Marie-Francine (2017) - full transcript

MARIE-FRANCINE

Marie-Francine, it's your man!

In here.

- You good?
- Great and you?

We're celebrating Jean-Noël's PhD.

- I'm glad you came. Been a while.
- True.

How are you, Emmanuel?

Let's talk, Marie-Francine.

- At home.
- No, without the girls.

They're visiting your mom.

- You took them to the station today.
- True.



Potato chip crumbs?

Let's take a walk.

It's pouring. To talk about what?

Nothing serious?

All right then.

Tell me.

I'm in love.

I fell in love.

I tried to resist
but I can't turn back.

No one knows yet.

Except your parents.

My parents?

Since they know you best.
Most. Longest.

They knew at lunch last Sunday?



Yes.

That's why they were nice.

I told them Saturday after tennis.

You manage to play?

She's 32. I must keep fit!

I mean...

Her name is Caroline.

You'll meet sooner or later.

She thinks you're really cute.

She saw me?

Your picture. At the house.

For my massage therapy
after my ski accident.

Health care, like you.

I'm a research scientist.

Wait... wait for me!

You gave me two invaluable daughters.

Leave me alone!

I parked nearby!
Don't take the metro!

Screw off!

Marie-Francine?

Yes, my love.

I did it. It's over.

No, I'm alone.

Yes, a few minutes ago.

It wasn't easy.

Baby-boo was very brave.

How you shocked our guests yesterday!

Arnaud sat you down
and you fell into a coma.

We laughed so hard!

Thibault won't be back from Berlin
till June 23rd.

Two months to get on your feet
and, I hope,

to get your little hubby back.

And for laundry or a chat,
ding-dong, we're home.

The throne.
Squat squat, but clean clean.

The neighbors offered 600-700.
Is 300 okay?

It's not bad!

Are you not well?

I'm fine...

Look.

Emmanuel?

Aymeric!

- How are you?
- Fine.

I work in Blois now.

In Paris on weekends.

I'm good... And you?

Great.

- I thought you had two.
- Two what?

Two daughters.

I only have two.
The one with the hat...

isn't my daughter.

A friend?

She's the girls' friend now,
but my girlfriend.

Oh shit!

- And Marie-Francine?
- Over.

Oh shit.

- You left her?
- No, she left me.

It was her choice.

Now I'm with Caroline.
Caro.

I never expected this.

It's been so easy.
It's fine with the girls.

- Where does she live?
- Who?

Marie-Francine.

She's looking for a place.

For the time being,
she found a room nearby.

A hotel room?

No, a maid's room.

The girls told me.
She won't see or talk to me.

I don't get it.

It's dumb.
We could stay friends.

I'd forgotten flat bellies exist.
Not fat. Concave!

Flat even when sitting.

Isn't that tops?

Aymeric!

How do I look?

Nice. Very nice.

Dad!

It's Mom.
She wants to go get her stuff.

- Okay?
- Yes, she can take her time.

Hugs and kisses to her!

Hugs and kisses...

Hugs and kisses!

- What's this?
- My birth certificate, and my kids'.

Let me see.

And the orange file?

My last three tax returns.
Let's wait for Mr. Jousse.

Did you get her pay slips?

October 2015 is missing.

Isn't this it?

Excuse me.

I didn't introduce Romain,
my tenacious junior-high intern.

Your papers and pay slips are fine.

But I need two guarantees,

Mrs. Doublet.

Two?

Even with 10 years on the job,
it's the rule.

I can get my parents, I think.
Otherwise...

No siblings?

A sister, but she said
this year would be difficult.

Yes... I don't know...

Girlfriend? Colleague?

And your husband?

You're on good terms?

No, I wouldn't want that.

You want the apartment?

Yes.

So ask your husband.

Yes... you have no choice.

I got it... I understand.

When you began working there,
you didn't smoke. Still don't?

Very good.

Have you noticed in your stool

little golden-colored filaments?

Brownish gold?

I don't know. I don't look.

But I'll look next time.

Why are we worrying about this
only now?

I agree.
It should have been ages ago.

The asbestos dates
from the time of construction.

The entire left wing
will be condemned.

Don't worry.
You're not the only one to leave.

I assume they'll find you new jobs.

This is about your health.

Nothing more valuable, right?

So the building must be evacuated
by the 16th.

I imagine you've already been told.

Damn!

They're totally...

Did you see a yellow notebook?

- Like this?
- Yes!

Thank you.

Have a nice day.

He's very cute,

a foot taller than me,
great kisser...

In fact, Octave twirled his tongue,
all mushy, but this one...

he darts his tongue, stops,
starts again differently.

It's magical, amazing!

- Honey...
- One kiss and right away...

I'm not your pal, Clémence.

We want to get married.
We talk about it!

Wait a little.
It's only been six days.

