Plain Clothes (1987) - full transcript

[HEAVY BREATHING]

[DRAGGING FOOTSTEPS]

BOY 1: Forget it, man.
She hates your guts.

GIRL: I can't talk now,
I have to run. Bye!

[MAN GRUNTING]

[TAPPING MICROPHONE][MIC FEEDBACK]

MAN: Testing, testing.

We are now
bombing Russia.
[CHUCKLING]

Where's the
goddamn button?

[ECHOING] What?

Oh!



Your SAT results are in,
and frankly I'm
damn depressed.

You know, if you people
spent more time
on the three R's

and less time
onThe Three Stooges,

not so many of you
would have to waste
your time

at that damned
Junior College
across the street.

[BELL RINGING]

STUDENT ANNOUNCER: [ON PA]
Uh, good morning.

These are the
announcements for Monday,
April 25th.

A note to all
sophomore health students,

tomorrow at lunch,
there will be a required
screening of the film

Why Susie
Can't Go Swimming
in room 20.

God. Almighty deity
or first half
of a cuss word.

Find out tonight
from Brother Mike at
the Young Life rap session.

GIRL 1: Where's Mr. Bradwood?



GIRL 2: Who cares? BOY 1: Probably dropping
his pen again.

GIRL 3: Hey, anybody
got the answers
to the homework?

BOY 2: You're only
cheating yourself.

GIRL 4: You look used
as usual, Stacy.

GIRL 3: That's because
I was with your boyfriend.

BOY 3: Hey, babe.
You wanna sit on my lap?

GIRL 3: Dream on! [DOOR CLOSING]

[MAN EXHALING DEEPLY]

ALL: Good morning,
Mr. Bradwood.

[GROANING][GIRL SCREAMS]

Easy Grader.

BOY 1: Oh, god,
look at his back.

[STUDENTS CLAMORING]

BOY 2: Hey, does this mean
class is canceled? BOY 3: Ew!

[ICE CREAM VAN MUSIC]

[TIRES SCREECHING]

All right, be quiet.

Hey! Hey! Shut up!

Now, Mr. Icey
is very hot right now.

Mr. Icey does not
like children,

so let's not piss him off
anymore than he already is.

Ice cream.

You, the drooler.
Go first.

I want a rainbow pop,
please.

One rainbow pop.

There you go,
that'll be 80 cents.

I'll have a fruit bar.

One fruit bar.

Give me the money.

Now get out of here. She took my money.

What? BOY: She took my money.

You're busted. Give me that.

I got it. Ed!

Freeze!

No, no, no, no, no. [GRUNTING] Ah!

You're a cop?

Surprise, surprise.

Maybe you should
radio out for
some back-up.

[CHILDREN CLAMORING]

Up you go, miss. Ow!

Where've you
been, Ed?

I was thirsty, Nick.

[SCOFFING] You mean
they actually assign
cops to this?

Tell me about it.

Get in there.

Hey Dunbar,
bring me a cup
of coffee, would ya?

Two sugars. Yes sir.

Go ahead, Nick.
I'll get them started.

Pretty much
the key guy around
here, eh, Dunbar?

MAN: You did?

[LAUGHING]

Oh, that's fine, baby.
Yeah.

[LAUGHING]

You did number two
all by yourself?

[LAUGHING]

Oh, mommy gave you
your picture book.

Oh, that's fine, baby.

Oh, lookie here.
Daddy'll be home
about 6:00, okay?

I love you,
sweetheart.

Bye, bye now.

My Maggie's
first solo flight
on the can.

You must be
very proud, sir.

Oh, yeah.

Well, what's up?

Sir, it's about
the assignments
I've been getting.

What about them?
You and Malmburg
having maritals?

Oh, no, sir.
Ed's great.

It's just that
every gag we get

seems to involve kids
of one breed or another.

Yeah, so?

So, I hate kids.

It is goddamn un-American
to hate kids, Dunbar.

I can't help it.
We just don't get along.

Never did.
Even when I was a kid.

You are a kid.

Sir, I'm 24 years old.

That's hardly a... It's hot out there.

I got more homicides
than I got hair right now.

The last thing
I need is one
of my own guys

coming in here
creating new problems.

So if you have
a bug up your ass

about working with kids,
animals, or aliens,
or whatever,

you better get over it.

Work it out, understand?

Yes sir.

Nick, you better
pick up line 41
right away.

It's Dave Hechter
over in homicide.

Hechter's in homicide?

Now how the hell
does an idiot like that
get a shot in homicide?

Nick.

He's saying
that your brother Matt

knifed a teacher
over in Ballard
this morning.

What?

This is Dunbar.

DAVE: Hechter, here.
We have a very dangerous
situation down here, Dunbar.

Your brother's flipped.
He's got a hostage.

What?

Uh, SWAT's here.
Gotta run.

Don't touch him.
I'll be right there.

[PEOPLE TALKING INDISTINCTLY]

[SIREN WAILING]

ED: What are we doing
at a kiddie park?

NICK: Matt works here.

Excuse me.
Where's Dave Hechter?

OFFICER: Never, never land.

ED: Look, Nick.
This is how Hechter
gets himself in the news.

DAVE: Put one of your men
in that Rub a Dub Dub

Three Men in a Tub,
all right?

Where is he, Dave?

Keep your shirt on.

What the hell?

Dave?

Wait! Sargent,
give me your vest. Yes sir.

Oh, come on, Dave,
just tell me where he is,

I'll straighten this out,
and we can go home.

Hold your
horses, Dunbar.

Bullhorn.

He's up top
of Rapunzel's tower.
Let's go.

You stay here,
Malmburg.

Couple of things
you should know.

One, he's got
a shotgun. What?

Two, he's got a hostage,
a maintenance man
named Sal.

Listen, we're having
a hard time getting
in touch with your mother.

What's her name, Bobbie?

Yeah, she's out of town.

Your dad with her?

My dad's dead.
You know that.

Boy, you really put on
a great show, Dave.

Matt Dun...
What the hell? Turn that.

Turn that that way.
Jesus.

Matt Dunbar!

This is the police.
Your brother's coming
up to talk to you.

Here he comes.

Nick'll straighten
this out in
two seconds.

Oh, I ain't
worried, Matt.

Hey, Nick. Hello, Matt.

You all right? I didn't do anything.

Oh, I know you didn't.

Nice shirt. Thank you.

Uh, Nick,
this is my hostage,
Sal Becker.

Sal, this is
my brother Nick.

Pleasure, Sal. My pleasure, Nick.

I help Sal
out around here.

Yeah. I'm the one
who told the cops
Matt had a shotgun.

I figured that
oughta keep them away.

Good thinking, Sal.

Nick, this, this is all
just a really big
misunderstanding.

I was in detention
when Bradwood
got killed.

For what?

For punching
Mr. Bradwood.

There you go, Nick.
Just a big misunderstanding.

MATT: See, that morning
I wake up

and the first thing
I find is a note
from Mom saying

that she's gone backpacking
in the Yucatan for two weeks,

with this guy, Fergie.

I'm two seconds late

and as usual,
Bradwood is immediately
on my case.

So you two
didn't get along.

And then he springs
this quiz on us.

