Revenge of the Boarding School Dropouts (2009) - full transcript
Max and Eddie are stoner snowboarders living the life of rock stars. But all the photo shoots, video stardom, and parties are threatening the will of their snowboarding team. Their nemesis Kingsley Brown (Tom Green) and his sidekick Spinks attempt to throw a wrench into the works for Max & Eddie's riders, but this time they have even more tricks up their sleeves.
(gentle music)
(dramatic music)
(helicopter blades whirling)
♫ He's my definition
♫ For still holding on
♫ Just came through aggression
♫ Slipping out alive
♫ The world is not your playground
- Adios, compadre.
- Compadre?
Dude, he's pissed at you.
- For what?
I helped him try to fly that thing.
- He didn't want any help,
and he's pissed because you
tried to burn one on board.
- I did?
- Ah, dude, you're so burnt these days
you don't even remember.
- Remember what?
- Forget it, man, let's dig the moment.
Eddy, you old Yeti, we made it.
We're back on top.
- Oh no. Don't start with that again.
- Start with what?
- The "We made its."
Ever since we were kids
you'd always say that
and it would lead to our downfall.
- Eddy, this time it's different.
Our camp's making coin,
I'm back with Danielle,
you're partying more than ever,
and the kids are blowing up.
- You're right, Max, I don't
know what I was thinking.
(rock music)
(helicopter blades whirling)
♫ Don't wanna live, live in the abyss
♫ I can't go on with a life like this
♫ Half a life is nothing at all
♫ You got to rise above the crawl
♫ You got to be--
- Wow.
- Whoo!
- Do you smell that?
- Success!
- No.
- Freedom.
- Fresh air.
- Aw, Eddy!
That's fucking nasty.
- Takes a little while to get
out from all these layers,
but ate three bean quesadillas.
- All right, let's evacuate.
Drop it in.
(rock music)
(cheering)
- I'll race you down.
♫ Let's hug the sky, make it do or die
♫ I need the drummer
when I kick up the sound
♫ Let's hit the drive in a six red five
♫ And hit the highway
in a four wheel house
(mumbling)
- So, this is it guys.
First big comp of the season.
- Always kind of freaks me out.
- Yeah, I'm a little nervous too.
Last year, I didn't give a shit,
we had nothing to lose.
- Dog, this expo's nothing,
just TSA corporate bullshit.
- Yeah, but still.
I mean, I haven't been on a board
in three months or something.
Just feeling a little sketchy.
- In the summertime my boards have wheels,
instead of hitting the snow,
bam! I'm hitting the pavement.
Blood son. Blood.
- I had a great summer.
It was the first time
I didn't have to work, thanks to Danielle.
- Yeah guys, I mean,
we're about to shred our
first run of the season
and get paid for it. This is it.
- Let's go.
(uptempo techno music)
(women cheering)
Yo, guys...
I knew we was blowing up,
but this is wrong.
- Yeah. We better take the side door.
- You guys go ahead, I
just gotta grab something.
- [Chris] Alright, dude.
- I'm gonna love me some titties
and a whole lot of junk in the trunk.
- [Announcer] Good afternoon
ladies and gentlemen,
and welcome to the TSA Expo.
Showcasing the top riders
on the planet, as we kick
off a brand new season.
(uptempo rock music)
- This is my rider, Tracy.
- What I'm on TV?
Hey, yo mommy I'm on TV.
- [Tracy] Oh my God!
- Yeah!
You got that!
- Whoo!
- [Announcer] Oh, that is a
big 1080 from Chris James,
the star of the TSA Expo.
(laughing)
(cameras shuttering)
- Hey, girl.
- Ladies and gentlemen,
thank you very much for coming out
to the TSA Expo. Whoo!
(crowd cheering)
It is my pleasure to introduce to you
my brand new roster of this season,
and hopefully many more to come,
the future of snowboarding,
Team Max Shred!
(crowd cheering)
- [Max] Let's give it up,
for Team Max Shred! Yeah!
- [Crowd] Max Shred! Max Shred! Max Shred!
- Yeah! Whoo!
- This sport is being overrun
by drug addicts and deralets.
And it started on my watch.
- It ain't your fault, King.
It's that bitch Danielle.
Your old girlfriend.
Dirty whore.
Skanky little slut. Filthy cu--
- Hey! Spinks, I got the point.
- What the hell are you gonna do about it?
- Nothing. Max is a loser.
Will feed him enough rope,
let him hang himself.
Get the limo.
- Right away sir.
(slow rock music)
- To the spa, Spinks.
- Would that be Swedish
or Thai today, sir?
- I think I'm feeling shiatsu.
- Excellent choice.
(Spinks grunting)
(energetic rock music)
(laughing)
- Juice!
- That's right baby.
- [Max] Juice! You got
a rep to protect, man!
- Yeah, Juice. Kids look up to you now.
- For real!
- Speaking of reps, check it out,
Ross Rebagliati, snowboarding's
first gold medalist.
How's it going dude!
- Thanks for the party invite.
Hey, is there still a chance
I can get on the team?
- Well, you're gonna have
to take a blood test.
If it comes up clean, we don't want ya!
(laughing)
- I like your style Eddie the Yeti.
- Good hustle Ross!
- Hey guys, how 'bout a team photo?
Yo, Stills, get over here.
- Wait, where's Chris?
- There's Chris, hey Chris!
- [Tracy] I found him.
- Chris! Get over here, alright.
Fuck yeah, can I have this?
Alright, to you motherfucker.
(bottles clinking)
Ladies and gentlemen...
(bottle breaking)
- Max Fisher!
(crowd cheering)
- Alright. Thank you Eddy.
Everyone, raise your glasses
and join me in a toast
to a great event,
a great sponsor, and a great team.
And, a special toast
to our star of the day,
Chris James!
(crowd cheering)
- [Crowd] Team Max Shred! Team
Max Shred! Team Max Shred!
- You're blushing.
- No, I'm not.
- Yeah, you are, you're face is all red.
- No, it's not that--
- Come on, you're the shyest kid I know.
With press, with girls.
- No, Tracy it's not--
- Then what is it?
- It's just the champagne.
(spits)
I'm sorry.
- Gross.
- Sorry, I'm not big on this stuff.
- We're back on top babe.
(laughing)
Right where we left off.
- Ah no, where we left off was you
doing body shots off some
slut at the Stubby Bar,
and then passing out in Eddie's lap.
Now this time it's different.
You're helping these kids, it's wonderful.
- It's insanely wonderful.
(laughing)
You and me, we're gonna be huge.
We're gonna take Chris to the top.
- What are you talking about,
"Take Chris to the top"?
What about the others? What about Tracy?
She won the best female in her event,
no one's toasting her.
- Tracy!
♫ To take off your clothes
- You're not even listening.
- No. I hear what you're saying.
But Chris is the golden ticket.
If he does well, we all do well.
- Okay.
I'm just sayin, be careful.
- Look at that.
(mumbling)
They all want him.
We gotta fight to keep him.
(mellow reggae music)
Hold this for a second.
Yo Chris man, come hang
out with the rest of us!
(water splashing)
You like champagne man,
let's get some more.
- Careful ladies, these
two men resent women.
- Then why the hell do we
plow the crap out of 'em all the time?
- Leave those bozos alone.
Don't let them get to ya.
We're here on business.
- You got it, King.
- Well, Kingsley.
What brings you here?
I thought you were out of business.
- No. I left the association
with a very handsome package.
- Spinks?
- No, you idiot. Money.
Enough to start my own agency.
I'll be repping some of the
biggest minds in the industry.
Perhaps you've heard of, Tomahawk?
- Really? Who's riding for ya?
- Wouldn't you like to know.
- Yeah, I would. That's why I asked.
- You will find out soon enough, Max.
Step aside, we've got
some shmoozing to do.
- Alright.
(laughing)
- So, Max, where are these experienced
assistants you were telling me about?
- Yo, dudes!
- Yo, my boys! My peeps!
- [Mikey] Sup suckas!
- Looking forward to
making this shit legit!
Gonna help you dial this shit in, son.
Yo, just show me where the dial's at!
- Yo, dog, this shit spreads
easier than your mom's legs.
- Hey, fuck you.
- Max, for fucks sakes.
- Pete, let's make this happen.
This is gotta be the best video ever.
Sweet angles, sick slow-mo,
every crazy cinematic trick
you have up your sleeve.
It's gotta be even better than
the last sick video you made for us.
- Dude, you didn't even pay me last time.
- Pete, we're burning daylight!
Let's do this. Let's make a movie.
Alright. Eddie, let them know the concept.
- Alright. We shoot
some late night antics,
including, but not limited to:
Extreme radness, excessive drinking,
damaging of public property,
insults directed at innocent people,
horribly good dancing, smart ass remarks,
invasion of personal space,
terrible rapping, drunken mumbling,
beautiful women, and overall talent
and poor decision making.
All of this, of course,
is peppered together
with hot shot stunts performed by
our world class cast of
snowboard superstars,
including Juice.
- Hey!
(laughing)
- We cut it all together,
and hope the kids shell
out their allowance for it.
- Just like back in the day.
- [Eddie] Exactly.
- Alright. Pete, set up
the first shot. Let's roll!
- I'm a great snowboarder,
you guys are jealous.
- Grab that black case, alright.
- Yeah!
- Careful with this,
that's fucking expensive.
This way, let's go to the lift dude.
(relaxed pop music)
(high energy rock music)
- Whoa, buddy!
- Hey! What the fuck!
♫ I'll take the best part of you with me
- Alright, buddy!
♫ I promise I'll lie each time we speak
♫ What you gonna do when the
world comes crashing down?
- Hey, let's use that one side angle shot
that makes the jump look even bigger,
and more ridiculous than it is.
- Sure thing, Max.
- Max, seriously, you're gonna have to
turn on some sirens if you
want me to go down that thing.
- Would you rather be making sandwiches?
- Uh, yeah.
- Come on Juice, quit
being such a little bitch.
- Come on Max, it is pretty huge.
- Let's do this.
Whoo!
(intense rock music)
(laughing)
We filmed it?
- Oh yeah, we got that.
- Record over it, man.
- We can't dude, it's film.
- Hey, hey roll Pete, roll!
(crashing snow)
(mumbling)
- Wanna try another?
- Ah, go to hell.
- Hey, hey, here goes Stacy.
(crashing snow)
- I was hoping her pants would come off!
- I was hoping she'd
land on her knees, yo!
- Did you see her ass flip over?
(laughing)
Sorry, Tracy.
- Pete, please tell me you got that.
- Have you no faith?
- Yes. Another one for the fail section.
- Max you're an asshole.
- You alright girl?
- You want me to but a little
tiger balm on that shit?
- You want a massage?
(Pete laughing)
- Pete, throw it to slow-mo.
- Sure thing.
- This one's the money.
- For sure.
(all cheering)
- That's what I'm talking about man!
First money shot of the year!
Please tell me you got that Pete.
- Actually, I ran out of film.
- What?
- You idiot!
- I'm just kidding. I got it on film.
- I knew it! I knew that. Hell yeah!
Alright, good day guys.
Chris, you are the man.
Let's go home and party!
- Whoo!
- Hey, party tonight, alright.
(relaxed guitar music)
- [Man] Hey, Eddy!
- Hey, party tonight, alright?
- [All] Max! Max! Max! Max! Max! Max!
Max! Max! Max! Max! Max!
- [Juice] Holy shit!
- Eddie, just in time dude.
Pete, did you get that?
- Yeah, I got it. Do you
think we could maybe wrap now?
- Wrap? We're just getting started.
We still got the big hot tub scene to do.
- Oh yeah, that's right. I totally gabbed.
We still have those girls coming over.
- Ladies?
- Not just any ladies.
We're talking smokin, hot,
luscious, boobs!
(metal guitar music)
- I'm in son.
Get the bottles. I get the models.
- It's okay Juice, this is
a scene with just Chris
and the girls in it.
- Whoa, whoa...
That hot tub without me is like, you know,
gin without the juice,
it ain't gonna happen.
- Sorry guys. I just got
this scene worked out in my head where
Chris comes off like a real pimp.
- Yeah!
- Money and video hoes.
Don't worry though, I'll think
of some dope shit for you guys too.
Yo Pete, you get the underwater cam?
(lid pops off)
- With the fish-eye lens.
♫ I wanna take you higher
than you've ever been
- That's how I used to do it.
♫ And I wanna show you
life that I always miss
Let me coach you in the tub,
as well as on the hill, Chris.
(girls laughing)
Take a big drink.
♫ I wanna take you higher
than you've every been
Don't be stingy with the kisses Chris.
Alright. It's like a menage a trois
love with the three of you. Yes.
♫ Dirty dancin
♫ Backwards scratchin
♫ Make it prancin
♫ Ghetto blastin
♫ Pistol wippin
♫ Hipsters trippin
♫ Skateboards rippin
♫ Flies unzippin
♫ Let me show you how in the world
♫ So simplistic
(laughing)
♫ Mental, maestro with the serves
♫ Female bodies with no shirts
♫ Hold my hammer make it swing
♫ So seductive ba-da-bing
♫ Hot with pleasure I see things
(camera clicks)
♫ Feel my horny
♫ Feed my sting
♫ I'm gonna make you scream in pain
- Man it's the last time, little weird.
Hey superstar, where you goin?
- Hey.
- Hey, what's up guys?
- We're shooting hella-boarding today.
- I'm gonna take a couple quick runs.
Max and Eddy are still asleep, so.
- Wants some company?
- Nah, nah. You chill.
But I'll be right back, okay?
- What's wrong girl?
You ain't feeling no love?
- I'm feeling just fine, thanks.
(energetic rock music)
- What up Chris-ter.
- Not much, Mr. Brown.
- No. Call me King.
- Okay.
King.
- You don't have to be nervous bra.
Not the head of the
National Snowboarding Association anymore.
I know I must have been intimidating
for you young riders.
Being in the presence of
a god-like such as myself.
But now I'm just a leading rep from
the snowboard industry.
Bringing products to
snowboarders everywhere
for the good of the sport.
- Cool.
- Way cool, dude.
And you can be part of it.
How would you like to be part of
the biggest campaign from a
new snowboard company ever?
I'm talking about a campaign focusing
on one of the most promising young riders
to ever shred, you.
- Hey, look I'm sorry man,
but I'm already hooked up here.
- TSA hooked you up, huh?
TSA hooked you up with that?
That board's not right you.
- I like this board. This...
- Maybe you'd like a
contract with more money,
more media, more exposure,
and most of all more TLC
from a guy who like riding young men.
Young men riding. Young...
Young men who ride. You know what I mean.
- Yeah.
Uh, look, I'm sorry Mr. Brown
but I ride for Max Shred, so...
- Chris-ter, Chris-ter,
a great man once said,
"One shot you got, it's a chance to blow,
"this opportunity comes
once in a lifetime."
- And who said that?
- Eminem.
- Okay.
- Think about it.
- Yeah. Sure man. Whatever.
- Late.
(snow scrapes)
- You guys bond, or what?
- He'll come around.
I think it's gonna take a little finesse.
- Sweet. Wanna hit a few runs?
- Spinks, I can't be seen
with a "snow-blader."
- Come on, King.
I promise I'll keep my
sweet aerials to a minimum.
Check this out.
Like that?
(Spinks laughing)
- Spinks, Spinks!
- I'm way better on the pipe.
- Spinks, we need to talk.
- Catch you in the hot tub.
(helicopter blades whirling)
- My brother, don't tell me
I seen them leave without us.
- Okay, I won't.
- What's going on, Eddie?
- Hey, don't hate dudes. We
could only get one chopper.
- That's bullshit man.
- Relax! It's all good.
- Whatever, let's go hit the park.
- Yo, the hell with you man.
I got some shit I wanna
try on the rails anyway.
