Paulie Go! (2022) - full transcript

Paulie, eat dirt or
get punched in the stomach?

How about I do neither Tony?

Eat.

Go on.

When I was 9
years old, I elected to forgo friendships

and instead dedicate my life to
becoming one

of the greatest thinkers
of the 21st century,

a scientist worthy of acceptance

to the Shikenjanski Lab
for Artificial Intelligence.

Even as a child, I knew that
if I worked tirelessly,

I was capable
of developing the type



of ground-breaking technology
you are about to see today.

Ladies and gentlemen,
this is a Shikenjanski Bot

named after
Professor Chuck Shikenjanski.

I'll just show you.

Most AI is set up to follow
simple commands.

Janski, spin around.

But my technology only obeys
commands that are

in its best interest.

Janski, drive forward 3 feet.

It only drove like a foot

Because jumping off the desk
wouldn't be

in the bot's best interest.

Did I say you could come
in here?

What if jumping off the desk
was really fun?



Wouldn't that be
in the bot's best interest?

This is why I'm going to college
a year early.

Nobody here understands
what it takes

to become an important person.

You don't know how to be
a person, period.

Your mom has your letter,
by the way.

What letter?

From Professor Shiken-whatever.

What?

It feels thick.

It's a good sign, right?

What does it say, Paulie?

Computer
Science Department, this is Cathy.

There's been
a mistake on an application decision,

I need Professor Shikenjanski's
cellphone number.

I'm sorry,
we don't give out phone numbers

for faculty.

Computer Science Department,
this is Cathy.

What is
Chuck Shikenjanski's home address?

I'm not at
liberty to share that information.

Why don't you just email
Shikenjanski's office?

I did.

They were even less helpful
than you.

No, I didn't mean it like that.

Don't hang up, please.

I need to connect
with Professor Shikenjanski.

It's a matter of life and...

Shikenjanski's
contact information is private.

Please.

This means everything to me.

Look, all I can tell you is that

he has a P.O. box
in northern Minnesota.

Morning, boys.

Can I get you something?

Apple fritter
and a cup of coffee?

Sorry, kid got the last fritter.

He's been staring at those
mailboxes for hours.

Why?

Don't know.

I didn't want to bother him.

Hey, kid, what you doing?

Waiting.

For what?

You got a date?

Is that why
you're so dressed up?

I'm waiting for a colleague.

You probably don't know him.

What's his name?

Professor Chuck Shikenjanski.

Oh, he's handsome.

Gee, how do I know that guy?

Because we met him
10 minutes ago at the bait shop.

What?

He was wearing a turtleneck.

Yeah, right.

Yeah.

Your shirt was this guy?

Where's the bait shop?

The other end of downtown.

All you have to do is... oh.

Yeah, he just got here.

He's moving pretty good.

Oh!

Oh, what the hell?

Uh, what is this?

It's a leech.

This man, where is he?

Yeah,
he's right here yelling at me.

He's got a big, fat leech
on his neck.

This man, where did he go?

Please.

You gonna pick that up?

Okay, yeah, I'll tell him.

Uh, Betty says your friend
is getting something

from one of the P.O. boxes
up the street.

Son, I'm gonna need you
to come with me.

I have to go right now.

My life is on the line.

Well, you're not going anywhere
in this stolen van.

If I don't find
Professor Shikenjanski,

there will be profound
ramifications on the future

of American innovation.

We could easily wake up 10 years
from now to find that Sweden

has supplanted the U.S.

as the global superpower
in autonomous robotics.

Do you really want that
on your conscience?

Okay, kid, you can come in now?

Sir, if I don't find
Professor Shikenjanski

in the next...

Yeah, I know, I know.

My door was open.

Sit down.

You know, you could have made
both of our lives

a lot easier by telling me
you took your uncle's van

without asking.

He never drives it.

He just leaves it
in a parking lot

and calls it, "advertising".

Don't tell me.

Tell him.

And it's a lot easier
to fly here from California

than it is to drive.

It's probably cheaper, too,
just so you know.

Hello.

Mr. Go, hi.

This is Sheriff Anderson
from Hubbard County, Minnesota.

We spoke earlier.

Is Paulie with you now?

Paulie is right here next to
me. Yes.

Paulie?

Yes.

I'm sorry.

You're in big trouble, Paulie.

Mr. Go, am I correct to assume
that you will not be

pressing charges
against your nephew?

No.

No charges.

Okay, great.

His
father died when he was young.

