Necessary Roughness (1991) - full transcript

Blue 32.
Blue 32.

Set!

Hut! Hut!

Hut! Hut!

Blue 32.

Blue 32.

Set!

Hut! Hut!

Blue 32.

Set!

Hut! Hut!



All right!

Hut! Hut!

Yeah!

(AUDIENCE CHEERING)

ANNOUNCER: (ON TV)
And it's a touchdown!

TSU wins its third
national championship.

From champs to chumps.

Just six months ago,
the Texas State
Fighting Armadillos

were billed as
the greatest college
football team in history.

And now they are history.

Yesterday, the commission
slapped Texas State

with a staggering list
of infractions

including
recruiting violations,

steroid abuse,
illegal payments to players



and of course,
grade tampering.

The way
these guys are going,
their yearbook photos

will be used
as mug shots.

Joining us tonight as
our guest commentator,

the legendary Ed
"Straight Arrow" Gennero.

The man who once threw
five All-Americans

off his football team for
taking money from boosters,

but still won
the Cotton Bowl.

Thanks for joining
us tonight, Coach.
Good to be here, Chris.

Coach,
what's the latest
on the Armadillos?

Well, Chris, the penalty
had it down to Texas State

will set an example
for the future
of college football.

BERMAN: What happens
to the players?

Well, all the players
from the old team
have been expelled,

and all the coaches
have been fired.

BERMAN: Where will they
get their new players?

GENNERO: The new players
must be real students.

No more scholarships,
no more monkey business,

no more special favors,
or else no more football.

DIRECTOR: Cut it!
(BELL RINGING)

Mr. Gennero?

Carver Purcell,
president of Texas State.

I know who you are.
We were just talking
about you.

What can I do for you?

Well, the commission
came down
pretty hard on us,

and we've been taking
a lot of heat in the press,
and I thought may be...

Now, wait a minute.

If you're here to ask me
to go easy on you...

Ed...

I'm here to offer you
the head coaching job
at Texas State.

MAN: Nice show, Ed.
Thank you.

No, I'm finished
with football.

Look, I'm talking about
total control.

No pressure to win.

Just run a clean program
like you've always wanted.

Last time I did that,
they fired me.
Hey...

The boosters
fired you, Ed.

We don't have
boosters anymore.

The truth is,
we need the kind of man

who'll bounce
an All-American
if he takes money.

No, you don't need me,
you need an image.

That's what you...
I'm offering the opportunity
to show the world

that this can be done...
You know, your way.

PURCELL:
Think about it.

COACH RIG:
Get used to it!

This may be
the biggest crowd
we draw all year!

(CHUCKLING)

From the Cotton Bowl
to the dustbowl.

I got to be out of
my cotton-picking mind
to let you talk me into this.

Building a team from
an actual student body?

Mass suicide.
Good to see you,
Wally.

Yeah.
Come on.

I thought
you'd be pleased.

The two of us
working together again.

Why the hell
should I be pleased?

I had an offer
to coach my own team.

Coaching high school
football in London
doesn't count, Wally.

It was a good deal.

Besides I only
had to teach one
personal hygiene class.

Which is something
you know nothing about.

By the way,
I understand
you're off the sauce.

Don't change
the subject.

I shouldn't be
second banana to
anybody, including you.

I'll give you
a free hand.
No crossovers.

You stick to defense.
Offense is mine.

Oh, yeah.
You're the big "O,"
I'm the little "D."

Don't start with me,
Wally.
Yeah.

RIG: You know the
trouble with you is?

You keep things
bottled up.
That's not healthy.

Me, if I've got
something on
my mind, I say it.

GENNERO: Sometimes
it's best just to keep
your mouth shut.

RIG: Yeah.

I suppose
I should learn
to dress nice...

Kiss ass.

At least I'm not
taking nitro pills
like they're breath mints.

I don't suppose
you told Purcell
about that, huh?

Well, he didn't ask.

It's good
to be back, huh?

So, what do you say?

Equal partners?

Ed... Thanks.

No, no shit.
Thanks.
It's all right.

(BELL CHIMING)
(PEOPLE CHATTING INDISTINCTLY)

(MICROPHONE FEEDBACK)

NEIDERMAN: (ON SPEAKER)
Hey, Armadillo fans,
this is Chuck Neiderman,

the voice of
the Fighting Armadillo.

This season,
your football team

needs more
than your support,

so if any of you listeners
can punt, pass,
block or kick,

then report
to the gymnasium
at 3:00 sharp

for open football
tryouts.

RIG: Way to go!
Climb!

Come on! Come on!
I like the cowboy.

You can have him.

WILKINSON: You guys
call yourselves
Armadillos?

Move it, you sorry-ass
buckets of quivering
civilian slime!

Screw you!

Sir!

They didn't have
this many deserters
in the Republican Guard.

Son, are you all
that you can be?

Sir, yes, sir!

Well, it's
a little too much.

Sir, yes, sir.

Move it.
Sir, yes, sir!

(BLOWING WHISTLE)

RIG: All right, all right,
all right, all right.

Whoa!

Look at that kid.

Got the heart
of a lion.

And the legs
of a chicken.

GENNERO: That's
Charlie Banks.

The only player on
last year's team that
survived the purge.

He was a walk-on.

Never got a minute
of playing time, even got
left off the roster.

GENNERO: Just one thing
I like about him.

RIG: What's that?

GENNERO:
He wouldn't quit.
(WHISTLE BLOWING)

Just what we need.

All right, let's go!

Set!

Hut!

GENNERO: All right, Papke.

Show me the arm, son.

Throw the ball,
genius.

Come on.

You ready, Wyatt?
Ready to go.

Set! Hut!

(GRUNTING)

Sorry, Wyatt.
I'll get it there
next time.

Good route.
Good route.

All right, relax, son.
Try it again.

Set! Hut!

I thought you were
gonna do one of these.

How about that?
He stinks at two sports.

I can work with him.

Just butt out
of my offense,
will you, Wally?

If you think you can
build an offense
around a guy

who throws like
Edward Scissorhands,

we're gonna play
a hell of a lot
of defense.

(COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING
ON CAR STEREO)

(CATTLE MOOING)

(PEOPLE TALKING INDISTINCTLY)

Paul Blake!

RIG: I'm looking
for Paul Blake.

Hey! Come on, come on.

(MAN TALKING INDISTINCTLY)

Guess you don't
remember me.

Yeah, I remember you.
Coach Riggendorf.

(SPEAKING SPANISH)

RIG: Well,
what do you know?

I guess I made
a decent impression on you.

Yeah, you were out here

sixteen years ago
recruiting for Penn State.

Can we mosey on
over to the bunkhouse?

How's the magic arm?

Thirty-four years old.

Haven't thrown
a football in years.

That's good.
Then it's rested.
(SCOFFS)

Do you realize
you never enrolled
in college,

so you can still
play as a freshman?

Could have saved you
a 200-mile trip, Coach.

Blake, I know why
you passed up
on college.

Yeah, well,
that all happened
a long time ago.

Aren't you the least bit
curious about what
you missed out on?

I made my
peace with it.

I don't need
to drag it all back.

Hey...

I'm not asking you to
give up the Ponderosa.

All I'm asking you to do
is come out for the team.

Team?
Yeah.

You don't have
a team, Coach.

Hell, you're dragging
kids off the street

and throwing them
to the wolves.

You expect me
to come back

and get the shit
kicked out of me?

What the hell's
that going to prove?

Maybe you're right.

Maybe you
should stay here

with all your
high school trophies

and wonder
just how great
you might have been.

But I'll tell you
one thing.

I never saw anybody
fire that football
the way you did.

PURCELL: I can't run
interference for you
on this, Ed.

Dean Elias
calls the shots
on education.

You might consider
kissing his ass a little.

Well, I'd hate
to lead him on.

I'm an old-fashioned dean,
Coach Gennero.

Call me stodgy, priggish,
a stick in the mud,
if you will,

but I believe
that the function
of the university

is to educate
and enlighten.
GENNERO: Oh, so do I.

I couldn't
agree with you more.

As a matter of fact,
I think you should
be congratulated

for having that other
team thrown out of here.

Well, thank you.

I hope I won't
have to do it again.

GENNERO:
I'm sure you won't.

Any member of my team
who doesn't make
the grade academically

simply won't play,
that's all.

Now that we've
got that settled,
let's have lunch.

ELIAS: One moment
please, Carver.

Let me be straight,
Coach Gennero.

I've always
opposed this
or any other school

squandering its
limited resources

on a mind-numbing
sport that encourages

corruption
and barbarism.

