No More Orchids (1932) - full transcript

At the urging of her curmudgeon old grandfather Jerome Cedric (C. Aubrey Smith), spoiled rich kid Annie Holt (Carole Lombard) is forced to marry into royalty in order to save her banker father, Bill Holt (Walter Connolly), from financial ruin. The man she really desires is Tony Gage (Lyle Talbot). It takes a well-written insurance policy and a sacrificial act on the part of a close relative to re-unite Annie and Tony.

Subtitles: Lu?s Filipe Bernardes

- She left at 1:26, sir.
- Jolly nice of her.

She's probably ordered the pilot
to take her for a joy ride over Paris.

- Will you wait much longer, sir?
- We'll wait for a week if it suits her.

Her grandfather practically
owns this line.

They'd sink the blooming boat to please
his precious granddaughter.

Here she is, sir.

- Come on, she's here!
- Hooray, come on!

Miss Holt.

Miss Holt, we've arrived.

Mais le b?teau devait partir
depuis minuit.



The ship was due to sail at midnight.
She's waited two hours already.

The ship, Miss Holt, the ship.

Merci.

S'il vous pla?t.
Attention.

Pardon me, young man.

Tsk-tsk-tsk.

Mustn't be impatient, ma'am.
That's Miss Ann Holt.

Heiress to the biggest fortune
in America.

- How nice for her.
- Oh, yes.

- Everything is supposed to wait for her.
- Uh-huh.

Good morning, Grandmother!

Young man, you're perfectly right.

What she needs is a good walloping.

- Where have you been?
- What's the big idea?



- Well, it's about time.
- Who do you think you are, anyway?

How nice of you all to be
so glad to see me.

How are you, sweet?

- Hello, dear!
- Hello, Ann, how are you?

You heard me, where have you been?

Dear old darling, did we have a time?

- Everyone was there, you missed it.
- And you missed the boat train.

- Hm-hmm.
- Look at yourself!

And your feet, they're soaking.

Can I help it if I slipped?

And very wet water in these
parts too.

You come and get right out
of those clothes.

Do you think by any chance I won't
get double pneumonia?

The only thing that'll save you
is a hot rum.

- You're right.
- No, you don't!

You're going to get into a steaming
bath this minute!

But don't you see, I just had
a cold one, ducky.

Don't you ducky me.

Scatterbrains!
Stewardess.

Yes, Mrs. Holt?

I want some kind of a tub for a foot bath
and a large can of mustard.

Yes, mum. English or French mustard?

It's immaterial to me what
language it speaks!

What excellent service,
just what I wanted.

But Miss Holt, this drink is for
the gentleman over there.

Mustn't keep the young lady waiting.

Let that be a lesson to you, Crawford.

Put that down!

Such is my intention, dearie.

Do you want me to carry you
to your cabin?

- You're not man enough, darling.
- Oh, I'm not, huh?

No, Granny, no, no, no...

- Where to, ma'am?
- I'll show you.

Pardon me, these might scratch you.

This way, young man.

Do you charge by the mile
or is it a flat rate?

Do you mean to say you were a physical
wreck before you used Peptona?

We're off!

That's fine. Now get some towels.

That was charming. Next time, driver,
we'll go through the park.

- Radio?
- No, thanks.

I'll just wait and see it in the newsreel.

Young man, any time I can
do you a favor...

- Not at all, it was a pleasure.
- Oh, sir...

To help you out, Mrs. Holt.

- Good morning.
- Good morning.

Goodbye.

Pick me up again sometime.

Now take off that dress!

But he's gone!

Oh!

Hurry up!

- You had me worried to death.
- I told you I'd make the ship.

Yes, but when? You're darned lucky
they waited for you.

Come on, get in this chair!

Stop bullying me!

Landing on this boat like
a three-ring circus.

Ouch! Sadist!

You never could drink anyway.

I'm the only one in the whole family
who knows how to handle liquor.

Wiggle your fingers around in the water
and stir up this mustard.

I wonder who he is.

As fine and upstanding a young fellow
as I've seen in many a day.

Amen, sister!

And you won't get anywhere
with him either.

Why, darling?

Because he thinks you're just
a spoiled brat.

In spite of which, I wonder.

Sorry, Miss Holt.

- What did the purser say?
- He says his name is A. Gage.

But he can't sit him at your table...

...because he wants all his meals
sent up to his state room.

You go find this here A. Gage and tell him
I need a fourth hand at bridge.

Righto!

Success to you!

- Ann!
- Oh, Anne!

Coming.

# For he's my man... #
Maybe.

How are we doing?

Come here and let me gouge
out your eyes.

- Always ready to oblige a friend.
- You're done for, dear.

- Doubled and vulnerable.
- Take a look at that score, palsy.

That's thirty-six hundred more
you owe me.

Chisler. As soon as we land,
I'll get my allowance.

So sorry, darling,

but double-entry bookkeeping
has always baffled me.

Darling, I wouldn't tax your brain
for anything.

Choose yourself a bauble,
they're all worth hocking.

Hmm... I'll take this one.

That one, Rita, my fine woman,
is the only one you can't have.

Bill gave me that.

- Who's Bill? The prince?
- Ha!