And I'm like super
ready for a quiz, Nick.

I mean all
I had for breakfast
was a Twinkie.

So you cheated.

Bradwood catches me,
he stands me up
in front of the whole class

and tells everybody
it's no wonder
I'm such a loser,

I cheated my way
through life.

So you punched him.

No, I told him
he was full of shit.
So he slapped me.

So then you punched him.

You're damn right.
I told him I'd kill him

if he ever
touched me again.

You told him
you'd kill him?

I'm sorry, Nick.

It's all right.

Look,

if everything
you said is true,

then you got
nothing to worry about.

[CHUCKLING]

Sal, you gonna
help me out here,
or what?

All right.

Okay. Look,
we're going to go
out there now.

Now I promise you,

nobody's going
to hurt you.

Nah, I trust you, Nick.

I know you
wouldn't let anything
happen to me.

All right.

Okay, we're coming out.
He's unarmed.

Come out with
your hands behind
your heads.

Okay, don't worry about it.
Stay right with me.

Okay, just walk
toward me.

It's all right.

Stop right there. Hey, what is this?

What is this?
Hechter, what is this?

He's just a kid,
for Christ sake.

Nicky! NICK: It's okay, Matt.

MATT: Nick! It's all right.

It's all right.
I'm right with ya.

NICK: Don't worry!

Appreciate
your help, Dunbar.

You son of a bitch. Whoa, whoa, come on.

You better look for me.

NICK: You better look out.
Don't worry, Matt.
I'll take care of this.

ED: Hey, I really
don't think this is
such a good idea.

NICK: I can handle Hechter.
I just want to know
what he's got on Matt.

Jeez, Ed.

ED: I'm just getting it
out of the way.

Yeah, I think
you're safe here.

Forget that.
I don't want you
to get excited.

What are you
talking about?

Just don't lose
your temper.

I don't know
what you're talking about. Oh, okay.

But I'm doing
the talking.

Hey. Hey, hey.

What are you, blind?

Get this thing
out of here,
you freak.

All right, come on here.
Move it!

NICK: I hope they plant
Bradwood better than
Bradwood planted his garden.

ED: Hi, Dickie.

DAVE: See,
I'm a detail guy, Donna.

Some people say
detail guys are anal.

I say we're
just thorough. WOMAN: Yes sir.

ED: Hey, Dave,
how's it going?

DAVE: Hi, Ed.
How're ya doing?

ED: Fine. I just thought
I'd stop by to see
what's what.

Nothing, that's
what's what.
Case closed.

Promotions all around.
Donna, get this
to forensics.

Case closed already? Open and shut.

Like the mouth
of a giant clam.

ED: Gee, Dave.
You're the best. DAVE: Thanks, Ed.

But I know
that boy, Matt.

And he's
not a killer.

Oh, I beg
to differ, Ed.

The school counselor
says the kid was cocked
and loaded to begin with.

I mean, just take
a quick peek-a-boo
at his home life.

Mom's lived
in five states
in five years,

had twice
as many jobs,

three times
as many boyfriends.

Boy, Dunbar's mother
really seems to be
an easy lay,

if you know
what I mean.

Oh, hi, Nick.

Dunbar!

You're on suspension,
now take a hike!

Looks like I'm going
to have a little free
time to help you out.

MATT: Great,
now you can get me
the hell out of here.

What were you doing
with a knife in your locker?

It was the one
that Dad gave me.

Mom told me
to get rid of it,
but I just couldn't.

Why were you
still in detention
when school started?

Kyle Kerns
was supposed
to come get me.

He never showed up. Who?

Kyle Kerns.
He's head of the Wardens.

Who are the Wardens?

They're sort of
like hall monitors.

You think it's possible
he set you up?

My new philosophy is,
anything's possible.

Ever seen him before?

"Out damned spot?"

It's from Macbeth.

Who's he?

Macbeth?

No, the guy
in the picture.

Oh, he was looking
for something at
Bradwood's house.

So, now what?Well...

For anybody to frame ya,

they would have
had to have known
you were in detention,

and everybody
that knows that
is at the school.

Great, so lose the suit,
and pretend to be a kid.

I mean you're
supposed to be good
at that kind of thing, right?

Matt.

Matt, nobody's
going to believe
I'm a high school kid.

Oh, be serious, Nick.
Nobody believes
you're a cop.

Well, the idea stinks.

I mean the last thing
in the world I want to do
is go back to high school.

I'd rather die.

Come on, Dad.

You owe me
big time for this.

Pardon me.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Nick Springsteen.

Nick Springsteen.

Right here.

Any relation, dude?

Distant.

Got any bootlegs, dude?

Excuse me.
Excuse me. Springsteen?

It was Matt's idea.

Uh-huh!

Hey.

Mr. Springsteen?ED: Yes.

I need for you
to fill these
out for me,

and sign them, please.

ED: Right now?

No, after he graduates.

MAN: Jane!

Jane! I'm hungry!

Sally, get the
principal a jelly.

Right away, Mrs. Melway.

GARDNER: It's always
the same thing.

Always a goddamn jelly donut.

Just once I'd like
a piece of...

JANE: The furnace went on
with the air conditioner.

We haven't been able
to get it off yet.

Where did you say
you were from again?

Delaware.

Where did you go
to school there?

George Washington.

All right.

We have a schedule
for him.

But we need a transcript
from his old school ASAP.

Is Friday good?

Tomorrow would
be better.

I will finish this
for you.

It's going to
take me a minute.

Now, son,

let's not have a repeat
of what happened
at the last school.

I love you, son.

Get out of here, Ed.

He's my only boy.

Bye, Nicky.
You take care.

Hey, excuse me.
You take care.

Damn it.

I can manage, thanks.

Oh, that's okay.
It's no problem.

I'm new.

Neat...

Maybe we'll have
some classes together.

Yeah, maybe.

Hey! Over here.

Okay.

Your homeroom
is with Miss Torrence,
or Ms. Torrence,

or whatever the hell
she calls herself
these days.

Ms. Torrence is fine,
thank you.

You're a teacher?

Surprise, surprise.

Hello.

308, homeroom.

Locker upstairs
in the back.

Here's a map,
here's a schedule,

here's a combination.

You can read the map
if you'll stop
dripping all over it.

I'm sorry.
This heat's murder.

Get used to it. Next!

STUDENT ANNOUNCER: [ON PA]
Attention mathletes.

This year's inter-school,
oral calculus competition

will be held next Friday.

Better start
working out now.

WOMAN: This is the nurse.

Warren Weinberg,
your medication
is in the front office.

We're with you, Matt.

GIRL 1: He was cute.

GIRL 2: It makes
him cuter now,
if you think about it.

GIRL 1: Ew, look out
for the blood.

GIRL 3: I heard both
Bradwood's eyes
were poked out.

BOY: See you later.

Good riddance.

A kid trimmed a teacher
a couple of days ago,
right after the late bell.

My name's Carter,
how're you doin'?

Fine. This is Jeff.

But everybody
around here just
calls him Deaf Jeff.

Oh, he must love that.

[CHUCKLING]
What does he care?

So what's your name?

Uh, Nick, Springsteen.

No shit.
Any relation?

Distant. Real distant.

