Lots of Kids, a Monkey and a Castle (2017) - full transcript

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The day I die, a doctor will come
and certify:

"She's dead. Her heart has stopped,"
or whatever.

Then there are 3 options:

In a niche or a hole
underground

or cremate me.

Let's see.
Which option do I like the least?

Underground, horrible.
If I'm still alive, how do I get out?

I can't scream,
nobody hears me.

If I'm in a niche, inside the box,

imagine being inside the box.

Even if I scream or whatever...



Because many people have died
with their nails scraping the box,

buried alive.

That happens: "eclepsy" attacks.

I don't know how doctors

don't realize.

It's happened very often.

I think cremation
scares me the least.

But what if they burn me alive?

So the best option is,
once the doctor says I'm dead,

just stab me with a knitting needle.

Stick it right here in my bottom.

There, really hard.

And if I don't scream or anything,
then I'm dead.

Then you can cremate me
and go home.



Okay.

Oh, I forgot to turn off the camera.

Mom, I don't know how
to start the documentary.

Once upon a time,
there was a mother...

who made three wishes.

Or a recently married woman
who made three wishes.

The three wishes were:
have lots of kids,

a monkey,

which I've never had as a child
for various reasons,

and a castle.

But the castle was a bit far-fetched,

because a castle costs a lot of money,

and they weren't easy to find.

But deep down in my soul...

I had always wanted to live in a castle.
Always, always...

LOTS OF KIDS, A MONKEY AND A CASTLE

And who would've guessed it...

My life begins.

And my life begins:

with a child.

Then with two children...

Then three...

Four...

Five...

Six...
At the sixth, I got the monkey.

Then, another wish...

That was quite an unattainable one...

because we were
a regular middle-class family.

I worked,
I owned a nursery school,

my husband was an industrial engineer.

We lived quite comfortable
but we weren't rich.

We had a normal life,

saving money
any way we could.

We liked the simple life,

no squandering.

Then all of a sudden we were rich!

What do we do then?

My wish...

I had my kids,
I had the monkey...

Now all I needed was the castle.

Castles are for rich and nobles.

This was restored
by an Italian couple.

With a very Italian view of things.

See what a pretty bird?

This is a queen's bed.

That's mine, I'm the queen.

This is natural silk, look.

You can't get this anymore.

Look at that dress,
look at the frills.

Look at the detail of the frills
on the lace.

It's so pretty, so beautiful.

Look at this huge bed!

The ivy's growing.

It's the right color now.

You're stuck.

I don't know what else to say.

To make it clear, I want you
to take the photo of your grandmother...

I'll go get it, wait.

Oh, Gustavo, you're so excited
about this.

If you knew how I wish
you weren't making the film.

If you only knew...

I don't want it.

It's not a film for an audience,
it's a home movie.

Just family.
Not for people to watch.

People won't be amused.

It's funny for those who know me, but...

Look, take the picture
of your grandmother.

And my grandfather.

And you say "That's my grandmother"
who's my great-grandmother.

"This is my grandfather
whom I inherited from."

How can I say in a film that I inherited
money, bought a castle,

I came from a normal family
and then I became super rich?

How are you going to film this?
Anyone who sees it might think...

Well... It's true.

Since it's the truth,
they'll say "it's true."

But no one knows
what happened after that.

That's my maternal grandmother,
her name was Julia, like mine.

I was named after her.
Just Julia.

I didn't like the name Julia.

It was a common name.
But now it's pretty.

It's trendy.

Thanks to actresses like Julia Roberts,
Julia whatever...

I associate this picture
with her vertebrae.

I make such a strong association,

I can even see her
and also her vertebrae.

It scares me. It does.

It's not normal for people
to hold on to such things.

To hold on to their grandmother's
vertebrae.

I want to get used
to not being afraid

because I'd like to have
my grandparents somewhere visible.

I'd like to, but... it's made me
suffer so much all my life...

Are you still talking about
the vertebrae?

Oh my God, the vertebrae!

Oh Lord!

- Get ready for lunch.
- Oh, Julita!

You come in here and say:
"Of course this lady's fat."

"She's always got a leg of cured ham
waiting to be sliced."

I don't eat any of what's in here.

Normally I don't eat any of it.

It's a temptation.

Seeing the knife next to the ham...

Make a sandwich for Gustavo.

So, Mom, what happened
to the vertebra?

Someone took them?

I told you a million times.

When they piled them up
by the river...

- The bones?
- The bones. Slice more.

Here.

They kept two vertebrae
to remember her by.

Mom, wait.

It's not coherent!

You think if someone sees this

and you start talking about vertebrae...

- They won't grasp it.
- You already taped it.

They killed them.

My grandmother and her niece.

And they...

They covered them with stones
beside the river.

Yes.

The bodies were there
for a year or two.

So when they found them,
there was no flesh on them.

There were only bones,
the bugs had eaten the rest.

But I don't get it,
if you find your mother dead...

The birds, the bugs
had already eaten her.

If you pay for a grave in
a cemetery, why keep the bones?

Because you want to keep them!

Was it a tradition to keep
dead people's bones?

No way!

They killed her in the war
and left her in a pile by the river.

What is her family going to do?

Take her and bury her.

But you bury the whole body,
you don't just keep 2 vertebrae.

It's like keeping a finger!

Yeah, Mom, but...

I need to find the time
to study the story of my life.

No one is interested
in knowing my life story.