Bill is my father, and a man,
my friend, a man!

- Hm, sounds as if you like him.
- Right, he's my pal.

- And being his mother, I might add...
- Sold, sold!

After which demonstration
of fine family feeling,

take your pick, little one.

- Can I have the pearls?
- Pearls it is.

- Never mind, Nina, I'll go.
- Bien, madame.

You can hold this securely,
but notice I cast them before you.

She's calling you a swine, Rita.

Some of my best friends are swine.

- Now, Hodges!
- I did the best I could, miss.

- Where is he?
- In the gymnasium.

Ahoy!

So this is how you keep in condition
to carry women.

Haughty, I calls it.

Very pretty.

- Hello, A. Gage.
- Hello.

- What does the A stand for?
- Anthony.

Oh... And the Gage is some
sort of plum?

A gauge is a standard of measurement.

A measurement of quality.

- A. Holt. A stands for Ann.
- Yes, I knew that.

- Oh, you've been reading the papers.
- Yes.

Congratulations on your engagement
to Prince Carlos.

Thanks... and very pleasant it was too.

Oh, I'm sure of that.

- You sound kind of resentful.
- Oh, no, not at all.

Quite normal for a rich gal
to buy herself a title.

Say, what do you know about
my engagement?

I happen to work for the law firm
that handles your grandfather's interests.

This alliance is setting him
back plenty.

You sound a little bit like him, "dour".

- Hm?
- "Dour" is Scotch for sour.

Do you speak Scotch?

In my little circle gentlemen
usually answer ladies.

I know all about your little circle.

This man shows every sign
of having a terrible crush on me.

He's not letting himself in for
anything so umpleasant.

Unpleasant? You have no idea
how nice I can be.

I've also no idea of being a little episode
to brighten up the voyage for you.

I'm way ahead of you.

So you are. We'll soon fix that.

- My horse always wins!
- I wouldn't say always.

You big brute!

But you haven't beaten me in the
important thing yet.

- Let me help you.
- Oh, go away!

Don't you strike me.

So you don't find me attractive.

Oh, yes, you're a very desirable
creature.

And very potent.

But you're too used to snapping your fingers
and having everyone toe the mark.

- Most men love it.
- I must be exceptional.

That's what intrigues me.

Hey, you really are trying
to start something, aren't you?

Hm-hmm.

- My dear Miss Holt...
- I hate to be formal!

- You're utterly charming.
- Ahhh!

- But you've been badly brought up.
- Spoiled.

All your worst qualities have been
thoroughly developed...

...and your good ones left to rot.

I like you too.

You're clever and attractive,
but you've got nothing to back it up.

No standard.

In other words, I need "A. Gage".

No, you're impossible.

Well I'll be a...

Hey... attendant!

Attendant!

# What's the use of worrying #

# Your young mind away #

# Trouble may come hurrying #
# But it's a nice day today #

# Smile while you go along #

# As you were at play #

# Happily just sing a song #

- I'll take that bet.
- You're on.

Is this a zipper?

Four all for our side.

Now, don't pay me yet.
I'll give you a chance to win a bet.

I bet you can't say "Peter Piper picked
a peck of pickled peppers."

I'll bet I can.

Peter Piper plicked a pleck...

No, wait a minute.

Pleter Pliter plicked...

You owe me a hundred now,
come on.

Oh, it's a racket.

Where are you going, Ann?

Big Gage hunting.

Well, as I live and breathe,
if it isn't A. Gage.

I've looked all over this boat for you.

I always say, isn't it a small world?
That what I always say.

Too small sometimes.

If I'm not too inquisitive, might I ask
for the pleasure of this dance?

- It's too hot in there.
- It's mighty cool out here, Colonel.

Well, if you don't mind,
I'll do the leading.

You know, I have a queer feeling
you and I have danced like this before.

All alone on the deck of a ship.

We have. We did, years ago
on our honeymoon.

- Our what?
- Our honeymoon.

Oh yes, of course.
My wretched memory for faces.

Well, you see, it was such
a brief honeymoon.

Marriage took place too soon
after our meeting.

Would you mind refreshing my memory
as to where we met?

- On your grandfather's desk.
- Desk?

Where I first saw your picture.

Oh!

And so we were married.

- Were we awfully happy?
- Well, at first yes.

But when you started flaunting
those big income checks...

from your grandfather in my face...

You've got it all figured out,
haven't you?

- Oh, yes.
- You're funny.

Thank you.

Well, go on.
Was I mean with my money?

No. As a matter of fact,
you showered me with gifts.

With platinum suspenders, and knickknacks
and things, huh?

Yes. And a new punching bag...

...when I liked my old one.

You know, those are the things
that wear a man down.

And so we parted.

It had to come.

- Aren't we going to finish this dance?
- Well, someday, maybe.

In other words, you threw me over
for an old punching bag.

And there's no chance
for reconciliation?

Impossible.

The last time you said impossible
you kissed me.

Well, I assure you it won't
happen again.

Young man!

How much have you had
to drink today?

- Oh, fifty or sixty highballs.
- Good, I thought maybe you'd been drinking.

- How'd you like to make a little pin money.
- Sounds interesting.

I'll bet you $10 you can't say "Peter
Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers."