So, Carter,
were you anywhere near
when this happened?

Sure, I saw
the whole thing happen.

You saw the teacher
get killed?

Well, no, but
I was in the room
right after

when Mr. Bradwood
came stumbling in

and just died right
in front of everybody.
It was sick.

The chick next
to me puked.

Just like that?

Nah, she screamed first.

No, I mean Mr. Bradwood.

He just, he just
walked in and
died just like that?

No, he said "Easy grader,"
then he died.

The guy...

The guy's last words
were "Easy grader?"

Yeah, you know
the whole thing
makes you want

to re-evaluate
your own life,
doesn't it?

I mean, one minute
the guy's here teaching
Modern Government,

and the next minute
he's plant food.

Jeff.

Thanks.

Oh yeah. GIRL: Scott, get in here!

Easy grader.

[DOOR SHUTTING] Easy grader.

GIRL: Cathy, come on! Hey.

You got a pass,
bunghole?

Do I need one? [BELL RINGING]

Well, you do now.

[SNIGGERING]

Are you new?Yeah.

You got a name?Nick.

Nick.
As in Nick knock?

[CHUCKLING]

Yeah, that's right.
Knock's my last name.

Well, my name is Kerns.

As is Kyle Kerns?

Yeah. Bingo, bunghole.

You see
what it says
on my shirt?

It says 'Warden'.

That's right.

Don't forget that name.

Our job around here
is to stop trouble
before it happens.

To kick trouble's ass.

Or maybe even,
say, kill it,
if you had to.

You see
what it says
on your shirt?

It doesn't say anything
on my shirt.

That's right.

Don't forget
that, either, Nick.

That's an awful lot
to remember, Karl.

Kyle.

Now, you start walking.

This is going to be
a nightmare.

MAN: Okay, now
there's a million and one
uses for these things.

All right, kids,
use your heads.

See, they can
be a, uh...

I guess a lamp base, huh?

A table leg.
Am I right?

Young man,
you paying attention?

Huh?

Who, me?Yeah.

Uh, yes sir,
a million and one uses.

Great.

Okay, there's a
sign-up sheet right
here for the lathe.

There's a whole bin
full of these babies
up front.

Okay, let's go.
Come on.

And sharpen
your tools, please.

Everybody wants
to use them.

Nobody wants
to sharpen them,
am I right?

[SIGHING]

Let's you and me
have a little talk,
all right?

Matey.

Right now,
in my office.

Okay, keep your minds
on your work, kids,

and your fingers
on your hands.

NICK: You're a counselor,
Mr. Butler?Oh yeah.

Yeah.

Of course,
after proposition nine,
a few years back,

I had to give up
counseling full time,
and return to teaching.

But...

[SIGHING]
What's your story, son, huh?

Dope, a broken home.

Your old man
slap you around,
make a pass at you.

Come on,
you can tell me.

My dad never made a...Don't give me that.

I can spot an aggressive,
poorly integrated teenager
a mile away.

Okay, Mr. Butler,
you, you got me.

Nick, son, it's my job,
okay, to spot kids like you,

and, to teach you
somehow to turn that
aggression that you have

into more constructive...

More constructive...

Things.

Exactly.

Years ago, Nick,

I had a girl in Wood 1,
who was very talented
with the lathe.

The work this girl did,
I don't know, it'd make
you weep, Nick.

[SIGHING]
But, I'm afraid
before she came to me,

she was just another
bimbo on a bus
to nowhere.

A what?

Real loser, Nick.

[STAMMERING]
I'm talking marijuana,

bad grades,

attempted suicide,
braces.

[STAMMERING]
You name a problem,
Mary had it, okay?

Acne. Completely
disgusting acne.

There you go.

Are we talking honker,
or what? I mean...

Nick, one day

I caught Mary
stealing some ditto
paper from the mimeo room.

My god.

I gave her a choice.

Either I could call
the police right then
and there, or, huh?

She could pick up
a hammer, Nick,

and build something
for herself.

Now woodshop
saved that girl's life.
I happen to know it.

So, how's Mary
these days?

Oh, who cares, Nick,
the point is I know

how to handle kids
like that, okay?

So now anytime
you get these
destructive urges, huh?

You want to reach out
and, I don't know,
wreck something,

you come to me,
and we turn these,

I don't know,
call it negative energy
you have,

into something,
more...

Better?

Exactly.

Okay, come on.

Gee, it's a shame
you couldn't have helped

the kid that killed
that teacher.

Yeah, yeah,
well you know, Nick?

In some ways,
I really kind of blame
myself for that one,

but, you try
to give a kid a break,

but some kids
seem to be born with
one foot in the slammer.

They, they just,
they're gonna
wind up there,

take the plunge,
no matter what
you do for them, huh?

I see.

Go on, kid.
Build something.

Let's keep
some action in here.

Come on, ladies, pull.

You look like a bunch
of rejects from
the girl scouts.

For God's sake,
Springsteen, get a jock.

Don't you know
your balls are developing
until the age of 20?

You'll end up
singing soprano.

Uh, yes sir.

Coach! Move it! Come on,
let me see that.

[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

Two cash payments.

ZEFFER: Come on,
let's see that.

Okay, shower up.

Nice work out,
Coach Zeffer.

MAN: [ON PA] Attention.

A memorial for Mr. Bradwood
has just been announced

for 10:00 a.m. this Saturday
at Derf Memorial Park.

There will be a pancake
breakfast immediately
following the services.

Remind me
to get some flowers.

Here.

Gee, it's a real tragedy,
losing a teacher like that.

Yeah,

if anybody deserved
to take a dirt nap,
it was Bradwood.

[BOYS TITTERING]

There any reason
you keep talking to me?

Just being friendly.

Yeah.

But you're also naked.

That bothers me.

Right, sorry.

You know, Nick,
there's only three kinds
of people in this world.

There's my kind
of people

and there's pussies.

That's only two kinds, Cal.

Kyle.

And I think
that you are
a goddamned pussy.

ALL: Oh!

What is wrong
with you?

What's the matter,
cat got your tongue?

Huh?

You just gonna
stand there?

Come on, come on.
You wanna take a shot?

Come on, I know
you wanna take a shot
at me, don't ya, Nick?

Huh?

Come on.
Hit me, hit me.

Hit me.

What the hell's
the matter with
you, man?

Hey! Knock it off!

[INDISTINCT MURMURING]

Pussy.

STUDENT ANNOUNCER: [ON PA]
And now, Belinda Ann Farrell,
Poetry Club,

with an announcement
about Friday night's
May Festival.

GIRL: This Friday night,
a wonderful sight, It's okay.

colors ignite,
spring delight.Sorry.

Say you will, not tonight,
and show up, Friday night.

NURSE: [ON PA] This is
the nurse. Warren Weinberg,
your mother called.

Your dermatologist
appointment has been
changed to 4:30.

STUDENT ANNOUNCER: Food
Service says that in the near
future only cold lunches

will be served until the gas
problem and the rat problem
are taken care of.

My god, Hechter,
what happened to you?

Well, some guy hit me,
but you ought to see him.

Call it a bad
sense of humor,

but the PTA gets
a little uptight

when the kids start
killing the teachers.

