Maid in Manhattan (2002) - full transcript

Subtitles by demonseye

Come on. Get your coat.
We gotta go.

- You have everything?
- Yes.

Hurry up, sweetie. We're late.

Ty. Today, papi.

You're killing me, Ty.
Right now, you're killing mommy.

- Okay, let's go.
- It's not my fault, mom.

You wanna do
your speech for me?

Ty! Hello? That's better.

You know, you don't have
to listen to that 24 hours a day.

It's Simon and Garfunkel.



That's why I tell you to tie your shoes.
I know. I'm sorry. Oh, my God.

- You can't just turn them off, mom.
- I understand, baby. Come on.

- Be careful, there's a puddle.
- Why'd they break up?

- Who?
- Simon and Garfunkel.

You got me.
You can Google it at school.

Let's go.

Will I get in trouble
if I didn't give my speech?

Cause I'm not really feelin' it.

What do you mean, you're not feelin' it?
You've been working all summer on that speech.

- I can't wait to hear it.
- It's boring.

Not to me or to abuela
or to your dad.

I thought we were meeting him after.

No way. He's coming, and then
you guys are going camping. Remember?

He's gonna be late,
and then everyone will see.



Look, he knows what time it starts.
Don't worry, he'll be there.

- Hey, look at me.
- What?

- You got something on your face there.
- Where?

- Right there.
- Ma! Mom! Mom, no! Stop!

There it is. I got it!

- Hey, guys. How's it going?
- Hey, Ty.

What's up?
Oh! The speech thing is at 4:00.

I know. Come 'ere.
You got something on your face.

- Mom!
- What?

- Please.
- I'm sorry. Mr. Cool Guy.

I love you.

Have a good day.

- Morning, Marisa.
- What's up, Cora? How my diamonds doin'?

They're hanging with
your rubies and your emeralds.

Oh, I like the sound of that.

- Just made it, Marisa.
- I always do.

- Good morning, Marisa.
- What's up, Keef?

How's the weather?
Sunshine. That's nice.

Anything good on?

He opened the door for the paper.
The wife just push him out.

Ooh, that nasty butt first thing
in the morning, I'd kick 'im out too.

Oh, my God. Wait a minute. He's
one o' mine, the-the lactose intolerant.

I like how you name the people.

What do you call me
behind my back, I wonder.

Yeah. Can I get a robe to the
Charles Suite ASAP? Thank you.

I call you God because you see
everything and you still smile.

- I'm cool with that. I surely am.
- I'll see you later, Keef.

A Beresford maid is expedient.
A Beresford maid is thorough.

A Beresford maid serves with a smile.

And above all, a Beresford maid
strives to be invisible.

Maybe we can disappear
one day altogether.

You know what I just heard?

Christina?
History after the first.

Christina kitchen or
Christina assistant manager?

Assistant manager.
And you know what that means?

Yeah, it means somebody else is gonna
be bustin' my ass on the second.

Wrong. It means we're gonna
need a new assistant manager.

- Yo, Barb, we still on for happy hour?
- Uh-huh! Ten hours and counting.

Hey, Marisa, you here?

Can I finish getting dressed,
please? Thank you.

You're the one who keeps
talking about being a manager.

All is I'm saying is...
it could be you.

Gimme a break, all right?
They're not gonna make a maid a manager.

Why not? Today's a new day.
Anything's possible.

You know what I'm sayin'?

Friday morning, people!
Lots to do. Heads up.

Mr. Bextrum has an announcement
to make. Mr. Bextrum.

Christina Howard's promotion has created
a vacancy that we've decided to fill...

with in-house personnel.

- Perhaps one of our butlers.
- Excuse me, Mr. Bextrum, sir?

- Yes... Miss Kehoe?
- Can a maid apply?

Uh, well, technically, if an employee's been
here for three consecutive years,

he or, indeed, she,
is qualified to apply.

So, yes. Sure. Absolutely.
Why not? Anything is possible.

You hear that?
The man said anything's possible.

Yeah, I guess he did.

On to new business.

Mr. Radcliff is checking out of 709.
Mr. Greenwald is checking in.

He's back on the wagon,
so let's clear out the minibar.

Kanga CFO, Mr. Fukimoro,
is checking into 814.

Stock Evian, shampoo the rugs
and extra slippers for his guests.

Marisa, heads up
on the Madison Suite.

Housekeeping.

Mrs. Sage is arriving
with the children,

preferably after Mr. Sage's
girlfriend departs.

You son of a bitch!

Let's make sure it's
a smooth transition.

The Guedj sisters are back.
We'll track them on surveillance,

but do keep an eye on all bathrobes,
cutlery and light fixtures.

Sotheby's director, Caroline Lane,
has switched from the Four Seasons.

She requested a park view

and favors purple orchids
and lavender scents.

Assemblyman Chris Marshall
arrives today.

He's gearing up his campaign,

so his suite will be doubling
as a conference center,

with the liquor and coffee bars
turning over every four hours.

And he's bringing his large dog,
so we'll need proper accouterments.

And finally, Mr. Newman is back
in the Sherman Suite.

Careful, ladies,
he's a full Monty.

- I had no idea anyone was here.
- Don't worry about it, Mr. Monty.

No big deal.

- And I do mean... no big deal.
- No big deal.

Lavender!

- You're very creative, Marisa.
- Thank you, ma'am.

Since you have to leave at 3:00,
go find Lionel and have him sign off.

- Sir, I need you to sign off on the...
- Damn!

Oh, good Lord. Here, let me.

- Here you go.
- Thank you.

Oh, God. Your hand's bleeding.

Here. Squeeze tight.

Damn. He's checked in.

Quote, "Sentimental favorite
Chris Marshall

blah, blah, blah, blah, blah...

son of the late Senator Graham Marshall,
blah, blah, blah, blah, blah...

is expected to run for his father's
senatorial seat in the next election."

- End quote. That's it.
- Let me see that. Let me see it, Jerry.

- Come one, let me see it.
- You don't need to see it. No.

- Give it here.
- Fine. But I hadn't finished it yet.

"Sentimental favorite
and playboy politico,

Assemblyman Chris Marshall..."
Guess you missed a few words there, Jer.

What, "playboy"?
That's a compliment.

"... who called off his engagement
last week to uber babe Daniella Van Graas,

arrives in town solo."
Respectful, huh?

Well, listen, you know, you're
a public figure. It's news. So what?

We were never engaged.
Whose side are you on?

Yours. That's why sometimes
you have to listen to me.

- I mean, every now and again it might be nice.
- Here.

Welcome to the Beresford,
Mr. Marshall.

- Hello.
- My name is Lionel.

- Lionel?
- I'm the floor butler.

If there's anything you need,
please, call me.

Thank you. Uh, this is Jerry,
and this is Dan, and, uh, the dog is Rufus.

Thank you, Lionel. Thanks very much.
Nice to meet you. Thanks.

We'll call you if we need you. Chris,
will you look at me, please? Chris?

- Chris, can you look at me for a minute?
- What? I am looking at you.

We're going to Maddox's thing
on Monday night.

No, no, Jerry, we're not.

See, this is when I wish
your old man were here to back me up.

- What?
- I said, I wish your old man

- were here to back me up.
- My father had no use for that man.

Your father knew
how to use that man.

- Where are you going?
- What?

- Uh, that depends. Where are you going?
- Bathroom. Alone.

- Yeah. Fine.
- Thank you.

Go. Great. Yeah. Sure.
Call me if you need anything.

Oh, my God. I'm sorry, sir.

Thank you.

Sir.

Thank you. Thank you very much.
I'm so clumsy.

- Happens to all of us. Here.
- Thank you.

- Let me help you.
- Thank you.

- Where do those go?
- Caroline Lane. Park Suite.

She just checked in with a request
for immediate unpack and press.

Here. Blood and Dolce...

Thank you. Thank you.

I mean, there are limits.

You're so bad.
You really are, Rache.

Yes, just hold on a second.