Well, then, I guess I won't
be putting you down for
season tickets then, huh?

(CHUCKLING)

ELIAS: He's funny,
Carver.

I like jokes.

So now maybe
we can have lunch.

Uh, no, I'm busy.

I'm on a diet...
And busy.

All right.

Coach.

Dean.

This is going to
work out just fine.

MAN: Ready... Begin!

ALL: One, two, three, four.

One, two, three, four.

One, two, three, four.

One, two, three, four.

One, two, three, four.

Hut!

Go.

RIG: All right.
Good hit.

Jog it back!
Come on!

(GRUNTING)

They're always
shouting.

Dean Elias,
for someone
who hates football,

you spend a lot of time
watching the sport.

Eternal vigilance
is the price
of integrity,

Coach Gennero.

What an asshole.

Like that move,
Coach?

Keep working, Edison,
keep working.

Edison? Any relation
to the guy who
made the light bulb?

No. Bigger,
as in Edison library,

Edison Stadium,

Edison Avenue.

His old man?
You got it.

Dean Elias...

Your office said
I'd find you here.

My registration.

You done with this?
Yes. Thank you.

I was...

Well, try that
play again, son.
Okay.

GENNERO: Wally, did you
hire an assistant coach
without telling me?

No. I got
your quarterback
without telling you.

Wally... Well, I hope
he gets younger
as he gets closer.

Just give it a look,
will you, please?

Blake,
tattoo somebody!

Hey, over here.

(GRUNTING)
(CHUCKLING)
All right!

Mmm.

(ELEVATOR DINGS)
(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)

(GIRL LAUGHING)

Excuse me.
Excuse me.

Hey, is 209 west
this way?

Who's your kid?
Maybe I know him.

I'm not looking for my kid.
I'm looking for my room.

Whoa, a 40-year-old
freshman?

Yeah. Maybe he
knew Elvis.

WILKINSON: Discipline
is everything.

SAMURAI: But everything
is nothing.
Aw, bullshit!

Oh!

Wells Fargo
coming through.

(KNOCKING)
MANUMANA: Come in.

(STRAINING)

Hi.

We'll miss it.
Let's go.

Hi.

Paul Blake.

Looks like
we're going to
be roommates.

Laikai Manumana.

Yeah, well,
Laikai Manumana
to you, too.

No, Mr. Blake.
That's my name.

I'm from Samoa,
the big island.

I'm called Manumana.

It means "runt
of the litter."

The other men
in my family
are very large.

Uh-huh.

Well, uh...

Excuse me.

Can I get you
anything?

Another pillow?
A cup of
Samoan tea?

Maybe something
comfortable to wear?

What's with
all the attention?

Where I come from,
Mr. Blake,

we're taught
to respect our elders.
Yeah?

Well,
I'm not that eld,
all right?

(GRUNTING)

Thank you.
Sure.

RIG: (GROANING)
Oh, God!

Get out of there!
Get up!
Get out of there!

Come on!
Damn!

Hut! Hut!

RIG: Oh, man!

GENNERO:
Featherstone?

Are you the gentleman
who ran the hurdles
in 13.2?

Thirteen flat, sir.
Excuse me.

Would you go long,
fly a pattern right,
please?

Thank you.

Set...

Hut! Hut!

Hut!

Hut, hut!

Come on!

Keep your eyes
on the ball, son!

RIG: While you're at it,
keep your hands
on the ball.

Featherstone, come on
once again, try again.

Come on!

Set... Hut! Hut!

(GRUNTING)

(GRUNTING)

All right, try again!
That's all right, son!

Keep trying.
Just keep your eyes
on the ball!

Damn it!

Again!

(GROANING)

Again!

Hut!

(GRUNTING)

Good. Better.
That's better.

(HUFFS)

What the hell
is it, Samurai?

You got a problem?

My master said that
football is not just
a game of smashing heads.

It is a contest to control
and occupy territory.

No shit?

My master says,
"Put your money
where your mouth is."

All right!

Down!

Set!

Hut, hut!

(GRUNTING)

(YELLS)

Works for me.

(PANTING)

GENNERO: What's the
story, Wally?

RIG: Well, I think
he could have been
the greatest.

I saw him pass
for five touchdowns

in a Texas High School
championship game.

I had him all set
to dump SC and
go to Penn State.

So then what happened?

His father died.

He never
thought twice.

He gave it all up
to run the family
business.

He missed college.

He missed
everything.

(BREATHING HEAVILY)

Oh, God,
I'm sorry.

You okay?

No. Actually, I was
just hit in the head
by a racquetball.

Could I have my ball?

Oh, yeah.

Thanks.

10-8.

I'm really sorry
I hit you.

(STUTTERING)
Oh, it... It's okay.

I, uh...

(GROANING)
Ah, one tip,

never let these kids
see you're hurting.

Yeah, I know.
They smell liniment,

and they're on you
like a pack of wild dogs.

A freshman
called me "ma'am"
this morning.

I wanted
to smack him.
(CHUCKLING)

I know what you mean.

Well, I'm glad
you're okay.

Yeah! Oh, yeah.
No, I'm...

Are you in a hurry?

Um...

Yeah. Teaching
four classes tomorrow.

What department
are you in?

Athletics.

Well, we'll probably
run into each other
at the faculty mixer.

Probably.

(CLEARING THROAT)

Okay.
I'll see you around.

I'll need McKenzie
at flanker,

and I want
the two twins.

No, no. No way.
Not the twins.

They're the only two guys
who like each other
without being suspect.

(CHUCKLING)
Oh, come on.

They have to protect
your aging quarterback.

GENNERO:
I'll give you Granger.
RIG: Granger?

ELIAS:
No, you won't.

Oh, hello, Dean.

Jesus. Even a rattlesnake
gives you some warning.

It's all right. Uh...

What's wrong
with Granger?

Incomplete
summer school.

You know the rule,
no pass, no play.

Well, that shouldn't
be a problem.

I mean, we'll take it
to the board of appeals
and he can do a make-up.

Absolutely.
The appeals board
is the way to go.

They meet in July.

Or is it
every other July?

Well... At any rate,

I'm sure you wouldn't
want to circumvent
the rules,

Mr. Straight Arrow.

Sorry, Wally,
you just lost Granger.

ELIAS:
I'm sorry, too, Wally.

Wally, right?

You can call me
Walter.

And while
we're at it...

"Florentine,
Pasarelli, Prescott,
Risdon, Marks..."

Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
All of them?

As of this morning.

Grade point average
is too low.

How the hell
do you expect us
to field a team?

I don't.

Well, that's a quick end
to a season.

(SCOFFS)
You don't have
enough offense,

and I don't have
enough guys for defense.

Wally...
Hmm?

We do if we play
both ways.

(CHUCKLING)
Are you kidding?

Iron-man football with
this bunch of daisies?
Come on!

You're taking
too many pills.

(GRUNTING)

You okay?

Set...

Hut! Hut!
(BLOWING WHISTLE)

RIG: (CLEARING THROAT)
Hold it.

Where are
your pads,
McKenzie?

Oh, no pads
for me, Coach.

In Australian rules,
the only people
that wear pads

are the ref
and the spectators.
Trust me.

All right, I'll respect
your wishes, son,

but you're gonna
have to take
responsibility, all right?

Right.

Set... Hut!

(GRUNTING)

(GRUNTING)

Oh, McKenzie!

Check him out.

PLAYER: He's still
breathing.

GENNERO: Some room,
some room, some room,
guys. Is he all right?

How do you like that?

RIG: He held on
to the ball.

When he wakes up,
get him some pads.

I don't know, Ed.

Pads could hurt
his game.

(PANTING)

Excuse me?

Um, are the lectures
going to cover
everything,

or will there be
outside reading?

How should I know?

Well, aren't you
the professor?

No, no, no, sweetheart.
That's not the prof.

That's the bloody
quarterback.
(ALL LAUGHING)

Excuse me.

You don't teach
athletics?

BLAKE: I don't think
I ever actually used
the word "teach."

Fine. Have
a seat, Mr...

Blake.

Paul Blake.

(WHISPERING)

Good morning,
Mr. Blake.
Morning, Mr. Blake.

(ALL CHUCKLING)

Good morning.

CARTER: Some of you may be
under the impression

that this is
a coaster's class.

Well, if you're
looking to coast,
you're in the wrong room.

But on the other hand...
(WHISPERING)
It's okay.

If you're really
interested in journalism

and you have any problems
with my class,

just come to me.
I'm here to help you.

Okay?

This is Journalism 101.

Suzanne.

Suzanne.

