Micmacs (2009) - full transcript
Avid movie-watcher and video store clerk Bazil has had his life all but ruined by weapons of war. His father was killed by a landmine in Morocco and one fateful night a stray bullet from a nearby shootout embeds itself in his skull, leaving him on the verge of instantaneous death. Losing his job and his home, Bazil wanders the streets until he meets Slammer, a pardoned convict who introduces him to a band of eccentric junkyard dealers including Calculator, a math expert and statistician, Buster, a record-holder in human cannonball feats, Tiny Pete, an artistic craftsman of automatons, and Elastic Girl, a sassy contortionist. When chance reveals to Bazil the two weapons manufacturers responsible for building the instruments of his destruction, he constructs a complex scheme for revenge that his newfound family is all too happy to help set in motion.
Hello?
Good morning, is your mother in?
Are you ready?
I must go now.
Jesus, the son of God ...
...descended on earth
and suffered ...
...to pay for our sins.
You're in danger.
I do not care,
As long as I am near you.
I never thanked you for your help.
It was brave, very courageous.
I've never seen you
so beautiful.
I think
I am in love with you.
You'll come with me to the police?
No.
Why?
I killed Charles Ringan.
Would you tell the Commissioner?
Yes, if you ask it
I don't want to.
Listen, I'm very tired.
I feel quite stiff.
I killed a man and I witnessed
the murder of a poor soul.
It's all because Geiger
sang Carmen.
If I told, your home
would be invaded by police ...
... before you'd have time to flee.
Perhaps she'll recover. I've seen it in the past.
We'll let your father know about Ringan.
You forgot something.
Me?
What do you have?
Nothing you can't heal
If I extract the bullet,
he'll be a vegetable.
If I don't, he'll be living on
the knife's edge.
Better to be alive
at the risk of dying ...
...then to be dead.
This is closer to philosophy
than medicine.
Heads or Tails?
Heads!
OK, I'll leave it. It'll ring the
alarms at airports!
They changed the lock.
What happened, did you comb hair
with a can opener?
Where's my stuff?
It was in the cellar.
But you know people...
After 3 days, there was not more
than odd socks left
That's my hat.
Hey ...
My little Bazil ...
For you, fell off the back of a truck.
100% cotton.
You got a job
you'll find a home.
Good morning.
Is Serge in?
Well! If it isn't Bazil!
You've come back!
I almost didn't.
I hope they took the lead
from your head.
I'm back, faithful to the position.
But the position was not
faithful to you.
I had to replace you.
This is Lola.
Three-month trial.
We just signed a permanent contract.
Ah ...
Well, we haven't kissed.
Mr. Bazil!
Don't listen to him.
In fact, I have a boyfriend.
His name is Ricardo.
He picks me up every night
on his motorcycle.
He always parks there.
Where you were shot.
One day, while riding...
We heard a small noise,
like a pebble stuck in the tire.
Mr. Bazil, it was not a pebble.
Which hand?
Make an effort.
She puts her head under her feet
and her toes in the nose
And then does the splits.
She spins and
coils like a caterpillar.
Suddenly, her legs around his neck
She spins, like a ball
and nibbles his knees.
The rubber woman.
With her, what fun they can
have. Ah, it's crazy.
It's enough to make you
go funny in the head.
They search below and they
find it underneath.
The rubber woman.
Thank you ...
You got five minutes?
I spent my life in jail.
So they call me "Closet".
I'm Bazil.
I know.
You're a sweet in a jar.
You've been on the streets for 2 months,
but you've not submerged, you have a
purpose. What is it?
I live day to day.
With the bullet,
that could make me trip out anytime.
Me, the widow maker gave me
this injury.
The guillotine in '59.
The guillotine jammed.
It happened twice.
I was pardoned.
Get that bullet out of your head.
Impossible.
The surgeon said ...
Because ...
You follow me.
A family will adopt you.
Hi.
Hi!
That's Max.
Here we're home.
We share our home.
This is our little goose of the Capitol.
If the robber is pointing ...
Whistle blasts
Ha! Ha!
Go, go, my little guy.
Come in, don't be shy.
Wakey
Come, let me introduce...
For recruitment,
it is she who decides.
You collect stray bullets?
Yes, ma'am.
Say!
I'm Tambouille.
Here stuff is recovered,
we sort and repair it.
Everybody together.
Even little Pierre.
And, he's an artist.
He brings anything we can use.
59...
42 ...
104!
Nickel.
She's called "Calculator".
Father and mother unknown.
He has a compass in his eye.
The white man
a compass in the eye
...starvation
begins at the top...
...and goes from cock to the ass.
Yes!
"The compass in the eye".
Note.
He was a writer in Brazil.
Fracasso is my name.
I have carbon staples...
...in my throat.
He lost a lung in a water bottle
explosion.
and also have a cycle Dynamo
in my stomach ...
...and 3 neck joints
of titanium.
Well, go ahead, tap away.
Go ahead, it's titanium!
Go!
Go ahead!
Oh!
He dreams of getting his name
in the Guinness Book of Records.
I already did in 77!
212 meters: Record of the human cannonball.
We never saw
the certificate.
I was robbed!
I've told you already.
Hey, you!
Why do you get him upset?
Now that you belong to the
Family ...
...get me
a small pot of cream in the fridge.
Further down, boy!
Aaaahh!
You want my picture?
She's a little snappish...
...but she's always the first
to bend for for others.
You're a contortionist?
No, I am the vegetable crisper.
She was like that from birth...
At 5, she already was hiding
in the pantry.
And he remained so long
the closet ...
...without laces in his shoes
that he's forgot how to tie them!
Come!
Come to the table, the mash is ready.
Speaking a Flemish dialect.
Can I help you?
Yes, I would like to see
Mr. De Fenouillet.
Of course,
you have an appointment?
That is to say,
I have something in mind.
It concerns him.
If this is a project or idea,
send an email.
I could send him a scan,
but I prefer to see him.
You'll have to leave.
Yes. Warning!
Warning!
Warning! Warning!
Boo!
Show this clown to the street,
that's all.
A bullet in the head?
At least he'll remember us!
Guys, I need someone here!
Go!
You know
we're leaders ...
... in the field of
cluster munitions.
We have quadrupled our sales
in the Gulf ...
... decreased by 7 to 9%
on collateral damage.
As you know,
we're not monsters.
We don't want anyone's death.
We all know very well ...
... a wounded soldier is more expensive
than a dead soldier!
Our CBS-87
disperses 202 projectiles ...
... and cleans the equivalent
of 4 football fields.
We have been present
in the Gulf, Kosovo. ..
... in Afghanistan ...
In short, it is time to call ...
... to this forum
the architect of our success.
Our CEO:
François Marconi!
Thank you, thank you.
Thank you all.
Tracers ...
... explosive or bullets ...
... ours are the best ...
... the most aggressive and powerful.
Rimbaud began as a poet
Finally as an arms dealer.
Well, I...
I'll do the opposite.
But until retirement ...
