My Mother, the Spy (2000) - full transcript

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

[HUFFING]

ALISON:
Today'’s my birthday.

I'’m not usually
a big birthday person,

but this one feels different.

Something big
s gonna happen.

I don'’t know how I know this,
but I do.

Erbe!

Well, if it isn'’t
the birthday girl.

Yeah. Where'’s
my diamond bracelet?

Hey, must have
gotten lost in the mail.



Here.

What? No card?

Get out of here,
you'’re blocking my line.

Well, no jewelery
or insight from Erbe,

but if I can get through
my first meeting
with George Trumbell,

the best-selling author
who eats editors like me
for lunch,

then anything is possible.

Happy birthday.Thank you.

New suit?Yeah, you like?

Everything but the shoes.

Oh, package from your mom.I can see that.

China? Is she
with the Rabbi?

Yes.Oh, God,
I love your mother.

I can'’t get mine
to leave New Jersey.



Aren'’t you
going to open it?

Knock yourself out.

You ready for Trumbell?

Are you? You know,
he'’s gone through
eight editors in four years.

Hope you haven'’t
gotten too attached
to a paycheck.

Oh, thanks for
your vote of confidence.

Listen, we have to
be done by 2:00.

I got a meeting with Dupre
out on Long Island.

No problem. I have to
go water my mother'’s plants.
I can drop you on the way.

Only if you promise to bring
the car to a complete stop
before I get out.

Forget it.

"Dear Alison,
this is a birthday Buddha.

Rub his belly for good luck.
Sorry I couldn'’t be there.
Love, Mom."

Oh, that is so sweet.

Very. Just stick it with
the other "Sorry I couldn'’t
be there" gifts.

You ever wonder if there'’s
something going on between
your mother and the Rabbi?

What? No. Gross.

You'’ve never met him.
He... he could be handsome
and charming.

My mother is not
having sex with the Rabbi.

[INTERCOM BEEPS]WOMAN:
George Trumbell is here.

Hah. Uh...

Okay, put him in
the Conference Room.
We'’ll be right there.

[EXHALING] Ready?

For degradation,
humiliation,
and annihilation?

It won'’t be so bad.

[TRUMBELL CLEARS THROAT]
For the record,
I despise you people.

What makes you think
you qualify to review my work?

The B-plus on
your eighth grade
Edith Wharton paper,

or is it your undistinguished
career at some minor college
in the Midwest?

TRUMBELL: You lead a life
without risk or imagination,

you will, no doubt, marry,
procreate, and talk incessantly
about your days in publishing,

we can only hope
they will be few.

So... [CLEARS THROAT]

Page one.

Yeah, the seduction scene,
it'’s... it's all over the place.

Obviously you'’ve
never been seduced.

ALISON: So, now, if we
change the seduction

and cut the dream--[TRUMBELL] Dream stays.

It'’s all story. Genius,
but all story.

I'’ll never cut the dream.

It'’s all story for this book,
but it would be brilliant
at the beginning of a sequel.

ALISON: It'’d redefine
the genre...

[INDISTINCT TALK]

I'’m leaving. I've
already spent way
too much time here.

In chapter 12, you'’ve Rupert
jump-starting the engine
with his eyeglass frames.

Wouldn'’t he need
to strip the wires
with his teeth first?

No.You can stick anything in
the ignition, are you sure?

I have sold 100 million
books worldwide.

I'’m sure.

You kicked butt.

[TIRES SCREECHING]

[SCREAMING]

Just tell me one thing,

did we hit
the kindergarten class
on 91st?

Would you relax?

Would you slow down?All right, all right.

Just keep it under 80.

[TIRES SCREECHING, HONKING]

Okay.

So...

what are you and Peter
gonna do for your birthday?

A dinner at our
favorite Indian place.

[TIRES SCREECHING]Move, you idiot!

God!

I think he'’s
gonna propose.

[BLOWS RASPBERRY]What is that
supposed to mean?

You know what it means.

All Peter ever thinks about
is Peter and his book.

You don'’t like him, do you?

The man barely
acknowledges
that you'’re dating.

Look, I have nothing
against Peter,

I just think
he'’s not for you.

Left up here.I know.

Left.I know.

[HORN TOOTING]

[MAN SCREAMING]

Well, he said he had
something very important
that he wanted to ask me,

something that would
change our future.

That doesn'’t
mean marriage.

He used the word, "our."
He'’s talking in the plural.

Oh, that'’s wonderful, Alison.
I'’m, uh, very happy for you.

I know what a struggle
he'’s had with pronouns.

[BOTH SCREAM]

Mom, what are you
doing here?I live here!

But you'’re supposed
to be in China.

I came home early.
You scared me.

You scared me!

I thought the house
was broken into.Bite your tongue.

What are you doing here?
Did you get my Buddha?

I came to check on the plants.
Yes, he'’s wonderful.

What are you doing here
in the middle of the day?

You didn'’t get fired,
did you?

No, I didn'’t get fired.
Why do you always
expect the worst?

Because then
I'’m never disappointed.

Oh, no, look what happened
to my little baby. It'’s gone.

How'’s Peter?

He'’s fine. Did it ever
occur to you that I'’m
really good at my job?

Of course you are,
but that doesn'’t
guarantee job security.

Look what happened
to Alan Heisenberg.

He got hit by a truck.

On his way
to a matinee,

which he wouldn'’t have
been going to if he
hadn'’t been downsized.

Well, I haven'’t been fired.
In fact, I just had a big
meeting with George Trumbell.

Oh! Who'’s he?

Look But Don'’t Touch,
Better Dead Than Sorry,
Spies, Blood and Water...

Oh, yes, yes, yes,
he writes those spy novels.

I can'’t read them.
They confuse me.Oh.

Oh, but darling, I know
he'’s a big deal in your
business. Congratulations.

I'’m editing his next one,
Death Succumbs Her.

I... I kicked butt.

Darling, don'’t
talk like that.

Is that what you wore
at the meeting?

Yeah.

Your hair looks nice.

How'’s Grandma?

Grandma is fabulous!

Grandma!Surprise.

Hi, darling.

GLORIA: I was just
about to call you.

Hello, dear.

Mother, what
are you doing here?

Oh, I'’m breaking in
a new pair of hiking boots.

How was your trip?

Fine.

Did you get to see
everything you wanted?

I always do.

Is that what you wore
on the plane?

Well, I gotta, uh,
get back to the office.

Wait a minute,
not so fast.

I have a surprise.

ALISON: What?

Happy birthday,
sweetheart.

What is it?

It'’s three days
and two nights at
the Royal Bahamas,

for you and your mother.

What?What? No.

Remember the time
I took you on a trip
for your birthday?

Well I thought we could
continue the tradition.

No.

I mean, I mean, uh...

Alison couldn'’t possibly
take time off her job now--

ALISON: Mom is exhausted
after her trip. Right?Totally.

I'’m wiped out.Oh, nonsense.

Eric can cover for you.

And as for you,

well, the nice thing
about China is after two hours,
you'’re ready to travel again.

Mom...Oh, no, it'’ll be fun.

You two have never
gone away together.

Mother, I said no!

Well...

I mean, yes,
I guess, uh...

we'’re gonna be spending
some time in the Bahamas.

