Mr. Wrong (1984) - full transcript

- Just yourself, is it?
- Oh, yes.

Good choice.
It's got class.

I know what you're thinking. You'd rather
have something like that over there.

Jap crap!
It's British. Built to last.

Um, has it got much rust?

It's a Jag. Only had two owners.
Spent seven years in a garage.

- Preserved! Ow!
- Oh!

As you can see, it's got a tow bar.
Very handy!

Been over it, top to bottom,
everything works.

It's all original condition inside.

Damn keys!



- It's a bit bigger than I wanted.
-This is the economical model.

They say they're petrol guzzlers,
but that's the big ones.

This is a great little runabout.

- I really wanted something reliable
for a long journey.

- Ah, they're great for that, too.

Are you, uh, leaving town?

No, uh, I just arrived.

I just wanted something to
drive home on the weekends.

It's a long way.

Oh. So, is this your first car?

Definitely a lady's car.

Handles like a dream.

Of course it's not new,
but it's a great price.

Uh, do you want to take it for
a test drive, Miss...



- Alexander, Meg.
- Taunton. Call me Clyde.

- Uh, yeah, well I've got time.
- Good, I'll show you the gears.

Bye, Mr. Whitehorn.

See you Monday.

Have a nice weekend at your parents'.

Ta!

- Why don't you watch where you're going?
- Sorry, I just wasn't thinking!

Be careful, Meg, be careful.

Margaret! Goodness it's--
It's very grand.

You sure it's not too much for you?

Was the drive very tiring?

- Nothing I couldn't cope with--
- Shhh. You'll wake your father.

- Margaret, shush.
- Sorry.

He didn't wait up.

He hasn't been sleeping well,
so he went to bed early just in case.

It'd be nice to have you
to talk to now and then.

I talk to your father...

Oh, I'm a bit tired, you know.
Went out to dinner last night.

- Was it nice?
- Yeah, it was okay.

A nice little table for two?

No, Mum, a noisy little table for five.

Don't worry, when I get a boyfriend
you'll be the first to know.

Margaret, I didn't mean to pry.

- It's only that I care about you.
- Oh, Mum, I know you do.

Hey, thanks for lending me
the money for the car.

- Is it what you wanted?
- Yes, it's great, Mum.

Really neat.

I put a hottie in your bed.

I told you.

I was gonna surprise you.

It's a very nice car, Margaret.

The back was a bit dirty, though.

You still look strained, dear.
You can take it easy now.
You're at home.

You know, it's amazing.

When I was your age,
my mother gave me a glory box.

And here you are, tearing 'round
the countryside in this big car.

You're not scared, are you?
I would be.

- All the rush and bustle in the city traffic.
No, I'm not scared of the city traffic.

Oh, Meg, could you open the bonnet for us?

It's, uh, a big six...

...overhead camshaft. It's beautifully
put together. Have a look.

Now look at that.
Can you turn on the motor?

Ah! Ugh!

- Hey, what'd you do that for?
- Sorry, Dad! Hey, look!

- Sorry, I didn't mean to hit the horn!

- It's all right, it's all right!
- Hey, Meg, this is Wayne Wright.

- Look, it was just an accident.
- He came over to look at your car.

Nice machine there.

He used to live next door, you know.

- But, you'd probably be
too young to remember.
- Oh, no!

- And we had a nice cup of tea.
- I remember you from primary school!

You don't want a lift back, do you?

No, I've got my bike.

But I could look you up
in the Big Smoke if you like.

I mean, if that would be all right.

Yeah.

It's in the book. "V. Alexander."
That's Val, my cousin.

I'm flatting with her until
I get settled.

- Where do you flat?
- Oh, I'm still at home.

- Keep thinking about moving out, though.

- Too expensive?
- Too comfortable.

- How long have you been living there?
In the city? Oh, for years.

I only come back here to visit my Gran.

(Together) What do you do?
- What do you do?

I'm at Whitehorn Antiques.

It's a bit boring really.
I just do all the packing.

What about you?

Polytech. Computer programming.

- Good?
- Uh, okay.

- I've got other ideas, though.
- Like?

Beekeeping.
Always wanted to keep bees.

Need capital, though.

Well, I'll see you.

See you.

- Whitehouse Antiques?
- Horn. Whitehorn.

Hey! Hands off.

Could be catching.

- Remember how Fiona Douglas used to
think kissing made you pregnant? -Yeah!