DAVE: Well, we should
have the whole thing
straightened out in no time.

GARDNER: I certainly hope so,
because now you see,

they feel like
like they're targets.

And we can't just
have them out there
for someone to shoot at.

DAVE: Well, I'm a detail guy,
Mr. Gardner,

so we should have
the whole thing worked
out in no time.

Hey!Sorry.

DAVE: Do whatever
we have to do to get
the perpetrator behind bars.

GARDNER:
I certainly hope you do,

because if you don't,
there's gonna be

you know, the pressure
of this business...

You know,
you'd be surprised

just how much
looking where you're
going can help.

GARDNER: Doesn't the boy
have a brother who's a cop?

DAVE: Oh yeah, well,
that's using the word cop
very loosely.

Hey, aren't you
the new kid?

Ned Mellencamp,
is it?

Nick Springsteen.

Yeah, close enough.

Hey! [WHISTLING]

Nick, it's over here. Oh.

Thanks, Nick.

Those are mine,
remember, Nick?

DAVE: By the way,
the DA is talking about
trying the kid as an adult.

The hearing's
tomorrow morning. Thanks.

NICK: Spot.
As in "out damned spot?"

You read Macbeth?

Oh, yeah.

Spot stands
for State Pension
Organization of Teachers.

It's for grown-ups, Nick.

Just like the
teachers' lounge.

You'll excuse me
please?

You're gonna,

[NERVOUSLY CHUCKLING]
really think
this is stupid,

but I forgot
the assignment you
gave us this morning.

[SIGHING]
It's not stupid,
it's just typical.

I asked everyone
to bring an example
of a metaphor.

What a great idea
for an assignment,
Ms. Torrence.

Excuse me.

It's a little early
to start brown-nosing,
don't you think, Nick?

That a girl,
Miss Torrence.

[SCATTERED CHEERING]

I think there's
a connection between
Bradwood, Zeffer

and this mystery man
with a breathing problem.

Now I gotta figure out
a way to check out this
meeting at Zeffer's house.

No sweat, just hang out
with Zeffer's daughter.

His daughter? Yeah, she's a senior.

Her name's Dawn-Marie.

You must've seen her.

Great rack,
decent face,

blonde hair down
to her knees.

She's in one
of my classes.

That's Zeffer's daughter?

Step-daughter,
actually.

I know she tutors
geometry, or
something like that.

I don't think
she'll talk to me.

Well, I'm surprised
anybody talked to you.
I mean, look at you.

What's wrong
with the way I look?

You look like a thug.

Matt, I don't have
time to go shopping
for clothes anymore.

I have a metaphor
to come up with,

I have a history quiz
to study for.

So what?
Flunk the quiz,

hell flunk everything,
what difference
does it make?

So you won't graduate.

Nick, the only
way you're gonna
get anywhere

is if you get people
to talk to you,

to trust you.

And to do that
you gotta use

what I call "the mystique
of the new guy."

How do I use that?

Lie. Make up shit
about yourself.

I've been doing that.
I've been telling everybody
I'm from Delaware.

Delaware, Nick.
They make chemicals
in Delaware.

You should tell people
you lived on a boat.

A boat that you made,
and there were chicks on it.

Chicks?

See, your problem
is that you've always been
more like an adult than a kid.

I mean, remember
when you asked your
biology teacher to the prom?

Hell, she went. Yeah, but...

Dawn-Marie's not gonna
give you the time of day

unless you lighten up.

So go ahead, Nick.
Be an animal.

I mean, it's for
a good cause.

[BOY WHOOPING] [INDISTINCT TALKING]

The sun rises up,

up through
the hoop of darkness,

like a flaming
basketball.

I wrote that.

That was lovely, Mark.

It was also a simile,
not a metaphor.

[ALL LAUGHING]

Jill. You get
a metaphor?

My life is trash.
I wrote that.

[STUDENTS TITTERING]

Comfy, Nick?

Be great if I had a cup,
or something.

Let's hear
your metaphor, Nick.

Okee dokee.

I've selected a poem.

She Being Brand New
by E.E. Cummings.

[NICK CLEARS THROAT]

"She, being brand new,

"and you know,
consequently a little stiff,

"I was careful of her.

"And, having thoroughly
oiled the universal joint

"tested my gas,
felt of her radiator

"made sure
her springs were okay.

"I went right to it.

"Flooded the carburetor,
cranked her up,

"slipped the clutch,

"and then somehow
got into reverse.

"She kicked.

"What the hell.

"Next minute
I was back in neutral,

"tried, and again

"slowly, barely,

"nudging my lever

"right, oh

"and her gears being
in A-one shape,

"passed from low
through second into high
like greased lightning

"Just as we turned
the corner of Divinity Avenue

"I touch the accelerator

"and give her
the juice, good,

"it was the first ride

"and believe I, we

"was happy to see
how nice she acted

"right up to
the last minute,

"coming back down
by the Public Gardens,

"I slammed on the
internal expanding

"and external contracting
brakes both at once.

"And brought all of her

"trembling,
to a dead standstill."

[STUDENTS EXHALING]

[LOW COUGHING]

Yeah, I had a car
like that once.

[ALL LAUGHING]

So basically,
a metaphor means

you're talking
about one thing,

but what you're
really talking about
is doinking.

[ALL LAUGHING]

That's exactly
what a metaphor is.

Although it doesn't
always have to refer
to, umm, sex.

You can be talking
about war, or death,
or love, or anything.

It's a very mature
choice of material, Nick.

Yeah, well I'm a very
mature guy, Ms. Torrence.

[ALL TITTERING]

Hi!
Can I help you?

Uh, yes, Nicky,
forgot his lunch.

Hi, son. [STUDENTS TITTERING]

It's a special diet,
he has a very
delicate stomach.

Nicky?

[BELL RINGING]

Damn.

[BELL RINGING]

Hello, sir.

Did you just
call me sir?

Yes, sir.

[MIC FEEDBACK ON PA]

MAN: Emergency
after-school
pregnancy test.

Well, who
the hell's pregnant.

I'm not reading this.

Jane!

[MIC FEEDBACK] NURSE: Warren Weinberg.

This is Nurse Horner.

I think you've still
got my thermometer, uh,

somewhere on your person.

Please find it
and return it immediately.

[WHISTLING]

40?

[GIRLS LAUGHING]

What are you
doing in here?

Mrs. Melway.

What are you
doing in here?

I was looking
for a pencil.

In here?

Well, why not?
This guy doesn't
need them anymore.

Gonna eat
lunch, Jane?

Not with you, Chet.

I still haven't
received the transcripts
from your father.

Oh, well, knowing him,
he probably forgot.

Well, then,
perhaps you should
remind him.

Now, why don't you
go eat your lunch,
young man.

And you can
leave the pencil.

Thank you.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

MAN: Parker, use your fork
to eat with.

Poke her once more
and you're outta here.

Guys are just clueless.

I mean,
the manhandling,

the way they just order you
around all the time.

I get so sick of that
macho crap.

You know what I mean? No.

Hi.

Hey, it's the poet.

Could I talk to you
for a second?

Sure.

Oh, thanks.

This is Camilla, Terez
and this is Nina.

Hi. Nice to meet
all of you. This is Nick Springsteen.