Yes, I am.

My bone gets twisted.

Until I get some momentum.

Where?

Where are the vertebrae?

What do you want
the vertebrae for?

Because dead people need
to be buried, Mom.

Having your dead grandmother
lost around the house is bad karma.

We need to look for them.

I'm not going to look for them.
Goodbye.

Look, Nacho, David.

I think up there
in all these boxes?

They might be up there.

Winter socks.

- Porcelain dolls.
- We need to lower the boxes.

- One by one?
- Monkey clothing.

And open them to see
if they're there.

Leather scarf.

If they're not here,
check the rest of the house.

Is it worth bringing
them all down?

Santa Claus hats.

Mom is coming!

I'm sorry, but you get out.

This is no time
to look for vertebrae.

This is total chaos.
I had it organized.

It was okay. I could walk in,
open the closet...

Oh, good lord.

You keep adding more things,
I can't open the closets anymore.

- This.
- Now what?

- What's this?
- That?

It's a chair to sit in the countryside.

But you don't use it anymore.
Throw it away.

No! Open it.

I can use it for support.

- It's broken!
- No, that goes in here!

- Throw it away.
- No.

Mom, it's broken.
Why keep broken umbrellas?

- We need to fix that one.
- There are 25 or 30 umbrellas.

- A cane with a flashlight.
- Leave it out there.

A cane with a bell.

Where do all these things come from?

This cane is broken.
Can we throw it away?

- That's Mari Juli's.
- It's for dancing.

No, it's to draw the curtains.

- A musical instrument.
- Over there.

This is total chaos.

Look, you guys even put your
bullfighting stuff in here.

- We need to throw things away.
- Forget it.

Is this the Diogenes thing?

I am not a compulsive hoarder!

An unopened gift.

A lot of them are unopened.

They were Christmas presents
and then I forgot.

What a nice wallet.

Another unopened gift.

Look at all of them.

The cowboy suit.

Let me see.

How cute!

All these things
are making me dizzy.

- What's this, an enema?
- Oh, this is great.

Put that over there.

This never ends.

Okay, we can go in now.

This is like a notions shop.

- We'll start looking box by box.
- No, no, no!

- Don't look there!
- Letters and notebooks.

Those are letters from my boyfriends,
don't touch them.

- "Crib bedding sets for dolls."
- How cute!

"Hat decorations."

Take some more boxes out!

I don't think we'll find any
with "Grandma's vertebrae"...

There's a bag here.

Suspicious...
Let me see that...

Oh, my God, Antonio, look!

My mother's teeth!

Look at this tiny frying pan.

This is so beautiful,
they are my life.

How can I live without them?

My whole life is in here.
I don't want to die

without these little details.
Look how cute.

Look at this little shoe.

Oh, please!

Dad bought a pair of pants
when we went on a cruise,

I shortened them
and kept the fabric.

Look, two little turds.

You go like this, look.

Did you leave your grandmother's
remains in the castle by chance?

No way, I always had them with me,
wherever I lived.

I'm going to look through these boxes.

Hey! Don't you dare!

Leave them there!

Don't even dare,
these are delicate flowers...

I said no, no!

You should be responsible
for your deaths, Mom.

I'm leaving you to do it

because I'm fed up with
the whole vertebrae subject.

Listen to what happened to me,

I went to the Corte Ingl?s,
I always have my breakfast at 12.

From 12:30 to 1, I have coffee with milk
and my toast.

Other women drink their beer,
whatever.

I'm having my so desired
coffee with milk.

I always use saccharine in it.

I'm fat, but I always use saccharine.

The saccharine I use comes
in those yellow tubes with a little top.

I can easily pop one in.

- One little pill.
- Okay.

There I am, I pour one...

I looked in it...

and inside the cup
there's a tooth!

No kidding!

I turned completely
red and I called the waiter:

Waiter, please!

I had already drunk it,
I wasn't going to vomit right there!

"Waiter, there's a tooth in my coffee.

He says: "How can there be
a tooth in your coffee?"

I said, "Look!"

He was really stupid,
utterly retarded.

He said, "It must be from the cow!"

The cow?!

It's cow milk!

When they were milking it
the tooth fell in.

What an animal!

He's asleep, look at him...

So I picked it up and it had a filling!

I opened my bag,

took out the saccharine...
It was full of teeth!

What are you saying?

The tube wasn't saccharine!

It was full of teeth!

No!

They were my children's teeth.

Whenever they lost a tooth, I saved it.

All of their teeth, when they fell out,
I saved them in those tubes...

Instead of putting saccharine in my coffee,
I put in a tooth.

Then I said, "My son's tooth!
Oh my God!"

It was so valuable.
I had been saving it all of my life?

So I grabbed the tooth while
the waiter was making a huge fuss,

which I had previously started,

I ran out, without paying,
ran to the escalator,

got to the street and yelled:
"Eureka, I'm safe!"

But I grabbed my son's tooth
and I still have the tooth,

because I saved it.

There's another one!

Nacho's first canine tooth.

May 18th, 1976.

Let's see if the vertebrae
is with the saints.

Don't start opening drawers!

Could they be here?

Old stockings.

I hadn't seen this.

- My mother and my father.
- Really?

Why don't we get rid of
these dead things all at once?

No.

This, the vertebrae,
in one fell swoop.

It's really heavy...

Now I don't know who is who.

This is your father.

- My father?
- Yes.

- And this one is my mother?
- Yes.

