Mommy Is at the Hairdresser's (2008) - full transcript

No more pencils, no more books,

No more teacher's dirty looks!

No more pencils, no more books,

No more teacher's
dirty looks!

MOMMY IS AT THE HAIRDRESSER'S

Elise, your brother wet his pants.

Don't worry, we're almost home.

Enjoy your summer, kids!

Say hi to your moms

Happy vacation!

Quiet, Jewel!



Hi, Mrs Corbeil

Hello, children!

My pants are all wet.

"Hundreds of thousands
of US troops will cross

"the Pacific Ocean to fight

"in the jungle
and rice paddies. "

I could write, "This marks a new
escalation in the undeclared war

"waged by the US and
their South Vietnamese allies "

Good, I'll talk to you next week.

Hi, bunny

Hi, Mom

Hold it! Just a second

Your pants are on backwards again.

What did I tell you?



The zipper goes in frontl

- I forgot.
- That's OK.

Go on. One foot.

Two feet.

You made a drawing?

- Thank you.
- She's the queen?

No, Mom. It's you.

Me?

Show me.

It's beautiful.

I'm hungry.
What's to eat?

It's summer so I made
your favourite.

Angel cake.
Elise, put on your shoes!

Goodbye, Mr Plumeau
Thanks, see you!

Who was it, Bobino?

Hi, kids!

I thought it was a customer.

- But it was Mr Plumeau!
- Mr Plumeau?

Yes, look out the window.

Why didn't you come?

What's that?

A go-kart.

With a two-stroke motor?

- Like you're an expert?
- I am too!

What a know-it-all!

My uncle's a mechanic.
And mechanics is hereditary.

Bernie, you're full of it.

I am not. The Martineaus,

we have gas in our veins,
not blood.

- Look at this.
- Where'd you get it?

You stole money?

Who said I stole it?

Catch, Tracto!

What'll you do with $10?

- Money buys everything.
- Buy red gas!

-And bum your motor?
-You could buy the new Beatles 45.

She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah!

Hi, guys.

Hi, Rom.

- I have a flat.
- Come on in.

Stay away from the river!

I used to go wandering
along the mountain track

I love to sing,
my knapsack on my back

Hi

I baked a cake.

My favourite!

It looks delicious.

Go get changed, Coco.

Wonderful.

He scares me.

Don't be a baby.
You wanted to come.

- I'm not a baby.
-Then let's go.

They're magnificient.
Little gems.

They look like real insects.

Perfect imitations.

No fish anywhere would suspect.

I'll take the Dark Montreal.

Yes, one.

And three salmon streamers. Three.

Three lake salmon streamers.

How much?

How much?

$5. It's a steal.

He's a grumpy SOB,
but he makes beautiful flies.

I want to learn to fish this summer.

In that case, let a fisherman
give you an advice.

If you want 'em to bite,
you need faith.

Otherwise you'll never
catch a thing!

Faith in what?

That's for you to discover.

Coming?

Faith!

I caught one!

Attack!

What are you doing?

I said not past your ankles.

Bye, Dad

Tractor, Bernard!

Look what we found
for Coco in my dad's barn.

Can I get on?

Grab it here.

Mr Fly's back for the summer.

Don't let him hear you.

He's deaf.

Slow down!
I told you, he's crazy.

Hold tight, Benoit.

Why's Mr Fly's cheeck
dirty like that?

The sign of the devil!

It's not the devil,
it's coagulated blood.

Put on your shoes.

See you later?

Call me.

My lawnmower!

You said it was broken.

I'd have had it fixed.

Romeo, how's your mom?

Still the same.

Guess I'll have to buy
a new lawnmower.

For your go-kart.

What is it?

It's from my tractor.

Will you tell me how it ends?

You'll never learn
to read like that.

Elise is right.
Practice makes perfect!

Maybe he needs glasses.

Leave him alone.
He's going at his own speed.

When I was 6, I could read Tintin.

I was here.

You see? In Afghanistan.

The cholera epidemic

is so virulent,
it's spread to Iran and Iraq.

A nasty business.

I'll never be like you,

a specialist in tropical diseases,

studying people's shit all day
to find disgusting parasites.

What's studying shit

to find disgusting parasites?

It's microbiology.

I'm going to be a truck driver.

Or a singer like the Beatles.

I'm never growing up.

What are 7 league boots?

They're boots that can take
you to the end of the world.

See you.

"They fit his feet and legs
as perfectly as if..."

OK, kids.
Bedtime.

No fair, I go to bed after him.

