Mommy's Deadly Con Artist (2021) - full transcript

What if I need you
for some of your old tricks?

- What do you got?
- If I text you some pictures,

you think you can find out
about a couple of people?

All right, send me the pics.
I'll get right on 'em.

Thank you.

Huh?

I know what you and your son
are doing here, lady.

♪ I need one little kiss ♪

♪ from lady love ♪

I'm so pumped
for this, Steph.

Been wanting to take you here
for a few weeks now.



My mouth is already watering.

Save some of that for later.

You're bad! You're so bad!

♪ When will
all my wildest dreams ♪

Did I lie? How was it?

Terrible, actually.

Really?

Landon, relax. I'm kidding.

You were right.
It was amazing.

You're amazing.

You must be getting a little
sick of me telling you that.

Are you kidding?
I love it.

I love you, Steph.

You do?



There. I finally said it.

Have you been waiting awhile?

About three months.

That's how long
we've known each other.

You're keeping track too?

I'm in love with you too,
Landon.

Yeah?

Yeah.

I can't believe
I still haven't seen your house.

Well, I wanted you to fall
in love with me, not my house.

So now that we're
in love and all,

I think it's time
that you met my mother.

She just got into town,

and she'll be staying with me
for a few weeks,

so the timing's perfect,
unless you think it's too soon.

No, no. I was about to say
the same thing to you.

I really want you
to come to the house,

meet my father and my sister.

I would love that.

Let's do it. Right away.

I don't know.
How about tomorrow?

If that's the absolute soonest.

What's wrong?

I don't know.

I mean, do you think
your father will like me?

Yes, of course he will.

I'm serious, Landon.

We come from two completely
different worlds.

Your family is like
cover of Forbes magazine.

And mine?

Well, we're... not.

None of that's important, okay?

And as far as him liking you,

as was my experience,

George Rudolph
won't know what hit him.

I hope that you're right.

How about your mother?
Think she'll like me?

Christine is just
gonna eat you up.

That's good 'cause...

Ohh... mm.

Are you okay?

Um... yeah.

I just got a little bit dizzy
all of a sudden.

I'm good.

Actually, I'm great.

Uh, hey, it's Denise.

Yeah. I need you
to do me a favor.

Should we go?

Yeah, let's.

I can't wait
for tomorrow.

Me too.

But are you sure
I can't come in tonight?

I still am
feeling a little weird.

I'm sorry.

Plus I need to get
my beauty rest for tomorrow.

Give me a break.

You won't even need
a beauty nap.

Don't forget my mom's inside.

Tomorrow. Love you.

Love you too.

- You startled me.
- How'd it go?

Excellent.

Wow.
This place is very nice.

And big.

Uh-huh.

You're looking a little nervous.
Are you all right?

Maybe I am. A little.

I need this to go right.

Now don't worry, honey.
Mama's here.

I'm gonna make sure
that man in there is yours.

All yours. And soon.

Okay.

- Hi. I'm Stephanie.
- I'm Bridget.

- Yes. Landon's mentioned you.
- He's mentioned you as well.

This is my mother, Christine.

- Hi.
- Hello.

Well, please, come on in.

I'll go get Landon for you.

Make yourselves at home.

Don't have to tell us twice.

- Wow.
- Incredible.

There they are.

Hi, baby!

Mmm, I missed you.

And now I see why
Stephanie's such a knockout.

Apple, tree.

This one's got "sweet talker"
written all over him.

Landon, this is my mother.

Mom, this is Landon.

So nice to meet you,
Ms. Barton.

Name's Christine.

And I'm a hugger, not a shaker.

Landon, Landon, Landon,
I just love your home.

I've seen places like this
only from the outside.

Thank you for hosting us today.

I should be thanking you.

Oh, I know.
She's pretty special.

She sure is.

Come meet the others.

After you.

Look who's here, dad.

Who is this handsome gentleman?

Christine, Stephanie,

this is my father, George.

Ladies, welcome to my home.

And it's a lovely home, George.

Thank you for the invitation.

Oh, it's my pleasure.

And this is Stephanie.

Hello, Mr. Rudolph.

Please, call me George.

So do you live nearby?

Oh, well, I'm just visiting
from out of town.

And I live a few towns over.

Sorry to say I'm wildly priced
out of this neighborhood.

Don't be sorry about that.

Holy smokes!

Would you look at this estate.

Ah, it's just incredible.

It's such a beautiful day.

Can we take a look
at the backyard?

Why not?

It's like
paradise out here.

Just incredible.

You should see it at night.

We'll have to do that sometime.

Now, what do we have here?

Can't you just see me now?

Big floppy hat,

sunglasses,

basking in the summer sun
with an ice-cold lemonade,

watching my future grandchildren
running their little legs off.

Mom, too soon.

Oh, I don't know.
I kinda like lemonade.

Oh, George, take a look at them.

Aren't they
the loveliest couple?

Oh, my god. So much.

Hi.

Christine, Stephanie,

this is my kid sister, Alice.

Just a few years younger,
and he still calls me a kid.

Well, George, I must say,

you do make
the most beautiful children.

Yeah, him and my mother did
a great job in that department.

Oh, I'm so sorry
to hear that she passed.

- Why? You didn't even know her.
- Alice!

Sorry, sorry.
I must be hungry or something.

Why don't we all move
into the dining room, huh?

Sounds good to me.

- Landon?
- Yes.

Would you mind
if I use the ladies' room?

Of course.
Let me show you.

Thank you.

Oh, it's just exquisite, Landon.

- How do you like it?
- Oh, it's beautiful.

Right over here, Christine.