He doesn't know how to be a man.

I'm sorry to hear that.

He's very smart,

but he's always been small
for his age

and he has no friends at school.

Well, I guess
that's case closed.

You know, I actually deal with
a fair amount

of inter family auto theft,

although usually
it's after a divorce.

Yeah.

Hey, Sheriff.

Brandon, uh,
could you bring back the van

from this morning?

The van with the Chinese riding?

It's Filipino,
but yes, that one.

Jason.

We gotta bring the Chinese van
back to town.

I just unhooked it.

So hook it back up.

Brandan, what's going on
over there?

Uh-huh.

The bumper.

Yeah, well, just...

Keep me posted, okay?

You ever tried Walleye, Paulie?

That is a 40-pound muskie.

It looks like the statue
in town.

Close.

The one in town
is a tiger muskie.

Did you catch this one?

I caught it.

With a leech.

It's true.

We were fishing a few bays away,

which is wild in itself,

because we're not even
on a muskie lake,

and Avery had
this crummy second-hand rod.

Oh, uh, Avery, Polly.
Polly, Avery.

We ran into each other earlier.

Oh, great.

So anyway,
when that fish hit Avery's line,

I had no idea how big it was,
because she wouldn't hand me

the rod.

She wanted to do
the whole thing herself.

8 years old.

You must have fought that thing
for what, 20 minutes?

35.

Well, long enough, that one
of her hands started bleeding.

It's not every day my dad
brings home a hungry criminal

for dinner.

We
Just had a little miscommunication

down at the station.

I told Paulie he could crash up
in the loft

and uh, pick up his van
in the morning

and head on back to California.

No more manhunt?

It's not a manhunt.

I just need to connect
with a colleague

who lives off the grid.

You already work
with the professor?

Not yet.

Paulie's graduating
from high school a year early.

Yeah, Avery's going to Duluth
in the fall.

Why don't you just wait
till you're on campus

to introduce yourself
to the professor?

How much do you know
about the progress

of deep learning algorithms
and humanoid robots?

As much as you know about
table manners.

Hey.

Sorry.

So you got into school
a year early.

I would have,
if the admissions people

knew anything about
artificial intelligence.

You got rejected?

I could reposition
European space satellites

if I wanted to.

You know,
Avery actually knows quite a bit

about technology herself.

Dad.

What? You do.

She makes videos
on the internet.

Videos?

Yeah.

Fishing videos,
ton of people watch 'em.

Why?

Dad, put it away.

I'll just show him one.

Whatever.

Look at this.

Okay, guys, nearly got him.

I'm pretty sure it's a Walleye.

Notice how I didn't just start
pumping my rod

when I felt him strike.

Unlike northerns,
Walleye don't slash at bait,

they inhale it.

So if you pull back too quick,
you could pull the bait

clean out of the fish's mouth.

She really is a great angler.

I mean,
that video has like 5,000 views.

She's not usually rude
like that.

Her boyfriend just broke up
with her, and...

And he's a total burnout,

but they spent a lot
of time together.

She doesn't have a lot
of close friends, you know?

She's more like independent,
self-sufficient.

And scary.

Hmm?

What's happening on Spider Lake?

Nothing.

You can't just spy on people.

'Cause that's your thing.

What do you want?

Why would an artificial
intelligence professor hide out

in northern Minnesota?

He doesn't wanna be found.

How did you find him?

I built an algorithm to bypass
the firewalls

in the school's
human resource department,

so another bot could process
the information related

to Professor Shikenjanski's
whereabouts.

That can't be legal.

Please leave me alone.

I'm just giving you shit.

Come outside.

No.

You coming?

You need my help.

What do you mean?

Which Spider Lake is he on?

Minnesota has over 10,000 lakes,
common names like Big Lake,

Bass Lake or Spider Lake
are used multiple times.

How many?

2.10.

Let's say you do pick
the right lake.

How are you gonna find
this guy's place?

You can't see anything
from the road.

Do you have a boat?

Are you gonna kill him?

This isn't a joke to me.

It's the only thing
I care about.

If Professor Shikenjanski
doesn't get me into his lab,

my life won't matter.

Okay, I get it.

No, you don't.

Evan Ehrenberg was
a PhD candidate by 16.

Rifath Sharook was already
designing satellites.

You probably have no idea who
either of those people are.

And I don't care.

But the hacking thing you did,

could you do it to YouTube
or Instagram?

Could you make it
to where certain videos

are featured more frequently
than they normally would be?