Fun.Fun.

Fun.

[HORN TOOTING]

[TRADITIONAL CHINESE
MUSIC PLAYING]

Come on, sweetheart,
please don'’t be like this.

It doesn'’t matter that
we couldn'’t get into Saheev's
without a reservation.

I love our
Chinese place.

Since when do they
only take reservations?

They'’ve always
been that way. I... I just
always made them.

I should have told you.

Well.

ALISON: Oh...

How sweet.

When did you tell them
it was my birthday?

I didn'’t.

Happy birthday,
Miss Alison.

Thank you, Gom Chi.

It'’s very thoughtful.

Isn'’t that thoughtful?

Uh, I guess we should
do that, um, present thing.

Oh.

I didn'’t have time
to wrap it.

That'’s all right.
Saves paper.

A vase?

How sweet.

I saw it and it
reminded me of you.

Really? What part?

What?

What part of the vase
reminded you of me?

Well, it... it was
so contained,

uh, no, it was so simple.

Look, I don'’t know.
I just thought...

I saw it, I thought
you'’d like it.

I do, I do.
Thank you. I love it.

Oh, good. [CHUCKLES]

I love you.

So, uh...

Shall we, uh,
blow this joint?

Wasn'’t there
something else?

Was there?

You said there was something
you wanted to ask me,

something that would
change our future.

Oh! No, I was gonna
ask you later.

Oh. Don'’t
wanna rush you.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Um, I... I can ask here.

[EXHALES AND CLEARS THROAT]

Uh, Alison...

We... we'’ve been together
for a couple of years now,

and, um, yes, we'’ve had
our ups and downs,

but, um...

I... I'’ve really
come to trust you.

[EXHALES DEEPLY]

It'’s okay, sweetheart.

Close your eyes.

[CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY]

Okay.

[EXHALES DEEPLY]

Alison, will you--

Yes!read my book?

That... that'’s what
you wanted to ask me?

What did you think
I was going to ask?

Uh... I thought
you were
gonna propose.

M--Marriage?Yes!

Are you out
of your mind?

Why, because I wanna
marry the man I love,
and start our life together?

Well, that makes
absolutely no sense.

Alison, I...I...

I haven'’t established
myself yet.

I mean, I can'’t
even afford a...

I can'’t even
afford a cellphone.

But I know you'’re
gonna be successful.

I know that.
That'’s not the point.

Uh...

[STAMMERS AND MUMBLES]

Oh, Peter, Peter...

This is your check.

[SIRENS WAILING]

[BREATHING HEAVILY]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

MAN: Achmed!

Achmed!

Doctor Dupre'’s
love pattern,number nine,

"You are attracted to people
whose behavior is familiar."

Meaning?

Well, your mother
used to disappear a lot,

so you find men like Peter,
who are here one minute,
then gone the next.

ALISON: My mother
would never "disappear."

She would
leave unexpectedly,

but that'’s 'cause she'’d
always fly standby.

It doesn'’t matter.Oh, what about David?

David lives in Chicago.
He'’d visit, and then
he'’d go home.

Here, not here.All right. Mark?

Mark keeps slipping
in another coma.

He wasn'’t in a coma,
he was just quiet.

Ah. Here, not here.

[ELEVATOR DINGS]

Where are you going?

I told you.
To the Royal Bahamas
with my mother.

Yeah. Yeah.
And Lucy'’s gonna get
Charlie Brown the football.

ALISON: Bye.

[SOFT GUITAR PLAYING]

Hi.

That'’d do it?

My daughter'’s
editing his next book.

WOMAN: We'’re a little
bit late. Come on.

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATION]

Oh, no.

No, Marty, you can'’t
do this to me.

It'’s urgent.

I am not going.
I promised her I would
take her on this trip.

And you will,
in three days time.

In the meantime,
we need you in Dinora.

ANNOUNCER SPEAKING:

WOMAN: Only $770, sir.

I'’m sorry.

I'’m trying again.

ANNOUNCER:
Attention, all passengers...

[HONKING]

[TIRES SCREECHING]

[DOOR OPENS]

What happened this time?

Uncle Leo.
You uncle Leo,

he was deep-sea fishing
and had a terrible accident.

And your mother had to
go over immediately.

Off to where?

Dinora.

The Azores?

I don'’t believe this.

Look, honey, forget her.

You and I will
go together. Look.

I'’m all packed.

Just take me back
to the city.

Are you sure?

How could you
do this to me?

Your mother really
wanted to go with you--

Just take me back
to the city.

[BIRDS CHIRPING]

This is not the city.

Do me a favor, Grandma.
Next time you get me
a birthday present,

can you make it
a small appliance?

Alison...

No, I really believed her
this time. I feel so stupid!

Alison, don'’t do this
to yourself.

I have something for you.

Grandma, stop.

You are not gonna smooth
things over for her again.

I do not want you telling me
how wonderful I am,

and I don'’t want
any more presents.

What is it?

Uruz.

It means "strength."

Here.

It'’s the rune

of termination
and new beginnings.

It means that the life
you'’ve been leading

has outgrown its form.

It'’s been handed down
in our family
for generations.

Turn around.

Grandma, what
are you talking about?

Well, I think it'’s time.

For what?

Time for you and the rest
of the world to know

how truly
remarkable you are.

Would you cut it out?

This is not to be
taken lightly.

I wouldn'’t have
given it to you if I hadn'’t
thought you were ready.

Ready for what?

I think that'’s something
your mother should tell you.

Anyway, a little intrigue is
good for the complexion, huh?

[LIVELY MUSIC PLAYING]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Thank you.

Mom.

[TURNTABLE SCRATCHES]

Mom.

Alison?

Surprise.

What are you
doing here?

Thought maybe
I could help.

Help Uncle Leo.Who?

[STAMMERING] Who...
who knows. The doctors
said he'’s dying, actually.

Which is why I'’m here.
Hi, I'’m the Rabbi.

Yes, this is the Rabbi.

Hello, Rabbi.
So, he'’s okay?

GLORIA: No, yes.

You'’re the Rabbi?

Uh, yes.

I'’m glad to see you finally
got those braces out.

Rabbi, why don'’t you go and
get the car, bring it around?
I'’ll be right out. Okay?

Will do. Excuse me.

Um...

Sun. It'’s not good to stand
directly under the sun rays.

You know it'’s not good
for your skin. Why don'’t we
go here and find a lil'’ shade?

ALISON: I don'’t remember
an Uncle Leo.

GLORIA: Oh, he was
on your father'’s side.

Um, does your grandmother
know you'’re here?

She drove me to the airport.Oh, how helpful.

Dad had three sisters.

Yeah, yeah.
He was married
to one of them.

It was a first marriage.
It was annulled. I mean,
does it really matter?

Yes, it really matters.

Can you tell me why
going to tend to
a sick uncle

who was in the family
thirty years ago,
for ten minutes

is more important
than taking a trip
with your daughter,

for the first time ever?

Mom, come on.
What'’s going on here?

Are you...

are you and
the Rabbi dating?

What?

What a relief.

Oh! It'’s finally out
in the open.

The Rabbi and I
are dating.

You are? I see.

Okay then.