- Hey, I'll meet you
guys back at the crib.
We're gonna film you doing
keg stands later. Whoo!
(electronic rock music)
(helicopter blades whirling)
♫ Wasted days
♫ Time's never worth saving
♫ When all you have is hate
♫ And now the drama unfolds
♫ And I'm not even scared
♫ In fact I'm looking forward
♫ To seeing you when you fail
♫ Hate for me
♫ Is all you've got
♫ Is all you've got, jealousy
♫ Hate for me
♫ Is all you've got
♫ Is all you've got, jealousy
♫ Said fallaciously
♫ We all now the truth
♫ Can't live up to your expectations
♫ As long as Heads Up crew likes our songs
♫ We don't give a fuck if you hate them
♫ So let me know
♫ When we write a song that's "crucial"
♫ Or are you too busy sitting at home
♫ Hating on bands as usual
♫ Get out your parents basement
♫ And off the hardcore message boards
♫ I'm sorry your shitty band
♫ Will never even go on tour
♫ Hate for me
♫ Is all you got
- Stop holding the camera
in the sack, buddy.
- [Pete] Alright, alright!
♫ Hate for me
(mumbles)
♫ Is all you've got
♫ Is all you've got, jealousy
- [Max] Pan with him. Yeah!
- Nice.
- That's my style.
- [Eddy] Dude, I knew I'd find you here.
- This is my second office.
- A home away from home.
- Tina! A glass for the Yeti.
So, what's up man.
- Wanna hear the good
news, or the better news?
- Start with the good news.
- Good choice.
I don't know if you heard,
but we got a ton of people
signing up for camp.
- Oh yeah? Cheers to that.
(glasses clink)
- All types of randoms man.
We got some kids, couple chicks,
some old geezers. Some
of them can even shred.
- Well bring 'em on.
And remember, it's 25
bucks just to try out,
with no guarantee they get in.
- Totally.
- Get the cash up front, too.
This sport attracts a
lot of sketchy characters
with highly questionable morals.
(scoffs)
- Dirt bags.
- Exactly.
So, what's that better news.
- I found this big bag of weed
downstairs in the lockers.
- Oh shit.
- You wanna go home and smoke it?
- Yeah, man. I'll meet you
there in like half a pitcher.
- It's almost 4:20.
- I know what that means.
- Golden Girls is on. Gotta go.
- Later bro.
- Hey. We're back, right?
- We're back.
(glasses clink)
(rock music)
(sexual rock music)
♫ Now that we've met
- Nice moves.
♫ And you know my name
- Uh, thanks.
- I would love to try that someday.
- Have you ever been snowboarding?
- No. I ski, and badly.
(laughing)
In fact, I've never even been on a board.
- You should try, it's pretty easy.
- I'm afraid of falling too much on my--
(sexual rock music)
I don't want to hurt it.
- Yeah, me neither. I mean--
Uh, yeah.
You should take some lessons or something.
- Yeah, maybe. If I can
find the right teacher.
- Well, they have a pretty good
lesson program on this mountain.
- Well, I kind of was
hoping for a private lesson.
- That'll also work, yeah.
- Well, maybe I'll see you around.
- Okay.
(relaxed hip hop music)
- Hey guys, how's it goin?
Where's the Yeti.
(steam hissing)
- Whoa, dude.
- Oh, there you are man.
How come you're not wearing a shirt?
- Jamaican dishwasher
man, you know the rules,
no shirts allowed, bro or
chick. Equal rights, dude.
- Yes! I win again.
- Yo, Chris, I was
distracted by those fools.
You know what I'm saying?
- Pay up.
- Once again, my people being exploited
by the white man, you're
all in this together.
K, K, K.
- Hey, don't sweat it Juice.
Tomorrow you'll all be
making some extra paper.
- Wicked. How can I be down?
- Eddy, it was your idea.
- Must have been before
the Jamaican dishwasher.
- Eddy, you're a fuckin scientist.
Let me refresh your burnt brain.
Now, we have a sizeable list of kids
signing up for the new camp tryouts.
We don't got enough time
to check them all out.
We were thinking, maybe you
guys take over the tryouts,
we'll split the registration fee with ya,
and it'll be a good way to give
something back to the sport.
I mean, look what it's
done for Eddy and me.
(air whirling)
- Ow.
(phone ringing)
- Hey, Danielle? Yeah.
Alright, I'll be right over.
Alright, we'll talk to you guys tomorrow.
Eddy let's go, let's
let them get some rest.
- Just one more load.
(Danielle laughing)
- Let's see, hot boozy
breath on the back of my neck
and shaky hands, must be Max.
- Hey, could've been Kingsley
trying to get back with you.
- Ah, he quit drinking.
- Spinks says he swallows.
(laughing)
- That's disgusting.
- Don't tell me, tell Kingsley.
- You can tell him yourself, he's back.
- I heard.
- Did you hear he's repping
Tomahawk boards now?
- Yeah, so what?
- And he's looking for
a new marquee rider?
- Let him look.
- At Chris?
- I'm not worried.
- Well, I am. If we lose him,
that is a huge hole in my profile.
My bosses would not be happy.
- Relax. Chris wouldn't
leave us, he loves us.
- Okay.
(rap music)
- These guys are fucked.
Up for some arts and crafts?
- Facials?
- All around.
Thanks for coming with me,
I've had my heart set on a latte all day.
- Oh, no worries.
It's good to get a break from Max's video.
I think a bunch of people
from his old crew are coming over later
to smash bottles on their heads.
- Max's video? I thought
it was your video?
- I don't know what it is anymore.
I mean, Max keeps telling me
it's gonna make me a star,
but I don't know. I just wanna compete
and, you know, get better.
- Well, you will. I don't doubt that.
- Thanks.
- Do you want anything?
- No, I'm good.
- Okay. I'll be right back.
- Okay.
- Hi there.
- Hey. What's up?
- Nothing much, I'm just
heading back to my hotel.
But I'm afraid I've lost my bearings.
Do you know where the Sierra Lodge is?
- Uh, yeah, yeah. It's just
to the right over there.
- Do you think that you could walk me?
- Yeah, sure.
- [Lisa] Your girlfriend?
- No. Just a teammate.
- Well, I promise I won't keep you.
You're shaking. Are you cold?
- No. I mean, I'm just...
You know what, I guess
I'm just really nervous.
Maybe it's cause you're like
the hottest girl I've ever met.
- Please.
(laughs shyly)
You probably have all
these girls after you.
I mean, I've seen them following you.
- Hey, what about you?
Do you have, like, a
boyfriend or anything?
- Maybe.
So, do you wanna come in?
- No. I should get back
'cause my friend's probably
looking for me by now.
Oh.
(phone ringing)
Yeah?
- Hey, Chris. Where'd you go?
- I just ran in to someone.
- Okay. Well, tell me where you are,
I'll come meet you.
- You now what, I'll meet
you back at the chalet.
I'm just gonna hang out for a bit.
Is that cool?
- Yeah. Okay. Cool.
Bye.
[Chris] See ya.
(relaxed guitar music)
- [Max] So when ya coming back?
- Depends on how the meetings go.
Europe is a big market in snowboarding
and we need to get established there.
- I'll miss you.
- I will be home soon
and you'll be fine with Eddy.
Although, watch him because he's been
acting very strange lately.
- Oh. He just got his hands
on some really good weed.
- Well, that would explain it.
- Ah. Now, listen, I have
put together a portfolio
of TSA's new campaign for the team.
And can you be sure to get each
of the riders to sign their new contract?
I've marked where they need to sign.
Late getting back from legal.
- Yeah. No worries. I'll
take care of everything.
Fear not.
- Okay.
- Aw shit...
(paper rustling)
it's good.
(mumbling)
Awesome.
- Just make yourself at home.
- This place is pretty nice.
- Yeah! The company pays for it.
If I was here on vacation, I
would get something smaller.
Something, cozier.
- So, what is it that you do?
- I work in the snowboard
industry in public relations.
- Oh, that's sweet. We're
like in the same business.
I mean, sort of.
- Yeah, but let's not
talk business tonight.
It's been such a long day.
- Tell me about it. It's all
my coaches wanna talk about.
The deal, the video, the money.
- There are other things in life.
How about you sit and relax,
and I will go order us some drinks?
(rap music)
♫ And I will never forget the
days that we had, the regrets
(energetic rock music)
- What's up guys?
- Juice, you grab her
legs, I got her arms.
- Alright then, looks like all
the work's been done for us.
- All you have to do is
worry about the team.
- What's there to worry about?
- The team is the cornerstone
of everything TSA's doing in snowboarding.
Without the team we don't
have a presence in this sport.
Please don't screw this up.
- When have I ever screwed up?
Point taken.
- I'm not leaving this minute, Max.
My flight's not 'til tomorrow morning.
- Well then, looks like we
got a long night ahead of us.
- Which means it will be
over 20 minutes from now
with you drooling on my chest.
- Can you blame me for
drooling over this chest?
(scoffs)
- Gee, thanks.
- Can't believe you're gonna miss
Max and Eddy's first
big party of the year.
- I love it when you talk
about yourself in the third person.
- So does Max.
(laughing)
- Let's go.
- I'm not really big on this stuff.
- You need to learn how to relax.
I can show you how,
and then you can teach
me how to snowboard.
- Okay. It's a deal.
(laughing)
(glasses clinking)
♫ Yo, it's the beauty that's perceived
♫ In the eye of the beholder
♫ But a girl that will make you
♫ turn your head around your shoulder
♫ Just to cath a little glimpse
♫ Of an angel that descended from heaven
♫ just to pinch me out of my dreams
♫ Stayed awake. Could it be fate?
- Sorry.
♫ Instant attraction the
moment that I met you
♫ With palpitations of
my heart beating faster
♫ At the stare of her eyes
and the sound of her laughter
♫ Just a soft touch
- You like what you see?
- Yeah. Definitely.
- So do I.
♫ So this is something
that I wrote for you
♫ Yo what is love
♫ What is it's meaning to you
♫ The feeling so true
♫ The power to change gray to blue
♫ And what is love
♫ Yo, when it feels so right
♫ And all you wanna do is hold her tight
♫ And never let go
♫ Let go, let go
♫ Let go, let go
♫ And never let go
- What?
- I made it.
(laughing)
- Not yet.
♫ My stomach's weak with the desire
♫ To let my true feelings free
♫ I can't do it
♫ It makes me feel to vulnerable
♫ This horrible ain't it
♫ That I wanna tell you I love you
♫ But I can't say it
♫ I mean, what if it changes
♫ Everything about us I know
♫ What if I tell I love you
♫ And you're like, "I gotta go"
♫ That'd be messed up, right?
♫ Yo, what if I just told you
♫ I like you a whole lot
♫ Would that be alright?
- Late night, huh?
- Yeah. I was just chillin.
How 'bout you?
- The usual.
- Yeah.
(Chris laughing)
(relaxed guitar music)
- Where's Max and Chris?
- Danielle has them doing some interviews.
We're gonna meet them later
at the press conference.
Here comes our talent.
(techno rock music)
- Okay. You're playing us, right?
- Why you trippin' Juice?
You promised a lesson
to anyone who tried out.
Remember, it's all about giving back.
(camera clicks)
- [Mikey] Yo, this way if
some bitch steps up like,
"What," in my face I could reach,
I got full mobility, you know what I mean.
- Mikey, take that shit off man,
you look like a fool.
- It's comfortable.
- [K-Dog] Be professional.
- Off my back!
- Hey, where's Chris?
- Chris? I think he's gonna be
a little late this morning dogs.
He was, like, totally nacker.
- He was out partying?
- Chris? He doesn't drink.
- Maybe he got...
(sexual rock music)
some.
♫ Now that we met
- Damn.
♫ And you know my name
♫ Yeah trouble baby
♫ But I'm not to plain
♫ Cause it takes two wrongs
- Sup, guys. This is Lisa.
Lisa, this is my crew.
We got Pete the Filmer, this is Mikey,
Max, Eddy, and K-Dog.
- I've heard so much about you,
Chris has said a lot.
- Oh yeah? Did he tell
you my girlfriend's away?
- Did he tell you I like pouring
chocolate sauce on women,
and then licking it off
while they watch old
snowboard videos of mine?
- No. He didn't.
- Damn, girl. Haven't we met before.
- K-K-K-Dog! Lisa, Lisa's
my girl. Alright, guys?
Alright, let's just get started.
Chris, this is the scene where we do
a little Chris-mania action.
You're gonna get chased by a horde
of screaming teenagers
with only your board to fend them off.
It's like a take on Beetle-mania,
except they didn't snowboard.
- Alright, that's cool.
I like the Beatles.
- Great. Here's how it's gonna work,
when I give Mikey over there the signal...
- Holla!
- He's gonna send the girls running,
and then you just start backing up
and swinging your board to keep them
from ripping your clothes off.
- Why would he do that?
- 'Cause he doesn't want
them to rip his clothes off.
- Why not?
- 'Cause he's here in the
middle of the village.
- Everyone's gonna think he's gay.
- It's just a scene, it's
supposed to be funny.
- Well it's not gonna be funny for Chris
when everyone starts calling him faggot.
Like, "Hey faggot."
- Dude, no one called the Beatles faggots.
- How do you know?
- Hey man, I'm the director.
We're gonna do it my way, it's my vision.
Here's how it's gonna work.
When I give Mikey the signal...
- Go, go, go, go, go, go, go!
(uptempo rock music)
- Damn girl, you have
got some great titties.
- Aw, fuck off!
- Chris!
Guys get off of him!
- [Max] Looks like Chris-mania
got the best of you buddy!
- Ladies and gentlemen,
on behalf of Team Max Shred,
it is my distinct pleasure to
introduce our latest sponsor,
the greatest energy drink ever,
and the greatest spokesman ever,
Chris James!
(audience cheering)
- Come on up here Team Max Shred!
- [All] We want Max
Shred! We want Max Shred!
- Alright, Chris! You
guys, come on, get up here!
Tracy! Let's get up here to take a photo.
Juice, get up here man.
(cameras clicking)
- Hey!
- Oh! Oh! Yeah!
(water splashing)
- Yo, this is gangster man.
Specially after such a fucked up day.
- Aw, no doubt kid, for real my nig--
Dude.
Yo, filming parts is tiring.
- Yo, all we need is a couple
freaks to hit that shit up!
(laughing)
Black power.
- Yeah. Black power.
- Room for one more?
- Oh, you know it. Hop in girl.
- Ooh.
- Girl, you so hot you're gonna
make that water boil over.
- Stop.
(breathing deeply)
Thank you.
(water splashing)
- Yo, little freaky white
boy, get out of here, man.
(mumbling)
- Yo, I'm just fishing for clams dog.
- Out.
- Yeah, whatever.
- Yo, yo K-Dog, go get you (mumbling)
'cause you need some relief boy.
- Alright, alright.
- You're cool?
- Yeah. Why not?
I'm in a hot tub, in a luxury
chalet in the mountains,
being held as a celebrity
for doing what I love.
It's all good.
- It ain't all good. Max has
been playing us for fools.
You see what he got going on with Chris.
It's all about him.
We're like the gravy on
the turkey, a big turkey.
- Don't call Chris a turkey,
it not his fault, he's just
overwhelmed by everything
that's happened to us.
You know. It's not his fault
he's so talented either,
he's a good guy. He's just a...
(sexual rock music)
bastard.
- Hey. Tracy, Juice,
I'd like you to meet my,
my friend, Lisa.
- It's a pleasure.
- The pleasure is all mine.
So, Lisa, tell me,
what brings you to this slice of paradise?
- I work for a snowboarding
rep, it's a dream job.
- For real?
- Yes. Lots of travel, great hotels,
really nice people,
and the best part of it
is that I get to meet people like Chris.
He's such an awesome guy.
- Awesome.
