My Own Country (1998) - full transcript

( woman vocalizing in Indian

dialect )

( woman vocalizing in Indian

dialect )

Man:

I WAS BORN IN ETHIOPIA

TO INDIAN PARENTS WHO HAD COME

HERE TO BE TEACHERS.

( camera shutter clicks )

Man on radio:

SEPTEMBER 12,

1974, EMPEROR HAILE SELASSIE

OF ETHIOPIA HAS BEEN OVERTHROWN

BY DERG, A COALITION OF

MILITARY GENERALS WHO WISH TO

REMAIN NAMELESS.

Man: ONLY SIX MORE HOURS

BEFORE THE END OF CURFEW.

YOU WANT TO BUY US A DRINK,

INDIAN BOY?

SORRY. I HAVEN'T GOT ANY

MONEY.

( clanging noise )

STOP THAT, MAN, STOP THAT.

( gunshot )

WHEN YOU'RE FORCED TO LEAVE

A COUNTRY YOU ONCE CALLED HOME,

IT CHANGES EVERYTHING.

YOU CAN'T APPRECIATE THE SIMPLE

PLEASURES OF LIFE, YOU ENVY

PEOPLE AROUND YOU WHO CAN.

I WENT TO INDIA TO STUDY

MEDICINE.

I WANTED TO BECOME A DOCTOR

BECAUSE OF SOMERSET MAUGHAM'S

OF HUMAN BONDAGE,

A BOOK THAT

MADE MEDICINE SEEM THE MOST

ROMANTIC OF PROFESSIONS.

Teacher: YOU MUST LEARN TO

USE ALL YOUR SENSES.

YOU, SIR. WHAT DOES DIABETIC

COMA SMELL LIKE?

Student: ACETONE, SIR.

TYPHOID FEVER, VERGHESE.

FRESHLY BAKED BREAD, SIR.

SCROFULA. VADIVEL.

UH, AMMONIA, SIR?

WRONG. STALE BEER.

I THOUGHT YOU OF ALL PEOPLE

WOULD KNOW THAT.

NEVER FORGET, INSPECTION, THEN

PALPATION, THEN PERCUSSION,

AND FINALLY, AUSCULTATION.

WHICH IS OUR LEAST IMPORTANT

INSTRUMENT?

Students: THE STETHOSCOPE,

SIR.

AND WHY IS THAT?

BECAUSE, SIR, BY THE TIME YOU

HAVE LOOKED, FELT AND PERCUSSED,

YOU SHOULD KNOW WHAT YOU WILL

HEAR.

SIR.

HEY, MOHAN, LISTEN TO THE

LECTURE VADIVEL GAVE THE U.S.

CONSUL.

WHAT A VISIONARY.

WHAT PASSION!

TELL HIM, VADIVEL.

"SPARE ME THE CRAP," HE SAID,

"ABOUT COMIN' BACK TO SERVE

YOUR COUNTRY.

WHY'D YOU REALLY WANNA GO?"

SO WHAT DID YOU SAY?

I SAID, "SIR, CRAVING YOUR

FINE INDULGENCE, I WANT TO WORK

IN A DECENT TEN-STORY HOSPITAL

WHERE THE LIFTS ARE ACTUALLY

WORKING!

I WANT TO BECOME A GREAT DOCTOR.

PRACTICE REAL MEDICINE.

PAY ALL MY TAXES, AND NEVER COME

BACK TO THIS WRETCHED TOWN

WHERE DOCTORS OUTNUMBER FLEAS,

AND THE AIR IS NOT FIT TO

BREATHE!"

YOU ARE LAUGHING?

LAUGHING?

THE BUGGER REJECTED MY VISA.

HONESTY IS THE BEST POLICY,

MY BLOODY BUM.

YOU BUGGERS THINK IT'S

THAT EASY?

A BLOODY COW PATH TO AMERICA

DOESN'T LEAD TO GOOD HOSPITALS

FOR FOREIGNERS LIKE US,

UNLESS YOU'RE WILLING TO CLEAN

THE BLOODY TOILET.

YEAH, YEAH, WE KNOW YOU KNOW

EVERYTHING THERE IS TO KNOW

ABOUT AMERICA.

SHUT UP, BASTARD.

MY COUSIN TOLD ME.

HIS COUSIN.

HE SAID WE FOREIGN MEDICAL

GRADUATES ARE A BLOODY NUISANCE,

A PROBLEM, THAT WE'RE LIKE

TRANSPLANTED ORGANS.

LIFE-SAVING BUT REJECTED,

BECAUSE OF BLOODY FOREIGN

TISSUE.

AS THEY SAY IN AMERICA,

TOUGH SHIT.

♪ MALAIKA

NA KU PENDE MALAIKA

MALAIKA

NA KU PENDE MALAIKA

NAMI NIFANYEJE

KIJANA MWENZIO

NASHINDWA NA MALI SINA WE

NINGEKUOA MALAIKA

PESA ZASUMBUA ROHO YANGU

PESA ZASUMBUA ROHO YANGU

NAMI NIFANYEJE

KIJANA MWENZIO

NASHINDWA NA MALI SINA WE

NINGEKUOA MALAIKA

NASHINDWA NA MALI SINA WE

NINGEKUOA MALAIKA ♪

Abraham:

JOHNSON CITY,

TENNESSEE, 1985.

THE SAME YEAR A YOUNG MAN FROM

NEW YORK CAME HOME.

( country music on radio )

I CAN HEAR THE RADIO PLAYING.

I CAN PICTURE HIS PARENTS

WAITING FOR HIM.

HIS MOTHER COOKING HIS FAVORITE

FOOD.

( shivering )

Man: CODE BLUE, CODE BLUE!

Doctor: CLEAR!

CONTINUE CPR.

BICARB, EPINEPHRINE, I WANT

A SECOND I.V. LINE.

OKAY, CLEAR!

GO, GO, GO.

OKAY, HE'S COMIN' AROUND.

GOOD WORK, PEOPLE.

UH, I'M SORRY TO HAVE TO TELL

YOU.

YOUR SON HAS AIDS.

BUT HOW?

HOW COULD HE GET THIS?

WELL, HAS YOUR SON BEEN

HEALTHY IN THE PAST YEAR?

OH, YES.

DID HE EVER USE INTRAVENOUS

DRUGS?

LORD, NO.

IS HE MARRIED?

NO.

HE LIVE ALONE?

NO, HE HAS A FRIEND

IN NEW YORK.

A MALE FRIEND?

YES.

WE'VE NEVER MET HIM.

OH, LORD, IS THAT HOW HE GOT

THIS?

ARE YOU TELLING ME MY BOY'S...

A QUEER?

OH, MOTHER, DO YOU HEAR THIS?

DO YOU HEAR THIS?

DO YOU HEAR THIS?

( both weeping )

Abraham:

WORD SPREAD LIKE

WILDFIRE THROUGH THE HOSPITAL.

ALL THOSE INVOLVED IN HIS CASE

AGONIZED OVER THEIR EXPOSURE.

SOME MONTHS AFTER THE YOUNG MAN

FROM NEW YORK DIED, I RETURNED

TO JOHNSON CITY, WHERE I HAD

BEEN AN INTERN TWO YEARS AGO.

I WAS BACK NOW AS THE HEAD OF

INFECTIOUS DISEASES.

NO ONE CAN UNDERSTAND WHY THE

HELL ANYBODY WOULD LEAVE BOSTON

FOR TENNESSEE.

WHAT'D YOU SAY?

ABRAHAM WOULD SAY, "I'M GOING

BACK BECAUSE OF THE PEOPLE IN

TENNESSEE.

THEY'LL GIVE YOU THE SHIRT OFF

THEIR BACKS IF YOU'RE THEIR

FRIEND."

ABE'S A GOOD OL' BOY.

THAT STEPHEN, HE'S GONNA BE ONE,

TOO.

SO, DOC, YOU A FULL-FLEDGED

SPECIALIST NOW?

YOU CAN SAY THAT, YEAH.

I SURE AS HELL HOPE THEY'RE

OFFERIN' YOU A DECENT WAGE.

IT COULD BE BETTER, BUT IT'S

NOT BAD.

I'LL BE AT THE V.A. MOSTLY,

AND ALSO THE MIRACLE CENTER.

DO A SPOT OF TEACHING, SOME

RESEARCH.

NOW THAT YOU'RE A BIG SHOT,

I DON'T SUPPOSE YOU'D BE

INTERESTED IN RIDIN' A VINTAGE

TRIUMPH BIKE.

( laughs )

I HAD A FEELIN' IN MY BONES

YOU'D BE BACK, SO I DIDN'T SELL

IT.

KEPT HER OILED AND GREASED FOR

YA, RUNS REAL GOOD.

THANK YOU. THANK YOU.

YOU CAN THROW ONE HELLACIOUS

PARTY HERE.

( men laughing )

Allen: ... AN ASS LIKE THAT!

GETTIN' IT STRANGE, ALLEN?

GETTING IT STRANGE?

I'M GETTIN' IT STEADY.

HONEY, I'M HOME!

♪ MOVE YOUR SWEET LEGS

OVER HERE

I'M A-READY FOR MY BACK RUB ♪

BUT FIRST, RAJANI, FIRST.

I'M A-READY FOR MY BACK RUB ♪

BUT FIRST, RAJANI, FIRST.

YOU KNOW, RAJANI, I'VE ALWAYS

ENVIED PEOPLE LIKE YOU.

YOU CAN GO BACK HOME TO INDIA.

IT'S ALWAYS THERE FOR YOU.

I WANT THIS LITTLE GUY TO HAVE

WHAT I NEVER DID-- A PERMANENT

HOME.

I ENVY YOU SOMETIMES.

MY WORLD IS SO SMALL.

ALL I HAVE HERE IN AMERICA IS

YOU AND THE BABY.

BUT YOU, ANYWHERE YOU GO,

YOU'RE AT HOME.

YOUR FRIENDS ARE YOUR FAMILY.

IT SCARES ME SOMETIMES.

SORRY TO BE LATE.

I'M DR. ABRAHAM VERGHESE,

THE NEW HEAD OF INFECTIOUS

DISEASES.

VIKRAM NAIR.

THIS IS SHAHAIN ALI,

JOHN OKRI, AND ALBERTO RAMIREZ.

GOOD. IS THERE ANYTHING YOU

WANNA KNOW ABOUT ME?