GLORIA: The Rabbi and I
have to pick up some art
before the store closes,

but we can discuss this
over dinner.

Okay, honey, I... I am
so sorry that you had to
find out this way.

Are you all right?

I'’m fine. I'm all right.
I'’m just shocked.

But not really.
I mean...

I suspected,
but the reality is...

Oh!

Sweetheart.

...so surreal.

I told Ali
the truth.

You did?Yes, I... I told her
about us dating.

RABBI: Sweetheart, uh,
I'’ve got the car out front.

We'’re gonna be late.

Gimme just a minute.Just...

You know, honey,
why don'’t you just...

change into a...

into a suit
or something,
you know?

Relax by the pool.
You could use
a little color--

Where did you get this?

Grandma gave it to me.
She said you'’d tell me about--It wasn'’t hers to give.

Give it back to me.

But--Please give it to me now.

Okay.

This is not some silly
little piece of jewelry.

It wasn'’t hers to give,
and she knows that.

Now I'’ve got
to go right now,

but I'’ll be back
and we'’ll...

uh, don'’t forget dinner.

[LIVELY MUSIC PLAYING]

GLORIA: I am absolutely
gonna kill Mother.

Really, I don'’t know
what'’s gotten into her.

She'’s never done anything
like this before.

Was Arturo okay?
Was he suspicious?

He was very suspicious.

I had to tell him
Alison was your daughter.

What?And that the two of you
were going on vacation

after our business
was concluded.

You what?I had to.

Ugh!

I will never
use Alison.

Do you understand me?

Never!

Listen to me. I will call
everything off before
I involve my daughter.

Are we clear?

Very.Good.

[SITAR MUSIC PLAYING]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

This is highly irregular.

I should not even
be talking to you.

We know. We'’re so sorry
for the misunderstanding
this afternoon.

Okay.

This whole transaction
has been fraught with delays.

Our previous buyer met
with a very sudden...

death.

Oh.

How unfortunate.

The sudden appearance
of your daughter was
very disturbing.

You are going
on a vacation?

Where?The Bahamas.
We'’re very excited.

When can we
see the statue?

Soon.

So, as per
your instruction,

a half a million down.

Problem?

No.

We'’ll leave after dark.

[BIRDS CHIRPING]

Oh. Hi, Peter. It'’s me.

Uh, listen. It'’s
a long story but

I'’m in Dinora,
the Casa de la Mare.

I'’m sorry about the fight.

When you get in or, um,

back or whatever, just give
me a call and let me
know you'’re okay. Okay?

I love you. Bye.

Oh. It'’s Alison.

Just kidding.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

There'’s a slight
change in plans.

You stay. She goes.What?

We were under
the impression

that we would
both be allowed
to verify the product.

Right.

Sorry. Are we
on or not?

If you go alone, you might
not make it back in time
to meet our friends.

Oh, I'’m sure
they'’d understand.

As a matter of fact,
I'’m sure they'd insist.

Gloria.Let'’s go.

Gloria...If I'’m not back
in two hours,

you get Alison out of here
and make her arrangement.

Let'’s go.

[SERENE INSTRUMENTAL
MUSIC PLAYING]

MAN 1: Okay,
I got the Davidsons
at eight o'’clock.

What else you got?

MAN 2: I have the Cowens
coming in 8:30 for you.

It'’s their 50th birthday
party and there'’s ten people.

Good.

Any messages for me?

Um...

I don'’t know.

Who are you?

[SNORTS]

Alison Shaeffer.

Daughter of Gloria Shaeffer,

who is now
dating the Rabbi.

No. I'’m sorry.

Are you expecting a call?

[SCOFFS] Just from
the good for nothing
love of my life,

who, at this moment,
in our relationship

I should be
calling my fiance,

but I'’m not
holding my breath.

Man trouble, huh?

Well, we can'’t have that,
can we, Alonzo?

You know, there'’s
a special event going on
in the hotel tonight.

It'’s the perfect remedy.

It really will be
a lot of fun.

Dinora is the place where
all your troubles disappear.

Everybody calls me Sid.

Come on, it'’ll be fun!

Come on.

[PEOPLE CHEERING]

I don'’t limbo.

Oh, of course you can.
You ever try to?

Uh, not since
Stacy Holder'’s
birthday party.

Well, now you can dance
without worrying what
the boys will think.

ALISON: Nice try.

SID: Oh, come on. You'’ll be
surprised at what you can do.

Especially after
one of these.

[CHUCKLES]

Mm. Yummy.

Look at this guy.
He'’s worth over
two million dollars.

Who, this guy?Yeah.

Started the world'’s
first Internet
dating service.

Wow.

Woo. She'’s good.

SID :Yeah.
Rocket scientist at NASA.

ALISON: No way!

SID: Oh, yeah. Dinora.

The place where appearances
can sometimes be deceiving.

I thought it was Dinora,
the place where all
troubles would disappear.

Yeah. Well, we'’re
a multi-model country.

Come on!Your turn.

[LAUGHING]

Outstanding. You'’re a ringer.
I think you broke
the hotel record.

Nah. I missed by
a quarter inch!

You rocked!

Maybe I'’m not what
I appear to be either.

Hmm. No one ever is.

[LAUGHS]

ALISON: So, who are you?

SID: I told you.
I'’m Sid Simmons.

ALISON: No.

Who are you when you'’re not
being who you appear to be?

Oh, I'’ll tell you what.

I'’ll tell you if you
can say that again.

That.[LAUGHS] That'’s funny.

Thank you, Sid Simmons,
for making me have
a good time tonight.

Well the pleasure is
all mine, Alison Shaeffer,

daughter of Gloria Shaeffer.

You know her?

Oh. Probably not.

One I know, works
for a chemical company.

Ah. Definitely not.

Mine thinks Formula 409
is a retirement plan.

[CHUCKLES]

[CHUCKLES] Here. Let me.

Key?

Thank you.

Here you go.

Well, I g... I guess I just
can'’t hold my Grappuccinos
like I used to.

[SID LAUGHS] Here,
let me help you.

Come on. Oh!
whoa, whoa!
Up, up, up.

Here we are.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

Well, well, well.

I thought women
only lied about their age.

[CHUCKLES]

[MOTORBOAT CHUGGING]

[SPEAKING SPANISH]

MAN: Throw me the line.

[SPEAKING SPANISH]

[GUNSHOT]

MAN: Senor Vasquez
does not like mistakes.

[SPEAKING SPANISH]

[SPEAKING SPANISH]

[GASPS]

Alison. We need to talk.

[MUFFLED SPEAKING]

What are you doing here?
You scared me to death.

And I really don'’t think
you should be in my room,

on so many levels.

Your mother
has been kidnapped.

Huh?

Ah!

Sorry, I...

Alison, listen to me,
all right?

Focus. I have to
tell you something.

Your mother
is an agent
with the CIA.

My mother can'’t
program her VCR.

Look,

your mother and I were
sent down here

on an emergency assignment.

But somehow our cover
got blown and now
they'’ve kidnapped her.

Look, no offense or
anything, Rabbi, but

I think you'’ve had
a little bit too much
of the old Concord grape.

Alison, this is
very, very serious.

Listen, there'’s no way
you'’re ever gonna convince me
my mother is a...

a spy with the CIA.

