Phoenix, Oregon (2019) - full transcript

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(LOW DRONE)

(THE SOUNDS OF DEEP SPACE)

(CRICKETS CHIRPING)

(BOBBY SIGHS)

(POIGNANT MUSIC)

BOBBY: Remember when
you were a little kid

and some adult told you
to enjoy being young,

because you'll
grow up really fast

and be old before you know it?

You didn't believe
them, did you?

But then one day, you
wake up in a panic



and realize they were right.

(CLOCK TICKING)

(WATER SPLASHING)

(BOBBY GROANS)

Elon Musk says we're all
living in a simulation

designed by an
advanced civilization,

some alien race out there

using our misery
for entertainment,

conspiring against us, just
to watch us struggle and fail.

(ELECTRONIC TONES CHIRPING)
(DICE RATTLING)

Are we all just a bunch
of ones and zeroes?

(MUSIC SWELLS)

(BOBBY PANTS)

(BOBBY SIGHS)



(DOG BARKING)
(CHAIN RATTLING)

Kyle, I know these guys.

They're high-end, they're local,

and it is cheaper to
buy it by the case.

It's too expensive.

I'll take three.

I'm not saving enough.

Bobby, are you okay?

Yeah.

I live not too far.

3:59, Bob, cutting it close.

Well, thank you,
I am really excited

to get you those three bottles.

I'll see you soon.

You're lookin' good today.

Love that suit.

Well, thanks.

Bigshot Bobby,
happy birthday, bro.

Don't remind me.

Dude, how come you didn't
text me back last week?

Hey, Bobby, I
wanna talk to you.

Just a little heads up,

the house is gonna be taking
50% now of our pooled tips.

You can't do that.

Just did.

You said for
the winter months.

Yeah, I know what I said.

Yeah.

Well, Kyle, it's springtime.

That's the way
it is, boys, okay.

You should be grateful
that you have a job.

I would be.

Grateful.

Great, you guys are great.

He's getting harder
and harder to ignore.

Exactly why I hit you up,
but you didn't text me back.

Hey, Carlos, Kyle said we're
using the other olive oil

for the entrees now.

What do you mean?

That's not olive oil, man.

It's a blend.

I know, but the
real stuff is gone.

CARLOS: (GROWLS) Kyle.

TELEVISION: Authentic
Italian cuisine,

right here in Phoenix.

- Hey, Tanya.
- Hey.

Back for more fun?

Right.

Let's see, Hearts
Creed over ice.

Ooh, I'll have a
thoughtful bartender.

Kyle and these goddamn
pour restrictors.

I can't even pour
a decent drink.

Such a douche.

You know he's ordering
single bottles now?

I know, I told him.

This place is doomed.

Maybe I'll join you.

(TANYA LAUGHS)

TELEVISION: Locally
owned and operated.

BOBBY: So I hope it's
not hurting your accounts.

Nah, it's all right.

I'm not gonna be
slingin' booze forever.

How long you been
dealing with him?

Five years.

TANYA: Jesus.

Yeah.

Cheers, dude.

Mm.

Oh.

TANYA: Like candy.

It is so good.

You know, I use
this for grilling.

Put it on cauliflower.

Little red onion,
little salt and pepper.

And then I make this really
amazing Cajun cream sauce.

It's so yummy.

Mm, that sounds ridiculous.

It is ridiculous.

Well, I don't really
cook like I used to.

My place isn't
really set up for it.

No?

- No, it's...
- Well, you have place, so.

I do, but it's small.

Yeah, my place
is pretty small.

I mean, it's a three-bedroom.

It's on a beautiful
piece of property, but.

You're on a gorgeous
piece of property.

I was there for your
birthday last November.

That's right, you were there.

It was a very nice night.

MARIO: Hey, hey.

- Hey.
- Hey.

Hi.

Oh, Mario, Bobby.

- My man.
- Hey.

Pleasure.

Look at that 'stache.

That is a good 'stache.

Isn't that great?

- Here you go.
- Oh, no, no.

Tanya and I are old friends.

It's all right,
keep it anyway.

And bring us a really
nice rose, Bobby.

Will do, coming right up.

Shall we?

TANYA: I like it.

(TELEVISION DRONING SOFTLY)

TELEVISION: Right
here in Phoenix.

(LIGHT UPBEAT MUSIC)

Thank you.

Now, see, I like
this guy, Bobby.

Most people in this world,
they're all smoke, no fire.

But not this guy.

I can see it.

I can feel your heat, my man.

You're burning me up.

Or is that Tanya?

Yeah, that's you.

Doesn't she look resplendent?

Like a goddamn sunrise.

- Thank you.
- You keep that up,

I'm gonna have to
put these on in here.

(TANYA LAUGHS)
(CELLPHONE BUZZES)

Investor.

It's all good news, baby.

Si, soy Mario.

Where'd you find him?

He's a venture capitalist.

So you're mixing
business with pleasure?

Very tricky, like
vodka and Red Bull.

That's disgusting, and no.

I mean, you know, maybe.

But I don't know.

It's not, I mean, I could.

- I'd have to...
- You're just makin' up

- as you go along.
- Just gonna figure it out.

Forgive me.

How's Bobby's rose?

It's so good.

It's dry, it's fruit-forward.

It's got citrus notes.

It's not too sweet.

All right, let's see.

Mm.

Yeah, strawberry,
notes of citrus.

I mean, you have a
beautiful palate, Tanya.

Can I get you started
on any appetizers?

You give us a minute, please?

(LIVELY MUSIC)

Hey!
(CROWD APPLAUDING)

BLADE: Later, Bobby.

(BOBBY SIGHS)

(BOLD MISCHIEVOUS MUSIC)

BOBBY: My life really
does feel like a farce

written by aliens.

Like these fish.

A waitress I went out
with a couple of times

was moving away, and she
asked me to adopt them.

I told her I'd think about it.

And then the next
thing you know,

she brings 'em over
and sets up the tank.

(FAN RATTLING)

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

(FAN RUMBLING)

(MESSAGE WHOOSHING)

What you doin', man?

BOBBY: Hi, man.

You ready for this?

Dark roast, extra cream and
sugar, the way you like it.

Thanks, man.

So what's been going on, bro.

How's the comic book going?

It's a graphic novel.

Is it done?

It's languishing unfinished.

Oh, man.

I thought when you moved into
your sweet mama's trailer

you said you'd be able to focus.

Thought by now
you'd makin' bank,

signing autographs
at the Comic-Con,

royalties from alien figurines.

Hey, Bobby, I'm sorry.

This is good.

This is exactly what
I'm trying to get to.

You don't have time
to write or draw

because you're wasting your
nights workin' your ass off

at Kyle's terrible restaurant.

But here's the thing, man.

It wouldn't matter if I
had a different situation,

'cause everything's
predetermined.

No, no, no.

Don't you be blaming
the aliens again, bro.

My mom used to say (SPEAKS
IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE).

Everyone creates
their own destiny.

Do me a favor, Bobby.

Close your eyes for a minute.

Come on, just do it.

Close your eyes.

Good.

Now, deep breath.
(EXHALES DEEPLY)

And I want you to
go deep, way down.

You feel that?

Your passion is
still there, Bobby.

I can feel it squirming
beneath all those failures,

all those regrets.

This is supposed
to help me, right?

Yeah.

Come on, close your eyes.

Do it.
(BOBBY GROANS)

Okay.

I want you to visualize
what you'll be doing

10 years from now.

Can you see it?

Not working for Kyle at least.

No.

What would your
mama want for you?

You were her beneficiary.

She left you that crib,
that beautiful Airstream,

and she left you a nice
little chunk of change.

Oh, is that what
this is about?

Yeah, I mean, what would
your mom want you to do

with those 50 Gs that
you're just sitting on?

I mean, it was supposed
to be for Nikki and mean,

and then for my mom's
hypothetical grandchildren.

No, fuck that, bro.

Nikki's gone, life goes on.

That's your nest egg now.

Mom wanted you to be happy.

I thought about livin'
off that money, you know,

rollin' along with it.

But I can't just burn
through all that cash

and have nothing to show for it.

I can respect that.

But think about this.

Why not use that cash to
create a new life for yourself?

I mean, that's what I'm doing.

I've been saving my money.

(ASSERTIVE MUSIC)

Woo.

Yeah.

Look at this.

Are you serious?

You kidding me?

It's like the castle
of our dreams.

Can you see it?

Neon bowling ball,
neon pins falling down.

What do you think?