WHAT MADE YOU CHOOSE

INFECTIOUS DISEASES AS

A SPECIALTY?

THAT'S VERY UNUSUAL.

I LOVE BEDSIDE MEDICINE.

IN AMERICA, IT'S A LOST ART.

I DON'T SUPPOSE ANY OF YOU

INTEND TO DO ANYTHING AS

OLD-FASHIONED.

SO, WHAT ABOUT AIDS?

AREN'T YOU AFRAID?

IT'S MY ONLY CHANCE TO PLAY

HERO.

( people talking quietly )

IF YOU DON'T STOP SMOKING,

YOU'RE GONNA BE IN TROUBLE.

WELL, HERE I AM, FOUGHT FOR

MY COUNTRY, YOU FOREIGNERS COME

OVER HERE, TELLIN' US WHAT TO

DO, MAKIN' MONEY OFF US.

I'M GONNA WRITE MY CONGRESSMAN.

YOU DO JUST THAT.

HEY, DOC.

Y'ALL GET ME AMERICAN DOCTORS,

JUST LIKE HER.

I'LL SEE WHAT I CAN DO.

HI, ABE.

OOPS. I MEAN, DR. VERGHESE.

IT'S NICE TO HAVE YOU BACK.

SADIE, CAN I HAVE A QUICK

WORD, PLEASE?

YOU SHOULD BE USING GLOVES.

YOU KNOW THE NEW RULES, DON'T

YOU?

I KNOW, I KNOW, BUT I KEEP

FORGETTIN'.

BESIDES, I CAN'T DRAW BLOOD WITH

GLOVES ON, 'CAUSE I CAN'T FEEL

ANYTHING.

YOU'LL JUST HAVE TO LEARN,

SADIE.

YOU'RE PLAYING WITH FIRE.

THERE IS NO AIDS AROUND HERE.

I MEAN, LOOK AT THAT OLD

BLOWHARD.

DOES HE LOOK LIKE A DRUG ADDICT

OR HOMOSEXUAL TO YOU?

ABE!

HI.

I AM SO EXCITED YOU'RE BACK!

OH!

AT LAST.

WE HAVE AN AIDS EXPERT IN TOWN.

THERE'S SO MUCH IGNORANCE HERE.

AND WE'VE BEEN FEELIN' THE

PINCH.

FEWER PEOPLE HAVE BEEN DONATIN'

BLOOD, 'CAUSE EVERYBODY THINKS

THEY'RE GONNA CATCH SOMETHIN'.

SO I GOT THIS VIDEOTAPE ON AIDS

THAT I'VE ALREADY SHOWN TO SOME

CHURCH GROUPS IN TOWN.

WILL YOU COME AND TALK WHEN

I SHOW IT AGAIN?

ALL RIGHT, OLIVIA.

BUT WHAT ABOUT THE GAY

POPULATION HERE?

WE OUGHTA SHOW THE TAPE AT

THE CONNECTION.

THANK YOU FOR REMINDIN' ME.

WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT?

THE CONNECTION?

IT'S A GAY BAR.

( Indian music plays )

I CAN'T DECIDE WHICH SHIRT

TO WEAR.

THIS IS A SMALL TOWN.

WHAT IF ANYONE SEES YOU GO IN

THERE?

YOU KNOW WHY I'M GOING.

I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT MYSELF.

I'M TALKING ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE.

YOU KNOW HOW THEY TALK.

AND AS AN INDIAN, YOU'RE NOT

EXACTLY INVISIBLE.

NO, NO, IT'S TOO LATE NOW.

I CAN'T LET OLIVIA DOWN.

HELP ME.

WHY BOTHER? GO NAKED.

( laughs )

( disco music playing )

THIS IS DR. ABRAHAM VERGHESE.

HE'S A SPECIALIST IN AIDS.

NOT EXACTLY.

MY SPECIALTY IS INFECTIOUS

DISEASES, AND AIDS HAPPENS TO

FALL...

WHATEVER. YOU'RE STILL MORE

OF AN EXPERT THAN ANYBODY ELSE

IN THIS TOWN.

WHAT CAN I GET YOU TO DRINK?

COULD I HAVE SOME WATER,

PLEASE?

BUBBLES?

TAP IS FINE, THANK YOU.

LET'S PLUG IN.

YOU CAN PUT IT ALL IN THE

BACK.

THAT MAN USED TO WORK AT THE

7-ELEVEN NEAR MY OLD APARTMENT.

Narrator on tape:

ACQUIRED

IMMUNE DEFICIENCY SYNDROME.

IT'S A BIG NAME WITH EVEN

BIGGER IMPLICATIONS.

WE WOULD ESTIMATE THERE ARE

APPROXIMATELY A MILLION PEOPLE

WHO'VE BEEN INFECTED WITH THE

VIRUS.

OUR FEAR, THAT WE MAY FACE AN

EPIDEMIC, IS CERTAINLY

JUSTIFIED.

THERE HAS BEEN A SUDDEN AND

RAPID SPREAD OF AIDS TO

THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE IN THIS

COUNTRY.

SOME 50% OF THESE PEOPLE HAVE

DIED.

GENTLEMEN, AND LADIES,

I GIVE YOU DR. ABRAHAM VERGHESE.

I'D BE HAPPY TO ANSWER

ANY QUESTIONS YOU MAY HAVE.

WHAT ARE THE CHANCES OF

GETTIN' AIDS HERE IN JOHNSON

CITY?

IF YOU WEAR A CONDOM, IT

SHOULD BE EXTREMELY LOW.

WHAT IF YOU DON'T, OR YOU

HAVEN'T?

( giggling )

IF YOU DON'T, IT DEPENDS UPON

HOW MANY OF YOUR PARTNERS WERE

INFECTED WITH THE VIRUS.

IT'S A BIT LIKE RUSSIAN

ROULETTE.

IN PLACES LIKE NEW YORK, SAN

FRANCISCO, BOSTON, MOST OF THE

CHAMBERS WILL HAVE BULLETS IN

THEM.

IN JOHNSON CITY, I JUST DON'T

KNOW.

WELL, I MEAN, LET'S SAY YOU

WERE REAL CAREFUL, AND, UM...

AND YOU TRUSTED SOMEONE,

ONLY TO FIND OUT LATER THAT

THAT SAME PERSON WAS CARRYING ON

WITH JUST ABOUT EVERYBODY.

AND, UH, AND HE WAS THE ONLY

PERSON THAT YOU'D BEEN WITH.

IS HE HIV-POSITIVE?

THAT'S WHAT I DON'T KNOW.

HE LEFT FOR ATLANTA.

BUT LAST I HEARD,

HE WAS... HE WAS SICK.

IN FACT, I THINK...

I THINK HE'S DEAD.

ALL OF A SUDDEN, THE VIRUS

WAS RIGHT IN OUR MIDST.

HOW MANY OF YOU HERE

HAVE TAKEN THE TEST?

THE TEST IS FREE, AND COMPLETELY

CONFIDENTIAL.

AND PLEASE, COME BY MY OFFICE

AT ANY TIME.

WHAT WAS COMMON IN SAN

FRANCISCO AND NEW YORK WAS

UNKNOWN HERE.

IT WAS LIKE WE WERE IN

A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.

I GOTTA RUN.

YOU GO AHEAD AND STAY FOR

A WHILE.

YOU MAY ONLY GET ONE CHANCE TO

SEE THIS.

♪ YOU KNOW FOREVER

IS JUST AN ILLUSION

COMIN' AND GOIN'

IN EVERY DIRECTION

NO SIGN IS SHOWING ME

WHICH WAY IS RIGHT

NOT GONNA WORRY

AND MAKE THE CONNECTION

IT'S TIME TO GET TO

THE HEAT OF THE NIGHT

SO I'LL DANCE

AND I'LL PRANCE

DUST OFF MY FEELINGS

AND TAKE THEM FOR A RIDE

AS I GLIDE

AND I SLIDE ♪

NEGATIVE, NEGATIVE,

NEGATIVE, NEGATIVE.

WHEW! THANKS.

THAT'S AMAZING.

WHY SHOULD YOU BE SURPRISED?

THIS IS RURAL TENNESSEE, NOT

SODOM AND GOMORRAH.

THIS MEANS WE CAN CONTAIN IT.

AIDS HASN'T YET REACHED OUR GAY

POPULATION.

THEY'RE THE ONLY HIGH-RISK GROUP

AROUND.

I FELT A SENSE OF URGENCY

THAT I HAD LACKED BEFORE.

I STARTED TO SPEAK EVERYWHERE.

I'D LIKE TO HEAR THE VIEWS OF

THE CONGREGATION ON THIS MATTER.

( clears throat )

HASN'T THE REVEREND JERRY

FALWELL SAID THAT HOMOSEXUALS

ONE DAY WILL BE UTTERLY

ANNIHILATED, AND THERE WILL BE

A CELEBRATION IN HEAVEN?

Preacher: AMEN.

MA'AM, WOULD YOU RATHER

BELIEVE MR. FALWELL OR THE

BIBLE?

THE GOOD BOOK SAYS, "JUDGE NOT

LEST YE BE JUDGED."

I BELIEVE THE BIBLE ALSO SAYS,

"LOVE THY BROTHER AS THYSELF."

AT LEAST THEY QUOTED ME CORRECT.

CAN'T YOU STOP NOW?

THIS ISN'T BOSTON.

IT'S SO EMBARRASSING.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF A CHILD

OF OURS TURNED OUT TO BE GAY?

DON'T SAY THAT.

RAJANI, ALL THOSE GAY MEN AT

THE CONNECTION ARE ALL SOMEONE'S

CHILDREN.

I HOPE THEY'RE LISTENING.

I HOPE THAT, WHILE THEY'RE

CHANGING CHANNELS AND FLIPPING

THROUGH THE PAPER, THEY'LL SEE

THE MESSAGE, 'CAUSE IT'S THE

ONLY WAY THEY'LL STAY ALIVE.

THERE'S NO DRUGS FOR THIS.

I CAN'T OFFER ANY CURE.

CAN YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?

I'M SORRY. I DIDN'T MEAN TO

LECTURE YOU LIKE THAT.

YOU'RE FORGIVEN.

( humming )

♪ NA KU PENDE MALAIKA

( humming )

♪ NA KU PENDE MALAIKA

( humming )

( continues humming )

SO, RAJANI, IS THE BABY

KICKING?