- Like, totally awesome.
- I know it's kind of soon and all but,
I don't know we just get
such a strong vibe together.
It's almost spiritual.
- Lust?
- Yeah. That too, he's a tiger.
He's been wearing me out.
- Okay.
- Hey, Tracy if you're coming back
could you grab us a couple coldies.
- I don't think she's coming back man.
(sensual music)
(heavy breathing)
- Wow.
It feels like I've been
hiking the pipe all day.
- Come on, you're like
a professional athlete.
I should be the tired one.
I've been riding your super pipe all day.
- Yeah. Well, let's
just say team Max Shred
isn't exactly up at the
crack of dawn training.
- Obviously.
- What is that supposed to mean?
I beat my old record back
there by like 13 seconds.
- I know, and you did a great job.
I'm just wondering, don't
you guys ever train,
you know, off the snow?
- No. Max and Eddy don't
really believe in that.
They're always saying, you know,
"Either you got it, or you don't."
Lifting weights is just gonna
make your jacket fit tighter.
(laughing)
- Yeah. But, don't you
guys think about injuries
or conditioning and stuff?
- What do you know about conditioning?
- My boss was telling me about it.
- Who's your boss?
- I don't know if you've
heard of him, Kingsley Brown.
- What? That douche bag?
- Douche bag? Says who?
- I don't know. My coaches
just have a history with him.
- Well, the Kingsley Brown that I know,
is a really great boss.
Anyway, he was saying that,
"I'm more concerned with
for my riders' health
"rather than any video,
or competition results."
It sounded good to me.
Mr. Pro-rider.
Are you ready for another round?
- I don't know if I have
any fluids left in my body.
But, let's give it a try.
- [Announcer] Welcome to
the Silver Star Rail Jam,
where the best of the
best rip the baddest,
raddest rails this side of the Rockies.
- It's like we ain't even a team no more.
First Max and Eddy make him
out like someone special,
better than us, then this freak ass
groupie bitch is all over him.
Where's my freak ass groupie bitch?
- Don't sweat it Juice,
we just gotta ride.
And that's all that matters.
- Oh, that's what I'm saying.
I wanna ride, a freak ass groupie bitch.
What?
(uptempo rock music)
(crowd yelling)
- You guys are gonna remember this night,
the night Chris James lives up to the hype
and proves he is the future of this sport.
Hey, and be sure to stop
by our crib tomorrow night.
We're gonna have the
teaser for our new video,
featuring some of the hottest talent
this sport has to offer.
- [Announcer] Next up,
we got Tracy Alexander
ready to rock the rails.
She's part of Team Max Shred
and they're poised to
take over this sport.
Alright, ladies and
gentlemen give it up for
Tracy Alexander.
- Yeah, Tracy!
- [Announcer] Alright,
next to drop is rider 113,
Daryl "The Juice" Clark
from Team Max Shred.
Looking so good on this first rail.
- Dude, the Juice is good.
- [Announcer] They are the
top of the snowboarding world.
- Did you hear that? Did you
get that? What he's saying?
(crowd cheering)
- [Announcer] Alright, now
rider 114, Chris James.
He's been killing it in
the pipe all season long.
Let's see what he has
on the rails on course.
(crowd yelling)
(crowd booing)
(upbeat rock music)
- Yeah!
- [Announcer] Tracy Alexander
doing her thing on the bar.
Ladies and gentlemen, give
it up for Tracy Alexander,
for Team Max Shred!
(Tracy laughing)
- Prepare to be amazed baby.
- [Announcer] Next up,
for his last run is Juice.
Ready to drop in, this crowd
absolutely loves this guy.
(crowd cheering)
Juice Clark does not disappoint
with the sick invert for Team Max Shred.
Their coaches have got to
be proud of them right now.
- Of course I am, I made them didn't I?
Hey, here comes Chris. Check this out.
- [Announcer] Chris
James. Looking to make up
for a rare slip up here in his final run.
(crowd yelling)
- [Announcer] But there
has to be a consolation
in the big win by Juice
Clark in the men's open.
- Hey, everybody has an off night.
I've bailed in a big comp once.
- Yeah. Right after he
smoked this huge spliff.
It was bigger than this.
(camera clicks)
- Hey dude, put that away man.
We gotta go talk to Chris.
- See ya at the video teaser.
- That's right. Hey, Max.
- [Eddy] One sec guys.
- Dude, what happened?
- You saw it. What do you want me to say?
- We're supposed to be showcasing
the brand, not sucking.
- Hey! Give him a break, he did his best.
- You stay out of it! I'm his coach.
Maybe if you two weren't so busy
trying to set the world humping record.
Chris would stand a chance.
- Screw you, you old fart.
- I'd rather you screw me,
then maybe he'd do better.
- Chill out Max, alright.
Maybe if you weren't
running me around so hard.
I mean, between the media
and the photo shoots,
and the video, man I'm tired.
- We'll talk later man.
That is unless you end up
setting the record tonight.
- In case you're wondering,
the record, I hold it.
Just wanted to say, good luck.
- You know, I'm worried
about your situation Chris.
And I have somebody that I
think you should talk to.
- Lisa, look, I think I know
where you're going with this.
- And are you against it?
- Yeah, maybe not.
- Chris! What a surprise.
How are ya this evening? Come here.
Let's shoot the shop with
ya for a second, okay?
Let me rap a little bit.
- Yeah, sure.
- Are you happy with
your coaching situation?
- Yeah. Yeah, sure. I mean--
- You don't sound too
convincing there, Chris.
Here's the way I see it,
looks like a couple of old pros
who are so excited to be back in the game
that they're willing to
do anything to pimp out
their number one prospect,
I mean pimp him out raw.
Bet you haven't been
- Yeah.
- doing a lot of practicing lately, huh?
- No, not really.
- That's what I thought.
Listen, it's Max and
Eddy. It's Max and Eddy.
You know, we go way back.
I'm sure they told you that, right?
Oh yeah, yeah. We were compadres, man,
compadres.
- Really?
- Yeah. They're great guys,
but they don't know how
to run a snowboard team.
They teach camp, they
don't manage careers.
- Yeah. I guess but,
I mean, they're trying.
- Chris, you're a loyal guy, I like that.
I like that about you.
But sometimes you need to
do what's right for you.
We got a crack team here man.
With Lisa doing the PR,
we'll be all over the map.
- And think about it Chris,
you and me traveling the world.
- She'd do anything for ya, anything.
- Of course I would, I love him.
- Talking, like, the things
people do when they're in love.
You know what I'm saying.
- You know what, Kingsley?
Sign me up.
- Let's go get a drink.
(relaxed hip hop music)
- Mikey, man, I'm over being
Max's bitch for this video.
You know, if I practice
enough I still got a chance.
Yo, I just gotta stomp that 180,
then Max would let me
on the tizzeam fo' sho.
- Dude, I know you could stomp that shit.
It's just a matter of confidence.
You just gotta rip it, yo.
Yeah boy.
(laughing)
- Hey, what's up guys?
- [K-Dog] Just chillin'.
- [Mikey] Sup.
- You guys shredding today?
- Gonna slay this bad boy run right here.
- Yeah, cool.
Okay, Lisa. This is the
easiest run on the mountain.
You ready for it?
- I think so.
- Alright.
- So long, boys.
- Chia late.
Easiest? Kid, this run is gangsta.
- Sick!
- Man, Chris hit the lotto.
(mumbling)
- Yo, yo, yo, yo. I feel like I know her.
- Dude, bitches that hot do not
talk to your stupid ass.
- Do too.
- [Mikey] No. No, no.
- If I stick this 180 they will.
Move aside, son.
West side!
(snow crashing)
- Bail!
(laughing)
(mumbling)
- Alright, you guys, we
gotta kill this for Max,
and then let's give him some Trouble.
One, two, three.
(crowd cheering)
♫ I set you off
♫ I set you off
♫ Lie if you want
♫ I get you off, baby
♫ I'm no good, I'm no good
♫ What's so good?
♫ Take one thing that you're lookin' for
♫ Take ten more and I gotta be sure
- There's Max.
- This is huge.
- I know.
- People are so stoked
to see our video teaser.
- We're all stoke to see it,
we haven't seen any of it yet.
- Trust me, it's mint.
- Yo, this shit, this shit right here,
is gonna be off the hizzle
dizzle, you naw mean?
We're gonna go down in the histo--
(phone rings)
- Oh, hold up. Must be Mikey.
Mikey C., what's up?
Ma, I told you not to call me.
Yeah. No, you're cramping my st--
Yes, I did do the lau--
Yo, okay I'm--
He-, hello?
Goddamn it.
(closes phone)
Yo, I gotta...
- It's cool. It's cool.
- I gotta bounce.
- Yeah. Thanks for coming.
- Yeah. Let me know how it goes, aight?
♫ You set me off, baby
- So, where's Chris anyway.
- Juice went to go get him.
He's been with you know who, so.
He's slaying him to get his ass over here.
(knocking on door)
- Chris! I know you're in there.
Hi five.
(hands slap)
(laughing)
Double high five!
I tried. Hey!
(door slams)
♫ What you think baby?
No, you can't hate me
♫ I get you off, I make you soft
♫ I take you off, the life I want, baby
(crowd cheering)
- Alright. Everyone, back in the day,
it was all about videos.
And we pioneered that shit.
(crowd cheering)
And here we are, back where we belong.
There he is! Chris! Alright, man!
- Hey, Max.
- You ready for super stardom?
Alright, before we watch the teaser,
I just wanna thank everyone
who helped make it.
Pete! Best filmer ever.
(crowd cheering)
My girl, Danielle, who
made it all possible.
May man, Eddy.
(crowd cheering)
My best friend. And of course, my team.
What a great group of kids.
(mumbling)
And last, but the opposite of least,
Chris James! Give it up!
(crowd cheering)
- What? He's a team?
(Tracy scoffs)
But, seriously?
- It's ridiculous.
- Alright! Roll it!
(crowd cheering)
- This is my world. Welcome to it.
(rock music)
(crowd cheering)
(audience laughing)
- [All] Yeah!
- Wow, I told you.
(crowd cheering)
- Yeah! You see that shit! Give it up!
Yeah! Chris, get up here man.
- Nah.
(Max scoffs)
- Ha! Can you believe it, man?
So talented, yet so shy. Aw shit.
There he is, my numero uno all-star.
They loved it, man. What'd you think?
- It was good, but does it
need to be centered on me?
- The other riders were in there,
you just stand out like Eddy's potbelly
in any shirt smaller than an extra large.
- Right. Hey, listen Max,
I gotta talk to you about something.
- Sequels? Yeah, I know man.
These things are gonna
fly off the shelves.
We start filming next week.
- Right, right, but,
listen, I made a decision.
- To do some shots?
Eddy, tequila!
Oh, the good stuff.
- A couple of these and
I'll be fucking good.
- Yeah you will. Hook us up.
Give you those, ha. Here's
to the latest and greatest.
- Max, I'm leaving the team.
(spits)
- My retinas!
- [Max] What?!
- I'm sorry you guys. You
know you guys are my friends,
but I just, I think I need
something different right now.
- So we'll set you up
on some different gear.
- No man, it's not
that. It's the coaching,
I signed up with Kingsley Brown.
- Kingsley Brown?
Please tell me there's another
Kingsley Brown around town these days.
- Man, I'm sorry.
- I think I'm gonna throw up.
- Kingsley makes me sick too, man.
- No, man. It's the tequila.
- It's nothing personal you guys I just,
I gotta go. I'm sorry you guys.
- Aw, this is bad.
- I know. My eyes are burning.
- Focus, Eddy. We just
lost the face of our team.
We gotta go tell the others.
- Oh, watch your dick.
- Guys, no need to panic here,
but we just lost Chris.
- Yeah, we know. He told us an hour ago.
- He told you first?
- Yeah. Hard to believe we came first
in something, ain't it?
- Yeah.
- What are you guys talking about?
- Come on, Max. You've been blowing us off
for a while now. I mean,
look at that video,
we're like extras or something.
Chris is amazing and
he deserves the credit,
but we're on the A team too.
To you guys we're like, the C team.
- I hear what you're saying.
When we make the sequel we'll just--
- Max, you ain't listening.
Ain't gonna be no sequel, not for us.
- I don't like where this is going.
Eddy, help me out here.
- Body shots?
- Thanks buddy.
Guys, tell me you're not
thinking what I think you're thinking.
- Sorry Max. I know this is
bad timing but we're through.
- Juice?
- Dog. I'm done, son.
- Hello?
Is anyone home?
Max?
(somber music)
Well, at least nothing's changed.
Max?
- Oh, hey baby. How was your trip?
Give me a kiss.
- Look at you.
I thought you guys were
over this kind of thing--
Well, not him, but you Max.
I mean, do you know what time it is?
You should be out with the team,
I left you with a full itinerary.
- We had a rough night.
(Danielle scoffs)
- Well, I can see that. Come
on let's go, we got work to do.
- Actually, we don't.
- What?
- Chris, the rest of them, they quit
just after the video release.
- Why?
- I'm not sure.
Chris went to the dark side.
- Kingsley?
- Yep.
- But he can't. He signed a contract.
Right? He signed...
Max, don't tell me...
- Okay.
- You didn't get the
fucking contract signed!
- We were busy with the video
and all the media and--
- And, and, partying.
- A little.
(Danielle scoffs)
- Do you have any idea what this means?
I could lose my job. If TSA doesn't have
a team in the super comp, I'm fucked.
Do you understand? Fucked. And so are you.
- I didn't know they were gonna bolt.
We had this trust thing
happening. Those ingrates!
After all I've done for them.
So I give Chris a little
too much attention.
- Oh, I warned you about that.
- Yeah. You also warned me not to
bone other girls while you were gone,
but did I listen?
Yes! Of course I did.
Hey, where you goin'? Danielle?
Wait, it's all good--
- No, Max. No, it's not
all good, we're not all good.
- What are you saying?
- I'm saying what I should have said
before I got back together with you.
Fuck off.
- You don't mean it. Come give me a hug.
- You're pathetic.
- Dude, you gotta love a girl with balls.
- She'll be back.
(floor thuds)
(Max farts)
- [Kingsley] Well, well, well.
Looks like the tables have turned, Max.
- Why? Do you like vaginas now?
- What's he talking about, King?
- Shut up Spinks.
Joke all you want Max.
Won't change the fact
that I've just taken your best talent
from right under your nose.
(Spinks laughing)
No come back, eh?
Must hurt a little bit
finding that once again,
I'm on top.
- The King always
ends up on top.
- Quiet time, Spinks.
- I don't know exactly what you did,
but I'm gonna figure it out.
- What I did?
I out-managed you, Max. And it was easy.
I hear you lost the rest
of your team as well.
Bonus.
(laughing)
I'd be a lot happier if I cared
about recruiting marginal talent.
- [Max] You son of a bitch!
Motherfucker I'll kill you!
- [Spinks] Get your
hands off of him! Security!
Security! Come on!
- Get him off me, get him--
(Max screaming)
Get this guy to a drunk tank.
I think he might be high on PCP.
He probably sells it to kids!
- [Max] Let go of me!
- You know what that does to kids!
- It's over Kingsley! You're done!
I'm not playing anymore! I'm
gonna punch you in the larynx!
Or, stab you in your retinas!
I'd kick you in the adam's
apple if I thought you had one!
Get the fuck off me!
- [Kingsley] Have fun in oblivion,
you fucking shit head.
(knocking on door)
- [Max] Can I help you?
Oh, you communicate by notes.
- Hey, man. What's up with the mutes?
- Oh, fucking great! We're being evicted.
- When did we become poor again?
- TSA paid for this place,
they want us out of here.
Come on in, boys. Thanks
for stealing my stuff
without letting me do a thing about it.
