My Jealous Barber (2004) - full transcript

You are
my father's last customer, Isaksen.

As usual, I'll give you
the same appointment next month.

It sounds like
you're coming down with something.

Short over the ears, as usual?

I need you to straighten up,
Isaksen.

Isaksen?

MY JEALOUS BARBER

BENT, 10 A.M.
10TH ANNIVERSARY

Your anniversary is coming up.

What kind of anniversary?

Next month I'll have
cut your hair for ten years.



My customers are few, but loyal.
And if I may say so...

You belong to me, in a sense.

I inherited my other customers
from my father.

And he from his father.

Lamb?

Chicken.

You should close your window.
It's supposed to rain.

Did you carry that pot
all the way here?

-I took the bus, dad.
-You sat on the bus with that?

I always do.

Why didn't you ever get
your driver's license?

-Because I didn't want to.
-You didn't dare!

You've always been a little wimp.

There's no getting around that.



Do you still go to the same barber?

-Yes. Frank.
-Good for you.

But it wouldn't hurt
to go more often.

Look at me!
Look what I look like.

Some schoolkid
from the Home Help cuts my hair.

-You might...
-What? What are you trying to say?

-Maybe you smoke too much.
-Don't you start!

Just because you work at a hospital.

You can brew some coffee.
I don't want any.

What is it?
Is something wrong?

No, it's just that...

I have had
this sharp sting in my chest.

-Sting?
-Don't interrupt me!

Yes. A sting. Like someone's
stabbing me with a needle in my...

Heart.

-Yes.
-Probably regular wear and tear.

The heart muscle
is vulnerable to wear.

Imagine, your whole life, day
and night, never a moment's rest...

You should see a doctor.

I'm much better now.

Good morning, Bent.

Hello.

-Beautiful weather. Indian summer.
-If you say so.

But tomorrow
they've forecast rain again.

Thank you, Bent.

Phone call for you.

Really?

Last night?

Was it his heart?

Thank you.

-Nice of you to come, Bent.
-Of course I came. Thank you.

-Death is not always a bad thing.
-He was old.

-And a man of honor.
-Yes, a man of honor.

And he died in his chair.

-How do you know that?
-I was there. He died in my hands.

-Were you there when he died?
-Of course.

You were there when my father died?

-I'm talking about Isaksen.
-Isaksen?

Isaksen...

His funeral was in the big chapel.
Optimistic.

-Is your father also dead?
-The little chapel.

-What did he die of?
-He fell down the stairs.

He was on his way out
to buy cigarettes.

I think.

Let's walk home together, Bent.

A father should die before his son.

Thank you!

Maybe you could
carry it inside for me?

Thank you.

Just put it down there.

It needs water.

There!

My name is Susie.
Susie Marie Eliassen.

Bent Samuelsen.

It needs light during the day,
dark at night.

Light during the day,
dark at night.

I'm having
a housewarming party tomorrow.

Would you like to come,
as thanks for your help?

-Tomorrow?
-I'm afraid he can't.

His father just died.

My condolences.

Taco, come here!

Taco!

-It isn't easy.
-That plant won't survive.

No.
And she'll be gone in two weeks.

-Aren't you cold, Bent?
-Not at all.

It's the season for colds.
Come over for dinner tomorrow.

We can mourn together.
You are mourning, aren't you?

You're usually home around 7
on Fridays. How about 8 o'clock?

OK...

Bye.

-Kaspersen's barbershop.
-This is Bent.

Bent Samuelsen.
One of your customers.

Of course I remember you, Bent.

-About that dinner...
-8 o'clock sharp!

The menu is already set.

I'm sorry.

I can't make it.

-Has something happened?
-No.

You aren't going to
that housewarming, are you?

Why in the world would I do that?

You'd never party
the day after your father's funeral.

-Are you there, Bent?
-Of course.

-So you'll be here?
-Yes.

I look forward to it.

Bye.

Champagne?
Check.

Where did I park?

Where the hell is my parking list?

It's not there!

There it is!

19 Fagertun Street.

This is how my place looks.

It was nice of you
to accept my invitation.

There's a first time for everything.
Have a seat.

Imagine, ten years
since I first cut your hair!

-I remember it like yesterday.
-It wasn't...

-It wasn't yesterday.
-No.

Much has happened since then.

-Like what?
-Your hair is thinner.

-Your glass is empty!
-I just gulped it down.

You're basically
my only regular customer.

-It isn't that bad, is it?
-Bad? I think it's good.

My father and grandfather
would be proud of me.

Why should I complain?

Cheers.
To your ancestors.

To all that lasts.

Was your father proud of you, Bent?

Hi. It's Susie, your new neighbor.
I was just wondering...

Incredible.
It was that aroma...preacher...

-Susie?
-Susie, Susie, Susie...