JUST LIKE A FOOTBALL PLAYER.

OH, SO NICE.

RAJANI, HOW IS YOUR HUSBAND

AND HIS AIDS?

RAJNITI, HOW ARE YOU?

ARE YOU EATING THE ALMONDS LIKE

I TOLD YOU TO?

YES, MRS. ALAM, I'M EATING

SEVEN ALMONDS EVERY MORNING,

JUST LIKE YOU SAID.

GOOD, GOOD, GOOD.

WHAT CAN I GET FOR YOU TODAY?

THREE PACK OF CHILI PEPPER.

AND TWO KILO BASMATI RICE.

I GIVE YOU DISCOUNT ON FIVE

KILO.

HI, MAMA.

HI, GORGEOUS.

SEE HOW THE GENERATION HAS

CHANGED?

CAN I HAVE MY RICE, PLEASE, THAT

I ORDERED LAST WEEK?

Woman on answering machine:

DR. VERGHESE, THIS IS MATTIE

VINES FROM VIRGINIA.

I'M VERY UPSET ABOUT MY BROTHER

GORDON.

I'LL JUST BE REAL HONEST WITH

YOU.

GORDON HAS HIV FACTOR.

COULD YOU CALL ME AT HOME

AT 555-8009?

IT'S URGENT.

THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

MY FIRST AIDS PATIENT IN

TENNESSEE IS ON HIS WAY.

MATTIE'S BROTHER.

ABRAHAM!

I'M SO GLAD YOU COULD COME SEE

US SO QUICKLY.

MATTIE, IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU.

I HEARD YOU WERE BACK IN

JOHNSON CITY, AND I SAW YOU ON

TV, THAT'S HOW I KNEW TO CALL.

I HEARD YOU WERE AT THE LAB

WHEN I GOT BACK, BUT I MISSED

YOU.

I WORK AT THE LAB CLOSE TO

HOME NOW, WHICH IS GOOD, NOW

THAT GORDON'S BACK.

LET ME COME STRAIGHT TO THE

POINT.

MY BROTHER GORDON'S BEEN SICK

A LONG TIME.

I MEAN, A VERY LONG TIME.

BUT HE IS REAL SICK TONIGHT.

SO WHEN DO YOU THINK YOU

CONTACTED THE VIRUS?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

YOUR TEST SAYS OCTOBER, 1985,

BUT DO YOU THINK IT COULD'VE

BEEN BEFORE THAT?

I GUESS I MUSTA GOT THE VIRUS

IN '80 OR '81.

AND HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN

FEELING POORLY?

MONTHS. NO, YEARS.

I WAS SICK FOR SO LONG AND,

AND LOSIN' WEIGHT...

EVEN BEFORE I CAME HOME.

AND WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN

FEELING SINCE YOU GOT HOME?

TIRED AND FEVERISH.

I STAY COLD ALL THE TIME,

AND THEN, I'LL SUDDENLY BREAK

A SWEAT.

OTHERWISE...

OTHERWISE, I'M DOIN' PRETTY

GOOD.

OKAY, GORDON.

I'D LIKE TO EXAMINE YOU NOW,

IF I MAY.

OKAY.

WE'RE GOING TO HAVE TO ADMIT

HIM.

HE'S ANEMIC, HE NEEDS

A TRANSFUSION, HE HAS YEAST IN

HIS MOUTH, AND I CAN HEAR RALES

IN BOTH LUNGS.

HONEY, DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT

A THING.

GORDON, I THINK YOU NEED

TO BE IN THE HOSPITAL.

I DON'T WANNA BE IN THE

HOSPITAL.

CAN'T YOU JUST GIVE ME SOME

MEDICINE AND SEND ME HOME?

IT'S NOT THAT SIMPLE.

THERE'S NO TWO WAYS ABOUT IT.

YOU DO WHAT THE DOCTOR SAYS.

DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT GORDO.

WE'LL TAKE VERY GOOD CARE OF

HIM.

I'LL COME BY AND SEE YOU IN

THE MORNING.

IN THE MEANTIME, GET SOME SLEEP.

I'M GONNA STAY RIGHT HERE.

I BROUGHT MY THINGS.

THAT PICTURE WAS TAKEN RIGHT

BEFORE I FOUND OUT ABOUT MY

BREAST CANCER.

YOU HAD CANCER, MATTIE?

I BEAT IT, THANKS TO GOOD

LUCK AND THE GOOD LORD ABOVE.

I TELL YOU, BAD LUCK JUST HAS A

WAY OF STRIKIN' OUT OF THE BLUE.

WHEN GORDON CAME HOME, IT WAS

LIKE ANOTHER TEST GOD WAS

GIVIN' US.

IT'S LIKE HE'S SAYIN, "OKAY,

LET'S SEE WHAT YOU ALL CAN DO

NOW."

AND I TELL YOU WHAT I'M GONNA

DO.

THERE'S NO TWO WAYS ABOUT IT.

I'M GONNA PLAY THE LORD'S HAND.

GORDON'S YOUR ONLY BROTHER,

RIGHT?

NO, THERE'S THREE OF US.

HERMAN'S THE OLDEST, HE WAS THE

HEAD OF THE HOUSEHOLD WHEN PA

WAS AWAY, THEN ME, THEN GORDO.

WE WERE TOUGH KIDS, HERMAN AND

ME.

ONLY GORDO WAS A SICKLY ONE.

POOR KID WAS IN AND OUT OF THE

HOSPITAL FROM THE TIME HE WAS

FOUR YEARS OLD.

HE HAD THE CROUP, HE HAD

BRONCHITIS.

AND HE HAD THEM FITS.

I THINK HE WAS 14 WHEN THE FITS

JUST WENT AWAY.

SUDDENLY, HE PUT ON INCHES.

HE DEVELOPED A STYLE.

HE BECAME THIS DAZZLING,

DAZZLING CREATURE.

IT WAS NOTHING SHORT OF

A MIRACLE.

HE WAS A VERY GOOD-LOOKIN' YOUNG

MAN.

♪ THERE YOU ARE

LIKE A DREAM FROM AFAR

NO OTHER VISION WILL DO

MY ONLY PASSION IS YOU

EVEN WHEN I'M FEELIN' BLUE

THERE YOU ARE ♪

THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, I'D LIKE

YOU TO MEET THE TWO PEOPLE IN

THIS WORLD WHO HAVE MADE MY LIFE

WORTH LIVIN'.

MATTIE, MY SISTER, AND MY MA...

VISITIN' US ALL THE WAY FROM

PREACHER'S CREEK, VIRGINIA.

( applause and cheering )

DANCE WITH ME, MATTIE.

ONE YEAR, GORDO DID NOT CALL

ON MOTHER'S DAY.

THEN MAMA'S BIRTHDAY CAME AND

WENT, AND STILL NO CALL.

IT WAS LIKE HE JUST DISAPPEARED

OFF THE FACE OF THE EARTH.

FOR FIVE YEARS, WE DID NOT KNOW

WHETHER HE WAS DEAD OR ALIVE.

( woman humming )

( gasps )

HEY, MATTIE.

WHAT YOU DOIN'?

MA!

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?

WHY HAVE YOU NOT CALLED

ALL THESE YEARS?

( Gordon laughing )

MA! MA!

MAMA, I'VE COME HOME.

Mother: THANK YOU, LORD.

( Gordon laughs )

GORDON?

HEY, PA.

HALLELUJAH.

OH, OH, MATTIE, LOOK WHAT

I GOT YOU, LOOK WHAT I GOT YOU.

( Mattie exclaims

wordlessly )

Mother: PRAISE THE LORD!

PRAISE THE LORD!

DANCE WITH ME.

GORDON, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

SHOULD I CALL THE DOCTOR?

NO, I'M OKAY.

OF COURSE HE'S ALL RIGHT.

HE'S JUST TIRED FROM ALL THAT

TRAVELIN'.

WE'RE JUST GONNA HAVE TO PUT

SOME FLESH ON HIM.

I KNOW I AIN'T BEEN MUCH OF

A FATHER, AIN'T BEEN AROUND

THAT MUCH.

BUT NOW THAT YOU'RE HOME,

THINGS ARE GONNA BE DIFFERENT.

WHAT THINK YOU, WHEN YOU GET

RESTED UP, WE GO INTO BUSINESS

TOGETHER.

I'VE BEEN THINKIN' ABOUT ROOFIN'

AND TILIN'.

WOULD YOU LIKE THAT?

YEAH. THAT'D BE GREAT.

MA.

THANK YOU, MA.

( weakly ) HEY, MATTIE.

WHAT YOU DOIN'?

FOR YOU.

YOU'RE ALWAYS COLD.

( breathing heavily )

MATTIE, I'M SICK.

CAN YOU HELP ME?

ANY CHANGE IN HIS FEVER?

NO, SIR.

WHAT'S THAT?

HE SAID HE LOVED CHOP SUEY,

SO I GOT HIM SOME.

HE SAID HE LOVED CHOP SUEY,

SO I GOT HIM SOME.

COME ON, CLYDE.

( grunts )

OH.

NOW, LOOK, Y'ALL, JUST LOOK AT

HIM.

WOULD DEPRESSION OR NERVES

DO THIS TO A GROWN MAN?

WOULD THEY MAKE HIM LOSE WEIGHT,

HUH?

JUST LOOK AT HIM.

LOOK AT HIM!

WOULD NERVES MAKE HIM STOP

TALKIN' AND BECOME LIKE A BABY

OR LOSE WEIGHT OR HICCUP FOR

WEEKS?

COME ON, KIDS.

YOUR HUSBAND'S CAT SCAN

INDICATES A GLOBAL DETERIORATION

OF ALL COGNITIVE FUNCTIONS.

CAN YOU SPEAK IN PLAIN

ENGLISH?

IT MEANS HIS BRAIN HAS

SHRIVELED.

IT'S THE SORT OF THING WE FIND

IN 70-YEAR-OLD PATIENTS WITH

ALZHEIMER'S.

WELL, HONEY, I HATE TO BURST

YOUR BUBBLE, BUT CLYDE'S

A 35-YEAR-OLD TRUCK DRIVER.

IT AIN'T LIKE SOMEBODY PUT HIS

BRAINS IN THE DRYER AND JUST

LEFT IT RUNNIN'.

HAS HE EVER USED INTRAVENOUS

DRUGS?

KIDS, WHY DON'T YOU WAIT ON

OUTSIDE?