Can you find your way back?

Oh, yes, I can handle it.

Mine.

Christine?
Everything all right?

Yes! I-I'll be right there!

Ma'am?

Bridget, hi!

- What are you doing in here?
- Oh, well, I'm sorry.

I was using the ladies' room,

and I remembered that I had an
important email to check up on.

So you just walk into
a stranger's study

and use his computer
without permission?

Permission?

Oh, well, it's just an email.

I-I didn't think
he'd really mind.

But you're...

You're absolutely right.

I-I should've asked him first.

Can we just keep this
between the two of us?

My daughter is madly in love,

and she's trying to make a good
first impression on the family,

and she will never forgive me

if I'm the reason
that it all goes south.

Well, Landon is
in love with her too,

so we can keep this between us.

Oh, thank you, Bridget.
You're a lifesaver.

Can I show you
to the others now, please?

Absolutely.

There she is.
Did you get lost?

Oh, I did.
Bridget found me.

Could you take a quick picture
of all of us?

- Thank you.
- Oh, do we have to?

I hate having my photo taken.

Why is that?

Oh, I feel self-conscious,
I guess.

You have nothing
to worry about, Christine.

You look beautiful.

Come over here.
Stand next to your daughter.

Oh, all right. Just one.

Got it.

Thank you.

So how'd you two meet?

At a sports bar, of all places.

Really?

I was just there, watching
a game with a few friends.

- She came right up to me...
- Excuse me.

Honey, are you okay?

You look a little pale.

I-I didn't want to say anything,

but I am feeling
a little bit off.

Oh, no. You're not
feeling well again?

Same thing happened
last night at dinner.

Um, I'm okay, really.

Just a little lightheaded,
that's all.

We're all together.

We're having a nice time.
Let's just enjoy the day.

So how come there's no cute,
fluffy animals scurrying around?

Well, that would be my fault.

I have a bad allergy
and underlying condition.

Oh, no. What is it?

Well, dad's asthmatic.

I mean, you've seen him
with his inhaler.

Oh, is that what's going on?

Here I was thinking
it was just me

you were losing
your breath over.

Sorry. Did I forget to mention
that my mother

has no filter sometimes?

You certainly don't need
to apologize for your mom.

Before we eat, I'd just like
to make a quick toast.

I want to say how nice it is

when two families can
come together like this.

It's so awesome.

I'm sure this will be
just the first of many meals

shared between
the Bartons and Rudolphs.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

Cheers.

Dinner's almost ready.

Detective Jenkins.

Hey, did you get
what I overnighted you?

That empty wine glass?

The one with
the fingerprints on it? Yeah.

And what exactly
am I supposed to do with it?

What do you think? Find out
whose fingers they were.

Supposedly they belong to
a woman named Stephanie Barton,

but you tell me
if that checks out or not.

On what basis?

On the basis I don't think
that's her real name.

Look, Denise, I can't go
wasting taxpayers' good money

on folks who may or may not
have committed a crime.

Should I just call the police?

Isn't that what you're doing?

I'm talking to a friend
who was kind to me a year ago

when that maniac
killed someone I loved.

Denise...

Look, you worked
with my husband for years.

- Now you owe him.
- Fine!

- I'll send it to the lab.
- Thank you.

But I hope you understand.

You sticking your nose
back into this

puts you at risk.

I get why you're
obsessed with her.

Just let me know
what you find out.

I'm just so embarrassed.

I can't believe
that I ruined today.

Baby, it's okay.

Oh, you didn't ruin
anything, honey.

Listen to your mom.

Despite the way it ended,
it still went great.

In fact, my dad's
so worried about you,

he wants me to call him,
let him know you're okay.

Am I okay?
I still feel so queasy.

What's wrong with me?

Stephie, are you late?

What do you mean?

I mean with
her monthly visitor, Landon.

Actually, by a few weeks maybe?

And the last couple of days,
you've been nauseous, headaches.

Didn't you tell me recently
you've been exhausted?

Yeah. It's not as if
I'm not sleeping.

I felt the same way
33 years ago.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.
You don't think that I’m...

Pregnant?
I'd bet the house on it.

Oh, my god. Oh, my god.

A-Are you serious?
I might be a father?

Well, let's find out.

I picked up a home pregnancy
test on the way over here.

That's why you had me stop?

A mom tends to know
these things.

Well, should we go into the
other room and test my theory?

- This is so crazy.
- Tell me about it.

Well, come on.
Let's go into the bathroom.

Do you need a hand?

No, I've got her.

So? How'd I do?

Ehh.

Hey, I've never been
pregnant before.

How do I know how they act?

I sold it enough though, right?

Yeah, you did fine.

But we have
a lot more work to do.

So where's the test?

Here.

And you really think
he's just gonna believe

this piece of plastic?

Don't worry, darling.
I've got a lot more planned.

We've got this.

Well, what's the verdict?

Two bars.

Meaning...

You're gonna be a daddy, Landon.

Landon.

Hey.

How's Stephanie?

Uh, pregnant, apparently.

You joking?

Did you just say
you knocked this girl up?

We weren't trying to.
It just happened, I guess.

You guess.

How do you know this?

She took a pregnancy test.

Showed me the stick afterwards.
Two bars.

Well, that doesn't
mean anything.

Anyone can get their hands
on one of those.

I knew a girl in college
who tried to trap her boyfriend

with that same technique.

That's ridiculous.

Is it? Son, you've always been
a little gullible,

and your judgment's definitely
been questionable.

What's wrong with my judgment?

Fine. I made a bad call or two
with work, but...

I don't know.

