M15F1T5 (2013) - full transcript

This is an experimental Narrative movie. Although not a religious story, we (the writers) referred to a haunting question from our Christian upbringing; "what if Jesus came today". So we started writing the story with consideration of how exactly this miracle worker might be documented and possibly even followed one day. For starters, this particular messiah is gay.


♪ State of the union

♪ And uh

♪ State of confusion

♪ Whoa whoa

♪ That keeps me
Up at class one ♪

The most exciting thing
about 2012

was that we were
finally graduating

from children to adults.

The planet belonged to us now,

and we decided
to make some changes.

We called ourselves,
"The Tribe".

In the smallest,
poorest town in Texas,

it's difficult
to change the world

without the cops getting
involved somehow.

One, two, three.
Is that good?

MAN: Sit in the chair.

Do we have sound?

MAN: Yeah.

MAN: Sit in the chair.


MAN: I think he's
a little taller.

I'm kinda nervous.

MAN: Yeah?


MAN: Hold up the card.

It's, uh, M15, right?

MAN: Yeah.

And the county number,
state initial,

and our file number.

Kinda' funny we never
done this before,

you know,
a felony case?

Oh, you think it's funny.

I mean,
not like funny,

like ha-ha, ha.

Don't worry.

I've done plenty
of real crime investigations

when I worked
in Tarrant County.

Including murder?

Oh, yeah.

Lots of them,

Does this look okay?

Like your fives,
they look like S's.

Oh, well.

Okay, just forget it,
all right?

Just hold up the card
and read

the file number
out loud please.

This is file number


Both my parents died
before I knew them.

I was in foster care
until my real grandmother

tracked me down
and adopted me at age 13.

She died a year later,

so I moved in
with my uncle, Levi

and his girlfriend, Sharon.

Fuck if I know
what that is.

Let me see.

Hey, that fucking thing
turns all the way around,
I didn't know that.

Casey, I think
it's your old school, dear.

CASEY: No, not at all.

He likes that used shit.

It's not even high-resolution.

What's that called?

Hi-def, high definition,

CASEY: I like it a lot.

that's it.

'Kay, 'kay.

Oh, wait, guys.

CASEY: I'm gonna make
a documentary

of our mission trip
and film everything.

It's tape, not film.

And don't narrate like
all those assholes,

those fucking stupid...

CASEY: Yeah, I know.

This is really cool,
Uncle Levi.

And it's...

Now that summer was here,
The Tribe had voted

to take a trip
and find some land

to buy and build
a commune like
in the 60's.

We were the only ones
who thought that

was a great idea.

So, I can go on this trip?

You're 18 now,
you can do whatever
you want.

Just think about
the decisions you make.

Fuckin' government
shot them caress,

what do you think
they're gonna' do with you?

It's not a cult.

You ever heard
of Jim Jones?

Those stupid bastards
killed themselves

over that asshole.

It's like a vacation.

We'll be gone
for a couple of weeks.

Just be nice when you talk
to the agent today.

All right?

A lot of people think
they're special, Casey,

but you really are.

I haven't decided yet.

I'm not gonna' get pissed off
on your goddamn birthday.

Just talk to the man,
all right?

Okay, I never said
I wasn't going to.

All right, all right.

Happy birthday to you.


I wanna make sure
we're filming.

It's tape, tape.

What do you think?

Nice cake.

I mean,
is that not perfect?

That is so perfect.

Okay, ready.

Happy bir...

Wait, wait, wait.
Can't sing that song.

It's a copyrighted song.
Casey's making a documentary.

Well what does that have
to do with singing,
"Happy Birthday"?

It's illegal as long
as it's on camera.

Oh, my God,
that is so ridiculous.

If they want some money
from me singing that song,

they can just come
and get it.

It's goddamn in illegal
and we're not singing it,

so sing something else,
you fucking...

Well what else
is there to sing?
"Merry Christmas?"

Oh, I suppose
that's copy-protected too.

As a matter of fact it is,
and the law's the law,

so agree with it.

Well, fine.

I'm just gonna'
make up my own song.

All right, make it up.

Sing your fucking heart out.

Can I just make a fucking wish
and get it over with?

See, you ruined it.

There's your big surprise.

I did not.
I didn't do anything.

Levi said something brilliant.

Just sing your song.

♪ Happy fucking birthday.

♪ Happy fucking birthday
to you.

♪ My boyfriend
Is a great big asshole

♪ And a major
Control freak too. ♪

That was nice,
that was real nice.

I like that.

You're so sick,
I'm done.

I'm so done.



I didn't mean to do that.

All right, I get it.

That hadn't happened
in years.

We upset you,
didn't we?

It's no big deal.

He made me say, fuck.

I can't believe
he made me say

the one word he knows
I can't stand to say

You were singing, aunt.

and he made me say, fuck.

I'm sure that doesn't count.

I'm gonna get it copy,
oh, what's the word,

copy, copy...


Copyrighted. I'm gonna'
copyright my song
and then everybody

will have to pay me
to sing it.

The "Happy Fucking
Birthday" song.

That's exactly what
I'm gonna' call it.

The "Happy Fucking
Birthday" song.

Happy Birthday.


♪ I ain't Lonely baby

♪ But I gotta know your name

♪ I never sleep alone

♪ Got a lot to retain

♪ But I gotta feel your body

♪ Figure your body
Needs just the same ♪

Happy birthday!

Can't you knock?

Hey, I heard you had
a camera in here.

You're making a porno.

It's a documentary.

I wanna' be in it.
I don't care.

You will be.


It can be a gay porno,
I don't mind.

Shut up.



We are now entering
the Casey zone.

Hey, buddy,
what's going on?

Tad, get outta here,
you're gonna' get
my camera wet.

TADPOLE: Okay, okay,
sorry, sorry.


TADPOLE: Hey, whoo,

hey, what big beats
you have, oh.

Tad, Get out

and put my camera back
where I put it.

TADPOLE: Fine, God.

Tadpole was my best friend
in foster care.

When he turned 18,
he left Dallas and found me.

My uncle, Levi was crazy
about this kid,

but he would never admit it.

With more than 450

commercial exhibits
on display,

The goddamn camera
better not be on.

We're making
a documentary.

Have anything
to hide?

Damn it,
turn that shit off.

This is
for medicinal purposes.

It's not on,

it's not on.


Here, sign this.

Nah, I can't sign this.

I'm too intelligent.

What the fuck
are you talking about?

Having an IQ
as high as mine

would make it legally unfair

for me to enter an agreement
with a police officer.

Yeah, well,
it's Casey's house.

He inherited it today, so,

You should probably
have a legal counsel

representing you
any time you speak.

Just for your own protection.

Fucking sign that
before I kick

you out in the streets,
all right?

See, about that,

Casey's the landlord now,

So, um, yeah.

Only he can evict me now.

See how easily confused
you can be?

Tiny little cop brain!

Yeah, I see how
fucking stupid you are.

Yeah, you can't shut up,
can you.


Yeah, there's some robbery
in fucking Gainesville.
They called me in.

God damn it,
I hate this fucking town.



What did you say
to piss her off this time?

We have the same argument

about different shit
every fucking day.

Did I mention Sharon
is a therapist?


♪ The end is coming

♪ Won't be long ♪



We can get some goggles,
here you go, Casey.

We are out here
in the garage with Sharon,

a world-famous psychologist.

Tell us, Sharon.

What are we doing here?

This is how I don't

kill that jerk
in the other room.

Aw, I wanna' kill the jerk
in the other room.




Come here!
That's how you
do these things.

Oh, my god,
that felt so good.

I know, right?
Oh, hey, come on,
try another.

No, no, no, I'm done,
you go for it.

I would now demonstrate
how this works.

