Random Acts of Intimacy (2002) - full transcript

(gentle music)

(upbeat music)

- I went out. I was drunk
before I already went out.

I was like really happy and saw this lad

and thought "Oh, I'm going
to have him tonight."

So I like to start talking to him.

He didn't really speak much.
He just like stood there.

And I said to him, "All
right, are you up for it?"

And he said, "Up for what?

And I'm like, "Are you up for sex?"

(intense music)



- He came and he sat beside me.

And at the beginning, I
thought he was very handsome.

He had long blonde hair down to his waist

and he had those big corn flowers eyes.

Guys with really long hair,
they look a bit like girls

and I thought, "A man
who looks like a woman."

I found that very appealing.

- And he was also very, very muscular.

And I felt very feminine in his company

in that sense of being aware

of this kind of incredibly
strong, such a brutal force.

- Whereupon, just
completely out of the blue,

and she asked me,

"Have I ever kissed a French girl?"



Immediately, I said, "No."

She just very delicately
put her fingertips

on my cheeks and just kissed me.

And I was absolutely astonished.

I was just, I must have gone bright red.

- I wouldn't have been surprised
by a kiss or something.

That wouldn't have shocked
me at all that, you know,

but I got, I opened the door
to the loo, just walked in,

she was there, and we sort
of recognized each other.

And it was only a matter of seconds

before she dragged me into
the loo and fucked me.

(soft moaning)

- So some of them were artists.

Some of there were drug
dealers, prostitutes.

It's very crowded and
there's this big buzz.

And because there are so many
people having a good time,

you feel you can do what you want,

and you just listen to great
music and have a good time,

and it's a bit decadent,

but you really have a good time, you know.

(soft jazz music)

- I was dancing against
these bars like pole dancer

and touching myself up when I danced.

Our bouncers love it

and I love it that
people like watching me.

I used to do it when I went
out with my friend, Donna,

'cause she's like loud like me,

so I can do stuff like that.

But like other people go out
are quiet, so I feel silly.

I know I was looking at average
guy and I was really nice.

And then I go now look
slightly Leonardo de Caprio?

Paul Nichols, Joe wicks, or Easterners,

Babyface.

Cute.

He said he's seen me dancing in the past.

- As I say, when I went back
into the compartment, so the,

the elderly couples?, it pulled
the blinds down and the dim,

the lights.

And I basically just shuffled
into my seat and just avoided

looking directly at this young lady.

Anyway.

- There was a very gorgeous
woman on the other side of the

cafe, who I thought was giving
me the eye, but I didn't,

I didn't actually want to
blame my vanity too much.

So I sort of let it go.

But over the course of the evening,

we were definitely visually
sort of flirting with one

another.

But at one point I got up to
go to the loo and I hadn't

realized that she'd actually
gone into the loo before me.

- And he said, he said
to me, I'm a bricklayer.

So maybe it was a bit
naive, but I believed him.

- And actually it turned out
that he worked on the bit he

built railways? around
what is, so he was more,

I understand is a NAVY

- And then later on, he
touched my hand and I said,

you can't be a brick layer.

Your hands are soft, like a
bank, mine?, natural, something,

you know.

- Huge thick fingers, you know, the, and,

and the sort of hands that you
look at and think they could

crush me with one.

Crush.

- And he said, no, actually
I just came out of prison.

Policeman had a go at me and
that I hit him over the head.

And then they put me in prison.

- He was living a lifestyle
that I sort of thought had gone

out with the

19th century in a sense
of this sort of idea of

these men, building roads or building

railways,

lots of sympathy for his very
lonely life without women.

- I hear that he, he went
to prison and he beat up.

So policemen, I like that a
lot, in a disrespectful way.

That pleased me a lot, or the
excitement of being a bad boy,

you know, like he does,

he's a villain and he's good looking.

And, oh, he is too much

- I was quite enchanted by her.

I was beginning to get, to
become in love with her.

- I fancied him a lot and I
wanted to do something with him.

So he said, you want,

you want to go to that little parking? So

and he said, you want to
go in there in the dark?

And I said, yeah.

Okay.

So we went in there and
then we started kissing.

- And then, so we got
talking a bit more, like,

we were just sat on these
benches, like kissing and that,

and they're like, this is
our drone pilots and oh, no,

I want to do it here. And
he's going, no, no, we can't.

No, we can't.

And we just got carried away
and it just started from there.

- He just lift up my skirt
and he started stroking my leg

and pulling my skirt up and
then stroking my thighs.

Then I bend down.

And he started kissing my leg
from the bottom of my leg,

you know, to the calf.

And then he keeps me on just
on top of my suspenders.

I could feel his lips against
my stockings and I found

very erotic.

- She was very relaxed
and I was quite on edge.

- And then I looked up in
horror and because of the street

lights I saw two heads of
police men going by stop

stop.

