Paying Guests (2009) - full transcript

After Bhavesh, Parag, Parikshat, and Jayesh ridicule their Bangkok-based landlord, Kiska Meglani, he evicts them. Broke and with nowhere to go, the hapless foursome decide to pose as couples, with Bhavesh and Parag assuming the guise of voluptuous females, Karishma and Kareena respectively. They find a sympathetic landlord, Ballu Singh, who lets them move in. Subsequently, Jayesh finds employment in an architectural firm and assures his friends that their problems may well be resolved. But before that could happen, Ballu's wife, Sweety, comes to know that Kareena is pregnant, and the involvement of gangsters who want a signed deed from Ballu at any and all costs.

Wake up!

Wake up, you lazy people! It's late.

Are all of you dead?

Wake up!

Parag! Parikshit! Bhavesh!

Wake up. It's time for my flight.

If you're dead, then say so.

We're up, man.

Let me open the door, first!
You wanna crash through it?

Did you guys understand anything,

or are you just nodding your heads?



-Hello, Bhavesh.
-Yes.

Yes, Mr. Kiska.
You're going to India for a few days,

and as always we have to
follow your instructions.

-Parag.
-We will do it everyday!

Cleaning! We'll do it, Mr. Kiska.

-Parikshit.
-Trust me, Mr. Kiska.

We will look after this house
as our own house.

Don't you dare consider this house
as your own!

You all are paying guests.
Paying guests.

I am the owner.
The sole owner, Kiska Miglani.

Who is the owner?

You, Mr. Kiska Miglani.

-Thank you. And my rent?
-Yes, sir.

-Are you giving it now?
-No, I am just a little itchy.



All of you will rot!

You'll never improve.

When I couldn't reform, how will you?

Look, I want my rent when I'm back.

You know Kiska Miglani very well.

Oh, cab driver!
Why are you staring at me? Let's go.

Kiska Miglani.

We hope we get the news of your death
and not of your arrival.

Hey, guys.
Good Mo...

Good afternoon. How are you?
And where is your boss?

Where is Ballu Singh?

Ballu Singh is here.

What is your reason
for coming late today?

Sir. Sir.

Sorry, sir.
I had gone to get a haircut.

You went for a hair cut
at the time of work.

Sir, my hair grew
while I was working, right?

Forgive me, sir. I made a mistake.

No, I made a mistake.

I employed a foolish,
lazy man who is never on time.

Look at this, sir. You made a mistake.
And you're firing me.

I am rectifying my mistake. Got it?

Is this the age to rectify things?

-Get lost! Otherwise, I will go mad.
-You are already mad, Sir.

My business is not doing well.
And you are so lazy.

The business is bound to not do well, Sir.

Look at this. You are serving
ancient recipes to the customers.

For so long, I have been saying that
I'll cook something new.

I will do some new experiments.
But you do not agree.

-Your parents conducted an experiment too.
-Is that so?

This is the result.

Sir, you're getting personal.
You're insulting me.

Was I honoring you until now?
Was I praising you?

Sir, give me a last chance.

It's the final warning. Okay?

Bring the clothes on time. Okay?

Clothes?

From the laundry.
Why are you pulling my chain?

Do you want to strangle me?

Sir, I am a chef.

-Okay. But you're late.
-Sir.

Yes.

Yes.

I got it. Wow! Thank you.
Thank you so much.

Okay. I will come. Thank you.

-Listen.
-Is anybody there?

Will somebody tell me
why I am going to the market?

What did you say?

I am a bad cook!

I have got a job in a seven-star hotel.

As a supervisor chef. Got it?

With my first salary, I will buy a
packet of chilli powder for you.

-Do you know what you will do with it?
-What?

-Apply it on your backside.
-No.

I don't want you and your ordinary job.
Got it?

Hello.

Yes. Hang on. Hang on.

-Now, hear it. Hear it, Mr. Ballu.
-Yes. Tell me, ma'am.

-Ma'am, not Makhwana.
-Sisodiya.

-Verma.
-Verma. Verma.

Yes, ma'am. Bhavesh Verma.

Miss, please understand.
Please understand. Look...

This is a powerful car...
only for powerful people.

Only a tough man like you
can handle this steering.

This is a smooth ride only
for the young generation.

I can't imagine this steering wheel
in the hand of an old man.

Perfect and experienced people like
you don't care for the price, sir.

Sir, don't mind. If I had been your son
and not the salesman

then I would have said,
"Dad, buy it for mom."

"Because like her, this car too
will stay by your side all your life."

If I had been your boyfriend
and not the salesman

then I would have said just
one thing upon buying this car.

What will you accept? Cheque or cash?

If it's a cheque, get it enchashed.

And itf it's cash, check it thoroughly!

Will you take four weeks
to write just four lines?

I am done.

-Read it out.
-Listen.

The anchor says,
"Welcome, my friends."

"We present our today's
episode which is like"

"the moonlight, a trip to the
stars, like the goat's skin"

"like the fairy's leg."

You will die a slow death.

Frustrated writer,
you think you are very smart.

Tell me. If you had been in my place
what would you have written?

Look, a poet is being introduced.

Obviously, it should begin with a poem.

For instance,
"Tears are flowing

Wounds are fresh.
I am healing it with the balm of words.

And to take your hearts away, today
in our studio we have with us

such a personality
whose words have...

He is speaking my lines.
He is taking my shot.

-Shut up. Cut it.
-What shut up?

He is speaking my words.

Wonderful lines! What words!

What is this?

Papers. These are the restaurant's papers.

It's written that you are giving me
the permission to sell this restaurant.

-What?
-Yes, my dear brother.

I will sell this restaurant
and recover my share of money.

Sell the restaurant?

I should sell this restaurant?
I should sell my father's dream?

I should sell it to a useless,
rogue man like you?

I, too, am the son of the man
you call your father.

-I have a right to this restaurant.
-Right?

The people who fulfill their duties
talk about rights.

What duty did you fulfill as a son?

You splurged your share of money.

Now, only this restaurant is left.
It's father's last memento.

And you want to sell this too.

Listen to me carefully.

I won't even sell a single brick
of this restaurant.

Who would buy a brick?

The entire restaurant will be sold.

Either while you're alive
or after your death.

I give you a week's time.

If you don't sell this restaurant
and give me my share

then you know my power.

-Ronnie.
-Hello, Mr. Singh. How are you?

Will I get something to eat?
I am very hungry.

Mr. Ballu Singh, is everything fine?

Yes, Inspector. Everything is fine.

I am his younger brother, Ronnie.

-Lonnie?
-Not Lonnie. Ronnie.

Ronnie. He means to say Ronnie.

That's what I am saying.
My name is Ronnie.

And, this knife?

This knife is our father's
last memento.

He was a chef. He would cut onions
and tomatoes with this knife.

Right, brother?

I'm leaving. I will come next week.

I don't need an explanation.
I want results.

Lazy fellow.
Everybody wants salary for free.

Go complete the weekly sales report.

Go. Get lost.

Why are you laughing, Mr. Trust Me?
You're next.

How many times I have told you
to stand straight in front of me?

I heard you were late again today.

Will you just stand over my head
or will you sit too?

Thank you.

Ma'am, didn't you hear?
I sold two cars today.

-I heard it. Good.
-This is my work.

Flirting with female customers.
Thinking that you're a film hero.

This is your full time job.

Right?

I do it for free, ma'am.
I am sorry. I was...

Your cell is ringing, ma'am.

Whatever.

-I was--
-Taking advantage of the situation!

Whether you sell the car or not,
you will surely entice a girl. Right?

-Ma'am, your--
-Yes, this is my office.

This is the final warning.

Ma'am, your...

-You!
-But, ma'am...

Okay. That's enough!
I can't take it anymore.

I quit!

I can't work with an insolent
and arrogant girl like you.

-How dare you!
-You are sick. You are mad. You're crack!

Ma'am, life is like an echo sound.

When you ask a question,
you get your answer.

So, please rise above this hatred.

And give your life a chance to breathe.
Please, just relax.

Rajan gives my lines to others.