I think you've lost your mind.

No, you're not
visualizing it, Bobby.

What do you remember
about this place?

Bowling.

Okay, yeah, what else?

Come on, man, close your eyes.

You're not visualizing.

Just do it.

Okay, what do you remember?

Birthday parties.

Good, yes, bein' a kid.

Running free, eating cake.

Playing "Donkey Kong"
with your stupid buddies.

What else do you remember?

(WISTFUL MUSIC)

Drivin' around with Nikki in
her mom's yellow '87 Camaro.

I don't know.

CARLOS: Come on,
close your eyes.

I'm not closin'
my eyes anymore.

I feel like an idiot.

Okay, all right, all right.

We'll see how this
makes you feel.

Huh?

Bowling 300 in your senior
year, you remember that?

Before it was Bigshot
Bobby, he was 300 Hoffy.

Shit, I had just moved here.

I couldn't even speak English.

But my best friend is the
high school bowling champ.

Kind of raised my stock.

Come on, I'll show you
what really gets me goin'.

And no more about
Nikki, bro, okay.

This is now.

Oh, wow.

Yeah.

Now I see what
you're talking about.

It's beautiful.

All right, just hear me out.

No, this is perfect.

It could be.

You see, Bobby, by
keeping this place closed,

we're depriving all
the children of Phoenix

of all those sweet
memories you were talkin'.

Wouldn't wanna deprive
'em of this place.

You fix up the bar here.

Your choices, anything you like.

Oregon craft beer, Oregon wines.

You're a tastemaker, Bobby.

You always have been.

Keep your mind open.

I'm gonna show you
my sanctum sanctorum

and exactly why this
enterprise is gonna work.

Check this out.

This is it, baby.

This is where the
magic happens, huh.

Beautiful or what?

Don't worry, everything in here

will be cleaned and restored.

BOBBY: Greasy chicken strips.

French fries, milkshakes.

Ranch dressing, mm.

You know me better than that.

Okay, check this out.

Napoletano pizza pies

that compete with the
best in the world,

all the dough made fresh
daily with these hands.

(WATER DRIPPING)

I think it's a dump.

(DOOR SLAMS)

Oh, that's it, you could roll.

I remember.

It's a completely
useless talent.

Yeah, well, that useless
talent is gonna save this place

from becoming a Dollar Store.

Look at this.

Rising Phoenix.

Come for the pizza,
stay for the bowling.

Or come for the bowling,
stay for the pizzas.

Oh, but you haven't
tasted my pies.

But you will, bro.

You'll see.

Oh!

See, that's a sign.

Your aliens made you
throw that strike.

How come you didn't tell
me about this place earlier?

I didn't wanna
jinx it, you know.

I'm saving my cash.

Come on, I wanna show
you somethin' else.

(DOOR RATTLES)

BOBBY: Play room.

CARLOS: It's your office.

Where's your office?

Kitchen's my office.

But this is yours.

Come on, eat and bowl for free.

You need a day off, take one,
because you'd be an owner.

Man, think about it.

Well, I have to admit, it
actually sounds kind of amazing.

But then I think,

this has gotta be the stupidest
fuckin' idea you ever had.

All right.

Well, you know what should
really freak you out?

Getting old.

Not going after your dreams
when you had a chance.

Watching your life slip
away, and then you die.

Oof.

Okay, well, let's
keep it positive.

Imagine being an owner,

drawing your comics
whenever you want.

No more Kyle, bro.

No more bow ties.

(ASSERTIVE MUSIC)

(SCOFFS) Damn it.

CARLOS: Hey,
so tomorrow night,

I got my first
investor meeting, man.

You coming?

(GROANS) I don't know, Carlos.

I mean, I'd really
like nothing more

than the say fuck you to Kyle.

Yes.

Hey.

Hey, Bobby.

Hey.

Do you have something
you wanna say to me?

No.

No?

Nope.

Oh, I thought you...

I was just talking to
Carlos about your new oil.

The new oil?

New oil, well, what
about it, Carlos?

We can't use it anymore.

It's a compromise
I'm not okay with.

But we're already using it.

But Kyle...

But Kyle. (WHINES)

It affects the taste, man.

It affects the
taste. (GRUMBLES)

Look, an oil blend
might save money...

Oh, it saves money.

But it's like pouring
hot water in your latte.

I think you're
totally overreacting.

Blade made me today's special
with the new olive oil.

It was delicious.

It's not an olive oil.

Quit calling it that.

It's a blend that fucks
with the taste, all right!

(CHUCKLES) I love
when Carlos gets mad.

His eyes pop out
like my pet iguana.

Goddamn it, Bobby,
where's your bow tie?

I guess I forgot it.

Oh, I forgot it, Kyle.

Yeah, sorry, Kyle.

All right.

Okay.

You stay right there.

(DOOR CREAKS)

It's your lucky day.

Here you go.

You're gonna pay for this.

15 bucks comes outta
the top of your tips.

Seems a little high.

It's almost cost.

What do you say?

Thank you, Kyle.

Thank you, Kyle.

Thank you, Kyle.

Thank you, Kyle.

There it is.

That was nice.

Okay.

You're welcome.

Man, I almost threw
my apron in his face

and bailed tonight, bro.

18 bucks on a Saturday night.

Disgrace.

It's time, my friend.

Look, I know
tomorrow's our day off,

but why don't you just drop by.

Come check it out.

I mean, we're goin' up
to my nephew Rudy's place

up at the lake.

He's got this great kitchen.

We'll talk some business, eat
some pies, drink some wine.

Come on.

I'll be there.

That's it, baby.

Okay, I'll text you the address.

Seven o'clock, don't forget.

Woo!

(UPBEAT MUSIC)

BOBBY: I met Nikki
at Christmas mass.

I saw her at the top
of the cathedral steps.

I went to public high school,
and she was a St. Mary's girl.

Things moved fast.

♪ You're like a
color, you know ♪

♪ Yeah, one that
makes you glad ♪

♪ Some fantastic color rainbow ♪

♪ Some splendid fun we had ♪

♪ I've seen an angel ♪

♪ Watched you ♪

(SINGING OBSCURED BY MUSIC)

♪ Her halo in her hand ♪

♪ I watched her fly down ♪

♪ Watched you turn
your color on ♪

♪ But I didn't wanna stare ♪

(FAN RUMBLING)
(CLOCK TICKING)

(BOBBY GROANS)

(WATER SPLASHING)

(LIGHTHEARTED MUSIC)

The dough is most
critical, right.

100-year yeast starter,
double fermentation.

Carlos, I thought we were
gonna talk a little business.

We are, Bobby.

That's exactly what we're doing.

Now, my tomato sauce is
slow-cooked and full-bodied.

It comes from the meaty
and juicy heirloom tomatoes

grown in San Marzano,

ripening in the rich volcanic
soil of Mount Vesuvius.

Oh, I love that deep red color.

Look at that.

Yes.

Rich.

A great tomato sauce has zest.

I love that word
because it means energy.

Fresh crushed
peppers and garlic,

Sicilian oregano,
cracked peppercorn,

and just enough sea salt
to lock in the taste

so it stays zesty and delicious.

Fresh roasted garlic,
Parmigiano-Reggiano.

House-cured pancetta.

Now this goes into a hot oven.

Wild arugula.

I call this this one the
Elisa, after my mother.

Because it's a thing
of great beauty.

En paz descansa.

Mm.

Get out your dictionary.

Look up holy fuck.

Oh, man.

(LIVELY MUSIC)
(CROWD CHATTERING)

(SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)

So are Rudy and Marie investing?

No, but I think
they could advise us.

They've done really well
with their two taquerias,

and they're thinking of
opening a third location.

So I think they'd
be down to help us.

Thought about askin' my
dad to be a third investor,

but nah, I don't
wanna risk his money.

I mean, he's but picking on
the farms for over 40 years.

Plus, you know, I
don't want anybody

lookin' over my shoulder
second-guessing.

I wanna be left
alone with the menu.

So who's the third investor?

Mario Bentley Jr.

He's this new venture
capitalist in town.

Hmm.

That guy, yeah, he's
the guy that was dancin'

with Tanya the
other night, right?

Yeah, did you meet him?

Yeah, I met him.

CARLOS: What?

He's kind of a
one-percenter, isn't he?

He's been really successful.

Carlos, I don't want
another Kyle tellin' me

I gotta wear a bow tie.

Mario's hands-off, bro.

He's not like that.

He's a great guy.