Any relation?

Distant.

Actually it's pronounced
"Spring-stein."

So, what did you
want to talk about?

Can I come over
to your house?

You want to come
over to my house?

Well, to study geometry.

You tutor it,
don't you?

Why haven't you
had geometry before?

I mean, aren't you a senior?

Well, my old
school's pretty much
in the dark ages.

Oh. Where was
your old school?

Delaware. Harbor.

Delaware Harbor?

Yeah, I lived
on a 60-foot sloop.

A racing sloop.

You lived on a boat
with your family?

With friends.

Hey, sweets.

Did you miss me? Tons.

Yeah, hey, listen,
ah, D.M.,

me and Bob are
going to McBride's
house tonight

and we figured,

you might want to
come along, you know,

watch us
raise a Blazer
a couple of feet.

What's he doing here?

He wants me
to help him
with his geometry.

When did you
have in mind?

Tonight would be great.

Great.

What are you,
a thrill seeker?

No, I'm just a really
bad student, Ken.

Kyle.

D.M., there's no way
you're gonna help this guy.

Look, don't tell me
what to do!

Maybe you should use
a more sensitive approach.

Sensitive approach?

I'll give you
a sensitive approach.

Whoa! Kyle, if you hurt him...

You're dead, bunghole.

Holy shit!

Springsteen popped
the principal!

[ALL CHEERING]

Great.

GARDNER: Now you've been here
less than 24 hours,

and already
you're pissing me off.

That's not
a good sign, son.

I'm sorry, sir.

How's your jaw?

Oh, I've taken worse.

Now, look, Nick.

As you may have noticed,
things are kinda hot in here.

I've got more troubles
than a blind guy
in a mind field.

So the very
last thing I need

is some new kid
coming in here
and making my life

more miserable
than it already is.
Understand?

Precisely, sir.

Sir? Good.

Now, along with your
other punishment,

I'm going to ask you
to have a chat
with Mr. Butler,

the school counselor.

My "other punishment?"

This is gonna hurt me
a lot more than
it's gonna hurt you, Nick.

I seriously doubt that, sir.

Besides, isn't that
against the law, now?

Oh, I make the laws
around here, son.

Now, bend over
and grab your ankles.

Okay, good boy.
Come on, boy.

There, there you go.

Hey, Nick.

See you, dude.

All right, Nick.

Way to go, buddy.

Hi, Nick.

Hi. Hi, Nick.

Hey, boss. BOY: Hi, Nick.

Hey, Nick.

You fought the law
and you won, dude.

Not quite.

Wow, what a year.

First, Matt Dunbar
sends Mr. Bradwood
into eternal slumber,

and now you tag
the principal in front
of half the school.

There hasn't been
a year like this

since Benny Berman
laid his dick out on
the overhead projector

in old man
Wiseman's class.

Well, at least
I'm in good company. Yeah.

Me and Jeff here
were about to go
downtown for a while.

Maybe scope
some Betty's,

power a few brews.
You wanna come?

Scope Betty's?

Yeah.

Maybe some other time.

I guess I'll see you
later then. Okay?

Okay. All right.

Hey, Nick!

So, did you punch out
the faculty at your
old school, too?

It was an accident.
I respect my teachers.

Give me a break, Nick.
Nobody respects
teachers anymore.

So why teach?

I like kids.

You look like a kid.

Yeah, well,
you get used to it.

Last year I got
asked to the prom.

Yeah, I know
what you mean.

I've always had
kind of a baby
face myself.

Well, you look
17 to me.

Yeah, well, I'm 18.

JANE: That's not maybe.

It's not maybe.
It's no!

Do you understand "no?" I didn't ask you
for a maybe.

If you would just
tell me sometime.

No wonder
she's so mean. JANE: Leave me alone.

I mean, first
she loses her husband

and then she has to
come out of retirement
and work as a secretary.

Then her fiance
gets murdered.

Mrs. Melway
was engaged to
Mr. Bradwood?

No!

How did her
husband die?

The way I hear it,
he was home hooked
up to an iron lung.

The housekeeper
accidentally
yanked the plug

with the vacuum cleaner.

No.

I swear to God.

Umm, do you
need a ride, Nick?

You mean, home?

Yeah.

To where I live
in my house?

[CHUCKLING] Right.

Uh, I better not.

It's no trouble.

I mean,
how's it gonna look?

You're a teacher
seen alone with me,
a student, in a car.

People will
start talking.

We might even
forget ourselves.

The next thing
you know we kiss,
the whole thing gets ugly.

I'm just offering you
a ride home, Nick.

Let's not kid
ourselves, Ms. Torrence.

[BELL RINGS]

DAWN-MARIE: Hi, Nick.
Come on in.

Look, my dad
is having some
geek teacher meeting

so we're going to
have to study
up in my room, okay?

Hey, nick.

Coach.

MR. WISEMAN:
The kids are spritzing
all over themselves,

no one is paying
any attention,

so I decide to
open a window.

All of them
are nailed shut.
I couldn't believe it.

ROBIN: Well, it because
of last year. Remember?

When the kids started
throwing the desks
out the windows?

MR. WISEMAN:
Oh, yes, Robin.
Now I remember.

Robin. Robin.

MR. WISEMAN: You know,
I've been spending

a lot more time
in the bathroom lately.

I wonder if they're going
to have the red punch
or the green punch?

And how are we going
to get the nails
out of the windows?

I don't know.

So first we state
that MNO

and PQR must be
45-degree angles.

We just come right out
and state that?

Well, now we're
gonna prove it.

So, if lines AB and
CD are parallel,

then angles MNO and
PQR must be congruent.

And if the intersections
of lines

EF and GH

form a 45-degree
at NGU then...

Nick,

you're not
paying attention.

What?

Nick, this is
very important.

I mean someday
you're going to need
all this stuff.

Geometry skills carry over
into all kinds
of everyday things.

Yeah?
Like what?

Like...

Well, it teaches us
simple deductive reasoning.

Or figuring out
the area of
your backyard.

[GIGGLES]
I don't know.

Miss Horner says
it's important.
I know that much.

[CLEARS THROAT]
Dawn-Marie, trust me.

Geometry is not
going to play
the key role in our lives

that you think it is.

Believe me, I know
what I'm talking about.

Are you saying that

you don't want
to study anymore?

Oh, no.

No. That not what
I'm saying.

It hot in here,
isn't it?

Well, the fan's
pretty nice.

You know,

I thought I was
going to die

the day when you
read that poem, Nick.

For a minute
I couldn't even
feel my legs.

You know,
you and Kyle Kerns
make a pretty nice pair.

Me and Kyle are history.

I mean, ever since that
Bradwood thing

he has been
an absolute jerk.

Bradwood thing?Mm-hm.

Mr. Bradwood
made a pass at me.

Shocked?

I'm no virgin, Nick. Oh, no.

Of course not.

Look,

the Coach can barely
afford to feed us,

let alone send me
to a decent college.

Mr. Bradwood said,
that he would
improve my grade.

Well, what's
a little kiss?

Actually, it was more
than a kiss.

How much more?

I aced that class, Nick.

I gotta run to
the oval office.

It Camille you like,
isn't it?