I see you'’re trying
to merge out
of the expressway.

My mother is a widow
from Long Island
who loves to travel. Period.

Are you wet?

Think of all the major
events in your life,

and why your mother
wasn'’t there.

Uh, college graduation.

Aunt Lily had
her hip replaced.
I think.

The student uprising
in Tiananmen Square.

My twenty first birthday.

Uncle Jerry'’s aneurysm.

The Berlin Wall
came down.

What about
California last year?

There was nothing
going on there.

It was Chelsea'’s
first mixer.

She tried to get
out of there
but Hillary insisted.

I was paired up with
your mother ten years ago

after your father
passed away.

They were
quite a team.

My father was
an agent too?

Legendary.

My fa...

They said they met
through an agency.

I always thought they meant
a dating agency.

So, now...

you both work
for the CIA

and are also dating?

No. She just told you that
and gave me that kiss

so you wouldn'’t
get suspicious.

That'’s very considerate.
Where is she?

I told you. She has
been kidnapped.

I see. And does
this happen often?Never.

Ever?Never.

Were you with
anyone else
last night?

I...

Did you talk to anyone?

I talked to a lot of people.
I won the limbo contest.

Was anyone
in your room?

Sid walked me to my room.Who'’s Sid?

Just some nice old guy.

He knows Gloria Shaeffer,
but it'’s not the same one.

His works for some
chemical company.

That'’s it.What'’s it?

That'’s how
they found out
who Gloria is.

Through me?
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.

What? Ah!Forget it. Forget it.
All right?

Look, I need you to
stay put for now.

I can'’t get you off
the island just yet.
Are you listening to me?

Look, I'’m hungover
and in shock,
but I'’m not deaf.

Do not talk to anyone.Shh!

Do not talk to anyone.
Do not go anywhere.
Do you understand?

But--No buts.

This is a very precarious
situation we'’re in here.

Gloria and I were sent
down here alone,
with no backup,

so for the time being,
I'’m flying solo.

Well, then I'’m
going with you.

Out of the question.
It'’s way too dangerous.

More dangerous
than me sitting here
alone and unprotected,

not knowing who'’s who
and what'’s what?

Yeah. Way more.

Well, you need me
out there.

If for nothing else,
I'’m an extra pair of hands,

an extra pair of eyes,
an extra pair of--

Yeah. I get the idea,
all right? Maybe.

There'’s a man in my room
with no shirt on.

Well. Until reinforcements,
at least to keep
an eye on you.

No. What am I
talking about?

Your mother would
kill me. No. Forget it.

Oh, come on. Come on!
If the situation was reversed,

and you were in my shoes,
and the shoes were
on the other foot,

I'’d let you help me.

What did you
just do there?

Changed the focus
from content to context.

Winning through confusion.

Worked, didn'’t it?

RABBI: Gloria'’s on an island
that'’s half mile off shore,

owned by a guy named
Gustavo Vasquez.

Now--Who'’s that?

I'’ll tell you later,
all right?

Now, I'’ve located a boat
that can get us out there.

And if push comes to shove,
you may have to cover me.

Okay. Wait.

What do you mean
by "cover"?

In case someone
starts shooting.

A gun?

No. The breeze.
Of course, a gun!

Well, I see you'’re
one of those reformed
sarcastic Rabbis.

Doesn'’t your wife mind
you traipsing all over
the world with my mother?

I'’m not married.

All Rabbis are married.

Well, not the ones who
also work for the CIA.

It'’s in the Torah.

[PIANO MUSIC PLAYING]

Good morning,
Mrs. Shaeffer.

Sorry to have
kept you waiting.

I hope you'’ve been
made very comfortable.Oh, very.

Yes, this is...
this is quite a place
you have here.

Um...

dare I ask who
did the decorating?

Me. I did it all myself.

I had a feeling.

I found that I had
quite a knack.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Oh. As we discussed,

the Bank De Germaine
will wire the balance

just as soon as
the product has
been verified.

Their letter.

Slight problem.

Oh?Yes.

I'’m afraid I don't do
business with the CIA.

I don'’t blame you. I hear
they take forever to pay.

You may stop this
little charade.

I know exactly
who you are,

Gloria Shaeffer.

And I know exactly who
you are, Senor Vasquez.

You'’re a businessman,

who'’s gonna sell to
the highest bidder. I can
assure you that'’s me.

Again, problem.

I don'’t trust you.

Oh. Trust is
so overrated.

I have the money.

You have the anthrax.
Are we going to make
a deal or not?

Decisions.

Decisions.

I sell to you,

you put me in prison.

I kill you,

it is open season on me.

What to do?
What to do?

Perhaps I will invite
your daughter to come
and join us here?

Oh.

And why would you do that?Call it insurance.

Besides, I'’d really like
to get to know her.

She has the cutest
little... dimples.

You go near
my daughter,

and I will try you
some dimples.

Gustavo Vasquez owns
several resorts all over
the Mediterranean,

through which he launders
millions of dollars a year.

Only kind of laundry
a man will do.

His main business
is brokering deals.

Drugs, arms, secrets, art,
it doesn'’t matter.

Oh, a Renaissance man.

Do you wanna
hear this or not?

Our main contact up until
last night was Arturo.

So what happened to him?

He was terminated.

Ah, Dinora. The place
where all troubles disappear.

What?

It'’s just an island phrase
I picked up from old Sid.

So why did you
and my mother
come down here?

We came down to
get the statue of
the Little Prince.

Now it'’s this--Polynesian love god.

Tribal art from Jungle,
the coffee table.

This is why my mother
was kidnapped?

I'’m not buying that.

Yeah, well. It was
on loan to the US
when it was stolen.

There has to be something
more to it than that. It can'’t
just be the statue.

A gold bullion,
microchip, something.

I know you can'’t tell me,
but don'’t you insult me
by lying.

Fine! We came down here
to get the Little Prince
and that'’s all I can tell you.

See, isn'’t this so much
better than lying?

A girl always knows
when a guy is lying to her.
It'’s an instinctual thing.

Unless she doesn'’t
wanna know.

Take this car behind us
for example.

It'’s been following us
ever since the hotel.

I knew. But I didn'’t
wanna know.

I have been keeping
an eye on him.

It could be nothing as long
as he keeps his distance.

[CAR REVVING]

ALISON: And if he doesn'’t?RABBI: Don'’t worry.

[CRASH]

Now what?

Okay. Now you can worry.

[HORN TOOTING]

Hang on!

[CAR REVVING]

Let'’s get out of here.

Come on! Come on!

[BRAKES SQUEALING]

[GUN FIRING]

Alison. Come on!

Alison!

This was definitely
not in the brochure!

RABBI: Get out of here.
I'’ll cover you.

They have semi automatics
and you have
a Lady Remington .22?

Guns And The Men
Who Love Them.

[GRUNTS]

Come on! Come on!

I knew this
was a bad idea.

It'’s way too dangerous
with you being in the middle.

Now I gotta figure out
a way to get you
out of here, Alison.

Alison!

What are you...

[GRUNTING]

[HORSE NEIGHING]

[YELPS]

Uh, no, no, no. You go!

Come on. Get on!

RABBI: Go, get outta of here.