She wanted to borrow some coffee.
Espresso.

That fits perfectly with
everything I've heard about her.

Heard about her?

We should be grateful
we didn't accept that invitation.

I did some research on her.
You can't be too careful these days.

She has moved five times
in the past two years.

-Five times?
-Five times.

I could tell by looking at her.

I see you're fond of boxing, Frank.

Fond of...

You either hate boxing,
or you love boxing.

I had to choose: boxer or barber.

I think you made the right decision.

Come here.

Feel it.

Feel it!

It's yours.

That is Isaksen's.

Coffee?

That palm doesn't go there.

Are you OK?

Come out here.

Stand here.
I have something for you.

Open wide.

Stick your tongue out.

Crowds make me dizzy too.
It's perfectly normal.

And you are...?

Bent.
Bent Samuelsen.

Nice to meet you.
Do you live nearby?

No, now I remember!
You were one of the movers.

Frank?

Hi.
Nice to meet you.

Frank runs the barbershop
across the street. You have met.

Of...course!
Hi.

There are so many new names today.

Her palm was freezing.
I just brought it inside.

Lots of people here.
Thank you.

Would you like one?

So you aren't full?

Are you homos?

By no means.

-Just good friends?
-No. Frank is just my barber.

That wasn't like me.
I apologize.

I think I should leave.

Hi...

I thought I'd drop by
to apologize again.

I don't usually behave like...

Has something happened?

Absolutely not.

I just thought I'd apologize
for my behavior yesterday.

Yesterday?

-Were you here yesterday?
-Yes, I dropped by.

Did you have a good time?

Yes.
It won't happen again.

-It can't have been that bad.
-No, if you don't think so...

I didn't write it down,
so it can't have been important.

Then everything's OK.

Hey...

What was your name again?

Bent Samuelsen.

-Is something wrong?
-No.

DEAR, BENT!
THANKS FOR 10 GOOD YEARS. FRANK.

This is fantastic.
It's just like "Chicago Hope."

I'm an actor. I applied to
drama school, but wasn't accepted.

-So I'm here to make some money.
-You sure you can take this?

-Have you ever seen a corpse?
-No. But I've seen Scarface.

Brian de Palma. Awesome movie.
Lots of corpses.

This is your new partner, Bent.
He didn't get into drama school.

-Christian.
-Bent Samuelsen.

This is good research.
Method acting.

Method acting...

Al Pacino does a lot of that.

Look out for doorsills.

What fun!
Good morning, boys! How are you?

Good morning.

-Have you got a new partner?
-Christian.

Christian...

Welcome to us, Christian.
Bent...

That was that.

What was that?

What was that all about?

Anything to drink?
Cappuccino, caffe latte, espresso?

-Any particular style?
-Whatever.

-You can do whatever you want!
-OK...

Light at night, dark during the day.

Light during the day...

Hello!
Stop him!

He stole my book!
Stop him!

Yes!

My hero!

I'm Susie Marie Eliassen.

I run that aromatherapy salon.
Sorry about this.

It's me. Bent.
Bent Samuelsen.

Thanks for your help.
I owe you a free session.

-Are you drawing the thief?
-Yes.

Sure you don't remember me?
Bent Samuelsen? I'm your neighbor.

That isn't you.

I got a haircut today.
That's probably why.

I like your hairdo.

I mean it.
It looks good on you.

-Should we take our clothes off?
-I'd love to.

-Let me see your back.
-Is it only me you forget?

No.
It isn't only you I forget...

Bent.

-Don't you remember anything?
-Sure.

Everything
until we fell on the dance floor.

We were dancing the tango.

I never forgot a move,
and then bang! There I lay.

Now I hardly remember a single step.

If I don't write it down
in my book, it's gone.

On the bright side, I don't have
any bad memories either.

"Bent lives
across the street from me."

"In number 57."

Bent Samuelsen.

Really?

Yes.
I see.

Nice weather, huh?
Warm.

Bent Samuelsen.

-Bent Samuelsen.
-It's your barber. You can come now.

-Frank?
-I'm open. I'm waiting for you.

Isn't it a little late?

No, you see...

I saw you, Bent.

-I'm tired. I'm going to bed...
-I'm only trying to be nice.

-Would tomorrow be better?
-Aren't you closed on Sundays?

I thought we agreed
that she was unstable.

It's her short-term memory.
She hit her head while tangoing.

Tangoing?
A lame excuse.

You should take care,
now that your father's dead.

Soon we'll be the only ones left.

Frank, I'm sorry. I really
am tired. I apologize, Frank. OK?

Frank?

-Hi.
-Hi.

-I just wanted to thank you.
-For what?

For forgetting to put your shoes on.

That's the nicest compliment
I've ever been paid.

-Coffee?
-Yes, please.