Good night.

- Will you sing me a song?
- Just one.

- I'm going to the hospital.
- Are you on call?

It's the summer schedule.

You haven't practised piano.
Play a little now before bed.

Stop, piano's important.

Move over.

What would you like me to sing?

The Country Life, Margot,

Beautiful Francoise,
It Scares the Birds...

Beautiful Francoise.

Thanks, Grandma.

What a lovely roast beef!

Can't we eat like everyone?

That looks like cattle feet.

Brown rice still has
all its nutrients.

White rice has nothing.
It's unhealthy. Enjoy!

700 million Chinese eat white rice
and they're not all sick.

But their skin is yellow.

- Stop fooling around!
- It's ok, bunny.

For wine stains,
nothing beats salt.

Why doesn't Mr Fly
put salt on his stain?

Elise, I told you.

Stay away from the river.

Remember Guillaume who drowned?

You've stold us that story
100 times.

And I wont stop!

Mr Fly...

He hates children.
I hear he even cooks them.

He cooks children?

Leave the poor man in peace.

1:00. I have to go.

- Where?
- My golf tournament.

Didn't I tell you?
A fundraiser.

Can I work as your caddy?

You're too young.

Let him earn some money.

What's he need money for?
At his age?

I have to buy some bolts.

Mommy, I'm full.

Three more bites.

Frogs don't eat cereal.

What do they eat?

They eat maggots, stuff like that.

What's a maggot?

Maggots are...

maggots.

Why are you sad?

My mom's sick again.

You can't imagine,
having a mom with migraines.

I'm not allowed to breathe.

What are migraines?

They're like...

a hammer pounding on your head
non-stop.

There you go, missy.

Thanks.

When's the pool man coming?

I have to call him.

That tickles!

It tickles!

Mommy?

What's a maggot?

A maggot?

It's somone who has no backbone,
who lacks all dignity.

Mommy, I saw the flag was up.

Thanks, bunny.

Come have lunch.

What about our holidays?

I thought about Tortoise Island.

Any tortoise?

Go to Haiti, with the kids?

We can stay
at Dr. Campeau's dispensary.

That's your idea of a holiday,
a leper colony?

Travel broadens you, right kids?

What's a leper?

A contagious disease.

Why not Cape Cod?

Over my dead body.

Parasols, ice boxes, water wings,
suntan lotion, Noxzema,

picking sand out of your sandwich,

swimsuits, sleeping bags...

No, thank you.

Plus the icy water

with seaweed and jellyfish.

Who wants lemonade?

What's jellyfish?

I never realized.
she hated camping so much.

Mommy, what's a jellyfish?

It's like floating jello.

Coco, not with your mouth full.

In English it's a jellyfish.

It's a marine animal.

A cnidarian, to be precise.
Get me the dictionary.

I knew it!

I have some big news!

Elise is going to
boarding school next fall.

I'm not going to boarding school!

You're not going here.

We talked about it.

It's a fine school.
You can keep up your piano.

You'll come home on weekend.
You'll love it.

Dad, you can't let her force me!

It's reactonary.
And with the educational reform...

Please, stay out of this.

It'll ensure
you get into university.

You yourself said those nuns
smell like cat piss!

They may smell bad,
but they can teach.

Anyway, the matter is closed.

May I leave, too?

Sure, go ahead.

Here, cnidarian.

"Radially symmetrical marine animal,
6 or 6 main classes.

"Digestion via stomach push.

"Possessing cells
that can sting or kill."

Want to play with me?

Mom's sending me to a school
run by stinky nuns.

Poor you! You should pull a fit
like my sister Anna.

Then dad gives her whatever
she wants.

What does she do?

Why don't you try that, too?

With me, it won't help.

Dad doesn't care.
I'm not his son.

I'm skinny, he's fat.

I'm the son of an Austrian prince.
Mom told me.

Screw boarding school!

Are you there?

I'm over here.

What's up, bunny?

Does boarding school hurt?

No, it doesn't hurt.

It's true you sometimes
feel homesick.

But you learn not to.

Stop, you didn't!
You really said that?

What are you doing?
You see I'm on the phone!

Shut the door, please.

Why did you do that?

Hello, could you watch the girls
for two hours?

I'm off to SOS Somalia
with books and pencils.

You look ill.

Education's the key.
Even Blacks deserve schools.

Despite our prejudices.

While I'm at it,

I have a petition here
opposing clotheslines.

We can't let our lovely bungalows
be sullied.

by badly bleached unmentionables!

This isn't Italy!

Do you aggree?