... I will continue to rhyme
ambition with ammunition...
... Living with dynamite.
Love live Vigilatne Armament!
Goodnight, Mr. President.
General...
Joseph, good night!
I remind you...
...of the new rule in force.
A landmine
was placed under the playing surface
Yes, it is a renewed challenge ...
...offered by the league.
The suspense was short-lived
as frontcenter ...
...the visiting team
just paid the price.
You were brilliant tonight.
- Thanks, George.
Arthur Rimbaud arms dealer,
in history?
Yes, but it didn't prevent him from dying
of gangrene, when they amputated of his leg.
Baudelaire, of syphilis?
Verlaine, delirium tremens ...
...Lorca was shot ...
...Nerval hanged himself from a
lamppost.
I will encourage my son to
become a poet, sir.
Tomorrow,
wake me up at 10am
Yes, sir.
You've worked for us
long?
30 years next month.
Ah ...
Why don't we...
...upgrade this place for your 30 years?
With some high-tech equipment.
The old pots make the best soups.
Hum ...
Change is coming.
At least once
every 30 years.
Why can't he sleep at the foot
of the bed?
Stop moaning!
Birds of a feather flock together.
Hey, Grandma?
Croutons!
Cello and musical saw
...
The day went well?
Yes, papa.
I was brilliant tonight.
My speech was fantastic.
I was compared to Rimbaud.
You know who he is?
Yes, but you're not that muscula.
No, not "Rambo", darling, "Rimbaud."
Put him to bed.
Yes, sir.
Hello? Yes.
No, wait ...
How did you get this number?
Yes, I see.
No, this kind of transaction,
not over the phone.
No! No more ...
I prefer a public place.
I know ... Say Wednesday ...
... 3pm, the sports dept. of
Galeries Lafayette.
Yes, that's it.
Waffles ...
...d'Brussels!
Cries of joy
Do not eat too much,
I put the rum in the batter.
Hey, stop!
Speaking in Flemish dialect
She speaks Chinese
Hurry, the minots!
They'll be ready soon!
Mr. Fracasse...
Isn't this you, here
in the Guinness Book of Records?
Yikes!
The 77!
What did I tell you!
What I tell you ...
Ha! Ha!
"On July 14, 1977,
Theodore Henri de Montreuil"...
Who is Theodore Henry?
..."beat by 9 meters ...
..."the record of human-cannonball
prepared by Mr. grampee on 66" Ha!
"Beat by 9 meters"!
Yes!
You'll give it to me, kid.
Oh no.
Ah yes, please, if you give me.
But no.
If you give me.
You sign my t-shirt, then.
"T. Henri" ...
Thierry Henry.
Fracasso, I have a job for you.
I'm not joking...
...but I think
there's a catch.
You've got an idea
in that head?
Mister poses a mystery.
Well, who cares, you're not curious.
Oh ... Oh!
What time?
Tomorrow, 10am,
opposite the tomb of Sacha Guitry.
Mr. Marconi?
I am the messenger of
Omar Boulounga.
Omar Boulounga ...
The former dictator ...?
The former and the next.
He's preparing a revolution.
I don't have a polical view.
We require rifles,
grenades and mines.
And the DGA, the Export Committee
the Ottawa Treaty?
You have all the weapons
In stock.
You don't have an export sector
in Zamibia.
We'd like one.
And this should interest me?
Check us out.
We'll give you double the cash and
more in diamonds if we succeed.
Continue.
Mr. Boulounga's national account...
...the diamond mines.
Don't sneeze!
Think of something, fast!
Zebras are white with black stripes
or black with white stripes?
Oh, pygmies!
Are there dwarves among pygmies?
Why we say "CIA"
and not "ifeow"?
Or "f-bi-ouch" and not "FBI?
Think ...
...but do not delay too much,
we returned to Conakry Monday.
You!
Yes, you!
I do not know what your shenanigans
are about...
...but either you go and continue
doing everything alone ...
...or you stay
and ask us for help.
Am I clear?
Some of them want to help me?
What?
I found the manufacturer of the bullet
and the mine that killed my father.
I need to do two things at once
I can't do it alone.
Stick together ...
They're the watchmen.
Inside is the dealer.
The drug's hidden in the mailbox.
That way, if they're ever searched...
...they are white as snow.
Let's go!
You've already done it for the crash
and whiplash at the same time?
You're old school.
Yes?
Asbestos Control.
A problem was reported.
But there's no asbestos here!
We didn't find asbestos in the
devil vauvert.
From the crack of dawn ...
...we dealt with that problem.
So no need to rock the boat.
Ah!
Oh! But ...
The widow told me she'd
never leave.
Wherever I go, it's on my back.
Hats off!
And my receipt?
The more one drinks,
more one is right!
The boarding hall, please?
My brother, you want a magical necklace?
Get you into heaven.
The powder wards off evil spirits.
But yes! Ha! Ha!
Ah, you're the boss?
Commander!
Here!
It will protect you against the
devil ...
...and the vagaries of fate.
Incense that will allow you
contact the deceased.
Let the passengers be!
I've told you 100 times!
This is your last warning. Get away!
Sorry, gentlemen.
Wishing you a safe journey.
Sorry, if you please,
sir.
Hello.
We're seeking the plane to America.
The departure hall?
Yes, we go to Manhattan
to visit ...
...my son.
You must register your baggage before.
It's half-sister...
...my son who left in 1989
for New York.
New York ...
You're talking to me?
In 1988.
On December 12, 1988.
Last call for Conakry.
Lufthansa Flight 202.
The vertebra of Tino Rossi.
Winston Churchill's
Fingernail clippings.
The molar Marilyn ...
Monroe.
The foot of Salma Lazarus.
Heart of Louis XVI.
The finger of Matisse.
The eye of Mussolini ...
Sniff, ringing
Nothing doing.
It is expected that the DGA launched
the study and called the Saudis.
Yes, it was more an individual effort
than group... rather well done.
Well, they will not provide the
source code.
If it works?
Remember the Sarajevo market.
The collateral damage added value
in the media.
But of course ...
That's why it kills me to say.
You and me, we work ...
...in the defense industry ...
...not in the attack industry.
I beg you, dear friend.
You are always welcome.
My respects to madame.
I'm already 10 minutes late,
hurry!
What was that, Maurice?
"Stephen", sir.
Stephen, yes!
We have a flat, I think.
Sorry, I'll check.
Peasant.
Hello.
I have a reservation
in the name of De Fenouillet.
Yes.
You are expected.
I am the right hand of
Mr. De Fenouillet.
He asked me to tell you that the
eye of Mussolini interests him.
In exchange for Achilles hell and
Adam's apple of...
1, 2, 3 ... test.
1, 2, 3 ... test.
I am the messenger of Omar Boulounga.
Go ahead, make me an offer.
Do not put the cart before
the horse. It will save us...
...from having 2 feet
in the same hoof.
If you have the eye of Mussolini...
...I'll give you the molar of Marilyn.
It's worth it.
I've got the finger of Matisse
and fingernails of Churchill ...