This is the face
of angry customer.

SHARON: Angry.
Very angry.



SHARON: That's a good one.

You will now see
how healed I am

of my self-destructive nature.

CASEY: Tad, stop it,
it's not always about you.


CASEY: That was cool!

SHARON: What's going on?

CASEY: I don't know.

CASEY: I was born with a sort
of birth defect.

Levi says my dad had it, too.

Accidentally making shit
fly around the room

is much more embarrassing
than wetting the bed.


State your name
for the record.

Dan Williams.

Last Monday, you came in
and reported

a robbery and murder,
did you not?

It was worse than that.

Nobody was really killed,

nothing was really stolen.

That's what's so evil
about it.

Danny, this is
a criminal investigation.

Stick to the facts.


Why don't you tell us
about Levi Mattson.

When we were kids,
he lived across
the street.

Who lives there now?

A man they call, Brick.

And this girl they call,
Preacher Boy,

and a rude kid.

Forget what they call him.

It's a whole cult.

Preacher Boy is a girl?

I think so, yes.

I don't know exactly.

Did you witness any abuse?

Was it devil-worship?

Okay, fine.

Tell us first what
happened with Casey.

Was there,

some sort
of sexual attraction?

Me and Casey?


They poisoned me.

Danny, he's of legal age.

From the tape,
it looks like you got drunk,

renounced Jesus,
and went back
to your old ways.



Come on.

Aw, man, look at that.

Our star witness
is a basket case.

Turn that thing off.

Looks like your
botched casserole.


Oh, God.

It's my camera
and you've taken control
of it since I got it.

TADPOLE: You can still make
your documentary,

I'm just trying
to make it marketable.

You know?

I don't care, whatever.

Do what you want.


TADPOLE: So, I decided,

for tomorrow's scene,
we're gonna' have a car chase.

A car chase.


TADPOLE: In this town.
A car chase.

That sounds
like a great idea.

You wanna go run that
by Levi, or should I?

He should be a part of it.
Ooh, cops.

We could do something
like Cops, too.

Instead of make it dumb
and retarded.

And we need lots of women.

Women, women, women.

Yeah. I agree.

So, because I'm in charge
of this camera,

I'm gonna' do something,
don't freak out,

but it's gonna involve me
getting out of the car.



CASEY: That was fun.

TADPOLE: Probably flipping
shit right now

'cause I'm out here
with a camera.

Oh, look, it's a house.

I love this place.

WOMAN: Hi, Casey.


Happy birthday, Casey.


MAN: Hey, if it isn't
the new landlord.

Yeah, you better clean up
all this shit,

or I'm gonna evict
all you fags.

MAN: You sound a lot
like the old landlord.

Is that your birthday present?

CASEY: Yeah.

Tad's sensitive.

What happened?

MAN: Uh, somebody took out one
of the wind turbines.

They missed the
solar panels though.

So there's, that.

CASEY: You need any help?

Nah, it's pretty much trashed.

I'm coming down.

We got a lot to do today.

Brick was the first person

to ever tell me that my

defect was actually a gift.

Just to the windmill?

Who would do that, man?

CASEY: Don't know.

Those cops, they hate us.

Especially your uncle.

CASEY: That isn't true.

Or your boyfriend
across the street.


Why don't you use
your mind control shit

and make
that asshole disappear.

Did anyone get eggs yet?

CASEY: Don't think so.

God, look at this stuff,

So dry.

Look, if we had goats,
we wouldn't have
to waste all this.

It's rotten.

Seven days straight
of 105 degrees.


So, we taking
the chickens with us?

CASEY: Don't know.


The cops are coming!

Guys, the cops are here!


But, Ray, I didn't follow
his report.

Yeah, and I bet
you guess he did.

Danny Williams.


That's Nancy.

Yeah. She described the car
and the kid completely.

It did not take me long
to figure this out.

Who was it?

I don't, I don't think...

Miss Nancy, who was it?

That little son
of a bitch has the nerve

to park right
in front of my house.

He took the bricks right out
of my god damn yard.

Oh, yeah?

He zipped across my yard,

hit behind that bush,

and zipped out to the middle
of the street

and threw it like this here,

like a god damn quarterback.

You say he zipped.

Zipped, zipped.

Uh, after he threw the brick,
did he zip back to his car?

That little son
of a bitch zipped his ass.

Thank you, Miss Nancy.

We really appreciate
your looking out for us.

Thank you. Miss Nancy.

CASEY: Does my uncle
know yet?


Hey, Ray,
is it legal to...

pretend to arrest somebody,

then give them the chance
to apologize instead?

Uh, I don't think it's legal,
but I'll do it.

You want me
to bring him here?

Yeah, it'd be great.

Um, so are we all gonna'
have any more sales later?

Hey, Casey,
I think that'll work for

your dolls collection.

What've we got going on?

BRICK: Same old.
Wanna give us a hand?



We can fix it up,
make it work.





Ah, I want this
in my room.

No. You need it
for your room.

What's that supposed
to mean?

You're filthy.

I am in a dumpster.


It just needs another filter.



I don't know if we can use
anything else in here.

Yeah, that's good enough
for today, let's go.

Don't forget your cap.

WOMAN: You can't make
yourself happy

with your stuff.

What we think
of as our life

Tadpole, you're late.

WOMAN: What we think
of as our life

is actually just a series
of events

and how we are
affected by them.

That effect is influenced

by our beliefs and thoughts.

When you change
what is inside

the outside also changes.

This is is a basic law
of nature,

just like gravity.

MAN: You're going to hell.

I see we have a prophet
in the crowd.

Yeah, yeah.

Bible says that you
and all your little
faggot friends

are going to hell.

Thank you for the warning.

You're welcome.

I'll look for that verse.

For the record,
I think it's

fine to believe in a book,

as long as it's one
that you've read.

MAN: Whatever, fag.

It's time
for our top ten list.

Today's topic is how
to be a miserable fuck.

This is an important part
of life in America

so listen up.

Number one.

Believe everything you hear.

Especially if it's on TV.

Number two.

Never be original.

Just copy what
everyone else is doing,

it's much easier.

Number three.

Spend a great deal

of energy destroying

and everyone
that you don't understand,

ostracizing anyone
who's different than you.

If you can arrest
or kill them,

even better.

This will guarantee a dull,

safe world for us all.

Number four.

Don't learn from history.

It's much easier to wallow
in a destructive shithole

and call it tradition.

Number five.

Never ever

take responsibility
for your own actions.

Be sure and teach this
to your children

and blame the schools,

the government,

and the movies.

Number six.

Grab and protect what
is rightfully yours

and never share it.

Number seven.

Always remember
the mean things

people say and do to you.

See ya later!

Replay these scenes

over and over
in your head

and try to feel
as hurt as you can.

It feels bad but it is
at least predictable.

Number eight.

Eat and drink
everything you crave,

and buy your children
candy every day.

And load up
on chips and sodas.

Number nine.

You must believe
in a cruel

and angry God

that judges everyone
by a set of rules

that are impossible
to live by,

and punishes us
when we can't follow them.

Make sure your God
is a man, too,

no girly gods allowed.

Make sure he hates
certain people

but loves people




Make sure he has picked

some special,

chosen person

to tell you how
to think and live.

Number ten.


Buy lots of stuff!

Get everything
you want right now!

Don't worry if you need it
or have any money for it,

just get it and get it now.

If you follow these simple

ten commandments of misery,

you will not only
make your own life

into a living nightmare,

but you will spread this
until the entire Earth

becomes a dark
and dangerous place.

Just like the almighty man,
God said it would be.

Thank you for listening
and not calling the cops.

I will be gone next week,

but will return
at the same time

the following week.

Good day.