- Just ten dollars?
- I'll make it more if you want to.

Peter Piper picked a peck of
pickled peppers.

- Pertly pecking pretty pippins...
- Stop! Don't waste it!

You and I have a floating gold mine
on this ship. Come on!

You know, I like that man. Mind if I take
a shot at him tomorrow?

If you don't mind my taking
a shot at you.

What about your engagement
to the prince?

That was all B.G.

Before Gage. It was grandfather's
idea anyway.

This is going to complicate matters,
isn't it?

Don't count on it, ducky.
I generally get what I want.

They play too many waltzes.
I like to rumba.

- Oh, Captain!
- Yes, Mrs. Holtz.

- Got a new one for you.
- What will it cost me this time?

I'll give you five dollars
if you say it.

I hope you win, skipper, just
to break her.

- Is it as difficult as the one yesterday?
- Worse.

Now listen. This is better than
rubber buggy bumpers.

Uh... again.

This is better than rubber buggy bumpers.

This is better than ruggy buggy...

This is better than rubber
bubby gumpers...

I give up, I give up.

- You stayed up too late last night.
- How did you know?

- Well, I was around myself.
- I thought so.

Hello.

Do you realize you haven't been
near me in days?

Yes, I realize that.

I'm in love.

I assumed that when you agreed
to marry the prince.

I'm in love with you.

Why don't you stop playing
for once in your life?

I'm not playing, I mean it.

Tony, tomorrow we land.
We may never see each other again.

That might be better for both of us.

Why are you so mean to me?

Perhaps it's my instinct for
self-preservation.

This is the first time I've ever
felt this way about anybody.

Oh, Tony, can't you believe me?

I'd like to, but I don't.

Why don't you go and dance?

- We've got to get some of our money back.
- Hey, Ann. Here's one for you.

I'll bet you ten bucks you can't say
"This is better than rubber buggy bumpers".

What's the matter with you?

Why, you're crying.

Waiter.
You boys figure it out.

I'd at least like to be at the house
when Ann gets there.

Check, please.

- But Bill, this is serious.
- I know it's serious,

but I haven't seen my daughter
for a year.

Why get excited? The Puritan Bank can't
be in a jam as long as Bill is president.

Thanks for the boost.

He means Jerome Cedric.

What's my father-in-law
got to do with it?

He'll help us out because of you.

Tell him the desperate condition
we're in.

That we need this money or the bank
will close its doors.

- He'll come through, I'm sure he will.
- Oh, will he?

He's been pretty lavish with
your daughter.

What he sees fit to do for Ann
is his business.

I'd see myself dead before I'd take
a penny of his money.

Well, we've got to get it somewhere.

Well, I'll be at the bank later.

I'll do anything you fellows advise.

But I will not go to my father-in-law.

Bill!

- Darling! Darling!
- Ann, my darling!

- Oh, my sweet!
- I'll swear you're prettier than ever.

How did I ever let you get
away from me?

Of course I'm only his mother,
but I've come back from Europe too.

My old sweetheart!

- How are you feeling, kid?
- Marvelous, till you've fractured my rib!

- You look marvelous, Miss Holt.
- Thank you, Annie, it's nice to be home.

- Kept everything nice and clean?
- Yes, madam, I've tried to.

Oh, pretty swell to have my two
gal friends back home.

Swell for the gal friends.

As if he'd been true to us
while we were away.

Cheerie little mausoleum, isn't it?

Fine example of Cedric taste.

It was pretty ghastly with you
away so long.

Well, I'm home now, darling,
and I'll never leave you again.

Will you two stop blocking traffic,
step on it!

It's worse than a couple of old ladies.

You dog, why didn't you meet me
at the boat?

I was having lunch with a new
Follies queen.

Liar! You'd never stand me up
for another woman.

- Bill, how sweet!
- Model of my little monoplane.

I sort of went in for flying to deaden
the monotony.

You that owns your own plane.

- Come aboard?
- Aye aye, captain.

- I missed you like the devil.
- I missed you too.

Wait till you see what I brung you.

You brung me yourself, that's enough.

- Still care for my Alexanders?
- Do ducks quack?

Good old Bill.

Gosh, pie face, I don't know how
I'm going to get along without you.

Maybe you won't have to.

- A great big maybe.
- What do you mean?

It'll be goodbye forever when
you marry your prince.

Will you join me in a moment's silence
about the prince?

A moment's silence it is.

And that, ducky, finishes the entire
conversation we'll have about him.

Come clean, honey.
What's up?

Well, it's a long, sad story and
rather difficult to tell.

Lady, you can tell a bartender anything.

Bartender, for the first time in
my life I'm really in love.

- You don't tell me.
- Met him on the boat.

Got it bad?

Head over heals, daffy,
delirious, dithery.

- I even dream about him.
- Lady, that is love.

- What's his name?
- Gage. Anthony Gage.

He's connected with
grandfather's attorneys.

Why don't you have him up
to dinner sometime?

I'd sort of like to meet him.

The gent will have none
of me, bartender.

He walked off the blinking boat
without even making a date,

say call up or anything.

Sounds like a sissy to me.

No, he likes me but he won't give in.
He thinks I'm a spoiled brat.

So you are, lady, so you are.