The only reason
he's even in town

is for this cannabis thing.

He's usually flyin' around
the world somewhere.

So I think he's goin' to Dubai.

He's gonna be gone
for a few months.

Why isn't he here now?

Because I didn't invite him.

Because this is about
you and me, Bobby.

That's it.

Look, I'm in.

I already signed the lease.

I didn't wanna take a chance
on losing the property,

so once Mario said he was in,

I just went ahead and
secured it myself.

What if I don't invest?

Well, then I have
to find a new partner.

But that's not something
that I can control.

This place, it's
my destiny, Bobby.

I know it is.

I'm excited about
this angel investor,

but you're the guy
that I've always wanted

to be my everyday
business partner.

I wasn't convinced,

until I tasted those
pies of yours, man.

I'm in.

Serious?

(GASPS) Oh, my brother.

That's what I'm talkin' about.

Ooh!

You remember that touchdown
celebration dance, dude,

when you got the
300, and yeah, baby.

Yeah!

♪ Sometimes I hate myself ♪

♪ For puttin' stock
in stupid stuff ♪

♪ I can't escape my head ♪

♪ She's so cool
but I'm an idiot ♪

♪ She'll just slip away ♪

♪ You're as alone as yesterday ♪

♪ You woke up by yourself ♪

♪ Called your mom and brushed
your teeth real well ♪

♪ But I think you lost again ♪

BOBBY: Mario Bentley Jr.

♪ You lost again ♪

♪ You lost your head ♪

♪ Your name's not Ned ♪

♪ But who knows, you've
got weird friends ♪

♪ You picked a coma ♪

♪ Over your comrades ♪
(BOBBY SIGHS)

- ♪ A vegetable at last ♪
- It's gonna be good.

TELEVISION: With
red wine and rosemary.

Finished with roasted garlic.

You think I wouldn't notice

an expensive bottle going empty?

How stupid do you think I am?

Well, I think
you're pretty stupid.

You're fired!

You can't fire me.

I quit!

You can't quit
after being fired.

That doesn't make any sense.

You're stupid.

I'm stupid?

Hey!

Bobby, Bobby, be cool.

He ain't worth it.

If you even touched, I
mean, brushed against my coat,

I would have you up
on assault charges.

You know what, Carlos,
you're also fired.

My resignation's
already on your desk.

Yeah, but I didn't see it.

So technically, I fired
you before you quit.

Whatever, as long as I don't
have to cook here anymore.

Blade, good timing.

You are the new
interim head chef.

Wait, what's going on?

These two geniuses
are opening up

a pizza parlor/bowling alley.

What else are you gonna
be selling, live bait?

Lotto tickets?

You gonna put in a gas pump?

Maybe some video poker machines?

That's classy.

Come with us, I'll show you
how to cook some real food.

I don't know, Carlos.

Being the head chef is a
pretty good opportunity

for me, man.

Damn right, it is.

CARLOS: Come on,
Bobby, let's go.

Hey.

Let me give you a warning.

This is a fucking hard business.

You can't trust anybody.

I learned that.

That was smart.

(GRITTY UPBEAT MUSIC)

Hey!

Hey, oh, there she
is, the deal-maker.

Oh, my god, you're in?

- Really?
- Yeah, I'm done with Kyle.

I'm done with Kyle.

Congratulations.

Yeah, it's kind of amazing

how this is all coming together.

Yeah.

Are you goin' over there?

- Yeah.
- Of course.

Yeah.

So how much cash
does Mario have?

Oh, he's swimming in cash.

This pot deal is
serious, trust me.

Right.

So are you goin' out with him?

No. Why?

Well, I mean, I just
thought, you know,

since we're gonna be partners,

I just thought I should know.

Well, I dig him, but
I mean, it's nothing.

I mean, he's a player.

But that's what makes
him kind of fun, so.

Sure.

(LAUGHS) Are you jealous?

No, no.

Yeah, totally, actually.

He's a pretty intimidating guy.

Maybe I should learn
how to salsa dance, or.

Yeah, well, maybe you should.

You should probably get a
few new moves in there now.

(BOTH LAUGH)

Bowling alley owner.

BOBBY: Yeah.

All right.

(MARIO SPEAKING IN JAPANESE)

- Hey.
- Hey.

(MARIO SPEAKING IN JAPANESE)

Woo, that's what I'm
talkin' about, baby.

Makin' money just makes me want

- to move my body.
- (LAUGHS) Oh.

- Yeah.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And ya brought the boys.

Carlos, my man, how are you?

- Bobby.
- Good to see you, sir.

Yeah.

Guys, I'm sure you're wonderin',

thank you very much,

what the hell I'm doin'
in Southern Oregon.

I came here to get
my hands around

that billion dollar
weed industry, right.

And now that that's done,
our little venture here,

it's mostly for fun.

But I gotta say, man, we
are diggin' your concept.

Great, 'cause
we, the concept is,

you know, we, that...

Beer and bowling
go hand in hand.

Alcohol by itself,
now that's a business.

But you throw in
these delicious pies

and the fact that
Carlos's world-class dough

only costs pennies
to make, come on.

This is not steak and seafood,
right, this is mom and pop.

The markup on a pizza,
baby, that's where it's at.

Oh, you know,

- I love your enthusiasm, sir.
- Oh, yeah.

And thank you, Mario, for
your willingness to back us.

Up until this point,

I've been finding this
thing willy-nilly,

as you like to say.

But now we have
official paperwork.

Speaking of.

- All right, gentlemen.
- Here it is.

Here we go.

(TRIUMPHANT MUSIC)

(GROUP CHEERING)

Congratulations.

MARIO: All right, cheers.

Congratulations, guys.

CARLOS: Woo!

To Mario, thank you.

You got this, Hoffy.

Where's Mario?

Oh, he's on with Tokyo again.

But he's wiring
his money anyway.

Thank you, sir.

Here's my balance.

Money already spent
in QuickBooks.

(UPBEAT MUSIC)

♪ I was only feelin' like
I kind of wanted to ♪

♪ But I didn't wait up in sky ♪

♪ I waited for my friends ♪

♪ Watchin', just don't
believe with my eyes ♪

♪ Open them again ♪

♪ And I was only feelin' right ♪

♪ If they could see 'em again ♪

♪ But I didn't hide ♪

♪ I didn't hide ♪

(CARLOS SPEAKING FAINTLY)

Hey, guys.

♪ Wouldn't hide ♪

♪ Holdin' time ♪

Dream team's here!

We got this.

♪ And I ♪

♪ Wouldn't feel my sigh ♪

♪ Wouldn't hide ♪

♪ Holdin' time all the while ♪

♪ Wouldn't hide ♪

(MACHINES WHINING)
(PINS CLUNKING)

Is it fixable?

Classic Brunswick A2
pinsetter made back in the '60s.

Good machine.

Just needs a little TLC.

Well, that's great news.

So Carlos and I were wondering,

since they're probably all
gonna need a little work,

could you give us a
break on the price?

Nah.

Well, can you
give us an estimate?

Not really.

I mean, who knows
what I'll run into.

Could you just
give us a ballpark?

With these old pinsetters

and all the lane work
this place needs,

10 grand, minimum.

10 grand?

Well, we don't have to
do everything at once.

Nah, we don't
need smooth lanes

or machines that
actually reset the pins

or return the fuckin' balls.

Nah, don't need 'em. (CHUCKLES)

Bowlers can just, like,
retrieve their own balls

after each roll.

(LAUGHS) Motherfuckin' shit.

I know it's a
lot of money, but...

It's not in the budget, man.

Well, here's the thing.

The lanes...

I'm talkin' about the lanes.

They left fine to me.

Well, they're not fine.

It's not even a question.

They have to be repaired,
cleaned, and reconditioned.

What if it's like every
lane has its own character,

you know, like a
different challenge.

Carlos, this isn't golf.

Come on, man, this is
bowling, great American sport.

It's available and
affordable to the 99%.

(SIGHS) You're
right, man, I'm sorry.

- I'm freakin' out.
- No worries.

I just want it to
be great, you know.

It is gonna be great.

I want it to be great, too.

You know what, go
back to the kitchen.

I'll...

- Let me woo him.
- All right, thanks.

- All right.
- Thanks, man.

Hey, you're Hoffy.

I saw your cute little
display on the wall.

Oh.

Yeah.

I got 300 scores before,

but nobody ever put my
pictures in the papers.

Well, I was just a
kid at the time, so.

When's the last time
you got a perfect score?