- Your father weighed more.
- No, it's the urn.

Why is this one covered?
So nothing spills out?

You scared me!

- The scissors.
- Here!

I'm opening it like a can.

My poor father and mother.

To think my father is here...

Look, I'm going to try something.

Maybe a miracle will happen.

What are you doing?

Let's see if this makes my knees
feel better and my eyes.

Don't throw them out
when I die. Save them.

At first I objected,
but now, I want them with me.

And when it rains and it's cold, I say
"It's great to have them here."

The dead are piling up on us!

And the vertebrae thing scares me.

If they don't show up,
it's fine with me.

It would be terrible if they
were in my room. Terrible.

You can't imagine how
much they terrified me.

The Civil War has left
a brutal mark on me.

Because I was being breast-fed,

while my mother cried over
her mother's death.

I'm sure her tears fell on me.

I don't really remember because
I was being breast-fed.

I was only a few months old.

That affects you.
It affects you a lot.

When I was eight or less,
or six years old,

I saw a dead person
for the first time.

Dead babies and I saw their faces...

Inside their coffins.

Also older children.
I dressed a child for burial

because his mother said
I had good taste dressing children.

While he was in the coffin,
I made him a little dress using pins.

I'm sure I pricked him a lot.

I dressed him and laid
some flowers in the box.

They never forgot it.

I really suffered.

However my parents knew how

to make me very happy.

Christmas, for example.

How happy I was at Christmas time!

It was wonderful, wonderful.

CHRISTMAS CAROLS

I celebrate Christmas

from December 1st

to September 15th.

The Nativity Scene
in the middle of June.

Nobody can believe it.

But it's true.

I'm giving them a bath.

Poor things, they must be roasting
with all this heat.

Mom, you're the only person
still using cassettes in 2014.

I can't be separated from it,
I take it wherever I want.

It's over-cooked.

Listen, it's fried.

We need to buy batteries.

Focus on Jose Antonio Primo
de Rivera's cross.

Why hasn't it been taken down?

Fascist symbols are prohibited.

This isn't fascist, it's...

They're crossed arrows.

The bow...

The yoke and the arrows, that's...

Spanish? Or Castilian...
I don't know what it is!

Croquettes have ruined my life.

- Croquettes?
- Always the same dream.

- Croquettes?
- Yeah.

I was in love with Jose Antonio.

Jose Antonio Primo de Rivera,
founder of the right-wing Falange Party.

He was super handsome.

So in these dreams I had
that were very dramatic,

very dramatic dreams...

I don't know how,
but I made croquettes with his body.

But his body wasn't in front of me.

I just made them,
Jose Antonio croquettes.

You mean with his flesh.

With his flesh,
I made croquettes.

And I said,
as if there was an audience:

"These are the
Jose Antonio croquettes."

The young girls, we were Falangists.

We wore a shirt, and here,
there was a little strap here,

with the red hat.

You wore that?

No, only when we had to go out to march.

I had a number, a very low number...

My grandfather was
the number 2 Falangist in Cuenca.

I have the membership card.

I don't know what number
I had but the other day,

Antonio was looking on Internet and I said:
"Look up my name."

The only thing that came up was
that I was a Falangist.

- Really?
- Imagine.

Mom, you're a Falangist?

I am, I never gave up
my membership.

I never pay anything.

I was a Falangist and later I forgot!

Everyone before you gave up
their membership.

You had number 64.

Back then it was great!

Mom, I never knew any of this!

We were super conservative!

They killed my grandparents,
they killed his grandparents,

the Reds killed them,
the Communists.

So we were against the Communists,

against the Reds,
we were right wing.

So when all of this was over,
when there was democracy,

didn't you realize who you supported
and the group you belonged to?

We were just fine with that.

We didn't have any other vision then.

Not even democracy!

We didn't know what democracy was.

Kids, we're talking about politics!

Can you give me my coat please?

The checkered one.

Having your grandmother's vertebrae
in a box, all your life.

You tell that to my grandfather.

- They didn't know what to do with them.
- It was my grandfather.

He saved the vertebrae.

He's the guilty one!

Poor thing, she was his wife.

Look, you two can do something...

Look for it starting from the top.

But leave me out of it.

Mom, would the vertebrae be
in one of these boxes?

The vertebrae in one of these boxes?
Don't make me laugh.

Seriously.

You're obsessed.

Why are you so obsessed?

Mom, we need to bury them.

You ask me for things

and later you mess up my whole house
looking for the vertebrae.

Mom, could they be
in the doll room?

In the doll room,
I can't look there now!

How can the vertebrae be
in the doll room?

Look at this cute doll!

What must they think of me?

- Who?
- My grandchildren.

They don't appreciate it,

they don't pay attention
and don't care.

If my grandma spent all day
making dolls

and little dresses for them,
I would go crazy.

I have 125 dresses.

You made them all, right?

Totally modern, look.
With fur and everything.

And quilted.

All replicas of when
I was a little girl.

My mother made me this one.

When I was 14 years old.

He's going to knock over
my mother's picture

and he'll break it.

- I'm coming.
- Look at the photo of my mother.

He's going to break it!

Watch out!

I knew it!

- Is it broken?
- No.

I'm going to put it near me.
I want to see them.

Look, this is so cute.

The little dog.
Look how cute this little dog is.

This is the first photo of my life,
in 1935.

What a time to be born,
right before the war.

Look at my mischievous face.