Thank you. Anything, I mean,
it's up and down.

One day, we're looking at rings,
and the next day, we're breaking up.

Yeah. No way.

So, I, uh,

I had my assistant accidentally forward
my calendar for the week to his e-mail.

Yeah, and, of course, I added a few extra
lunch dates and dinner parties with my ex.

Fantastic, right?

Eric will be furious.

- Oh, that needs pressing.
- Okay.

But let's not forget Eric trades
commodities for a living.

A little competition right now
might increase my market value.

Listen, my darling, I'm gonna
be late. I'll call you later, okay?

Um... Excuse me. Sorry.

Could you just hold up those
two outfits that Dolce sent over earlier?

Oh, um... These two?

Well, I-I-I just simply can't tell
without the stockings.

Could I ask you an enormous favor?

I mean, I know this isn't your job,
and I'd never normally ask, but I'm so...

- It's okay.
- Oh, you're such a doll.

Um, would you run down to Madison
and get me three pairs of pantyhose?

- Well, the concierge usually does that. You could just...
- Yes, but he'll get lost in translation.

Oh, please. You look like
you're someone

who knows the difference
between taupe and caramel.

- Okay.
- Oh, thanks.

Here. Thank you so much.

- Okay.
- Oh, oh, and sorry.

Can you send someone else
to finish the unpacking, please?

- Right away.
- Thanks.

Bye.

Attention!
Somebody's coming!

- You think it's gonna rain?
- Maybe. It's possible.

- Hi, where's the fire?
- Nowhere.

I just got sent on an errand and I'm
already running late, so do me favor.

- Get these pressed for me, all right?
- Sure, in my spare time.

By the way, 11 o'clock,
two poodles raiding your cart too.

- What?
- Can't be late for Ty!

Mary Anne, if you don't wear
that dress, I'm gonna come over.

I'm gonna go in your closet.
I'm gonna put it on for you.

Wait. Hold on a sec.

Excuse me, miss?
Where are you going?

- Uh, just in back to see if Carrie's here.
- Carrie's not here.

So could you just... step away?

Away.

Away. Away from there.
Thank you.

Hi. Sorry.
Uh, okay, so you go first.

No, you! No, you. Uh-huh...

Get out.

- Get out.
- Excuse me, just a moment.

You know what? I have customers,
so go on quick.

Yeah. Uh-huh. Then what?

No, he didn't.

- No, he didn't.
- Can I just ask you one question?

You know what, ma'am?
You have to wait. Okay?

What? No, a maid.

- I don't know.
- Yo.

- You can't be back here.
- Leezette?

What are you doing?

Listen. Being that we're sisters
in the service business

and being I'm in kind of a rush,

I'd say you start serving
your low-end customers

because, after all,
that's the reason you're here.

Unless we're not good enough
for you to service.

In which case,
I'm sure your manager is.

What do you say, ladies?
Am I right or am I right?

- You're right.
- Oh, yes.

- Sorry, mom.
- Hi, baby, where were you?

Keef, do me a favor.

These go to the goddess
in the Park Suite, okay?

- I got you. Don't forget the bags.
- Thank you.

Are you ready?

- I'm not gonna have time to change.
- Oh, sure you do. We'll be a little late.

No, ma,
we cannot be late, okay?

- Come on.
- I was on time.

Are they here yet?

- Hello?
- Marisa?

Yeah. Marcus. Yeah.

No, I can't hear you.

- When's Ty's speech again?
- I'll get it, I'll get it, I'll get it.

In 20 minutes, at 4 o'clock.

- And you cannot be late.
- Well...

Marcus!

- You're just breaking up. I can't... What?
- I can't be there. I'm in Miami.

- Please tell me you're kiddin'.
- I'm in Miami with Mugsy.

Don't do this to me, Marcus.

Don't let him get away with it.
Be strong, Marisa.

What am I supposed
to tell 'im this time?

- This weekend is the holiday.
- I know.

- Okay? He's counting on it.
- He'll get over it.

- I'll take him away at Christmas, okay?
- Marcus, tell somebody who believes you, okay?

I gotta go.

That shit.

This fell outta your bag.
Is it yours?

Yeah. Thanks.

- Management, huh?
- Mm-hm.

Que fancy.

What?

I'm not saying a word.

Can you not say a word
somewhere else?

And our next speaker
will be Ty Ventura.

Richard Milhouse Nixon...

was a man
of many contradictions.

Even though
he is remembered in history

as the only president
to ever resign,

his foreign policies
and his relations with China

opened up the Western door
to Eastern...

I mean, Eastern door
to Western ties.

That's enough.

Born a Quaker,
he was nevertheless...

He was responsible for bombing...

for the violent bombing of...

Richard Nixon was born in...

Hey, baby.

They were all laughing at me,
and then I lost my words.

You know,
it happens sometimes, honey.

I never wanna
do that again, okay?

You're gonna
do better next time.

No.

All right, we'll talk about it later...

because I got something for you.
The new Nixon tapes.

Come on, you know
you wanna open it.

Mom.

Oh, papi. I'm sorry.

Where's dad?

He had a construction job
in Poughkeepsie.

And it was paying time and a half,
and he had to do it, baby.

It's okay.

So you'll hang out with me
at the hotel this weekend, okay?

A married guy was in again
buying clothes for his girlfriend.

I know. He gave me
his number yesterday.

- 'S up, Frannie? 'S up, Michelle?
- Good morning, Marisa.

- Hey, Ty, how are you?
- What's up, Ty?

Lily?
We're here.

Hey... You gonna keep me
company today, Ty?

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

Now, he's got books and puzzles
and all kinds of fun stuff. Right, baby?

- I'm on 22 if you need me, okay?
- Okay.

So I'll see you at lunchtime.

You all right?

I'm cool.

You know, I am really sorry
about all this.

It's not your fault.

- See you later. Thank you.
- Sure.

What's with the face?

He's a kid. He has
a whole hotel to play with.

- We come here every day.
- He'll have a ball.

- You said it.
- Uh-huh.

You, on the other hand,
you need to loosen up.

I'm not interested.

- Why are you stealing my tissues?
- I need 'em.

While you're in there, get me some soap,
shower caps, some Kiehl's...

We need some fun in our lives. You know,
be spontaneous, kick up our skirts.

- The expression is "heels".
- Maybe for you.

- I'm with you, girl.
- You only live once.

- You know. Come on.
- No.

Live it, girl.

I'm livin'.

I'm livin'.

Come on, help me clean
the Park Suite. You're not doing nothin'.

Oh, sorry. Aren't you
the maid, uh, I had yesterday?

- Yes, ma'am.
- Oh, fantastic. I-I need another favor.

I'm so late for lunch,
otherwise I'd do it myself.

Would you mind running downstairs
to the boutique

and returning my outfits
in the closet?

- Sure, I'll take care of it.
- Thank you, thank you. You're the best.

Okay.

- Who's she?
- She's the goddess.

Staying in the Park Suite.
You two actually have a lot in common.

Oh, yeah? Then why am I
the one wearing the uniform?

Well, tell me about it... What I meant was
that she also has a boyfriend

who she's been with for a while,
who still has not popped...

Her cherry?
Because then we'd be identical.

- Why, what are you looking at?
- I meant the question.

My God, is your mind always...

- on... the pepperoni?
- That's right, baby.

All right, here's the difference
between me and the goddess.

She's playing games
to trick 'im into wanting her...

- And you're what?
- I'm working hard for the money.

Speaking of which, you hand
in your application? Management?

Yeah.

What are you doing?

- Dolce, nice.
- No, no, no, come on, get outta there.

I'm just taking a little peek.
They're going back anyway.

You know,
you're gonna get us in trouble.

Hello, ladies.

Leave that stuff alone.
Come on.

You know, you're supposed
to be helping me out in here.

Oh, feel this material.

I mean, it's like butter.

Oh, my God.

This stuff is... 5,000 dollars.

For one white outfit?
How do you keep it clean?

Scotchgard.