That was the last time,
that one magic Saturday.

Just a lucky day, huh?

Whoop-de-do.

Whoop-de-do, de-do.

It wasn't a lucky day, Al.

I was good.

When I was a teenager,
I averaged over 200.

Yeah, and what happened?

You grew up and
you got all mental,

couldn't bowl for shit anymore?

No, I got interested
in other things, okay.

I started drawing comics.

I went to art school.

(LAUGHS) Uh-huh.

Since you're such
a hotshot bowler, Al,

you should enter our
grand opening tournament

and share your gift.

You gonna put my
picture on the wall

after I bury your ass?

You know, I'm just tryin'
to make friendly conversation.

Yeah, yeah, right,
friendly conversation.

You're tryin' to get a discount.

Al, if you
continue to be rude,

I might have to
get somebody else.

I am the boss.

If you're gonna be
this rude, I'll walk.

And then you'll have
to get someone else

to do what I can do.

And good luck doin' that.

In this county,
I'm the only guy.

(WINDOW SLAMS)

(BOLD UPBEAT MUSIC)

Still want me around,
Bigshot Bobby?

Yeah, I do, Al.

AL: That's what
I thought. (LAUGHS)

CARLOS: So you
wanna just reach in.

And then you punch.

You drizzle it in the
side, and you rub the in.

Yes.

I'm gonna have to practice
if I'm gonna beat that clown.

I'll bowl with you.

You will?

That's great, you bowl?

Uh...

No. (LAUGHS)

Even better.

This is a fresh hop from Eugene.

Okay.

Mm.

That's really nice.

- Yeah.
- No Budweiser?

No way, not here.

Wait 'til you taste these pies.

They should pair
'em with Opus One.

Well, you're gonna
price out your clientele.

That's why I need a big-value
cab that's not obnoxious.

I have a local cab
that will blow your mind.

And it is 120 a case.

(DOOR SLAMS)

Uh-oh.

Bigshot Bob, this place
is worse off than I thought.

So I'm gonna be bringin'
on my assistant Joe.

Is that necessary?

You want your
lanes respectable

for your historic grand
opening tournament?

Yeah, but...

Okay then.

You know, Al,

I'd like to express a
little gratitude right now

for giving me the opportunity
to light up your ass

during this tournament.

I'm gonna really
enjoy destroying you.

Oh, shit.

Whoa.

So. (SIGHS)

So that's how it's gonna be?

You haven't even
seen me roll, Hoffy.

You haven't seen the
action on my ball.

First-class Boomer.

Nothin' but clean
games on my cards.

I'm gonna fry your ass.

I'm gonna send you
back to art school.

(QUIRKY TENSE MUSIC)

(AL LAUGHS)

I like him.

(BLADE SIGHS)

(LIGHTHEARTED MUSIC)

CARLOS: This is
the buffalo pesto.

Please, please, try it.

All right.

- Tanya, Blade.
- Thank you, sir.

CARLOS: That's
the spicy Calabrese.

Oh!

CARLOS: Bon appetit.

Mm.

CARLOS: Blade,
por favor, take one.

Oh, my god.

What did I tell you?

TANYA: Yeah.

It's amazing.

Mm.
(CELLPHONE BUZZING)

- Mm.
- So good.

- Huh?
- Oh.

That's your dough.

Hey, Mario, sorry, I'm eating.

Okay.

MARIO: All right,
we got Bobby, Carlos?

BOBBY: Hey.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And also Blade,
our new prep cook.

MARIO: Hey, Blade, welcome.

Yeah.

MARIO: Guys, listen,
I gotta tell you.

Dubai, geez, this
place is beautiful.

That's what money does.

It simply empowers people

to put absolutely beautiful
things out into the world,

like your pies, Carlos.

Yeah, we're taste-testing
them right now, as we speak.

MARIO: Oh, you tease.

BOBBY: So delicious.

MARIO: All right, guys,
a little business here.

All right.

Grand opening, that's
fast approaching.

How's everything looking?

Amazing.

I'm loving coming in
here at the crack of dawn

just gettin' busy
in the kitchen.

MARIO: All right,
crack of dawn, wonderful.

(CARLOS AND TANYA CHUCKLE)

Bobby?

It's goin' very good.

Very good.

(TANYA LAUGHS)

We're coming out with
organic pilsners, local.

We're branching out into, like,

some soft drinks
for the children.

MARIO: Oh, there we go.

That's what I'm talkin' about.

Are you comin' to
the grad opening?

MARIO: Oh, come on.

What are you, crazy?

Jenny's already booked
the flights, man.

And Hoffy, you're gonna bowl

another 300 game my man

I can feel it.

I'll be jet-lagged, but I
will be in time for some pies.

Look, much love,
guys, I gotta run.

See you all soon.

Take care.

Bye-bye.

Woo-woo, woo-woo, woo.

(PLAYFUL MUSIC)

BOBBY: Can't stop
thinkin' about my mom.

She never had a real
wedding or a honeymoon.

Our wedding and
reception was perfect.

What can I say?

The aliens wrote a great script.

(UPBEAT MUSIC)

Is it normal for a man
to think about his mom

on his honeymoon?

Don't misunderstand.

Nikki and I were
having a terrific time.

After the luau, I was told
my mom's boyfriend called.

I knew something happened,

because this clown
would never call me.

(POIGNANT MUSIC)

Four days into our honeymoon,
we were on our way back home.

Margie.

Mother.

Mom.

Mama.

Mommy.

(HAND KNOCKING)

Knock, knock.

Hey.

Hey, are we all buttoned
up on the first order

so I can take it?

Yeah, just like it is.

Thanks, appreciate it.

What you got there?

Oh, just doodling, takin'
advantage of my office.

Doodling?

So self-indulgent.

TANYA: Is that you?

Yeah.

Apparently my storied
life deserves a book.

- Can I?
- Oh, yeah, yeah.

You can touch it.

Wow.

These are amazing.

These are really
fucking amazing.

It must be so cathartic.

I submitted 'em to Curly
Mullet Comics in Portland.

I haven't heard back yet.

It's a long shot.

Well, maybe they
didn't get to it yet.

Did you submit anywhere else?

Why not?

You're in here after hours.

I'm you got a lot of stuff here.

Well, that doesn't mean
it deserves to be published.

Oh.

I see.

You have your wires crossed.

It's just a work in progress.

I don't even have an ending yet.

I mean, you love doing this,

so just stop complaining
about it and finish it.

You have no idea what
I've been going through

tryin' to finish this.

But that's why you
need to finish it.

Because people need to see this.

Otherwise, it's not a book.

It doesn't count.

I don't mean to be harsh.

It just seems like
you're in a funk.

Is that your ex?

BOBBY: Yeah.

TANYA: She is so gorgeous.

She's hot, she's like,
and not like fake hot.

She's like French cafe,
sort of nostalgic.

Hey, do you wanna
go outside for just,

out to the bar.

Okay.

Anyway, the plot sort of
turns on Nikki and my mother.

But it's really all about
me, a memoir of sorts.

I'm trying to be very realistic.

And it is, except for the aliens

that control the
simulation that I live in.

And I know that sounds weird.

Of course it does.

It's so obvious, yeah.

(LAUGHS) Oh, thank you.

Yeah, you're welcome.

So why did you get divorced.

Well,

we were in Oahu.

I, well, we were on
our second honeymoon.

And my husband went off

with his high school
girlfriend. (LAUGHS)

- Oh, my god.
- Yeah.

You're kidding me?

No, they'd been emailing,
and they just decided

to go through with it.
(BOBBY GASPS)

So.

That's brutal.

It was.

Yeah, it was brutal.

But I'm good, you know.

I have fully adjusted
to being on my own.

I've got no kids.

I've got no attachments.

And you know,

I literally never have
to speak his name again.

What's his name?

Not saying.

You're very quick.

(BOTH LAUGH)

You're good, you're good.

Well, I've never been happier.

So it's all good.

You're wearing it well.

Hey, Al.

I'm takin' off.

If you don't mind,

could you turn off the
lights and close up?

Actually, Joe
and I were thinkin'

of leavin' all the
fuckin' lights on, Hoffy,

and leavin' all the
doors wide open.

Is that all right?

(JOE LAUGHS)

(AL IMITATES PIN CRASHING)

(GENTLE MUSIC)

(BOBBY SIGHS)

Do you need a cab?

(BOBBY CHUCKLES)

- Yeah, sure.
- Okay.

Thanks.