...name the price.
What say you, Mr. Lazarus?
Mr. Lazarus had a setback,
he had to leave.
Unfortunately,
Mr. Lazarus had to stand you up.
He returned to his household.
Who are you?
I am the messenger of Omar Boulounga.
Boulounga?
I thought ...
We were done?
Nay.
A popular revolution...
A popular revolution.
Omar will return where
Omar belongs.
I'm not interested in politics.
It doesn't bring you bread.
Double the cash...
...plus more diamonds ...
...if the usurper ...
...takes to his heels
and Boulounga back to the pinnacle.
When, how and where?
Tuesday the 27th, one of your men.
Just one...
Will be at the station at
2:45 with the samples.
He'll buy a ticket for
Crecy-la-Chapelle and leave...
...with a deposit ...
...of 30% cash ...
...dollars and cents.
Well?
The operator's transferring me.
Marconi?
Omar Boulounga in person.
So you thought?
Ha! Ha!
Congratulations, you're now looking
at noon to 2pm.
I did not invent sliced bread...
...but I don't mistake candles
for lanterns.
Well, I want one man
present...
with samples at the
Gare de l'Est tomorrow at 2:45.
He'll get a ticket
for La Ferte-Milon.
He will leave with 1st deposit
of the order. OK?
Right. OK!
Ready for more, guys?
Why "guys"?
Well, because there'll be action.
Ah! When there is action,
it's not for girls?
Preconception...
Uh ...
You're not a real...
Real what?
A real girl! Is that it?
I wouldn't not say that.
If that's it.
No.
Is it! Is that what you got wanted say.
No.
Did you mean I'm a tomboy?
That's right.
When I have to fold into a bag,
I'm in the club!
Ladies and gentlemen,
arms traffickers ...
... currently waiting
in this station.
Be vigilant.
Do not buy a landmine from
a dealer on the run.
You risk him using it.
Thank you for your attention.
Wow! What's that?
1kg 720 steel
350 grams of polycarbonate ...
...70 grams of kevlar.
And that's not a small Uzi is it?
It's a MAC 10
maybe even even 11.
No, no!
You step on it, you'll lose your foot!
Oh ...
Or your life, perhaps.
Ooh la la
That's for recycling! It's not for us.
I didn't recycle it,
it fell off the back of a tank!
Confiscated!
Thurs tomorrow, play naughty!
Or is Scarface
and his return to Chicago!
If it wasn't here...
Ready for Phase 2?
Strike the iron is hot!
Let's draw!
De Fenouillet, here's Boulounga.
Your Rights
did not appear!
The deal is obsolete. The Vigilante
Armament offered me better.
Make a cross on the diamond
and butter in the spinach.
Music worrying
He sighs.
...
Marconi Boulounga for Omar.
If you could do it
a bit more sober.
Marconi? Boulounga is pissed!
Your boy took to his heels.
The deal is dead and gone.
Aubervillers Armaments are
better customers. Goodbye!
Tambouille,
I have to go out between 1 and 2pm.
Your 2 sharks have taken the bait?
For now, they're biting.
I'm...
...just going to sweeten the pot!
But when it bites,
it will be well hooked..
It's big.
Then I...
Then 'We'
We'll turn the screws.
No, not until we see their faces.
Not gay, gay.
Guet!
Guards!
Yes. Oh well ...
I need volunteers to go on the
roof. Thank you, Calculator.
It's good to have people to
count on.
Good ...
Uh ... where are you going then?
Well, wherever you go.
Excuse me, but I must handle
a delicate matter.
I prefer to go alone.
Ah, I understand.
It is true that in matters
of delicacy ...
...and even subtlety ...
...you're an expert.
"The Diva of Porn,"
She will please you!
Something of a pencil sharpener!
Great, but do you won a nightgown.
I sleep naked.
Hey, Henry ...
...you spell Henri
Not with a Y but with an I.
Oh? Are you sure?
Thierry Henri?
Yeah.
It would be wrong, Thierry Henry?
Do not worry, I'm always game
for the cyclops sneeze.
Well, we'll do as you ask?
Yeah.
Soon.
This evening.
Well?
I thought...
...you're fishing for shark,
not cod or herring!
We're not married.
No, we're not married
Anyway,
perverts are not my thing.
Like me
with contortionists.
My mother always told me
to distrust the twisted.
I'm not twisted.
I am a sensitive soul
in a flexible body.
This is not the same.
Hello?
Listen to me.
You listen to me!
Camel!
I despise your shenanigans!
But the Boulounga diamonds
where you like!
Dickless!
I appears that the teeth, fingers ...
... the bones of the Assyrian kings,
the looting of the Baghdad museum?
If you want war,
think twice about ti!
When one is fortunate to have
divorced...
... to advantage, one doesn't
choose as as mistress...
...the wife of the Prime Minister.
I also have the recording at home.
Well, gotta say ...
...that Grandpa and Grandma
did it in the dark.
So doing it in front of everyone...
...is just a little more dramatic...
...a little more creative,
a little more flexible, right?
Bazil! Hey!
Boo!
Oh ...
Let's go.
And, I'm not too girly to act
the alley cat?
No, precisely why we needed a person...
Flexible!
We needed a person
like you, feline and female.
Oh dear ...
Marignan?
1515.
Nagasaki?
17 kilotons.
Kiss?
Hello, sir.
Something happened last night.
It's most unusual.
Sir!
Come on, Maurice.
"Stephen", sir.
I have a delivery
Mr. De Fenouillet.
You're out of luck,
he just left.
Leave it to me.
It's a bit heavy.
Ah ...
Go ahead.
There.
7 meters 50 centimeters,
4 millimeters.
The rubber woman
With her, you can go crazy.
She'll make you funny in the head.
It seeks the above
And is found below
The rubber woman.
Pip squeak.
You've washed your hands?
YES!
- Let's see.
Hey, you!
There is no laughing at the table.
She imitates.
Where are thee,
with thy merchants of death?
- They're hooked the more they struggle,
the more they're trapped.
Oh ... when I think
of those poor mothers ...
...who lose their children
because of mines.
You know Tambouille?
She had 2 little girls.
One evening at the Fair of the Throne ...
...they saw them enter
in the labyrinth.
She never saw them come out.
For years, she has searched
the streets.
Eventually, she became a tramp.
And after all that,
She adopted us.
Fifififi ...
Enough, you lowly masses.
What can you see my
little salty?
Fat: 62%, protein: 4% ...
OH!
Ben who?
A little salty is as it should be...
...a black belt
at Cordon Bleu.
Oh, surely not ...
Even if... oh no.
You got an idea for cooking
your 2 big fish?
Frying.
There's more to roll in flour.
In the flour!
Fracasso, no doubts?
No! He has no doubts.
Go! We will balance the Fracasse!
It blows.
Calculator!
Distance: 138 meters.
Wind Speed: 12 km / h
Direction: south/southwest.
There.
Weight of the projectile?
76 kilos.
Add 4.
It's Tambouille's fault.
