Mario, Kike y David (2016) - full transcript

MARIO, KIKE AND DAVID

Hi, how are you?

Hi.
I'm cold.

Is it cold outside?
Come in.

I haven't been outside all day.

- I'm Mario.
- I'm Kike.

Fancy a drink?

- Okay, a beer.
- Okay.

Perfect.

Make yourself at home.

There's only one.
Shall we share it?



Yeah.

Nice flat.
Do you live alone?

I live alone.

You're from the south?
- Yeah.

Whereabouts?

Seville.

I'll get toilet roll.

That was good, eh?

We should do it again.

Now?

Or some other time.

So, you're Mario...

You don't look like a Mario.
- No? Why is that?

You look like a Pablo.



Or a Nacho.
Nacho.

- Do I remind you of some Nacho?
- I don't know.

When I saw your profile photo
you looked like a Nacho.

Who do I look like?

Well I'm practical, mate.

You look like
the name you put on your profile.

"Hornystraightguynow".

And you look
like a straight guy, mate.

But if you're using that app,
it's because you're gay.

Or "bi".

Not straight.

Let me explain, "Passive33".

If you put "bi",
people don't latch on.

It only turns on straight guys,
like me.

How daft!

Are you really bi?

- You gays don't believe in bisexuals.
- I do, mate.

I'm bi.

But people lie on their profiles,
like you, you're not straight.

Sure, we're both bi,
camping it up for a bit.

You got a girl?

Not right now, no.

We broke up a few months ago and...

Listen, I have to go, mate.

All right, well...
See you soon.

Whenever you like.

I'm unemployed right now,
so I have time.

Weekends work better for me.

Okay.

Listen, Mario, this was great.

I felt really comfortable with you.
Sex and otherwise.

- Me too.
- Yeah?

- See you later.
- See you.

30th MARCH

- Hi.
- Hi.

I'm prepared today.

How thoughtful.

- What was your name?
- "Hornyhotstraight-biguy".

But you can call me Kike.

Very good.

All right, rest.

I could fall asleep, you know.

How's it going with the girls?

Bad, mate.

No girls, no boys either.

You're the last person I've been with.

- So, you're being faithful to me.
- Yeah.

Didn't you tell me
you'd not long broken up with a girl?

Yeah.

Just before Christmas.

- Did she know you're bi?
- No.

No.

I cheated on her
and then I felt guilty.

And it all went down the drain.
- Yep.

It was the same with my ex.

I had a girlfriend all my life

and when I told her I was bi,
she took it...

Not so much her,
but my parents...

My father-in-law...

My brother-in-law wanted to hit me.

If you'd told them you were gay
they'd have been more understanding.

They'd have said,
"You poor thing, in the closet."

Like one of my mates,

married with kids,
said he was gay

and everyone accepted it.

Now he's his wife's best friend.

Yeah, but I'm bi.

- And I'd like people to understand...
- Yeah, Kike, but...

you can't go sleeping with a girl,
and cheat on her with a boy,

just because you're bi.

It's just like cheating with a girl.

I won't cheat on my next girlfriend,
that's for sure.

That's why...

I'm through with girls.

It's easier with boys.

Not for me.

Well with the sex, yeah,
I'm the same with guys and girls, but...

I only fall in love with girls,
you know?

With a boy,
it's rare for it to go beyond a shag.

But are you bi or a closet gay?

I'm bi, mate.

Half in the closet.

Some of my friends know,
my family...

They caught me doing it
with my neighbour.

- No way!
- Yeah.

The worst moment of my life.

And what about you?

Everyone thinks I'm gay.

They don't understand bisexuality

and I've got used to the gay life.

It's better for meeting people.

So then, no girls?

What I'm saying is,

if it happens, fine,
but I won't try to get off with them

or go on at them for a shag.

I'm lucky though.

I have a regular fuckbuddy.
- Right...

She's older and married.

But she knows what she wants
and fucks who she wants.

- And is she good?
- Yeah.

She's over 40,
but she's really good.

If the situation arises, fine,
but I'm not going to try too hard.

It's easier with boys.

Until it starts to get serious.

Then, at least for me...
- Have you had a boyfriend?

I was with a boy for six months.

But he wanted an open relationship.

And I'm just a bit more jealous.

No, an open relationship...

I couldn't do it.

Do you like threesomes?

With a boy and a girl,
not really.

I prefer not to mix, and you?

I do, yeah.

I've only done it once,
and the girl wanted us both to herself.

She wouldn't let you play
and fucked it up for you?

I had threesomes with my boyfriend.

And once,
almost, with two girls.

But with a boy and a girl,
no, never.

You could suggest it to your fuckbuddy.

Are you being serious?

23rd APRIL

Hi.

Hi.

Come on in.

Where is she?

She isn't coming, she bailed.
Last minute.

She's just messaged me.
- How come?

No idea,
she'll be with her husband.

She might have turned faithful.
- So...

It's just you and me.
- Yep.