Casey, what's with
the fucking camera?



Did you see that crowd?
Bunch of idiots.

Now you understand
why I do it?

It's not wrong
to have a gift.

How do you know Babe Ruth
or Mickey Mantle

didn't have the same gift
that you have?

Pretty sure they didn't.

Not even gonna'
say anything.

That woman back there
is right up our ass.

BRICK: Oh, my goodness
she is goin' crazy.

I spent sometime lately,

thinking about things
that happened to me,

a long time ago.

WOMAN: That's crazy.


Sorry about that.


This lady is freaking out.

Tad, do not antagonize her.

Or whatever my reaction
to the pain was...



♪ And you think I had enough


♪ Honey, I'm too damn tough

I know, Tad,
and you keep going.


♪ I'm never gonna go,
I'm never gonna go

♪ Go away

BRICK: Stay put.

You're not about
to go to her, right?

Stay in the truck,
stay in the truck.

♪ I search for the best

♪ You don't know how I feel

CASEY: Stay put.

♪ To hope for something real


LADY: What the fuck
do you think you're doing?

BRICK: You all right?

LADY: Yeah,
of course I'm all right.

now I gotta' sit through
another mother-fucking signal.

Get the fuck back
in your piece of shit truck

and go, go, git!

BRICK: Hey, guys, I got this.
Get back.

LADY: What the fuck.

What the fuck is wrong
with you kids?

You stop in the middle
of the goddamn road.

I'm not going
anywhere until I'm sure
you're gonna' be okay.

That you're not going
to have a breakdown

or something.
You seem a little edgy.

A little edgy.

Just a little bit.

A little edgy.

Just, just.
All right.

How bout I fucking slap you
to god damn next week,

you snot nosed
son of a bitch.

Whoa, this is not

about the traffic light,
is it.

Oh, fuck you,
I'm gonna fuckin kill you,
you son of a bitch.

Whoa, this has been building
up for a while, hasn't it?

Oh, fuck you.


I'm gonna' fuckin' kill you.

Hey, whoa.

Just talk to me about it.

Fuck you. You fucker,
I'm gonna' fucking kill you.

I'm gonna kill you,
you fucker,
you lil' piece of shit.

That's what you are,
you're a piece
of fucking shit.

Just fuck you.

You're hurting, okay?

So, just talk to me
about it.

I'm gonna
fucking kill you.

Talk to me about it.


♪ Never gonna go away ♪

Thank you.
Let's jump to the next song.


You know what?

I get mad too sometimes.

I don't even know why.

I mean, one time,
I got so mad,

I was mad for three days,
I couldn't eat.

Couldn't sleep.

I can't sleep either.

I threw up my lunch today.

It's not fair.

♪ That's how it goes

I was married
for 20 years.

I did all the things
I was supposed to do.

I've never been
a bad person.


I know.

I had...

I had the perfect life.

I had...

I don't know
what happened.

♪ Oh, I'm so lonely ♪


You're a member
of the universe,

just like everybody else,

and you deserve everything

of your desires.

Look, sitting in the middle
of the street, crying.

It's pathetic.




I think it's hilarious.

I want you
to go home tonight,

look up at the sky,

find a star,
just stare at it.


Realize that you're made up
of the same stuff

that star is,
that big ball of fire

flying through the universe.

It's just like you.


That's true.

Isn't it?

Oh, yeah.

Where the fuck
do all these people

think they're going,


Thanks, kid.

I'm Sherry.

Who're you?


Call me Brick.

'Cause I'm stubborn.

You guys do those yard
sales every week,
don't you.

BRICK: Yeah.

Bought a blender
there once.

It still works great.

Forty-five-hundred firm,
and that means firm.

Great shape.

Diesel, runs on grease.

Runs good.

About how many

firm offers do you say
you've had today

for this piece of shit?

You know,
I got $1500 here
that says

that not a single
person has come by

and seen this worthless rust.

Keys and title,
1500 bucks,
sounds good to me.

I can't do it for less
than $3000.

Doesn't have
any rust on it.

Nobody cares
about bio-diesel anymore.

Let's go to Nocona.


I can do $1500
since it's cash.

CASEY: We'll pick it up
in the morning.

Let's get this cleaned up.

Are you sure?

Yes, I'm fine.

I need to do this.


Have you even
seen the tape?

Uh, yes we have,

and that's why we're here,

to unpack some of this.

Something evil
is going on.

Yes, Danny, we know.

This is a very dangerous cult,

led by a very dangerous man.

And at least
a dozen kids are missing.

I'm ready.


Let's go back to the time
when your parents

filed a complaint against
a 21-year-old male,

Eli Mattson.


How old were you then?

I was 16.

And what was
that all about?

Eli was evil.

He was a sodomite.

And what did you do?

I was sent
to the St. Thomas Center.

And he...

You had homosexual sex

with a 21-year-old man.

You were then sent
to a Christian

behavioral modification

A program that
you successfully completed,


Are you still a sodomite?


Something that's just
not making sense to me,

I'm cured, I swear.

Eli Mattson got 20 years.

it became a life sentence,

didn't it?


I didn't do anything.

I was the innocent one.


Is that throwing-up thing,

is that part
of your treatment?




♪ About my life

♪ Now I feel

♪ About being where I am

When I was fifteen,

Levi had this great idea
to teach me baseball.

He soon realized
it helped me concentrate.

I almost completely stopped
having the episodes.

I should have never joined
the school team, though.

Agents from the big leagues
started showing up

from all over the country.


♪ I was sleeping the day away

♪ So I save it for
The blue moon

Son, it's a real pleasure
to meet you.

So, what do you think
of this car?

Pretty sweet.

You know, I would love it
if you could drive it.

If you wanna' sign
with the team


Un-fucking believable.

♪ And I said goodbye to

♪ A lot of friends

♪ And a lot of lovers

♪ That I never got to love

♪ Tryna' keep my head up
In this cloud of dust

♪ Keeps on


♪ From above


♪ I can feel the sun shine ♪

TADPOLE: Hey, guys.

Who's watching the store?

Preacher Boy and Streak.

We can't get it to charge
a full charge anymore.

Here, hold this.

Casey blew a breaker
in his house this morning.

I put a reset button
right here.

GIRL: Nice.

These are lithium
ion batteries.

Not like your normal
car batteries.

The one I got
in the back,

it's a lithium oxide cobalt

GIRL: Fine, you're smart.

We all agree.

Actually, I'm a genius.

Okay, genius,
if you got this,

then I'm gonna'
go finish working
on that body.



You wanna be in
the film I'm directing?


Why not?
You'd be perfect for the lead.


You can't do a movie
without a script.

You don't have a script.

TAD: It's more
like improvisation.


I know what this is about.

You just wanna see my tits.

TAD: That would be
a good selling point

for distribution.

Now, we can be honest.

All that good movie
was showing flesh.

But it needs artistically
rateable, okay?

You touch me,
and I will slap the genius

right out you.

TAD: Sorry.

You can work on a script
with a good story.

I will do a fuck scene,

I promise
I'll take it all off.

If you promise you won't do
that crap with the sheets

while I just went
and covered everything?

That never happens.

She gets him around
on the bed anymore, usually.



it's like, ooh, fuck me.


Ooh! Shit!
That feels good!

Skin flapping against skin!

Scratching her fingernails
down his back,

wailing, grabbing my nipples
and pulling him on top
right there screaming,

"Fuck me, big daddy!

Slam that pole up my soft,
warm, and fuzzy place!"


Now that's a sex scene
I will do.

Tad, what are you doing?

Tad, what,
Are you okay?

TAD: Hey lady.

Hi, I'm-my name is Tadpole.

What's your name?
Wanna come over tonight?

