Pack Up Your Troubles (1932) - full transcript

The boys' Army buddy, Eddie Smith, is killed in the trenches in France, leaving his baby girl an orphan. Back home after Armistice, they try to find Eddie's father and turn the child over to him. Unfortunately, they keep coming up with the wrong Smiths, and in the process disrupt a wedding by proclaiming the baby to be the groom's child. To evade the Welfare Association, they try to skip town, raising money for their escape by hocking their lunch wagon. But they accidentally knock the bank president unconscious and wind up being hunted down for bank robbery.

Play one of the best new FPS shooters,
search Steam for PROJECT WARLOCK

Well, that's one more, and the last one.

- The last what?
- My last trip to Coney Island.

I should hope so. I can smell hot dog for
a week after I come away from that place.

Ooh, it hurts.

Well, it appears that our boyfriends never
heard of any other place except Coney.

What do we go there for anyway?

We could get the same effect by staying
at home and hitting ourselves on the head.

Honestly. I'd rather go down
to some nice quiet dock

and watch the pile-drivers.

Shoot the chutes and slide the slides.

I'm tattooed with splinters from the back
of my neck to the tip of my heels.

Me too. I've got more scars
than a bullfighter.

I know the merry-go-round,

I know the pedigree
of every wooden horse in the place.

Well, that sycamore sorrel
I was riding tonight

never came from the bluegrass country.

Oh, look at 'em. Our service stripes.

Each one just another trip to Coney Island.

Get a load of Agnes, the third from the left.

That refrigerator salesman gave her to me.

And you remember those two
Cornell freshman. Were they fresh!

Will I ever forget those two financiers?

They bought a car there to get home!

And you remember that fat man
from St Louis?

And the Youngs' convention!

- Oh dear.
- And remember that Japanese geezer?

And that shiners ball!

And then I remember two sailors!

Paper! Final Telegraph! Paper!

I really am most frightfully sorry.

- I should think you would be.
- I look just like a mud turtle.

And these are our fall clothes.

Girls, I'll tell you what we'll do.

You come with me right away in my car
and I'll get you some new ones.

This is another of my creations.

I want you to particularly observe
that over the bodice here,

we have that... it gives it that...
those sort of lines that you can't...

I think it's positively
one of the finest,

most adorable things I've ever created.

Particularly here,
when you get over the... When you...

As soon as the, erm...
You may go, my dear.

And I want you to... Oh, this.
This is my dream dress.

You possibly observe that this one
has more of the, er... It's more...

More than the other, of course.

And through here, I think you'll find that
it's positively peachy, don't you think so?

Really. This one has more...
gives you the... gives the lines of the, er...

You may go, too.

Oh, Mr Loder, so sweet of you to come.

I've just ruined these two ladies' dresses
and I want new outfits for both of them.

What miracle of inspiration
must have led you to my door?

I have some of
the most adorable creations. Come.

I must show them to you at once.

Now I must study you.
Every line, every curve...

You first, my dear.

- What's the matter?
- Nothing. Nothing.

To Pierre, nothing is impossible.

I have... Oh, it's an inspiration.

Oh, I have just the thing.
It's positively alluring.

Come, my dear.

Go get that bewitching,

midnight blue Canton crepe
with the velvet jacket. Go.

You're next, my dear.

Perfectly heavenly.

- 36 is the size.
- Yes, of course.

Oh, I have just the thing.
This is positively gorgeous.

I know that you'll positively love it.

Come here, my dear.

Go get that new colour combination,

the one with the transparent black velvet
and the chartreuse crepe.

Run along, my dear.
Oh, this is positively beautiful.

It clings to you
with that studied carelessness.

It comes over the hips like that
and gives the effect of more of a... of a...

Pardon me.

Looks like we're going to be
all dressed up and no place to go.

What do you mean, no place to go?
I'll take you two girls out any day.

- And bring a boyfriend for you too.
- Oh, really?

- We've only Saturday afternoon off.
- That's a date, then.