What do you think? I don't know
what his writing capabilities are?

If you know his writing capabilities...

Sorry.

Yes, if you know his writing capabilities
then why don't you do anything?

How can I do anything?

You know that Rajan has been
recommended by the channel head.

And there is my father too.

-Where are you going?
-In your cabin.

Father has given strict instructions.
You can't enter my cabin alone.

Okay. I am not alone.
My feelings are with me. Let's go.

-What happened?
-It's torn.

-What?
-My pant.

Parag! Father will come.

Come on. Wear the costumes
that are kept inside for the show.

Seema. Open the door.

-Father.
-Father.

I say, open the door.

Your father always appears
at the wrong time.

I know that the rascal is inside.

Where? Where is that rascal, Parag?
Where is he?

Parag? Who?

Oh, Parag! He didn't come here.

He did, I know it!

The security guard told me.
I won't spare him. Parag.

Father, believe me.
I am your own blood.

That's why I can't believe you.
That rascal is here!

I will find him and I won't spare him.

Move.

Rascal!

Can I talk now?

-Rascal, I won't spare you!
-I need insurance!

Arpita, don't cry.
Look, I am all right.

You start crying over trivial issues.

At least relax today.
You know I am leaving, right?

Sorry.

What time is the flight?

At 2 o'clock. What about you?
When are you coming to Pattaya?

The joining date will be
confirmed tomorrow.

Your job is confirmed.

Life will be set when my job
gets confirmed too.

Listen, don't flirt with girls
in Pattaya.

I never do bad deeds.

If I do good deeds,
I will be with you.

If I do bad deeds,
I will go to hell.

Hell!

Okay. Where will you live in Pattaya?

My cousin Parikshit is there.

I will directly head to his bungalow
from the airport.

Mr. Singh.

So what if I lost the job?
I don't even care.

What does Aarti ma'am
think of herself?

Don't I have any self-respect?

Mr. Singh, I will call you back.

Parikshit, forget your self-respect.

And entice him.

Bhavesh.

Where were you, Bhavesh?
Where were you?

I was really missing you.

Why?

What do you mean?
Can't a friend miss another friend?

I mean, we are best friends.
We are like brothers.

You don't believe in brotherhood?

What's this nonsense. Are you okay?

-Actually, I was just thinking about us.
-Us?

I meant the three of us,
the Three Musketeers.

God forbid, if anything
happens to any one of us,

if there is any problem...

For instance?

For example, you lose your job.

You become unemployed.

You don't have a penny.

You don't have anything to eat,
nothing to wear.

Who will support you?

Who? Who?

I am here! Your friend. Your best friend.
Your brother. Brotherhood!

Really?

Naturally. Now look...

Let go of me.

-Okay, imagine that I have lost my job.
-Don't say that.

-Hypothetically.
-Okay.

Won't you support me
if I become unemployed?

Of course. Without question!
I am your friend.

-A burden has been lifted from my heart.
-Yes. Me too.

-I wanted to say something.
-Me too.

I lost my job.

Me too.

-What?
-What?

I was missing you people so much!

Actually, I was just thinking about us.

Us three friends.
The Three Musketeers.

We are like brothers, man. Brothers!

What? You guys don't
believe in brotherhood?

God forbid, if a calamity befalls
one of us.

For instance?

-Like, if you both lose your job.
-We have lost our jobs.

How will we survive
until we get a new job?

Don't worry. I have some savings.
We will use it.

No. You have saved that money to
send to India. It's for your family.

Aren't you both a part of my family?

Don't talk nonsense. Chill.

Look, the problem won't be solved
by just talking about it.

Let's go and look for
some new jobs. All right?

Yes, let's not blow the jobs this time.

-Come on.
-Let's go.

Hang on.

-All this is fine. But what about him?
-Who?

Exactly. Kiska Miglani.

As soon as he returns, he will say,
"Who is the owner of the house?"

Kiska. Kiska Miglani.

-I can't do mimicry.
-Who will pay the rent?

We will cross that bridge
when we come to it.

First, let's solve the problem
regarding the job.

Pray that there is no new problem.

Okay, okay.
We've reached.

-Hello.
-Hello.

-Are you going in there?
-Yes.

Can you tell me

-who is the owner of the house?
-Kiska.

-This house.
-Kiska.

Who is the owner of this house?

Kiska. Can I go?

-Where are you going?
-Inside.

-Where, inside?
-In the house.

I am talking about the same house.
Who is the owner?

Kiska.

-Okay. What is this?
-An entrance.

-What is beyond that?
-A porch.

-Beyond that?
-A house.

I am talking about the same house.
Who is the owner of this house?

-Kiska.
-Can't you see this house?

Hang on. What are you doing?
What's your problem?

Thank God, you're here.
He drove me crazy!

I asked him a simple question.

Look what he has done to me.

You're here now. You tell me.
Whose house is this?

Kiska's.

Why are you repeating after me?
Don't you understand Hindi?

Of course, I do!
I am telling you. It's Kiska's.

-This house! This house!
-What?

-Who is the owner?
-Kiska.

Who is the owner of this house?

Why are you beating him up?
Who are you?

-Jayesh!
-Pari!

Do you know him?

Couldn't you have called before coming?

I called you so many times.

But your number was not reachable.

Okay. Now that you're here,
keep in touch. Cheers.

Keep in touch?

I have come to stay here.

-Where?
-With you.

-Any problem?
-No. Look, Jayesh.

Kiska Miglani, the owner of this house

is the most heartless
and grumpy man in the world.

-That's the problem.
-Why don't you leave this house then?

Look, my friend. This is Pattaya.

It's easy to score a date here.

But it's difficult to get
a house and a job.

We can't afford to pay the
advance rent and the deposit.

Kiska Miglani didn't take deposit
and advance from us.

Yet he lets us live here.
So, we have to tolerate him.

Look, I am going to
get a flat with my job.

If I get the job
you guys can live with me.

Great!

I will pack my bags.

Wait. Let me get the job first.

-When will you get the job?
-After the interview.

-When is the interview?
-In two days.

Two days? We give you two days.
You deserve it.

Cheers!

The girls are fast
but the service is slow.

Thank you.

Where are you guys going?

-No, thanks. I don't drink.
-Why?

It's a sin to drink.
And those who commit sin, go to hell.

This is not liquor.
This is sherbet.

Yes. Bangkok's bamboo juice.

-This is bamboo juice.
-Yes.

-I can drink that.
-Bamboo.

I am sitting beside you.
Just repeat what I say. Got it?

-But I...
-We'll convince her, trust me.

Okay.

Greet her.

-Hi.
-Hello.

Introduce yourself.

I'm Bhavesh.

Hello, I'm Maria.

You are very beautiful.

You are very beautiful.

Thank you.

Your hair is like a flowing melody.

Your hair is like a flowing melody.

Your eyes are like
steaming hot black coffee.

Your eyes are like
steaming hot black coffee.

Your lips are like
yummy strawberry ice cream.

Your lips are like
yummy strawberry ice cream.

-Rate?
-What's your rate?

Oh no!

I'm sorry.

Kiska, where are you?

Are you here?

Wait. I will kill you today.

Stop it.

What happened?

It's his photograph.

All right then,
come out of the photograph.

He is not in this country.

Good that he is not in this country.

Otherwise, I would have killed him
and gone to hell today.

Did you see how much my brother loves me?

If Kiska had been here, then...

-He won't come here. He is a coward.
-Correct.

I am tolerating him
for the sake of the house.

Otherwise, I would have
thrashed him long ago.

-Mr. Kiska is not so bad.
-What?

I feel like stabbing him.

You're right. He is an idiot.

For instance, his name. Kiska Miglani.

What kind of a person
has a question for a name?

When he wants to talk to us
on the phone

he gives us a missed call.

So that we call him back.

And pay for listening to his nonsense.

Correct.

You are not correct.

Why are you feeling bad?

Just now you were saying,
"I will kill him and go to hell."

"I won't spare him."

-What?
-You said you won't spare him.

Stop it, Bhavesh. Stop it.

No. Laugh!
Look at his face and laugh.

He is standing like this.

