Ride Along 2 (2016) - full transcript

Hey, be good.

Ladies, are we having a good time?

You know it.

Shayla, you know you're
my brown sugar Barbie.

Oh. And you're
my Asian daddy.

You're a naughty girl, Shayla.

Wait. I'll be right back.
Okay, mm tease me.

You ready?
Oh, my God.

Okay, just... Yes.

Yes. Yes.

Bounce the mouse, big daddy!
Bounce the mouse!



(CHUCKLING)
Beat me!

You are the nastiest
of all girls...

Damn it!

Hold that thought. I gotta go.
Okay, screenshot.

(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKING)

Looking good.

We call those "ladies."

But of course,
you wouldn't know that,

because you've never
been with one before.

Come on, man.

That old hackers-being-nerds
cliché, that's pretty dated now.

I do a'ight.

(GULPS)

Okay, the encoded cell phone
is nearly done.



And all I gots to do is slap
a little Bone Machine on it.

Stop talking.
Just get me a secure line.

And stop speaking
to me as if I care.

There you go.

(WHISPERS)
God, I hate you so much.

Eavesdropping here.

(CHUCKLING)

(CELL PHONE RINGING)

It's Griffin.

You owe me a million dollars
and a sincere apology.

Antonio. What are
you talking about?

Well, in the
language of bribes,

taking the money equals "I accept."

I see that you took the money,

so we have
an implied agreement.

The commissioner of ports
is a team player. Yay!

Then my shipment gets busted?

Come on. Ooh!

Your shipment was held up
because I didn't get the money.

I thought you called it off.

Point is, you had
a job to do.

I have a job to do
when I get my...

Ooh! Ooh! ls my guy there?
Tell him to wait.

Wait! He said wait.

Antonio, listen, please.

If I knew the deal
was still on, I would.

Put it on speaker, please.

(ON SPEAKER) There. Now I
feel like I'm participating.

Now,

go for it.

- (MUFFLED GUNSHOTS)
- (GASPS)

So, if he didn't
get the money,

find out who in my
organization stole from me,

and kill them.
Oh, Sh“.

Now, my little lovely,
where were we?

(SIRENS WAILING)

(LAUGHTER AND CHATTER)

I got my eye
on our man, Troy.

That's the biggest
M-CAT dealer

south of Knoxville,
right there.

We got 100K
in impound cash,

and a lieutenant
with real trust issues.

This could get interesting.

Ready, partner?

All day, every day.

Twice on Sundays.

All right, you stay
frosty out there, Mayfield.

I hear this guy
can be trigger happy.

Don't worry.
I got your back.

BEN: (ON EARPIECE)
I got your back, too, James.

Way before he had your back,
I had your back.

What part of "Stay off the goddamn
mic" don't you understand, Ben?

You're just a beat cop,
one month out the academy.

You're lucky I
let you shadow us.

Copy that.
Now shut up.

Hey, James, real quick,
just before I start shadowing,

I don't know about
this Mayfield guy.

I mean, he's big and all,
and that's fine

if we trying to
start a rap label.

But we're here
to be detectives,

and you know what you need to
be a detective? A big brain.

You know what,
I'm not convinced

that you got a big brain
inside that tiny head.

So say you.

It's a physiological
impossibility.

Oh, look who's breaking out the
double-point Scrabble words.

All right,
everybody just be quiet.

And, Ben, stay off
the goddamn radio.

These are them now, boss.

Got what we need?
Cash first.

(SCOFFS)
Must be a misunderstanding.

Look, we can
do this two ways,

our way or the hard way.

Which is our way anyway.

TROY: Now, since you
put it that way,

we got ourselves a deal.

Shit. It's a gun.
Zoom in.

(CHUCKLES)

Guys, I'm coming out there. I'm
coming out there right now.

Just sit tight.
That's James' orders.

You don't know
James like I do.

That's the look
of needing Ben.

He's shaking with terror!
Look at him!

That is my
partner out there!

You hear me?
I'm coming in hot!

Call it in.

Now, why you wanna
go and do that?

Just hand over that cash
and we got ourselves a deal.

Now, are you sure you wanna go this route?
Oh, I'm sure.

(CAR HORN PLAYING FANFARE)

The hell?

(ENGINE REVVING)

Shit.

One second.

- Oh, shit.
- (CAR RATTLING)

Come on, turn off.

God damn it. Stop!

(LAUGHS MOCKINGLY)

Did I interrupt something? Huh?

(MOUTHING)
What are you doing?

Did I break up your party?

Funny thing is,

I see all these muscle cars

but I don't see no muscle.

Boss, you want me to put
a slug in this one first?

Oh, is that supposed
to scare me?

Let me ask you a question. Would
you be scared if you knew this?

(GRUNTING) Kalaboom.
Kalaboom. Kinny.

(YELLS)

That's that Muay Thai
kicking back in.

Muscle memory.
Unconscious.

Are you eyeballing me?

You sneaking up on me?

Because this is all open.

Ha!

Kick move! Oh.

Is that yours?

(GUNSHOT)

(PEOPLE SCREAMING)

Mayfield!

(TYRES SCREECHING)

I got you, James!
Give me your gun.

I got him! Foot chase!

(IN SLOW MOTION)
Foot chase!

JAMES: Hey! Ben!

BEN: Everybody move!
Police!

(LAUGHS) Damn pig.

(TYRES SCREECHING)

Thanks for the ride.

(GRUNTING)

TROY: Hold on.

Shit!

I'm coming, James!

Oh, my God.

(TYRES SCREECHING)

Stop!

Ben, move!

You think I'm
playing games with you?

- (SCREAMS)
- JAMES: Move!

Oh, no, he didn't!

BEN: James! Watch out!

Watch out!

Oh, shit!

Oh!

(TROY SCREAMING)

(CAR ALARMS BLARING)

Oh, James.

What, did We kill him?

Just a little fender bender.

Little fender bender, my ass!

(TROY GROANING)

Get up!

That's for shooting my partner.

What you got here?

This looks like
more than just drugs.

JAMES: Mayfield is out for
weeks because of you,

and you bring him flowers?
It's a bad choice.

Well, I disagree.

I'm the only one that got
Mayfield something, James.

Because you the one
that got him shot!

Okay, well, listen. I went to the gift shop.
They had two choices.

He's not pregnant,
so I went with this.

I just thought it
was a better fit.

Just get rid of them.
Fine.

Hey, man, congratulations. Everybody
heard about what you did.

JAMES: All right.

What do you got?
What do you got?

Are you gonna head this one?

Go, go. Yeah.

What you got for me?

I tried to get into this,
and it fried my computer.

It's like it's got
acid for blood.

Aliens.
Mmm-hmm.

(CHUCKLES)

Go.

AMIR: I've never seen
a device locked this tight.

Someone encrypted this

to a level we can't crack.
Hackers.

Like, freelance hackers.

Which would make
a hacker a fracker.

Do you ever listen to the shit
that fly out your mouth?

No.

This is next-level hacking.

The only way we
got lucky is because

our guy has an ego
and he left his tag.

Who would do that?
This guy, out of Miami.

He look like a low
budget-ass Jackie Chan.

(CHUCKLING) That was a good one.
I know.

And get this,
his handle's Bone Machine.

All right,
let me talk to Brooks.

- You want me to come with you...
- JAMES: No.

So Troy's trying to become

the new kingpin of Atlanta,
and what do you do?

Lose a hundred grand
of the city's money,

wind up completely destroying
a parking structure,

you get your
partner shot? Nice.

Well, in his defense, Mayfield
wasn't his true partner.

The grown-ups
are speaking, Ben.

You need to get me
something on this guy.

I've got three,
maybe four days

before I have to let him go.

Look, I found a guy in Miami

that encrypted
Troy's flash drive.

I think he can lead me
to Troy's supplier.

I need to go down there
and scoop this dude up.

Two days, tops.
Milk run.

Good. So get a team
together and fix this.

(CLEARS THROAT)

What was that?
Something went in there.

Did it get you too, or no?
(CONTINUES CLEARING THROAT)

Pollen or something.
I don't know what it is.

I'm free, though.

So if you guys wanna put
that team together...

BROOKS: But you're not
a detective, Ben.

You're barely even
a probationary officer.

And after this mess, you're
about an inch from being fired.

Okay, listen. Sir, you
can't teach what I have.

I'm like a cat.
Hmm?

I'm like half cop, half puma,
but I'm all detective.

Like, I'll get in your ass.
(HISSING)

You know what?

The Psych department wants me
to take less responsibility.

So, James,
Mr. Barber here

is still technically in
his work placement,

so if you wanna take
him to Miami, you can.

But if he screws up,
in any way, it's on you.

(WHISPERS) Come on.

No.

Everybody's busy.

I'll fly solo.
All right.

What was that, man?

You're supposed to have my
back back there, James.

We family.
Family's not supposed

to be letting shit
go down like that.

Stop. Stop.
It's not about family.

It's not about friends.
It's not about feelings.

It's about you not knowing
how serious this work is.

I know how serious
this work is.

That's why I know
I need to be on the team.

No, you don't.
You're just a rookie.

You got lucky on your first
little police case, man.

That was the worst thing
to ever happen to you.

Turned you into a monster.

Now, you think you're
ready, but you're not.

James, I am ready, man!

That's why you need
to take me with you,

so I can prove it to you,
Lieutenant, and everybody else.

Whoa! You don't gotta prove nothing to me.
You almost got us killed.

Don't let one
incident define me.

You're really trying to say
that with a straight face?

Do you wanna be responsible
for ruining my career?

I don't care!
And you shouldn't either.

You're getting
married in a week.

You should stay here and help
Angela with the wedding.

James, you said
it's a milk run.

Two days, tops.
Those are your words.

I can't go back to
marry Angela as no scrub.

You told me to prove myself,

that's what I'm trying to do!
Let me do it!

Nope. You don't listen.

James, what I'm...
Listen!

(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)

It's bullshit, James.

Not taking me to Miami.

That's ridiculous, man.

I am ready to be a detective.

I'm 100% ready
to be a detective.

ASSFACE23: (ON SPEAKER)
What's up, Black Hammer?