Oh!

Gosh, I'd like to see your grandfather's
face when he hears about this.

Oh, boy!

Telephone, Mr. Holt.
Mr. Burkhardt from the bank.

Tell him I'm out.
And tell him I told you so.

Those fellows get hysterical down there
when the least thing comes up.

Bill, is anything worrying you?

Certainly not. Why?

Seems to me there's a lot more
gray around those temples.

Well, that's to add to my
sex appeal, honey.

You're sure it hasn't anything
to do with the bank?

Come on, darling, we always tell
each other everything.

Nothing to tell. Money's
a little bit tight everywhere.

The bank's all right.

Here's to us.

But mud in your grandfather's eye.

Luck to you, Bill.

Is that the only record
in the house?

The only one I like.

- Ann about ready?
- She'll be here any minute.

You didn't tell her, did you?

You think I go around blabbering
everything I know?

Good, I'm starved.

Appetite's returning, hm?

Don't tell me your boyfriend Gage
finally came to the phone.

Uh-uh, still holds out.

No matter what name I give.

If I tried for two weeks to get
a man on the phone...

...and he wouldn't talk, I'd begin
to suspect he didn't like me.

- I guess I'm a diehard.
- Ehh!

Say, is that the best dinner
gown you have?

What?

Listen, ducky, you're getting
a bit particular, aren't you,

- ...for a quiet family dinner?
- But I like my women dressed.

I wonder.

Mr. Gage is downstairs, sir.

- Gage?
- Bring him right up.

Bill...

I'm going to give him a little
case to handle.

Oh, bartender, you're marvelous.

- She's a beautiful thing.
- I'm glad you like her, Mr. Gage.

But I imagine she'd be pretty
expensive to maintain.

Yes, but I get a lot of fun
out of them.

- You're going to name her Ann III, eh?
- Hm-hmm.

Well, she looks like a winner to me.

I'm counting on it to win
the race Narragansett Race.

Do you realize coffee's been waiting
downstairs for one hour?

- And so have I.
- Sorry, Ann, I thought Granny was with you.

You knew Gran had a bridge
date at Rita's.

I've just ordered fresh coffee,
so if you boys will stop playing house.

- Be with you in a minute.
- On no, you don't!

You two have been gabbing ever since
we sat down at dinner.

It's my turn. Come on, I'm sick of
talking to myself.

And this was Michael, the best
dog I ever had.

Swell-looking hound.

Greatest hunting instinct
I've ever known.

- Still got him.
- No. Run over.

A year ago.

- Gee, that was tough.
- Sure was.

I loved that mutt.

Ann, have you read any
good books lately?

Yes, Gran, I read a swell book.

About a girl who kills her father.

Say, come over and see these,
they're great.

No thanks, I was brought up on them.

Look here, I've just got
to show you this.

Are you interested in turkeys?

We used to raise on our farm
up in Maine when I was a kid.

You did? That's a coincidence.

- I raised them up at Holtstown.
- Holtstown?

Yes, a small town upstate.

Only place where I'm a happy man.

I've got a nice little farm up there.
I'd like to show it to you sometime.

I'd like to see it.

This gobbler took first at the
Agricultural Show.

- That's an American Bronze, isn't it?
- Right! Say, you know turkeys!

I wish somebody would talk
turkey to me.

That's not right.
Move over.

Ah, surrender.

After that run, it goes into an
augmented fifth. Here, like this.

Is there anything he doesn't know?

Say, why don't you two get married?

I guess I'd better be going.
It's after two.

No, don't go.
You stay here.

I'm off to bed.

- Good night, smudge.
- Don't hurry yourself.

- Oh, I didn't realize that...
Oh, shut up!

Good night. Nice to have
met you, Gage.

Thanks. Don't forget we're
lunching together tomorrow.

- Right. Good night, Ann.
- Good night.

Stupid.

Good luck.

He's a grand person.

I'm glad you like your future
father-in-law.

- You're starting that again, are you?
- Hm-hmm.

There's only one reason why
you shouldn't marry me.

That's if you don't love me.

Tell me that, Tony, and I'll drop
my shameless pursuit.

All right, I love you.

But there are a dozen good reasons
why I won't marry you.

Why, sir, you're not suggesting
anything else.

Oh, good heavens!

You can't meet every situation
in life with a wisecrack.

I don't want to love you.

Our marriage would mean nothing
but unhappiness for both of us.

- Go on.
- Don't you see, Ann, I haven't a cent.

Money means nothing to me.

You'd have to adjust yourself to my
way of living or you'd try to change me.

Either way, one of us would break
the other's spirit.

I'm listening.

Don't you know if I thought there
was the slightest chance...

...to make you happy, I'd go for it?

I'm mad about you. But I am not going
to lose what little sanity I've got left.

- Yes, Tony.
- I've got a rotten temper.

I'd forget that you're a spoiled
baby and get angry.

You live in a world of toys
and I'd bust every one of them.

- Don't you see, Ann?
- Those things don't matter.

Why,

I hardly make enough to keep
you in orchids.

Then there'll be no more orchids.

I love you, Tony.

Not one cent, unless he comes
to me himself!

But Mr. Cedric, the situation
is desperate.