There are two parties,

especially who was coming out of prison.

Maybe it's the guy hit over the head.

So I took just stop because
it's too dangerous. You know.

- When I'm not,

relaxed.

I tend to shake a little.

- I think I frightened a little bit.

I don't think you were really into it.

Cause he just seemed too quiet not normal.

- Well, fear can feel nearly
60 sometimes because when

you're frightened in your
stomach, you feel to make sex more

sexy there must be an
element of danger or risk.

Imagine what he could have done to me

because I can,

I can have sex with a
really dangerous man.

So I've got guts.

- And she, she put her hand

on my arm like this and she's
sitting across line and she

learned to cross, put my hand on my arm.

And she said, what's the matter?

I said, no, sorry.

It's okay. It's okay.

- He had the smoothest
skin I ever touched.

his skin was like silk.

He had a face soft, enjoyable, skinny,

and he was beautiful.

- And she lent across the,

the compartment, and started to

kiss me.

And at the same time,

she picked my hand up and
laid it on her breasts.

And , my God, this is

not the week before.

What are you supposed to do?

- I was quite clear when I got on the bus

that I thought we were fairly likely

to have sex and really kind of turned on

and excited about this idea of,

you know,

that we were going to be able to really,

really be naughty.

- By this time. My heart was really going,

boom I think you could
hear it at the time.

But as soon as she did this, I
looked the word leads people.

It was knowing the right door,
and open but, and then she,

she climbed on top of

my lap

and she took total control.

- And he was, he was very cute
as well in a way that he was,

you know, he was quite, quite sort of shy.

And, and I was very in control

in the sense that I knew I could

completely control the proceedings.

It's like a week or two would
go as far as I wanted to go,

there was no sort of sense of,

of me being in any kind
of danger from him.

- He saw my dog collar and he
said, oh, you're a sexy bitch,

really know, not because I'm a bitch,

boys like a female dogs you know.

- I was like, he was sat like
this, you know, sat on top.

People were watching,
but I just didn't care.

Well I didn't really know at first,

'cause I just didn't think

no one would think anything
of it with it being dark.

Then afterwards everyone were
like clapping and cheering,

because a girl came up and stopped.

And one of his friends started
talking to us in-between,

(laughs) this girl who
knew his girlfriend said

also she wants to talk to us and.(laughs)

- We had sex all the time.

Forget sleeping

There's no, you can
sleep anytime you know.

With the beautiful guy like this,

you're not going to sleep you know.

- And the, the sad thing about it all was,

this was just too, too
unusual, too excitable for me.

And the actual act, once
penetration had occurred,

the actual act of,

of sex was,

was literally 30 seconds.

And I felt sort of, dreadful.

Things were running through my mind

like she probably thinks all
English men can't make love

and ejaculate within 30
seconds and this is it.

You know,

()

- As we left the cubicle, I
don't know how long it was.

I think time was kind of lost.

I asked her for a telephone number,

and even her name,

but she wouldn't have
anything to do with it.

And I left, never, never seen her again,

never knowing who she was,
and never meeting her again.

- So clearly that was her
intention all along anyway,

I treasure the memory from my perspective.

- I have this fantasy that, that in a way

he will always keep the
story to himself because

you know, it's the sort of things

that he might tell somebody
and they might just go,

(laughs) yes, mate, you know,
I'm sure that four? women?

just threw themselves at you.

- Everyone knows the school.

When I went back for my exams,

everybody was looking ,
is it true?is it true?

It's like,

ah, we having sex in the
middle of the dance floor.

(laughing) No

- She was so bold,

but also some way quite some
like, fearful I suppose,

not to hang around.

Maybe she was straight, or
not straight, but closeted.

- It's like catch up

to utopia, from utopia
utopia going next time Love.

Love, saying go next time to
utopia, I'll give you one.

But no, thanks.

- I just felt it was
really naughty, and daring,

and it was just very sexy.

Incredible, very good. Very good.

And I think I must've come out looking,

looking like I'd just been
fucked, I must have had.

And that was part of
the shock I think too,

that the idea that you
could have anonymous sex was

really good anonymous sex,
with a stranger (laughs),

but it was just? a
figment of my imagination.

- I always invent something because,

I don't know,

sometimes I make sex a
bit like cinema, you know,

you, you make a scene for it.

It's just, you create
your fantasy, you know,

use your imagination.

It's like diving in the sea
or climbing up a mountain.

It's like, if you, if
you brave the danger,

it gives you importance,
he makes you somebody,

he makes you, I mean, it's not,

he makes me macho but
if I can brave a danger,

I'm something. I'm important.

I mean, I don't know.

I'm worth something.

- I like to talk about it afterwards.

Tell people and shock people.

I like people to talk about me.

So they all think that they're being nasty

by slagging me off but actually I like it.

Yeah 'cause my life must be interesting,

if they talk that way.