Say more.

Say more. Go on.

-We are fools and idiots.
-Yes.

-What are you saying?
-Yes.

We couldn't recognise Mr. Kiska.

Mr. Kiska!

Why are you addressing
a beggar respectfully?

I am telling you, Parag.

Once we get a permanent
place to stay, I will...

take his blessing.

I will touch his feet
and take his blessing.

His mother, who gave birth
to such a great man

is not an ordinary mother.

When did you return, Kiska?
You didn't tell us.

You should have given us
a missed call.

Idiots!
Get out!

I'm tired of telling you guys
not to drink so much!

But no, one for the road,
one on the road.

One bloody under the road.

Now, look! We are on the road.

Initially, we just lost our job
and now, our house is lost too.

Why are you telling us? Tell him.
All this happened because of him.

We were celebrating
his arrival, weren't we?

Am I the first baby
born into your family in 14 years?

Why were you celebrating
my arrival?

Could I have a dream that
Kiska's flight would be canceled

and he will come back?

You're talking nonsense.

Now, the question is
where will we live?

Okay. Don't stress out. Let it be.

Jayesh will get a job in two days.

-And we will get a house to stay. Right?
-Yes.

Hey!

The interview is after two days.

After the interview
I will get the job and then get my house.

It will take around 20-25 days.

-20-25.
-What are you saying?

Look, we can do one thing.

We all will contribute
and collect the deposit.

So that we can get a
small house on rent.

This is my contribution.

Here.

This is mine.

Hey! This is nothing.

Exactly. We have nothing.

What?

Because we have to send more
than half the money to our families.

We spend the remaining on our survival.
In short, nothing.

Forget it.
Why are you getting serious?

Since college, we have faced
all the ups and downs together.

So what if our time is bad today?
At least, we have each other.

We will face this problem together too.
Applause.

-Okay.
-We have to do one thing now.

We need to find a house where we don't
have to pay the deposit.

and the rent fits our budget too.

That too within 24 hours.

Otherwise, we will have
to sleep on the street.

What are we waiting for?
Let's go for it.

Are we going to look for a house
or play a hockey match?

It's the same thing.

Yes!

Hello. Yes, Parikshit. Any news?

No, Mr. Singh.

It's hard to find a house anyway,

and when we do, it doesn't fit our budget.

Try there. Maybe you will get it.

Okay. What's the address?

-You always forget. Remember it.
-Sit. Sit.

-Tell me. What's the matter?
-Mr. Ballu, we want your room on rent.

Why will I give my personal room on rent?

I will only give that room
which is on lease.

-I am talking about the same room.
-So, say mango.

Mango.

But it's the season of oranges.
Why should we say mango?

I meant to say, "just like that."

Look, we have decided.
We will give that room to a mango man.

-Mango man?
-The common man.

-It's the same thing.
-They don't know.

-Okay. Quickly. Give us your infection.
-Infection?

-Introduction.
-It's the same thing.

-They don't know.
-Yes.

I am Parikshit Pandey.
He is my brother Jayesh Thakur.

-Did you like our house?
-It's beautiful.

-We've got ACs everywhere.
-Wow!

ACs everywhere!

It's very cold during winter.
It's very hot during summer.

Even though there is an AC?

AC doesn't mean air-conditioner.
It means According to Climate.

Yes.

-Mr. Ballu.
-Yes.

-Tell them your conditions.
-Yes.

The first condition is that...
the rent is 20,000 baht.

You won't give me any deposit
or advance money. Is it acceptable?

-Yes.
-Yes.

The second condition is...

Drinking, smoking and coming late at night
is not allowed in this house.

-Women stay in this house.
-Women?

-It's not acceptable? Leave it. Get lost.
-No. Women meaning?

My sister-in-law. Sweety's younger sister.
They stay with us.

They have gone out of town.
Is it acceptable?

She is your sister-in-law.

Whether you let her stay here or not
that's none of our concern.

-Are the conditions acceptable?
-Yes. They're acceptable.

They're acceptable.

Mr. Ballu, the third condition.

The third condition.
Are you married?

No. We are not married.

What! Look, we will give
our room only to couples.

You wasted my time. I can't stay
in this house a moment longer.

Let's go. Come on.

Mr. Ballu, what are you doing?
This is our house.

Are you seizing it? Leave. Get lost.

-Mr. Ballu, listen to us. Mr. Ballu.
-Leave!

-Mr. Ballu!
-Listen.

We are married.

Yes.

Hang on. Jayesh just said,
"We are not married."

You didn't hear it right,
you didn't hear it right.

He said, "We're newly married."

Right, Jayesh?

Newly married.
We heard, not married.

-Look.
-Look.

Mr. Ballu, I understood.
They are newly welded.

-Welded?
-Wedded.

-It's the same thing.
-They don't know.

So, both the couples
will move in tomorrow.

Yes. For sure.

Okay. We are leaving.
We will meet tomorrow morning.

-Take care, Sweety.
-I will take it.

-Take care, Mr. Ballu.
-He will also take it.

-And you also take it.
-We will.

Look, we don't have any other option.
Please try this size.

To hell with you
and your stupid idea. Got it?

Am I asking you to get a sex change?

I am just asking you for a dress change.

Just for a few days.

Once Jayesh gets the flat...
we will stop this drama.

-Promise.
-Explain it to him, please.

There is a difference
between male and female.

There is a difference
between real and fake.

We will be caught in a jiffy.
Got it?

That's what I am saying.
They won't come to know.

I have met them. They both are idiots.
They look like idiots.

It's very easy to fool them
for a few days.

Come on. Try this size.
Look at both these dresses.

Superb. It will suit the both of you.
Sexy.

Listen, we are not
doing the right thing.

I know. It's not right.
But it's not wrong either.

Because we are not
committing a theft.

We are not committing a robbery.
We are not stealing from anybody.

They need paying guests.
And we will stay as paying guests.

-Okay.
-What? I won't do this.

Hang on.

Guys, please.

We don't have a job.
We don't have a house.

It's really important. Please.

Okay. Okay. Paying guests.
First problem solved.

What will we do
about the second problem?

-What?
-This problem.

Oh, God.

That's why you told me to
buy the tennis balls.

Now our honor is in your hands.

I don't know why, but I feel
they will dishonor us very soon.

-Hello.
-Hello. Come. Come.

-Sweety, she is...
-Karishma.

-She is Karishma.
-Karishma.

-His wife.
-His.

His wife.

-And she is Kareena.
-Hi.

His wife.

-Jayesh's wife?
-Yes.

Isn't she too tall?

You see, we both got married
when we were kids.

I was born.
He was... not born properly.

-But the wedding went well.
-Okay.

Now, he looks like this.
And I look like this.

Sweety, which company's tea bag is this?

There is no color, no taste.
It smells different.

-What are you doing, Mr. Ballu?
-What happened?

This is not a tea bag.
It's my father's talisman.

Where did you keep it?

Damn. Come on.

Come here. Meet him.

-He is Mr. Ballu. My husband.
-Okay.

-Hello.
-Hello.

God bless you. God bless you.

Mr. Ballu, she is Kareena.

-She has got newly married to Jayesh.
-Okay.

And she is Karishma.
Where is Karishma?

We are family.
Why are you feeling shy?

-Mr. Ballu.
-Yes.

She is my wife. Check her out.

Hello.

She is a beautiful girl.

Yes. She is beautiful.

-She is beautiful.
-Yes.

If you like her so much then
we will keep her with you.

You can see her closely
with a magnifying glass. Okay?

-Fool.
-What?

-Where?
-What?

-Where is our room?
-Room. Your room is there.

Come on. Let's go.

-Sweety.
-Yes.

-This Karishma.
-Yes.

She seems to be familiar.

Mr. Ballu, you think talismans
and tea bags are the same.

And you're saying
Karishma looks familiar.

I think you're not in your senses.

This is the only place in all of Pattaya?

What's the problem? What happened?

I used to work for Ballu Singh.
He had fired me.

What? I told you.
We all will go to hell. Come on.

Stop, Jayesh. Bhavesh, listen.