Okay, all right.

TAD: Sup guys.

Look who it is.

Hey sexy, bow chicka
wow wow, yeah,

look at her.

TAD: Oh, shit.

Oh, you got busted.


Dude, you're screwed.

Arrest him.

What happened, Officer?

What happened?

Ha ha ha,

I got you, didn't I?

Oh, you had me going there,

I thought you were
really pulling me over.

Oh hell, I saw my nephew
riding with you.

I knew he was gonna'
sign with you boys.

Well, he hasn't signed
with us yet.

But we have made him
one hell of an offer.

TAD: How much is it?

It's a few, sir.

Casey, how much is it?


Who's this, Casey?
Your kid brother?

Turn that off.

The pitch.

This is it?
For only one year?

Uh, no sir, no.

That's just
the sign-in bonus.

That there,

That's the five-year deal.


Oh, it's gotta be good,
it's gotta be good.

I get ten percent,
ten percent.

Holy fucking shit,
Holy fuck.

TADPOLE: I need a maid,
and a car, and a pony.


I'm so proud of you,
ah, shit.


All right, all right,
all right.

Wait, um,
here. Yeah!


Okay, I'll pull you
over later. All right?

LEVI: Hey, and Casey,
we'll talk.

I love you, I love you,
talk to you later.

Turn it off, now.


You look like a bellboy.

You wanna be in my porno?

Okay, all right,

TAD: Ooh, ooh.

Lovebirds in action, oh.

LADY: So, you believe
in God then?

TADPOLE: Fall in love.

Sneak up behind them

BRICK: There's a lot of forces
in the universe that,

you know, are beyond
our understanding.

It's only natural
that we would have

a reverence for,
what is that, worship,

I don't know.

Maybe there is only one
unilateral power behind it.

So, you believe in
an intelligent being.


Is that
the definition?

My boy is growing up.

I think how inseparable
we are from it.

And, the power
it holds over us,

and we have to learn
to use that like

a ship uses the currents
and the winds.

Get outta' here.

Hey, let's,
maybe we should get some air.


Oh yeah, that's my boy.

Yeah, work it, yeah.

Well, lookee there,
it does work.

Miss Nancy.

Did you ever buy anything
we didn't guarantee?

Young man,
did I give you permission
to film me?

Uh, Miss Nancy.

He needs
to test the camera,

to make sure it works.

'Cause you know,
if it doesn't work,

we can't sell it.

I'll give you three bucks,
that's all I have.


If it doesn't sell for five,
I'm gonna' keep it for myself.


You know what, actually,
I should mark it up to ten,

just to make sure
it works.

What? No.

Oh, that's not right.

Now look,
it's clearly marked
five dollars.

And you can't change
the price

just because somebody
said they wanted it.

That's not right.

I want it for the price
that's marked.

I'm sorry,
you're right.

I shouldn't be
so greedy.

Five bucks it is.


Five, ten.

Nice doing business
with you.

♪ Breaking souls
And blowing in the wind

I didn't see them yesterday,

Really nice,
I love all these.

About five.

I don't know.
This one looks
a little, um,

what's the word, um,


Yeah, vintage.

Nah, they're just old
and dusty.

Perfect for smashing.

Well, I want all these.

I want all
these two tubs,

and if you have any more,
I want 'em all.

You can box 'em up
for me,

I really, really like those.

And I am prepared
to pay for these two cups.

TAD: Hey, guys, the cops.

C'mon, take the camera.





♪ I'm never going back

♪ I'm leaving Fayetteville ♪

All right.

What you gonna say?

I don't know.

You don't know,

then we're gonna'
go back downtown.


Who am I saying this to?

How about you start with

all these fine people

in the neighborhood who
were affected by your

cowardly act.

Chicken shit.

Okay, everybody.

I'm sorry for what I did.

Be specific, man.

I'm sorry for
throwing those bricks

at your house last night.

And I'm sorry
for putting holes
into the tire

of your truck.

For shooting your windows
with my BB gun,

for calling Casey a fag
at school,

and for hiding
the uniform before

the state championships
last year.

TAD: Dick.

I'm sorry, man.

RAY: All right, here.

Tell them what
you're gonna' do

in order to tryna
make it right

for all the stuff
that you've done.

I'm gonna pay y'all back.

Well, you can start
by taking those bricks

back to Miss Nancy's yard
where you found them.

Then you can come
back over here

and help us out when
you're done, okay?

RAY: You say yes,
I'll take the handcuffs off.




♪ Bite my tongue

♪ I'm staring into a mirror

I'll kick your ass.

C'mon, man.



Cool it.

I forgive you.

♪ Bleed out my black and blue

♪ Close my eyes and disappear

♪ Oh, when they open wide

♪ My soul just cannot hide

♪ I can't bore this feelings

♪ Oh, my darling

♪ I won't sing

♪ I can lay with you this way

♪ Oh, my darling

♪ I'll help you see

♪ You know we're fucked up

♪ But we're meant to be

♪ No tragedy
There's no tragedy

♪ There's no tragedy ♪

She's cool,
I'll vouch for her.

TAD: Are you at least 18?

Yeah, you know me,
of course I'm at least 18.

I'm gonna need proof
on file.

I need to see your ID.


Yeah, I'm gonna have
to scan this in my system.

I'll get it
back to you.

What else?

You're gonna' need
to crossdress tonight
for the meeting.

It's for Casey's birthday.


And you're gonna' need
to journal,

and you're gonna' need
to meditate for at least

fifteen minutes
every morning.

But don't worry,
we'll teach you this
as you go along.

Any questions?

Yeah, uh.

You mentioned something
about a crossdress.

Do you mean like a dress
with a cross on it?

He means you
dress like a boy.

Yeah, all the dudes
dress like chicks

and the chicks
dress like dudes.

Not every day, man,
just for MC's birthday.

Does that mean I get
to wear boy's undies?

Like, the little white ones.

If you want to.


I'm making a porno.


I'll be in it.

Can I see the camera?

I can see your DP, man.

You know,
I made a lot of videos.

Yeah? This is my first time

I'm more of like,

out in front
of the camera type.

Me too!


Hey, gotta see this ass.

It was made for the movies.

I see what you're saying.

Check this out.


Whoo, whoo!

That's ridiculous.

Why do you do this?

All right,
I'm sorry.


When I moved here
at age 13,

I started hearing stories
about how

Danny Williams caused
my father's death.

And when The Tribe
started dumpster diving,

recycling, and having
frequent yard sales,

he called the cops
on us almost every day.

Um, well he was 16 when
I was born so that's

TADPOLE: Thirty-four.

CASEY: Yeah.

TAD: So, he should definitely
know how to wash a car.

I mean, look at it.

I should go over there
and wash it.

Maybe he could pay you.

TAD: Ah, dude, yeah.

I think that's
how I'll ask him
to be in my film.

Hey, man

TADPOLE: What is he doing?


TAD: Oh, my God.

CASEY: I need
to make this one.

I, just, here, take this.

TAD: Okay.

TAD: What are we doing?

What are you gonna' do?

CASEY: I'm just gonna',
you know.

See if I can,
pull his clothes off.

TAD: Oh, I see

I see his wick rick!

I see his wicker!
Oh, my God.


Gotta' concentrate,
come on.

TAD: Sorry.

TAD: Dude. We gotta' get it
all the way down.

Take his pants
all the way down.


I need the money shot.
I need the money shot.

CASEY: Okay.

TAD: Goin', goin', goin',
goin', goin'.


CASEY: Oh, oh no.

He's getting it in his face,
oh, my god.


TAD: Hey, Danny.

About five years ago
or so

I did some
pro bono counseling

at a children's home
in Dallas County.