Hey, will yous dames hurry
and come out of there?

You want me to lose
these swell customers?

Well, er... where are we gonna go?

I'll spend the rest of the week thinking out
someplace that's smart and original.

- Oh!
- Marvellous!


Oh dear!

Aren't they precious?

Well, where are we going?

Ah, well, that's the surprise.

Somewhere very smart
and frightfully original.

Come along now. Here we are.

The whole week I've been trying to think
of something different to do. And there it is.

- We're going to do the whole place.
- Rather!

The merry-go-rounds and
the shooting-the-what-do-you-call-its...

Come on!

- Isn't this wonderful?
- Marvellous!

I bet you'd have never have thought
of coming here for an afternoon!

- Oh, no!
- Why, you've got everything!

There's a shooting gallery!
I used to be pretty good at that once!

Oh, look! There's a dart place.

I'm most fearfully expert at throwing darts.

Come on, let's have a try!

Come on. Let's go home.

We can't run out on them.
They think they're giving us a swell time.

And look at the clothes he bought us!

What good will a lot of swell clothes do us

if we're going to have them
rubbed off on the roller coaster?

We wouldn't have worn them
if we knew we were coming here.

Those boys sure know how to pick
a smart and original place

Oh, come on.

Step this way. Three darts for a quarter.

Be careful that Jake doesn't recognise you.

Oh, yes.

- I think you're gonna be great at this.
- I know I am. You don't know me.

- Flies all over the place!
- Oh, yes, aren't they horrid!

Well, hello, sister.

My goodness, you must be careful.
These are dangerous.

- Stupid of me, wasn't it?
- I'll show you how it's done.

That was close.

There, you see?

- 25 cents, please.
- That wasn't too bad, was it?

Well, not so bad and not so good.

Not so good? Well, here's a wager for you.

I bet you all of that against a nickel
you don't do any better.

You're on.

- Not with that.
- Oh, yes. I like the little ones best.

- Beginner's luck.
- Why, that's remarkable!

- For the first time, too!
- They just all fell right down.

You certainly are clever.

I don't seem to be as good at this
as I expected.

No, you're not so hot.

What do you suppose is the matter?

Why don't you try it with your eyes shut?

That's a capital idea! I never thought of that!

- Did I hit one?
- No, you didn't.

Fun House! See the funniest things!

Trying to be funny
in front of all these people! Cut it out!

Say, listen! That girl belongs to me!
You leave your...

Come on, boys!

What are you trying to do?
Make a monkey out of me?

Say, listen.
Didn't I tell you that girl belongs to me?

The next time I catch you
monkeying around, I'll...

Come on. Let's get out of here.

Did you see that?
The most extraordinary thing.

Every time you open your arms,
you seem to get them full of women.

Look! Come on!

My word! A lady in distress!

Get up! Say, didn't I tell you
this was my dame?

Come on.

What do you think you're doing?

I'm going to knock that guy's block off.

- You and who else?
- Me and nobody else.

- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.

Say, you know...

- Wasn't that great?
- Can't you find somewhere else to play?

Why, sure.

- Up there. Look.
- So long.

Come on. Let's go.

Hey, you can't go down here with that.

What do you think I'm gonna do?
Leave it up here?

- OK, but don't drop it.
- I won't. It cost me a nickel.

- I'm scared to death.
- You needn't be. I'll look after you.

Oh dear.

- That was something, wasn't it? You like it?
- Great!

- Let's try this one.
- All right. Come on.

Just a minute. I'll get some tickets.

Say, what's going on here?

I paid a nickel for this.

My word. This is beginning
to be a coincidence.

I say, come along. Isn't this conveyance
getting kind of monotonous?

Well, this is certainly
a smart and original place.

Just another Saturday afternoon.

Thank heavens we're staying home
for a change. None of those shoot-the...

Come in.

- How do you do?
- How do you do?

We thought if you girls weren't
doing anything you'd like to go with us.

Where are you going?

We're going to Coney Island.