Meeting (2020) - full transcript

Hello

Hi! I'm Elisabeth

For the meetup group right? YES!

Nice to meet you come on in.

Such a lovely house

Thank you. It's my mum's actually.

She is out of town.
Doesn't even know that I'm

Oh darling

don't be nervous

it will be fine

could you



do you mind if I just pop to the loo?

Of course sweetheart

No problem I will just

make myself comfortable

How could you do such a thing you idiot?

Oh, I didn't hear the door

Sorry, did you..

Darling this is John

He is a wonderful pianist

I met him at one of my
meetups, where we'd sing songs.

I met him at one of my
meetups, where we'd sing songs.

Right? You two know each other from before?

Hi. It's Can actually, it's a Turkish name

No no no you can call
me John I don't mind it



Oh! Hold on let me get that

This is exciting

people are coming!

Linda!

What was that song you
sang last time with John!

Oh, Light Me Up. It's my
boyfriend's composition

Your boyfriend's composition?

I have it!

No way

Way!

Baby

I see you walking past me

But I swear your soul kissed

my eternity

Hold me

closely

with every touch I'll make you

believe in me

You killed me

with purity

you separated all the blood in my soul

light me up

tone me down

moi your palette

vous my song

Your touch illustrates

colors into my skin

Oh, wonderful!

I want to propose a toast

to the lady who brought music to this party

Oh! Thank you

That's why I love organising music groups

you get to sing together

and you have so much fun

This is what young people need
to bear in mind and take away

Music is the way to stay

modest

and humble in this world

I don't want to sound like
the annoying uncle but..

Well, I'm afraid you do

When you generalise
about "all young people"

and then you talk about
modesty and humility

sorry it's just a real bugbear of mine

Sorry

Who are you?

I'm Samantha

Why? Does that make a difference?

Guys, come on

Is that the booze talking?

No, just me being a bitch

Oh, I need to get this sorry

You know honey

I truly believe, that when
one believes enough

there's nothing one can't achieve

"The secret!"

Yes darling! We create our
own destiny with our energy

Look, I'm sorry to interrupt
but can I also state my opinion?

I think all this "energy and believe in it
and let your dreams come true is bullshit"

Of course! It's all about taking selfies
and posting on facebook and instagram.

Not worth chasing your goals

You know that's not my point at all

and I don't take pictures and
post what I eat on instagram

I think these so called "secret" and other cliched
sayings are just as commercial as your examples

What cliche? The girl sings wonderfully and a
living example of what we are all talking about here

The girl doesn't sing at Carnegie Hall.

She sings her boyfriend's
songs at meetup parties.

Oh it's not commercial enough for
you. Whatever happened to simplicity and

I'm not saying those are bad and I don't understand
why everyone's got hostile when I express my opinion

Not everyone

I think these days, just like
on facebook and instagram

people made plastic versions of deep
philosophies and psychological complexities

and then they sell them by
making them sound simple

You know that they are sweet
tricks to attract naive people.

Oh you're making such a big thing of it.

You have quite a big ego don't you?

Shouldn't you be at home reading
books and not wasting time at parties?

I think may be you are right

Guys.. come on

Well seriously, first we have
"all young people" generalization

now we have this "psychology,
philosophy, I know all that"

I didn't say that

No, but it's obvious
that's what you're thinking

Ok and who are you to judge me like that?

Guys please, can we not spend the whole night
arguing and throwing sass at each other?

Let's show some respect for our host.

Now I'm disrespectful

Seriously I will not have
this anymore at my house

You're right honey don't be sad

why don't we lighten the mood a bit?

I'm not sad

John! Honey, play something for us

No, seriously if I play the
piece I've been practising lately

This party is going to be doomed

Mmm I like the sound of that

It's so difficult. I..

Oh come on honey
this is not a concert hall!

Okay

for the sake of changing the mood

I'll give it a go

is anyone gonna tell me what's going on?

Now people go missing?

It's all right darling, I got you!

It makes sense

She's fainted

No way?

Do you mind?

Oh fuck! Fuck

Jody?

Wait, Jody!

Jody!

JODY!

Jody!

Jody!

Jody wait! Jody stop!

Jody

I'm not going to hurt you

Listen to me

Jody

Jody wait!

Jody! wait!

Jody

I know what you're thinking

What?