OK ... say 80.
Why did you add more?
Slice: 70 grams.
Butter: 37 g. Jam ...
Okay, okay!
Come on, get ready.
Remington!
For the committee's approval!
Engine!
It's time to go.
No, it's too early. 59 ...
58 ...
...
57 ...
56 ...
55 seconds.
Oh!
Closet, well then?
What? It's recycled!
It's old...
Oh!
Closet!
You Bastard!
But it's recycled!
Fire!
Watch out!
Come on, move!
Watch out!
No batteries?!
How?!
It's recycled.
It's recycled?!
I broke the altitude record!
and I had proof!
One minute, butterfly!
What?
I devoted myself to the filming!
That's the last straw!
No Battery.
It's an unwritten law:
One key to the equipment.
It's going to explode.
It's her.
Code 5, no quarter.
You are Madame Cisse?
Yes.
Your husband had a problem.
What happened?
Your husband is ashamed:
He lost your residency permit.
Then I only have to request
a duplicate.
That's what I did
with Edward Mangin ...
...my friend the Prefect of Police.
But your record was not found.
But I assure you...
hmmm?
Who are you?
I'm part of the company
that employs your husband.
You see, our activities relate to...
...national defense ...
At the same time,
Obviously ...
we feel oblige to protect
children.
I can always try
put pressure on my friend Mangin
That's good,
I'm seeing him tomorrow evening.
I know,
you think what?
Show him.
In all arsenals,
they have the same machine.
You see where she is?
It's essential, it must be installed
with ...
...bulkhead opening on the outside..
...like that.
This has been done
to guide the air out ...
...in case of...
The technician will activate the machine
behind the door.
ideally we would be to proceed ...
...during lunch
when the machine is paused.
What should I do?
Almost nothing.
You unscrew the small tube
you slide the steel ball out ...
...and that's all.
Is this dangerous?
Returning to Somalia
is dangerous too.
I put it where I?
Ah!
Do not bother to
seek the dust underneath.
You have a moment?
It is forbidden to park here
with this load.
Don't worry, I'll be quick.
By God!
That's weird.
Usually, he warns me.
In the time of his father
you would not come.
There's nothing to sign?
No.
Thank you very much.
Bazil, this blackmail evidence,
What is it?
It may be a video ...
...tape, envelopes,
photos ...
It can be anything
and anywhere.
Thanks for the clarification.
From there, please.
That slab ...
We enter.
Where's the package?
I understand it was there.
The nanny had put it away.
No, your son is with his mother.
His mother ...
Ah yes, true.
Get me the package.
I assure you ...
I understand.
Oh, this will be sweet...
... this afternoon
Aubervilliers Arsenal ...
... doing extensive
damage.
No casualties were reported.
An investigation is underway
to determine the causes.
Recall that the CEO
Nicolas Thibault de Fenouillet ...
... has been sited in cases
of influence peddling.
... but he's not been replaced at
this time.
- I defy anyone to make ...
bullshit!
... no tangible evidence!
It is a scandal!
The information on LCI.
Calm, calm... Breath.
Practice:
The crucial issues.
Number 12: Who...
...invents jokes?
No. 27: Why the place we seek on
a map always in the fold?
No. 62: How much erosion is caused
by walking?
The CEO
Nicolas Thibault de Fenouillet ...
... has been cited in cases of
influence peddling...
... and has been fired.
- Ah! Bullshit!
... no tangible evidence!
Bullshit.
Ongoing information on LCI.
You want a war?
It will be the blitzkrieg!
- Sir, We have a go?
Go!
Go.
Go.
Go!
Ah! What now..
That's it then?
You thought
we would rot in prison?
You're impressed by our resolve?
- Exercise # 8: Money ...
Cash, money moola, wonga,
lucre, grease..
...dosh, pennies!
Yeah!
No!
Tut tut tut ... Hush.
Oh ...
Oh! No!
- I came to
give you a little lesson ...
...but these clown
gave me another idea.
Oh no ...
How?
You'd never take such a risk.
What risk?
You refused to sell arms to
rebels who were fomenting a coup.
They planted a bomb
in Arsenals
...before coming
to get you!
We rushed to your aid...
Isn't that so, Libarski?
We arrived a bit too late.
This is perfect.
Wait, wait ...
Ah!
I'll give you the tape
with evidence.
The teeth, fingers,
the looting of Baghdad Museum.
You take it and you leave.
It's not enough.
Oh, okay,
stop your bullshit!
OK,
I would not have sabotaged your plant.
But you stole my shells.
What shells?
Well ...
...the shell truck.
You stole a shell truck.
We did what?
No.
It wasn't us.
The truck, wasn't me.
It was probably them.
Yes, it must be them.
Him... it's him!
He was spotted in the video!
He was disguised as a server.
I thought it worked for you.
I thought he worked for you...
...dirty trick number 2.
What madness!
Who do you work for?
Er... I'm on my own.
I have a bachelor flat.
We'll question him there?
My car is outside.
It's not too early!
You're late.
The problem is over.
That's him.
Oh ...
Aeschylus died after ...
...a turtle hit his head.
Jean-Baptiste Lully,
died of gangrene.
Barbarossa, by forgetting to remove
his armor to cross a river.
And I'm dying stupidly too
feeling like a jerk.
Closet, Plan B.
Emergency!
Bridge of Crimea!
Everyone out!
Ha! Ha! Ha!
...
Come on, jump!
- 240, 230 ...
...220210 ...
... 200, 190, 180, 170 ...
... 160, 150 ...
... 130, 120 ...
... 110, 90, 70 ...
And .. and ... and ... now!
Drop the trash!
Slowly.
Oh shit...
It picks up garbage!
They're over us...
on the bridge!
The carrots are cooked,
you have drawn a blank.
Hope you enjoy the sun.
We're paying for your vacation in
North Africa.
Closet, good landing, thank you.
- Hey! Hey! It's ...
RECYCLED'!
Encore.
Encore!
You recognize this?
and you, recognize this?
Shhh! Tut tut tut ...
Don't move.
Don't move.
You want a ransom?!
Demand a price we can afford.
I am a friend ...
...with the President of the Republic.
Take away this grenade, it's ridiculous!
We'll call,
you'll see, he will pay.
Articulate, bitch!
What do you want?
Sorry, sorry ...
...for the children.
Ah yes ...
That's forgiveness.
Sorry for women ...
...who are raped
in the wars!
I sell weapons to people
who stop wars.
- You Bastard!
You still sell
Landmines!
I am for terrorism.
Me too.
The Boeing 300 died of Ankara ...
The explosive was ours!
You were using
I was providing ...
...ETA and the IRA.
- And on Darfur, where do you think
their explosives from?
You encouraged the market?
Kind of pathetic!
Video traffickers
Go to YouTube ...
...and type
"arms dealers caught".
Guys, come see.
Mr. Marconi, if you please!
The price of your shares
collapsed.
You may serve 15 years.
What's your defense?
Fenouillet dropped
by his former political friends ...