Certain fishing videos?

Could you manipulate the code
or whatever to make sure

my videos pop up
more frequently?

Obviously.

Then I'll make you a deal.

I'll take you around the lake,
so you can stalk your professor

if you promise to boost
my videos.

But if you suddenly jump
from 5,000 views...

I have a lot more
than 5,000 views.

The video your dad showed me...

Is super old and isn't even
on my main channel.

Are you in or not?

Some of these lakes
have over 50 miles of shoreline.

They have hidden bays,
and islands,

and unmarked streams.

Without my boat, you'll never...

Fine.

I'll do it.

Great.

Woah!

It's for the leeches.

Here's how this is gonna go.

My dad thinks I'm camping with
my friends this weekend,

so I'll be out of the house
by the time you wake up.

When you get in the car,
he'll tell you his

"I saw Prince
jam with Janet Jackson

in 1996" story.

It's super long
and he won't have time

to ask you any questions.

When you pick up
your kidnapper van,

Brandon will probably tell you
about the one time

he took me fishing.

Right?

I'm bringing it back.

I'm bringing it back.

Ah, I caught it.

Don't believe his version.

I had to reel in his fish
after he dropped his cellphone

in the water and started crying.

Drive 35 miles to Motley.

There's a store there called,
"Moe's".

Buy yourself a couple outfits,
so you can blend in.

Leave your van
in the parking lot

and I'll pick you up.

We'll start with the closest
Spider Lake

and work our way out from there.

Look at you, townie!

Let's get going.

There are three properties that
would fit the needs

of Professor Shikenjanski.

No close neighbors,

a building big enough
for a robotics lab,

and a clearing large enough to
land a helicopter.

Why would he need to land
a helicopter?

Because some
of his equipment is...

It'll take too much time
to explain.

There.

That's it.

Where?
I don't see anything.

That's the point.

The satellite photos show
a clearing

and a large structure up
over that hill.

Let's go.

Grab it.

Stay here.

Watch out for booby traps.

Hello.

It's not him.

What was that girlish shriek,
I heard?

I don't know.

I heard it, too.

Let's go.

Go that way.

What are you doing?

It'll take too
much time to explain.

This is the wrong lot.

Good morning.

Nice day for a cruise.

It's perfect.

Hey, do you know who lives
in that big cabin,

couple lots down?

It's for sale.

She always drive?

I do other things.

It's why I keep him around.

Have you ever seen this guy?

No, I'd remember that guy.

What about that lot
out on that point?

Couple bought it last year.

They're Unitarians.

What does that mean?

It means they hug too much
in church.

Does anyone around here drive
a red Chevy Volt?

Not on purpose?

Okay.

Thanks for your help.

No problem.

Enjoy your youth
while you got it, kids,

getting old sucks.

Here's what I don't get.

You're racing to go to college,
but all the big tech guys

dropped out.

You can't drop out of college
if you don't go to college.

I'm not going to college.

You're not?

I thought...

You don't learn
anything important in college.

My dad doesn't know yet.

I wouldn't care about college
at all

if it weren't for
Professor Shikenjanski.

What's he do that's so cool?

Do you really wanna know
or are you just gonna make

fun of me?

I wanna know.

Professor Shikenjanski
is teaching robots

to have relationships by signing
quantitative value

to emotional interaction.

Why does he need you?

Because I
developed a compounding

conclusion algorithm
for intuition learning

that could ultimately boost
emotional capacity

by at least 36 percent.

So you're a relationship expert?

Here we go.

Is it big?

Oh, yeah.

In a sec, I'm gonna hand you
the pole.

No, why?

So I could take off my shirt.

What?

First time I did a video
in my bathing suit,

I went
from 100 to 100,000 views.

They don't all get that much,
but it's a lot more

than the videos
on my personal channel.

Does your dad know?

No, don't be stupid.

Hold it steady, don't let up.

All right, you guys,
got one on the line.

This could be our muskie.

Fish of 10,000 casts.

Oh God, where is it?

Oh, I... I see some color.

Damn it.

It's a tiger.

See, a lot of people
would be really excited

about this catch,
but here's the problem.

Tiger muskies aren't real fish.

They were created
in a lab by crossbreeding

northerns and muskies
to make it easier

for lazy fishermen to catch
the big one.

Earn your trophies, people!

I'm not about to let this cyborg
into my boat.

Go ahead.

Till next time.

Do you have a girlfriend,
Paulie?