THAT'S IT, GO ON.

I'LL BE RIGHT OUT THERE. GO ON.

NOW WHAT?

HAS HE EVER USED INTRAVENOUS

DRUGS?

NO, NO. HE JUST DRINKS.

HAS HE EVER HAD SEX WITH

ANOTHER MAN?

OH, HELL, NO.

HELL, YES.

WHAT?

YOU'VE HAD SEX WITH MEN?

YEP.

OH, HE DON'T KNOW WHAT HE'S

SAYIN'. THEY GOT HIM ALL

PUMPED UP.

I LIKE SEX, VICKIE.

YOU KNOW I DO.

WITH MEN? CLYDE? YOU LIKE

SEX WITH MEN?

YEP.

YOU TWO-TIMIN' PERVERT.

MRS. TALLEY.

YOU HAD SEX WITH MY SISTER,

TOO, DIDN'T YOU?

DIDN'T YOU?!

ANSWER ME, CLYDE.

DON'T THINK I DON'T KNOW IT,

YOU TWO-TIMIN' SON OF A BITCH.

MRS. TALLEY, PLEASE.

PLEASE.

YOUR HUSBAND SHOWS SIGNS OF

AIDS-RELATED DEMENTIA,

ALTHOUGH I HAVE TO TEST HIM TO

BE CERTAIN OF THAT.

I ALSO SUGGEST WE TEST YOU,

AND YOUR SISTER, AND ANYONE ELSE

YOU FEEL WOULD BE APPROPRIATE.

OKAY.

SHIT.

HAVE YOU WASHED YOUR HANDS?

YES, RAJANI, I WASHED MY

HANDS, EVEN THOUGH IT'S NOT

PASSED THROUGH TOUCH.

I DIDN'T RECOGNIZE THIS PERSON

NEXT TO ME.

I DIDN'T REALIZE THAT RAJANI

WAS MERELY FRIGHTENED,

AS ANY WIFE OR EXPECTANT MOTHER

WOULD BE IN THOSE DAYS WHEN WE

UNDERSTOOD SO LITTLE ABOUT

AIDS.

I NEVER THOUGHT OF HOW DESERTED

SHE FELT AT HOME, WHILE I WAS

OFF PLAYING HERO.

I WANT YOU TO THINK OF THE

IMMUNE SYSTEM LIKE AN ORCHESTRA,

AND THE CD4 CELL LIKE THE

ORCHESTRA CONDUCTOR.

NOW IF THE CONDUCTOR BREAKS DOWN

OR COLLAPSES, THERE IS TOTAL

CONFUSION.

AND THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WITH

AIDS, AND THE BODY IS LEFT

VULNERABLE TO EVEN THE SIMPLEST

INFECTIONS.

BUT HOW IN THE WORLD DID

OUR GORDO GET IT?

YOU KNOW HOW HE GOT IT, MAMA,

DON'T YOU?

ALL I KNOW IS, THE GOOD LORD

DID NOT BRING HIM BACK JUST TO

TAKE HIM AWAY AGAIN.

I DON'T BELIEVE HE HAS THIS AIDS

THING, OR NOTHIN' LIKE IT.

HE'S GONNA GET BETTER.

I JUST KNOW IT.

CHESTER MEWS AND LANGDON

ARWOOD.

THEY WANTED TO BE SEEN TOGETHER.

I FIGURED YOU WOULDN'T MIND.

THEY WANNA BE EXAMINED.

I'VE ALREADY GIVEN THEM

THE BLOOD TEST.

ALL RIGHT.

THIS MOMENT, THIS WAITING ON

THE THRESHOLD OF NEW PATIENTS,

WAS ONE THAT I WOULD COME TO

KNOW WELL.

I'M DR. ABRAHAM VERGHESE.

LANGDON ARWOOD.

I'M CHESTER MEWS.

GOOD TO MEET YOU.

HAVE A SEAT.

WE'RE FROM ABINGDON.

WE'RE HERE FOR THE AIDS TEST.

I'D HAVE HAD IT DONE THERE,

BUT LANGDON REFUSED.

HE SAID HE DIDN'T WANNA BE

THE TALK OF THE TOWN.

NOT THAT WE'RE NOT ALREADY.

DOES ABINGDON HAVE A MEETING

PLACE LIKE THE CONNECTION?

OH, LORD, NO.

I WISH.

LANGDON, HAVE YOU ALWAYS

BEEN GAY?

YES, THOUGH I TRIED TO BE

STRAIGHT.

I WAS HAVIN' SEX WITH CHESTER

WHEN I WAS SEVEN.

BUT I KEPT TELLIN' MYSELF

IT WAS WRONG.

SO HE GOT MARRIED AND HAD

THREE KIDS.

YOU LEFT TOWN. WHAT WAS

I TO DO?

YOU GOT MARRIED FIRST.

THAT'S WHEN I DECIDED TO LEAVE.

SO YOU WERE CHILDHOOD

SWEETHEARTS, HUH?

SAY THAT, YES.

ARE YOU STILL MARRIED?

OH, LORDY, NO.

NO, I FINALLY HAD TO ADMIT IT.

I'M ABOUT AS STRAIGHT AS

A THREE-DOLLAR BILL.

CHESTER CAME BACK FROM NEW YORK

'CAUSE I WAS SO ALLURIN',

AND, UH, I GOT DIVORCED.

WE SET UP HOUSEKEEPIN' GOIN' ON

TWELVE YEARS NOW.

HOW OFTEN DO YOU HAVE

ANAL-RECEPTIVE INTERCOURSE?

NOT OFTEN ENOUGH.

CHESTER!

HAVE YOU HAD OTHER PARTNERS

IN THE RECENT PAST?

YEAH. CHES.

ON WEEKENDS, WE LIKE TO HAVE

WHAT WE CALL RECREATIONAL SEX.

WE LIKE TO DRIVE UP

THE INTERSTATE TO TRUCK STOPS.

THEY COME FROM EVERYWHERE.

WE CALL 'EM, WHAT IS IT?

PICKLE PACKERS.

OR PECKER PICKLERS.

ARE THEY GAY?

LORD, NO. NO.

THEY JUST WANT RELIEF.

AREN'T THERE WOMEN TURNING

TRICKS AT THESE PLACES?

YEAH. YOU BET.

WHY WOULDN'T A TRUCKER GO

WITH A WOMAN IF THAT'S WHAT HE

WANTS?

FOR ONE THING, HE'D HAVE TO

PAY FOR IT.

LORD KNOWS, HE WOULDN'T LIKE

IT HALF AS MUCH.

CHESTER, I'D LIKE TO EXAMINE

YOU NOW, IF I MAY.

YEAH.

WOULD YOU LEAN BACK FOR ME,

PLEASE?

OKAY, LOOK UP. RIGHT UP.

CAN YOU TAKE YOUR SHIRT OFF,

PLEASE?

CAN YOU TAKE YOUR SHIRT OFF,

PLEASE?

YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND, DOC.

I'M NOT WORRIED ABOUT ME.

I'M WORRIED ABOUT HIM.

HE'S BEEN REAL TIRED.

SOMETIMES AT NIGHTS, HE...

HE BREAKS INTO A COLD SWEAT,

AND HE CRIES IN HIS SLEEP.

WILL YOU TAKE CARE OF HIM, DOC?

I LOVED HIM SINCE WE WERE SEVEN

YEARS OLD.

HE IS MY LIFE.

I WOULDN'T WANNA LIVE...

( sobbing )

OKAY, HONEY, COME ON.

IT'S ALL RIGHT.

IT'S ALL RIGHT, HONEY.

I PROMISE YOU I'LL DO

MY BEST.

WHEN THE RESULTS COME IN, WE'LL

PLOT OUT A STRATEGY, OKAY?

OKAY.

IN THE MEANTIME, PLEASE TRY

NOT TO WORRY.

YOU ALL RIGHT, SWEETHEART?

LORD, I'D DIE FOR A MAN TO LOVE

ME LIKE THAT.

OH, I'M SO SORRY, HONEY.

I GOT CAUGHT UP AT THE CLINIC.

I'LL JUST RUN UPSTAIRS AND TAKE

A SHOWER. WON'T BE A MINUTE.

SAME GYM, SAME PEOPLE.

OH, DIFFERENT HOST.

NO BLOODY BOOZE.

HELLO, SIR. VIKRAM, HI.

MEET MY WIFE.

RAJANI, THIS IS VIKRAM, ONE

OF MY INTERNS.

NAMASTE.

IS THIS YOUR FIRST TIME HERE?

YES, SIR.

YOU'LL NEED SOME OF THIS.

RAJNITI! HOW ARE YOU?

SO YOU'VE GIVEN UP DANCING.

AHA, THAT'S JUST FOR NOW.

WE WERE HOPING YOU WOULD KICK

OFF THE CULTURAL PROGRAM AT

THE INDIAN INDEPENDENCE DAY

CELEBRATION.

SARYUJI, I HAVE STOPPED

PERFORMING.

I FEEL TOO OUT OF TOUCH IN

THIS COUNTRY.

NO MUSICIANS, NO COLLEAGUES.

NOW I ONLY DANCE FOR MYSELF.

VERY SELFISH OF YOU,

DEPRIVING US.

SMILING, LADIES.

SMILING, SMILING, SMILING.

VERY GOOD.

SO, HOW IS AIDS, VERGHESE?

OH, PICKING UP.

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU ARE STILL

RENTING THE HOUSE FROM V.A.

SUCH FOOLISHNESS.

YOU MUST BUY.

I LIKE OUR HOUSE, AND WE HAVE

THE MOST WONDERFUL GARDEN.

YES, YES, YES, THAT IS RIGHT,

BUT WHAT ABOUT EQUITY?

ABRAHAM, LET ME TELL YOU

SOMETHING.

IT'S BECAUSE OF YOUR

SPECIALTY...

IN SWEDEN, THORACIC SURGEONS

AND INFECTIOUS DISEASES

SPECIALISTS GET THE SAME SALARY.

THAT IS WHY WE DON'T LIVE

IN SWEDEN.

GENTLEMEN, GENTLEMEN,

GENTLEMEN, THIS WAY, PLEASE,

PLEASE, PLEASE. BE HAPPY.

SO THE UROLOGIST REMOVED

REAGAN'S PROSTATE, RIGHT?