... by the President of the Republic
Himself ...
... is on the run
to an unknown location.
We expect one day to see the closing
of Arsenals of Aubervilliers.
As soon as the 2 merchants of death
hit the floor.
...Bazil, proud as Lucifer, beat
his breast and made amends ...
There was no need
to be a genius ...
...to understand that they would
with eyes of Chimène.
And it was no secret ...
They get along like a house on fire.
Good morning, is your mother in?
Are you ready?
I must go now.
Jesus, the son of God ...
...descended on earth
and suffered ...
...to pay for our sins.
You're in danger.
I do not care,
As long as I am near you.
I never thanked you for your help.
It was brave, very courageous.
I've never seen you
so beautiful.
I think
I am in love with you.
You'll come with me to the police?
No.
Why?
I killed Charles Ringan.
Would you tell the Commissioner?
Yes, if you ask it
I don't want to.
Listen, I'm very tired.
I feel quite stiff.
I killed a man and I witnessed
the murder of a poor soul.
It's all because Geiger
sang Carmen.
If I told, your home
would be invaded by police ...
... before you'd have time to flee.
Perhaps she'll recover. I've seen it in the past.
We'll let your father know about Ringan.
You forgot something.
Me?
What do you have?
Nothing you can't heal
If I extract the bullet,
he'll be a vegetable.
If I don't, he'll be living on
the knife's edge.
Better to be alive
at the risk of dying ...
...then to be dead.
This is closer to philosophy
than medicine.
Heads or Tails?
Heads!
OK, I'll leave it. It'll ring the
alarms at airports!
They changed the lock.
What happened, did you comb hair
with a can opener?
Where's my stuff?
It was in the cellar.
But you know people...
After 3 days, there was not more
than odd socks left
That's my hat.
Hey ...
My little Bazil ...
For you, fell off the back of a truck.
100% cotton.
You got a job
you'll find a home.
Good morning.
Is Serge in?
Well! If it isn't Bazil!
You've come back!
I almost didn't.
I hope they took the lead
from your head.
I'm back, faithful to the position.
But the position was not
faithful to you.
I had to replace you.
This is Lola.
Three-month trial.
We just signed a permanent contract.
Ah ...
Well, we haven't kissed.
Mr. Bazil!
Don't listen to him.
In fact, I have a boyfriend.
His name is Ricardo.
He picks me up every night
on his motorcycle.
He always parks there.
Where you were shot.
One day, while riding...
We heard a small noise,
like a pebble stuck in the tire.
Mr. Bazil, it was not a pebble.
Which hand?
Make an effort.
She puts her head under her feet
and her toes in the nose
And then does the splits.
She spins and
coils like a caterpillar.
Suddenly, her legs around his neck
She spins, like a ball
and nibbles his knees.
The rubber woman.
With her, what fun they can
have. Ah, it's crazy.
It's enough to make you
go funny in the head.
They search below and they
find it underneath.
The rubber woman.
Thank you ...
You got five minutes?
I spent my life in jail.
So they call me "Closet".
I'm Bazil.
I know.
You're a sweet in a jar.
You've been on the streets for 2 months,
but you've not submerged, you have a
purpose. What is it?
I live day to day.
With the bullet,
that could make me trip out anytime.
Me, the widow maker gave me
this injury.
The guillotine in '59.
The guillotine jammed.
It happened twice.
I was pardoned.
Get that bullet out of your head.
Impossible.
The surgeon said ...
Because ...
You follow me.
A family will adopt you.
Hi.
Hi!
That's Max.
Here we're home.
We share our home.
This is our little goose of the Capitol.
If the robber is pointing ...
Whistle blasts
Ha! Ha!
Go, go, my little guy.
Come in, don't be shy.
Wakey
Come, let me introduce...
For recruitment,
it is she who decides.
You collect stray bullets?
Yes, ma'am.
Say!
I'm Tambouille.
Here stuff is recovered,
we sort and repair it.
Everybody together.
Even little Pierre.
And, he's an artist.
He brings anything we can use.
59...
42 ...
104!
Nickel.
She's called "Calculator".
Father and mother unknown.
He has a compass in his eye.
The white man
a compass in the eye
...starvation
begins at the top...
...and goes from cock to the ass.
Yes!
"The compass in the eye".
Note.
He was a writer in Brazil.
Fracasso is my name.
I have carbon staples...
...in my throat.
He lost a lung in a water bottle
explosion.
and also have a cycle Dynamo
in my stomach ...
...and 3 neck joints
of titanium.
Well, go ahead, tap away.
Go ahead, it's titanium!
Go!
Go ahead!
Oh!
He dreams of getting his name
in the Guinness Book of Records.
I already did in 77!
212 meters: Record of the human cannonball.
We never saw
the certificate.
I was robbed!
I've told you already.
Hey, you!
Why do you get him upset?
Now that you belong to the
Family ...
...get me
a small pot of cream in the fridge.
Further down, boy!
Aaaahh!
You want my picture?
She's a little snappish...
...but she's always the first
to bend for for others.
You're a contortionist?
No, I am the vegetable crisper.
She was like that from birth...
At 5, she already was hiding
in the pantry.
And he remained so long
the closet ...
...without laces in his shoes
that he's forgot how to tie them!
Come!
Come to the table, the mash is ready.
Speaking a Flemish dialect.
Can I help you?
Yes, I would like to see
Mr. De Fenouillet.
Of course,
you have an appointment?
That is to say,
I have something in mind.
It concerns him.
If this is a project or idea,
send an email.
I could send him a scan,
but I prefer to see him.
You'll have to leave.
Yes. Warning!
Warning!
Warning! Warning!
Boo!
Show this clown to the street,
that's all.
A bullet in the head?
At least he'll remember us!
Guys, I need someone here!
Go!
You know
we're leaders ...
... in the field of
cluster munitions.
We have quadrupled our sales
in the Gulf ...
... decreased by 7 to 9%
on collateral damage.
As you know,
we're not monsters.
We don't want anyone's death.
We all know very well ...
... a wounded soldier is more expensive
than a dead soldier!
Our CBS-87
disperses 202 projectiles ...
... and cleans the equivalent
of 4 football fields.
We have been present
in the Gulf, Kosovo. ..
... in Afghanistan ...
In short, it is time to call ...
... to this forum
the architect of our success.
Our CEO:
François Marconi!
Thank you, thank you.
Thank you all.
Tracers ...
... explosive or bullets ...
... ours are the best ...
... the most aggressive and powerful.
Rimbaud began as a poet
Finally as an arms dealer.
Well, I...
I'll do the opposite.
But until retirement ...
... I will continue to rhyme
ambition with ammunition...
... Living with dynamite.
Love live Vigilatne Armament!
Goodnight, Mr. President.
General...
Joseph, good night!
I remind you...
...of the new rule in force.
A landmine
was placed under the playing surface
Yes, it is a renewed challenge ...
...offered by the league.
The suspense was short-lived
as frontcenter ...
...the visiting team
just paid the price.
You were brilliant tonight.