I'm so comfortable with you alone.

So now my girl is loyal.

This will be the end
of my heterosexuality.

- Isn't being loyal the normal thing?
- Come on!

We all say that,
but it's not that easy.

We want something serious,
but then we fuck it up.

Well I'm going to try
to go serious with a girl.

Have a life as a couple,
have a kid...

If she understands being bi,
fucking great,

but just in case,
best not to tell her.

But this normal life thing,
you can have it with a boy, too.

Yeah, but you can't.
It's not the same, Kike.

And I'm over hook-ups.

I'll be loyal to my next girlfriend,
and I'll forget about guys.

Well I know someone
who's going to have a tough time.

"Passive33".

You bastard.

9th MAY

Hey.
What a surprise!

- Am I interrupting?
- No, come in.

- Listen...
- I've not seen you in a month.

Sorry for calling at this time,
but I wanted to see you.

What's a guy like you doing here,
on a Wednesday?

I was at a work dinner and...

I'm a bit drunk.

A bit drunk,
and a bit funny, aren't you?

No, I was passing by
and I said to myself,

"Kike lives round here,
I'll go and visit him."

I'm glad.

- Me too.
- You too?

Mario.

- Morning.
- Good morning.

I have to go soon,
but you can stay if you like.

- What time is it?
- 11 o'clock.

Jesus, it's late.

I asked if you had work today,
last night, to set the alarm.

You said, "I don't care."

I work in a restaurant now,
and I start at 12, so I have to go.

Don't worry.
I'll make something up.

I really liked sleeping with you.

The first time.
- Yeah.

Our first time.

- And we didn't have sex.
- Fuck, what a disaster.

No, we didn't.
You fell asleep.

So, you owe me a shag.

Okay.

Do you want to shower?

Mario, do you want to shower?

Yeah.

This is the first time
I've seen you outdoors.

Yeah, true.

One day we could go to the cinema,
or eat out, or something.

Yeah.

Just having sex isn't...

I'm not imagining
some fairy tale between us.

But, you know,
doing things as mates...

Don't worry, Kike.

You and I will do things together.
- Yeah?

27th MAY

- Hi, how are you?
- Hi.

Really hot.

I'm Giorgio.
- Kike. Come in.

- Thanks.
- I've not left the house all day.

Oh yeah?

The other day I didn't tell you,

I haven't called you in so long
because I've started seeing a girl,

a great girl.

And, well,
I think I'll go steady with her.

That's why I stopped calling you.

And the other day,
a bit drunk, I thought...

I wanted to say goodbye.

I went to yours thinking
it was the last time I'd see you,

and more than that,
you were the last boy.

If it goes well with Paloma,
I'm sorry, but I won't call you again.

And if it goes badly?

We'll see, Kike, we'll see.

28th JUNE

She's quite...
She says we don't do anything.

- Quite annoyed?
- Yeah, a little.

That's how it is.

Wait a... Mario!

Hi.

Kike, mate!

How are you?

Good, good.
This is my girlfriend, Paloma.

- Hi.
- Hi, my pleasure.

- This is Kike, a friend.
- Nice to meet you.

This is Julián, Paloma.
Julían, Mario.

Not Mario, David!

- David, yeah.
- Sorry, it's been ages...

How's it going?

Good.

We've come into town
to buy some things for the house.

And we'll watch the parade.

Yeah, we will if we have time.

We're taking part
in the demonstration

and we're running a little late, so...

Good seeing you.
- Yeah.

I'll hopefully see you soon.
- See you.

All right, bye guys.
- See you later.

Handsome, aren't they?

Yeah, I think so.

Are they gay?

Yeah.

How do you know them?

They're Susana's friends,
we've met a few times.

Look how many flags there are!

- Let's take a selfie.
- All right.

Whisky!

Let's do a "periscope".

Come on.
- Okay.

Right, I'll film you.

Is it live?

Julián, horizontal please.
S'il vous plaît.

It just so happens

that I've not heard from Mario
in over a month,

and now I meet him here

with his girlfriend.

Kike's really handsome, isn't he?

I imagine so.

Imagine, no, he's really hot.

He really turns me on.

David, would you like to have a threesome?

Are you being serious?

Yeah.

I don't know.

I don't think the guy is all that gay.

He wasn't very gay.

Or at least not totally gay,

because I think he liked us both.

I don't know.

What do you think?

Do you fancy trying new things, David?

Or not so new, Mario?

Since this is how it is,

we've come prepared

to have a good time, enjoy ourselves,
drink a little and party!

MARIO, KIKE AND DAVID

FOR SOCIAL EQUALITY
FOR LESBIANS, GAYS, BISEXUALS AND TRANS

THERE WILL NEVER BE
A DAY OF STRAIGHT PRIDE

BISEXUALITY
IS THE MOST NATURAL THING

Thanks.

BISEXUALITY
IS THE MOST NATURAL THING

Subtitles: Bbo Subtitulado