You know what

What do you want me to say?

I mean You're bloody fainting or whatever

and you wake up on the floor and you are
telling me this is not one of your episodes?

Lara I told you, and I told mum

this wasn't one of those

if you just get in touch with these people

you have it all clear in your
mind, you'll know what happened

Yeah and face the humiliation

what humiliation?

Come on Lara, you know these
people played a prank on me!

Or what are you saying?

I just passed out and had an
hour long hallucination is that it?

I'm not saying anything and I
told you, don't put this on me

This is not helping

Julie I want to help you

I'm just trying to understand Julie

Ok.

So the way I see it, there's two options

the first, you are right. They played
a huge prank on you, well done them

Second

you know you've been on so much medication

Second! Right, second!

I'm crazy.

Julie come on

Don't Julie me. It's
so easy for you isn't it?

I'm trying to help you

I'm not just talking about you, it's
all of you. You, mum, everybody!

You have no idea what
I'm going through do you?

Let go

Give up

You know it's best

There's a woman upstairs

I told you they are chasing
after me. No one believes me

I'm not making this up

She must have left

Oh...

Mum. I know that tone.

We both know it don't we?

Can I just...

Mum please

Baby!

Please don't do that!

What have you done to yourself?

My baby!

Why?

I'm giving this to you

But I'm not letting go of the meaning
and the experience that we shared

I'll keep that forever

and I know you will too

I will

I don't have any words any more

guess that's the point right?

Shall we hug?

Thank you

Hi Julianne

thanks for calling

I've got your e mail

I can fit you in at 4 o'clock tomorrow.

4 o'clock tomorrow is fine

Great, I'll see you at my private practise

Ok

Ok. Bye

Bye

Hey!

Hey

I organised this meetup
party for creative people

It just went awfully wrong

They are all after me now

They are trying to kill me

in my dreams

but

it just seems so real

I'm really scared I'm actually going to die

Did this start about the party?

Your dreams I mean

I've always had trouble with my sleep

sleepwalking,

when half awake, hallucinating

but nothing this extreme

there is something really wrong this time

This woman Elisabeth

and the piano guy John

he played this piece at the party and

everything just went wrong after that

What was it like before this happened?

What kind of people are they?

They were actually the nicest
and the friendliest ones towards me

I don't understand

That's interesting

so they were nice

and now they're your monsters

Yes. They were really supportive

And how are you?

What, now?

Not just now

In general

Do you support yourself?

I

I

My questions made you sad

I

I hurt

I've got no choice

I look like this cheerful
and nice person but

I'm this..

This!

You feel you have no choice.

It helps you to hurt yourself

I understand

You do?

Have you seen a therapist before Julianne?

A psychiatrist..

My mum took me

He said I had bp something.

Borderline? Bipolar?

Borderline

He was an asshole

Didn't end well

Ended quite messy actually

Life isn't always beautiful

How do these people kill you?

They strangle me

Can just pushed me to the ground and

Elisabeth caught me off guard

If you see them in your dreams

they aren't other people

What do you mean?

You catch yourself off guard

You are strangling yourself

Ok. You are scaring me now.

I don't mean to scare you Julianne

but what you're saying already is scary

Where do these people come from?

Who brings them here?

Oh right, here you go

You know what? You can go to hell

All of you

I don't know why I even bothered

What's wrong Julianne?

What's wrong?

You are wrong

All these people are in my head

right?

Well good for you, so clever, you nailed it

I don't understand

You won't need to

I don't think you should go like this

Yeah? watch me!

No

What?

Who do you think you
are? Get out of my way!

I'm not getting out of your way
until you manage to stay with me

Don't you fucking shout
at me you crazy bi...

I am not shouting at you because I'm angry

I'm trying to reach you

What is this?

You think you can use force to stop me

Look into my eyes. Is that what you see?

What are you doing?

I'm trying to stay with you Julianne

Why?

Because I think no one else does

Is my hand all right there?

I don't want to do this

I know

I know it's painful

But I'm here

and I want to be here

In your pain

What happened there

I'm interested in your reaction

Has this happened before?

You have no idea what
I'm going through do you?

Fuck your care! Thanks for
your loving and caring chat

Almost always

Right

You didn't have to be a bitch though

I know

I'm sorry

I had to improvise

I'm not feeling worse

I won't stay for long

I just want to make
sure you are in one piece

Mum I don't want to talk about this

That's why people go to
therapy right? It's private

Oh do they now?