Oh, yeah.
They're a 6, you're a 6.

What're you doing?
What are you doing?!

And shoes too.

Shoes. Size 9. Perfect.

- I'm a 7 1/2.
- Which means you're an 8.

Just put on some gym socks,
you're good to go.

That's it. Put this stuff back.
What are you doing?

Not until you try it on.

I can't try on her clothes!

They're not hers. They're not Dolce's.
Technically, they've been... abandoned.

Let's not let them hear us.

Who, the clothes?

Marisa Ave Maria Ventura,

when will you or I ever gonna get
to try on a 5,000-dollar anything?

Come on, feel how
the other half feels... Huh?

- Hey, Lily, what are you doing?
- Hey. I'm sewing on a button.

What's the cook making for lunch?

Saturday, you'll have
mac and cheese.

- Where you going?
- Around. I'll be right back.

- Stay close, okay?
- Okay.

Rufus.

Rufus, come here.
Come here. Sit. Sit.

- Where you goin'?
- I'm goin' for a walk.

No, no, no, no, no, there's a League
of Woman Voters lunch starting downstairs.

- We should do a drive-by.
- You do a real quick pit stop?

Yeah, yeah, in and out.
Leave 'em laughing.

- Hey, Jer, quick question. Be honest.
- Sure thing.

Do I look as stupid
as you think I am?

No. No, I mean, you're not stupid.
What... what are you talking about?

- Come on. Come on, come on.
- Wait, wait, wait. Where you going? No, no.

There's a problem. You have
a problem with the ladies' lunch?

I have a problem trying to upstage
Victor Delgado. Remember him?

The same guy running
against me for Senate,

same guy scheduled to speak
at the same lunch downstairs?

He's not speaking until 1:30.

Look, I know this offends your sense
of fairness, but I would like to win this election.

- You don't give up, do you?
- No, of course I don't give up.

That's why you hired me.
Look, you go to the luncheon, okay?

You go to Maddox's thing on Monday night.
"Hello", "goodbye", you leave, you're home free.

Define "free".

You know, look, uh, they have people
who will walk your dog for you.

- I mean, I know that's a crazy idea.
- Jerry, I wanna walk my own dog.

Relax. You're starting
to lose your hair.

He's friendly.

- His name is Rufus.
- Hey, Rufus.

So, what are you listening to?

- The Best of Bread.
- Best of Bread? Interesting.

What's your name?

- Ty.
- Nice to meet you, Ty. I'm Chris.

I'm bald
and no one in particular.

I know who you are.

Yeah? What do you know?

I know that you're
the state assemblyman.

I know that you're thinking
of running for senator.

I know your voting record and
your consistent stand on environmental causes.

Great.

- Look, I hate to interrupt, but...
- Are you Republican?

Yes.

Why?

- Richard Nixon was Republican.
- So what?

- He lied.
- So, what does that mean?

Nothing.

Who told you to ask
these questions?

Nobody.

What press are you affiliated with?

I'm 10.

What about your parents?
Are they Democrat or Republican?

- What's the difference these days?
- I love this kid.

Well, what's not to love?

- Where you going?
- I'm gonna walk Rufus.

What, are you writing a book?
In 10 minutes, okay?

- One pee.
- If mom says okay, can I come?

- What?
- If my mom says okay, can I come?

- Uh, sure. Where's your mom?
- Back on the 22. Park Suite.

Uh, no, you know what, Chris?
You're in a hurry. Okay?

- He doesn't have time.
- No, you know what? He's in a hurry. I'm fine.

- You take 'im.
- What?

I'll go up with you. You know what?
I forgot his ball anyway.

I don't wanna... Wait!

Hold on!

Hi, honey. It's Ty!

What are you doing up here?

Where's mom?

It's, uh, for you, ma'am.

What are you talking about?
Ty, don't you...?

Hey, ma, this is Chris. He's got
a giant grey dog named Rufus.

And if you say okay,
I'm gonna go walk with 'im, okay?

- Hello.
- Hi.

Let's not forget. I'm a kid and I need
fresh air. Please, can I go, mom? Please, please.

I'm Chris... Marshall.

Caroline...

you want your coat?

- What?
- The weather can be so tricky here.

Weren't you saying
what a beautiful day it was?

Oh, you're going out?

Weren't you saying how
you wanted to stretch your legs?

Well, if your husband
wouldn't mind...

She doesn't have a husband.

- I don't have a husband.
- Well, I insist, then.

- Come with us, if you're free.
- Yeah.

- Come on, mom.
- Here we go.

I can't.

- Put these on.
- The shoes are too big.

Oh, no. Have a good time. Have fun.

- Come on, Ty, let's go find Rufus.
- Come on, mom.

Mr. Marshall, John Bextrum,
hotel manager.

This is fun.

- So be cool, okay?
- Okay.

What's this?

If that slips out again,
tuck it in for me.

And the night before.
You're not answering your pager.

- Really? I never got the message.
- Really?

You said you'd take us to Niketown.

Well, here,
I'll go down with you.

I think she's very beautiful.

What a fine outfit!
How can she keep it all that clean?

Scotchgard?

- I believe she's his new girlfriend.
- Uh-huh, for tonight.

Ladies, perhaps you'd like
to come with us.

You pig!

Au revoir.

- Bye-bye.
- Bye.

Come on, Rufus. Just pee, pee,
come on, cause I have stuff to do.

- Pee! Lift your leg.
- Jerry Siegel, is that you?

Hey, Maddox, how are you?
Small world.

You know Victor Delgado.

Victor, Jerry Siegel.
Chris Marshall's right-hand.

- You groom also?
- That's good, that's good.

I was showing, uh, Victor
our new building on 57th. Wanna join us?

Uh, no, I can't.
I'm jammed. I've got, you know...

- I can see that.
- Yeah, well, I mean...

Don't forget to scoop.

Kill! Kill, Rufus! Kill!

Come on. Let's go. You're gonna
have to hold it. Come on!

Okay, I'll handle it.
Walk to the park.

I'll get Rufus and Jerry,
and we'll catch up. Go ahead.

Guys, guys, there's nothing here.
It's just an old friend and her son.

- She got a name?
- Yeah, "Unidentified Old Friend".

I'll tell you what. You give me this,
I'll give you 15 minutes

inside the benefit,
Monday night.

You'll get us in at the Met?

- You got it.
- Open bar?

- Don't push it.
- Thank you, Mr Marshall.

Okay.

Hey, come on, Rufus.

Did you have fun
with mean, old Jerry?

Oh, yeah, we had a great time!
It was perfect timing.

Both Delgado and Maddox
saw me walking your goddamn dog.

Oh, oh. See, you should get out more.
Come on, Rufus.

All right, now look. He's gonna be there.
He's gonna be there at 1:30.

I want you there at 1 o'clock, okay?
All right? Okay?

Bye. I'm going to shower.

I just borrowed them.
Pretty hot, though, huh?

- Hey, wait up!
- Don't say anything. Just act...

- Hey.
- Heeey.

Hey, Rufus.

I couldn't do it.
All those photographers all the time?

Well, you don't know what
you can do until you have to.

There's not a lot of choice.
You get used to it.

- Can I take him?
- Sure. Go ahead.

- Be careful. He's strong.
- Come on, Rufus.

- Be careful, okay? And stay close.
- I will.

Whoa! Whoa! Hang on! Whoa!

Thanks for this.
He's... been a little down lately.

Yeah, and then yesterday, he gave a speech
at school, and he messed it up and...

It was bad.

Speeches can be tricky.
What happened?

Why, I don't know. He just
kinda froze and ran off-stage. And I...

Now he has this thing about speaking
in public. He's all freaked out.

I always get nervous
before I go on, you know.

- Really?
- Yeah.

Well, not always.
Just... sometimes.

- Mr. Marshall?
- Look at the dogs.

What a surprise, a dog walker.
Let me guess. Jerry sent you.

- Yeah, to get Rufus.
- Uh-huh.

- Oh, is that Rufus?
- That's him.