Who?Camille.

Nick, she a slut.
A real slam hound.
Trust me.

I'm just gonna
go to the bathroom.

It down the hall,
second door on your left.

I'll be right back.

The official
groundbreaking

is Monday in Arizona,

May 2nd,
at which point
SPOT will pay

Dunsinane Construction
three million dollars.

Now let me take
this time to say

without more investments
like the Casa Del Sol Project,

SPOT on its present course
is heading towards disaster.

So that concludes the finance
committee's presentation.

I'd like to take
questions from the
general membership.

Miss Torrence.

ROBIN: Coach Zeffer,
as a younger teacher,
how do I know

that the money will
still be there by
the time I retire?

ZEFFER: That an
excellent question.

And as I said earlier,
I can assure you

that real estate investments
such as this one
are very safe.

I'm sure I speak
for all of us
on the finance committee

when I say that
our goal

is to make
you younger teachers'
retirement

even more comfortable
than...

MAN: Mr. Wiseman.
What kind of a percentage
of return will we get?

I would estimate
20% or better,

with 10% tax free.

MAN: Mrs. Melway,
do you have any question?

MELWAY: I don't
have a question.

But I have a statement
I'd like to share.

40.

[INDISTINCT VOICES
IN OTHER ROOM]

Well,

I really appreciate
you helping me,
Dawn-Marie. I...

I learned a lot.

You're welcome.

I really hope that you're
planning on going to the
May Fest tomorrow night.

I'd be really bummed
if you didn't go.

Oh, I'd hate to
bum anybody.

I mean, I'll,
I'll think about it.

Well, goodnight.

[LAUGHTER]

After a kiss like that,

you just know he's
going to go straight home
and spank the monkey.

[LAUGHS]

Well, we're down to
two prime suspects.
Kyle Kerns and Coach Zeffer.

Now Kerns could have
done it outta jealousy.

It turns out that Bradwood
was doinking Dawn-Marie,
Kerns' girlfriend.

Doinking?

Yeah, but it's not like
Dawn-Marie is a
slam hound or anything, Ed.

A what?She just did it
for the grade.

I would've got more out
of her on the whole deal

but by this time
the girl was all over me.

The Coach daughter
was all over you?

Oh, yeah, and you
should see this girl, Ed.

Nice face.
Great rack.

Dunbar, several state laws
immediately come to mind.

And that's how I found out
the combination
to Zeffer's safe.

Bradwood had written
34, 24, 40

in his grade book.

Now, at first
I thought that was
Dawn-Marie's measurements.

And then I realized,
that idea is totally bogus

'cause there
no way Dawn-Marie's got
40 in her wheel wells.

I wish you
could hear yourself.

Hi, guys.

You enjoying your
vacation, Nick?

Take a pill, Dave.

Where was I?

Totally bogus wheel wells.

I think Coach Zeffer
is planning on ripping off

his pension fund
for three million dollars.

Where the hell
did you get that?

If Dunsinane's
a front for Zeffer,

then we know
the three million
is going into his pocket.

If Bradwood found out
about this and
started blackmailing him,

then Zeffer has
a motive for murder.

A-plus, Nick.

Well, it simple
deductive reasoning, Ed.
That why we study geometry.

Yeah, but you're still
going to need proof

whether it was
Kerns or Zeffer.

I wish to God I knew what
Bradwood meant
by "Easy grader."

And who's the wheezer
in the Cadillac?

And why am I
eating this shit?
I've got to go.

I'll see you later,
okay? I'll call ya.

Nick,

a kid hung himself
in my cell last night.

I've never seen
anything like that before.

NICK: I'm getting real close.
Just hang in there with me.

[KNOCKS GLASS]

Nick, get me outta here.

Now, of course I realize
that there are some people,
you know, who need...

To be violent.

For them, it's, I don't know,
some kind of a...

Rush.

You see what I'm getting at,
at all, here, Nick?

Oh, absolutely.

I'll never hit
that principal again, sir.

Yeah, yeah.

Boy, that guy
really looks familiar.

Who, what guy, Nick?

NICK: That little, wimpy guy,
with the glasses?

Isn't he like
a senator or something?

Oh, no, no, no,
he's dead, Nick.

He's dead?That right.

How did he die?

Well, he fell
off a bridge.

He fell off a bridge?Right after graduation,
can you believe that?

It's like... No.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

Well, can I do
something for you,
Ms. Torrence?

Yes, I'd like to see Nick
Springsteen's transcripts.

Why?

Why? Well, he's doing
very good work

and I was just wondering
what other kind of literature

classes he had
at his other school.

We aren't suddenly developing
a little yen for the boy,
now are we, Ms. Torrence?

No, I was just curious
about his grades,
that all.

Mrs. Melway,
when you were a teacher,
you never...

Never!

Jane, I was wondering
if you weren't

busy a little bit later,
maybe we could...

Yes, I am.

Are you sure,
'cause we could

get a bite to eat before
the festival, you know. I am busy.

I thought that just,
never mind.

You know what?

His transcript
still isn't here.

NICK: They're a gang.

No George Washington
High School anywhere
in Delaware?

OPERATOR: No, Ma'am.
I've checked all the
municipal records.

There was one,
but it closed,
eight years ago.

What?

OPERATOR: I said it closed
eight years ago.

It closed
eight years ago?

OPERATOR: Yes, ma'am,
I'm sorry.

ED:
Detective Malmburg. Ed, it's me.

Listen, I think I got
a line on the Wheezer.

ED: Yeah? His name's Simon Feck.

Thank you.
Thank you.
Very much.

Chat's over, Nick.

Oh, gee, Kyle.
Is this really fair?
There only three of you.

Ah,

that more like it.

Who is this guy, Kyle?

Shit,
that's who he is.

You know what we do with
shit around here, Nick?

From your breath,
I'd say you eat it.

BOY: Yeah,
Smash his face.

Kyle, come on.
Kick his ass, Kyle.
Come on.

Get in there.
Kick his ass.
Fight back, you wimp.

Code blue
in the corridor,
Mr. G! Code blue.

Go!

BOY: Fight back, you wimp.
Kick his ass, Kyle.

[GLASS BREAKING] BOY: Kick his ass.

Oh, no.
All right, all right.
Break it up, break it up.

Sick of all this
goddamned punching.
Look at that.

You, Kyle,
in my office.

What are you
talking about?
He started it.

Now! He started it!

Come on, let's go.
Let's go.

I won't forget this.
You're meat, pal.
You hear me?

MR. GARDNER:
Get in my office. Now,
you just bought yourself

a trophy case.
Come on, let's go.

It's ripped.
Maybe you should
just take it off.

Ah, here he is now.

For Christ sake, Nick.
What the hell
happened to you?

I got into a fight. You got into a what?

It's no biggie,
the principal
broke it up.

Well, I guess
I'll see you tonight, Nick.

No, you won't be
seeing Nick tonight.

Nick's grounded tonight.

A bit harsh,
don't you think, Ed?

What do you
mean harsh, Nick?

You're supposed
to be helping
your brother Matt,

not getting yippee
with some cheerleaders.

What did you
find out on Simon Feck?

Got a lot of things
on Feck.