I don't forget everything
that I don't write down.

You don't?

I remember with my stomach.

I get a knot,
something gnaws at me...

Don't worry. By tomorrow
I'll have forgotten everything.

Do you know how many hours
you have spent in my chair?

Aren't you going to invite me in?

So this is how it looks in here.

Nice view.

80 hours,
you have spent in my chair.

Have you really done the math?

80 hours and 45 minutes. That's
almost four days. That's a lot.

I need to ask you something, Bent.

Have you ever been -

- dissatisfied with my work?
-Dissatisfied?

By no means. Why in the world
would I be dissatisfied, Frank?

I'm just asking.

Show me the rest of your apartment.

You know what, Frank?
It's all your fault.

Everything could have been
different without my old haircut.

I hated that haircut, Frank!

I hated it!

-Hi.
-Hi.

This is Frank.
My barber.

I like his haircut.

You're lucky your father is dead.

Hey, remember me?
Good to see you again!

-Get him!
-Ready to dance, grandpa?

What did you say, boy?

I know what he needs.

Want me to call the doctor?

And that's that.

There's something I'd like to say.
Excuse me.

I'm planning to compete in the
National Hairdressing Championships.

It's time to put my shop back
on the map. What do you say to that?

The national champion
cutting your hair!

-I am very tired...
-Yes, you are very tired.

You are very tired.

Aren't you biting off
more than you can chew?

More than I can chew?

Is that what you think?
More than I can chew? I'll show you!

Next Saturday I am competing
in the National Championships!

Of course you are.
Why shouldn't you?

Exactly.
I will compete in the master class.

-You are invited, Susie.
-Thank you.

"Saturday.
The National Championships."

"Ask Frank the barber
about time and location."

Bent will also join us.

-Perhaps Susie can drive us?
-To the Championships!

-Don't I get any?
-I didn't think you wanted any.

Good luck, Frank.

Could you ask Bent...

Bent!

-I have to ask you...
-You remembered my name.

-Yes, I did!
-Bent.

Yes.
Bent.

Now I forget
what I was supposed to say!

-As long as I don't have to go.
-Please. You have to.

I don't even know him.

Please.
For me.

Your turn, Kaspersen.

This way.

What did you have in mind?

An apron,
so I don't leave here with fur.

No problem.

Should we cultivate your existing
hairdo, or try something new?

Let's cultivate.

If it ain't broke, don't fix it.

-Broke?
-"Never change a winning team."

What are those trophies from?

We won
the last two National Championships.

We plan to win our third now.

Are you going to start with
the smallest scissors?

-Yes, that was my plan.
-They are for the sideburns.

I start with the sideburns.

Do you start your meals
with dessert?

I can start with
the larger scissors, if...

Never mind.
I've changed my mind.

How are you feeling?

Frank...

Are you competing against him?

Do you mind?

He's young and hungry.
Like you once were.

Am I shaking?

I can't have my model
working against me. We're a team.

Of course.
Who's your model?

Didn't you tell him?

What's the big deal?
You just have to sit there.

-I refuse to sit there!
-We're here now. Do it for Frank.

That's easy for you to say.
You can forget everything.

Time to go.

I see the spy has returned.

Welcome to the
National Hairdressing Championships!

You have 20 minutes.

Go!

Ten seconds left!

Scissors down!

Kaspersen, Frank?

Your time is up.

Stop the car.

-I didn't mean it like that.
-Stop the car!

Bent, please don't do this.

SENIOR CITIZENS
HALF PRICE

TEMPORARILY CLOSED

Hello. Beautiful weather. But the
forecast calls for rain tomorrow.

-You did that on purpose!
-You're right. I did.

I'm going to...
Let go of me!

You got just what you deserved.
Say that, if anyone asks.

Bent Samuelsen gave
Finn Abrahamsen what he deserved!

I'll see to it that you get fired!

Too late.

I've already quit.

There goes Al Pacino!

CLOSED FOR GOOD

-Can you cut my hair?
-I'm closed.

So am I.
The movers are on their way.

I'll cut your dog's hair.

Can you do me a favor?
Take down those portraits.

-Why?
-Just do it, please.

I envy you. Soon
you will have forgotten Bent and me.

Only the head forgets.
The heart never forgets.

-Is that the movers?
-Yes.

Should I tell Bent anything,
if I see him again?

Hi, Frank!

You can cut my hair,
but only how I tell you.

I would have done that years ago,
if only you had asked.

The customer is always right.
But I am closed now.

-I quit my job.
-Susie has moved.

Then you were right, Frank. Let's
forget her, like she's forgotten us.

That isn't what she said.

She said that
the heart never forgets.

-Get in!
-I don't have a license.

I don't either!

What's the address?

She wouldn't say.

I'm sorry, Bent.

Subtitles: Nick Norris