If Ballu had to recognise you then
he would have by now.

It's just for a few days.
Nothing will happen. Trust me.

-Can I come inside?
-Come.

I was saying that
today's meal is on our behalf.

Get ready soon.
We are waiting. Okay.

We will come. We will come.

We will come for sure.

What are you doing? Naughty.

Okay.

-What are you doing? Where are you going?
-Sorry. Sorry.

Is it difficult for you
to live like a normal guy?

What is your problem?
This is the limit.

What do you think?
I write the script of my life on my own?

I don't like to be a girl. Got it?

Seema, open the door.

Seema, open the door.

Open. Open the door.

If I ask you if Parag was here,
you will say no.

-So, I won't ask you.
-Then?

I will catch him. I will catch
that rascal. And I will thrash him.

-I won't spare him today.
-Father.

Believe me, Father. He is not here.

Great!
Move!

Rascal!

I told you. He is not here.

Father, I am your own blood.

-I won't spare him today.
-Father.

Father.

Rascal!

Rape!

Seema, Seema, save me.

-This goon will rape me. Who's this letch?
-No. I...

I am ruined.

He showed me the knife and
God knows what all he saw.

This lustful man.

Call the police. Call the media.

Call the press.
Call Rakhi Sawant. I will expose him!

I will expose him.

-Kareena, please stop it.
-What?

-He is my father.
-Yes.

I am her father. I am your father.
I am everybody's father.

Father figure.

What kind of father is he?

He brandishes the knife and
checks me out.

Oh, God.

I am sorry. It's my mistake.
It's a misunderstanding. I am sorry.

Who is she?

Father, she is Kareena. My friend.

She had come for script-writing.
Now, she is leaving.

-Yes. I am going to the police.
-Good.

Police.

-Mother.
-I am not your mother.

-Okay. I'm sorry. Don't call the police.
-Why?

-Because he is my father.
-So?

Your father doesn't have
the right to dishonor me. Got it?

My honor is more precious
than your father's honor.

People didn't even spare the moon.

So, how will they
spare a vulnerable woman?

People will continue
to point fingers at her.

And she will continue
to feel suffocated.

I won't endure this
suffocation anymore, Seema.

Instead of being defamed...
it's better that

I expose this so-called decent man.

-I found it.
-What?

I found the writer.

What a dialogue!
What words! Marvelous!

The metaphor of the moon
and the defamation of a woman.

Marvelous. You're my permanent
script-writer.

Action.

-Hi, Singh.
-Parikshit, how come you're here?

-I have come to take my due cheque.
-You won't get it.

-Why?
-Because Aarti ma'am has said so.

Aarti ma'am has said this?

-I want to talk to you.
-Me too.

Hold on. Hold on.
If you think I have come to say sorry...

I am sorry.

Sorry?

I don't understand.

Parikshit, everybody's life
is not the same.

I saw my life through
my daddy's point of view.

After his divorce, I saw him
fighting with his own self.

I too became like him.

Angry with myself, angry with life and
angry with everybody.

When I realised it's my own life...

I also realised that...

I have the right to live it
on my own terms.

When I did this, then I realised
I didn't lose anything.

Good morning.

-Good morning?
-Good morning for a new life.

And...

Thank you.

-Good morning, Sir. Sir...
-Forget it.

-What?
-Your introduction.

I know. You are architect Jayesh Thakur
from India.

-You have sent designs for our new plant.
-Sir, my designs...

-Forget it.
-What, sir?

I saw your designs in the e-mail.
They are good. I am impressed.

-I have appointed you as an architect.
-Thank you, sir.

-Stop it.
-What, sir?

Stop staring at my face.
And sign your appointment letter.

Okay. Sir, one more thing.

By when will I get the apartment
which the company is going to allot?

-Forget it.
-No, sir. I can't forget that.

Forget your worry.

When the previous architect leaves...
you will get the apartment.

It will take around 10-15 days.

Excellent, sir.
Thank you very much, sir.

-Leave.
-What, sir?

My hand.

In the end
so many people perished in love.

Hearts broke, houses were ruined...
wounds were inflicted in love.

Why don't we too perish a bit
and experience the joy of love?

Meet you again in the next episode.

Until then,
bid adieu to your friend Romeo.

Take care. Goodnight. Bye.

Cut it. Okay.

Very good. Very good.

Ms. Kareena is my choice.
She is a fabulous writer.

Fantastic. You gave life to my words.

-Come here and change the battery.
-Yes.

-Rascal.
-I think he is calling you.

-Your hair.
-Yes. I tried a new style today...

I won't spare you. Rascal.

You can't fool me. I won't spare you.

Hang on.

Rascal.

Chang special pudding is ready.

But it's not completely ready.

We will bake it in the microwave.

And then we will eat it together.

Chang special pudding is ready.

But it's not completely ready.

We will bake it in the microwave.

And then we will eat it together.

But it's not completely ready.

We will bake it in the microwave.

And then we will eat it together.

-Hey.
-Stop.

-Now go.
-Okay.

Father, cool. Cool.

Okay.

I am cool.

This is the last warning.

If Ballu Singh doesn't
sell the restaurant

and give me my share of money...
I will...

-Sister.
-Karishma.

Beautiful.

Sister.

Sister, who is he?
What was he doing with the knife?

Sister, what's going on?

Who is she? Is she the new maid?

-Hey!
-Does he stutter?

-Yes.
-You are scaring sister with the knife.

This is our personal matter.

Chandu, you know that I like maids, right?

-Yes.
-Maid?

Come, I will finish
you. Come. Come up.

I think she works only upstairs.

-Can I kiss you?
-Bad manners.

Didn't you learn anything in school?

-I didn't go to school.
-Ladies first. First me. Okay?

Okay, princess.

-Turn your face.
-My God, current.

Stand straight. Very good.

-Shall I close my eyes?
-Yes.

Now say, hail Lord Bajrangbali.

Ronnie is my younger brother.
Forget it.

Karishma, I am grateful to you.

You helped Sweety.

-Really, I am very happy.
-No, I...

No. In today's world,
kin is not kin.

You took the trouble for me. Thanks a lot.

-But there is a problem.
-What?

Now, you people can't live here
as the paying guests. Sorry.

Mr. Ballu.

Because now,
you people are our family members.

You all are our kin.

So sweet! It means,
now we won't have to pay the rent?

No, you didn't understand.

Family members who pay the rent.

Understood?

What happened?

-Who cooked this?
-Karishma. Why?

I think I have tasted this before.

Sister-in-law, I will just come.

Shall I also come?

Do you know Bhavesh?

-Who is Bhavesh?
-The chef.

I don't know any Bhavesh.
Who is Bhavesh?

He is a rogue, useless and a lazy man.

-He was the chef in my restaurant.
-Sister-in-law.

Mr. Ballu, his name sounds so cheap.

Hear his name. Bhavesh. Oh, my God.

-I feel weird when I hear it.
-How dare...

What?

-Where?
-What?

Where is that adorable Bhavesh?

Not adorable, he is an idiot.
I fired him.

I always used to tell him...

that customers are tired
of eating the same kind of food.

So, cook something new.
Do an experiment.

No, he didn't like to work.

-I fired him.
-You did the right thing.

But today, after
eating your tasty food

I felt if that useless chef Bhavesh

had cooked such delicious food
in my restaurant

then my restaurant would
have touched great heights.

-Hell.
-What?

Karishma means to say,
"May Bhavesh rot in hell."

May he rot! May he die a terrible death!
What do I care?

May he suffer from cancer, paralysis
and AIDS.

Eat this. Eat it.

You like it, don't you? Eat it.

Parikshit! Karishma! Kareena!

-What are you doing?
-We're playing, care to join us?

This ball is not for playing.

It is meant for playing.

Where's Pari? Pari!

What's the problem?

Look at what they're up to.
What if someone sees them?

No one is around.

Mr. Ballu and Sweety are out.

Do you think I would've
let them play otherwise?

-Where have they gone?
-He thinks he's the boss here.

-Where have they?
-At the airport to receive someone.

Quit worrying. Catch this.

-Listen.
-Yes?