BEN: Move, Assface.
I'm not in the mood right now.

Y'all done made me mad.

I'mma show Lieutenant Brooks.
Show all y'all.

People, get out of my way!

Right now,
I'm getting in my zone.

I don't care.
You wanna chase me?

I'mma show you what happens
when you chase me.

That's what happen
when you make Ben mad.

Spin out.

Oh!

And take it out.

Yeah, I see a car I want.
Get out the car, Grandma.

You need some help?

Get your Bengay-using ass
out the car!

Get your old ass
on that ground.

This ain't a game to me.

I just want the car. I don't want you.
(GRUNTING)

Where'd she get the bat from?

Grandma! Hey, hey...

- (GRUNTING)
- BEN: Oh. Oh!

Oh! Oh!

Oh, Grandma playing dirty.

We turning it up now.

What she doing? She just
pulled a gun out her ass!

Grandma, it ain't even
got to go here.

Oh! I just got shot
by a grandma!

- AUTOMATED VOICE: Game over.
- (CHUCKLES)

ANGELA: That is why I hired you, Cori.
You're the best.

CORI: I know.

CORI: We have
12 tables over here.

If we put flower
arrangements at about half,

and then we can do a vase
with crystal around it.

ANGELA: (GASPS)
I love it. Cori?

Ben.

I didn't know we were
having a meeting today.

I didn't get that memo.

We just thought
we could do some

last-minute wedding
details, that's all.

Oh.

Without me?

Huh.

- If that's the case, then I'll just...
- (CLICKS TONGUE)

Listen from afar.

- Thank you,Ben.
- BEN: Yep

I am so excited to tell you,

my associate has the best

hydrangea connection
in all of Atlanta.

BENZ: No.

Now, for the
final seating chart,

I've decided to move
everyone to Table Five,

because I don't want anything
overshadowing your wedding.

Perfect. Table Five,
that's the perfect table.

No, we can't sit
them right there.

We can't do that?
Why?

We can't put my uncle and
Carol at the same table.

They used to be
on that stuff together.

You want all these people
Electric Sliding all night?

That's what'll happen.

Fine. I'll move him.

Angela, no! You're
not moving anyone.

Ben.

You've had
your opportunities.

And you've
ignored them all, Cori.

Let me ask
you a question.

Have you looked at my Dreamboard
that I posted online?

Looked at my color wheel?
My glam shots?

Why am I doing this?
Why am I going back and forth with you?

This is my wedding!

Okay. And I got
a vision for my wedding.

A magnificent vision that
will not be ignored by you.

She's not ignoring.

No. Baby, she is ignoring it.
She hasn't addressed it.

Excuse me?
Cori.

Who are you walking
up on, all swelling up?

Do you know the level
of who you're dealing with?

I'm a First Ballot Hall of Famer.
(SCOFFS)

I crap out high-end clients.

That's a little too much
information for me.

CORI: And they
keep coming back.

Why? Because I have taste.

I'm not gonna do
this with you. No.

Reason why is because I'm not...
What are you doing?

Baby...
Baby, just help me up.

I'm not intimidated
by you.

I'm a cop.
Real badge. Authentic.

What you gonna
do is respect it.

Also respect the fact
that you are my employee!

Your employee?
That's right.

Don't you step...
Look,cop.

What you need to do, is you
need to step the hell back

and let me create
the wedding of your dreams!

What I'm gonna do
is step up!

No!
I'm sick of this shit!

(SCREAMS)

Ben...

(BEN GROANING)

So, I guess we'll go
with my vision now.

Get out of my house, Cori!

ANGELA: Look, just let Cori do her
job, which is to plan the wedding.

Cori's job should be
to show a little respect.

I specifically told Cori,
I said, "No hydrangeas."

And what does she show up here with?
Hydrangeas!

I keep forgetting
that you're the bride.

Why does nobody want
to show me respect!

That's what
I wanna know, Ang.

Oh, I respect you.

Well, obviously not,
because we're sitting here

talking about my passion and...

Wow!

I respect that.

I do.

A lot.

Practice run for
the wedding night?

Yeah. I mean, we're here.

I'm taking you into custody.

And we're going downtown.

Well, I like that.

Because of the play on words.
Uh-huh.

Yeah. What are you...

What is that?
What you trying to do?

No, stop. Don't do that.

No, no. Stop that. Stop.

You have the right
to stay silent...

You have the right
to "remain" silent...

You have the right to remain silent.
Anything...

Let me stop you right here, babe.
Just for a second.

Because I want
you to Mirandize me.

I want you to Mirandize
the hell out of me.

But first, what I need to do,
I need to go in that bathroom,

and wash all this
Atlanta crime off my butt.

Now, when I'm done, I'mma come out
clean and give myself to the law.

Take me.
Handcuff me to the bed.

Mmm-hmm.
All right.

Babe, put that baton down

because if you break it,
I'mma have to pay for it.

Whoo. What is going on
in my stomach?

I gotta get in the bathroom.
(SIGHS)

Okay.

Hey, sis.
Everything okay?

I need you to do something
for me, for the wedding.

Look, if this is about me
not bringing a date...

That's not what I'm
calling you about.

I was wondering, did you get
me a gift for the wedding yet?

Sound like you want a favor.

- (BEN GRUNTS)
- (SIGHS)

Ben really wants
to go to Miami.

He told me you
wouldn't take him.

Oh, hell, no. Are you crazy?
James,

it would mean
so much to him.

I don't care what
it'd mean to him.

Look, is this about him,

or is this about
you getting him

out of your hair
for a few days?

BEN: Ang!

A little bit of both.

No can do, sis.

Look, you get
the dwarf a sedative.

He's not going with me.
This is way too important.

But, James, he just wants to prove himself.
The answer is no.

- (CALL DISCONNECTS)
- Uh... Hello?

(CHUCKLES) This girl crazy.

Now, why would you want me to
take this little flea to Miami?

To show what kind
of a idiot he...

(DOOR BELL RINGING)

Baby?

- Baby?
- Yeah?

The door.
Someone's at the door.

All right.
They'll go away, Ang.

(RINGING CONTINUES)
No, they're not. They're not going away.

(SIGHS)

I learned my lesson.
I didn't break in.

I see that, James.

At least, not this time.

What are you wearing?

Talking about
"what am I wearing?"

It's called a kimono, James.
They make them for men.

That's your problem. You need
to expand your horizons.

All right, well, just please

don't bring this bullshit
to Miami with us.

Well, I won't bring...

Wait a minute, hold on.

"Miami," James? I'm going?

You taking me to Miami?
I'm leaving in five minutes.

If you're going,
you better hurry up.

Come here, man.

All right.
No. It's too soon.

Baby steps.
I'm okay with that.

I knew you were
gonna change your mind.

Because when
we were talking,

you looked at me,
you were like...

And I was like, "He's thinking about
it." You were mulling it over.

God damn, I'm pumped up.

Oh!

Okay, this is
a little awkward, babe.

Uh...

James wants me to go away
with him for a couple days

on official police business.

(WHISPERING)
I don't wanna go.

I don't.
But James needs me.

- ANGELA: Okay, yeah.
- BEN: Okay?

Baby, do what you need to do.
Really?

Yeah. Just make sure
you're back in time

to make me Mrs. Black Hammer.

What? Yes! Stop it. Of course!
I can't wait to get back.

Because, as soon as I
get here, you and I,

we are gonna marry
the hell out of each other.

We're gonna marry our asses off.
(CHUCKLING) Okay.

Okay? Okay?
Give me three.

(HISSING NOISILY)

I love you. I love you.
All right. You!

Hey, what can I say? You just...
Miami! Oh.

Hurry up!
I'm hurrying.

Don't think I'm not grateful.
Mmm-hmm.

But why did you
change your mind?

Ben is never
gonna make Detective.

And everybody on
the force knows this.

But he thinks if he makes
this Miami run with me,

that he'll prove us all wrong.

So, I'm taking him,
so he can see for himself.

Because I don't wanna hear him
complaining for the rest of my life

that I never
gave him a chance.

You never know, he may surprise you.
I doubt it.

He's done it before.
Beginner's luck.

Oh. Okay.

You'll be careful, right?

Don't worry.

I'll have your
little man-child

back here safe and sound.

Oh, he's all man.

- BEN: Hey, Ang?
- Yeah, babe?

BEN: You know
where my thong is?

The silver, or the gold?

BEN: I'm looking
for the silver one.

Check my top-right drawer.
Wow.

Don't mix up our thongs again, please.
I'm out.

BEN: Oh, I got them. They were
in my panty drawer, not yours.

- Thank you.
- ANGELA: You're welcome!

Whoo! James!

Look at this, man!

James, do you see this?

This is Miami!
This is the 305!

Remember,
this ain't no vacation.

First thing we gonna do
is go by Miami PD.

Let them know we here.
Okay.

You can't just slide
into somebody's backyard,

start doing police work without
letting them know you in town.

If that's the case, then we gotta
stop somewhere, so I can change.

Why? What's the reason?

This is just wrong.

If linen is wrong, then I
don't wanna be right, James.

You look like
you're in a damn cult.

Does Tommy Bahama run a cult?

If so,good,
and where can I sign up?

James, let me
tell you something.

If we're gonna be a team, you
gotta start to coordinate.

Listen to me, James!

We gotta complement
each other, all right?

I'm not trying to
compliment no marshmallow.

A good detective knows how
to blend in with the locals,

so his prey never
sees him coming.

Oh, yeah,
you blending, all right.

James, let me
tell you something,

the right gust of
wind hit this thing,

I'm giving you '90s P. Diddy.
Look at this, James.

All right.
Wait here.

Why I gotta wait here?

Why you gotta talk?

Detective,
I'm asking nicely.

Please, I need a suspect.

You're the Atlanta fella.

Captain Pedro Hernandez.
Honored to meet you.

Detective James Payton.

We just wanted to
give you a heads-up.

We're gonna be working
in your jurisdiction,

questioning
a possible witness.

HERNANDEZ:
Thanks for the heads-up.

(TYPING)

BEN: What? Hydrangeas?

Ugh.

(MEN LAUGHING AND APPLAUDING)

What's up with this?