REAGAN SAID TO HIM,

( imitating Reagan ) "IS

EVERYTHING OKAY, DOC? WILL

THE PLUMBING WORK WELL NOW?"

( interns laugh )

UROLOGIST SAID,

( Indian accent ) "SIR,

EVERYTHING'S PERFECT.

YOUR BLADDER'S FINE.

YOUR PENIS IS 100%.

YOU CAN GO OUT AND FUCK

THE COUNTRY FOR ANOTHER

FOUR YEARS!"

BUT, LIKE, WHEN YOU'RE SEEIN'

YOUR PATIENTS, DON'T THEY, LIKE,

SEE YOU AS A FOREIGNER?

I MEAN, LIKE, ISN'T IT HARD

OVERCOMIN' THAT?

ACTUALLY, NO.

IT WORKS THE OTHER WAY AROUND.

THEY TELL ME THINGS THAT THEY

WOULDN'T TELL A WHITE DOCTOR.

THEY FEEL... THEY FEEL I WON'T

JUDGE THEM.

MAYBE THEY FEEL I HAVE NO RIGHT

TO JUDGE THEM.

MY TEST CAME BACK POSITIVE,

DIDN'T IT?

YES.

YOU'RE WHAT'S CALLED AN

ASYMPTOMATIC CARRIER, VICKIE.

YOU HAVE THE VIRUS, BUT YOUR CD4

COUNT IS HIGH.

ALMOST NORMAL, IN FACT.

HOW LONG WILL I LIVE?

IF YOU QUIT SMOKING, YOU

SHOULD BE AROUND FOR SOME TIME.

WHAT, A YEAR?

TWO YEARS?

TEN YEARS?

THIS IS STILL A RELATIVELY

NEW DISEASE.

DON'T BULLSHIT ME.

IF YOU DON'T KNOW, JUST SAY SO.

THERE'S A LOT OF RESEARCH

BEING DONE.

I'M SURE THEY'LL FIND A CURE.

WHEN?

WHEN?

I DON'T KNOW.

WHAT ABOUT MY SISTER?

SHE'S POSITIVE, AS WELL.

OH, MY GOD, I KNEW IT.

I KNEW IT, I KNEW IT.

I'M SORRY.

OH, ME, TOO.

ME, TOO.

MOM?

SO WHAT IS OUR CD4 COUNT,

DOC?

LANGDON'S 500.

YOURS, I'M AFRAID, IS ONLY 30.

HEY, WHAT THE HELL, HUH?

( telephone rings )

SAY, DOC, WILL YOU HAVE

A COFFEE WITH ME?

NOW?

FORGET IT. SORRY I ASKED.

NO, NO. OF COURSE I WILL.

WHERE DO YOU WANT TO GO?

( both laughing )

SEE, DOC, I GOT NO REGRETS,

YOU KNOW.

I MEAN, I HAVE NO ONE TO BLAME

BUT MYSELF.

I'VE HAD MORE SEX THAN TEN

HETEROSEXUALS WOULD'VE HAD

IN A LIFETIME.

I WAS IN NEW YORK IN THE HEYDAY

OF BEIN' GAY--BATH HOUSES,

FIRE ISLAND, AND ALL THAT.

OH, HO, HO, HO.

I MEAN, WE FUCKED LIKE CRAZY.

AND NOW, HERE WE ARE.

I DON'T BELIEVE IT'S

A PUNISHMENT FROM GOD OR ANY

OF THAT CRAP.

I DO AGREE IT'S THE CONSEQUENCE

OF A CERTAIN LIFESTYLE.

BUT IF I WAS TO BE REBORN,

I'D WANNA COME BACK GAY.

I MEAN, NO INSULT TO YOU, DOC,

BUT MOST STRAIGHT MEN ARE

BEER-GUZZLIN' SLOTHS, AT LEAST

FROM AROUND HERE.

WHAT WAS IT LIKE FOR YOU

WHEN YOU WERE GROWING UP?

OH, THE USUAL. I HAD TO HIDE,

PRETEND I WAS STRAIGHT.

PRETEND TO LAUGH WHEN SOMEBODY

TOLD A FAGGOT JOKE.

WHEN I GOT TO NEW YORK,

WE STARTED A GROUP CALLED

THE GAY LIBERATION FRONT.

ALL OF US WERE YOUNG, FULL OF

REVOLUTIONARY SPIRIT.

I MEAN, WE WERE OUT THERE IN

YOUR FACE ALL THE TIME.

SO WHAT BROUGHT YOU BACK

TO TENNESSEE?

I MISSED LANGDON SOMETHING

AWFUL.

WHICH IS WHAT I WANNA TALK TO

YOU ABOUT.

YOU SEE, HE'S NEVER REALLY BEEN

GOOD ABOUT TAKING CARE

OF HIMSELF.

WHEN I GO...

WOULD YOU KEEP AN EYE OUT

FOR HIM?

ABRAHAM?

HMM.

ARE YOU SEXUALLY ATTRACTED

TO GAY MEN?

WHAT?

YOU HEARD WHAT I SAID.

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE ASKING

ME THIS.

I'M JUST CURIOUS.

ALL OF A SUDDEN, YOU SEEM VERY

COMFORTABLE AROUND THEM.

YOU'RE RIGHT.

IN A STRANGE WAY, I'VE COME TO

LEARN MORE ABOUT BEING A MAN

FROM GAY MEN THAN FROM STRAIGHT

MEN.

REALLY?

MEANING I'VE LEARNED THERE

ARE OTHER SIDES TO BEING A MAN.

THE ABILITY TO APPRECIATE THE

ARTS, TO REALLY LISTEN TO WOMEN

AND BEFRIEND THEM.

YOU'RE NOT TURNING SWEET ON

ME, ARE YOU?

THAT'S NOT THE POINT.

LISTEN, WITH GAY MEN, YOU'RE

LOOKING AT MEN WITHOUT THE

INFLUENCE OF WOMEN.

MEN WHO ARE NOT CONDITIONED BY

WHAT WOMEN WILL ALLOW,

WHAT WOMEN WILL ACCEPT.

MEANING WHAT?

MEANING THE SEXUAL LIFE OF

A GAY MAN IS PERHAPS WHAT

ALL MEN WOULD LIKE, IF LEFT

TO THEMSELVES.

VARIETY OF PARTNERS, ANONYMOUS

SEX.

EXCEPT THEY CAN'T GET WOMEN

TO AGREE, SO...

IS THAT WHAT YOU'D REALLY

LIKE?

BY THE WAY, THE ANSWER TO

YOUR QUESTION IS NO.

I'M ATTRACTED TO YOU.

I DON'T HAVE TIME TO WORRY

ABOUT WHAT THE NEIGHBORS THINK.

HAVE YOU HAD ANY NEGATIVE

REACTIONS FROM ANYONE?

IF THEY GOT ANYTHING NEGATIVE

TO SAY, THEY SURE BETTER NOT

SAY IT TO ME.

SOME WOMEN FROM OUR CHURCH HAVE

COME BY AND BROUGHT FOOD.

NOT THAT GORDY WANTS TO EAT

ANYTHING.

ALL HE CAN THINK ABOUT IS TO GET

BAPTIZED.

Gordon:

LAST NIGHT, I SAW

JESUS.

♪ ... BE UNBROKEN

BY AND BY, LORD, BY AND BY ♪

I WOKE UP, AND THERE WAS

THIS CLOUD AROUND MY BED.

I WASN'T DREAMIN', MIND YOU.

MY EYES WERE WIDE OPEN, AND

I COULD SEE MAMA LAYIN' THERE.

♪ WILL THE CIRCLE

BE UNBROKEN... ♪

AND A VOICE SPOKE OUT OF

THE CLOUD.

"EVERYTHING WILL BE ALL RIGHT,

GORDON."

AND OF THE HOLY SPIRIT...

AND A HAND REACHED OUT

TO ME...

HALLELUJAH!

AND I JUST KNEW IT WAS HIM.

I'M READY TO DIE, MATTIE.

I KNOW HE'S WAITIN' FOR ME ON

THE OTHER SIDE.

I KNOW HE'S WAITIN' FOR ME ON

THE OTHER SIDE.

THAT'S MY COUSIN GRACE TOOTH

WHAT DONE THAT.

Y'ALL ARE GONNA THINK I'M AWFUL,

BUT WHAT THE HELL?

SEE, THERE'S MY COUSIN GRACE.

SHE WORKS HERE AT THE HOSPITAL.

SHE DONE TOLD EVERYONE IN

CHESTER HOLLER THAT CLYDE AND

I HAVE AIDS.

PEOPLE AROUND HERE ARE SO DAMN

INQUISITIVE.

THEY WOULDN'T HESITATE TO STOP

A FUNERAL TO ASK WHAT DECEASED

THE CORPSE.

ANYWAY, GRACE AND HER HUSBAND

ANDREW, THEY BEEN GOIN' TO

THIS HOLINESS CHURCH.

I NEVER GO NO MORE.

I CAN'T TAKE ALL THAT BABBLIN'

IN TONGUES AND HOLY SPIRIT

STUFF.

OH, THAT SCARES THE SHIT OUT

OF ME.

BUT CLYDE, NOW THAT HE'S SICK,

HE'S BEEN WANTIN' TO GO.

SO GRACE STANDS UP IN CHURCH,

SHE TELLS THE WHOLE GODDAMN

CHURCH THAT CLYDE HAS AIDS,

AND WOULD THE CHURCH BE WILLIN'

FOR HIM TO COME THERE 'CAUSE HE

VERY MUCH WANTS TO.

DID YOU OR CLYDE ASK HER

TO DO THAT?

HELL, NO! SHE JUST TOOK IT ON

HERSELF TO DO IT.

AND BY THE WAY, THE CONGREGATION

SAID NO.

THEN THEY CAME TO MY HOUSE

TO TELL ME THIS.

I JUST SAID TO HER, "YOU LITTLE

DUMB ASS. WHO TOLD YOU TO GO

TALKIN' LIKE THAT?

HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF THE

SHOE WAS ON THE OTHER FOOT?

DON'T YOU EVER SET FOOT IN

MY HOUSE AGAIN OR I'LL JACK SLAP

YOUR ASS TILL KINGDOM COME."

"WELL," ANDREW SAYS, "WE'LL COME

VISIT OUR COUSIN CLYDE ANY TIME

WE PLEASE."

THAT'S WHEN I PICKED UP

THE POKER AND WENT AFTER HIM.