Excuse me,
your company vouchers expired.

Ten days ago.

We don't take checks.
Cash or credit.

I forgot my card.
No cash, nothing.

Wait, I'm sending...

I'll run home and back.

- I'll put him on.
- Your boyfriend?

No, Dad.
He's up in the apartment.

We're downstairs having chinky...

Excuse me, Chinese.

With Clémence.
I didn't bring my card.

She told you.

By text. It's why he called.

Thanks, see you in a sec.

He comes home every lunch
for a quickie.

A what?

A quickie!

What's that?

For a quickie!

For once I was eating at home.

- You're splitting?
- I have class.

Mom, see you Sunday.

See you tonight.

She's grown up.

For the move on Saturday,
can we say noonish instead of 8?

I'm not moving.

You got my guarantee?

I shouldn't have said
I was laid off.

I say tell the truth!

I saw.

- Marie-Noëlle will let you stay.
- Thibault's back from Berlin.

And Thotho and Marion?

In Nouméa. Two years now.

And your girlfriend
with the mustache?

- Dominique.
- Yeah, her.

I forgot, sorry.

Your parents?
Why not ask, in the meantime?

I already did.

This morning.

And?

For me, a computer in bed
is unbearable.

Less noisy than TV!

We'll talk about it tomorrow.

She can have this bed
and I'll take the living room.

It's temporary.

But Tuesday night is
Secrets of History.

The host Stéphane Bern
seemed tired.

He works a lot.

What did you say?

I said he works a lot.

He should allow himself
some time off.

I could see him with Marie-Francine.

He's not married.
They both like reading.

He must have space for the girls.

A delivery man is coming
tomorrow morning.

- More internet crap?
- Not at all.

Invisible flies that hatch
every five days and eat moths.

Non-toxic and odorless.

Like I said, total crap.

Goodnight.

Goodniiiight.

Flaubert recited
A Sentimental Education here.

We can still hear him.

She said 4 o'clock. It's 4:11.

Speak of the devil.

Hello, honey.

I don't know what's in here.
It's heavy.

I wanted to be here, but I'm off.

Balzac Museum in 20 minutes.

See you tonight.

Mom will help you settle in.

My big girl.

- I'll go and get settled.
- Wait...

So honey... how can I put it?

Dad and I thought it over.

He snores really loud.
My computer's not allowed.

In the twins' room he's unable.
No cable.

Don't throw a fit
if you sleep here a bit.

After the war,
there were 10 people to a room!

So there's worse.

I'm not at all upset. I understand.

Look what I found.
Your pajama holder.

Remember?
Marie-Noëlle had a pink one.

We'll stand together with Baby.

Know what I got for your snack?

Guess!

Two chocolate eggs, just for you!
Two!

For you it's swell.
Too bad for Marie-Noëlle.

That's Marie-Francine for you.

She left the cap off the toothpaste.

It dries and nothing comes out.

Annick, tell her tomorrow.

Dammit! It's not hard!

I see why Emmanuel
sometimes lost his patience.

Goodnight.

Goodniiiight.

Marie-Francine!

No, please.

What's wrong?

I'm 50.

We've been looking for an hour!

Hello, sir.

What are you doing?

I'm reading.

I'm reading
an interesting science book.

Tell us next time, child,
so we don't look all over.

Annick! We're here!

I'm writing one myself.

Last days of Field Marshall
de Lattre de Tassigny.

Historical,
but slightly fictionalized.

Pierrick! Look who I found!

Say hi to Solange and Michel!

I didn't see you.

Hi, Michel.

Which one are you?

Marie-Noëlle's the other.

God, how we mixed you up!

So?
Visiting the old folk?

More than visiting.

Squatting. It's been two weeks.
And we love it.

We're thrilled.

Left your little hubby?

No, he left me.

It's you who left, honey.

How old are you now?

I bounced her on my knees!
I know!

De Gaulle vs. Mitterrand,
Mom in the hospital... 50!

50, and at Mom and Dad's!

You laugh,
but it almost happened to Armelle.

She found a nice guy in extremis.

She looked like you.
A total mess...

One Sunday at the country house,

he just appeared, under her eyes.

In his bermuda shorts.

So you see? Anyone can hope!

We're off.
Marie-Francine, be brave!

Come on...

rise and shine!

It's 10:30.

We've been up since 7.

Time to get up.

Not to be a party-poop,

but reading won't get you work.

And you know my love of literature.
I'm always reading.

Reading and writing.

This week's goings-on.

Paris is the gem of the world.
Enjoy it, honey!

The cork museum is nearby.
Know it?

No, I sure don't.

Annick Legay?

- What is it?
- No idea, but it's heavy.

Put it down.

Mrs. Legay...

Is the door open for a reason?

We'll be going.

Sir...