I was very funny.

I used to come here to bathe the dolls.

Well, their little dresses.

I had a sister,

pudgy, pudgy, pudgy.

Look how cute.

And since she was
my little sister,

I loved to hold her.

Poor thing.

She bore the burden

of all my parents' suffering.

She was always sick.

She died young.

I don't understand anything.

An aspiring nun.

I came very close to being a nun.

That's why I took this photo.

Because I wanted to be like a nun.

I didn't know I could be happy in the
world with another person.

I thought I could only be
happy being a nun.

But I met him and I was so happy?

Look at my great figure!

In pants.

I didn't want to be unappreciated.

My God? Look at me
then and look at me now.

I married 50 kilos
and now I'm married to 100.

Oh my God!

Look at your waist!

I don't have a waist...

- You don't have one?
- Absolutely not.

If you'd touch me more often!

- But you rarely touch me!
- Right...

You'd get mad at me.

Like I would dare to complain
if you touched me!

Yes.

- I'm looking forward to it!
- Yeah, right...

That's not true.

You don't touch me because I'm fat!

Because you think you're
touching lard or fat!

And since I don't say anything,
you don't care about what you eat.

If you took the time
to touch my whole body,

I'd say: "At least he went to
the trouble to touch all of me."

But you don't touch me.

I understand.

You don't touch me because
I'm not tasty.

I'm a greasy woman

and I'm not desirable at all.

Oh, love of my life?

We're talking about me today,
it'll be your turn some other time.

Some other day we'll talk about you...

Hey, Antonio!

I can't kiss him,
because it gives off feedback.

He doesn't let me get any closer.

I can't... We're both so impaired.

I'm fat and you're deaf.

I'm going to lift myself up.

I feel I'm on my last legs

in this bed with
the bars on the side.

Oh, my God!

This innocent fork...

People think I was here
having dinner...

I leave it there, and no, no.

This fork is...

to stab Dad with because, look.

Sometimes he makes weird noises,
like...

Like "rabbles."
What's it called?

- Rattles.
- Death rattles.

And I say: "He's dead."

So I stab him to see if he's dead.

I stab him, and if he says:
"Ow, Julita, what do you want?"

I say: "Nothing."

And I close it so he won't see.

I say: "No, no. You were just..."

But he doesn't realize it's the fork.

Or he'd get angry.

Everyone should have
one of these forks.

This was my father's factory.

We come, dump our stuff,

and if someone else comes
and needs it, they take it.

It's like a junk exchange.

Pots from the whole family.

Whoever wants a pot,
they come and pick one.

- Those are mine.
- Oh, they're yours?

- You can't take them.
- Then put "Do not take."

Good lord, what a bunch of crap.

- Mom, do you need your jacket?
- No.

- I'll leave it here.
- Okay.

I'm coming, lord have mercy!

There are new things
every time I come.

New junk.

It just keeps growing.

The stones...
Hey, I want to take some.

We have to throw these things out.

City Hall is going to complain.

The containers will cost a fortune.

Every time I come here,

Gustavo tells me to find the vertebrae.

"Find the vertebrae?"
Like it's easy!

- Where to start!
- "Since you're going, find the vertebrae."

Chairs David found in the street.

32 of these chairs...

People throw things out,
we don't.

- We pick them up.
- That's the difference.

Because they don't have
a huge warehouse.

If they did,
they might keep things too.

Why should I throw out
the maracas?

Because you have 20.

- I'm taking them with me.
- What for?

- Don't take them with you, Julita.
- What for?

Where will you take them?
Her mind just isn't...

I'm taking the things I need.

Don't you think that throwing
things away liberates you?

You throw away part of your life.

Every thing here, even if it's old,

has the life that you have left in it.

And of course,

you lose these things and
you lose part of your life.

What a pity!

There are so many
things I want to do.

But I'm not strong enough anymore.

Mentally, yes,
but physically I can't.

Hey, are those pots yours?

Look! Oscar!

He's with you here, Gustavo!

You're kissing him in this picture!

My God, he was so mean!

Oscar came into my life
at a time when

I'd lost a child...

and I think he replaced
that affection.

We saw him in a sell & buy
magazine.

The advertisement said:

"Monkey who eats at the table
with owners.

With his little plate,
his little spoon

and you can put little dresses on him."

And since I'd always dreamed
of having a monkey,

and this one could even wear dresses
and ate from a plate,

I said: "He's the one.
Let's buy him, quick."

He behaved terribly.

One day we had a fight,

testing each other,

and right here on my hand?

That's where he bit me.

He tore this muscle open
and you could see the bone.

One day he was in the garden,

he climbed up a tree,
tied up to a chain.

He broke the chain
and attacked a woman,

he pulled her bun out.

This wasn't the monkey they told me
who ate on a little plate.

In the end he got too aggressive
and we had to give him away.

It was very nice, very nice...

Very nice.

Before the economic crisis, right?

Oh, the crisis.

FOR SALE

Mom, when we edit the film,

the financial ruin
has to be included.

For the family, fine,
but not for other people to know...

They'll see me and say:
"Look, Julita went broke."

- Why's that a problem?
- It's not a problem at all.

You wouldn't care, right?

We have two alternatives:
One, wait for them to take it,

two, give it to them.

Living in a castle isn't so great
knowing you're going to lose it.

We'll end up losing 22 million euros

or 23 million euros.

We can't get it back.