TANYA: Yeah.

I feel like I'm 14 again,

drawing comics and
needing a ride home.

Well, it's not
all bad being 14.

I like the way you
devoured that pizza today.

Jesus Christ. (SLURPS)

I don't know know
how that happens.

Where does it go? (LAUGHS)

BOBBY: It's the silver
Airstream on the right,

just past this building.

Okay.

Wow.

You were not kiddin'
when you said small.

I used to live in
this big, old house

on a 100-acre farm.

And when the trim
season would come,

all these vagabonds would
just take over the place.

And there was a bungalows
on the property.

It was really fun
for about a month.

(TANYA LAUGHS)

Yeah.

So I took advantage
of my mom's Airstream,

simplified, downsized.

Yeah, I don't save anything.

Since I've been on my own,

it's like any junk that I have

that I have a negative
attachment to it,

send it to Goodwill, or
recycle it, or I don't know,

throw it in a dumpster
and never look back.

Feels good.

You're so...

Well, you're a lot of things.

Thanks for the ride.

(DOOR THUDS)

After the funeral, mom's
aneurysm had me scared.

So I took a kickboxing
class to get into shape.

It helped vent my anger.

My work improved.

Even work was fun again.

It was the best
I'd felt in months.

I was confident.

And it sparked our marriage.

But then the kicker, I
couldn't get Nikki pregnant.

It was my genes, after all.

And so my bloodline would
stop with me, an only child.

(MACHINE BEEPING FAINTLY)

It wasn't even
really a discussion.

It was over.

She wanted her own kids

and a life I couldn't give her.

Nikki sold the wedding rings,
and I kept our shitty Taurus.

(LOW TONES WARBLING)

BLADE: Okay.

Should I (SPEAKS FAINTLY)?

BLADE: Looks good.

No, a little bit
up on your side.

- There we go.
- Yeah, it's good.

Perfect.

(ENERGETIC MUSIC)

(MOANS) Eso.

You know what happens if
we do this right, Blade?

It's so important.

Huh?

Close your eyes.

Do it, keep workin' the
dough, but close your eyes.

Now imagine the most
wonderful crust in the world.

(BLADE CHUCKLES)
Yeah.

We wanna develop the
stands of gluten.

Light and airy with
just the right chew.

Crisp with a beautiful char.

BLADE: Yeah.

- You see it?
- Yeah.

Okay, now put that
love in the dough.

Good, put it in the punch.

Beautiful. Pero con amor.

That's it, now own it, brother!

Do it, Blade!

That's it, send that
beautiful ball back to daddy.

That's what I'm talkin' about.

Now give us a fresh 10.

Good machine.

All right, Joe, little
somethin' goofy goin' on

with pinsetter in lane three.

It sounds a little fucked up.

Figure her out, and then
our work's done here.

Yeh, sounds like the cycle
solenoid's outta whack, easy fix.

So like I was saying,

foodies have gotten
so sophisticated,

there's very little
margin for error.

But with all the great
pizzerias in the world,

why shouldn't the best one
in the Northwest be here

in Phoenix, Oregon.

Because it's on Portland.

There are some great
pies in Portland,

but nothing like this.

Try it.

Write about that
in your article.

Al, Joe, the lanes look great.

Thank you.

You said it was
gonna be $10,000.

This is twice that.

(AL LAUGHS)

What the fuck, Al?

We've replaced nine
sections of lane.

I worked on this job for
93 hours, and I stink.

Joe and me restored your lanes.

We repaired and oiled all 24.

We fixed 11 pinsetters
with new parts.

Well, thanks for
clarifying that.

I want a goddamn
cashier's check.

All right, relax, Al.

You'll have your check.

You better, or you won't open.

I got a lot of
bowlers comin' in here

for your little
tournament, Hoffy.

So don't fuck with me.

(TENSE QUIRKY MUSIC)

(SPEAKING DROWNED OUT BY MUSIC)

It's really expensive.

- Well, here...
- Ooh.

- Is a little pick-me-up...
- Wow.

After that debacle.

Root beer floats for the kids.

All locally made, vanilla
organic gelato and...

Oh, my god.

Caldera root beer.

- Mm.
- Okay, Bobby.

- Delectable, brother.
- Holy smokes.

- These are seriously ridic.
- Mm.

You like?

- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.

- Mm.
- Wow.

I have to bring this up.

Now that Al doubled the
price on his repairs,

Mario's deposit hasn't
hit the account yet, so.

Really, why not?

What's goin' on, Tanya?

Don't worry.

He has to, you know,

he's just busy
getting liquid for,

to match this deposit
he has to make

on the Phoenix Farm deal.

He has to do a
million dollars cash.

That's why he's been in
Dubai and Tokyo, and.

Yeah, of course.

And we've got enough
money to cover us.

- Yeah.
- So we're all right.

Trust me, $50,000 is
nothing to this guy.

I've seen how hard he works.

- Absolutely.
- And plus,

this is your destiny.

Absolutely!
(GLASSES CLINKING)

TANYA: You're livin' it.

BOBBY: How many
bowlers do we have, Marie?

We have 16 so far.

We are golden.

All right.

Your wine, sir.

Oh, perfect timing.

Yeah, you sign for that.

Yeah.

Wow, that's really fillin' up.

You guys did a good job.

Couldn't have
done it without Al,

as much as I hate to admit it.

All right.

I need to deal with
my other accounts.

Are you all good?

- Yeah.
- Good.

Thanks again for all your help

- way above the call of duty.
- Yeah.

Oh, there was one thing
I wanted to ask you.

TANYA: You?

Do you still
wanna bowl with me?

Is that what the kids
are calling it these days?

Yeah.

(LAUGHS) Yeah,
I would love to.

I can't tonight, though, I got
a conference call with Mario.

But I can tomorrow.

Okay.

Okay.

BOBBY: I'll just be
staring at the clock.

Well, don't be
starin' at my butt.

BOBBY: Too late.

(TANYA LAUGHS)

(GENTLE SENTIMENTAL MUSIC)

First-batch pancetta, man.

What do you think?

Mm, it's good, man.

- Yeah?
- Very good.

Excellent.

BLADE: Mm.

Hey, Carlos, should we
make this Calabrese 20 bucks?

CARLOS: No, I
wanna keep it simple.

So Tio, what if someone
wants just a pepperoni?

No.

We've only got
four choices, okay.

And all the ingredients
are important.

The whole is greater
than the sum of the parts.

RUDY: What if somebody wants
a Calabrese, but not spicy?

Look, if you don't like it
hot, there's three other pies.

I like it hot.

It's so good, Rudy.

I haven't tried it yet, man.

Well, you should try it.

Have it for lunch.

Carlos has got it
totally dialed.

Thank you.

So people are paying 18
bucks for a small pizza?

(SCOFFS) Rudy, 12 inches
is the perfect size, man.

Bigger or smaller
compromises the crust.

It's not small.

It's perfect for two.

I just think some
people might want a large.

That's all I'm saying.

(SCOFFS) You're
not listening to me.

There's only one size, okay.

If they want more,
they can order more.

Tio, don't take it wrong.

I just know that
families around here

are lookin' for a
deal, that's all.

You know what, they don't
have to go all the way

to New York for a great pie.

That's the deal.

If you wanna save money,

then go get a coupon from
a pinche pizza chain.

Get a cheap, extra
large, extra doughy,

tasteless pizza crust
topped with bland sauce

and processed ingredients,

loaded with partially hydrogenated
oils, and maybe even MSG.

It makes me sick just
thinking about it.

(NOTEPAD THUDS)

(FOOTSTEPS SHUFFLING)

(DOOR SLAMS)

Look at it this way, Rudy.

We're saving 'em on airfare.

That's a $600
savings right there.

(SIGHS) So Nephew, I'm so
sorry for what happened earlier.

- Nah.
- You know, I'm just...

You were right, it was my bad.

But I just...

It's just that I,

you know, this menu's
really particular to me.

(CARLOS SPEAKS FAINTLY)

Sorry.

I know, Tio.

- Woo!
- That's it, Hoffman!

My Hoffy, baby!

Listen up, guys.

Mario's big-time check
has been deposited.

The Phoenix Farms deal is
closed and fully funded.

And that means you are funded.

Oh!

That's right.

Thank you, Tanya.

Yeah.

Boyyy!

Oh, nice. (LAUGHS)

- Roll a strike.
- Okay.

And the aliens come through.

Woo!

(UPBEAT ENERGETIC MUSIC)

(TANYA CHEERS)

BOBBY: Yeah.