Dr. Carter, please.

Look.

I didn't mean
to mislead you yesterday.

Well, yes, I did.

It's just that...

You were embarrassed.
Yeah.

Let's get one thing
straight, Mr. Blake.

Paul.
(SIGHING)

I think it's admirable,
Mr. Blake,

that a man your age
has the courage

to come back to school
to offer your body up
to the football gods,

but I don't give
special treatment
to football players,

so wear a helmet,
try to save a few
brain cells for my class.

I guess this is
a bad time
to ask you out?

You wanted to see me,
Dean Elias?
I have a class.

Yes, I know. Actually,
that's why I wanted
to see you.

Please, have a seat.

It's about you
taking over
Journalism 101.

I just thought
you'd like to know
that last year,

the jocks nicknamed it
"schmooze the news."

They thought it was
something of
a pushover course.

I wondered why so many
guys named "Bubba"
signed up for journalism.

Ha ha.
Don't worry.

I don't give
free rides, Dean Elias.

Phillip.

And I don't give
free rides, either.

Hold all calls.

You know...

You're one of our very
special people here
at TSU.

No, I mean that.
Harvard,
the Washington Post.

Yet still you
chose to come
back here to me.

Us. I meant
to say us.

That's why I know you
wouldn't do anything
to disappoint someone

who sees so much
future in you... Suzanne.

Well, that's very nice.

Yes, I know.

But, you see,
sometimes I can be
quite nice.

I am so late.
Would you
excuse me?

That's why
even in these
past few days...

Something
of a kinship.
(DOOR CLOSING)

And I know
you feel it, too.

KRIMM: All right.
This thing about
to happen here...

Now, this is
really funky.

But if you think
that's cool, you got to
check out a supernova.

That's when you have
a violent explosion

that jacks up
a star's luminosity
up to about

10 to the 45th power joules.

When that happens,
I suggest cop some shade.

Now, I know what
some of you
are thinking right now.

"Mr. Krimm, will this
help me get a job
when I graduate?"

No. But they made me
watch this as a freshman,
so now you must watch it.

(CHUCKLING)

All right, everybody,
class over. Get out.

Next time,
chapter eight,
on gravitation.

Mr. Paul Blake.
Arm of the
Armadillos, man.

I've been reading
about you.
Yeah?

Now, what is
your interest in
celestial mechanics?

It was either this
or home ec.

(CHUCKLING) Oh,
so you took the
easy way out, huh?

On the farm, you know,
you spend a lot of nights
staring up at the sky.

What were you doing?
Praying for rain?

Something like that.
(LAUGHING)

There was
an Andre Krimm.

Played tackle,
Lincoln High.
Oh, man.

All-state.
Big ugly guy.
(LAUGHING)

Bringing back some
old memories, man.

I guess you want
the story now, right?

All right. I got
a scholarship here
to play football

and major in chemistry.

But the coach
didn't see it that way.

"Hell, son, I didn't
bring you here to be
no chemistry professor.

"Now why don't you just
take some basket-weaving
and kick some butt."

Doesn't look like
you dropped chemistry.

No.
I don't regret it.

Got my BS
in five semesters,

my master's in one
year, and I'm
halfway to my PhD.

I'm not trying
to brag or anything.

Oh, no, no. It didn't
sound like bragging...
Too much.

(CHUCKLING)
Just a little bit.

You got a year
of eligibility
left, right?

For football?
Oh! Get out of town.

Tell me you
don't miss it.
(STAMMERING)

Tell me you
don't miss it.
Stand here and tell me that.

All right,
I miss some parts.
Okay.

You guys really going
to try to go both ways
this year?

Well, that's
the plan, yeah.

Look, uh,
Andre,

we really need you.

Man, it's been
a long time

since I really got
a chance to
kick some butt.

(CHUCKLING)
See you in class.

RIG: Okay, Banks!
Ready... Hut!

Come on, Banks!

You're supposed
to be hitting
the sled,

not humping
a butterfly!

I want you mean!
I want you nasty!

I want you
to eat raw meat!

Get your ass
out of here!

All right, next!

Hut!

(GRUNTING)

Andre does not eat
raw meat...

Because Andre
is a vegetarian.

Eat whatever the hell
you want, Andre.

NEIDERMAN:
Hi, sports fans.

Chuck Neiderman here
to bring you
exclusive coverage

of today's opening game
on our closed-circuit
campus radio network.

The Armadillos
are getting ready

to kick off
their 10-game season
this afternoon.

I'm all alone
here in the booth,

thanks to the
broadcast blackout.

The rest of the nation's
press is gonna miss out on
one hell of a game.

Or at least
a noble effort.

(CLOCK TICKING)

(CHATTING INDISTINCTLY)

MAN: Have a good game.

(CLANKING)

(HISSING)

(CRACKING)

(CROWD CHEERING
IN THE DISTANCE)

(BAND PLAYING)

NEIDERMAN: Here comes
the Southwest
Texas Bobcats.

(ALL SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY)

The Bobcats came here
with a traveling squad
of 119 players,

and over 14,000 faithful
Bobcat fans drove up here

in their Winnebagos,
pickups, and Astro vans.

And now,
here are all 17

of your new Texas State
Fighting Armadillos.

(CHEERING)

PLAYER: Okay, guys.
Come on. Let's go.
Come on.

(SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY)

Let's go.
Gather around, guys,
Come on. Let's go.

Come on.

All right, gentlemen.
All right. Listen up.

Just give me 100%,
all right?

PLAYER1: All right!
Just give me 100%.

GENNERO: Now the last time
the Armadillos
took the field,

they won a national
championship,

but they lost
their self-respect.

Now, I want you
to get it back.

(ROARING)

All right.
All right.

Way to go, guys.

Not much of a crowd.

Well, at least we have
the home field advantage.

The Alamo
was the home field.

(GIRL SQUEALING)

ALL: Yeah!
We're number one!

We're number one!
We're number one!

NEIDERMAN: Sargie Wilkerson
takes the ball to five.

He comes around
the right side.

And he's greeted at the 20
by three Bobcats.

Too bad. He only had
eight men left to beat.

All right.
Keep it simple.

Our bread-and-butter
play.

Brown right 22 trap.
All right.

GENNERO: Go ahead.

The Bobcats' defense
is anchored by Sidney
"The Doberman" Harris,

who was All-American
last season in spite
of missing two games

due to, I believe,
rabies shots.

Hey, high school!

(GROWLING)

Ooh! Doggy breath.

Bad doggy. Bad doggy.

Blue 42.

(GROWLING CONTINUES)

Set...

Hut! Hut!

(GROANING)

NEIDERMAN:
Blake's looking to hand off.

He's still looking.
Still looking.

Quarterback keeper.

Now what happened?
Who missed
the assignment?

Everybody missed
the God damn
assignment.

They're perfect.
It's all right...

(GROWLING)

Get the hell
out of there!

Again, run it.

ALL: Bobcats!

Bobcats!

Bobcats!

NEIDERMAN: Armadillos have
second down
on their own 16.

(GRUNTING)

NEIDERMAN:
Well, they run
the ball again,

but they only
lost 2 yards this time.
(BLOWING WHISTLE)

Nice play, guys.

(GROANING)

Third down, coming up.

By the way,
quarterback Paul Blake
is the only Armadillo

who was alive
when the Beatles
were still together.

(CHEERING)

Again.
Well, they
haven't run it yet.

(MEN TALKING INDISTINCTLY)

Okay, guys,
quiet down.

Brown right,
22 trap.

We just ran that.

He's trying
to kill us.

I think they're looking
for that one, soldier.

They haven't
seen it yet.

Why don't we save that
for later, Blake?

All right.
Just settle down.

Settle down!

MAN: All right.

Screw it.

Straight up
pass blocking,
all right?

Fly pattern.

Square in.
Square in.
Got it.

On Two. Ready?
ALL: Break!

NEIDERMAN:
Third and long situation.

Let's see what
the 'Dillos do here.

Freshman Paul Blake
comes to the line.

Blake takes the snap.
He's back to pass!

(GRUNTING)

He goes deep!

He's got a cannon!

What in the hell
is that?

Featherstone has a step.

He's all alone!

He's got...
Oh! In and out
of his hands.

MAN: Damn!

No, no, no, no, no!

He was wide open.
We'll get it.

Blake, sit down.

GENNERO: Papke!
You're going in
for Blake.

I called a running play,
not a pass.

CROWD: (CHANTING)
Defense! Defense! Go, go, go!

NEIDERMAN:
McKenzie back to punt
for the Armadillos.

Oh! Not much
of a hang time.