The lawyers said it's better
just to hand it over,

otherwise things
would be too complicated.

Look, Mom,
we met with the lawyer.

We owe the bank
seven million euros.

- How much?
- Seven million.

Seven million.
How much in pesetas?

Seven times 166...

That's 1.06 billion pesetas.

Impossible.

Yeah, because
it's not just the castle.

There are several other debts.

You need to turn in the keys
to the castle on November 12th.

- In...
- Good lord.

...a little over a month.

You mean empty
the whole castle?

Of course! We're not leaving
all we have in there!

The bank will take the property
but they won't take what's inside.

We're running out of money
and we'll still have the burden of the castle.

It's going to be a very hard moment...

Hello?

Let's do a three-way call

or four or five-way call?

So the whole family can talk?

Mom, can you hear me?

- Yes.
- Yes, I'm listening.

Okay.

- Gustavo, are you there?
- Yeah, I'm here.

I don't hear Gustavo.

- I'm right here.
- I'll try calling Gustavo.

- I'm here.
- Okay, try him.

I'm here. Hello!

So we need to do this
without suffering

and be positive and happy.

Even try to make it festive,
just make the most of it.

Exactly.

We have to organize the transport,
packing, materials

and inventory...

Don't buy any boxes,
we'll get them from the trash.

There's no reason to spend money.

I want everything
because I like everything.

There's nothing I don't like.

First we take inventory, room by room:
This yes, this no.

A sticker, like Dad said,
on each thing we take.

There are too many objects here
to go one by one.

We have to group things together.

We can't do that now.

Divide everything in parts
like we're dead.

That's what you do
when parents die.

I'd bring a truck
just for this chandelier.

I think it's a crazy idea.
The lamp stays.

Dad, how much does it weigh?

- That weighs a lot!
-1100 pounds?

Yes, it can easily weigh
1100 pounds.

I'm going to get electrocuted.

You can start unscrewing
all the wall fixtures.

Mom, your painting?

- Of course, take it down.
- Madrid.

Mom and Dad took it well.

Because they're with their kids.
That's all they really want.

What if we find a box?

Forget the vertebrae...

We can't focus on that now.

We take the suits of armor,
the sculptures,

the paintings worth taking...

This is really a mess.

How many trucks do you think
we'd need to empty the castle?

Six or seven.

Just to take what you like.
But we're taking everything.

One, two and...

- Fuck.
- It weighs 1,050 pounds.

Mom is thrilled.

All her children working together.

The whole family.

These two go together.

- Okay.
- They match.

Should we take down the dinnerware?

Where is...?

Wait, where is what?

It's impossible.

It's impossible to take
everything here.

We choose what we have to
and the rest stays.

But how?

Dad, you chose to take
90o% of what's here.

Relax.

Relax? We have two days

and Dad says that if you leave,
we're leaving too.

You insisted on doing it
ourselves.

It's madness.
It's pure madness.

We can't try to take everything.
It's absurd.

Absurd.

We can't afford a moving truck
like everyone else?

- We checked everything off.
- The piano, the table,

- all the chairs...
- Who'll move the piano?

My brothers?

It's up to you.

Your sons might get hurt.

Then we order a moving truck.

Mom, when I showed you the estimate
you said:

"That's too expensive.
50 cubic meters, 2,400 euros."

So I said: "Fine, we rent a few trucks.
That's the cheapest option."

And we'll do it ourselves.

We can't pack all of the dishes
and silverware ourselves.

- So you just leave it?
- You see?

You want to take it
and I don't.

NORMAL GLASSES

You don't think material things
are mundane and hold you back

and that having less things
elevates you spiritually?

No way.

It needs another log.

I'm in no shape to chop wood.

Then we'll just buy firewood.

Where?

Because all this saving money...

We have a castle
and now all this economizing...

We can buy a castle
but we can't afford firewood.

The sleeping pills...

Oh, please.

Someone took them.

Last night I was up until 3 A.M.
looking for the sleeping pills.

I had to eat a chorizo sandwich
in the end.

I'd like to erase all of that.

Typical nouveau riche

who paint their faces up there
and leave them there.

I don't want my face
to be left up there.

Because you're ugly.
If you had my face...

Take a chisel to it.

- That's what I mean.
- Or sand it off.

- With a sander...
- With a wire brush.

Sand it right off.

I don't think it really matters.

It's part of the history
of the castle.

A couple bought the castle
and put their children up there.

How do you know they won't be
there for a thousand years?

Same goes for the chapel.

The Marquises of Madrid.

We're having fun after all.

Having lunch, dinner, everything...

We're having fun.

Which is great because
I do have a lot of sadness.

Dad is obsessed
with the butane tanks.

Not a single painting...

We have plenty in Madrid.

And another obsession:

Emptying the gas tank.

Please!

You dropped the head.

Yeah, the top of the brain.

You still want to take it all
to Madrid?

Leave everything in the factory
to rot, like I said...

So you prefer the other option,
to leave it here.

What do you want to leave?

Say it.

The structure and the decorations...

Then leave the paintings,
they're decorations.

It's Diogenes.
This is perfect for us.

This is very hard.

This is very hard to do.

It needs a box around it.

I don't want to fall into sadness.

We have to accept it and get over it.

We had a good time for 14 years.

We did a lot for the castle.

We've made improvements,
made it more valuable in many ways,

and in this life,
not everything lasts forever.

It's so hard to install.

It's so easy to disassemble.