BUDDY, HE LIT ON OUTTA THERE

LIKE HIS PANTS WERE ON FIRE.

GRACE WAS JUST STANDIN' THERE.

I GOT SO MAD JUST LOOKIN' AT HER

FACE, I WENT AFTER HER WITH

MY FISTS.

I DROPPED HER WITH ONE SHOT,

THEN I SAT ON HER AND JUST GIVE

IT TO HER.

BUST A FEW TEETH, I RECKON.

WHOMPED HER REAL GOOD.

REMIND ME NOT TO MESS

WITH YOU.

OH, DOC, I'D NEVER DO THAT TO

SOMEONE WHO DIDN'T DESERVE IT.

VICKIE, WOULD YOU MIND

REMOVING YOUR BANDANNA, PLEASE?

I NEED TO DO A FULL EXAMINATION.

OH, I'M REAL ASHAMED

ABOUT THIS.

OH, I'M REAL ASHAMED

ABOUT THIS.

I DID IT.

I DIDN'T MEAN TO.

I JUST SAT IN THE TRAILER AND

YANKED IT OUT A HAIR AT A TIME.

THERE'S NOTHING TO BE ASHAMED

OF.

YOU'RE UNDER INCREDIBLE STRESS.

IT HAPPENS.

THERE'S EVEN A NAME FOR IT.

IT'S CALLED... CRAZY.

NO, IT'S CALLED

TRICHOTILLOMANIA.

IT'S NOT FAIR.

IT'S NOT FAIR.

I KNOW IT ISN'T.

DOOCHIE.

HEY, MATTIE.

DOOCHIE, I WANT YOU TO OPEN

UP THAT CASKET.

HMM?

WELL, MATTIE, YOU SAID YOUR

BROTHER WANTED A CLOSED CASKET.

HE WANTED IT CLOSED FOR

EVERYBODY ELSE, BUT I WANNA

SEE HE LOOKS ALL RIGHT.

YOU GO AHEAD AND OPEN IT UP.

GO AHEAD AND OPEN THE BOTTOM

HALF OF THIS CASKET.

OH, WHITE SUIT, THE WHITE SUIT.

SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER.

HIS FAVORITE.

DOOCHIE, WHY DON'T GORDON HAVE

ANY SOCKS ON?

MATTIE, WE DON'T USUALLY

PUT NO SOCKS ON.

I DON'T WANT GORDON GOIN' TO

HEAVEN WITHOUT ANY SOCKS.

YOU GO GET HIM SOME SOCKS

RIGHT NOW.

DOOCHIE! EH?

WHAT IN THE WORLD DO YOU

THINK YOU'RE GONNA CATCH

FROM HIM NOW?

YOU DONE PICKLED HIS BODY.

THERE'S NOT A BUG IN THE WORLD

THAT'S GONNA SURVIVE THAT.

WELL, MATTIE...

OKAY, JUST PUT HIS SOCKS ON.

OOH! DOOCHIE!

TAKE OFF THEM CAMPIN' GLOVES AND

YOU PUT HIS SOCKS ON RIGHT.

YOU THINK THIS IS THE LAST TIME

YOU'RE GONNA BE CALLED UPON

TO DO THIS?

NOW I WANNA SEE YOU DO IT.

OKAY. GET...!

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

LET ME HELP YOU.

THIS IS WHERE HE WANTED

TO BE BURIED.

THIS IS WHERE I'D WANT TO BE

BURIED, TOO.

THAT'S MY PLOT.

( phone ringing )

DR. VERGHESE.

DOC, CHESTER'S VERY SICK.

HE'S VERY, VERY SHORT OF

BREATH, AND HE'S RUNNIN'

A FEVER OF 104.

DR. VERGHESE, HE'S TURNIN'

BLUE ON ME.

LANGDON, LANGDON, CALM DOWN.

CALL AN AMBULANCE, TELL THEM TO

BRING YOU TO THE MEDICAL CENTER.

COME STRAIGHT TO THE EMERGENCY

ROOM, AND I'LL MEET YOU RIGHT

THERE, OKAY?

DOCTOR, NO MACHINES, PLEASE.

NO MACHINES.

WHY?

BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT HE TOLD

ME, NO MACHINES.

WHEN DID HE TELL YOU?

JUST NOW?

NO, NO, A LONG TIME AGO.

DID HE PUT IT INTO WRITING?

NO.

( Chester gasping )

GET A GOWN, GOGGLES AND MASK

READY FOR ME.

SHOULDN'T WE CALL AN

ANESTHETIST?

WE HAVE NO TIME TO FIND ONE

WHO'LL WORK ON AN AIDS PATIENT.

THIS IS DR. VERGHESE.

THESE ARE CHESTER'S BROTHERS.

CAN I TELL THEM WHAT'S

GOING ON?

TELL 'EM EVERYTHING.

CHESTER IS VERY SICK.

HE HAS AIDS.

RIGHT NOW, HE HAS A BAD

PNEUMONIA, SO I HAVE TO PUT HIM

ON A BREATHING MACHINE IN THE

NEXT FEW MINUTES OR HE WILL DIE.

BUT LANGDON TELLS ME CHESTER

HAS EXPRESSED A DESIRE NOT TO BE

PUT ON THE MACHINE.

HE SAYS HE NEVER WANTED TO BE

ON NO MACHINES.

WE NEED TO DISCUSS THIS.

WE HAVE NO TIME. I NEED TO GO

RIGHT BACK IN.

THEN PUT HIM ON THE BREATHING

MACHINE IF YOU HAVE TO.

DO EVERYTHING YOU CAN.

( Langdon weeping )

WE ARE HIS FAMILY.

WE ARE LEGALLY RESPONSIBLE

FOR HIM.

LANGDON, I HAVE TO GO IN.

( whispers ) CHES.

I HAD, WHEN IT CAME DOWN TO

THE FINAL MOMENT, GIVEN

CHESTER'S BROTHERS THE POWER OF

FAMILY, NOT LANGDON.

I, TOO, HAD BETRAYED BOTH OF

THEM, BUT THERE WAS NO TIME

TO LOOK BACK NOW.

BRING HIM DOWN.

( gurgling sounds )

COME ON, ABE, YOU CAN DO IT.

YOU CAN DO IT.

BAG HIM.

HELLO.

ALLEN, I NEED SOME HELP.

SADIE, DID YOU KNOW

INTUBATION WAS INVENTED BY

A PHYSICIAN NAMED O'DWYER

AS A LIFESAVING MEASURE IN

DIPHTHERIA?

MM-MM.

IT IS, THEREFORE, AN

INFECTIOUS DISEASES PROCEDURE.

YEAH, RIGHT.

I'LL KEEP THAT IN MIND.

( pager beeping )

( phone ringing )

DR. VERGHESE, YOUR FRIEND

ALLEN CALLED.

YOUR WIFE'S BEEN ADMITTED.

YOU'RE NEEDED IMMEDIATELY.

I WAS TOTALLY AT THE MERCY

OF GOD OR NATURE.

GIVEN ALL THAT I HAD SEEN

RECENTLY, ALL THE SUFFERING,

ALL THE SADNESS, AN EASY,

UNCOMPLICATED BIRTH SEEMED

ALMOST TOO MUCH TO HOPE FOR.

I DIDN'T HAVE TIME TO BUY YOU

A CIGAR.

CONGRATULATIONS, DOC, IT'S

ANOTHER FINE SON!

LOOK AT IT THIS WAY, DOC.

WITH A BOY, ALL YOU HAVE TO

WORRY ABOUT IS ONE DICK IN TOWN.

WITH A GIRL, YOU HAVE TO WORRY

ABOUT ALL THE DICKS IN TOWN.

WITH A GIRL, YOU HAVE TO WORRY

ABOUT ALL THE DICKS IN TOWN.

WHERE WERE YOU?

I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY.

I WAS AT AN EMERGENCY, AND

I RUSHED RIGHT OVER.

SWEETHEART, I'M SORRY YOU HAD TO

GO THROUGH THIS ALONE.

LET'S MAKE THIS A NEW BEGINNING.

I PROMISE YOU, THINGS ARE GONNA

CHANGE. THEY'LL CHANGE.

I'LL WORK HARD TO MAKE THINGS

BETTER FOR US.

FOR THE KIDS.

DON'T YOU WANT TO SEE JACOB?

WHERE IS HE?

HE'S RIGHT BEHIND YOU.

Woman on P.A.:

DR. VERGHESE,

CODE BLUE. DR. VERGHESE, CODE

BLUE.

GO, BUT YOU HAVE TO TAKE

STEPHEN WITH YOU.

COME ON, STEPHEN.

COME ON, BABY.

CLAIRE. CLAIRE!

HE'S HAD ANOTHER AMP

OF BICARB.

STOP CPR.

HE'S ASYSTOLIC.

THERE'S NO OUTPUT.

WE'VE BEEN GOIN' AT THIS

LONG ENOUGH.

LET'S CALL IT.

THANKS, EVERYBODY.

I DIDN'T THINK HIS HEART WOULD

QUIT SO QUICKLY.

I REALLY WANTED TO GIVE HIM

ANOTHER FEW MONTHS.

WELL, THEY'RE ALL GONNA DIE,

AREN'T THEY?

THERE'S NOT MUCH POINT TO THIS.

CAN YOU TELL ME WHAT'S THE

POINT IN KEEPING 90-YEAR-OLD

PATIENTS WHO ARE BRAIN DEAD

ALIVE?

OR IF YOU WERE IN THE SAME BOAT,

WOULD YOU LIKE AN EXTRA YEAR

OF LIFE?

OR WOULD YOU THINK THERE'S

NO POINT TO THAT?!

OR WOULD YOU THINK THERE'S

NO POINT TO THAT?!

PICK YOUR BATTLES, ABE.

PICK YOUR BATTLES.

♪

MALAIKA

NA KU PENDE MALAIKA

MALAIKA

NA KU PENDE MALAIKA ♪

( humming )

♪

INGGE KU OWA MALAIKA

INGGE KU OWA MALAIKA ♪

( baby crying )

( Abraham humming )

( phone ringing )

STEPHEN, CAN YOU GET

THE PHONE, PLEASE?

THANK YOU.

YES?

ABRAHAM, IT'S SARAH PRESNELL,

FROM KENTUCKY.

I'M SORRY TO BOTHER YOU AT HOME,

BUT I HAVE A SAD, SAD SITUATION

HERE.