I don't give a damn
about clotheslines.

You can pick up the girls later.

The nerve!

Do you want to skip rope?

What's wrong with you?

She threw the coffee at your dad?

That's how he takes it.

Let's go.

Jelly in the bowl! Jelly in the...

What are you waiting for?

Jelly in the bowl! Jelly in the...

You're such pests!

Wiggle waggle, wiggle waggle
Jelly in the bowl!

Sausage in the pan

I'm not playing.

-What's with her now?
-I don't know.

Mom?

It's Sunday, it's not garbage day.

What's wrong?

Did your chain jump?

Don't worry. I can fix it.

Romeo?

Come help me.

I gotta go.

What are you doing
with Dad's stuff?

Throwing it out.

He'll leave the hospital.
He'll get better.

No.

He won't get better.

Come on...

You'll be OK.

Did you see Barnard?

He was going to help me
with the hay.

He went to Mass with his parents.

Mom says
the church keeps us in the dark.

Don't you have electricity?

Chocolate, please.

I want the London posting.

I can leave in a week.

The meeting is over.

Simone, please stay.

Jacques, close the door.

What's going on, Simone?

If I don't leave, I'll die.

I'll prepare your contract.

Thank you.

Choose Steve McQueen.

Josée?

Marlon Brando.

Louise?

- James Dean.
- That's me.

Ok, we're on for 15 minutes.

I don't need your consent.

I can't refuse this offer. I'm a
journalist, not just an ornament.

What are you thinking? London?

It's ridiculous. The kids
can't be without their mother.

And Benoit?
He's already retarded.

I forbid you to say that.
He's perfectly normal.

He's slow, if you prefer.

You can't raise him from there.

They can come join me later.

Forget it.
We're not moving to London!

I didn't include you.

What's got into you?

There's something I'm missing.

When was the last time
we made love?

Do you remember?

-What do you mean?
-Stop it!

Stop pretending.
You know what I mean.

This is ridiculous.

I'm talking about your golf mates.

You reproach me for playing golf?

That's exactly it.

- Stop it!
- Leave me alone!

Let go, you're hurting me!

Shit.

Simone!

Come out.

Stop, Simone!

I've been searching for you.

You know Princess Sissi,

Elisabeth of Wittelsbach?

The Austrian empress
who was assassinated?

She had a son with Franz Joseph I.

I figure I'm a direct descendant.

You know the film,
The Sound or Music?

Did you notice the resemblance?

The youngest son
of the Trapp family.

I'm sure I'm him.

I mean, it's possible that...

Let's go!

I'm the son of an Austrian prince!

It's mom!

When are you coming home?

When's not just yet?

Where are you?

Where's London?

Where's Europe?

Is it far?

Where's my sweatshirt
with the zipper?

No, it's not in my top drawer.

OK, I love you too. Bye.

Elise, Mom's on the phone.

I'm not here.

Yes, it's me.

No, they're fine, just great.

You can't do this to us.

Can you listen to me for one second?

Can you listen to me
for a second, pl--

Hello?

Benoit, it's OK.
I'm here.

When you miss Mom,

just close your eyes.

You'll see her at the piano.

You'll hear Beethoven in your head.

I don't see anything.
It's all dark in my head.

Try again.

Hello, Grandma.

Yes, everything's fine.

He can't talk right now.
He's sleeping, he has a cold.

Sure you can get a cold in summer.

I'll tell him to call you, OK?

I have to go, my toast's burning.

I'm warning you, Jean.
Keep out of it!

Take the dog inside.

But Daddy,

they're too little
to go to the pet shop!

Stop your whining!

Move it!

Daddy, no!

Move away!

Come witness the fantastic launch
of the super go-kart!

Super go-kart?

- Ready?
- Sure.

Take it away!

You can do it!

Go on!

Wait.

Not so hot.

Bummer!

Some launch!

I told you a two-stroke motor
wouldn't work.

The problem's the alternator.

Lawnmowers don't have alternators.

One day, Bem,

someone's gonna smack you good

What for?

I want to fish.

I got a nibble!

Hello, Mr Lanthier.

Hi, Elise.

Can you get rid of these?

A two-storey bus!

Give me that.

Hel...

lo...

Look what I caught.

Mom says stay away from the river.

I don't care about Mom.
I do what I want.

She abandoned us.

She didn't abandon us.

If there were water in the pool
we could swim.

Elise, don't start.

Your mom's not here
to watch over Benoit.

Aren't we going to Dairy Queen?

What are you doing?
We don't break toys!