- Thanks, George.
Arthur Rimbaud arms dealer,
in history?
Yes, but it didn't prevent him from dying
of gangrene, when they amputated of his leg.
Baudelaire, of syphilis?
Verlaine, delirium tremens ...
...Lorca was shot ...
...Nerval hanged himself from a
lamppost.
I will encourage my son to
become a poet, sir.
Tomorrow,
wake me up at 10am
Yes, sir.
You've worked for us
long?
30 years next month.
Ah ...
Why don't we...
...upgrade this place for your 30 years?
With some high-tech equipment.
The old pots make the best soups.
Hum ...
Change is coming.
At least once
every 30 years.
Why can't he sleep at the foot
of the bed?
Stop moaning!
Birds of a feather flock together.
Hey, Grandma?
Croutons!
Cello and musical saw
...
The day went well?
Yes, papa.
I was brilliant tonight.
My speech was fantastic.
I was compared to Rimbaud.
You know who he is?
Yes, but you're not that muscula.
No, not "Rambo", darling, "Rimbaud."
Put him to bed.
Yes, sir.
Hello? Yes.
No, wait ...
How did you get this number?
Yes, I see.
No, this kind of transaction,
not over the phone.
No! No more ...
I prefer a public place.
I know ... Say Wednesday ...
... 3pm, the sports dept. of
Galeries Lafayette.
Yes, that's it.
Waffles ...
...d'Brussels!
Cries of joy
Do not eat too much,
I put the rum in the batter.
Hey, stop!
Speaking in Flemish dialect
She speaks Chinese
Hurry, the minots!
They'll be ready soon!
Mr. Fracasse...
Isn't this you, here
in the Guinness Book of Records?
Yikes!
The 77!
What did I tell you!
What I tell you ...
Ha! Ha!
"On July 14, 1977,
Theodore Henri de Montreuil"...
Who is Theodore Henry?
..."beat by 9 meters ...
..."the record of human-cannonball
prepared by Mr. grampee on 66" Ha!
"Beat by 9 meters"!
Yes!
You'll give it to me, kid.
Oh no.
Ah yes, please, if you give me.
But no.
If you give me.
You sign my t-shirt, then.
"T. Henri" ...
Thierry Henry.
Fracasso, I have a job for you.
I'm not joking...
...but I think
there's a catch.
You've got an idea
in that head?
Mister poses a mystery.
Well, who cares, you're not curious.
Oh ... Oh!
What time?
Tomorrow, 10am,
opposite the tomb of Sacha Guitry.
Mr. Marconi?
I am the messenger of
Omar Boulounga.
Omar Boulounga ...
The former dictator ...?
The former and the next.
He's preparing a revolution.
I don't have a polical view.
We require rifles,
grenades and mines.
And the DGA, the Export Committee
the Ottawa Treaty?
You have all the weapons
In stock.
You don't have an export sector
in Zamibia.
We'd like one.
And this should interest me?
Check us out.
We'll give you double the cash and
more in diamonds if we succeed.
Continue.
Mr. Boulounga's national account...
...the diamond mines.
Don't sneeze!
Think of something, fast!
Zebras are white with black stripes
or black with white stripes?
Oh, pygmies!
Are there dwarves among pygmies?
Why we say "CIA"
and not "ifeow"?
Or "f-bi-ouch" and not "FBI?
Think ...
...but do not delay too much,
we returned to Conakry Monday.
You!
Yes, you!
I do not know what your shenanigans
are about...
...but either you go and continue
doing everything alone ...
...or you stay
and ask us for help.
Am I clear?
Some of them want to help me?
What?
I found the manufacturer of the bullet
and the mine that killed my father.
I need to do two things at once
I can't do it alone.
Stick together ...
They're the watchmen.
Inside is the dealer.
The drug's hidden in the mailbox.
That way, if they're ever searched...
...they are white as snow.
Let's go!
You've already done it for the crash
and whiplash at the same time?
You're old school.
Yes?
Asbestos Control.
A problem was reported.
But there's no asbestos here!
We didn't find asbestos in the
devil vauvert.
From the crack of dawn ...
...we dealt with that problem.
So no need to rock the boat.
Ah!
Oh! But ...
The widow told me she'd
never leave.
Wherever I go, it's on my back.
Hats off!
And my receipt?
The more one drinks,
more one is right!
The boarding hall, please?
My brother, you want a magical necklace?
Get you into heaven.
The powder wards off evil spirits.
But yes! Ha! Ha!
Ah, you're the boss?
Commander!
Here!
It will protect you against the
devil ...
...and the vagaries of fate.
Incense that will allow you
contact the deceased.
Let the passengers be!
I've told you 100 times!
This is your last warning. Get away!
Sorry, gentlemen.
Wishing you a safe journey.
Sorry, if you please,
sir.
Hello.
We're seeking the plane to America.
The departure hall?
Yes, we go to Manhattan
to visit ...
...my son.
You must register your baggage before.
It's half-sister...
...my son who left in 1989
for New York.
New York ...
You're talking to me?
In 1988.
On December 12, 1988.
Last call for Conakry.
Lufthansa Flight 202.
The vertebra of Tino Rossi.
Winston Churchill's
Fingernail clippings.
The molar Marilyn ...
Monroe.
The foot of Salma Lazarus.
Heart of Louis XVI.
The finger of Matisse.
The eye of Mussolini ...
Sniff, ringing
Nothing doing.
It is expected that the DGA launched
the study and called the Saudis.
Yes, it was more an individual effort
than group... rather well done.
Well, they will not provide the
source code.
If it works?
Remember the Sarajevo market.
The collateral damage added value
in the media.
But of course ...
That's why it kills me to say.
You and me, we work ...
...in the defense industry ...
...not in the attack industry.
I beg you, dear friend.
You are always welcome.
My respects to madame.
I'm already 10 minutes late,
hurry!
What was that, Maurice?
"Stephen", sir.
Stephen, yes!
We have a flat, I think.
Sorry, I'll check.
Peasant.
Hello.
I have a reservation
in the name of De Fenouillet.
Yes.
You are expected.
I am the right hand of
Mr. De Fenouillet.
He asked me to tell you that the
eye of Mussolini interests him.
In exchange for Achilles hell and
Adam's apple of...
1, 2, 3 ... test.
1, 2, 3 ... test.
I am the messenger of Omar Boulounga.
Go ahead, make me an offer.
Do not put the cart before
the horse. It will save us...
...from having 2 feet
in the same hoof.
If you have the eye of Mussolini...
...I'll give you the molar of Marilyn.
It's worth it.
I've got the finger of Matisse
and fingernails of Churchill ...
...name the price.
What say you, Mr. Lazarus?
Mr. Lazarus had a setback,
he had to leave.
Unfortunately,
Mr. Lazarus had to stand you up.
He returned to his household.
Who are you?
I am the messenger of Omar Boulounga.
Boulounga?
I thought ...
We were done?
Nay.
A popular revolution...
A popular revolution.
Omar will return where
Omar belongs.