Goodbye, ladies, ma'am...

Goodbye, gentlemen.

- What is it?
- For you, honey!

But I may borrow it.

A tanning bed! You're pale.

- Mom!
- Trust me.

No tan line.

Not in the living room!

No, on the balcony!

I went to the ticket booth.
Got a seat.

And a Saturday night!

Denise and Jean-Paul went twice.
Great show!

A jump seat, but a great view.

For who?

For you, honey.

Les Misérables! Amazing!

Amazing.

Hasn't aged a bit.

- No?
- For sure!

I can meet the research director
any time.

Not at all.

No, it was a lay-off
for sanitary reasons.

- There was like no misconduct.
- Don't say "like".

There was no misconduct, sorry.

Call Mr. Prieur. He'll confirm it.

Great then. We'll talk next week.

Thanks, you too.

Don't correct me
when I'm on the phone!

Don't get upset, honey.

Sorry, I opened it.
I thought it was for me.

The research center in Monaco
already hired.

I went to the lab nearby
to see if they need someone.

Not for the time being.

Tomorrow I'll ask at the lab
near the butcher.

Mom.

I already told you.
That's not my job.

I do stem-cell research.
Gene mutations.

Opening 30 jars of shit a day
is not what I want.

There's more to it.

Yeah, there's piss too.

- Those things must be done.
- Without me.

We've found something great for you.

Really?

The investment isn't too prohibitive
for us and Marie-Noëlle.

Rapid growth within six months.

What would you say
to a local e-cigarette store?

Are you kidding?

Not at all.

I have two interviews next week.

Well, in the meantime...

If you ask me,

if you ask us,
you have the skill set.

You're personable.
You speak English, German, Greek.

The Eiffel Tower is nearby!

It's like working in a lab.

You have to be precise.
There are tubes.

Liquid to put in tiny holes.
Mom even found a name!

Vaporetto.

In two words.

"Vaporette... Oh!"

Cute, right?

Sorry to bother you.

Where's the Maison de la Radio?

It's very easy.
About 10-12 minutes by foot.

Take the second right.
Careful, the first is a dead end.

The second right,
then take the stairs...

See? Customers!

I said the area needed a vape shop!

Marie-Francine looks like a pro!

We know what's next.

You're too picky. And negative!

Try harder.

We don't want to get rid of you,
but it's easier as a couple.

- Yes, I know.
- At our age.

Slight difference.

Not that slight...

A depressed degenerate,
an alcoholic and a fag.

I won't move in with them for you!

He wasn't that alcoholic.

He drank three bottles of wine.

Two and a half.

Half your Armagnac,
and two beers before he left!

If that's not alcoholic...

If he's happy with you,
he'll drink less.

Thierry was my favorite of the three.
Handsome boy!

Really? He's red
with yellow fingers and no appetite!

Normal his wife left.

It happens to good folk.

Thanks.

We reached out to everyone we know.

Otherwise, try farmers.
They're all over TV.

Talk about red!
In and out, in and out, all day long.

Without lotion, vessels suffer.

What is this?

You never know who you meet online.

I can go look
without saying it's for you.

You don't need to be in profile
for a profile pic.

- No glasses.
- Keep them.

Close your coat. No, open it.

Think of Ryan Gosling
on a motorcycle.

Who?

Smile!

Yuck! Be normal.

Normal, but attractive.

Fine. Don't move.

Are you impish,
romantic or possessive?

Put romantic. It can't hurt.

- Now your screen name.
- What for?

You can't put "Marie-Francine".

Why not?

It's not glamourous.

Use my eBay name.

Omelet007.

Like a James Bond girl
who can cook an egg.

Just put me straight onto eBay.

My daughter, barely used,
real hair... 50 euros.

100 with gold watch.

And the broken electric knife.

Even at a pack a day,
you save 186 a month.

That's 1,800 in a year.

Vacation at the beach for two.

As for refills, we can now offer you

37 different flavors.

Whereas cigarettes
are menthol or nothing.

Pleasant on the palate.

I'm sure.

- So how do you fill it?
- It's easy.

Unscrew the cigarette.

Like this.

Open the cap.

This one's a little hard.

Don't swallow it. Bad aftertaste.

Just for a few days.

Then pour the product in.

Into the e-cigarette's
refillable tank.

Excuse me.

First time in my eyes.

I'll think it over...

Goodbye.

Hello.

Excuse me, I'm here to see
your electronic cigarettes.

Any good?

Yes, very.

Have you tried?

Never.

You prefer the real thing.

- No idea. My first cigarette ever.
- Really?

Nice.

Sure it's nice. But I'd like to quit.

Can you show me one?

I'll come back.
I work next door.

I've smoked for 30 years.
What's another day?

At the point I'm at...

Wait, wait.

I'm sorry. You have...

several models.