A WONDERFUL MAN I KNOW,

LLOYD FLANDERS,

IS INFECTED WITH HIV.

NOBODY BUT ME, NOW YOU,

KNOWS THAT HE'S INFECTED.

NOT EVEN HIS SON AND DAUGHTER

KNOW.

I CAN'T TREAT HIM.

I'M WILLING TO TREAT HIM, BUT

EVERYBODY HERE KNOWS HIM.

HE'S A PILLAR OF OUR COMMUNITY.

HOW DID HE GET IT?

HE HAD A HEART ATTACK.

THEY DID OPEN-HEART SURGERY

AND GAVE HIM A TRANSFUSION,

JUST WEEKS BEFORE THEY STARTED

SCREENING BLOOD.

SO YOU WANNA SEND HIM OVER?

TONIGHT, IF IT'S OKAY

WITH YOU.

OKAY. RIGHT. VERY GOOD.

MR. FLANDERS?

OH. DR. VERGHESE.

OH, I'M JUST DELIGHTED TO

SEE YOU.

HOPE, THIS IS DR. VERGHESE.

SO NICE TO MEET YOU.

ADMIT THEM. I'LL FILL OUT

THE FORMS LATER.

YES, DOCTOR.

THANK YOU.

ALLOW ME.

THANK YOU.

OH, IT'S EASIER FOR THE QUEEN

TO SLIP OUT OF BUCKINGHAM PALACE

THAN IT IS FOR US TO BE GONE

FROM HOME.

SARAH TOLD YOU ABOUT OUR

SITUATION, DIDN'T SHE?

YES, SHE DID, MR. FLANDERS.

CALL ME LLOYD, SON.

ALL RIGHT, LLOYD.

NOBODY NEEDS TO KNOW WE

HAVE AIDS.

WE?

WHAT?

I GAVE HOPE THE VIRUS.

WE THOUGHT YOU KNEW.

BABY KEPT ME AWAKE TILL NOW.

I THINK IT COULD BE COLIC.

AS WE WALKED DOWN THAT

CORRIDOR, I FELT AS IF THEY

WERE MY PARENTS.

OR A FAVORITE UNCLE AND AUNT

WHO WERE SICK AND NEEDED

MY HELP.

AND I FELT GUILTY.

I MEAN, I NEVER ESCORT MY

PATIENTS UP TO THEIR ROOM.

I NEVER CARRY THEIR LUGGAGE.

WHY WAS I DOING ALL THIS?

MAYBE BECAUSE I, TOO, THOUGHT

THEY WERE INNOCENT VICTIMS.

MAYBE I ALSO HAVE A BLIND SPOT.

EAT. ABRAHAM.

I WONDER WHAT LIES THEY HAD

TO INVENT TO TELL THEIR

CHILDREN.

I WISH THIS DISEASE WAS GONE.

THAT YOU WERE NOT SO CLOSE

TO IT.

IT'S KIND OF BECOME WHO YOU ARE.

STEPHEN, JACOB AND I ARE LOSING

YOU TO IT.

I WISH IT WAS GONE, TOO.

( baby crying )

BUT IT'S NOT GOING TO, IS IT?

( baby crying )

BUT IT'S NOT GOING TO, IS IT?

OH!

MR. FLANDERS.

HOW WAS YOUR DAY?

THE SAME.

ALWAYS THE SAME.

PLEASE.

HOW ABOUT YOU?

OH, FINE.

YOU KNOW, I CAN'T HELP

WORRYING.

WHY?

IT'S SUCH A LONELY BUSINESS

TO CARRY THIS BURDEN.

I'M SURE YOUR CHILDREN WILL

UNDERSTAND.

YOUR CHURCH MEMBERS.

IF ANYONE IN OUR COMMUNITY

KNOWS, NEXT TIME HOPE AND I GO

TO CHURCH, IT'LL BE AN EMPTY

CHURCH.

I THINK YOU'RE WRONG.

I HAD A PATIENT HERE WHO HAD THE

SUPPORT OF JUST ABOUT EVERYBODY

IN HIS CHURCH.

I WORRY ABOUT HOPE.

WHO'S GONNA LOOK AFTER HER

THE WAY SHE'S LOOKED AFTER ME?

AFTER I DIE, I DON'T WANT HER TO

SUFFER THE STIGMA OF AIDS.

WE HAVE NO IDEA HOW OUR CHILDREN

WILL REACT TO THIS.

HOW WILL OUR SON-IN-LAW FEEL

ABOUT US BEING WITH HIS

CHILDREN?

IT SEEMS SUCH A SHAME TO BE

WASTING SO MUCH ENERGY ON

KEEPING UP THIS SECRET.

THE TWO OF YOU ARE SO ALONE--

ABRAHAM, I DON'T THINK YOU

UNDERSTAND.

WE ARE NOT ALONE.

THE ONE UNSHAKEABLE PRESENCE

IN OUR LIFE IS CHRIST.

I PERSONALLY BELIEVE THAT THIS

VIRUS IS FROM HELL.

IT IS NOT FROM GOD.

AND I MEAN TO FIGHT IT WITH ALL

I HAVE.

OH, IT'LL GET ME IN THE END, BUT

NOT WITHOUT A FIGHT.

I WILL NEVER GIVE IN. NEVER.

WHAT?

NOTHING.

LIKE HELL, NOTHIN'.

( trailer rattles )

THAT'S JUST CLYDE TURNIN'

IN BED.

YOU COULD FEEL A TICK BURP

IN HERE.

IT DON'T TAKE MUCH TO SHAKE

THAT TRAILER.

HOW ARE THINGS BETWEEN YOU

AND HIM, VICKIE?

ARE YOU STILL ANGRY WITH CLYDE?

WELL, I CAN'T GET ANGRY

NO MORE.

SEE, I LOVE THE MAN.

CAN'T HELP IT.

I ALWAYS HAVE.

COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO, I LOST IT

WITH HIM, THOUGH.

I WAS AT THE STOVE, FIXIN'

OATMEAL, WHEN HE PIPES UP,

"HELL, I THINK I MIGHT JUST GO

AROUND AND GIVE THIS TO AS MANY

PEOPLE AS I CAN, SEEIN' AS HOW

SOMEONE DONE GAVE IT TO ME."

I WAS SO SHOCKED, I ALMOST HIT

THE FLOOR.

I HAD THE OATMEAL IN MY HAND,

IT WOULDN'T HAVE TAKEN MUCH FOR

ME TO FLING IT AT HIM.

BUT I SAID, "CLYDE, YOU DONE

ALREADY PUT THE DEATH SENTENCE

ON TWO PEOPLE.

DON'T YOU DARE THINK ABOUT IT,

OR I'LL KILL YOU MYSELF, YOU

SON OF A BITCH."

I ASKED MYSELF, WHAT WOULD

IT BE LIKE TO BE IN VICKIE'S

SHOES?

COULD I HAVE REACTED LIKE

SHE DID?

WOULD I HAVE HAD HER COURAGE?

Clyde: CHANGE CHANNELS.

CHANGE CHANNELS!

SPEAK OF THE DEVIL.

I BET HE'S MESSED HIS PANTS,

TOO.

CHANGE CHANNELS!

OKAY, CLYDE.

CHANGE CHANNELS!

OKAY, CLYDE, I'M COMIN'.

I'M CHANGIN', I'M CHANGIN'.

CALM DOWN.

THERE.

THERE'S BUGS BUNNY.

THERE HE IS.

HOW ARE YOU TODAY?

CLYDE?

ZOO.

HE STARES AT THE TUBE DAY

AND NIGHT.

IF I TURN IT OFF, EVEN WHEN HE'S

DOZIN', HE WAKES UP MADDER THAN

A WET NEST OF HORNETS.

I WANNA GO TO THE ZOO.

WE'RE ALREADY THERE, BABY.

OH, ONE OF MY PATIENTS

STARTED THIS SUPPORT GROUP

FOR PEOPLE WITH AIDS.

I THOUGHT MAYBE YOU AND CLYDE

COULD TRY ONE OF THEIR MEETINGS.

I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH CLYDE WILL

GET OUT OF IT, BUT IT MIGHT

HELP YOU.

WHAT, YOU WANT ME TO SIT

THERE AND TALK WITH A BUNCH

OF QUEERS?

TRY IT. THIS DISEASE IS TOO

MUCH TO CARRY ALONE.

HELL, I AIN'T CARRYIN' IT

ALONE.

EVERYONE IN THIS HOLLER KNOWS.

I WISH THEY DIDN'T, BUT THEY DO.

HEY, DOC, YOU EVER SEEN ONE

OF THESE?

IT'S CALLED HEARTS A-BUSTIN'.

IT'S ALSO CALLED SWAMP DOGWOOD,

BUT I DON'T CARE FOR THAT MUCH.

HEARTS A-BUSTIN'.

THAT'S PRETTY MUCH HOW I FEEL

SOMETIMES ABOUT WHAT'S HAPPENIN'

TO ME.

ABRAHAM, YOU'VE GOT IT NOW.

NO, NO.

( screaming )

I'M A DOCTOR.

A SCIENTIST TRAINED IN

PROFESSIONAL DETACHMENT.

ALL THE USUAL POSTURES SEEM LIKE

A JOKE IN THE FACE OF AIDS.

SOMETIMES, I FIND MYSELF

THINKING, WHAT IF I WAS

A CARDIAC SURGEON?

WHAT IF I EARNED A MILLION

DOLLARS A YEAR?

WHAT IF I WAS A RADIOLOGIST

WHO PIPES MUSIC THROUGH INTO

HIS OFFICE, AND HAS A GAME OF

GOLF READY FOR HIM EVERY

AFTERNOON AT THE COUNTRY CLUB?

YOU KNOW WHAT I BELIEVE,

ABRAHAM?

I BELIEVE THAT IT WAS PART OF

CHRIST'S INTERVENTION, THAT WHEN

WE CAME TO JOHNSON CITY FOR

TREATMENT, WE FOUND YOU.

TO US, YOU'RE LIKE A MESSENGER

FROM ANOTHER WORLD.

TO US, YOU'RE LIKE A MESSENGER

FROM ANOTHER WORLD.

MY LIFE IS SLIPPING DOWNHILL

FASTER THAN I CAN HANDLE.

I CAN'T SEEM TO JUGGLE IT

ANYMORE.