You ever had a girlfriend,
ever kissed a girl?

I have more important things
to do.

In fact, we...
We shouldn't be wasting time.

We need to keep searching.

These bugs are ferocious.

Dude, they're just mosquitoes.

You Avery?

Yep.

Spoke about an hour ago.

What's his deal?

Not a lot of social skills.

Thank you.

Have a good one.

I have social skills.

Why'd you say I don't have
any social skills?

Outside.

I was just joking.

You don't have social skills,
either, you know?

Sure, Paulie,
I have 60,000 followers

and I don't have...

Who like watching
you catch fish in your bathing suit.

At least, I'm teaching
my audience a skill

I actually possess.

I'm gonna be one
of the greatest scientists

of the 21st century.

How can you teach robots to have
meaningful relationships

when you don't have any friends?

You don't have
any friends either.

I have a lot of friends.

Then how come none
of them texted you today

or yesterday?

What have you been like looking
at my phone or something?

Yes.

Professor
definitely doesn't live here.

I almost kissed a girl once.

Yeah.

I'm pretty sure
she wanted me to do it.

Who was she?

It... where were you?

It was at math camp.

Of course,
you went to math camp.

You know what?

Uh, sorry, I...

I wanna hear this story.

So it was a girl at math camp.

Last summer,
we were the last two people

to leave the bonfire
on pie night.

What, like you cooked pies
in the fire?

Pie, like the number.

Everyone stays up all night,
'cause, you know,

pie never ends.

Okay, so you
and this girl are the last two

to leave the pie night bonfire,
and she's pretty cute.

Yeah.

And really smart.

I hope you told her that.

I didn't.

Where was she sitting?

Right next to me.

She put her head on my shoulder.

Oh God.

She wanted you to do it.

That's what I thought.

So what did you do?

I asked her if she could take
her head off my shoulder.

Why?

Because the angle
for the kiss wouldn't work

if her head was there.

Oh God, Paulie.

What?

Nothing.

What happened next?

We just sort
of stared at each other

for a while.

Why didn't you make a move?

I thought about it,
but ultimately,

how much do you know about
the Markov decision process?

Hold on, I...

No, she wanted you to kiss her
and you were doing

maths problems.

I was just approximating
initial state probabilities.

And then she left?

She ran away, crying
before I could do anything.

What was I supposed to do?

Take a chance.

Follow your heart.

Please tell me
you went after her.

No, I went back to my cabin
and...

Went back to your cabin
and what?

Hand me the binoculars.

I think I see a red Chevy Volt.

It just disappeared
behind those trees.

What if he's not here?

Then we'll look again tomorrow.

We are 100 miles
from the P.O. boxes

where I first saw him.

What if Spider Lake
was just a decoy?

What if it wasn't?

This was a mistake.

I'm so stupid.

You know what's crazy,

those baby loons
were born this spring

and in a couple of months
they'll down

to the Gulf of Mexico
all by themselves.

What about the parents?

The parents teach them
everything they know

and then take off.

So the kids just figure it out
as they go?

They just figure it out.

Where's your mom?

I don't know.

My dad died when I was little.

Sorry.

He would have been
a really important scientist

if he hadn't.

He was awesome.

Yeah, my mom wasn't.

Where did they just go?

Yeah, that was weird, right?

It can't be private.

All Minnesota waterways
are public.

Let's go.

What the hell?

Damn it!

It's a sand bar.

Good evening, Paulie Go.

It's him.

How does he know your name?

Beautiful night, isn't it?

Say something.

Professor Shikenjanski?

Call me "Chuck".

Okay.

Chuck, okay.

How do we get over there, Chuck?

How did you find this place?

I hacked the university's
human resource department.

Outstanding.

Thanks.

Maybe you should tell them about
all your other crimes.

What can I do for you, Paulie?

I developed a compounding
conclusion algorithm

for intuition learning that
could ultimately boost

emotional capacity
by at least 36 percent.

Simulated or realised?

Realised, obviously.

Outstanding.

I can save
you at least six months

of development on
conclusion conversions alone.

What do you want?

Let him in your lab.

Well, that's not something I do.

I'm sorry.

Just review my work.

Please,
you'll see what I'm capable of,

but we would be capable if you...

I'll consider it.

Is that it?

We should go.

Paulie.

Dude, that guy was super weird.

Genius is often misunderstood.

Maybe.

But he could also be hiding
local schoolchildren

in his basement.

What's with all the security?