They may have gotten
a piece of that one.

All right,
send in your defense.

Samurai!

NEIDERMAN: The Armadillos
send in their defense,

consisting of one
Eric "Samurai" Hansen.

The rest of the squad is
playing iron-man football,

playing both offense
and defense.

The Bobcats, however,
have a fresh squad
on the field.

Fifty down!

Fifty down!

Double wing!
Double wing!

Double wing!
Double wing!

Motion left!
Motion left!

I got the motion!
Hey! That's my man!

I got him!
I got him!

NEIDERMAN:
The Armadillos are showing
a lot of respect for Stillman

with quadruple coverage
to the right side.

Moses is wide open.

It's a touchdown!

(CROWD CHEERING)

Blue 45!

Set...

Hut! Hut!

NEIDERMAN:
Papke still in for Blake.

These two have distinctly
different throwing styles.

Blow the whistle!

(BLOWING WHISTLE)

It's all right. It's gonna be
a long day, but it's gonna be
a good one, right?

(GRUNTING)

Ooh!

(CROWD BOOING)

(CHUCKLING)

Boo!

NEIDERMAN: (ON RADIO)
For some reason,
Paul Blake

has not come back
into the game. I'm sure...
(RADIO CLICKING OFF)

All right, just tell
Dean Elias that I had called.
All right? Thank you.

Yeah, and...

GENNERO: I'd appreciate it.
Yes, please.

I'll be here.
Thank you.

How are you, Blake?

You got a second?

Of course, of course.

I think
we ought to talk.

Well, my door's always
open to my players.

Including the ones
you bench?

Even the ones
I had to throw
off my team.

Sit down, Blake.

Look, Coach,
I'll give you everything
I got out there.

That's not enough.

You've got
10 other guys
out there with you.

I need everything
they've got, too.

I want someone
to be their leader
not to leave them behind.

Look, I just want
to play, Coach.

You want me to hand off
all day long, I'll do it.

It's your team.
No, no, no.

I don't want it to
be my team.
It has to be your team.

What are you saying?
You want me to
hang out with them,

be their pal?
What?

No, I can't tell you
how to do that, Blake.

You're going to have to
work that out for yourself.

CARTER: "But the crowd
seemed most taken

"with the bulldogging skills
of local favorite

"handsome
Wyatt Beaudry
of Comanche Gap,

(ALL CHUCKLING)
"who finished eighth
in the steer wrestling event."

(ALL CHUCKLING)

Well, I suppose
that qualifies as a lead
for a news story, Wyatt.

You got in all five Ws,

what, when, where, why,
and especially the who.

MAN: As in who
gives a shit?
(ALL CHUCKLING)

If we could move along...

Ah, the next one
is by Mr. Blake.

"For those who only
read the stat sheets,

"Ed Gennero's
return to coaching

"with the Texas State
Fighting Armadillos

"was marred by
a 65-to-0 shellacking

"by visiting Southwest
Texas Bobcats

"at TSU stadium
on Saturday."

That's a solid opening.

Sure. He had
a great view
from the bench.

(ALL LAUGHING)

CARTER: "But this contest
wasn't about
one football game.

"It was a test
of one man's ideals.

"The Armadillos did
the school proud

"and did that man proud.

"Ed Gennero.

"He won because
they played."

Dean Elias here, Coach.

Tough outing Saturday.
Thought you had them
all the way.

GENNERO: Well, it was
a learning experience, Dean.

The boys just need
a little conditioning.

ELIAS: Ah, conditioning.

You took the words
right out of my mouth.
Perhaps I can help.

How about if I set up
a live scrimmage

with one of the other
state institutions?

GENNERO:
Why, thank you, Dean.

ELIAS: Please, Coach,
please. I'm a giver.

Cheerio.

What do you know
about these guys?

I got a funny
feeling about this.

GENNERO: Don't
worry, Wally.

Dean Elias
assured me that

we're dealing
with real sportsmen.

How do you do?
How do you do?

As loyal Armadillo fans,
my colleagues and I

are pleased to be able
to help you in your
time of need,

and we look forward
to a spirited workout.

Gentlemen, this is
your home field,

so, please,
take the ball.

All right, 'Dillos,
let's get it on!

Yeah!

I'm going to cripple
that pinhead.

Blue 32!

Listen guys,
I want you
to know something.

I believe
you're all innocent.

I really mean that.

I feel a lot of love
on this field today.

(SHRIEKING)

(WHISTLE BLOWING)

(ALL GROANING)

(LAUGHING)

Hey, come on.
You're offside.

You know,
I usually play tennis
instead of football.

(GUNSHOT)

Huh?

Huh?

What are you
in for, anyway?

Computer fraud.

I don't feel so good.

I think I swallowed
a finger.

Yeah!

(SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY)

I got it!
I got it!
Hut! Hut!

(GRUNTING)

(WHISTLE BLOWING)

GENNERO: Wally, come on,
get up, Wally, come on.

People are watching.
Not many, but they're
watching.

If this wasn't a
friggin' astroturf,

I'd dig a grave here
for myself.

The Blakeman pitches
to Sarge.

The Sargester bumps
into his own man.

It's a fumble.
Fumblelaya.

Sarge "Fumbelina" Wilkerson
fumbles the ball.

Keep your head down
and watch the ball.
I'm ready.

Concentrate,
McKenzie.

NEIDERMAN: Looks like
the 0-and-5 Armadillos

may not break
the jinx today.

They're not going to break
into that "W" column.

Now a personal note.

It's sad that in every game
there has to be a loser.

GIRL: And bring it up,
four, two...

MAN: With six
straight losses,
the Armadillos

are looking for anything
to keep their spirits up.

RIG: Come on,
Iron men!

Don't give up!
Don't give up!

Come on!
Keep kicking!

Come on!

Move it, I said!
Come on!

Get it on!
Get it on!

Move it!

NEIDERMAN: The Armadillos
drop their seventh
heartbreaker of the season,

a squeaker,
35 to 12.

Damn!

Shit!

NEIDERMAN: So the Armadillos
are 0 and 8

with two games left
in the season.

Wyatt, you dumb
cowboy asshole!

If you opened up
a God damn hole
for once,

maybe you'd know
who to frigging
block, huh?

Put it all on me!
That's frigging
right, man!

PLAYER: You couldn't catch
a cold in Alaska,
what's wrong with you?

Hey, man! Why don't you
go bang a kangaroo!

If you knew
the first thing about it...

(SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY)

You guys got
a hell of a lot
of energy left

considering we lost
by 40 points.

Easy for you to say,
Mr. I-Don't-Got-To-
Play-Both-Ways!

No, shit!
Yeah!

We're sick of reading
about you in the newspaper!

"Paul Blake, arm of
the Armadillos!"

Hey, it's not his fault.
The whole team sucks.

Hey, bitch.
Hey! Hey!

What's wrong
with y'all?

Why don't we just
give up football for
a while, all right?

What we need to do
is get crazy.

Can I get an amen?
ALL: Amen.

We needs to get wild!
Yeah!

ALL: Yeah!

We needs to
par-tay!

(ALL CHEERING)

(ALL CHANTING) Party!

Hey Blake, the guys
are going to Billy Bob's
tonight. You want to go?

I've been.

You know, it wouldn't
hurt for the guys

to see you
hanging out tonight.

Buy them a round,
would you?

Yee-haw!

MAN:
Welcome to Billy Bob's.

The bar with its own
indoor bull-riding arena!
(ALL CHEERING)

(COWBELL CLANGING)

(TIMER BUZZING)

(SHOUTING)

(PEOPLE TALKING INDISTINCTLY)

MAN: Hey, Wyatt,
nice riding!

You must be hungry.

Man, I ain't eating
nothing that I might've
rode in here.

Charley, Manu.

Come over here.

How you doin'?
How you doin'?

Couple of pitchers,
please.

Andre, look
who's here.

Flat-top.

Guys, guys,
see who's here?

Texas State.

Why, they all's
the pussies that
ain't won a game yet.

(CHUCKLING)

Well, well, well,

if it isn't the by-God
number one Texas Colts.

Wow.

Did you say
something, sugar?
No, I...

You okay?
Yeah.

Paul... Ah.

He's all talk.

Party's over, guys.

We're on probation,
guys. You know that.

You know that, too.

What are you guys
thinking about?

If I wanted a big brother,
I wouldn't have killed mine.

Ooh!
Hey, come on you don't
want to mess with us.

We're nobodies.
We're nothing.

You guys,
you're undefeated.

You're 8 and 0.

We'll just take our
little party somewhere else.
Come on.