Wrong! It's contact with nappies!

You play with nappies,
you play with fire, girl.

- Oh!
- Oh, Edith, let me give you a hand!

Oh, I can just see you now
coming home sooner.

- People gawping as
you waddle off the train.
- Oh, no, not the train.

- No, I drive home in my Jag!
- Fat chance!

That's what I used to think.
Look what I got:

a Hillman Hunter with a big end going.

- Edie, seriously. I've bought a Jag!
- You have?

Well, you didn't go south just
to blow your nose, did you?

It's just a car, Edie.

It's a Jag.

- Hey, what does your father think?
- Oh, he likes it.

He tells me to keep it 'round the back.

Funny that 'cause my boss
asked me to do the same.

Oh, they can't stand the thought of a
woman having a bigger one than their one.

It's reverse penis envy!

I missed you, Edie.

Everyone in town's different somehow;
more serious or something.

Partly 'cause I don't
know anyone very well.

You meet any decent men?

- No.
- You keep it that way.

Drive 'em off with a
pitchfork if you have to.

Edie, why don't you come
and stay with me?

Come on. Ya gets to come stay
a couple of days. Bring the baby.

- Get a bit of the glamorous life, eh?
- Yeah!

Oh, it's an attractive proposition, but nah,
I can't just drop everything at short notice.

Give us a bit of warning.
We'll come next time.

We can paint the town red.

Well, maybe pink.

Lemon.

I wish he'd mentioned it to me.
We'll never be able to eat all this.

Well, it's his way of
saying he really misses you.

Oh, what a good sized boot.

Big enough to put a body in, ha!

Would you like these?

If you don't like them, just
give them away to somebody else.

Aw, thanks, Mum.

Look after yourself.

Drive carefully.

I'll wear a petti, I'll take a hanky...

I'll always have a clean pair
of undies in case I get run over!

How kind!

The Good Samaritan is
invariably feminine these days.

Thank you.

This is stinkin' weather
even for this town.

Going far?

Oh, just over the hill, thanks.

My car broke down; my
partner and I got stranded.

Missed an appointment,
and lost a deal.

Oh well.

You're a bit unusual.

Not many ladies would stop.

Too scared, I suppose.

It's a bit of a risk, isn't it?

I could be anyone. There's some
pretty funny people out there.

Weirdos.

Oh, don't misunderstand me.

But a good-looking lady like you could
get yourself into powerful trouble.

Truly.

Definitely an attractive woman.

Someone like you picking up hitchhikers, well,
could be misconstrued, eh?

Are you warm enough?

Perfectly, thank you.

I'm one of those fortunate people
who don't feel the cold. Or the heat.

- I'm a temperate man.
- Is your partner all right?

Is something wrong?

She's wet.

Hey!

Where'd she go?

What?

Where'd she gone?

- Your partner, the girl you had a breakdown with.
- Girl? My partner's a man, John--

Whoever it was you were traveling with.

And it was her who I really stopped for.
I didn't even see you.

Well, there isn't a lady with me, okay?

She was tall; she wore a pale raincoat.

And her hair was this dark, reddish color.
Probably 'cause she was wet through.

And she had a green scarf about her neck.

And, when she put her hand out to open
the door, I saw her throat.

She had this large, purple birthmark
at the base of her neck.

Look, I'm sorry if I called her
your partner, but the point is,

you must have seen her!

Look, this is all getting very silly.

Why don't you just, uh,
pull over, stop the car?

Calm down, and you can tell me all
about it right from the beginning, okay?

No, thank you.

Well, you'll have to pull over soon
because you're out of petrol.

Please, go.

What?

Just get out.

I'm not-- I'm not gonna
take you any further.

I-I don't like you.

How unkind.

Get out or I'll get that
man to turn you out.

Hey look, I'm sorry, I...

I would've never picked you
up in the first place.

It's just that I thought
you were someone else.

I don't trust you.

And I don't trust you, either.

You shouldn't drive on your own
if you go around seeing things.

How many?

Uh, can you make sure that
man doesn't get back in again, please?

What man? I don't see anyone.

Isn't he-- I just-- He just got
out of my car just then.

Sorry, I don't see anyone. How many?

Um, it's empty. Here, better fill it up.

Thirty.

And... five makes forty.
It was almost full.

Full? But... Uh, yeah,
that's what I thought. Thank you.

- Ah!
- Ow!

- What's going on?
- Bruce?

You gave me a fright!