Maybe this will be exactly
the thing I need to focus more.

Yeah, 'cause a crying baby's
good for focusing.

I'm not trying to insult you.

It's just I'm used to people
trying to take advantage of me.

It's what happens when you have
a lot to take advantage of.

Well, I like to believe
in the good in people.

I did too, till I was
about 10 years old.

It's time you grew up, son.

That's what I'm trying to do.

It's her.

So answer.

Hey, baby. How you feeling?

Okay. Yeah.

Yeah, sure, I can do that.
Tomorrow's fine.

Just let me know what time.
Okay.

Call me back.

Okay. Love you.

Stephanie's setting up
an appointment with her ob-gyn.

Wants me to go with her.

My eyes are open, guys, okay?

But I know this girl.

I know her.
She wouldn't lie to me.

Fine.

See what the doctor says,
then we'll go from there.

This guy must be good.

- He's three towns away.
- He's the best.

Jesus, Landon, what if we're
actually having a kid?

Oh, you are, trust me.

Are you as freaked out as I am?

I'd say that's
an accurate assessment.

Maybe more.

Don't worry.
We'll figure it out.

I don't know about you two,

but something about all this
feels just right.

Yeah.

Me too.

- Oh!
- And how are we doing in here?

We're all a little anxious.

Speak for yourself.

Well, let's end the mystery,
shall we?

I got your test results.

And?

And the results are confirmed.

Congratulations, mommy.

Oh, I knew it!
I just knew it!

Was that too much?
I don't want to hurt the baby.

Landon, I've been pregnant
for like a minute.

You're not gonna break me.

Congratulations, baby.

Will you two mind leaving us
alone, so we can wrap things up?

Sometimes mommies-to-be
have embarrassing questions

they like to ask their doctor.

You got it.

- We'll be right outside.
- Okay.

So...

Are you a good man, Landon?

Excuse me?

I said, "are you a good man?"

My gut tells me you are.

And Stephanie surely says so.

I just hope that you really do
love my daughter like you say.

I really do.

Good, because now
there's a child in the mix,

and a child needs a mother
and a father at home together.

That was the way
I was raised, Christine

and that's how I plan
on raising my kids.

All right, then.
I feel better.

- I can't believe this.
- Yeah.

I still can't believe
you got this girl pregnant.

You know her name is Stephanie.

Who you've known
for like 12 weeks.

So what?

So you know what do you know
about her?

What do you know about anything?

I am just so relieved
that you're okay.

I'm good, George.

Just got this baby
growing my belly.

Be honest with me.

What do you really think
about all this?

Well, I think that I will do
the grandpa thing very well.

What do you think?

I think that you're awesome.

Well, I don't know about that.

Look, Landon, I know
we don't always get along,

but I need to look out
for the family, don't I?

You would do the same for me.

I mean, these women are
pretty much strangers to us.

And if anything, I don't want to
see you get hurt by this girl.

Thank you for that, really,
but I trust Stephanie.

So that means
I trust her mother too.

- Hi, guys.
- Hey.

I love your necklace.
It's so pretty.

Thank you.
I guess yours too.

- Thanks.
- I guess, huh?

Yeah.

- Some day, huh?
- You can say that again.

We're gonna be
grandparents.

I just can't believe it.

It's wonderful, isn't it?

I just...

I just wish they were married,
that's all.

Oh, you and me too, believe me.

But with Stephanie pregnant,

I will definitely support 'em,
no matter what.

I just can't wait
to meet the little booger.

You know, I've been thinking.

It might be a good idea if
Stephanie moved in here with us,

so we can make her
as comfortable as possible.

I think she would really
love that idea.

And you too.

Me? Really?

As far as I'm concerned,

you are more than welcome to
stay with us through the birth.

George, I can't believe it.

Thank you! You're the best!

You are so welcome.

Mine.

Controversial policies,

then it becomes a matter
to all Europeans

who invest in those issues
and other nations,

and that political statements
have taken...

- Hi.
- Hi, George.

Where are the others?

Let's see. Uh, Alice is
over at a friend's house,

Stephanie and Landon,
they went out,

and I don't know where.

Well, that's good.

I'm sure they could use some
alone time, like all of us.

Like all of us.

What are we watching here?

Just a little cable news.

Oh, we could do
so much better than that.

Text from Landon.

Oh, really? What does it say?
Is everything all right?

Look at that.

Okay.

I feel ridiculous.

You're not trying
to kidnap me, are you?

Come on, just a few more steps.

Okay, enough.
I want my eyes back.

Okay, okay.

This is where we met.

I was sitting right over there
at that booth

when you came up to me
and changed my life forever.

Do you remember what you said?

- No.
- You said,

"move! I can't see the game!"

No, I did not say that.

Yeah, you did.

It was only so you could
sidle up next to me.

Well, that part, I remember.

It was so crowded in here
that night.

- There's no one in here now.
- I noticed.

Is that your doing?

Oh, look, our bartender
has our drinks ready.

Sorry we can't both
have our usual.

- Grab 'em though, will you?
- Sure thing.

Thank you.

So which one of these is for me?

Oh, my god!

Oh, my god! Oh, my god!

Will you marry me, Steph?

- Yes?
- Yes!

Yes! Yes!

This is crazy.

Are you happy?

I'm so happy. Are you?

So many changes.

I know what I want.

I can't wait
to tell our parents.

I don't think you'll have
to wait all that long.

- Mom?
- Oh!

Let me see, let me see.

Ohh!

- Oh, congratulations, you two.
- Thank you.

Heard there was some kind of
event going on here tonight.

- Off to bed?
- I am.