We're not the only ones
looking for him.

Who else?

The government,
the Swedes, business leaders,

anyone who cares about
technological innovation.

But why can't they just meet
with him on campus?

Because Professor Shikenjanski
is never on campus.

He lectures remotely.

Seriously?

That way,
he doesn't have to waste time

with people when he could be
doing research.

Or he's actually
a super villain?

He should have asked
more questions.

And invited you.

Exactly.

I mean, no, he just...

I could help him
change the world.

I would make him proud.

I would.

He said he'd consider your work.

He didn't mean it.

No.

No way.

Paulie, now is not the time
to be sad.

You just executed a successful
cross-country manhunt.

That's amazing.

And we need to celebrate.

Tadaa!

Mini golf?

I work here part time.

What color ball do you want?

I don't really feel like playing
right now.

Got you something for that.

Take a sip.

Tastes like cinnamon gasoline.

I think that's their slogan.

You want some?

I'm driving.

Right.

You're up.

Cut it out.

Stop thinking about
the professor.

If he doesn't realise
how brilliant you are,

than he's stupid.

But he's the smartest...

Enough!

You don't wanna play golf.

Fine.

Then let's dance.

Come on.

No one's here.

Let me see some moves.

Let go, Paulie.

Just have fun.

Yeah.

Oh, I love this one.

I'm at the edge of the sunset

I'm looking in on my wall

Indecisions,
I can hear my inhibition

Sorry, dude, we're just buddies.

Thank you for picking me though.

It means a lot.

Are you okay?

Okey-do key, Miss Anderson,
your condition is not normally

a cause for concern

in the early stages
of pregnancy.

10 weeks?

8, I think.

Come in.

I found a dashing young
father-to-be

wandering the halls.

Jesus.

What?

Oh my God, I am so sorry.

I thought... oh my God.

What's going on?

Are we done?

Maybe limited vaginal bleeding
or spotting is not a major deal,

but if the bleeding
gets heavier,

it could foreshadow
an ectopic pregnancy

or a miscarriage
in the second trimester.

Heavy...

Could signal
placental abruption.

So what are you gonna do
about your videos?

What do you mean?

Are you still gonna make
fishing videos when you get...

Yeah.

I'll probably do 'em topless,
so people don't pay attention

to the fact that I'm...

Really?

No.

What kind of question is that?

I don't know, sorry.

Is the dad the guy
who dumped you?

How do you know about that?

I...

Of course, you know about that.

What did you do,
look through my phone again?

Your dad told me.

Told you what?

That Clint's a pothead
who dumped me

after I had a nervous breakdown.

He told me the pothead part.

Why did you have
a nervous breakdown?

Because I messed up!

And I'm turning into my mom.

She was pregnant at 18, too.

My dad thought he was gonna be
an air force pilot

or a rock star.

But he got to have you.

Paulie, you may be a genius,
but you don't know shit.

At least, you don't really need
to be concerned about

an ectopic pregnancy
or placental abruption.

That doctor was so weird,
it's like he couldn't shut up.

It was like he malfunctioned.

His patterns were actually
kind of robotic,

the way he held onto words
was like an auto-engager.

What's an auto-engager?

It's um, a reoccurring tic
or gesture that's meant to

endear the bot to actual humans,

but it's said that bots
often deploy

in obvious gestures like winking
or whistling.

Or repeating the same
generic response

over and over again.

Holy shit.

Outstanding!

No, it can't be.

Shikenjanski would have to be
so far ahead

of the rest of the world...

Right?

And he wouldn't wanna keep
that a secret.

Actually, he would.

The public is worried

that robots are going to
overthrow human civilisation,

so every major advancement is
met with waves of regulatory

and ethical challenges.

That sounds smart.

It's insane.

This whole conversation
is insane.

You wanna go back?

Supposed to be a road coming.

I don't see anything.

Stop!

There.

Uh, Professor, this is Paulie
Go.

We spoke earlier in the lake.

On the lake.

Look, we know your secret.

Why would you say that?

I don't get it.

There's no space for a lab.

Plenty of space
to stash bodies, though

The bodies aren't the problem,
it's all the equipment

and servers.

We're talking about
different things.

What are you doing here?

Uh, I'm... I'm sorry, ma'am.

There's been a mistake.

We're in the wrong place.

Who knows you're here?

Where is the professor?

The professor is
a very private person.

And doesn't appreciate people
sneaking on his property.

We called from the gate.