He's beautiful.

- Can I?
- Sure.

- Hey, buddy!
- Can I have him?

- Okay.
- Thank you.

- Ma, can I go play?
- Yep, go ahead.

This is for you.

- Thank you.
- Bye. Let's go.

It's from my nanny.

Hey, do you wanna sit down?

- Oh, sure.
- Hey, over here.

Okay.

Cool, I won't get dirty.

Oh, Lord! I almost sat on your face.
Right there.

Ty seems like a terrific kid.

Thanks. I'm kinda crazy
about 'im.

I have never met a...
a 10-year-old Nixon aficionado.

Yeah, I know. Uh, last year,
they studied the '70s at school

and... he's become obsessed
with the politics, the music...

Last one he was reading
the Kissinger biography.

- You're kidding!
- No.

I'm waiting for him
to discover another decade.

- Until then... I'm learning a lot.
- Bueno, I think it's great.

- You do?
- Yeah, I do.

Hey, ma, guess what? I threw a stick
up in the air, and Rufus caught it!

- Really?
- Yeah. I'm gonna go do it again.

So, uh... How long are you
in town for?

Um... I'm not sure.

You always stay at the Beresford?

Sometimes I feel like I live there.

So, what brings you here?

- Work.
- What do you do?

- Oh, my God! 11 o'clock, by the tree.
- What?

Check it, 11 o'clock.

Oh, gee, that's Eddie Yatter.

- What does he want?
- He's paparazzi. I can't shake 'im.

He works for... for Blanton Maddox,

whose one goal lately is
to catch me with, uh, another woman

so his... sleazy tabloid can say
that I've, you know, I've broken up with, um...

- Your supermodel fiancee?
- Uh-huh.

Oh, God! Ty!

- What?
- Come on!

- Um.. I just realized that you...
- Excuse me?

- Sorry, it's just that my face is...
- What?

- What's wrong with your face?
- No, it... it's stuck to your...

What's that?

- Oh, God. Oh, God!
- Here, here, here...

- Get it off of me!
- Let me, let me, let me. Okay.

Oh, my God! Did I get
anything on it? Is it okay?

It's... it's perfect.

- So, uh...
- Okay.

Don't believe
everything you read.

- Any of it true?
- Uh, no.

Well, we, yeah, we were seeing each other.
Now it's... we're seeing less of each other, so...

It's complicated. Uh...

You know, I wanna
show you something. Follow me.

Okay.

Oh, God.

- Let me help you.
- I got it. It's fine. I'm good.

Don't worry about me.

Look at that.

It's like two different worlds.

- Interesting perspective, huh?
- Yeah.

And I'd like to point out
it's... paparazzi-free.

You know when I come here most
is when I have to make a speech...

and I get nervous.

- You get nervous?
- Sure.

See that?

I don't know about you, but sometimes
when I have to stand up in front of people,

my heart, it kinda races,
and I... I can't remember my words.

- Same here. I know.
- Really? Same with you?

Yeah.

Wow. Well, in my business,
it's not a good thing, right?

- Well, what do you do?
- What do I do?

I wanna show you something.

I... I hold on... to this.

A paper clip?
Was that a paper clip?

It was. See,
I-I had to find something

to draw all the nervous energy
away from my heart.

Like a...

- Like a lightning rod?
- Like a lightning rod. Exactly.

All the energy
goes into the paper clip.

And then what's left is, um...

Your speech.

Yeah, a smooth,
and I'd like to think a...

very... compelling speech.

With some of the best speakers
in history...

a paper clip.

Uh, let me see. Henry Kissinger.

He wasn't known
for his speaking abilities.

No, he wasn't, was he?

Well, imagine what he would've
been like without the...

- Oh, he would've really sucked.
- He would've what?

- Really sucked.
- Right.

So, maybe you'll try again, huh?

Hey, ma, can we go
see the penguins?

- Let's go see penguins.
- Five minutes.

Okay.

- You're a bad influence.
- I am?

Hurry up, ma!

Look at this guy go.

They're so funny.

They look like little, fat,
short guys with tuxedos.

You know, speaking of fat guys in tuxedos,
there's this thing Monday night.

It's a black-tie.
It's a... 2,500-dollar-a-plate dinner.

- Oh, my God. 2,500 dollars per plate?
- 2,500 dollars a plate.

- I hope you get to keep the plate.
- Oh, you can if you want.

What is it for?

It's for the inner-city literacy
campaign, it's something I support.

It's a big benefit that Blanton Maddox
throws every year. And it's...

You know, it's not so quite as boring as it sounds.
I don't know, are you interested?

Wait a minute. Isn't that the guy who
hired Yatter to get pictures of you?

Yes, it is.

Well, I don't get it.
Why would you go?

I go because I go.
It's... it's exposure.

Won't everyone know you're there
just to expose yourself?

Well, I kinda
have to expose myself.

- When you put it that way...
- I didn't put it that way. You put it that way.

I don't care how much
you have to pay for dinner.

You shouldn't have to serve yourself up,
no matter what the cause.

So, then, why don't you tell me
what you really think.

- You really want me to tell you what I think.
- Mm-hm.

Okay. If this Mr. Wanton Maddox, or
whatever the hell his name is, really wants to help,

why doesn't he take the 2,500 per plate
and give it the inner-city schools?

And eat a little bit lighter that night,
you know what I'm saying?

So why don't you come with me
and tell him yourself.

Monday...

I'm busy. Sorry.

You're busy, you can't?
What? Can you change it?

It's complicated.

Which reminds me, I gotta get
outta here. Come on, Ty, we gotta go.

- We gotta go. We're gonna be late.
- Do we have to?

Bye.

- I gotta get back.
- Caroline.

This can't be it. Come on,
we haven't seen the, uh, the snakes.

Except for Yatter.

It was nice meeting you,
Chris Marshall.

We're late. We gotta go.
Come on.

Here, Ty...

- Don't use 'em all on one speech, okay?
- I won't.

- Oh! Keep up the good voting record.
- I'll do my best.

"It's complicated."
What kind of answer is that?

Honest.

The only thing complicated between me
and him would be unhooking my bra strap.

Look, what am I supposed to do?
Make his bed with me in it?

Get real!

- He thinks I'm a guest here.
- All right. All right.

But just tell me what he was like.

- Sexy eyes.
- Yeah, yeah.

- And nice lips.
- Mm-mm.

What about the hands?
Were they big?

- They were perfect.
- Perfect works.

- Marisa!
- Yeah. Who? What?

- Marisa Ventura, are you back there?
- Oh, my God, it's Paula!

What are you doing?

I just, um...
I spilled something on my apron...

so I was cleaning it,
and, uh, she was helping me tie it.

Mr. Bextrum wants to see you
in his office right now.

Okay.

Oh, shit!

Look who's here.
Look, let's review the last hour, okay?

Delgado killed while you were out
walking that goddamn dog.

- Oh, hey, Joe, you got a pen that works? Because...
- Oh, yeah. Sure. Here you go, sir.

- Is there anything else I can do for you?
- No, that's good, thanks. Okay. Lionel!

Gotta get this note to the woman
in the Park Suite.

Her name is Caroline.

- Can you handle that for me?
- Certainly, sir.

Thank you.

Who's this? Wait! W-w-w...
Who's Caroline in the Park Suite?

It's, uh, someone I met.
You wanted me to have an escort

for that Maddox literacy thing
on Monday night.

Yeah, but I was thinking more
among the lines

of a blind, ex-illiterate senior citizen
who learned to read while fighting the Nazis.

I thought
your mother was in Florida.

Just make sure that
she's not married, on medication,

or a Democrat.
Did you check, or...?

Rufus. Rufus.

Sure, okay, great.
Can I talk to you for a second?

I want you to find out who
Caroline is in the Park Suite.

Don't write it down.
Just remember it. Okay?

Thanks. Good job.

Come in, Miss Ventura.

I assume you know the reason
you've been called.

I think so. Yes, sir.