And what's there to keep
from one's own mother?

Who's worried as hell

and who's getting messages
from her daughter's best friend

that she's worried

All I wanted is for you..

Yeah that's not fair is
it? What do you want..

What do I want ha?

Oh

Did she give you that individualistic crap?

I should have found you a therapist

Mum can you stop making this about her?

I just told her what happened and

The party

Yeah. Not just that

What do you mean?

Oh

Did someone leave you Julianne?

Oh we are not going there

I think we are there

I think you are there all the time

What?

Do that some more

What? Why?

Looks like they're doing the talking

They are doing what you're not saying

I don't want to talk about it

Then don't

Let your hands do the talking

Here

Try on this

Come on

Do it some more

How does it feel?

Stupid

Yes

What else?

More stupid?

So say it

Say it to the stupid cushion. Try

What? Stupid?

Yes

Try it more

But..

Come on Julianne

Say it

Let go

Listen to your body

What do you notice?

My back

Stupid

You're angry Julianne

You seem angry

I am angry! I'm fucking angry!

Yes. Julianne

I'm with you let go

I can't

I can't

Who is it Julianne?

What the cushion?

Who left you?

My father

When?

I never met him

I'm trying to reach you

You are strangling yourself

Am I supposed to feel guilty about it now?

How wonderful the way you emphasize the "I"

No I should

Oh mum please don't
start with the I should haves

What?

You are looking for someone to blame

and you don't want to take it

fine, blame me

blame me for not burning that bloody letter

Blame me for having you

I chose to understand him

forgive him

No listen, he's a ghost in my life

I mean, you don't talk about him

all I know is that he didn't want me

and he didn't want you because of me

I think you should stop seeing that woman

I don't want your nose in all this OK?

My nose?

I'm paying for it

Yeah

Well listen, I want you out of here

I want it more than you
do, you spoiled little brat

Go snivel to that so sacred therapist

It's too early to play the jealous card!

She never drank it did she?

Leave it

I was really worried about you

it was an absolute horrow show
you went through you know?

Yeah

Are you still seeing that therapist?

Yeah I am

And actually its after seeing
her that I've been feeling different

How long do you have to see her for?

Is there a time when she just
says "darling you're cured"?

It's gonna be a while

I mean we have an open ended contract

And..

She says " We are at a very
important point in our journey"

Oh yes?

What?

Well I know I know it's
private and everything,

but I mean if you wanted to give me any
juicy details on what you guys talk about

Yeah of course

I wouldn't have a stroke telling you

It just all comes down to mum

I know she'd freak out if she
knew how much she damaged me

but I know she didn't do it intentionally

Yeah. Parents. Constantly
unintentionally fucking things up.

Yep!

So this serious work, tell me. You know,

what is it she says to you
that actually makes a difference

it's not so much about what she says

it's more about how she is

she has a way of entering
and touching the core of things

So she touches and enters?

Yeah!

She entered and touched my monsters!

And then,

and only then, can you
learn to love yourself

Oh yes!

No I mean seriously,

I know we are joking and all,

but

there's something really weird
and unique happening in that room

But you gotta admit it just sounds a bit

What?

Well, all of this

going back to your childhood

talking about mother issues

it's not exactly going into your childhood

I'm realising more and more it's

we're all still in our childhoods, you know

and somewhere along the way we desperately
try and adapt to this adult world

at least I am

the thing is you can't spend your entire life just
playing around, there has to be some limitation

Why not?

I mean, if everyone followed their heart

at least we'd have real people

instead of institutionalized zombies

in that party,

Samantha was so bitchy

I'm not

That piano guy, he was so creative. I'm not

Elisabeth was so kind, I don't deserve it

Jody was upfront, I can't
be seen to be that rude

Who am I in all this?

I need to be myself as well you know?

I see what you're saying but the thing is,

if we were all completely open and
honest with our friends all the time

some of those friendships
would seize to exist

Exactly! So we need to find a
way to embrace that openness

not try and live at this
plastic prison of pretense

Plastic. I like that

All right girls?

Hello darling

Don't mind me I'm just off to the gym

Enjoy your play date

Bay baay

So where were we?