Okay.

Okay.

Tell you what
I'm going to do here.
I, uh...

I'm going to
buy you a beer.

Okay, and we can forget
this whole little incident
ever happened.

It's on me.

(LAUGHING)

(EXHALING)

Now it's on you.

Guess you wanted
a light beer, huh?
(LAUGHING)

On second thought,
maybe you'd better
buy me a keg.

Or better yet,
put a spigot
in that fat Buddha.

(ALL LAUGHING)

Easy.

BLAKE: We were
getting along so good.

You had to ruin it
by insulting my center.

My center.

(SCOFFS)

This is my
throwing hand here.

MAN: Oh, Lord.

Oh, shit.

(GRUNTING)

Hey, he bought
you a beer!

(ALL SCREAMING)

(GRUNTING)

(PEOPLE CLAMORING)

You all right?
Oh, I'm doing great,

other than the fact
that somebody hit me
with a chair.

Hello, Sheriff...

Yeah, it's Billy Bob's
again.

(GRUNTING)

Papke, you finally
threw something
that connected!

You know, the next time
we invite you to
hang with the guys,

keep your
white butt at home.
(CHUCKLING)

I thought you said
you wanted to
par-tay.

(LAUGHING)

(GRUNTING)

(SCREAMING)

(GRUNTING)

(GRUNTING)

(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)

(GASPS)

Uh-oh, no, go ahead.

(LAUGHING)

What took you
so long, Dean?

Sheriff,
I'm Dean Elias.

I heard
about the brawl
on my beeper.

So, where's
the brawl?

Brawl?

(SCOFFS)
There ain't no brawl.

Number one,
there isn't any brawl.

Number two,
what do you mean,
"There ain't no brawl?"

RIG: What you,
hard of hearing?
There was no brawl!

Wally, buy the Sheriff
some coffee.

I'll take
care of this, hm?
That's a good idea.

You don't get
yourself in no

trouble in here,
now you hear?

Let's go, boys.

Any trouble.

Hurts when they poke
you in the chest
like that, doesn't it?

You know, I don't think
you get the idea, Elias,

but, you see, if our boys
get caught in a brawl,

that means the Colts
get caught also,

and you don't get
elected Sheriff

by embarrassing
the pride of Texas.

For a quarter,
you can jump in.

Another game,
another time,

Coach Gennero.

(SIGHING)

(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)

Blake!

Let's talk.

Put this away
for me, would you?

I'll be seeing you
on the field.
(LAUGHING)

I'm really
looking forward to it.

See you around,
Flat-top.

Come on, boys.
Let's get out of here.

Look, Coach, the guys
were just blowing off
a little steam you know...

No, you can't
afford to act like
normal students.

You just can't
blow off steam.

See, Dean Elias is
looking for any excuse
to bury us.

Hmm?

Okay, Coach,
I'm sorry.
I just...

See, you'll never
be a winner

unless you learn
to control your
team, Blake.

Damn it!
I'm just trying
to do...

Just answer one
thing for me.

Who threw
the first punch?

(CLEARING THROAT)

All right.
(SIGHING)

Get that thing
looked at.

(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

Hi.
What are you
doing here?

Well, I'm
kind of bleeding
in your doorway.

Can I come in?

Yeah, come in.

Didn't I tell you
to wear a helmet?

BLAKE: I only went
because I thought that's
what he wanted me to.

You know,
I'm trying to read
this man's mind.

Should I...
Should I protect them?

Should I drink
with them? What?

Thanks.

You know
I just can't
seem to win.

(SCOFFS)
Tell you what.

I'm too old for this.

He treats me
like I'm some kind
of a kid.

You've got
to go and talk
to the man.

(SIGHING)
You can't just leave
this unresolved.

I can't talk to him.
He's a coach.
I'm a football player.

He can't talk to me
like I was human.

Have you tried?

I tried with you.

Look, you have
to understand
how hard it is

to get respect...
Respect as a female
teacher, yeah.

I know.
(SIGHING)

You ought to try
getting respect

as a football
player sometime.

Okay, let's
clear the boards.
Let's start again.

Square one.

Truth?

Truth.

Okay.

Paul Blake,

freshman
quarterback.

Suzanne Carter,
cheerleader,
Hollokan High.

What?

47 to 6,
state finals, 1975...

"The Game."

Oh, shit.

You know, we thought
we had a real chance.

That was our
best team ever.

You threw
for 5 touchdowns,

420 yards in the air.

I mean,
you decimated us.

You decimated
my boyfriend,

and you have no idea
what you did to me.

Wait a second.
Are you telling me

this is all
about a grudge?

A grudge?
(CHUCKLING)

No.

I cut your picture
out of the sports page.

I made my girlfriends
drive past your farm
with me.

I used to call
your house
and hang up.

I was nuts about you.

Is it hot in here?
Can we take a walk?

(DOOR OPENING)

All I know is that
we play the Kansas
Jayhawks on Saturday

and we still
don't have a kicker.

Don't worry.
We'll find a kicker.

Where are we
gonna find a kicker?

We're going
to find a kicker.
I guarantee it.

Hey, Wally,
this way.

No, no, no.
Come on. Let's get
some air.

Walk off some of
that pasta

that you're always
shoveling down.

Look over that play
that I drew up?

Wally, it's a gimmick
play. It'll never work.

Oh! Sorry, I forgot.
You're a genius.

That's why you have
a bigger whistle
than I do.

(WHISTLING)

I can't believe it.
Now he's got
whistle envy.

Ah...

Hell of a
kick, huh?

Yes. 40-50 yards.
I mean, they can...

Don't even think
about it, Wally.
Wrong gender.

There is nothing
on the books that
says a woman

can't play
college football.
Come on.

Now, Wally...

Hey, Rig!
Is that
what you wanted?

Ooh-whee, Sarge!
Look at that.

They're putting
a bloody Sheila
on the team.

We'll be the laughingstock
of college football.

What do you think
we are now?

Okay, I'm ready.
Let's try one.

Hut!

Manu...

Snap me the ball.

Snap the ball,
damn it!

(WHISTLING)
Hello, Manu.

BLAKE: Manu, hike me
the ball!

Hut!

Relax, big guy.

You've
already
got the job.

Hut.

(GRUNTING)

Nice kick.

Aw, it was
a little off.

All right. Take it
back 10 yards.

(GRUNTING)

Ooh! Are you
kidding me?

Yo, man, see?

That's the pressure
of TV, man.

That's what happened
to wrestling, man.

Women take over
the sport, man.
(CHUCKLING)

How about
taking it back
10 yards.

(GRUNTING)

Wow.

MAN: Ooh, ooh, ooh!
MAN 2: She can kick.

Yeah!

Oh! Man,
that was 40 yards.

How long was that?
40 yards.

Can you believe that?
Oh, yeah.

I don't even
drive that far.
(LAUGHING)

She's got some foot!
MCKENZIE: Yeah, yeah.

It keeps
getting better
on the way up.

(HOOTING)

Hey!

(ALL LAUGHING)

MAN: Peace, brother.

Lucy, this is Manu.

Nice to meet you,
Manu.
Hi.

Wally, call me
crazy,

but I've got a feeling
about tonight's game.

I don't know.
Maybe we've got
a shot, hmm?

(THUNDER RUMBLING)

(BAND PLAYING)

What an amazing game!

The Armadillos have put on

a tremendous
defensive effort tonight,

not allowing
a touchdown in
3 1/2 quarters of play.

And speaking of
tremendous efforts,

we have word from
University Hospital

that homecoming queen
runner-up Heidi Blair

is in satisfactory
condition

following that freak
lightning strike
at halftime.

So, with less
than a min...
(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)

So with less than
a minute to play,

your Fighting Armadillos
trail the Kansas Jayhawks
3 to 0.

But in a typhoon,
it's anybody's game.

(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)

All right, guys!
Watch 'em
on the inside!

Come on!

(PLAYERS CLAMORING)

Hut! Hut!

(CHEERING)

Yes, yes, yes!

(WHISTLING)

NEIDERMAN: Edison is down
at the Jayhawk 37,

although he did
hydroplane to the 19.

First down, 'Dillos,
but time is running out
in this game

clock down to 20 seconds.

(CHEERING)

Aw, shut up.

All right!
First down!

Quarterback draw on 2.
Ready!

ALL: Yeah.

You all right?
Follow me,
Mr. Blake.

(PLAYERS CLAMORING)

Come on, kid.
Come on, kid.

Here we go.

Set!

Hut! Hut!

NEIDERMAN: Blake in the
open field. He's got a shot
to go all the way!