- There's some guacamole in the fridge,
and if you guys wanna hot tub
you're gonna have to share a towel.
- [Max] Well Eddy, looks like we're back
to living in the truck.
(engine revving)
- Nope.
- Why not?
Don't tell me you've
gotten all high and mighty.
You can't rough it anymore?
- Oh, I'd live in it if it
wasn't being towed right now.
- Beautiful. I'm gonna
go find a McDonald's
and see if I can get some shifts in.
- Nah. I got an idea. We
still got some money left.
I know a perfect place to stay.
- Alright.
- [Eddy] Not too shabby, right?
And I hear it's a great
place to pick up chicks.
- Yeah, well, that's not
really important right now.
We just need to get some rest.
We're down right now man,
we need all the energy we can get.
Tomorrow, we put our lives back together.
- Well, this is the place.
Apparently it's quite peaceful.
They give you hot water bottles,
warm glasses of milk.
We'll be asleep in no time.
- Sweet.
- [All] Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!
(intense rock music)
(Max screaming)
- [Max] Remember, we're
gonna walk in there
with our heads held high.
- [Eddy] My head's always high.
- [Max] Yeah, that's part of our problem.
- Yo, Max, I just, I wanna thank you
for letting me and Mikey
on the team, you know.
- Yo, yo, my brothas. I swear
to God we will not disappoint.
- Yeah you will, because you
guys can't ride worth a shit.
But we're gonna have a team
in the super comp no matter what.
So, let's hit this opening party
and show 'em who we are.
- Word.
- Let's get naked.
- Let's do this, Eddy.
- Hey. How's it goin?
- [Woman] Good to see you.
- Good to see you.
Hey. Can I buy you a drink?
- I'm already drunk, I think.
- I just wanted to say I was sorry.
For fucking up your whole deal.
I know you worked really hard to get here.
- Nah, don't worry about it.
I was thinking of going
into real estate anyway.
I think I'd be pretty good at it.
- Well, well, well, well, well,
well, it's the love birds.
What's the matter? Love on the rocks?
Looks like Danielle's had
a little too much scotch
on the rocks, huh?
(laughing)
- Oh, King! You kill me
man, that was a good one.
- Watch your mouth, King-shit!
- Back off Max. I don't wanna
have to kick your ass again.
- Whatever.
(Spinks scoffs)
Good luck Danielle.
- Thanks, Max.
- Easy. Easy, easy. It
ain't worth it, King.
Relax, it's okay.
(Kingsley laughing)
- [Max] Mikey, K-Dog, let's cruise dude,
we're out of here. This
party's fucking bullshit.
Eddy let's just go dude.
- Fuck this party, yo!
(mumbling)
- Do you mind if I see you naked?
- Fuck off
- Get the fuck out of here, K-Dog.
- Sorry dog, I'm curious.
(techno music)
Yo, yo, yo, my boys!
You hungry? I found
some pizza in the trash.
- No I'm cool, I just need some sleep.
- It's all good.
I'm just glad to be on
the tizzeam, you know.
It's too bad Chris is off it,
me and Mikey boy knew he'd make the cut.
Kid went and bought himself
a porn star girlfriend!
- Yeah, Lisa's hot man.
I don't know about porn star hot though.
- How could a porn star
not be porn star hot?
That doesn't--
- He's dating Lisa, she's in PR, not porn.
- Yeah, stage name Veronica Vixen.
I knew I knew that girl from somewhere,
so me and Mikey went home,
check our stats, sure
enough, bang! There she was!
- Oh yeah. Super Sluts, issue 243.
Boom!
- Two, four, three.
- No way.
- Yo, I knew that indexing
would pay off man.
I must have pulled it a
million times to that girl.
- Chris is dating a super slut?
That man is god.
- Nah, Eddy. It just doesn't add up man.
Why would Veronica Vixen be
doing PR work for Kingsley?
Oh, fuck!
I knew that mother-felter
was up to something!
- Yo, let's to tell Chris.
- No, dude, leave him alone. He's happy.
Besides, ignorance is
bliss. You should know that.
- Yeah.
- [Mikey] Yeah son!
- [Both] Whoo!
(hands clap)
(clear throat)
- Are you guys done
with that magazine?
(relaxed scat music)
- [Mikey] Aw shit man,
Max isn't gonna like this.
- [Eddy] I told you.
This is operation Yeti.
Yeti is team leader. Leader por tu.
- [Both] Yeti!
- [Eddy] Alright, this is his floor.
Clearly you guys don't remember this shit.
Alright, follow my leader.
(fast paced bongo music)
Okay, this is the room.
Stick it under the door.
(knocking on door)
♫ So classic, it was
perfect as it needed to be
♫ It was back when
friends were true homies
♫ Drinking 40's with few worries
- Veronica Vixen?
- What's up, baby? Oh shit!
- What the fuck is this, Lisa? Veronic--
whatever the fuck your name is.
- Sorry, Chris. It's just business.
- Business?
Look, what are you talking about?
- Hey, you're a good kid,
I don't wanna hurt you,
but I have to make a living,
just like everybody else.
- I don't get it, you said...
- Look, it wasn't my idea.
- Somebody put you up to this?
- Kingsley Brown hired me. He wanted me
to get you away from Max
and whatever sponsors you were with.
It was easy money.
- Yeah, it was easy.
Easy for you.
- Yeah. Actually, it was
I had a good time. You're a nice kid.
Anyway, I'm just gonna go grab my stuff.
Awkward.
(rap music)
(door slams)
- [Announcer] Just a
reminder that the train runs
for the updown super comp--
- Hey, what's up?
- Not much.
- I heard about Lisa. Sorry.
- Yeah, it was really my fault, I mean,
I just, I'm such an idiot.
I really though it was real.
- Well, it was. For you.
And I hope it happens again.
I mean, no other porn star or whatev--
(laughing)
- Yeah, so do I.
- Well, good luck today.
- Thanks.
- Okay.
- [Announcer] Welcome to
the updown super comp.
(rock music)
- Little cousin.
- [K-Dog] Aw yeah!
- I'm glad you finally made it, man.
- Hey, it's only the beginning my brother.
Only the beginning.
- Good luck, man.
- Thanks, dog.
Alright.
(snow crashing)
- [Announcer] Here comes a renegade from
Team Max Shred, Juice
Clark on that first rail.
And Juice Clark goes down with the bail!
Could it be just the jitters,
or is it a lack of coaching?
Let's check in on the slopes south comp.
- Mikey, you nervous?
- Hell no, hoe. Max got me
all jacked up for this shit.
- Max used to get us really pumped.
- Yo, I'll see you on the podium, girl.
(upbeat techno music)
- Nice try.
- [Radio] This guy sucks!
Send the next competitor.
- [Announcer] Let's to back to the top
where another Max Shred exile
is about to drop in, Tracy Alexander.
She comes in to that first rail.
She's so good, Tracy Alexander.
Not what you'd expect
from Tracy Alexander,
but like Juice Clark this could be
just getting used to a lack of coaching.
Alright, ladies and gentlemen
we're gonna go to the judges--
- Max! Eddy!
- Danielle, what's up?
Did I wreck something with the chalet?
Was it that vase?
It was Eddy's idea to play indoor cricket.
- Hey. Don't be pissed 'cause
I scored 14 wickets on you.
- Okay. No, no, no. Max, you know
I need to enter a team
into the competition
and it has to have someone with a name.
- All the names are sponsored.
Looks like you're getting fired.
- No, no. I'm not getting fired
because I have thought of somebody.
- Who?
- You!
- Are you high?
- No, Max.
It'll draw attention to the brand,
I mean, you won't win,
but as long as you
compete I'm off the hook.
And you kind of owe me big time.
- You know he's like 136 years old, right?
- Come on, Max. Just do it for those kids.
They need you now. Show
them what this team
is really about. You're
the great Max Fisher,
the innovator, the veteran.
You could still show
these kids a thing or two.
- As the principle at their high school.
- Come on!
- Alright, I'm in.
- Hey, hey!
- Danielle, grab my board.
- Okay.
- Eddy, grab me a beer.
(electronic music)
(Kingsley whistling)
- Chris-ter? Ready to shreddy?
- Are you kidding me?
- I don't kid about snowboarding.
This ain't about fun, son.
This is about winning,
and that's exactly what
you're about to do.
- Aw, man. That just gave me chills, man.
- I tell it like it is.
- Then why don't you tell me about Lisa?
- She's a wonderful woman,
you're a lucky man.
- Yeah. Me and every other pervert
that's ever jerked off on her pictures.
- What?
Where'd you get that?
- Yeah. Who's the rat?
- Spinks!
- You know what, there's
only two rats here
and I'm looking at them.
Fuck this, I'm out of here.
- I told you that girl was a dirty bitch.
Filthy little whore.
God, she pisses me off. I should just--
- [Announcer] Daryl "Juice"
Clark is at the start
of the rail section,
looking to redeem himself.
- I don't believe it.
- What? You thought I was
too old for this shit?
- Nah, I thought you was too lazy.
- I am. But what the fuck man,
speaking of lazy, I saw your first run.
- I sucked.
- Yeah, but only because
you didn't get enough
pop out of your knees, man.
You were dragging your ass.
You gotta stay low to the
last second, then pop!
- Thanks.
- Rip it up Juice.
- Thanks.
(upbeat rock music)
- Fuck yeah! Juice on the loose!
- Heard you were competing.
- Oh, well, yeah, in the half pipe later.
This slope style shit gives me jello legs.
- So, what are you doing here?
- I saw your last run, thought I'd,
help you find your balance.
I think it might be around here somewhere.
- Yeah. I know, I shit the bed.
- You're just leaning back too much.
You gotta attack. Lean into it.
Attack.
- Okay. Got it.
Thanks.
- Good luck.
- Yeah, you too.
- I'm gonna need it.
(Tracy laughing)
I'm gonna shit a whole lot more
than a bed if I fuck this one up.
I'm gonna shit the whole mountain.
- [Announcer] Alright,
here comes Tracy Alexander
after leaving Max Shred. She
struggled on her first run.
Can she crank it up for
a stellar showing here?
Alright, ladies and gentlemen,
make some noise for Tracy Alexander.
(crowd cheering)
Coming into the tabletop,
the big 360 with the grab.
Coming into her final hit here,
with the grab. A huge air trick!
(crowd cheering)
I don't know what got into her
from the last run, but that was sick.
(crowd applauding)
Let's move on now to the half pipe
where we have a surprise
entry, Max Fisher!
- You sure you wanna do this, buddy?
I mean, you're out of shape,
you're old, you probably
haven't practiced.
You're probably scared
shitless of falling right now.
Dude, falling would suck. The pain.
- Eddy, have I ever told
you you suck in motivation.
- Motivation's overrated. I
get all the motivation I need
from these bad boys right here.
Wanna hit?
- Nope.
Today, I set an example to
young athletes everywhere.
From now on, it's all about
hard work and clean living.
- [Announcer] The crowd is
so stoked to see this one.
And not try to get old Max fucked up.
- Aw, fuck.
(inhales deeply)
- Attack!
(inspirational rock music)
(laughing)
♫ Never give up on you dream
♫ You never believed in me
♫ A false hope is all I need
♫ Never give up on you dream
♫ You never believed in me
♫ A false hope is all I need
♫ Another breath wasted trying to explain
♫ I'm at my wits end
(snow crashing)
- Oh no!
- [Announcer] And let's jut
hope he's not badly hurt.
Though he's not moving too much.
And there's his former member
of his team, Max Shred,
running out to see if he's okay.
- [Both] Max!
- Max, are you okay?
- Max, are you hurt?
- Let me get these off.
- I think I just broke my back a little.
Did it look cool?
- Actually, it was awesome.
- [Eddy] Max, you're alive!
- I guess,
Team Max Shred isn't
pulling out the win today.
- Max, it doesn't matter.
The crowd loves you, it did the trick.
Everybody's talking about the team.
- [Eddy] You're killing it, dude.
- Well, does that mean we're
back on screwing terms?
- You are such a pig, Max.
And maybe.
- Yeah! I knew it!
(laughing)
- Eddy, yo, pussy, are you crying?
- No. It's just my glaucoma, turn away.
(laughing)
- Pussy.
That ain't glaucoma. You need a hug, man?
Come give me a hug real quick, come on.
Get up old man.
- [Max] Easy.
- [Juice] We got to go
to the massage parlor,
Sunday, I got this girl, Kiki.
- [Announcer] Ladies and
gentlemen, what a weekend we had,
and what a night we have here tonight,
the updown Super Comp throw down.
(uptempo rock music)
(mumbling)
(fireworks explosion)
- Watch out, my brother's jumping.
- [Announcer] Let's make
some noise, for Chris James!
(crowd cheering)
- Yeah, baby!
Yeah, baby!
- Yeah!
(crowd cheering)
- [Announcer] What a
weekend! What an event!
- What?! What?! What?!
Max Shred! Yeah!
♫ Time to strike you pose
♫ Then to finding peace
♫ Hoping to disappear
♫ Buried underground
♫ I'm already there
♫ So stop bringing me down
(inaudible)
- I'm VIP, let me in.
- Think about your future.
- Kingsley! Spinks! Let's party, dudes!
Oh, darn. Not on the list, what a shame.
- Wait a second, you
didn't even check them.
- Be sure to send me
that post card Kingsley.
I hear oblivion's nice this time of year.
- Get the--
You work out?
- Shut up, Spinks.
- Seriously, do you squat or something?
Arm curls? Bench? Cool.
- Mikey. Maybe we do suck.
But yo, we're on Team Max Shred.
(laughing)
- Kevin,
do you think that with these hats
were finally gonna get pro hoes?
(lighthearted music)
- [Both] Oh. Ooh.
- [Mikey] You guys smell so good.
- [K-Dog] Yes. Thank
you, thank you Max Shred!
- [Mikey] We made it!
♫ Millions of people looking for love
♫ Is it a secret from heaven above?
♫ Willing and waiting, wishing for more
♫ Will somebody save
me and unlock my heart?
♫ Season's are changing
♫ The passage of time
♫ Living in sequence
♫ Don't step out of line
♫ Can anyone see this?
♫ Is everyone blind?
♫ And walk through the darkness
♫ Just follow the light
♫ I see what I say, I say what I see
♫ Does everything seem so different to me
♫ I saw what I said, I said what I saw
♫ Coming in different just running it hot
♫ Read the writing on the wall
♫ Precious paper doll,
the pages fall apart
♫ I just can't shake you from my head
♫ And all the things you said
♫ They only break my heart
♫ Step out of your comfort
♫ And into your fears
♫ Jumping through windows
♫ Sucking up tears
♫ Reason with knowledge
♫ Changing of gears
♫ Remember be honest
♫ Forget all those years
♫ I see what I say, I say what I see
♫ Does everything seem so different to me
♫ I saw what I said, I said what I saw
♫ Coming in different just running it hot
♫ Read the writing on the wall
♫ Precious paper doll the pages fall apart
♫ I just can't shake you from my head
♫ And all the things you said
♫ They only break my heart
♫ Read the writing on the wall
♫ Precious paper doll the pages fall apart
♫ I just can't shake you from my head
♫ And all the things you said
♫ They only break my heart
♫ Remember that first kiss
♫ When time was lost and love was missed
♫ Recall my fingertips caress your neck
♫ And lick your lips
♫ Read the writing on the wall
♫ Precious paper doll the pages fall apart
♫ I just can't shake you from my head
♫ And all the things you said
♫ They only break my heart
♫ Read the writing on the wall
♫ Precious paper doll the pages fall apart
♫ I just can't shake you from my head
♫ And all the things you said
♫ There's nobody home
♫ I'm here on my own
♫ I should have known
♫ Right from the start
♫ Was it all wrong?
♫ Should I have gone?