What is your problem?

I'’ve never ridden!

That'’s okay.
I'’m driving.

[GRUNTS]

[HORSE NEIGHING]

That was not fun.

Those were real bullets.

They were
trying to kill us.

Hey, don'’t use that.
Use the same one from
the yellow flower over there.

This is good. It'’s aloe.

Resins in the yellow will
clot the blood. Then
you can use the aloe.

How do you know? Exotic Flowers of
the Third World.

[SIGHS]

What, you read
every book ever printed?

Ah, I wish. I'’m just
a book editor.

I'’m telling you that was scary
and I'’ve gone head to head
with George Trumbell.

Who?

Better Dead Than Sorry,
Look But Don'’t Touch,

Death Succumbs Her.
Does anyone in the CIA read?

Hey, will you calm down?

Calm down? This is calm.

This is calm for someone
who'’s just been run
off the road and shot at.

Hey. Uh, you... you did
great with the horse.

Yeah. After I almost
got you killed.

You were right. I'’d be
better just locked up in
my hotel room or something.

What was I thinking?

I'’ll tell you what.
Let'’s head back
to the hotel.

We can figure out
everything there.

Really?Yeah. Come on.

All right. You got
some dirt here.

Oh.

To think only yesterday
my biggest problem was
my boyfriend was missing.

Well, he'’ll show up.
He always does.

Does everyone in the CIA
know my personal life?

Honestly, since
the fall of Communism,

there'’s not a whole
lot else to talk about.

Eric says it'’s all related
to my mother, Mata Hari.

Well, relationships
are complicated.

They sure are.

Sometimes I feel like
I'’m going to
the hardware store for milk.

Well, I think, secretary,
it'’s done for the day.

We better start walking
before they find us.

Hey, where
are you going?

This was is shorter.

How do you know? You'’ve
never been here before.

There'’s a map in
the hotel room.

We can'’t afford
to get lost.

Let'’s just go back
the way we came.

All right.

That was
the way we came?

We'’re on the road,
aren'’t we?

Now I know why it took
you people 40 years to
get out of the desert.

We just can'’t waste any
more time if we wanna
get to Vasquez'’s island.

We'’ve already taken forever.
We'’ve just gone over...

What do you mean,
get to Vasquez'’s island?

I... you said we'’re
gonna head back to
the hotel to regroup.

Yeah. To get another car,
to get to the boat to get
to the island.

No, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no.

I thought you meant
you were gonna drop me off
and then you were--

Wait a minute.
Don'’t you get it? The
hotel'’s not safe anymore.

Look. My partner,
your mother, is gonna
get her head blown off

if we don'’t help her.

I almost got you killed.
That'’s not gonna
help my mother.

We'’ve been all
over that.

I cannot leave you
unprotected,
especially now.

Look, let'’s recap, okay?

I'’m a book editor,
remember?

Give me your book of rules
and regulations. I'’ll make it
into a best-seller.

But I do not
dodge bullets!

Alison, this is
not negotiable.

I'’ll sit by the phone,
I'’ll decode messages,
I'’ll read maps,

but you can'’t depend on me.
I'’m not my mother!

You can say that again!Hey, listen, pal.

You do this
superhero stuff
for a living.

You choose everyday to
put your life in danger.

I read!

On top of that, I have
just discovered in
the last two hours

that everything
I thought I knew, is
a big, fat, giant lie.

The one thing I do know,
bullets are bad.

Me in the path of
a bullet, very bad.

Me getting you killed
and leaving my mother
no chance of escape,

is very, very bad!

So if you wanna
keep trying to pull--Alison. Alison!

What?

Okay. I'’m sorry.

Is this another trick?

No. You'’re right.
I apologize.

Just like that?

I... I don'’t know what
I was thinking. I--

I guess seeing
you in action,

I mean, sure,
you stumbled.
We all do.

Yeah, you wrecked the car.

Yeah. I did.

But, when you appeared
on the horse,

I guess you just
reminded me of
your mother so much,

that I forgot that you
were not a professional.

You did?

Uh-huh. So,
you'’re right.

And I'’m gonna rely on you
to get yourself back
to the hotel while I go and...

try and find your mother.

You should never use
reverse psychology on me.

I edited the book.

Oh, that'’s good to know.

Wait. I don'’t
understand one thing.

They'’ve got the statue,
they'’ve got my mother,

what do they want with us?

Not us. You.

Me? What can I give '’em?

Insurance.

For what?

The agency has
a policy about civilians.

It'’s called
"wait and see."

Vasquez is trying to
buy himself some more
"wait and see" time

until he can line up
a new buyer.

Really? So...

so, if Vasquez had me,
he'’d feel safe enough
not to hurt my mother?

Let'’s think this through.

They either eventually
capture both of us
and we'’re screwed,

or I let them capture me
allowing you to get help
and rescue us.

No way! It'’s
too dangerous.

Oh, well then. Maybe
you better start running.

Alison, what
are you doing?

Counting on you!

Alison!

[GUNSHOTS FIRING]

[TIRES SQUEALING]

[GROANS]

You are just
like your mother.

[MOTORBOAT STARTING]

[SPEAKING SPANISH]

ALISON: Thank you.

I hate to think all those
hours on the StairMaster were
a complete waste of time.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Hey. Hi.Good afternoon, sir.

You have a message.Oh, great.

Oh, all right. Uh, listen, uh,
I need another rental car.

Compact? Mid-sized?

Anything is better than
that golf cart you had me in.

Solow here.RABBI: It'’s morning.
Where are you? What happened?

I was stranded in Morocco
by a sandstorm.
What'’s going on there?

Vasquez has Gloria
and Alison.

What? Alison?
How the hell did--

Look, I'’ll tell you about it
later, all right? When
can you get here?

SOLOW: It'’s hard to say.

Wait a minute. Didn'’t
Herb Kulcheck
retire over there?

Uh, who is he?

He'’s a former agent.
He went independent.

He still dabbles a bit,
but he really
owns the restaurant.

All right. Listen,
I'’ll check it out.

Oh, and one other thing.

A Pakistani businessman
left here on a flight
just before the sandstorm.

A new buyer for Vasquez?

Yeah, that'’s
what we think.

Look, I'’ll be in touch.

[TIRES SCREECHING]

[FOLK MUSIC PLAYING]

[EXHALES]

Miss Shaeffer?

It is a pleasure
to meet you.

Where'’s my mother?
I wanna see her.

Don'’t worry.
Your mother is fine.

I am Gustavo Vasquez.

You are very,
very beautiful.

[SPEAKING SPANISH]

[SPEAKING SPANISH]

As I was telling Wren
and Stimpy here, it'’s all
due to my StairMaster.

I don'’t suppose you have
a gym on the island?

[SPEAKING FRENCH]

[SPEAKING FRENCH]

[SPEAKING GERMAN]

[SPEAKING GERMAN]

That would be all.

You...

are as amusing...

as you are beautiful.

Only to those
who don'’t know me.Oh?

What do those who
really know you feel?

Impotent?

Listen...

I'’m not gonna lie to you.
I'’m attracted to you,
I'’m very attracted to you.

You'’re just my type.
But I'’m learning my type
is bad news for me.