Something about plastic people?

Yeah I mean

I feel like I need to

I need to reset and start from scratch

But I feel so fragile

when you let go of your
habitual ways it's like

you turn into a baby who
is acidentally a 25 year old

It's meeting your true self that's
so painful and sometimes awkward.

That's when Carol nurtures me

that's when she stays compassionate
and firm at the same time

man that's deep

Yeah. It is

Hi Peter it's Carol

So,

sitting here I..

Am very much left with our last meeting

and with

Julianne

Yes

I was a bit defensive last
time we spoke about her

I'm sure that you were concerned

So please,

tell me more about Julianne

well she started to self harm
when she found her father's letter

but I feel the root of her problems
stems way back to her mother's depression

when Julianne was a baby

she grew up with guilt

a sense that she owed
her existence to her mother.

Who chose Julianne after her father

a party mirrored her
projections of her real self

A party?

Yes

Her projections began to haunt her.

As if they were going to
kill her, but in actual fact..

I see where you're going with this Carol

but it's just the way you talk about her

there is something unsettling for me here

is there some particular pull or
confluence for you with Julliane

in terms of your own unfinished business?

My miscarriage

I'm concerned that your longing for your lost girl
is getting in the way of your ethical practise Carol

Yes

I am longing for my lost girl

but it doesn't affect my work

I think it does Carol

it's clear to me that you are unable to gauge
appropriate interventions with this client

I think you are too sensitive to carry
on working with Julianne at this stage.

Especially with her alarming situtation

I will have to consult with
the ethics comitee about this

You must understand

He's just being a jerk

I don't blame him totally

It's a miysterious field

unlike medicine

Yeah I hear what you are saying

I still can't understand why you guys can't
sit down and talk about it with more reason

You've been doing this for
more than 15 years and so is he.

It's all about the human soul and psyche

messy

But you love that aspect of it

for the first time I'm worried
about your career though

I'll be fine

There's no real danger in me
continuing my private practise anyway

Are you sure about that?

Yeah. Just the ethics comitee
still have to make a decision

say something else before I go to sleep

I don't want to dream about my supervisor

Something else

Ohhh

very funny

good night

You're so bad, you're so bad!

You're so naughty

What?

Untie me!

Untie you sweety but, I don't see any ropes

my legs!

"My legs"

This is a nightmare

Ohh "this is a nightmare"

I'll close my eyes

and when I open them
again, it will all be gone

Ohh we both know that isn't true don't we?

It's not a dream

It's happening!

"It's not a dream"

I've got something to tell you

I have something to tell you

I have something to say

It's not going to be easy

but I'll just say it

I don't want to come anymore

it's quite sudden

I'm surprised and

well, curious

Well, I'm not sure what we're
doing here is actually helping me

I do feel different

something did change from the
very first day I came to see you

I don't cut myself that much

almost never

I feel more pain but also more energy

but then again

this is what scares me

this?

This change

my dreams are move vivid and

strange

I'm sleepwalking even more than I used to

Before we decide wether you
want to go on with me or not

shall we talk more about
your dreams and your fear?

Of course

I was raped last night

And it..

It was so real

I can't even begin to tell you how I felt

Do you know who it was?

Lara's boyfriend

so not anyone from the party then this time

No but this was worse

it was disgusting and it was

unacceptable

you mean the rape of course

no I don't mean the rape

Ok. I'm listening

Towards the end of my dream

I went crazy and I started
laughing and enjoying myself

so it wasn't rape after all then

well it was in the beginning

but

then I could move my arms and my legs

but I didn't resist

I felt sort of

free and happy

and mad.

Mad

how does it make you feel now_?

Pregnant

and horrible

pregnant?

I'm scared. I can't go on with this

I really hear your struggle Julianne.

I can only imagine how difficult it must be

for you to trust in

such a painful process

without knowing how or where it will end.

I don't want to carry on with this

The bad news is

Once you are aware there is no turning back

but

if you stay with it, with enough support

you will be nourished

what awareness?

Lara's boyfriend

the rape

I don't think this was just plainly sexual

Do you remember Samantha's visions?