Come on, Paul!

Hit him! Hit him!
Hit the big guy!

NEIDERMAN: He breaks
a tackle. Oh, he slips!

(GRUNTING)
The ball's loose!
Oh! It's a fumble!

They're all piling on.

Who's got it?

Fumble.

Blue ball.
Blue, blue!
MAN: Sit down, you jerk!

NEIDERMAN: Tough break.
I think Blake could've scored.

The ref is digging
through the bodies now.

Let's see who's gonna
comes up with it.

McKenzie comes up
with it!

The little
Australian rugger!

(CHEERING)

Stop that clock
before time's up!

Lucy, get your ass
in here!
Wally...

Lucy.

She did well
in practice.

Send her in,
for Christ sakes!
These are big guys.

She might get hurt.
What the hell
you talking about?

Hey Coach, put me in.
I can do it.

We can't risk a pass.

We gotta to kick!

All right. Go in.
Watch yourself,
young lady.

Go! Go! Go!

NEIDERMAN:
Lucy Draper is the first
woman football player

in Armadillo history.

You all right?

BLAKE: Field goal!
On the snap!
Ready?

ALL: Break!

NEIDERMAN: Blake will spot
the ball for a 34-yard try.

Do it.
All right, Miss,
let's go!

Come on, kid.

Hey, sugar!

Don't get nervous!

That the only way
you can score?

Shut up, or you
will anger me!

Yeah!

NEIDERMAN: The clock stopped
with just three seconds left.

There's time for
just one last play.

It's good!
Armadillos tie!

(GRUNTING)

(WHISTLING)

Welcome to football.

(CLAMORING)

You will fall!

(GRUNTING)

Welcome to foot, ball!

(YELPING)

(SHRIEKING)

She can take care
of herself.

Yo, man, we tied!

(CHEERING)
All right!
We tied!

(SHRIEKING)

All right!
Bring it in guys.
Quick, quick!

Listen, no speeches.

I'm proud of you.

Now let's get out
of the monsoon.
Come on, go, go.

DRAPER: Yeah! Whoo!

NEIDERMAN:
Armadillos tie.

What an incredible upset.

The rain stops,

and so does the Armadillos'
losing streak.

A real confidence-booster
for next week,

going into the last game
of the season,

Saturday night.

(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)

Do you believe that?
You were wonderful.

One man between me
and a touchdown,

between me
and a win,
and I blew it.

Paul, you tied.

Tied?
We could have won.

(SCOFFS)

That's the best
the team has played
all season.

You trying
to cheer me up?

Yeah.

ELIAS: God!

Suzanne,
how could you?
I'm shocked.

You're
a highly regarded
faculty member,

and personally
I'm very disappointed.
Uh-huh.

Phillip, what I do
on my own time is
none of your concern.

Well, I think...
Would you
excuse us please?

We're having
a conversation here.
Excuse me.

Conversations
have words, not tongues.

Just let me
handle this, okay?

ELIAS: No, no,
let me handle it.

Are you going
to jeopardize
your career

over an affair
with a student?

DRAPER: We're
consenting adults.

So were
Bonnie and Clyde.

What about
ethical standards?

What about minding
your own business?

Why don't you
just tell him how we
feel about each other?

Don't pressure me, okay?
Look, this is bullshit.

Why don't you just tell him?
Go and get a beer,
butterfingers.

Can we not talk
about this right now?

Why don't you
just get lost.
Fight! Fight!

God damn it, would you
stay out of this?

Why don't you
just tell him?

(SIGHING) Fine.

(SOFTLY) Paul.

You know, I was...
All right.
Oh!

That was easy.

(PLAYERS CLAMORING)
Okay, everybody out!

Banks, Sarge, get out!

Lucy's got
to shower, man.
Get out!

Get out! Get out!

Come on. Lucy's
got to shower.

Let's have some
respect, man.
Lucy's got to shower.

MANU: Come on, brothers.

(PLAYERS CLAMORING)

Get out of here, man.
Do it.

Hurry up.
Have some respect.

I can't believe
you guys.

(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)

This is silly.

I'm not going to go
halfway across campus

just to take a shower.

I'm an Armadillo,
just like the others.

You're an Armadillo,

but not like the others.

You're okay, Manu.

Would you do me the honor
of allowing me

to escort you
to Edison's party?

All right.

But just don't try to
carry me in or anything.

Okay.

(WHISTLING)

(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)

(INDISTINCT LAUGHTER)

Moet, sir?

McKenzie,
what the hell
is a moet?

It means,
you want some more...
Eh?

Brainiac.
Fill them up,
waiter.

Excuse me, guys.

Can everyone
quiet down, please?

Uh, my father would like
to say a few words.

(CHEERING)

Boys, you played
a hell of a game

against a major
college tonight.

(CHEERING)

And those jackets
look great.

Now they're
just a token

to show that the alumni
appreciate
what you're doing.

So wear them with pride.

Keep up the good work.
We'll take care of you.

Stand up. Let's get
a look at those jackets.

100% cashmere.

Come on, now. What the
hell's going on here,
guys? Come on.

Take those jackets off.
Let's go.

Party's over, gentlemen.
This Armadillo team

will not accept
gifts from boosters.

That's how it starts...

Champagne,
presents, cash.

Not this team. Let's go,
leave the God damn
jackets, come on.

Coach, this is
a private party.

Now,
how about coming
and sitting down...

Hey, Dad, Dad,
could you do me a favor?

Can you just,
just butt out of
this one?

Okay?

We'll talk about
this later.
Yeah.

GENNERO: All right, guys.
Come on. Let's go.

Take it easy, Coach.
They're just kids.

Yeah. I know that, Blake.
That's why...

You know,
I expected a little
more from you.

Let's go, come on.

It's not about me.

It's not about them,
either, although
it should be.

They've been killing
themselves out there.

Nah! This is about you
trying to prove something

to the rest
of the world.

(SCOFFS)
Why don't you just relax

and let these guys
feel good
for five minutes?

No, I can't do that.
And neither can you.

Now when are you
get it through
your head, Blake?

High school is over.

You wanna be
a leader? You have
to grow up.

Now what happened
on that field
out there tonight

doesn't change
the rules.
Rules?

You know what you can do
with your fucking rules?
What?

Come on.
Knock it off!
Knock it off!

Nobody's going
to get hurt here.

RIG: Go on home.

That's a hell
of a good idea, Coach.

In fact, I quit.

All right, guys,
come on. Let's go.

Pack it up.
Let's go.

Let's go, you guys.
Come on.

Come on, guys.

You slap that righteous
paintbrush around
pretty wide, Ed.

No Wally,
I did what I had to.
No shit.

Well, they're my team, too,
and they're good kids.

What do you do?
You de-ball him
in front of everybody.

You're wrong, Ed.
You are wrong.

(TIRES SCREECHING)

Hey, how about a lift?

Where you headed?

Anywhere but here.

Huh? Let's go.

(ENGINE STARTING)
Suit yourself.

You're on your own
getting back.

(COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING
ON CAR STEREO)

(MUSIC STOPS)

I hate that station.
My dad owns it.

I don't ever want to
see another building
with his name on it.

Too bad you got
midterms next week.

No, I don't.

What you think
my dad's gonna do

when he finds out
someone's going
to flunk me, uh?

What are you
talking about?

You have been
keeping up okay,
haven't you?

Yeah. I mean
I got two cheerleaders
doing my homework,

but I got to take
the tests.

When he finds out
that I didn't pass,

he'll just buy me
another grade,

and you know what that
could do to the team.

Look, if you're sick of
your old man covering
for you, that's fine.

You just gonna
have to drag your
butt back there

and work harder,
that's all.

You can't just
walk away.

Well, you did.

How did I wind up
with Jiminy Cricket?

EDISON: Hey, hey, Paul,
what are you doing?

I can't go back there.
I've been cheating.

BLAKE: Relax. Maybe we'll both
learn something.

EDISON: Paul,
listen, this isn't
going to work.

I've never
passed anything
on my own before.

The damn library's
got your name on it.

It's about time
you saw the inside
of it.

Meet your new tutor.
Hi, homey.

Andre?

Relax, Edison.

I've programmed
some interactive
software

that gonna accelerate
your learning curve

by linking mnemonic
memory aids

with visual motor cues.
Guys I really don't know
what to say about this.

Say good-bye
to the daylight.
(LAUGHING)

Just keep thinking,
"The ball is my friend,
the ball is my friend."

"Ball is my friend."

(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)

Edison is studying
with Andre.

We're going to have
to practice without him.

