Rick and Ruby (2019) - full transcript

- You moving in, sweetheart?
- Sorry about that.

Mind if I post up here for a little bit?

I've had a fucking day.

- No, no, come on in.

We don't get many fillies in
the stable around here anyway.

- Where are you coming from, hon?

- Can I get a whiskey
neat and then a double?

Farther up North.

- Ooh, that's some road
medicine right there, ain't it?

You're after my own heart,

the way you throw that
whiskey back, young lady.



- Where you headed?

- Well, right now either
a motel or a repair shop.

My car shit the bed a while back.

You fellas wouldn't know

of any auto-repair shops
one around here, would you?

- 'Fraid not, ain't a lot in this area

except this here bar and a Baptist church

about 20 miles up the road

and ol' Lou's Sporting Goods
shop a few miles past that.

I tell you what though,

ol' Chick here, he's great
with anything with wheels

and I got a cot in the back

if you wanna stick around
with us for the evening.

- Promise I don't bite, much.



- I wish I could stay all night, boys.

But I really need to
get to a motel tonight.

Girl's gotta have all
her amenities, you know?

Plus, you wouldn't want

to see me without a good night's rest.

Don't want to let the monster out.

- Hey now, come on now,
don't be like that.

Party with us for a bit.

We'll set you straight.

- Name is Charles

but since we're becoming
real fast friends,

you can call me Chick?

And you are?

- Leaving but it was a pleasure, Charles.

- I don't like your attitude.

I'm just trying to be your friend here.

- I think I've had enough friendship

for one evening, excuse me.

- You'll have to forgive Chick here,

he's a little aggressive
with his first impressions

but I promise you,

he's a real gem.

And he's hung like a
goddamn horse too.

- Now, I don't normally
dig chink-y chicks,

but I been on the road
real, real, long time.

And a slit's a slit.

- Back up motherfucker.

- Easy lady.

Don't want you getting pricked, yet.

- Get off, no, no!
- Come on!

Come on, baby.
- Get the fuck off me!

Come on, baby.

- No, no, now, now.

The less kicking and biting you do,

the less kicking and
biting we're gonna do,

you got me?

- You ready for some hurt now, baby?

- Are you?

Fuckin.

- What the fuck?

- Jesus fucking Christ.

My back,

fuck.

Ruby, why didn't you let me out sooner?

Fuck.

The sun's been down for over an hour.

God I gotta stretch it out.

Ruby, I swear, you get
kinkier every waking day.

Next time you're trying to get dick down,

just leave me in the car.

- Really, right now?
- Sorry, sorry, sorry.

Where are my manners?

Hi fellas, I'm Rick,

I see you've already
gotten acquainted with Ruby

and I do apologize for the interruption

but would you mind if I have a smoke?

Okay, seriously, 12 hours,

12 hours in that fucking box.

- Who the fuck is this?
- That's Rick.

- Yeah, I'm Rick.

Come on man, we just met.

Did Ruby say something?

I bet she did, she tends
to get a little lippy,

get a little attitude, you know?

When she hasn't gotten any in a while.

Fuck off, Rick.

- See what I mean?

Ooh, she did a little number
on you now, didn't she?

Ooh, almost messed up

that handsome old face
of yours, didn't she?

But she didn't.

No, she didn't you're still ,

you're still a sexy hunk of meat.

This fucking faggot

sure does like to hear
himself talk, don't he?

- Jesus Christ, what part

of cousin-fucking America
did you drive us into, Ruby?

Speaking of which,

do any of these guys actually
work for Jackie Maddox?

- We're not even near Maddox yet, Rick.

- Seriously, so you just fell
into this gang rape situation?

- All right, hands on
the head fag in a box.

- Well, at least he's clever.

- These Yankees are into some kinky shit.

- Yeah, what the fuck you
doing dragging him around

in that damn box for anyway?

Is this some sort of queer
sex thing or something?

- Wow, they really can't get

off the gay stuff, can they?

As much as I'm sure that

that answer would thrill
you if I said, "yes,"

the truth of the matter is
actually much more interesting.

- You best fucking stop, boy.

- I'm actually very, very sick.

I've got this thing

that makes me ravenously
thirsty all the fucking time

and just to top it all off,

also makes me fucking allergic to the sun!

Really, really allergic,

like death by peanut allergy allergic.

So, I'm driving around
with Ruby right now trying

to find the fucking dick
nose that gave me this shit

and ruined Miami Beach

for me for-fucking-ever!
- All right,

last chance fucker.

- Hence, this luxurious,

and wonderful so-comfortable trunk

that she drags me around in during the day

so that my gorgeous,
sickly self doesn't get

into any kind of--

- Your gay ass boyfriend sure
was a chatty one, wasn't he?

- He certainly is.

- Damn, whoo!

Man, I haven't been
shot in like, five months

and I forgot how exhilarating it is.

- Son of a bitch.
- God damn,

I don't know what they feed
you hick fucks out here

but I could swear you were grass-fed.

Jesus, Ruby.

- Here, you piece of shit, redneck fuck!

- Do you want some of this, freak?

Really?

- A knife?

- You fucking, get fucked too.

Snap, crackle,

- How's this feel, you fucking cunt?

Fuck.
- Fuck, why?

- Give it a rest, Charles.

Now,

what's the worst hickey, you
ever gave a chick, Chick?

- Stop fucking shooting me!

- God damn it!

God damn it!

- You know and I even
gave you a head start.

Whoo!

Man.

He got a stick in the ass!

Fitting.
- Yeah.

- What, that's funny.

Come on, now.

Damn it.

- Okay.

Looks like six more hours to Maddox.

We should probably go.

- Yeah.
- Yeah.