♫ I should've listened to my heart
♫ Now that you are gone
♫ The days just move along
♫ Nothing matters
♫ Nothing stays the same
♫ Tell me, is it too late 'cause
♫ Now I belong
♫ Now I belong here with you
♫ Now I belong
♫ Now I belong here with you
(dramatic music)
(helicopter blades whirling)
♫ He's my definition
♫ For still holding on
♫ Just came through aggression
♫ Slipping out alive
♫ The world is not your playground
- Adios, compadre.
- Compadre?
Dude, he's pissed at you.
- For what?
I helped him try to fly that thing.
- He didn't want any help,
and he's pissed because you
tried to burn one on board.
- I did?
- Ah, dude, you're so burnt these days
you don't even remember.
- Remember what?
- Forget it, man, let's dig the moment.
Eddy, you old Yeti, we made it.
We're back on top.
- Oh no. Don't start with that again.
- Start with what?
- The "We made its."
Ever since we were kids
you'd always say that
and it would lead to our downfall.
- Eddy, this time it's different.
Our camp's making coin,
I'm back with Danielle,
you're partying more than ever,
and the kids are blowing up.
- You're right, Max, I don't
know what I was thinking.
(rock music)
(helicopter blades whirling)
♫ Don't wanna live, live in the abyss
♫ I can't go on with a life like this
♫ Half a life is nothing at all
♫ You got to rise above the crawl
♫ You got to be--
- Wow.
- Whoo!
- Do you smell that?
- Success!
- No.
- Freedom.
- Fresh air.
- Aw, Eddy!
That's fucking nasty.
- Takes a little while to get
out from all these layers,
but ate three bean quesadillas.
- All right, let's evacuate.
Drop it in.
(rock music)
(cheering)
- I'll race you down.
♫ Let's hug the sky, make it do or die
♫ I need the drummer
when I kick up the sound
♫ Let's hit the drive in a six red five
♫ And hit the highway
in a four wheel house
(mumbling)
- So, this is it guys.
First big comp of the season.
- Always kind of freaks me out.
- Yeah, I'm a little nervous too.
Last year, I didn't give a shit,
we had nothing to lose.
- Dog, this expo's nothing,
just TSA corporate bullshit.
- Yeah, but still.
I mean, I haven't been on a board
in three months or something.
Just feeling a little sketchy.
- In the summertime my boards have wheels,
instead of hitting the snow,
bam! I'm hitting the pavement.
Blood son. Blood.
- I had a great summer.
It was the first time
I didn't have to work, thanks to Danielle.
- Yeah guys, I mean,
we're about to shred our
first run of the season
and get paid for it. This is it.
- Let's go.
(uptempo techno music)
(women cheering)
Yo, guys...
I knew we was blowing up,
but this is wrong.
- Yeah. We better take the side door.
- You guys go ahead, I
just gotta grab something.
- [Chris] Alright, dude.
- I'm gonna love me some titties
and a whole lot of junk in the trunk.
- [Announcer] Good afternoon
ladies and gentlemen,
and welcome to the TSA Expo.
Showcasing the top riders
on the planet, as we kick
off a brand new season.
(uptempo rock music)
- This is my rider, Tracy.
- What I'm on TV?
Hey, yo mommy I'm on TV.
- [Tracy] Oh my God!
- Yeah!
You got that!
- Whoo!
- [Announcer] Oh, that is a
big 1080 from Chris James,
the star of the TSA Expo.
(laughing)
(cameras shuttering)
- Hey, girl.
- Ladies and gentlemen,
thank you very much for coming out
to the TSA Expo. Whoo!
(crowd cheering)
It is my pleasure to introduce to you
my brand new roster of this season,
and hopefully many more to come,
the future of snowboarding,
Team Max Shred!
(crowd cheering)
- [Max] Let's give it up,
for Team Max Shred! Yeah!
- [Crowd] Max Shred! Max Shred! Max Shred!
- Yeah! Whoo!
- This sport is being overrun
by drug addicts and deralets.
And it started on my watch.
- It ain't your fault, King.
It's that bitch Danielle.
Your old girlfriend.
Dirty whore.
Skanky little slut. Filthy cu--
- Hey! Spinks, I got the point.
- What the hell are you gonna do about it?
- Nothing. Max is a loser.
Will feed him enough rope,
let him hang himself.
Get the limo.
- Right away sir.
(slow rock music)
- To the spa, Spinks.
- Would that be Swedish
or Thai today, sir?
- I think I'm feeling shiatsu.
- Excellent choice.
(Spinks grunting)
(energetic rock music)
(laughing)
- Juice!
- That's right baby.
- [Max] Juice! You got
a rep to protect, man!
- Yeah, Juice. Kids look up to you now.
- For real!
- Speaking of reps, check it out,
Ross Rebagliati, snowboarding's
first gold medalist.
How's it going dude!
- Thanks for the party invite.
Hey, is there still a chance
I can get on the team?
- Well, you're gonna have
to take a blood test.
If it comes up clean, we don't want ya!
(laughing)
- I like your style Eddie the Yeti.
- Good hustle Ross!
- Hey guys, how 'bout a team photo?
Yo, Stills, get over here.
- Wait, where's Chris?
- There's Chris, hey Chris!
- [Tracy] I found him.
- Chris! Get over here, alright.
Fuck yeah, can I have this?
Alright, to you motherfucker.
(bottles clinking)
Ladies and gentlemen...
(bottle breaking)
- Max Fisher!
(crowd cheering)
- Alright. Thank you Eddy.
Everyone, raise your glasses
and join me in a toast
to a great event,
a great sponsor, and a great team.
And, a special toast
to our star of the day,
Chris James!
(crowd cheering)
- [Crowd] Team Max Shred! Team
Max Shred! Team Max Shred!
- You're blushing.
- No, I'm not.
- Yeah, you are, you're face is all red.
- No, it's not that--
- Come on, you're the shyest kid I know.
With press, with girls.
- No, Tracy it's not--
- Then what is it?
- It's just the champagne.
(spits)
I'm sorry.
- Gross.
- Sorry, I'm not big on this stuff.
- We're back on top babe.
(laughing)
Right where we left off.
- Ah no, where we left off was you
doing body shots off some
slut at the Stubby Bar,
and then passing out in Eddie's lap.
Now this time it's different.
You're helping these kids, it's wonderful.
- It's insanely wonderful.
(laughing)
You and me, we're gonna be huge.
We're gonna take Chris to the top.
- What are you talking about,
"Take Chris to the top"?
What about the others? What about Tracy?
She won the best female in her event,
no one's toasting her.
- Tracy!
♫ To take off your clothes
- You're not even listening.
- No. I hear what you're saying.
But Chris is the golden ticket.
If he does well, we all do well.
- Okay.
I'm just sayin, be careful.
- Look at that.
(mumbling)
They all want him.
We gotta fight to keep him.
(mellow reggae music)
Hold this for a second.
Yo Chris man, come hang
out with the rest of us!
(water splashing)
You like champagne man,
let's get some more.
- Careful ladies, these
two men resent women.
- Then why the hell do we
plow the crap out of 'em all the time?
- Leave those bozos alone.
Don't let them get to ya.
We're here on business.
- You got it, King.
- Well, Kingsley.
What brings you here?
I thought you were out of business.
- No. I left the association
with a very handsome package.
- Spinks?
- No, you idiot. Money.
Enough to start my own agency.
I'll be repping some of the
biggest minds in the industry.
Perhaps you've heard of, Tomahawk?
- Really? Who's riding for ya?
- Wouldn't you like to know.
- Yeah, I would. That's why I asked.
- You will find out soon enough, Max.
Step aside, we've got
some shmoozing to do.
- Alright.
(laughing)
- So, Max, where are these experienced
assistants you were telling me about?
- Yo, dudes!
- Yo, my boys! My peeps!
- [Mikey] Sup suckas!
- Looking forward to
making this shit legit!
Gonna help you dial this shit in, son.
Yo, just show me where the dial's at!
- Yo, dog, this shit spreads
easier than your mom's legs.
- Hey, fuck you.
- Max, for fucks sakes.
- Pete, let's make this happen.
This is gotta be the best video ever.
Sweet angles, sick slow-mo,
every crazy cinematic trick
you have up your sleeve.
It's gotta be even better than
the last sick video you made for us.
- Dude, you didn't even pay me last time.
- Pete, we're burning daylight!
Let's do this. Let's make a movie.
Alright. Eddie, let them know the concept.
- Alright. We shoot
some late night antics,
including, but not limited to:
Extreme radness, excessive drinking,
damaging of public property,
insults directed at innocent people,
horribly good dancing, smart ass remarks,
invasion of personal space,
terrible rapping, drunken mumbling,
beautiful women, and overall talent
and poor decision making.
All of this, of course,
is peppered together
with hot shot stunts performed by
our world class cast of
snowboard superstars,
including Juice.
- Hey!
(laughing)
- We cut it all together,
and hope the kids shell
out their allowance for it.
- Just like back in the day.
- [Eddie] Exactly.
- Alright. Pete, set up
the first shot. Let's roll!
- I'm a great snowboarder,
you guys are jealous.
- Grab that black case, alright.
- Yeah!
- Careful with this,
that's fucking expensive.
This way, let's go to the lift dude.
(relaxed pop music)
(high energy rock music)
- Whoa, buddy!
- Hey! What the fuck!
♫ I'll take the best part of you with me
- Alright, buddy!
♫ I promise I'll lie each time we speak
♫ What you gonna do when the
world comes crashing down?
- Hey, let's use that one side angle shot
that makes the jump look even bigger,
and more ridiculous than it is.
- Sure thing, Max.
- Max, seriously, you're gonna have to
turn on some sirens if you
want me to go down that thing.
- Would you rather be making sandwiches?
- Uh, yeah.
- Come on Juice, quit
being such a little bitch.
- Come on Max, it is pretty huge.
- Let's do this.
Whoo!
(intense rock music)
(laughing)
We filmed it?
- Oh yeah, we got that.
- Record over it, man.
- We can't dude, it's film.
- Hey, hey roll Pete, roll!
(crashing snow)
(mumbling)
- Wanna try another?
- Ah, go to hell.
- Hey, hey, here goes Stacy.
(crashing snow)
- I was hoping her pants would come off!
- I was hoping she'd
land on her knees, yo!
- Did you see her ass flip over?
(laughing)
Sorry, Tracy.
- Pete, please tell me you got that.
- Have you no faith?
- Yes. Another one for the fail section.
- Max you're an asshole.
- You alright girl?
- You want me to but a little
tiger balm on that shit?
- You want a massage?
(Pete laughing)
- Pete, throw it to slow-mo.
- Sure thing.
- This one's the money.
- For sure.
(all cheering)
- That's what I'm talking about man!
First money shot of the year!
Please tell me you got that Pete.
- Actually, I ran out of film.
- What?
- You idiot!
- I'm just kidding. I got it on film.
- I knew it! I knew that. Hell yeah!
Alright, good day guys.
Chris, you are the man.
Let's go home and party!
- Whoo!
- Hey, party tonight, alright.
(relaxed guitar music)
- [Man] Hey, Eddy!
- Hey, party tonight, alright?
- [All] Max! Max! Max! Max! Max! Max!
Max! Max! Max! Max! Max!
- [Juice] Holy shit!
- Eddie, just in time dude.
Pete, did you get that?
- Yeah, I got it. Do you
think we could maybe wrap now?
- Wrap? We're just getting started.
We still got the big hot tub scene to do.
- Oh yeah, that's right. I totally gabbed.
We still have those girls coming over.
- Ladies?
- Not just any ladies.
We're talking smokin, hot,
luscious, boobs!
(metal guitar music)
- I'm in son.
Get the bottles. I get the models.
- It's okay Juice, this is
a scene with just Chris
and the girls in it.
- Whoa, whoa...
That hot tub without me is like, you know,
gin without the juice,
it ain't gonna happen.
- Sorry guys. I just got
this scene worked out in my head where
Chris comes off like a real pimp.
- Yeah!
- Money and video hoes.
Don't worry though, I'll think
of some dope shit for you guys too.
Yo Pete, you get the underwater cam?
(lid pops off)
- With the fish-eye lens.
♫ I wanna take you higher
than you've ever been
- That's how I used to do it.
♫ And I wanna show you
life that I always miss
Let me coach you in the tub,
as well as on the hill, Chris.
(girls laughing)
Take a big drink.
♫ I wanna take you higher
than you've every been
Don't be stingy with the kisses Chris.
Alright. It's like a menage a trois
love with the three of you. Yes.
♫ Dirty dancin
♫ Backwards scratchin
♫ Make it prancin
♫ Ghetto blastin
♫ Pistol wippin
♫ Hipsters trippin
♫ Skateboards rippin
♫ Flies unzippin
♫ Let me show you how in the world
♫ So simplistic
(laughing)
♫ Mental, maestro with the serves
♫ Female bodies with no shirts
♫ Hold my hammer make it swing
♫ So seductive ba-da-bing
♫ Hot with pleasure I see things
(camera clicks)
♫ Feel my horny
♫ Feed my sting
♫ I'm gonna make you scream in pain
- Man it's the last time, little weird.
Hey superstar, where you goin?
- Hey.
- Hey, what's up guys?
- We're shooting hella-boarding today.
- I'm gonna take a couple quick runs.
Max and Eddy are still asleep, so.
- Wants some company?
- Nah, nah. You chill.
But I'll be right back, okay?
- What's wrong girl?
You ain't feeling no love?
- I'm feeling just fine, thanks.
(energetic rock music)
- What up Chris-ter.
- Not much, Mr. Brown.
- No. Call me King.
- Okay.
King.
- You don't have to be nervous bra.
Not the head of the
National Snowboarding Association anymore.
I know I must have been intimidating
for you young riders.
Being in the presence of
a god-like such as myself.
But now I'm just a leading rep from
the snowboard industry.
Bringing products to
snowboarders everywhere
for the good of the sport.
- Cool.
- Way cool, dude.
And you can be part of it.
How would you like to be part of
the biggest campaign from a
new snowboard company ever?
I'm talking about a campaign focusing
on one of the most promising young riders
to ever shred, you.
- Hey, look I'm sorry man,
but I'm already hooked up here.
- TSA hooked you up, huh?
TSA hooked you up with that?
That board's not right you.
- I like this board. This...
- Maybe you'd like a
contract with more money,
more media, more exposure,
and most of all more TLC
from a guy who like riding young men.
Young men riding. Young...
Young men who ride. You know what I mean.
- Yeah.
Uh, look, I'm sorry Mr. Brown
but I ride for Max Shred, so...
- Chris-ter, Chris-ter,
a great man once said,
"One shot you got, it's a chance to blow,
"this opportunity comes
once in a lifetime."
- And who said that?
- Eminem.
- Okay.
- Think about it.
- Yeah. Sure man. Whatever.
- Late.
(snow scrapes)
- You guys bond, or what?
- He'll come around.
I think it's gonna take a little finesse.
- Sweet. Wanna hit a few runs?
- Spinks, I can't be seen
with a "snow-blader."
- Come on, King.
I promise I'll keep my
sweet aerials to a minimum.
Check this out.
Like that?
(Spinks laughing)
- Spinks, Spinks!
- I'm way better on the pipe.
- Spinks, we need to talk.
- Catch you in the hot tub.
(helicopter blades whirling)
- My brother, don't tell me
I seen them leave without us.
- Okay, I won't.
- What's going on, Eddie?
- Hey, don't hate dudes. We
could only get one chopper.
- That's bullshit man.
- Relax! It's all good.
- Whatever, let's go hit the park.
- Yo, the hell with you man.
I got some shit I wanna
try on the rails anyway.
- Hey, I'll meet you
guys back at the crib.
We're gonna film you doing
keg stands later. Whoo!