It's the Antonio Pope
Foundation's annual fundraiser.

That's Antonio himself.

He's a big donor.

He owns one of the largest shipping
companies on the East Coast.

Oh! What is your problem?

You're at my desk.

I'm sorry. I was looking at
some floral arrangements.

Well, don't. Don't touch my computer.
Don't look at my computer.

This stuff is sensitive.

That is fine. I'll log out.
Oh, you're gonna log out?

Oh! Girl...

I said, don't touch!
Oh!

(GROANS)

it hurts, I know.
(GRUNTING) James? Oh!

Soft-tissue manipulation.

- Pressure points.
- (CONTINUES GRUNTING)

Come on, Ben, you should be
able to get out of that.

She got my appendix, James.
She locked this whole side up.

Can he get out of this?
(GROANING) Ooh!

(GRUNTING)
I don't know about that one.

Whoa! Come on, Ben.
You're embarrassing me.

- Man up.
- MAYA: Yeah, you're embarrassing him.

I tap out! I tap out!
You're pathetic.

Detective Payton, Atlanta Vice.

Down here a couple
of days on assignment.

Oh, my hat!
Detective Cruz. Homicide.

And I'm Officer Ben Barber,
and I am his partner.

No, he's not.

I'm not shaking
your hand after that.

- (OBJECTS CLATTERING)
- Come on, James. Let's go.

Before I have to bust her ass.
Let's go.

Come on, James.
'Cause she's too much.

I don't know
what her problem is.

James, it's really cool
that you needed me

to come down here and all, man.

But I feel bad,

because I know you had to
cancel all your plans.

What plans?

My bachelor party.

I didn't have nothing planned.

Yeah, right.
Boy, if you don't stop...

Seriously, you didn't
have anything? Nothing?

James, I'm not even
into that. Strippers and...

I'm not trying to come home to the
Lady Hammer with glitter all on me.

I'm not... Come on.

Mmm-hmm.
Hey, on a more serious note,

Angela need to know who you're
bringing to the wedding, James.

Either Nicki Minaj or Patti LaBelle.

You know what you're doing?
You're road-blocking.

That's what you're doing, man.
You're road-blocking.

You're still
holding onto something.

I know what it is.

You're afraid that when me and
Angela go sail off into the sunset,

that you're
gonna be by yourself.

But here's the thing, James.

You can sail off into the
sunset with me and Angela.

After the honeymoon, though.

You can't go there. 'Cause that's
when me and Angela gets busy.

If you say that one more time,
I'mma shoot you in the face.

Again, it doesn't bother me.

You know why, James?
Because it's just banter.

Is that right?

It's a trademark of all great
partnerships, to be honest with you.

No, no. It's a trademark
of the brothers-in-law.

Uh-oh!

Guess who just showed up?

The brothers-in-law.

Look, look, look, man.
That ain't gonna fly.

One more, one more.

Everybody settle down! Because the
brothers-in-law just got to town.

You say that again, and I'mma
shoot you in the face, too.

Say...

You...

All right, fine.

(CELL PHONE VIBRATING)

Oh, you funny.

It's gonna stick.

All right.

How you wanna handle
this whole thing with AJ?

Wanna do Good Cop-Bad Cop?
Prisoner's Dilemma?

Why don't you leave that
by-the-book shit at the academy?

We're gonna assess the situation
and play it on instincts.

My instincts.
With all due respect,

I really feel like we should
do the Reid technique.

Okay? I done studied it.

Why don't we try the "Ben, shut the
hell up" technique, all right?

- Let's run that all day.
- (POUNDING ON DOOR)

AJ. open up!

I'm gonna go check
around the window.

(DOOR RATTLING)

Hey! Police!
Stop! You better stop!

James! He running!

That's a foot chase!
Don't say foot...

It's a foot chase!
It's a foot chase, James!

Stop right there!

You ain't gotta
say "Foot chase!"

Hey! Stop!

- Relax!
- (THUDS)

BEN: James! I'm okay!

What'd I say?

Police! Stop!

Slow down!

Police, stop!

Hey! Stop! Stop! Stop!

Police!

Goddamn rookie.

(CAR ALARM CHIRPS)

AJ: Enjoy your barbecue!

Get down! I see you! Stop!

(BEN GRUNTS)

God.

BEN: Police, stop!

That's it!
I'mma shoot you!

AJ! AJ! Don't you jump...

(EXCLAIMING)

Damn it! AJ!

(GRUNTING)

Oh! I got you,AJ!

God damn it, I missed.

You'll be okay.
It doesn't look that bad!

AJ, get your ass... AJ!

AJ!

(YELLS AND GRUNTS)

Get your little...
Get in the back room!

Stop! Stop! Stop!

Stop! Stop!

- (BARKING)
- Oh, shit!

Heel! Heel!

Police!

(WHISTLING)
Stop it! God damn it!

- Shit! God damn. Shit!
- (ROOSTERS CLUCKING)

Get out of here! Get out!

(SCREAMING)

- (BRAKES SCREECH)
- (GRUNTS)

Oh,AJ.

You okay, man?

Damn, I didn't see you.

It's all right,
this is my friend.

We just playing, like...
He's okay.

We just playing.

What's up, Bone Machine?
What the hell you running from?

What the hell, man?
Why you chasing me?

Why you running
from the police?

I didn't know you were police!

You didn't hear us say
"Stop. We the police"?

Hey. I didn't see a badge.

All I saw was two
mean-looking blaentlemen.

"Blentlemen?"

That ain't even a word, AJ.
What you trying to say, man?

Just forget about it.
Say what you mean.

Have some balls! Say it!

Okay. Black.

You ran from us
just because we black?

Look at you.

You would run
from you. Okay?

Look, all we wanna do
is talk to you, AJ.

You, and your son over there,

should be ashamed of yourselves

for trying to intimidate me!

BEN: You can't
hear me calling you?

Got me running
after you in flats?

JAMES: Ben?
What are you doing?

He got me running through alleyways!
People's houses!

Chasing you through chicken
coops and dogs and shit!

In flats, James!

Look at my outfit. I can't
get another one of these.

Where's my hat at?
Hey! Hey! Hey!

Come here. Stay focused.
Stay focused! A'ight.

JAMES: Let me show you how a
real detective handles this.

Damn.

AJ.

Look, man, all we trying to do

is have a little conversation

about your boy,
Troy, in Atlanta.

Troy who?

You just encrypted
a drive for Troy.

"Troy?" it doesn't ring a bell.
I don't know any Troy.

It don't ring a bell?
No, it does not.

I'm taking your ass to jail.
Come on, man!

Until you let me know what's on
that little secret drive of Troy's,

your ass is locked up.

Hey, my word is my rep.
And this is oppression.

Get your ass in there.
(GRUNTS)

Why you looking
so nervous, AJ?

Why your legs so twitchy?

Got restless leg syndrome.

Your legs won't rest
when you get to jail.

As a matter of fact,
they gonna be working overtime

to keep them
"blentlemen" off your back.

Last thing they're gonna do
with your ass is be "blentle."

That's the last thing they gonna do.
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!

I am not a criminal, and you know that!
This is not fair!

It's not fair? Well, welcome
to the real world, AJ.

I'm sorry, but it's not fair here.
You know why?

It's a world where your
feelings can get hurt.

It's a world where
a guy can get married

and not be thrown
a bachelor party.

That's the world we...
You getting married?

Yes. Thank you.
Congratulations.

This guy here is about
to be my brother, in law.

My brother-in-law.
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!

Your partner is
marrying your sister?

JAMES: He's not my partner.

That's gotta be weird.

It's not weird at all.
It's actually magical.

Brings us closer together.

- Ben.
- BEN: What?

Stay focused.

What makes you think
I'm not focused?

AJ: Let me ask you a question.

Go ahead.

- Your girl. His sister.
- BEN: Yeah.

AJ: Is she hefty?

I hope she's not a twin,
all bearded and grumpy.

Oh. Oh, no,
they don't look alike.

AJ: My whole point is,

your partner marrying your sister
has got to be tough on you.

The sex part.
Think about it.

Your partner, boning...

No, we don't bone. We don't...
...your sister.

Don't... That's not...

No.
Mmm.

AJ, you better cool out.
(HIGH-PITCHED) Me so horny.

(BRAKES SCREECHING)

Jeez!

- BEN: Been there.
- AJ: I think you broke my nose.

That's a lawsuit right there!

You just made me
a very rich man!

Can't spend no
money in the pen.

No.
Or dead.

What's it gonna be?
Okay, okay.

I may have a master code key

for emergencies.
You "may"?

Okay, I do have one,

but it's too dangerous
to keep on me.

I keep it in my man
Stevie B's safe.

Where's the safe?

It's at the club he owns.

Tell you what,
I get that for you,

you can crack Troy's computer,
and we're good.

What do you think?
Sound like a plan to me, James.

(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)

Have you been watching this?
What?

Since we walked in, everybody
he walk by, handshake or hug.

Hey,Candi!
Hi, sweetie.

- How are you?
- Fine.

- Usual table?
- Mmm-hmm.

And, please, tell the guys that
midnight is coming early tonight.

Yes, sir.
All right.

(CROWD WHOOPING)

(CHUCKLES)
Oh, I know that look.

"How come the nerd is
with all the hotties?"

Well, anyway, Stevie B's gonna
be here in an hour, tops.

And you said you didn't
get a bachelor party.

And we are in
a club with ladies.

And we are on official
police business, so...

You want to look like cops?
Think about it.

- Maybe scare my guy off?
- BEN: Now, listen,

James, I hate to agree with
AJ, but he's got a point.

Loosen up a little bit.

Yeah! Hoo!

Hey, where you going?

I'mma get some
drinks, man. Chillax.

BEN: What is your problem?

If he wanna go and get us
a couple of drinks, let him!

He is working you like a rookie.

And if you lose him,
it's your fault.

Stop it. You don't
think I know that?

Here's the play, James.

We sit here until
his friend gets here.

We act as if this is a bachelor party.
Let him get loose,

get the information we need,
and then we leave.

Key word is "act!"
That's what you're doing?

I'm acting!