-Good news.
-Tell me.

I got the job.

Yes! And I also got a house.

In a few days,
I will get the allotment too.

Yes! Yes!

Congratulations!

So, these are your paying guests
whom you were praising all the way.

Yes, Kalpana.
Let me introduce you to them.

-He's Parikshit.
-Hi.

-And his wife, Karishma.
-Hi.

-And he's Jayesh, and his wife Kareena.
-Hi.

Cheater, liar, fraud! You rascal!

-Who?
-Tommy!

-Who's Tommy?
-My dog.

What reminded you of your dog?

Someone here did.

I loved and trusted him so much.

And look what he turned out to be!

What did he turn out to be?

A deceitful idiot.

He hurt my feelings and emotions.

I'm sure that dog must
be helpless.

There wasn't any helplessness.
Cheater. He's a cheater.

He'll rot in hell!

-How dare you?
-Arpita.

I am really sorry.

My friend is slightly sentimental.

Actually, she's slightly senti
and more mental.

No. Actually, she came with me from India
so she must be tired.

-Okay. Now, everyone tell me, who is she?
-Yes.

Let me answer.

Your younger sister, Kalpana.

Karishma, how do you know?

You showed me your family album.

You gave me such detailed information
about each of your relatives.

So, now, I can spot your
relatives in any crowd.

I am very happy to meet all of you.

Isn't it? Well, so am I.

Excuse me, no pulling. We are women.

Actually, my friend is very upset.

-I'll go see her.
-Of course.

-Shall I come along?
-No. no.

We'll go and settle our new ghost.

-Ghost?
-Guest.

Are you enjoying?

Leave me.

-Hello.
-She's the one.

What's wrong with you?

-Checkmate.
-No, soul mate.

Soul mate, she's the one.

She has all the qualities
which my life-partner should have.

I want to cook a new recipe of love
with her everyday for my entire life.

Excuse me, you'll make the recipe
but we'll land in the fire.

-Forget it.
-Arpita, listen to me.

What can you say? It was my mistake.

I thought you were
not like all men.

But you turned out to be one of them.

It was my decency that
I didn't reveal your secret.

You've become so blind,
that you didn't see anything.

Me?

Arpita, I love you.
Arpita, listen to me.

Arpita.

And tell me everything
from the beginning.

Where did you meet?
How did you meet?

Who said ''I love you'' first?
The first date.

Marriage. I want to know everything.

It was a romantic
and pleasant evening.

Oh, Sister-in-law, how romantic.

I was sitting beside
my dying mother.

The doctor said
if I don't get the medicine

then my mother would die.

I ran towards the medical store
but on the way, the goons...

-Goons!
-Oh, my God.

Four huge goons!
And they surrounded me.

And that's when he arrived.

-Parikshit?
-Yes.

-Yes, Parikshit came and...
-He thrashed the goons!

No, Parikshit didn't thrash the goons.

Instead, the goons thrashed Parikshit.

And then they left.

-And didn't Parikshit do anything?
-He did.

-What?
-He challenged the goons.

He said, "Come one by one,

-I'll teach everyone a lesson!"
-Then?

Then the goons thrashed Parikshit
one by one.

-And fled.
-The goons?

-No, Parikshit fled.
-He fled leaving you alone.

No, I wasn't alone...
the goons were there with me.

But unfortunately...
it was too late by then.

My mother was no more.

Oh, Sister-in-law.
I am so sorry, Sister-in-law.

No, I mean she wasn't at home
anymore.

-The neighbours took her to the hospital.
-Okay.

Joking. Come, sit.

Who is it?

Who is flashing the light in my eyes
and wants to die?

Stop. Discussion finished.
It's time for action.

Murli.

Even the God of Death
cannot swindle Murli's money.

You are just a roadside goon.

Just watch, I'll shoot you
and you'll never realise

where it hits and
where it comes out from.

No, Murli sir, don't do that please.

What's wrong with you?

Did I say something to you?

-I was talking on the phone.
-Saved.

But sir, I would've
repaid your money long back

if Ballu Singh's cronies
wouldn't have interfered.

They are such amazing women.

-They punched Ronnie so hard.
-Quiet.

I kept quiet because they were women.

Otherwise, you know my power, right?

Have you seen a laughing neck?

Once a line is drawn on the neck
with this, it starts laughing.

In two pieces.

No, no. Please.

Disconnect the call
and arrange for the money.

He's talking on the phone.
He's talking on the phone.

Thank God. Thank God.

Three days, only three days.

You won't see me for three days.

If I get the money...
everything will be fine.

Otherwise, no one will see you.

He's talking on the phone.
He's talking on the phone.

Thank God.

He's talking to us.
He's talking to us.

Money. Quickly.

Hey, stop shaking.

-Has that dreadful man left?
-Yes, he left.

Those paying guests have
created all these problems.

I'll have to show those
paying guests my power.

Hello, Namaste India.

Hello, Mr. Ballu Singh.
This is Ronnie speaking.

Why are you speaking?
Don't you get tired of speaking?

I know what you'll say.

You warned me to sell
the hotel within a week.

And the time's over now.

And now, you want to warn me
and give me more time.

-Look--
-Shut up!

I know, you'll talk
about my paying guests now.

You'll threaten me that
I should go and warn them

not to interfere between us.

Listen.
They are not just my paying guests

they are my family members.

They are my younger brothers.
Get that.

They treat me like an elder brother,
respect me.

If you say anything against them

I'll forget that we share any relation.

Get that. Disconnect the phone.

You fool, aren't you ashamed?
Disconnect the phone.

-Mr. Ballu.
-What's wrong with your voice, idiot?

-It's me, Sweety.
-Sweety, forgive me.

I thought it's that useless fellow.
Yes, tell me.

We've received an invitation,
for four play.

What?

-Four play. We've have been invited.
-For foreplay?

-Yes.
-Who has invited us?

The drama company, Mr. Ballu.

The theater near our house

is hosting four different
plays together. Four play.

You mean four plays, four dramas.

It's the same thing.

But Mr. Ballu, out of those four
I want to see only one.

Mughal-E-Azam.

So, come home early tomorrow.

Because the first one starts
at 5 o'clock.

And you know, Mr. Ballu...
if you miss the start of the four play,

then you don't enjoy the climax.

It's okay.
You know I am very punctual.

I'll be there on time.

Just tell me where I have to come?

I still remember...
The most romantic evening of my life.

-Wow.
-I was tying the sacred thread.

-What?
-To my cousin brother.

And then Parikshit arrived and said

"Let's go to a romantic place."

-Where are you going?
-I'm here.

-And then, he took my hand and said...
-What?

-Sister,
-What?

Brother, or father, I don't
have anyone except for you.

I am absolutely alone.

So, can't we become
each other's companions?

-Then?
-Then what?

I can still feel the shiver
of his hands.

-I can still feel his breath on my face.
-What?

-I still do.
-Okay.

His fragrance can still be felt
in my breath.

-Then?
-Then what...

Our experiences were
entangled together.

-All differences were done away with.
-Yes.

-And all that was left was porridge!
-Porridge?

Sorry, I got too emotional.

Sister-in-law, you are very mischievous.

You still haven't seen much.

Enough about me.

-Tell me. How does he look?
-Who?

-Your boyfriend.
-I don't have any boyfriend.

Wow. Now don't tell me. Liar.

Tell me, how does he look?

And the boy should have qualities
that I like as well.

Like? Tell me.

And he should talk poetically.

And if he comes in a cowboy costume
then I will just...

-You mean...
-Yes, absolutely.

If you can't understand the
feelings of a speechless animal

then how can he understand
the feelings of humans?

-Tell me.
-Yes.

You're absolutely right.

Give your sister-in-law a kiss
before going to bed.

Sister-in-law.

-Good night.
-Good night.

-Kalpana.
-Yes.

It's strange, but I feel you will find
your cowboy dream man tomorrow.

-Really?
-Really.

-Sister-in-law.
-Seriously.

-Go, go and sleep.
-Good night.

Good night.

Parag. Parag.

This is it.

Bless you.

My God. Mr. Bhavesh.