I met Lisa Mattson

who was looking
for a particular child,

and she adopted him
with my help.

I later moved here,

because I started
dating her son, Levi,

and we've lived
here ever since.


All right, um.

What do you know about

these cult leaders?

They go by the aliases,
Preacher Boy and Brick?

Cult leaders,

Indulge me.

Preacher Boy
and Ted Polk came
from the same

children's home as Casey
and Brick said once

he used to work
on Wall Street

but I don't know
anything else about him.

Never got a name
on a document?

No, it was all
very informal,

just after Lisa died.

Why do you think
he goes by a fake name?

Tim, all the kids
have nicknames,

and, uh, Mighty Casey
loves baseball and the poem

and Tadpole is small
and defenseless,
and Streak,

as you well know,
runs naked through

the Fourth of July parade.

Every year since puberty.


What about this cult group?

I've got a dozen complaints
from families

that say their kids
are running off with this guy.

Well, I think it's more
like a club of misfits

all the same age.

We are tribal by nature
and young people especially

just want to belong
to a group.

They want to be loved.

I think these complaints
you're getting

are completely unfounded.

I have a list
of names here.

The Grand Jury will be meeting
on this next week

to determine
if it's kidnapping or not.

If it is,
charges will be brought.

At the very least,
it's a missing persons case.

I also have
a statement about

the amount of blood found
in the home,

along with
the video evidence

provided by Dan Williams.

Which will also be read
by the Grand Jury.

It's a case of murder,
or attempted one.

And this document

is about three fugitives
from justice

in the company
of your boyfriend's

18 year old nephew,

which may also be named
as an accomplice.

That sounded like
a threat.

I believe you know
where they are.

What will you do then?

We will apprehend
the fugitives,

have a few words
with this Brick fellow,

and confirm the safety
of all the members

of this little club
of misfits.

Could I have
a drink of water?



What's the score?

CASEY: No score.

You sign with anybody yet?

They tried to give me a car.

And a lot of money,

from the way
Levi was screaming.

You didn't take it.

You're lying
or you're stupid.


Sure was a nice car.

Yeah, it was.

I didn't sign with anybody.

What team is he with?

It doesn't matter.

You know, baseball
was Levi's idea
on helping me focus.

I never wanted
to be good at it.

I just wanted
to stop making shit fly
around the room

every time I had
a stray thought.


The Rangers do need
a good pitcher.

Man, that was
a nice car.

Guys, guys,
you gotta' film me,
you gotta film me!

CASEY: It's tape, not film.

What's up?

I just caught that girl
over there stealing!

So what?

This stuff isn't ours anyway,

remember, we found it.

Come on, please?
I just wanna get it on tape.

Please, Casey, Please.

Zoom in from here.

I'm listening to the game.

It'll just take a second,
I'll show you.

Who is she?

I don't know.

I've never seen her before.

I'll do it.
Is it okay, MC?


Okay, go go.

Come on, you ready?

Watch this.


Do you need any help?

No, I'm just looking
at things.


You're not from
around here, are you?


My name's Tadpole.

That's a stupid name.

Hey, uh, do you want me
to put some of that stuff

on the counter
for you while you shop?

No, I'm just looking,

Okay, well, I mean,

I thought I'd just be
a little uncomfortable

with all that shit
crammed up your shirt.

Look, you little shit.
Back off.

Okay, okay.

I just wanted you
to know about our policy,
you know,

we don't really believe
in stealing.

So, if you really want it,
you can have it, I mean,

the way we look at it,

this stuff isn't really ours.

This thing, I don't even,

I don't even know where
I got that, you know?

So I mean,
if you really want it,
you can just take it,

you don't have
to be secret about it.

I was just, you know,
I was thinking

Hey, what's going
on over here?

Whoa, that is a cool tattoo.

What kind of fun is that?

Don't touch me.


This little shit accused me
of stealing.

Hey, we don't steal, man.

Well, I mean, hey.

That's what I was telling
the girl with

the CD stuff crammed
up her shirt.

Why don't you shut up.

Hey, sir.

You listen here.

If you're gonna' hit me,

I like to be hit
and fucked
at the same time.

Feels really good
when they're together.

It's called synergy.

The fuck is wrong
with you, boy.

Oh, come on. I know
you have fond memories
of prison rape.

Hey, look, I'm gonna'
give you one chance

to apologize for
that little mouth of yours.

You understand me.

Does this mean
you're not gonna' fuck me?

LADY: Kick his ass, baby.


Hit him again.

That was awesome, okay.

What's up,
where you going, punk?




ONLOOKER: Go, Preacher!

What the fuck, really?

Is that too much
for you?

You son of a bitch.

PASSERBY: Ooh. Nice.

THUG: Whoa, dammit.



Go, go, go, get 'im!

We can go inside,
and you know...


Kick his ass, kick his ass.

STREAK: Get him!

Ooh, right in the nuts.

Watch this.

Stop it.


You're dead.

Fucking dead.

TAD: Bring it on,
let's go.


I don't want
your fucking apology.

Then give her anything
she wants.

I don't want your shit,
stupid shit.

Everything if she wants it.

I don't want your shit.




TAD: Christ!

Sorry, I didn't mean it.

BRICK: Yes, you did!

Is this your...

What just happened?

Is this your gift?

You fucking motherfuckers.

Cut a piece of his throat.

You know,
we waste so much time

trying to

rearrange the world
to serve us

but it's exactly the
other way around.



You motherfuckers are dead,
all of them.

You son of a bitches.

This is bullshit.

You all are dead.
We're gonna' be back.

We'll be fucking back.

Fucking weirdos.

Danny came
to see me one time

in my private practice,
a few years ago,

but he never came back.

Why not?

I don't know.

Is that all?

Well, I know he carries
a lot of guilt and shame.

About Eli.

About everything.

Do you have any idea
what they did to him
at that place?

It is a reputable facility.

Then you're
terribly misinformed.

Danny Williams claims

that something evil was going
on in that house.

And then he gives us
a tape that shows,

amongst other
obscene things,

an apparent gunfight.

And you believe him?

I wasn't there.

I wanna' tell you
about that video.


Casey and his friends
were very creative,

and inventive,
and they did some tricks
with the camera.

They told me all about it
and Levi and I played along.

I hope you're not taking
this too seriously.

It was just camera tricks.

You could see
that everybody walked
away uninjured.

Uh, yeah, well,

we have watched the tape,
but there...

I would like the camera
and the tapes back.

Don't make me file
a lawsuit over this.


I can give you the camera,

but the tapes are evidence.

Evidence of what?

The joke of a crazy man
that went too far?

It is clear
to me that blood
was shed.

Do you even have
any DNA matches?

Was it even human blood?

I know your county budget.

So don't even pretend
you spent thousands

doing a blood analysis.

We can have it tested.

Oh, come on.

You drive your own cars

with lights
and sirens you bought
on Ebay.

This is one
of the poorest

and I mean poorest counties
on the map.

I need the three
armed robbery suspects.

And I need Brick.

And I also need
to make sure

that these kids are safe.

Tim, this is just
a hoax by some kids.

Don't embarrass
yourself over this.

Just tell me
where they are

and I will make sure
this is all done fair.

Thank you, Detective,

I'm leaving now,
and I can pick up
the camera

at the front desk?

I'll need
the cell phones too.

We can release them.

MAN: Uh, okay.

I'll bring them
to the front.


The fuck is going on here,

my fucking radio
dispatcher all freaking out

saying goddamn Sodom
and Gomorrah,

fucking shit raining down
from the goddamn sky,
what the fuck.

You can't just make
shit up, Danny,

and have someone
arrested for it.
What did he do?

He's evil!

I saw the hand
of Satan at work!

He says that shit
went flying through
the air and...