You made piece with her
the more we worked on it

she became you and you became her

and only then were you able
to critisize my hair and my office

you were able to tell Lara that she
wasn't relating to you without losing it

you felt OK about complaining

Samantha. She was there in the dream

She was making out with Frank

I really think something is trying
to get your attention here Julianne

It's almost symbolic

like something is being born

Frank is your best friend's lover

that's hard for you to get a handle on it

it takes courage

it's too new

too unfamiliar

You're right. I can't handle it

nor do I want to

It's hard to let you go
at this point Julianne

especially when you've come such a long way

but

I'm not gonna stop you this time

not like our first meeting

but I want you to know

I genuinely support your struggle

Ok

Thank you Carol

What did Elisabeth look like?

Did she have reddish
hair? Short in her 70s.

Evet ama

Why? Did you meet her?

It's difficult to explain

She said she had something to tell me

What?

I don't know

I woke up

What? She was in your dream?

Yes

I don't understand

I don't understand either

I had an image of us,

when you walked in,
you were trying to leave

We were wrestling

Wrestling?

Yes

Do you want to try it?

As much as you can

I could do this all day

No, no, it's just that
she is not usually late

Not to worry

the piccadilly line is slow anyway

No, no she usually calls

Mmm! This wine is amazing!

Hello darling! There she is

How long since we last saw each other ha?

Don't let her hug you, she'll
probably break your bones

Oh shut up, come on

Hello

Yes, this is she

Sorry?

Oh

Sorry I was just I'm just

What?

Here?

Now?

How did you even..

What do you want?

Please Julianne, I just want to see you

Why?

There is something I have to tell you

I have to say something to you

Does mum know you're here?

Nobody knows

Please Julianne

So dear tell me

How is the practise going?

Darling, you know you can't

Thanks Richard

I'm not really a fan of
talking about my work

but it's fine

I'm sorry, I just want to
know how everything is

everything including

but it's Ok if you don't
want to talk about it

No no, it's fine. It's still the same as you
saw me 7 years ago when I first accredited

Oh what a time that was

Actually, I'm enjoying it even more

Although sometimes the
practicalities are a bit you know..

It's so good to see you
without hiding for once

So this is my girl

I know

nothing I say is gonna
make things any better

Do you also know that what you're
doing is actually making things worse

Just give me 5 minutes

Do you have a favorite client?

Darling, that's like asking
if you have a favorite child

It is a difficult question Richard I agree

Although

I do have a favorite client

I couldn't let go

I missed your mother so much

But we were so very young

I know the story you
don't have to repeat it

What do you want

I wanted to tell you

that none of this was your fault

or your mother's

it was love

stupid love

we were imprisoned as teenagers

but you

you never had any say in any of this

I guess I just

wanted to apologise

and tell you I'll never forgive myself

Goodbye Julianne

I won't be following you anymore

I just want to give you this

I'm not taking this. I'm
not taking anything from..

Please, just watch it and then decide

What is this?

This is you

Right from your first years

I've always been there

like a shadow

watching you

I don't want to hear anything please

Please. Please just take it

Goodbye Julianne

I've always loved you

Dad

What's that in your bag?

Nothing, nothing baby

I have to go

I'm calling the police

No Julianne no. I'm
not going to hurt anyone

Yeah. As if I will trust you

Julianne please. Julianne?

Stop it, stop it

Stop it

Fucking god, stop it!

Stay back

Julianne please put the gun down

please, look

I'll give you your phone back

please put the gun down

give me the gun back Julianne

Stay back!

Or I will shoot you

I'll shoot you in the arm

it won't kill you, but it will hurt

and then I'll call the police

and you can explain to them, what
the hell you're doing here with a gun

or you can explain it to me now

no?

Fine

don't you dare!

Hello

Darling, thank you so much

Bye Bob thank you

it was absolutely fantastic

thank you so much

love the wine

absolutely gorgeous

I'll give you a call next week yeah?

I'll be waiting

Okay safe journey

byee

Stop it!

Oh fucking

Julianne, Jullianne, Julianne

This is meant for me

I need to end this

this is best for everybody.
Please let me do this

Stop it

you ruined my life you fucking

I had too much wine

oh

Honey I'm so proud of you

What?

The way you talked about your client.

You really put your heart and soul into it

Did you see Richard?

I haven't seen him teary eyed in my life

and we've been friends since med school

Trust me, if you don't cry then

you never will

Ohh it's very sweet of you

Oh I gotta go to bed immediately

or you are gonna cry over the puke that's
gonna come over the carpet that you paid for

Oh I can't even speak any English

I can only speak wine language

I gotta go to bed

Julianne!