This is the simplest.

So you...

unscrew the top...

Then you pour into the tank.

But never use your mouth.
I just swallowed some.

It's gross.

Or rub your eyes
if it's on your fingers.

It's very painful, just awful.

I can imagine.

How do the refills work?
Different flavors?

To be honest, they're all chemical.

I still want to try.

I know people who quit with it.

Are you sure?

One cigarette and two refills.

Don't do it to make me happy.

No...
Especially since I see it doesn't.

It does.

It really does.

49 euros.

No bag, no receipt.

Just a trash bin.

I see you like cereal bars!

- My lunch.
- Every day?

Almost.

Except today, I forgot to eat.

It's important to feed yourself.

It's very important.
It helps you get through the day.

To talk crap.
I didn't mean that.

Excuse me.

What is it? What's wrong?

I'm fine.
I'm just not used to smoking.

I'll be fine. I already am.

Are you sure?

I'm really fine.

I don't want to hear an ambulance.

I'm afraid...

Anaïs...

Put them back down...
Miguel! You left no smudge.

Smudge of what?

- Brown stuff.
- I never do.

Screw your brown smudges.

You don't own this place, pal.

I'm not your pal.

And if I owned it,

you'd never see frozen fish
on square plates.

At least you got a fan club.
Right, Nadège?

What's that?

- Practicing in a bowl? How sad!
- Enough.

Go hit on customers.

You're right.

Sexy MILFs at table 14.
Five of them.

Come here, Helio.

You can smoke, ma'am.

It's from Miguel.

- Who's Miguel?
- My...

My chef.
He works next door.

He bought an e-cigarette
last week.

Now I see.
I remember him well.

What is it?

Lamb with coriander, Thai rice,
glazed baby carrots.

It's not on the menu.

How kind.

Very kind.

Thank him for me.

Won't you taste it?

Now?

To know if it's good.
To reassure us.

It's very good.

Great. I'll tell him.

I have to get back to work.

Goodbye.

Hear Mom's getting married?

- With who?
- Sandrine!

Oh yeah.

- She didn't tell me.
- You'll come?

If I'm invited.

Two white gowns?

I don't know. I saw two little vests.

Identical.

Well, small for Mom,
XXL for Sandrine.

- Why didn't you two marry?
- I don't know.

- Did you love her?
- Sure.

- Is Sandrine still nice to you?
- Very.

I start at 6.
I'm going to be late.

Not too heavy?

Put it in the fridge.
Cook, but don't make Granny clean up.

See you tomorrow?

Your toast!

Can't you smell it's burning?
Take it out!

What is this toaster
that doesn't stop?

For Dad's Sunday croissants.
They don't fit in the others.

I found it on eBay. 3 euros 80.

And 35 euros in shipping.

Marie-Francine, it's burning!

If you keep it up,
there won't be any bread left!

You should try whole grain.

Yes!

When we become...

sedentary...

Since we started,
it comes out like butter.

You can always return it.

I like it.

I'm keeping it. Here, in my pocket.

But I'll need the bowl back
if you want more.

- I only have one.
- No, no...

You cook all day long.

But it's not my menu.
It's no fun.

Baby artichokes.

Like them?

You're about to have a customer.

I'll go.

If you can sell anything to this one,

I'll return your bowl.
- I'm lousy at that.

Only if you hide.

Just one thing.

Wasn't this the Scrabble Shop?

Yes.

- That's right.
- I win.

My wife says no.

We've managed to evolve.

We now sell e-cigarettes.

Perfect for playing Scrabble.

It helps you concentrate.

I play a lot.

- Very pleasant on the palate.
- Very!

As for refills,

we now offer thirty...

Thirty-seven flavors.

Don't tire yourself.
I need the Galatée 410.

The large model.

Compatible
with the Nomad Fast charger.

This one.

I need two.
One for Paris, one for the country.

And one box
of "Dutch Tobacco" refills.

And a travel case.

Good... excellent.

So that will be...

172 euros.

I know. I've come by before.

Three times.

Your code.

By the way,

that tall, depressed woman
no longer works here?

No, it's me now.

I'm not surprised.

- Goodbye, sir.
- Thank you.

What's your name,
tall depressed woman?

Marie.

Pretty.

It's standard.

I'm Miguel.

Delivery tomorrow at 12:10.

"Life's a bowl of cherries",
remember?

I'm old.

That's great!

Hi, honey.

Seen the time?

What time is it?

No idea. You have a watch.

Mom bought vols-au-vent for dinner.

Reheat yours.
Every man for himself.

French law forbids you
from closing after 7 pm.

Yes, we inquired.

I don't want to get in trouble.

I'm not 14 years old.

You're acting 14.
Look at you with your hood.

Coming, Anaïs?

Miguel.

My lighter.

I'll keep it.