You gonna stay up for a while?

I don't know. I'm bushed.

What a day.

You said it.
You all settled in your room?

Oh, yes. It's just perfect.

Thank you, George.

Oh, it's a done deal.

Our kids are getting hitched,
and we're gonna be grandparents.

We're gonna make a great team.

Morning, dad.

- Morning, son.
- How you feeling?

Feeling good.
How about you?

Feeling good, thank you.

I could take some more
of that coffee, if you will.

Yeah, sure.

Thank you.
So where's your fiancée?

She is still sleeping.

Last couple of nights
have been a little rough,

nausea and all.

I remember when your mother
was pregnant with you.

She spent half the time
hovered over the toilet.

You know...

I'm proud of you, son.

For what, knocking up Stephanie?

Anybody can get a girl pregnant.

But not everybody steps up.

Not everybody
does the right thing.

Might be the nicest thing
you've ever said to me.

Look, it's not that
I don't love you.

It's just that I expect more.

Trust me, dad, I know.

Look, I know that
I'm a little hard on you,

but if not me, then who?

I get it.

I'm just really glad
you're cool with all this.

I know it was
a pretty big surprise.

Well, Stephanie's with child.

You both seem very happy.

You're being responsible.
You're doing the right thing.

I can't ask for more than that.

So...

Christine's
a real sweetheart, huh?

A real pistol too.

Yeah, you might say that.

Do you like her?

I just met the woman.

Well, she seems
to really fancy you.

Oh, really?
When did you become British?

Look, I just want
to let you know,

as far as mom goes,

if something were to happen
between the two of you,

like romantically or anything,

I think it'd be a good thing.

Well, I appreciate that,

but I'm not so sure
your sister would agree.

Yeah. I haven't seen
too much of her lately.

Yeah, she's been spending time
with friends,

avoiding the house.

Alice is young.
She misses mom.

We all do.

But... I mean, who knows?

Maybe having someone like
Christine in the house right now

is exactly what she needs.

Good morning, gentlemen!

- Good morning.
- Good morning.

Oh, have you boys eaten?

Oh, it's Bridget's day off.

I could whip something up
for you real quick.

That's fine, thank you.

All I need is this fuel
right here.

I'm good, thank you.

How'd you sleep?

Like a log.
I'm just so comfy here.

How's my stephie doing?

She had a tough night.
She's getting some rest.

Yeah, what to expect
when you're expecting.

And how about you, George?
Did you get your rest?

I got my full eight, thank you.

Then you might have the energy

to properly show me around
this house, finally.

Haven't I?

Ma'am, I am embarrassed.

With all the craziness
going on around here,

let me make up for it.

Give you the cook's tour
right now.

I'm ready.

Saddle up, ma'am.

Have a good time, kids.

Oh, thank you, son.

Here we go.

Well, thank you for the tour.

My pleasure.

Oh, you say that like
it's a request or something.

You know, you have never told me
what line of business you're in.

Steel.

George, don't tease a girl.

How are you feeling?

A little better.

Where is everyone?

I think my dad's still showing
your mom around Casa de Rudolph.

How adorable would it be
if they got together too?

Yeah, like some terrible sitcom
you can't turn off.

This is my favorite room
in the whole house.

Mm. Wow, George.

I've never seen
anything like it.

The men I've dated
since Stephie's father passed,

and including Stephie's father,

they were all good men,

but they didn't exactly
light the world on fire

when it came to making money.

There's nothing wrong with that.

I know you say that,

but I still feel like
a country mouse

in a city mouse world.

There's more to a man
than his bank account.

Same is true for a woman.

Have you read all those?

For the most part.

"A man is known
by the books he reads."

Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Oh, and you know
your poetry too.

Of course you do.

Lady Chatterley's lover?

Why, I've read that one twice,
actually.

You're a bit of a dirty bird.

Oh, that's a nice chess set.

Is it just for show?

Are you kidding?

I use chess strategies to make
most of my business ones.

Do you play?

I thought you'd never ask.

I just love this game.

You sit across
from another person,

your competitor,

and you just watch all
the pieces move on the table.

One piece here,
one piece there...

And you never know what
the other person's thinking.

Exactly.

It's kind of
a microcosm of life.

That's what my father felt.

He taught me how to play
when I was barely 10 years old.

I think he just wanted
someone to play with.

But, boy, did I love
those afternoons.

Rainy days especially.

I used to play Ellen in
this room at least twice a week.

She'd beat me most days.

But every once in a while,
she'd let me win.

You must miss her a lot.

You don't spend the better part
of your life with a person

and not feel the loss
when they're gone.

That's a sweet thought, George,

and I agree with you.

But our lives aren't over yet.

Point taken.

It's your move, Christine.

I thought I just made it.

Checkmate.

Oh, George.

Well done.

- Wanna go take a nap?
- Yeah, let's go.

Hello.

Oh, Bridget!

Uh, I thought today
was your day off.

Yeah, looks like you did.

I forgot something.
I had to come back and get it.

Well, I bet you're wondering
what I'm doing in here.

Yeah, since it is
the second time I caught you

going through
George's things, I am.

Uh, well, I have just got
a mother of a headache,

and I was looking
in his bathroom,

and I didn't see any aspirin,

so I thought that I would check
his nightstand real quick

and...

Great! So you wouldn't mind

if I went and told him
you were in here.

Well, you know, I...

I got the headache from playing
chess with him all morning,

so I don't think he'll mind.

Come on,
let's go tell him together.

Fine.

I really don't know why

you're making such a big deal
about this.

Wait! Wait! I just have
one last thing to say.