Okay, all set.

We can leave the toilet brush, right?

Mortgages terrify me.

But everyone has one, everyone.

Poor people, rich people.

Everyone mortgages their houses.

And everybody was stupid
because we were all wrong.

The banks were loaning money
out very cheap and you'd say:

"I'll just invest in real estate."

Then what happened, happened.

We still have to take down
the chandelier.

I think we should avoid
dividing things in parts.

Or have a lottery
and you're stuck with it!

How did you two move before?
Just Dad by himself?

We didn't move castles!

Chaos has taken over.

A chaotic family
making chaotic decisions

organized in a chaotic way.

A large family
organized in a chaotic way.

First time ever.

Another package.

Another package headed to Madrid.

I don't want to see this place
plundered.

I don't want to see
the castle emptied out.

So I'm leaving.

Dad says that once we take
the important things,

the chandelier, the chapel,
he's leaving because

he doesn't want to see us
plunder the place.

That's right.

Someone's coming?

Hey, guys, if people come,

we should hide.

We might be in the local papers.

The whatever family is broke, etc.

Of course we will be.

Who cares if people know?

Well, that's true.

We're all going to die anyway.

When Dad notices the statues
are gone, he'll say:

"You're stripping the place."

It's so painful.
What's next?

And then, financial problems.

Not just mine, but for everyone.

I'm suffering so much,

that I think, if I died
I could finally rest.

I think it's a bad time for you to die.

It would be inconvenient.

I've wanted to die
many times during my life.

It's silly, but I feel the weight...

And I'm not the woman
I'd like to be.

I'd like to be affectionate,

kiss my children,
be different,

but I can't.
It's too much for me.

I just can't do it.

I don't know why, but I can't.

I feel the need to hug them
deep in my soul...

I feel it, but I can't do it.

Now I'm getting obsessed
with Dad dying.

And I can't bear it.

I cannot bear it.

Then I think: I have
to be nicer to him

and be more understanding.

But later the reality is I'm not.

Dad, why don't we leave
a written note for posterity?

Yes.

It could read:

"Please take care of it."

"It was my love,
but I was thrown out."

I have so many memories
on this terrace. So many...

It hurts on the inside,
seeing that I've reached the end.

Enjoy, this might be
our last meal out here.

Don't think about it.

Nacho, is there a dolly around?

This is mine.

- Hi, Mom.
- Hi.

We're talking about the random stuff.

I say we group it in parts.

First, what goes to the factory...

What each of us is going to take,

and prepare each batch.

At the door, and each person
takes theirs.

I'll go first...

Mom wants it all right here.

It's her house, her things, and she has
a right to do anything she wants.

That's relative.
We all live here.

This part of the room
isn't being used,

if we organize it, it can fit...

Half the living room for storage?

The whole house is full of junk.
Every single room.

Besides the storage rooms
full of useless crap.

I say put it all in the factory.

Mom can decorate
however she wants.

Whatever she doesn't use
goes to the factory.

No, we're good.

Keep going.

Why don't we build a shed
in the yard to store things?

How are you feeling?

Lousy.

Why lousy?

Because of everything.

That's not true.

We have to pay a 2,000 euro fine.

Want some omelet?

- No, we don't.
- Not me.

Good lord.

Thank God Christmas is coming soon.

It's July, Mom...

I don't care.

I'm dying for Christmas to be here.

What are you going to do with all this?

Take it to the factory.

Mom, you're worrying me a little.

Don't you worry,

I'll resurrect later.

We have to sell things.

We put everything up for sale
and nobody buys anything.

This is the best part of the day.

I love it.

Look how the corners are burnt.

No, I'm fine.

Listen to that crunch!

Look, there's the Orfidal.

But Mom, try not to take Orfidal.

- You'll become a junkie...
- I already am a junkie.

Life has given us

a lot of suffering lately.

For my children,

but on the other hand,

I'm lucky to have them here.

50 years old and they've come back
to live with their parents...

It's wonderful.

Well, on one side it's bad,
on the other side it's good.

They left, and they're back.

Message from his Majesty
the King to the Spanish people.

- Quickly.
- Turn it up, Dad.

Paloma!

Today, looking back,

I can feel nothing but

pride and gratitude
towards all of you.

Our long and profound
economic crisis

has deeply scarred
the fabric of our society.

But it is also showing us
a future path

filled with hope.

That is why I have decided
to end my reign

and abdicate the Spanish crown.

Spain will always occupy
a very special place

deep in my heart.

- He didn't say anything.
- What are you talking about?

He said everything.

He's a nice king, but I think...

Even if I didn't like him...

I'm not a monarchist.

Why does a man inherit,
who might be a jerk,

which in this case he isn't, but...
No, no, no.

Spain can't afford a mess like this,
especially right now.

I don't mean now.
I don't like monarchies.

- Okay!
- I don't like them.

Why should they have
more privileges?

- What nonsense.
- Why?

- I don't like monarchies. No, sir.
- Utter nonsense.

The Republic ended with the war in '36,
with the National Movement.

But the Republic coincided
with the war.

What do you mean, coincided?

Franco rose up against
the Republic!

Badly done on Franco's part.

If he hadn't risen up,

we'd be living better,
my mom would have cried less

and I'd have less
psychological problems.

And you too. Your grandparents
wouldn't have died.

Your mother would have
been happy.

And it's Franco's fault...
What a saint!

...that our families, yours and mine,
suffered so much.