Do you know what the foundation
of a great hotel is?

Location?

Loyalty and trust.

Would you say those are qualities
that you possess?

I would. Yes, sir.

Miss Burns agrees.

And she's urged me
to consider you.

We had no idea you were
interested in management

until Miss Kehoe brought us
your application.

By the way, you forgot
your social security number

and your mother's maiden name.

If you just fill them in
and sign right there. Perfect.

Normally, you'd have to go through the entire program
and train for a year as a butler, but...

... given the circumstances...

rather extraordinary
due to overbooking and understaffing,

we decided to accelerate
your application.

And move you directly into management
after the six-week training.

With the proviso, of course,
that you pass the practical exam

and you fulfill each requirement
for every station.

So, you see, Miss Ventura,
sometimes...

when life shuts one door...
it opens a window.

So jump.

Steph, where are you?
I know you're in here.

- Oh, don't tell me you're busted.
- No, you are.

You know what?
You had no right!

What are you talking about?

You filled out
an application for me?

- Ahh, they're considering you.
- Yes. Do you know what you've done?

- I did you a favor.
- No. If you wanna do me a favor,

then you mind your freakin' business
once in a while.

For two years, you've been yapping
about gettin' out of uniform

and what ideas you got etcetera.

This morning, I'm having coffee
with Rosalie from personnel

and I ask her.
I go, "Marisa got a shot?"

She goes, "Marisa who?"
I go, "Marisa Ventura. She's applied."

And she goes, "If she applied, I'd slip it to
the top o' the pile." You know what I'm sayin'?

So I just act real nonchalantlike
and I go... "Are you sure?"

So she goes, she double-checks,
and she tells me:

"Marisa Ventura ain't never applied
for no management program ever."

Imagine my shock and dismay.

My own partner,
lying to me like that.

And then I figured maybe you're just
too chickenshit, so I went ahead and did it myself.

Figured if they took you,
you'd be happy.

And if they didn't, you wouldn't know
the difference. So sue me!

These are the golden years.
We gotta prove our mothers wrong.

Don't waste them.

Well, what we did today was wrong.

But you didn't really lie.
Not technically.

Now you're starting
to sound like Richard Nixon. Listen.

Letting someone believe
something is true when it's not

is just as much
a lie as a lie is.

I let 'im think that I was staying in the suite,
not cleaning it. I'm the maid, Ty.

Ma, I hate to break it to you,
but I don't think he's after your money.

I can't believe you just said that!

Just get my keys in my pocket,
please. This is hot.

Good job.

All right, sweetie.
Behave yourself, okay?

- Thank you.
- My pleasure.

Can I borrow this?

- Of course.
- Thank you.

Okay, baby, bye.

And remember,
all security IDs

will need to be rephotographed
starting next week.

I think that's all.
Thank you very much.

Barbara, Clarice,
come with me, please.

- Have you seen this?
- No. What?

Well, let me show you.

Gimme this.

Yeah. So?

What do you mean, "so"? What if somebody
from the hotel sees it? What if Bextrum sees it?

I hate to break the bubble.
You... you can't even tell it's you.

- Don't worry about it.
- It's the front page of the paper today.

Oh, just stop. Jesus! You do
one spontaneous thing in your whole life,

- you think you're going to hell.
- Do you understand this could be bad?

Don't be such a Catholic.
Please. Come on.

Good morning. How are you?
Nice to see you.

- Can I steal him away for a second?
- Sure.

- Let me steal you away.
- Excuse me.

- I want to talk to you.
- What's the problem?

This! Do you know
what this is gonna cost me? Huh?

An entire day of doing nothing
but covering your ass.

I'm already getting phone calls from
the "London Times", the "Washington Post",

the "Chicago Sun", asking
about her identity, her background,

who the kid is. A kid!

Just when I get them to focus on
your assets, they're focusing on hers.

Thanks.

Yeah, well, they're fantastic assets,
don't you think?

Squeezing the circle
tighter and tighter and tighter...

and release.
Let's try that again.

And... squeeze the circle
tighter, tighter...

- and relax.
- I'm sorry, I'll come back.

That's okay.
You can work around us.

We could use some more towels,
por favor. Rapido.

Squeezing the circle tighter
and tighter and tighter.

Radiating from the pelvis.

Good. Breathe.

Exhale.

Are you all right?

Oh, Twinkles, is it Eric?
I knew it.

He hasn't called once.

Not my cell, not the service,
not the hotel.

So last night I called 'im, and...
Oh, Rach, he was with...

I can't.
It's like cheap wine.

- Shall we do some band work, ladies?
- Go on, I'm listening.

- I heard her in the background.
- The cheap wine?

His ex, in midlaugh.

Butler service, Miss Lane.

I have a message
from Mr. Christopher Marshall.

Christopher Marshall?!

As in... Christopher Marshall?

He's staying in the York Suite
and was wondering

if you had a response
to the luncheon invitation

I placed in your room yesterday.

- We're through. We're done. Thank you.
- In my room?

- I have to charge the full hour.
- Yesterday.

- Fine.
- For lunch?

- For two.
- Get out!

- Where?
- In his suite.

This is a miracle.

- Shall I give him an answer?
- Yes. Tell him yes. What time?

- 1 p.m.
- She'll be there. Thank you.

When did this go down?

We met at this thing
in Southampton last summer.

I thought we had a moment.

"Can you steal away an hour,
please?"

- You think he saw you in the hall?
- Who cares? What should I wear?

You look good in anything.

But I didn't bring a thing!

Let's see.

Oh! Oh, Maria, thank goodness.
I need a favor. It's urgent.

Could you go downstairs and get
those outfits you returned for me yesterday?

There's this divine
Dolce cashmere coat. It's just...

Actually, they're still in the closet.
I... I-I thought you might want a second look.

You are so good.
Thank God!

- You should be a personal assistant.
- She's a maid.

- So are they, with better titles.
- Actually, I'm up for a.... position.

What do you think?

Dolce coat, Gucci pants...

... or... Ralph Lauren skirt,
Manolo pumps?

Ooh, they're both divine!
Let's see.

How 'bout the pants, open sandals,
see-through blouse,

colored bra and encore
the Dolce coat for effect.

- Maria?
- She barely speaks English.

- What?
- Excuse me?

Maria, what do you think?

What about the beaded skirt
with that beige...

croched halter
you have hanging in the closet?

You know, casual sexy.
No stockings...

Definitely eighty-six the coat.
It sends the wrong message.

Looks like you're going someplace.

Besides, that whole...
see-through blouse, colored-bra thing...

reads a little, you know, desperate, older gal,
trying too hard. Don't you think?

You know, you wanna
make him work for it.

Who does she think she is
to talk to me like that?

Thank you, Maria.

I've two words for you,
Rachel Hoffberg. Eric who?

Excuse me. Sorry.

Yes, that's it.

All handles parallel
with the right elbow.

Mm-hm. Yeah.

Review your protocols for
table setting and wine service.

We're serving lunch
at the York Suite today.

- Butler service, Mr. Marshall.
- Come on in.

Hey, Rufus, it's okay.
Thank you.

Water glasses 3 inches east
of the wine goblets.

- Make a perfect triangle.
- Yes, sir.

Hold on, I'm coming.

- Caroline!
- Chris!

Oh, you're an animal lover too!
So am I.

I just... I just can't
get enough of them.

Oh, what a wonderful idea.
Lunch a deux. Lovely.

Caroline...

I just knew that we made
a connection at the...

Feathered Friends Tournament.

Oh, oh, look!

How sweet of you
to remember.

But I hope you didn't think
I needed reminding.

Oh! And Teddy Parrish
sends you his best.

Oh, Teddy.

Right. Yeah.

How is Teddy?

Drinking again,
but you didn't hear it from me.

Excuse me,
I just gotta check on something.

Of course.

Uh, Lionel, who is that over there?

Caroline Lane.

No. No, it's not her.

- It's not her?
- No.

- Oh, uh... The Maddox thing.
- Uh-huh. Oh, yeah.