It's my bachelor party!

(ALL CHEERING)

(CLUB MUSIC PLAYING)

(ALL CHEERING)

I got him!
I got him!

One more time!

CROWD: One more time!
One more time!

Oh!

Oh, wait a minute.

What's happening,
Black Hammer?

Assface!

- Hey!
- What?

What are you doing?
I'm Skyping in

the rest of
the bachelor party, James!

Get off the table!

(WHISPERS) I'm acting.

Ben, I want you to
meet my new lady friends.

They love to get
loose and party,

but they are not prostitutes.

It's his bachelor party.

Let it rip.

No, that's too much, ladies.

Hands off.

Hey, Ben, take
a photo for me.

BEN: Okay. One, two...

I can't breathe no more.
I can't breathe no more.

- (CAMERA CLICKING)
- I got it.

Go ahead.

Ang is such a strong woman.

And I don't wanna give her
anything that's girly or ratchet.

Nobody's information is safe,
unless AJ makes it safe.

JAMES: AJ.
Hey.

Where is Stevie B?
We need to find him!

AJ: You're ruining
my clothes.

JAMES: I'm sick of
waiting on you.

We gotta toast
the groom. Toast!

ALL: (CHANTING)
Toast! Toast!

Toast! Toast! Toast!

I mean, would it kill you to
say something nice about me?

- You want a toast?
- Yes!

All right, give me my water.

Here!

I've never gotten him to do
anything like this.

Come on.
Let's hear it!

To my brother-in-law, Benjamin Barber.
That's me.

He's 5'4".

Uh... Gonna marry my sister.

Just graduated
from the academy.

You're not doing anything,
but stating facts.

Give me something
from the heart!

JAMES: That's all I got.

We ain't even here for this!

Guys, do you know
what time it is?

MAN: (ON SPEAKER) It's midnight!
Midnight!

Bachelor party!

What?
He's gone!

AJ: Excuse me, ladies!

Shit!

I'll give the money back!
I swear!

WOMAN: Ow!

- MAN: Easy, dude!
- (GUN COCKING)

(WHIMPERING)
Gun!

(ALL SCREAMING)

Freeze!

(GUNSHOT)

Everybody down!

Down! Get down!

BEN: Get up, AJ!
Get your ass up!

James, why is it that every
time I go to a club with you,

I gotta get into
some kind of trouble?

It's probably that jacket.

He's shooting a FN 5.7, James!
That gun is serious!

I'mma push him back.
Don't go now.

JAMES: Too many people!

Told you not to go!

Thirteen, 14.

What are you counting?
He's out!

BEN: Everybody, stay down!

Stay down!

AJ.

What?

He's gone.

Hey.

There was no "code key"
in the damn safe.

AJ played us.

You Okay?

No. No, lam not.

Let me ask you
a serious question.

Maybe you not
cut out for this.

That's not a question.
That's a statement.

You know what? You was having such a
good time at your bachelor party,

you wasn't even ready.

Okay, James,
first of all,

don't act like I wanted
to go to this club,

and stand on tables, and party
with a bunch of hot women.

That didn't come out right.
So, I'm gonna start over.

(SIREN BLARING)

Oh, my God.

Detective by day, hottie by night.
What the hell's going on?

Well, I'll tell you what's not
going on, a Pilates class.

I dunno what you're dressed
for, but it's stupid.

What happened?

One shooter. Obviously a professional.
Went right after AJ.

Who the hell is AJ?

AJ's the hacker that we
came out here to question.

Now, your guys think
it's gang related.

I say that's bullshit.

Because you're
an expert on local gangs?

No, I'm an expert
on bullshit.

Well, expert,
how'd he get the gun in?

Gun was ceramic.

Or plastic. I saw it.
It was a FN 5.7.

It's undetectable. It's a downloadable
super pack in my video game.

Let me tell you something, you get
that pack, game over! Okay...

That's how he got the gun in.

The case I'm
working on right now,

shooter got a gun
inside of a secured area.

And get this,

the threads on the bullet matched
the casings of an FN 5.7.

Same M.O. Could be
the same shooter.

Who was shot?
Port Commissioner.

Could be connected.
Could be connected.

Ugh. It's like
watching rams mate.

Why would somebody hire
a professional hitman

to take out a computer guy

for a mid-level Atlanta dealer?

Because he's annoying.

If that was the case, you'd
be dead a long time ago.

I'm just spit-balling.

Fact is, he wouldn't.

So, the guy who hit
the Port Commissioner

is the same guy who
tried to hit your hacker.

Maybe he's involved
with something bigger.

You know what?

She should be your
"plus one" for the wedding.

You know what?
You should get in the car.

I need to get somebody for you.
You need to get in the car.

You wanna just have an empty plate there...
I'm getting in the car.

I'm not gonna keep doing this with you.
There's so much disrespect.

I mean, what's
funny to me, James...

The plastic gun, I detected that.

But you don't say nothing
about that, do you?

A professional hitter
on a hacker?

Club full of witnesses?

BEN: And I'm driving.
No, you're not.

Uh, I'm in
the driver's seat, James,

which means I'm driving.

- (ENGINE SPUTTERS)
- Give me my keys.

Why's your car
smell like burnt toast?

Because this stinks.
(SNIFFING)

That's not toast.

Ben, get the hell
out of the car.

BEN: Get off my neck!
Get off me!

(BEEPS)

You guys okay?

Do you have any idea what
your insurance is gonna be?

That's the second car
you done got blown up!

It's gonna go
through the roof!

REPORTER: Police are no
closer to a suspect

in the shocking murder of Port
Commissioner Douglas Griffin.

And, although
the investigation continues,

the city has wasted
no time in appointing

Charles Nunez as his successor.

I will carry on my
predecessor's mission

to eradicate corruption
and clean up the port,

no matter the cost!

No sign of him at the house.

He's not going back to the house.
He's a wanted man.

Look, whoever's after AJ,
really needs to get to him.

Even if that means
killing you guys to do it.

Guys, guys, guys.

I'm a little disappointed.

Since you've been here I've had
a night club shooting downtown,

- I've fielded about
- (CELL PHONE RINGING)

20 trespassing complaints
in Little Havana

and a freaking car blew up.

Hey, we didn't
plant the car bomb.

Yeah, but we did
the other stuff, James.

HERNANDEZ: Listen, I spoke
to your lieutenant in Atlanta,

and he'd love it
if you went home.

Happy travels, guys.

- Happy travels, my ass. We ain't going nowhere.
- (CELL PHONE RINGING)

Answer that phone.
It's not my phone.

It's in your pocket.
Ain't no phone in...

There is a phone
in my pocket.

It's AJ's phone.

I never gave AJ
back his phone.

Look, the phone's being going
off the last couple of hours.

I mean, there's texts in here
from Tasha, Bree, Colette...

First of all, AJ is a slore.

Why don't we do this?
I'mma call Tasha right now.

No, that's gonna raise a red flag.
See if she got a work number.

"Tasha, work." That's good
thinking, James. I know.

Well, I'm just telling you.
You don't got to tell me.

I should, you did a good...
Just call.

You know what your
problem is, Maya?

You think you're cute,
but you're not.

You're ugly.

And you got man hands.

(LINE RINGING)

WOMAN: (ON PHONE) Beach Kitten
of South Beach, open seven days a week...

Blam-a-lam-bam!

Guess we're going to Tasha's job.

I took this from your car.

I'm gonna go see
my explosives guy.

Maybe he can tell us
what kind of ordinance it was.

Damn, that's what left
of your trunk, James.

They got you good.
Yeah, we're gonna need a new ride.

Oh. I can
help you with that.

BEN: Oh, I gotta tell Angela.

JAMES: Man, don't tell her what we driving.
I feel like a dope dealer.

BEN: Stop it. This is the best
car from the impound lot.

- (CELL PHONE RINGING)
- BENZ: Hello?

- Hey, baby.
- Hey.

- Guess what I call me and James?
- What?

Don't.
The brothers-in-law!

(CHUCKLING) I love it. Man,
don't say that no more.

So, Ben, I don't
have to worry about

not seeing you
on Saturday, right?

Babe, I'll be home,
waiting for the wedding.

You're finishing things up?

I just got a lead,

so we're about to crack
this thing wide open.

Well, you do that

and everything's all right, here.
We've got it all covered.

"We?" Ang, is Cori over there?

Is that Ben?
Let me talk to him.

- No, don't put her...
- CORI: Ben, hi!

What kind of man leaves town
a week before the wedding?

A detective man!
You're not a detective.

I'm not gonna shout
with you right now.

You know what
you're gonna do?

You're gonna respect
my choices, Cori.

You gotta earn
respect from me.

I don't understand why you
gotta keep going off-menu.

Because your menu
is dog shit!

Menu is not dog...
Yes, it is, Ben.

That's why I put my dreambook
on Pinterest for you.

So you can look at it...
Pinterest this! Goodbye.

Cori?

Cori?

I can't believe she
just hung up on me.

You know your biggest problem?
Here we go.

You don't know
how to stay focused.

I'm going through
a little crisis

and it'd be real nice to get a
little support from my brother.

You ain't got no brother.

Okay, what do you call the guy that's
about to marry your sister, James?

Not my brother.
Hey.

That would be incest,
and that would be nasty.

You're twisting stuff.

You twist things because you don't
have the ability to love, James.

That's your problem.

I'll prove it to you right now.
Let me take the lead.

I'll show you I could be a detective.
Hell, no.

Tell me why.

This girl's probably not even
gonna wanna talk to us in public,

so it's not gonna be a good
look if you get all screechy,

or you accidentally
shoot the girl.

Why can't you let
the past be the past?

You can't even handle Cori!

She's irrelevant right now.

The girl is the devil's
spawn with lady parts.

Look, I'm taking the lead
because I'm the detective.

Fine.

It's like I'm
dealing with a child.

BEN: Oh, my God.

- James, do you see this?
- Yep.

BEN: It's like
a Costco for supermodels.

Look at this.

James? Look up!
She's like a dolphin.

Hey, stay focused.
I'm focused, James.

At the same time, I'm not.
Look at this.

(CLEARS THROAT)
Hello.