MY CASELOAD.

MY WIFE.

MY SANITY.

RAJANI TREATS AIDS LIKE IT'S

A MISTRESS THAT'S TAKING ME AWAY

FROM HOME, SO I CAN'T EVEN

TALK ABOUT IT WHEN I'M AT HOME.

I FEEL AS TAINTED BY THIS

DISEASE AS MY PATIENTS ARE.

YOU KNOW, WHEN I CAME HERE

TWO YEARS AGO, I...

I FINALLY THOUGHT I'D FOUND

MY OWN COUNTRY.

NOWADAYS, DEATH SURROUNDS ME.

ALL THE JOY HAS DISAPPEARED.

I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL.

I MYSELF HAVE LOST ALL LIBIDO.

WHAT WAS ONCE AN ACT OF LOVE

AND JOY...

AN ACT OF LIFE,

HAS BECOME AN ACT OF DEATH

FOR ME.

THERE'S NOTHING FOR ME NOW...

BUT HORROR.

( sobbing )

( Indian music playing )

( crying )

YOUR PATIENT VICKIE CALLED

AN HOUR AGO.

HER HUSBAND CLYDE...

JUST PASSED AWAY.

I COULD THINK ONLY OF ALL

THE INEVITABLE CALLS TO COME,

AND I WANTED TO RUN.

I'VE BEEN MARRIED TO THE MAN

FOR SO LONG, GOD, I COULD READ

HIS MIND.

I SAID, "IT'S ALL RIGHT, HONEY.

GO ON. IT'S ALL RIGHT.

GOD LOVES YA.

GO ON, CLYDE."

AND THEN, HE OPENED HIS EYES

AS IF HE'D SEEN OR HEARD

SOMETHING RIGHT ABOVE HIM,

AND, OH, THAT WAS IT.

I WANNA THANK YOU, DOC.

GOD, YOU'VE ALWAYS BEEN THERE

FOR ME.

OH, VICKIE.

VICKIE, VICKIE.

VICKIE.

YOU'VE NEVER BEEN SOMEONE I'VE

THOUGHT OF AS A PATIENT I'M PAID

TO HELP.

YOU'VE ALWAYS BEEN MORE LIKE

A SISTER TO ME.

A VERY BRAVE SISTER.

WELL, WE ALL GOTTA DIE

SOMETIME, RIGHT?

HMM.

OH, GOOD TO SEE YOU!

OH, YES!

DR. VERGHESE, I'D LIKE YOU TO

MEET MY GRANDDAUGHTER

WILHELMINA.

HELLO, WILHELMINA.

HI. CAN I GO IN AND SEE

GRANDDAD?

HE'S WAITIN' FOR YOU. GO ON.

I TOLD THEM.

I TOLD THEM THE TRUTH.

YOUR SON AND DAUGHTER?

YES.

I DIDN'T WANT LLOYD TO DIE ALONE

WITHOUT OUR FAMILY BY HIS SIDE,

SO I MADE THE DECISION.

DIDN'T TELL HIM.

WENT TO THE PHONE AND CALLED.

COME IN AND MEET THEM.

I THINK I'M READY TO GO HOME,

ABRAHAM.

THAT'S FINE WITH ME.

DR. VERGHESE, WE APPRECIATE

WHAT YOU DO HERE.

IT'S JUST THAT, AIDS PATIENTS

ARE SUCH A BIG DRAIN ON

OUR FUNDS.

THIS CHESTER MEWS, FOR EXAMPLE,

COST US $85,000.

THE LIST DOES GO ON.

WOULD IT BE FAIR TO SAY THAT

PART OF THE REASON WE HAVE SO

MANY AIDS PATIENTS IS BECAUSE

OF YOUR REPUTATION?

ARE YOU SUGGESTING WE TURN

THEM DOWN?

AS A COMMUNITY HOSPITAL

WHICH TAKES PUBLIC FUNDS,

ARE YOU NOT OBLIGED TO ACCEPT...

NO, I'M NOT SAYIN' WE SHOULD

TURN THEM DOWN.

I JUST DON'T KNOW THAT WE SHOULD

GO OUT OF OUR WAY TO ATTRACT

THEM, EITHER.

DR. VERGHESE, YOU'VE DRAWN

PATIENTS FROM THREE DIFFERENT

STATES TO THIS HOSPITAL.

RIGHT NOW, I HAVE 82 CASES

IN A SMALL TOWN IN THE MIDDLE

OF NOWHERE.

IN FIVE YEARS' TIME, YOU'LL BE

LOOKING AT 600 CASES,

AND THEY WON'T ALL BE GAY.

AND WHEN THIS DISEASE STARTS

KILLING STRAIGHT PEOPLE,

I HOPE YOU'RE READY.

LET'S SEE. LET'S SEE IF AIDS

JUST DISAPPEARS LIKE THEY HOPE

IT WILL.

THEY ACTUALLY THINK I'M BRINGING

AIDS TO THEIR HOSPITAL,

DISRUPTING THEIR PRECIOUS

BOTTOM LINE, THEIR BIRTHING

SUITES, THEIR ONE-DAY SURGERY

CENTER, THEIR HIGH-TECH

MONEY-MAKING RUBBISH!

JUST BECAUSE I'M NOT A PROFIT

CENTER, MY PATIENTS SIMPLY

DON'T MATTER.

HELL, IN OTHER HOSPITALS, THEY

GOT... THEY GOT WHOLE TEAMS

OF DOCTORS.

HERE, I'M TREATING 82 PATIENTS

ON MY BLOODY OWN!

RELAX, DOC.

HAVE A BEER.

YOU GOT ANYTHING STRONGER?

UH-HUH.

I WANNA GET SMASHED.

ALL THE WAY TO THE TOP.

GIMME ONE OF THOSE.

I DIDN'T KNOW, ALLEN.

I DIDN'T KNOW.

I DIDN'T REALIZE HOW DEVASTATED

I WOULD FEEL TO WATCH MY

PATIENTS DIE.

MAYBE IT'S TIME TO LEAVE.

TAKE A BREAK, FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE.

START FRESH SOMEPLACE ELSE.

I DON'T BLAME YOU, DOC.

I DON'T SEE HOW YOU DO IT

DAY AFTER DAY.

HELL, I BLOW AN ENGINE, IT

BREAKS MY HEART, AND IT'S JUST

AN ENGINE, IT'S NOT A LIFE.

NO, I CAN'T SAY AS I BLAME YOU.

YOU KNOW, I WOULDN'T WANNA

SEE YOU GO.

( playing guitar )

♪ DO YOU LOVE ME?

DO YOU LOVE ME?

YEAH, DO YOU LOVE ME?

DO YOU LOVE ME?

DO YOU LOVE ME?

YEAH, DO YOU LOVE ME?

DO YOU LOVE ME?

OH, HEY, HEY, HEY

YEAH, YEAH ♪

( humming )

♪ DO YOU LOVE ME?

DO YOU LOVE ME?

DO YOU LOVE ME?

DO YOU LOVE ME?

DO YOU LOVE ME? ♪

MERRY CHRISTMAS, DOC.

( baby crying )

STEPHEN, DO YOU KNOW WHO CAME

LAST NIGHT?

DO YOU KNOW WHO CAME LAST NIGHT?

SANTA CAME LAST NIGHT.

HE CAME DOWN THROUGH THAT

CHIMNEY, AND HE SAYS, "HO HO

HO!" AND YOU KNOW WHAT HE

BROUGHT FOR YOU?

ISN'T THAT WHAT YOU WANTED?

YOU WANT TO OPEN IT NOW?

NO. NOT YET.

YOU DON'T WANNA OPEN IT NOW.

STEPHEN, STEPHEN, I WANT YOU TO

BE A GOOD BOY.

GIVE MEENA AUNTIE MY LOVE,

AND WISH HER A MERRY CHRISTMAS

FOR ME, OKAY?

OKAY.

WHERE'S MY KISS?

SEE YOU ON MONDAY, DA-DA.

SEE YOU ON MONDAY.

DRIVE CAREFULLY.

CALL ME WHEN YOU ARRIVE.

I WANTED TO CALL OUT TO HER,

BUT DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.

WORDS COULDN'T FIX US.

OUR LIVES HAD CHANGED.

THE STRAIN IN OUR MARRIAGE

HAD BECOME FAMILIAR.

I HAD LIVED FOR SO LONG IN

A CULTURE OF DISEASE THAT I'D

BECOME A STRANGER TO MY OWN

FAMILY.

BECOME A STRANGER TO MY OWN

FAMILY.

HI.

HIYA, SADIE. WHAT'S NEW?

WELL, LAST NIGHT, I WENT OUT

AND GOT MYSELF A LITTLE BLACK

DRESS. CREPE NUMBER.

THAT'S WHAT'S NEW?

I HAVE THIS MIRROR ON MY

CEILING, AND I LOOKED AT MYSELF

IN IT.

DAMN, IT MADE ME HOT.

I'M IN THE PHONE BOOK.

I FELT LIKE A DEATH CAMP

INMATE.

IN THIS SETTING, WHAT DID

A FRIENDLY FLING...

A QUICKIE, MATTER?

( muttering ) CAROL.

CAROL.

YES, SIR.

DO YOU HAVE YOUR CAR TODAY?

UH-HUH. WHY?

WILL YOU DRIVE ME?

I WANT TO TAKE ALL THE PATIENT

RECORDS HOME.

WHY?

CAROL, HAVE YOU EVER WONDERED

WHERE OUR 80-ODD PATIENTS

HAVE COME FROM?

UH-UH. I CAN'T SAY I HAVE.

THINK ABOUT IT.

TWO YEARS AGO, THERE WAS NO AIDS

IN THESE PARTS.

THE ENTIRE GAY POPULATION

TESTED NEGATIVE.

SO?

SO, I DON'T KNOW, BUT I HAVE

A HUNCH, I'M GONNA FIND OUT.

YEAH.

YEAH!

ALL THOUGHTS OF THE LITTLE

BLACK DRESS HAD FADED.

ABRAHAM.

WHAT'S ALL THIS?

TAKE A LOOK AT THIS.

I'VE JUST DISCOVERED A PARADIGM

WHICH MIGHT BE TRUE FOR OTHER

RURAL AREAS, AS WELL.

HIV IN TENNESSEE IS LARGELY AN

IMPORTED DISEASE, IMPORTED

TO THE COUNTRY FROM THE CITY.