- Are you going?
- Of course.

You know who I can't figure out
where I know them from?

The woman visiting you
the other day,

kind of Mediterranean,
with a little boy about... 10.

Oh, Rachel Hoffberg, Mediterranean?
She's from Westport.

She's premenopausal,
but don't tell her I said so.

You're staying in the Park Suite,
right, Caroline?

Yes. Yes, I am.

Good. Well, it's the...
it's damnedest thing.

This salmon is perfect.

Your whole presentation today
has been excellent. Well done.

Thank you.

Make sure you tuck it in tightly.

She's about 5'6", dark hair,
really beautiful, has a kid named Ty.

What the hell happened?

- I'm sorry, sir.
- Don't be sorry. Just find 'er.

Oh, Chris, I loved your quote
in "The Times".

Please!

We're all here to try to land
the Rothford Estate. I mean it's worth zillions.

And, uh, Sotheby's are counting on me
to lock the whole thing up.

- Thank you so much.
- Really?

Hey, Rufus, come 'ere.

Thank you.

Sit. Sit.

Maria, um, could I have
a little water, please?

- Good boy.
- Such a sweet dog.

Allow me.

- That will be all.
- I mean, you know Nettie Rothford.

Oh, sure, sure.

She and I virtually grew up together.

I mean, her place was bang
next to daddy's on the Vineyard.

- Right there.
- Good evening.

Another interesting day now,
huh, Marisa?

- I don't know. Was it?
- You tell me.

Nice lunch?

All right, what's up,
mystery man?

How many times you watched
the monitors with me?

How many times we enjoyed
the comings and goings?

Thousands.

You know what?
You over there, nosy body.

You know I'm beholden
to report employees misbehaving.

And there's only one thing
could make me shut my mouth.

You dirty old man.

You're in trouble.
What are you laughing at?

About the silver soap dishes...

Oh, Rach, darling,
I'll just be a sec.

- Hi, I'm, uh, Caroline Lane...
- In the Park Suite, yes.

- Yeah. Um, I called about a ticket to the...
- Benefit. Monday night.

We were able to procure you a single
at a table on the floor adjacent to Mr. Marshall's.

Fantastic!
And how much will that be?

- Three thousand dollars.
- What?

The rates are raised
when a couple is split.

Singles are always harder to place.

Well, I mean, what is it?
Is it on the Internet I'm an ex-couple?

I mean,
does the whole hotel know?

Is there a Biblical sign on my forehead?
"Unmarried, unclean"?

Do I bear the scarlet letter? I'm...

I'm...

I'm just... Sorry. I...

I'm... I'm better now. Um...

Just, uh, charge it to my room.

Yes, ma'am.

Come on, Rach.
Ghastly man!

I am terrified to ask
what that was about.

I think, being dumped.

- Can I get your autograph?
- Sure. Amber? Is that your name?

- Amber's your name all right.
- How you doin'?

Get in the car! Get in the car!
Get in the car!

- Did she see us?
- Yeah. No. You're fine, you're fine. All's clear.

- It's fine.
- How did this happen?

Well, look,
I think she's very attractive.

I had her checked out, just so you know.
She comes from a great family, with money,

politically neutral and there are
no naked pictures of her anywhere. So...

That woman wasn't
the woman I wanted.

Well, I don't know what to tell you, buddy.
I talked to the manager of the hotel.

And he said that's the only Caroline Lane
staying in the Park Suite.

Wait. There she is.

That's her. Cordell, pull over.

- Hey, wait! Ty! Caroline!
- Hey, Chris!

- Hey. How's it going, Ty?
- Okay.

- How you doing?
- Good.

You wanna hear something really strange?
I invited you to lunch today, and you came...

only it wasn't you.

So, what happened?

- I don't know what you mean.
- Well... Are you still staying at the Beresford?

Oh, no, we actually moved uptown.
You know, up... uptown.

Oh, great. Well, hop in. We'll give you a ride.
We're going to the to the Shimon Housing Projects.

- So, we can drop you where? At the Upper East?
- Yeah, mom!

Yeah. No. Um, r-remember, we're going to a party
just a few blocks away, so, uh, we'll walk.

- So, how do I get a hold of you?
- Her cell's 9-1-7...

How about I-I call you?

Y-you know what? If you wanna
get in touch with him,

why don't you just call him
at this number.

That's my card. All right?
What's your last name, hon?

- Ventura. What's yours?
- Spanish?

- Jerry Spanish?
- No, Siegel. We have to go.

- So do we. Bye.
- Okay. So, use that number, okay? Call anytime.

- All right.
- Don't be shy.

You know, we have to go cause you have
to give a speech, you're gonna be late for it, right?

- In the Bronx?
- Uh-huh.

- On what?
- Uh, housing projects.

Really?

You're telling people
in the Bronx about the projects?

No, I'm just gonna
take the press up there

and, you know, shine some light
on the living conditions. You know.

- Interesting.
- Yeah, we think so. All right. Shall we? Okay?

- Bye.
- What are you not saying?

- Nothing.
- Tell me.

Maybe you all should spend
some real time in the projects

and then you wouldn't have to...
make up speeches and then have to memorize 'em.

You know, it would be...
coming from some place real.

And how would you know?
I mean...

Because I grew up there.

I lived in a four-block radius
my whole life.

Bye.

Okay, let's go. Come on.

- Chris!
- What?

Shall we? Okay? Let's go.
Gotta go. Gotta go. Gotta go. Gotta go.

Who the hell is she?

I'll tell you who she isn't.
She isn't like anyone I have ever met before.

And she isn't a phony.

I'll make you a deal.
You want the menu,

you want me at the benefit tomorrow night?
Then get her to go.

And I swear to God, I'll shake any part
of Maddox's body you want me to.

- Deal?
- Deal. All right, sure. Okay.

Okay, get in.

Okay, so, for right now, with
the review and everything going on,

we need to be extra careful,
all right?

That means... no coming up
in the elevator to see me.

And no Chris Marshall.

- It's not like you're breaking some law.
- Hey, I mean it.

If you see him...

- I'll make like a baby and head out first.
- Thank you. Go to bed, okay?

- Good night, ma.
- Bye, baby.

Heads up!

The Chinese delegation will be
checking into the Lexington Suite.

Please note that the television channel
needs to be set to one of the Chinese...

Oh, my God. Hide me.

The Shapiros have requested
an early check-in.

So, we'll put them in the Dior Suite.

Yes, sir?

- They're in the hall.
- What are they doing?

- I don't know He's got something in his hands.
- Does it look serious?

Calm down, calm down,
it's just a letter.

- Find that girl.
- Certainly.

- He's coming.
- Be cool.

He's walkin'. He's walkin'.
Get outta here. He's outta here.

Thank you very much.
That will be all.

Now...

Are you truly interested
in management?

Yes, very much, sir.

Then I suggest that you go
to the Met tonight

and end all association
with Chris Marshall.

At least until you're a manager.
Then you can make your own rules.

I'll make sure your shift is covered.

- Mari.
- What happened?

- You can still be a manager, right?
- Yeah, if I break it off with Chris.

Break what off? No offense,
sweetheart. What planet are you on?

You don't get it.
You know, none o' you get it.

There was just something
different about him.

- Yeah, it's called money.
- Mm-hm.

- No, it's called...
- Please, don't say "love".

- Don't let her say it.
- She's going to.

We connected, you know... I...

- I felt it. Ty felt it too.
- Snap out of it, all right?

You are not in love with this man.
He is not in love with you.

You have no connections,
affiliations or loyalties.

You're from two different worlds.
Do you hear me?

- I hear you.
- Me too.

I don't know.

Come on, Maris, you...

You could be manager!

Think of it, girl. One of us...

out there!

- In a blazer.
- Yeah.

I don't have anything
to wear to this thing.

- Honey, look, it's not what you got.
- Baby, it's who you know.

- And what they got.
- You got it?

And when you're a manager, your first order
of business is to get us big fat...