I end up giving you everything
I'’ve got and it's never enough,
it'’s never gonna be enough,

'’cause you're incapable
of accepting love, real love,
into your life.

So, I'’m here to work out
some stuff with my mother

so I can stop
falling for tall,

dark, handsome,
self-obsessed men
such as yourself.

So where is she?

Mom?

Alison?

Are you all right?
I was so worried.

[GASPS]

Is... is that all
you wore?

You tell me that you
and the Rabbi are dating

to cover up
for the fact that
you work for the CIA,

and you'’ve been
lying to me
my entire life,

and you ask me if
this is all I'’m wearing?

Can you keep
your voice down?

No, I will not keep
my voice down!

What are you afraid
it'’ll disturb our captors?

Why didn'’t you just
go off with Grandma,
the way I asked you to?

You cannot keep
palming me off
on Grandma!

I did no such thing!

Are you hungry?

No, you know, it'’s funny.
I kind of lost my appetite

when I found out
my entire
childhood was a lie!

Alison, we cannot
discuss this now.

You can blame
everything on me later.

Right now,
we'’ve got
to get out of here.

Now, where is the Rabbi?

I... I assume,
trying to find his way
on to the island.

You mean
you'’re here alone?

I'’m gonna kill him.

[SIGHS]

Well, were you never
gonna tell me the truth?

Do you think
it was easy
to lie to you?

Yeah. Wasn'’t it?
No!

It was the most difficult
thing I'’ve ever done in
my life. You just wait.

What, wait till when?
Till when? Till I have
children of my own?

Like that'’ll
ever happen.

What do you mean?

Is there
something wrong?

No, no. No!
Not like that.

What I mean is,
don'’t expect me
to have a normal life.

I was not
raised normal.

Oh, I'’m so sorry
you had such a tough life.

So sorry the only camp
you ever went to
was Camp David.

No, I am not saying
there weren'’t good times.

What I'’m saying is that
when you and Daddy
kept disappearing--

Yeah, but we
always came back.

Yet I was always trying
to make sense out of things
that didn'’t make sense!

If you would just--You'’ve said enough!

We'’ll talk
about this later.

Right now, I have
to concentrate

on a way to get us
off of this island alive.

And is it company policy
that all the agents have to
clean before they escape?

I'’m checking for bugs.

I can'’t believe you went
to Chelsea'’s first mixer.

I tried to get
out of it.

I know. Hillary insisted.

MAN: Senor Vasquez thought
that this would be more
comfortable for you.

Yes, will you just
tell Senor Vasquez

that my daughter
has absolutely
no information at all.

Oh, why don'’t you tell
Senor Vasquez that I'’d
be happy to tell him more?

Mm. Native Apparel.

Don'’t you dare.

You just tell
Senor Vasquez that

if he really wants
to make it comfortable
for my daughter,

that he could just let her go,
instead of trying to
dress her up like some...

some...some...some...

Mediterranean Barbie.

ALISON: Oh,
I think it'’s gonna fit.

Imagine that.

What do you mean it fits?
Alison, you get out here now!

MAN: Stop it.

Stop it already.

It'’s bad enough
I have to listen to this
kind of stuff at home.

Why does everything
have to be an argument?

[DOOR CLOSES]

Voila.

What do you think
you'’re doing?

Take it off.

What'’s the big deal?

I said take it off.

Alison Rebbecca,
I'’ve had it with you.

You either take that
dress off right now

or I'’ll take it
off for you.

Oh, God,
you'’re impossible.

You are so impossible.

After the kidnapping,
I vowed I would never
involve you in my--

What kidnapping?

Uh...

Alison, can this wait?

No. What kidnapping?

[SIGHS]

You were almost four.
We were in Israel.

Your father and I were
traveling as a young couple
with a small child.

We were also carrying some
highly sensitive documents.

I can'’t believe
how naive we were,

but there was
no other way.

It was right after
the Six-Day War.

The United States
had promised.

So, who got kidnapped?

You.

What?

Three days
and three long nights.

I was insane.

So that'’s why.

If it feels to you sometimes
like I'’m pushing you away,

I am.

But not because
I don'’t love you,
not because I don'’t care,

but because
I am so afraid
for your life.

And what happened?

We found you--

We didn'’t, our contact,
Achmed, found you.

ALISON: Achmed?

[DOOR OPENING]

ALISON: Achmed.

Achmed was rescuing me.

I'’ve been having
Achmed dreams
for 25 years.

Why didn'’t you
tell me?

[GLORIA SCREAMING][SCREAMS]

[SPEAKING SPANISH]

Mom!

What?That was amazing!

We need some more rope.

How come you never
let me take karate lessons?

GLORIA: Look at this.

We were being guarded
by a man who doesn'’t
even have a gun.

Now that'’s disgraceful.

MAN: I have the gun.

Move away from him.

Hands in the air.

Give me the key
to the room and
take off your belt.

Hands in the air!

Give me your belt.

Hands in the air!

Alison, he can'’t do both.

Oh, yeah. Right.

Never had such
a big gun before.

Give me your belt.

Make a loop.

Quickly. Make a loop.

Put it around
your wrists.

Attaboy. Now follow me.

Check the door.

Check the door.

[GRUNTS]

How'’s it look?ALISON: Clear.

Bye, bye, Pancho.

[GROANS]

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

[WHISPERS] Come on.

That was fun.

It is not a game.I know that.

Yeah, just
make sure you do.

This way.

[GENTLE INSTRUMENTAL
MUSIC PLAYING]

RABBI: Excuse me.

I'’m looking for
Herb Kulcheck.

You found him.

I can'’t believe
all these years you let me
think you didn'’t care,

rather than trust me
with the truth.

I still wouldn'’t have
been there. Now you
wait here. Right here.

Don'’t move.

[BIRDS CHIRPING]

What are you doing?

If you weren'’t
rejecting me,

I would'’ve known the reasons
for your leaving had
nothing to do with me.

Alison, you can'’t take
everything so personally.

Sometimes you don'’t get
to know the why of things.

[SCOFFS]All right, see that boat
down there?

We should go down,
get in that boat,
and get off this island.

ALISON: I don'’t think
that'’s a good idea.

Don'’t start with me--Look, the wind is coming
from the west.

They'’ll hear the motor.

We have a much
better chance if we
paddle out on that sailboat.

The wind is strong enough to
take us out to the mainland.

Where on earth did you
learn all those things?

Grandma.Grand...

All right. All right.
Just...just do what
you think is best.

Baby, be careful.

Be careful.

What are you
talking about?
You'’re going too?

No, I can'’t. I gotta
go back and get the statue.

This one has a vial
of anthrax enough to
eliminate half of Europe.

So that'’s what
he couldn'’t tell me.

Then I'’m definitely
not leaving you here.Yes, you are.

No, I'’m not.

Please don'’t argue with me
and do as I tell you.

Stop being a mom.When you get
off this island.

I can do this if you would
just get out of here.[MOTORBOAT APPROACHING]

Shh. Get down.

[WHISPERING]
I wonder who that is.

ALISON: Wait. Wait.
I'’ve got something.

[ALISON LIP-READING]
Ah, Mr. Dinte, welcome.
How was your trip?

Fine. Fine.
Is everything six?