Humph! Of course it's desperate.

He's caught, the fool!

He never should have been
president of any bank.

I know how he's been bungling
the whole job.

Making loans on worthless collateral,
and other idiocies.

And he sends you to do the begging.

He doesn't even know
that I'm here.

In fact, he was against
approaching you.

Oh, he was, eh?

Too pig-headed to admit
he's licked, eh?

Well, until he does,

Good day, Mr. Burkhardt.

I should like to leave a statement of our
assets in case you change your mind.

Assets, what assets?
You haven't got any!

You people must have been
out of your minds...

...to stand by and let him get
the bank get in this condition.

- It isn't worth a cent.
- But the man is your own son-in-law.

That's no asset to him either!

Let him crawl for the money!

Tell him that from me.

Good day, Mr. Burkhardt.

Oh, hello!

Well, how do you do, Miss Ann?

I hear you had a wonderful trip.

Yes, perfectly.
Grandfather all right?

Oh, indeed yes.

- He's holding his own remarkably.
- Oh.

Well, um... I'll be getting along.

Your grandfather's expecting you,
Miss Ann.

- How are you, Holmes?
- Oh, very well, thank you.

- Hello, darling!
- Ann, my dear!

Oh, I'm glad to see you.

Sit down here.

You look marvelous. The Springs must
have agreed with you.

Oh, the Springs!
I was anxious to get back to you.

Now, tell me everything.

Were you satisfied with all
the... arrangements?

They were grand, darling. But then,
you've always spoiled me.

Nothing's too good for my
granddaughter.

And the prince?
Were you pleased with him?

Oh, yes, the prince.
He's charming.

Grandfather...

It'll be a royal match.

On both sides, mind you.

Grandfather, there's something
I've got to tell you.

Please don't be angry with me.

But I can't marry Carlos.

- Go on.
- I know it's a great disappointment to you.

But I've met someone I really love.

Who is it?

He's connected with your lawyers,
Anthony Gage.

A nobody.

What does that matter, I love him.

The arrangements for this marriage
are made.

It's utterly out of the question
to alter my plans now.

- What about my plans?
- I won't permit it.

Then I'll have to do without
your permission.

Oh, darling. I don't want
to quarrel with you.

You've always been so good to me.

Ann, my dear.

Ever since you were a child
I've planned this future for you.

It's been my life's ambition
to see you where you belong.

But Grandfather, I've never shared
your mania for royalty.

I've financed a revolution...

...to put Carlos on the throne.

That doesn't mean a thing.
All I want to do is be happy.

I will not be disappointed twice.

I arranged a regal match
for your mother.

And I let her get around me with
her talk of happiness.

And what did she do?

- Married a fool, a failure.
- Don't you say that about Bill.

Now let's get this clear.
If you marry that man,

you won't get another cent
of my money.

That's what I came to tell you.
I don't want any more of your money.

And your father won't get
any of it either.

Bill?

- What does he want your money for?
- To keep him out of jail.

Are you crazy?

What are you talking about?

As president of that bank he's responsible
for every dollar deposited in it.

His bungling has wrecked it
and he has to answer for it.

I don't believe it.

Bill never did anything criminal
in his life.

Bunglers never do!

Intentionally.

Bill has plenty of friends. If he needs
the money, he'll raise it somewhere.

He can't raise a cent!

The bank's condition doesn't
warrant a loan.

Everybody knows it's on the rocks.

Burkhardt came to me just now begging
for him and I'm the only one he can turn to.

When shall I cable to the prince
to come over for the wedding?

Any time you like.

- Who is it?
- The laundry.

- Ann!
- Does Mr. Gage live here?

Ann darling, come in.

So this is your house.

Well, of course it can't compare
with the Holt marble halls.

But you might as well see what
you're letting yourself in for.

It's charming.

If I knew you were coming,
I'd have baked a cake.

I'd much rather have a kiss.

- Tony...
- What's the matter, dear?

What's happened? You're all upset
about something.

I came to tell you...

You came to tell me?

I can't keep my date with you tonight.

Whew! You had me scared
for a minute.

- I thought it was something serious.
- I have to see my grandfather.

Well, I suppose we can spare
the old gent one evening.

Considering we'll have all the rest
of our lives together.

- Cold?
- No.

No, I'm all right.

Show me the rest
of your house to me.

My house?
Our house, Mrs. Gage.

On your left, madam, we have the bar.

We've a bigger bar in my house.

Well, you're just a poor little rich girl.

On your right we have the library.

Plenty of books for the long
winter evenings.

- Have you read any of them?
- Oh, yes, I've read one of them.

Let's see, where is that volume?

Here it is.

And this, this is the master bedroom.

Of course it's the only one,
but it's still the master bedroom.

And here, we have a
cedar-lined closet.

And if you think you're going to use
more than half of it, you're crazy.

- So you're mean about closets.
- Hm-hmm.

Ahh...

Oh, there's lost of things you'll
have to get used to.

I beat women who tidied
their own drawers.

I'm awfully good at mussing them up.

The pipery. Heaven help anyone
who disturbs my pipes.

I suppose you knock them out
on the rugs too.

- Hm, good for them.
- That's what Bill always says.

- Anything else?
- I'm a fiend about coffee.