What'll you put in her bowl today?

- I'm still hesitating.
- Between what?

Chicken curry or lamb on fresh peas.
I thought about it all night.

You're a girl, sort of...

- Your choice?
- Chicken.

Right away.

Without even thinking.

It sucks.

If you had a place,
you could make a full meal.

I'm waiting to hear.

I should have it by next week.
I'm getting fed up.

3 months is enough.

What will you tell her?

The truth.

How your wife left you
for a client from your restaurant?

How you're broke

and live with your parents
in a janitor's flat?

With your son in your bed
on weekends?

Come on... you're kidding.

What?

She'll run the hell away!

Understandably so!

Miguel!

19 euros 40.

And 20.

- For the restaurant.
- My treat.

It sucks. I can't have friends over.

Really? Why?

My wife had
a serious horse-riding accident.

She's...

a vegetable.

I mean, no more feelings, nothing.

But she's there.

Poor you! I mean poor her.

Yeah, tough break.

She did competitions?

- For?
- Horse-riding.

Yes!

Medals and cups all over the house.

A real pain to clean.

Maybe with cotton swabs?

For?

Just an idea...
Granny used them on the silver.

Practical for small holes.

Been long?

Since I did the silver?

That she's a veg... like that.

Years, but now a matter of days.

Really?

If everything goes well,
I'll know next Friday.

Know what?

If they'll take her in a center.
Because...

She doesn't speak.
She doesn't recognize me.

That's so hard.

I have a husband too.

Really?

- Healthy, but he left me.
- Great!

It's great that he's healthy.

I'm in a delicate situation,

obviously nothing compared to yours.

At one point, I had little choice.

It's a bit strange, but I came back
to live with my parents.

No way!

It's unusual.

They're barely ever home.

They spend most of the year
in the south.

Like lots of old people.

- In Menton.
- That's in the south.

Menton, yes.

Okay well... I'm going this way.

Me, that way.

- Have fun cooking.
- You too.

Your dinner.

Your thyme.

My number.

Leave a message
to tell me how dinner was.

- If it was good.
- Even if it wasn't.

- Promise?
- Yes.

Where's the lemon
from my bedside?

In the salad, why?

Good evening.

Where did you put the trash?

I felt inspired.

I didn't want to lose it.

You've spoiled it!

You've been giggling for an hour.
I have school.

Marie-Noëlle and I are talking shop.

Yeah, right... Goodnight.

How are you?

Did you eat?

Helio made a ham gratin.

I'm not hungry.

Is he asleep?

Of course.
He's been asleep two hours.

I ironed your jeans.

Crease down the middle.

Goodnight.

Not asleep?

I was waiting for you.

See the time?

Not my fault if you're late.

It was a busy night.

Put this on.

Fabio left Master Chef.

Too bad. He was the best.

- Brush your teeth.
- Screw you!

- You drank?
- Two glasses.

It stinks!

Look who's talking!

What a stench!

Don't, Helio!

You'll wake them up!

Helio, keep it down!

Expecting a message?

I'm setting my alarm.

Yeah, right.

Come on, lights off.

- That's the secret.
- Really?

Even I do it.

When I'm nice, he ignores me.

The old snob with her cart!

20-year affair with the butcher.

She can't get enough!
Oh my God!

Every day she buys ham.

Then it's wham-bam, thank you, ma'am.

Says who?

Because the butcher
is my best friend's uncle.

We've known the deal for ages.

Look. She got pounded.
All happy, all pink!

It's too hilarious.

Pulling her cart
after pulling on his T-bone!

I'm dying!

Look, Marie.
God damn!

For 20 years. Afternoons.

That's nonsense!

I swear, Marie-Noëlle.

Everyone knows but us.

That explains her tanning bed.

I'll call you back.

Why are you staring at me?

Is something wrong?

Not at all.

Hair a mess?

You're fine.

Honey, excuse me.

I'm spoiling the surprise,
it's big news.

Dad said to wait, but I can't!

Emmanuel came by after tennis.
He's available again.

His Caroline left him.

It's about time!

See?
Thank God you didn't get a divorce!

You deserve it.

I bought mini-sausages to celebrate!

I'm off.

Here we are.

I'm here.

Okay...

Yep.

Too bad my parents are in town.

They're back from Menton?

Yes, exceptionally.
Last night, very late.

I have to go work, anyway.

Oh yeah.

Yeah.

My day's not over.

I'll walk you there.

Where is she? I'm hungry!

In 55 minutes, Secrets of History.

It's a pain for me too.

Bidding for my ice-cream maker
starts at 9 pm.

When will Emmanuel take her back?

- Pierrick!
- What?

Let her play hard to get.

I found her reaction odd.

But I know her like a book.

Deep down she's thrilled.

What do we do?

Forget about her, let's eat.