What?

Have a nice trip, bitch.

Oh, my god. Bridget!

And how long
was she working for you?

She'd been running our house
for a few years.

I can't believe she's dead.

I know. One day she's here
taking care of us, the next...

I'm so sorry. I know
how much you liked her.

Did anyone actually see her
take the fall?

No.

I mean, I don't think so.
I know I didn't.

It was her day off. She
shouldn't even have been here.

She must have come back
for something.

Where were you all
when it happened?

We were taking a nap upstairs.

I was out back,
reading the paper.

I was outside on the phone with
a friend when I came in, and...

And she was just
laying there on the floor.

How about you?

Me? Oh, well...

I had been playing chess
with George all morning,

and then I went up to my room
to relax for a bit.

You know, I barely knew her,
but I...

I just feel awful about this.

Yeah, well, you'll be surprised

how often accidents happen
in the home, just like this.

As common as a cold.

Mm. It's just such a shock.

It's terrible.

What really happened up here?

Bridget fell down the steps.

Fell or pushed?

Now why would someone
want to do that?

Tell me the truth.

I don't have
to tell you anything.

Forget about the maid.
It's old news.

And get your head
back into the game.

Shh! Shh!

You scared the hell out of me.
What are you doing out here?

Calm down. I just had to come by
and touch base with you

before I make my play.

I should just calm down then.

Thank you
for the brilliant advice.

I'm kind of in the middle
of something in there.

Yeah, I know.

So is everything still going
according to plan?

So far, so good, I guess.

Yeah? No major surprises?

Just a dead maid.

Took a tumble down
the staircase yesterday.

Dead maid. Yeah, that's
kind of a left turn there.

I know she's lying about it.
Says the woman fell,

but she had to have had some
help falling down the stairs.

By help, I mean a big old push.

Yeah, that sounds like
a classic.

She's gotta be
holding all the cards,

working all the angles.

And keeping us in the dark
just long enough

to get us to do
what she needs done.

She definitely has an M.O.

And she can't find out
that I told you about this.

Well, trust me,
I'm not gonna tell her.

She would never trust

that we wouldn't try
to double-cross her on this,

and then she would put a stop to
this before we even got started.

I can't have that happen.

I need this money
to come through.

Yeah? You and me both.

Okay, when we're in there
alone with her,

what are you gonna do?

I'm gonna get into actor mode

and just keep pretending
that we're complete strangers.

You nail this part,
and I promise you we are golden.

Now what am I gonna tell her
about how I tracked her down?

You got anything?

Um, I don't know.
I don't think so.

We did take this engagement
photo that got posted online.

It's all of us together,
one big happy family.

Couldn't you say
you came across it

and recognized your old partner?

Yeah, yeah, that's good.
That'll work.

Really hope I didn't
make a mistake,

pulling you into this.

Oh, yeah? That's funny

'cause that's exactly
what I thought last year

when I found you, hmm?

Scamming all those guys
in that online dating crap.

Who helped you out, huh?
Who gave you a chance

on a better score
to get some training?

You don't have
to keep reminding me.

I know that I owe you.

After this, you won't.

All right,
I better get back inside

before someone gets suspicious.

Well, off you go.

I'll see you later.

I was just thinking.

Well, I hope it's not about
moving that rook too soon.

No, no. I was thinking

maybe we should postpone
the wedding for a while.

Why? Because of Bridget?

Well, that and things have been
moving pretty fast around here.

Might be time to put brakes on
for a bit.

Well, maybe we should
talk about that.

We are talking about it.

I just think a pause
might be in order.

Who's that?

I'm not expecting anyone.
Are you?

No.

Oh.

God, I forgot
we don't have Bridget anymore.

- Do you want me to get it?
- No, no, I'll get it.

- Yes?
- Hello there.

Hi.

You must be Stephanie's fiancé.

I'm James.

Landon.

I have heard nothing but
good things about you.

Oh, well, come on in.

Stephanie, Christine!

There's someone here
to see you guys.

Thought you weren't
expecting anyone.

I'm not.

You two have a visitor.
Your cousin James stopped by.

Isn't that great?

- Hey!
- James.

Auntie Christine.

What are you doing here?

I'm here to see my favorite
auntie and cousin.

Come here you.
How long has it been?

I don't know.
You tell me.

Too long. Far too long.

And how did you find us?

My mother told me that you're
not staying at Stephanie's.

You're staying here instead,
so I figured the heck with it.

I'll just drop by
and surprise you.

You sure did.

What's going on?

Oh, well, this is
my nephew James.

James, I'm George Rudolph.

I know who you are you are.
You're George Rudolph.

Steel mogul.
Andrew Carnegie of our time.

You're going
a little too far there.

- Well, it's an honor, sir.
- Nice bottle.

You heard Stephanie's pregnant,
I take it.

I couldn't very well show up
empty-handed now, could I?

Champagne for everyone, except
for the mother, of course.

So, auntie Christine,

are you happy to see me or what?

Thrilled to death.

Welcome.

Oh, I do love this room
you have here, aunt Chris.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

It is a nice room, James.

It'd be a flippin' shame
if I had to mess it up

by shooting you.

What, you mean again?

Careful. It'd be a lot harder
to explain away this

than the maid.

I don't know
what you're talking about.

What are you doing here, James?

Well, I'm getting in
on the action.

What gives you any right to
just get in on the action, huh?

So I'll tell you.

I was, uh, abruptly eliminated

from the last score that I had
here with your mother,

so we're gonna make that right.

You shot this guy?
Your last partner?

No. He got in the way
of someone else's bullet.