If you have the money.

GLORIA: When did you
learn to read lips?

When they invented
the Walkman.

Dinte must be
Vasquez'’s buyer.

[GUN COCKING]

Hey, where are you
taking her?

Mom!

HERB: Now you
gotta taste this.

I'’m waiting for
a shipment of guns,

I run into this guy
who'’s a chef.

Come on, sit down.
Relax.

So.

What can I do for you?

I need to get on
to Vasquez'’s island.

He'’s got one
of our agents
and a civilian.

I could.

Come on, eat.
It'’s unbelievable.

Yum. Good.

So, can you do this?

Of course, I can.

How much?How much you got?

[LAUGHS] Hey, I'’m kidding.

Tell Marty I'’ll put it
on his tab, all right?

Well, I got a map
back at my office.

Eat. Be right back.

[DOOR OPENS]

You look lovely.

You picked it out.

I do have a good eye.

But you have added
a delightful flair.

Would you like a drink?

No, thank you.

Do you mind?I understand.

Understand?Needing a drink.

Sometimes I make
men nervous.

Really?

And why do you
think that is?

I don'’t know.

[EXHALES DEEPLY]

I was hoping
you could tell me.

Oh. And I was hoping
for something more.

I... only wanted to
freshen up. Do you
need to search?

You'’re getting
very hard...
to resist.

Go.

Leave the door unlocked.

[EXHALES]

[GROANS]

[YELPS]

You'’ll be just
fine, buddy...

but I'’d definitely consider
another profession.

Okay.

Now, the best place to
get on the island is here.

Extremely shallow
and rocky.

Low tide, the guards
take their break.

How can you be so sure?

'’Cause they all come over at
my place for my avocado soup.

It'’s my specialty.

Hey, Jose, bring him
a bowl of soup, would you?

No, thank you.
So when'’s low tide?

In about two hours.

Now you sit,
have a little soup,
a little salad,

then we go and
rescue your people.

Dinora. The place where
all your troubles disappear.

[LAUGHS]

I heard that
about Dinora.

Cheers.

Cheers.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

Who is it?

VASQUEZ: Very funny.

I thought you said
you did not want a drink.

Don'’t you know
the difference

between when a woman
says "No" and means no,

and when a woman
says "Yes" and means yes?

No.

[LAUGHS] So...

where'’s the statue everyone
wants to get their hands on?

VASQUEZ: Not everyone.

Some of us would like
to get our hands on...
other things.

It'’s over there.

It really
contains anthrax?

I don'’t want
to talk business.

To tonight.

May it be full
of surprises.

Mmm.

So, what would you like
to talk about, then?

Yes. Tell me, why do you
think I'’m such a bad boy?

Gee, I don'’t know.
Could it be your
amoral lifestyle

and your
commitment to crime?

That? That is nothing.

I just do it
for the money
and the power.

But is it worth it?

The hours seem
kind of long.

That is true,

but the commute
isn'’t so bad.

[CHUCKLING]

VASQUEZ: I like you.

And despite
all my therapy,
I like you too.

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

[SPEAKING SPANISH]

[MAN SPEAKING SPANISH]

[GROANS]

Excuse me, hmm?

[INDISTINCT CONVERSATION]

What was that
all about?

I, uh, I wanted to
get your attention.

But now you'’ve got it.

[LAUGHS]

What'’s so amusing?

Well, it seems that
your people went and
hired a sub-contractor.

First of all, they are
not my people.
And second of all,

what'’s a sub-contractor?A mercenary.

Oh. [CHUCKLES]

And do you know
what the funniest part is?What?

They hired Herb.

And Herb, when
he'’s not cooking,

he works for me. [CHUCKLES]

Oh, the world is
a crazy place, eh?

Salud.

Mm.

Well, we'’re all set.
All we have to do is
pick up some wet-suits.

Why don'’t you send them
for the wet suits?

We can meet them
at the dock.

Good idea.

[SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

Is this you?I was ten.

I just knocked over
my first papaya stand.

Oh.

You'’ve come
a long way.

We are both very much
alike, you and I.

We both like to
break the rules,

each one in our own way,
in our own worlds.

But we break them.

[LAUGHS NERVOUSLY]

[MEN SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

[ALISON AND VASQUEZ CHUCKLING]

Are you all right?

I'’m better
than all right.

Don'’t you think I should
be the judge of that?

Oh.

Foam'’s the best part.

[CHUCKLES]

[MUFFLED YELLING]

[TIRES SCREECHING]

You have
amazing eyes, huh.

They have, uh, little
tiny brown specks in them.
Can you see?

Ooh!Oh!

You'’re falling for me.Oh, I don'’t know
what'’s wrong with me.

I think the blood might be
rushing from your head
to, uh, other places?

Oh, yes. That'’s right.

[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]

What are you doing
all the way over there?

Normally I play
hard to get, but...
I can'’t wait.

[VASQUEZ CHUCKLES]

I cannot blame you.

[MUSIC FIZZLES OUT]

Sweet dreams,
papaya boy.

Don'’t tell me
Grandma taught you
all that.

Mom? You saw?

Saw? I took notes.
You were great, girl.

Help me. [GRUNTS]Okay.

[GRUNTS]

Here. Cover yourself up.

I need some rope.

Aah...

What'’d you
knock him out with?

This flower which has
sedative properties.

It'’s immediate
but short term.

Okay. We gotta
move fast then.

Come on, let'’s go.Wait a sec.

Wait a sec.Let'’s go.

We'’re gonna
need this.

What?

I don'’t know, but it's
important enough
for him to lock up.

All right.
Let'’s move.

The statue!

Let'’s go.

There you go.

Excuse me,
can we leave now?

Oh...

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

[GROANS]

Senor Vasquez?

[SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

No, you idiots.

La estatua.

Where'’s the statue?

[SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

[GROANS]

Senor Dinte...

[ADVENTUROUS MUSIC PLAYING]

[GUNSHOT]

[GROANS]

Mom!

Mom, are you all right?[GROANS]

Yeah, I'’m all right.
Get going.

ALISON: Are you crazy?
You'’re bleeding.

You gotta get off this island.I am not leaving you!

You have got
to do this.
Now, go!

I'’ll stall them
while you get off. Go!

Go!

[GUNSHOT]

[GUNSHOTS FIRING]

[GUNSHOTS FIRING]

[SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

Come on!

The girl!

[GUNSHOTS FIRING]

MAN:Stop shooting,
you might hit the statue!

[MOTOR STALLS]

Oh, come on, George
"100,000,000 books sold"
Trumbell.

[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]

[SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

[MOTOR STARTING]

Yes! James Bond,
eat your heart out.

[PHONE RINGING]

Yeah.

It'’s me.
Alison'’s on her way.

Meet her at the pier.
She'’s got the statue.

What about you?

Don'’t worry about me.
Get Alison.

I'’m on my way.

Which pier?

[MOTORBOATS ZOOMING]

Gotcha!

Alison Shaeffer.

Daughter of Gloria Shaeffer,
who is now dating the Rabbi.

Alonzo.

Boy, what
great service.

[GRUNTS] Careful.

Oh, careful.

[GUN COCKS]

I don'’t believe this.

I'’ll take the statue.

Ah, damn.