I'm not interested in politics.
It doesn't bring you bread.
Double the cash...
...plus more diamonds ...
...if the usurper ...
...takes to his heels
and Boulounga back to the pinnacle.
When, how and where?
Tuesday the 27th, one of your men.
Just one...
Will be at the station at
2:45 with the samples.
He'll buy a ticket for
Crecy-la-Chapelle and leave...
...with a deposit ...
...of 30% cash ...
...dollars and cents.
Well?
The operator's transferring me.
Marconi?
Omar Boulounga in person.
So you thought?
Ha! Ha!
Congratulations, you're now looking
at noon to 2pm.
I did not invent sliced bread...
...but I don't mistake candles
for lanterns.
Well, I want one man
present...
with samples at the
Gare de l'Est tomorrow at 2:45.
He'll get a ticket
for La Ferte-Milon.
He will leave with 1st deposit
of the order. OK?
Right. OK!
Ready for more, guys?
Why "guys"?
Well, because there'll be action.
Ah! When there is action,
it's not for girls?
Preconception...
Uh ...
You're not a real...
Real what?
A real girl! Is that it?
I wouldn't not say that.
If that's it.
No.
Is it! Is that what you got wanted say.
No.
Did you mean I'm a tomboy?
That's right.
When I have to fold into a bag,
I'm in the club!
Ladies and gentlemen,
arms traffickers ...
... currently waiting
in this station.
Be vigilant.
Do not buy a landmine from
a dealer on the run.
You risk him using it.
Thank you for your attention.
Wow! What's that?
1kg 720 steel
350 grams of polycarbonate ...
...70 grams of kevlar.
And that's not a small Uzi is it?
It's a MAC 10
maybe even even 11.
No, no!
You step on it, you'll lose your foot!
Oh ...
Or your life, perhaps.
Ooh la la
That's for recycling! It's not for us.
I didn't recycle it,
it fell off the back of a tank!
Confiscated!
Thurs tomorrow, play naughty!
Or is Scarface
and his return to Chicago!
If it wasn't here...
Ready for Phase 2?
Strike the iron is hot!
Let's draw!
De Fenouillet, here's Boulounga.
Your Rights
did not appear!
The deal is obsolete. The Vigilante
Armament offered me better.
Make a cross on the diamond
and butter in the spinach.
Music worrying
He sighs.
...
Marconi Boulounga for Omar.
If you could do it
a bit more sober.
Marconi? Boulounga is pissed!
Your boy took to his heels.
The deal is dead and gone.
Aubervillers Armaments are
better customers. Goodbye!
Tambouille,
I have to go out between 1 and 2pm.
Your 2 sharks have taken the bait?
For now, they're biting.
I'm...
...just going to sweeten the pot!
But when it bites,
it will be well hooked..
It's big.
Then I...
Then 'We'
We'll turn the screws.
No, not until we see their faces.
Not gay, gay.
Guet!
Guards!
Yes. Oh well ...
I need volunteers to go on the
roof. Thank you, Calculator.
It's good to have people to
count on.
Good ...
Uh ... where are you going then?
Well, wherever you go.
Excuse me, but I must handle
a delicate matter.
I prefer to go alone.
Ah, I understand.
It is true that in matters
of delicacy ...
...and even subtlety ...
...you're an expert.
"The Diva of Porn,"
She will please you!
Something of a pencil sharpener!
Great, but do you won a nightgown.
I sleep naked.
Hey, Henry ...
...you spell Henri
Not with a Y but with an I.
Oh? Are you sure?
Thierry Henri?
Yeah.
It would be wrong, Thierry Henry?
Do not worry, I'm always game
for the cyclops sneeze.
Well, we'll do as you ask?
Yeah.
Soon.
This evening.
Well?
I thought...
...you're fishing for shark,
not cod or herring!
We're not married.
No, we're not married
Anyway,
perverts are not my thing.
Like me
with contortionists.
My mother always told me
to distrust the twisted.
I'm not twisted.
I am a sensitive soul
in a flexible body.
This is not the same.
Hello?
Listen to me.
You listen to me!
Camel!
I despise your shenanigans!
But the Boulounga diamonds
where you like!
Dickless!
I appears that the teeth, fingers ...
... the bones of the Assyrian kings,
the looting of the Baghdad museum?
If you want war,
think twice about ti!
When one is fortunate to have
divorced...
... to advantage, one doesn't
choose as as mistress...
...the wife of the Prime Minister.
I also have the recording at home.
Well, gotta say ...
...that Grandpa and Grandma
did it in the dark.
So doing it in front of everyone...
...is just a little more dramatic...
...a little more creative,
a little more flexible, right?
Bazil! Hey!
Boo!
Oh ...
Let's go.
And, I'm not too girly to act
the alley cat?
No, precisely why we needed a person...
Flexible!
We needed a person
like you, feline and female.
Oh dear ...
Marignan?
1515.
Nagasaki?
17 kilotons.
Kiss?
Hello, sir.
Something happened last night.
It's most unusual.
Sir!
Come on, Maurice.
"Stephen", sir.
I have a delivery
Mr. De Fenouillet.
You're out of luck,
he just left.
Leave it to me.
It's a bit heavy.
Ah ...
Go ahead.
There.
7 meters 50 centimeters,
4 millimeters.
The rubber woman
With her, you can go crazy.
She'll make you funny in the head.
It seeks the above
And is found below
The rubber woman.
Pip squeak.
You've washed your hands?
YES!
- Let's see.
Hey, you!
There is no laughing at the table.
She imitates.
Where are thee,
with thy merchants of death?
- They're hooked the more they struggle,
the more they're trapped.
Oh ... when I think
of those poor mothers ...
...who lose their children
because of mines.
You know Tambouille?
She had 2 little girls.
One evening at the Fair of the Throne ...
...they saw them enter
in the labyrinth.
She never saw them come out.
For years, she has searched
the streets.
Eventually, she became a tramp.
And after all that,
She adopted us.
Fifififi ...
Enough, you lowly masses.
What can you see my
little salty?
Fat: 62%, protein: 4% ...
OH!
Ben who?
A little salty is as it should be...
...a black belt
at Cordon Bleu.
Oh, surely not ...
Even if... oh no.
You got an idea for cooking
your 2 big fish?
Frying.
There's more to roll in flour.
In the flour!
Fracasso, no doubts?
No! He has no doubts.
Go! We will balance the Fracasse!
It blows.
Calculator!
Distance: 138 meters.
Wind Speed: 12 km / h
Direction: south/southwest.
There.
Weight of the projectile?
76 kilos.
Add 4.
It's Tambouille's fault.
OK ... say 80.
Why did you add more?
Slice: 70 grams.
Butter: 37 g. Jam ...
Okay, okay!
Come on, get ready.
Remington!
For the committee's approval!
Engine!
It's time to go.
No, it's too early. 59 ...
58 ...
...
57 ...
56 ...
55 seconds.
Oh!
Closet, well then?
What? It's recycled!
It's old...