Oh, my God, I don't believe my eyes.

Mr. Bhavesh Verma.

-It's a dream come true.
-It's okay, relax.

No relax.

I started my own cookery class
after reading your books.

-Chef.
-Really.

Yes. Sir, autograph please.

Oh, sure. Sure.

-Bless you, bless you.
-Thank you.

Mr. Verma, I didn't know
you were an animal lover.

You see, those who don't love animals

can't even understand
the feelings of humans.

I love animals.

You see, they are not like us.

They are not deceitful or fake.

Whenever I see those
beautiful, colorful birds

soaring in the skies, I wish...

I wish, I could fly
in the sky as well.

You see, they don't
look for a chance to sing.

They don't look for logic to live.

And they don't look
for a reason to be happy.

-But still, we look for them to eat.
-Shut up.

-Excuse me. Excuse me, sorry.
-It's okay.

Looking at their innocence
and their chirping

I wish,
we could learn to love like them.

I love animals.

Excuse me, sir.
What is your favourite recipe?

Of course, of course. Let me think.

Fried pomfret... pork chops...
beef steak... stuffed turkey...

-Roasted duck.
-Duck.

-You are an animal lover.
-Of course.

I meant they should be banned.

I am a pure vegetarian. You see.

I eat vegetables that die
and fall off the tree.

Such a nice thing to say.

Oh, my God, my idol.
My hero, he's a vegetarian!

It's okay, it's okay.

-What are you doing?
-No more meat.

I won't eat meat anymore.

-Now I'll be a vegetarian as well.
-Okay.

-Can I kiss your hands?
-Yes.

Can I suck your fingers?

Great cook. Great cook.

Okay, security, security.

Excuse me. Excuse me.

-Hi.
-Hello.

Kalpana.

Bhavesh. Bhavesh.

-I just heard your conversation.
-Really.

It's great to see that there are people

who really care about birds and animals.

God has given them this right.

And no human has the right to
take away this right from them.

Everyone doesn't think like that.

I don't think like everyone.

-So, you're a chef.
-Yes, a simple one.

Looking at the reaction of your fans...
it doesn't seem so.

Where do you work?

Have you heard about
Hotel Intercontinental?

The manager there
is my friend's husband.

Take a right from there.
Hotel Four Seasons.

On the beach road.

-My friend is a receptionist there.
-Yes.

Take a left from there. Hotel Grand Hyatt.

-Have you ever been there?
-No.

There. I work there as
the supervisor chef.

-Seems like they pay very less.
-What?

-Would you like to have lunch?
-Lunch?

By the way, they pay me
a good salary.

Hi, there's good news for you.

The channel's creative head

just loved your
script-writing style.

He says, this should be
the way to write a script.

In fact, he has said that
if Kareena doesn't give

the next script, then his
job can be in trouble as well.

-Oh.
-So?

-So?
-So, he wants to meet you now, idiot.

Okay.

-But that rascal...
-Papa, cool.

Okay, cool.
Cool.

I am cool, always cool.

-Hey, you...
-Papa.

Did you have any
difficulties on the way?

By the way,
I would suit more on this chair.

Those who wear traditional attire...
don't talk about suits.

Rascal, I am asking you
to get off the chair.

-Then sit on your chair.
-No!

This chair suits you very well.

It suits you.

Be seated. Don't worry about me.
I can sit anywhere. Anywhere.

I've decided that you
should be given a chance.

Like a trial.

I am ready to appoint you
as a temporary writer.

You are Pillai not Reddy,
but no thanks.

-I will take your neck...
-Papa, remember.

-Doctor.
-Cool. Cool.

I'll have your neck checked.

Such a sweet voice and neck.

But making you permanent
is a problem.

Okay, then I'll leave.

You suit, you are well-suited
to become a permanent writer.

-And the three year contract?
-That...

-I'm leaving.
-I have to give it.

I had to give you that. Confirmed.

-And...
-Something else?

Yes. I want to marry
your daughter Seema.

And I want to become the
president of this country.

-What do you mean?
-Get out, rascal. Enough. Go.

I am going, I am going.

-Father, he's really going.
-Let him go.

If I leave, you'll lose your post.

Who told you that?

Seema, you. You too?

-Father, I love him.
-But I don't love him.

-He can't support a family.
-Sir, I will support her.

But you'll have to support
the rest of your family.

Quiet. See that, see that.

Father, please accept. Please.

Okay. You're well-suited.

-What?
-You two are well-suited.

Yes.

-Bye.
-Bye.

-Bye.
-Bye.

-Bye.
-Bye, bye.

Bye, bye.

Bye.

-What are you doing here?
-What are you doing?

-I am seeing her off.
-This is wrong.

Wrong? I have been doing it
this way since I was a child.

How do you do it?

-I don't mean this.
-Then?

I am talking about Kalpana.

We already have so many problems
and now you're adding more problems.

Look, Kalpana is
Mr. Ballu's sister-in-law.

But she is really amazing.

Look, we'll be caught.

You idiot, what are you
doing in my love story?

I was going home from the office.

And I got down from
the bus when I saw you.

Come on, let's board the bus again.

-Where are you going?
-Don't you want to go home?

Like this?
Who'll change the get-up, your father?

-Don't you dare drag my father in this?
-Why?

Because only I can do that.

And anyway, that get-up
will look very strange on him.

-I'm getting a call.
-Hello, yes, Mr. Chow Chow.

I'll go change.

-Clothes.
-Setting.

Sir, don't you worry,
I have seen the designs.

-You've got nice muscles.
-Up or down?

-What do you want?
-Drape.

We want to drape you.

You're such a creepy man.

How could you even think of it?

Hand it over to me,
I'll do it at home.

We want to do it here, not at home.

How can I?

How can I drape a saree and
doll up publically?

Is this an inauguration
of a beauty parlor?

He means "rape," not "drape."

No, I am saying it.

Rape? You will rape me?

She looks happy.

She'll be happier to
see my muscles. Come on.

Come on, take her.

-Come on, let's go. Come on.
-Come on. We'll have fun.

This is the right place.

Leave me. Leave me!

Look, no stranger has
ever touched me.

Is she stopping us
or encouraging us?

Leave me, let me go.

Leave me. Leave me, leave me.

Leave me, let me go.

-How can we...
-No, don't say anything else.

You'll say something,
and it'll sound like something else.

Do you remember what you did last Holi?

He told all the girls of his building...

And it sounded like something else.

You know, they thrashed us so badly.

Didn't you feel ashamed
getting beaten up by women?

Shut up. You dare defame me
in front of a woman.

-Don't you feel ashamed?
-Go outside and keep a watch.

-Until then, I'll deal with her.
-No.

Okay.

-Go.
-Come on.

Leave me, let me go.

-Leave me.
-You don't know my power.

Hey, woman, get ready to celebrate
your night of nuptials with me.

Beware, beware.
Don't you dare touch my chest!

-What?
-I mean, don't touch.

But I can touch your behind.

No, no, no.

I'll lay down my life,
but I'll never sleep with you.

-You'll be useless after you die.
-Quiet.

-You lustful man.
-You besmirched woman!

-You dare hit me.
-Stop!

Sister-in-law. Are you fine?

Sister-in-law, have no fear
because your brother-in-law is here.

Hey, brother-in-law...
your intentions don't seem right.

Hit him!

You were going to rape her?

Save me. Save me.

Rape?

-Save me.
-Hey.

Are you hurt?

Sit here.

-You idiot.
-Hit him, Brother-in-law.

I won't spare you.

I won't spare you!

Brother-in-law...

You were going to rape her?

You were going to rape her?

Sister-in-law, are you fine?

Idiot, if he would have raped me
it would have been better.

-Rape?
-Yes.

Those two goons wanted
to take advantage of me.

We'll deal with him.

Is this how you'll deal with him?

What could we do?
He would have found out.

And if he had found out

then we wouldn't have
been able to face anyone.

Relax, take a chill pill.

You are a man, why are you tensed?

Do I look like a man?

Even my hormones
have started changing.

-Hormones.
-And your brother, Jayesh.