I know what
he fucking said.

Who the fuck hit you?

It was an accident.

Levi, you've got
the wrong man
in handcuffs.

I just put him
in handcuffs
till you got here.

That one,
right there,

pulled down his pants
and flashed his privates.

What he's saying just...

You heard me,
I didn't fucking stutter.

He is a son of Satan.

Enough out of you.


Can I say something, Officer?


Come by our meeting tonight.
Find out what we're all about.

LEVI: Why the fuck
would I do that?

I want you
to arrest him
for indecency.

BRICK: Because the best way
to forgive someone is

to sit down with them.

I saw his penis,
plain as day.
I saw his penis.

Miss Nancy,
will you please,

shut the hell up
and go home.

Don't you talk down
to me.

I remember
when you used
to jack off

under the Conley Bridge.

♪ I'm dieing

I don't have anyone
to forgive, all right?

CASEY: I do.

I want you to be there.

♪ Nice and dry ♪

Will you come
to my birthday party tonight?


CASEY: Yeah.


BRICK: If you come by
for a few minutes,

we'll never have
another yard sale.



I guess.

It's my birthday.

Fine then.

What time?


All right,
tell me the truth.

Little burger thing,

mini burger thing,

did it get broken
during all this shit?

Shit! Fuck!

I wanted that!

When I come back here,

this shit better
be fucking clean!

We are here, live,

on this horrific
and horrible scene.

Ma'am, can you tell us
what happened?

Thanks, Casey.

All I gotta' say is thanks
for the mess, Casey.


TAD: Any, anybody.

Sir, can you give us
your official statement.

There is no proof to any
of these charges

that I caused this mess.

I'm innocent until
proven guilty.

Don't talk to the press.

Okay, uh,

can you tell us
about the conspiracy

the events today?

We have no comment.

We believe this was
a natural phenomenon.

You, sir.

Is it true that
the sky is falling

like everybody's claiming?

I believe the sky's angry
at us,

that's why
it sent this debris.

A warning.


Uh, thank you.

Brick said he read about me

in the newspaper
when he lived

in New York City.

He knew enough
about the mathematics
of baseball

to figure something was up.

He was looking for somebody
with the same gift he has,

so he cashed in his stocks

and moved here.

He became my mentor
and friend.

I still don't know
what he does to the water.






♪ Break my heart
And I'll write you a song ♪

CASEY: Does anybody mind
if the camera's taping
during our meeting?

LEVI: Not at all.

ALL: No.

CASEY: Okay.

BRICK: Guys, you know
this is how those

crazy religious traditions
get started, right?


BRICK: Now and for everyone
who's new,

we don't dress in drag
for every tribe meeting.


that's a relief.

For a minute,

Never mind, never mind,
never mind.

Will someone please start
with our real traditions.

All right.

LEVI: Streak.

ALL: Streak.

Like our ancestors
before us,

we believe
in the elements

within the sun,
wind, water,

fire, earth,
and moon.

We are part
of something bigger
than ourselves.

We're not separate
and isolated
from the universe.

Recycle, volunteer,
give things away.

We're self-reliant.

Poverty and hunger
are a shared problem.

Knowledge is
a valued commodity

that is exchanged freely.

and differences
of opinion

make for a balanced Tribe.

People that are different

are welcome
and encouraged.

Never burden
the government

with something that
the Tribe can handle.

ALL: Streak.

All right,
my tribe name is Bean.

ALL: Bean.

And I offer all
the life-giving power

of the water.

ALL: Bean.

My tribal name
is Mighty Casey.

ALL: Mighty Casey.

And I offer all the warmth
and power of fire.

ALL: Mighty Casey.

My, uh,
tribal name is Zippy.

ALL: Zippy.

I want to thank you all
for everything,

and I'm gonna' share
some thoughts
from my journal.

The heaven that many people
are looking for

is going on right now,

if we are paying attention,

we won't miss it.

ALL: Zip, zip.

Instead of throwing
things away,

it's better
to put them
to a new use.

Nature does this.

So, Levi,

how have you been?

What do you want, Tim?

I need to know
about that day,

couple of weeks ago.

What about it?

Levi, your blood
was found splattered

all over your mother's house.

How did your blood

get on the walls
and the floor?

I don't remember.

Do you remember
what happened

to all those kids
there that morning?

Did you know
that tiny subatomic particles

can be in two places
at the same time?

This is a dangerous man.

You said it yourself.

He could've
brainwashed these kids

and God knows
what could happen.

And now,
he's got three dangerous
criminals with him.

We need to find this guy.

If I could explain it
to you, I would.


What happened to you, Levi?

I already told you, Tim.

Me and Sharon went
to Mexico like we planned.

I came back,

turned in my badge,
and went home.

Don't you think it's odd

that a dozen teenagers
who just put

all their cell phones
in a pile

would head off
on some vacation trip


Don't you think
it's odd that a stolen car

is returned to its owner?

With an apology note?

Even stranger that
an investigation
would continue

after the money's
been paid back

and the charges dropped.
C'mon, Tim.

How much are
they paying you
to find him?

The agents?

What do you mean?

I know they wanna'
find Casey.

They got a multi-million
dollar contract

right down there.

They offered me
a generous finder's fee.

How much, Tim?

You can tell me.

Thank you, Levi.

You can go now.

of throwing things away,

it's much smarter
to try to put things
to a new use.

Nature does this.

Admit what went wrong,

forgive everybody
including yourself,

and turn waste

into a meaningful


Oh, man.

That was so weird.



there's not like,
anyone actually,

like, really paying you,
is there?

Don't be stupid, Ray.

They just want
to talk to me.

That's it.


I'm happy you're
being normal.

What do you mean by normal?

Not gay anymore.

I was cured
at the facility.

I have control over
my sinful desires.

Cured from what?

You don't know what
you're talking about.



It's no good.

♪ Come back to me

I wanna dress up.

Everybody else
is dressed up.

Here, I can show you
some clothes back
in the garage.

Come with me.

♪ San Andreas is
A watching sanctuary ♪

I mean, we'll be protecting
the fucking children

You know what we got
is a whole generation

of fat little lazy
fucking bastards.

That's it.

It's crazy man.

The hell is
in this shit.

It's water.

It's some fucking
badass water,
that's for sure.

I'm gonna' get
some more
of this shit.

Be right back.

Here you go.

Hey bartender,
what's up.

Listen up, listen up.

It's such a trip
to be back
in this house again.

I knew your father, Eli.

He had a summer fling
with my best friend.

Sheila Goldman.


Hey, was Casey's mom hot?

Me and my boyfriend Mike

used to drive out
to Hippie Hollow

and get drunk and naked

with Eli and Sheila.

We were all hot
back then.

That's awesome.


We used to do it

all four of us,

on the roof of the school.

Oh, no way.

Where was my camera
when you need it bad?

I have one of the pictures
of her.

I can bring you some.



Derek, What's up?

How you doin'?


You know, I agree with some
of that live and turn stuff,

I just don't necessarily
agree that the free markets

will always
correct themselves,
you know what I mean?

No, man, you have
to give it all back to

the small businesses,
that's who creates jobs.

Yeah, man.
You give too much credit
to the corporation

and not enough love
to the banks.

Fuck the banks.

Yeah, fuck the banks.