- Can I help you?
- Yep.

Where's Tasha?

Um, okay,
just give me a second.

I gotta get her
from the back.

- Tasha?
- TASHA: Yeah?

There's two police officers
here to see you.

All right.
Thanks.

Can I get anybody
a bottled water?

No, no, no. I'm fine.
I'm about to get married.

Oh. I'm engaged right now, so...

Didn't nobody ask you that.
I'm just letting her know.

Okay, you can't put
a fish in the water

if you don't
want him to swim.

I don't know
where he is,

and if I did
I wouldn't tell you.

You will if you wanna
see him alive again.

Now, AJ is in
way over his head

and we just
trying to help him.

And why should I believe you?

I didn't come here
to play with you.

You think I'm gonna give up my man?
Oh, you're gonna give him up.

Guaranteed, you're gonna give him up...
Nope, I'm not.

BEN: Stop.
It's a little too much.

Tasha...

James may not understand
what you're saying, but I do.

I mean, you and AJ
obviously have a connection,

and you're trying to
honor him right now.

Right, James?

My question to everyone
standing here is,

is he honoring you,Tasha?

Because when I went through
this phone, here...

I'm not gonna lie to you.

I was kinda thrown off

by what was going on
in the contact list.

Especially Favorites,

because the first name I
came across was Colette.

I said, "Who is Colette?"

More importantly,
"What's her ringtone?"

So I played it.

(DIRTY SONG PLAYING)

I don't know about you,
but that throws me off.

'Cause it's hyper-sexual.

What's that
relationship about?

So I said, "Maybe
that's the only one."

But then right underneath
it, I see "Bree."

Bree? Yeah. Who is that?
What's her ringtone?

So I played it.

- (EXPLICIT SONG PLAYING)
- Ugh.

James, do you hear that?

Let me see.

Yeah, he licking that
up and down, no doubt.

James, that's a little graphic.
It's true.

Well, disregard that.

So, then I started
thinking about you.

You're priority.
At least, I thought you were.

But, then, I see your name
at the bottom of the list.

So, I said, "Maybe he
saved the best for last."

Then I played
your ringtone, Tasha.

This is where it got dark.

- (APPLE DEFAULT RINGTONE PLAYING)
- Ugh.

Tasha, that's a Apple chime.

That's a factory ringtone.
That costs absolutely nothing.

That's the guy that
you wanna take up for?

Mr. "Generic Ringtone
For My Lady"?

I'm just asking.

That is how you talk to a woman.

I got AJ's cell phone burner
number just like that.

And, here's the thing...
(SHUSHING)

Okay. When did we
start doing that?

All right, Maya, what you got?

My guy Alonso's following
a lead on the explosives.

He said it's definitely
not from the States.

We got a number on AJ.

No, Ben got a number on AJ.

His girl say he
stole some money,

but she didn't
know from who.

Great. Let me know
when you find him.

WOMAN: Champagne? Here you go, baby.
I'll take that.

What are you doing?

Why is it so hard for you
to say the word "we"?

What is wrong with you?
What's wrong with you?

Is that her number
saved to your phone already?

With a smiley face next to it?

Let's go.

The smiley face with the tongue
sticking out is what you're doing now?

You know why Tasha gave us the
number that we needed, James?

I got the human touch.

That's what I'm telling you.
You just got to be open.

Okay. And let me tell
you something, James,

that is much more important
than being focused.

Just stop for a second,
listen to me.

Here's what we're going
to focus on from now on.

I'm going to deal with all of the human parts.
Male or female.

Oh, you wanna deal with
all the male human parts?

That's not what I said.
That's exactly what you said.

Don't twist my words.

(CELL PHONE RINGING)

Hello?
Ben Barber speaking.

How'd you get this number?

It's a little something called
platinum-level detectiveness, AJ.

Give me that phone.

AJ, your girlfriend told us
about the money you stole.

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
I didn't steal any money.

Be open.

You need to turn yourself in, man.
We need to keep you safe.

How do I know you weren't
in on trying to kill me?

If I wanted to smoke you,
you'd be dead already.

What you need to understand is

you got some major heat on you.

The kind of heat that
your skinny ass can%take.

I hang up, AJ,
you dead in 24 hours.

Look around, man. We're
the only friends you got.

You know what? I'm sick
of talking to your ass.

Here. Wait, wait, wait!
Wait, wait.

Hello?
Hello? Hello?

Hello?
Hello.

What's going on?
Ben Barber back on the phone.

Okay, I'll text you a time and location.
Just you, or I bolt.

What was that?
It worked, didn't it?

POPE: This nerd steals my
money, exposes my operation,

and he's still
walking the streets?

I put my
best guys on him.

Oh, you better.

The livelihood of merchants
across the globe depend on it.

I get it.
I don't think you do.

My pipeline is opening.
We are exposed.

Kill him.

Yes, sir.

And what about the payment?

Did it get through,
or did that get stolen, too?

Receipt confirmed
by the new commissioner.

Oh, look at that. One thing done right.
Things are looking up.

Now, get out of here.
I'm late.

(CELL PHONE CHIMES)

Here it is.

All right, remember what I told you.
Yeah.

One eye on him
and one eye out.

I can't do it. You do it.
Show me how to do it.

Man, you not a lizard.

Just scan. Well, then
you have to say that.

Get out.
Okay.

I'll be listening.
All right.

BEN: I'm walking on
the damn beach.

Listen, AJ, I don't have
time to play games with you.

Where are you? Whoa, whoa.
Slow your roll, son.

It's not that easy.
We gotta make sure we're clear.

Watch your tone. I didn't come
out here to be sassed by you.

Okay, walk to the booth.

What booth? Where?

The other way. Turn around.

This booth?
Yeah, that booth right there.

Okay, I'm walking.
Going to the booth.

Now what? I'm here.

Okay, I want you
to pick up a can.

I got it.
Now, put it back down.

AJ, what are we
doing right now?

I'm seeing if
you're being followed.

Then say that. That makes sense.
Say that.

Just walk.
All right, walking.

Stop.

Remove your shirt.

BEN: Why am I
removing my shirt?

AJ: To make sure
you're not wired.

See that?
There's no wire.

Ooh! You are shredded.

Abs of steel.

- Stop playing games.
- AJ: Okay, walk to the trash can.

To the trash can?
Going.

All right.

Now what?

Now reach into
the trash can

and take out
whatever's on top.

- Is he digging in the trash?
- BEN: All right, I got it.

M: Okay, open the contents
and tell me what it is.

It's just some
half-eaten nachos

with sauce and guacamole
and hair all in it.

Good. That's perfect.

Eat it.

I'm sorry, what?

Eat it.

No! I'm not eating this!

Do it or I walk.

You better not eat that.

(LAUGHS)
That's just nasty.

AJ: (LAUGHING)
That was sick.

I can't believe you
actually did that.

That shit was gross.

BEN: AJ, get your ass
out here right now.

AJ, you got two seconds to get
out here before you go to jail.

We gotta get out of here. This
is not the place for this.

Then why would you ask me
to meet you out here?

I didn't think it through.

AJ! AJ!

JAMES: Okay, AJ, somebody
is trying to kill all of us.

They blew up my car
looking for you,

so you need to come clean
and tell us who it is.

I already
told you everything.

(TYRES SCREECHING)

Oh, we got company.

Whoa! Get down!

Shit!

What are you doing?
I'm about to start shooting!

You ain't never shot
out of a moving car!

You gonna drive
or you gonna shoot, James?

Pick one!
Shit!

(PEOPLE SCREAMING)

Switch!
I'm going over.

- Hurry! Wait!
- (HORN BLARING)

You guys are
gonna do that now?

JAMES: Stop!
Get your ass off of me!

James, get off...

I got it! I got it!

Oh, my God!

Why you got the damn seat
so far back, James?

(TYRES SCREECHING)

Front!
James!

All right, don't head
straight at them!

Not right now, James.
I'm getting in my mode.

What mode?

What the hell are you doing?

Ben!

(TYRES SCREECHING)

Fuck!

Get back!

They're coming back!
I got it.

Hold on!

What the hell was that?

What?

Huh?

That's called driving!

Where you learn
how to drive, man?

James, just get off my back
and let me do me.

Bust a U!
Hold on!

(SCREAMING)

JAMES: Lose them!
I'm driving, James.

Right now, I don't need
that type of pressure.

Let me out of here!
Worried about what I'm doing?

How about you
shoot somebody?

Lean back!

Don't shoot across
my face like that!

(TYRES SCREECHING)

Are you signaling?

I'm sorry! It's a habit!

GUNMAN: He's making a right.
This is too easy!

Ahhh!

He told you
not to do that!

Listen, I got a plan.

Well, execute
the goddamn plan!

Here we go!

He's making another right.
Everybody hold on!

Shit! He went left!

Yeah!

I'm Ben Barber, bitch!

AUTOMATED VOICE:
Game over.

Get your ass out.
Come on, dude!

Ow! Let me go.
You guys are nuts.

Where the hell are we?

Safe house.

We staying here till we
find out who we can trust.

Really, fellas?

- BEN: Whose house is this?
- MAYA: Alonso's. My explosives guy.

He's out on a case.

Who the hell is she?

I'm Miami homicide.

James, if you
give me to the cops,

I will be hanging from a bedsheet.

You think I give a damn, AJ?

Now, who did you steal from,
and who's shooting at us?

I ain't telling you shit.
Is that right?

Pope! Antonio Pope!

- A-N-T-O-N-I-O...
- MAYA: Antonio Pope?

- That's bullshit.
- AJ: It's not bullshit, all right?

Everyone thinks Pope
is this legit businessman,

but he's so not.

He is a huge criminal, into everything.
Drugs, guns...

So Troy must be
his Atlanta boy.

Yes!

That's a big operation.

Catching Pope would
get us Troy for sure.

To sum up, I'm his
cyber dark arts guy.

I hack into his competition,
I install his systems.

I launder his money.

You just admitted to about four
or five crimes right there.

No, it's Fifth Amendment.

A couple of days ago,

I may have taken some
money from his account

and put it into mine.

- BEN: You "may have"?
- MAYA: What?