I gave you a fright?
Crikey, you gave me a fright.

How did you get in?

Same as you. Through the door.

- Where's Sam?
- Well, I don't know; I just got back.

Look, I come around here to find
Samantha, and there's no one home.

So I sit down for a minute.
I must have gone to sleep.

All of a sudden, there's a light in my eye, and
this mad sheila's dropping oranges on me.

- Lemons.
- And screaming in my face. Mad!

- You wouldn't be making a cup of tea, would you?
- You're right, I wouldn't.

How's that cup of tea coming along?

Bruce: Bitch.

- Anything wrong?
- It was you who frightened me, okay?

No, it's not okay.

Look, you come here to find Sam;
she's not here.

It doesn't give you the right to help yourself
to our beer and blast me out of my own flat.

I mean, I do live here, you know?

If you're so at home,
make yourself a cup of tea!

Oh, Mr. Whitehorn, you shouldn't have.

Oh, no, no, no. It was delivered.
By a young man with orange and black hair.

Stripes.

No, I suspect you're being courted,
Miss Alexander.

Now, I should be about an hour.
Carriers be coming tomorrow.

- Now, is there anything you
need before I get back?
-Uh, no, I don't think so.

- Oh, you won't have enough paper.
- Oh, yes.

Right, well, better get some, haven't we?

It's her.

Mary Carmichael's been
missing now for five weeks.

The slim 21-year-old was last seen
driving a late-model, black Jaguar...

... on highway 1 at approximately
4:30 PM, Sunday 27th of November, 19--

Oh, but that's years ago.

Considerable amounts of blood,
which matched Miss Carmichael's type,
were found in the boot.

Police believe Miss Carmichael
was not traveling alone or interested
in contacting man described...

... on page 1.

What's happening?

You can't pick up
hitchhikers who are already dead.

You look as though you've seen a ghost.

Hey, do you know anything about this?

- It's a rose. Do you like it?
- No, the newspaper.

Unilateral action by government likely?

- The photo.
- Oh, that's, um, Mary Carmichael.

- The one that was murdered.
- Yes, but they never found the body, did they?

No.

So, they don't know
whether she's alive or dead.

No. But she must be.
Ugh, horrible.

- You want to go to lunch?
- Look, wait here!

You've got to go.

I'm talking about the previous owner.

You bought it. It's yours.
You want to sell it? You sell it.

It's a price you women have to pay
for changing your minds all the time.

I don't want that car back in here.
No way. Never.

Mr. Whitehorn, would you come
back to my flat after work tonight?

- What about the
young man and the rose?
- Oh, he can't come.

- It's just, you see, I need someone--
- Oh, my dear, I'm flattered, but...

... my friend can be a very jealous man.
Besides, I have a previous commitment.

Aw, that's all right.

Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean a--

I'll think of something.

Uh, could you please drive
it up to the curb over there?

Oh, it's all right.
That way people can get past.

Yeah, okay.

- What's supposed to be wrong with this thing?
- Nothing.

Is it normal for people to learn to drive?

- Can you use this?
- No, not really.

Sam? Val?

- It's a nice color.
- It's only just been resprayed.

Seems to be in good condition.

There's no rust.

- Has it been in any accidents?
- No, not to my knowledge, no.

- Cherry, come here. Could I have a drive?
- Sure.

- Hop in.
- Come on, Cherry.

Oh, thank you.
Cherry, come here at once.

Cherry! Cherry!
Come in here! Cherry!

I'm sorry, she usually loves
going in cars.

- Don't you dare snap at mummy's friends.
- Or they might snap at you, grrr!

I can't possibly buy a car
my dog won't go in.

Oh, I don't know what's
the matter with you.

The car's haunted!

Hey, Sam, why don't
we lock the backdoor?

Don't know. Oh, no,
I have to leave it open.
I've lost my key.

That seems like asking for trouble.

I'll get one cut off mine for you.

Did Bruce give you a scare the other night?
Heard you had a go at him.

Good one. We split up.
I couldn't handle his games.

Well, the way he sulked when he lost.

Besides, Martin came along.

It's just that, you know,
anyone can get in and...

The trouble with keys is, they're never where you want them.

I want them outside, they're inside.
They're at work, they're at home.

Oh, I just can't handle them.

We put one on the meter box once,
but that soon disappeared.

Have you ever had your hair up?

No.

It'd look great.

- It would. It would look wonderful.
(Phone rings)
- Oh, Sam.