He's got a file
as thick as
a phone book.

No kidding?

A master debater.
I'm shocked.

He's a scam artist, Nick.
Real estate.

Just finished
serving time in Utah.

What about
Dunsinane Construction?

Some little closet space
down by the canal.

Well punch it, Dad.

[ROCK MUSIC]

You've lost it.

NICK: It's up here.

[KNOCKS ON DOOR]

NICK: Looks like
we caught him
at a bad time.

ED: It's a letter opener.

Nice.

ED: There nothing here.
This joint's a front.

Hell, this is
not making sense.
I mean, why off the guy?

Without him
they don't have a scam.

Maybe he was
gonna rip 'em off?

I don't know, Ed.
I'm thinking.

[PHONES RINGS]

MAN ON ANSWERING MACHINE:
Dunsinane Construction.
Simon says,

leave a message
at the beep.

[BEEP]
Simon? Jane Melway here.
Listen.

I think there a cop
in the school.

The finance committee is
having an emergency meeting
during the May Fest tonight,

9:00, teacher's lounge.

Oh, I hope
you're feeling better.

This humidity must be
like a knife in your lungs.
Bye.

[PARTY MUSIC]

Now, whatever
you do, Dad,
don't embarrass me.

Oh, I promise, Nicky.
Just show
some respect for Daddy.

WOMAN: I don't care
what the point of it is.

Go run around the maypole
by yourself.

Hi. How much?

Five bills each.

Dad?

Yeah, well this
is coming out
of your allowance.

Okay, thank you.
There you are.

Don't forget to vote. For what?

King and Queen
of the May.

Here's your pencil. Thank you.

WOMAN: Hey, Sheila!

Hi, how're ya doin'?

Hey, Nick!

Look at that.

Hey, Nick.
How ya doing, man? Hey.

Hey, is this your Pop?Yeah.

My name is Carter.
And this is Jeff. Hello, Carter.

Hello, Jeff. Having fun, boys?
Don't eat too much popcorn.

Not here.
Not here.

Hey, I'm going to
go check out
the dunking booth.

I'll see you
at 9:00.

Where?

Oh, oh, okay.

ZEFFER: Hit me with
what you've got, honey.
Come on, show it to me.

Aw, you could do
better than that,
come on.

Oh, let's go, lady.

Here, let me
help you out.

Nick, what are you doing?

Just, look at the target.
Don't watch your hand.

Springsteen,
he's not gonna help ya.

Throw real easy,
and snap your wrist.

You got to get some, whoa!

Lucky, lucky,
Ms. Torrence.

Nice shot, Robin.

DAWN-MARIE:
Nick, you made it.

I didn't think
you were going
to come.

I thought maybe
we could check out
the Ferris Wheel.

I've got to go
do some time
at the ticket table.

You two have fun.

Nick, come on,
let's go.

Coach,
it's almost 9:00.

Come on,
the meeting.

I just got dunked
for crying out loud.
I'll be right there.

Why don't you
go by yourself,
I gotta find my dad.

You said we were
going out to dinner.

Well, I thought
we'd get a couple
corn dogs.

Glad you could
make it, Lieutenant.

My pleasure.

Jim, this is my
girlfriend, Rhonda. Hi.

How do you do? Jim's the
principal here.

Whoa!

Boy what an absolutely
scintillating frock. Thanks, Nick.

Tonight's
the night, Nick.

Gee, that sounds
really romantic, Kyle,
but right now I gotta...

I'll be waiting
for you up in
the east stairwell.

This time no teachers,
no interruptions,
no kids, no nothing.

Just you and me.

Yeah, okay.
You and me.

GIRL ON PA: Testing, testing. I'm going to be
waiting for you.

Okay, everybody,
we're just about ready

to announce the King
and Queen of the May.

But first we want
to thank you all
for coming tonight.

We've raised
over $5,000!

[CROWD CHEERING]

We are going to have
the best-looking band
in the state.

[CROWD CHEERING]

Quiet everybody.

I'm proud to announce,
that this year's
Queen of the May, is...

Dawn-Marie Zeffer.

[CROWD CHEERING]

Nick. Did you
see Hechter? Huh?

What? Yeah, Hechter's here.

Hechter's here? Right there with
Miss Tacoma.

Come on.

And this year's
King of the May is...

Nick Springsteen.

[ALL CHEERING]

That's you.
Nick Springsteen.

Right on, dude.
Give me some flesh.

I voted for you, man. Thanks.

Come on,
let's go, kid.

Nick!

Nick.

That couldn't be.

Hey kid,
who was that
you were talking to?

He's the King of the May.

Who the hell
do you think he is?

[CROWD CHANTING "NICK"]

Nick, come up here.

We know
you're out there.

Springsteen's a cop.

ZEFFER:
I can't believe that. WOMAN: What?

That's right, a cop.

A cop! I knew it.

I knew he was too polite
to be a student.

You're all under arrest. [SCREAMING]

Are they...

Are they all
under arrest, Nick?

What are you
arresting us for?

Was Bradwood
blackmailing all of you?

Yeah, thanks to Jane.

He made me
tell him everything.

He made you?

Well, you might say
that he twisted my arm.

We're not
criminals, Nick.
Not really.

$200,000 a piece.

What about murder?

Whoa-ho-ho.
The boy did that.

No, the boy
didn't do anything.

How do you know?

Because the boy
is my brother.

That's why you're here?

Someone just killed
Simon Feck.

[ALL CLAMORING]

You and your
schemes, Zeffer.

Shut up, sit down.

ED: A couple of you people
take care of that woman,

and the rest of you
sit down.

Where's Butler?

He knew
about the meeting.

WOMAN:
I saw him at the fair.

ZEFFER:
Why isn't Butler here
with the rest of us.

All right.

We're gonna be
right back.

In the meantime,
I want you to stay put,
and behave.

I'm putting
Coach Zeffer in charge.

Thanks a lot.

I'll take the
basement, Nick.

[INDISTINCT MURMURING]

You've got to get
the wise man to do
some wisdom now...

Shit!

[RUSTLING]

[BOTH SCREAMING]

I thought
I told you all
to stay put?

Well, I am too scared,

and I am packing up
and getting out
of here for good.

What are you
afraid of, Mrs. Melway?

I don't know
what you're talking about.

Oh, I think you do,
Mrs. Melway.

Okay. All right.

You're right.

Nobody's being
murdered because
of the pension fund scam.

People are being killed...

Because of me.

[LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY]

You see, 25 years ago,

I had an affair
with a student.

Mr. Butler. Yes.

It was a week later

that the accident happened,

and my husband was dead.

[SIGHING]

You know,

at first I really
didn't think
anything about it.

And then,

the young man
started writing letters.

And in one
of them he said

that he had killed
my husband.

Well, I didn't believe him.

And then, he said,

I spend my hours

cutting and sawing
and thinking of you.

Did you save
these letters?

Of course I did.

Every single
one of them.

And I put them
in this metal box

and I kept them
in case anything
should happen to me

and I'd be missing.

But now it is
the metal box
that's missing,

and it's been
missing for months.

Besides I really
didn't think that
Chet meant those things.

Chet?

[CLANKING]

You stay here.

Sit down.