Oh...
This is getting so out of hand.

First the maid goes down,
and this dude shows up?

I came here to make money, okay?

I don't want to kill anyone.

Having second thoughts?

I know I'm not.

Hey, I got pushed out of
the money on that job too.

But you didn't have to
take a bullet for the effort.

- Do you know what the grift is?
- Of course I do.

It's your standard
screw, marry, run.

You find yourself
in a family way

from the nice,
unsuspecting sack downstairs,

then you get him
to make it official.

Oh, by the way, bang-up job.
I can tell.

That is one smitten kitten.

Meanwhile, you are cozying up
to the rich old man

and making him comfortable
with the idea

of combining the families.

And when they're not looking,
you clean out the accounts,

and you get the hell
out of here.

What are we supposed
to do with this?

Steph, where are you?

I'll be right there!

Better go.

Steph?

Coming!

So who told you we were here?

Oh.

I saw the nicest engagement
announcement online.

Damn it.

You look different,

but I would never
forget that face.

Look, this is happening.
Deal with it.

Unless, of course, you want me
to go downstairs right now,

blow this whole thing up.

You made the last job personal.

That was a onetime mistake.

All right. I can use you.

What do you want me to do?

Just play the charming cousin
for the time being,

and when the time comes
for you to step it up,

I'll let you know.

Rate?

Twenty percent.
Not a penny more.

Deal.

Let's talk about tonight.

You know what?
It's been the longest day.

Can we talk
after I grab a quick shower?

Make yourself at home.

You certainly have.

So are you surprised
I found you?

Not really.

My random luck isn't nearly
as good as the luck I make.

No hard feelings
me crashing the party?

No, we're good.

You think any of this
is gonna be a problem?

No. I got this one
lock, stock and barrel.

Ha! I've heard that before.

I got it handled.

Alice, can we have
a little chat,

maybe in the dining room?

Come on.

Would anyone care for a refill?

Thanks, man.
I think we're good.

No problem.

- What?
- I'm just thinking about mom.

Do you think she'd approve?

Yes, I think she would.

If you two are as lucky to have

as many incredible years
as we did,

you'll be fine.

Well, dad, if you keep inching
down the road you're on,

I'd say you're gonna go
two for two.

So what do you want?

I'm more concerned about
what you want right now.

Well, I don't want to be here,
that's for sure.

My father made me come.

That's because
he's worried about you.

It's been pretty chaotic
around here.

Chaotic?
A woman died in our house.

Yeah, and that's a tragedy,

but you heard
what the detective said.

These things happen
all the time.

Meaning what, exactly?

Meaning that we have
to look forward.

We have to concentrate on the
good things that life provides,

especially when it comes
to your mother.

Don't talk about my mother.

I only bring her up
in the spirit of gratitude.

Look at your brother over there.

Don't you just think future
fatherhood when you see him?

And you,
you're gonna be an aunt.

Now, don't you worry.

Everything works out
the way it's supposed to.

Can I have everyone's
attention, please?

Your father wants us.

Come on in.

I'd like to propose a toast
to my son Landon

and my future daughter-in-law,
Stephanie.

It was Mark twain who said
to find the full value of joy,

you have to have someone
to divide it with.

May you two divide it together
till the end of your days.

Cheers.

Hear, hear.

Thanks... dad.

That was a beautiful toast,
George.

Well, I think I'll put on
some music.

Yeah, sure.

- Excuse me, please.
- Of course.

Hey.

Hello, cousin.

Finding your way around?

Well this is not my first rodeo,

but judging from
the looks of it,

it might be yours.

I'm green,
but I'm not that green.

Any advice?

Do not let this get personal,

like I did on my last job.

Whatever's gonna happen
to these people,

it's gonna happen.

She's a real smoothie, huh?

Huh. Sure is.

Just about the best
I ever worked with,

right up to the point
when she shot me.

You need a new drink.

- That, I do.
- Can I refill that for you?

James, thank you, sir.

You're welcome.

Let me get you another one.
Yo, sir.

- Thanks so much.
- Certainly.

George, let me
tuck you in, honey.

Ah, that's right.

That's right.

Inhaler, inhaler.

Are you excited, George?

- Inhaler!
- Do you need? Where is it?

Oh, there!
Oh, oh, George!

What's wrong?
Is that empty, George?

- What the hell?
- What's wrong?

Oh, here!

Oh, no, George.
That one's empty too.

Who's supposed to fill these?

Oh, try this one.
Might have a little more juice.

Aww!

Oh, come on.
Take a little more deep breaths.

- Come on, come on.
- You bitch! You bitch!

George, I've been called worse.

You go, poor baby.

Go, go, go.
On your last breath?

George?

George?

George?

All right, now.

George! George!

Help! Help! Oh, George!

George, are you breathing?

Help George!
Help us! Help us!

Bring some inhalers!
He can't breathe!

Aw, George, I'm so sorry.

Mission accomplished, baby.

See you on the other side.

Did you really have
to put the old man in a coma?

What choice did I have?

He was gonna
postpone the wedding,

and we couldn't have that.

What did you think the
shelf life is on us being here?

You told this guy the plan
and not me?

It's on a need-to-know basis,
and he needed to know.

Steph? Steph?

We're out by the pool.

Look, when in doubt,
stick to the plan.

We're close now.

Hi, baby.

Hey.

How's your father?

Still in a coma.

Doctors have no idea
how long it's gonna be.

Alice stayed back
at the hospital.

Maybe I should have
stayed with her.

I'm glad that you're here.

I just don't understand
how this happened.

They found a bunch of ibuprofen
in his system.