... raises!

All right, Ty, focus.
Eyes forward.

Once more.
This is the Harry Winston...

... wreath necklace. Worth more
than I'll see in 10 lifetimes.

Good. And if it leaves her neck
at any time, you'll...

... be put up for adoption,
while my mom...

- ... rots in prison!
- Excellent.

- Wanna say hi to Harry?
- Harry.

Chris.

What do you need?
Tell me what you need.

Just your support, Harry.

What about a cameo
on Saturday Night Live?

- Let's wait on that.
- I'm calling Lorne.

It's nice to see you, Harry.

- Good to see you, Jerry.
- Okay.

- There they are. You see 'em?
- I see 'em.

We're going to line up Maddox's
support and get Grey's endorsement.

Just go and get it over with.

- Is she here?
- But... she'll be here. She'll be here.

- Have fun, ma.
- Thanks, bubba.

Listen, be good. Go to bed when
Steph tells you. No negotiating. Okay?

Oh, God.
I can't breathe.

I mean, I don't know what I'm doing here, Steph.
What am I doing? This is all a lie.

No, honey.
It's more like a dream, you know?

And for one night,
you're living it for all of us.

Don't think about tomorrow.
Don't think about anything but tonight.

Tonight, the maid is a lie.

And this...
this is who you really are.

- Bye
- Bye-bye. Goodbye.

What do you think?

I think we have a lot
of issues to talk about.

- Let's get together real soon.
- Good.

Excuse me. Um, I think now is
the perfect time if you'd like to...

Oh, my God, Jerry.
Look who's here.

Lovely of you,
but I... I don't think I'll be in town.

Look, you know what?
I'm gonna bring him over here.

No. She should be here by now.
I think she's not coming.

- She'll be here, she'll be here.
- She'd better be, Jerry.

You're beautiful.

So are you.

Thank you for being here.

Well, I only came
to tell you that... this...

you and me, can't go
anywhere beyond this evening.

It just can't.

Well, then, you should've
worn a different dress.

Wanna dance?

Look, you have to listen to me.
I know you're used to getting your way.

Yeah, until I met you.

There's... millions of women
who are just dying for you to look their way.

Yeah? Then why are you
making me work so hard?

Chris? Hi.
Uh, Maddox is open.

So, why don't you go over,
two minutes.

- Jerry. I'm here...
- I'll take over. I know. I'll take over.

- Oh, Chris. Hi.
- Hello.

- What a night. I mean, who isn't here?
- Right.

Do I need to know something
that I don't know already?

Well, that sounds like something
between you and your God, Jerry.

I like a good mystery, you know.

But not where his girlfriends
are concerned.

I'm not his girlfriend.

Well, whatever.
I just need him focused.

- Sorry about that. Jerry...
- Not at all.

- May I cut in now?
- You certainly may.

Where were we? Right here.
About here, wasn't it?

You better do whatever it is
you're supposed to do

because Jerry thinks
that I'm distracting you.

Wait, wait, wait. Never, never start
a sentence with... "Jerry thinks".

No, but... you should do
the right thing.

Why are you smiling?

Nothing, just until this minute,
I didn't know what that was.

- But I do now.
- You do what?

- Don't go anywhere.
- Well, Chris, this... I didn't mean...

I'll be right back.
I'll be right back.

Oh, excuse me.

Excuse me.
Um, haven't we met?

- I'm Caroline Lane and you're, uh...?
- Sotheby's Caroline Lane?

- Yes.
- Oh, it's wonderful to see you again.

Oh, I-I just knew we knew each other.
I never forget a face. Wow!

Is that a Harry Winston wreath?

They haven't made
that design since the late '60s.

You're very good.
If you'll excuse me, I have to go.

Listen, um,
just between us girls. Um...

Are you, uh, here with Chris?

- Can you keep a secret?
- Of course.

Good. So can I.

Caroline.

Caroline.

Caroline.

Do you have somewhere else
you have to be?

No, I just have to leave.

Well, I don't think you're leaving.
I think you're running.

And what I can't figure out is,
you running towards something you want?

Or you running away from
something you're afraid to want?

Look, I've made
so many mistakes already.

- I just don't wanna make it worse.
- You won't. I promise.

There's something
you don't know, okay?

Oh, God. How do I tell you this?

- Look, the first time that you saw me, I was...
- You were mesmerizing.

If tonight is all we have...

stay. Please.

It's over, baby.

Hi, honey.

I'm good.

At work.

Listen, abuela's gonna be there in about
10 minutes, and I'll be home at 6.

Did you and Steph
have a good time?

Yeah?

What are you gonna do in Buffalo?

Well, my plan is to sort of
accidentally bump into him.

- I mean, do you think that's too obvious?
- No.

- A Harry Winston wreath?
- Morning.

Isn't that that maid?

I mean, where would a maid get
that necklace? I thought maybe...

I'll fast-forward through this,
and you just point her out if you see her.

Oh, oh, wait, could you just
go back on that bit?

I mean, it... could be her.

Let's just...
Can we just go forward?

Wait! That's my Dolce coat!

- How could you have missed that?
- I'm sorry, sir.

I'll make sure maintenance
gets up there with a plunger.

And I'll call the pharmacy to see
if they have something for that.

Excuse me, sir. Mr. Bextrum wants
to see both of you in the Park Suite.

Lionel. Marisa.

Oh. Well, that's interesting.
She told me her name was Maria.

I thought it would be impolite
to correct you.

And I suppose you think
it's polite to steal people's clothes?

- I didn't steal...
- Miss Ventura, Mr. Bextrum has spent

the last 30 minutes trying to persuade
Miss Lane not to press formal charges.

I suggest you say
as little as possible.

We have it all on video.

Was everything returned?

Yes, sir.

Oh, Chris, I'm terribly sorry
to interrupt your busy morning.

We thought you should know
what was going on as soon as possible.

- What is going on?
- The woman you thought was a guest

on this floor is the maid on this floor.

Aren't you, Marisa?

No, wait.
Wait, her name is Caroline.

No, Chris, darling, that's my name.
She steals... clothes, identities...

What-what the hell's happening here?
Why-why are you dressed that way?

Caroline?

Is this... is this true?

Yeah, it is.

Jesus Christ! The press is gonna have
a field day with this one.

There's no reason
to involve the press.

Yes. And how are you going
to prevent her from speaking?

This would never happen
at the Four Seasons.

And I can assure you it has never
happened here before either.

Lionel, you are slipping. You should've
noticed something. I am disappointed.

Please, Mr. Bextrum,
he had nothing to do with it.

Of course, sir. I understand.

We'll talk about this later.
Miss Ventura, you no longer work here.

Please, go to security,
hand in your passes and your ID

and you'll be escorted
from the building.

- Yes, sir.
- Is that really necessary?

Chris, let the man do his job, okay?

Uh, uh, oh, Chris.

Oh, Chris. I can't help but feel
that this is partly my fault.

It isn't. Spare yourself.

At least let me buy you lunch.

After all, we've only got each other
to get through this... humiliation.

Caroline, the first lunch was a mistake.
A second would be complete torture.

Drinks, then?

I need your nametag, passkey
and your ID card.

- Sorry, Marisa, but I have to.
- I understand.

Oh, God, don't tell me that
they fired you over this too.

No.

Actually, I made a decision
a moment ago.

It was long overdue.

You quit?

Sometimes...

we're forced in directions that we...
ought to have found for ourselves.

Thank you.

Thanks, Keef. Bye.

To serve people...

takes dignity and intelligence.

But remember,
they're only people with money.

And although we serve them,
we are not their servants.

What we do, Miss Ventura,
does not define who we are.

What defines us is
how well we rise after falling.

I think you'll make
a wonderful manager someday.

And it's been my great honor
to have worked with you.

Marisa?

Marisa! Caroline! Marisa!
I don't know which name to use.

Marisa.

I-I don't get it.
What just happened?

What don't you get?
I'm the maid.

What was all this, some kind of...
some kind of bet?