If it isn't strong, I throw things.

Ann! Ann, darling, what is it?

Oh, Tony.

Hey, what's the matter, smudge?
Got the jitters?

Sorry. After all, Bill, four cups.

That's right, criticize your old man.

And I didn't make a single crack
about the time you got in last night.

Four o'clock.
Is that decent?

You shouldn't have been up.

Oh, I heard you as I passed the study,
up and down, up and down.

What's the idea? Trying to wear
a path in the rug?

Can't a man think in his own house?

You shouldn't worry, darling, really.

Who said I was worrying?

Bill, I am.

About what?

Myself. I want you to do
something for me.

Name it, honey.

I want you to tell Tony
I'm not going to marry him.

What?

- I'm going to marry Carlos.
- But I don't understand, Ann.

- What's happened?
- Nothing.

I was just thinking things over.
I don't see how I can back up now.

Back out?
Well, what about Tony?

What about backing out on him?

It's all crazy. I shouldn't have tried
to make things happen.

It just won't work out.

- So, if you'll tell him.
- Well, I...

Ann, honey, if you've had
some silly fight...

There's been no fight. I'm only
trying to be sensible.

Oh, I don't want to talk about it.

- Good morning, Ann.
- Hello.

What's the matter with her?

- Blast if I know.
- Cedric temper, that's what.

All right.

- Come in, Tony!
- Good morning.

- Excuse me for barging in so early.
- Not at all, have some coffee.

No, thanks, I just did.
Is Ann up?

- Well, er... yes.
- Visible?

Well, she was.
Er, have some coffee.

Didn't you hear the man just refuse?

Yes, she's up. Just flew out of here
in a temper about something.

- Temper?
- Ask Bill. I hate mysteries.

Anything wrong with Ann?

I wish I knew.
Maybe you can explain.

- You saw her last night?
- Yes, I did.

Then why is she talking about marrying
that dumb prince this morning?

Your heard it wrong, Bill.
She was talking about me.

As a matter of fact, I just breezed in
to ask you to name the day.

My boy, I hope you're right.
But that's not what she said.

- She asked me to tell you.
- She asked you to tell me?

- If I were you, I'd ask her myself.
- Yeah, I guess I'd better.

Upstairs, first door to the right,
first landing.

Thanks.

Well, she asked me to.

Sit down! Lovers' quarrel,
don't interfere.

- Who is it?
- It's me, Tony.

May I come in?

Ann, darling! Your father has some
crazy idea that you...

No, he hasn't.

But... what's the matter with you?

I've got to tell you I can't marry you.

Say that again.

I can't marry you.

I've decided to marry Carlos.

There's something funny about this.

- What is it?
- I tried to tell you last night.

- That's why I went to your house.
- And instead of telling me, you...

So it was all a fake.

- You don't love me.
- Tony, I do!

Then why this idiotic act?
Why do you say these stupid things?

I can't tell you.
It concerns someone else.

- Who? The prince?
- Oh, no, Tony, no.

I love you more than anything
else in the world.

- But I can't marry you.
- I insist upon knowing why!

You've got to believe I can't tell you.

Well, then maybe I can tell you.

The reason you agreed to your
grandfather's plan in the first place...

...is because you wanted that kind
of marriage.

At first I believed you weren't capable
of anything but phony emotions.

I was right.

I do love you.

I'll admit you put on a great
act last night.

But that wasn't love.
You don't know what it is.

For your own sake, I hope
you never find out.

I know you'll be very happy.

Goodbye.

Now let me see.

Would you kindly revolve, Miss Holt?

- Would you kindly revolve?
- He means turn around.

Perfect! You will be the bride
of the month.

That's something to look forward to.

Now, with this, I see a...

Let me see.

He's going into a trance now.

I see a bouquet of white orchids.

Yes, it could be.

Suppose you take it off.

His Royal Highness is downstairs
and he mustn't be kept waiting.

I've got a little model of my yacht
upstairs if you'd like to see it.

Oh, please, no. I do not like boats.

I'm still feeling the sea from my trip.

Oh, well that's too bad.

Uh... how do you like America?

- It's very large, no?
- Yes, yes.

But I asked you that one
before, didn't I?

- Do you like dogs?
- Dogs?

Yes, dogs, you know,
whoof whoof.

- Dogs.
- Oh.

I'm crazy about them myself.
I've got a kennel up on my farm.

- This is Michael.
- Michael?

Yes, a dog I used to own.

Oh, yes, it is very good.

I don't suppose you care for turkeys.

I do not know. It is not
a country I have visited.

I think I'd better see if Ann is ready.

Oh, please, yes. To a party,
I do not like to be late.

No, they might miss you.

Hm, aren't you looking cheerful.

I've been trying to get somewhere
with that guy but he's got me down.

I'm going crazy trying to figure out
why she's marrying him.

The whole thing's got me stumped.

Don't let it lick you, son.
Maybe you can get something out of her.

You go talk to the prince
awhile, will you?

Not me, I'm going out to get drunk.

But smudge, why should you marry
that stuffed shirt?

I told you. I think it's the
sensible thing to do.

But Ann, honey, it's not like you
to be sensible.

Thanks.