(electronic rock music)
(helicopter blades whirling)
♫ Wasted days
♫ Time's never worth saving
♫ When all you have is hate
♫ And now the drama unfolds
♫ And I'm not even scared
♫ In fact I'm looking forward
♫ To seeing you when you fail
♫ Hate for me
♫ Is all you've got
♫ Is all you've got, jealousy
♫ Hate for me
♫ Is all you've got
♫ Is all you've got, jealousy
♫ Said fallaciously
♫ We all now the truth
♫ Can't live up to your expectations
♫ As long as Heads Up crew likes our songs
♫ We don't give a fuck if you hate them
♫ So let me know
♫ When we write a song that's "crucial"
♫ Or are you too busy sitting at home
♫ Hating on bands as usual
♫ Get out your parents basement
♫ And off the hardcore message boards
♫ I'm sorry your shitty band
♫ Will never even go on tour
♫ Hate for me
♫ Is all you got
- Stop holding the camera
in the sack, buddy.
- [Pete] Alright, alright!
♫ Hate for me
(mumbles)
♫ Is all you've got
♫ Is all you've got, jealousy
- [Max] Pan with him. Yeah!
- Nice.
- That's my style.
- [Eddy] Dude, I knew I'd find you here.
- This is my second office.
- A home away from home.
- Tina! A glass for the Yeti.
So, what's up man.
- Wanna hear the good
news, or the better news?
- Start with the good news.
- Good choice.
I don't know if you heard,
but we got a ton of people
signing up for camp.
- Oh yeah? Cheers to that.
(glasses clink)
- All types of randoms man.
We got some kids, couple chicks,
some old geezers. Some
of them can even shred.
- Well bring 'em on.
And remember, it's 25
bucks just to try out,
with no guarantee they get in.
- Totally.
- Get the cash up front, too.
This sport attracts a
lot of sketchy characters
with highly questionable morals.
(scoffs)
- Dirt bags.
- Exactly.
So, what's that better news.
- I found this big bag of weed
downstairs in the lockers.
- Oh shit.
- You wanna go home and smoke it?
- Yeah, man. I'll meet you
there in like half a pitcher.
- It's almost 4:20.
- I know what that means.
- Golden Girls is on. Gotta go.
- Later bro.
- Hey. We're back, right?
- We're back.
(glasses clink)
(rock music)
(sexual rock music)
♫ Now that we've met
- Nice moves.
♫ And you know my name
- Uh, thanks.
- I would love to try that someday.
- Have you ever been snowboarding?
- No. I ski, and badly.
(laughing)
In fact, I've never even been on a board.
- You should try, it's pretty easy.
- I'm afraid of falling too much on my--
(sexual rock music)
I don't want to hurt it.
- Yeah, me neither. I mean--
Uh, yeah.
You should take some lessons or something.
- Yeah, maybe. If I can
find the right teacher.
- Well, they have a pretty good
lesson program on this mountain.
- Well, I kind of was
hoping for a private lesson.
- That'll also work, yeah.
- Well, maybe I'll see you around.
- Okay.
(relaxed hip hop music)
- Hey guys, how's it goin?
Where's the Yeti.
(steam hissing)
- Whoa, dude.
- Oh, there you are man.
How come you're not wearing a shirt?
- Jamaican dishwasher
man, you know the rules,
no shirts allowed, bro or
chick. Equal rights, dude.
- Yes! I win again.
- Yo, Chris, I was
distracted by those fools.
You know what I'm saying?
- Pay up.
- Once again, my people being exploited
by the white man, you're
all in this together.
K, K, K.
- Hey, don't sweat it Juice.
Tomorrow you'll all be
making some extra paper.
- Wicked. How can I be down?
- Eddy, it was your idea.
- Must have been before
the Jamaican dishwasher.
- Eddy, you're a fuckin scientist.
Let me refresh your burnt brain.
Now, we have a sizeable list of kids
signing up for the new camp tryouts.
We don't got enough time
to check them all out.
We were thinking, maybe you
guys take over the tryouts,
we'll split the registration fee with ya,
and it'll be a good way to give
something back to the sport.
I mean, look what it's
done for Eddy and me.
(air whirling)
- Ow.
(phone ringing)
- Hey, Danielle? Yeah.
Alright, I'll be right over.
Alright, we'll talk to you guys tomorrow.
Eddy let's go, let's
let them get some rest.
- Just one more load.
(Danielle laughing)
- Let's see, hot boozy
breath on the back of my neck
and shaky hands, must be Max.
- Hey, could've been Kingsley
trying to get back with you.
- Ah, he quit drinking.
- Spinks says he swallows.
(laughing)
- That's disgusting.
- Don't tell me, tell Kingsley.
- You can tell him yourself, he's back.
- I heard.
- Did you hear he's repping
Tomahawk boards now?
- Yeah, so what?
- And he's looking for
a new marquee rider?
- Let him look.
- At Chris?
- I'm not worried.
- Well, I am. If we lose him,
that is a huge hole in my profile.
My bosses would not be happy.
- Relax. Chris wouldn't
leave us, he loves us.
- Okay.
(rap music)
- These guys are fucked.
Up for some arts and crafts?
- Facials?
- All around.
Thanks for coming with me,
I've had my heart set on a latte all day.
- Oh, no worries.
It's good to get a break from Max's video.
I think a bunch of people
from his old crew are coming over later
to smash bottles on their heads.
- Max's video? I thought
it was your video?
- I don't know what it is anymore.
I mean, Max keeps telling me
it's gonna make me a star,
but I don't know. I just wanna compete
and, you know, get better.
- Well, you will. I don't doubt that.
- Thanks.
- Do you want anything?
- No, I'm good.
- Okay. I'll be right back.
- Okay.
- Hi there.
- Hey. What's up?
- Nothing much, I'm just
heading back to my hotel.
But I'm afraid I've lost my bearings.
Do you know where the Sierra Lodge is?
- Uh, yeah, yeah. It's just
to the right over there.
- Do you think that you could walk me?
- Yeah, sure.
- [Lisa] Your girlfriend?
- No. Just a teammate.
- Well, I promise I won't keep you.
You're shaking. Are you cold?
- No. I mean, I'm just...
You know what, I guess
I'm just really nervous.
Maybe it's cause you're like
the hottest girl I've ever met.
- Please.
(laughs shyly)
You probably have all
these girls after you.
I mean, I've seen them following you.
- Hey, what about you?
Do you have, like, a
boyfriend or anything?
- Maybe.
So, do you wanna come in?
- No. I should get back
'cause my friend's probably
looking for me by now.
Oh.
(phone ringing)
Yeah?
- Hey, Chris. Where'd you go?
- I just ran in to someone.
- Okay. Well, tell me where you are,
I'll come meet you.
- You now what, I'll meet
you back at the chalet.
I'm just gonna hang out for a bit.
Is that cool?
- Yeah. Okay. Cool.
Bye.
[Chris] See ya.
(relaxed guitar music)
- [Max] So when ya coming back?
- Depends on how the meetings go.
Europe is a big market in snowboarding
and we need to get established there.
- I'll miss you.
- I will be home soon
and you'll be fine with Eddy.
Although, watch him because he's been
acting very strange lately.
- Oh. He just got his hands
on some really good weed.
- Well, that would explain it.
- Ah. Now, listen, I have
put together a portfolio
of TSA's new campaign for the team.
And can you be sure to get each
of the riders to sign their new contract?
I've marked where they need to sign.
Late getting back from legal.
- Yeah. No worries. I'll
take care of everything.
Fear not.
- Okay.
- Aw shit...
(paper rustling)
it's good.
(mumbling)
Awesome.
- Just make yourself at home.
- This place is pretty nice.
- Yeah! The company pays for it.
If I was here on vacation, I
would get something smaller.
Something, cozier.
- So, what is it that you do?
- I work in the snowboard
industry in public relations.
- Oh, that's sweet. We're
like in the same business.
I mean, sort of.
- Yeah, but let's not
talk business tonight.
It's been such a long day.
- Tell me about it. It's all
my coaches wanna talk about.
The deal, the video, the money.
- There are other things in life.
How about you sit and relax,
and I will go order us some drinks?
(rap music)
♫ And I will never forget the
days that we had, the regrets
(energetic rock music)
- What's up guys?
- Juice, you grab her
legs, I got her arms.
- Alright then, looks like all
the work's been done for us.
- All you have to do is
worry about the team.
- What's there to worry about?
- The team is the cornerstone
of everything TSA's doing in snowboarding.
Without the team we don't
have a presence in this sport.
Please don't screw this up.
- When have I ever screwed up?
Point taken.
- I'm not leaving this minute, Max.
My flight's not 'til tomorrow morning.
- Well then, looks like we
got a long night ahead of us.
- Which means it will be
over 20 minutes from now
with you drooling on my chest.
- Can you blame me for
drooling over this chest?
(scoffs)
- Gee, thanks.
- Can't believe you're gonna miss
Max and Eddy's first
big party of the year.
- I love it when you talk
about yourself in the third person.
- So does Max.
(laughing)
- Let's go.
- I'm not really big on this stuff.
- You need to learn how to relax.
I can show you how,
and then you can teach
me how to snowboard.
- Okay. It's a deal.
(laughing)
(glasses clinking)
♫ Yo, it's the beauty that's perceived
♫ In the eye of the beholder
♫ But a girl that will make you
♫ turn your head around your shoulder
♫ Just to cath a little glimpse
♫ Of an angel that descended from heaven
♫ just to pinch me out of my dreams
♫ Stayed awake. Could it be fate?
- Sorry.
♫ Instant attraction the
moment that I met you
♫ With palpitations of
my heart beating faster
♫ At the stare of her eyes
and the sound of her laughter
♫ Just a soft touch
- You like what you see?
- Yeah. Definitely.
- So do I.
♫ So this is something
that I wrote for you
♫ Yo what is love
♫ What is it's meaning to you
♫ The feeling so true
♫ The power to change gray to blue
♫ And what is love
♫ Yo, when it feels so right
♫ And all you wanna do is hold her tight
♫ And never let go
♫ Let go, let go
♫ Let go, let go
♫ And never let go
- What?
- I made it.
(laughing)
- Not yet.
♫ My stomach's weak with the desire
♫ To let my true feelings free
♫ I can't do it
♫ It makes me feel to vulnerable
♫ This horrible ain't it
♫ That I wanna tell you I love you
♫ But I can't say it
♫ I mean, what if it changes
♫ Everything about us I know
♫ What if I tell I love you
♫ And you're like, "I gotta go"
♫ That'd be messed up, right?
♫ Yo, what if I just told you
♫ I like you a whole lot
♫ Would that be alright?
- Late night, huh?
- Yeah. I was just chillin.
How 'bout you?
- The usual.
- Yeah.
(Chris laughing)
(relaxed guitar music)
- Where's Max and Chris?
- Danielle has them doing some interviews.
We're gonna meet them later
at the press conference.
Here comes our talent.
(techno rock music)
- Okay. You're playing us, right?
- Why you trippin' Juice?
You promised a lesson
to anyone who tried out.
Remember, it's all about giving back.
(camera clicks)
- [Mikey] Yo, this way if
some bitch steps up like,
"What," in my face I could reach,
I got full mobility, you know what I mean.
- Mikey, take that shit off man,
you look like a fool.
- It's comfortable.
- [K-Dog] Be professional.
- Off my back!
- Hey, where's Chris?
- Chris? I think he's gonna be
a little late this morning dogs.
He was, like, totally nacker.
- He was out partying?
- Chris? He doesn't drink.
- Maybe he got...
(sexual rock music)
some.
♫ Now that we met
- Damn.
♫ And you know my name
♫ Yeah trouble baby
♫ But I'm not to plain
♫ Cause it takes two wrongs
- Sup, guys. This is Lisa.
Lisa, this is my crew.
We got Pete the Filmer, this is Mikey,
Max, Eddy, and K-Dog.
- I've heard so much about you,
Chris has said a lot.
- Oh yeah? Did he tell
you my girlfriend's away?
- Did he tell you I like pouring
chocolate sauce on women,
and then licking it off
while they watch old
snowboard videos of mine?
- No. He didn't.
- Damn, girl. Haven't we met before.
- K-K-K-Dog! Lisa, Lisa's
my girl. Alright, guys?
Alright, let's just get started.
Chris, this is the scene where we do
a little Chris-mania action.
You're gonna get chased by a horde
of screaming teenagers
with only your board to fend them off.
It's like a take on Beetle-mania,
except they didn't snowboard.
- Alright, that's cool.
I like the Beatles.
- Great. Here's how it's gonna work,
when I give Mikey over there the signal...
- Holla!
- He's gonna send the girls running,
and then you just start backing up
and swinging your board to keep them
from ripping your clothes off.
- Why would he do that?
- 'Cause he doesn't want
them to rip his clothes off.
- Why not?
- 'Cause he's here in the
middle of the village.
- Everyone's gonna think he's gay.
- It's just a scene, it's
supposed to be funny.
- Well it's not gonna be funny for Chris
when everyone starts calling him faggot.
Like, "Hey faggot."
- Dude, no one called the Beatles faggots.
- How do you know?
- Hey man, I'm the director.
We're gonna do it my way, it's my vision.
Here's how it's gonna work.
When I give Mikey the signal...
- Go, go, go, go, go, go, go!
(uptempo rock music)
- Damn girl, you have
got some great titties.
- Aw, fuck off!
- Chris!
Guys get off of him!
- [Max] Looks like Chris-mania
got the best of you buddy!
- Ladies and gentlemen,
on behalf of Team Max Shred,
it is my distinct pleasure to
introduce our latest sponsor,
the greatest energy drink ever,
and the greatest spokesman ever,
Chris James!
(audience cheering)
- Come on up here Team Max Shred!
- [All] We want Max
Shred! We want Max Shred!
- Alright, Chris! You
guys, come on, get up here!
Tracy! Let's get up here to take a photo.
Juice, get up here man.
(cameras clicking)
- Hey!
- Oh! Oh! Yeah!
(water splashing)
- Yo, this is gangster man.
Specially after such a fucked up day.
- Aw, no doubt kid, for real my nig--
Dude.
Yo, filming parts is tiring.
- Yo, all we need is a couple
freaks to hit that shit up!
(laughing)
Black power.
- Yeah. Black power.
- Room for one more?
- Oh, you know it. Hop in girl.
- Ooh.
- Girl, you so hot you're gonna
make that water boil over.
- Stop.
(breathing deeply)
Thank you.
(water splashing)
- Yo, little freaky white
boy, get out of here, man.
(mumbling)
- Yo, I'm just fishing for clams dog.
- Out.
- Yeah, whatever.
- Yo, yo K-Dog, go get you (mumbling)
'cause you need some relief boy.
- Alright, alright.
- You're cool?
- Yeah. Why not?
I'm in a hot tub, in a luxury
chalet in the mountains,
being held as a celebrity
for doing what I love.
It's all good.
- It ain't all good. Max has
been playing us for fools.
You see what he got going on with Chris.
It's all about him.
We're like the gravy on
the turkey, a big turkey.
- Don't call Chris a turkey,
it not his fault, he's just
overwhelmed by everything
that's happened to us.
You know. It's not his fault
he's so talented either,
he's a good guy. He's just a...
(sexual rock music)
bastard.
- Hey. Tracy, Juice,
I'd like you to meet my,
my friend, Lisa.
- It's a pleasure.
- The pleasure is all mine.
So, Lisa, tell me,
what brings you to this slice of paradise?
- I work for a snowboarding
rep, it's a dream job.
- For real?
- Yes. Lots of travel, great hotels,
really nice people,
and the best part of it
is that I get to meet people like Chris.
He's such an awesome guy.
- Awesome.
- Like, totally awesome.
- I know it's kind of soon and all but,
I don't know we just get
such a strong vibe together.
It's almost spiritual.
- Lust?
- Yeah. That too, he's a tiger.
He's been wearing me out.