Okie-dokie.

We were looking all over.
The crabs never came.

I'm kidding!

How funny!

Come on.

Soup's on.

Goddamn crabs.

I'd rather go back with you.

What a drag.

See you tomorrow.

See? Just like I said.

He swept her off her feet!

I'm also thrilled
my son-in-law is back.

But she can spare us Nana Mouskouri.

When he gave me your CV
and I saw "Marie-Francine",

I thought "Marie-Francine",

there aren't that many!

Thanks for coming.
My flight's in two hours.

Too dummy not to meet.

Dumb.

I've made no progress.

- Me neither.
- Don't say that.

Your English is the only area

where we may have a problem.

Otherwise you're a great candidate.

I must say
I've met five other people for the job.

Now you know.

Our little team was such fun.

God how we laughed!

Guy Lunier!

Good afternoon, ma'am.

I'd like information
about these famous e-cigarettes.

Yes, of course.

Are you a smoker?

Yes, ma'am, I smoke. Too much!

Far too much, alas.

How many a day?

A pack.

That's right.

One pack, 40 cigarettes.

It's usually 20.

Yes, you're right. How silly of me!

Sorry, Marie-Francine, I can't.

I wanted to see you in secret,
surprise you, make you laugh.

I want you back.

Masseuse vamoosed?

Back with her ex.
10 days after wanting a baby.

She took everything.

No more Caroline.

Forgetting something?

I know, my wedding ring.
But with the disguise...

No, to ask me if I want to.

I'm asking you, now.

What's come to pass, Nanasse?

He said my skirt's not short enough.

And my ass is too big!

I don't understand you.

Honestly.

I'm very disappointed.

You know it's the 21st century?

The 21st century!

So what?

Live with the times.
These things happen.

Think it over.

I already have.

It's done.

Your purse, ma'am.

Shit!

Marie-Francine!
It's locked!

What is it?

Come home fast!

Why not unplug it?

It's even worse!

It shuts and she can't breathe.

It's been an hour.

Burning like a panini...

in the nude!

I couldn't call the firemen.

The buttons are on the inside?

Some inside, some outside.

There's a remote we can't find.

Just for a brown butt...

High price to pay.

- What?
- Nothing.

Promise me
you're not with firemen!

- Mom, it's me.
- Who?

Marie-Francine!

I wanted Marie-Noëlle!

- She's buying bath towels in Troyes.
- I'll go back to work!

Don't go!
I have a 220V-resistor on my butt.

110 per cheek! I'm dying!

- I'm looking for the button.
- At my feet, dammit!

Hey, give me a break!

What are you doing?

To distract you!

You'll electrocute me!

Stop, you'll fry her!

The fan is on.

Like a dryer,
it has to cool down before opening.

O for "open", C for "closed".

It's about time!

I can easily give you
another 45 minutes!

Why the lousy mood?

Nothing. I'm fine.

Marie?

Marie, come here.

Does she have a big ass?

Sort of.

You see?

Don't say that!
Miguel and I can't calm her.

Xavier wants to fire her for it.

Her guy dumped her!

And her Granny died!

The Granny who raised her!

Come...

Is Nanasse out of her impasse?

He won't fire you. We spoke.

What happened to you?

- Product in your eyes again?
- Exactly.

I forgot it was on my fingers.

Mint. It stings.

Your customer seemed awful.

I'll say...

This is clean.

Just a sec.

Want to meet tonight?

11:15 isn't too late?

- What'll you do?
- No idea.

Get me a table and I'll wait.

No fun. I won't see you.

I don't like showing myself
to the customers.

I'm like a dog.
I hate being seen while I eat.

I have a croizy oidoia.

- What?
- My mom says "croizy oidoia".

"Crazy idea"
with a Portuguese accent.

She seems like fun.
More than mine.

In small doses.

- Fortunately I rarely see her.
- Oh yeah?

So, I have a croizy oidoia!

Not so much!
You need three more for table 12.

Who cares? They'll eat bread!

- Vincent, two sea breams.
- Yes, Chef!

- Three turbots!
- Yes, Chef!

Excuse me.

The receptionist/waiter will be back.

Want some champagne?

No thanks, we'll wait.

Champagne or something else.
Large choice.

We come here often.
7 years now.

They renovated. It's nice.

Christelle, Philippe...

Good evening.

Been married long?

Okay. We won't tell anyone.

18 years for us.

18 years of love.

- Isn't she beautiful?
- Very.

Yours isn't bad either...
Another style.

Very nice blouse, sweetie.

- Can I call you sweetie?
- Sure.

We're not old farts yet.

Any tats?

Excuse me?

Any tattoos?

You should, Marie.

It really doesn't hurt.
Christelle's is great but...

you need good eyes.

It's so hot in here.

Any lingerie underneath, Marie?