You're not worried
about Saturday?

If he doesn't pass
his midterms,
he's out.

And the rest
of the team will do
whatever it takes

to back him up.

If we pull together,
I figure Saturday
will take care of itself.

Take 'em out.

It's your team, son.

Go for it.

(WHISTLING)

(ALL CHEERING)

ELIAS: Excuse me.

Finished grading
the exams already?
Good.

Let me look them over.
What for?

I don't question
your judgment, Suzanne.

It's your integrity.
What are you
talking about?

You'd better decide
how serious

your commitment
to academics is.

Perhaps you've
allowed your emotions
to induce you

to give football players
grades they didn't earn.

So I'm going
to re-grade the exams
objectively,

and when I'm finished,
they're finished.
N'est-ce pas?

Fine, Phillip.
Take the exams.
Good.

And if you change even
one of those grades,

I'll call for
an academic review,

and you can explain
your interference
to them.

Don't cross me, Suzanne.

Up yours, Phil.

She called me Phil.

(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)

So, what did you get?

I got a "C."

Hey, you passed.
All right!

(ALL CHEERING)

All right!

Hey, guys! Guys!

Basic losing...

Is over!
Yeah!

Good job, bro.

Way to go, man.

You did it.
You did good.
Yes, I did.

Yes, I did.

Let me get my jacket.
I'll see you at
practice, all right?

(HUMMING)

(GASPS)

Oh!
RIG: Ed, what is it?

What's the matter?
You okay? What?

(PANTING)
Your timing's perfect,
Wally.

I don't feel so good.
(PANTING)

(SIREN WAILING)

I never lost a game
in high school.

Not one.

It was
a great feeling.

I miss it.

I still dream
about it.

I'd love to
give those guys
that feeling

just once.

I mean,
they work so hard.

They don't deserve
to go out losers.

Paul, you remember
what you wrote
about that first game?

How Gennero won
just 'cause
his team played?

(SCOFFS)

You've built
something great here
with these kids.

They'd lay down
and die for you.

I don't want
them to die.

I want them to win.

NURSE: Excuse me
Dr. Miller, can I talk
to you for a minute?

Ed, it's me.

Wally Riggendorf.

I know it's you.
I'm not in a coma.

I brought these
for you.

Oh, thank you.
They're...
They're lovely.

Just put them here,
will you?
(CLEARING THROAT)

I hope you don't mind

I had to charge them
to your room.

I'm a little short
this week.

Oh, I understand,
Wally.

Would you sit down?
I want to talk to you.

(SNIFFLING)

I'm here, Ed.

I'm here.
You don't have to talk
like I'm dying.

They're just running
some tests.

They haven't found
anything yet.

That's wonderful news.

I want you
to have this, Wally.

Your playbook?

I don't know
what to say.

I'll treasure it.
Always.

I'm not bequeathing
it to you.

I'm just loaning
it to you.

You're coaching
the team tonight.

Me? Nah. Come on.
(SCOFFS)

I'm just defense.

No. You're ready, Wally.
You've been ready
for 20 years.

I just haven't told you.

To the kids,
you're the team.

I'm just the guy
who hollers
and kicks ass.

They respect you, Wally.

You can't bullshit kids.
They see right through it.

They know you're
the real thing,
and so do I.

You can do it, Wally.

Just be yourself.

Hmm.

The big whistle.

What the hell's
the time?
I've no idea.

Hey, Andre,
what's up man?

Man, I don't know,
but something's
definitely ain't right

when coaches don't
show up for a game.

(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)

(WHISTLING)

(GIGGLING)
Nice suit.

Men, I've got some
bad news for you.

You better sit down.

Down! Everybody. Down.
What's the matter?

Down.

Coach Gennero
is not going to be
with us tonight.

He's had a slight
heart attack.

Is he all right?

All I can tell you is
that he's in the hospital.

But don't worry.

I'm head Coach now,

and I've got
Gennero's playbook.

And I've got
his whistle.

Now, I know
that we're playing

the number one team
in Texas,

and I don't want to put

any undue pressure
on you guys...

But Gennero's
last words were,

"Win...

"Or I'll die."

(CROWD CHEERING)

Who cares that they're
the first-place team?

Look at them.

Well, look who it is.

I've been
waiting for you.

All right,
visiting captain,
it's your call.

Let him call it.

All right, home captain,
it's your call.

Heads.

It's tails.

REFEREE: Visiting team,
you win the call.

What do you
elect to do?

We'll receive.
REFEREE: You'll receive.

Home team, which end
will you defend?

Very well.

All right, let's
shake hands and have
a good, clean game.

NEIDERMAN: This Armadillo
team is on a roll

after last week's
non-loss.

They have the fans
talking upset here.

It's no secret,
there's a lot of
bad blood

between these two teams.

You can feel
the excitement
in the air. In fact...

To accommodate
all the fans,

the troughs in the men's
concourse restrooms
have been enlarged.

ALL: Oh-ah!

RIG: All right.
Don't let anybody
get outside now. Nobody!

Good luck, Coach.
(LAUGHING)

Hey, I haven't seen you
in a suit before.

You're looking good.

Thank you,
President Purcell.
Thank you very much.

(WHISTLING)

NEIDERMAN:
Hawkins takes
it on the 6.

He's got a lane.

Come on!

He's across midfield.

Where's the flag?

He's going. He's only
got one man left to beat.

No!

He's in the end zone.
(WHISTLING)

I'm waiting for a flag.

(CHEERING)

There's no flag.
There should be.

That will put
the Colts ahead,
seven to nothing.

A 96-yard touchdown
on the opening kickoff

could give the Colts
a false sense
of confidence

going into the second
minute of play.

(CHEERING)

Flood left! Flood left!

Hurt somebody there.

I'm going to rip your
fat head off, old man.
All night.

Blue 32!

Blue 32!

Set! Hut! Hut!

That's a blitz!
Watch it!

(WHISTLING)

MAN: Way to go, flat-top!
There you go, baby!

RIG: Number 55!

Throw a block at him!

I'm running over
your ass, fat boy.

BLAKE: Green 25!

Set! Hut!
Go on.

NEIDERMAN:
That's the fourth sack
on Blake tonight.

And the Colt fans
are really eating it up.

(CHEERING)

Sit down. Sit down.

Put a lid on it.

I'm going to kill you.

You're mine!

Set!

Hut! Hut!

(GRUNTING)

Harlan "Flat-top" Meyers
is turning this

into a personal grudge match
against Blake.

KRIMM: We got him
next time, man.
We got him next time.

BLAKE: No sweat, guys.
We'll get him
on the next one.

(WHISTLING)

Hey, Ref, how about
a flag on that?

Who was it,
Flat-top again?
MAN: Yeah.

Aw, hell.

Maybe we ought
to think about

blocking him sometime
tonight, huh?

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
Where do you think
you're going?

None of your
business, smokey.

Hey, back to the seats.

You've made a serious
career mistake, my friend.

(CHEERING)

(WHISTLING)

NEIDERMAN:
Oh, what a disappointment.

The Colts get into
the end zone

for their
third touchdown.

MAN: Come on.
Let's go.

MAN 2: Head for the side.
Come on.

Ready.

(WHISTLING)

NEIDERMAN: The extra point
makes it 21-nothing.

And the Armadillos
head for the locker room

trailing by only
three touchdowns.

We hope you
stay with us for our
halftime extravaganza,

as your Texas State
marching band

presents their tribute
to gun racks

and open beverage
containers

which is only legal
in Texas.

All right, guys,
gather round.

Gather round.
(CLAPPING)

(SIGHING)

So...

We're losing 21-0.

But you know something?

I think we got a shot
at beating this team...

If, like Coach
Gennero said,

we develop a cohesive
offensive strategy.

Papke, my notes.

What coverage
were they in here?

That's a double-double,
Coach.

Double-double.
It doesn't matter.
McKenzie,

McKenzie,
you're cutting off
your outside route.

You cut inside
for the dump-off,
right?

And linemen...
Linemen, come on, now.

You got to give Blake

at least four seconds
to throw the God damn
football.

Don't you?
Yeah.

Now, let's analyze
what's been
working for us.

Not a God damn thing's
been working for us!

Like this God damn suit
doesn't work for me

and this stinking tie
and this God damn shirt!

It doesn't work for me!

You know
how to play winning
hard-nosed football?

You play football
like Ed Gennero
played football!

A guy who gave his life
for this football team.

He was a 140-pound
halfback,

and he played
like a God damn
wild man.

No! Like a God damn
rampaging beast!

And that's the way
you got to do it!