Aw, honey, don't be cross with me.

I've got miseries of my own.

Oh, nothing that I can't handle.

But it would be a lot easier
if I could feel happy about you.

You shouldn't worry, Bill honey.

And if it's about money, why don't
you go see Grandfather?

Why should I go to see him?

Well, he's in a terribly good mood
these days.

He's so delighted about the
wedding and all.

I still don't see what that
has to do with me.

For heaven's sake, will you stop
fiddling that thing?

Sorry.

Ann.

Ann.

There's something definitely
wrong with you.

I want to know what it is.

There's nothing wrong.

- Oh, smudge.
- No, darling, please, I'm in a hurry.

He was a grand guy, that Tony.

I'm sure he still is.

- And your prince.
- Please, Bill, let's drop the subject!

I'm marrying Carlos because
I want to.

And I want you to stop worrying me.

Be a good boy and go see Grandfather.

- Yes, sir?
- Double old-fashioned.

- Very well, sir.
- Make it two.

- Yes, madam.
- Why, Mrs. Holt!

This is one of my joints also.
Surprised to see me?

And delighted.
Do sit down.

Don't have to ask me twice.

- How have you been?
- Splendid, thanks.

You look miserable.

Oh, don't get sore.
I'm miserable too.

So's Bill. We're all miserable.

Sorry to hear that.

Good.

Just what I need.

Bring me the bottle.

Very well, madam.

Well, sorry I can't stay in and get
under the table with you.

I'm going to a cocktail party at Rita's.

Hm, Rita's... Sounds promising.

- Hey?
- I'll join you.

We can get under the table there.

Good!

And may the royal nurseries flourish.

Bravo, Dick!

I now call on the groom-to-be to respond.

Speech!
Speech, come on!

- Please, I do not know what to say.
- You can't get away with that.

Well, um... Must I?

Go ahead, it's no worse than reviewing
troups or christening battleships.

We are very greatful to you for all
your so good wishes.

And for them we thank you very much.

- Bravo!
- Very nice, too.

Now it's your turn, Ann.

Oh no, Dick, let's relax now,
come on.

- Uh-uh, we'll have none of that.
- We want Ann!

- We want Ann!
- We will now have a few words...

...from the chairman of the Elks Convention,
our Miss Holt.

- Oh!
- So you won't talk, huh?

- On the table!
- Serge, no!

Friends and fellow workers,

the church bazaar will be held in the school
auditorium next Sunday evening.

And there will be a recitation by
Mr. Buttington entitled...

"Short sheets make the night
seem longer."

Which, my dear friends, reminds me
of the happiest day of my life.

And...

Tony!
So glad you got here.

So am I, even if it is a surprise
party for me.

- Rita loves surprising people.
- Yes, don't I, dear?

- I want you to meet the prince.
- I'd love to.

Hm, Rita's always horning in
on my men.

Oh, please, can I get you anything?

I'm all right now, really.
I just felt dizzy for a moment.

Oh, I understand. The excitement.

- Yes, that was it.
- Well, shall we go in and dance now?

Just a moment longer, do you mind?

- Oh, Ann.
- Excuse me. You wait here for me.

I'll never forgive you for this.

But darling, don't be a dog
in the manger.

- You can't commit bigamy, you know.
- You needn't have asked him here.

But dear, I've been seeing
a lot of him.

I couldn't give a party without
asking Tony.

And I'm sure he doesn't mind.

- Oh, Tony!
- Yes?

- They're out here, darling.
- Darling, aren't we having fun?

Prince Carlos, may I present Mr. Gage?

- How do you do?
- It is a pleasure.

Tony felt that he must
congratulate you.

Thank you very much.

I congratulated Ann the last time
I saw her.

I want to dance.
I want to dance with the prince.

- Who me?
- Yes, with you. Come on, pick up your feet.

Pardon me.

Let's all go and dance.
Come on, Tony.

If I'm not mistaken, I have a dance
to finish with Ann.

Oh... pardon me.

- Why can't you?
- I have not learned it.

You take him, Rita. He says
he can't rumba.

May I have the pleasure?

If you insist.

- This tune is familiar.
- Yes, it's very popular.

Charming fellow, isn't he?

I mean, the prince.

- Yes, he is.
- Looks rather stupid.

- But so do Russian wolfhounds.
- I don't get the connection.

Overbred.

I suppose you're terribly excited at the
prospect of becoming a princess.

Yes, I am.

I understand these royal weddings
are very long and exhausting.

You'd better wear comfortable old shoes.

Thanks for the tip.

I had an aunt who was presented
at court.

She said you must be sure
and bring an air cushion.

I'll make a note of it.

I'll send you one as a
wedding present.

Thank you.

It'll be nice too for the prince too
when he discovers...

...that you already know
the facts of life.

So naturally she agreed.

Do you think I'll let her make
this crazy sacrifice for me?

You want her to be happy, eh?

You want her to marry this Gage.

The day that happens will see your
arrest and public disgrace.

How happy will she be then?

You can't do this to her!
I won't let you!

You want me to beg for the money.

All right, I'll eat dirt if that
will satisfy you.

You won't have to.

You'll have all the help
you need, and more,

as a present from me...

...the day she marries Prince Carlos.