You could have hurt yourself.

What'll I do with him?

Aren't we going to Dairy Queen?

Anybody home?

Hello, Mom.

What's all this?

Hi, Grandma.

Hi, Conrad, sweetie.

When did you start smoking?

What are you doing here?

I know it's Sunday.

I'm with the residents
in favour of clotheslines.

Is your mother home?

She's at the hairdresser's.

I'll come back later.
Goodbye, kids.

Will someone explain?

She left.

Good Lord!

It can't be.

The first thing to do is...

find a housekeeper.

Easier said than done.

Never!

The spitting image of her mom.

We're managing.

Besides, I'll be on holiday soon.

Dad didn't dare slap me
when I said

that Mom had slept
with an Austrian prince.

He said he'd never hit a child.

But he uses bad words.

Words can hurt more than
a good slap to the face.

When I answered,

"So why are you fat
when I'm skinny?"

he turned all red
and grabbed me by the arm.

I thought I'd had it,
but just then Mom came back.

Play Nasty Words?

- Vater, grob.
- Housekeeper.

- Drachen, Weihnachten!
- Cat piss!

Isn't it a nice day
for a picnic on the mountain?

Well?

You can't slay cooped up
in the garage all summer.

I like it in the garage.

Young man, young man,
do you know how to play?

Do you know how to play
this violin?

I feel sick.

Dad, Benoit's sick.

Hold on, we're almost there.

- He's going to throw up.
- He won't.

No, shit!

Not in my panama, Benoit!

Isn't it beautiful?

Dad, can I ask you something?

Sure, what?

Did Mom leave because of me?

No, it's not your fault.

You're not to blame, Elise.

Then why did mom leave?

And don't answer with a proverb.

I didn't make her happy.

What's wrong?

Nothing.

Don't lie.
I heard you crying.

I wasn't, idiot.
I have a cold.

You can't catch a cold in summer.

Yes you can.

That's gross.

It's not gross.
I'm cleaning it.

We don't fish for fun,
like your town folks.

We fish 'cause
we have nothing else to eat.

Know what we do with our worries?

We take them and
throw them in the river.

Then they're gone, good riddance!

How big is your worry?

Like that.

That rock can't be budged.

You always have to exaggerate.

You can't just have a normal worry.

It's OK, she'll be better now.

But you have to let her rest, OK?

It's hard for her
since your dad got sick.

It's not easy for you, either.

Remember, the grass is always
greener on the other side.

Don't shout!

I hate clowns.

It's dark here.

Don't, I'm not allowed
to open them.

- Close your eyes.
- I don't want to close my eyes.

Then leave them open.

Relax, you're all stiff.

Let's try again.

What's wrong?

What do you think?
I've got a hard-on!

Before that summer,

I thought eveyone was happy.

But behind the smiles

lay so many sorrows and secrets.

Nothing had changed around me,

the forbidden river,

the cornfields,

the mountain,
the cracked asphalt...

My landmarks, Mom.

Heat up the macaroni for lunch.

I found a housekeeper for the fall.

We don't need a housekeeper!

Your go-kart's nice.

- Come help!
- Why?

It's my Mom.

She fainted in the shower.

It's all her medicine.

I don't want to see my mom naked.

Can you put on her bathrobe?

If you say my mom's weird,

I say your mom's gone.

I swear.

Spit on it.

Not in your house.

I'll let you see my aunt naked
for a buck.

Too much!
This isn't Montreal.

She's not Brigitte Bardot.

It's not much.

This is all I have.

$20
What if your dad sees you?

Dad never sees me.

I don't have money.

I'll pay for him.

Can I owe you?

Free for girls.

No fair!
I'm the only one who paid.

Can we see her naked now?

Yeah, come on.

What if she needs some clothes?

It's my uncles closet.

I can't manage on Albert's pension.

A dead man's clothes?

Nice doggie!

Sorry, Jewel.
It won't take long.

Jean, it's your dad!

Keep quiet, Bernie.

Well, your dad-

Shut up, understand?

Jean!

I told you!

What are you doing?
You crazy?

I'm looking.

Looking for what?

For why Mom left.

In a golf bag?

What are you doing?

Nothing. He has a migraine.

Give me that.

No cookies before supper.

Alright!

What's this book about?

An unhappy boy
who learns how hard life is.

Myself, I'd never write about
unhappy kids.

It's too banal.

"Myself". Such grammar!

Be careful, Benoit.

Go get changed.

Put on your PJs.

It was an accident.

He has a coordination problem.
It's his motor development.