You go tear their
fucking heads off,

and you shit
down their necks!

Let us pray.

(CROWD CHEERING)

(WHISTLING)

(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)

NEIDERMAN:
The Armadillos have
started to move the ball

here in the second half.

It's 4th down.
Punting situation.

McKenzie's deep
to kick the ball.

Set!

Hut!

NEIDERMAN:
It's a fake punt.

Blake throws one
hellacious block,

setting Edison free
in the Colts' secondary.

He's got a wall
of blockers now.

He's going all the way.

Go! Go! Go!
Go! Go! Go!

Touchdown!
(WHISTLING)

He's in for 6.

All right!

(CROWD CHEERING)

I don't know what
Coach Rig said
at halftime,

but this Armadillo
team is fired up.

Way to go!
Lucy!

Lucy, get in there
and kick that ball.

Go!

NEIDERMAN: And the press
booth goes nuts

as Lucy kicks
the extra point.

We're within three touchdowns
of taking the lead now.

What is it, Doc?
Is it bad?

Hiatal hernia.
A rupture
in the diaphragm

that puts pressure
on the pulmonary cavity
and causes angina.

Well, is it fatal?

Indigestion?

Only in Mexico.

NEIDERMAN: It's 3rd
and long. A passing
situation for the Colts.

(GRUNTING)

Big sack by Manumana
the slender,

who does his
"I'm going to go out
and get some poi"

sack celebration dance.

And the 'Dillos
will get the ball back

with four minutes left
in the third quarter,

and a chance to get back
into this game.

Brown right. 22 trap.
Wait, man.

They've
seen the game films.

They know you'll
never go to me,

and I'm wide open.
I'll catch it.

(ALL GRUMBLING)

Big play! Big play!
Let's go!

Make it work.

RIG: Make it work.

The ball is my friend.

The ball is my friend.

NEIDERMAN: Featherstone's
off to the races.

Don't throw it
to Stonehands!

NEIDERMAN: He's wide open,
but that's nothing new.

(GRUNTING)

NEIDERMAN: Can he
catch the ball?

He caught it!
Oh, my God!

Featherstone caught
the ball.

It's a touchdown!

It's 21-13.

(CROWD CHEERING)

All right, Stonehands!

Yeah! Whoo!

Carver, first of all,
I want all the security
guards here fired,

but never mind that now.
I've brought
the books.

I've re-graded the exams.
I was strict but fair.

NEIDERMAN: Time ticking down
here in the third quarter.

Armadillos have
the ball again.

All right. Here we go.

Split right.
28 sweep on 2. Ready?

ALL: Break!

This University's made
for people like us.

Not these guys,
they don't belong here.

Set!

Hut! Hut!

It's for men like
you and me
in the first place.

Hiya, boys.
Yah!

(WHISTLING)

(CAMERAS CLICKING)

By the way,
you're fired.

ALL: Break!

This is you, baby,
this is you!

MAN: Let's go!

You must show us
some respect.

NEIDERMAN: It's
a seesaw battle.
Neither offense can move.

Colts driving now
with the ball.

Armadillos better
stop them.

(WHISTLING)

NEIDERMAN: Now, how could
the ref call that?

It was a clean kick
to the face mask.

That guy's
going ape shit.

Come on! Come on!

Attababy!

Illegal contact.

Number 51.

Zenkutsu elbow thrust
to the halfback.

Oi-wamatsu roundhouse
lunge kick

to the quarterback.

Tekatami hand
sword block
to the...

Shit, never mind.

15 yards. 1St down.

It's late in the fourth
quarter. Still 21-14.

But the Colts driving
deep in Dilloville.

Got to have
that ball.

RIG: God damn!
Come on, get it!

Come and get it!

All right, baby!
Come on, now!

Wally.
Not now.

Hey baby,
come on.
Wally.

Come on.
Ed!

Oh, it's Ed.

You're alive.
It's a miracle.

It's not a miracle.
It was indigestion.

Indigestion? Ed,
they're killing us
with the 37 slant.

I know,
try the El Paso stunt
on the weak side.

It'll cut off the run,
open up Andre
on the pass rush.

Indigestion.
You son of a bitch.

Papke, send it in.
Come on, try it,
come on.

That's all right.

Come on. Let's go
get the ball.

NEIDERMAN:
Just 1:28 remaining.

It's goal line stand time
for the 'Dillos.

Any kind of score here
puts the game out of reach.

Boy, me and you
going to par-tay.

Hut!
(GRUNTING)

Andre Krimm breaks into
the backfield.

The ball pops out. Fumble!
Fumblelaya! Fumblerooskie!

Armadillos pile
onto the ball.

They've got it!
They've got it!

(WHISTLING)

They do have it!

Holy Columbus, Ohio!

Manumana the slender
comes up with the fumble

after a big Andre Krimm
hammered the ball loose.

The turnover gives
the Dillos new life.

The 'Dillo offense takes over
on their own 6-yard line.

Set.
Blake lines them up.

Time's a factor with only
a minute remaining.

Featherstone breaks
loose. He could go
all the way.

(GRUNTING)

Oh, he's tackled from
behind at the 12.

Break those blocks!
Execute!

Armadillos have the ball.
First and 10 at the Colts'
12-yard line.

Whoo!
(WHISTLING)

That rotten play!
Don't run that again.

I'm coming
after you, pal.

You're going
to eat that ball.

NEIDERMAN: It's second down.

Hut.

Blake back to pass.

(GRUNTING)

(WHISTLING)
Incomplete pass,

stopping the clock
with just 19 seconds left.

Third down now.
Blake has to pass again.

He gives it off
to sargie.

(GRUNTING)
(WHISTLING)

Oh! Incomplete pass!

Stopping the clock
with 14 seconds left.

The Armadillos
are so close,

but you can see
the exhaustion
taking its toll.

Three points,
they're not gonna
do it this time.

It's time to try
your play, Wally.

Quarterback option?
Are you nuts, Ed?

It's a gimmick play.
It'll never work.
You said so yourself.

Blake isn't through.
He's got juice left.

Papke, send it in.

I'll be damned.

How many time-outs
do we have?
Three.

Can we take them
all now?

Now, listen up.

BLAKE: You're hurt.
You're tired.
You're bleeding.

I'm going to make you
a promise.

(EXHALING) We get
in that end zone,

you're not gonna
feel any pain.

You hear
what I'm saying?
All right.

BLAKE: Huh?
Oh, yeah.

All right, here we go.

You split right.

Fake 28 sweep.

Rig's play.
Right.

All right,
let's do it.

On 2. Ready?

ALL: Break!

NEIDERMAN: It's fourth down.
This is the last play
of the game.

ALL: Defense!

ALL: Defense!

Blue 32.

Blue 32.

Set!

Hut! Hut!

NEIDERMAN: Blake
pitches to Edison.

He's looking to pass.

He's got a man
down the left sideline.

It's Blake!

It's a miracle!

(WHISTLING)
Touchdown, Armadillos!

It's 21-20 with
the extra point
yet to come.

The Armadillos can
tie the score by
kicking the extra point.

On the other hand,
they actually have
a chance to win the game

if they go for
the 2-point conversion.
Let's see what they do.

(CROWD CHEERING)

Should we go
for the tie
or the win?

Ah! It's your
call, Wally.

Hey Coach,
we got people
they are hurt.

Shit!

Lucy, Banks, Papke,
get over here.

(CROWD CHEERING)

The Armadillos send in
the kicking team.

Banks in for Wilkerson,
Papke in for Roanoke.

Hey, maybe now's not
the best time to make sure
everyone is played.

Hey, I haven't played.
I'm not out there.

I guess the Armadillos
are going for the tie.

And what a tremendous
moral victory

it would be to tie
the number one Texas Colts.

I don't know Paul.
I've never tried to
block anybody before.

Papke. Papke.

I don't care
how you do it man.

Tell him a story,
spit in his ear,
entertain him...

Just keep him
off my ass.
Okay.

Mr. Blake,

they'll never touch you.

NEIDERMAN: The Colts
will come after the ball
with everything they've got

to try and block
this kick.

CROWD: (CHANTING)
Block that kick!
Block that kick!

NEIDERMAN: Blake takes
the snap. Takes the ball.

No! He's up!
It's a fake!

I can't believe it.
They're going for the win.

(GRUNTING)

Featherstone's drawing
double coverage.

Blake can't find anyone
to throw to.

(GRUNTING)

There's an open man
in the end zone.

It's Charlie Banks.

(GRUNTING)

(WHISTLING)

(CROWD CHEERING)

BLAKE: Set! Hut!

(GRUNTING)