I was into golf.

It's your sport.

CARLOS: Don't play with me.

(ONLOOKERS CHEERING)

Yeah, I think that's on fire.

RUDY: Yes, it was.

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Woo-hoo ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

Yes.

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ Woo-hoo ♪

Oh, yeah.

I see a lot of potential.

(GENTLE MUSIC)

You want the tour now?

(TANYA LAUGHS)

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

(TANYA GROANS)

Hey.

You want some coffee?

Multiple cups.

(TANYA CHUCKLES)

Right?

Will do.

No, that's what I was saying.

Yeah, they do.

But it seems like everything's
coming together, really.

I know.

Yeah, me, too.

(GENTLE MUSIC)
(SPEECH DROWNED OUT BY MUSIC)

Hey, thanks for last night.

(CHUCKLES) Your trailer
is actually not that bad.

Built for one, but I get it.

Well, in my mind anyway,

my Airstream's always
been kind of a stop gap.

But probably time
for some new digs.

You think?

(UPBEAT MUSIC)

Guys, Mario's comin'.

Gets to Salt Lake
this afternoon,

and he hits Portland tonight.

So it will be late,
but he will be here.

- Oh.
- Yeah.

CARLOS: That's great news.

Make sure and save

- a Calabrese for Mario.
- Rudy, (SPEAKS FAINTLY).

Four or five cars
just pulled up.

Really?

Yeah.

That's great.

Come on, all right, everyone.

Man your stations.

CARLOS: Right,
let's go, everybody.

Woo!

Game time.

(PATRONS CHATTERING)

Welcome to Rising Phoenix.

What are you drinkin'?

(UPBEAT MUSIC)

Hey, Carlos, we
got come customers.

All right.

(ASSERTIVE MUSIC)

I would suggest the Elisa.

It's an original
creation of mine.

But all of the
pies are delicious.

MARIE: Welcome.

What can I get for you?

- Hi.
- Can I get a size sevens?

It's perfect.

Yes.

I can help you.

There you are.

CARLOS: Lookin'
good, lookin' good.

Six more orders, Tio.

All right, let's keep
it movin', everybody.

TANYA: I got it.

BOBBY: Thank you.

All right, what can I get you?

There's a line.

BOBBY: Root beer float.

Thank you.

You got my check?

This ain't a cashier's check.

It's a check, Al.

It's good, just go cash it.

Can't you see I'm slammed?

(SIGHS) You know
somethin', Hoffy,

you're goin' down today.

You're goin' way
down to the ground

where the hedgehogs frown.

God, I love bowling. (LAUGHS)

(CHUCKLES) You had
me goin' there, Al.

Thanks for opening
up this place.

Well, thanks
for all your work.

Hey, can I buy you
and Joe a drink?

We'll have two ice-cold
Budweisers, no more, no less.

I don't have Budweiser.

But I got great organic
pilsner from Bend.

Yeah, we'll have two waters.

No ice.

Two waters, no ice.

Excuse me, I got a
tournament game to play here.

It's lane 23.

Are you Guadalupe?

Como estas?

(UPBEAT MUSIC)

(CROWD CHEERING)

You got this, don't
let him get in your head.

(CROWD CHEERING)

RUDY: Two Elisas, enjoy.

Boom, boom, piping hot.

Here you go, buffalo pesto.

And then another Calabrese.

Enjoy, everybody.

Good.

Can I get some goddamn
service around here?

Ah. (LAUGHS)

You hungry, we're a little busy.

You want a pie?

Sure, I'll take a large
pepperoni, extra cheese.

We don't do that here, bro.

You telling me you
don't have cheese

and fuckin'
pepperoni back there?

Our Napoletano pizzas
are made for scratch,

12 inches in diameter,

four different styles,
no substitutions.

(MUMBLES) No substitutions.

Don't do this, man.

Do you want a pie or not?

Yeah, I'll take a calabrese.

Okay.

- Blade!
- Yes, sir?

Can I get a calabrese for
my bro here, extra spicy.

BLADE: Calabrese, extra
spicy, comin' right up.

PATRON: Can I get
five more margaritas?

(SPEAKS IN SPANISH)
Take these out.

Bam.

Flow, flow, flow, flow, flow.

(UPBEAT MUSIC)

(CROWD GROANS)

Hey, Tanya.

Mm-hmm?

Can you cover the bar
for me when I bowl my game?

Sure.

I'm fine, I'm here.

I scheduled my game
for after the lunch rush.

I guess I just wanted
to see how busy we were.

It's fine.

I'm just gonna be here
all weekend anyway,

'cause Mario asked me to, so.

Oh, yeah?

Why did he ask you to do that?

Just to keep an eye on
things, send him updates.

Huh.

Well, Carlos and I can do that.

Yeah, but he knows I've
worked in a million restaurants.

So have I.

Yes, but he wants
an unbiased opinion.

On what, on me?

Don't be so sensitive.

Mario put his money in, too.

He has a right to ask questions.

I'm his proxy.

Why do you think I've been
hanging out and helping for long?

I don't know, 'cause
I thought you liked me,

or you were enjoying yourself.

I am.

But this is just
part of the job.

Okay.

Look, man, this is like a
super-stressful weekend.

Maybe last night
wasn't the best timing.

But I mean, I can handle it.

Yeah, well, you're the pro.

(TANYA SCOFFS)

Sorry, I didn't, that's
not what I meant.

I can handle it.

I'm sorry.

There's that
14-year-old boy again.

Not always so cute, is he?

CUSTOMER: Hi.

- Hello.
- Can I get a pint

of pilsner, please?

Yes, you may.

(PATRONS CHATTERING)

Hey, Bobby, Carlos needs you.

BOBBY: What's up?

I'm outta dough, man.

Well, just make some more.

It's a complicated
process, bro.

It takes hours and hours.

No.

How many pizzas did you sell?

40,000 grams of flour.

What is that?

- What is that?
- It's over 100 pies.

That's incredible.

Yeah.

All right.

Hey, everybody.

Hey, everybody, hey.

Great day so far.

But we've run our of dough.

(CROWD JEERING)

Yeah, I'm sorry.

I know, I know.

But part of the reason is,

my partner Carlos comes in
here every day, crack of dawn,

makes this delicious
dough with his hands.

That's why it's so good.

And we're probably
gonna run out of dough

at some other time
in the future.

So you're gonna need to
reserve your pies in advance.

Silver lining is that
Rudy's Taqueria is showing up

with their taco truck.

They'll be here soon.

Go get some of that
delicious grub.

Come back in and keep bowling.

Thanks.

(CROWD GRUMBLING)

Thanks, bro.

BOBBY: Sure.

Nice goin'.

We good, Uncle?

Yeah, gracias, Sobrino.

You saved the day.

No te procupes.

Damn, I don't even
have enough dough left

to make Mario his Calabrese.

You're gonna have
to freeze the dough.

That way you never run out.

I have a 100-year
mother yeast starter

in my kitchen, Rudy.

Okay, you can't freeze the
dough, mi hijo, that's crazy.

How many times do I have
to explain that to you.

Okay, but now you're
gonna have to hire

a bigger kitchen staff.

You can't teach this in a day.

It takes months, ask Blade.

Well, then I don't
know what to say, Tio.

You're leavin' a lot
of money on the table.

After everything I've
done for you, Bobby,

five years my employee...

You've done nothing for me.

Hey, hey, hey,
let's be cool, guys.

Let's make peace, man.

It's not worth the karma.

I taught you everything
about this business.

I find your confrontational
approach shocking.

Be cool, Kyle, come on.

Carlos, you've really
outdone yourself with this.

You know, I might
put this on my menu.

100% legal.

CARLOS: I'd like
to see you try.

Bobby, he's already
paid and registered.

What are you doing,
that's against the rules.

I've already paid.

I make the rules here.

Oh, I see.

- Oh.
- You want a piece of me?

Bring it on, Superman.

Ooh.

Bring it on.

Vendetta bowl.

Grudge match,

grudge match, grudge match.

Okay.

(DRAMATIC MUSIC)

Close your eyes.

Close your eyes.

What I like to do in the
kitchen is I visualize, right.

I see the heat.

I see the melting cheese.

I see the char on the
crust, the meat so tender.

What are you talking about?

Sorry.

Visualize the lanes, just
you and the shiny hardwood.

Imagine the pins.

Now watch them all fall.