What are you saying?
Benoit's motor is fine.

It's me with the motor problems.
I need spark plugs.

We can't keep Benoit here
without your mother.

He needs supervision.

I asked a psychiatrist friend
for advice.

There's a school
where he'll get help.

You're putting him in an asylum?

I didn't say an asylum.

I'm talking about a school.

That's ridiculous.

Thanks, Dad!

You can't knock over your glass.

Is Daddy sending me to an asylum?

No, that's for crazy people.

Maybe I'm crazy.

No, you're not crazy.

You're just different.

What's different?

Well, for example... Bernard.

His hair's carrot-red.

He's different.

My hair's not carrot-red.

Well, like Mr Fly...

He has a birthmark on his face.
He's different.

You're different inside your head.

If it's inside my head,
then no one can see it.

That's right, no one can see.

Are my girls here?
I can't find them.

I haven't seen them.

Where's your mom?

At the hairdresser's.

What's that noise?

I don't know.

What's he doing?

It's not a toy, it's dangerous.

Stop it!

He's crazy!

I always said that boy was strange.

Can't you behave like other people?

I've searched for an hour!

What are you doing?
Come here right now!

Voyeur!

Come, Elise!

- You're not my mother.
- You don't have one.

What's taking so long?

It's alright, they're specialists.

What kind of specialists?

Specialists for children.

Specialists, my ass!

What kind of language is that?

Go sit with your sister.

What did the specialists say?

He's gifted and dyslexic
with personality disorders.

A whiz kid who mixes his Bs and Ps.

Bravo, who'd have thunk it?

What'll they do now?

It's more complicated than that.

There's a program that's opened,
inspired by Dr. Bettelheim.

He's a leading expert
on infantile problems.

Where's this infantile program?

In Sherbrooke.

Sherbrooke?
That's three hours away!

I don't care about the world,
when Frederic

reminds me of our loves
when we were 20,

our woes, our home

not to forget

our best friends,

today dispersed

to the four winds

We were neither poets

nor priests, nor geniuses,
but Dad loved us anyway...

Look at this year's corn!
It's perfect!

Lovely pale yellow kernels...

Where's Benoit?
It'll be cold.

Benoit, come eat!

Plus, it's healthy.

If you have your health,
you have everything.

Not everything, just your health.

Conrad, sweetie,
pass me the butter.

Why do you always call him that?

Well, it was your father's name.

And if you hadn't insisted,
we'd have chosen differently

Mom will come back.

Mom will come back.

What is it, Elise?

Bring our Mom back!

Bring our Mom back!

OK, go ahead.

C'mon, quick!

He can't, it's too long.

Quiet, let him concentrate.

Stop!

Benoit, no!

Don't do it!

Hurry, Jean!

Benoit, get out of there!

I don't understand.

The garage almost burnt down!
What were you thinking?

Haven't I told you to watch him?

You stay out of the garage!

No more go-kart!

Where's Elise?

No, she's not here.

I were you,
I'd keep an eye on her.

She went off with Mr Fly.

That reprehensible man.

I have two daughters,
and I don't intend to let them...

Pass me your wife.

Thanks anyway.

I'll fetch Elise.
You stay here.

Real nice work.

But I can't give you more than...
$1,50 each.

His gems are worth more.

$1,50.

Here in London, DeGaulle's speech
drew varied reactions.

On his visit
to the Cambodian capital

France's president spoke

in the stadium inaugurated
by Prince Sihanouk

and openly criticized
the involvement

of the US in Vietnam.

The general asked the
United States...

...on ways to end the war.

Simone Gauvin for Radio-Canada
in London.

What's wrong with her?

Don't cry, dear.

I was worried to death.

Do you realize what time it is?

You won't spend all the summer
in the garage. Now go to bed.

He smashed the TV set
with a hammer.

Will you buy a new one?

Yes, of course I will.

On the river bank, I fell asleep

dreaming of heaven and earth

I was five and he was six

We rode on horses made of sticks

He wore black and I wore white

He would always win the fight

Bang bang, he shot me down

Bang bang, I hit the ground

Bang bang, that awful sound

Bang bang, my baby shot me down

My darling kids,

It rains a lot here.

In London the sky is always grey.

I'm looking for a big appartment
so you can come stay with me.

Every morning the minute
I open my eyes, I think of you.

Your loving Mom.

It's not fair. I was supposed
to go to boarding school.

Come on, Benoit!

Elise, don't!

Where will we go?

We're going to London.

Subtitles: Robert Gray, Kinograph

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