- Hey, that'll be for me.
- Come back here.

- Sam.
- Look.

Oh, wow.

- It's wonderful.
- But look how it's all
a bit tangled down here.

Uh, no. I won't leave a message.
Just tell the young lady I'm very interested.

Thank you.

Excuse me.

Just get used to this place as a laundromat,
becomes a hairdressing salon.

Yeah...
Looks good.

It's not finished yet.

- She's meeting Martin.
- Oh, poor bugger.

Hey, can you give me
a lift to work today?

I'm not driving my car, Val.
I don't like it anymore.

- Oh, come on, a couple of
days ago, it was a great car to drive.
- Well, it's not now.

- I'm selling it;
I put an ad in the paper.
- Yeah, so I gather.

- Hey, are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine.

Yeah, you don't look so good.

- Want to talk about it?
- You haven't got time, eh?

Too true. Oh, hey, that
was something about the car.

Uh, he said he'd meet you at work
because I thought it would be there.

- Did he sound very interested?
- Hard to say.

He sounded more interested
in you than the car.

(Phone rings)
Hey, I'll get it.

Margaret Alexander.

Yeah, in the paper this morning.

Oh, it's a, uh, mach 2, 2.4 liter.

Yeah, I've got it here.

It would appear that
romance is blooming.

There's no card with it.

And it cost a fortune.

Two messages for you this morning.

Wayne Wright would like to meet you for lunch at 12:30.

And a strange call from a man
who would not leave his name.

Said he'd be in touch.

You certainly seem to be
entering the gay, social world.

How's the health of your car?

No better.

I'm getting rid of it.

Perfect, I don't think
it's right for you.

I discovered it belonged
to Mary Carmichael.

Not the Mary Carmichael. The one
that was murdered? Oh, how ghastly.

It was a thoroughly nasty business.

Far too many of them
get away with it, you know.

Makes you want to
reconsider capital punishment.

Mr. Whitehorn!
Come here, come here!

Do you know that man over there?

What?

Where?

- He's gone.
- Well, who's gone?

You'll be better when
you've sold that car.

And make sure you sell it to
someone a little less sensitive.

Why are you selling it soon after buying it?

Uh, just found it a bit difficult to drive.

- Can I have a go?
- Sure.

We'll just try on the other side.

It's never done this before!

It goes really well!

Mary Carmichael, I'm going to sell
this car, whether you like it or not.

See?

You be gonna be late home, Sam?

Depends how I play my cards.

See ya.

- Oh, sorry, Meg, I didn't warn you.
- Oh, look, don't worry.
I should've checked first.

Hey, Meg. Will you be up when
I get home? About, um, 11...

Oh, maybe leave it 'til tomorrow.

It's just that I haven't had a
good talk with you,
not properly, since you've arrived.

See ya, M.

(Phone rings)

Hello?
Meg, it's for you.

Oh, thanks.

- See ya.
- Bye.

Meg Alexander.

(Phone rings)

Hello?

- Ah!
- Ah!

I thought you were asleep.
Didn't you hear us knocking?

- This is Martin.
- Hi.

Meg: Oh, um.
Martin: Sorry.

Hello, um, I'm sorry about that.

- Um. Oh! It's a, um, mach 2, 2.4 liter.
- Sam: She's a bit neurotic.

Meg: No, it's not automatic.
Martin: Oh.
Meg: It's a manual.

Sam: It's all right. Just needs a screw.

Oh, did you?
Oh, that's a shame.

Okay, never mind.

Yeah, bye.

No, thanks.

(From TV) What if something
you do doesn't work?

There's always, there will be always
be something else to do
in an attack situation.

And by having a strong head,
you can think about how to get out of it.

All right, what you can do, not what he's gonna do to you.

There will always be
a chance to do something. Always.

No! No! No!

Martin: You don't go for that
sort of thing, do you?
Meg: Oh, no, not really.

They're trained to kill.

Oh, it's disgusting.

You've only just moved
in here, haven't you?

Uh-huh.

Do you like it?

Not particularly.

Uh, what I mean is, it just
takes some getting used to.

Ah.

Wow.

See ya.

Meg: Bye.

Hey, do you like him?
I might be in later. See ya.

- Hey, Sam.
- Yeah?

- Can you ask your friends, see if they might
be interested in buying my car?
- Yeah, bye.

Ah!

You gotta be the best screamer
I ever came across.

Meg: What are you doing here?