- Okay.
- Hey, Tracy if you're coming back
could you grab us a couple coldies.
- I don't think she's coming back man.
(sensual music)
(heavy breathing)
- Wow.
It feels like I've been
hiking the pipe all day.
- Come on, you're like
a professional athlete.
I should be the tired one.
I've been riding your super pipe all day.
- Yeah. Well, let's
just say team Max Shred
isn't exactly up at the
crack of dawn training.
- Obviously.
- What is that supposed to mean?
I beat my old record back
there by like 13 seconds.
- I know, and you did a great job.
I'm just wondering, don't
you guys ever train,
you know, off the snow?
- No. Max and Eddy don't
really believe in that.
They're always saying, you know,
"Either you got it, or you don't."
Lifting weights is just gonna
make your jacket fit tighter.
(laughing)
- Yeah. But, don't you
guys think about injuries
or conditioning and stuff?
- What do you know about conditioning?
- My boss was telling me about it.
- Who's your boss?
- I don't know if you've
heard of him, Kingsley Brown.
- What? That douche bag?
- Douche bag? Says who?
- I don't know. My coaches
just have a history with him.
- Well, the Kingsley Brown that I know,
is a really great boss.
Anyway, he was saying that,
"I'm more concerned with
for my riders' health
"rather than any video,
or competition results."
It sounded good to me.
Mr. Pro-rider.
Are you ready for another round?
- I don't know if I have
any fluids left in my body.
But, let's give it a try.
- [Announcer] Welcome to
the Silver Star Rail Jam,
where the best of the
best rip the baddest,
raddest rails this side of the Rockies.
- It's like we ain't even a team no more.
First Max and Eddy make him
out like someone special,
better than us, then this freak ass
groupie bitch is all over him.
Where's my freak ass groupie bitch?
- Don't sweat it Juice,
we just gotta ride.
And that's all that matters.
- Oh, that's what I'm saying.
I wanna ride, a freak ass groupie bitch.
What?
(uptempo rock music)
(crowd yelling)
- You guys are gonna remember this night,
the night Chris James lives up to the hype
and proves he is the future of this sport.
Hey, and be sure to stop
by our crib tomorrow night.
We're gonna have the
teaser for our new video,
featuring some of the hottest talent
this sport has to offer.
- [Announcer] Next up,
we got Tracy Alexander
ready to rock the rails.
She's part of Team Max Shred
and they're poised to
take over this sport.
Alright, ladies and
gentlemen give it up for
Tracy Alexander.
- Yeah, Tracy!
- [Announcer] Alright,
next to drop is rider 113,
Daryl "The Juice" Clark
from Team Max Shred.
Looking so good on this first rail.
- Dude, the Juice is good.
- [Announcer] They are the
top of the snowboarding world.
- Did you hear that? Did you
get that? What he's saying?
(crowd cheering)
- [Announcer] Alright, now
rider 114, Chris James.
He's been killing it in
the pipe all season long.
Let's see what he has
on the rails on course.
(crowd yelling)
(crowd booing)
(upbeat rock music)
- Yeah!
- [Announcer] Tracy Alexander
doing her thing on the bar.
Ladies and gentlemen, give
it up for Tracy Alexander,
for Team Max Shred!
(Tracy laughing)
- Prepare to be amazed baby.
- [Announcer] Next up,
for his last run is Juice.
Ready to drop in, this crowd
absolutely loves this guy.
(crowd cheering)
Juice Clark does not disappoint
with the sick invert for Team Max Shred.
Their coaches have got to
be proud of them right now.
- Of course I am, I made them didn't I?
Hey, here comes Chris. Check this out.
- [Announcer] Chris
James. Looking to make up
for a rare slip up here in his final run.
(crowd yelling)
- [Announcer] But there
has to be a consolation
in the big win by Juice
Clark in the men's open.
- Hey, everybody has an off night.
I've bailed in a big comp once.
- Yeah. Right after he
smoked this huge spliff.
It was bigger than this.
(camera clicks)
- Hey dude, put that away man.
We gotta go talk to Chris.
- See ya at the video teaser.
- That's right. Hey, Max.
- [Eddy] One sec guys.
- Dude, what happened?
- You saw it. What do you want me to say?
- We're supposed to be showcasing
the brand, not sucking.
- Hey! Give him a break, he did his best.
- You stay out of it! I'm his coach.
Maybe if you two weren't so busy
trying to set the world humping record.
Chris would stand a chance.
- Screw you, you old fart.
- I'd rather you screw me,
then maybe he'd do better.
- Chill out Max, alright.
Maybe if you weren't
running me around so hard.
I mean, between the media
and the photo shoots,
and the video, man I'm tired.
- We'll talk later man.
That is unless you end up
setting the record tonight.
- In case you're wondering,
the record, I hold it.
Just wanted to say, good luck.
- You know, I'm worried
about your situation Chris.
And I have somebody that I
think you should talk to.
- Lisa, look, I think I know
where you're going with this.
- And are you against it?
- Yeah, maybe not.
- Chris! What a surprise.
How are ya this evening? Come here.
Let's shoot the shop with
ya for a second, okay?
Let me rap a little bit.
- Yeah, sure.
- Are you happy with
your coaching situation?
- Yeah. Yeah, sure. I mean--
- You don't sound too
convincing there, Chris.
Here's the way I see it,
looks like a couple of old pros
who are so excited to be back in the game
that they're willing to
do anything to pimp out
their number one prospect,
I mean pimp him out raw.
Bet you haven't been
- Yeah.
- doing a lot of practicing lately, huh?
- No, not really.
- That's what I thought.
Listen, it's Max and
Eddy. It's Max and Eddy.
You know, we go way back.
I'm sure they told you that, right?
Oh yeah, yeah. We were compadres, man,
compadres.
- Really?
- Yeah. They're great guys,
but they don't know how
to run a snowboard team.
They teach camp, they
don't manage careers.
- Yeah. I guess but,
I mean, they're trying.
- Chris, you're a loyal guy, I like that.
I like that about you.
But sometimes you need to
do what's right for you.
We got a crack team here man.
With Lisa doing the PR,
we'll be all over the map.
- And think about it Chris,
you and me traveling the world.
- She'd do anything for ya, anything.
- Of course I would, I love him.
- Talking, like, the things
people do when they're in love.
You know what I'm saying.
- You know what, Kingsley?
Sign me up.
- Let's go get a drink.
(relaxed hip hop music)
- Mikey, man, I'm over being
Max's bitch for this video.
You know, if I practice
enough I still got a chance.
Yo, I just gotta stomp that 180,
then Max would let me
on the tizzeam fo' sho.
- Dude, I know you could stomp that shit.
It's just a matter of confidence.
You just gotta rip it, yo.
Yeah boy.
(laughing)
- Hey, what's up guys?
- [K-Dog] Just chillin'.
- [Mikey] Sup.
- You guys shredding today?
- Gonna slay this bad boy run right here.
- Yeah, cool.
Okay, Lisa. This is the
easiest run on the mountain.
You ready for it?
- I think so.
- Alright.
- So long, boys.
- Chia late.
Easiest? Kid, this run is gangsta.
- Sick!
- Man, Chris hit the lotto.
(mumbling)
- Yo, yo, yo, yo. I feel like I know her.
- Dude, bitches that hot do not
talk to your stupid ass.
- Do too.
- [Mikey] No. No, no.
- If I stick this 180 they will.
Move aside, son.
West side!
(snow crashing)
- Bail!
(laughing)
(mumbling)
- Alright, you guys, we
gotta kill this for Max,
and then let's give him some Trouble.
One, two, three.
(crowd cheering)
♫ I set you off
♫ I set you off
♫ Lie if you want
♫ I get you off, baby
♫ I'm no good, I'm no good
♫ What's so good?
♫ Take one thing that you're lookin' for
♫ Take ten more and I gotta be sure
- There's Max.
- This is huge.
- I know.
- People are so stoked
to see our video teaser.
- We're all stoke to see it,
we haven't seen any of it yet.
- Trust me, it's mint.
- Yo, this shit, this shit right here,
is gonna be off the hizzle
dizzle, you naw mean?
We're gonna go down in the histo--
(phone rings)
- Oh, hold up. Must be Mikey.
Mikey C., what's up?
Ma, I told you not to call me.
Yeah. No, you're cramping my st--
Yes, I did do the lau--
Yo, okay I'm--
He-, hello?
Goddamn it.
(closes phone)
Yo, I gotta...
- It's cool. It's cool.
- I gotta bounce.
- Yeah. Thanks for coming.
- Yeah. Let me know how it goes, aight?
♫ You set me off, baby
- So, where's Chris anyway.
- Juice went to go get him.
He's been with you know who, so.
He's slaying him to get his ass over here.
(knocking on door)
- Chris! I know you're in there.
Hi five.
(hands slap)
(laughing)
Double high five!
I tried. Hey!
(door slams)
♫ What you think baby?
No, you can't hate me
♫ I get you off, I make you soft
♫ I take you off, the life I want, baby
(crowd cheering)
- Alright. Everyone, back in the day,
it was all about videos.
And we pioneered that shit.
(crowd cheering)
And here we are, back where we belong.
There he is! Chris! Alright, man!
- Hey, Max.
- You ready for super stardom?
Alright, before we watch the teaser,
I just wanna thank everyone
who helped make it.
Pete! Best filmer ever.
(crowd cheering)
My girl, Danielle, who
made it all possible.
May man, Eddy.
(crowd cheering)
My best friend. And of course, my team.
What a great group of kids.
(mumbling)
And last, but the opposite of least,
Chris James! Give it up!
(crowd cheering)
- What? He's a team?
(Tracy scoffs)
But, seriously?
- It's ridiculous.
- Alright! Roll it!
(crowd cheering)
- This is my world. Welcome to it.
(rock music)
(crowd cheering)
(audience laughing)
- [All] Yeah!
- Wow, I told you.
(crowd cheering)
- Yeah! You see that shit! Give it up!
Yeah! Chris, get up here man.
- Nah.
(Max scoffs)
- Ha! Can you believe it, man?
So talented, yet so shy. Aw shit.
There he is, my numero uno all-star.
They loved it, man. What'd you think?
- It was good, but does it
need to be centered on me?
- The other riders were in there,
you just stand out like Eddy's potbelly
in any shirt smaller than an extra large.
- Right. Hey, listen Max,
I gotta talk to you about something.
- Sequels? Yeah, I know man.
These things are gonna
fly off the shelves.
We start filming next week.
- Right, right, but,
listen, I made a decision.
- To do some shots?
Eddy, tequila!
Oh, the good stuff.
- A couple of these and
I'll be fucking good.
- Yeah you will. Hook us up.
Give you those, ha. Here's
to the latest and greatest.
- Max, I'm leaving the team.
(spits)
- My retinas!
- [Max] What?!
- I'm sorry you guys. You
know you guys are my friends,
but I just, I think I need
something different right now.
- So we'll set you up
on some different gear.
- No man, it's not
that. It's the coaching,
I signed up with Kingsley Brown.
- Kingsley Brown?
Please tell me there's another
Kingsley Brown around town these days.
- Man, I'm sorry.
- I think I'm gonna throw up.
- Kingsley makes me sick too, man.
- No, man. It's the tequila.
- It's nothing personal you guys I just,
I gotta go. I'm sorry you guys.
- Aw, this is bad.
- I know. My eyes are burning.
- Focus, Eddy. We just
lost the face of our team.
We gotta go tell the others.
- Oh, watch your dick.
- Guys, no need to panic here,
but we just lost Chris.
- Yeah, we know. He told us an hour ago.
- He told you first?
- Yeah. Hard to believe we came first
in something, ain't it?
- Yeah.
- What are you guys talking about?
- Come on, Max. You've been blowing us off
for a while now. I mean,
look at that video,
we're like extras or something.
Chris is amazing and
he deserves the credit,
but we're on the A team too.
To you guys we're like, the C team.
- I hear what you're saying.
When we make the sequel we'll just--
- Max, you ain't listening.
Ain't gonna be no sequel, not for us.
- I don't like where this is going.
Eddy, help me out here.
- Body shots?
- Thanks buddy.
Guys, tell me you're not
thinking what I think you're thinking.
- Sorry Max. I know this is
bad timing but we're through.
- Juice?
- Dog. I'm done, son.
- Hello?
Is anyone home?
Max?
(somber music)
Well, at least nothing's changed.
Max?
- Oh, hey baby. How was your trip?
Give me a kiss.
- Look at you.
I thought you guys were
over this kind of thing--
Well, not him, but you Max.
I mean, do you know what time it is?
You should be out with the team,
I left you with a full itinerary.
- We had a rough night.
(Danielle scoffs)
- Well, I can see that. Come
on let's go, we got work to do.
- Actually, we don't.
- What?
- Chris, the rest of them, they quit
just after the video release.
- Why?
- I'm not sure.
Chris went to the dark side.
- Kingsley?
- Yep.
- But he can't. He signed a contract.
Right? He signed...
Max, don't tell me...
- Okay.
- You didn't get the
fucking contract signed!
- We were busy with the video
and all the media and--
- And, and, partying.
- A little.
(Danielle scoffs)
- Do you have any idea what this means?
I could lose my job. If TSA doesn't have
a team in the super comp, I'm fucked.
Do you understand? Fucked. And so are you.
- I didn't know they were gonna bolt.
We had this trust thing
happening. Those ingrates!
After all I've done for them.
So I give Chris a little
too much attention.
- Oh, I warned you about that.
- Yeah. You also warned me not to
bone other girls while you were gone,
but did I listen?
Yes! Of course I did.
Hey, where you goin'? Danielle?
Wait, it's all good--
- No, Max. No, it's not
all good, we're not all good.
- What are you saying?
- I'm saying what I should have said
before I got back together with you.
Fuck off.
- You don't mean it. Come give me a hug.
- You're pathetic.
- Dude, you gotta love a girl with balls.
- She'll be back.
(floor thuds)
(Max farts)
- [Kingsley] Well, well, well.
Looks like the tables have turned, Max.
- Why? Do you like vaginas now?
- What's he talking about, King?
- Shut up Spinks.
Joke all you want Max.
Won't change the fact
that I've just taken your best talent
from right under your nose.
(Spinks laughing)
No come back, eh?
Must hurt a little bit
finding that once again,
I'm on top.
- The King always
ends up on top.
- Quiet time, Spinks.
- I don't know exactly what you did,
but I'm gonna figure it out.
- What I did?
I out-managed you, Max. And it was easy.
I hear you lost the rest
of your team as well.
Bonus.
(laughing)
I'd be a lot happier if I cared
about recruiting marginal talent.
- [Max] You son of a bitch!
Motherfucker I'll kill you!
- [Spinks] Get your
hands off of him! Security!
Security! Come on!
- Get him off me, get him--
(Max screaming)
Get this guy to a drunk tank.
I think he might be high on PCP.
He probably sells it to kids!
- [Max] Let go of me!
- You know what that does to kids!
- It's over Kingsley! You're done!
I'm not playing anymore! I'm
gonna punch you in the larynx!
Or, stab you in your retinas!
I'd kick you in the adam's
apple if I thought you had one!
Get the fuck off me!
- [Kingsley] Have fun in oblivion,
you fucking shit head.
(knocking on door)
- [Max] Can I help you?
Oh, you communicate by notes.
- Hey, man. What's up with the mutes?
- Oh, fucking great! We're being evicted.
- When did we become poor again?
- TSA paid for this place,
they want us out of here.
Come on in, boys. Thanks
for stealing my stuff
without letting me do a thing about it.
- There's some guacamole in the fridge,
and if you guys wanna hot tub
you're gonna have to share a towel.
- [Max] Well Eddy, looks like we're back
to living in the truck.
(engine revving)
- Nope.
- Why not?
Don't tell me you've
gotten all high and mighty.