Well you won't leave me
alone too long?

Mrs. Melway,
try to relax.

We're supposed
to be on a date.

Yeah, well, look.
I'm sorry. Here.

Here, you take
these ride tickets.

I don't want
those ride tickets.

But, just go
for a ride on the...

I'm not going
for a ride. Then get yourself a hotdog

and go for a ride
on the Ferris Wheel.

Yeah, right. I'll be right back.
I swear.

Some date you
turned out to be.

[DOG GROWLING]

Oh my god!

[CLANGING]

Ow! Oh!

Miss Torrence,
what are you
doing up here?

I was just coming
to look for you.

You're the
King of the May.

How'd you get in?Through the front door.
The dog's in the back.

How long ago? About 10 minutes.

Then he must have
just chained the door.

[HEAVY BREATHING]

CHET: Got an itch, Jane? [SCREAMING]

Oh, whoa, Chet!
Oh, God.
Thank God it's you!

I thought it was
the cop coming back in.

Oh, give me a second.

Now you can
help me pack

No, I don't want
to help you
pack, Jane.

Chet, there is no
reason for this.

I am not going
to say anything.

Caca, Jane.
I just heard you
say everything.

Miss Torrence,
there's something
I've got to tell you.

No, Nick.
There's something
I have to tell you.

God, this is so hard
for me to say.

[JANE SCREAMING]

[GRUNTING]

Nick!

Stay there!

[DOG BARKING]

Dunbar!

Open the door!

You son-of-a-bitch!

Get away!

Get away! Let go!

Mrs. Melway?

[CHET GRUNTING]

Argh!

Ah-ha!

Lookie here.

And extra bullets.

So you killed Bradwood.

I killed everybody, Nick.

NICK: But why Feck?

CHET: He found my letters
at Bradwood's house.

So?

[SCOFFING]
So what if those letters
got in the wrong hands?

How am I
gonna look then?

Well how do you
think you look now?

Well, just tell me
one thing. Yeah.

What the hell
is "Easy grader?"

You got me, Nick.

But, hey, I did give you
a B-plus on your table leg.
Good work, son.

Later days, Nick.

[ALL SCREAMING]

About time
you showed up,
bunghole.

Oh, for Christ sake, Kyle.

This is really
not a good time. It never is.

Kyle, listen.
I'm a cop.

What? You?

[LAUGHING]

Shh.

Kyle, please be quiet.

Will you shut up?

[SCREAMING] Oh! I'm sorry.

Aren't you
Nick's father?

Yeah. That figures.

Where is he? I don't know.

Someone screamed
and he ran off that way.

What is going on here?

[FAINT MUSIC PLAYING]

Oh, Nick?

We cannot go
without major trouble! [ALL CLAMORING]

[BANGING] Shh! Shh!

Are you the
Superintendent?

Oh! No. No, I'm
a police officer.

[ALL YELLING]

Freeze.

CHET: Nick!

I can hear you
breathing, Nick.

Though not for long.

Now stop this
right now!

[SCREECHING]

[COUGHING]

[LOUD MUSIC PLAYING]

[CROWD SCREAMING]

[ALL CHEERING]

GIRL: Listen, everybody,
we found the King,
here he is,

Nick Springsteen!

[DOG BARKING]

[DOG WHINING]

[ALL SCREAMING]

GIRL: He has a gun!

[CROWD SCREAMING]

What a first week
this guy's had. Argh!

[CROWD SCREAMING]Get down!

Stay down.

No. Oh, no.
No, come on, kids. Here.

Come on.
I just wanna
shoot Springsteen.

Come on.

MAN: Chet! Give me
the gun, Chet.

Oh, come on.
Dance. Kids, dance. MAN: Chet! Chet!

[INDISTINCT YELLING]

CHET: I'm only going
to shoot Springsteen.

Don't worry about it.

[CONTINUES TALKING
INDISTINCTLY]

MAN: Chet, just give me
the gun, please.

CHET: Just tell me
where he is.
I shoot him.

And then everything
will be okay.

Jerry, you're in
my class, okay?
Where's Spring...

Tell me where
Springsteen is and
I'll give you an A. Okay?

Now, come on.

Okay. Come on, kids.
Let's dance, dance, dance!

Argh!

You saved me
a lot of messy
work there, Nick.

But Bradwood
buried the letters.

Feck didn't find
anything in the house.

So, I was wrong.

Mr. Butler... Yeah?

Chet... [EXHALING DEEPLY]

You're...

You're...Fucking nutso?

Exactly.

Huh?

[GRUNTING]

[SIRENS WAILING]

A million and two uses.

ROBIN: Nick!

All right!

[ROBIN SCREAMING]

[GASPING] ED: How about that, Nicky?

[CHUCKLING]

50 yards away
and in the dark. Hey, hold it there.

It's all right.
We're police
officers, fellas.

Everything's okay.

Just take care
of things here,
will ya?

I'll be back
to file a report.

Where you been?

Isn't the word thank you
in your vocabulary?

Thank you.

Well, yeah,
I pretty much
knew the whole time.

I mean, me,
I was helping the guy.

[GIRLS GIGGLING] Sure you were.

Hey, Carter.
How are you doing?

Good, Nick.
How are you doing?

See, me and him,
we're just like this.

I mean,
when he went
to the bathroom,

I went to
the bathroom.

Dawn-Marie,
I'm really sorry.

I'm going
to have to arrest
your step-father.

Just exactly
how old are you?

Uh-huh.

Would somebody please tell me
what the hell's going on?

Gee, it's your
case, Dave.

What are you
looking at me for?

MAN: Get in here.

Are you sure
you wouldn't be
more comfortable

on a stretcher,
Mrs. Melway?

Miss Torrence,
I need a lawyer,
not a stretcher.

Mrs. Melway. This way,
Mrs. Melway.

You saved my life.

That's right, son.
You bet your
bottom I did.

Thank you.

Thank you?
That's all I get
is thank you?

I saved his life
and I get thank you?

Dunbar, how about
a little something
with the DA?

I'll see
what I can do. Oh, thank you.

You promise? ED: Come on,
Mrs. Melway.

Right over here.
The ambulance
is over here.

So you're a cop?

Surprise, surprise.

And I just thought
you were well-read.

Yeah, well,
now that it is all
out in the open,

how about you and I
going out to dinner
some night?

Dinner?

Yeah. Tomorrow night.

My place.

We could drink
a little wine.

Mix a few metaphors.

Play with my handcuffs.

I don't think so Nick.

I mean,
how's it gonna look?

Me going out
with a former student?

I mean,
people are gonna
start to talk.

We might even
forget ourselves.

The next thing
you know we kiss

and the whole thing
gets ugly.

I'm just asking
you out to dinner,
Ms. Torrence.

Let's not kid
ourselves, Nick. Hmm?

Tell me something, Matt.

Have you ever been
King of the May?

No. Why?

Just wondering.You?

Oh, yeah.

Another week

and I'd have been
Student Body President.

[CHUCKLING] Right.

So what do you say
we go downtown
for a while?

Power a few brews.

Scope some Bettys.

I don't know, Nick.
I've got a lot of
studying to do tonight.

You? Yeah.

Actually I can't
wait to get
back to school.