Did you see him
take any pills last night?

No, I didn't see him
take anything.

But now that you mention it,

he did mention
something about a headache.

Those things bring on
asthma attacks all the time.

Well, he had a little bit
to drink too.

Maybe he wasn't
thinking straight.

I just don't understand

why there weren't
more inhalers nearby.

There usually are.

He keeps a few in the nightstand
next to his bed.

Well, he looked in that drawer,
and it was empty.

Whose job is it
to keep it stocked?

Bridget.

Hmm. Who we can't even
ask about it now anyway.

Maybe we should
put off the wedding

until we know
what's going on with him.

I agree.

We could have
a nice, simple ceremony:

City hall,

justice of the peace,

just us.

I don't know.

Well, if it helps any,

your father and I
had a lovely chat

about the two of you
getting married.

What did he say?

Just how delighted he was

that you had stepped up
to the plate so quick.

He just couldn't wait
for you two to be official.

Really?

Oh, yes.

But if we did this now,
he'd miss the ceremony.

We're still gonna have
a big wedding bash for everyone.

It's just TBA for now.

I know your father
is gonna pull through this.

I just know it.

It might take him a little while
to come back to us,

but when he does,

he is gonna be so happy

that you fulfilled
your commitment to my daughter.

What do you want to do?

I want to do
what you want to do.

And you really think
this is what he'd want?

Absolutely.

Then let's give it to him.

His father's son
through and through.

Hmm.

Hey.

Oh, well, Alice!

I thought you were
at the hospital still.

How's George?

Well, he's in a coma,
so how good can he be?

I just spoke to Landon.

He said they're still
getting married after all this.

Mm. Love conquers all.
Isn't it nice?

He said something about you
and my father talking about it.

We did. We talked about time
and how precious it was.

It doesn't sound much like him.

Well, he was telling me that
all he had in his life was...

His work and you and Landon,

and he wanted to bask more in
the joys of family,

especially now that
your mom had passed away.

He just seemed so thrilled

that his legacy was gonna grow
with this baby,

but he wanted it to be
legitimate.

Yeah, he would say that part.

Alice, look at me.

Your father is gonna
come out of that coma,

and when he does,
he is going to burst with pride

that we took charge and made
that marriage happen, okay?

Okay.

So with the power vested in me

by the state of California,

I now pronounce you
husband and wife

till death do you part.

- Ooh! Mm!
- Ah.

- Hey, Ron.
- Denise.

Where are you right now?

Outside the house, aren't you?

I shouldn't even tell you this,

but I had those prints checked

from the wine glass you sent me.

Mm-hmm, go on.

You should visit
a Dr. McCarthy.

I'll text the address.

Hello, I'm Dr. McCarthy.

Nice to meet you, doctor.

So what's your problem today?

Less of a problem,
more of a question.

Most people sitting
in that chair have one or two.

Ask away.

You have a pregnant patient,
Stephanie Barton.

She was in here recently
with a couple of other people.

Yeah, I remember Stephanie.

How can you when her real name
is Samantha Geller?

Uh...

I had her prints checked,
so that dog won't hunt.

I know nothing about that.

She's not pregnant at all,
is she?

I'm sorry. I'm not permitted to
discuss other patients' health.

I hear that, Dr. McCarthy,

but did you hear that someone
died when those women moved in,

and another one's in a coma.

I know nothing
about that either,

but it sounds like a situation
that you should stay away from.

Well, thank you
for your time, doctor.

I'm sure you'll be hearing
a lot more about this.

Good day.

Hello.

This is Dr. McCarthy.

Oh, hi, doctor.

Is there a problem?

Oh, yeah.

I'm listening.

Some woman just left my office.

She's asking if Stephanie Barton
was actually pregnant.

Who?

Did she leave a name?

Yeah, Denise Lewis.

I don't know who that is.

She said Stephanie's
not even her real name.

I can tell she thinks
the whole thing's a scam.

Damn it.

I'm kinda freaking out.

Just calm down.
I'll handle it.

She told me someone involved
in the whole thing died,

and someone else is in a coma.

Sorry, doc.
Above your pay grade.

This is not
what I signed up for.

No. What you signed up for was
to help us falsify a pregnancy.

Now, I'm not an expert
on the Hippocratic oath,

but I'm fairly confident
that this kind of thing

doesn't get you named
doctor of the year.

- Man.
- In fact...

It most likely
gets your license revoked

or maybe something worse
would happen to you.

Worse?

Just keep the doctor-patient
confidentiality

and leave this alone.

I told you I'm handling it.

Man.

Just got a disturbing phone call
from our good doctor.

Apparently there's a woman

asking not-good questions
about us.

Are you serious?

She claims that you're
not really pregnant.

How would she know that?

I have no idea,

but I'm sure
she doesn't have any proof,

or we would've heard something.

I don't know who she is
or how she got onto us,

but we can't afford
any more exposure on this job.

So what? You plan on just
giving up on the whole thing?

Hell no!
We didn't come this far

to leave without
a flippin' payday.

How long before you can
get into Landon's accounts?

He sent the paperwork
to the bank,

combining our accounts.

Should be by tomorrow morning.

Then we finish this thing
tonight.

What do you have in mind?

I'm thinking in a little while,

there's going to be
a home invasion,

which you'll be handling.

Put me in, coach.
I'm ready to go.

Then what happens?

One last tragedy
befalls the Rudolphs.

Alice and Landon will be killed
during the break-in.

Is that really necessary?

It's not what
I had in mind either,

but we have a problem
in our rearview,

and we have to clear the board.

