."

Yeah.

"Police inspects princess."

How about... Oh, wait.
I got a topper for you.

- Is that a shot?
- What a picture!

"Bodyguard gets body blow."

How about this?
"Crowned head."

Oh, I get it!
That's... Joe, you got...

She's fair game, Joe.

It's always open season
on princesses.

You must be
out of your mind.

Yeah, I know, but...

Look, I can't prevent you from
selling the pictures if you want to.

- You'll get a good price for 'em.
- Yeah!

You going to the interview?

- Are you going?
- Yeah. It's an assignment, isn't it?

Yeah.

I'll see you.

It ain't much,
but it's home.

Ladies and gentlemen,
please approach.

Her Royal Highness.

Your Royal Highness...

the ladies and gentlemen
of the press.

Ladies and gentlemen...

Her Royal Highness
will now answer your questions.

I believe at the outset,
Your Highness...

that I should express
the pleasure of all of us...

at your recovery
from the recent illness.

Thank you.

Does Your Highness believe
that federation...

would be a possible solution
to Europe's economic problems?

I am in favor of any measure...

which would lead to closer
cooperation in Europe.

And what, in the opinion
of Your Highness...

is the outlook for friendship
among nations?

I have every faith in it...

as I have faith
in relations between people.

May I say, speaking
for my own press service...

we believe that
Your Highness's faith...

will not be unjustified.

I am so glad to hear you say it.

Which of the cities visited
did Your Highness enjoy the most?

Each in its own way...

Each in its own way was...
unforgettable.

It would be difficult to...

Rome.
By all means, Rome.

I will cherish my visit here
in memory...

as long as I live.

Despite your indisposition,
Your Highness?

Despite that.

Photographs may now be taken.

Thank you,
ladies and gentlemen.

Thank you very much.

I would now like to meet some of
the ladies and gentlemen of the press.

Hitchcock, "Chicago Daily News".

I'm so happy to see you here.

Lampe. "New York Herald Tribune".

Good afternoon.

Irving Radovich,
CR Photo Service.

How do you do?

May I present Your Highness...

with some commemorative photos
of your visit to Rome?

Thank you so very much.

Joe Bradley,
American News Service.

So happy, Mr. Bradley.

Stephen House of
The London Exchange Telegraph.

Good afternoon.