ALONZO: Come on,
hurry it up.

You wanna
give me a hand?

[GRUNTS]

[GUNSHOTS]

RABBI: Alison!

Are you okay?

ALISON: I think so.

My mom...

Did you get my mom?

Yeah, she called.
She'’s fine.

Hey, you did great.

Oh, what, this?
It was nothing.

Well, I'’m very,
very proud of you.

May I?

Yeah.

Thanks.

[APPROACHING FOOTSTEPS]MAN: Alison!

Alison, are you all right?

Uncle Marty,
what are you doing here?

It'’s about time, Marty.
Where'’s Gloria?

She'’s headed
back to the hotel.

We got Dinte,
and Vasquez
and his men.

Is that it?Yeah.

Not you too.

[SIGHS] I'’m afraid so.

Uncle Marty,
here'’s the disk.

Mom.

GLORIA: Alison!

Oh! Ow.

Are you all right?

I'’m fine.
Are you all right?Yes, it'’s nothing.

PETER: Ali!

Alison!Oh, my God.

It'’s Peter.

That'’s Peter?

Mm. She has the strangest
taste in men, doesn'’t she?

Peter, what are you doing here?

I... was worried
when you didn'’t
return my calls.

You know, suddenly,
all these things
ran through my head.

I didn'’t know how...

well, the way
we left things--

The way we...
the way we left things
was you left.

After you said
those awful things.

I told you I loved you
and wanted to marry you.

Exactly.

Ah, Peter, uh...

let'’s not start something
we should be finishing.

Good.

Wait. What does that mean?

I can'’t do this anymore.

Do what?

This. Us. You and me.

The plural thing.

What are you
talking about?

I came all the way over here
so you can dump me?

Yes.

And, uh, if you hurry,
you can just make
the 3:00 p.m. flight.

Ali, wait!

Does this mean that
you'’re not gonna
read my book?

I said if you hurry.

So, we done here now?

Case closed,
bad guys caught,
world saved?

Not exactly.

[CAR STARTING]

No. No! No,
no, no, no way!

You'’re not doing this.

I can'’t let you do it.

Mom, would you
please calm down?

I am calm. I'’m very calm
for a mother

whose daughter is gonna
let herself be used as bait.

How else are we
gonna get Vasquez?It doesn'’t matter.

And stop saying "we"!

You'’re not "we,"
I'’m "we"!

I was "we".
Yeah, but now you'’re
back to you.

I don'’t wanna go back
to that "me". I like
the me that was "we".

Can'’t you see?Will you cut it out.

Come on, Mom, aren'’t you
the least bit relieved

that everything is
out in the open?No.

Yes. I don'’t know. Maybe.

[SIGHS]

The day you were born,
and believe it or not,
I was there for that.

The day you were born,

the first minute
I saw you,

I knew I would do
everything I could do
to protect you.

And you did.

I didn'’t make
all those sacrifices

for you to throw yourself in
the middle of everything now.

I mean, what is the point?

I hope you did it so
I could grow up and
make my own decisions.

Like tonight.[HUFFS]

[SOFT MUSIC PLAYING]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Would you care
to dance?

I'’d love to.

I can'’t believe
this is happening.
I can'’t watch.

You okay?

I'’m a little nervous.

Is this better?

This is what'’s
making me nervous.

Just kidding!

Kinda.

Alison.

There'’s something
I have to tell you.

Oh, no, now what?

I'’m not really a Rabbi.

Oh.

Not even
a Talmud scholar?

Disappointed?

No.

I'’m just trying to
remember if I told you
anything in confidence

that I wouldn'’t have
told you if I didn'’t
think you'’re a Rabbi.

Like what?

Well...

anything of
an intimate nature.

Intimate?

I don'’t remember.

Thank you.

I don'’t even know
your real name.

Oh. It'’s Gary.

Gary Sutton.

[CHUCKLES]

Think I like
Rabbi better.

Everything'’s in place.

So is there anything else
you wanna tell me?

Kiss me.

Hold that thought.

May I have this dance?

Oh. You! Hi.

Yes, that is a gun.

But I'’m also very
happy to see you.

Really?

Why?

Call it unfinished business.

Funny. That'’s not
how I see it.

Mom and I are safe.
We'’ve got the anthrax.

Dinte and Herb
are in custody.

No. We'’re done.

Tell me, Alison,
do you believe in fate?

Only when I don'’t
get what I want.

I can'’t imagine
that happens
very often.

Well, you'’d be surprised.

I always get
what I want.

And now, I want something
that only you can provide.

How did I know that?

I don'’t know.

After you.

I'’m right behind you.

Can I go to the ladies'’?

No. Keep moving.

Before we get to
more personal matters,

I would like
my disk back.

I'’ll bet you would.

It'’s quite an interesting
list of politicians
and government officials

you have on
your payroll.

Just give it back to me.

Please.

How about you drop your gun
and we don'’t kill you?

Would you like
to tango?

I don'’t tango.

[GUNS COCKING]

I don'’t really think
you wanna die.

Just a temporary
setback.

Let'’s go.

Mm-hmm.

Just tell me
one thing.

Are you seeing anyone?

Get him out of here.

Next time,

I will mix
the drinks.

Nice work, you guys!

Are you okay?I'’m fine.

The kiss worked great.
Nice touch.

I'’m gonna have
to remember that.

Gloria, give me a hand with
the locals, will you, please?

See you back
in the room.

The kiss
was a signal?

Yeah. Of course.

What... you didn'’t think
that was real, did you?

Oh, my God. You did.

I am so sorry.
I--I thought

for sure you knew
that wasn'’t a real kiss.

But how was I
supposed to know that?

Because this
is a real kiss.

See the difference?

Uh-huh.

Yeah. Okay.

Thanks.

[SERENE MUSIC PLAYING]

[CRICKETS CHIRPING]

[DOOR OPENING]

GLORIA: Ali?

Ali.

ALISON: Out here.

You okay?

Yeah. Tonight was
terrifying. Exhilarating!

[SIGHS]

I know.

I can'’t imagine
ever doing anything
like that again. But...

how can I not?

I'’m very proud of you.

You are?Yeah.

Turn around.

I believe
this is yours.

You sure?

Absolutely. Positively.

And if I did say so
myself, you'’re a chip
off the old block.

Thanks, Mom.

And I get it. It does
run in the family.

Come on. Let'’s
raid the mini bar.

Wait. What do you mean,
"runs in the family"?

[BIRDS CHIRPING]

Grandma.

Hi, darling!

Why didn'’t you tell me?

What?

That I worked
for the CIA and...

that Churchill and I
were like this?

You never
told me that!

Hah!

GARY: Alison. You ready?

Oh. Gotta go.

Bye, darling.

Bye, darling.

[CAR STARTS]

Does she know
he'’s not a real Rabbi?

She'’s your granddaughter.
She knows everything.

[LAUGHS]

ALISON:
So I'’m starting a new
chapter in my life

with a new man,

a well-earned necklace,

and the blessings of
both my mother
and my grandmother.

It'’s funny how my entire world
has been turned upside down

yet, now it all makes sense.

Maybe there'’s a book in it.

I'’ll have to let you know.

[TANGO MUSIC PLAYING]