Yes, that's true.

If Communists take over,
fine, let them.

We'd have thrown them out.

Communists take over?

Fine, let them come for a year.

Until the next elections
and they lose.

They spent 70 years in Russia.
In the U.S.S.R.

She says I had it easy
during the war. Yeah, right.

For you it wasn't so bad.

All I had to eat was white rice.

Not even with a spoon,
with a shoe horn.

You ate beef and pork.
And a nice cured ham!

- That's true.
- What do you know?

You've never gone without,
you were a rich little brat.

What do you know about
suffering?

You don't even know
what that means.

But you two agree
on a basic level, right?

No, we disagree more
every day.

- On a basic level...
- No.

Human beings have to change.

Our cells change
every day.

You have to change
because life changes.

Nature changes, people change,
you have to change.

And you're all still living
in the past...

Put this on for me,
I can't do it.

You're the industrial engineer
specialized in mechanics.

Well, that's mechanics.

It goes like this, I think,
I don't know.

Well, you're the mechanic.

Like this, I guess, who knows.

Like this?

- You tell me.
- How should I know!

Grandma!

Grandma, look!

Hello?

- Nacho.
- What's up?

Hey, someone robbed the factory.

We just got the call.

You're kidding.

I'm going now with
Mom and Dad.

We're done now.

How did they get in here?

They broke a fence over there.

A lot of things from the castle
are missing.

The bed, it's too visible.

Maybe they'll come back
some other day to take it.

Yes.

They took all the valuable things:
paintings, statues...

The suits of armor
were in that corner,

the swords and all that.

I warned all of you...

that it was crazy
to bring everything here.

And no one listened to me.

All I'm saying
is I hope I die soon.

To avoid all the suffering.

Avoid you dying, I don't want to see it,

my children unhappy.

I have to die someday anyway.

Since I have to die anyway,
the sooner the better.

- It's not that.
- Yes, it is.

- That's not how I think.
- All I see is unhappiness.

A lot of this is my fault.

I should have been a nun.

If I had become a nun,

I wouldn't have any possessions

or suffering or anything.

Just the habit on my back.

We have to get rid of it all.

- Sure.
- Everything.

You put more and more
in your backpack,

and finally it's so heavy
you can't move.

Please, thieves!
Come and take everything!

Sure, everything or nothing.

Take everything or nothing.

My God, we don't have time
or a life or anything.

What are these?

Good lord.

I'm taking these plastic plates with me.

Everything is such a mess, my God!

What a mess!

Oh...

Julita, Julita,

You've given me so much trouble.

So much trouble.

I certainly have at your side.

Who would ever think to marry me?

Poor fool.

David.

No, I was thinking that maybe

with all the stuff we brought
from the castle,

maybe in one of the boxes?

Because we didn't look
for the vertebrae in the castle.

Oh, good lord!

I just want to find them?

You're sick.

Find them and bury them.
We have to bury them.

First, you bury them.

Second, you have to find them.

Okay, we have to look for them.

My grandmother was wearing
one like this when they killed her.

I always wore one like this
around my neck.

I even slept with it,
I'm surprised it didn't leave...

Saint John of the Cross,
good lord.

I used to read him every day.

And now I'm practically
an atheist.

Well, actually, I'm a mason.

Antonio, I'm a mason.

That's great. I've heard you say
so many things

that nothing you say
surprises me anymore.

Whatever you say.

I've come to realize

that it's totally impossible

that Jesus Christ is God.

Totally impossible.

Anyone even remotely intelligent
knows it.

Unless you're a bonehead.

So the Jesus Christ
who I loved so much,

worshipped so much,

I've lost him.

I've lost him.

And it's too bad,
because having faith

is one of the most important
things in life.

Having faith is wonderful.

Because life doesn't make
any sense.

And if you have faith, it does.

Because you know that life
never ends.

That this life ends and another
begins, much more sublime,

where you meet your maker

and where you find the peak
of your existence.

But I don't believe it.

So I don't have much time left to...

I don't have much time left
to be able to...

fulfill my...

Look at these tiny scissors!

It's blocked.

In this last drawer...

I'm talking to him about
the needle you have to...

When I die,
once I'm really dead...

Yeah?

Before they burn me,
stab me with a needle.

The needle is here.

- What for?
- To see if I'm alive.

- It has to be a special needle?
- Yes.

- Why? Who cares?
- I'll have it ready for you.

Well, it's thinner than this one.

Hey, what's so funny?

I was expecting a pin,
not a knitting needle.

Finer than this.

Look, this one's sharp enough.

You can pick one when I die.

We don't have to pick one tonight.

It's not that urgent.

Okay, the second part.
Come here, Marian.

Shut the door and turn off
the light.

You'll handle the musical
background.

Okay.

If I'm alive, because if I'm dead,
it won't matter.

Right.

Look.

The cassettes are in here.
Oh, lord.

They're right here.

"Silent Night."

Put it in like this.
Here's another copy.

And here's another player
in case that one doesn't work.

It's right there.

Maybe we can leave the needle
next to it.

I'll have it all ready for you.

- Oh, Granny...
- I just got an idea.

I got an idea,
I already told Gustavo.

I don't want them to dress me up
like they do at funerals,

they dress you up...

I want a nun's habit!

No, don't be surprised.

I got married in a nun's habit.

No one will see you.

Those of you who see me.

No, the coffin will be closed.
No way.