Falling pins falling down.
(IMITATES PINS CRASHING)

Falling pins falling down.
(IMITATES PINS CRASHING)

(DETERMINED MUSIC)

That's what I'm talkin' about.

Great visualization.

Woo!

Don't make me do
the touchdown dance.

Don't, don't do that.

CARLOS: Come on.

Woo!

Yeah!

Bobby!

Oh, man.

The lanes are too slick,
can't keep it in the pocket.

God.

That's 'cause you suck, man.

The lanes are fine.

Who is this?

A much better bowler
than you, jackass.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Easy, guys, there's
kids present.

You wanna see a
real hook stretch?

Stick around for my next round.

Let's go, Joe.

I can't play under
these conditions.

Well, I knew you were a stealer.

So it shouldn't come as a
surprise that you're a cheater.

Kyle, you are a one-percenter

that used to steal
money out of my tip jar.

Why don't you get outta here.

One-percenter?

Bobby, I'm broke.

And I'm not goin' anywhere.

I'll stick around
and watch you lose.

Come on. (MUMBLES)

Go in.

(MACHINE WHIRRING)

Come on.

Put it in, put it in!

(GROANS) Come on.

Go in, go in.

Go in, go in. (GRUNTS)

Hey.

TANYA: Hey.

I have to bowl again.

TANYA: No, ask
Blade or Carlos or...

They don't know their way
around a bar like you do.

Well, find someone who does.

What about Rudy?

Just one more hour.

What if you keep winning?

People think I work here now.

I need to not be doing this.

Well, I don't wanna
damage your reputation,

Oh, you are incredible.

I've been helping
you for months.

You've been helpin' Mario.

Mario's not here.

Well, he'll be here later.

You can give him
your report the.

Actually, no, his
flight was delayed,

and he's not gonna be
here 'til tomorrow now.

Is that why you're so upset?

That has nothing
to do with it.

Tell me the truth.

Last night, was that like,

just taking one for
the team for you?

Wait, what?

Your recon mission
to the trailer.

Was that just due
diligence for Mario?

You are a paranoid
little child.

And this is the last
drink I'm pouring.

I can bartend, Bobby.

No problem.

Seriously, no worries, man.

(ENERGETIC MUSIC)

♪ Woo ♪

♪ In Boomtown ♪

♪ They got the party started ♪
(CROWD CHEERING)

♪ They got their
ducks in a row, row ♪

♪ In Boomtown ♪

♪ They got a million things ♪

♪ That you don't wanna know ♪

♪ Until the sun don't shine ♪

♪ And the wind don't
blow, blow, blow ♪

(CROWD CHEERING)
♪ In Boomtown ♪

You see that, you see that?

♪ They come from California ♪

♪ They come from
Pointe a la Hache ♪

♪ In Boomtown ♪

♪ They got the real dispersant ♪

♪ They got the best
of the batch, yeah ♪

♪ They got that itch ♪

♪ On where you
wanted to scratch ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, woo ♪

- ♪ In Boomtown ♪ - (CROWD CHEERING)
- ♪ I'm smoking ginger pepper ♪ - Damn.

♪ And I'll be pissin'
clean, clean ♪

♪ In Boomtown ♪
(CROWD CHEERING)

- ♪ I'm fishing on the outside ♪
- All right, Al.

♪ Yeah, I'll be makin' ♪

- ♪ The scene ♪
- Yes!

♪ Ooh, in Boomtown ♪

♪ Make your mama
mean, mean, mean ♪

♪ Oh, yeah, in Boomtown ♪

(CROWD CHEERING)

That's it, Bobby.

(CROWD APPLAUDING)

Go, go.

There's no need for hostilities.

(AL LAUGHS)

Here you go, Al.

(CROWD APPLAUDING)

(AL CLAPPING)

(CROWD CHEERING)
(UPBEAT MUSIC)

Yeah, boom!
(CROWD CHEERING)

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

(CROWD APPLAUDING)

Ha.

Yes!

Oh! All day long, all day.

(CROWD CHEERING)

(CROWD GROANING)
(AL GRUMBLES)

(CROWD CLAPPING RHYTHMICALLY)

(TENSE MUSIC)

(CROWD CHEERING)

BLADE: There you go.

Yo, Bobby's got a
perfect game goin'.

Vamos.

Ra, ra, ra, yay.

Hey, Kyle, you wanna
join us and go watch Bobby?

Hell no, I taught you
everything you know,

and then you go and abandon me.

Ah, I feel like a jerk.

I'm gonna go home.

Nobody gives a shit.

(CROWD CHEERING)

(CROWD GROANING)

Hey.

Hey, hey.

You got this, Hoffy.

It wasn't my night.

Now it's yours for the taking.

So go ahead, just put your
boot on my neck and break it.

Put me outta my misery, bigshot.

Break my neck with a 300 score.

This is what I live for,
okay, Hoffy, frame 10.

I can smell the turkey
cooking already.

I can smell the
turkey cooking, Bob.

(AL SMOOCHES)

(CROWD CHEERING)

Visualize. (IMITATES
STRIKE SOUND)

(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)

(CROWD APPLAUDING)

(PINS CLATTERING)

(CROWD CHEERING)

(TENSE MUSIC)

(CROWD GROANING)

(CROWD CHEERING)

(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)

(BALL RUMBLING)

(CRASH ECHOING)

(CROWD CHEERING)

(TRIUMPHANT MUSIC)

So on behalf of Rudy's
Taqueria,

we would like to present this
check for $2,000 to the winner

of the first annual Rising
Phoenix Bowling Tournament.

BOTH: Bobby Hoffman.

(CROWD APPLAUDING)

Bobby!

Hey, thanks.

Why don't you hold it, thanks.

You guys are awesome, thanks.

I should first
thank our partner,

who is not here today, Mario,
'cause he predicted this.

How he knew that, I don't know.

And of course, Tanya, who,
(PATRONS CLAPPING)

well, I just wanna say thank you

for all the time
that you've put on.

Sorry.

I just can't even believe
we've pulled this off.

Also, of course, Rudy
and Marie and Guadalupe,

and Blade and Liz, and
everybody else that's helped.

Of course, Al and Joe,

couldn't have pulled
this off without you.

I just wanna say one
special thing to Carlos.

Finally, you have the kitchen

to do what you love and do best.

I love you, man.

(CROWD CHEERING)

Thanks, thanks.

Congratulations.

So I just sign the
back of it, right?

(PULSING UPBEAT MUSIC)

BLADE: Hey,
you want one more?

Thank you, Blade.

That one is
definitely on the house.

Think I earned it?

Yeah, you sure did.

That was, like, crazy.

You're a local hero.

That was incredible.

I don't know.

But I would like to apologize

for making such a
ridiculous fool of myself.

I don't get what I want,

and then I just say
the stupidest things.

I'm sorry.

Dude.

It was a solid opening night,
and we had a good time, right?

So let's just leave it at that.

That's it then?

Yeah.

You need to take care
of yourself, Bobby.

This heaviness that
you're carrying around,

it's really not working for you.

I mean, these could be the
best years of your life.

Do you realize that?

You need to finish that book.

And then you need to stop
drawing pictures of your ex.

Because it's very sweet,
but it's really a turnoff.

I really let you
down, didn't I?

Me, no.

You disappointed you.

I am fine.

I can take care of myself.

I am a grown woman.

You need to celebrate.

You deserve this,
you earned it, too.

Come on.

Hey, Tanya, join us.

See.

(CARLOS SPEAKS FAINTLY)

Mornin', fellas.

BOBBY: Morning, sir.

Bigshot, day two.

Beautiful day.

(PINBALL MUSIC)

(MACHINE PLINKING)

Fuck.

Okay.

Hey, Bobby, it's Al.

His check didn't clear.

Fuck.

What happened?

None of his
numbers are working.

You haven't gotten
ahold of him yet?

No.

What about Jenny?

I just tried calling her,

and her number is
out of service, too.

Are you fucking kidding me?

He was also a signer.

There's over 90
grand in there.

He's emptied our accounts?!

We don't know that yet.

Maybe he moved the
money to an account

with a higher interest rate.

Maybe he just decided
to close his office.

Wake up!

Tanya, there's gotta
be someone around here

that knows him, right, someone?

What about the weed guys,
the Phoenix Farm guys?

Yeah, what about them?

Their accounts have also
been emptied, $2 million.

I was one of 12 investors.

Come on, he's famous, Tanya.

I mean, there's gotta be some
other kind of contact info.

He's a fraud.