No!

Can!

Can

Little girl

What are you doing here all alone?

What's your name?

Sandy

Sandy

Where is your mummy Sandy?

Do you know?

What's her name?

Carol

Can

Carol?

Why am I here?

To meet you

No

I'm sorry

come with me

Why? Where?

Over there

No

Just trust me

This is mum!

And that is your dad

This is how your body met isolation

it looks so real

it is real

this is how you adapted to pain

this is how you left your dreams

Julianne!

Blame me for not telling you the truth

for the feelings I had

while you grew inside me

I never regret having you for a second

I've always been there

like a shadow

watching you

Goodbye Julianne

I've always loved you

35 Bollo Bridge Road

I'll get there before the ambulance

What's going on?

Oh Bob, there's been an
emergency, I have to go

What? What emergency?

It's one of my clients

I haven't got time to explain

Honey you can't just leave like this

Oh please Bob I haven't got time to..

I just want to understand...

BOB!

What?

Do you trust me?

Of course I do what do you mean?

Then come with me. I need your help

Bob please

999 what service please?

Hello. This is Carol Ashley. I need an ambulance
immediately to go to 35 Bollo Bridge Road.

Honey wait, I mean, who called
you? I never even heard the phone go

It wasn't a phone

I just know that she's in trouble

Carol! I'm getting really worried now

I know you said you had
too much wine but I never

Bob! Will you just stop?

Please. I need you to trust me

no but how can I? You're out in the
middle of the night with your pygamas,

dragging me along and what for?

Because you know she's in trouble?

Are you coming?

Carol!

Excuse me! Excuse me!

Hey calm down

Who the hell are you?

I'm Julie's therapist

I think she, I think she might be..

Did she call you? Why are you here?

She text me saying her dad was here and..

Oh! We need to open this door!

What are you doing?

Wake up!

What is happening?

Wake up!

Hello Julianne

My name is Zachary

I'm a detective

Where is he?

Is he dead?

He did it didn't he?

Yes Julianne. He is dead

look

I know this is not a good
time to come to you with this

but we need to understand
what happened there Julianne

Julianne

Does mum know?

Yes. She does

How is she? Can I see her?

She's outside

She can see you as soon as I'm done here

Julianne I need to understand
why you fought with your father

I tried to stop him

but I couldn't

you can blame me for that

but I won't

not anymore

Do you have children?

No I don't

A father?

That I do

I had one too

not the one who just
killed himself and shot me

that one loved me

I could see it in his eyes

hear it in his voice

but I didn't recognize that man

I'm more familiar with the one that

left me and my mum

the one who didn't care

I see

Do you know what is most
dangerous in this life detective?

Oh I hope to have an idea by now

Probably not

It's not the guns detective

It's love

Look where love led my father

test people with it

and guns will come out

is that what happened here?

Precisely.

So you admit you killed your..

I admit

that the gun my father brought to my
house was a consequence of his love

and me trying to stop him

was also out of love

Julianne I didn't come here to..

I know you came here for answers detective

but this is all I can offer you

You can charge me

lock me up

I will be at peace

How so?

I finally met my true self

Look at my eyes detective

I did not kill my father

Do your searching

Do your investigation

but don't forget to add to all that lot

what you see in my eyes

you are a good person detective

I'm glad we met

I do have a favorite client

Therapy is all about connection

My connection with her feels
like it started before we even met

through her longing

she helped me to embrace
my own wound and my own grief

my lost child, whom I never talk about

every wound is an unfinished business

until they're processed deeply, truly

You know how they say things
are connected in mysterious ways

ways we don't know of

we may never understand

One thing I know though

the more we can connect to this world

with fullness with our whole being

the more we shine

Long,

long, long, long

think of a corridor

Step by step, step by step

A strike that I went to

from myself,

and from you

the most beautiful things
that happened to me

from my mind

from my thoughts

You have never existed anyway

Slowly,

slowly, slowly

slowly

think I'm gone

Heavy,

heavy, heavy, heavy

while decreasing my load

from your shoulder

from your chest

Remaining behind

the most beautiful days

from my love,

from my life

you have never existed anyway

you have never existed anyway