Yes.

Great.

Shall we?

Nicer upstairs.

- No need to...
- We can stay tender.

48.

Room 48. Fourth floor.

- Take your time.
- We'll get comfy.

See you...

See you.

48.

No, not the knives!

- I thought it was Mom.
- Why are you here?

I rented out our place on Airbnb.

Again?

Danes. Five of them.

Usually I stay with our friends
who are dentists.

Tonight their cousin popped up.
Ciao, Marie-Nono.

I got kicked out. What pains!

What time is it?

No idea. 2?

You didn't warn Mom and Dad.

- Where were you?
- A girlfriend.

His name?

He smells married.

You smell like cigarettes.
Give me one.

He's married.

But his wife is sick.

Drop him. How typical.

Smoking again?

I'm so annoyed.

I checked the house
when the Danes were out.

My ivory knives I had hidden...
in the dishwasher!

Shit, it's ivory, dammit!

Ivory, we know.
You told us at dinner

as I suffered from sun stroke!

3,000 a week on Airbnb is a choice.

Stop, Mom.

Shit, it's ivory, dammit!

Stop, you'll wake up Dad.

Where were you, so late?

With that messy hair and sneaky look?

Visiting a girlfriend.

It's not Emmanuel who took you
on the Ferris wheel?

He was preparing a surprise.

A great husband,
but you get involved in such...

Love is like a cigarette

It burns fast like a turbojet

Stings the eyes and makes you cry

And vanishes into the sky

You're all nuts!

I installed
the smoke detectors myself.

If it goes off,
deal with the gendarmes.

Goodnight.

Why not cook at home?

My oven broke.

- I'll pay for the electricity.
- It's not that.

I just stop by
and find you like at home.

Maybe you come Sundays
for wine, chicken and butter?

Are you crazy?

I bought all this.
Here's the receipt.

I need an oven for 20 minutes.

The blenders and deep fryers
are mine.

I never ask for anything.

I brought it
because you had nothing.

And you want 5 cents of electricity?

That's not at all what I meant.

It is. I understood perfectly well.

I steal wine on Sundays.

I put butter in my pockets
on the sly.

What world do you live in?

Count your chickens
instead of hitting on waitresses.

Xavier, look at me
and at your kitchen.

Tomorrow it'll be empty.

No pans, no sieves, no cook.

You can't do that!

You know me...
I don't need to be told twice.

You took my 7-iron?

It's in your golf bag
with the others.

Pull over. I'll check.

You made them yourself?

By myself, at home.

Not in here either?

Let's just go back home!

Told you so!

Yes, yes...

Mr. Schaeffer said he called

into an answering machine
and mentioned the time?

He did. But he was lying.

I understand the note
that he had now.

"Turn ahead twice at midnight".

Maybe she's busy with her guest.

As far as I know, it's our home!

Shit!

Marie-Francine,

I don't know if it's you

or your new "friend",

who used the toilet today.

Anyway, your mother and I
noticed something small,

the size of my nail,

belonging to neither of us,
floating in our toilet.

Tell your friend

to check
before leaving the throne.

And...

if it's you, shame on you!

You go.

We're going to our Sunday night mass.

Will you join us?

As you wish.

We thought it'd be a nice change.

I won't go to mass.

With such adversity,
why believe in anything?

For once something good happened
and you ruined it!

I hid nothing.
I said someone was coming for tea.

You weren't drinking tea.

So what? I'm an adult.

I've been one for 30 years!

I'm free. Not a criminal.

You had to come for a club?
You have two bags!

And why open the door?
You could have left, or knocked!

I'll never see him again.

He won't answer.
You humiliated him.

He's 55 and ran off like a thief.

Use his place.

There's a handicapped person there,
or we would have!

You want me back with Emmanuel
because he got dumped.

I don't love him!
His parents, his brothers.

None of them ever even called me.

Not one. I ceased to exist.

Did you call them?

No, they should have.

I don't want to visit Paris
and museums.

I don't want to go see Les Miz alone!

I don't give a fuck!

My friend will never call

and all you can say,

all you find to say

is we didn't flush the toilet!

We didn't even use it!

You didn't flush, old fart!

He's your father!

Go to Sunday night mass, Dad.

Pray, take communion, eyes closed.

As kids we saw you
playing footsie with Denise.

For 40 years.

- In front of Mom?
- Show her respect!

She doesn't care as long
as she gets her afternoon ham.

Shut up!

I'll shut up.

And shove off.

I'm splitting.
Damn hypocrites...

The set of keys.

Here!

Enjoy mass!

- Open it!
- What do you want?

- Open the door.
- There's nothing.

Shut up and open it!

Open the cash register!

- 17.
- See?

Shut up!

25 euros for a tiny chocolate tart!

The keys from my jacket.

There's a light on in Marie's shop.