But you didn't have
an appointment, did you?

Do you work for the professor?

Look, if you leave
before the professor gets back,

I won't...

Too late.

Paulie Go and friends.

Shit!

Great to see you again.

Chuck,
disengage and get back in the house.

Outstanding.

Woah.

What the...

You're the professor.

I'm so sorry.

I didn't mean to do that,
I didn't mean to do that.

I hate guns.

I just...

Please just... just come inside,
just come inside.

I'm sorry.

You coming?

I don't host visitors,
so I'm afraid

I don't really have any snacks.

You've got all the Santa fish.

Yeah, Maltby's Department Store

used to sell a new one
of these every Christmas.

Until they closed in 2012.

So you grew up here.

I grew up in the cities.

But your bio says you grew up
in New York.

That's Chuck's bio.

Oh my God.

You've got the muskie.

Please be careful with that
one, it's very rare.

Oh, s... sorry.

When I was little,
I wanted the Santa muskie

so bad.

But my parents could only find
the tiger muskie on eBay.

Ugh, I hate tiger muskies.

Right?

I... I
really should have them in a case.

But Chuck likes them out, so.

Chuck likes things?

Of course.

So why did you come here?

Because I developed

a compounding
conclusion algorithm

for intuition learning
that could ultimately...

Yeah, yeah, 36 percent, I know,

you said that last night.

You were there?

No, she patched
into Chuck's audio interceptors.

That's right.

Don't you have
fully-integrated comm override?

Yes, but not remotely.

Chuck was fully autonomous
on the dock.

His auto-engager...

I am...

...working on that,
it's very tricky.

I want to work with you.

I don't work with other people.

Me neither.

What about her?

She makes fishing videos.

Why?

Professor,
in addition to my algorithm,

I developed my own methodology

for emotional evaluation
regressions.

Can you scale from individual
to group dynamics?

Obviously.

Interesting.

Why did you build a man?

Uh, for your secret identity?

Uh, computer science wasn't
exactly friendly to people

who looked like me.

But it's better now, right?

Where's the restroom?

End of the hall.

Don't touch anything.

So how'd you
pick the name, Chuck?

Honestly...

...I named him after Chucky.

Chucky.

The doll that comes to life
and kills people.

Oh.

I know, I know,
it's... it's weird.

But got a messed-up sense
of humor.

No.

That's bad ass.

Hey, Chuck.

Oh, wait a second,
so you got the job before...

Ah, Chuck got the job.

Right, Chuck got the job

even though Chuck
didn't exist yet.

The university awarded Chuck
several million dollars

to build a remote lab.

There in on it, right?

I mean,
they would have to be in on it.

The only people who know
the truth about Chuck

are the president
of the university,

the head of the computer science
department,

and one very wealthy trustee.

And us.

I suppose.

What are you gonna tell people?

I mean, Chuck's amazing.

Don't you want people to see
your research?

Your generation cares too much
about credit.

It's not about the credit.

It's about the work.

Exactly.

But don't you want to inspire
other people?

The work is everything.

Professor, Chuck's door
was open,

but I didn't see any servers
or docking equipment.

Where are all the processors?

Are they running simulations
while he charges?

It's a good question.

Let me show you.

Are those brainwaves?

In a way.

When Chuck isn't interacting
with me,

he reprocesses his day.

Like a dream?

Reinforcement learning.

Wow.

How did you build this?

I told local contractors
it was a high-tech bomb shelter

for the nuclear apocalypse.

And they believed it?

They didn't understand why some
of the equipment had to be

brought in by helicopter, but...

I knew it.

I mean, people are ridiculous.

Beyond ridiculous.

Can I get you anything?

Water, oat milk, a piña colada?

A piña colada?

It's a frozen beverage,
3 ounces pineapple juice,

1 ounce white rum, 1 ounce co...

I... I don't want a piña colada.

No problem.

Remind me of your name.

Uh, my name is Beyoncé.

Of course.

Chuck?

Yes, Beyoncé.

What is the capital of Zimbabwe?

Harare.

How big was the largest
freshwater bass ever caught?

22 pounds, 4 ounces.

It was caught on Lake Montgomery
in the state of Georgia

by George Perry
on June 2nd, 1932.

Would you like to try Qigong,
Beyoncé?

Uh, sure.

Outstanding.

Do you feel present, Beyoncé?

I feel different.

Tell me about your work.

Uh, I'm a ninja.

Of course.

Do you still keep
in touch with your colleagues

from grad school?