I didn't think he'd notice.
Apparently, he did.

Maya, what the hell is that...

Stop right there!

Drop your gun, man!
You put it down!

- Drop it!
- MAYA: Hold on!

- (SCREAMING)
- AJ, stop screaming!

I'll shoot your face!

This is Alonso,
my explosives guy.

I don't give a damn!
Put it down, now!

- Alonso, holster your weapon. They're cops.
- JAMES: Don't do it, man.

You better drop it!
Put your gun away.

JAMES:
Put it down, Castro!

Drop it!

It's down, okay?
You put it down.

- Ben, we're good.
- BEN: All right.

- (GRUNTS)
- MAYA: What the hell?

Again?
You've done this before?

- I don't know what to tell you, James!
- (AJ WAILING)

Okay, I'm on edge.
We're cop killers.

My nerves is bad, man!

I told you to focus!
You think I meant to do it!

I thought he shot.

You didn't shoot, so I shot!
(GASPING)

Oh, my God!
He a zombie! Head shot!

Whoa! Whoa!
Whoa! Whoa!

- Hold up! Hold up! Hold up!
- (GUNSHOT)

It's a vest!

Idiots.

It's a vest.

That's why I need a vest, James.
Accidents like this.

Who are these two fools, and
what are they doing in my house?

They're the officers
from Atlanta.

It was their car that exploded.
Hey, man.

I'm Ben Barber.
I apologize.

Hey, man. Céllate Ia boca. What?

Or I reach into your chest and
snatch out your midget heart.

Okay, I came over
here to apologize.

You shot me.
Well, I take it back.

Take the sorry with you and leave!
Fine!

Can we just stay focused?
Did you find anything out?

The explosive from the car
and the detonator, both rare.

Eastern-European, actually.

It's freaking Pope!

Can you stop with that!

Hold on, Maya.
He could be telling the truth.

It would take someone
with serious reach

to locate that kind of
untraceable device.

You're gonna help me get
some hard evidence on him.

Pope ain't gonna stop
shooting at your ass,

so we the only choice you got.

You set up his
computer, right?

So, can you get us into it?

Someone would need to
get to his home computer,

and download
the shipping manifests.

Well, Pope's having a party
at his mansion tonight.

Security's gonna be tight.

There's gonna be a lot of
foreign dignitaries there.

No problem.

We're gonna get in
there undetected,

he's gonna let us know
where the computer is,

and he gonna
talk us through.

How do we get in undetected?

Name?

(IN GRUFF VOICE)
My name.

My name.

Prince Admiral Steven Matumbe.

Nigerian Consul.

Plus two.

My two servants.

I don't have you
on the list.

Then check the VIP list.

And do not look me in my eye.

Don't look at me.

You look at the pad,
you read the names.

And you look at me,
and you close your eyes.

Look at me.
Don't look at me.

Look at me!

That was a test.
You failed.

You aren't on it.

All right, stall him, guys.

AJ's on it.

GUARD:
Step aside, por favor.

Wait!

This is all your fault.

You know I do what
lam supposed to do.

I clothe you, I feed you,

and yet your incompetence
furiates me.

Sir.

I'm your bodyguard,
not your servant.

(GRUNTS)

You are what I say you are!

Oh, God.

Sorry, sir.

You got a fly on your face.

Ooh.

Traditional.
A sign of respect.

AJ: Okay, try it now. Check
the first one more time.

(CHUCKLES LIGHTLY)
There it is.

Sorry about that.
Head right in.

I will go.

No,no,no!

BEN: Release me!
This way.

Where are we?
I cannot feel my face.

And you're welcome.

(MUSIC PLAYING)

Hello.

Remember,
we're on the defense.

AJ is on the earpiece.

All you gotta do is
download the file.

You trust him to do this?

Of course not.
Do we have a choice?

First of all,
Ben can hear you.

Oh, James, look at that!

They got a Baccarat
diamond dolphin.

Yeah, he probably got
a Gucci toilet, too.

Do I look like I care? Stay on point.
Just walk.

If he got a Gucci toilet,
I'm sitting on it.

There he is.
AJ, can you hear us?

AJ: Hey, is this
a passed-app event?

Because I'd love
a wonton or two.

It's not racist if I say it.

Where are we going?

First, you have to get
to the north hallway.

It leads to
the other wing of the house.

I'm gonna create
a distraction.

You guys, act casual
until you see an opening.

What you doing?
Put your hands down.

I'm waving.

Law enforcement is always
welcome at my functions.

So, Mr. Pope,
do you dance?

Do I dance?

You're in for a treat.

(LATIN DANCE-POP
MUSIC PLAYING)

- Are you dancing?
- Yes.

Well, stop.

Okay, it worked.

Let's get busy.

He's really good, though.
I'm not sure... Let's go.

- Okay, Ben, go up the first set of stairs.
- BEN: Roger that.

And, proceed to
the end of the hallway.

All right, James,
it's stealth mode time.

Do you even know what
"stealth mode" mean?

Yes, it's from
Assassin's Creed.

It means to be undetectable.

The double doors to his
office are on the left.

BEN: Okay.

Tell me when you're there. All right,
AJ, this must be it right here.

It's locked, AJ.
Okay, you know what?

Guest bathroom is down the hallway.
We'll get in from there.

Okay. Let's go, man.

(INDISTINCT CHATTER ON RADIO)

Go, go, go.
I got this.

Hey, man.

- Did you see her?
- See who?

I think she went
down there.

She said she was
gonna have my baby.

- No, man, you can't be up...
- (RETCHING)

Get downstairs.

Use the bathroom downstairs.
Get down there.

M: Okay, I need you to go over
to the window and open it.

Okay, I see it.
I see it. I see it.

Okay.
All right, it's open.

Climb out.
I'm sorry, what?

You heard me.
I said climb out.

Uh, AJ, I'm two stories up.

Look we're here now.
So own it.

Ain't nobody say
nothing to me about

getting out of a window
two stories up.

Ben, get on that damn ledge.

I'm two stories up, James!

You heard me!
Get on that ledge.

Now.

They got
a Gucci toilet, James.

(BEN EXHALES DEEPLY)

Come on, Ben.

Okay.

Okay.

Hey, guys?

I'm in between two lamps
and a hard place.

I'm just gonna... I'm just
gonna try to reach for it.

Okay?

No, no! Guys! Lost balance!

(SCREAMING)

Oh! God!

Stupid...

(DEEP GROWL)

(HISSING)

- (SCREAMING)
- (GROWLS)

(GROANS)
Excuse me, sir.

Can I offer you
a lamb burger?

Stop! James!

Get back! Get back!

- Lamb burger?
- Yeah.

I ain't never had one of them.
Let me see.

Help! James!

(SCREAMING)
Oh, my God!

This has got a Spanish kick to it.
What kind of cheese is that?

Manchego cheese.
Manchego?

BEN: Leave me alone!

Help!

You didn't
cook these, did you?

Get your ass back!

(SCREAMING)

Ben, what's going on?

Get back!
Gator got my foot!

Get off! Get off my ankle!

Leave me alone!

I don't wanna die like this!

I don't care!
You can keep it!

- (MUSIC STOPS)
- (APPLAUSE)

- (GRUNTING)
- AJ: Hey, Ben, you okay?

Are you, okay? Confirm.

BEN: Shut the hell up, AJ!

You couldn't tell me
that he had a alligator?

Well, I dropped the ball on that.
I won't lie to you.

A alligator!

Did Marcus bite you?

Can I offer you a drink?

Oh... No.

BEN: Wait. Maya, I need more time!
A gator got my shoe.

Yes. Yes, I would actually
love to have a drink.

Fantastic.

- Do you like tequila?
- Yeah.

All right. What's going on?

BEN: Hold on, James.

Okay.

Okay, AJ, I'm headed
in the office right now.

Wait, wait!
What? What?

He got a alligator in here?

No. It's gator-free
from here on out.

There's an audio alarm system.

Well, when were you
gonna tell me that?

You don't think that's
need-to-know information, AJ?

No one's perfect! All right,
just get to the desk quietly.

Stop playing. This is serious.
Okay.

Going to the desk now.

- Oh! He got a black panther!
- (METAL CLANGING)

Jesus!

Quietly, Ben.
(GRUNTS)

MAN: The alarm system is picking
up some audio in Pope's office.

Check it out.
Copy.

James?
Ben set off the alarm.

You're gonna have
to run interference.

East hallway.
He's traveling towards you.

Okay. Okay.

Hydrangeas.

(SNIFFING)
He's got hydrangeas.

(SNORTING AND SNIFFLING)

Okay, AJ.

I'm at the computer.
Guide me through it.

Okay, there's a seven-digit code

that he inputted himself,
so I don't know it.

But I use my own personal code
on there, as well.

Because, you know, why not?

You really are a criminal, aren't you, AJ?
What's the code?

Open bracket, O,

closed bracket, space,

open bracket,
O, closed bracket.

Wait a minute.
Wait, are they...

Titties, yep.

What now, AJ?

Now, plug in that flash drive I
gave you and open the file on it.

All right, I got it.

The rest takes care of itself.

- Thank you, my darling.
- My pleasure.

So tell me about this tequila.
Is it rare?

One of the rarest on the market.
Impossible to purchase.

Salud.

(GRUNTS)

AJ: Okay, moments away, guys.

Look, you guys
need to hurry up.

I ain't gonna keep
knocking people out all night.

Okay, it's done.

- Did you know...
- JAMES: Maya, let's roll.

Oh, I gotta go.

Mmm.

Thank you.
Okay. My hand.

I gotta go.

High five.

Here you go.

BEN: This has got to be one
of the worst goddamn days.

Alligators, hydrangeas,
swords all over the place.

Where your shoe?

It's a long story, James.

The man got
a damn alligator.

You look silly!

This look better, James? Huh?

Is that better, now?

Hey, guys, did you get it?

Yes. I'm a professional!

Okay, we gotta go.

Officers.

Interesting look.

Interesting home.
In my country...

Cut the act.
Yes.

The party is this way.

I insist.
Okay.

Have a drink.

Rémy? Dom?

I got this shit from Peru.

Illegal in the States, but it
can keep you up all night.