No, you have to see me
in my nun's habit.

No way, forget it.
I don't want people to see that.

You don't have to look.

I don't want people to see you
like that.

Look how beautiful.

Stretch.

I have the needle,

the song "Silent Night,"

and the habit.

Here we go again!

And my will is already written.

- I'm leaving.
- Let's all leave.

Okay, Mom. Just die then.
What can you do?

Forget the will,
there won't be anything left.

Who cares.

You can all fight over
whatever you want.

I'll be dead and buried.

This bread is so good!

It's really good.

I might get up tonight.

To do what?

To eat this.

Because my attraction
to this bread is so strong

that I won't be able to sleep.

And I'll have to get up.

Go ahead. If you want to die,
keep eating.

- I don't want to die.
- Or stop eating.

- That's right.
- It's incompatible.

90-year-old overweight people
never survive.

Many 90-year-old people
who aren't overweight do survive.

You could burst anytime.

You need to know that.

- Very nice.
- Dad, it's reality.

Those are the statistics.

We can't beat the laws of nature.

She's already defied the average,

now she's staring death
in the face and saying:

"Bring it on: I'm going to live
another year and eat even more!"

Bring it on!

I'll keep living!
Bring it on!

It's not defiance, it's ignorance.

She wants to challenge death.

She wants to say:
"You know what?

I don't care, I'm just going
to keep living and keep eating."

I don't eat so much!

You already ate it.

Yes, I did!

You really hurt me.

Come on, let's have a snack.

It's over.

Lift me up.

Lift me up.

Okay, 1, 2, 3.

Oh, please.

I want to die again!

You wanted a dress rehearsal,
now you got it.

Mom, we found the vertebra!

I don't believe you.

Where was it?

Here?

I'm not going to tell you.

I found them.

You found them?

In the factory?

- No, right here.
- Here?

Oh! I'm scared and everything.

My God.

- I don't know what this bone is.
- Let me see.

I've never seen it in my life.

- No idea.
- Look what's in here.

- Oh, please.
- Let me see.

- Must be from her teeth.
- Show me.

- Look how tiny.
- They're from the teeth, yes.

- They're?
- They shrunk.

This little thing is a finger.

- A finger?
- Yeah.

- I'm shocked.
- Mom, it's a finger.

- A finger?
- Yeah, look.

Oh, poor thing.

Look at it.

What do we do with all this now?

I don't know.

"Immediately cures all types of vomiting,

all types of diarrhea."

Yes, it was for diarrhea.

How can you keep your
grandmother for 80 years

in a little box for diarrhea pills?

I didn't put it there,
my grandfather did.

You think normal people
keep vertebrae at home?

Nobody, nobody does.

My great grandmother's
vertebra.

Which when you die,
I'll inherit, or my siblings...

It's yours,
you can keep it forever.

What am I supposed to do with it?

Shouldn't we bury them?

- You go ahead.
- No, all of us.

The whole family.
We'll go to the river

- and suffer...
- No, somewhere else.

We'll go somewhere,
have a ceremony, bury them

and let them rest.

Let your children inherit them.

Don't you know the theory
that says

that if you don't bury the dead,
who symbolize material things,

bones symbolize the material,
and if you don't bury them,

you're ruined?

Well, serves us right
for not burying them!

I didn't know that!

If I'd known

I would have buried them years ago.

GRANDMOTHER'S VERTEBRA

Oh, God. The things you do
for your kids.

You don't want the movie
to come out?

No, I don't.

Because I know what
audiences like.

Audiences are tremendous.

A film has something deeper.

It needs a serious script, it needs...

good photography,
good music...

It needs a lot of things.

It's very complicated.

I think it's extremely difficult.

This is my first feature film.

Feature? You mean long?

My God!

Unbelievable.

Who would have ever thought
I would sleep in a library?

This is too much.

Let's see?
What did I come in here for?

This.

Poor thing. Look at the
little night table he has.

Nothing,
I haven't got anything.

- Just a lousy drawer.
- A suitcase.

This here.

I'm deaf now.

Don't talk to me.

I can't hear anything.

Bye, see you in the morning.

- Maybe. If not?
- He can't hear me at all.

I'm going to die completely alone.
He can't hear me.

Not even if I shout.
I can't live without the fork.

Look what I do.

He isn't aware of my little love games.

Look.

I put it like this and he lights up.

And I go to sleep thinking of him.

Look how handsome.

I think he loves me like back then.

And I feel what I felt then,

the same thing.

Exactly the same thing.

I have an idea!
When I'm about to die

If I die alone and nobody notices
and I feel ill,

I'll take Dad's photo

and put it here.

And don't take it away!

Then you can put the
shroud on me or whatever.

You're ashamed of dressing
me up like a nun.

I don't know why.

Where's my husband?

He's no trouble,
bless him.

Mom, can you think
of any final insight??

The movie is already done.

Yes, but I don't know,
maybe a deeper thought...

You can't think of anything?

Nothing comes to mind.

Only that the day of
my death grows closer.

I'm 81 years old.

And I see that
I'm getting worse.

I see that I'm getting old.

I can't walk, I need help.

And then?

I want to have fun!

And she built castles
in the air,

with clouds of cotton
under the sun,

in a place nobody
would ever find,

unless they were
out of their mind.

And she built fabulous windows,

full of light, magic and color,

and she kept every single thing
she could think of,

because it was all made
with love.

Subtitles ripped by RiYe