♪ Can I be your fool

♪ For a while

♪ I spend all my money
To make you smile

♪ I'm just strumming through

♪ This life

♪ But you make it
All seem worthwhile

♪ I'm playing for kicks

♪ This time

♪ Show me your good intentions

♪ I'll show you mine

♪ Can I be yours,
Truly girl

♪ For a while

♪ Dime hasta el final

♪ I'm just stumbling through

♪ This life

♪ Quam tigo no me porto mal

♪ I'm playing for kicks

♪ This time

♪ Show me your good intentions

♪ I'll show you mine

♪ Can I be your fool

♪ For a while

♪ I spend all my money
To make you smile

♪ I'm just stumbling through

♪ This life

♪ But you make it up
To seem worthwhile

♪ I'm playing for
Kicks this time

♪ Ensename tu corazon

♪ I'll show you mine. ♪


SHARON: I could go
get laid right now

with anybody I wanted to?

LEVI: Yeah, anybody.

WOMAN: No jealously?

Just wild juicy sex
and no Levi?

Just pick somebody,
I don't care.

I could do that.
I could so do that.

I have choices.

I have choices.

I mean, you know,
look, I do.

I could look around
and Lord knows why,

I pick you,

I'm gonna have my way
with you big boy.

With your dreams,
and your dreams.

This is so sweet.


Too many Christians.

It was the Age
of Enlightenment.

You're so right, Bean.

That's what they call you,
right, Bean?

No, it's Deco.

You look good.

Oh, come on guys,
don't I look good too?


Thank you.

Caught in your
little web here.



Sheila was pregnant,

and she was really,
really happy about it.

It was, uh,
everything was so perfect.

And, um, just like that,

all went black.

Eli got sent
to prison over
that stupid kid.

And then,

Sheila died when
the baby was born.

I used to, uh,

used to visit him a lot,
you know.

It was a...


place for him to be.

Um, when I,

when I found out he died,

what they...


I was, I was numb.

Nobody deserves that.

I have a really
short attention span,

so I don't get angry
that often.

Well I was just
suggesting the idea

that you're very, very,

I don't know

Closely related.

It's almost as
if you feed off one another.

So what are you saying?

Bubbles, right?


I just think it's so nice

to have an
intelligent conversation,
don't you?

I have a tingling
in my pussy.


You just got here.


♪ Not my kind of day

♪ You're the silence

♪ Keep all the time past ♪

I always wanted to talk
to you about this.


When my dad found out,

I didn't know
what to say.

He blamed Eli.

You could've told
the truth.

Wouldn't have mattered.

It might have.

When Eli died,

part of me died too,
you know?

Nobody else knows
that but you.

I'm glad you loved him.

I can't hate you now.

You hated me?

Kind of.

Secretly, I thought
you were sort of hot.


TAD: Psst, Bubbles.

Hey, Bubbles.


TAD: Get up, c'mon.


TAD: I've got something.

C'mon, I got something
to show you.

Really, Tadpole?

Right now?

TAD: Yes, please.

Fine, fine.

So, you ever wanted
to be in a movie?

Yeah, but why do I have
to be naked?

It's, it's more like,

artistic nudity.

Um, it represents
the statement

of the theme of the film.

Besides, it's a porno,
we gotta' be naked.

Uh, okay.

You can see my bra,
but that's it.

Now I know what
you woke me up for.



That very, very artistic



now, I'm the hero,

so we gotta' kiss.

I thought you were
the director.

I'm both.

It's like Woody Allen.

Who is that?

Never mind.

Please, stay focused.


Uh, now, I've gotta',

I've gotta' hold you,

uh safe, like this.



Are you okay?

You don't have asthma,
do you?


Well, I think
the sun's coming up,

so I'm gonna' go.

But we can make more
videos tomorrow, okay?

All right, bye.



Hey, get dressed.
Sun's coming up.

Don't you know
how to knock?


We, uh, interrupting

Yeah, it's a, uh,

very dramatic

scene in my film.


You should put me
in your film.


I'm huge, man.

You wanna' see?



That is awesome!

Where were you
five minutes ago?

I love it,
I love it, no,


You gotta' put it back?

All right.


TAD: Casey.



Time for the sun.







Why do we always do this?

Be quiet.

You'll hear it.

I don't hear anything.

Shut up already.

I hear it.

What did it say?

It says I'm here.


DANNY: Do you guys think
that there really
is a God out there?

LADY: I don't know
if God is anywhere.

I think that sometimes.

Like somebody forgot
about us.


Maybe our idea
of God

is in the spaces
between the stars.

What about us?

Maybe God is
in the spaces
between us too.

I like that.







Oh, hey.


TAD: All right.

So, this is the dining area,

where we eat,
have fun, play games.

All that cool stuff.

Then we enter the kitchen.

In here we got some
slaves performing uh,


cool stuff like that.

Hey, sir,
what's going on.

Catch any crimes today?

I'm off duty, actually,

I am on vacation.

This is the boss right now.

I don't believe that
for a second,

I'll be the boss,
I can so do that.

I really think we should have
an intervention for Levi,

you know,
last night there was a lot
of stuff going on,

you know.

Hey guys, come on,
let's get this going,

I am hungry,
we got a lot to do today.


Hey, buddy,
what's going on!


Did you do it?

Did he have, like,
old greasy man balls?

Grow up.



Why aren't you helping me?

What do you mean?

I'm filming!
Do you see my movie?

Okay, Streak,
take care of this.

Wait, if we had a cow,
we'd have milk.

BEAN: Are you guys serious?
No milk?

I need my milk
in the morning!

We got a bus that runs
off French fry oil.

Hey, you know what,
if you have time,

could you get some milk?

This is from Milk Boy,
over there.

If we had a cow,

we should get a cow.

We should get a cow.

Hey, Tadpole.


Uh, bring some money.


How much?

BRICK: Um, whatever it costs
to buy a cow.

BEAN: Get a goat.

Good morning to those
of you just joining us

Hey, Casey,
would you help me out?


So is it forgiven?

Most definitely.


All is forgiven.


I don't hate you anymore.

SHARON: Hey, I made
some coffee, Danny.

You want some?


I gotta' go home.


That was fast.

Where were we when we lost
that last trickle of dream?


STREAK: I'll get it.

Something great is
about to happen

Here's one but talented,
Derek Comley


Good morning.

I'm Jack, she's Jill.

This is my little buddy,

John Jacob
Jingleheimer Schmidt.

Everybody keep your hands
where I can see them.

Okay, get your
cell phones out here
on this table.

Hey, Jack.

How's it goin'?
I already met Jingleheimer.

We're here for two reasons.

Son, get over there.

Get over there.


attacked my partners
here yesterday.

That was me.

Hey, did you know
that I kicked his ass

after he hit me
in the face?

Wasn't that awesome?

Did you hit this little boy?

Don't listen to him!

That was me.

Shut up.

Damn, who was it?

It was you.

You're kidding me, right?


You got your ass kicked
by a fucking girl,

you dumb pussy.

Yeah, look.

No Adam's apple.

So you beat up
a little boy

and got your ass
kicked by a girl.

Are you filming me?

No, no, no.
It's tape.

Tape, tape, tape.

Shut it off.

STREAK: Turning it off.

It's off.
It's off.

What a bunch
of fucking freaks.

Now this brings me
to the second part

of why we're here.

I will now take all
of your money
and valuables,

so get it out here
and put it in Jill's bag.

Let's go, let's go.


Hey, what's this?

Get back, get back.

Come here.


Well, are you a cop?

Or is this some kind
of costume party?

Yeah, it was
my son's birthday.

We all dressed up
like Halloween.

You like it?


Which one is your son?

It's me!
Hey, handsome!

Where's my present?

How 'bout a bullet
up your ass.

No, no thank you.

But hey,
I would love some

chocolate ice cream

and, ooh, vanilla,

oh, okay, cherries,
cherries too.

Can I have a lot
of cherries, please?


Very fine.

Yeah, this kid needs
a good ass-kicking.

You can kick my ass,
you know,
whenever you want,

just cake and ice cream first,

What's missing
from this bag of jewels

is the money
you folks made

on your little yard
sale yesterday.