If you know what I mean.

JAMES: No.

We're not thirsty.

I'm not thirsty.

(CHUCKLES) Look at that.
Class is still in session.

Hmm?

When are you going to let Ben
make his own mistakes, James?

Yes, that's right.
I know your names.

Does that surprise you?

Perhaps the bigger
question is,

why are the Atlanta police
crashing my party?

Well, we thought that you might
have a problem with theft.

Now that you
mention it, I did have

an embezzlement
issue this week.

Don't remember
reporting it, though.

I'm guessing that you
found the culprit.

Hmm?

Oh, you douchebag.

I think you know
who took from me.

And if I don't get
some answers soon,

a few of my city official
friends in Atlanta

won't be too happy to learn

that one of their benefactors
is being harassed.

In his own home, no less.

What, you gonna
snitch on us?

Do you think we care?

It is true that one of you might
just receive a reprimand.

But what if one of you is still
on his probationary period?

That particular officer,
he could be eliminated.

- Just like that.
- BEN: Wait, wait, wait.

I don't think we need to ruin
anybody's careers here.

Especially with
the unemployment rate

being so high
amongst blacks now.

Tranquilo.

I'm sorry, what?

Listen, all I know is that I'm a
victim of a hacker who stole from me.

I don't even want
to have him arrested.

I just want to
figure out how he got in,

so I can prevent it
from happening again.

I'm worried that my
charities are vulnerable.

So, if you are
not here to help,

why did you come?

I heard you had
a Gucci toilet.

I think we're done here.

My men will show you out.

And the next time
you want to come

to one of my parties, just ask.

Your parties suck.

POPE: What went wrong?

Now, I'm feeding
these people sliders,

and having conversations
I don't want to be having?

Take it easy. I'm not
going to shoot you.

This is just a prop
to make my point.

We are multi-national now.

Any mistakes will
be way too costly.

Hmm?

No more annoying conversations.

No more excuses.

Just get the job done.

Sorry, Antonio.

Definitely kill them.

I just don't want to
get blood on my pants.

Okay, I found a discussion he tried
to erase on his big solar project.

Looks like Pope orders his guy

to delete certain shipments
from the manifest.

But he specifically
tells that guy

to leave other
shipments alone.

Why would he wanna hide
shipments of solar panels?

Because it's not solar panels.

He's got one of them hidden
shipments arriving tomorrow.

JAMES: We need to find out
what's in that shipment.

Wait.

Does that mean
what I think it means?

BEN: We are on a stakeout!

Long-time dream
achievement, unlocked.

You know, I think I really
proved myself this trip.

And, I guarantee you, James, that
truck gonna be full of drugs.

All right, man, slow down.

If the Port Commissioner wasn't
cooperating, it could be a problem.

One to kill for.

He tried to cooperate, but
Pope still killed him anyway.

How do you know that?
I was there, on Pope's yacht.

When I told you to tell me
everything you know,

why you didn't tell me
everything you knew?

I didn't see anything, all right?

I was listening in on his phone.

Well, then, shut up
with all that hearsay.

It's not admissible in court.

Star Wars,
the original trilogy.

Name them and
rank them, let's go.

Episode Five,
Empire Strikes Back.

Episode Four, New Hope.
Episode Six, Jedi. Boom.

Empire Strikes Back?

What?

Return of the Jedi,
I don't know.

Jedi! Oh, my God.
Those Ewoks?

- BEN: The Ewoks are what made Star Wars.
- (EXCLAIMS MOCKINGLY)

They're so annoying.
No, no.

- James? James?
- AJ: Maya? Maya?

James, real quick.
Maya.

James? James?
Maya? Maya?

If you could be a shark or a
eagle, which one would you be?

Shark! You got so
many disadvantages

being a shark. If you're
an eagle, you're flying!

I saw a eagle take this
lady baby one time. No!

Biggie Smalls.
Is he slightly overrated?

He's no Sir Mix-a-Lot.

BEN: What?

Maya? Maya?
Maya? Maya?

James? James?
James?

Shut up!
Shut up!

(GRUNTS)

Damn.

They got some nerve.

He never stops talking. He's
got to be able to breathe.

Yep. Trust me, I know.
(CHUCKLES)

Nine out of 10 things
out that dude mouth

is either crazy,
irrational, or silly.

But that 10th thing...

Tenth thing goes
beyond crazy, you know,

into a, like,
accidental genius realm.

I'm gonna
ask you something.

If you really
feel that way,

why are you so
tough on that guy?

All he wants is
to be a detective.

He's setting himself up for a
disappointment when we get back, so...

(VEHICLES APPROACHING)

Trucks! James!
Oh!

BEN: I see the trucks!
The trucks are coming, look!

Give it to me.

AJ, get ready to check the container
numbers against the Port's manifest.

Copy that.

MAYA: All right, where are we going?
Where are we going?

This is the one. Right here.
What's the number?

- 4-5-5-2-3-4-5-5.
- (KEYBOARD CLACKING)

That number does not exist.
It's a ghost.

Jackpot

(TYRES SCREECHING)

There you go.

Copy that. We're heading
west on Port Bridge.

Bring all units
on outbound lanes

and set up
a blockade at Biscayne.

PILOT: This is MDPD Air One.

En route following
westbound 886...

(SIRENS WAILING)

Okay, here we go.

(TYRES SCREECHING)

Hands! Hands up!

BEN: Get your hands up!
Get them hands up!

- Put your hands up!
- JAMES: Ben, get the door!

Out the cab, Slim!

Hurry up!
Turn around!

You know who this
truck belong to?

Yeah, it belong to me.

Us!

It's our first bust!

As the brothers-in-law.

Get to the back.
Right. I'm on it.

Open it up!

All right, Ben, let me
know what we got, partner.

Is it my birthday?

No!

Okay, it must be Christmas!

What we got?

HERNANDEZ: Department's about
to get sued for harassment.

And, I get to explain
to the new Port Commissioner,

why we've made a mess
of his front yard!

We had good intel.

It was an unregistered,
off-the-books shipment.

It was a clerical error.

I really don't understand

what I gotta do to get off

whatever shit list
I seem to be on, here.

Mr. Pope, let me apologize.

See, I don't get it.

I've tried to be nice.
I've tried to be cool.

Did I press charges when you
three crashed my party? No.

But, now...

See, now, I'm pissed.

I have a reputation to protect.

This is gonna come out weird,

but I'm really, really rich.

I mean, I make sick money.

And, do you know what
that money buys me?

Hmm?

Access.

So, you can imagine

that I have already
begun to make calls

up the chain of command.

So, James, it looks to me like your
training day is officially over.

But hey, good luck on
your future careers,

or whatever.

Captain!

Can I have a word?

HERNANDEZ:
You, come with me.

You can help me explain this
mess to the new commissioner.

Shit.

Ouch.

That went really badly.

It's kind of hard to
think of any outcome

that's gonna be worse
than that, right there.

(CELL PHONE RINGING)

It's about to get worse.

Hello?

Milk run, huh? I'm gonna assume
you've been chewed out already,

so I'm gonna save my voice.

James, we're talking about
a lengthy suspension.

Ben,you're still probationary,

so there's really no choice.

Wait, Lieutenant Brooks.
Hold on, now.

There'll be a hearing,
but it's just a formality.

You're done as a cop, Ben.

Like "done," done?

Lieutenant, you don't wanna
hear my side of the story?

No! Just get your
asses back here!

Please, don't do this.

You did this!
You and James!

- Lieutenant!
- (CALL DISCONNECTS)

Here, man.

What the hell did we miss?

I know that shipment ain't nothing
but a front to move coke.

Yeah, but the containers
was empty, James.

Maybe the container
was made of coke.

I'll put a pin in that.

(WHISPERS) I gotta use
the bathroom so bad.

(CELL PHONE RINGING)

This is Ang.

Hey, what's up, babe?

- Ben, I need you here now.
- CORI: Angela?

Cori is driving me crazy.

You said two days.
I know.

Hey, I'm marrying someone on Saturday.
I'd prefer it to be you.

Look, the whole thing
just went pear-shaped.

We took a swing and
we missed bad, Ang.

We missed real bad.

(SIGHS)
I am so sorry.

But, no matter
how bad it went,

I still have faith in you.

I appreciate that,
babe, but you got...

And, I always will.

We can get through anything.

Together.

I just want you to
know that I love you.

I love you so much.

Love you.

I was about to tell her
I lost my job,

but then I started
thinking like,

"No, just wait till
you get home, because..."

Hey, guys.

I was just thinking about the
Port Commissioner's replacement.

It's weird how he showed up on
the bridge right after Pope.

So?

You don't kill
the Port Commissioner

if you don't control
the replacement.

- Makes sense.
- BEN: That makes a lot of sense.

Jukebox is ready.

Got that Taylor Swift song
you wanted, player.

Look, if Nunez is in on it,

that means Pope is moving
contraband through the port.

Nunez? Charlie Nunez?

That was one of the names on Pope's payroll
report on his computer. (CHUCKLES)

Was that important?

Asshole played us.

He planted the info
on his computer,

let us find that container,
got us to prove his innocence,

so that the other containers
could skate through.

Son of a bitch. When is
the next shipment, AJ?

One every morning this week.

We gotta hit him in the morning, then.
Let's do it!

- Let's do it!
- AJ: Let's go.

I should have put that together.
Can I talk to you?

Okay. James?

Look, I knew
about the containers,

but my thing is, I didn't
think further than that.

And, that's where
I went wrong.

Look,Ben, I just want to...
Stop, stop.

You don't have to say it.
I already know what you're gonna say.

Listen, man, I just
brought you over here

to tell you, you're not going.

What are you talking about?

I am going.
No, you're not.

Yes, lam, James.
No, you're not.

You just got
kicked off the force.

You know what, James?

I've been out here
putting my life on the line,

to prove to you that
I can be a detective.

I don't know what your real problem is,
James, but this is what I wanna...

Listen!

You getting married to
my sister, all right?

This thing goes wrong,
you can end up in jail.

Or worse.

You can end up dead.

BENZ: What... Oh.

I'm sorry, Ben, but this
is for your own good.