I didn't go to grad school.

Oh, people can be such bullies.

What?

People, they can be such bullies
when they are jealous

of your intellect
and accomplishments.

Is that what
Professor Shikenjanski says?

That's what Cheryl says.

Cheryl.

Who helped you with this?

I wrote everything myself.

Huh.

There were very few mistakes
in the architecture.

What mistakes?

Well,
if this algorithm were to work,

the emotional range you aspire
to integrate is far too broad.

Like Chuck's range is about
60 percent of the spectrum.

60 percent is a dog.

You're wrong.

What
else do you and Cheryl do for fun?

Cheryl loves canoeing.

She also loves camping,
a hot cup of tea, and snuggling.

Do you snuggle with Cheryl?

Whose Cheryl?

Hey, Chuck.

Who's this guy?

Dr. Roman Green was
the sweetest and strongest man

who ever lived.

He had a way
of holding you that let you know

you were safe.

You sure look a lot like him.

My nose isn't quite right
and my laugh needs to be warmer.

No.

Boundary Waters Canoe...

Chuck, go for a walk now!

How dare you?

You have no right to ask Chuck
about my relationships.

I'm sorry.

You need to leave.

Both of you need to leave.

What did I do?

You brought a snoop
into my house.

Uh, I wasn't snooping.

It's obvious they look the same.

Enough!

What about my work?

I don't care!

Paulie, she's in love
with her robot.

Chuck is on his way
to expressing a full range

of human emotions,

but without the pollution
of human flaws.

Bonding without jealousy,
persuasion without bullying.

He'll be perfect.

He'll be a tiger muskie!

Get out now!

No, this isn't fair!

Out!

Professor, please!

If I see
or hear from either one of you again,

I will call the FBI.

Why couldn't you just
keep your mouth shut?

Paulie, she's delusional.

She's seven full years ahead
of the entire world.

She's afraid
of the entire world.

No, she's afraid the world
will slow her down

and she's right.

She's afraid that people
like you will judge her,

and label her,

and prevent her from reaching
her true potential.

She is or you are?

You don't get it.

What don't I get?

Greatness, ambition.

You're hiding from your life
in a fishing boat.

At least, I've lived.

At least, I don't spend my life
working on robots,

because I'm scared
of human relationships.

At least,
I didn't get knocked up.

Shit.

Are you okay, Chuck?

391,000 people were injured
last year

in car accidents involving
a distracted driver.

Shut up!

Either one of you
open your mouths

and I'm leaving you both
in a ditch.

Shit.

What did you do?

I didn't do anything.

Maybe he just wants to pass us.

Yeah.

What's the speed limit?

The speed limit
is the maximum speed

at which a car
can legally drive in...

Shut up!

You two are in lot of trouble.

Dad?

You were lucky, I'm the one
that found you first.

Sir, are you okay?

Outstanding.

Okay.

You two need to talk to me.

Why would this woman say
you kidnapped the professor

if you didn't?

Because she's nuts.

Nope, that's not good enough.

Every sheriff's department
north of St. Cloud

is looking for you.

This is serious.

Would you like to try Qigong?

Uh, no.

Wait, what?

Is that doggie domesticated?

One across the street?

Hmm.

Hardly, but professor, we...

Where are you, doggie?

What is his deal?

Avery.

Look, I... I can't help you
unless I know everything.

Alright, you need to tell me
everything.

Paulie.

Paulie.

Go ahead, Paulie.

Tell him everything.

I'm done being an accessory.

An accessory to what?

Avery's not going to college
and she's pregnant.

Is that true?

Why wouldn't you tell me?

Is that a joke?

Honey.

I didn't tell you,
because I'm your daughter!

Which means when I get scared,
I go fishing

and pretend my problems
don't exist

or I run away like mom.

Avery.

Come here, doggie.

Chuck.

Chuck, get out of the road.

Is that doggie
33 percent terrier?

I don't know.

Come back right now,
that's a direct command.

Chuck!

Oh my God,
oh my God, it's not my fault.

He just ran right out
onto the road.

What the heck?

Ma'am, you need to tell me
your brother's date of birth.

I told you it's irrelevant.

It's protocol.

If we don't follow protocol,
we can't do our jobs.

Lady, we have a lot to do.

So if you're not
gonna be helpful, I...

Nothing you were doing

and nothing you have ever done
is as important as finding

my companion.

You mean your brother?

Just frickin' find him!

Hey, where's Chuck?