So tomorrow morning,

when everyone's trying to figure
out what the hell happened here,

we'll be cleaning out
Landon's accounts

and getting as far away
from here as possible.

He's in the house right now,
but I haven't seen her though.

Do you know where Alice is?

- Here you go.
- Thank you.

- Um, hi.
- Hi.

Do you have a few minutes
to talk? It's important.

I'm sorry I don't know
who you are.

It's about your houseguests.

What about them?

Um...

So I know this is
going to sound crazy,

but the women
living in your house,

they aren't
who they say they are.

What are you talking about?

- The older one.
- Christine?

Whatever name she's going by
these days,

she's a con artist.

I knew something
was wrong with them.

How do you know her?

She tried to scam a friend
of mine out of her money,

but I couldn't prove it
before she disappeared,

any more than I can prove
she's scamming your family

for your money right now.

So wait, you don't have
any proof of this?

Well, the younger one,
I had her fingerprints checked,

and her name,
it isn't Stephanie Barton.

It's Samantha Geller.

And that doctor of hers,
I asked him a few questions too.

I don't think
she's pregnant at all.

My brother married this girl
two days ago.

Oh, that's not good.

Why didn't you go
to the police with this?

Because you can't have
someone arrested

just for going by
a different name,

and they haven't done anything
illegally to you guys yet.

Nothing provable, anyway.

Well, what am I
supposed to do now?

I wish I had the answer to that.

But I just wanted you
to know what I know.

I don't want to see you get
burned like my friend almost did

or for anyone else
to wind up dead.

Dead?

My ex-husband, he got murdered
during her last job.

Oh, my god.
She killed Bridget.

And I bet she's the reason
my father's in a coma.

I'm sorry. I have to go.

Pick up, pick up, pick up.

Hey, it's Landon. I can't come
to the phone right now,

but you know what to do.

Damn it, Landon!

You doing okay?

'Cause you look a little jumpy.

Yeah, well, it's about to get
real ugly here very soon.

Yeah. Well, you don't have
to be here when it goes down,

so why don't you stop
thinking about that?

Hey, we are fast approaching
the finish line,

so you need to lose
those jitters.

Look at me.

You did a great job.

Now, she had no idea
that we knew each other before.

You're really just okay
killing Landon and Alice?

It's not the part of the job
I look forward to,

but sometimes it's a job.

Best thing to do is do it,

forget about it.

They're just both
really good people.

Yeah, who happened
to unfortunately

be in the way of our goal.

I've seen that look
in your eyes before.

It's usually
some small-time grifter

who's looking to get
deeper into the game.

You know, if this lifestyle
isn't right for you,

now's about the time
you usually figure that out.

So what's it gonna be?

I'm fine.

Now go find
that husband of yours.

Kiss him goodbye.

You sure it's okay? I don't
think we'll be back too late.

Take your time.
You two deserve a night out.

Just be sure
to bring me back some dessert.

A big one.
I'm about to earn it.

Are you all right?

You're just a good man, Landon.
That's all.

- I love you.
- I love you too.

We'll be back in about an hour.

Don't sweat it.

It'll be done
before you get back.

Now where's that new
hubby of yours right now?

He'll be going for a jog
for the next 30 minutes or so.

Perfect.

Anyone seen his sister?

No, but if she doesn't get back
before we get back,

just do Landon
and trash the house real good.

We'll take care of Alice
when we get back,

if we need to.

- Done.
- Okay.

Now, you all enjoy
your meal now.

Same to you.

Ooh, yummy!
Does this look good!

What are you gonna order?

A little loud, aren't you?

Just loud enough to be alibied,

but not loud enough
to be suspicious.

Landon.

- What?
- They're gonna kill us.

- What do you mean?
- They're con artists!

They're planning to kill us
right now.

Are you sure?

I just remembered.
What about James?

- What about him?
- He doesn't have an alibi.

Yeah, well, he'll have to come
up with something on his own,

or he'll find himself
in a heap of trouble.

Either way, we'll be long gone
before it catches up to us.

Hey!

Alice.

Yeah, that's my real name.

What's yours?

Now what's wrong?

Nothing.

- What?
- It's just...

I was really hoping
nobody had to die on this job.

Best-laid plans.

I've seen it happen
time and time again.

Just be happy that
we still have an off-ramp.

So what are you
gonna do next?

Where will you go?

I never really know that answer.

Doesn't that ever get old?

Not yet.

Well, let me know
where you land,

in case I get a job
I want to hire you on.

You got it.

- No.
- What?

No!

What's wrong?

Steady.

No! No, no, no, no!

Ohh! Ugh!

Cheers.

- Cheers.
- Mmm!

- Thanks for joining us.
- Thanks for having me.

This is a nice sports bar.

- How's your dad doing?
- He's good, actually.

Came out of the coma yesterday.

He's confused as hell
as to what went down,

but he'll be back out here soon,
reading his newspaper again.

I'm glad.
I'm glad he's okay.

And we're okay too,
all 'cause of you.

I just thank god
that you stopped those maniacs

from doing what they had
planned for you two.

Bastard never knew what hit him.

I can't believe how easily
I was duped by that girl.

Well, it just seems like the
heart is the most direct path

for these people to
worm their way into your life.

I want to find the woman
who set this all up.

- I want it so bad.
- I know.

I know you do, Landon,
but trust me.

Just be glad that
you got out of this alive.

We have to understand
and accept

that there are different kinds
of human nature.

There will always be bad people

taking advantage of good people.

Oh, hi! Come on in.
I'll be with you in a sec.

Hi.

All we can do
is hope that one day,

she gets what's coming to her.