Did Jayesh come there to
save me or beat me up?

I didn't understand.

If he had raped me
it probably would have hurt less.

Forget it, you speak so much.

Anyway, guys, Mr. Ballu and Sweety
shouldn't find out about this.

The matter will
get blown up unnecessarily.

And there will be a problem
which I don't want.

But what about Ronnie?

We won't spare him.

He dare try to tarnish our honor.

-Idiot.
-Fool.

Scoundrel.

You...

-What is it?
-You are eating the apple.

Does it look like a watermelon?

No, actually, I can see
something else in the apple.

-Worm.
-Half.

Yes.

Question. Where is the rest of it?

Answer.
The rest went into his stomach.

Kareena, where's Karishma?

Karishma, Karishma.

Karishma is vomiting.

Parikshit, congratulations!

Thank you. What for?

-Karishma is vomiting.
-So what? We'll get her treated.

Why are you getting so excited?

Kareena,
Parikshit is going to be a father.

-What?
-What?

-Father?
-Father?

-Scum...
-Sister.

-Sister.
-Sister.

-Scum.
-Scum?

I meant, come.
When did you arrive?

I just arrived. Move.

-Come here.
-What happened?

Sit, sit here.

It's such good news, Karishma.

-How do I say it?
-Sister, say it with your mouth.

-It's wonderful news!
-You'll still have to use your mouth.

-Karishma.
-Yes, Sister.

It's wonderful news! Listen to me.

Let go!

-Sister.
-Yes?

These men can never see women happy.

They always keep interfering.

Don't you dare interfere again!
Shut up.

What is it, Sister?

Karishma,

a new guest is arriving in this house.

Wow! New guest, wow!

My God, it really is good news.

Congratulations.

Well, you should congratulate him.

-Him? Why?
-He's the father of the child.

-Him.
-Yes!

-You?
-Yes!

-The father of the child?
-Yes!

You scoundrel!
You wretched man!

Aren't you ashamed?

-You betrayed your own...
-What are you saying, Karishma?

-Sister, just think.
-Yes.

When Mr. Ballu finds out about the child
how would he feel?

What are you saying?

When he hears about the child
he'll dance with joy.

Mr. Ballu will dance
with joy upon hearing

that Parikshit is
the father of your child?

No. This is injustice.
You make the mistake

and a helpless woman like me
has to bear the brunt.

-"Helpless woman!"
-Yes.

You were vomiting, you are pregnant.

-What?
-Yes.

-Pregnant.
-Yes.

-Me... me... me...
-Yes, you.

You're pregnant like every
normal woman in the world.

Now, relax. Parikshit, look after her.

Until then, I'll inform
the entire neighbourhood.

-Sister...
-No, no.

-Sister!
-Sister!

Why am I talking like this?

"Helpless!"
You've got yourself in a fix now.

"It's wonderful news!
It's wonderful news!"

Go vomit.

I didn't know that she'd
misinterpret my vomiting.

Why is this happening with me?
Why is everyone after me?

Someone wants to rape me
and someone is declaring me pregnant.

Listen, let's go and tell sister

that I am not pregnant.
It's because of the worm in the apple.

-Go and tell her right now.
-Hold on...

Jayesh, now, it's your turn.

Wow, it's really wonderful.

Sweety gave me such good news.

You made me really happy.

Congratulations.

-Congratulations.
-Listen, Mr. Ballu.

You don't have to worry about anything.
Karishma is our responsibility now.

We'll take care of everything.

-Mr. Ballu, listen to me.
-We'll look after her every minute.

Don't worry about the money.

Your elder brother is here to support you.

Mr. Ballu...
Tell him.

Mr. Ballu, listen to us.

-Mr. Ballu, let's go.
-Let's go.

-Yes.
-Where do we have to go?

You forgot, didn't you?

We've have to go to the Gurudwara
and pray for Karishma's child.

-You have to observe a fast.
-Yes, I remember.

It's a wonderful day today.

Lord has blessed us with his grace.

You know, Kalpana said
that she has chosen her life partner.

And then I was told that

soon a small child will be
arriving in this house.

But Mr. Ballu...

We could never become parents.

For years, this house remained lonely.

We could never imagine

that we'll hear the giggling
of a child in this house.

God is so magnanimous.

He sent you here
and fulfilled my desire.

Come on Mr. Ballu, after the Gurudwara

-we've to go for wife-swapping.
-What?

She means wife's shopping.

-It means the same.
-It doesn't!

Come on, we're leaving.

-Bye.
-Bye.

We're going to hell for this.

-Hi, Parikshit.
-Hi, Sister Sweety. Good morning.

Good morning.
There's someone here to meet you.

-Me?
-Yes, look.

I thought why don't we go to
the office together.

It's good.
I was on my way to the office.

Let's go, come on.

Let's go, please.

-How do I look?
-Different.

-Shall we go?
-Just different?

Beautifully, different.
Nice, isn't it?

-Come on, let's go.
-What is this, Parikshit?

Your friend has come home
for the first time,

won't you introduce her to Karishma?

-Who's Karishma?
-Karishma, doesn't matter. Come on.

Hi, everyone.

-Good morning, Sister.
-Good morning, Jayesh.

It seems, I've never seen you before.

-You are?
-Aarti.

-I am Jayesh, Pari's cousin.
-Nice to meet you.

Same here.

Pari, did you
introduce her to Karishma?

Why are you all so adamant
about introducing her to Karishma?

Come on, please.

When everyone is insisting so much
then introduce me to Karishma.

By the way, who is this Karishma?

-Maid.
-Maid?

Maid?

Maid?

Bye. Bye-bye.

I was just saying bye to them.

-Please, come on.
-Bye.

Listen. What about my bye?

She's Karishma.

-Greetings.
-Greetings.

Mrs. Karishma Pandey.
Parikshit's wife.

Aarti, congratulate them.

She's expanding.

She's pregnant.
She's going to be a mother.

It wasn't planned.

-And the father.
-Guess who?

Parikshit.

Pari, be back soon.

I feel very scared these days.

You...
You'll definitely go to hell.

I didn't want to hurt you.

Actually, we got married suddenly

that I couldn't invite you.

Okay, I'll give you a special treat
tomorrow, for my marriage.

Okay, when I have a daughter

I'll give you the first invitation
for her first birthday.

Aren't you happy that I am married?

You don't like my wife, Karishma?

You are not happy.

And you can never be.

Because you love me.

And I am not asking you this...
I am telling you.

Because love is something
that you can't hide.

These drenched eyes...
sulking face... broken heart...

You can't hide them.

And the one you saw was
my friend Bhavesh Verma.

He's a guy, a boy.

He's been acting as
my wife for many days now.

But there's nothing else
that we could have done.

We had no other option.
We were helpless.

Look, Arpita,
if you still think I cheated you, then...

-Do you have a handkerchief?
-Yes.

-How many?
-One. But why?

One handkerchief won't be sufficient.

-I feel like crying a lot.
-No.

I doubted my Tommy. Sorry. I doubted you.

It's okay.

That means, you are Karishma.

-And he's...
-Kareena.

I can't believe that
I couldn't recognise you.

I don't know whether my get-up
was nice or was it my fate?

But that is what has happened.

We've decided that we'll tell Mr. Ballu
and Sweety everything today.

Yes. And they can punish us
in any way they wish to.

But we can't play
with their emotions.

Come on, let's tell Mr. Ballu
and sister Sweety everything.

Hang on, guys, hang on.

You can hurt them directly like this.

You'll have to tell them
that whatever you did

was your helplessness
and not your will.

But we will have to tell them.

-How do we tell them?
-Do something about it.

Come up with a story, take someone's name
and tell them a story.

Do anything,
but just don't hurt them.

You are right.

First, we'll need to
show them a small trailer

and then the entire film.

-Come on.
-Hey,

aren't you going to change
your get-up?

Go change.

These women turned out to be men.

I'll take care of them right away.

You got naked publicly.
Is this how you change clothes?

Yes. I didn't know that
the lift was transparent.

Transparent. Come on.
You're always doing strange things.

Hello, Ronnie.

Let's go.