A little game of what, get-the-guests?

No! Look, I was tryin' on
her clothes, and then you were there

and you invited me out
and everything...

That's why you-you thought you had
to lie to keep me interested?

Who's kiddin' who here?

You think you would've taken a second look
at me if you knew I was the maid?

- Well...
- Come on.

With all due respect for
your big-hearted politics,

I don't think so, Mr. Assemblyman.

How would you know?
You didn't give me a chance.

You stand on your soapbox, judging
everyone, so sure that they're judging you.

And you think they're not?

Come on. Half the time, I'm
some stereotype that they're makin' fun of.

The other half of the time, I'm just invisible.
You know what? Maybe that's the point.

The first time you saw me, I was cleaning
your bathroom floor, only you didn't see me.

Well, was I supposed to introduce myself
while I'm taking a leak? Come one.

- You can't nail me for that.
- People, people, what are you doing?

Not now, Jerry. Just...

- You better go.
- You might as well be selling tickets.

- No, I don't care.
- You care.

- No. No. No. No.
- Marisa.

I just want the truth.

All right, you want the truth?

There was a part of me
that wanted to see what it felt like...

to have someone like you...
look at me the way you did, just once.

And I'm sorry. Truly.

If I could rewind the past week,
I would.

Was any of it real?

Yeah, it was real.

It was so real it made me wonder
how I was ever gonna give you up.

But I had to give you up.
That was the plan.

And then...

last night...

I couldn't.

Rosalie from personnel called.
We expected you hours ago.

Hi, baby.

She told me what happened.

- Hey, ma. You okay?
- Mm-hm.

Scoot over,
let me see your homework.

I don't know what to say.

What are we gonna do for dinner?
You hungry, sweetie?

- Will you look at me?
- No. I'm gonna take a bath.

Don't, mom.

What were you thinking,
going out with someone like that?

Someone... like what?

Chris Marshall.

You had to pretend to be somebody else
so that he would go out with you?

Where is your pride, Marisa?

People like you make people
like him some kind o' god.

Why, because he's rich? He's ehite?
He has things that we don't have,

that we don't even
wanna dream about?

It must really burn you that I think
I have the right to go out with him.

You don't.

Ty, go to your room
and finish your homework, please.

- What happened to you?
- Don't speak to me like that.

I am not the one
who lost her job today.

No, I did. I messed up.

Okay? It's all my fault. But you know what?
It's all right. I'm gonna be fine.

Yes, you will because tomorrow
we're going to call Senora Rodriguez.

- She owes me a favor. She has...
- Look, ma, I'm not calling Mrs. Rodriguez, okay?

I love you, okay? I do.
But I don't wanna clean houses.

There's nowhere to go from there.

Hasn't this taught you anything, Marisa?
Wake up, little girl, you have responsibilities.

And they come every month
like clockwork.

You want to end up
back in the projects?

Keep dreaming dreams
that will never happen.

You want to put food on the table?
Call Senora Rodriguez.

You're right, ma.

I'm a good cleaning lady.
I'll start over.

But not with Mrs. Rodriguez.

I'm gonna find a job
as a maid in some hotel.

After some time passes, I'm gonna
apply for the management program.

And when I get the chance
to be a manager...

... and I will, ma. I know I will.

... I'm gonna take
that chance without any fear.

Without your voice
in my head telling me that I can't.

Miss Ventura, did you see this?

- Miss Ventura, how did it start?
- Is it true that he didn't know you were a maid?

- Are you a Beresford perk?
- How long were you involved?

How did they find you out?

Any advice to other maids
looking to trade up?

- Did the Democrats put you up to this?
- Is he a good tipper?

Is it true you're booked
on Larry King Live?

I'm standing in front of
the Beresford Hotel, where yesterday

Senate-hopeful Chris Marshall was
captured on video tape in a lovers' spat

with a woman now identified
as a hotel maid.

Who's kiddin' who here?

You think you would've taken a second look
at me if you knew I was the maid?

- With all due respect...
- Oh, shit.

Oh, my God.

We won't...
We will not be answering...

We will not be taking
any questions right now.

Mr. Marshall will make a statement.

Morning.

I'd like to make a short statement.

And it will be all
that I have to say about this, uh...

this invasion of my privacy.

I happened to meet
Miss Ventura and her son

during my stay
at a hotel in New York.

And we became friends.

There are people from all walks
of life who I count as friends.

And my only regret in this instance
is that one of them, Miss Ventura,

was subjected to the scrutiny
and innuendo of the media

as a result of that friendship with me.

I need these numbers
to be plus 10 percent.

Welcome to the employee cafeteria.

It's open 24 hours a day...

Please.

Is today the 19th?

Six more shopping days.

He's here. He's back!

- Who? What you reading?
- Yesterday's paper. Chris is in town.

So? Go put your clothes on.
It's late.

So? He's giving a press conference.
Guess where?

I don't care. Okay? Come on.
Put your turtleneck on too. It's cold.

At your hotel.

- Ma!
- What?

- At your hotel!
- I heard you, bubba!

Don't you think it's weird?
You'll be there, he'll be there...

And so will a thousand other people.
I thought we talked about this.

You have your
turtleneck on backwards.

You know,
I thought we talked about this.

I know, but it's like fate.

No, it's like New York City
and an available conference room.

You knew, didn't you?

You weren't gonna tell me.
You knew he was coming.

Remember, bubba, what I told you?
We talked about this.

He's not part of our lives,
but we wish him luck with his, right?

You think he misses us?

Well, he'd be crazy not to.

Mr. Marshall, if elected,
you'll be the third Marshall

to serve New York State
in the Senate. How does it feel?

If I get elected, I'll let you know.

Did your father
leave you any advice?

Yeah, he said, "Don't run".

Okay. We have time
for one more question, folks.

Then we have a meet-and-greet
in the Green Room, if that's okay with you.

I have a question.

- What? Who said that?
- Mr. Marshall, down here.

Oh. Sure.

What's your question?

I was wondering...

- Chris, don't do this.
- No. Wait. I'm listening. Go ahead.

Well...

I know everyone makes mistakes.

And it's a sign of character to give
a person a second chance, right?

Right. I'm with you.

Even if someone lied,
they should be forgiven.

Otherwise, we'd never have
any congressmen or presidents.

Okay, thanks very much, son.
We have to wrap this up.

Jerry, he's not done. Go on.

Well, what if you're not a politician
trying to do good for everybody?

What if you're just a regular person,
like a... maid or something?

And she made a mistake.

Do you think she should get
a second chance?

- I mean, nobody's perfect, right?
- No. Nobody's perfect.

Ladies and gentlemen of the press,
take a look at a future candidate.

All right, thanks very much, folks.
We'll see you all in Buffalo.

- Don't do this. Don't throw it all...
- I'm just trusting my instincts here.

- Great speech.
- Really?

- Eating out of your hands.
- Thanks.

Cool.

Where is she?

This way!

- Have you seen Marisa Ventura?
- No, I haven't seen Marisa.

We haven't had
a story like this in a while.

It's gonna kill his career.

Will this hurt
your announcement for senator?

Mr. Marshall, are you still seeing her?
Was it love at first sight, Mr. Marshall?

- Marisa?
- Hey, ma.

- Marisa?
- Hey, ma.

Ty? What are you both
doing down here? What's...?

Hello.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Oh, look, uh...

Can we start over?
Second chance, second date?

You as you, me as me.
No secrets.

What do you think?

- Mr. Marshall, we know you're in there!
- Open up! Only one way out.

Marisa Ventura.

Housekeeping.

Chris Marshall.
Candidate for Senate.

I'd appreciate your vote.

We'll see.

We're in!

Mr. Marshall, over here!

Mr. Marshall!

Mira.

Esa es mi hija.

Mr. Marshall,
what's your relationship

- with the Latin community?
- Excellent. He speaks Latin... Spanish.

Miss Ventura, you gonna
hep clean up the Senate?

What do you think, sir?
You two got a chance? Sir?