Step into my office.

Where did you take him?

He chose to get in the truck.

You kidnapped him.

Technically, it's theft.
My office, now!

Look.

I need to get to the bottom
of whatever's been going on

for the last few days,
which means that both of you...

What did you tell him, Paulie?

If you told him anything,
I will end your career

before it starts.

Threats are not productive
right now, professor.

Productive.

This young man kidnapped my...
My...

Brother.

Exactly.

That's what I said.
He kidnapped my brother.

You were wrong!

You were totally wrong.

You said that Chuck was ready to
take on the real world,

but he wasn't.

It doesn't matter how smart
he was,

because he wasn't designed
to live.

He was designed to be flawless.

I know, that's the problem.

Enough.

I've had it up to here
with the yelling and the lies.

No more lies.

You said wasn't.

He wasn't ready.

What did you mean by wasn't?

If anything happened to Chuck,
Paulie,

I will make sure that
you are blackballed

from every top university.

I don't care.

Then why did you come looking
for me?

Because I wanted you to like me!

I don't have any friends
at home, and I...

I always thought it was,
because the other kids

weren't smart enough
to be my friends.

I thought if anyone
would understand me,

it would be you.

You fit the equation in my head.

I need to go find Avery.

What are you doing?

I know about the robot.

I'm sorry, I don't...
I don't know why you'd

say something like that.

I saw his parts
all over the road.

What?

Not all of his parts.

Look, uh...

Mom, hi.

Sorry.

Sorry, I didn't call you back.

Oh, I can't talk right now,
'cause I'm on a jet ski.

A jet ski, yeah.

Yeah, okay, I'll call you
right back

after I find my friend.

I love you.

Bye.

Hey.

Can I talk to you for a sec?

Whose jet ski is that?

I think it's your neighbor's.

You stole it?

I needed to find you.

Why?

I don't know.

I mean...

I'm sorry.

I'm really sorry,

I should never have told
your dad that

you got knocked up, impregnated.

It's okay.

He was gonna find out
at some point.

I just...

I really want to be your friend.

I've never had a friend
like you before.

Paulie.

Come here.

Okay.

God, it's huge.

Careful.

Sorry.

What should I do?

Woah!

Alright, Paulie, hold it steady.

Oh, okay.

I'll get the net.

We did it!

It's a real muskie, right?

The fish of 10,000 casts.

Oh yeah.

What should we do now?

You let it go.

Shouldn't we take
a picture first?

No, we'll remember we caught it.

Of course,
we're gonna take a picture.

People make their whole life
for a fish like this.

Oh my...

How come Minnesota has
so many lakes?

Paul Bunyan
and Babe the Blue Ox?

Legend has it that Paul and Babe
were so big,

each of their footprints
formed a new lake

as they wrestled
around the state.

That's ridiculous.

Yeah, but it's fun
to think about

when you're a kid.

You know there are ways
to make the actual science

fun to think about, too.

I'm sure there are.

There's actually a Paul Bunyan
theme park

that's not too far from here.

Could take you there
before you drive back.

Sure.

If we survive this.

Sit.

I watched your videos.

What?

You're fishing videos.

Your outburst about Chuck
and the tiger muskies

caught me off guard.

And I was angry,
so I didn't consider the merits

of the argument until after.

Which channel did you?

I found them all.

And now, I'm curious.

Why do you make them?

She's a great teacher.

She really connects
with her viewers.

No, I don't.

Those connections aren't real.

My audience doesn't know me.

It's all a bullshit substitute
for actual relationships.

I get it.

Professor,
I'm sorry about Chuck.

I had no right to take him.

Chuck?

Did Paulie kidnap you?

Paulie invited me to accompany
him and Beyoncé in the truck,

I chose to go.

Where is he?

Online.

Come on.

Our little episode has made me
realise that

I need to spend more time
on campus.

Isolation is limiting
my scientific ceiling.

Ultimately, I will let the world
know who Chuck is

and that he was invented
by someone who looks like me.

But not until I'm ready.

This says that you promise
not to expose my identity

or share any aspects of my work
without my permission.

And in return,
I will sponsor your admission

to the university
of your choosing.

I assume this works
for you, too?

Woah, I...

This is amazing.

It's just something cheap,

because I don't have
any money yet.

When I'm the most important
scientist in the world,

I'll have a lot more.

Most important scientist
in the world.

Is that still the plan?

Yeah.

I'm just in less of a rush.

See ya.

See ya.