Oh!
Closet!
You Bastard!
But it's recycled!
Fire!
Watch out!
Come on, move!
Watch out!
No batteries?!
How?!
It's recycled.
It's recycled?!
I broke the altitude record!
and I had proof!
One minute, butterfly!
What?
I devoted myself to the filming!
That's the last straw!
No Battery.
It's an unwritten law:
One key to the equipment.
It's going to explode.
It's her.
Code 5, no quarter.
You are Madame Cisse?
Yes.
Your husband had a problem.
What happened?
Your husband is ashamed:
He lost your residency permit.
Then I only have to request
a duplicate.
That's what I did
with Edward Mangin ...
...my friend the Prefect of Police.
But your record was not found.
But I assure you...
hmmm?
Who are you?
I'm part of the company
that employs your husband.
You see, our activities relate to...
...national defense ...
At the same time,
Obviously ...
we feel oblige to protect
children.
I can always try
put pressure on my friend Mangin
That's good,
I'm seeing him tomorrow evening.
I know,
you think what?
Show him.
In all arsenals,
they have the same machine.
You see where she is?
It's essential, it must be installed
with ...
...bulkhead opening on the outside..
...like that.
This has been done
to guide the air out ...
...in case of...
The technician will activate the machine
behind the door.
ideally we would be to proceed ...
...during lunch
when the machine is paused.
What should I do?
Almost nothing.
You unscrew the small tube
you slide the steel ball out ...
...and that's all.
Is this dangerous?
Returning to Somalia
is dangerous too.
I put it where I?
Ah!
Do not bother to
seek the dust underneath.
You have a moment?
It is forbidden to park here
with this load.
Don't worry, I'll be quick.
By God!
That's weird.
Usually, he warns me.
In the time of his father
you would not come.
There's nothing to sign?
No.
Thank you very much.
Bazil, this blackmail evidence,
What is it?
It may be a video ...
...tape, envelopes,
photos ...
It can be anything
and anywhere.
Thanks for the clarification.
From there, please.
That slab ...
We enter.
Where's the package?
I understand it was there.
The nanny had put it away.
No, your son is with his mother.
His mother ...
Ah yes, true.
Get me the package.
I assure you ...
I understand.
Oh, this will be sweet...
... this afternoon
Aubervilliers Arsenal ...
... doing extensive
damage.
No casualties were reported.
An investigation is underway
to determine the causes.
Recall that the CEO
Nicolas Thibault de Fenouillet ...
... has been sited in cases
of influence peddling.
... but he's not been replaced at
this time.
- I defy anyone to make ...
bullshit!
... no tangible evidence!
It is a scandal!
The information on LCI.
Calm, calm... Breath.
Practice:
The crucial issues.
Number 12: Who...
...invents jokes?
No. 27: Why the place we seek on
a map always in the fold?
No. 62: How much erosion is caused
by walking?
The CEO
Nicolas Thibault de Fenouillet ...
... has been cited in cases of
influence peddling...
... and has been fired.
- Ah! Bullshit!
... no tangible evidence!
Bullshit.
Ongoing information on LCI.
You want a war?
It will be the blitzkrieg!
- Sir, We have a go?
Go!
Go.
Go.
Go!
Ah! What now..
That's it then?
You thought
we would rot in prison?
You're impressed by our resolve?
- Exercise # 8: Money ...
Cash, money moola, wonga,
lucre, grease..
...dosh, pennies!
Yeah!
No!
Tut tut tut ... Hush.
Oh ...
Oh! No!
- I came to
give you a little lesson ...
...but these clown
gave me another idea.
Oh no ...
How?
You'd never take such a risk.
What risk?
You refused to sell arms to
rebels who were fomenting a coup.
They planted a bomb
in Arsenals
...before coming
to get you!
We rushed to your aid...
Isn't that so, Libarski?
We arrived a bit too late.
This is perfect.
Wait, wait ...
Ah!
I'll give you the tape
with evidence.
The teeth, fingers,
the looting of Baghdad Museum.
You take it and you leave.
It's not enough.
Oh, okay,
stop your bullshit!
OK,
I would not have sabotaged your plant.
But you stole my shells.
What shells?
Well ...
...the shell truck.
You stole a shell truck.
We did what?
No.
It wasn't us.
The truck, wasn't me.
It was probably them.
Yes, it must be them.
Him... it's him!
He was spotted in the video!
He was disguised as a server.
I thought it worked for you.
I thought he worked for you...
...dirty trick number 2.
What madness!
Who do you work for?
Er... I'm on my own.
I have a bachelor flat.
We'll question him there?
My car is outside.
It's not too early!
You're late.
The problem is over.
That's him.
Oh ...
Aeschylus died after ...
...a turtle hit his head.
Jean-Baptiste Lully,
died of gangrene.
Barbarossa, by forgetting to remove
his armor to cross a river.
And I'm dying stupidly too
feeling like a jerk.
Closet, Plan B.
Emergency!
Bridge of Crimea!
Everyone out!
Ha! Ha! Ha!
...
Come on, jump!
- 240, 230 ...
...220210 ...
... 200, 190, 180, 170 ...
... 160, 150 ...
... 130, 120 ...
... 110, 90, 70 ...
And .. and ... and ... now!
Drop the trash!
Slowly.
Oh shit...
It picks up garbage!
They're over us...
on the bridge!
The carrots are cooked,
you have drawn a blank.
Hope you enjoy the sun.
We're paying for your vacation in
North Africa.
Closet, good landing, thank you.
- Hey! Hey! It's ...
RECYCLED'!
Encore.
Encore!
You recognize this?
and you, recognize this?
Shhh! Tut tut tut ...
Don't move.
Don't move.
You want a ransom?!
Demand a price we can afford.
I am a friend ...
...with the President of the Republic.
Take away this grenade, it's ridiculous!
We'll call,
you'll see, he will pay.
Articulate, bitch!
What do you want?
Sorry, sorry ...
...for the children.
Ah yes ...
That's forgiveness.
Sorry for women ...
...who are raped
in the wars!
I sell weapons to people
who stop wars.
- You Bastard!
You still sell
Landmines!
I am for terrorism.
Me too.
The Boeing 300 died of Ankara ...
The explosive was ours!
You were using
I was providing ...
...ETA and the IRA.
- And on Darfur, where do you think
their explosives from?
You encouraged the market?
Kind of pathetic!
Video traffickers
Go to YouTube ...
...and type
"arms dealers caught".
Guys, come see.
Mr. Marconi, if you please!
The price of your shares
collapsed.
You may serve 15 years.
What's your defense?
Fenouillet dropped
by his former political friends ...
... by the President of the Republic
Himself ...
... is on the run
to an unknown location.
We expect one day to see the closing
of Arsenals of Aubervilliers.
As soon as the 2 merchants of death
hit the floor.
...Bazil, proud as Lucifer, beat
his breast and made amends ...
There was no need
to be a genius ...
...to understand that they would
with eyes of Chimène.
And it was no secret ...
They get along like a house on fire.