Mario Bentley Jr.,
even his name's a joke.

How could I have
been so stupid?

Not your fault.

(TANYA GROANS)

BOBBY: We filed
fraud charges.

As far as the law was concerned,
this guy didn't exist.

Mario knew what he was doing.

We tried to keep the place open,

but with no cash, we were
operating month to month.

And all the bowling crowd wanted

was cheap, greasy
food and Budweiser.

Our old equipment
was breaking down,

and we couldn't afford Al.

And besides, Al was suing us.

The landlord seized the
property, and Al took it over.

You know when you think
you're finally going for it,

doing something important,

and the next thing you know,

you don't know what hit you,

and you're right back
where you started?

Are you any wiser now?

You rewind your life to analyze

what went wrong along the way.

Your ex-wife,

(POIGNANT MUSIC)
(TONES TINKLING)

does she ever think of you?

No.

(BOBBY SIGHS)

(MUSIC SWELLS)

So yeah, this is part of our
summer Hawaiian luau theme.

It's part of a
national promotion

celebrating our first Bingos
on Hawaii, the big island.

Here, I saved a blue
one for you, bigshot.

Make sure you get a good fit.

So we'll be having all
kinds of things on our menu.

Poke, it is pronounced
poke, not poke or poke.

We also will be having
huli-huli chicken,

pork bun sliders.

Good.

Great to have an older
person on staff, Bobby.

And also, Bingos
pineapple boat pizza.

This is a boat pizza,
not just a regular pizza.

And that's because
they're going to come

in a boat shape
with a little sail.

(FAN RATTLING)

(BOBBY GROANS)

(BOBBY SIGHS)

(CLOCK TICKING)

(METAL MUSIC IN HEADPHONES)

(MESSAGE WHOOSHES)

(BOBBY SIGHS)

So how come you
never text me back?

I'm here now.

I'm sorry, Bobby.

It wasn't my fault.

They ever gonna
catch that guy?

(SCOFFS) He just
vanished, man.

What a piece of
work that guy was.

I sure would
like my money back.

CARLOS: So how's Bingos?

It's a shitty, homogenized
disaster of a restaurant

owned by a huge,
impersonal conglomerate.

The food's awful, and
I get to wear a lei.

(CARLOS LAUGHS)

Well, I've got some good
news, so just hear me out.

Rudy, Marie, and my father

are bankrolling
my new restaurant.

You want a better job?

(CELLPHONE BUZZING)

I don't know.

Well, you don't
have to answer now.

We open next month.

Just drop by and see us.

430 Main, are you kidding?

No, Kyle went out
of business, man.

They evicted him.

Rudy knows the landlord.

Fuckin' Kyle.

Well, I guess there is
some justice in the world.

So you're openin' this restaurant
instead of payin' me back?

Bobby, I didn't
steal your money, bro.

You need to get over it, dude.

Easy for you to say.

I lost all my cash, too.

Tanya and her cousins lost
$200,000, and they got over it.

Even Al laughs about it now.

God, if it's not my
fault, then it's Tanya's.

If it's not Tanya's fault,
then it's the aliens.

You know, Tanya was right.

You really are like 14, man.

Your aliens, you ever thought

that maybe they're
tryin' to help you?

You ever think about that?

(DOOR JINGLING)

(VOICEMAIL BEEPING)

DAVID: Hey, Bobby, David
Brinker, Curly Mullet Comics.

Sorry it took me so
long to get back to you.

But I really dig the
writing sample you sent.

I think there's
some potential here.

Anyway, I'd love to see the
whole "Phoenix, Oregon" book

if you have it.

Thanks, man.

Okay.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay.

(GENTLE MUSIC)

They actually
coincide, so like,

then there's times we could do
a little something for them.

Hi, Bobby.

I quit.

What?

You're a great
boss, Stacy, truly.

But I can't work here anymore.

What are you, wait a,

wait, you're leaving now?

You're quitting now?

You're not even...
(DOOR RATTLES)

(BUOYANT MUSIC)

TANYA: People
need to see this,

otherwise it's not a book.

It doesn't count.

CARLOS: Well, you know what
should really freak you out?

Getting old, not going
after your dreams

when you had a chance.

Oh, that's it, bro,
you could roll.

I remember.

BOBBY: It's a
completely useless talent.

Maybe I should learn
how to salsa dance.

TANYA: Maybe you
should. (LAUGHS)

CARLOS: This place,
it's my destiny, Bobby.

I know it is.

TANYA: You need to take
care of yourself, Bobby.

I mean, these could be the
best years of your life.

Do you realize that?

(LIGHTHEARTED PIANO MUSIC)

Hoffman, what's goin' on?

Hey.

Bobby.

Wow.

MARIE: Finally made it in.

The place feels so different.

We open in two weeks.

Is Carlos around?

Let me go get him.

Can I get you a little
somethin', somethin'?

Oh, just water.

Come on.

Go for it.

All right, thanks, Rudy.

I hope whatever you're
drinking goes well

with an Elisa or a Calabrese.

You're not makin'
pies right now, are ya?

Oh, yeah, in our new
wood-fired oven as we speak.

Hold on a sec.

Tanya.

It's so good to see you.

What you got for me?

You can't beat
Quady North Syrah.

They sell their
premiere by the bottle

but their standard by the glass.

And it's as good
as any mid-range

from Napa or Santa Barbara.

I love your palate.

Right?

Oh, my god, delicious.

Hey, Bobby.

Come try this, bro.

Ooh.

Mm, I think my pies gonna
taste so much better

in this place.

TANYA: Yeah.

Full respect, you were
built for this business.

Bien gracias.

Hey, why don't
you stay for dinner?

It's just familia.

Marie, Rudy, can you help me
put these tables together?

What's up?

Why you lookin' at me like that?

I didn't expect
to run into you.

Carlos, I have a few other
stops to make today, so.

Well, why don't you
stay at least for a slice.

I mean, see how
my pies translate

in this new wood-fire oven.

I'm gonna take a rain check
on that, but keep the bottles.

- Let me know what you think.
- Okay.

You got it.

All right, have a good one.

What'd you say to her?

You're really gonna
hold these grudges

the rest of your life?

You still want
me to work here?

With equity to make
up for what happened.

BOBBY: You don't
have to do that.

I want to.

You're my bro.

Thanks, man.

Hey!

Wait.

Sorry.

That's not what I meant to say.

Well, that is what you said.

And I haven't seen
you in a long time.

It was weird.

Yeah, I just got surprised,
and it came out wrong.

So I don't blame you,

or Carlos, or aliens.

I don't even blame
myself anymore,

mostly because that bowling
alley was the best thing

to happen to me in a long time,

working with everybody and
getting to know you, so.

Do you want to come back

and see how that
crust translates?

It's okay, you don't,
maybe another time.

No worries.

(GENTLE PIANO MUSIC)

Sit down, sit down primos.

There's more slices coming.

(CROWD CHATTERING)

Wow, Blade.

Rudy, you got 'em?

Really good, good.

Right on time, I knew you guys

- couldn't resist.
- Hello, I'm just staying

for a quick slice.

Oh, come on, come
on, right here.

I really do have a
lot of meetings today.

Oh, you're gonna enjoy this.

I know I'm gonna love it.

Papa... papa!

All right.

I'm ready.

♪ Little bird ♪

See, they're very

(SPEECH DROWNED OUT BY MUSIC)
♪ Let me sing for you, you ♪

I don't wanna hear

(SPEECH DROWNED OUT BY MUSIC)
♪ Sing for me ♪

♪ You added branches
to my family tree ♪

♪ And you ♪

♪ Fill me full of life ♪

RUDY: Delicioso.

That's delicious.

Salud.

GROUP: Salud.

♪ I hope this song ♪

♪ Will give you insight
to right and wrong ♪

♪ I hope that I allow
you to make mistakes ♪

♪ And spread your little wings ♪

♪ There are times that I
have been self-centered ♪

♪ Self-destructive
and a sinner ♪

♪ I hope one day,
this point in time ♪

♪ You'll see I was
trying to grow ♪

♪ There are no rules
for us together ♪

♪ You fly away and
molt your feathers ♪

♪ I hope that I
don't judge you ♪

♪ Or you don't judge me too ♪

(STIRRING MUSIC)

MAN: These instruments
detect the unseen forces

that swirl around
these distant worlds.

MAN: Life, even
on the outer planets,

would be extinguished.

MAN: Staring
into the unknown.

The unknown.

(ASSERTIVE MUSIC)