Where, where did you...

Who is this little da...

Now I know you
made some money.

Because I came over here
and saw the crowd.

It was like
a fucking flea market.

So where's the money?

I made a bank deposit
this morning,

just take me
to any ATM

and you can have everything
that's in it, promise.

Someone's missing
and sent Jesus looking,

Who's missing?

My oldest son,
he went to work already,

he'll be back later on,
later on.

All right.

All right.
Let's visit this ATM.

But if there's not
at least a grand in there,

I'm gonna' come back,

and I'm gonna
burn this place
to the ground.

With all of you in it.

John, keep these nice folks
under wraps till I get back.

I, where's your gun?

It's in the car.

What the fuck?






Get back!

Back off!

What was that noise?

Bus runs great.

Casey, it would
be a great time
to use that gift.

CASEY: I can't,
you do it.

Come on, Casey, focus.

Remember the baseball
coming towards you.

Focus, swing, connect.

Home run.

I knew you could do it, Casey.

Hey, shssh.

Do not be afraid of him.


You are not hurt.

Get up.

Casey, it's your turn.

Help these people up.

What is it that you want?

Focus and connect.

Did you come for money?

Yeah, motherfucker, all of it!

go get the money.

TAD: All of it?

these people are hurt.

They need your help

CASEY: Focus and connect.

BRICK: How much is there?

TAD: Three-hundred
and twenty-five thousand.

Give it to Jack.

Casey, your uncle,
Levi's hurt real bad.

JACK: I never told
you my name.

BRICK: No, you didn't.

CASEY: Uncle Levi.

BRICK: It's not even
your real name.

You just like the sound
of Jack and Jill.

BRICK: Jack fell down
and broke his crown,


Now what else do you want?

What the fuck
is going on here?

You've got your money.

Now what else
do you want?

Think about it, Jack.

What do you want

more than anything else
in the world?

JACK: Who are you?

I am, you,

only slightly rearranged,

with different molecules
and experiences.


What happened
to breakfast?

Let's eat, come on.

About a zombie, okay?

Oh, a knowledge mummy
taking center wood.



BRICK: Are you hungry?

There's plenty.

That gun won't work.

Casey melted
the firing pin in it.

He can do that.

BRICK: We're going
on a little trip.

You can all come
if you want.

JILL: I wanna' come.

JOHN: Hey, yeah, me too.

If I come with you,
will you turn me in?

BRICK: No, I won't.

But it means we can't
come back for a while.

The Tribe have
to vote on it.

We can't take our car,
they'll be looking for us.

STREAK: We bought a huge bus,
and it's, uh, real big.

Our car's stolen.

We stole a lot of things.

BRICK: I have a suggestion
about that.

What if you abandon
everything you've ever taken?

And then what if,

you paid back
all the money

you'd ever stolen?

Well, they would arrest us,

BRICK: Send it by mail.

Write an apology note.

LEVI: Hey.

JACK: There's over
300,000 dollars
in here.

I may be a smartass,
but I don't lie.

Well, if we're gonna' go
on this long trip,

I'm gonna need
some new clothes,

a fresh, clean new pair
of clothes.


we'll actually all
need new clothes.

And food.

I will get
the canned goods,

we're probably going
to need some rations.

There's some crates
in the garage,

I'll go get those.

I'll get the chickens.

Why are you doing this?

When I was a little boy,

I had this gift,

and, uh, this voice,

that would guide me.

Along the way
I stopped listening
to that voice.

I started living for my,

my life from
the outside in,

seeing everyone else
but me.

My gift had
become a curse.

Then I found myself
on top of a building,

staring down.

Sitting there
in my 1200 dollar suit,

Italian leather shoes,

and I thought,

I'd rather live.

That voice came back
to me.

I decided to listen
to it this time.

JILL: Did you guys say you
had some extra clothes?

Because, my shirt's stolen,
and I'm gonna' need some.

JACK: Yeah, mine too,
from the Walmart
down the street.

Okay, we got plenty.

You might wanna' get rid
of that gun.


♪ Till we meet again

♪ Till we meet again

♪ We'll walk on

♪ Never knowing


You know, the truth is,

I like a good fight.

Truth is,

so do I.

♪ We will walk on

♪ Never knowing

♪ Never knowing

♪ We will walk on

♪ Never knowing

♪ Never knowing

♪ And some

♪ Will walk on

♪ Never knowing ♪


Are you okay?




So we had to leave
and never come back.

We found the perfect place,
paid cash forward

and turned it
into our version
of how life should be

here on this planet.

Miss Nancy told us once

that true change
starts with me.

We set out
to change the world.

The world changed us.


Have a seat, gentleman.

Did you watch the new tape?

Yes, we did,

and everybody looks

healthy and fine.

We want it back, too.

After I get your statement,
I think we'll be able
to wrap this up.

It was all camera tricks.

I did it on
a greenscreen.

Yeah, it was
a big greenscreen.

So, they call you Streak.

That's me,
I'm Buchanan.

And that's me,
Derek Lewis.

All right.

I need the both of you
to look over the rest
of the list,

read off those names,
and as you read them,

if you have personal knowledge
that that person is alive,

safe and sound,

I want you
to check yes,

if not, check no.

Sure, man.

Yasmin AlBustami,
alias Preacher Boy, yes.

Raven Valadez,
alias Bubbles, yes.

Josh Gilmore,
alias Tadpole, yes.

Scott Higgins, alias
Mighty Casey, yes.

Jeff Ingram,
alias Zippy,

that's a lot
of damn aliases, sir.

Looks like
a baseball team.

Or a gang of rough riders.

Either one.

So that's it?


Thanks, Bean.


And, uh, Streak,
for coming in

and clearing this up.

I will have your tapes
at the desk.


♪ I'll get the paper

♪ Then I'm afraid to read

♪ Turn on the big screen

♪ For some reality TV

♪ They're on the newscast

♪ Talking about nerve gas

♪ And we're running low
On bullets, beans and body bags

♪ Oh, what we doing?

♪ Where we going?

♪ We're gonna ruin
This whole world
Without knowing

♪ All these things they do

♪ They might please us

♪ When you help them

♪ Someone call Jesus

♪ Here we got napalm

♪ We got the atom bomb

♪ It's true we got Saddam

♪ Nothing we can do
when people wrong

♪ We'll keep trying

♪ And we'll keep dieing

♪ And we'll do it by the book
That we keep writing

♪ Oh, what we doing?

♪ Where we going?

♪ We gonna ruin
This whole world
Without even knowing

♪ All these things they do

♪ They might please us

♪ We need help
Someone call Jesus

♪ Oh, yeah

♪ Well, the rich
Are getting richer

♪ And the jobs
Are getting few

♪ Jesus, if you're coming by,
you better make it soon

♪ Oh, what we doing?

♪ Where we going?

♪ We gonna ruin
This whole world
Without even knowing

♪ All these things they do

♪ They might please us

♪ We need help
someone call Jesus

♪ We got technology

♪ And we can meet
Your needs

♪ We'll take a human seed

♪ And make him six foot three

♪ We'll make him stronger

♪ We'll make him faster

♪ He'll be the coolest kid
In school

♪ He'll be a bastard

♪ Mothers and fathers

♪ Talk to your children

♪ Call to page
Your precious love
And let it fill them

♪ And maybe one day

♪ We'll hear them all sing

We gotta smile
And be so proud like Jesus

♪ Oh, what we doing?

♪ Where we going?

♪ We gonna ruin
This whole world
Without even knowing

♪ All these things they do

♪ They might please us

♪ We need help
Someone call Jesus

♪ We need help
Someone call Jesus

♪ Jesus

♪ Amen ♪