Ronnie.

So, he's Ronnie.

-You punched him, didn't you?
-Yes.

But he doesn't reform.
I will have to hit him again.

Yes. This is like inviting people
to hit them. Some people are so stubborn.

I guess he was born naked.

Why do you laugh?

I'll make small, small, small...

tiny pieces of you,
and make minced-meat out of you.

Mr. Ballu and Sweety
are not alone now, get that.

Yes. We are together.

And together,
we'll teach you a lesson.

-Why do you...
-What are you doing?

-You dare raise your hands on a woman.
-Yes.

Don't you feel ashamed?

-You are a man, so, fight with a man.
-Yes, go on.

He's a man too.

No, she has such beautiful tresses.

Oh God, Karishma.

Karishma, when did you get this done?

-When did you... Why?
-Why?

Pretending to be innocent.

Madonna's wig is in my hand.

Oh, my God, what has...

Take a look.

This is the truth about
your lovable paying guests.

Mr. Ballu Singh, they are all frauds.

They were going to make a fool of you
and plunder the entire house.

Mr. Ballu, trust me, please.

We were going to tell you the truth.

We gave you a place in our hearts

and not just in this house.
My heart.

I loved you more than
my younger brothers.

What did you get?

What did you get by doing this?

What did you get by
mocking my emotions?

You played with our emotions
just for the sake of your own interest.

You should have felt ashamed.

You should have been
afraid of the Lord.

You must have thought that they
are emotional fools, they're stupid.

Let's please him with fake emotions
and pillage him.

You mocked my love.

It's wrong. It's wrong.

-Sister, please try to understand...
-Stop it.

I don't want to hear
this word from you.

Yes, brother, kin will always be kin
and strangers will always be strangers.

And they are a good examples of it.

Hey, you.

Yes.

Enough of your family drama.

Here's the paper, get it signed.

-Here.
-What is it?

Brother, it's the restaurant papers.

Can't you do such a small thing
for your younger brother?

-Come on, sign the papers.
-Okay.

No, Mr. Ballu.

This entire problem is
because of my restaurant.

-Tell me where I have to sign.
-Here.

Mr. Mr. Mr. Ballu, please,
please, listen to us.

You can punish us
in any way you want.

But please don't do this.

Mr. Ballu, this restaurant
belongs to your father.

And you told us that he
built it with such hard work.

Please, don't give it
to these goons.

-Who did you call a goon?
-Sorry.

-You goon...
-Idiot, fool.

-You moron, idiot.
-You idiot. Rotten egg.

-I am done.
-Shut up!

-Run.
-Where?

Hey. Not you. Us.

Run.

Why are you looking at me?

Get them!

Yes, Mr. Chhabria, don't worry.

I know you've invested a
large amount in this show.

I promise you.

No, don't worry. I know this
is my first and the last chance.

It will be a big hit.

Salim. Do you know
who you are talking to?

I know who I am talking to.

I am talking to an arrogant father

who is trying to suppress me and is
using the powers

-of an emperor, but in vain.
-Salim!

Your loud voice cannot
make me change my mind.

Your reign, your Mughal orders

can change the fate of people.

But they cannot suppress love.

Either, you'll write the saga
of our defeat with our blood

or our love will be
victorious once again.

Only the masses of India have the right
to decide the fate of India.

And not the love of
some ordinary dancer

that sways for a few silver coins.

Salim, swords write the sagas of war.

They don't decide the
fate of love or the country.

Summon Anarkali.

Anarkali!

The director has
changed Anarkali again.

-What are you saying?
-Yes.

-Help.
-Quiet, insolent servant.

Come to your senses...
you are in the presence of the emperor.

Accept your crimes.

-Do you love, Salim?
-No. I love Jayesh.

What are you saying, Anarkali?

-Who is Jayesh?
-Continue.

I am the king of Lanka, Jayesh.

I mean, the king of Lanka, Naresh.

No one can stop Anarkali and Ravan.

Someone can.

Someone can surely stop you.

Anarkali, give me
the restaurant papers.

Give me the papers.

-Stop.
-Everyone is standing in their place.

I am taking your name.

-Why are you defaming me?
-Samba.

Samba!

Ravan, darling.

-Heads up.
-Samba.

One man and ten heads.
It's great injustice.

Chief, it must be very difficult
for him to go to discos as well.

-Why?
-2000 rupees per head.

He has ten heads.

Give me the papers.

Have no fear, because
Spidey's here. Spiderman.

-Who is he?
-Until I am alive

no one can touch my friend, Ravan.

-Salim.
-What is this Salim, all the while?

Anarkali, let's go from here.

The situation here
has become very bad.

Stop.

No one will go out of here.
Only these papers will go out of here.

Do these papers belong to you?

You idiot.

-These papers are mine.
-Mine.

-Mine.
-Mine.

-Whose?
-Yours.

She's mopping the floor.

Mughal maid.

You know I like maids.

Maid.

The name is Jaan. Umrao Jaan.

Where are your ears?

I think she wants to tell me
a secret in my ears.

Run.

I am not Jignesh Shah.
Nor Kalpesh Shah.

I am not Ritesh Shah.
Nor Nasiruddin Shah.

-Then you must be Satish Shah.
-No.

Who is he?

By relation, I am your father.

And my name is Shahenshah.

Another one?
That means I have two fathers.

-Mother betrayed me.
-Me too.

-Who are you?
-Osama.

Who is Osama?

I suggest you give him your address

he'll send two planes
and answer your questions.

-That Osama. Greetings, Brother.
-Greetings. Whoever you are.

Enough of your drama.

Ronnie, take the papers
and come here.

Osama!

Who is it now?

Didn't you get an idea
from the camera treatment?

It's definitely a TV serial character.

-Who are you?
-Tulsi.

-Where are you from?
-From the famous soap opera, of course.

And why did you come
to the royal court?

Osama, give me the papers.

I'll shoot you!

Why do you interfere
in such trivial issues?

By killing her...
you'll become a serial killer.

It's of no use, Osama. She'll not die.

She's been like this for
the last 5000 episodes.

I have not come alone.
I've brought grandma's old boyfriend.

I've brought your permanent enemy along.

-Gabbar.
-When did Thakur become a Sikh?

This is too much. Too much.

-He's Mr. Ballu Singh.
-Mr. Ballu Singh?

You're right.

Return the restaurant papers
to me, Gabbar.

If you wanted the
restaurant papers

then why sign them
in the first place?

Because I got emotional.

But I've realised my mistake.

And I've realised who's on my side,
and who's not.

What is your name?
Osama?

Give me the papers.

-And all of you, come with me.
-What are you saying?

This is not a stroll in the park!

Can't you see this gun?

Don't move!

-Who are you, madam?
-Goddess of flowers.

-Goddess of flowers?
-Phoolan Devi.

-It's the same thing, Mr. Ballu.
-They don't know.

Quickly, give me your gun
and the restaurant papers.

Hey, Phoolan, what's the hurry?

First deal with Rana.

Give me that gun and those papers.

Sister Sweety...
Don't give them the papers.

I am here.

Give them the papers.

What can I do? Give it.

I told you to give the papers to them.
Hand them over.

-You stutterer!
-You don't know my power.

Why do you always talk about your power?
Tell me your power.

Right eye, minus 2.5.
Left eye, minus 5.

Mr. Ballu, we were absolutely helpless.

Won't you ever forgive us? Sister?

We did lie to you.

But our bond with you was not fake.

Believe us.

While we lived in this house
we considered it our own

and you, as our family.

Mr. Ballu, what we did was wrong.
But we are not bad people.

-Mr. Ballu...
-Sweety, they are all fools. All of them.

Okay, I'll forgive you
on one condition.

What?

You promised us a little guest.

You'll have to bring it here.

No, Mr. Ballu, it's not possible.

Why?

I can never be a mother.

But you can become a father.

-Of course.
-Of course.

Won't your children
be our children as well?

Yes.

Great!

Hey, stop.

Don't you want to get married first?

Mr. Ballu, we thought,
until we get married

why don't we fulfill
your wish of having a child.

Hey, wait!