Okay, look, they're not gonna let
us within a mile of the port.

We gotta take
a boat and head north.

AJ: You got a boat?
James! Hey, stop!

James!

I'll tell you
how it goes.

AJ, AJ, AJ, AJ!

AJ!

MAYA: Look, our best bet is to take
a boat across the bay at dawn.

JAMES: So your captain
just let you take out

cars and boats
whenever you want to?

MAYA: I don't know.
I don't ask him.

Come on.

Hey, don't shoot me, man!

Ain't nobody gonna shoot you.
Show me your hands!

Man, stop it! Come on, get up.
I need your help.

For what?

(INAUDIBLE)

All right, AJ. When we get
up here, I need you to hide.

Okay.

What do you wanna do?

Slice his hamstrings,
take him down?

Wow. (STAMMERING)

That's a bit aggressive.

I think there's a different
way we could do this.

Hey, man, do you know
where South Beach is?

'Cause my GPS ain't
working worth a...

(GRUNTING)
That is pretty impressive.

Wanna give it a try?
Can I get him under here?

Yeah, now twist.

(GRUNTING)

Right?
Oh! Yeah.

You know,
I gotta do this on Ben.

Let me show you how we
do it in the A, though.

Yeah. Well,
that works, too.

We got him.

Send a car over to
pick up Pope's ass.

POPE: I'm already here.

Freeze!

As a matter of fact,
I'm everywhere.

Psst! God! You scared
the shit out of me.

Hey, how'd you get out of...
Don't worry about it.

Where's James and Maya at?

Checking a container
somewhere over there.

The container yard.

This is classic boss level.

Something always goes down
in the container yard.

And it's not just cocaine.

I'm opening a contraband
super highway.

Guns, drugs, freaking
whale meat. Whatever.

I think there's even a pygmy
giraffe in one of these.

Fun.

I had to come down
to see it for myself.

And, look what I find.

BEN: Shit, Pope's got them.

You stay here.
l got an idea.

(CHUCKLING)

You look discouraged.

I feel bad
for you guys.

It's like when my nephew loses
a soccer game. I wanna...

I wanna give you
a hug and a Capri Sun.

But I feel worse
for these guys.

I mean, they have to kill
two rogue cops

who they mistook
for terrorists.

Uncool. They have
to live with that.

I have a better idea.

How about having a professional
take care of it, hmm?

Ben Barber, bitches!

BEN: Hold up, James!
Now, I got it!

Yeah!

(GRUNTING)

Did I do that?

Oh, shit!

(GRUNTING)

Oh, shit!

Help!

Backup! I need backup!

Help! Help!

Hey! Hurt Locker!

Oh, God!

(GROANS)

(BREATHING HEAVILY)

(GRUNTS)

(GRUNTS)

Maya, down!

You're welcome.
Let's go.

You have been
a real nuisance.

I swear,
I'm a double-secret-spy.

I volunteered to infiltrate
myself in the crew.

(SCREAMS)

Shit.

Ah! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
I won't do it again!

(GRUNTS)

Look!

Here we go!

(SCREAMING)

Oh, shit!

Come on, Ben!

Oh, I got you now.

(LAUGHS)

Take this, Pope!

(TYRES SCREECHING)

All right, Pope!

It's over!

Let me see them hands!

Out the cab, now!

Get out, Pope! I will...

- It's clear!
- POPE: Oye, chicos.

Are you looking for something?

Put the gun down, please.

Put down your weapons, now!

Now, this is the part
where I needlessly

tell you that you are going to die.
Blah, blah, blah.

But, of course,
you already know that.

So, which one of you
would like to go first, hmm?

James, let's start with you.

(SCREAMING)

Ben!

Why'd you
do that, man?

You're always trying some Assassin's
Creed, Call of Duty stuff.

Got on a vest.

You got on a vest?
(GROANS)

BEN: See that?

We protect each other, James.

I don't know about that.

Technically, you got a vest on.
I know.

I definitely
saved your life, man.

(CHUCKLES)
Don't go too far, now.

He could've shot me
in the damn head, James.

He didn't!

Maya, did I save his life?
Maybe a little.

Thank you.

(GUNSHOT)

James!

MAYA: It's clear!

JAMES: You know what?

You might have
saved my life that time.

(HOARSELY)
I'm telling Angela.

Come on, walk it off.

I can't walk.

Rub some dirt on it.

I'm not puttin' no dirt
on no bullet holes!

Hey, man, we the brothers-in-law!
Not anymore.

Offer is off the table.

No brother-in-law of mine
would do that to me.

You tried to kill me.

HERNANDEZ: You took down a drug-dealer
and a crooked politician in three days.

I'm impressed.
I know.

That's how we do
it in Atlanta, Cap.

It's a pleasure.

Thanks, Captain.

Thanks for everything, Cap.

Good luck, guys.

Okay, look, we got eight
hours to make it back.

James, the only way we're going
to make it back is by plane.

Do I look like a bird?

James, stop, man,
I'm serious.

That's the only way we're
going to make it back.

I don't fly.

This is my wedding, James.

Hey!

After all that, you guys were gonna
leave without saying anything?

Nah, we was actually trying to figure
out how we was gonna get back.

Figured that.

So I got you something.

It's one of
Pope's cars.

Oh, my God!

Oh! Let me have it.

James!
It's nice.

- MAYA: Bring it back with no bullet holes.
- BEN: Oh, man!

James! You gotta make her
your "plus one," James!

Ask her how to open it.
I don't see the handle.

You've got to
let me drive this!

So, um...
Sure.

Huh?

You were inviting me
to the wedding, right?

I guess so.

I answered too quick, didn't I?
When I said, "Sure"?

It's okay.

I was waiting for you to...
But I thought that you...

Um... Sorry.

JAMES: See you later.

- James.
- What?

How do I... Hey,
I gotta drive this.

You don't need to open it.
Give me the key.

No, I'mma drive.
Give me the key.

No, James, I'mma drive.
Don't play with me.

- BEN: I'mma drive this time.
- Ben, give me that damn key.

James, I'm not gonna do this.
Gimme that.

Are you serious right now?

Give me the damn key!
No.

Get off! Get off!
Maya, call the cops!

BEN: No, James, you better wait.
Wait till I get in. (ENGINE REVVING)

Maya, this is great! Hey,
I'll see you at the wedding!

Here I come, Angela!

Yeah!

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to
you, Mr. and Mrs. Black Hammer.

BEN: (LAUGHING)
Black Hammer!

James, come here.

I'm your brother, in law.

I did it.
(LAUGHS)

- BEN: I love you.
- ANGELA: I love you.

Hey, uh, Cori, I just
wanted to say thank you.

You did a really
amazing job...

I did a what?

You did an amazing job.

Yeah, you don't
have to tell me that.

And the fact that you
think I couldn't do it,

makes me want to
hit you in your sack.

What?
Do you know what?

It's your day. Enjoy it.

Now where can you...

We're low on run,
we should go on a rum.

AJ, what are you doing?
I didn't even invite you, man.

(CHUCKLING) Okay,
I'll get it myself.

Happy Kwanzaa, Ben.
Sorry for your loss.

Assface, let me
borrow your keys!

It's a wedding, AJ.
Ain't nobody die.

(GUESTS CHEERING)

BEN: Thank you, babe.

Stop, guys.

Look, I should have told
you earlier, but I didn't.

I'm glad you decided
to finally join us.

You look really nice today.

Like, handsome.

Ben.
No, it's okay.

It's a compliment, just take it.
Not really a compliment.

All right.
You need to accept it,

because you're not gonna
get many from him.

James, about to get on the boat
and drive off with my wife.

Yep.

You wanna say anything nice to
me, this would be the time.

Oh.

Bye.

You wanna say something?
Goodbye.

James wants to make a toast!
Go ahead!

GUESTS: (CHANTING) Toast! Toast!
Toast! Toast! You said it.

Come on, big guy.

Toast
Toast

(EXHALES)

To Ben.

You've set me on fire,
stabbed me...

You stabbed him?
Was a accident.

Got two of my cars blown up.

(CLEARS THROAT)

And, uh, almost
got me killed

more times than
I can count.

Now, usually,
I'd toss him off the dock,

but in this case,

I can't do that.

Because,dude,
you saved my life,

made my sister happier
than I've ever seen her.

Don't you do this to me,
James. Not here.

And, in a crazy kinda way, made me
a better person and a better cop.

(INHALES DEEPLY)
Fight it, Ben.

To my brother-in-law.

Family.

You finally said
"family," James.

To Ben and Angela.

GUESTS: Ben and Angela!

(CHEERING)

You are something
else, buddy.

Come on, Ang.

ANGELA: You ready?

Yes!

(ENGINE STARTING)

Whoo! You hear that?
I hear it.

(MIMICS ENGINE GURGLING)

It's like a le tigre.

You know,
that's French for "puma."

It's not, actually.

Just go with the
moment, all right?

People back there want a show.
Let's give them one.

- Baby, you know what I want?
- What?

(WHISPERS)
The Black Hammer.

Then we need to get this
boat out of here, then.

- ANGELA: Bye!
- GUESTS: Bye!

AJ: Whoo! Bye!

Ben, I like this.

Before we go, let's loop
back around one more time!

I'mma show them what
we capable of, baby!

You could slow down
a little bit.

You ain't got nothing
to worry about!

You with the Black Hammer!

I'm just gonna get
a little more speed!

There's a boat
right in front of us.

I know how to
drive this boat!

That's the first thing
they teach you.

(SCREAMING)

(ALL EXCLAIMING)

ANGELA: Ben, hold on!
Hold on!

Angela! Stop the boat!

AJ: That's classic Ben.

Oh.
Oh.

Ben, how do I
stop this thing?

- Angela!
- What?

This marriage will never last.

Let's just pray for him.

Can he swim?
I hope not.

BEN: Ang, stop the boat!

James!

Welcome to the family,
brother-in-law!

BEN: Angela!
Are you trying to kill me?

Angela, dodge the buoys!

- (METAL CLANGING)
- BEN: Ow!

(HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING)

Improved By: Fidel33
Sub Upload Date: April 15, 2016