They must be screwing big time.

Fun Sunday for Miguel!

Beats watching The Bachelor.

He found his bachelorette.

No need to hand out roses!

You're too curious.

You'll see your boss tomorrow.

Come on.

Marie, my phone is in your bedroom.
See you tomorrow?

Marie-Francine

You're not with Miguel?

No answer. What the hell?

I'll call his place.

Does this hurt?

Hello, ma'am, it's Nadège.
Can you talk?

Yes, very good.

Tell him to call me.

Goodnight.

- She speaks?
- Who?

Miguel's wife.

Of course she does, why?

No... I thought she was a vegetable.

You're not well.
We'll drive you home.

Shit, my phone.

Here... call her.

- Who?
- The Virgin Mary!

No, your sister!

No, Mom, just a bump on her forehead.

Out like a light.
I gave her two sleeping pills.

You went overboard yesterday.

Going into the bedroom...

I didn't say it was you.

Wait, a customer!

We're closed!

Closed for inventory!

No need to insist.

I didn't mean to run off.

Sorry for yesterday!

My wife had the end piece.
She recharged it before leaving.

- Here.
- Thanks.

Sorry for yesterday.

It wasn't right of us
to barge in unannounced.

We behaved...

I behaved poorly with Marie-Francine.

She left.

She's giving us the cold shoulder.

- You're not alone.
- I know.

We spoke to her husband...
ex-husband.

She sent him packing too.

In any case,

we understood
how much she cares for you.

Anyway...

at least she's alive!

Here.

Give her our keys.

I mean... her keys.

Tell her it's always her home.

Hold on.

Give this to her too.

It's important to her.

How are you?

I'm awful. I'll tell you later.

Nadège, I'm not coming today.
Or any day.

Xavier and I had a serious fight.

Keep my pots and pans.
It's easy. Replace me.

I'm out with the trash!

Don't be silly.

I'll hire you
when I find a nice place.

You know Marie got robbed
last night?

She's fine. They did nothing to her.

Really?

This morning?

She's working already?

Damn, your babe is Super Warrior!

She was groggy,
like me in the morning!

It'll be fine.

Marie, it's Nadège.

Don't take it out on Miguel.

Marie, open up.

Come on!

I have to go back. I'm replacing him.

Open up.

Pain in the ass!

Excuse me. Hello, ma'am...

I was knocking behind.
Marie isn't here?

Not today.

How funny.

I feel like we've met.

A long time ago.

A very long time.

I'm sure of it.

I know.
You taught junior high school.

- Vincennes Cooking Academy?
- I never worked.

How funny.

It'll come back.
You know the saleswoman?

She's my daughter.

Poor thing was robbed last night.

I chased them away.

I dropped her off at her sister's.
But she has no phone.

I'll give you her twin's number.

Is that yours?

What?

The plaid shopping cart.

Yes!

Okay.

Nothing.

Goodbye, ma'am.

SPACE TO RENT + APARTMENT

Sixth floor, no elevator.

Less attractive!

It's not in great shape.
That's why it's cheap.

Let me think.

Come on, I start work at 6!

Come for dinner please,
bring some cheese.

Hurry!

Shit!

I worked 5 years with him
and he wouldn't tell me.

Only after I saw both women
arm in arm buying pillows.

It's normal he didn't tell you.

She's not a vegetable.

He's such an idiot.
She's getting married!

- With who?
- Her girlfriend!

His restaurant was getting a star.

But his wife did everything,
waitressing, accounts...

She left and it went bust.

Bankruptcy, finding a job.

And he brought me along.
Classy guy.

He could answer.
I left 20 messages.

Are you blonde?
He has no phone!

And you shafted him at the shop.

- I what?
- Rejected him.

You're blonde, I didn't shift.
It was my sister at the shop.

Cool it, we're in a cop car.

I took YouYou's keys.
He's with his kids.

Keep a low profile.

I'm sorry.

- What about?
- Your mom.

I should have kept quiet.

Sorry.

I'm happy for her.
Since my Dad does the same...

Not with the butcher.

Sorry.

Not cooked. Deglazed.

Are you dumb? With vinegar!

And clean the chard.
I'm on my way.

All right... we're here.

Where?

Here you are.

- What is it?
- No idea.

I saw your parents too.

Yeah they're nice, but at times...
You saw my dad.

He has a huge mole!

I'd like to take my scissors...

Shit, it's him.

Yummy smell of Honey Puffs!

You're right. That's exactly it.

Shit... I left it on.

- I got it.
- What?

My new job.

Pipe down! We're sleeping!

I told you so. It's great.

- Let's celebrate.
- We'll wake your mom.

No, she doesn't sleep.

Mind letting us sleep?

Happy New Year

Marie-Francine!

Get up!

Get up in there!

Cork museum time!