You can't rough it anymore?
- Oh, I'd live in it if it
wasn't being towed right now.
- Beautiful. I'm gonna
go find a McDonald's
and see if I can get some shifts in.
- Nah. I got an idea. We
still got some money left.
I know a perfect place to stay.
- Alright.
- [Eddy] Not too shabby, right?
And I hear it's a great
place to pick up chicks.
- Yeah, well, that's not
really important right now.
We just need to get some rest.
We're down right now man,
we need all the energy we can get.
Tomorrow, we put our lives back together.
- Well, this is the place.
Apparently it's quite peaceful.
They give you hot water bottles,
warm glasses of milk.
We'll be asleep in no time.
- Sweet.
- [All] Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!
(intense rock music)
(Max screaming)
- [Max] Remember, we're
gonna walk in there
with our heads held high.
- [Eddy] My head's always high.
- [Max] Yeah, that's part of our problem.
- Yo, Max, I just, I wanna thank you
for letting me and Mikey
on the team, you know.
- Yo, yo, my brothas. I swear
to God we will not disappoint.
- Yeah you will, because you
guys can't ride worth a shit.
But we're gonna have a team
in the super comp no matter what.
So, let's hit this opening party
and show 'em who we are.
- Word.
- Let's get naked.
- Let's do this, Eddy.
- Hey. How's it goin?
- [Woman] Good to see you.
- Good to see you.
Hey. Can I buy you a drink?
- I'm already drunk, I think.
- I just wanted to say I was sorry.
For fucking up your whole deal.
I know you worked really hard to get here.
- Nah, don't worry about it.
I was thinking of going
into real estate anyway.
I think I'd be pretty good at it.
- Well, well, well, well, well,
well, it's the love birds.
What's the matter? Love on the rocks?
Looks like Danielle's had
a little too much scotch
on the rocks, huh?
(laughing)
- Oh, King! You kill me
man, that was a good one.
- Watch your mouth, King-shit!
- Back off Max. I don't wanna
have to kick your ass again.
- Whatever.
(Spinks scoffs)
Good luck Danielle.
- Thanks, Max.
- Easy. Easy, easy. It
ain't worth it, King.
Relax, it's okay.
(Kingsley laughing)
- [Max] Mikey, K-Dog, let's cruise dude,
we're out of here. This
party's fucking bullshit.
Eddy let's just go dude.
- Fuck this party, yo!
(mumbling)
- Do you mind if I see you naked?
- Fuck off
- Get the fuck out of here, K-Dog.
- Sorry dog, I'm curious.
(techno music)
Yo, yo, yo, my boys!
You hungry? I found
some pizza in the trash.
- No I'm cool, I just need some sleep.
- It's all good.
I'm just glad to be on
the tizzeam, you know.
It's too bad Chris is off it,
me and Mikey boy knew he'd make the cut.
Kid went and bought himself
a porn star girlfriend!
- Yeah, Lisa's hot man.
I don't know about porn star hot though.
- How could a porn star
not be porn star hot?
That doesn't--
- He's dating Lisa, she's in PR, not porn.
- Yeah, stage name Veronica Vixen.
I knew I knew that girl from somewhere,
so me and Mikey went home,
check our stats, sure
enough, bang! There she was!
- Oh yeah. Super Sluts, issue 243.
Boom!
- Two, four, three.
- No way.
- Yo, I knew that indexing
would pay off man.
I must have pulled it a
million times to that girl.
- Chris is dating a super slut?
That man is god.
- Nah, Eddy. It just doesn't add up man.
Why would Veronica Vixen be
doing PR work for Kingsley?
Oh, fuck!
I knew that mother-felter
was up to something!
- Yo, let's to tell Chris.
- No, dude, leave him alone. He's happy.
Besides, ignorance is
bliss. You should know that.
- Yeah.
- [Mikey] Yeah son!
- [Both] Whoo!
(hands clap)
(clear throat)
- Are you guys done
with that magazine?
(relaxed scat music)
- [Mikey] Aw shit man,
Max isn't gonna like this.
- [Eddy] I told you.
This is operation Yeti.
Yeti is team leader. Leader por tu.
- [Both] Yeti!
- [Eddy] Alright, this is his floor.
Clearly you guys don't remember this shit.
Alright, follow my leader.
(fast paced bongo music)
Okay, this is the room.
Stick it under the door.
(knocking on door)
♫ So classic, it was
perfect as it needed to be
♫ It was back when
friends were true homies
♫ Drinking 40's with few worries
- Veronica Vixen?
- What's up, baby? Oh shit!
- What the fuck is this, Lisa? Veronic--
whatever the fuck your name is.
- Sorry, Chris. It's just business.
- Business?
Look, what are you talking about?
- Hey, you're a good kid,
I don't wanna hurt you,
but I have to make a living,
just like everybody else.
- I don't get it, you said...
- Look, it wasn't my idea.
- Somebody put you up to this?
- Kingsley Brown hired me. He wanted me
to get you away from Max
and whatever sponsors you were with.
It was easy money.
- Yeah, it was easy.
Easy for you.
- Yeah. Actually, it was
I had a good time. You're a nice kid.
Anyway, I'm just gonna go grab my stuff.
Awkward.
(rap music)
(door slams)
- [Announcer] Just a
reminder that the train runs
for the updown super comp--
- Hey, what's up?
- Not much.
- I heard about Lisa. Sorry.
- Yeah, it was really my fault, I mean,
I just, I'm such an idiot.
I really though it was real.
- Well, it was. For you.
And I hope it happens again.
I mean, no other porn star or whatev--
(laughing)
- Yeah, so do I.
- Well, good luck today.
- Thanks.
- Okay.
- [Announcer] Welcome to
the updown super comp.
(rock music)
- Little cousin.
- [K-Dog] Aw yeah!
- I'm glad you finally made it, man.
- Hey, it's only the beginning my brother.
Only the beginning.
- Good luck, man.
- Thanks, dog.
Alright.
(snow crashing)
- [Announcer] Here comes a renegade from
Team Max Shred, Juice
Clark on that first rail.
And Juice Clark goes down with the bail!
Could it be just the jitters,
or is it a lack of coaching?
Let's check in on the slopes south comp.
- Mikey, you nervous?
- Hell no, hoe. Max got me
all jacked up for this shit.
- Max used to get us really pumped.
- Yo, I'll see you on the podium, girl.
(upbeat techno music)
- Nice try.
- [Radio] This guy sucks!
Send the next competitor.
- [Announcer] Let's to back to the top
where another Max Shred exile
is about to drop in, Tracy Alexander.
She comes in to that first rail.
She's so good, Tracy Alexander.
Not what you'd expect
from Tracy Alexander,
but like Juice Clark this could be
just getting used to a lack of coaching.
Alright, ladies and gentlemen
we're gonna go to the judges--
- Max! Eddy!
- Danielle, what's up?
Did I wreck something with the chalet?
Was it that vase?
It was Eddy's idea to play indoor cricket.
- Hey. Don't be pissed 'cause
I scored 14 wickets on you.
- Okay. No, no, no. Max, you know
I need to enter a team
into the competition
and it has to have someone with a name.
- All the names are sponsored.
Looks like you're getting fired.
- No, no. I'm not getting fired
because I have thought of somebody.
- Who?
- You!
- Are you high?
- No, Max.
It'll draw attention to the brand,
I mean, you won't win,
but as long as you
compete I'm off the hook.
And you kind of owe me big time.
- You know he's like 136 years old, right?
- Come on, Max. Just do it for those kids.
They need you now. Show
them what this team
is really about. You're
the great Max Fisher,
the innovator, the veteran.
You could still show
these kids a thing or two.
- As the principle at their high school.
- Come on!
- Alright, I'm in.
- Hey, hey!
- Danielle, grab my board.
- Okay.
- Eddy, grab me a beer.
(electronic music)
(Kingsley whistling)
- Chris-ter? Ready to shreddy?
- Are you kidding me?
- I don't kid about snowboarding.
This ain't about fun, son.
This is about winning,
and that's exactly what
you're about to do.
- Aw, man. That just gave me chills, man.
- I tell it like it is.
- Then why don't you tell me about Lisa?
- She's a wonderful woman,
you're a lucky man.
- Yeah. Me and every other pervert
that's ever jerked off on her pictures.
- What?
Where'd you get that?
- Yeah. Who's the rat?
- Spinks!
- You know what, there's
only two rats here
and I'm looking at them.
Fuck this, I'm out of here.
- I told you that girl was a dirty bitch.
Filthy little whore.
God, she pisses me off. I should just--
- [Announcer] Daryl "Juice"
Clark is at the start
of the rail section,
looking to redeem himself.
- I don't believe it.
- What? You thought I was
too old for this shit?
- Nah, I thought you was too lazy.
- I am. But what the fuck man,
speaking of lazy, I saw your first run.
- I sucked.
- Yeah, but only because
you didn't get enough
pop out of your knees, man.
You were dragging your ass.
You gotta stay low to the
last second, then pop!
- Thanks.
- Rip it up Juice.
- Thanks.
(upbeat rock music)
- Fuck yeah! Juice on the loose!
- Heard you were competing.
- Oh, well, yeah, in the half pipe later.
This slope style shit gives me jello legs.
- So, what are you doing here?
- I saw your last run, thought I'd,
help you find your balance.
I think it might be around here somewhere.
- Yeah. I know, I shit the bed.
- You're just leaning back too much.
You gotta attack. Lean into it.
Attack.
- Okay. Got it.
Thanks.
- Good luck.
- Yeah, you too.
- I'm gonna need it.
(Tracy laughing)
I'm gonna shit a whole lot more
than a bed if I fuck this one up.
I'm gonna shit the whole mountain.
- [Announcer] Alright,
here comes Tracy Alexander
after leaving Max Shred. She
struggled on her first run.
Can she crank it up for
a stellar showing here?
Alright, ladies and gentlemen,
make some noise for Tracy Alexander.
(crowd cheering)
Coming into the tabletop,
the big 360 with the grab.
Coming into her final hit here,
with the grab. A huge air trick!
(crowd cheering)
I don't know what got into her
from the last run, but that was sick.
(crowd applauding)
Let's move on now to the half pipe
where we have a surprise
entry, Max Fisher!
- You sure you wanna do this, buddy?
I mean, you're out of shape,
you're old, you probably
haven't practiced.
You're probably scared
shitless of falling right now.
Dude, falling would suck. The pain.
- Eddy, have I ever told
you you suck in motivation.
- Motivation's overrated. I
get all the motivation I need
from these bad boys right here.
Wanna hit?
- Nope.
Today, I set an example to
young athletes everywhere.
From now on, it's all about
hard work and clean living.
- [Announcer] The crowd is
so stoked to see this one.
And not try to get old Max fucked up.
- Aw, fuck.
(inhales deeply)
- Attack!
(inspirational rock music)
(laughing)
♫ Never give up on you dream
♫ You never believed in me
♫ A false hope is all I need
♫ Never give up on you dream
♫ You never believed in me
♫ A false hope is all I need
♫ Another breath wasted trying to explain
♫ I'm at my wits end
(snow crashing)
- Oh no!
- [Announcer] And let's jut
hope he's not badly hurt.
Though he's not moving too much.
And there's his former member
of his team, Max Shred,
running out to see if he's okay.
- [Both] Max!
- Max, are you okay?
- Max, are you hurt?
- Let me get these off.
- I think I just broke my back a little.
Did it look cool?
- Actually, it was awesome.
- [Eddy] Max, you're alive!
- I guess,
Team Max Shred isn't
pulling out the win today.
- Max, it doesn't matter.
The crowd loves you, it did the trick.
Everybody's talking about the team.
- [Eddy] You're killing it, dude.
- Well, does that mean we're
back on screwing terms?
- You are such a pig, Max.
And maybe.
- Yeah! I knew it!
(laughing)
- Eddy, yo, pussy, are you crying?
- No. It's just my glaucoma, turn away.
(laughing)
- Pussy.
That ain't glaucoma. You need a hug, man?
Come give me a hug real quick, come on.
Get up old man.
- [Max] Easy.
- [Juice] We got to go
to the massage parlor,
Sunday, I got this girl, Kiki.
- [Announcer] Ladies and
gentlemen, what a weekend we had,
and what a night we have here tonight,
the updown Super Comp throw down.
(uptempo rock music)
(mumbling)
(fireworks explosion)
- Watch out, my brother's jumping.
- [Announcer] Let's make
some noise, for Chris James!
(crowd cheering)
- Yeah, baby!
Yeah, baby!
- Yeah!
(crowd cheering)
- [Announcer] What a
weekend! What an event!
- What?! What?! What?!
Max Shred! Yeah!
♫ Time to strike you pose
♫ Then to finding peace
♫ Hoping to disappear
♫ Buried underground
♫ I'm already there
♫ So stop bringing me down
(inaudible)
- I'm VIP, let me in.
- Think about your future.
- Kingsley! Spinks! Let's party, dudes!
Oh, darn. Not on the list, what a shame.
- Wait a second, you
didn't even check them.
- Be sure to send me
that post card Kingsley.
I hear oblivion's nice this time of year.
- Get the--
You work out?
- Shut up, Spinks.
- Seriously, do you squat or something?
Arm curls? Bench? Cool.
- Mikey. Maybe we do suck.
But yo, we're on Team Max Shred.
(laughing)
- Kevin,
do you think that with these hats
were finally gonna get pro hoes?
(lighthearted music)
- [Both] Oh. Ooh.
- [Mikey] You guys smell so good.
- [K-Dog] Yes. Thank
you, thank you Max Shred!
- [Mikey] We made it!
♫ Millions of people looking for love
♫ Is it a secret from heaven above?
♫ Willing and waiting, wishing for more
♫ Will somebody save
me and unlock my heart?
♫ Season's are changing
♫ The passage of time
♫ Living in sequence
♫ Don't step out of line
♫ Can anyone see this?
♫ Is everyone blind?
♫ And walk through the darkness
♫ Just follow the light
♫ I see what I say, I say what I see
♫ Does everything seem so different to me
♫ I saw what I said, I said what I saw
♫ Coming in different just running it hot
♫ Read the writing on the wall
♫ Precious paper doll,
the pages fall apart
♫ I just can't shake you from my head
♫ And all the things you said
♫ They only break my heart
♫ Step out of your comfort
♫ And into your fears
♫ Jumping through windows
♫ Sucking up tears
♫ Reason with knowledge
♫ Changing of gears
♫ Remember be honest
♫ Forget all those years
♫ I see what I say, I say what I see
♫ Does everything seem so different to me
♫ I saw what I said, I said what I saw
♫ Coming in different just running it hot
♫ Read the writing on the wall
♫ Precious paper doll the pages fall apart
♫ I just can't shake you from my head
♫ And all the things you said
♫ They only break my heart
♫ Read the writing on the wall
♫ Precious paper doll the pages fall apart
♫ I just can't shake you from my head
♫ And all the things you said
♫ They only break my heart
♫ Remember that first kiss
♫ When time was lost and love was missed
♫ Recall my fingertips caress your neck
♫ And lick your lips
♫ Read the writing on the wall
♫ Precious paper doll the pages fall apart
♫ I just can't shake you from my head
♫ And all the things you said
♫ They only break my heart
♫ Read the writing on the wall
♫ Precious paper doll the pages fall apart
♫ I just can't shake you from my head
♫ And all the things you said
♫ There's nobody home
♫ I'm here on my own
♫ I should have known
♫ Right from the start
♫ Was it all wrong?
♫ Should I have gone?
♫ I should've listened to my heart
♫ Now that you are gone
♫ The days just move along
♫ Nothing matters
♫ Nothing stays the same
♫ Tell me, is it too late 'cause
♫ Now I belong
♫ Now I belong here with you
♫ Now I belong
♫ Now I belong here with you