I'll get the money somewhere else!

Oh no, you won't.
I've seen to that.

I'd like to...

I'll lick you on this, Cedric,

if it's the last thing I do.

I wish we could, Bill,
but it's impossible.

- I understand.
- Why don't you go to Cedric?

You got us into this jam, Bill,
and you've got to get us out!

- What do you think I'm trying to do?
- He's right!

You've got to go to Cedric.

I've pulled every wire, but the board
can't do a thing.

I'm sorry you had to come all the way
to Washington to be turned down, Bill.

You'd better go to Jerome Cedric.

You've got to go to Cedric.

What's the matter with you?

Fly back tonight.

And lay off this stuff
or you'll crash.

That might solve a lot of things.

- What?
- Ann could marry the man she wants,

the bank's got me covered
for enough to carry on,

and she'd never know the mess
I've made of things.

Oh, don't talk drivel.

You've got to see Cedric,
that's the solution.

I've got the solution.

Why are you going back
to Washington tonight?

Business, honey.

Then you won't be here for my
wedding tomorrow.

Oh, I'll be at your wedding alright.

Bill, you're tight. How can you be in
Washington and New York at the same time?

Look at the things Houdini could do.

Another thing. Why are we going
up to the farm?

- You can't fly from there.
- Who says I can't?

I had one of the boys fly
my plane up.

You can drive me over to the field later.

I still can't understand why
we came up here.

Seems to me you might go places
with your old man...

...on your last night of freedom
without asking questions.

After all these years and you're
turning whimsy on me.

That's it. Little Peter Pan,
that's me.

Remember the day you were swinging on
the gate and fell and skinned your knee?

Sure, and I yelled like the devil.

And I gave you my watch
to set you up?

And I threw it at you and Gran
spanked me?

- And I balled out Gran?
- And Gran won as usual.

Oh, smudge.

Bill, what's the matter with you?

Can't a fellow get a little sentimental when
he's saying goodbye to his old pal...

...for good?

Bill!

Well, it's your fault if you marry a prince
and put the Atlantic between us.

Come on.

Bet you've forgotten the time
I measured you.

Oh, no. I stood right here
on this bench.

Where is it?

- Here it is.
- Wait, I've got my lighter.

Looks like an epitaph.

Bill, why don't you get another
dog like Michael?

No other dog could be like Michael.

You can't go back and do
things over, smudge.

Not in this life.

Now you're turning philosophical on me.

- I'm finding out a lot about you tonight.
- Are you, honey?

Finding out that I'm not such
a bad egg after all, eh?

- Bill, there are lights in the house.
- Yes.

What is this?

Well, it's a sort of wedding
present for you.

Picked out to please the prince
and your grandfather.

Especially your grandfather.

I can hardly wait.

Gran, so you're up here too!

May I present Mr. Gage?

- How are you?
- Very well, thank you.

Hello, Bill.

Bill, what's this all about?

Well, it won't take me a minute to tell you
because I'm expecting Judge Tewilliger.

Judge Tewilliger is the Holtstown
justice of the peace.

Once there was a dumb guy
named Bill...

...who had a daughter named Ann,

who thought the only way to save him from
a terrible jam was to marry a dumb guy...

Named Carlos.

...although she was in love with
a swell guy named Tony.

But the daughter named Ann
was wrong about Bill,

because he didn't need any help
from the mean guy.

Named Cedric.

Because he got it somewhere else.

- Bill, honest?
- Honest.

When I saw how that grandparent
of yours had you buffaloed,

I went down to Washington,
and believe me, honey,

I'm getting all the money I need.

Oh, Bill darling, it's wonderful.

- I've been so unhappy.
- Everything's in shape now.

Just the way I wanted.

But I've got to fly back to Washington
tonight to close the deal.

So it seems to me the best thing
for all dumb parties concerned...

Let me finish.

Ann... will you?

Will I what?

You know what.

And that will be Judge Tewilliger.

By virtue of the power conferred
upon me,

I now pronounce you husband and wife.

What? Married?

Yes, I wanted to be the first
to congratulate you.

Now you know what you can do
with your prince.

And you know what I can do with you!

You will hear from me tomorrow.

Well, er... it'll be a little difficult
to get in touch with me...

...tomorrow.

What are you up to?

To victory, Mom!

Nice to see you're your old
self again, son.

Gee, Mom, you've been swell to me.

What else could I be?

You don't think I'm a total
washout, do you?

You noodle, what's eating you?

I guess playing the heavy father
has got me down.

You coming to the flying field with me?

Playing the heavy grandma's got me down

so, if you don't mind, I'll take
my bones to bed.

That's right.

Sleep tight.

Goodbye.

- You mean good night.
- Sure, that's what I mean.

Good night.

You be good to her, Tony, eh?

Oh, I promise not to break her neck
more then once a week.

Goodbye, Billy boy, be good.

I know you're going to be happy.
And that's all that matters to me.

Sweet.

- Love me, baby?
- What do you think?

You're the best kid a man ever had.

Goodbye.

Hey, Cap, how's the new road
from here?

Well, pretty rough going
at the beginning, miss,

but after that it's clear sailing.

Thanks.

Subtitles: Lu?s Filipe Bernardes