- I'm looking for Samantha.
- Yeah, well, she's gone out.

It's okay. I'll wait.

Well, she's not gonna be
back 'til tomorrow.

Is that so?
I'll wait just the same.

G'day.

Having an early night?

You know, you don't look
too bad without makeup, huh.

You should go.

Come on, let's be friends.
Don't ya like me?

- Come on, how's about--
- No!

- I like a bit of a struggle.
- No, Bruce.

Let me go!

(Knocking) Wayne: It's me!

Wayne!

I didn't mean to frighten you.
Is everything all right?

I want this man to leave.

- I'll go when I'm good and ready.
- Meg: Now!

That's fairly plain, isn't it, mate?

Who do you think you are?

Look, you can walk out,
or I can help you out, okay?

No, I'll call the police.

You bother.

You won't get far with
that tight-ass bitch.
Anyway, she's ugly!

Ah!

I'm not the only one who won't get far.

I wasn't very nice to him, was I?

Perhaps I should've made
him a cup of tea.

Come on!

Ya bitch.

You must think I'm loopy.

Yesterday it was the car.
Today it's... night.

I don't mean to be like this.

Why do I take fright at everything?

Wayne: Do you want me to stay?
I could, if you like.

No.

Thanks, yeah, I'll be okay.

Well, tell your friend he can come
and have a look at the car tomorrow.

If he likes.

Who's that one from?

Oh, I suppose that's none of my business.

You oughta come to my place.
I can borrow my mum's car.

- I can come back and get you.
- No, I'll be all right.

I don't think he'll be back.

Any trouble from Bruce,
you give me and my mum a ring.
You know where to find us.

Thanks, Wayne.

You're not ugly at all.
You're quite nice, actually.

(Phone rings)

(Phone stops ringing)

(Loud noise in house)

Sam? Val?

Who's there?

(Phone rings)

Go away!

Oh, hello.

Oh, no, Bruce, no, I-- It's all right.
Look, I know you didn't mean it.

No. Now look you
don't have to explain to me.

Yeah, well... I overreacted.

Yeah, well, I'm not used to people
in the house when I'm not
expecting them, am I?

No, I don't think you're the Bogeyman!

No, neither does Samantha.

I don't know. Didn't talk to me.

No, she hasn't told me anything.

Hey look, Bruce,
why don't you go to bed, eh?

I mean, 'cause everything's gonna be fine in the morning.

No look there's no point
coming 'round here, okay?

I mean, Samantha's not
gonna be home 'til really late,
and I just wanna go to bed.

I've got to work in the morning.

Bruce, go to bed.

Yeah. Uh-huh.
Good night, Bruce.

Good night.

(Car horn blares)

- The bonnet!
- What?

- Open the bonnet!
- Oh, thanks!

- Thank God for that.
- Thank you.

Well, I didn't actually do anything;
it just stopped of its own accord.

But you better get it fixed, eh. Pronto!

- I'm sorry.
- Yeah, so am I.

I will not be intimidated by a car.

You are a chassis, an engine, and body work.

Get out!

Go on, out you get!

I don't believe in you!

I don't believe in you!

Mary Carmichael, I don't believe
in you for one moment.

Just go away.

What's happened in
the past is in the past.

You're a pile of nuts
and bolts and screws!

Anything wrong?

- Uh, I think I've locked
myself out of my flat.
- Well, can I help?

No, look, I'll be all right. 'Cause I
can go 'round and stay with a friend.

Suit yourself.

We have nothing to fear
except fear itself, Meg.

Wayne Wright, here I come.

(Laughing)

Please, keep driving.

I believe we have a mutual acquaintance.

A Miss Carmichael.
The Miss Mary Carmichael.

She's dead.

Someone would believe
you've seen her recently.

- She must be dead!
- You seem very certain.

Meg: Where are you taking me?

The Man: I think you know where we're going.

You're right to be frightened.

You can see the rightness in everything.

You bought the car, we met, we met again.
The conclusion is just as inevitable.

There's nothing you can do.
There's nothing I can do.

It's a terrible thing.

But there are just some
things that have to happen.

I must kill you.
For your own kindness.

Shhh. Please, please.

Don't be scared. Relax.
And enjoy it.

They say death can be a beautiful
experience. Enjoy the ecstasy
of abject terror.

Oh my God!

(Screaming)

Ah!

Meg: Mary.

Subtitles transcribed by: Superpchan/Zyuranger